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Chapter 2: What is Groundhog Day and how is it celebrated?
It's Groundhog Day! Yeah! And also, what the hell is Groundhog Day? This is such a strange thing to explain to anyone who doesn't live here. People pull a rodent out of the ground and then ask the animal to predict the weather. You know what? This is so unfair. Because if Africans were doing this and you heard that we pulled animals out of the ground, how would you be judging us?
I mean, you realize there are villages in Africa where people wear animal skin. And if I tried to explain that Americans use groundhogs to predict the weather, they'd probably be like, but why not use satellite data, huh? Why not?
And now for our continuing coverage of Groundhog Day 99. Yee-haw. The rodent less taken. Today was Groundhog Day and weathermen across the country took a break from using state-of-the-art Doppler radar to get their forecasts wrong and instead turned to a rabid marmot that eats its own stool.
Chapter 3: How do different commentators describe Groundhog Day?
In Pennsylvania, thousands of spectators waited all night in the rain to see the world's most famous groundhog, Punxsutawney Phil. Phil did not see his shadow this year, but as usual, did set eyes on a whole bunch of people dumb enough to stand in the rain all night to watch a soggy rodent get pulled out of the dirt.
In Nebraska, Unadillo the groundhog did see his shadow this morning, forecasting six more weeks of brutal winter weather, which is bad news for Midwesterners who look forward to an early spring so they can get a jump on the hot, muggy summers that bring tornadoes and flooding. Not yet.
And because they can't go a single day without making children cry, PETA spokesman Dan Matthews objected to the treatment of the groundhogs, saying, quote, this poor creature is dragged into the daylight with people screaming at him. You only have to look into his eyes to see how bewildered he is.
Chapter 4: What criticisms does PETA have about Groundhog Day?
Matthews reportedly then added, much like I am, every time I'm told to stop alienating people at parties with my freakish obsession with animals. Matthews went on to say, quote, these animals haven't volunteered their services and should be left in peace. True.
But Dan was unable to then explain how an animal who genuinely wanted to would go about volunteering for a yearly experiment to predict the weather. And that was our continuing coverage of Groundhog Day 99.
Chapter 5: What is The Daily Show's take on Groundhog Day?
Tomorrow is Groundhog Day, which leads me to ask, what the hell is Groundhog Day? Have you looked into this? People pull a rodent out of the ground and then ask the animal to predict the weather, which is so unfair because if Africans were doing this shit and you heard that we pulled animals out of the ground, think about what you'd say about it.
There are villages in Africa where people wear animal skin, and if I tried to explain that Americans use groundhogs to predict the weather, they'd be like, but why not use satellite data, huh?
February 2nd, 2011. On Comedy Central's World News Headquarters in New York, this is The Daily Show with Jon Stewart.
As you know, today is Groundhog's Day, which means we get to find out how much longer this brutal winter will last. We're going to quickly take a look at the photo of Puxatawney Phil to see if he saw his shadow. And, oh, that's not good. Guess that means six more years of winter, and we're gonna need to do Groundhog.
Saturday was Groundhog Day, which leads me to ask, what the hell is Groundhog Day? This is insane. People pull a rodent out of the ground, and then they ask the animal to predict the weather.
This is so unfair, because if Africans were doing shit like this, and you heard that we pulled animals out of the ground, like, there are villages in Africa where people wear animal skin, and if I try to explain that Americans use groundhogs to predict the weather, they'd be like, ah, but why not use the satellite data? Ah, what's going on in America?
February 3rd, 2015. From Comedy Central's World News Headquarters in New York, this is The Daily Show with Jon Stewart.
Oh, it's another kind of cold and, I'm going to say, day here in the Northeast. Kind of a lot of them. How much longer are we going to have to put up with this?
The rough winter weather is not over. That prediction, not from the National Weather Service, but from a rodent in Pennsylvania.
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