Jesse Waters
Appearances
IHIP News
How MAGA and Russia Successfully DISMANTLED OUR DEMOCRACY
It's not really the same. Dana, we are waging a 21st century information warfare campaign against the left, and they are using tactics from the 1990s. They are holding tiny press conferences, tiny little rallies. They're screaming into the ether on MSNBC. This is what you call top-down command and control.
IHIP News
How MAGA and Russia Successfully DISMANTLED OUR DEMOCRACY
You get your talking points from a newspaper, and you put it on the broadcast network, and then it disappears. What you're seeing on the right is asymmetrical. It's like grassroots guerrilla warfare. Someone says something on social media, Musk retweets it, Rogan podcasts it, Fox broadcasts it, and by the time it reaches everybody, millions of people have seen it. It's free money.
IHIP News
How MAGA and Russia Successfully DISMANTLED OUR DEMOCRACY
And we're actually talking about expressing information. They are suppressing information.
Pod Save America
Just Another Orange Monday
Losing money costs you nothing. This is just the reality of life. Like, were you young and dumb? How much money did you lose? Everyone loses money. Everyone loses money. It costs you nothing. In fact, it builds quite a bit of character. In fact, you learn a lot of lessons, actually.
Pod Save America
The Pundies: Worst Takes of 2024
The oldest president in history just got a little older. It's Joe Biden's birthday. The big 82 for the big guy and primetime would wish him a happy birthday, but we have rules here. Men don't wish men happy birthdays.
Savage Lovecast
Savage Lovecast Episode 938
Hey Dan, Magnum Sub here. I've been dating this guy for about four months now. He's an international PhD student in my town. We've talked at great length about his home life back at home in Ghana. We have spent a fair amount of time together like anyone would when they're first dating.
Savage Lovecast
Savage Lovecast Episode 938
I would like to spend a little bit more time with him, but respect his busy school, work, and side hustle schedule. I just happened to send him a funny reel saying, when your man is too busy, maybe you should ask him if he's married. Well, come to find out, he is. He's from Ghana, and his wife and his four-year-old son both live there.
Savage Lovecast
Savage Lovecast Episode 938
He is trying to support them as well as himself here, so I respect that. We did talk about all this in a very civilized manner. He explained to me that it was just expected culturally that when they got out of college that they would get married, and therefore they did. It was asked of him from his father, and so he committed to marrying her. They have never lived together.
Savage Lovecast
Savage Lovecast Episode 938
They've actually only lived in separate countries most of the time they've actually been married. Culturally, I do know this is an expectation, and I can respect traditions and culture. He stated that he wasn't sure if he would get a divorce or not. He's not sure if he's really even given the marriage a real shot. He just wanted to see what the future holds and go from there.
Savage Lovecast
Savage Lovecast Episode 938
The problem is, now what? I feel kind of betrayed that he didn't tell me all this up front. He said he wanted to, but he didn't want me to think less of him or treat him differently. I care for him, but I also can't wait around for him either. I am looking for something long term.
The Ben Shapiro Show
Ep. 2136 - No More TRANSING The Military!
Wow, wow, wow. Look at this crowd. Elon Musk, where are you? Bring your ass over here so you can see who's here and what we're doing. We're not afraid of you. We know that you are the co-president now of the United States of America. He's a thief. He's a gangster. He brings his billionaire friends along with him because they think that they can take over this country.
The Ben Shapiro Show
Ep. 2136 - No More TRANSING The Military!
And Trump has said, you give me enough money, you can have it.
The Ben Shapiro Show
Ep. 2173 - FALLOUT: Stock Market Drops, Trump Pushes On
Now, we're not going to have all factories come back like clothing manufacturing. That's tough to bring back. But what kind of manufacturing are you talking about returning here?
The Ben Shapiro Show
Ep. 2148 - The Epstein File Release FIASCO
You said last week that you have the Epstein files on your desk. When can we see them and what's taking so long to release them?
The Five
The Five 05-21-2025
You presided over the destruction of the health of the American people. Our people are now the sickest people in the world because you have not done your job seriously. That is an amazing... What have you done about it? What have you done about the epidemic of chronic disease? Mr. Secretary... What have you done about the epidemic of chronic disease?
The Five
The Five 05-14-2025
McGregor. Hello, everybody. I'm Jesse Waters, along with Kennedy, Harold Ford Jr., Dana Perino, and Greg Gutfeld. It's 5 o'clock in New York City, and this is The Five. Democrats are ready to throw down to protect the bad hombres.
The Five
The Five 05-14-2025
You're all high and mighty with the Mideast, but you don't act that way with China. I'm the one that acts that way with China. You love China, you hate tariffs, and you want to do business with these people.
The Five
The Five 05-14-2025
Just rewind it. Just put you in with them. And Dana is so right. What he's trying to do is create a peace and prosperity framework in this region so we can pivot away from it, go back to the Western Hemisphere, and realign ourselves into the Near East. Listen.
The Five
The Five 05-14-2025
If you peel Syria away from Russia and you lift sanctions and then you cut a nuke deal with the Iranians and lift the embargo and get the oil back online and tell the Saudis to pump more oil, it drives the price of oil down. It starves the war machine in Russia and forces Putin to negotiate with Zelensky. Then you sell chips and arms to the Saudis and you get these guys to do business with Israel.
The Five
The Five 05-14-2025
You step back up. with the Abraham Accords so everybody can trade with each other and trade with us. And then we all get rich. The only thing hanging up this thing is the Hamas situation. If Netanyahu can settle this thing, then the Saudis will come on board and we can all be fine. And on the plane, Harold, he's going to take the plane. And then you guys are going to do nothing about it.
The Five
The Five 05-14-2025
And the press is going to ride on it. And then if you win in the midterms, you're going to impeach him. So what? OK, and then Kamala is going to win and she's not going to go on the new jet. She's going to go on the one for 1990. That's because Boeing can't get it together.
The Five
The Five 05-14-2025
Worse than Ikea furniture. If Trump invites you to fly on the plane, you're going, Greg. I'm not going on a cutter jet. Yeah, you are. Hey, Greg, come to Mar-a-Lago. You're going in your face, Greg.
The Five
The Five 05-14-2025
And we're getting a very big update for nobody's above the law crowd. A federal grand jury returning a two-count indictment against a Milwaukee County judge who allegedly helped an illegal immigrant evade ICE agents waiting to arrest him outside a courtroom. All right, Dana, the threats from Hakeem and AOC, are those credible threats?
The Five
The Five 05-14-2025
We don't expect an apology. A lot of people don't know this. Greg is in a wheelchair. Have you ever seen him stand up? No, we are. We put him in a wheelchair right now. I see it right now. Exactly. All right. So what's the Democrats message, Dana? Is it a Maryland dad? Is it eggs? What is it? No one knows. No one cares. The other thing is.
The Five
The Five 05-14-2025
Why are we paying consultants to tell them to say stuff still after all these years? You're paying a guy a million dollars to say we're looking forward. What was this guy doing? Yeah, you can't change the past. No. Looking forward. Here's your invoice. Good luck with that. The media is not even buying it. This guy tried it on CNN.
The Five
The Five 05-14-2025
They were like, oh, no, well, you got to look backwards because no one's going to trust you guys ever again. And this is about trust. How do they regain their trust back? Well, if you say you didn't notice anything, you're a liar. If you say you noticed something about Joe but didn't do anything, you're a coward.
The Five
The Five 05-14-2025
If you admit kind of that you knew he was shot, but you didn't say anything because you wanted to beat Trump so badly, then you're just a conniving, manipulative, power hungry, sketchy politician. So wherever they go, they're toast. This is like January 6th with Republicans. They were asked for four years about that day. Was the election stolen? Was January 6th horrible?
The Five
The Five 05-14-2025
And they all individually had to come up with the right answer. Some say the FBI set it up. Some say it was a horrible day. Trump said it was the most beautiful day of the year. But they were all forced to come to terms with it. And that's what every Democrat needs to do. They need to be asked about Biden's health and needed to be on record on it. That's how you gain trust back.
The Five
The Five 05-14-2025
But what about the media? You're leaving out the you took care of the media. I'm taking care of the Democrats.
The Five
The Five 05-14-2025
Well, he told me to shove a tampon where the sun don't shine. And I've invited him on the show, and he's too afraid to come on. So I don't know what the problem is there. And I want to have tampon on, too, but he's not man enough to come on. I'll even give him a milkshake if he comes on. So he's invited.
The Five
The Five 05-14-2025
But what happened was under Barack Obama, the party shifted from middle class to like postgrads. And all these postgrads, they worship these professors. And all these professors don't talk for normal people. They talk to impress other professors, just like the journalists do their jobs to impress other journalists. And they use words like intersectionality and oligarchy.
The Five
The Five 05-14-2025
No one knows what the hell they're talking about because they're just trying to look smarter than they really are. So they get into this world of theory. Right. And these theories don't work. Communism, queer theory, feminism, none of this stuff actually works in the real world. And so it hits reality.
The Five
The Five 05-14-2025
And then all the professors are like, OK, well, like, we're just going to go to the other room, like let you guys suffer the consequences of all this garbage. And that's where we are now. We're suffering from the consequences of stupid professors and people trying to impress these stupid professors. And we just need to get back to James Carville Democrats. Yeah.
The Five
The Five 05-14-2025
Tough-talking libs are rushing to defend the demsurrectionist trio who stormed that New Jersey ICE facility that holds suspected murderers, child rapists, and MS-13 gangbangers. Homeland Security says more arrests are coming, but now Hakeem and AOC are warning everyone not to lay a finger on their crew or else.
The Five
The Five 05-14-2025
I never even thought the government should have mandated seatbelts in cars.
The Five
The Five 05-14-2025
You give them one thing and then they want to put everything in the car. What's next? What are they going to put an abortion clinic in every car? See, Harold, you got to stand strong.
The Five
The Five 05-14-2025
Wait, they were Haitians? No. Allegedly. We have not confirmed those reports. Jesse. Just kidding, Haitians. We love you. Tonight, let's just go to what we're going to show you now. The Five has a podcast. It's about darn time, people. Listen, after the show airs here, you can now download it and listen to the whole audio.
The Five
The Five 05-14-2025
Apple, Spotify, Fox News, podcast dot com. It's our own podcast. You idiot. It's us. They make this a podcast. It's not a podcast. You're complicating everything.
The Five
The Five 05-14-2025
All right. Don't ruin it any more than it already is ruined. Johnny caught up with Clooney. No.
The Five
The Five 05-14-2025
What happens if they were to go and arrest these members or if they would try to sanction them during the House of Representatives? They'll find out. What would you do? I mean, it's a red line.
The Five
The Five 05-14-2025
Democrats during the pandemic should have tried to break open schools that were closed. They shouldn't be trying to break open ICE facilities now.
The Five
The Five 05-14-2025
No, you don't. It's not my move. Hard on your knees. Just not on the show. Up next, President Trump racks up trillions in deals for Americans as he marvels at the Middle East.
The Five
The Five 05-14-2025
But before there was the New Jersey Ice Center, there was the Maryland dad, DHS Secretary Kristi Noem, on Capitol Hill smacking Fang Fang's ex-lover for playing a gotcha on Abrego Garcia.
The Five
The Five 05-27-2025
I said I'm from the front pew of a wooden white church, a courthouse pocket steel.
The Five
The Five 05-20-2025
I remember when Jessica said public opinion was shifting after the MSG rally. Remember, that was going to send the election to Kamala's court. Kill Tony was too funny. How'd that happen for you guys? I don't believe you when you say public opinion shifting.
The Five
The Five 05-20-2025
You're not allowed to conduct congressional oversight like this. Now, it doesn't mean you can just barge into any federal facility. OK. So you're saying House Republicans could just break into the Department of Justice and start rummaging through files looking for the fast and furious evidence? Is that OK? We could just break into any federal facility we want and start looking around.
The Five
The Five 05-20-2025
That's not how it works, Jessica. I wish you were a lawyer so you would know better. They thought they could get away with it because they've been breaking the law and getting away with it for years. That day is over. They think these people at Biden's Justice Department are afraid of a little controversy.
The Five
The Five 05-20-2025
They think Cash, Bongino, Bondi, Pirro, Alina Haba are afraid of what the media is going to say if they arrest a Democrat for breaking the law. You guys have no idea how much fun we're having. This is a dream. come true. Jessica, you started this. You raided Trump's house. You put shackles on Navarro.
The Five
The Five 05-20-2025
People were walking around the Capitol peacefully and patriotically, and they're in prison for two years.
The Five
The Five 05-20-2025
She broke the law on camera. With a few forearm shivers, this linebacker really put her weight into it, Jessica. There's nowhere to run and there's nowhere to hide. You're having margaritas with MS-13 and you're trying to bust out illegal alien rapists from prison. And you think the public backs you? Trump survived lawfare because he had a lot of cash. Does MacGyver have money?
The Five
The Five 05-20-2025
Is she going to ask Democrat donors to pony up for her lawyers to fight federal charges? The donors are tapped out, Jessica. Hakeem's not going to pay for this. She is going to lose and she's going to lose big.
The Five
The Five 05-20-2025
Kennedy, the media is handling this Biden cover-up in a funny way. There's factions that are breaking off. Explain how people are dealing with this.
The Five
The Five 05-20-2025
You're asking me? You know what I'm going to say. No, he probably won't. And that's fine. But real men do not take pictures of seashells. And then when they get in trouble, blame their wives. Real men don't tip off CNNs to get photos of them leaving for their Secret Service interview. Real men don't create fake drama to drum up book sales. And he wrote a book about what?
The Five
The Five 05-20-2025
Two women heroes saving New York City from right wing extremists. Real men don't write books like that. Real men don't go on MSNBC under any circumstance. It is a faculty lounge for feds, racists and conspiracy theorists. I'm with Greg. I think the guy's a fruitcake. Yeah.
The Five
The Five 05-20-2025
Because Trump populism breathed new life into the party. And that's how you have to let it do. These parties are like living, breathing organisms. You've got to nurture them. You have to water them. You have to let them flourish. When Trump populism came onto the scene, a little resistance at first. But, you know, he kind of worked his way up and won two of the last three elections.
The Five
The Five 05-20-2025
Bernie's populism comes onto the scene and they acid wash him. They destroy them. They stunt the growth. And it creates a lot of animosity. And it actually moves Bernie bros over to the right. You just have to let the Bernie populism run its course organically, debate it, maybe test it out in a general election, see what happens. If it crashes and burns, you learn something.
The Five
The Five 05-20-2025
If it does well, like Trump surprised everybody in 16, they were like, oh, whoa, maybe we can work with this. But they just have to let the people speak for once, Jessica.
The Five
The Five 05-20-2025
I was on his side. I don't care if Denzel slept with that guy's wife. He was just so in his face with his finger. I felt like I was in the movies.
The Five
The Five 05-20-2025
Well, there's time. I should get my prostate checked. Yes. I just want to say I'm sorry to Jessica for telling her to shut up. Thank you. It was just the quickest way for me to get her off my back. And then I thought, you know, Greg says in your face, Harold, maybe I should make shut up Jessica a thing. You should. Shut up, Jessica. Oh, I love it. An apology turned into a new slay. Sorry.
The Five
The Five 05-20-2025
Tonight, Jesse Waters primetime. Johnny caught up. Johnny caught up with Comey. Watch. Why are you on an 86 Trump? All right. Director?
The Five
The Five 05-20-2025
Oh, that goes on for about another minute. Oh, really? Yeah, pretty awkward. That's a tease.
The Five
The Five 05-20-2025
He popped up at four separate camera stakeouts to close the deal and, of course, couldn't resist but to comment on the Biden cover up.
The Five
The Five 05-20-2025
Jessica, they're saying they never tested his prostate for cancer in the last 10 years. Do you believe that?
The Five
The Five 05-20-2025
Hello, everybody. I'm Jesse Waters, along with Kennedy, Jessica Tarloff, Martha McCallum and Greg Gutfeld. Five o'clock in New York City, and this is The Five. President Trump blitzing Capitol Hill to save the day on the big, beautiful bill and smacking Republican holdouts in the line.
The Five
The Five 05-20-2025
And then after about two weeks... The media who blew their credibility by participating in the cover-up are loudly telling people there's nothing to see here.
The Five
The Five 05-20-2025
Ahead, President Trump goes off on the ICE attacking Democrat who just got charged. Hear what he said next.
The Five
The Five 05-20-2025
According to a spokesman, Joe Biden's last known prostate specific antigen test was in 2014. And his first cancer diagnosis was last Friday. Meanwhile, Joe Scarborough is saying, F you if you dare call him Biden's lapdog.
The Five
The Five 05-13-2025
He never even had a plan for the second term, never even touched on it. He talked about they don't want this region exporting terrorism. They want exporting technology. What did you think of that?
The Five
The Five 05-13-2025
Well, it's because the Trump family has a business. The Biden family didn't have you can't compare the two.
The Five
The Five 05-13-2025
You know what else the Saudis should export? The sandals. McDonald's on wheels. Why don't we have that here? Come on, guys.
The Five
The Five 05-13-2025
Oh, yeah, you're right. Up next, old Democrats are trying to crush the youth rebellion by tying up the hog.
The Five
The Five 05-13-2025
Did him in. Barack, remember, told him to write the op-ed. Clooney doesn't do anything. That was Denzel Washington. Denzel. He's the black actor, right? Yes. Okay, good. So wheelchairs, there's nothing wrong with wheelchairs. I use them all the time at the airport. Okay. You don't even have to have a doctor's note. You could just say you're late and they'll wheel you around.
The Five
The Five 05-13-2025
You give them 20 bucks. It's fine. We were just talking about what we would have called Joe if he was in a wheelchair. Asleep at the wheel.
The Five
The Five 05-13-2025
Thank you for reminding me. And thank you for reminding the audience. You can still get that on Amazon right now. So the DNC has these gender diversity quotas and a Native American lady complained. So they had a vote. They canceled the vote. And then they called Trump a dictator. I disagree with Greg a little bit on this. You have to have skin in the game. This guy, Hogg, backs affirmative action.
The Five
The Five 05-13-2025
He's a radical feminist. He has white privilege. He should renounce the white privilege, do a stolen land acknowledgement and let the lady from. The reservation or wherever she lives, take the seat. That's what they're asking us to do. They're constantly imposing their gender diversity quotas on us. But then when it's them, they're like, oh, you can't do this to me. Oh, yes, you can.
The Five
The Five 05-13-2025
Now, in terms of this guy, Clyburn, who's old and has been hanging around, I get it. We've been trying to get Brit Hume out of here for years. The man won't take a hint. We've cleaned out his office. We took away his business cards. He just shows up on camera. Half the time, he's not even booked on special report. I've wanted his job. Many other people have wanted his job.
The Five
The Five 05-13-2025
Yes. Yeah, it was just me, wasn't it? So I want to just talk to the people that don't watch us. How would I do that if they're watching us? But let me put it differently. Do you like to time travel? Do you like to see the future? Well, I have something in store for you. You can just watch Fox and you don't have to buy books from CNN. OK, you'll know the future by watching us. That's how this goes.
The Five
The Five 05-13-2025
He only works a couple of days a week. Stop it, Jesse. OK, he's still here with us. OK, I'm sorry. I'm sorry, Brett. We love you. And happy birthday.
The Five
The Five 05-13-2025
Now, Jake. This is what the media is doing. I wasn't a part of the cover-up. Ron Klain's like, no, it was Dr. Jill. Tapper's like, oh, no, we were trying real hard. It's everybody's pointing their finger. He's getting paid to write a book about what we said four years ago. And we had Rand Paul on last night. And Rand Paul was against tariffs. He was against the Muslim plane and the drug prices.
The Five
The Five 05-13-2025
Well, he's following up for Mayor Pete. I don't know. Greg, I fly out of Newark. It's my home airport. And I'm going to the West Coast next week. And the Qataris have offered to give me a plane. Fox is not going to have anything. They're not going to give me a hard time about that. I don't think so. It's a gift. It's a gift. It'll go to the Waters Foundation after I'm finished with it.
The Five
The Five 05-13-2025
It's kind of like you when you left 10 o'clock on Saturday nights. Fox is still trying to dig ourselves out of that hole. You got to give them time. From what I understand, talking to my sources, you know who this is. When they moved the air traffic controllers from Newark to Philly, they had all these copper cables instead of fiber optic. And it was freaking everybody out because it was so slow.
The Five
The Five 05-13-2025
And all these planes almost crashed. And these guys in air traffic control get trauma leaves. So everybody got freaked out because the planes almost crashed. So then you get a 45-day trauma leave. That's crazy. Which they should have here on the show.
The Five
The Five 05-13-2025
That creek looks clean. It doesn't look like it's filled with sewage. And I have seen Pete Headseth swim miles and miles in a Speedo in the Hudson River, which, like, you can't even see through. This you can see right through. I think it's fine.
The Five
The Five 05-13-2025
And that's fine because at this company, you can say whatever you want if it's your opinion. We don't have to toe the line here. Now, if you go back four years and someone had gone on CNN and said Biden's brain dead, the lab leak, the laptop, they would have cut your mic and you would have been banished from CNN. Now, being banished from CNN is a badge of honor.
The Five
The Five 05-13-2025
I mean, Democrats think it's like a gotcha that they're saying, like, our creek is polluted. You guys polluted it.
The Five
The Five 05-13-2025
You can't smell underwater. It's scientifically proven. Hair news. Let's see it. Yeah. Philly star Bryce Harper shaved his head. Now, when you're in a slump, you shave your head and you get out of the slump immediately. Women do it all the time when they're having like a bad stretch. They just do like a radical haircut. And you know, you know, something's wrong.
The Five
The Five 05-13-2025
Jessica Tarloff has actually shaved her head and she hasn't been having a good couple shows. Obviously, with the Biden tell-alls, it's been rough. You'll see her next week and she's going to look like Bryce. Tonight, Jesse Waters' primetime, Kristi Noem, Kevin McCarthy, and Lara Trump. 8 o'clock.
The Five
The Five 05-13-2025
But still, you can hear the truth here. If Joe Biden had done decently at that debate, cover up still would have happened. There would have been no book. There would have been no book advance. We would not be hearing about this. They would just slap them in a wheelchair on November 6th. And they would have said, see, he's just like FDR. They're both in wheelchairs and they both defeated Nazis.
The Five
The Five 05-13-2025
What's more dangerous, Trump being president or a secretive cabal of unelected officials controlling the president using auto pen and overruling him and then lying to the public about it? What's more unconstitutional? What's more corrupt? In a way, Trump saved democracy.
The Five
The Five 05-13-2025
I love you, too. President Trump making it rain deals in the desert. 47 pumping the YMCA and God bless the USA as he dazzled Saudi Arabia, securing 600 billion dollars in investments from the Saudis and the largest arms deal ever at 142 billion bucks. The Saudis rolling out the royal purple carpet and extended a warm welcome by having white Arabian horses flank his motorcade.
The Five
The Five 05-13-2025
Salesman Trump pitching a shared golden age of prosperity for the U.S. and the Middle East.
The Five
The Five 05-13-2025
Dopey Dems, on the other hand, can't bring themselves to celebrate all the delicious deals Trump's cooking up for the country.
The Five
The Five 05-13-2025
So, Dana, what's wrong with securing investment deals from our partners in the Middle East?
The Five
The Five 05-13-2025
It's only Tuesday, and that tax bill will really juice things. Greg, a lot of people don't know this about you, but you require your rides to be flanked by white Arabian horses when you arrive here.
The Five
The Five 05-22-2025
Howard, your name was invoked. Do you believe that your party needs to shut down and reopen under a different name?
The Five
The Five 05-22-2025
Last night on Primetime, Kayla, you said that the Justice Department should appoint a special counsel and look into the Biden cover-up. Would you subpoena Dr. Biden?
The Five
The Five 05-22-2025
Did Biden have good days or were the days just less bad than the day before? That's the point. Scary question. Ahead, the media is pumping up the Trump buyer's remorse hoax.
The Five
The Five 05-22-2025
Well, he's a killer, and that chant is getting a little crazy. They make excuses for these chants, Sandra. You know, we're all for free speech, but when you start committing murder after chanting it, you're going to bring down a lot of hell on that movement. They're now going to revoke visas. They're going to freeze money. You saw Harvard. They can't even bring in foreign students.
The Five
The Five 05-22-2025
Not really. But I respect the hair, not much else. Here's how bad it is. You don't understand how devastating it is when in a two party system, your party is not a viable option. Permission to make an analogy.
The Five
The Five 05-22-2025
A guy walks into a bar. It's closing time. There's two women there. He sits down in the middle. Blonde on the right, brunette on the left. Where are you going with this? He's having a good night, okay? He turns to the blonde on the right. She looks good. Can I buy you a drink? She says, yeah, I'll have a martini. They cheers. She opens her mouth. She's super annoying. He can't stand her.
The Five
The Five 05-22-2025
He says to himself, God, did I make the wrong decision? So then he turns to the brunette on the left and he says, how are you doing, babe? Can I buy you a drink? And she goes, sure, I'll have a beer. It's a dude in a dress, not a viable option. So he's like to the blonde, let's go back to my place. This is who the Democrats are. They're the brunette cross-dressing at the bar, not a viable option.
The Five
The Five 05-22-2025
You're going to get spied on if you're at these rallies now. It's getting dangerous for these people. They want to stop the war in Gaza. And that's fine. You can criticize Israel. You can even go so far as to call it a genocide. But when you start committing heinous acts like this. Not only is this movement going to be decimated in the United States, it's going to backfire in the Middle East.
The Five
The Five 05-22-2025
Well, among other places in the house, Greg. But, you know, you're right. This isn't going to cost anything. You don't have to spend a lot of money to get healthy. And that's actually in the report. I look at this as common sense. Trump is a great parent. Look at his kids. No drinking, no smoking, no tattoos. They're all good looking and successful with their own nice families.
The Five
The Five 05-22-2025
We're on the precipice of possibly getting an Iranian nuclear deal, Abraham Accords. Taking out innocent people in Washington, D.C. is not going to lead us to peace in the region. It's only going to make things worse. The left has more assassins than ideas. You go down the list. You got Luigi. You got the Scalise shooter. Two Trump assassins. The Kavanaugh guy. The IVF bomber.
The Five
The Five 05-22-2025
You can't say that about the Bidens, and I don't want to get into any of the other Democrats' families because it's not right. But everybody knows who I'm talking about. My children don't drink soda. They don't have fruit juice. We try to do as much water as possible, and we all try to play sports and be outside as much as possible. That's the key. Try not to give them too many phones and screens.
The Five
The Five 05-22-2025
Try to go outside and play with them, and try to eat relatively healthy. Jesse Jr. does love his chicken fingers. Mm-hmm.
The Five
The Five 05-22-2025
You know, Ben Franklin was bored. And you know what he did? He invented like a thousand different things. I'm not Ben Franklin, so I don't invent anything when I'm bored. But I do stay busy because idle time is a devil's play thing. You got to keep active. My mom, she'd take me to places and she'd go, go make a friend. And I'd just be forced to go interact with people.
The Five
The Five 05-22-2025
Or she'd say, here's a stick, go outside. And then I'd hit squirrels with it. I mean, you always got to be doing something. Boarding's illegal as a child. It's banned in my house. Sandy, what are your thoughts about this?
The Five
The Five 05-22-2025
You did that with your analogy today before you go that blonde, dark character. You were talking beforehand. I know what Greg's bored. When Jessica's talking, he's just doodling.
The Five
The Five 05-22-2025
We have a special Memorial sale at the Fox shop. Proud American collection. 20 percent off now through Monday. Let's go. Mem day 20 is the code. You get hats, T-shirts, flip flops, towels, can coolers, can coolers, koozies like like this guy and much, much more. Good shop. Fox News for the full lineup tonight. Jesse, what is primetime? Johnny was down in D.C. and caught up with Bernie.
The Five
The Five 05-22-2025
Some arsonist tried to take out Shapiro's home. So this left-wing violence is compounding. And then there's this media environment that permission slips it. Oh, you know... It's just a phrase from the river to the sea. You understand the historical context. They're financing it. They're nurturing it at universities. And then they're downplaying it after the fact.
The Five
The Five 05-22-2025
You saw it in the Oval Office last night. You know what? It's only a few white farmers being murdered. I mean, we're not at the genocide level yet. I mean, this is what they're doing. And this has to stop now.
The Five
The Five 05-22-2025
Dr. Jill Biden catching heat for elder abuse, getting torched by a WAPO columnist and D.C. 's longtime social queen, Sally Quinn, for dragging her barely functioning husband into another campaign.
The Five
The Five 05-22-2025
Got it. Yep. First Lady McBiden is not the only person who pulled a weekend at Bernie's. According to the author of that new Biden book, Team Joe was reportedly amazed at the media coverage they were able to spend. Alex Thompson sharing a conversation where a Biden insider admitted journalists failed to be skeptical about the president's declining condition. All right, Greg. So what are we on?
The Five
The Five 05-15-2025
Kelly, what do you notice the difference between the resistance in the first term and the second term?
The Five
The Five 05-15-2025
It's pretty great. I love it. And Biden didn't see what was possible. One, because he didn't understand the power of oil. He was a green guy. And two, he didn't understand how to play these people off of each other. Trump, we're... Very close with Israel, but we've sidelined the Israelis throughout this whole trip. We're directly negotiating with Iran, the Houthis, and Hamas.
The Five
The Five 05-15-2025
Let him keep going. I'm not joking. The most damning Biden brain revelation yet.
The Five
The Five 05-15-2025
And we're basically waiting for Netanyahu to end the war in Gaza because that unlocks the Abraham Accords. And now that we got our last American hostage out of there, the pressure's on them. Now, the Iranians are selling drones to the Russians. How do we stop that? You get the Saudis to drive the price of oil down so Putin has to negotiate, end the war, and they cut off the drone sales.
The Five
The Five 05-15-2025
Absolutely. So once they pass this big, beautiful bill, Harold, the Democrats are going to vote for some. We'll get on to the hearings. And if they don't, I'm going to give them a piece of my mind. Dana is right. This book by Tapper should have been called Fox was right. What's really new besides the wheelchair? We knew we didn't have cabinet meetings when they did happen. They were staged.
The Five
The Five 05-15-2025
We knew no one saw them. So why are we talking about this book so much? It just confirms everything we knew because people in the inside told Jake. All right. This kills every shot Kamala would have had in 28. Because... The cabinet never met her and she's never him and she's never been asked about any of these revelations. So the second she gets out there, she's going to get crucified.
The Five
The Five 05-15-2025
You know what she smells like? She smells like cover up. She'll never get it off her. And for that matter, nobody in the administration who where's my orcas working right now, Harold, for the Sinaloa cartel. Where is Binder working? She was the one saying Biden was running circles around her. The whole administration is a disgrace.
The Five
The Five 05-15-2025
Also, we've isolated the Iranians because their best friend, Assad, is gone. He's lounging in Moscow. And so... We also caught the Chinese buying sanctioned oil from the Iranians. And Trump's threatening to slap whoppers of more sanctions on that oil. And if that happens, they have to negotiate. The Iranians are in the weakest position ever. That's why they're going to do this.
The Five
The Five 05-15-2025
So if you control the Middle East oil supply, if we ever go to war with China, oh, too bad. The Chinese import 100 percent of their oil. So with our Navy and our control over the Mideast, we can. Bring them to their knees without even squeezing a trigger. Sebastian Gorka said something very brilliant today. Why are you laughing, Greg? Your impression. That's actually how you pronounce his name.
The Five
The Five 05-15-2025
I do. I mean, this guy's made the whole country fat. RFK is trying to make a skinny.
The Five
The Five 05-15-2025
Protesting. So, Greg, this is how it works. Big balls, doges, some fat out of HHS. The media lies about it and says they're cutting all this important stuff. Some intern hands this crazy congresswoman a fake news article. She reads it to RFK. He fact checks the bejesus out of her. We play it on the five. And that's why everybody thinks Democrats are lunatics.
The Five
The Five 05-15-2025
Gorka. He said eight years ago, the strategy in the Mideast was security, destroy ISIS and Abraham Accords. And now it's prosperity. It's kind of like what we did after World War Two, Japan and Western Europe. We had this economic alliance that just created so much wealth over the last few decades. What has happened in the Middle East? They've been at war since the 80s.
The Five
The Five 05-15-2025
Well, thank God I'm not a lawyer. And if I was, I still wouldn't know the answer, Kellyanne. But life sends you signals and you have to know how to read them. For instance, after college, I was a bellhop and I had a really cool outfit. It was gray and it was black and I had a nice hat. That was in the winter. You a topper? Yep.
The Five
The Five 05-15-2025
And then spring season rolls around and my boss says, you guys all have to wear these safari outfits with the little hats and it's like all camel colored. And I took that as a sign that I'm not going to be a bellhop anymore. I got out of that job and took another job and then got fired from that job.
The Five
The Five 05-15-2025
We had a great day at Moreland Farms this morning. It was the Flurry 6th Invitational. It was action-packed. There we have Kevin, Hans, Schmitty, and Winters, and myself, and then Guy. He put the thing on. Awesome time. We were eighth place in the morning.
The Five
The Five 05-15-2025
So very, very competitive. 250 guys were there. A lot of money was donated to the local health care organization. So thank you guys very much.
The Five
The Five 05-15-2025
We're doing the same thing. They have liquid gold and they're sitting right in the middle of the crossroads between Asia and Europe. I love it.
The Five
The Five 05-15-2025
I'm not saying we're not allies. I'm just saying we're doing a lot of stuff on the side without them bringing them to the table.
The Five
The Five 05-15-2025
We're directly negotiating with Hamas. Never happened before. We're directly negotiating with the mullahs. Never happened before. Pull the tape. We always have the Israelis in our bag during these negotiations. We just did a one on one with the Houthis.
The Five
The Five 05-15-2025
You know what that means. It's TDS Thursday. First up, Chuck Schumer thinks the president's hatred of offshore windmills makes him a dictator.
The Five
The Five 05-15-2025
The boss is getting his TDS on. Bruce Springsteen delivered a fiery speech against President Trump while on tour in Europe.
The Five
The Five 05-26-2025
What Did I Miss? A Fox Nation game show. Streaming now. Only on Fox Nation.
The Five
The Five 05-26-2025
We were just talking about what we would have called Joe if he was in a wheelchair. Asleep at the wheel.
The Five
The Five 05-26-2025
So I want to just talk to the people that don't watch us. How would I do that if you're watching us? But let me put it differently. Do you like to time travel? Do you like to see the future? Well, I have something in store for you. You can just watch Fox and you don't have to buy books from CNN. OK, you'll know the future by watching us. That's how this goes.
The Five
The Five 05-26-2025
First, my heart goes out to the Bidens and the Biden family. Very unfortunate diagnosis, and we hope he beats it. But a lot of people are speculating whether this was medical malpractice or whether this was a medical cover-up. And we have every right to speculate because they have been caught in so many lies. Now, so the medical cover-up is not being said by Jesse Waters.
The Five
The Five 05-26-2025
It's being said all over the media by Democrats and by physicians. They're saying that this was caught possibly earlier and then nothing was released and then possibly exposed as a way to blunt the impact of the Her Report audio release and the book. Now, I don't think that's possible, but at this point, anything's possible. The other one is the medical malpractice.
The Five
The Five 05-26-2025
How are you not going to give a guy a PSA test? How are you not going to give someone a test and then not release the results? Did they not give this test to Joe Biden because they gave it to the last three presidents and then they released the PSA numbers? So who knows if he even got tested? He was supposed to have had a full test a year ago and they said there was no cancer detected.
The Five
The Five 05-26-2025
Well, we need to know exactly what test they did. And. Since 2000, Joe Biden has broken his foot. He's had skin cancer. He has had two horrible bouts with COVID-19. And then he was living as president with prostate cancer. And the entire media said he was healthy as an ox.
The Five
The Five 05-26-2025
Welcome back to our Memorial Day special. Hollywood is snapping out of their liberal comedy coma and attacking their own. Let's watch.
The Five
The Five 05-26-2025
Liberal comedians are finally snapping out of their four-year comedy coma. They've been dodging the obvious punchlines of Joe and Kamala's clown car of chaos, all to keep up the narrative that Joe's brain was perfectly fine and that Kamala Harris really did serve fries at that McDonald's.
The Five
The Five 05-26-2025
Big names like Jim Gaffigan and Whitney Cummings now admitting they were pressured to toe the liberal line and only mock Republicans. Watch.
The Five
The Five 05-26-2025
Up next, everybody's favorite part of The Five. And no, it's not me. I never had to knock on wood, but I know someone who has, which no one ever did.
The Five
The Five 05-26-2025
This is a monster, 108-foot tall wave, Northern California. Mavericks. This guy, exactly. Alessandro Sleiber smashing the previous world record by more than 20 feet. Look at that. Wow. Look at that, 40 miles per hour while climbing down that barrel.
The Five
The Five 05-26-2025
My twins got confirmed. After a decade of research, hundreds of scientists have mapped out a fruit fly's brain. That's what the brain of a fruit fly looks like. More than 490 feet of wiring, as long as four blue whales placed end to end. Just sit back and watch the brain rotate in a counterclockwise direction as we ponder the insignificance of the fruit fly.
The Five
The Five 05-26-2025
Jesse, I would probably just to mess with you. Yeah, shrimp. Because I know how much you hate shellfish.
The Five
The Five 05-26-2025
Jesse? The Hobbit is my answer for every literary question. Ever. First book that pops into my head, I'm going to go Hobbit.
The Five
The Five 05-26-2025
In public, it's an embarrassment for men to be seen slurping soup from a spoon. And that's why I don't do it. It is interesting.
The Five
The Five 05-26-2025
I made Johnny eat escargot one time. Disgusting. Yeah, he didn't even know what it was. Poor guy. Did it taste like chicken?
The Five
The Five 05-26-2025
There was a secret bookshelf in my grandfather's library that we discovered, and we went down. It's where he kept his rare whiskeys, and I accidentally shattered, like, a $10,000 bottle. Wow. You did?
The Five
The Five 05-26-2025
Jesse, do you have a... I was going to do the exact same bit, and he stole it. It was dark, and then I felt this slippery sensation. So this man with a mask, I can't top it.
The Five
The Five 05-26-2025
I can. It was the Me Too movement. It set off a chain of events here that opened a lot of things up for me and other people. And now I find myself where I am today. That is like the most hilarious.
The Five
The Five 05-26-2025
I had to mow my dad's croquet cork. Got in a lot of trouble. And the mower actually got caught up in the wicket. And then the wicket came and hit the poodle in the tail. Oh, no. We had to take it to the vet.
The Five
The Five 05-26-2025
Oh, the prep is the least favorite part. So what I try to do is I try not to look at the rundown for a few hours after it comes out. And then so then you have less time to prepare and then you get in the car and then you have to cram prep. And so that's how I do it. I cram prep. It's basically having a deadline and being forced to produce interesting things to say. See, I did not prepare for that.
The Five
The Five 05-19-2025
Yeah, I mean, I'd fall asleep if Tampon talked to me. And he won't. I've invited him on, like, twice, and he still is dodging. Bummer. So Tampon's career is over, Katie. You can't call ICE agents Nazis. That is a career ender. Federal law enforcement officials are Nazis. And this is coming from the guy that had a COVID snitch line. This is coming from the guy that...
The Five
The Five 05-19-2025
He fantasizes over communist China, which is a little more in line with those other people that he mentioned. If you have a face tattoo and you have criminal convictions in this country and you're a foreign national and you get picked up, I don't want a lawyer. I don't want an appeal. I want you. Adios. Goodbye. And if he thinks they should stay in here while they fight through the legal system.
The Five
The Five 05-19-2025
No, absolutely not. Now, Hillary. She thinks it's virtuous to have the entire third world in Latin America break through the border right before their water breaks and then have a baby at an American hospital without health insurance and then just raise the kid in a hotel room in Midtown while we pay for it. Absolutely not. We want more babies.
The Five
The Five 05-19-2025
Everybody wants Marbetis because if you don't have them, it's basic arithmetic, Katie. You go bankrupt first and then the civilization collapses. And all the policies the lefts are pushing is contributing to the decline of civilization, whether it's porn. Cannabis, rapid urbanization, rapid industrialization, high mortgage rates.
The Five
The Five 05-19-2025
All of these things are making it impossible to have children and raise children. I just feel bad for Chelsea Clinton. That's who I really mostly at these times. I'm sure you and Bill.
The Five
The Five 05-19-2025
Well, first, my heart goes out to the Bidens and the Biden family. Very unfortunate diagnosis. And we hope he beats it. But a lot of people are speculating whether this was medical malpractice or whether this was a medical cover up. And we have every right to. speculate because they have been caught in so many lies. Now, so the medical cover-up is not being said by Jesse Waters.
The Five
The Five 05-19-2025
Well, it's because they reversed the tariffs. That's why the market's behaving like it is. Not all of them. You know, there's a little box on your tax return, Harold, that you can check and you can voluntarily pay more. Have you ever done that? I follow the Trump model. I only pay what I have to pay.
The Five
The Five 05-19-2025
It's being said all over the media by Democrats and by physicians. They're saying that this was caught possibly earlier and then nothing was released and then possibly... exposed as a way to blunt the impact of the Her Report audio release and the book. Now, I don't think that's possible, but at this point, anything's possible. The other one is the medical malpractice.
The Five
The Five 05-19-2025
OK, so you just want to make sure everybody has to pay more taxes under the threat of the IRS coming to your house with guns. But if you wanted to be so generous and kind because you think you want to save the country, you can do it. You don't. Can I make one point? Please, Jesse. I want to make a point about Medicare. Stop falling asleep.
The Five
The Five 05-19-2025
They keep on saying you're going to cut Medicare for these people. You know what they're doing? If you're a young, able bodied, healthy American man, 26 years old, you don't even want to go to work. You can get on Medicaid. It's blowing a hole in the budget. Thanks to Barack Obama. You can live at your parents' house. play softball on the weekend, sell ecstasy on the side, not even look for a job.
The Five
The Five 05-19-2025
I like that. And you can get free health care. That's what they're doing. They're just closing that lazy loophole.
The Five
The Five 05-19-2025
I had to make Medicaid interesting. Why did you choose softball? Or baseball, Katie.
The Five
The Five 05-19-2025
The boss loves to talk smack about 47 while on foreign soil. Bruce Springsteen accusing President Trump of running a rogue government and siding with dictators. But offstage, the so-called dried-out prune is singing a whole different tune. Bruce, what's your message for Trump?
The Five
The Five 05-19-2025
But President Trump is showing Springsteen, who's boss, calling for a major investigation into Bruce and his liberal celeb friends, who he says got paid millions to fawn over Kamala during the 2024 campaign. Greg, do you support a federal investigation into all celebrities?
The Five
The Five 05-19-2025
Meet him. We should have just Trump go to Hollywood for a rope line. Have every celebrity do a little meet and greet. Yes, let him say whatever they want. Now, it looked like he was just playing his acoustic guitar, Sandra. Does that deserve, what, 500 grand to the E Street band?
The Five
The Five 05-19-2025
OK, it would be like me playing the flute during the five the whole time. People don't come to me play the flute. Would you do that? No. A flute or a recorder?
The Five
The Five 05-19-2025
How are you not going to give a guy a PSA test? How are you not going to give someone a test and then not release the results? Did they not give this test to Joe Biden because they gave it to the last three presidents and then they released the PSA numbers? So who knows if he even got tested? He was supposed to have had a full test a year ago and they said there was no cancer detected.
The Five
The Five 05-19-2025
Yeah. All right. Yeah. Up next, a finger death grip among world powers.
The Five
The Five 05-19-2025
No. The situation is this, Harold. Men like to touch other guys. Is that true? We like to touch them like this.
The Five
The Five 05-19-2025
At the Planet Fitness sauna, where I saw you. And then politicians, the guys, love to touch guys. They're like, oh, you know, that's all they think. But then when you're old, when you're old, you can get away with more stuff. And then when you're Turkish, sky's the limit. Because people are like, maybe it's a cultural thing. They're like, you know, they do things differently down there.
The Five
The Five 05-19-2025
Well, we need to know exactly what test they did. And. Since 2000, Joe Biden has broken his foot. He's had skin cancer. He has had two horrible bouts with COVID-19. And then he was living as president with prostate cancer. And the entire media said he was healthy as an ox and that they said he was running circles around Binder. And so this doctor, O'Connor, was his personal physician.
The Five
The Five 05-19-2025
All right, Jesse. Pleaves no more. Midshipman at the U.S. Naval Academy. You're going to love this. Conquered the Herndon Climb in Annapolis. Longstanding tradition. They worked together to ascend a greased up 21-foot monument, Greg. Wow. And swap a white hat already on top with an upperclassman's hat. It's slathered with 200 pounds of vegetable shortening.
The Five
The Five 05-19-2025
And they are sprayed with water the whole time. Took two hours, 27 minutes, 31 seconds to climb it. Amazing feat of strength. Tonight, Jesse Waters primetime. Comey doubles down. Harold.
The Five
The Five 05-19-2025
There's a funny axiom that says, you know, having a personal physician 24-7 around the clock is a leading indicator of death. A lot of celebrities, a lot of wealthy individuals have these doctors on call and they kind of give you anything and they're just there to protect the brand, there to protect the status and the job. That happens with some people.
The Five
The Five 05-19-2025
But this guy, O'Connor, takes it to a next level. This guy was brought in from Delaware and he was in business with the Biden family. And it was this is oldest president ever. In American history, probably the sickest sitting president of this century, and he never gave a press conference. In four years, O'Connor never came to the press and said, this is what the president is dealing with.
The Five
The Five 05-19-2025
That is... He needs to be brought in. He needs to be subpoenaed. And he needs to answer some of these questions. I can't believe if he had won, Joe Biden would have died in office and Kamala would have been president. And the doctors in the media would have been like, oops, sorry, we missed it. Wow. Wow.
The Five
The Five 05-19-2025
And that is a crime against this republic. And I think the Democrats are going to pay for a long time for being a part of what is now being revealed to be a massive cover-up. We need to apologize to the American people that we were a part of something that wasn't on the up-and-up.
The Five
The Five 05-16-2025
Well, he claimed he was a Jewish Puerto Rican truck driver. Greg, we all you seem to want to challenge some of her assertions.
The Five
The Five 05-16-2025
OK, you've said enough about aging rockers. Martha, how what do you think Jessica was trying to say there?
The Five
The Five 05-16-2025
Now, I think I'm trying to figure this out. So you're saying that Trump spent all week signing all of these billion dollar deals and no other person from the Biden administration put their hand up and said, we did that. That was us. The first I'm hearing from it is from you, Jessica.
The Five
The Five 05-16-2025
Okay. You'd think someone would be like, oh, that was our deal. But no, it's just strange where she pulls these things out.
The Five
The Five 05-16-2025
Again, that doesn't help your cause. What are you talking about? It's the Washington Post.
The Five
The Five 05-16-2025
So Greg said there's two answers they can give. And it's tough. But this is how you do it. I shouldn't say it, but this is how you say listen. I saw Biden slow down. I didn't say anything because my party wasn't saying anything and I was trying to be a loyal guy. I should have had a little more courage. I learned my lesson. It won't happen again. That's all you have to say.
The Five
The Five 05-16-2025
Dust the shells for Prince Martha. I don't know if he made it or not. He obviously was trying to put a hit out on Trump, got caught, deleted it, and he's got a book out. Oh, what a coincidence. Any cop, any prosecutor knows the code for homicide. 8-6 isn't just a mafia slang. It's a military slang. 8-6, T-O, and a rotary phone. He was a Marine. He obviously knew what he was doing here.
The Five
The Five 05-16-2025
But for some reason, politicians can't admit they're wrong. We have politicians still saying, yeah, the Iraq war, I'd do it again. Kamala Harris said, yeah, let's do taxpayer sex change surgeries for migrants in prison. She never said, actually, you know what? That was dumb. They just have to admit they're wrong. For instance, sometimes I say, you know what? I interrupted Jessica too much.
The Five
The Five 05-16-2025
Sometimes Jessica could say, you know what? I lied about what Trump claimed about all these contracts I got in the Mideast. We could all have a little humility.
The Five
The Five 05-16-2025
And he's not just any old FBI director, Martha. He tried to frame this guy for treason. Remember, he spied on his campaign. He got caught, got fired, leaked, and then ran away from Durham so he wouldn't have to ask, answer any questions. He has called Trump a dangerous threat to the country who should be punished for the things he says. Now, I don't know if this guy wants attention for the book.
The Five
The Five 05-16-2025
Well, I started thinking about guys dating my daughter and I lost my train of thought.
The Five
The Five 05-16-2025
I'll just say quickly, you guys confuse consequences with cruelty. It's not cruel to say, hey, you crossed the border, you broke the law, go home. It's actually compassionate to the people that you love and the country that you're in to kick those people out, Jessica.
The Five
The Five 05-16-2025
Jesse, do you have any, like, anxiety dreams? I have two. One, I'm about to graduate, but I don't have enough credits.
The Five
The Five 05-16-2025
And by the way, the book is about right-wing extremists who launch a terror attack in Manhattan. Or if he wants to be arrested because his life sucks. He's lost all his respect. No one likes him. And he's probably dying and goading the administration to put him in handcuffs because that's all he really has anymore going for him. This man has set the Democrats back again.
The Five
The Five 05-16-2025
Yeah, that'll be really good. If you've never been. Have you ever wished you smelled like a glazed donut? You're in luck. The native has partnered with Dunkin' Donuts to create donut-inspired body wash, deodorant, and lotion. We have strawberry frosted body wash, vanilla sprinkle lotion, and Boston cream and blueberry cobbler deodorant. Happy birthday to Frenchie Firecracker.
The Five
The Five 05-16-2025
One of our biggest fans. Happy birthday. We love you. Tonight, Jesse Waters primetime. The Pfizer cover-up, 8 p.m.
The Five
The Five 05-16-2025
Everybody with common sense knows what this guy meant. Just like we knew it was MS-13 on the knuckles, Jessica. Everybody knows 86-47. So the whole country sees this and then they lie about it. And then this is the guy that weaponized the entire Justice Department against President Trump. And it just reminds everybody the lengths the Democrats will go to lie.
The Five
The Five 05-16-2025
Meanwhile, Trump, he's trying to make peace. And this guy's calling for his head. I hope the Secret Service knocks on his door at his little beach house and pays him a visit because this can't stand after two attempts on Trump's life. You can't take this lightly.
The Five
The Five 05-16-2025
47 is riding high in the polls after delivering a Middle East masterclass, Jessica, bringing home trillions in new U.S. investments from the Gulf states. And yeah, he still found time to clap back at Bruce Springsteen's overseas meltdown, where the boss called him corrupt and treasonous. Trump saying Bruce is, quote, just a pushy, obnoxious jerk who fervently supported crooked Joe Biden.
The Five
The Five 05-16-2025
This dried out prune of a rocker, his skin is all atrophied, ought to keep his mouth shut until he gets back into the country. And as he battles aging rockers, Trump's giving a lesson in humility on his Mideast tour.
The Five
The Five 05-16-2025
All right, Jessica, Masterclass, it's not really in dispute. So my question to you is, how big of a Masterclass was this?
The MeidasTouch Podcast
Dem Gov Town Hall on Trump 100 Days with JB Pritzker, Tim Walz, Maura Healey, and Kathy Hochul
Hello, Democratic governors and my network. My name is Jesse. And here's my question. Trump's implementation and strategy of his tariffs has been unstable and aberrant, to say the least. How do you assess the short term and long term
The MeidasTouch Podcast
Dem Gov Town Hall on Trump 100 Days with JB Pritzker, Tim Walz, Maura Healey, and Kathy Hochul
economic impacts of said tariffs and what should we do as people here in the u.s what should we do to prepare and how should we prepare for this because it's going to hurt thank you for answering my question governor
The MeidasTouch Podcast
Trump Screws Himself as He Tanks Everything
If you had one thing to say to Jasmine Crockett, what would it be?
The MeidasTouch Podcast
Trump Screws Himself as He Tanks Everything
Fox News alert, according to the Washington Times, Kash Patel's FBI opening an investigation into James Comey. The Times reports that Comey launched an off-the-books honeypot operation against candidate Donald Trump. According to a whistleblower, he sent two female undercovers to infiltrate Trump's 2016 campaign and told them to act as honeypots, spies who use sex to get what they want.
The MeidasTouch Podcast
Trump Screws Himself as He Tanks Everything
and the honeypots ingratiated themselves into the top ranks of the campaign. If true, that means the Obama administration was conducting multiple phony investigations into Trump without any evidence. The whistleblower says FBI employees were told to shut their mouth about the operation, and one of the agents was transferred to the CIA so she couldn't testify.
The MeidasTouch Podcast
Trump Screws Himself as He Tanks Everything
This investigation into Comey isn't about revenge. It's about justice. Cash and Bongino are gonna get answers.
The MeidasTouch Podcast
Fox News Starts Collapsing as Trump Can't Be Saved
And yeah, whatever Jesse says, I mean, maybe we'll find out next week that it's, you know, as true as the condoms to Gaza, but there's real stuff and stories. No, I made that up. Oh, cool.
The MeidasTouch Podcast
Fox News Starts Collapsing as Trump Can't Be Saved
Okay. So he made that up. Don't bother fact-checking it. It was made up.
The MeidasTouch Podcast
Fox News Starts Collapsing as Trump Can't Be Saved
I have heard, and you say if Joe Biden had done this, if Joe Biden had shown up at the Daytona 500 while there were people living under emergency declarations and passing away in Georgia, a tree fell into a guy's house and ended up killing him.
The MeidasTouch Podcast
Fox News Starts Collapsing as Trump Can't Be Saved
Well, he needs to, I think, say something when the whole point was criticizing Joe Biden for absolutely everything that he ever did.
The MeidasTouch Podcast
Fox News Starts Collapsing as Trump Can't Be Saved
We've gone through it multiple times about how quickly he signed emergency declarations.
The MeidasTouch Podcast
Fox News Starts Collapsing as Trump Can't Be Saved
How about you just say that maybe you shouldn't be driving around a race car track when this is going on.
The MeidasTouch Podcast
Fox News Loses It on Air Over Trump Shock Admissions
You shouldn't be surprised. And again, you're shocked. And I'm going to be very honest.
The MeidasTouch Podcast
Fox News Loses It on Air Over Trump Shock Admissions
It means that you have to consume non-mainstream media. Because this is very well known, right, Sage? For those of us, if you guys do not know this is happening, I encourage you to reevaluate where you get your news from.
The MeidasTouch Podcast
Fox News Loses It on Air Over Trump Shock Admissions
Katie, I think he also took his grandkids in with him. Hey, it's good for your immune system. I myself have swam in the Potomac. I didn't get Potomac. It's probably just as bad as this creek. And I have a friend named Corey and he ate a raw clam once from the bowels of the Potomac. He survived. So I think it's okay. It's all right. You gotta live a little. Enjoy. Get outside.
The MeidasTouch Podcast
Fox News Loses It on Air Over Trump Shock Admissions
It can't be worse than the tap water. Come on.
The MeidasTouch Podcast
Fox News Loses It on Air Over Trump Shock Admissions
Yes. And teachers support it.
The MeidasTouch Podcast
Fox News Loses It on Air Over Trump Shock Admissions
They have like the tools like if it was a cat.
The MeidasTouch Podcast
Trump Quickly Folds to Canada as Reality Sets In
Before we get to Elon, can you believe Canada tried to shut off our electricity? I mean, it's almost like they want us to invade.
The MeidasTouch Podcast
Fox News in Complete Panic as Trump Screws Them
So demographically, they're a threat, not to mention the national security threat. There is no way you can have these two peoples living side by side.
The MeidasTouch Podcast
Fox News in Complete Panic as Trump Screws Them
But this population in Palestine is hostile. It's uneducated. It's even more radicalized than they were at the beginning of this. I mean, now they have no homes at all. They're even more hateful of the Israelis. And their birth rate is explosive. The average Palestinian woman has five and a half babies. The average Israeli woman has only two and a half babies.
The MeidasTouch Podcast
Fox News in Panic Mode as Trump Plunges Markets
And now you're seeing what Trump's trying to do. He's trying to destroy China. Because if you break the Chinese economy, you put America back on top. The other Chinese thought they were going to overtake us. It's not going to happen if this thing goes through. If you can cut off their exports, they're toast. You can't export all these cheap products here.
The MeidasTouch Podcast
Fox News in Panic Mode as Trump Plunges Markets
You're definitely not going to sell them into Europe because they don't have the consumer power. And so the Chinese economy, they can't consume their own stuff because they don't have enough wealth and they don't have enough families, to be honest with you. And so you're going to have to lay people off And then the whole country is going to disintegrate. So that's a good thing.
The MeidasTouch Podcast
Fox News in Panic Mode as Trump Plunges Markets
And then you're breaking China off from Russia because this Chinese economy is feeding the Russians. And right now you drop oil to $60 a barrel. So it starves the Putin's war machine. And then you separate those two countries. So look what we're doing also at the same time in the Middle East. You have the Syrians, now they're on our side, their proxies now ours.
The MeidasTouch Podcast
Fox News in Panic Mode as Trump Plunges Markets
And then you have carriers surrounding the Iranians. And we're saying you better negotiate, not nuke up, or we'll bomb, bomb, bomb. And if they can do a deal there, that's the second Russian proxy that falls. And we'll get that Iranian oil back on the world market, and it keeps the price of oil going lower. We need cheap energy. And then the Europeans, they don't have another game.
The MeidasTouch Podcast
Fox News in Panic Mode as Trump Plunges Markets
They have to sell here. They can't sell it anywhere else. And what you're seeing is the EU trade bloc starting to break. Hungary is trying to do a bilateral deal. Your English are going to start trying to just negotiate directly with us. And it splits Europe. Germany, from France, and then you throw in the Greenland thing. Of course.
The MeidasTouch Podcast
Fox News in Panic Mode as Trump Plunges Markets
And then you throw in the NATO thing, because right now Pete Higgs has gone, oh, we might bring some troops home. So they're really off kilter. You've now surrounded the Chinese. They thought the Chinese were going to cut deals with the Japanese and the South Koreans. Didn't happen. Thought it was going to cut deals. Their appearance didn't happen. And Trump sent Hegseth down to the Panama Canal.
The MeidasTouch Podcast
Fox News in Panic Mode as Trump Plunges Markets
He's saying it's ours. And we're wrestling TikTok away from that country too. Everything is moving perfectly at the same time. Huh?
The MeidasTouch Podcast
Fox News in Panic Mode as Trump Plunges Markets
Play this clip. Kayleigh on last night and she said, remember how the Democrats made so much hay on January 6th? They had special commissions for two years and tried to keep the Republican Party on defense and just took up all this airtime. This is nothing compared to January 6th. This is basically a fraud perpetrated on the entire country, on the world.
The MeidasTouch Podcast
Fox News in Panic Mode as Trump Plunges Markets
He might not have even really been the president in the sense of he didn't really know what was going on and people could have been using and executing the powers of the presidency that were never even voted for office.
The MeidasTouch Podcast
Fox News Loses Control on Live TV as Trump Gets Worse
Doug's breaking the rules. He's leaning in like Barack leans into Michelle. Men should never lean. Green lines don't lie. And if you don't know, look it up.
The MeidasTouch Podcast
Fox News Loses Control on Live TV as Trump Gets Worse
Men should never cross their legs. What's worse, crossing your legs or leaning in? Text me.
The MeidasTouch Podcast
MeidasTouch Full Podcast - 4/8/25
Trump's trade war is high risk, high reward. But he's not biting his fingernails staring at the Dow. Today, he actually played golf. which if Biden had done, I definitely wouldn't have criticized him for it.
The MeidasTouch Podcast
Trump in Cover-Up Mode Over His Dark Past
A lot of people are wondering, because you said last week that you have the Epstein files on your desk. When can we see them and what's taking so long to release them?
The MeidasTouch Podcast
Trump in Cover-Up Mode Over His Dark Past
What kind? Are we going to see who was on the flights? Are we going to see any evidence from what he recorded? Because he had all of his homes wired with recording devices.
The MeidasTouch Podcast
Trump in Cover-Up Mode Over His Dark Past
Absolutely. And he had help. That's for sure. He sure did.
The MeidasTouch Podcast
Wow! Fox News Gives Up on Trump in Shocking Twist
The contribution that he made is not how much he saved the taxpayers. It's exposing how much Democrats stole from the taxpayers. It's so easy. It's only three steps, Greg. You are a Democrat, you know a Democrat in D.C., and you get them to send you money. That's how it works. And someone got a million dollars to clean up a beach. Now, if you get a DEI or DUI or DWI,
The MeidasTouch Podcast
Wow! Fox News Gives Up on Trump in Shocking Twist
It's comfortable to be a critic when you have no skin in the game. What many of these snobs don't get is that we're watching them take an IQ test every day. And every day we see the score.
The MeidasTouch Podcast
Desperate Fox News Flips Out on Air as Trump Cracks
David's the founder of Valuetainment. Do you ever drink a milkshake and drink it with a straw?
The MeidasTouch Podcast
Yikes! Fox News Loses It as Trump Tanks Bad
Yeah, they definitely were acting guilty. Like they got caught with their hand in the cookie jar real quick.
The MeidasTouch Podcast
Yikes! Fox News Loses It as Trump Tanks Bad
Here, play this clip. This isn't revenge. It just so happens that the people who have weaponized the government against Trump are also the ones breaking the law.
The MeidasTouch Podcast
Yikes! Fox News Loses It as Trump Tanks Bad
At all. And so Trump is... despite what people say about him, a true humanitarian. He places such a priority on human life. You got the Gaza hostages, you got the Russian hostages, you got the Venezuelan hostages, almost immediately. And remember what we did with Otto Warmburg. It's also the Maha movement. It's also fighting fentanyl.
The MeidasTouch Podcast
Yikes! Fox News Loses It as Trump Tanks Bad
All of these things are about cherishing and saving human lives. And he doesn't get a lot of credit for that.
The MeidasTouch Podcast
Fox News Loses Control on Live TV as Trump Gets Worse
And he's also talking about, he doesn't like Trump talking about expanding. The United States has always expanded, either by force or we buy things. bought Alaska from the Russians. We bought half the country from the French. We beat the Mexicans, the Native Americans, the Spanish, the British. That's how we do things here. It's manifest destiny.
The MeidasTouch Podcast
Fox News Loses Control on Live TV as Trump Gets Worse
And if we find out that we need Greenland as a matter of national survival, of course any president, Republican or Democrat, should get it by any means necessary. And it looks like right now we have our intelligence agencies in Greenland on the ground right now ensuring that they vote for independence. Right.
The MeidasTouch Podcast
Fox News Crashes On Air as Trump Screws Them
I spread that rumor about you going to Newsmax. Not completely untrue. Always have to have a backup plan, Greg. Trump, if this is pulled off, could go down in the history as the guy who broke China. Now, the question is, what kind of collateral damage is that going to cause?
The MeidasTouch Podcast
Fox News Crashes On Air as Trump Screws Them
we going to be able to re-industrialize at the same time as we collapse the chinese system i don't know he's got to stick the landing perfectly we have to get deals with mexico and canada that is the most important and i'm sure we'll get a deal with the europeans and then jesse waters disgustingly compares abrigo garcia to george floyd i mean just horrific stuff that they're saying here play this clip
The MeidasTouch Podcast
Fox News Crashes On Air as Trump Screws Them
If you are gonna talk about the rule of law and due process, you have to have a victim that is pure. You can't have a Floyd, you can't have a Smollett, you can't have a Garcia. Your example of victimhood has to be a sympathetic victim, not someone who beats his wife and traffics humans.
The MeidasTouch Podcast
Fox News Crashes On Air as Trump Screws Them
The Europeans need our energy. We need to sell them cars. We're going to have them drop their tariffs. But mostly we need them for basing. They're basically one big, beautiful military base. And we get it cheap, especially Italy. You project power throughout the Mediterranean, the Mideast, North Africa. You need it in Poland. You need it in Great Britain. And we love those Nordics.
The MeidasTouch Podcast
Fox News Crashes On Air as Trump Screws Them
We love those Nordics, especially as global warming picks up. And we're going to play some games in the Arctic. I see this going well. And again, I have not looked at my investment account.
The MeidasTouch Podcast
Fox News Crashes on Live TV as Trump Loses All Control
Here, play this clip. And being friendly to the world is what got us in this mess. We're not in high school. We don't need friends. Every country puts their interests first. And when our interests align, we can do business. And when they don't, that's life. If we have to burn down a few bridges with Denmark to take Greenland, we're big boys.
The MeidasTouch Podcast
Fox News Crashes on Live TV as Trump Loses All Control
We dropped A bombs on Japan and now they're our top ally in the Pacific. We may have to burn a bridge to build a big, beautiful new one to the next generation. America's not handcuffed by history. Trump knows what we need.
The MeidasTouch Podcast
Fox News Crashes on Live TV as Trump Loses All Control
Play this clip. We're going to go extinct like the dinosaurs if we don't start making babies. Not me and you. Not me and you. I'm saying we. The royal we. I'm married. I'm sorry. Me too.
The MeidasTouch Podcast
Fox News Crashes on Live TV as Trump Loses All Control
She goes, I think it's overwhelming. Here, play this clip. If you're not growing, you're dying. And that's why Greenland is necessary. Do you have colleagues in the House that are against taking Greenland?
The MeidasTouch Podcast
Fox News Crashes on Live TV as Trump Loses All Control
So much woo, folks. This is a tough way to end the week if you're long the market. If you're long gold, you're happy. But Dow is losing about 724. The S&P down 113. The Nasdaq down 484. That will do it for us.
The MeidasTouch Podcast
Fox News Loses It After Trump Oval Office Meltdown
Everyone seemed friendly, about to eat lunch, just doing what they do. Then for some reason, Zelensky got an attitude.
The MeidasTouch Podcast
Fox News Loses It After Trump Oval Office Meltdown
Don't tell the vice president he's speaking too loudly. He can speak however he wants to in the White House. Have you ever seen a foreign leader come into America and talk this way?
The MeidasTouch Podcast
Fox News Loses It After Trump Oval Office Meltdown
We run the world. this is america's world he's our proxy this world this ends when we say it ends it doesn't end when zelinski if he wants to go it alone go it alone i'm glad we helped him russia invaded we got his back at first it was the right thing to do but now it's not now the war's over and he doesn't recognize it's over and reality is going to eat this guy alive if he doesn't recognize this
The MeidasTouch Podcast
MeidasTouch Full Podcast - 3/28/25
Well, this is like Trump throws 20 touchdowns in a row and he finally throws a pick six. And that's what everybody wants to talk about. And the only way you get people to stop talking about it is you throw another touchdown. Now, I don't know what that's going to look like, but he's got to throw another touchdown and he's got to throw it fast. No one outside of D.C.
The MeidasTouch Podcast
MeidasTouch Full Podcast - 3/28/25
and in the news business really cares about this story. There's no video. There's no sex. There's no fraud. No one even knows what a Houthi is. People know who bin Laden is. People know what ISIS is. No one knows what a Houthi is.