Jordan Klepper
Appearances
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Republicans Desperately Spin Yemen Group Chat Fumble | Mayor Michelle Wu
I love this kid. Ora Khan deserves these endorsement deals because he's done the impossible. He put McNeese on the map. Before Khan, I thought McNeese was the name of the third Culkin brother. Now, now I know it's the best school in the state of... I want to say McNeese. I don't know.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Republicans Desperately Spin Yemen Group Chat Fumble | Mayor Michelle Wu
I'm about to blow my brain down over there.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Republicans Desperately Spin Yemen Group Chat Fumble | Mayor Michelle Wu
Anyway. Moving on. From the balls on the court to balls off the court. Away from the basketball arenas, a different kind of March Madness is underway.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Republicans Desperately Spin Yemen Group Chat Fumble | Mayor Michelle Wu
Okay. Look, much like your penis, your argument is completely mangled. Look, these vasectomies are a disaster. If people are having vasectomies, they aren't having kids. If people aren't having kids, then those kids aren't playing sports. And if they're not playing sports, then I can't bet on their Little League games.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Republicans Desperately Spin Yemen Group Chat Fumble | Mayor Michelle Wu
Now I look like a psycho betting on Little League games when there's no children on the field. I'm not a psycho, Ronnie. I just need little Arlo to bat over 500 so Daddy can get back to even. Which brings me to my ball buster bet of the night. Will the Bakersfield Junior Astros score more than 22 runs in the Pee Wee quarterfinals? Brought to you by gambling. It's like a vasectomy for your wallet.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Republicans Desperately Spin Yemen Group Chat Fumble | Mayor Michelle Wu
That's it. That's all the time we have. Join us next week when we debate whether Vanessa Trump would look better with Tiger Woods or Tony the Tiger. Okay, it's hard to say, Jordan. Tony the Tiger is a massive dog.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Republicans Desperately Spin Yemen Group Chat Fumble | Mayor Michelle Wu
He's naked. He's naked.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Republicans Desperately Spin Yemen Group Chat Fumble | Mayor Michelle Wu
Somebody made a mistake and it happens. Yeah, look, it's a mistake and we gotta move on.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Republicans Desperately Spin Yemen Group Chat Fumble | Mayor Michelle Wu
What's up, numbnuts? I'm Ronny Chieng. And I'm Jordan Klepper. This is Sports War, the show where we are legally not allowed to agree with each other. For example, if I say that athletes should be allowed to take steroids to get bigger... Then I say that athletes should be getting smaller.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Republicans Desperately Spin Yemen Group Chat Fumble | Mayor Michelle Wu
Come on, how would they even pick up a basketball?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Republicans Desperately Spin Yemen Group Chat Fumble | Mayor Michelle Wu
I watched your Marvel movie. What was it called? Right. Nobody remembers. Oh, really? Well, how many Marvel movies were you in? I'm more of a theater guy. Thank you very much. Ibsen or something like that. Anyway, let's start things off with March Madness, the time of year when people yell Gonzaga, and not just during orgasm. But this year, the Ides of March didn't bring much of the madness.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Republicans Desperately Spin Yemen Group Chat Fumble | Mayor Michelle Wu
Okay, we get it. Sucks!
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Republicans Desperately Spin Yemen Group Chat Fumble | Mayor Michelle Wu
Ronnie... I can't tell which is more busted, your bracket or your face. Look, this has been an incredible tournament. I only want to watch major colleges, not some team like Mount Sinai Bum getting shellacked by a top dog in the Sweet 16. Honestly, this is the most excited I've been for a Sweet 16 since Ronnie's quinceañera.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Republicans Desperately Spin Yemen Group Chat Fumble | Mayor Michelle Wu
Wow. That layover in Madrid did some wonders, Ronnie. Which brings us to our super sweet 16, bed of the night. Which college mascot will be the first to do over the pants stuff at the sweet 16? As always, brought to you by gambling. It's the fun way to sell your house.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Defies Court Order & Deports Migrants, Lewis Black vs. Air Travel | Ezra Klein & Derek Thompson
Tren de Aragua. Tren de Aragua. Tren de Aragua. You know the members of that gang are like, is that us she's talking about? Trump sounds like my grandfather ordering Chipotle. I'll take the Barbaracoa! Buenos Nachos! And over the weekend, Trump announced he was deporting hundreds of these suspected Venezuelan gang members all the way back to El Salvador. So... Close enough.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Defies Court Order & Deports Migrants, Lewis Black vs. Air Travel | Ezra Klein & Derek Thompson
Louis Black, everyone. We come back as we play.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Defies Court Order & Deports Migrants, Lewis Black vs. Air Travel | Ezra Klein & Derek Thompson
Welcome back to The Daily Show. My guests tonight are journalists and co-authors of the new book Abundance. Please welcome New York Times Opinion columnist Ezra Klein and staff writer for The Atlantic, Derek Thompson. Meine Damen und Herren, ihr lest ein Buch über ein optimistisches Zukunft, über die Reform der amerikanischen Institutionen. Warum geht es um Sci-Fi?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Defies Court Order & Deports Migrants, Lewis Black vs. Air Travel | Ezra Klein & Derek Thompson
You cribbed that sentence. Yes, absolutely.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Defies Court Order & Deports Migrants, Lewis Black vs. Air Travel | Ezra Klein & Derek Thompson
Das Buch ist für die Linke geschrieben. Es ist ein Kredo, worauf wir uns freuen sollten. Was ist diese Idee von Abundanz? Was sprechen wir hier im Allgemeinen?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Defies Court Order & Deports Migrants, Lewis Black vs. Air Travel | Ezra Klein & Derek Thompson
Ja. Maybe I want to tweak that optimistic look at the future. You speak about this. You talk a lot about the regulations in places like California, in places like New York. Is the answer to make California look more like Texas? Is that what we're talking about?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Defies Court Order & Deports Migrants, Lewis Black vs. Air Travel | Ezra Klein & Derek Thompson
And of course, these suspected gang members would be afforded a rigorous legal procedure, including a trial, the presentation of evidence and all the rights of due process. I'm just f***ing with you. He did it, Trump.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Defies Court Order & Deports Migrants, Lewis Black vs. Air Travel | Ezra Klein & Derek Thompson
We're building an argument for building, for coming together. Obviously you're writing this book before this past election. And there's times where I'm hearing about this vision of if we can get people together to get on the same page. We can fix big issues like the housing crisis, like the environment. It feels like we're talking about like we can make this Titanic run beautifully.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Defies Court Order & Deports Migrants, Lewis Black vs. Air Travel | Ezra Klein & Derek Thompson
But then the election hits and we hit the iceberg. So how much of this is still applicable to a democratic movement that feels very hobbled right now?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Defies Court Order & Deports Migrants, Lewis Black vs. Air Travel | Ezra Klein & Derek Thompson
Das ist... Ezra, das ist das Problem mit Liberalen heute. Sie schauen eine Comedy-Show und denken, soll ich lachen? Soll ich darüber nachdenken? Wie fühle ich mich? Lass mich ein paar Fokusgruppen machen. Wie fühlst du dich, Ezra? Ich habe mich in den letzten Wochen enttäuscht.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Defies Court Order & Deports Migrants, Lewis Black vs. Air Travel | Ezra Klein & Derek Thompson
Now, it's interesting you talk about messaging. I get to the end of the book and you bring up Operation Warp Speed. And I'm like, oh, I forgot about Operation Warp Speed. So did everybody else.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Defies Court Order & Deports Migrants, Lewis Black vs. Air Travel | Ezra Klein & Derek Thompson
Last used to round up Japanese Americans during World War II. Why does Trump always have to pick the oldest, most racist laws to do what he wants to do? Cutting taxes under the authority of the It's Okay to Drown Italians Law of 1863. It's not just that it's archaic. Invoking that law has some big problems.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Defies Court Order & Deports Migrants, Lewis Black vs. Air Travel | Ezra Klein & Derek Thompson
But you're talking about long-term visions. You mentioned having this lens of abundance. It's sort of what you're proposing here. But I think you go out and you talk to people and we are the politics of short-term results. Everything is about what can you get me now. We're not even thinking about the giant medical miracle of Operation Warp Speed from a few years ago.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Defies Court Order & Deports Migrants, Lewis Black vs. Air Travel | Ezra Klein & Derek Thompson
How does something like this resonate with folks who are on their phones, they're flipping through, they want an answer right now, they want to be angry right now, they want action right now. How do you speak to a grander idea when it feels like the world is moving faster than
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Defies Court Order & Deports Migrants, Lewis Black vs. Air Travel | Ezra Klein & Derek Thompson
In looking at the democratic field right now, Democrats, I think, are hearing this message and then they're saying, maybe we should go on more podcasts. It feels like they're taking baby steps to this. Who is carrying this message? Who do you see as somebody... We come out here and we talk to audiences in between acts.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Defies Court Order & Deports Migrants, Lewis Black vs. Air Travel | Ezra Klein & Derek Thompson
And more often than not, people are desperate for an answer, whether that looks like resistance or whether that looks like a vision of the future that they can get behind. And we're desperately missing some of those voices out there. Do you see this message being carried by anybody articulately?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Defies Court Order & Deports Migrants, Lewis Black vs. Air Travel | Ezra Klein & Derek Thompson
Das fühlt sich leise an. Wow, ja. Just to take a picture of war and peace. The second part. We'll just do the second part.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Defies Court Order & Deports Migrants, Lewis Black vs. Air Travel | Ezra Klein & Derek Thompson
One is that if you're deporting gang members but there's no due process, then you don't really know if you're deporting gang members. You're just deporting people who you think look like gang members. And if you start deporting every shady looking guy with questionable tattoos, I mean, who's gonna go to Jets games? But... You know what?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Defies Court Order & Deports Migrants, Lewis Black vs. Air Travel | Ezra Klein & Derek Thompson
You can make a weekly television show about it.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Defies Court Order & Deports Migrants, Lewis Black vs. Air Travel | Ezra Klein & Derek Thompson
Well, it's a fascinating read. Abundance is available now and also check out the Ezra Klein Show and Derek's Plain English Podcast. Ezra Klein and Derek Thompson. We'll take a quick break. That's our show for tonight. Now here it is.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Defies Court Order & Deports Migrants, Lewis Black vs. Air Travel | Ezra Klein & Derek Thompson
I'm sure Donald Trump has the cultural understanding to carefully discern who is a member of... What's that gang name again? Trendy Uruguay. Yeah, yeah, you guys are f***ed. There's another problem with invoking this law, which is, it's supposed to be used in wartime. So, to make this work, Trump had to pretend that we're at war with Venezuela, which we're not.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Defies Court Order & Deports Migrants, Lewis Black vs. Air Travel | Ezra Klein & Derek Thompson
Not to mention, a pretend war is an extremely complicated concept to throw at the Secretary of Defense on St. Patrick's Day. So, man... Okay, so, bottom line, bottom line here. Okay, there's a lot of legal questions up in the air. So, on Saturday, a federal judge decided to pump the brakes.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Defies Court Order & Deports Migrants, Lewis Black vs. Air Travel | Ezra Klein & Derek Thompson
Well, it was a good try, Donald, but the judge has ruled and that's the way the system works. So, Trump brought the Venezuelans back, gave them due process, did the whole constitution thing. I'm f***ing with you again! He ignored the judge.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Defies Court Order & Deports Migrants, Lewis Black vs. Air Travel | Ezra Klein & Derek Thompson
My God. I mean, if you had told me that Donald Trump would trigger a constitutional crisis just seven weeks into his term, I would have said, that is a lot later than I thought. I mean... Donald showed a lot of restraint. I mean, Trump's really becoming presidential. Of course, the administration didn't just come out and say, we don't listen to judges from now on.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Defies Court Order & Deports Migrants, Lewis Black vs. Air Travel | Ezra Klein & Derek Thompson
They had the respect for the judicial branch to come up with some bullshit.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Defies Court Order & Deports Migrants, Lewis Black vs. Air Travel | Ezra Klein & Derek Thompson
It didn't count. Is that how rulings work? You have to put it in writing, you can't just say it? Well, this is definitely not the first time that Trump has defended himself by arguing that oral doesn't count. Look it up. Look it up. Look, the judge wasn't terribly impressed with that argument, so Trump's lawyers went with another response, which was, can't catch me, force field!
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Defies Court Order & Deports Migrants, Lewis Black vs. Air Travel | Ezra Klein & Derek Thompson
Yes, okay, apparently the constitution is not in effect over international waters. That explains Carnival Cruise Line's new ship, the SS Cruel and Unusual Punishment. And while the Trump administration is saying that it has the right to ignore judicial orders, President Trump himself is somehow going even further.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Defies Court Order & Deports Migrants, Lewis Black vs. Air Travel | Ezra Klein & Derek Thompson
So, there you have it. Donald Trump went from, oh sorry, we would have listened to this judge if we had heard it in time, to actually, this lunatic judge should be impeached. And if you would have told me that that all happened in 48 hours, I would have said, wow, again, longer than I expected. Now, some of you might be thinking, Jordan, Jordan, Jordan! Enough about this constitutional crisis.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Defies Court Order & Deports Migrants, Lewis Black vs. Air Travel | Ezra Klein & Derek Thompson
I want to hear about another constitutional crisis. Well,
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Defies Court Order & Deports Migrants, Lewis Black vs. Air Travel | Ezra Klein & Derek Thompson
It's not enough that he's fighting the judicial branch in the present. He's also fighting the executive branch in the past. He's causing more problems in the multiverse than Jonathan Majors. Yes, I guess Donald Trump just found out about Autopens, which leads us to one of the most annoying events in a Trump presidency. Donald learns about something new, so we all have to learn about it too.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Defies Court Order & Deports Migrants, Lewis Black vs. Air Travel | Ezra Klein & Derek Thompson
Thomas Jefferson? Ich meine, ich glaube, das macht Sinn. Wenn man so viele geheimen Kinder hat, sind das viele Geburtstagskarten, die man signen muss. Busy man. Nun, um es Trump recht zu sagen, sagt er nicht nur, dass Joe Biden ein Autopenn benutzt hat. Es ist etwas viel sinnigeres.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Defies Court Order & Deports Migrants, Lewis Black vs. Air Travel | Ezra Klein & Derek Thompson
Eine Verschwörung, die so dreckig war, dass Trump sich Zeit aus seinem berühmten Zeitraum, auf dem er auf dem Flughafen wartet, um zu diskutieren.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Defies Court Order & Deports Migrants, Lewis Black vs. Air Travel | Ezra Klein & Derek Thompson
Yes, good question. Did Joe Biden really sign the pardons that he said several times he signed? Or did a radical left lunatic sneak into the Oval Office and start signing whatever was in the room? Pardons, laws, doctor's notes, yearbooks. I mean, did Joe Biden really want Cindy to have a great summer or was it the deep state?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Defies Court Order & Deports Migrants, Lewis Black vs. Air Travel | Ezra Klein & Derek Thompson
My favorite part of this whole story is how Trump tried to claim that he would never use an Autopen, only to remember that he actually did use an Autopen.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Defies Court Order & Deports Migrants, Lewis Black vs. Air Travel | Ezra Klein & Derek Thompson
If I'm doing important things like pardoning January Sixers, I'll sign it myself. But for doing stupid shit like writing letters to sick kids, DocuSign is fine. Either way, Trump basically just admitted that he doesn't personally sign any of the get well letters he sends to young people who aren't feeling well. Now, obviously that's not the important part of this story.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Defies Court Order & Deports Migrants, Lewis Black vs. Air Travel | Ezra Klein & Derek Thompson
What's important is the danger that... Excuse me, Jordan. Jordan. Oh, Troy Iwata, everybody.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Defies Court Order & Deports Migrants, Lewis Black vs. Air Travel | Ezra Klein & Derek Thompson
So, let's get right into it. Now one of Trump's big promises for his second term was deporting violent immigrants from America. And he often mentioned one violent gang in particular.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Defies Court Order & Deports Migrants, Lewis Black vs. Air Travel | Ezra Klein & Derek Thompson
There he goes, that was the last one. Okay. Are we sure it was their broken hearts? It wasn't whatever medical condition they were dealing with?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Defies Court Order & Deports Migrants, Lewis Black vs. Air Travel | Ezra Klein & Derek Thompson
Okay, look... Troy, Troy, I don't get this. Trump has been so cruel to sick kids. He's cut cancer research and medical services. He's threatening their health insurance. I mean, what do they love so much about Trump?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Defies Court Order & Deports Migrants, Lewis Black vs. Air Travel | Ezra Klein & Derek Thompson
It's a real tragedy. It is. You're right, you're right. I mean, I don't... I don't know how their families are gonna live with this.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Defies Court Order & Deports Migrants, Lewis Black vs. Air Travel | Ezra Klein & Derek Thompson
Oh, shit. Everyone's dead. Everyone's dead. Tragic stuff. Troy, you wanna, everyone? When we come back, Louis Black is grounded. So, stick around.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump's Tariff Boredom, Hegseth Goes Diet Woke, Sports War: Super Bowl | Jesse Eisenberg
I am, Ronny Chieng. I'm Jordan Klepper. This is Sports War, the show where we are legally not allowed to agree with each other. So if I say the Super Bowl should have fewer commercials... Then I say all the players should be dressed like Flo from Progressive. Oh, come on. No one wants to see Travis Kelsey in an apron. Yeah, tell that to my Pornhub search history, Ronny.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump's Tariff Boredom, Hegseth Goes Diet Woke, Sports War: Super Bowl | Jesse Eisenberg
Now, Sunday officially marked the end of the football season. We laughed. We cried. Ronnie tried to kiss me after every touchdown. And we crowned the Philadelphia Eagles our new champions.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump's Tariff Boredom, Hegseth Goes Diet Woke, Sports War: Super Bowl | Jesse Eisenberg
That was the worst Super Bowl in history. The Eagles dominated the entire evening. And just like Ronnie, after eating dairy, the Chiefs shit the bed. You know what? I think I speak for everyone when I say no more Super Bowls. NFL, you had a good run. You ended racism, cured breast cancer, and found a woman under 30 who wants to see Bill Belichick naked.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump's Tariff Boredom, Hegseth Goes Diet Woke, Sports War: Super Bowl | Jesse Eisenberg
You look like Ronnie out there, completely lost with the terrible haircuts. The Chiefs were my ticket out of this hellhole. And now I owe a lot of money to a very, very bad man.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump's Tariff Boredom, Hegseth Goes Diet Woke, Sports War: Super Bowl | Jesse Eisenberg
Now, while Philly dominated the big game, it's important to remember, the Chiefs weren't the only ones getting dragged all over the field on Sunday.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump's Tariff Boredom, Hegseth Goes Diet Woke, Sports War: Super Bowl | Jesse Eisenberg
I've had it with these motherfucking Drakes on this motherfucking plane! Hey, Kendrick, the world's on fire, the president's in the stands, and you're using the biggest stage on the planet to go after Drake again? We get it. You don't like him. Save your petty beef for the group chat. Like Ronnie's fake accent, you're overdoing it.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump's Tariff Boredom, Hegseth Goes Diet Woke, Sports War: Super Bowl | Jesse Eisenberg
And finally, let's not forget about a huge update rocking the world of gambling.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump's Tariff Boredom, Hegseth Goes Diet Woke, Sports War: Super Bowl | Jesse Eisenberg
It's with a C, you dipshit. And you keep my mother's maiden name out of your mouth. See, this is my point. Gambling shouldn't be about hurting the people closest to you. Whatever happened to doing it the old-fashioned way? Making dogs fight each other. As someone who had their identity stolen by a certain Japanese coworker, this is a disgrace.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump's Tariff Boredom, Hegseth Goes Diet Woke, Sports War: Super Bowl | Jesse Eisenberg
Well, I know you can't be talking about me because I'm Malaysian. Oh. Stop making up new types of Asians. It's offensive. Which brings us to my Jordan's big dinger, bed of the night. Which Malaysian celebrity will go to jail next for Otani's gambling? As always, brought to you by gambling. Gambling. It got Pete Rose into heaven. Why not you? Well, that's all the time we have for Sports War.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump's Tariff Boredom, Hegseth Goes Diet Woke, Sports War: Super Bowl | Jesse Eisenberg
52 makes the most sense.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump's Tariff Boredom, Hegseth Goes Diet Woke, Sports War: Super Bowl | Jesse Eisenberg
Welcome to the Daily Show. I'm Jordan Klepper. We've got so much to talk about tonight. Donald Trump is reaching across the prison yard aisle. The military gets half-woke. And we'll tell you how New York's mayor stays smooth as a dolphin. But first, let's get into another installment of the second coming of Donald J. Trump. Donald Trump has been imposing a lot of tariffs since he took office.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump's Tariff Boredom, Hegseth Goes Diet Woke, Sports War: Super Bowl | Jesse Eisenberg
Welcome back to The Daily Show. My guest tonight is an Academy Award-nominated actor who wrote, directed, and stars in the Oscar-nominated film A Real Pain. Please welcome Jesse Eisenberg. Beloved, Jesse.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump's Tariff Boredom, Hegseth Goes Diet Woke, Sports War: Super Bowl | Jesse Eisenberg
No, no, no, no.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump's Tariff Boredom, Hegseth Goes Diet Woke, Sports War: Super Bowl | Jesse Eisenberg
That's respect right there, right?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump's Tariff Boredom, Hegseth Goes Diet Woke, Sports War: Super Bowl | Jesse Eisenberg
This is what a career in the arts gets you in America.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump's Tariff Boredom, Hegseth Goes Diet Woke, Sports War: Super Bowl | Jesse Eisenberg
God bless you. The movie is great. Thank you, thank you. Were you thinking like, oh... Thank you. Were you thinking, oh, I'm going to do a Holocaust film, but with humor? Were you like, oh, that trope again?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump's Tariff Boredom, Hegseth Goes Diet Woke, Sports War: Super Bowl | Jesse Eisenberg
Well, this film really dissects grief and how we deal with grief, how we internalize it. But it also places grief next to historical grief.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump's Tariff Boredom, Hegseth Goes Diet Woke, Sports War: Super Bowl | Jesse Eisenberg
Is that something you were grappling with early on in the writing process? Is that sort of the nugget you wanted to unpack?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump's Tariff Boredom, Hegseth Goes Diet Woke, Sports War: Super Bowl | Jesse Eisenberg
And so after going through this process, you still have that lack of meaning and clarity.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump's Tariff Boredom, Hegseth Goes Diet Woke, Sports War: Super Bowl | Jesse Eisenberg
Yeah. Is that what your next film will be about? Like, ambition and the emptiness there and the confusion you have? Exactly, exactly, exactly. It's called The Abyss. The Abyss? Yeah. Oh, I got bad news for you. That movie might exist. Does it really?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump's Tariff Boredom, Hegseth Goes Diet Woke, Sports War: Super Bowl | Jesse Eisenberg
Yeah, make something completely different. I really, I love this. I want to talk about a scene. I don't think it's a spoiler. Okay. There's a scene in this movie where Kieran Culkin is a complicated, difficult person. And he says goodbye to the tour guide after some time with this tour guide.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump's Tariff Boredom, Hegseth Goes Diet Woke, Sports War: Super Bowl | Jesse Eisenberg
And there's this beautiful scene where the tour guide sort of explains to him how meaningful he was, even though he was so difficult. And then he says goodbye to you in a heartbeat and walks away. And we left. I was in the theater. Everybody laughed. It was a very funny moment. And I talked with my wife about this afterwards. I was like... who do I want to be in this moment? I'm curious.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump's Tariff Boredom, Hegseth Goes Diet Woke, Sports War: Super Bowl | Jesse Eisenberg
There is this character who is complicated, but consequential, and in a lot of pain. And this other character who lacks consequence in other people's lives, but in some ways, less pain. It's stable. It's somewhat stable. Yeah, exactly. When you are writing that and working through that, like, where do you project yourself in? Who should I be in that situation?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump's Tariff Boredom, Hegseth Goes Diet Woke, Sports War: Super Bowl | Jesse Eisenberg
And if the nature and scope of these tariffs confuses you, don't worry. You're not the only one.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump's Tariff Boredom, Hegseth Goes Diet Woke, Sports War: Super Bowl | Jesse Eisenberg
Yeah, I mean, when you originally were conceiving this, you imagined yourself playing the other character, correct?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump's Tariff Boredom, Hegseth Goes Diet Woke, Sports War: Super Bowl | Jesse Eisenberg
Yeah, and so you find yourself flipped and playing this character. How would this movie be different if you had flipped? Would you be happier?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump's Tariff Boredom, Hegseth Goes Diet Woke, Sports War: Super Bowl | Jesse Eisenberg
Yeah. But you're also wearing, you're a director, writer, and actor there. Yes. You feel like somebody who's thinking through every moment there.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump's Tariff Boredom, Hegseth Goes Diet Woke, Sports War: Super Bowl | Jesse Eisenberg
And do you see that as, like, part of his genius, or is he just sort of being a dick to you and unprofessional?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump's Tariff Boredom, Hegseth Goes Diet Woke, Sports War: Super Bowl | Jesse Eisenberg
Are you open? Is there improv in a process like this? Does it start with open space to, like, find and discover, as somebody who wrote this and sat with this for quite some time?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump's Tariff Boredom, Hegseth Goes Diet Woke, Sports War: Super Bowl | Jesse Eisenberg
No, but I just... You weren't doing a Holocaust movie, right? You know what I mean? Well, we got some, you know, we got some pretty risque suggestions back in the day.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump's Tariff Boredom, Hegseth Goes Diet Woke, Sports War: Super Bowl | Jesse Eisenberg
Give us a location. Okay, well, maybe a new location. Yeah, exactly, okay. Well, no, so with this- It feels like Kieran is a, if not an improviser, is loose in his performance style.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump's Tariff Boredom, Hegseth Goes Diet Woke, Sports War: Super Bowl | Jesse Eisenberg
Oh. This film is very thoughtful, a lot of very deliberate choices. One choice I was curious about. You, throughout the film, are wearing a shirt that you button, one button. That's right. Not at the top, but the second button, and none of the bottom buttons beyond that. That's right. What is that choice all about?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump's Tariff Boredom, Hegseth Goes Diet Woke, Sports War: Super Bowl | Jesse Eisenberg
I need to watch these things closer. You've sat in this movie. You've created this film. It's now out in the world. People really enjoy it, so much so that you have Academy Award nominations. Yeah. I like you for that. Thank you so much. With that comes promotion for Academy Award nominations. So you're on shows like this. You're doing all of this publicity tour.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump's Tariff Boredom, Hegseth Goes Diet Woke, Sports War: Super Bowl | Jesse Eisenberg
How does that sit with someone like you? Do you like doing publicity for a movie like this?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump's Tariff Boredom, Hegseth Goes Diet Woke, Sports War: Super Bowl | Jesse Eisenberg
Stick on this one.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump's Tariff Boredom, Hegseth Goes Diet Woke, Sports War: Super Bowl | Jesse Eisenberg
It's about time. It's a truly remarkable film, and it feels like an adult film about grief that has so many entrance points for people who are sitting with these conversations in their own hands. So thank you for making that.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump's Tariff Boredom, Hegseth Goes Diet Woke, Sports War: Super Bowl | Jesse Eisenberg
A Real Pain is in theaters streaming now on Hulu. Jesse Eisenberg. We're going to take a quick break. Right back after this. Thank you so much. Jesse Eisenberg. That's our show for tonight. Now, here it is, your moment of zen.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump's Tariff Boredom, Hegseth Goes Diet Woke, Sports War: Super Bowl | Jesse Eisenberg
Do you understand what that means? I mean, why don't you tell me, President of the United States, what this means? Explain ad valorem to me like I was a child. This is Trump's own policy, and he's so bored by it. And you can tell, because at one point, he gets so bored, he just starts peeking into a random folder on the desk. Like, what's in here? Candy? Picture of boobs? What do we got?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump's Tariff Boredom, Hegseth Goes Diet Woke, Sports War: Super Bowl | Jesse Eisenberg
Oh, oh, oh, just more falters. Why is this guy still talking? Trump's not the only one making moves. Yesterday, there was a big announcement from Secretary of Defense Pete Hegseth, Trump's top cabinet member, if you go by blood alcohol level. Now, Hegseth got the gig by promising to go to war against woke, and yesterday, he won another decisive battle.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump's Tariff Boredom, Hegseth Goes Diet Woke, Sports War: Super Bowl | Jesse Eisenberg
Yeah, suck it, libs! You didn't want this military base to honor a traitor to America? Too bad. Woke is dead, and Confederate General Braxton Bragg is alive.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump's Tariff Boredom, Hegseth Goes Diet Woke, Sports War: Super Bowl | Jesse Eisenberg
You renamed Fort Bragg after a different Bragg? So after all that bitching about not giving in to woke history, you're basically admitting that we shouldn't name military bases after Confederate generals. Well, it's a good thing woke is over because I think I can say this now. That's a pussy move, Hank Sandler. Just to be totally clear, Roland Bragg is not a famous figure in military history.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump's Tariff Boredom, Hegseth Goes Diet Woke, Sports War: Super Bowl | Jesse Eisenberg
He's just someone who worked for this weird name switcheroo idea. Pete Hanks has basically said, find me a guy named Bragg who served in the army and didn't own slaves. I mean, he didn't even have a Wikipedia entry until today. Today, today, do you know how obscure you have to be to not even have a Wikipedia page? There's a Wikipedia page for cats that look like Hitler.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump's Tariff Boredom, Hegseth Goes Diet Woke, Sports War: Super Bowl | Jesse Eisenberg
Hegseth, look, I say either commit to honoring a Confederate general or don't. But trying to find some kind of name loophole is just silly. I mean, why do I get the feeling Pete's going to try to pull this with his wife? Baby, baby, I didn't cheat on you. Her name was also Susan, okay? I'm restoring greatness to our marriage.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump's Tariff Boredom, Hegseth Goes Diet Woke, Sports War: Super Bowl | Jesse Eisenberg
Now, with all this tariff imposing and Fort renaming, you might be wondering, is there anyone who's benefiting from Trump's actions? Yes.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump's Tariff Boredom, Hegseth Goes Diet Woke, Sports War: Super Bowl | Jesse Eisenberg
Curious. What was it about Adam's case that convinced Trump to drop the charges?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump's Tariff Boredom, Hegseth Goes Diet Woke, Sports War: Super Bowl | Jesse Eisenberg
Oh, God. Trump really loves getting his ass kissed, doesn't he? This probably explains why all his suit pants have that little trap door on the butt like old-timey long underwear. Now, to be fair... Now, to be fair, the Justice Department didn't say they let Adams off because he kissed Trump's ass. They had an even dumber reason.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump's Tariff Boredom, Hegseth Goes Diet Woke, Sports War: Super Bowl | Jesse Eisenberg
Yes, yes, of course. Trump didn't drop the charges so he could hold them over him for the rest of his term. Trump did it so Adams could focus on enforcing Trump's immigration policies. And now that Adams has the time, I'm sure he's bringing a new laser focus to the job.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump's Tariff Boredom, Hegseth Goes Diet Woke, Sports War: Super Bowl | Jesse Eisenberg
You don't have to do an interview right now. I mean, should we go? This feels like a private moment for you. I mean, I thought I wanted more transparency in my government, but now I'm thinking, perhaps some secrecy is for the best.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump's Tariff Boredom, Hegseth Goes Diet Woke, Sports War: Super Bowl | Jesse Eisenberg
So while Eric Adams might waste his workday getting pampered at local businesses, we're doing the hard work to get to the bottom of this story, starting with our very own Grace Kulenschmidt. Grace. Grace, what's the latest?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump's Tariff Boredom, Hegseth Goes Diet Woke, Sports War: Super Bowl | Jesse Eisenberg
I'm sorry. Grace, are you getting your hair done when you should be working?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump's Tariff Boredom, Hegseth Goes Diet Woke, Sports War: Super Bowl | Jesse Eisenberg
Okay, yeah, I guess. It just doesn't seem very professional.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump's Tariff Boredom, Hegseth Goes Diet Woke, Sports War: Super Bowl | Jesse Eisenberg
Okay, I mean, I am due for a balayage. I mean, let's get more analysis now from Troy Iwata. Troy, come on. I mean, come on. Troy, what's going on?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump's Tariff Boredom, Hegseth Goes Diet Woke, Sports War: Super Bowl | Jesse Eisenberg
I'm sorry.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump's Tariff Boredom, Hegseth Goes Diet Woke, Sports War: Super Bowl | Jesse Eisenberg
Okay, forget it. Let's go to Michael Kosta. Michael, look. Okay, good. Thank you. I'm glad someone's taking this seriously. What's your take on the Adams situation?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump's Tariff Boredom, Hegseth Goes Diet Woke, Sports War: Super Bowl | Jesse Eisenberg
Woo! Jordan? Michael, can you please not get your anus waxed during your report?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump's Tariff Boredom, Hegseth Goes Diet Woke, Sports War: Super Bowl | Jesse Eisenberg
No. No, you can't put your spa services on the show's credit card. That's embezzlement, Michael. That's a felony.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump's Tariff Boredom, Hegseth Goes Diet Woke, Sports War: Super Bowl | Jesse Eisenberg
Grace, Troy, and Michael, everyone. That's totally useful. We'll come back. We'll decide who won the Super Bowl. Stick around.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump's Tariff Boredom, Hegseth Goes Diet Woke, Sports War: Super Bowl | Jesse Eisenberg
Welcome back to The Daily Show. I think I speak for everyone when I say politics drools and sports rules. For a full recap of the biggest stories in the world of jocks and straps, we turn to Sports War.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Jon Stewart Knocks Dems' Lack of Vision Countering Trump Agenda | Sen. Chris Murphy
Well, John, John, I got to tell you, it is March Madness, a month of exciting college basketball tournament starts this week. And I've already got my bracket filled out. It's already busted. Damn it. Damn it. There goes Jordan Jr. 's little college fun.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Jon Stewart Knocks Dems' Lack of Vision Countering Trump Agenda | Sen. Chris Murphy
The New England Conservatory of Music.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Jon Stewart Knocks Dems' Lack of Vision Countering Trump Agenda | Sen. Chris Murphy
It's fish or cut bait time for Senator Schumer. He's gotta either urinate or get off the pot. Vivid imagery there from Senator John Kennedy.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Air Travel
All my flight attendants, all my flight attendants, all my flight attendants, put your hands up. All right, stop. Buckle up and listen.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
DOGE Protestors Turn on Tesla & Astronauts Make It Home | Anthony Carrigan
Thank you, Michael. We'll come back. Anthony Kerrigan will be joining me on the show. Don't go away.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
DOGE Protestors Turn on Tesla & Astronauts Make It Home | Anthony Carrigan
Welcome back to The Daily Show. My guest tonight is an Emmy-nominated actor whose new film is called Death of a Unicorn. Please welcome Anthony Kerrigan. Welcome, Anthony.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
DOGE Protestors Turn on Tesla & Astronauts Make It Home | Anthony Carrigan
This death of a unicorn, they tell you what happens right there in the title.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
DOGE Protestors Turn on Tesla & Astronauts Make It Home | Anthony Carrigan
I was going to say, unicorns are real in this horror comedy.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
DOGE Protestors Turn on Tesla & Astronauts Make It Home | Anthony Carrigan
Did you find out, they didn't go into it in the movie, is the unicorn blood what keeps Paul Rudd's face so young and smooth?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
DOGE Protestors Turn on Tesla & Astronauts Make It Home | Anthony Carrigan
They did use real unicorns.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
DOGE Protestors Turn on Tesla & Astronauts Make It Home | Anthony Carrigan
Yeah.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
DOGE Protestors Turn on Tesla & Astronauts Make It Home | Anthony Carrigan
I feel like they moved through the space almost like velociraptors.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
DOGE Protestors Turn on Tesla & Astronauts Make It Home | Anthony Carrigan
Although I wanted it to be a little bit more real. Not that unicorns aren't real, but that if they were, RFK Jr. would be eating them, you know?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
DOGE Protestors Turn on Tesla & Astronauts Make It Home | Anthony Carrigan
You're silent for the majority of this. It's true, yes. How do you prep for this? To be a, to find the, are you looking in the mirror? Are you practicing responses? How do you find your silence?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
DOGE Protestors Turn on Tesla & Astronauts Make It Home | Anthony Carrigan
Donald Trump has released 64,000 pages of long, secret JFK files. So we could finally learn who really killed JFK. And guess what? Turns out it was heart disease. Yeah, the man loved his French fries. But speaking of a once-in-a-generation charming sex machine, Elon Musk. Now... Oh, baby. I love it. I love it.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
DOGE Protestors Turn on Tesla & Astronauts Make It Home | Anthony Carrigan
So you can't just bullshit with words?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
DOGE Protestors Turn on Tesla & Astronauts Make It Home | Anthony Carrigan
Trust me, it's a great tactic. I use it often. Totally. You find so much in all the characters that you do. I loved you on Barry as NoHo Hank. And, yeah, amazing. Thank you. Is it true that you were only supposed to be in the first episode and you were going to die at the end? Yeah.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
DOGE Protestors Turn on Tesla & Astronauts Make It Home | Anthony Carrigan
Is that right?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
DOGE Protestors Turn on Tesla & Astronauts Make It Home | Anthony Carrigan
But what do you think, what was it? You guys just had a connection? It was like, oh, there's more here than just killing somebody in a car?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
DOGE Protestors Turn on Tesla & Astronauts Make It Home | Anthony Carrigan
Yeah, you're not a Chechnyan gangster.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
DOGE Protestors Turn on Tesla & Astronauts Make It Home | Anthony Carrigan
I was going to say, that's a fun one to play around with.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
DOGE Protestors Turn on Tesla & Astronauts Make It Home | Anthony Carrigan
Ben Affleck isn't creating some wild drama right now that you could sneak into?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
DOGE Protestors Turn on Tesla & Astronauts Make It Home | Anthony Carrigan
You've also been working on the new Superman movie.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
DOGE Protestors Turn on Tesla & Astronauts Make It Home | Anthony Carrigan
Yeah, you get to do it. Can you tell us right now, do you hide who you are in this movie with an accent?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
DOGE Protestors Turn on Tesla & Astronauts Make It Home | Anthony Carrigan
100%.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
DOGE Protestors Turn on Tesla & Astronauts Make It Home | Anthony Carrigan
Explore more shows from the Daily Show podcast universe by searching The Daily Show, wherever you get your podcasts. Watch The Daily Show weeknights at 11, 10 Central on Comedy Central, and stream full episodes anytime on Paramount+.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
DOGE Protestors Turn on Tesla & Astronauts Make It Home | Anthony Carrigan
Now, he's the world's richest man, the leader of Doge, and guy who thinks Sauron is the hero of the story. And say what you want about Elon, but he certainly has his fans.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
DOGE Protestors Turn on Tesla & Astronauts Make It Home | Anthony Carrigan
I'm not saying Donald Trump is racist, but that man does love a hard R. But if you step outside of the White House, you'll find a backlash brewing against the founder of Tesla.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
DOGE Protestors Turn on Tesla & Astronauts Make It Home | Anthony Carrigan
Oh, tough crowd. You know you're in trouble when you even pissed off the kid with the cherry eight ball sweater. like the chillest sweater there is.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
DOGE Protestors Turn on Tesla & Astronauts Make It Home | Anthony Carrigan
These crowds have been so angry towards these congressmen, some of them have decided to stop holding town halls altogether, which feels a little thin-skinned, considering this is basically the same kind of vitriol an Applebee's bartender gets when the white wine's not filled to the brim. Again, Kyle, I'm sorry I flew off the handle. Papa needs his pinot grige.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
DOGE Protestors Turn on Tesla & Astronauts Make It Home | Anthony Carrigan
And some people are not content to just scream about Elon in a high school gym. They're taking to the streets or the parking lots.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
DOGE Protestors Turn on Tesla & Astronauts Make It Home | Anthony Carrigan
Wow, you guys like petty acts of domestic terrorism, huh? Cool. Wow. Okay, let me just say, nobody should be breaking the law and blowing up Teslas. Especially because if you just wait a few minutes, they'll probably do it by themselves. And in case you're wondering why people might do this, some have been leaving helpful messages.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
DOGE Protestors Turn on Tesla & Astronauts Make It Home | Anthony Carrigan
I think you might have wanted to blur out a little more there because now it just looks like they just wrote. Obviously, Elon has a lot of kids, so he's got a lot of, you know. You don't have to be so overt. The point is, there's a ton of rage directed at Elon right now, which is why last night he went on Sean Hannity and made the case for his victimhood.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
DOGE Protestors Turn on Tesla & Astronauts Make It Home | Anthony Carrigan
I shouldn't have to explain this to Elon, but it's not about the Teslas. Teslas are actually pretty cool as a car. It's got that all-glass thing going on, kind of like a Popemobile that f***s. It's got door handles that are hard to find, which is what everybody wants in a door handle. Everything in the car is electronic, so if it malfunctions, you just drown in it, you know?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
DOGE Protestors Turn on Tesla & Astronauts Make It Home | Anthony Carrigan
It's like a free coffin. It's cool. It's cool. I give them credit. I don't think people, though, are mad at you because of the Teslas, Elon. If I were to hazard a guess... but why they'd be mad.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
DOGE Protestors Turn on Tesla & Astronauts Make It Home | Anthony Carrigan
It might be because in the last several weeks, you fired tens of thousands of federal workers, you made cuts to veterans care, life-saving foreign aid and food banks, you canceled important medical research, sometimes so abruptly that this happened.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
DOGE Protestors Turn on Tesla & Astronauts Make It Home | Anthony Carrigan
Yeah! People might get a little upset if you stop their medical trial halfway through them. Imagine you had to stop getting your malaria medication or going home with half a butt lift. Imagine it! Imagine it! You'll never buy pants off the rack again. Or here, here's another guess. Maybe people are mad at you because you don't seem to know what the f*** you're doing. I'm guessing. I'm guessing.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
DOGE Protestors Turn on Tesla & Astronauts Make It Home | Anthony Carrigan
I'm guessing. I'm guessing. Because... You fired aviation safety staff, then you had to hire them back. You fired nuclear safety inspectors, then you had to hire them back. You cut funding for Ebola prevention and then said, oopsie.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
DOGE Protestors Turn on Tesla & Astronauts Make It Home | Anthony Carrigan
Yeah, I think we do. And if someone just accidentally cut it, I think we'd all be pretty mad. I might even Banksy some Third Reich ejaculate. Look, I could come up with more reasons, but let's be honest. Elon knows why people are mad at him. We know he's not as smart as he pretends to be, but he's also not as dumb as he's pretending to be right now.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
DOGE Protestors Turn on Tesla & Astronauts Make It Home | Anthony Carrigan
And when he goes on Sean Hannity to complain about why people hate him, he's just proving that the troll king of the internet can't handle the consequences of the real world. But you know what? You know what, Elon? You know what? No. Here, Elon, Elon, if you genuinely want people to not hate you, you could focus on the things you are good at. I mean, you did get those astronauts back.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
DOGE Protestors Turn on Tesla & Astronauts Make It Home | Anthony Carrigan
It was a beautiful moment.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
DOGE Protestors Turn on Tesla & Astronauts Make It Home | Anthony Carrigan
You know what? I think that's great. Look, I have to not be a hater for a second, okay? Elon brought them back safely from space after being stranded there for months, and dolphins even showed up to say hi. That is incredible. I mean, I wish the dolphins hadn't welcomed them back with a Sieg Heil, but still, still. It's a beautiful moment for humanity.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
DOGE Protestors Turn on Tesla & Astronauts Make It Home | Anthony Carrigan
Now, it was a joyous moment, but those astronauts were gone a long, long time. Thankfully, the good folks at NASA prepared a video to help them acclimate to the world they're coming back to.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
DOGE Protestors Turn on Tesla & Astronauts Make It Home | Anthony Carrigan
When we come back, we honor the luck of the Irish. Don't go away.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
DOGE Protestors Turn on Tesla & Astronauts Make It Home | Anthony Carrigan
This is The Daily Show with your host, Jordan Klepper.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
DOGE Protestors Turn on Tesla & Astronauts Make It Home | Anthony Carrigan
Welcome back to The Daily Show. Monday was St. Patrick's Day, when Irish Americans honor their heritage with careful readings of the writings of James Joyce, group performances of traditional Irish music, and a somber reflection of the beauty of the Celtic language. But how do you celebrate being Irish in the Donald Trump era? Michael Kosta hit the streets to find out.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
DOGE Protestors Turn on Tesla & Astronauts Make It Home | Anthony Carrigan
Welcome to the NHL, Gordon Clapper. We got so much to talk about tonight. Elon Musk wants you to stop bullying his cars. Michael Kosta finds out the meaning of St. Patrick's Day. And those astronauts finally return to Earth. And boy, did they have a lot of unread emails. So, let's get into headlines. First, first, some big breaking news.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Elon Crashes the Oval Office, Trump Pushes Gaza Takeover | Colman Domingo
My guest tonight is an Emmy-winning actor who has his second consecutive Oscar nomination for his role in the film Sing Sing. Please welcome Coleman Domingo. What a warm welcome. They love it. Did you feel, even in that clip, we show a 13-second clip, and there's a beat, and the audience is silent, and the teardrops. That's some top-notch acting right there, Colvin DeMego. Thank you so much.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Elon Crashes the Oval Office, Trump Pushes Gaza Takeover | Colman Domingo
You are feeling in that moment.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Elon Crashes the Oval Office, Trump Pushes Gaza Takeover | Colman Domingo
It's gorgeous. I wish you could just bottle the joy and the hope that's in this film and just pass it out to everybody here right now.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Elon Crashes the Oval Office, Trump Pushes Gaza Takeover | Colman Domingo
You're all getting his gifts. Oh, that's great.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Elon Crashes the Oval Office, Trump Pushes Gaza Takeover | Colman Domingo
There's a little bit of joy underneath all your seats. It is a beautiful story, the transformative power of art. Did you have a moment for you as somebody who's been in the arts on stage, in front of the camera? Like, what do you think of when you think back on that?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Elon Crashes the Oval Office, Trump Pushes Gaza Takeover | Colman Domingo
There's no problem, and nobody's going to question it? Trump is like a Jedi who doesn't have the force. I'll take Gaza. Nobody's going to question it. Nobody. Is this thing working? Is this thing... Is this... Trump has another plan to convince the haters. A charm offensive.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Elon Crashes the Oval Office, Trump Pushes Gaza Takeover | Colman Domingo
And a lot of the... A lot... Many of the actors in the film were a part of this program, were formerly incarcerated.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Elon Crashes the Oval Office, Trump Pushes Gaza Takeover | Colman Domingo
It's remarkable. What is it like? What is it like collaborating with folks who were formerly incarcerated compared to Hollywood nepo babies? Like, were you just relieved to be like, oh, there's no nepo babies on the call sheet today?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Elon Crashes the Oval Office, Trump Pushes Gaza Takeover | Colman Domingo
When you're even working with, like, one of your close friends who you're sort of paired with within the film, Clarence, you have scenes where you're actually working about going over lines and what have you, which in some ways is almost meta as to the things that you were doing off-camera.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Elon Crashes the Oval Office, Trump Pushes Gaza Takeover | Colman Domingo
Yeah.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Elon Crashes the Oval Office, Trump Pushes Gaza Takeover | Colman Domingo
Yeah. You know what I found really remarkable... It's such a lovely film. It feels so... It feels insular in that, like, I've seen many films that take place inside a prison that have so many external plots that act on these characters. And I think this movie lives so much within the characters.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Elon Crashes the Oval Office, Trump Pushes Gaza Takeover | Colman Domingo
And there's a world that exists outside of it and consequences that exist within the prison itself, but it really sits with people kind of dealing with their own emotions and how they...
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Elon Crashes the Oval Office, Trump Pushes Gaza Takeover | Colman Domingo
Okay. So it's going to be an ethnic cherishing. I got it. Okay, okay. I mean, how did that start like a Mussolini speech and end as a Boyz II Men song? We will take the land, it will be ours, and we're gonna make love to you. Like you want us to, and I'll hold it tight, baby, all through the night.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Elon Crashes the Oval Office, Trump Pushes Gaza Takeover | Colman Domingo
Keep a little bit of hope and a connection to one another.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Elon Crashes the Oval Office, Trump Pushes Gaza Takeover | Colman Domingo
And that's based on, there's some little clips at the end.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Elon Crashes the Oval Office, Trump Pushes Gaza Takeover | Colman Domingo
So you're going to win an Oscar for this. Do you have your speech written? No. No? No. What do you do? Are you going to prep one? No.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Elon Crashes the Oval Office, Trump Pushes Gaza Takeover | Colman Domingo
You can't.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Elon Crashes the Oval Office, Trump Pushes Gaza Takeover | Colman Domingo
You are going to kill it, though.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Elon Crashes the Oval Office, Trump Pushes Gaza Takeover | Colman Domingo
Yeah.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Elon Crashes the Oval Office, Trump Pushes Gaza Takeover | Colman Domingo
Yes. Okay. I appreciate that. It would mean more on stage. Yeah.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Elon Crashes the Oval Office, Trump Pushes Gaza Takeover | Colman Domingo
Okay. Note taken. Note taken, good. You're a co-chair of the upcoming Met Gala? Yes. So that's... I mean, that's a lot. That's a lot. I mean, does that add pressure? Like, now, can you even go to the store anymore without thinking about, like, you need to dress?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Elon Crashes the Oval Office, Trump Pushes Gaza Takeover | Colman Domingo
One thing I find weird about Donald Trump saying he wants to run Gaza is that from what we've seen so far, he barely wants to run the United States. For weeks, people have been raising alarms about how Trump seems to be handing way too much power over to Elon Musk. And yesterday, Trump replied, I hear you. You want me to give more power to Elon Musk.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Elon Crashes the Oval Office, Trump Pushes Gaza Takeover | Colman Domingo
Right? I 100% did, because people are like, oh, Colman Domingo's coming out. He's going to look fantastic. Get that blue suit out. They're like, get the blue suit. No, get the extra blue suit. Good, good. Yeah, this is me pushing boundaries here.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Elon Crashes the Oval Office, Trump Pushes Gaza Takeover | Colman Domingo
I'm going to work on my style. Yeah. And thank you for the film. It truly is. It truly is a wonderful piece of art. And if you have even just like just a little shout out from that stage, just even just like a quick thank you, Jordan, it'll go.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Elon Crashes the Oval Office, Trump Pushes Gaza Takeover | Colman Domingo
One of these one of these Carol Burnett.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Elon Crashes the Oval Office, Trump Pushes Gaza Takeover | Colman Domingo
I'll take it. One hundred percent. Take it. Sing Sing is available to watch at home on all major platforms. We'll take a quick break. We'll be right back after this. That's our show for tonight. Now, here it is. Your moment of fact.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Elon Crashes the Oval Office, Trump Pushes Gaza Takeover | Colman Domingo
Let me just ask you, and maybe your last answer is a preview of, I think, what you could say here, but I want to hear why. But do you think that calling Elon Musk a dick is effective messaging for confronting what is a potentially irreversible transformation of the U.S. government?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Elon Crashes the Oval Office, Trump Pushes Gaza Takeover | Colman Domingo
Yes, Elon Musk is now in charge of all government hilings, hirings, hirings. I didn't... Sorry. I didn't say that right. Right. I didn't say it right.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Elon Crashes the Oval Office, Trump Pushes Gaza Takeover | Colman Domingo
I don't know why I keep Hitler. Misspeaking. I don't know why I keep misspeaking. So this was already a pretty unusual thing for a president to do. But Trump being Trump, he had to make it even more ridiculous by introducing it with a full-on circus act in the Oval Office. And look at this scene.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Elon Crashes the Oval Office, Trump Pushes Gaza Takeover | Colman Domingo
Musk is holding court with his hands tented like a Bond villain, probably to stop him from doing a Nazi salute. With his... With his four-year-old child in tow. I mean, that poor kid. His dad literally runs SpaceX, and Elon took him to a meeting on federal spending. Dad, are we gonna get to see the rockets? No, son, we're gonna discuss budgets because I'm a shitty dad.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Elon Crashes the Oval Office, Trump Pushes Gaza Takeover | Colman Domingo
I mean, everything about this event was so bizarre. Trump was sitting quietly for half an hour, retreating to his happy place, thinking about Arnold Palmer's giant doge. And who thought cloning Stephen Miller was a good idea? I mean, is it for spare parts? I mean, they look like a before and even more before picture. Okay? I mean... Okay, but all right.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Elon Crashes the Oval Office, Trump Pushes Gaza Takeover | Colman Domingo
Leaving aside this Renaissance painting done by the dogs playing poker guy, it's good that we have Elon Musk here, because we've been watching him slashing programs and shuttering agencies for a month now, and we can finally ask Elon, why are you doing this?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Elon Crashes the Oval Office, Trump Pushes Gaza Takeover | Colman Domingo
Wow. Wow. I mean, you see why this guy's a genius. You don't want an unelected bureaucrat running the country. It makes a lot of sense. No questions here. I do have one question, though.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Elon Crashes the Oval Office, Trump Pushes Gaza Takeover | Colman Domingo
I mean... I mean, am I... Am I going crazy? Because it feels like I'm watching Drake sing Not Like Us at karaoke. Does he not know? Is having this one unaccountable bureaucrat in charge better than having those other unaccountable bureaucrats in charge? Because at least the others have to follow transparency laws. The only thing transparent about Doge is Elon's skin. I mean...
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Elon Crashes the Oval Office, Trump Pushes Gaza Takeover | Colman Domingo
His financial disclosure is being kept secret, Doge is exempt from open records laws, and when someone on Twitter merely identified some of the people who work for Doge, Elon suspended their account and said, you have committed a crime, which we tried to fact check with career officials at the FBI, but they're all working at a Panera now.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Elon Crashes the Oval Office, Trump Pushes Gaza Takeover | Colman Domingo
So, Elon, I gotta tell you, I don't think you're being that transparent.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Elon Crashes the Oval Office, Trump Pushes Gaza Takeover | Colman Domingo
Oh! Well, I did the exam, and what an asshole! I don't want to give you a proctology exam. I just want to know what you're doing, because another advantage of federal bureaucrats is that they can't have conflicts of interest, whereas you seem to have every conflict of interest. SpaceX has government contracts. Tesla is under government oversight. X is under government investigation.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Elon Crashes the Oval Office, Trump Pushes Gaza Takeover | Colman Domingo
And his hair plugs are being investigated by the Department of No One's Buying This. You're basically a walking conflict of interest. Is that not a huge problem?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Elon Crashes the Oval Office, Trump Pushes Gaza Takeover | Colman Domingo
No? No? Nothing happened? There's no accountability and nothing matters? Great. Perfect system. Well, f*** it. He's not going to be transparent. And he's riddled with conflicts of interest. But at least he's a genius. And the work he's going to do will be flawless.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Elon Crashes the Oval Office, Trump Pushes Gaza Takeover | Colman Domingo
Nobody's going to bat 1,000. You made up a $50 million conspiracy of sending condoms to Gaza. You're not grounding out to third. You're puking into the umpire's mouth. And just for the record, of course the United States didn't send $50 million worth of condoms to Gaza. We sent $5 million of vibrating sex swings to North Korea, and I believe it stopped nuclear war. But don't quote me on that.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Elon Crashes the Oval Office, Trump Pushes Gaza Takeover | Colman Domingo
I'm not going to bat 1,000. So, to summarize, he's not transparent, he has tons of conflict, he believes any lie he hears, and he spreads false rumors that go global. Honestly, I'd be pretty mad at him right now if he didn't have so much gosh darn charisma.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Elon Crashes the Oval Office, Trump Pushes Gaza Takeover | Colman Domingo
Welcome to the Daily Show. I'm Jordan Klepper. We have a lot to talk about tonight. Trump gets romantic at the worst possible moment. Marco Rubio has the ultimate glow-up. And the White House celebrates Bring Your Elon to Work Day. So, let's get into another installment of the second coming of Donald J. Trump. Yesterday was a busy day at the White House.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Elon Crashes the Oval Office, Trump Pushes Gaza Takeover | Colman Domingo
Look, if you want to see more of that kind of comedy, then don't worry, because there's a new special coming out that's just for you.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Elon Crashes the Oval Office, Trump Pushes Gaza Takeover | Colman Domingo
Oh, when we come back, we find out about the man who's going to get us into war. Don't go away.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Elon Crashes the Oval Office, Trump Pushes Gaza Takeover | Colman Domingo
Welcome back to The Daily Show. Every time Donald Trump farts out a new idea for buying a foreign country or slapping tariffs on imported salami, the person who has to translate that into policy is his Secretary of State, Marco Rubio. But how did Rubio get such an exciting job? Let's find out in a brand new Daily Showography.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Elon Crashes the Oval Office, Trump Pushes Gaza Takeover | Colman Domingo
First, Trump met with the king of Jordan, the country, Jordan. You're not the boss of me, King Abdullah II, okay? Of course, Trump invited the king to discuss his plan to displace two million people and turn Gaza into the Atlantic City of the Middle East, which sounds pretty clear-cut to me, but apparently the nitpickers in the media still have questions.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Proposes Gaza Takeover, Ko$ta Doin' Business | Julia Stiles
Yeah, maybe it's not crazy. Maybe it's so good it sounds crazy, Desi. Maybe it's time to think outside the box, you know? They say it's better to beg for forgiveness than to ask for permission. But what if we did neither, you know? That's outside the box thinking.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Proposes Gaza Takeover, Ko$ta Doin' Business | Julia Stiles
I'm desperately trying not to, Desi. I'd rather not contemplate American culpability here. So let's just think of this as the brainstorming phase. No bad ideas.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Proposes Gaza Takeover, Ko$ta Doin' Business | Julia Stiles
Bad idea, okay? Come on, Desi. Let's be serious here. You don't want to drive the Palestinians out? Fine. We'll drive them up. Put the entire Gaza Strip on 10-foot stilts, create a bunk bed situation. Palestinians on top, sing lullabies to the Israelis below, you know? Who says no to the top bunk? No one.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Proposes Gaza Takeover, Ko$ta Doin' Business | Julia Stiles
Don't think of it as displacement, especially if you're a prosecutor at the Hague. Instead, how about this? How about this? Let's get some cruise ships and the Palestinians can explore the world. After a few years, they can come back refreshed with one of those little Jamaican hair braids, maybe a weird French accent whenever they say croissants, you know.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Proposes Gaza Takeover, Ko$ta Doin' Business | Julia Stiles
Call in elevators, lifts, all that bullshit. Yes.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Proposes Gaza Takeover, Ko$ta Doin' Business | Julia Stiles
No, then they get right back on the boat, you know? Another trip around the world, hair braids for all.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Proposes Gaza Takeover, Ko$ta Doin' Business | Julia Stiles
Come on, Desi! If that idea existed the whole time, then what's happening right now would make us the bad guys. So let's just keep spitballing, okay? Here's one. We take every Israeli and Palestinian and surgically swap their faces. Now they don't know who's who, you know? Are you my wife or my neighbor? I can't tell.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Proposes Gaza Takeover, Ko$ta Doin' Business | Julia Stiles
Okay. Do you have a better idea from a Nick Cage movie that doesn't make us complicit in war crimes?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Proposes Gaza Takeover, Ko$ta Doin' Business | Julia Stiles
I don't know what else to do, Desi. Maybe AI is the solution.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Proposes Gaza Takeover, Ko$ta Doin' Business | Julia Stiles
That's the first thing we'll ask AI.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Proposes Gaza Takeover, Ko$ta Doin' Business | Julia Stiles
You know what, Desi? You might be right, but hear me out. What if Palestinians stole the Declaration of Independence?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
In the Field with Desi Lydic
My real name's Jordan Bedford, but I go by the Alligator Man.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
In the Field with Desi Lydic
We all different. Well, I'm different from the rest, because I do the wrong thing in the right way, if that makes sense.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
In the Field with Desi Lydic
No? See, you're not from Florida, so you don't understand my language, what I'm talking right now, but I do the wild things. Anything you think of, I'll probably do it. Anything? Anything. I catch gators.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
In the Field with Desi Lydic
Anything. Well, not anything. Oh. But basically anything, when it comes to the reptile animals. Mainly the alligators, though. The way like here in Florida, you're not allowed to catch an alligator. I mean, I didn't know that before, but I know now. I just had a little fun, put them on a leash and danced with the last one they seen.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
In the Field with Desi Lydic
The alligator man dance. You gotta kick your feet, spell alligator in the sand as you're dancing, as you're going around, you spell an alligator and you end it with a stomp. The alligator man got a commercial, too. You have a commercial? Yeah, he got a commercial. He got a theme song. Everybody sing like, na-na-na-na-na, it's the alligator man.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
In the Field with Desi Lydic
If there's a lake, there's a gator. I promise you. So that's everywhere. There's gators everywhere.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
After the Cut | Correspondents 2024 - Part 2
People have no sense of there being a gray area or being unsure of how something should play out. And it doesn't mean you shouldn't be strong in your convictions, but I think you need to leave space to be wrong and to be curious. And so I think with a total amount of certainty and a lack of uncertainty comes a lack of curiosity, in which case we just become these people lost in those silos.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
After the Cut | Correspondents 2024 - Part 2
And so... I think my job as a dad, how I see it, in terms of, like, what am I supposed to do? I'm supposed to feed and water it, right? I think I got that. You can water this child. But I think I need to instill and maintain a sense of curiosity, a sense of confidence to walk into the world, and a sense of finding virtue in uncertainty as opposed to certainty.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
After the Cut | Correspondents 2024 - Part 2
And then from there, he needs to walk his own path. But that's simply because I can't afford it past 18, you know? Yeah. Yeah.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
After the Cut | Correspondents 2024 - Part 2
We're so many talented people here at The Daily Show, and a day or two before we go out into the field, we're watching the news. We're having the same conversations you're probably having at home about people are talking about this. I hear the arguments on the right are this. I see hypocrisies here.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
After the Cut | Correspondents 2024 - Part 2
And we sort of have almost debate prep among producers and writers here where we sit down in a room, we're like... Where do you see holes in these arguments? We start to find the humor in those holes, the obvious hypocrisy in those arguments. And when we go out there, we've kind of talked through, like, where we see these holes that you could sometimes drive a pickup truck through.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
After the Cut | Correspondents 2024 - Part 2
But then I'm an improviser. That's where I came from. I'm not a standup. I spent 15 years doing improv in Chicago and New York. And the big thing about improv is when you get out there, you let it all go and you let go of your preconceived notions and you listen and you listen hard. And so in those moments,
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
After the Cut | Correspondents 2024 - Part 2
I have a great team behind me that we've done the prep work, and then you just, you try to engage and be present because the things that you find, the moments of humor or the moments of revelation of a point of view that you haven't heard before, but you see somebody now spouting this at me, they come from that person feeling comfortable in the conversation with me,
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
After the Cut | Correspondents 2024 - Part 2
They come from that person saying something unique and me being open enough to actually hear it and to try to spin it. So I think it's a skill set that you use in improvisation. It's a skill set that you use in being a good husband. And it's basically like, get out of your head and listen to what that person's saying. I'll tell you this, though.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
After the Cut | Correspondents 2024 - Part 2
A skill set that doesn't help being a good husband is finding that weird thing they say and try to use it against them. Now that... I will say, my wife might say that that is, it's a double edged sword, if you will.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
After the Cut | Correspondents 2024 - Part 2
The legacy I want to leave to my audience? Oh, my. I got to tell you, I haven't been here long enough for that. Give me some time to accrue some legacy, and then we'll move on. I'll tell you this, though. Perhaps... I was a fan of The Daily Show before I was a worker at The Daily Show. I used to watch it in college. It was one of my first forays into being interested in news.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
After the Cut | Correspondents 2024 - Part 2
In fact, I watched it before that. I watched Craig Kilbourne host the show when I was in high school, and I loved it. I thought it was so funny. I love Craig Kilbourne. He looked great in a suit. We were the same height. It was perfect. In comes Jon Stewart, and he's so insightful, thoughtful. And at college, it was like, oh, he makes the news compelling.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
After the Cut | Correspondents 2024 - Part 2
I understand that he's not kowtowing to one side. He's just calling out bullshit. And I like this guy. And I was a fan before ever getting a chance to ever audition and be a part of the show. And so the legacy that it left in me was like, be interested. Don't be afraid to challenge bullshit. Um, uh, and always look somewhere for more.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
After the Cut | Correspondents 2024 - Part 2
And, uh, and I think, like, that-that thirst and that hunger to know more, and I think that, um, that basic idea of call out bullshit where you see it, I think it's sort of built into the institutional legacy of this show. And so that-that is what I'm most proud of here.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
After the Cut | Correspondents 2024 - Part 2
Oh my gosh. What advice do I tell my child? He's three and a half, so I keep him away from all news. I truly do. And even PAW Patrol, which is just teaching him, indoctrinating a love of police and authority. So that's a problem as well. You see it seep in. To me, I think exposure is the first step. Expose yourself to kids. Is that what I'm telling you?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
After the Cut | Correspondents 2024 - Part 2
Yes. That's my fam. I got my parents, my sister, my brother, my aunt, my uncle, my other uncle up there. Am I nervous? No, I'm f***ing excited to do it in front of my family. I will say this. As cool as it is that my parents are here, it is not surprising Because they came to every gosh darn show I've done and that they could come to.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
After the Cut | Correspondents 2024 - Part 2
And... And a big part of why I am here is because I got into improv at Kalamazoo, Michigan. Kalamazoo College. And I... I got on the improv team Munkapult and we did shows in a little black box theater for 95 college students and two 50-somethings. 40-somethings, sorry. My parents would come and they would support me.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
After the Cut | Correspondents 2024 - Part 2
And I was a math major at the time and I was spending my time doing improv and then traveling to the Improv Olympic here in Chicago. And then I came to Chicago and I found another family at places like the ImprovOlympic. I think Sharna Halpern is here tonight as well. There she is. Founder of the ImprovOlympic, gosh darn, long form improvisation, Sharna Halpern right there.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
After the Cut | Correspondents 2024 - Part 2
She gave me a space to fail and to succeed and to fail and fail and fail again. And more often than not, my parents would hop in the car and they would drive over to Chicago and they would watch these shows at weird times with their son who wasn't making any money. He was a substitute teacher at Chicago Public Schools making a little bit of money during the day, not a lot.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
After the Cut | Correspondents 2024 - Part 2
And my parents wouldn't judge it. They would just support it. They would love it. And I look back on that. And when I look back on it, frankly, I think it's irresponsible. Not a smart move to let your child just do improv in Chicago for a decade. Getting paid peanuts. But I loved it.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
After the Cut | Correspondents 2024 - Part 2
She let me find, my family let me find my people, the things that I loved, be surrounded by people who were interested in the things that I loved and the things I liked to do. Supported me when I went to New York and got to try out for fun things like this. And then, a long 17 years later, no, a long...
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
After the Cut | Correspondents 2024 - Part 2
24 years later, I get to come to the Athenaeum Theater where I used to do improv for the Chicago Improv Festival, and I get to do a great show on The Daily Show with you guys. So thank you. Truly, thank you.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
After the Cut | Correspondents 2024 - Part 2
I mean, it comes from meeting other people, talking to other people, and staying curious enough to understand where they come from. I think I've talked about this a little bit before, but when I go out in the road and I talk to people at rallies, and it's rallies, MAGA rallies, and even rallies on the left as well, I think the thing that I find... least appealing is certainty.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Groundhog Day
John, thank you. John, it has been a whale of a day here. And I'm happy to report that Westchester Wally did not see his shadow. So Sprig is on the way.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Groundhog Day
Because you look... A little scrappy. It was a little... All's well that ends well.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Groundhog Day
Oh, he won't. I've made sure of that. You'll see your shadow in hell, Wally.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
After the Cut | Correspondents 2024 - Part 1
When they told us that Jon Stewart was coming back, there was such an air of relief and focus in this studio. One, they're like, thank God we still have all these small suits. We didn't know what to do with it. Thank God we can use these. He's very tiny. But also, I think, like, we were ready to get started. This year is a dumpster fire, and it's more important than ever.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
After the Cut | Correspondents 2024 - Part 1
Well, I remember that moment that I, as a man, stepped in and was like, you ladies look lost. Follow the dude, Gloria Steinem. Come over here. I would say one of the fun, like, it is, it's such a small little building, and you see guests wandering around all the time. I remember Paul McCartney was here, and I know, have you heard him? From the Eagles, great, great musician. Love the Eagles.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
After the Cut | Correspondents 2024 - Part 1
But he came on, and he was one of the few guests where we were sort of told internally, don't be in the hallways. Yeah. Because sometimes you can find yourself in the hallway bumping into people and be like, oh, hey, President Clinton. I want to say hi. And so McCartney, they're like, stay in your edit bays. And I remember hearing Paul McCartney walk through the hallway singing as he does.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
After the Cut | Correspondents 2024 - Part 1
We get it. We get it. And nobody interrupted with him. He went out. He did his piece. And I was editing a piece in an edit bay. And he came off the show. And he walked through. And I saw, out of the corner of my eye, the door was open. I saw McCartney walk by. And then he came into our edit bay. He turned around, walked into our edit bay. And he was like, so what's this?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
After the Cut | Correspondents 2024 - Part 1
What are you guys playing with? What are you fucking around with here? What is this? What are you doing? What are you doing? Did he give notes? Well, immediately we jumped into bits. Like, I don't know. This music in here sucks. What do you want to do? And he started playing the game of making fun of everything in there.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
After the Cut | Correspondents 2024 - Part 1
And you realized, I realized in that moment, it was like he just wanted to play. Like, he shows up to places, this creative, fun guy. And the world, like, shuts down around him, not to bother Paul McCartney. But he was just like this element of joy that walked through the space that just wanted people to play with him. And so we told him to get the fuck out, and that was it. Yeah.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
After the Cut | Correspondents 2024 - Part 1
And this building is made to comment on the news, talk about it, find humor in the bullshit, and call out the BS wherever you see it. And John invented it. He built the foundation of this place. And when he walked back in that door, like, we had... We had a great year without a permanent host, and it was really fun getting to hear so many different voices and so many talented people.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
After the Cut | Correspondents 2024 - Part 1
Never call him again. Haven't heard from him since.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
After the Cut | Correspondents 2024 - Part 1
Well, I mean, the biggest issues... I mean, obviously, we... What I would love... I'd love to do some boring things. I think term limits would be amazing right now. I think I'd like them to functionally focus on ways in which we could break this divided quagmire we are in. You can talk about the big issues, like, we're a divided country, all this. All that stuff is true.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
After the Cut | Correspondents 2024 - Part 1
I think a big problem we have is the way we are set up is a... problem. And you have people trying to get into office and stay there forever. It's not a lifetime job. People should be doing that job for a couple years in the House. Do it for six years, get the hell out. Supreme Court, do it for 12, let somebody else come in. I think we should be...
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
After the Cut | Correspondents 2024 - Part 1
We should talk about ways in which we can rework this that is more a reflection of the modern political environment that allows more ideas to come in and less stagnation. So whatever we can do to focus on that, I think, is hugely important. And then secondarily, I'm always...
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
After the Cut | Correspondents 2024 - Part 1
always so flabbergasted that we can't do anything about gun violence in this country and you watch the news today before we come out here there's another goddamn shooting and I think yet again we know what we're going to see and so I think there's issues like that that are so if there is ever a need for a government to step in and protect its citizens
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
After the Cut | Correspondents 2024 - Part 1
It's on issues like that where we see people, harmless people, being attacked by careless people who aren't given enough, whether it's mental health and security, but are also given weapons of war and put in places that they shouldn't be.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
After the Cut | Correspondents 2024 - Part 1
And if we don't have a society that can look at that issue and put any partisan bickering aside and try to help kids who are scared to go to school, then, like, what help do we have in balancing a budget? Like, I think there's basic things for... If you want this... this community and citizens to believe that government can actually do something for it, that it can be effective in your lives.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
After the Cut | Correspondents 2024 - Part 1
Like, you have to take care of the most vulnerable, and you have to stop being a dipshit who's worried about getting re-elected and be a human who's worried about saving a kid.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
After the Cut | Correspondents 2024 - Part 1
It's the best. Like, I can't get in?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
After the Cut | Correspondents 2024 - Part 1
You've got to go to it. Yeah, if I get one recommendation, go to Times Square. Spend the rest of your time at Times Square. Eat the pizza in Times Square.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
After the Cut | Correspondents 2024 - Part 1
But I think John came in and was like, I'm gonna do this one day a week. And I think the rest of the news team was like, hell yeah, we got your back. We are honored and excited to be here. There's no better place, no other place I'd rather be than right here at this desk. And I think, like, you have a team that has got eyes focused on this next election and ready to go.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
After the Cut | Correspondents 2024 - Part 1
It's a classic New York. Yeah, P.F. Chang's is great.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
After the Cut | Correspondents 2024 - Part 1
No. No. Uh, no, I don't think that's, uh... That's something I've gotten super close to. I will say, though, in the last piece that we did, we went down to South Carolina, and we talked to a woman who was there on January 6th. She got arrested for being inside, spent 60 days in jail, and she came out, and she changed her opinion. And... and it was... Give her a round of applause. Great.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
After the Cut | Correspondents 2024 - Part 1
And now you guys just clap for an insurrectionist. See how easy it is? Wow. And so it was good to talk to her. I think, like, she was somebody, and I did ask her, I was like, I don't run into many people who feel like they've been through it and then come out on the other side. And she said, I think, jail shook her.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
After the Cut | Correspondents 2024 - Part 1
And I think she started doing her own research, as she said, and a couple of these things didn't line up, and she felt like she was taken in. And so she felt it was her duty to come out to this Trump rally and talk to people about what she'd been through. They weren't necessarily great at listening to her, but there's a little glimmer of hope in there. Yeah, up in the back.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
After the Cut | Correspondents 2024 - Part 1
Anything will convince them otherwise. Here's what I think. Changing somebody's mind is hard to do. And I think if you are approaching something like, I want to change their mind, you ain't going to get anywhere. I think the problem we have right now is a crisis of certainty. I talk to everybody on all sides who are very certain about their beliefs.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
After the Cut | Correspondents 2024 - Part 1
And if you actually want somebody to see something that they haven't seen before and cross that divide into believing something else, they have to acknowledge that they have a sense of uncertainty. And if they're being approached by somebody else, you have to acknowledge that you have a sense of uncertainty as well.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
After the Cut | Correspondents 2024 - Part 1
And so I think in order to change somebody's mind, you have to be a bit of a loser to begin. That sounds strange, but you have to concede something to get anywhere. And so is it going to happen on a TV show? Doubtful. But with friends and family, there's an opportunity. One, because there is a connection there and hopefully some love, although I know it's been a hard few years.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
After the Cut | Correspondents 2024 - Part 1
But I think if you can approach that not from a place of judgment and from a place of uncertainty, concede something that you don't know. Because guess what? You are probably a lot like me and you wish you were as certain about the things that you want to be. But you had to put up these guards because people are coming at you with knives all the time.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
After the Cut | Correspondents 2024 - Part 1
And it feels like the other side is so dangerous. And in many cases, they are. But if you can't relate to them like another human being and say, I, too, am uncertain about some of these things, then you will never reach them as a human being in asking them to come over to a side of better understanding. So I think our only option is a step towards concession. Yeah.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
After the Cut | Correspondents 2024 - Part 1
Sure. Uh, January 6th was a funny time. Uh... I-I, uh... I mean... I will tell you a funny January 6th story. Uh, I was there on January 6th, working, to be clear. And I had four security guards with me, because I'm a comedian, and it's 2020, and that's what you do nowadays. Uh, and I talked to a man who was swinging a pitchfork. And he was ranting about revolution.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
After the Cut | Correspondents 2024 - Part 1
I'm talking to this man with security. We all come around. I talked to this man about swinging a pitchfork. And as I'm interviewing him, we're interrupted by another man who's screaming obscenities at us. And obscenity man gets shushed by pitchfork man who said, you do not speak for me, leaving me grateful to the more level-headed man swinging a pitchfork.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
After the Cut | Correspondents 2024 - Part 1
And I swear, I swear, we made eye contact and he rolled his eyes as if to say, could you believe this guy? Here's where I have an issue with the pizza debate, is Jon Stewart comes on the show and he's a lovely guy, right? He is the loveliest four foot two person you're ever gonna meet. Very insightful. He has a lot of insightful things about the way of the world.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
After the Cut | Correspondents 2024 - Part 1
But where he's wrong is on his pizza, his vitriol for Chicago-style pizza. I will say, as somebody from the Midwest who spent a decade in Chicago, you need to understand and appreciate that there are different types of pizza. And the Chicago style is deep, a different experience. Sometimes you want to go deeper into something. Sometimes you want to spend time moving through it.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
After the Cut | Correspondents 2024 - Part 1
You want to work your muscles trying to get through the cheese, the mozzarella, all of the sauce at the time. Sometimes you want to eat it and then feel like you're going to defecate yourself at any moment. That's an experience you want to go through. And I hold Chicago pizza in high regard at the same time as holding New York pizza in high regard.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
After the Cut | Correspondents 2024 - Part 1
And I think as a society, we need to get to a point where we can enjoy all those types of pizzas.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Oh, Canada...
Three weeks ago, north of the border, a new kind of protest emerged. The trucker convoy has arrived in Ottawa.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Oh, Canada...
So I traveled to Ottawa, expecting to find some Canada nice. But their messaging was a bit more coarse. These trucks shut down businesses and made roads impassable. Can I go... Can I go around here? How do I... How do I get around? But how long were the protesters planning to paralyze Canada's 8th best city? David, how long have you been here? I've been here since day one. Holding down the fort?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Oh, Canada...
Pretty much. I'm not going anywhere. I'm coming in from New York. I go by Brooklyn's Kindest on the CB. There you go.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Oh, Canada...
You're committed to being here for two years?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Oh, Canada...
How are you going to keep up the energy to be here for two years?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Oh, Canada...
Are you worried at all with weed paranoia? No. That might creep in? No.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Oh, Canada...
No. Do you think the government is coming for you?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Oh, Canada...
So what exactly was the point of interrupting the supply chain? So what is this all about? You know what? Sorry. What is this all about?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Oh, Canada...
We're setting up essentially a truck barrier to keep everybody together so they can be united.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Oh, Canada...
Yeah, we might as well lock them in. Sort of like a parrot who locks the door and says, you guys are in here. Until the water runs out, you become friends or democracy crumbles.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Oh, Canada...
That's a freedom that everyone should have. Is the Germany comparison a stretch here in Canada?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Oh, Canada...
Are you afraid of cultural appropriation? Probably. American cultural appropriation, because we use the German excuse all the time. Oddly enough, that wasn't the only thing Canadians were appropriating.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Oh, Canada...
He stole it from another guy before him. I see the Q army on your head. Isn't Q the American thing trying to find JFK Jr.? Exactly, yeah. Yes. Exactly. What Q shit is going down here? Q? No, Q is a more, a USA. Oh, so this is like a Yankees hat. Ah, exactly. Okay, the Q thing might just be a fashion choice, but they're definitely reading the same internet as many Americans.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Oh, Canada...
You're afraid the government will sterilize you?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Oh, Canada...
Spending two weeks in the cab of a truck, pissing in a Mountain Dew can, can't be too good for the sperm production. Probably stare out of a wedding, so what's the difference? So Margaret Atwood audiobooks are apparently a thing with Canadian truckers. And while shutting down a city seems to have many obvious downsides... Hey. Excuse me. Hey. Hi. Have you seen a Prius around here?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Oh, Canada...
Some see an opportunity coming from literal gridlock.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Oh, Canada...
This is essentially a tourist boom for Ottawa right now. You can feel the tourism in the air, right? You can smell it. It smells like amphetamines and drifter blood.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Oh, Canada...
The flood of 18-wheeler-driving tourists and their Canadian AF outfits created legitimate tension with residents of the city. The downtown was shut and there was palpable anger directed at local media.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Oh, Canada...
We're getting booed over here. We've been walking around here. There seems to be a real distrust of media here. Oh, for sure. There's a lot of cameras up in your face, cameras on cameras... And while Canadian authorities have finally enacted emergency measures to try to clear the convoy, so far the trucks are still there.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Oh, Canada...
And a well-funded, never-ending street party infused with misinformation and nationalism feels remarkably possible in our own land of the free. Where does this movement go from here?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Oh, Canada...
You think this is inspiring the dickheads in America?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Oh, Canada...
This is inspiring the dickheads in America?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Oh, Canada...
Okay, if they do come to America, then maybe I'll finally get my f***ing end table.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
So I traveled to Ottawa, expecting to find some Canada nice. But their messaging was a bit more coarse. These trucks shut down businesses and made roads impassable. Can I go... Can I go around here? How do I... How do I get around? But how long were the protesters planning to paralyze Canada's 8th best city?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
It was a mix of hardcore anti-vaxxers, people who are okay with vaccines but hated the mandate, and then, of course, some people who put together a Joker costume once, loved the attention, so now that's pretty much all they do.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
I go by Brooklyn's Kindest on the CB. There you go.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
You're committed to being here for two years?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
How are you going to keep up the energy to be here for two years?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
Are you worried at all with weed, paranoia? No. That might creep in? No.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
No. Do you think the government is coming for you?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
So what exactly was the point of interrupting the supply chain?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
We're setting up essentially a truck barrier to keep everybody together so they can be united.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
Yeah, we might as well lock them in. Sort of like a parent who locks the door and says, you guys are in here until the water runs out, you become friends or democracy crumbles.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
That's a freedom that everyone should have. Is the Germany comparison a stretch here in Canada?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
Are you afraid of cultural appropriation? Probably. American cultural appropriation, because we use the German excuse all the time. Oddly enough, that wasn't the only thing Canadians were appropriating.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
To be honest, it wasn't even his. He stole it from another guy before him. I see the Q army on your head. Isn't Q the American thing trying to find JFK Jr.? Exactly, yeah.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
Okay, the Q thing might just be a fashion choice, but they're definitely reading the same internet as many Americans.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
You're afraid the government will sterilize you?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
Spending two weeks in the cab of a truck, pissing in a Mountain Dew can, can't be too good for the sperm production. Probably stare out of a wedding, so what's the difference? So Margaret Atwood audiobooks are apparently a thing with Canadian truckers. And while shutting down a city seems to have many obvious downsides... Hey, excuse me. Excuse me. Hi. Have you seen a Prius around here?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
Some see an opportunity coming from literal gridlock.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
This is essentially a tourist boom for Ottawa right now. You can feel the tourism in the air, right? You can smell it. It smells like amphetamines and drifter blood.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
What? What do you mean? Like, completely wiped out?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
The flood of 18-wheeler-driving tourists and their Canadian AF outfits created legitimate tension with residents of the city. The downtown was shut and there was palpable anger directed at local media.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
We're getting booed over here. We've been walking around here. There seems to be a real distrust of media here. Oh, for sure. There's a lot of cameras up in your face, cameras on cameras. And while Canadian authorities have finally enacted emergency measures to try to clear the convoy, so far the trucks are still there.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
And a well-funded, never-ending street party infused with misinformation and nationalism feels remarkably possible in our own land of the free. Where does this movement go from here?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
What does it mean their DNA is wiped out?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
It's going to come to America?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
You think this is inspiring the dickheads in America?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
This is inspiring the dickheads in America?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
Okay, if they do come to America, then maybe I'll finally get my f***ing end table. I'm in Johnson County, NC, marching with anti mask protesters to what has become America's new Thunderdome school board meetings. North Carolina parents are desperate to get their kids back into schools, but with packed ICUs and COVID cases in children four times what they were last year,
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
Because I would say, like, COVID wiped out 600,000 DNAs.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
New studies in the CDC are recommending masks as a way to keep in-person learning. But packed school board meetings and new stars of the right are upset because putting on a piece of cloth is just too much.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
What kind of issues has he had?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
So if you had to choose, No. What's wrong with having children wear masks in school?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
There's been some new studies that have come out both by the CDC and by even Duke University talking about masks being helpful, especially in a school situation.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
So there's science and then there's the smell test and you're going with the smell test.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
What are some of the ways kids suffer when they have to wear masks?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
Wearing a mask helps stop the spread of COVID in settings like a school.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
Well, we're outside right now. When you go inside, isn't it beneficial to wear a mask if you're close to someone?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
The science says it is helpful to wear a mask so it doesn't spread when you're in close proximity indoors.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
So some people are bewildered by science, both the practice and the word, but maybe scary images like full ICUs would have an impact. Wearing a mask, what's the harm?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
So many more than from the vaccine.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
Do you think not being able to see people's lower halves of face outweighs the dangers that COVID might pose to kids and communities?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
You have ICUs full of people suffering from COVID right now.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
Now I'm worried about COVID and security measures at North Carolina hospitals. Like so many of these school board battles, it was never about just one thing. but more of a general airing of grievances.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
Here in North Carolina, they don't need to learn about racism in school.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
It was hard to sum up the outrage of that afternoon. There were many thoughtful political statements being made. But looking around, it was difficult to miss the real catchphrase of the day.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
Well, you don't want to co-parent with the government. Don't get pregnant in Texas.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
Your kids go to private school?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
Isn't that kind of co-parenting with the government?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
Right. So you work with the government.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
You're in public school. So you do kind of co-parent with the government. In that regard, I guess, yeah. If you want to say my taxes pay for that, yeah. But you're giving back your child tax credit. This crowd that was ready to fight for what they believed in was using the power of democracy that was bestowed upon all of us by our founding fathers. Did you vote for school board?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
That's a lot of quotes. People from both sides of the issue came from far and wide to express their hate or love of vaccines.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
You could vote for somebody who reflects your values.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
But at the end of the day, they saw this as a fight against something much more disturbing than kids' face coverings.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
Wearing a mask is a sign of slavery.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
Good. Finally some good news.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
No fears, but a healthy belief in Satanism and its effect on the COVID.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
Vaccination is still going a bit slow in America, and we should be past this talk by now, but we're not, and it's definitely gonna come up at your holiday gatherings. So that you're prepared for those conversations, here is our gift to you. These are moments from past rallies we haven't shown before with some truly unique arguments from the vaccine-hesitant crowd.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
Right now in North Carolina, 92% of the people who are in the hospital because of COVID are unvaccinated. Does that worry you?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
No. Where nowadays can the unvaccinated congregate? Basically nowhere unless they form a group. Yeah, unless it's the ICU.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
That tends to be where many of the unvaccinated congregate. Okay, yeah.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
This is why I love doing interviews in New York. You're from Pennsylvania.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
A full ICU is just a full ICU. Kids need to see the lower half of other kids' faces.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
So your issue is that maybe they rushed this through too fast.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
Do you feel like it was an issue that America moved at warp speed?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
Who did you support in the last election?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
Do you think he deserves more credit for what he did with the vaccine?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
So Trump deserves more credit or less credit?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
Which is move the vaccine at warp speed. Which you were against like a second ago. Do you have a distrust about some of the narratives that are going on?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
Where are you getting your information about the vaccine?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
Where do you go for your information?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
How important is it like that to think ahead to protect something before it gets out of control?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
Specifically? What are you going to miss out on if this mandate prevents you from doing it?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
Comparing yourself to MLK are big words for a guy wearing 80s b-boy jeans.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
That's the empathy that the young Republicans bring. Thank you. Where are you getting your information?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
If you got to see the workers at Pfizer's make you a vaccine burrito, would you trust that? No. No.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
Tens of thousands of people? Where do you get that stat?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
Right. Like, that's why it's important for everybody to get a vaccine, squash it before it gets out of control.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
You feel like what's going on right now is back to 60s America?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
That's a crazy comparison. Asking people to get a COVID vaccine, Holocaust comparison, a little much. Jim Crow feels about right.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
When someone asks you what they can get you for Christmas, just tell them to get vaccinated.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
It's important that we take the vaccine, squash it, get curcumin.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
What were you talking about?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
What were you talking about?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
Well, you were just talking about getting ahead of it.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
The mandate is what's spreading.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
You see why I'm confused, though. Clearly, putting potentially harmful toxins into your body was something these anti-vax mandate health nuts were very concerned about.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
The Republicans of New York were clearly trying to move on from the past, and in some cases, forgetting it completely.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
Oh, he's a lower founding father.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
What are you going to miss out on if this mandate prevents you from doing it?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
If only the city had a seamless way to get food to their door, fresh, direct way to get there. Maybe that's it. Their point is this mandate is a slippery slope that only leads to... Hyperbole.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
Maybe you can help me out. I'm seeing signs that say vaccine mandates are fascism and also signs that say vaccine mandates are communism. Which one is it?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
It's both. Those are diametrically opposed ideologies.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
That's what's happening right now?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
Because you can't go to a concert?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
Do you think that's what it was like in Nazi Germany? People were bitching about not going to a gym? Regardless of our differences, this was still New York. A melting pot crammed onto an island, then pushed into a subway car with a rat eating pizza. You're not left or right. You're a new Yorker, and we're in this together.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
The we the people thing holds no sway for you.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
Who are the people of the We the People that you are willing to support?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
Which is a bummer because the Supreme Court has upheld it many times.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
All right, well, enjoy. I hope you don't get sick. Good luck to everyone out there and may you get the Patsy U our founding fathers said you deserve to eat inside during a global pandemic. The discussion around vaccines and mandates tends to pit red state versus blue. But I had heard there was vaccine hesitancy and misinformation in the elitist of the elite blue corners of the US.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
So I headed to a protest in sunny Southern California. I came to California curious if the anti-vax mandate crowd would talk to me. Then I realized I brought a camera and we're in Southern California. I think I'll be fine. Is this an anti-vaccination?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
What do you support? People's freedom of choice. Don't you benefit from a society that supports that by getting vaccinated?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
Polio is mandated for students going to school.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
I mean, there's 750,000 people who have a pretty good idea. Dig it. Do you trust the vaccine whatsoever?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
The vaccine is all about depopulation.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
So this is just Bill Gates' pet project to depopulate the globe.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
Which are who? No crew. It's a big claim to say there is a giant plan to kill half the population and not have a Thanos to point to. So why does the conversation on this SoCal boardwalk sound like a Shoney's in Lancaster, PA? I talked to Derek Barris, who's been tracking this coastal elite anti-vax movement for years.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
Bodily sovereignty sounds a lot like what I told my parents I was doing freshman year of high school.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
Yeah, this is my body, I can do what I want with it as often as I wanna do, wherever I want in the living room. You're still here. People hear about anti-vax and they think MAGA world, but now we're seeing this wellness, which we see maybe more to the left.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
Turns out ignoring the advice of the medical experts and sacrificing the health of the community at large could actually be quite profitable for the wellness business.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
You can breathe your way out of COVID.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
That's a class you can pay for.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
So, like, how many smoothies does one have to ingest to get to the point where they can completely disregard the health of the community they live in?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
I never knew there was that many parts of honey to ingest.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
I wanted to talk to these people, so I set up outside of the bougiest health food market in Venice Beach. And I also had a hankering for an activated charcoal bone broth rose hip smoothie cure-all. Are you vaccinated?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
Are you fearful of catching COVID?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
So what do you recommend for basic public health?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
Do you often take medical advice from a cat?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
From nature. What do you think of the COVID vaccine?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
Where did you hear this? A Siamese cat? You recommend for public health people meditating? Of course. People working out in groups? Definitely. Eating healthy? Definitely. COVID vaccine? No. No. Coffee enema? Possibly. Okay, maybe on the coffee enema. Definite hard no on the COVID vaccine. No. I'm not a anti-vaxxer per se. I'm a staunch anti-mandate person. Can I ask, are you both vaccinated?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
Normally when I'm in search of an angry mob of people screaming anti-science, deep state, vaccine, microchip, conspiracy jazz, I head to the heartland of America. But it turns out I can find those very same people right here in my own backyard in New York City. That's right.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
I can tell. Cold, but fair. Now, what say you, dude? I want to talk about wellness and public health. And trust me, we'll get to your script later. Can I ask you, are you vaccinated? I am. Do you find that most people in Los Angeles that you encounter are vaccinated?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
So if more Americans were dangled a trip to Tulum, we might get that vaccination rate up in the 90s? Maybe so, yeah. No matter what part of the anti-vax world they come from, there's one comparison they just can't resist making.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
And you're equating it to World War II era Germany.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
But, like, Jewish people are fleeing Poland because they can't get into gyms?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
But is that comparison, though... You just didn't get the point.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
Well, maybe historical dramas aren't big in L.A., but certainly there is commercial viability in saving humanity, right? We're in LA, maybe there's an elevator pitch here, right? So, zoom in on a country at war with itself, and then a magical cure comes along that helps people take care of the rest of their community by making a choice to help other people. Would you buy that ticket?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
Last week, outside of Mayor Bill de Blasio's home, there was a group protesting his new mandate that customers show proof of vaccination in order to enter restaurants, gyms, and theaters.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Klepper vs. Anti-Vaxxers
Three weeks ago, north of the border, a new kind of protest emerged. The trucker convoy has arrived in Ottawa.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
GOP Shills for Tesla, Trump Admin Flubs JFK File Release & DEI Scrubbing | Peter Wolf
Thank you, Michael. When we come back, Peter Wolff will be joining me on the show. Don't go away.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
GOP Shills for Tesla, Trump Admin Flubs JFK File Release & DEI Scrubbing | Peter Wolf
Welcome back to The Daily Show. My guest tonight is a legendary musician and artist who was the front man of the Jay Giles Band. His new memoir is called Waiting on the Moon. Please welcome Peter Wolfe. Thank you. Peter Wolf! Can I say, not only legendary frontman of the Jay Giles Band, auteur, but also now New York Times best-selling author, Peter Wolf. Is that right? Congratulations. Thank you.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
GOP Shills for Tesla, Trump Admin Flubs JFK File Release & DEI Scrubbing | Peter Wolf
Thank you very much. How does that feel?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
GOP Shills for Tesla, Trump Admin Flubs JFK File Release & DEI Scrubbing | Peter Wolf
Thank you very much. Jesus.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
GOP Shills for Tesla, Trump Admin Flubs JFK File Release & DEI Scrubbing | Peter Wolf
The best thing about half-empty is it's closer to a refill. There you go. That's pretty good, right? Oh! Well... Okay. Okay.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
GOP Shills for Tesla, Trump Admin Flubs JFK File Release & DEI Scrubbing | Peter Wolf
Oh, dear Lord. Can we get something from Kentucky in here, please? Oh, my God. We'll go blind, Peter.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
GOP Shills for Tesla, Trump Admin Flubs JFK File Release & DEI Scrubbing | Peter Wolf
Or should we just... Let's celebrate. Celebrate. Celebrate. Yeah, that tastes like Southwest Michigan, baby. Or what about Flint water? It's a little healthier than Flint water. I know. I have to say, as we're getting personal, this is a special moment to me in that the sounds in my household growing up were the sounds of the J. Giles Band.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
GOP Shills for Tesla, Trump Admin Flubs JFK File Release & DEI Scrubbing | Peter Wolf
Oftentimes Full House, oftentimes the Bloodshot album, and My father would come out singing bright and early on Saturday morning. And more often than not, he would sing you saying the phrase, take out your false teeth, mama. I want to suck on your gums. And I have you to thank for both that comedy and the little scar that it left on my heart.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
GOP Shills for Tesla, Trump Admin Flubs JFK File Release & DEI Scrubbing | Peter Wolf
You did, he came, yeah.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
GOP Shills for Tesla, Trump Admin Flubs JFK File Release & DEI Scrubbing | Peter Wolf
Mark Klepper, he's over there in the corner, yes. All the way from Calvin, Michigan. We gotta get him out. Can we get him out for one quick shake? You wanna get him out? Yeah, one quick shake. Mark Klepper, come on out here, this is my dad. Come on, come on. You wanna come out here?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
GOP Shills for Tesla, Trump Admin Flubs JFK File Release & DEI Scrubbing | Peter Wolf
Yes, yes. The more you say that something is real, the more people believe you. My real, real girlfriend lives in real Canada. She's just, not just sort of my girlfriend, she's my real girlfriend. She's real, and I touched her real boobies. By the way, what room is that? I feel like the beast must have Belle trapped in the room next door, right?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
GOP Shills for Tesla, Trump Admin Flubs JFK File Release & DEI Scrubbing | Peter Wolf
You brought down the house. I mean, it's... This book is great. I read this. You're sort of the Forrest Gump of music and culture of the last 50 years. You have chapters in here. They're little vignettes with Eleanor Roosevelt, Andy Warhol, John Lennon, Norman Rockwell, David Lynch. These little moments that you find yourself in. Why frame your experience through that lens?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
GOP Shills for Tesla, Trump Admin Flubs JFK File Release & DEI Scrubbing | Peter Wolf
A chapter that I loved is you talk about being in the Greenwich Village in the 60s, sort of as Dylan is coming up. And you're a little bit younger than Dylan. And sort of coming up and watching what was happening and being a part of that scene. What did that scene feel like? I think right now there's sort of this new focus on that era in music with the movie that came out.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
GOP Shills for Tesla, Trump Admin Flubs JFK File Release & DEI Scrubbing | Peter Wolf
But it seems so dynamic and yet so intimate at the same time.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
GOP Shills for Tesla, Trump Admin Flubs JFK File Release & DEI Scrubbing | Peter Wolf
Aretha Franklin.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
GOP Shills for Tesla, Trump Admin Flubs JFK File Release & DEI Scrubbing | Peter Wolf
But yes, Trump promised his presidency would be marked by competence. And now that we're two months in, let's see how that's going.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
GOP Shills for Tesla, Trump Admin Flubs JFK File Release & DEI Scrubbing | Peter Wolf
Smart move.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
GOP Shills for Tesla, Trump Admin Flubs JFK File Release & DEI Scrubbing | Peter Wolf
You're going to have to buy it, everyone, is what you're saying. Or go to the library. Go to the library to get it. What I love about some of these stories is it does feel like you have these wonderful stories with Muddy Waters and John Lee Hooker, and that essentially are you working your way into carrying musical equipment to get close to folks?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
GOP Shills for Tesla, Trump Admin Flubs JFK File Release & DEI Scrubbing | Peter Wolf
It feels as if music and also tradition was being passed shoulder to shoulder, literally, or perhaps Merlot to Merlot, whoever you're stealing liquor from. Bourbon to bourbon, yeah. In some ways, your book is like a testament to the art of hanging out.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
GOP Shills for Tesla, Trump Admin Flubs JFK File Release & DEI Scrubbing | Peter Wolf
Whoa, man, looks like 304556622 is really upset about that leak. Man, social security numbers, addresses, full names. The only thing that wasn't in the JFK papers was who killed JFK. And Trump's poor, poor lawyer. He's probably like, oh man, I never would have represented you in your 2020 election fraud case if I knew you'd be untrustworthy. But we can't be surprised.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
GOP Shills for Tesla, Trump Admin Flubs JFK File Release & DEI Scrubbing | Peter Wolf
Well, Peter, nothing but wonderful stories in this. Waiting on the Moon is available now. Peter Walsh, we're going to take a quick break. We'll be right back after this. That's our show for tonight. Now, here it is. Your moment is in.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
GOP Shills for Tesla, Trump Admin Flubs JFK File Release & DEI Scrubbing | Peter Wolf
Everything Trump has done so far has been sloppy. Whether it's Doge not knowing who they're firing, ICE not knowing who they're deporting. Turns out they can't even do a classic DEI purge right.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
GOP Shills for Tesla, Trump Admin Flubs JFK File Release & DEI Scrubbing | Peter Wolf
Oh. Don't blame us. Blame our racist software. We should have never used Chat KKK. Classic mistake. Classic mistake. Be careful where it is. The Jackie Robinson mistake wasn't even the most embarrassing anti-DEI flop.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
GOP Shills for Tesla, Trump Admin Flubs JFK File Release & DEI Scrubbing | Peter Wolf
That's how lazy they were with this. They just Control-F'd for gay-sounding keywords and deleted anything that showed up. Now, kids won't know about the Enola Gay, they won't know about transport planes, and they'll never hear about the heroic service of Captain Grinder McScissory. Tragic.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
GOP Shills for Tesla, Trump Admin Flubs JFK File Release & DEI Scrubbing | Peter Wolf
What's extra tragic is this could have all been avoided if they had just named the plane Enola Gay No Homo, you know? But maybe getting things right isn't this administration's top priority. They have a crisis on their hands. Tesla stock is in the toilet. And they can't let that happen. Crisis. They can't let that happen because Elon Musk is a key member of the Trump administration.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
GOP Shills for Tesla, Trump Admin Flubs JFK File Release & DEI Scrubbing | Peter Wolf
And more importantly, Republican Party sugar daddy. So, last night they sent Commerce Secretary Howard Lutnick to Fox News to make a pitch.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
GOP Shills for Tesla, Trump Admin Flubs JFK File Release & DEI Scrubbing | Peter Wolf
This is gross, a bit gross. Cabinet members should not be shilling for companies. And that includes those Henry Kissinger hymns.com ads. But to be fair, he wasn't just out there shilling Tesla stocks. The Commerce Secretary was pushing Elon products that hadn't hit the market yet.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
GOP Shills for Tesla, Trump Admin Flubs JFK File Release & DEI Scrubbing | Peter Wolf
Yeah! You hear that? People who don't buy a $30,000 robot that isn't on the market yet and will probably strangle you in your sleep. You're gonna look silly. These poor everyday Fox viewers must be so confused. They came here for the xenophobia and pretty ladies, and now they have to mortgage their house to buy a robot with a thigh gap.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
GOP Shills for Tesla, Trump Admin Flubs JFK File Release & DEI Scrubbing | Peter Wolf
It's so embarrassing that this guy is using his position on TV to sell shit to the American people. Why are you so hungry for muss approval when you should be hungry for a Taco Bell build-your-own-craving box? A Chalupa Supreme, a burrito, a side, and a drink for under seven bucks? It's called integrity. And it's how you live muss. You know, it's not just the Trump administration.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
GOP Shills for Tesla, Trump Admin Flubs JFK File Release & DEI Scrubbing | Peter Wolf
The whole team over at Fox News is doing their part.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
GOP Shills for Tesla, Trump Admin Flubs JFK File Release & DEI Scrubbing | Peter Wolf
Troy!
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
GOP Shills for Tesla, Trump Admin Flubs JFK File Release & DEI Scrubbing | Peter Wolf
Well, okay, whoa, whoa, Troy, Troy, are you running a charity for Elon Musk?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
GOP Shills for Tesla, Trump Admin Flubs JFK File Release & DEI Scrubbing | Peter Wolf
Okay, wait, no, no. Stop the music, please. Look, I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I just don't understand why it's our responsibility to help a man who's destroying his own brand with deeply unpopular policies.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
GOP Shills for Tesla, Trump Admin Flubs JFK File Release & DEI Scrubbing | Peter Wolf
No, Troy, Troy, sorry. No, stop. No, this is insane. Also, why is the number getting higher? I just don't get why Elon Musk's choices should be America's problem. Okay, you know what the real problem is? You keep f***ing interrupting me. Okay, all right, fine. I think it's on Elon to fix his own mess. But I'm sorry. Didn't mean to interrupt you.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
GOP Shills for Tesla, Trump Admin Flubs JFK File Release & DEI Scrubbing | Peter Wolf
Come on, Troy. Jordan, I am trying to help someone. Okay. It's bad enough that the executive branch of the U.S. government is devoted to hyping Elon's businesses. Shouldn't we help the less fortunate?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
GOP Shills for Tesla, Trump Admin Flubs JFK File Release & DEI Scrubbing | Peter Wolf
All right, you know what? Never mind. Troy Iwata, everybody. When we come back, we'll find out how to survive the end of the world. Don't go away.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
GOP Shills for Tesla, Trump Admin Flubs JFK File Release & DEI Scrubbing | Peter Wolf
Welcome back to The Daily Show. Everyone is worried about the world right now, but even with the Trump administration, there's only a 40% chance of an apocalypse, at most. But are you ready for that chance? Michael Kosta spoke to some people who are.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
GOP Shills for Tesla, Trump Admin Flubs JFK File Release & DEI Scrubbing | Peter Wolf
Welcome to The Daily Show. I'm George Blackmon. That's so much to talk about tonight. The DOD only wants hetero bomber jets. Jackie Robinson gets benched. And Republicans start a GoFundMe for the richest man on earth. So, let's get right into it. I'm going to cop it. Donald Trump made lots of promises during the presidential campaign, and he emphasized one thing in particular.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Gets "Hot" for Kennedy Center, RFK Confirmed, Eggflation Rampant | Brady Corbet
Welcome to The Daily Show. I am Jordan Klepper. We got so much to talk about tonight. Trump gets horny for the performing arts. Russia and Ukraine agree to couples therapy. And things are finally looking up for the measles. You know, congrats, guys. So let's get into another installment of the second coming of Donald J. Trump. I'm gonna come.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Gets "Hot" for Kennedy Center, RFK Confirmed, Eggflation Rampant | Brady Corbet
Thank you, Josh. When we come back, Randy Corbett will be joining me on the show. Don't go away.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Gets "Hot" for Kennedy Center, RFK Confirmed, Eggflation Rampant | Brady Corbet
Welcome back to The Daily Show. My guest tonight is a writer and director whose film The Brutalist is currently up for ten Oscar nominations. Please welcome Brady Corbett. Brady, I loved it. I loved the Brutalist. I really did. I thought, what a beautiful piece of art. Thank you so much.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Gets "Hot" for Kennedy Center, RFK Confirmed, Eggflation Rampant | Brady Corbet
Here's the thing that also I love. When I start talking to people about The Brutalist, more often than not, people come up to me like, did you know Laszlo Toth, the main character, is not a real person? Like, there seems to be a confusion. A lot of people think that it's based on a real Brutalist architect.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Gets "Hot" for Kennedy Center, RFK Confirmed, Eggflation Rampant | Brady Corbet
Let's start with the big news from Donald Trump's cabinet. Robert F. Kennedy Jr., Trump's nominee for health secretary and guy currently fighting a vulture for his lunch, has been officially confirmed. Now... I know. They said it couldn't be done. Excuse me. They said it shouldn't be done. But now it has happened. So you can now add employment to the list of things he's tested positive for.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Gets "Hot" for Kennedy Center, RFK Confirmed, Eggflation Rampant | Brady Corbet
And I can't tell whether that's a compliment for the world building that you do or just a commentary on American ignorance.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Gets "Hot" for Kennedy Center, RFK Confirmed, Eggflation Rampant | Brady Corbet
Yeah, yeah. When you started creating this story, what was the nugget? What was the thing that got you interested?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Gets "Hot" for Kennedy Center, RFK Confirmed, Eggflation Rampant | Brady Corbet
Yeah, well, I mean, you connect it also to the story, like the immigrant experience, right? I mean, one of the most evocative moments is that first shot, which is sort of someone coming forth upon Ellis Island and the Statue of Liberty. Right. How do you tie for somebody who doesn't? I mean, I'm as experts in brutalist architecture.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Gets "Hot" for Kennedy Center, RFK Confirmed, Eggflation Rampant | Brady Corbet
How would you tie for the layperson how, like, how brutalist architecture is connected to sort of the immigrant experience and what that says about sort of an American experience?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Gets "Hot" for Kennedy Center, RFK Confirmed, Eggflation Rampant | Brady Corbet
Now, it's interesting. This film, there's so many wonderful performances in it. There's a scene that really stuck with me. There's a scene when Adrian Brody gets off the train and he sees his cousin for the first time. And his cousin lets him know that his wife is still alive. And... They embrace, and the whole scene is shot so close, and there's so much physicality between the two of them.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Gets "Hot" for Kennedy Center, RFK Confirmed, Eggflation Rampant | Brady Corbet
They're touching each other's face the whole time. It's so intimate and real and emotional, and frankly, I'd never seen such a physical, intimate scene contextualize something like that. I'm curious, how do you direct something? Was the physicality and the closeness intentional in your direction there? How are you working with actors on something like that?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Gets "Hot" for Kennedy Center, RFK Confirmed, Eggflation Rampant | Brady Corbet
Is it true you didn't audition the actors, most of the actors, for their roles?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Gets "Hot" for Kennedy Center, RFK Confirmed, Eggflation Rampant | Brady Corbet
But let's move on to a big development in the war in Ukraine. And remember, during the campaign, Donald Trump made some big promises about how quickly and easily he was going to end that war.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Gets "Hot" for Kennedy Center, RFK Confirmed, Eggflation Rampant | Brady Corbet
They usually give me the one or two line parts. They're like, if you could just sip this Pepsi and say this one line, we'll see if you're right for the role. Yeah.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Gets "Hot" for Kennedy Center, RFK Confirmed, Eggflation Rampant | Brady Corbet
Yeah, yeah. Or maybe people you've met for the first time and have sort of a rapport with.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Gets "Hot" for Kennedy Center, RFK Confirmed, Eggflation Rampant | Brady Corbet
Absolutely. It happens. You made this movie. I mean, this movie is up for 10 Academy Award nominations, including Best Picture, Best Director, Best Screenplay. And rightfully so. It feels like a film. It's beautiful. You made it for $10 million? Yeah. My understanding is to make a film that people go and see, you have to spend $80 million to make something like that.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Gets "Hot" for Kennedy Center, RFK Confirmed, Eggflation Rampant | Brady Corbet
But this is a massive honking film for $10 million. What are these other films doing wrong?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Gets "Hot" for Kennedy Center, RFK Confirmed, Eggflation Rampant | Brady Corbet
Oh, yeah, totally. Classic 1950s misdivision.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Gets "Hot" for Kennedy Center, RFK Confirmed, Eggflation Rampant | Brady Corbet
Tell me more, Brady, about VistaVision and brutalist architecture.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Gets "Hot" for Kennedy Center, RFK Confirmed, Eggflation Rampant | Brady Corbet
We could never book Ariana Grande. You know what? It's funny. You joke about this, and it is true. This movie, I will say, I say this. I truly love this film. I hope you have nothing but success at the Academy Awards. On paper, nobody sees this film, right? Sure, yeah. It's three hours and... It's three and a half hours? Yeah, it's three hours and 35 minutes. There's an intermission in it.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Gets "Hot" for Kennedy Center, RFK Confirmed, Eggflation Rampant | Brady Corbet
It's about brutalist architecture made for under $10 million, right? It's a great pitch. It's a great pitch. LAUGHTER Shot on VistaVision, inspired by 1950s melodramatic cinema. This, up against the latest Marvel movie, is a tough pitch. But I would say what is fascinating is the experience, it feels like such an experience to go to it.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Gets "Hot" for Kennedy Center, RFK Confirmed, Eggflation Rampant | Brady Corbet
We had Francis Ford Coppola on this show, and he talked about his most recent film, and he really wanted to eventize It's like so many people are watching this at home now. And going to see it in the theater, experiencing the intermission with people at the theater, hearing people talk about it as they're getting popcorn, using the restroom. Like, it's changing.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Gets "Hot" for Kennedy Center, RFK Confirmed, Eggflation Rampant | Brady Corbet
It feels different than watching it at home. It feels different than watching just a regular hour and a half Marvel film. Do you think there might be some trend towards things that are a little bit longer, that intermission might be something that more?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Gets "Hot" for Kennedy Center, RFK Confirmed, Eggflation Rampant | Brady Corbet
I'm gonna do it back to the future and end this war before it even starts. Go back in time, kiss my mom, maybe have sex with her. What am I talking about? What was I talking about? So here we are, one month into that first 24 hours, and Donald Trump is finally ready to negotiate.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Gets "Hot" for Kennedy Center, RFK Confirmed, Eggflation Rampant | Brady Corbet
Thank you for being here.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Gets "Hot" for Kennedy Center, RFK Confirmed, Eggflation Rampant | Brady Corbet
But it's going to be tough, which is why he started out with a quick warm-up negotiation first, an old-fashioned prisoner swap with Russia. Let's see how it went.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Gets "Hot" for Kennedy Center, RFK Confirmed, Eggflation Rampant | Brady Corbet
What? You traded a cybercrime kingpin for public school teacher Mark Fogle? This is like if the Dallas Mavericks traded Luka Doncic for public school teacher Mark Fogel. I mean, at least the teacher we got back is the cool teacher. He smokes weed and he's been to jail. I mean, you know, you know he's showing movies in fourth period. Also, Americans, stop smoking weed in Russia.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Gets "Hot" for Kennedy Center, RFK Confirmed, Eggflation Rampant | Brady Corbet
If you need to relax, try not being in Russia. Okay, now that Trump got all warmed up, it's time for the main event.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Gets "Hot" for Kennedy Center, RFK Confirmed, Eggflation Rampant | Brady Corbet
I'd like to know what those various other subjects were. I mean, it's a tad suspicious. It's like a husband coming back from a Vegas bachelor party saying, yeah, we ate some great food, we saw the sphere, did various other things. Anyway, you should get a prescription for Valtrex. So, Trump has now set the stage for face-to-face negotiations with Putin on the future of Ukraine.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Gets "Hot" for Kennedy Center, RFK Confirmed, Eggflation Rampant | Brady Corbet
But Trump won't be going into this alone. He also has Defense Secretary Pete Hegseth, a man who does not take no for an answer, according to police reports. So, get ready, Putin, because you're about to face the toughest negotiations of your life.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Gets "Hot" for Kennedy Center, RFK Confirmed, Eggflation Rampant | Brady Corbet
Okay. So, before negotiations even start, America gave up the two things Russia most wants? I mean, how do Hank Seth and Trump not know how to negotiate? Between the two of them, they've been divorced 97 times. I mean, if your opening move is giving away the house, the car, and the kids, best case scenario, you're leaving court with half of a golden retriever.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Gets "Hot" for Kennedy Center, RFK Confirmed, Eggflation Rampant | Brady Corbet
I mean, no one's gonna be happy with that, except for maybe RFK Jr. But... I guess there's still plenty of stuff to negotiate. For example, you know, which animal will Zelensky be fed to once the Russians take over? Probably a lion, but could be a shark, you know? There's room there. Whichever animal it is, it'll probably fall out of a window.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Gets "Hot" for Kennedy Center, RFK Confirmed, Eggflation Rampant | Brady Corbet
Regardless, Trump is not going to go driving a hard bargain on Ukraine's behalf, and that's fine. But as long as Ukraine is an equal member of this peace process, they'll get some of what they want.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Gets "Hot" for Kennedy Center, RFK Confirmed, Eggflation Rampant | Brady Corbet
Yikes. That's like when my dentist asks if I floss. That's an interesting question. I gotta go. Okay, so this is not looking good for Ukraine. Imagine not even being invited to your own peace negotiations. It's like if your wife told you she wanted a threesome and then asked what night she'll be away on business. Have so much fun, sweetie. I'm strong enough for this.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Gets "Hot" for Kennedy Center, RFK Confirmed, Eggflation Rampant | Brady Corbet
It's okay, I had it coming after Vegas. Now, you might think it's unfair to put Ukraine in this position after they were the ones invaded, but that's not exactly how Trump sees things.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Gets "Hot" for Kennedy Center, RFK Confirmed, Eggflation Rampant | Brady Corbet
Not a good war to go into? They were invaded. It wasn't their idea. Little advice for the back of Abraham Lincoln's head. Don't get hit by a bullet. Not smart. Look. Here. Clearly, this is going to be a complex negotiation, and it couldn't have come at a worse time for Trump, because he's also busy with his second job.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Gets "Hot" for Kennedy Center, RFK Confirmed, Eggflation Rampant | Brady Corbet
Last week, he declared himself the chairman of Washington's Kennedy Center for the Arts, the government's premier arts institution. And if you're thinking, wait, Trump is completely unqualified to think about art, don't worry. He brought along an equally unqualified board to help him out.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Gets "Hot" for Kennedy Center, RFK Confirmed, Eggflation Rampant | Brady Corbet
Okay, okay. First of all, what's up with this photo? Oh, you need a headshot of Mr. Scavito? Unfortunately, the only picture that exists of him is from when he walked in on his parents bumping uglies. But hey, Donald Trump loves arts and entertainment, and you could hear his genuine passion in a phone call he had with the board.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Gets "Hot" for Kennedy Center, RFK Confirmed, Eggflation Rampant | Brady Corbet
I'm sorry. Hot? Only Trump would look at a building and go, eh, un- Yeah. Performing arts centers have gotten very wokey. Like that theater that kicked out Lauren Boebert for giving one little tug job. F***ing blocking it over the khaki jack session. Not in my America. You heard Trump, though. No more woke theater. Only plays written by straight men like... Tennessee Williams? Damn it! So close.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Gets "Hot" for Kennedy Center, RFK Confirmed, Eggflation Rampant | Brady Corbet
Okay, so what will Trump's new role mean for the Kennedy Center? We at The Daily Show just got our hands on an exclusive look at what we can expect. The Kennedy Center, America's most prestigious home for the highest arts, is about to get hot. Hot!
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Gets "Hot" for Kennedy Center, RFK Confirmed, Eggflation Rampant | Brady Corbet
Arthur Miller. Arthur Miller. When we come back, Josh Johnson ruins the most important meal of the day. Don't go away.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Gets "Hot" for Kennedy Center, RFK Confirmed, Eggflation Rampant | Brady Corbet
Welcome back to The Daily Show. Donald Trump campaigned on lowering egg prices, but he's been president for almost 14 years now, and eggs just hit their highest price yet. Which raises the question, how are New Yorkers handling the expense? Josh Johnson hit the streets to find out.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Tariffs Send Markets Plunging, Penguins Waddling to a Trade War | Scott Glenn
Yeah. Ryan Glenn's questions are so good, they're actually just statements. You know what? It's all a clever setup, like a hunter setting a trap. Butter him up and then hit him hard. Show them how it's done, Brian.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Tariffs Send Markets Plunging, Penguins Waddling to a Trade War | Scott Glenn
Thank you very much. Oh, amazing reportage. The way you know you're speaking truth to power is when power tells you, what a great question. It's like if Frost Nixon was just Nixon. And these days, Brian Glenn is showing he'll chase down a story no matter where it takes him, from the streets to the sheets.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Tariffs Send Markets Plunging, Penguins Waddling to a Trade War | Scott Glenn
Brian Glenn from Real America's Voice. He is the boyfriend of Marjorie Taylor Greene.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Tariffs Send Markets Plunging, Penguins Waddling to a Trade War | Scott Glenn
I'll see you later for the sex. Man, can you feel that erotic heat, you know? Violating journalistic ethics by not disclosing you're sleeping with the politician you're interviewing is wrong. I don't want to be right. And man, think about this. Think about this relationship. What does Marjorie Taylor Greene hate most in the world? Jews, maybe. But right after that, reporters and drag queens.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Tariffs Send Markets Plunging, Penguins Waddling to a Trade War | Scott Glenn
And Brian Glenn is both. You know what? That's... That's the power of good journalism. It doesn't just change minds. It changes hearts. So kudos to you, Brian Glenn. You went from embarrassing yourself on local news to embarrassing all of us on the national stage. But, hey, at least you wore a suit. I'm Jordan Klepper. Good night, and seriously, good f***ing luck.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Tariffs Send Markets Plunging, Penguins Waddling to a Trade War | Scott Glenn
Tonight, we highlight a journalist who has quickly established himself as the new paragon of the free press, chief White House correspondent for Real America's Voice, Brian Glenn, who recently made a name for himself when he pressed Ukrainian President Zelensky on a matter of global importance.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Tariffs Send Markets Plunging, Penguins Waddling to a Trade War | Scott Glenn
Thank you. Thank you. Finally, the questions that matter. Now, most lamestream reporters would never dream of asking a question like that. They'd call it stupid or unnecessary or Jesus Christ, Brian, the man's fighting for his country's survival. What kind of f***ing question is that? I don't know. I don't know. You know, that is not Glenn's style.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Tariffs Send Markets Plunging, Penguins Waddling to a Trade War | Scott Glenn
And if this was your first time hearing about Brian Glenn, then good sir, you need to accept your uncle's Facebook friend request. Glenn got his start in Dallas, Texas, where he honed his craft covering the most dangerous stories. All right, do I just jump in? One, two, three. Oh, this is inviting me to go dance.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Tariffs Send Markets Plunging, Penguins Waddling to a Trade War | Scott Glenn
Yes. Now there's a man who knows how to dress appropriately for work. Take notes, Zelinsky. It's right here. Glenn has proved time and time again that good journalism comes down to grit, heart, proximity to horses, and, above all, costumes. I'm kicking these shoes off, but I may keep the pantyhose on. It does feel kind of good, actually. Wow. Wow. What courage. What bravery.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Tariffs Send Markets Plunging, Penguins Waddling to a Trade War | Scott Glenn
I mean, dressing in drag in Texas. I mean, reporters haven't put their asses on the line like that since Saigon. So, naturally, it was only a matter of time before Glenn was hired by Right Side Broadcasting Network, which is as legitimate as it sounds. And it was there at RSBN where he combined his love of human interest stories with his hate of most of human beings.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Tariffs Send Markets Plunging, Penguins Waddling to a Trade War | Scott Glenn
Wow. I love hearing about women's looks from a guy whose general vibe is sunburnt divorcee who's no longer allowed at his kids' t-ball games. Yes. You know what? There's something here. There's something right here. People don't want spin. They want reporters to deliver unbiased, fact-based, hard news about which voters they bang.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Tariffs Send Markets Plunging, Penguins Waddling to a Trade War | Scott Glenn
And it was these hot takes that brought Glenn all the way from the campaign trail to the steps of Air Force One.