Welcome back to another episode of The Viall Files: Ask Nick Edition! Our first caller is struggling to get over her best friend’s affair with their boss. Our second caller is being pressured to make a very personal choice. And, our third caller’s brother-in-law needs an intervention. “You should care. This is going to hurt her.” Listen to Humble Brag with Cynthia Bailey and Crystal Kung Minkoff every Monday starting October 21st! Available wherever you get your podcasts and YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@humblebragpod https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/humble-brag-with-crystal-and-cynthia/id1774286896 https://open.spotify.com/show/4NWA8LBk15l2u5tNQqDcOO?si=c03a23d537f94735 Start your 7 Day Free Trial of Viall Files + here: https://viallfiles.supportingcast.fm/ Please make sure to subscribe so you don’t miss an episode and as always send in your relationship questions to [email protected] to be a part of our Monday episodes. To Order Nick’s Book Go To: https://www.viallfiles.com If you would like to get some texting advice, send an email to [email protected] with “Texting Office Hours” in the subject line! To advertise on the show, contact [email protected] or visit https://www.advertisecast.com/TheViallFiles THANK YOU TO OUR SPONSORS: Quip - Get 20% off sitewide and a FREE travel case and countertop stand at https://getquip.com/nick BetterHelp - Visit https://betterhelp.com/viall today to get 10% off your first month. DraftKings - Download the DraftKings Sportsbook app and use code VIALL for new customers to get $200 in bonus bets instantly when you bet just five bucks. Dailylook - It’s time to get your own personal stylist with DailyLook. Head to https://DailyLook.com to take your style quiz and use code VIALL for 50% off your first order. Caraway - Visit https://carawayhome.com/viall10 to see all of our favorite products AND see the current discount. Cymbiotika - Go to https://cymbiotika.com/viall for 20% off your order + free shipping today Episode Socials: @viallfiles @nickviall @justinkaphillips @dereklanerussell
Chapter 1: What should I do about my best friend's affair?
I'm sure. I don't really... Okay.
Yeah.
but I think you should respect your partner.
She'd love you for saying that. She's like, maybe you should go on, and I want to know what he's got to say. I'm like, he's not going to just side with me because I'm the caller.
Well, why do you think, I mean, do you want to go there or not?
Sure.
How upset do you think your partner is going to be?
We've talked a lot about this this morning. Honestly, I think she's most upset that she kept saying, I'm so sad that I took this opportunity away from you. I know how much you love this podcast. And like, I honestly think she felt guilty more than anything.
Because she told you, you can't do it.
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Chapter 2: How can I cope with feeling betrayed by a friend?
I don't really want to go into the specifics of it, but basically like he's trying to figure out where to live his life and how to live his life so that he can heal. Um, so his immediate plan was to try to move somewhere different, um, which might help him or just be more exciting to him. He's kind of a flighty person. He's always moved from place to place. He's avoided relationships.
How significant is his health concern in terms of, not to get all morbid, but are we talking a fatal life condition or is this something he's just going to have to live with and he has every reason to expect he can live a full life despite this thing he's dealing with?
it is unclear um it doesn't seem to be like fatal in the immediate term um but it definitely impedes a lot of what he's able to do on a daily basis they're kind of still it's a fairly new thing and they're looking for solutions to it but it's not not really clear right now okay and why can't he be the dad he wants to be Yeah, so I think it's a mixture of he can't and he doesn't want to be.
To be honest, like he can't provide financially, which is okay. Like I have a job and I also have a strong support system who will be able to support me physically, financially and emotionally if need be. And the other thing is he feels like raising a baby, like with all of the exhaustion that goes with it and like the commitment.
will be a detriment to him like a part of this is extreme fatigue and he can get exhausted like very easily just from a conversation with someone so he is worried about that aspect of it even though I'm not asking him to like stay up nights and like take care of the crying baby I'm kind of like he has enough energy to have sex that's a fair point yeah he does
I mean, where does mom come into this equation where she feels like she has an opinion on what you should do with your body?
So she came in kind of after I told him that I've made a decision and I would really like appreciate it if he would stop pressuring me so I can focus on reducing my stress. Yeah. She reached out to me the next day and asked if she could talk to me. And then we had like an hour and a half long conversation where she said some really diabolical stuff.
um like what that this is like extremely cruel and selfish and i would just be if i had this baby i would just be like shattering so many lives like pieces of broken glass and that is a crazy thing to say uh they also both have implied that i am at fault for getting myself pregnant and of course you know well yeah of course yeah yeah
And that I it's really fucked up that I didn't sit him down and tell him that I probably wouldn't want to have an abortion if I got pregnant unexpectedly. Like that is a huge thing that they both keep bringing up.
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