Kelly
Appearances
The Dr. John Delony Show
Our Nanny’s Husband Hit on My Wife
All right, this is from Beth and she says, over the holidays, my husband and I went on a trip to stay with my brother and his wife. My relationship with my brother has been complicated. I'm sorry, it was her brother. I said that wrong. My relationship with my brother has been complicated. For about a decade, we didn't speak, but we all really wanted to cultivate a healthier relationship.
The Dr. John Delony Show
Our Nanny’s Husband Hit on My Wife
I just finished the connections chapter of building a non-anxious life, so I pulled up the online questions for humans mentioned in the chapter, and we spent a couple of hours having the greatest conversation we've ever had. It culminated with me telling my brother all the ways I was proud of him. It was one of the best visits we've ever had. Thank you to you and your team for all that you do.
The Dr. John Delony Show
I’m Having An Affair With My Friend’s Wife
All right. This is from, I'm hoping I'm pronouncing her name correctly, Myrta.
The Dr. John Delony Show
I’m Having An Affair With My Friend’s Wife
Yes. All right. She says, we are a family of five with three teens. Dinner time has always been a priority in our family ever since the kids were little. I always made dinner together happen. Now that the kids are older with jobs and high school and activities, it's nearly impossible to have everyone together at home at one time. I've had to grieve that a little bit. It was hard to let go of it.
The Dr. John Delony Show
I’m Having An Affair With My Friend’s Wife
However, I decided to replace dinner time with questions for humans, parents, and teen cards. I gather the family around 9 o'clock as many times a week as I can, and we do a few cards. When I first brought up the idea, the teens rolled their eyes at me and gave me the, bruh, why? I'm assuming she has sons because I've heard that. My husband was skeptical.
The Dr. John Delony Show
I’m Having An Affair With My Friend’s Wife
Let me tell you, it has been amazing, better than I expected." It's not about the questions on the card. It's the fact that each person has a space to talk, a chance to express an idea or dream. There are no wrong answers except a shrug or an I don't know. I've learned new things about my family. It has started conversations that otherwise would never have happened.
The Dr. John Delony Show
I’m Having An Affair With My Friend’s Wife
It has brought about admittance to failures or dreams. We just finished the deck a few nights ago and my husband has already asked if there's a second edition.
The Dr. John Delony Show
I’m Having An Affair With My Friend’s Wife
Yeah, because sometimes when you're so legalistic about this thing that we do and you grasp onto it so tight— You lose it anyway because you're forcing it to happen. And yet, if you want your kids to have jobs, like, you know, my son works two nights a week, they're going to be gone. Right. And they have lives. This is what's supposed to be happening.
The Dr. John Delony Show
I’m Having An Affair With My Friend’s Wife
They're supposed to be that kind of peeling away a bit, but she just found a different way to make it work.
The Dr. John Delony Show
I’m Having An Affair With My Friend’s Wife
Right. And then, like in this case, they end up loving it. Of course they do. Because it's very important.
The Dr. John Delony Show
My Wife Suddenly Wants a Divorce After 23 Years
No, that's just Saskatchewan.
The Dr. John Delony Show
My Wife Suddenly Wants a Divorce After 23 Years
All right, so back in December of 2023, we spoke to a woman named Addie from New York. Her question was, she said, I'm a 56-year-old woman, and I feel like my life is over. I ruined my younger years with drugs and alcohol, and then the remaining years trying to fix what was broken about me, and I've run out of time. How do I not end up a miserable, regretful old person who dies alone? Okay.
The Dr. John Delony Show
My Wife Suddenly Wants a Divorce After 23 Years
Anyway, so Addie sent in a follow-up. One year ago today, I spoke with you on your show. I was a mess and hopeless that my life and myself could not get better. You gifted me numerous tools, FPU, EveryDollar, your books, and Ken Coleman's book. What a year. I got honest with two people close to me about my financial mess. They helped me figure out a plan using the Baby Steps.
The Dr. John Delony Show
My Wife Suddenly Wants a Divorce After 23 Years
I read both of your books. I've also passed them along to friends, took Ken's Coleman assessment, and did FPU. My life today is very different. I have a morning routine. I regularly exercise. I'm living on a budget. The best thing is that a former employer noticed a big difference in me and in May offered me a job with a $35,000 raise. Whoa!
The Dr. John Delony Show
My Wife Suddenly Wants a Divorce After 23 Years
When I called, I was pretty close to the edge, wishing that something would happen to me so that this could all be over. Now I cannot imagine thinking or feeling that way. I still have struggles with food and relationships, but hopefully those will work themselves out one day. Saying thank you isn't enough. I hope you come to the Northeast to speak one day soon so that I can properly thank you.
The Dr. John Delony Show
My Wife Suddenly Wants a Divorce After 23 Years
What a wonderful, wishing you all a wonderful holiday season. Thank you for all you do. We got this right before the holidays.
The Dr. John Delony Show
My Wife Suddenly Wants a Divorce After 23 Years
You know what happened to my finger.
The Dr. John Delony Show
My Wife Suddenly Wants a Divorce After 23 Years
No. It's on there for those that are watching.
The Dr. John Delony Show
My Wife Suddenly Wants a Divorce After 23 Years
Pretty much. So last week, I was making dinner with a mandolin slicer, and I cut off about the top, the whole quarter inch of the finger. I don't recommend doing it.
The Dr. John Delony Show
My Wife Suddenly Wants a Divorce After 23 Years
It looks gnarly. Yeah, because they had to cauterize it at the ER, so it's like all black. Here is a PSA to everyone. According to the nurse at the emergency room, it is the most dangerous kitchen appliance, and they get at least one a week in. So get rid of your mandolin slicers or at least use a glove or something. It's not worth the nicely chopped cucumbers. That's what I was chopping. Okay.
The Dr. John Delony Show
My Wife Suddenly Wants a Divorce After 23 Years
And you're not the only person that thought that either.
The Dr. John Delony Show
My Wife Suddenly Wants a Divorce After 23 Years
It's a mandolin slicer. You know what I'm talking about though, right? When you're slicing and it slices real thin slices of something.
The Dr. John Delony Show
My Wife Suddenly Wants a Divorce After 23 Years
But these are a lot faster, but they're very dangerous apparently. So it's just like a food slicer. And, yeah, a lot of people thought that I was really like shredding.
The Dr. John Delony Show
My Wife Suddenly Wants a Divorce After 23 Years
Like Duke Silver? So hard that I cut part of my finger off.
The Dr. John Delony Show
My Wife Suddenly Wants a Divorce After 23 Years
I wish it were, but that's not it, unfortunately. I was chopping up some cucumbers.
The Dr. John Delony Show
Dad Slept With My Wife’s Mom (It Ruined Everything)
All right, this is from Dominique. She says, my husband has never been a great gift giver. Birthdays, anniversaries, holidays, it always has me thinking of things for ideas for our family members, and he really puts no thought into any of it. When he buys things for me, I don't feel like he puts any thought or barely any into the gifts he gets me.
The Dr. John Delony Show
Dad Slept With My Wife’s Mom (It Ruined Everything)
This year for Christmas, I gave him a list of about 10 gift ideas all with various price ranges. The only thing from that list he got me was candy and it wasn't even the kind I asked for. I thanked him for the gifts he did that he did get me and I haven't said anything further. However, I'm quietly upset about his lack of effort or thoughtfulness.
The Dr. John Delony Show
Dad Slept With My Wife’s Mom (It Ruined Everything)
Do I have the right to be upset or should I just be grateful that I got anything at all?
The Dr. John Delony Show
Dad Slept With My Wife’s Mom (It Ruined Everything)
I don't know if you remember, but I think it was after my birthday or Mother's Day a couple years ago. And I texted you because I had that same thing where I like to bake. And everything that I'd gotten for Christmas or my birthday or whatever it was, was kitchen stuff.
The Dr. John Delony Show
Dad Slept With My Wife’s Mom (It Ruined Everything)
And I remember having my feelings hurt because I thought, oh, so this is all like, y'all just go in there and bank me something, you know? And I've reached out to you and you said, well, have you ever told him? I was like, well, no, he should know. And you were like, no. And so this past year was the first year that I said something to my husband and he said, oh my gosh, I'm so sorry.
The Dr. John Delony Show
Dad Slept With My Wife’s Mom (It Ruined Everything)
I just know you like to bake and I thought these were things you'd want. And then I was like, he's right. They were things I wanted.
The Dr. John Delony Show
Dad Slept With My Wife’s Mom (It Ruined Everything)
Right. I get that. And I did. And then he's like, and so he was, he was. so upset and baffled that I thought this. And then I realized, well, yeah, because he knows I love doing that and he's buying me something he loves that he thinks I'll love. And the thing was, I did like most of them, but this year he, I asked him, I said, would it help you if I gave you a list? And he said, tremendously.
The Dr. John Delony Show
Dad Slept With My Wife’s Mom (It Ruined Everything)
Now the difference is he got me almost everything on my list and for him, it took the pressure off. I got what I wanted and it was great. And he got me a few surprises and it was great. Now, she may have to have another conversation. I had to go a layer deeper and tell him why those gifts quote-unquote hurt my feelings, which is stupid, but the idea of what I was feeling.
The Dr. John Delony Show
Dad Slept With My Wife’s Mom (It Ruined Everything)
And then he was like, oh, I'm so sorry I never meant that. And then when he explained why he got me those things, I realized, oh, that's really sweet. It was just a conversation.
The Dr. John Delony Show
Dad Slept With My Wife’s Mom (It Ruined Everything)
Oh, I think it happens a lot.
The Dr. John Delony Show
Dad Slept With My Wife’s Mom (It Ruined Everything)
There's a SNL. You could look it up with Kristen Wiig where she's the mom and it's all Christmas morning. And it's hilarious, the whole thing about her getting just a robe. It's worth watching. Yeah. But also, you know what? If you don't like what he gets you, tell him, hey, get me gift cards and let me go shopping. That's right. Because I love to go shopping with other people's money.
The Dr. John Delony Show
Dad Slept With My Wife’s Mom (It Ruined Everything)
So tell him that. Yes. Make it easy.
The Dr. John Delony Show
I’m Angry All the Time and It’s Ruining My Life
All right, this is from Cheryl in Cleveland, Tennessee. She says, how do I tell my sister who I love and respect that I don't want her to evangelize to my neighbors and strangers when we are out together? We are of different faiths and it is difficult for me to feel comfortable after she does this. I have tried, but I think she believes that she is doing God's work and that trumps my opinion.
The Dr. John Delony Show
I’m Angry All the Time and It’s Ruining My Life
Yeah, it does sound like. I mean, she's already told her, so.
The Dr. John Delony Show
I’m Angry All the Time and It’s Ruining My Life
I think at this point, the ball's. I don't think she's the problem. I don't think there's a problem here. But now she gets to choose.
The Dr. John Delony Show
I’m Angry All the Time and It’s Ruining My Life
Yeah, it makes me wonder almost, and this is purely conjecture. Does Cheryl, I mean, she said they were of different faiths.
The Dr. John Delony Show
I’m Angry All the Time and It’s Ruining My Life
Doesn't like the message, yeah. And it may be, I don't know if Cheryl is of like, I don't want to say no faith, but you know, she's a non-believer or just a completely different faith.
The Dr. John Delony Show
I’m Angry All the Time and It’s Ruining My Life
But I think, yeah, is the issue that Cheryl has more of an issue with it.
The Dr. John Delony Show
I’m Angry All the Time and It’s Ruining My Life
Without having to be joyful myself.
The Dr. John Delony Show
I’m Angry All the Time and It’s Ruining My Life
Trying to inject some color into a very drab winter. January is just...
The Dr. John Delony Show
I’m Angry All the Time and It’s Ruining My Life
Well, like yesterday, I had on all black, black shirt, black pants, everything. But I had on hot pink shoes because I was like, dang it. We'll wear some color somewhere.
The Dr. John Delony Show
I’m Angry All the Time and It’s Ruining My Life
Hey, I wanted to point out real quick, and you and I talked about this off air, but if our previous caller is listening, just Google the poem, Welcome to Holland.
The Dr. John Delony Show
I’m Angry All the Time and It’s Ruining My Life
Why is it... Poem, poem. What is it I say weird there?
The Dr. John Delony Show
I’m Angry All the Time and It’s Ruining My Life
A story. Poem. It's a short story called... Poem sounds like a... Poem. Poem. A poem. Is that better?
The Dr. John Delony Show
I’m Angry All the Time and It’s Ruining My Life
Anyway, a short story written by a woman, a special needs parent. It's called Welcome to Holland, and it's just a great story about – this is from a mother's perspective of giving birth and thinking that I'm going to have a quote-unquote typical child. And then you have a special needs child. But it's a great way to think about it of this isn't better or worse. It's just different.
The Dr. John Delony Show
I’m Angry All the Time and It’s Ruining My Life
And now I have to think differently. But to any – I was thinking about that with her. It's a great story to read. The whole idea is you've planned for a trip to Italy. You've got – you've done all the research. You've got all the books. You've done everything you could do. You get on the plane because you're going to Italy. You've planned for it for months.
The Dr. John Delony Show
I’m Angry All the Time and It’s Ruining My Life
You get off, and they say, welcome to Holland. And you're like, wait, what? Yes. So now all of a sudden Holland is beautiful.
The Dr. John Delony Show
I’m Angry All the Time and It’s Ruining My Life
But I'm not in Italy. Right. But I'm here. It's pretty cool. But I have to learn now.
The Dr. John Delony Show
I’m Angry All the Time and It’s Ruining My Life
I didn't plan for any of this, so now I have to learn about it.
The Dr. John Delony Show
I’m Angry All the Time and It’s Ruining My Life
And then the idea is, but the tulips, the whole like thing about it is, but the tulips are pretty in Holland. That's right. Yeah. So it's a great, I mean, story, short story, whatever we're calling it.
The Ramsey Show
The Key to Transformation Is Admitting You Have a Problem
Jade needs to make that a magnet for sure. She's bringing out her inner Dave.
The Ramsey Show
The Key to Transformation Is Admitting You Have a Problem
You know what? So people can see that as soon as they or blimp the fridge because we know they go to the fridge like 5,000 times a day. Amen and amen.
The Ramsey Show
The Key to Transformation Is Admitting You Have a Problem
Well, I am – thank you all for taking my call. I'm 39. My husband is 42. Our household income is $100,000 to $110,000 a year.
The Ramsey Show
The Key to Transformation Is Admitting You Have a Problem
um we've been married for almost 13 years um we um our net worth is around 1.1 hey um but that yeah that does include our house and my husband said that that's really not included he doesn't yes it is we would beg to differ we would beg to differ what what what kind of yeah what if we included the house what would it be No, that is with the house.
The Ramsey Show
The Key to Transformation Is Admitting You Have a Problem
He says that we're not over that because... He wants to see cash money in the bank.
The Ramsey Show
The Key to Transformation Is Admitting You Have a Problem
Just between us. Yes, okay. We do have a $5,000 emergency fund. I have all of our life insurance through Zander, like you all taught me.
The Ramsey Show
The Key to Transformation Is Admitting You Have a Problem
um we are avid dave fans um we've been trying to live by your old rule ever since we got married um and he he's lived by that rule ever since he was like 14 he just said i didn't listen until i started listening to dave so um but i have a i have a couple questions okay we got we got about a minute and a half so you got to get to them real fast
The Ramsey Show
The Key to Transformation Is Admitting You Have a Problem
Okay, I max out our Roth IRA, our 401K, and we contribute about $1,000 to $2,000 to a mutual fund, and then the $7,000 max for each of us for our Roth. I don't feel – where do we go from here? I feel like because we're maxing everything out – You know, what do we do from here? I'm honestly, I'm getting ready to turn 40. I'm a little off. Yeah. And I'm thankful that we don't have any bills.
The Ramsey Show
The Key to Transformation Is Admitting You Have a Problem
But also, too, our mutual funds are only going like 6% to 8%. Okay. I got to let Jay jump in here. Go ahead, Jay.
The Ramsey Show
The Key to Transformation Is Admitting You Have a Problem
Hi. So I need advice on what to do. So we just realized that my mother-in-law had stolen from my husband and I for the second time. The first time was last year that we discovered it. My husband's debit card numbers kept getting stolen even after he changed it six times. Come to find out. It was my mother-in-law. She stole every time he was home.
The Ramsey Show
The Key to Transformation Is Admitting You Have a Problem
She somehow went to his wallet and grabbed his debit card, wrote down the numbers. She used it to pay bills. How much? We tracked $1,000, and then we stopped tracking it. Because you didn't want to keep getting that. No.
The Ramsey Show
The Key to Transformation Is Admitting You Have a Problem
Um, I, I would say four months before we realized it. I actually realized it when I was looking over my husband. Uh, well then we were just, uh, dating or engaged. I can't remember. And he was just showing it to me and I was just like, well, just let me read it. So I looked at it and I said, wait, babe, these are all utility bills. So someone's paying utilities and he's like, Oh, okay.
The Ramsey Show
The Key to Transformation Is Admitting You Have a Problem
So we looked and my husband, like a couple of days later, found a utility bill that was paid with the last four digits of his car in his mom's name. So we confronted her. Well, How'd that go? He confronted her. How'd that go? Not well. Not well. She, unfortunately, is an alcoholic.
The Ramsey Show
The Key to Transformation Is Admitting You Have a Problem
And so it's rough, especially because just under a little over a month ago, we were ready with $5,000 cash to bail her out of her sixth OWI because otherwise her son was going to be hurt. My brother-in-law, who is... now 17 was going to be put in foster care and we were going to be his foster parents up until he turned 18. Oh, wow.
The Ramsey Show
The Key to Transformation Is Admitting You Have a Problem
And so we didn't, we were going to like, okay, we're going to bail you out. We, and we even told her like, this is a gift. We don't want you to return it. Like this is just rough. So she was ordered to not, we even were driving a total of six hours a day. When I say we, I mean me because my husband was working and I would drive an hour to pick her up
The Ramsey Show
The Key to Transformation Is Admitting You Have a Problem
an hour to drop her off from her home to then work and then an hour back. And then I would go back and I would go get her. And we finally stopped after we found out she was driving when she wasn't supposed to. And so we said, we're not going to be complicit in this.
The Ramsey Show
The Key to Transformation Is Admitting You Have a Problem
We're not going to turn you in, but we're not going to be a part, part of our bargain to not asking for any money back was that you didn't break the law again.
The Ramsey Show
The Key to Transformation Is Admitting You Have a Problem
We need help with the current situation of her stealing $13,000 from his UTMA account.
The Ramsey Show
The Key to Transformation Is Admitting You Have a Problem
Yes. She set it up for him. He was in a really bad car accident. So because he was a minor, the money was then dispersed to her. And then at the same time, his parents were going through a divorce. So part of the custody agreement was instead of just giving the money and letting it sit in a bank account, put it in an utmost trust. So she did that.
The Ramsey Show
The Key to Transformation Is Admitting You Have a Problem
And then in 2008, she took out a little over $6,000. And then in 2015, she took out another $6,000. little over six grand, of a total withdrawal of $13,186.43. No, we get it. She's got access to this, though. She did. Yep. So now my husband's 22 and has rights.
The Ramsey Show
The Key to Transformation Is Admitting You Have a Problem
And so when we talked with our accountant and we talked to the investor, she's not, according to like up my IRS stuff or whatever that we are being told is that she can't pull out any money unless it's to benefit the minor. She just did.
The Ramsey Show
The Key to Transformation Is Admitting You Have a Problem
No, no, no, no, no. That was the total amount. It wasn't recently that she did it. She did it in 2008 once and in 2015. We only found out now because the statements are now being mailed to my husband.
The Ramsey Show
The Key to Transformation Is Admitting You Have a Problem
No, what had happened was it was while he was still living there. So we didn't move in together until after we were married. And he lived with his mom. When we found out about it, he did end up getting an apartment for six months. And then we moved in together because we were married. I get it.
The Ramsey Show
The Key to Transformation Is Admitting You Have a Problem
Um, she was court ordered to with the other five OWIs, but it never ended up helping or doing anything. Unfortunately, she did the program enough to get the boys out of foster care when they were removed from her care. And then as soon as she got them back and the court order was finished, she went back to drinking.
The Ramsey Show
The Key to Transformation Is Admitting You Have a Problem
He is still living with mom.
The Ramsey Show
The Key to Transformation Is Admitting You Have a Problem
Hi, thank you for taking my call. My question today is I'm trying to figure out what to do with my credit card debt. I have no other debt other than credit card debt. I fell on hard times with work last year, and I've been having a tough time actually landing a job since then. Still working at it, but it's getting harder in the field that I'm in.
The Ramsey Show
The Key to Transformation Is Admitting You Have a Problem
And I have some business credit cards and some personal credit cards. My business credit cards have been charged off as of last month. My personal credit cards have been current. I've been able to maintain those with the little bit of savings that I've had left with the hopes that I was going to get a job soon, but it hasn't happened yet.
The Ramsey Show
The Key to Transformation Is Admitting You Have a Problem
So I'm wondering what to do with my personal credit as it's getting harder to pay those balances and the minimum payment.
The Ramsey Show
The Key to Transformation Is Admitting You Have a Problem
The personal credit card debt is $36,000 and the business credit cards are $23,000. What kind of business was it? It's an IT consulting business.
The Ramsey Show
The Key to Transformation Is Admitting You Have a Problem
I'm still doing it because that's what I've been doing for many years and just really trying to find something where I can make the money that I was making before I got laid off.
The Ramsey Show
The Key to Transformation Is Admitting You Have a Problem
Okay. Well, my credit card debt racked up really over just maintaining regular monthly bills, which aren't really high. They are roughly about $1,000 per month. Answer Jade's question.
The Ramsey Show
The Key to Transformation Is Admitting You Have a Problem
beforehand i was making about 10 000 a month but you make it about 120 go ahead i was going to say it's not 120 000 because i'm a consultant so it's not consistent throughout the year okay how many months of the year do you make i mean if you say to me hey i make 120 000 a year yeah it can fluctuate but you still made 120 000 in the year um Well, it can go from anywhere.
The Ramsey Show
The Key to Transformation Is Admitting You Have a Problem
You can be unemployed with what I do anywhere from three to six months. If you get a year, then that's nice.
The Ramsey Show
The Key to Transformation Is Admitting You Have a Problem
Well, I did try. And that was another part of it is that it may sound like I'm not trying. I tried to go to restaurants to see if someone would hire me for waitressing, hosting, different things. And why didn't they? What do you think the reason was? I mean, I don't want to really I mean, I don't know what the reason is. Honestly, I don't know. I know why I can't get a job in my field.
The Ramsey Show
The Key to Transformation Is Admitting You Have a Problem
But the reason that I can't get a regular job doing something outside of what I do, I don't know. I mean, I would think anyone can get hired in a restaurant, but apparently not.
The Ramsey Show
The Key to Transformation Is Admitting You Have a Problem
I didn't do anything that was not going to be able to pay my bills. Not really.
The Ramsey Show
The Key to Transformation Is Admitting You Have a Problem
I did have unemployment. That's how I was able to pay my rent. My rent was $2,500 a month.
The Ramsey Show
The Key to Transformation Is Admitting You Have a Problem
I went to, like, five different restaurants. I went to another... I went to a bar. I went to lounges to try to apply for work.
The Ramsey Show
Your Income Is Your Greatest Wealth Building Tool
My question is where would a vasectomy reversal sit in on the baby steps? I've looked into my insurance and my fiance's and neither one covered it. It's going to be about $10,000, and we do have consumer debt. Obviously not working that together at the moment, waiting until we get married, but just kind of wanting to plan. Do we pause that and stock up the money because we want to start a family?
The Ramsey Show
Your Income Is Your Greatest Wealth Building Tool
He's 42, and I'm 33, so I'm a little bit older, too, so we're not wanting to wait.
The Ramsey Show
Your Income Is Your Greatest Wealth Building Tool
Yeah, we're going to wait until we get married.
The Ramsey Show
Your Income Is Your Greatest Wealth Building Tool
That's kind of the plan. I'm a little nervous, just not for the financial aspect, but for the medical risks involved with the procedure. But he's talked to his doctor and is willing and all in. So, yeah, we're going to want to start as soon as possible.
The Ramsey Show
Your Income Is Your Greatest Wealth Building Tool
George, we do make $165,000 combined, so it shouldn't take more than three months.
The Ramsey Show
Your Income Is Your Greatest Wealth Building Tool
Yeah, um... I mean, we can, our finances obviously aren't combined and we are both working them separately. So he has, you know, a second job as well. I am working towards that as well. So, I mean, it's possible that we might be able to knock out a lot of it in the next six months.
The Ramsey Show
Your Income Is Your Greatest Wealth Building Tool
Yeah, it's going to be a small one.
The Ramsey Show
Your Income Is Your Greatest Wealth Building Tool
No, so it would be like an elopement situation where it would be a five-day wedding slash honeymoon and then come back.
The Ramsey Show
Your Income Is Your Greatest Wealth Building Tool
Well, he has to meet with a specialist, a urologist, but he's talked to his general doctor about it, and they see no problems with his age or the reversal, but they want him to go to the urologist to get it scheduled.