Sarah

I was very open and honest about wanting a fun, enthusiastic sex life.

I was really vulnerable and honestly, I was explicit.

And he promised that we could try anything, that he would be into it.

And then we got married and all the handcuffs were taken off and none were put on.

Hi, how are you?

I'm all right.

I've been married to my husband for almost 12 years.

He is kind.

He's faithful.

He's good to me in many ways, but I do not feel desired by him.

I haven't really for our whole relationship.

I don't believe in divorce.

We're committed to staying married, but my love for him is

being drowned out by resentment.

I should deeply resent that he stole any chance I had to not just experience like an uninhibited sex life, but the chance to feel wanted, even in the most basic ways.

And I don't know how to accept a lifetime of not being desired by the one person who's supposed to want me.

Okay.

Yeah, I practiced this little spiel for like 15 times last night to time it, but then the guy said I wasn't supposed to read a script, so I sort of had to edit it down.

I mean, my husband and I have talked very openly about it.

Um, that he, like when he looks at me or thinks about me, he thinks I want to jump her bones.