Theo Von
Appearances
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
You'll not say. When the government asked me about that kind of shit. Yo no se. Venezuela.
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
It was like kind of nap time and everybody else would kind of lay and I would fucking keep an eye open and she'd give me that. But it was just like, yeah, it's crazy the kind of shit a woman can get you to do. You know, I'm standing out there with my fucking young lungs just fucking catching secondhand smoke just to be around a woman.
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
But yeah, well, yeah, the inauguration, it's just crazy. The whole thing is, I mean, just top to bottom, the whole, all of it was crazy. The fact that we got to go to it, right? Like, why were we there?
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
Oh, I was still awake because I'm watching, you know, it was like, and I started getting texts from people. I was like, oh my God, what just happened? It's kind of scary. Then I was like, it's like 1.30 in the morning. Nobody's up watching this probably.
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
Yeah. Yeah. And I get, start getting texts from people, old teachers, ex-girlfriends, moms, you know, how are you? You know, Ramona's divorced now or whatever, just shit like that, like trying to get me to pull up. yeah it was just I'm trying to think of what I feel about it
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
oh that's gotta be crazy weird huh yeah it's pretty cool though the husband's like don't fucking be over there talking to him let me go talk to him yeah exactly yeah he's like i'm gonna tell this guy what i think of him then he comes over and he's just fucking bullshitting yeah about what else was cool about that we were having uh well just the whole thing still dude the whole thing to me was great i mean like half hot chocolates half coffees conor mcgregor invented that that was a good little potion you want to go to the special area for your boys
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
And it's very, and when you hear an Irish guy talk, even though he's the most powerful leprechaun that's ever existed.
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
It was hard to get this thing completed or something, you know, because you realize like, man, so many little things have to fall into place. A lot of hurdles. Yeah, just things come up. Somebody has pink eye or whatever. Somebody's been eating ass at night or whatever, you know, when they show up and they can't even see, you know.
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
When you hear an Irish guy say there's something secret somewhere, there's something really magical about it. You know? Yeah. If it's a Chinese guy or something.
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
And it's crazy. And when you walk with Conor McGregor, they just kind of let it, it's like, he's like, has clearance or whatever. Like there's like military people, a drug dog was even like to him. Like everybody just get, a fucking drug dog gave him clearance. I was like, who even knows this dog, you know?
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
but yeah so then we're back in some special area and there's like people there's military personnel like they're eating rations they're cooking little things on like little bunts and burners on the fucking carpet and stuff I'm like and I think that's because the previous administration wasn't taking care of them yeah everybody like yeah they had this like some hot chocolate it definitely changed the energy up
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
But dude, there were people in there that were governors, mayors, rich people. Rich people. Yeah. Oh, that was the thing I didn't like. Too many rich people? Yeah, some rich kid. My dad is fucking, you know, the ambassador of milkshakes or whatever.
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
Yeah, a lot of fucking victims of fucking... money slurp lords in there.
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
Well, still the whole thing seemed like a dream because also you always hear – for me, like you hear about politics and like you hear about – but you don't really know if like what really happened to those things. You see it on C-SPAN. It's just like a bunch of like white people just like walking around and stuff and wearing suits and everything.
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
But then you're there and you're like, this is crazy. Dude, you didn't see at the end of our row was Mayor Eric Adams, dude.
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
She had met her boyfriend actually one year earlier, she said. I think maybe on New Year's she met him. Actually, she was super cool. That was cool. But yeah, the whole thing was just bizarre. I hadn't seen the Paul brothers in a long time, so when do you see them? And then when do you see... You and I will cross paths probably way more than them.
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
That was crazy. And then you have... And then Logan Fight does mythological fighting, whatever it's called, professional wrestling.
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
But they're supposed to be looking over a ridge and like, you know, that's part of their, you know, they're like a lookout on a boat or something for that day.
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
Really? No. Did you watch it growing up? Oh, dude. Oh, you did? Yeah. In our neighborhood, everybody watched it. Everybody looked like a wrestler. The men, the women, the children were kind of fat and wore like small tights.
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
And this was a time when people were just fat and you could wrestle. Right. That kind of era is a little... It's not what it used to be.
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
It used to be if you had buck teeth or whatever, you could wrestle. It was like you just had to have one thing. Blind Johnson or whatever. And they had a blind brother in there just fucking... And he still whoops my ass.
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
Oh, ass Watkins or whatever that guy's name was. Conjunctivitis fucking Johnson. He's in that bitch. Yeah. Yeah. It used to be if you couldn't read or whatever, they'd be like, uh, no words. Wilson is fighting this weekend or something, you know, now everyone's a fucking scholar. Yeah. Now everybody, it's like, it's just, I, I, you know what I just realized? I think there is room for more of a,
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
real type of wrestling to come back a little bit. Cause everything kind of gets, things kind of go and get too fancy. And then that's when something else is able to come along. And I think it's a little bit more connected to, um, to the roots.
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
Yeah, in both eyes. I'm like, dude, at least wear an eye patch when you're eating ass. Who was that, the Diaz brothers or no? No, no, no, that wasn't the Diaz brothers. But anyway, I'm on like a hundred different things to say. My son, my wife. I'm like, I feel like I'm doing like seven. I'm having like seven different conversations right now. Sorry.
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
I'd go back to people, um, real, some real side show type people.
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
fucking no arms young you know a Chinese guy zero arms right his finishing move is just the soy sauce missile or whatever so he fucking fills his mouth with soy sauce right climbs up the rope somehow has no arms right that right there That's awesome.
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
Climbs up, jumps off the fucking ropes and fucking headbutt somebody while they're laying in the middle.
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
I just think you need more grassroots type of shit. Sometimes things get a little too glossy.
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
Oh, yeah. But we love the wrestling, dude. That was like one of our favorite things. We have the one of the Von Eriks is coming on.
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
Yeah, yeah, thanks. Yeah, I think it kind of surprised me a little bit. I mean, I was talking about this the other day. One of the things that messed with me, it messed with my own ego. It made me think that I knew something about politics, too, which was like a little bit of a weird trap. You know, it's like, oh, yeah, I'm a political guy now, you know?
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
So that was like kind of like a little trap that I noticed that I kind of fell into like at the beginning of this year. Just like getting, you know, like your own ego sometimes trick you kind of. I've had a couple of podcast episodes that week already, and I was so tired that day. It was just like, you know, you have that day. Sometimes you're like, this is not the day for anything.
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
Oh, did you see the address to the Congress? It wasn't Congress address. What was it? Can somebody look it up? He just did it like about one week ago.
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
he's eating a fucking chipotle bowl is this Sunday conversation the audio's barely fucking working yeah it was in there it was like the joint address to I know what you're talking about it was a couple weeks ago dude that if you watch it especially at like 1.5 it is the that's the funniest hour and a half of television I think I've ever seen in my life there's like this white guy that keeps fucking dozing off one team is only allowed to like say how they feel like on little signs or whatever Jimmy Snuka was in there they fucking threw him out dude
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
It's like he was upset about something that happened in Hawaii or whatever, I guess. But yeah, dude, Trump's fucking hilarious, man. I'll say this. It's way more entertaining, I think, when he's in office. But yeah, just the whole thing to me was bizarre. I think it was bizarre how quick... How it felt like you got so close to politics. That was the bizarre thing.
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
Because politics always felt like this invisible space you couldn't get into and you have to be an elected official to be around this thing. But then you start to see, well, a lot of elected officials, it's like they're getting lobbied from certain places. And so many people are like, like the family unit is gone. Fucking both parents are having to work two jobs. Minimum wage fucking sucks.
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
Nobody can stay alive on it. The number one cause of bankruptcy in America is medical debt, right? We're being fucked over by our own fuck. So then you start to realize, oh, well, that whole thing is this fucking system.
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
So since we don't work for anybody, you start to become... Like one thing gets too glossy and then this other fucking grassroots thing starts to become not more respected or anything, but it's just like that starts to become the new avenue, I guess. And I wasn't thinking of it like that, but it just kind of... I think I'm still just shocked that we got to be that close to it. Yeah.
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
And that we were there and yeah, we're all on that bus. And I was like, this is really happening.
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
I think Mexico has horrible fucking cocaine. I'll say that shit right now. Fucking fake ass Columbia with that fucking shit. It helps you paint. I don't give a fuck. Dude, yeah, my buddy and I bought a wet, like two wet grams of Mexican cocaine once, right?
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
Just, no, all the stuff was wet. It was wet. It was fucking wet. And the guy we borrowed it from was wet. I'll be honest with you.
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
I don't know. This dude was just a humid guy. This dude was humid. Yeah, so we got this shit, and we're trying to dry some of it out in the microwave and shit at this motel we're staying at. So Mexico shit is trash, dude. It's killing off so many Americans. Where's that shit coming from, the fentanyl?
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
Yeah, and I wonder, I don't know if Chinese people would do that. Maybe their government would do it. But like even if I'm a human and somebody's like, hey, we want you to produce fentanyl. Like what human knowing what it does to people or whatever would still make that, you know?
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
Right. Yeah, dude. So that was, I think they have bad cocaine. I'm trying to think, you know, I've always wanted to go on a cocaine tour or whatever it's called where they take you to all the cocaine places or whatever. I don't know. How about up North Canada? I just got back from there. Yeah. British Columbia.
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
Do they? Do they? They love it. Especially in the winter time. I didn't even know that. Everybody there is just, they got fucking, some guy, they're all fresh fished out. Everybody's fucking got fish on them. You want to fish? Some guy started talking. He had fucking six ounces of fucking fresh salmon in his lip. Really? Couldn't even fucking hear him. In Vancouver? Some guy, yeah.
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
He was like Holyfield? Yeah, fucking yeah. I used to watch him wrestle, dude. I mean, yeah, I love Canadians, dude. I would love to get, you know, I always have a dream that I would meet my wife in Canada or something.
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
But yeah, Victoria was awesome. Did Victoria BC out there on the island? Did you see any whales? No, we didn't at all. Everybody's pretty in shape up there, too. You know?
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
Oh, you know what there are up there? A lot of Chinese, actually.
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
Yeah. My friend told me that. We had a racist driver that was driving us around. He wasn't racist. He was just like, you know, he would occasionally say something that was, you know... I knew.
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
He just was like aggressive about some of the histories that had occurred.
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
But yeah, so he was talking to us about just some of the different influence that had happened in Vancouver and in British Columbia over the years. And there was a lot of Chinese folks there.
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
Oh, yeah. I don't even do that. I mean, I'll do, you know, I have a couple groups that I've like, yeah, I don't think you should do racism. That's my big thing now. Yeah. What do you get out of it? Yeah, you get to feel good about yourself for a few seconds.
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
Yeah, and then you don't have a lot of friends that are different or whatever. And it's just there's no money in it.
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
Maybe there was. Yeah, I guess. I don't know. I'm not saying I condone it. No, I would love to get a racist historian of racism on to even look at what that's like and where it's at because I think a lot of it's fucking gone. I think some people have issues with different cultures now, but it's just because those cultures are the way that they are.
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
Yeah. I think now if people don't like a certain type of person generally, they still will give someone in that culture –
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
an opportunity maybe just don't uh relate with that culture as much you know or something so it's a lot of times i don't think it's racism it's just might be like that's not really you know that culture it's you know that's not the most funnest culture when i have you know so it's like i think it's just people making choices that they that so it's not racism it's just people like being like man that's not really some shit i want to be around
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
Because I met Josh Morrissey the other day, dude. Okay. Is that how you say his last name?
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
How can you have five guys here and nobody can look up anything? We just don't.
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
You're right. Just fucking get on the Wi-Fi, somebody. No, I met the captain of the Winnipeg Jets the other day at the hotel that I was at.
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
And then, though, I saw somebody in one of their jerseys, and this shit looks tough, bro.
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
fuck i wish you were a leafs fan toronto maple leafs it looks so tough i'm not yeah and um but yeah i'm a winnipeg jets fan but one thing i was like i think some of the canada america stuff the beef part is good because it's fun for fucking um sports sports that shit's fun and in truth i don't think any real americans and canadians would ever hate each other right
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
I said, look, send me back to Venezuela. That's what I say. If they come at me for some shit, I say, send me back to Venezuela. My son. My wife. Dude, it's funny if you talk to somebody who's like from a Spanish country and you don't know any Spanish right now. And they're trying to say something to you. They're like, my son, my wife. And you're like, okay, I don't know what to do, you know?
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
I guess there's two parts of it. One was like the business part of it. It was like, you know, we tried to send the script around. Nobody wanted to make the movie. And so we're like, well, let's just make it ourselves. You know, we'd already spent so much time writing it and talking about it. At some point, that gets weird. It's like you've talked about something so much.
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
Yeah. Which I think is what they should do with those Stolen Valor guys when they bust those dudes at the mall or whatever. And they should make them, they should have to enlist then, you know. But yeah, I felt like we were kind of creating Stolen Valor by saying that we had written a movie. But yeah, it was me and David Spade. And that was amazing just because it's him, you know. It's like.
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
Yeah, it was just cool because, you know, you just see their face and you're so curious about them. And then he's an entertaining guy. Very entertaining.
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. He is. And he had just done so many, like, you know, he's just so funny. And, um, I just thought if I look back on my life, it would, I'd be like, damn, I should, that would have been something that I would have missed out on. And, uh, yeah, I felt like I made the right choice, but yeah, we're going to try to try to put it out ourselves.
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
We're do, um, it's getting edited right now and then we'll get to look at it and then we get to help do an edit ourselves, uh, if we want to.
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
Well, I think it's something got a little subdued there, but I don't know what it was. I don't know if it's hard to know. Like, did some other fighter kind of pop in that was taking some of this team? Did he take a fight where it didn't get a ton of attention? And so that's kind of what happened.
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
Some people say that he lost. Yeah. So I think him against Chandler is going to be great.
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
Oh, Chandler's great, man. Chandler's one of the hardest working dudes. I go to the same gym as him.
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
I mean, you can work out near him, but you don't feel, you definitely feel like you are.
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
Like you have spina bifida or whatever, you know? It's like he's, and no offense, I know people have that.
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
But I'm just saying you feel like you are not. You don't have the same blood as him or something. He's never done damn cocaine, right? Yeah, he hasn't stayed up doing cocaine. Yeah, it's like you realize that you are not a UFC fighter.
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
Yeah, and I think that's one thing. It's like people say is the UFC or they do. What are the new stars going to be like? They've been on such a torrid run of momentum and stars in the past decade. And before that, I mean, I've only been paying attention for seven years. So that's the only reason I say that much time. So no discredit to anybody before that. That's my own ignorance, really.
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
Thanks, dude. I'm taking my mom to the Grand Ole Opry for the 100th anniversary. She was there like 45 years ago or something with her ex-husband who I never met. I would like to meet him sometime in Florida so we can both see if we think the same things about my mom. But yeah, I'm excited about that.
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
I think it'll just be cool, you know? I think Jelly Roll's performing. Oh, sick. Terry Clark, Trace Adkins. There's so many great... Pull that up. There's so many great performers that are gonna be there, you know? And so... And you don't know, I mean, Ernest, you know, I'm sure Hardy, you know, just some of the guys that I, buddies with, and then just some of the heroes.
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
Um, Sherla McGuire, whatever that lady's name is. Um, Tabby Muppet or whatever that, or Muffet, Muffet or whatever. Who else? Maybe Jesse Murph will be, I'm just, you know, so I'm just, and I know my mom loves country music. So, and like kind of bluegrass. Yeah. Who's that?
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
Oh. Post Malone. Sorry, dude. And I know I'm being racist or whatever.
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
Dude, I saw a thing the other day on TikTok. Some kid, you press a button, he's laying in his bed watching TV on the ceiling of his...
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
Oh, Post Malone's a legend. I mean, what do you think about guys getting— Everyone getting a bar?
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
room yeah just some little thing it's a little cube and it plays movies on his ceiling or whatever so i don't you know i think you gotta sneak into people's dreams and fucking show it to them now that's probably the next step yeah dude the next step well i'm sure it's gonna be huge when it comes out i can't wait to see that i don't i mean look i think i don't know if i love the acting part i did love like thinking up lines and sharing those and like because like you'd have like the set it's all right there so you can sneak over and tell the actor like hey try it like this
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
Yeah. Dude, it's kind of interesting. It's easier for me to talk if I'm not the host of it. Do you notice that?
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
Not a ton. You go on Joe's though. I owe my friends. There's some that I owe buddies to. And yeah, I have some friends' pods that I have to go on still. Some I'm just waiting for them to hit me back about it. And they will. Like Tim Dillon, we had such a fun podcast when he came on mine. He's fucking hilarious too.
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
Tim Dillon, I think, is the funniest. I believe he's the funniest podcaster. But I don't know. There's different types of podcasters. Tim Dillon is the funniest.
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
Shane Gillis is great. Well, that's sweet of you, man. Shane Gillis is unbelievable. Matt McCusker, who's with Shane Gillis in Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast, he is amazing. There's so many great ones, man. It's interesting. But it's kind of interesting, like, that podcast is a thing. I don't know.
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
Yeah, and people are like, oh, sometimes people are like, you guys are just, like, sucking Rogan's cock or whatever, you know? I mean— Or cocking his balls.
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
Yeah, just because you're – you also don't have to – you can just stand by his cock and watch his cock.
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
Yeah, that's a way better hypothesis. People always make the hypothesis.
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
I've thought about it. It's like, you want to be, you want to watch somebody who does something great. It's like, it's why you like watching the UFC. It's why you go to the prelims early. It's because, yeah, you want to, you want to see people do it the best or learn from them, you know?
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
But yeah, it's like if somebody bears a path or is like, you know, you want to learn from the best at something, you know. And then also you have to learn you can't do it like them. Like maybe you admire an artist. You're like, oh, I can't do the same art as them. But then, well, what do I kind of do, you know, well? Or how do I do my own art well, you know?
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
I think, because there was a while certainly where you get caught, I don't know if I got caught up in it, but I was like, you know, you have to do it like judo. You have to fucking wake up and bathe with ice or whatever. And like, you know, wash your eyeballs out with fucking, you know, mollusk spit or whatever. Elk semen, yeah. Yeah, just fucking, yeah. It's like, you gotta fucking, you know?
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
And then you have to- That shit burns, right? Probably. Sure. Yeah, it's bad. Yeah. Oh God, yeah, dude. I don't even like that new wedding cake creamer that they have or whatever. What's that? It's like some new flavor that they have from one of those companies or almond. I don't, some of that maybe fucking gets me too activated.
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
But yeah, I'm just saying, you're like, yeah, I want to learn from, I want to watch the best do something, you know?
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
But yeah, just so lucky, man. Sorry I came in here and talked too much.
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
Well, thanks, dude. Thank you guys for the support over the years. I've loved seeing you guys do your thing and be creative and have different hosts in. Yeah. I still communicate with Jesse too sometimes, man. Yeah, me too. And just seeing the guys that you brought in and seeing their different trajectories and then getting to watch their personalities and stuff. It's been entertaining, dude.
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
And Shahidi that works with you guys has helped me so much. I wouldn't have a career. Shout out to John. Shout out to John. I wouldn't have a lot of opportunities I had if you guys hadn't been supportive of me. So thank you, bro. I really appreciate that.
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
We'll see you soon. Yeah. I used to watch you wrestle, baby. Let's go.
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
I was helping. We had a really great director, this young guy named Jonah Feingold. But we were all kind of working together. It was like, because we paid for it. So it's like, you know. It's your money. Yeah, you got to also be involved, you know, or at least trying to help create what you want. But everybody was super helpful. Yeah, I don't know, man. It's hard.
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
It's like some things you do a podcast. You're like, I kind of know how it went this. You do it out of order.
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
Yeah, I think it's just scary because you don't know how it's going to be. And you did it out of order. So it's like you paid for it first. Right. You pay up front. You do it out of order. It's just a fucking horrible business deal. But yeah, anyway.
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
Right. But unless you also tell people up front like, hey. It's a shit. Right. Or it's pretty good. Like this guy was great. End of the story. When we wrote the script, it was really funny. We thought it was funny. So there's a lot of bad shit out there. I think it's as good as that shit.
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
And I haven't even seen, you know. But if it comes out horrible and then they have all these quotes of me saying this, it's going to be alarming. I don't fucking know, dude.
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
Diaz Brothers I saw? Dude, yeah. Even just getting the Diaz Brothers was in there, dude. What were they like?
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
There was some, I would say maybe, I would say light abuse or whatever. Light abuse. Light abuse. Yeah. Nothing domestic. Like if a cop pulled up, he'd kind of wave it off, but he definitely, he'd flash his lights, but still drive off.
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
I mean, they had a Tesla that had weed smoke coming out of it, and every now and then another Diaz brother would pop out of it. It was almost like... One of those clown cars, but these dudes ain't fucking clowns, bro. I'm not saying that at all. If they were, they were the insane clown posse, dude. That's who it was.
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
I think they're just trying to get you to understand that they have a family or something, you know? But there's sometimes... I'm thinking about like if you meet somebody at a gas station that speaks Spanish and they're...
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
It might have been court-ordered. I don't want to say something like that. I don't know.
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
And then the state gets to control where it goes. Ah, I see. So I don't know. I don't know some of the issues that they're dealing with, but... The funniest part about it was... So I'm trying to tell Nate Diaz because the only reason I ever got to go to UFC was David Spade brought me as his friend.
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
Rogan had brought me before. But the way that I kind of, I think, got to maybe meet some of you guys and meet... Dana and stuff was at, David Spade brought me. So anyway, he and I have a good connection about UFC. David and I will watch the fights together sometimes. So we had this part in and it was like, dude, what if Nate Diaz would do it? And we're like, no way, he would never do it.
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
And then, so one time, I'm at the fights, it was probably like six months ago or something. And Nate Diaz is, I think he's leaving the fight or something. So I walk up to him and I don't really know him that good. You know, I've like kind of like cheered him on and stuff. But I don't, I never really talk to him too much personally.
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
and i was like nate hey man we we wrote and it always sounds like the cheesy shit we wrote this movie we thought you'd be great you started as you're saying you just want to fucking come on your own back
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
yeah you know because what you're saying seems kind of geeky you know yeah but um anyway what I don't realize is he's trying to talk to me he's getting thrown out of the fucking venue right I didn't realize this was happening yeah right yeah I still had no idea he's like walking he's like and I'm like I'm wondering why he's leaving in the middle of the fights and we're kind of walking towards the back door I'm like oh he's fucking leaving
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
you know sometimes they're lying to you they say their car their car's broken or whatever my son my wife like having a son is not a pass to just get away with anything you want right you know what i'm saying if you want five or ten bucks ask me for that but don't yeah you can't just say this fictional world where there's a trapped family somewhere because then i drive off yeah i give you five or ten bucks but then i drive off and i'm worried about this group or something you know
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
And he's like, all right, I'll talk to you later. You know, he's like, yeah, we'll talk later about it or something. But then later I saw a video online, a clip, and you could see he's literally getting escorted out by security.
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
I didn't know that. Yeah. He is the only guy that I know that has security, but it's not his, right?
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
Yeah. They just like, uh, I mean, getting to be around him was awesome, dude. You know, he let us FaceTime with his kids one time for a little bit. And like, um, yeah. Getting to see like other parts of his person. It was all awesome. Right. And, but I didn't realize I saw a clip then you can see him get asked for it out. And I'm trying to talk to him.
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
I didn't realize at that moment he was getting thrown out of the venue or whatever. Yeah. So I kind of came up to him and tried to pitch it to him at the craziest time.
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
Because he's yelling, but he threw a water at somebody, you know? He's fucking yelling at somebody. So it was like... But yeah, anyway, it ended up working out. But yeah, it was just cool, man, just to get to be around him, that he would do it. You know, they came and they showed up. You know, I think they were like... They were excited about doing it.
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
You know, him and Chris Avila, who is a friend of his. Yeah, I know Chris. His boy Andrew came. They had fake cocaine on set. He did a couple grams of it. That's good. Which is like, hey, dude, that might be worse for you than real cocaine.
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
He definitely looked like, he looked like if he had a bunch of cocaine stuck in his lungs, probably like when he passes away or whatever, like say they don't say he dies early or something. And I hope he doesn't. If they donated his lungs to a kid or something in the hospital, that kid would fucking right. He'd be, he'd take off. Yeah. You know?
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
I mean, I think if the guy's going to be the next David Goggins or something, you know?
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
Oh, you were in Ireland for St. Patterson? Yeah, we just came back like two days ago.
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
Oh, yeah. Dude, I'll tell you this crazy story. So my friend Megan just texted me. She's like, I was at the Washington Memorial or something. And some guy came up and said, will you take a picture of me and my family at the Washington Monument or whatever? And so I took one and then he took one for me. And then she goes, and then he left. And then I realized it was Conor McGregor. No way.
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
I'm like, she's literally 40 minutes ago. But dude, that was crazy, right? At the inauguration?
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
Well, I was sitting over by Evander Holyfield, dude. Oh. I've told this before, but one time, I'm at the airport. I'm in Chicago, and Walking down the terminal, and they had a McDonald's right there. And they had some tables right kind of by the terminal walk where you're walking. And Vanders Holyfield's sitting right there. And he got him some fries. He got some extra fries or whatever.
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
And you know, I think I'm probably hastily generalizing here. But anyway, have we started? Should we start over?
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
And his mouth works, but it doesn't work. After your mouth's been hit a lot, your mouth doesn't work as much.
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
Yeah, he almost would be better maybe with one of those throat holes or whatever. Right. You know what I'm saying? Because you're fucking... Yeah, yeah, yeah. But he has still... At the time, he's working these... I was just through his... Like a paper shredder. Right. Putting them into his face, right?
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
And there's a sister working down at the Cinnabon. I clocked her about 70 feet earlier. And... Because she had the long braids and they were all getting caught in the fucking frosting and shit. You know, and she's just whipping that shit around over there. You know, fucking slinging C-bonds as bitches on it, right? Yeah. And so, beautiful bitch, sorry.
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
Anyway, I start hearing her run down the terminal, dude. And she runs right up by Vander Holyfield and she looks at him and she's like... I used to watch you wrestle.
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
And then she fucking did six of those, dude, and fucking disappeared. Six hair spins disappeared. But no, it was just this crazy moment where a girl thought that he was a wrestler. Like this guy got his face. He was a world champion. He got his face beaten in and out of his own skin.
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
and then it's just crazy how times like no matter what you do to some lady you're just a fucking wrestler you know that's it you're just after achieving all that doesn't matter doesn't matter if you're fucking sigmund freund you a fucking wrestler this motherfucker used to wrestle with e coli or whatever or like what did he heal
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
So we're on the bus, dude. And yeah, it was just a lot. Everybody's wearing winter clothing. And so that's always a lot, even in its own right.
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
Yeah, it's definitely interesting. We made our own movie, man. So... Is it done? It's done being taped. And then we have to put it together. So it's a mix of... So it's not done. Yeah. It's not done. It's yeah. Dude. Yeah. It was just crazy. It's like, it's a lot of work. I understand why people say like when they talk about movies are like, it was a crate.
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
Oh, dude, Miss Robin, when I was in kindergarten, this lady, Miss Robin, she had kind of like feathered hair, right? Like she had hair like kind of a professional wrestler male.
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Theo Von | Ep. 151
Yeah, kind of like an Australian shepherd and they haven't gotten a haircut yet, right? Like fucking. Right, right. Really cool. She used to let me go outside and watch her smoke on her smoke break. She was the only kid. Like the other kids and they were shitting on themselves and learning a couple letters or whatever. And I was just fucking knew the whole alphabet, dude.
Pivot
Trump's Movie Tariffs, Buffett's Retirement, and Elon's New City
You drink coffee, man, or no? Nah. Really? Yeah. I mean, you've had it.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2253 - Theo Von
Michael Jackson. I watch this. They're just better at covering up what they do. Did they kill Michael Jackson? I don't know. Look at the movie. He was dancing and singing, and next you know he's dying of oxygen. No, not right. A junkie's a junkie's a junkie's a junkie every day. He doesn't wake up singing, dance, and then he has oxygen tanks at night. Something's not right there.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2253 - Theo Von
And in my case, like old school, you're worth more dead than what you are alive. You understand what I mean? And now they got a new record coming out. He ain't in debt no more. He's doing a tour next year with the people from Vegas that jump up and down the Blue Band Group, whatever the hell that is. I mean, he's worth more now than he's ever been. I think Paul McCartney killed Michael Jackson.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2253 - Theo Von
That's what I think. If it was up to me, me knowing what I know, I'd smoke another joint. I'd break it down. I'd break it down because he bought the music from Paul McCartney. He didn't want to give it back to him. And all of a sudden, they put Paul McCartney in the Super Bowl. They tried to build up the Beatles to get their thing going. And all of a sudden, Michael Jackson...
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2253 - Theo Von
i believe it goes it goes a lot longer the best is the end though he says stay black just get to the very back time you listen to your bullshit congressman or your bullshit governor or even a bullshit president somebody who's running for president and he's hitting you with that same four shit that they give you every four fucking years and you still vote for the fucking momo and you get mad think about me saying the word fuck with that i'm out of here i gotta go smoke a cigar very solid points
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2253 - Theo Von
Don't do the... No, I know. Joey, you get it. So I'm with you, but this is just to let the American public know that every four years they buy the same shit they've been buying every four years, and the same people with their Harvard articulation, and how they don't curse, and they're Christians, and they have a family, and these are the same people that shove it up your fucking ass every year.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2253 - Theo Von
The one thing that you get about me is I'll say fuck, but I will not fucking rob you. If I need something, I'll ask you like a man. I know, you're a good guy. Hey, hey, go fuck yourself, you cop. Hold on, hold on one second. Take a joke, take a shuttle. Joey Diaz, Facebook, Twitter, check yourself before you wreck yourself. Big dicks in your ass. Get out of here, we're in trouble. He goes back.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2253 - Theo Von
I'm the umpire. I'm throwing. All right, all right. Stay black, because that's the most important. Okay, okay.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
So a lot of it is that we have a cap on certain salaries, right? And that we also don't have a law that stops people once you work for one side that you can't work for the other. Right, right.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
And I'm not saying that there's – I don't know the answer. I'm just saying that that's one of the reasons why that happened.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Right. That's a good point. Yeah. It's like no one's going to do anything perfectly. I don't know.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
You're going to war with the CIA. He's like that drunk uncle, dude. Bro, what about Barron Trump, dude? There's no credit. Whatever you think about this election, the whole thing to me is fascinating. First of all, because Dana White made so much stuff happen.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
And why in the article? Hey, well, when you herald it, say, hey, this could be a possibility.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Yeah. Well, I think, like, to me, everything kind of started to feel like this privatized communism, right? Like, once the post office didn't work, I was like, the government's fucked, dude. I was like, these bastards can't even get a package to fucking Toledo in two days, dude, you know?
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Right, but you go in there, dude, it's like a West and they're serving liquor at the counter. Are they really? Yeah. The post office? It's gone downhill. They have liquor? I mean, they don't, but you could probably score a gram up there at the counter. It's gone. The doors, there's no hinges. Really? Dude, it's the Wild West over there. Which post office you going to, bro? Every post office, bro.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
All of them are bad? Bro, it's... 75% of the post offices are – it's gotten – but I just use that as an example of like a – it just like started to fall apart, right?
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Yeah. And how many – you mailed in 20 million of them apparently. How many – And at that time, was there a saloon happening in there?
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
They don't want to make the election real. I don't think either one of these parties is what the, people say like Democrat, they're not the same parties it was 15 years ago.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
But they also believe things that mean something to them. So they're not like – because –
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Well, the same people that own this own the publication company. It's just starting to be so obvious. It's like... I don't know.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
At what point does money mean something over the fact of somebody's peace of mind and health and wellness? That's the thing I don't understand.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
That wasn't cool, man. I never took it, and guess what? Doing great. Crazy. Yeah, I'm depressed. I'm suffering from depression. Yeah, had a lot of issues and back pain today.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Fuck, that's a story of my life, dude. Calling people to make sure we're okay.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Yeah, unless it's Pam Anderson's baby, dude. I wouldn't put anything in that kid, you know? And I don't even know if she has any kids or not. And I love Tommy Lee, so I shouldn't have said that.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Well, I think part of me, I've always just wanted to do my own thing. But then you start to realize that there's... That you, yeah, you're doing it by yourself. And I think that goes for like, whether it's work relationships or personal relationships too. You know, I think it's just like, it's been the same psychology for me. You know, like I'm the, I'll think, I never thought about this.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
I'll think to myself, I want to be in a relationship, but I want to do it on my own. I just realized that, dude.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
But it's, that's how, there's something, it's just like. Well, you can marry yourself. People do that. I would hate that, dude. I'm always just chasing myself trying to jerk me off. I wouldn't get any sleep, dude. That would be a nightmare.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Oh, the other night, even just being there, being able to laugh with Tony and like, Ron White was right there. You got Brian Simpson. You got Kurt Metzger. Everybody's just watching and dancing and figuring things out.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
He's like, you don't know about the Vanna White conspiracy? You don't know what's behind the E's? You don't know what's behind the E's?
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Jimmy Dore's cool, huh? I never got to see him for years, but I've always been kind of admirable about him.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
It was fun. Yeah, that was just fun to see. Who else was there?
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Derek's the best, dude, because you tell any joke, if it's good or not, you can look at Derek, and if he's laughing, it's good.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
He's a great green room hang. Yes. He'll let you know on his face immediately. To me, he's the be-all, end-all if something's funny.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Well, I just want people to tell us what's really going on. If they can't really do anything because the lobbyists are controlling everything, I wish somebody would just tell us that.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Well, back then, you could kind of kill somebody, and it was easier, you know? Think about, like, the Wild West, right? Like, if you killed somebody, they drew a picture of you.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Bro, you could literally go across the fucking behind a boulder, shave, come back to the town, get a job as a sheriff, and look for yourself for 20 years.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
I don't know if I saw that. I'm trying to think of what I saw. Tony was nervous, remember? Tony better be fucking nervous. Dude, I kept just going up to him and going, Feliz Navidad. To fucking get his vibes.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Have you seen that show From on Amazon Prime? I haven't. Pretty good. Yo, you know what I've been watching, though, on Netflix? What is it?
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Yeah, I guess... can stress be that compartmentalized inside of you and it comes out like that?
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Fuck. Usually it's the second season before you get a handicapped kid.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Right. I'm sure there's something in most people that feels like, hey, that's not right. Let's shut it down. Let's go outside instead.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
You know, well, people say this a lot. I mean, I'm from obviously Louisiana. People say, you know, they're always like, hey, you know, you ever fucked your sister?
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
And the thing what happened was people didn't live close to each other. So if you you're not going to travel. you're only gonna travel so far to- Are you advocating for fucking sisters? Fuck, no, I'm not. What are you saying? It seems like that's what you're doing. No, I'm saying this is what happened back then. People aren't gonna get a train ticket to come.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
People are only gonna have sex within a certain distance of their- Right, good call. Right, that's why it happened.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
You know, it's like, if a guy, it's like. There's no one there. Right. There's nobody there.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
They didn't have to, but at a certain point they got lost and ended up back at, right by the house. You know, like something's got to happen here. I'm not saying it's cool. I'm just trying to tell you how it works out. Like, you know.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Oh, yeah, dude. I was staying at my buddy Brad's house one night, right? We're dead asleep, right? And they let a bunch of puppies loose, dude. Those things are fucking gangbanging you. I didn't have a chance, dude. I didn't have a fucking ounce of milk on me, and those things are fucking sucking me off, bro.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Right. It's crazy how it goes from animals to people, man.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
We're animals. Do you think there's a certain purpose for us, like there's a magical purpose for us, or do you think we are just an anomaly?
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Yeah, I almost feel like I know more. I wish I didn't know more stuff. Sometimes I miss knowing nothing.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Oh, yeah. You're a library, dude. I'm more like a red box where you rent that one movie.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
But you are a library. There's certain types of people that can make it through certain things.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Oh, that's interesting. You don't think about the side effects of somebody being able to have a memory that records so much.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Right, but if you know that exists, then it's always a possibility.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Yeah, it's crazy how therapists make like $150 an hour, right? Right. But cops, who are basically therapists that also have to shoot at people, make $40 an hour.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
That's crazy, dude, when you think about that. It's crazy.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
But if you paid them like heroes, I feel like that they would more more fucking gladiators would show up and do it.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
And they would have a real force out there, you know, and you would fall asleep at night knowing that severe warriors were taking care of your fucking community.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Yeah, get fucked. When that kind of shit happens, they shouldn't be helping these other countries. I don't know why we send money to Israel, Ukraine. I just don't understand why we there's just people suffering here. You know, there's people that have been taken advantage of in our own country. And it's like you don't want to be selfish.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Oh, yeah. I'd be at home out here. Somebody opened a jar of Pringles and I'd fucking pull on them, you know? Yeah. You hear that top pop? Yeah. What's going on? Dude, we had a police officer on a few years ago or about a year ago. Can you look this up? Jamie, is it okay to ask him to look something up?
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
But if you don't take care, if you don't know your inventory, then your business is going to fail. Right. That's a that is. That is a law. If you don't take stock of your own inventory, your business will fail. And we don't have stock of our own inventory and we don't have a healthy inventory.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
You know, it's like, it's just like, I don't understand how it's so, I don't, the weird thing is I start thinking, is that a radical idea?
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
And some people... Yeah, we try to pretend that don't exist.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
We try to pretend that don't exist. Sorry if I stepped on you.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Yes. This guy, retired police officer, Sergeant Brad White. This guy was super unique. He lived in Los Angeles, but he told this story. He he he was he didn't have any political thoughts. He just told stories of what it was like being a police officer. And he told the story of his first day on the job. They're chasing a guy. The guy runs into traffic, gets hit by a vehicle and killed. Right.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
This year's just been, it's just been, it's been like every time I'm not doing a podcast, I have to like, I'm traveling for work or it's like, it's just been a busy time.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
No, I think it would be good because I think there's enough people there where you could do it.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Well, that would be cool, man, because at least I know the area. I could be, you know.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
I love you too, man. Thanks for being inspiring. And thanks for, yeah, sometimes you would like, I would do a podcast episode and you would just say, you would reach out and say, hey, man, I like that episode. And it just meant a lot. I just want to let you know that.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Well, thanks. Thanks, man. Yeah, I think it means a lot to people when somebody they admire says something nice to them. It's just nature.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
So even as just a human being, you're just doing a job, but then you're trying to compartmentalize or what effect did I have on this? He told this story of a mother had called and said that her son was... was thinking about committing suicide, right? The mother meets him in the yard. He shows up. He's a police officer. It's outside of Los Angeles, I think in Whittier Police Department.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
I could be wrong. He shows up. The mom meets him outside. They see the son comes into the doorway, right? It's like a glass door with another door behind it, kind of. Takes his own life, right? Kills himself right in front of them. So now he's standing there with the mom.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Now he has to go, he has to go, he has to console the mother, then go inside of the home. He walks inside. The door won't open because the man's body is there, right? He's having trouble getting it open. Even just that moment. He gets it open. Something falls off of the ceiling down the back of his shirt. And it's part of the guy, his brain matter. He had shot himself on the ceiling.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
So I know that's graphic and stuff. But and then for the next three or four hours, he has to take care of this scene with this little feeling between his bat wings or whatever. What is that? No, inside of your body.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
And it's just like, that's just a regular guy. He might not even have finished college or something. So just the baffling amount of stuff that police go through. Anyway, I was trying to just like, those are stories that stuck with me when I spoke with that guy. It was like unbelievable.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Yeah. And they don't even... I think the highlight, like they usually, they used to play like softball in our area against like the fire department. That was like the highlight of it. You know, it was like having like competition, you know, but I don't even like if you defund them, they're not even super funded. You don't ever see a cop with like a boat or, you know what I'm saying?
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
This was like when I got that hair surgery. You know what I'm talking about? They play music in the background?
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
That's true. I think a lot of cops will start making albums from their cars. Yeah. But there really should be some there should be a great producer that goes on a ride along with a police officer this is gonna happen watch and makes a Dope track with a cop right and the and you could make a dope need of so much great visuals right and the proceeds go towards Supporting the police department.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Oh, yeah. That's crazy right there. That's 50. I think 44.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Yeah. My Grammy won't nominate anybody. She liked Traveling Wilburys.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
I mean, I didn't. I mean, if my grandfather showed up and said, hey, they're good, I respect that a little bit more, but that's just me, you know. Lainey Wilson I love. She's great. Red Clay Strays, Stephen Wilson Jr.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
What was I thinking? I feel all over the place today, Joe. You ever feel like that?
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Well, did they say that the most people they'd ever seen at voting stations were this year?
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Maybe because people were sitting at home and so bored and they said it's that much to do, you think? Could be.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Yeah, I mean, they give Christopher Columbus as a holiday, dude. The Lieutenant Dan of the 1400s. That dude gets a fucking holiday, okay?
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Well, then why do you think the cities and states are so much different then?
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Celebrate it. It's a great day. People can rejoice. Cookouts. Yep. It would take a lot of stress off people, too. It's like today's also a day of celebration. It's not this day that I have to sneak away from work. and be sneaky or whatever, and pee in my car.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
I don't have his number. I don't know. There's a guy in his department. I have his number. We could hook it up.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
My brother, actually, my brother's a lot smarter than me, and he said, hey, man, I just want you to think that there could be some reflection from people if you have him on, right? Like you could – some people could be upset about it.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
You know? And I thought about that a little bit, and I was like, well, I don't really – Like, I don't know, you know, like, I have political thoughts and beliefs and stuff like that. And it's like, it's hard to find a group that really embodies them. And if anything, right now, for me, it seems like I don't even feel like these new parties are the same as the old parties.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
It doesn't seem like this isn't Democrats and Republicans. There's something else transmorphing right now.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
And so I thought, like... I thought, well, I think I'm... I just want to be able to have a chance to talk to this guy, you know? And the main thing for me was like... Like you talked about Dana White earlier. He's really... You know, I know that you guys work together and he... You know, I knew that Trump's brother suffered from addiction. Right. I knew that. Right. I heard that or something.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
And I looked into it is like, OK, he lost his brother. His brother died of addiction. So I was like, well, that's interesting to me, you know, and I wish that people I wonder if there's more to Donald Trump.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Like, is there more of a way to talk with him about something that means, you know, try to get an emotional well, like more of an emotional well to him that then it seems like that's in the public.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Yeah, that's the same thing they asked us. Is there an edit?
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
I like to meet people where they're at. If I see somebody, I'll be like, what's happening, my friend? I like to meet people where they are.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
I remember that shit. I'll fucking make a nest in my living room, dude. That shit, boy. I'll scoot over to the neighbors and steal some twine in my beak, homie. There's nothing worse than being locked out of your place on cocaine, man.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
She's still all right. She got that thang on her, I bet. So this... You know what I'm saying?
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Because a lot of brothers love her, too. Everybody seems to love her. Look, if the brothers like it, she got that thang on her. That's all I'm saying, you know?
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
He told us the other day that it was just the other day. Yeah. But meanwhile, he said it three weeks later. It wasn't just the other day. It was three fucking weeks ago, dude. You're repeating the same shit.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Yeah, you got too many leap years, white boy. Yeah, shit like that.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
You know? But the thing is about Trump... You're not following the Grateful Dead here. Trump rambles. Trump has a lot, though. Trump has a lot that are repetitive.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
I've been to Lincoln's bedroom. How was it? It was okay. I think you can bring it up, actually. It's in Springfield, Illinois.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Oh, no. I've been to just his childhood before he got elected.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
It's really interesting. He used to keep his notes in his hat.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Well, I think a lot. It seems like a lot like a lot of Democrats. I don't know like a ton about politics, but it seems like a lot of Democrats like it's I understand a lot of the voting because it's hopeful voting. It's like wishful thinking.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
No way. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's the guy from Monopoly, too, right there.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
They should have a diaper round. We have to fight and shit at the same time.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Dude, I don't think there's a way you can shit and punch at the same time.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Look that up. Very hard. Because, yeah, think about it. Yeah.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Look, you're getting your liver pounded on. You're getting kneed in the guts. Oh, I got in a car accident once and it happened. You shit yourself? I didn't want to. I didn't have a choice. It just happened. It wanted to.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
You think... Yeah, I went to that fight with you. Or no, I went to that fight. Remember when me and Joey Diaz went? Which one? In New York. Oh, it was... Oh, I was thinking of your fighters. Well, I went and saw the James J. Braddock statue before. It was in New Jersey. Before Dustin and... That last fight that he had. No, the one before the last fight. Justin Gaethje? No, after that.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Which one was in Jersey? Islam? That one was in Jersey. He didn't beat Islam in Jersey. Right.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Yeah, I went with Joey, and I went to the James J. Braddock statue before. It was awesome, dude. Islam's a monster. He's so good. Yeah, it was crazy. And Joey was like, dude, he was awesome. This is all love, dude. He's fucking tremendous. He's one of a kind. And his book is great, too, if you haven't read his book. But he's sitting there. He'd been eating mushrooms, you know?
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
And a lot of it is... People are robbing each other on Facebook Marketplace.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
And once he even started eating a little, you could see Aaron Rodgers start to look over. He was getting curious. He's like, what is happening? That's hilarious. But by the sixth quarter or whatever, I don't know how the fights go, but it's like by the sixth quarter, he's just rubbing on his thighs, right? He's fucking... He goes, who's winning dog? That's what he kept saying to me.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
It's one of my favorite things that I ever learned about him.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Yeah, it's almost like a football player kind of putting on their helmet.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
I'm going to come back and look in about a week and a half.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
You're just talking to plumbers or whoever's got a decent attitude or whatever, you know, decent sense of humor.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
That was insane, man. I think that's one of the... But yeah, people are robbing each other on Facebook Marketplace. My buddy was going to buy a couple of walkie-talkies off a guy, right? Gets fucking mugged, right? Really? Yeah. He was going to buy a couple of... So he meets the guy to go get the walkie-talkies and the guy mugs him? That's like the seventh story I've heard.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
26% more Puerto Ricans voted for Trump. Bro, he had the Puerto Rican app open on his whoop bracelet. I'm like, they have that? What is that? He was like, how many plantains have sold tonight?
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
He said that Puerto Rico was a pile of garbage. These are human beings.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
the joe rogan experience train by day joe rogan podcast by night all day
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
So it was like both sides would have disliked Tony Absolutely, absolutely He would have had to go to Puerto Rico or Costa Rica.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
But it's like, you know, people are doing crime, you know, people are resorting to crime. And that's when it's not good, I feel like.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
I could see that because you're both Latino cultures and you want to be the best, you know?
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
I'm trying to think if I've ever been to a boxing match or not.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
And it was like two guys beating each other up in baby diapers or whatever. Baby diapers? Yeah, bring it up. They were wearing big diapers or whatever.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Maybe I'm not thinking about it. Maybe I'm thinking about something else then. But it just kept hugging.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Who would you rather knock you unconscious, you think, if you had to pick a good fighter?
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
That's crazy, dude. I can't even get a fucking medium jacket off of my body, and this guy's doing this shit? That's what blows my mind, dude.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Oh, yeah. If I'm a criminal and they're like, hey, it's crime time or whatever, I'm going to fucking put on my cleats or whatever.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
He was terrified. Tony was terrified. Right when I walked in, I hadn't seen him in months. I'm just fucking grilling him. I'm like, there he is. I'm like, who's an island now? That's what I said. He's fucking sitting there.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Yeah. And here's the best thing about Tony, though. He laughed. Like, Tony is for the joke, right?
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Like, even if he's, like, going through it, he respects the joke.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
There's many layers to that whole thing. It's like, Tony is who he is. Yeah. And you almost, you respect that to the core. Was it the best timing? Probably not, right? No. Was there a lot of supervision over what he said? No.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
It's disorganized, but it's also real. So it's like there's two ways to look at it. It's like, yes, it's like nobody proofread it.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Yeah. It's like catch and release. It's almost like the fishing rules or whatever.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
We did it. Yeah, he's just so silly. But he's the guy. But he laughs at himself. Oh, totally. But also he's, it's weird because it's like, do you want things to be tailored or do you not want them to be tailored? You know? Yeah. It's like you could have a group that goes through every single joke and says no to everything. Right. And then you get nothing. You know what I'm saying?
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
It's like how many layers of like when you drain spaghetti or whatever I'm talking about. Like how many layers of. Spaghetti. Nah, shit. I don't know. It's been a long year.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Some of the speeches were like, what do you... Yeah, they had 40 minutes of ASMR in there. They were fucking letting people do anything.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
We had a brother. He would slash everybody's tires. But then here's the thing. We were giving him a ride home. So it was like, well, now we're all fucked. But that's who he was. You had to respect him. He was a power forward, you know?
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Nick Bosa got brave and shared his political thoughts the other night. You see that? No, I didn't. It's just crazy how on mainstream stuff, if you share anything one way, it's okay, but you share something another way, it's not okay.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Where Jimmy Kimmel called Donald Trump that? No, no, no, no, no, no. Bautista. That Bautista did?
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Did you have a good time? Yeah, you know what I did? I thought it was like... Let me think about what I thought it was like. Uh...
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Is he the Intercontinental Champion? I haven't watched wrestling in a bit.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Yes, it was like, excuse me, fish. Yes, gentle cast. Yes. It was like, hey.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
It was baffling, man. I mean, here, I'll tell you. It was, uh...
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Well, Hollywood's just crazy to me, dude. I just don't understand it. Like, it seems like they hate white men.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
You can't, like, if you have a kid or whatever, you can't do it. Right. Like, if you're just fishing on the bank, you can have your kid, and you can be sitting there smoking or whatever your kid likes to do, you know? But if you're in that, you have to constantly be moving it.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
You know? It's very kind of like... It's kind of homoerotic almost. It's like, hey, fish, or whatever.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
But they're treated better than the people in Gaza, though.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Look at Fyre Fest. Remember Fyre Fest or whatever? Yeah. What the fuck was that, dude? That was a dude trying to make money. Right, but still, those people got carded over there. Yeah. Nothing to eat, nowhere to sleep. Definitely different than slavery, but still, it's like, yeah, it's funny. You think just because things happened a long time ago that it's not slavery today, right?
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Well, I wouldn't say that Fyre Festival is a form of slavery.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Because a lot of them gay producers trying to crank out them twinks, homie. That's why, bro. Keeping my slaves? Yeah, bro. Every now and then.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Every now and then a frickin' some twink fucking clambers out of an air vent.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Yeah. Speeding, you need to have a car, and you're like, you're speeding.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
No. Prisons are owned by corporations. Okay. So prisons own corporations.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
What about the Excalibur in Las Vegas? That place is a fucking private prison, dude. You ever been there?
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Yeah. Oh, shit. I think we got one. Oh, shit. It's like Jaws all of a sudden.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Yeah, and we need a few more in there, too, I think. Yeah. To be honest, bro, freedom is, hey, some people can't handle freedom.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Oh, that's Zenz or something? Yeah. Breakers? You scared of it? You have a vape on you? This is non-alcoholic. I have this. What is that?
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
I'll take a hit of anything, dude. I'm about to fucking jerk off just to get high, dude.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Yeah. My grandma used to take us fishing, dude, and she was like a...
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
malignant fisherman or whatever and she would um degenerate yeah like very she was like a staunch fisherman like staunch like we're fishing you know oh aggressive you better not fucking not fish you know she would like kind of have that kind of behavior yes she was very you better fucking fish white boy whoa you know she would kind of be like that yes very aggressive right about fishing for little kids yeah
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
I mean, one of my eyes just shut down. Yeah. And I like it. It's like, how far can we go? There's something about doing something. It's like, I think when you have addiction, you want to do something that harms you. Is that what it is? Yeah. You want to fucking... Because it's control. It's like, I want to control how I feel.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
So even if how I feel isn't great, there's a weird juxtaposition where it's like, if I have control over it, then that's... It's almost like you're the devil that's trying to kill you, you know? Does that make any sense?
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Yeah, there's something about having control about how you feel. So even if you feel damaged, you still did it to yourself. There's like, I don't know, man, I'm doing the worst job.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Yeah, self-destructive. It's like just things feel so hectic right now. At least if I damage myself, then I'm the one doing it. I'm not just letting the world do it, right? In the moment, you don't see that that doesn't have any value.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
We had such a good time. That green room was so positive. My favorite part, at one point, they were playing that song, you talk about a revolution. People were dancing. People were smoking weed. I think there was a baby smoking weed. Everybody was like, people were like, it was crazy, dude. Adam and Eve were in there.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
And we'd have to be quiet and look straight out and wait for the bobber. But she was really, she loved to fish.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Yeah, I mean, Mothership's fun, man. I've been wanting to look for a place where I just haven't had the time.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
This year's been the craziest year. It's just been a crazy year.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
It's been scary. It's been fun. I appreciate the couple times. You've messaged me after a couple episodes and said, hey, man, I like that or something. I really appreciate it. I want to let you know that I really appreciate that.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
So it's like, well, I just want to have a voice, you know, I always just wanted to have a voice ever or not even, I just want to, I don't know.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Yep. She liked to skin them and grill them and everything.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
I just wanted things to be fair and I just want to express. I just like, yeah, there was always this feeling inside of me. Like I don't have a, I can't speak up for myself, you know?
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
And even if I'm just listening to somebody, but letting them speak, it's like, there's still like something that, you know, it means it's like, I can't even explain it, but it's like, it's so, it's like, I don't know. It means something to me.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Mostly catfish, bullheads. We used to fish up in like Spoon River up in like Illinois.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Yeah, man. Dude, I had a lady who had been driving cats across the country for two years in a fucking tour bus, right? And they perform and they do musical acts. And, bro, I'm not even joking to you. It was one of the most fascinating things I've ever heard in my life.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Because her commitment to it. Imagine she got her CDL so she could drive the fucking bus because it was so expensive. What's a CDL? Commercial driver's license. Oh. And she goes around doing feline shows around the whole country. And she's been doing it for 15 years.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
We would get out there. We'd have a little thermos full of chicken liver.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
I used to live with this dude. Right. And I ended up doing fucking a lot of drugs or something, whatever. And I fucking cut a window into my closet, dude. And it was to the neighbor's apartment. I thought it went outside. I got kicked out. Oh, my God.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
My grandfather would say anything and she'd fucking look at him. He wouldn't talk for a month after that.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
It's so weird. Well, yeah, dude, I'll say some things. Here's things that, like, whatever you think about, the guy is as resilient. No one could go through all that shit. When the Justice Department started to fuck him over, that's when a lot of people were like, you know what? the only thing we should be able to believe in in this country is at least the justice system.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
And if they're fucking him over, and then he got shot at a couple of times, dude, he's a quarter of 50 cent. You know what I'm saying? He's like, so it's like, what else does it, you know, at a certain point, you're just like, I gotta bet on this dog. You know, even if it's like you don't even like him. It's like, this motherfucker, this dude, you got to bet on that dog.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
She was. The fisher woman. Yeah, she loved to fish. I think she liked catching her own meals. She didn't like to hunt, but she liked to fish.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Yeah, fight, fight. Dude, I stubbed my toe. I called my assistant a faggot. So yeah, there's something special about that guy.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Well, why? I don't understand why left-leaning media, which is mostly Jewish, are calling people white supremacists, dude. Jewish. Did you say that? Yeah, I just don't understand. Left-wing media is mostly Jewish? I mean, according to my Jewish friends, it is, you know?
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Yeah, you're just being a little secret care bear or whatever.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Oh, yeah. If I was ever in office, dude, Native Americans are getting a lot of shit back immediately, dude.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Yeah, but did they want casinos? I want them to have back whatever they want.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
They're getting the rivers back. They're getting the lakes back. They were taking it from each other too, dude.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Everybody acts like Native Americans were like everybody's just like whistling and just shaking hands, but they were fighting. Yeah, 100%.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Imagine not being able to surrender because you have no choice but to fight to the death. That's wild.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
So if you so so is it weird that we feel bad about that? Like, is that a trap? Like, that's what I'm wondering. Does that make does that question make sense?
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Because sometimes there's this vision that you romanticize that culture, right? I do that a lot. I romanticize things that I don't know about, right? Because there just seems like something like, oh, that's romantic or something, you know?
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
You're a fucking warrior, right? Suddenly you get a fucking couple of bumps.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
It was like the first Burning Man, dude. That place was a dump, dude. I heard the penta didn't even have any chicks on it, dude.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
I romanticize nature so much, and it's really vulgar, isn't it?
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Right, like we're civilized on the outside, but there's a part of us that will always be uncivilized?
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Yeah, Memphis, first of all. Is Memphis that bad? Memphis is bad, dude.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Actually, Graceland, you know what's crazy about Graceland, dude? It's in Memphis. And it's cool. You go out, they let you in the backyard after the smoke, and Elvis' grave is right there. You could smoke right in front of Elvis' grave? You could smoke 17 centimeters from Elvis' grave or 80 centimeters.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
No, there wasn't. Well, yeah, there was. Jesus, probably. Who else? Maybe Jesus.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
What do you think you, what do you, what are you going to do when you die, dude?
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
First thing you're going to think is this dude's gay as fuck, I think. With that robe. Yeah. Some dude has a checklist or whatever.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
I might walk up to him, but I put sunglasses on first, dude.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
You have to stay up late to do it, I feel like. I feel like it's like a late-night activity.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Until past 1. Yeah. Past 1 a.m. I like to get to bed at a decent hour.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
It wouldn't be fair if he did that. It wouldn't be right. I think the craziest thing is I think if you – the first gay dude must have been like, what's going on? Like he's sitting there with his wife or whatever and his buddy comes over to just look around or whatever because they didn't have that much stuff back then.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
And his buddy comes over just to look around or tell him about an animal he saw or something. And he just starts thinking, man, I'm going to fucking – I bet I'm going to get this little rabbit.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
What do you think if the thoughts have to come into your head? Something puts the thoughts in you. I think it starts in the thoughts. I don't think it starts in the DNA.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Yeah, Jeff, what's his name, used to party there. Jeff from the comedy store.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Just spray and stray kind of thing. Like Monsanto or whatever.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
And just as there's people that's gay, there's people that are non-sexual at all, really.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
if you're being plural, you're, I don't understand it. Like if you're being plural, are you being like, there's more of me kind of like, that's what I understand. Is it like an ego trip? Like that's, you know, like that's what I don't understand about the.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Yeah, what if you're just jerking off at your house? Are you in that or what? Like, what is that? Who are those people?
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
You see that robot cutting hay the other day? I did not. Pull that up if you don't mind, Jamie.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Yeah, it was like a little bit of like a, not a slave bot or whatever.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
That'd be cool, but then like the second you start, you gotta run, they're gonna be like, oh right. And then they'll run, it's gonna take half a second, half a second kills everything.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
But don't you think at a certain point that we shouldn't have that? At a certain point, shouldn't AI, if it doesn't help us be human, that at a certain point we should stop it? That's how I feel like.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
They just, I saw, they, what were we talking about a second ago?
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Oh, they're killing people at the airport. You want another hit of those? Yeah, I'll take another one, man. I need another soda or something. You got anything on you in here?
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Wrist curls. Well, it's amazing whenever you take, like, any jiu-jitsu classes, how the first thing you start to learn is just control the wrist.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
It would seem like I would be scared to be that tall in MMA because there would be more of you to be attacked by.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
People say that he's Dana White's favorite fighter. Is that the truth, do you think? Or is that just a myth?
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Nothing. He's cool. He's just... He doesn't... Yeah, he didn't, like, send you an email update or whatever.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
He's just like a... Just decides he's queer. Yeah. He's like a secret... Not secret. He's like... He's just like a, or I don't even know what they call it. I got to look at the chart or whatever.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Boom. Bro. Wow, dude. Bro. Bro. If that dude ain't good at gift wrapping, you got the wrong guy, bro.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Yeah, it's crazy how many of those guys would be like Hollywood stuntmen, you know?
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
And at first, the first two rounds, you're like, what is this like? What's going on? Khalil's in it. They're both in it. But then you start to see that Pereira's hunting. It's like this hunting thing.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
yeah the pressure never ends yeah and you're like oh my god it's like literally watching one of those snake like a snake when they're just kind of like like did you see that snake that ate that deer was like a 77 pound deer or whatever yeah i did see that you did of course i see all that shit it's crazy dude bring that up bring that up that big dog i'm glad he says snake because that's kind of how perera moves
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
And he operates at his own speed. He's almost like Alvin Kamara is a football player that does that. He operates at his – it's a speed you've never seen. It looks normal, but it's –
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
That's a good point. Yeah. Because everybody that's doing great, you want to stay as long as you can. It would be weird if you didn't probably.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
I know you talk about him a lot. I've heard you speak about him a lot.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Did he win? No, he didn't win. Aw. No. I went to Maui not too long ago, maybe four months ago.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Yeah, but we went to the place where the fires were. Oh, yes, the fires. Blew my mind, man. It's still nothing, right? It was unbelievable. Yeah. It was just like – it was unbelievable to see what had occurred, you know? And just like – it's crazy how quickly we just as like – how we move past certain tragedies, you know, like we don't mean to, it's just the news cycle does.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
I don't know what that means. I can barely handle whatever I am, dude. To be real honest, bro.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Especially in one of the most beautiful places that our country has to even exist.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
And it's hard to figure out there, Joe, because a lot of people, they live as, like, second and third generations all living in the same home. Right. And they've also – a lot of – you know how Hawaii is. They, like – they'll, like, take little pieces of land. It's like, you know, people will build, like, something small and just live in somebody else's yard, that kind of thing. It's very, like –
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Whatever I am, bro, it keeps jerking off at night and being afraid to talk to women. So whatever that one is, that's what I am, bro.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Well, I think that's a weird thing when you don't feel like as a person that your government is going to support you. I think that's, but that's probably like a feeling why.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Yeah, I remember I went there. I just walked up to the fire department that was like up the hill from there. Oh, man. And I just walked up and I was like, hey, I would like to, is there any way that I could go see what happened?
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
No, I don't know. You know, I think I get afraid to, like, I just, I've always got afraid to approach women, you know?
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Well, it would be very scary as just a regular person. So I'm either going to lose my land to here or to here.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Yeah, and people will say like, well, your tax dollars don't affect it. But at a certain point, it's not even about that. It's just like, do you not... Like, if I'm an American and I'm contributing to this business by being an American and being part of the system, does the system not care about me, you know?
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
But I guess everybody thinks about that in different ways, so... Well, I think whenever you have a system... I don't know, man. I'm out of my mind.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
I don't know. I think something I just... Childhood shit? Yeah, probably. There's something, you know, just... Yeah, like I just... I would just be so fucking nervous, buddy. You know, when I was a kid, I would be so nervous. I would... Yeah, I would be so nervous.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Yeah. But when people start to lose their purpose, like if you start to lose your sense of being an American, that's big for a lot of people, right? So then it's a sense of purpose, right? One of the senses of purpose is I feel like that we get, or like having a job, having a family or somebody that loves you or that you love, or being a part of a country, right?
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Being a part of a fabric of a society. And when those things start to erode, some of those things, And if you don't have any other ones to back it up, then people get really rogue.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
No, he just seems like just an older guy who kind of likes being Donald Trump.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Well, I think you need a businessman to do this. It's not a... We don't live in this Care Bear world anymore. Our politics, it's become a dirty fucking business. So I think you want a businessman in there. I don't care if somebody's attitude... Can the guy do business? Then that's who I... Because it's not... It's all business now. Like we've been, it's been sold out.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
It's like, I don't feel like it's this. I don't know. Does that make any sense, dude? Sorry, dude. I'm fucking having a day, man. No, don't apologize.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Well, I think I was familiar with being nervous, so that didn't affect me.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Yeah, it is business. But you want a shrewd businessman. I don't need Mary Poppins in there, right? I don't need somebody to tell me everything's okay. I need somebody to make our fucking food safe. I need somebody to make our streets safe. And that's all I really need.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
I feel like if I'm paying taxes, then those are the things that I should expect at my FDA and at my police department, which I'm paying for, are going to be able to... Make sure that I can raise a family and raise them healthily and make it home from work to see my children. I feel like I don't have any children yet, but I already feel, you know, that's what I feel like people want.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Oh, the audience is, when you're on stage, the audience is just a woman. Oh, like you're just trying to get them to like you. You're just trying to get, yeah, you're like, how do we get this to work out, you know? How do I get you to like me more? Who do I have to be? Dude, the other night was crazy. Sorry, I cut you off.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Well, I felt a sense of like even after the election was over, I felt like people everything just felt kind of calm.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Right. I've never expected politics to have any effect on my life. Even when I was a kid, I didn't. My mom told us don't ever depend on the government for anything. You just have to figure it out. They used to have some rich dude or whatever. Our street, it would cut between the highway and this other road where people would go. They had a guy who was a veterinarian or whatever.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
He would go down our street. He would stop and throw out... He was a veterinarian. And he would throw animal carcasses into our ditch and shit, right? Jesus Christ.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Yeah, dead animals. Different animals. Nothing really, I would say, medium size. Probably 32 waist and lower, right? Right. He would throw those bitches out into the fucking ditch. I guess to just get rid of them. And our neighborhood was like the poor neighborhood. So it was like, who gives a fuck about these people, right? What an asshole. Totally. Just throw them on the streets?
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Throw them in the ditch. But we called the police and they'd be like, yeah, we'll help. And they would never come, you know. And my mom was like, don't ever. I remember telling her, do not ever expect the government to fucking help you do anything. You have to do shit yourself, you know.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
And he would just throw those bitches. And sometimes it would be, you know, after they died or whatever, like... After they, like... You know, after the bones got blanced or whatever by the sun, we would fucking throw, you know, do like games or shit, but nothing. What? Or, you know, throw them at each other. You guys would throw in bones at each other? Yeah, fucking six rib cages there. Yeah.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Yeah, we had a good time. But nothing like that snake head in that ditch. Bring that thing back up, dude.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
I got nothing, man. No, the other night was crazy. This week's been crazy. It's just been a crazy week. Yeah. You know? It's been a crazy week, man.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Yeah, I'm trying to think of what was in our biome or whatever.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
You know, I'll get to ask my mom, I guess. Yeah, that snake was crazy. That's the crazy thing to me, man, is seeing a snake eat something like that.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
I would guess 150,000. Oh, no, that's even low, I bet. I would bet 200,000. 500,000.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Yeah, and the guy you're asking is probably like, yeah, it's probably fire.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Dude, that's a 77-pound deer. You see that? Yeah, dude. That thing is a damn sixth grader, dude. They eat alligators.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
But how long does it, I mean, it's unbelievable. But how long, that's Satan working as well. And how long does it take? How long does it take a snake to digest? Like how long does it take once it gets that deer?
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
No comfortable way to sleep. What do they do with the antlers, man? Well, they must die. I'm sure they just get to that point and the rest of the body is deceased.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Yeah, they'll see them sometimes hooked together. Yeah. I mean, nature's danger. Nature is really, really unbelievable. That's the number one person in the world.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Yeah. And you're like, what is it? And some channels are like, and then every channel is kind of different.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
That's like when you're in a threesome, but nobody wants to touch you.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
But don't you hate that, though, like when you're eating and somebody, you're done eating and they're still eating?
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Yeah, like you're at a restaurant and they're done, right? They're done and you have to fucking, you're done. And they're still just.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Yeah, but then you feel like you have to pretend like you're still like scraping your bowl or whatever.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
I think it's crazy to sit there and watch somebody eat. Do you? Yeah, bro. Why? Because, dude, they're eating. Yeah, but you were eating with them, too. Yeah, but you're done. So what? Now you're just going to fucking look at them?
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Yeah, pythons, whales or whatever. Big animals. Dude, it's crazy like how they have all those Airbnbs now where it's like you can stay in like a hollowed out whale carcass out here on the pocket. You know, it's like.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
like airbnbs bring up some airbnbs please sir they've gotten weird it's like welcome to this uh it's like oh yeah it's like welcome to this two-story whale carcass down here at punta verde mexico they make up it's like punta every month there's a new punta in mexico you're like what the fuck are we doing renamed a city every time it's like welcome to fucking punta pescado mexico you want to stay in this two bedroom you can stay in that it's a potato i
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
John Daly's unbelievable, dude. Every time I go somewhere, every time he's there, an ambulance takes him home. It's fucking unbelievable, dude. Every time I'm there, it's almost like he hits a hole in heaven, dude. I'm like, this motherfucker's headed. One time, the ambulance came. They came in to look for him. He went out and sat in the ambulance to ride home with him, bro.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Dude, do you see that golfer girl, though, the girl that smokes, the female John Daly, dude?
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Sorry, that's insane. That sounds like a death threat. John Daly is like... Also, man, if she could be married, I have no idea.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
I don't know. I'm just fucking... Everything's high strung today.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Yeah, people love short-term fats, man. There's something about it. If you know there's a bigger guy and you think he's not going to live long, there's an exceptional amount of love that goes into them immediately.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Oh, he looks great. No, John Taylor's an exceptional guy. Great storyteller. He's a fucking, he's the Santa Claus of every 7-Eleven I've ever been to.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
He'll hit a 68 in an ICU, dude. This guy's one of a kind, I feel like. You know? Nobody could do it like him. He's exceptional.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Yeah, don't you want to stay in this hollowed out moose carcass out here in Bend, Oregon? Do you? Don't you want to stay in our tree house?
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
It's just like regular shit. People are like, yeah, we'll go stay there, you know?
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
You ever did a lot of fucking outdoors, or what was your life like?
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Rockford Fosgate's in the trunk just coming down the street.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
There's nothing like running out of gas and coasting to the fucking pump.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Yeah. Oh, that was crazy. Dude, if an older kid picked you up when you were a kid and he had a car, it was like getting into somebody who had a car's car when you couldn't even have a car was the craziest feeling ever.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Whoa. Yeah, hey, play something cool on the radio. Everything meant something.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Dude, yeah, I mean, the whole thing's crazy to me. I'm so happy for... My biggest thing was I was so happy for Bobby Kennedy, man. Yeah. Because he's the only person that I super know, like, as a human, you know? Uh-huh. He's been a buddy of mine for years, and I've just known that he's a... I trust him. It's almost like you have people that you know and that are good people.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Yeah, and it mattered if your hand was out the window, the window was down, if the window was up, how you were operating, if the seatbelt was on, if your arms were over this. You want to look cool. Yes, you want to look cool.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
And you thought everybody you drove past looked at you. What's up, kids?
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
What's up, kids? Just looking for some pussy. I remember there was this one dude.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Yeah. God, I fucking remember that shit, dude. I remember my brother one time fucking... I got more of the story. Sorry, go on.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
I hate that kind of thing. Have you ever had like a bag stuck under your car or whatever?
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Oh, totally. Everything felt like kind of had the Stephen King vibes back then, you know?
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
I have to trust my own instincts at some point and know I know him. He's somebody I would vouch for. He's a good guy and he's been helpful to me in moments where I have struggled as a person and just... been inspirational to me. You know, it's like, I know him, you know, like a friend.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
People were, yeah, some people got dangerous, dude. Especially if they got on the drugs or got on the gear, you know?
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Imagine even being in the other room while that's going on.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
You know, even trying to watch a show or whatever. Or just like...
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
I would never be able to torture somebody, I don't think. I'm trying to think of the things I could do to somebody.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
And do you think it's a choice they make or you think it's something that's just inside of them?
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
And it also seems like there's a lot of cases now where people are deceasing their own children.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
And so, so that's, I think like, that was something I was like super excited about just to see where everybody was like, screw this guy, you know, and to see him have a arc where it's like, cause all he ever cared about to me. And I don't know, this is just my opinions, dude. Some people, everybody has their own opinions and I'm an idiot, but
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Yeah, shut it down. Shut down everything that doesn't have to do with us, I feel like, for a while. It's like there's just a lot of stuff that we haven't even healed from in this country, you know? Oh, yeah. That's the biggest thing. I think there's a lot of things that we haven't healed from that we should try to address as a group, you know?
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
And that could be like everything from Native American times, slavery times, opioid epidemic. There's tons of things I feel like that it's like – and I don't know how you do that. I mean I know time has a lot to do with it, but it's like I just don't know if sending our resources elsewhere is the most important thing right now when it's like we could – I think try at least to help.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Yeah, it's like even if you look at like, um, you know, recently I learned, sorry, recently I learned that like the number one cause of medical debt is insurance is medical debt is the number one cause of bankruptcy in America, right?
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
It's crazy that there's just such a laundering system that goes on. It's money laundering.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
But he always cared about the rivers and the environment. And then he started to care about the environment inside of our bodies. So for me, that all makes sense.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
You don't have insurance like wolf But it's just a scam like the prices for our drugs are so much more than other countries just things that it's like our Government doesn't want to make better deals because there is this middleman that's making a lot of money off of it You know
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Yeah, it's like, do you have two legs? You ever been on a bicycle? Like, the things are just crazy, you know? Do your feet itch? Yeah. You ever had oatmeal raising cookies? And you're like, well, fucking this is me, I think.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
And people would get unaddicted quick. You're really just getting people addicted to things. I don't even understand. And how about we prosecute that fucking Sackler family that fucking killed hundreds of thousands of people in our country? How about that? How about that? How about that?
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
This family is mass murderers. Anybody with the last name, they should kick that gene pool out of our fucking country. Those people are fucking murderers, dude. I think a lot of people still haven't gotten over that shit.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Heartless fucking lizards. Get those motherfuckers out of here. And that's one thing. That was one of the reasons why I was supportive of Vance. I just believe he has a soft spot for that type of thing, and I hope that it'll get... I don't know if he can do anything because lobbies are so big now.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
I just, that shit, like, even thinking about it, bro, it makes me so angry.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2226 - Theo Von
Well, one of the problems is that say if you work for a politician in D.C., they can only pay you so much money by law to work with them and help put their bills together. So at a certain point, the lobbyists can pay more to those same people who have been writing bills. For the congressmen and for the senators. So they then go to work as lobbyists. That's one of the biggest problems.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
became prominent during the mid-19th century, primarily due to the Industrial Revolution, which led to large population shifts towards urban areas and the development of suburban communities accessible by newly established rail systems, allowing people to live further from their workplace and commute into work regularly.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
The term commute itself originates from this era of early rail travel, where people paid a commuted fare for regular travel to the city. Oh, wow. So I guess if you were like a person that came every day for their job into like, rural New York into the New York City, then you paid a commuted fare.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
Yeah, I think that that's fair. But then I guess what if you have a place, you finally call home, you love it, and then somebody next door builds like a neon light shop or something. Yeah. And they put billboards up in their yard. Like that kind of thing I feel like would lead to war.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
Yeah, I guess sometimes you don't know what a city's overall strategies are, too. It's like sometimes just as a regular citizen, even though you may think that we do, maybe we wouldn't know sometimes what their overall strategies are.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
The largest rent decrease? Why? Because of extra housing.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
Yeah. Yeah. Oh, well, one of the worst things that happens in a lot of places is the artists and stuff for the first have to leave an area because they're the ones who can't afford to live there anymore. You know, I think that happens in a lot of cities where, you know, rent price start to go up.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
And then the guy who's like just doing his best to make ends meet, who plays a saxophone or, you know, who runs an art studio, they can't afford to keep their, you know, they're kind of the first to go a lot of times.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
So gentrification is the process whereby characters of a poor urban area is changed by wealthier people moving in, improving housing and attracting new businesses, typically displacing current inhabitants of the process. Right. So they're kind of you lose a lot of culture. Yeah. Because you.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
Yeah, you lose a lot of authenticity there too. You lose people who know the lore of the neighborhood. And then everything just starts to be a Panera Bread too, which really starts to suck.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
Oh, wow. Yeah, so no matter what side of the bed you wake up on, you're going to draw a weapon probably. That's right, yeah. That's wild. Native American? Yeah, like 25%. Oh, that's great. That's a good amount.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
That's one thing that starts to happen in a lot of places is you just run a lot of the same. And a lot of cities start to look the same. Yes. And then you don't have any there's no reason to even go to another city. Like, why do I want to go there if it's just going to be another restaurant that's just next door to me?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
Yeah, Nashville's ruined. They have a great area there called 12 South and it has all these like great little shops and stores. And then now it's just been, it has like a ragging, but just like it had like quaint vibes. You could walk down. It just felt like you were in like a neat pocket.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
And then now it just feels like you can barely tell the difference between there and if you're walking down like South Congress in a way. Yeah. So you're still in Nashville. You ever going to move to Austin? I might. I'm thinking about it. You know, I'm thinking about if I could afford to get a home here and keep a home here, you know. Oh, you could.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
Then I would be able to go back and forth, you know.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
This show is sponsored by Liquid IV. If I sound pretty juicy, that's because it's, shoot, I'm liquidated right now. I've had a couple packets today, probably three, four packets. Woke up in the middle of the night, had me a packet Liquid IV. I like using it. I use it often. I don't really care about the flavors, to be honest with you. There's a green grape flavor.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
That I've been using in some type of strawberry deal I've been using. I'll get me a water. Pour out a little bit of the water. One and a half sips. And then I empty in that packet of liquid IV. Get it down in there. Put the lid on. Shake it up, baby. Liquid IV, it's more than just a drink. It's a science, you know. You make your formula. So go ahead and break the mold and own your ritual.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
Oh, enough, too, to fucking know how to make a good fry bread, too, I bet. Yeah. I noticed that... So you're kind of this financial guy... Um, our financial liaison even, uh, to like Gen Z or millennials. I mean, it could be anyone, but I feel like that's kind of like, um, it seems to me like that's kind of like the world that you work with.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
So just to kind of circle back into where we were. So one of the major things you're saying that Gen Z faces is?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
That's the first thing my mom said. She's like, okay, you're going to get a car to get to work to pay for your car. Yeah. And it really was the truth kind of. It really is. But also having that freedom was great, you know?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
Oh, yeah. They won't even let you take a scooter or a lime on the interstate. Yeah. You know, which is crazy. Like there might be one state allows it. What state allows scooters on the interstate? Can you bring that up?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
It might be New Hampshire or something. They don't give a fuck. As long as you're an organ donor, they'll let you fucking do whatever you want, bro. As long as you are donating plant-based organs back to society.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
So when I was a kid, they had – you felt like you had to have a job, right? And my mom or my – I was raised by my mom. She always had a job. She had a job like – I don't think she only had like – She just, it was always work, you know, and parents would have been ashamed if they didn't have a job. Do, do the younger generations feel that same way?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
Like people that you're talking to, do they have that same feeling about work?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
Like, what are you saying? Like that was just like, they can't even do that. Right. You're saying like, no, it's just, it's, it's thinking that, Oh, I see.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
Students charged after mob beats up falsely accused child predator. And that's in Worcester. Oh, I'm sorry. I know this place. Worcester, Mass. Five students from Assumption University in Worcester are facing charges of kidnapping and assaulting a man for a TikTok inspired to catch a predator. Police are saying that the man did nothing wrong. As court documents state, the man went to meet a woman.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
who was listed as 18 years old online. So what are we saying here? Are we saying the school would not say what disciplinary action, if any, may take? First of all, the math department should take action against these fucking predators. Because you have to at least be... A predator? Yes. You can't just, I mean, it's so hard to meet people now.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
And this guy finally comes out of his house to meet somebody and he gets jumped.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
Oh, I see. You're saying so that you think part of that was this.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
And you're helping people with their finances. Like what kind of qualified you to become sort of this person who's offering suggestions to others?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
It's so funny you say that. I saw something like this. I love where you're at, man, because even some of the things you're saying, it's like things that I couldn't – you're just at this really unique intersection, I think. Yeah. I just wanted to say that I'm just realizing that more as I talk to you. But yeah, I'll see things.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
It's like, yeah, the fires are really bad, but realizing that it's been 11 days since your boyfriend texted you back. Right. And you're like, and someone will be walking down the street with flames in the back, but they're making it about them and their boyfriend or something, you know, or hope my door dashers. Okay. It looks dangerous out here today.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
And there'll be from their balcony looking for their taco order. And there's buildings on fire.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
And also, leave and go rescue yourself. You're going to risk it all for some raviolis? Yeah. It's almost like people don't even feel like they're going to die. It's almost like... Before I go off on too much of a tangent, whose fault do you think that is that there's some of that mentality, right? Is it the parents or is it just society? Where are you finding the fault of that?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
Thumb raped or knuckle raped. Shit like stuff like that. You're like, that's... What, are you going to do a swab kit now on my hand, you know?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
Right. So now they're, oh, if somebody gets views off of victimhood.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
Oh, for sure. Well, I think you saw I saw this with Mark Zuckerberg the other day. He was on Joe Rogan's show and he was talking about bring up some of the clips. He was talking about how. Mark Zuckerberg tells Joe Rogan podcast, Biden administration tried to censor memes in surprise episode.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
And I, first of all, I believe you will probably see things like that. Cause it's a lot, how the drug, how drug companies work. Right. Um, But I think this is exactly what he's doing. He's because they had like, there was, they admitted before to like, um, only putting certain stuff up during like, um, deciding them deciding what it was misinformation or not. Right.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
Which, which is just, it's a, it's, it's awkward for a platform to decide, right. Kind of like, unless something is, you know, um, sexual violence, things like that. I don't think that should be on, you know, but for them to decide, um, For them to decide what was misinformation. But I feel like that's what he's doing here now. He's playing the victim here.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
He's trying to say... Oh, I see what you're saying. That, oh, we didn't... They were telling us to do stuff instead of him saying we were doing these things.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
swearing yes oh no not swearing right oh no right he's just trying to say oh we were we were a victim of all this and you're almost playing now you're pointing fingers at a sinking ship since the biden is first of all um you know he's he's not it's not fair to communicate with him i don't think and probably hasn't been for a bit because he's just not mentally well right um and no judgment against his party or but just to me i've always felt like they were taking advantage of a senior citizen right like if that were my father or grandfather i'd be kind of upset
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
you know, that people are marching him out every day because he believes what you're telling him, right? He believes that he's fully capable and competent, right? But yeah, in this instance, that's exactly, you say that there's creators doing that. I think this is one of the biggest creators doing exactly what you're saying.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
We have added a second show in Nashville, baby, on May 3rd. It's an early show, 4 p.m. at the Bridgestone Arena. And I can't even believe that. And thank you guys so much for all the love and support. And I'm honored to be performing here in Nashville. We also have tickets remaining for East Lansing, Michigan, Victoria, B.C.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
Right. But she kind of low key does have a boss if she's listening to her therapist, because then the therapist is like, well, you're going to pay me. And you almost become an employee of your therapist in some ways. I'm not saying that's exactly what happened, but sometimes that will happen to people.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
And then, yeah, people are like, I can't lift anything heavy because like in a past life, I was a weightlifter or something who was injured. And you're like, well, fucking we got to get the boxes on the shelves.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
Yeah. Well, a lot of times you'll pay and then you'll – but that kind of becomes like an emotional race card in a way sometimes where people are like, yeah, my therapist said that.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
Right, yeah. I mean, I feel like you kind of have this like Jerry Springer meets finances kind of energy, you know, which is – it's awesome.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
Right. You can't just be funding lesbianism if you don't want to be. Yeah. It's like you can support it, but if your wife leaves you, you shouldn't still have to be the guy funding it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
What do you think is the number one thing that's preventing... Gen Zers from working? Or do you think we already talked about that? Let me see where we're at right now.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
Really? Yeah. Oh, I didn't even know that. Yeah. Oh, that's great, man. Yeah, it's super fascinating. But like – so what was your financial problem? Just so I know, like where did you start where you're like, oh, okay, I'm in a bad spot?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
Yeah. The more you have that, the more that that mentality is accepted and nurtured and becomes like a habit, then surely the further you are from, if you're not even taking care of your responsibilities or, you know, hitting like a bottom line or breaking even, um, then yeah, you're certainly not going to be investing. Exactly. Do you see that nepotism is an issue?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
Cause you know, there's a lot of like, there was always this idea of like Reaganomics where like the top so percent will have the money and there'll be this trickle down. Right.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
yeah but that's never really kind of happened it felt like right um do you it's interesting yeah do you think nepotism um just how big of an issue is nepotism do you feel like you hear a lot like you hear a lot about these days about like nepa babies right yeah i just wonder if if you if you hear a lot about that in like the financial world like oh you're just like a um trust fund baby or something like that you know
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
Oh yeah. I was talking a little boosty one time. Um, he's a rapper if you're not familiar with him. And he was talking about how like the hardest thing to teach is your hustle to your children, right? Like your same energy for, um, like if you didn't have certain things growing up, he's like, it is so hard to transfer that energy to your children.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
At the same time, want to give them just, you know, the basic needs even, you know, and the basic needs sometimes will be fancier because they're, you have more money to spend. Um, Take me through a couple of examples, if you can, Caleb, of like Gen Zers or millennials and some of the issues, like just specific things that they showed up with on your show.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
Because it's so entertaining. Like this is one thing that's so great. It's like, it really is. It's just like, yeah, it's a financial Jerry Springer. And it's so funny that you had already coined that term for you guys selves.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
Yeah. And I think it's almost you. I can almost see this happening where we will get to like to catch a predator videos of like you pulling up on somebody or not even you just the way society is. Right. Because you're kind of at this perfect section of like capitalism and like voyeurism. Right. Okay. Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
Well, I could see there almost being like a to catch a predator of somebody like buying something that they can't afford and you pull up on them on the spot. You know, it's almost like you're catching them in a transaction. Yeah. And it's like, you know, you can't afford this, man. What are you doing? You know, chop up their credit card on the spot. Yeah, totally.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
Like, I just I feel like that that's where we're headed. You know, some people could use it for sure. Yeah. Oh, for sure. There's someone walking around a mall right now that should not be in there that is pretending... You know, to probably has empty bags in their hands that weights in them. Yeah. Some very lightweight or old clothes.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
And it's just pretending this illusion of like living in some fantasy, you know?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
Yeah. He kind of has that autism billionaire vibe, you know? Yeah. Which I think is like kind of the new a lot of billionaires are autistic now. You know, it's like the new thing, you know? So who knows what they're going to do, some of them. He looks like he doesn't even eat or anything. Could you imagine him eating a meal? I couldn't. Yeah, so he's gaining, man. He's getting those gains. I know.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
I'm not saying he's not healthy or something. I just think he gives off a computer energy to me sometimes.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
And he's in whiteface there, so obviously they were reprogramming him or something. They had to put his face in the shop for a week or something. No, certainly an amazing creator, but I do think there's this very strong link between autism and – technological advancement that I think we'll figure out in the future.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
I barely beat it, dude. You know, and they said it was very close in our area. Can you take me through a couple of examples?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
Just so my listeners can know like some of the stuff that's on your show, right? Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
And what is it? It's not like on like, is it like lessons to talk like characters? Like how far, like what are they getting into?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
Oh, I see. So something as simple as your birthday, they can go 20 grand in a day. Yeah. Right. The whole month. Let's see this right here, and this is some of it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
Oh, if I hear one more thing about lesbians and their nephew, you know?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
So, yeah, it's like, you would think especially, you can find deals nowadays where they probably could have got some free food vouchers or something like that. Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
And what does that give them? I think strippers and lesbians love Disneyland, right? I noticed that. Lesbians also love this. It's our nephew's birthday, right? Because for a lot of lesbians, it's probably as close as they will get to having a child, right? Just because of science, math, or whatever. And nowadays that's changing some, but for a long time,
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
a lot of lesbians are like, we got to get our, you know, our nephew, you know, it was like the, that's like the biggest, craziest thing, you know? So there's a lot of nephew obsession. Yeah. in the lesbian community as well, you know? Yeah. But that's a lot of money on Disney. Yeah, it is. And not much return. You get a return, but you're an adult also.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
Yeah, they need to have a Disney. Now, I wish Disney had a hostel or kind of like a Section 8 area. Yeah, they should. Because that would be very magical if you ended up in the trenches.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
Or just spray-painted some wild shit on it. I think that could be kind of interesting. Yeah. Okay, so you're talking to people that are wasting too much money. Usually. Lots of debt. Okay, a lot of debt. What are some other ones that you're seeing?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
Okay. So he's not, he did, he didn't get the, um, fluid pass or whatever.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
Yeah. Well, strippers is that age old kind of bait and switch. It's the illusion, you know, that's why they always catch men like masturbating in their cars outside of strip clubs because they're, you know, they've built up this whole illusion, um, That's a lot of money to spend on stripping. Now I do, I respect the fact that he was going without eating though. Yeah, he was giving it up.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
Because a lot of people were just like, yeah, I'm going to snack and whatever and still waste this money.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
Visiting strippers and stuff. I guess, that's how they made it through. Dieting and visiting strippers, yeah. I could see that. There was another one you had. What was the one? Bring up one of the ones that we had pulled up.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
the guy in the red suit was an interesting guy oh yeah i took the loan out to fund my emergency fund where is this emergency fund okay i saw about a thousand stop it real quick so this guy took a loan out to fund his emergency fund yeah like 20 interest too by the way dropped from 2500 uh i spent some of it
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
Okay. So let's stop it there. So this is the kind of stuff that you're running into.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
And this is a young man. He took money out at 28.64% interest to learn hair extension lessons. And that was considered an emergency.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
Do you see a lot of that? I'm going to fly away to another country. That seems like a very fairytale type of energy.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
And what does cope talk mean when you use that term?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
So a lot of people trying to, it seems like, deflect the reality of the world. Yeah. What can I do? What class can I take? What school can I stay in longer? What can I do to not have to face the fact every day that I have to be the one to survive myself?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
Yeah, because then also after you have a piece of reality that's really like a moment, like these are real moments with people who have made some mistakes or we've all been there. I mean, I remember I had a cell phone. I was like, I'm not paying Verizon. They don't know me. That was my thought. These fuckers don't know me, right? And I was on a bicycle at the time.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
You know, I was on my bike, on the cell phone, you know, just eating up minutes or whatever, just running up a tab. And I was like, these motherfuckers don't know who I am. You know what I'm saying? I like to see them come get this fucking money, right? And my friend's house who I was living at, his dad was like, get fucked, pay the shit. You know?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
And then I think that's when it started hitting me like, oh shit. It hit my credit, right? I didn't even know I had credit. I didn't even know I had credit until they called like, hey, your credit's bad. I'm like, what is it? And they're like, your credit? And I was like, yeah. Put him on. And they're like, no, your credit's bad. And they're like, you owe $1,100 to Verizon.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
I thought you could just run away from it. You can't. But that was like kind of a bottom for me. I was like, oh, shit is really real, right? So I think moments like this are really real to people. And then you have a gentleman here. who seems to be kind of fluid, sexually fluid. I'll say maybe I have no idea.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
He's dressing up like he kind of has the look of, he's like the arch nemesis of like the monopoly guy or whatever. Right. Or kind of like a Christmas sort of like a, like kind of like a, um, Carmen San Diego.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
Yes, like, hey, kind of like Carl San Diego, right? Yeah. So I feel like he has this – and it's a good energy. So obviously he's brave to do – to have his own vibe, right? You can tell that, right? Confident. Confident. He's a business owner, this guy. He is? Wow. Wannabe business owner. Wannabe business owner. But then he also has this emergency fund.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
And I think a lot of people sometimes when they – They'll create an emergency fund. A lot of fluid people would be very like, you know, like, oh, you're this jacket doesn't fit. It's an emergency. You know, emergencies can be very it's like, is that a real emergency type of thing?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
Right. That's a great point. Yeah, I was always kind of amazed that they didn't teach us in school. Like if you didn't have a strategy, like they would have people come for lunch. Like parents would come or people with like people in our community that had jobs would come and talk to us, but they never had like people that had really fucked up. You know, they never had like a crack at it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
what do you see a lot of is there a lot of flexing still like i know that's a thing where people like i'm going to appear this way absolutely is that a big thing you're seeing still with like millennials and gen z is like the appearance of things or some people more go into like the emo hole of like i don't have anything i have nothing i live in a chipotle deep inside of a chipotle type of vibe
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
Hats like that, those hats are kind of costly, I know.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
Because you're not living in your own reality then. It's like... Yeah, I think that was a blessing about having a shitty car when I was a kid. I earned the money. I bought the car. It was a piece of shit. Someone stole the passenger seat. But I drove it, you know. People would get in and just had to get in immediately into the back seat. Yeah. You know, but it was like I drove, but it was...
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
Come and talk to the class for 20 minutes and be like, this is how this happened. Right. Or they never had anybody that was selling leg or selling pants.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
That's code Theo50off at factormeals.com slash Theo50off to get 50% off plus free shipping on your first box. This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. BetterHelp. It's therapy. That's what it is. I'll tell you point blank. Sometimes you want to get therapy. Something's going on. I've had friends that have needed help and not gotten it. And it's scary. Life can be that way.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
I'm not trying to scare you. I'm just trying to just make sure you're aware. You know, sometimes we can be dealing with stuff and we don't even notice it, you know? So I just want you to make sure you're taking care of yourself. And if you're afraid to try therapy one-on-one in person, then BetterHelp, they can help. That's right.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
cooter or whatever on the street tell you know like hey this is how things fell apart like they never had that other side of somebody who was like in a second bankruptcy or somebody who'd been abused in a marriage you know it's like you never really got you always just got the like i'm a fireman you know and it'd be like and the kids would be like awesome you know and the guy would let you play with his axe or whatever it was like but you never got like the other side of it it's kind of crazy that they don't have that um
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
And if you've been struggling, man, we've all been there. Or woman, we've all been there. And this too shall pass. Are there a lot of get-rich-now type of energy out there? Oh, yes. Is there?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
What do you think? What is some of that? That's crazy. Yeah, what is some of that get-rich-now energy? So many pyramid schemes. What is that?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
Okay, so hold on. You get 10 baby ball pythons, and then you pay somebody, you get the 10 baby ball pythons. Okay. And now what do I do with these baby ball pythons? How do I get pyramided in?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
I think you'd have to mate them and then sell 10 to somebody else.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
There's a market app for day trading ball python. So not only has somebody created a pyramid scheme of ball pythoning, right? So you're ball pythoning, you're selling a few grams of ball python here, an eight ball python here. And then you, but then the whole time somebody's also, whoever engineered this fucking thing. Also created an app where there's like almost a ball python coin market.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
So that's going up and down as well. Yeah. You're basically driving around town with a backseat full of ball pythons waiting for the market to go up enough. Yeah. So you can pull over and put a couple ball pythons on somebody's tab.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
I know, huh? Where's she been at? She went to bed. Somebody said she went to Barbados or something and she moved out of the country. Okay. So that's a new thing that's going on. Apparently. What's another one that's going on? Any other pyramid schemes?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
just in like kind of elementary education, you know?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
Okay. Say if you have debt, right? Yeah. And you could save $5 every week. What's the debt? You could save, say you have, say you're $10,000 in debt. Okay. And you're 25 years old.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
And you could save $20 a week, right? Would you rather that you put that $20 a week towards paying off the debt or is it better to take that 20 and put it towards just like a long-term investment?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
That's a good point. I would say the interest rate of the debt is probably going to be about 14% or something.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
Because there's this mentality I think sometimes like, oh, I'm not going to pay off that credit card. I'm going to save this money and invest. You know what I'm saying? Like I'm going to invest in it instead. But you're really just reverse engineering a nightmare kind of.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
Is college still considered a normal path for a lot of Gen Z students?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
A lot of diversity, too, at those colleges. You want to meet some, you know what I'm saying, an Asian girl or guy or something. Yeah. Do it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
I see. And if you're going to drop out, then you're dropping out there at a cheaper. Sure. At a cheaper rate.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
Right. Yeah. You want to have a you want to have some interest in what you're doing for sure. And you want to find something. I mean, that's one nice thing. Sounds about going to a community college or going to a college is taking on some different courses and seeing like, well, what might I be interested in? You know, you know, I know I like something about this, but I don't know what it is yet.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
Let me get at least into that realm of classes. Absolutely.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
Wow, really? Yeah. Yeah, it took me I think 11 years or something or 10 and a half or 10 and –
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
six fifths five six years almost yeah like 11 years i think to do college yeah it happens and it costs money dude i took a couple classes like you already took this class and all those i remember being like yeah i know i'm good at it i'm gonna fucking take it again really yeah okay doubling up the degree yeah and just like and i remember one time this teacher gave me a b i went and took her class again to fucking prove to her i could get an a did you prove to her
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
I think she got laid off. She was dealing with like addiction, pill addiction. But I I did a good you know, I did my best. That's for sure. What are what are some things say somebody's they don't know what they're doing right now. Right. They don't know. What are some, let's go over some like blue collar and the non blue collar jobs that people could do. You could start at home.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
I've always said pressure washing. I grew up in a neighborhood where if you wanted to get a leg up, you could get a pressure washer, a couple hundred dollars. Sure. You can get a nice one for like five, 600 bucks. Now you have to get that money first, but. Yes, it's realistic.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
And then you can start pressure where you can go to a wealthy person's area and be like, hey, I'll pressure and you can do a good job. What are some other jobs like that that you recommend to people to get started if they don't really have anything?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
Summer Moon, it's called? Yeah. I just went to a place called Two Hands. Okay, also good, I think. Yeah, they have nice people that work there.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
That is a huge trap, isn't it? Yeah. Yeah. I'm going to look the part so much, but you still have to do the part.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
I remember when I first moved to Los Angeles, we put up flyers everywhere. We would do refrigerator cleaning, right? Nobody wants to clean their refrigerator. Yeah. And for 200 bucks, we'd come and clean your refrigerator. And we'd just take everything, just clean. I mean, clean it good. Yeah. And bro, I was shocked at how many people were like, I will, in a heartbeat, come clean this bitch.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
A lot of perverts too, trying to fucking touch your back or whatever while you were cleaning.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
But you fucking chalk it up to the 200. Yeah. Have somebody on watch while you clean back and forth.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
But dog walking, that was another thing, something you could do. Oh, it's great. Car cleaning. I remember if you liked cleaning cars, you like cleaning your car. If you do something well, somebody will pay you to do that well for them, right? That's one thing that I always think.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
And the funny thing is, man, I'll say this. Once you start doing something, you don't know where it's going to lead. I will be so shocked how many times it's like, Okay, you're a barista, you become a good barista. Then somebody who runs a company of some sort, they show up, they see a good worker when they see one. They're like, what are you making here? Are you making $18 an hour plus tips?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
I'll pay you $80,000 a year to come work right next door. Why don't you come in tomorrow and we can just talk about it, see if it's something you would like. Just because they see your work ethic. It's amazing sometimes when somebody who runs a business starts to see good work ethic, they will latch onto it immediately.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
But also the things you don't know. It's like you start with a small thing and the next thing you know, it's like like my brother was a tree cutter. Right. He started just cutting down trees. And after a couple of months, he was like, oh, wait, I could be the foreman. I understand how this works and I can do the foreman's job. Right. I need to learn more.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
But once I learn more, I'd be happy to hire some other tree guys and put up my own advertising like the barrier to entry to things. It's not as bad.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
And I have a friend who's been doing some personal assistanting for another friend. And I was like, bro, you should start learning social media edits, learn how to do them. So then whenever you're with this guy, now you could, you know, just capture a couple things on your phone, put it through one of these kind of like different filters or different programs that they have online.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
in the Canada, College Station, Texas, Gigum, Belton, Texas, Oxford, Mississippi, Tuscaloosa, Alabama, Winnipeg in the Canada, and Calgary in the Canada. Get all your tickets at theovon.com slash T-O-U-R. Today's guest is a financial advisor for Generations Z and Millennials. He's a YouTuber, he's a businessman, and he's based in Austin, Texas, which is where we're taping today.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
You know, there's Capcom, there's all these different things. And next, you know, you can show him three examples the next day. And now the next time he hires you to go out with him for an event or whatever it is, you know, you can tack on an extra 30 bucks an hour because you're going to make a sick edit for him. There's a lot of things that you can do.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
I think that's kind of an easy one you can learn is how to become a social media editor or video editor. Now you're gonna have to have a computer that works to do it. And you're gonna have to have at least your cell phone to be able to do that. But I think that that's realistic. Trying to think of what else? Oh, carpet cleaning is something that people don't wanna do a lot of times.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
Yeah, I agree. I'm trying to get some other ones work from home that aren't as blue collar. I know there's data entry is one. I see a lot of advertising for data entry. Is that a valid one? It could.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
Yeah. Yeah. Look that up. Is data entry a valid gateway job or something?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
Yeah. According to current data and entry-level data, entry position typically pays around $15 and $20 per hour in the U.S. with an average annual salary ranging from $30,000 to $40,000.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
You may need to do it for a couple months to get out of a situation, you know? Yeah. Maybe you could do it while your kid's at school. You know what I'm saying? I'm just trying to think of little ways. I know that these are obviously me saying these things, and I have no idea what some of people's real lives are like. No, of course.
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E556 Caleb Hammer
Have you ever had somebody come in with a business idea that was just...
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
Biofrequency gadgets are a total scam. Let's zoom in on this, see if this sounds like it. I would like to find this so we can put this out. This is interesting. I recently asked what I thought about the Solex AO Scan. This website for the product includes this claim.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
AO Scan technology by Solex is an elegant yet simple way to use frequency technology based on Tesla, Einstein, and other prominent scientists' discoveries. It uses delicate biofrequencies and electromagnetic signals to communicate with the body. Was it something like that or no? It had nutrients involved, you said?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
Got it. So first there's going to be a place where people are going to get this scan done. And then based on the outcomes of the scan, you're going to be able to sell them nutrients to get them equal. Exactly. Get them whole. Wow. Man, it's crazy the level of people. We had a glitter mining thing by us growing up.
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E556 Caleb Hammer
People sold these glitter, like you could buy shares at glitter mines or whatever, where they were mining glitter. And they fucking robbed so many of us. Oh, yeah. I was in a pyramid scheme too. I put, I lost something. What'd you sell? Just, it was like, you basically sold somebody right into a pyramid. Like I got into an, it was the, on the chart, it was a pyramid. Yeah.
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E556 Caleb Hammer
And it was like, well, I remember asking somebody like, is this a pyramid scheme? And they're like, I don't know. You remember what you're selling? Just you sold literally the square that you had. It was like, oh, I'm going to sell. Somebody sold me a square. And then I was like, OK, now I get two squares. I get to sell two squares. It was a it was that is like a literal. OK, yeah.
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E556 Caleb Hammer
And do the crazy part was I remember asking my friend's dad about it and he had bought into it, too. So everybody got took by us.
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You do? Yes, absolutely. I'll tell you a story. I was in West Virginia. I was doing a show there one weekend. And they had the grand sellers of the Mary Kay group and they all had Cadillacs or whatever. And they were doing a big thing there and they all pulled up. I mean, they must have had 40 different Cadillacs that they pulled up.
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E556 Caleb Hammer
Is that one of the things you see with the younger generation is just because of TikTok, there's so many more schemes out there.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
Yeah. I know there were some different inventions or schemes. There was one called Dynaformer. D-Y-N-A. It was a bike wheel. This thing was crazy. Dyna bike wheel. This was it. Pull up this DynaSphere. DynaSphere vehicle. Zoom in. The Dynasphere is a monowheel vehicle designed, patented in 1930 by John Archibald Purvez from Somerset, UK.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
Purvez's idea for the vehicle was inspired by a sketch made by Leonardo da Vinci. Look at this thing. Two prototypes were initially built, a smaller electric model and one with a gasoline motor engine. Let me see the driver's seat and the motor were part of one unit mounted with wheels upon the interior rails of the outer hoop. I mean, this thing looks crazy.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
If you can, you can't see this, um, on audio, but it's basically a guy driving a huge tire around. Um, The singular driving seat and motor unit when powered forward would thus try to climb up the spherical rails, which would cause the lattice cage to roll forward. So basically you're in a fair. It's like something you'd be in a carnival.
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E556 Caleb Hammer
Yeah. Okay. So you started to put your money back together. Like you started, I mean, did you pay off some of those things? Did you get rid of the car? You said you dropped out of school. So I'm assuming that you just realized it wasn't for you or.
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E556 Caleb Hammer
Steering of the prototype was crude, requiring the driver to lean in the direction sought to travel. Though Purvez envisioned future models equipped with gears that would shift the inner housing without leaning, thus tipping the Dinosphere in the direction of travel. A novelty model was later constructed by Purvez that could seat eight passengers. The Dinosphere 8, made specifically for beach use.
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E556 Caleb Hammer
It looks like a beach toy. It's basically like a hamster wheel. If you guys could imagine a hamster wheel that someone drove. Oh, there you go. There's that eight-seater. Oh, that's kind of cool. You get to sit in a circle and it just cruises. That's romantic. Yeah. Okay, go back. I just want to see what happened to it. It was also impossible to steer or brake.
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E556 Caleb Hammer
Another aspect of the vehicle that received... While the vehicle could move along just fine, it was also impossible to steer brake. Another aspect of the vehicle that received criticism was the phenomenon of gerbling, the tendency when accelerating or braking the vehicle for the independent housing holding the driver within the monowheel to spin within the moving structure.
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E556 Caleb Hammer
Imagine you slam on the brakes, right? The vehicle stops, but you just keep spinning in the middle. We need Elon to get on this. Bring it back. Yeah, that's something we need back. What else did I'm trying to think of? Oh, the banana slicer. Can you see if you find that one? This was something that somebody invented. The problem was, no, go to that one right there on the right.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
Hutzler, go to the Hutzler right there. It was a one size fits all. Your banana had to be one size.
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E556 Caleb Hammer
So if your banana was obtuse or if it was like, I don't want to say an African banana or whatever, but if it was a different type of banana or Filipino banana, I don't think this, you couldn't use this one. But that's crazy to think about, right? Yeah. That somebody invented that. That was kind of a crazy one. I'm trying to think of anything else I remember hearing about. Yeah.
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E556 Caleb Hammer
Oh, there's always that baby cage. People would put that baby outside of the window. Remember that? That baby cage out window.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
Yeah, there you go. Right there. Get that little baby out of that cage, baby. The bizarre history of the baby cage. Pull up. Click on that. Get me a link to that, daddy.
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E556 Caleb Hammer
Little Al Switzy, yeah. Little Al Sideswitzy, huh? Okay. Play on words there. Dangling baby cages came into vogue after they were invented in 1922, but their origins really began with the 1884 book, The Care of Feeding of Children. Um, by Emmett Holt Emmett carefully describes how babies need to be aired out. Fresh air is required to renew and purify the blood.
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E556 Caleb Hammer
And this is just as necessary for health and growth as proper food. Um, and what were those cages? How big was that baby cage? Daddy. Oh, that baby's enjoying it, huh? It's got to be kind of nice to put your baby out there for an hour. Let him meet a bird or whatever. Have a falcon fucking befriend him.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
It was believed that exposing infants to cold temperatures both outside and through cold water bathing would grant them a certain immunity to catching minor illnesses. I could see some of that.
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E556 Caleb Hammer
Yeah, that's all this is. Yeah. Yeah, that's the first gold punch right there. That's Wim Hof, I think. That's one of the earliest pictures of Wim Hof right there. That's Joe Rogan right there when he was a baby. Yeah. Tell me a little bit about your own budgeting at Simpler Budget so I can make sure that people know about that.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
Young people who are confused or they don't want to end up in a bad financial realm. Tell me about Simpler Budget.
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E556 Caleb Hammer
OK, you already felt like you'd kind of been able to learn what they were going to teach you over a course of a long time.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
Now, are these classes more valuable than the original classes? So these are real classes. These are valuable classes.
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E556 Caleb Hammer
So day trading in its own right is risky. This is teaching people how to save and budget.
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E556 Caleb Hammer
For sure. It's almost like going to recovery meetings or AA meetings. You go to the meetings just to keep the word in your head. You want to stay motivated. I love the idea that you have this world that's entertaining, but then the back end of the entertainment is let's keep people budgeted and on track.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
It's exactly really what a lot of young generation needs because everything has entertainment value now. It's like you're at a funeral and there's people – like they're selling albums and shit or whatever, like they're, you know, um, but you know, there's, everything has entertainment value now.
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E556 Caleb Hammer
Financier types in the world. And can you... Will you be willing to just give me your take? If I know them, yeah. If you know them. Okay, Grant... We'll pull them up. Okay, Grant Cardone is one.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
Yeah, I think a flexing of wealth is so bizarre to me because I would never want – I would never – if I looked at something somebody else had, I would feel bad if I don't have it, I feel like, or part of me would. Part of me would feel inferior or something, maybe not like – Up here, but somewhere in my head, I'm like, oh, I'm not good enough for some.
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E556 Caleb Hammer
I don't understand sometimes why people do that sort of thing. But I also understand that's just my school of thought and that some people like this aspirational style. Like, you know what I'm saying? Let's see the flash and that motivates some people. So I think there's a motivational tactic in it. Alex Hormazi, you know him?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
Um, Ty Lopez, he's the famous guy that would read a book a day. That shit always was crazy to me.
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E556 Caleb Hammer
We had the book in a day shit was always weird. Like, I don't even know if I want to talk to a guy who just read where the red fern grows. You know what I'm saying? Like, I don't know who I if I want to fucking talk to the guy who just read that in one day.
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E556 Caleb Hammer
Yeah, and having a job is just one of the most important things. I remember my buddy's dad would always just say, do you have a job? It's the first thing he'd ask me every time I saw him, do you have a job? If I had a job, he'd talk to me. If I didn't have a job, he wouldn't talk. It's just like, you need to have a job.
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E556 Caleb Hammer
You need to have something you are doing and not because you need to be part of capital, but because you need to go and do something, right? You have to have a job. It can be, you know, you're making something at home that you're aiming towards selling or doing, but you want to have some motivation. A job is just a form of motivation. It's just an active motivation.
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E556 Caleb Hammer
Oh, I know. I have some women friends that have like spent really got focused on and they've now they want families and stuff. And so now that's a little bit tough for some of them.
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E556 Caleb Hammer
I think fire affects women probably differently because they can have children maybe to, you know, if they focus so much. But even guys like I mean, I focus on work mostly. My biggest relationship is my work. You know, it's like I don't have a relationship right now. I'm not lamenting about it. I would like to get married or something. But when I'm like, who's my spouse? It's my work, you know.
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E556 Caleb Hammer
I put a wedding ring on my job. You know, I like I like working. The second I think about doing something, I think about working, you know. What about Gary Vaynerchuk? He's kind of a wild one, huh?
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E556 Caleb Hammer
gary's always been like the guy he's like oh you got silverware in your house sell it sell it right now you know okay sell your silverware sell your house how much is your house worth three thousand to get out of debt or sell the silverware 65 and then he'll pull up like i'll be standing in a park right because he has nowhere to live now he's eating soup with his hand because he has no more utensils and gary will be like how much money you got the guy's like i got four thousand dollars cash he's like
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E556 Caleb Hammer
Okay, so no, I'm not familiar with what you're talking about. Like stock market. Okay, so you became an investor?
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E556 Caleb Hammer
You fucking did it, buddy. And he'll hug him and then drive off in a limousine. Right. All right. But it's like that's the thing. It's like you just don't want to lose cash sitting around. You know, he's like, oh, your grandmother's asleep. Sell her fucking nightgown while she's resting. She don't need it. You know, it's like anything, anything they have. Lease it out.
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E556 Caleb Hammer
Your grandfather's taking a nap. Lease out his eyeglasses while he's resting. You know, it's just all type of stuff like that, man. Do you know the purpose though? I'm so curious. Cause I do not know this guy. It's a motivation. I feel like, right. And this is just my opinion also, but it's just, it's, it's always, there's always something they want to motivate you to do, you know? Yeah.
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E556 Caleb Hammer
Um, and Varner Chuck, his family owned a wine company growing up. No shade, but it's like, Dude, if my family had a wine company growing up, you know, I remember my mom beat me one time with a bag of fucking frozen oranges. I remember that shit.
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E556 Caleb Hammer
It's a little different than that, but I'm just saying, I'm not sure, but I'm just saying, you know what I'm saying? The Merlot don't fall far from the grape.
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E556 Caleb Hammer
What else are we going to talk about? Ty Dolla Sign. He's not, is he an investor? No, he's just a, what does he do? Um, financial advisor? No. Uh, there isn't much information about Todd, our son's investments. Okay. So I'm not how you ended up on our list then. What else? Anything else on our sheet we wanted to go over? Was there anything else that you wanted to talk about specifically, Caleb?
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E556 Caleb Hammer
Yeah. Yeah. And I think that, I think there's this pressure probably, especially with the younger generation to put, you have to put your life on a social media, right? And so then you would be, you would feel more shame about having certain jobs because you wouldn't want to put that reality on a social media where like when I was in high school or in college, you didn't, that wasn't a thing.
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E556 Caleb Hammer
It was like, you didn't, I mean, social media was coming up, but it wasn't like that. It wasn't like you didn't have, um, You didn't have that immediate reaction with people like ripping you or roasting you or making funny online. So I think that that's a different thing where it's like, oh, man, not what will I think of this job?
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E556 Caleb Hammer
Okay. So the, but the actual product wasn't a good product or it just, you thought it was.
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E556 Caleb Hammer
Man, what will other people think if I post about this job or if I live in this world? And I think that that's where you can just be creative. If you do want to post about your job, be funny about it. Be like, you know what I'm saying? And yeah. And also you have to just realize like, it's the shit that you don't want to be doing.
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E556 Caleb Hammer
That's when you sit there and your brain thinks up the shit you do want to be doing. Yeah. When I was doing shit, I did not want to do, dude. That's when my brain was getting inspired, bro. I mean, my brain was like, and that's when I got to see what my brain even was. My brain was like, we're going to figure this out. My brain started to surprise me with ideas and thoughts.
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E556 Caleb Hammer
And, um, so I think that, um, Yeah, you have to, like, just know that sometimes you feel like, man, I'm in the dirt, but you're really in the soil kind of type of vibe, you know?
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E556 Caleb Hammer
Yeah, and we put it on. It's like, just put the fries in the bag. It's like, sure, but, dude, I used to just put the pizza in the box forever. You know what I'm saying? And it was a blast, dude.
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E556 Caleb Hammer
Oh, really? Yeah. It was great. I've had Jimmy John on this podcast. Yeah. As a business entrepreneur. Big dude. Yeah. Great dude, man. Very big dude. I saw him three weeks ago. Yeah. So it's just like, you just never know where you're going to be, you know? Like, I mean, you just don't, you know, Jimmy John's my favorite sandwich.
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E556 Caleb Hammer
It almost got hit running across the fucking highway to get a couple months.
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E556 Caleb Hammer
Me, I go turkey, Tom, extra turkey, light mayonnaise. Don't look me in the fucking eyes. I'll come in there and get it. Okay.
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E556 Caleb Hammer
Yeah. Nice. And I'll honk my horn for, I'm going to come in. I'll even call them and tell them that I'm like, this is getting a little weird. I'm like, just, I want everybody looking the other way. Leave the sandwich on the counter. It is a very kind of like, it's the closest I get to like robbing a bank or whatever. What was the last thing I was going to ask you?
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E556 Caleb Hammer
Oh, what do you think of an eight-leg parlay as a realistic probability for somebody trying to get a leg up in the world?
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E556 Caleb Hammer
I'm talking about somebody who's got $10 left and they put it on eight football games to all hit for a weekend. Okay. Because this is happening basically in every pie cap a house in America.
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E556 Caleb Hammer
It's getting crazy. I mean, you have people laying in their bed at night fucking, you know, you know, just hopped up on Zins praying for Saquon Barkley. It's getting bizarre.
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E556 Caleb Hammer
Um, what is a good investment? You just said you, you keep things pretty safe for the most part, huh?
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E556 Caleb Hammer
And when you say real estate, what do you mean? Like what type of stuff would you get into?
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E556 Caleb Hammer
Yeah. And over time, it definitely I mean, time goes fast, too. People don't realize it. You know, time goes fast. Yeah. Yeah, people bag on Gen Z a lot. You know, I think there's always that thing where it's like we're bagging on the next generation. But I was looking at a statistic the other day where Gen Z is like the average job. They keep it for two, like two and a half years.
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E556 Caleb Hammer
And it's only six months less than millennials kept their job. Sure. You know, so it's not like Gen Zers can't work or that they're not working. You know, sometimes that's a lot of the energy that's out there.
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E556 Caleb Hammer
Okay, go to that. Generation Z thinks it needs half a million dollars a year to succeed. Wow.
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E556 Caleb Hammer
Half a million dollars. They pay $4,000. Let me see. Armand Darhira Howard and her fiance together earn more than $200,000. A 28-year-old knows that's more money than the vast majority of Americans make, yet the Los Angeles couple still live about half an hour's drive from their pricier neighborhoods where most of their friends live.
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E556 Caleb Hammer
They pay $4,000 a month in rent on top of her $450 student payment, their $400 car payment. and the $200 she sends home to her family in Indonesia.
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E556 Caleb Hammer
So they're saying that they need the zillennial, she's at the cusp of millennial generation and Gen Z, set aside 10% of her income for retirement and has a healthy monthly budget of $500 for entertainment and dining out, which she said comes with a side of guilt as bigger financial goals continually loom.
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E556 Caleb Hammer
In this economy, she said a household income of $500,000 between two people would be very comfortable.
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E556 Caleb Hammer
Yeah, it would be very comfortable. And that's also there, man. That's Los Angeles.
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E556 Caleb Hammer
Yeah, that's one thing that I like about living in a regular place a little bit more is that you start to get a more reasonable idea of things. Yeah, absolutely. You know, I mean, one of the issues is we're all stuck watching these celebrities who are living these insane lives or pretending to also, you know?
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E556 Caleb Hammer
I find Los Angeles in its own, like it has this like, I did like movies and parties and all this shit, but I always found it to be like, it shuts down early. Like, all the bars close early. Everything, it's all for look, right? Everything there was more like, let's make it look this way, right?
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E556 Caleb Hammer
It's a comfortable world, man. I mean, America is a comfortable place. I know it feels uncomfortable a lot of times, certainly in comparison to other people's lives. But yeah, it's like most of us have food. We have clothing. We have a place to sleep. In the world, that is opulence.
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E556 Caleb Hammer
Yeah. Or sometimes that the media is tricking us to by saying, like, this is what we should be talking about, you know?
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E556 Caleb Hammer
But click. Yeah. But I agree. The fact that people are able to that people are bringing that kind of stuff up. I'm trying to think of anything else that I wanted to talk about. Any other any other group that came on your show that was kind of fascinating to you? I would love to play one more clip from your show. What's another one that we have this that we could play?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
Yeah, I just encourage you guys to go if you like, you know, you get a financial take. It's very much it's just it's a perfect microcosm that you're in. And it can be a macrocosm, too. I'm not trying to little it by saying that I'm not the best with words, but I think it's just a perfect like like nucleus that you're in of like entertainment and finances. What's this one right here? Oh, yeah.
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E556 Caleb Hammer
Absolutely. Well, yeah, because you have to see them yourself to answer their calls. And you have to hear the the timbre in your grandmother's voice, you know, knowing that they're concerned about their future because they're missing a little bit of their nest egg.
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E556 Caleb Hammer
It's very scary. I want to go back every day. I want to go back every day. And this person gets a Shakespeare degree. Yeah.
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E556 Caleb Hammer
Yeah. To be broke or not to be broke, dude. That's the question. I feel like – now, unless you're going to go to a renaissance fair and get winked at by the king or something, I feel like that's going to be an uphill climb, dude.
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E556 Caleb Hammer
To go to school. And you stay in this world. Yeah. There is always a person who stays in school. Yeah. And sometimes it gets blamed. I'm like, oh, look at this dude. He can't get his diploma. This girl is an alcoholic and she, you know, goes to, you know, Rutgers or whatever.
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E556 Caleb Hammer
But every now and then there's the opposite of it, of somebody who just stays in because they don't want to get out and face the world.
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E556 Caleb Hammer
Yeah. Cool. Caleb Hammer. I appreciate it so much, man. Thank you so much for just being willing to come and chat with me. I'm excited to see what you guys do. And yeah, I just think it's really, I think it's really neat to have just kind of this corner of entertainment and finances and kind of just basic needs really. you know?
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E556 Caleb Hammer
We all need a basic needs voice. You know, we need that kind of like Jiminy cricket that shows up on your shoulder.
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E556 Caleb Hammer
Yeah. Yeah, for sure. And you're an alarm clock, man. So, um, thank you so much, Caleb hammer. Best of luck, brother.
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E556 Caleb Hammer
Oh yeah. Ultima is definitely, um, a lot of Latinos would drive them. I know. And then my ex-girlfriend drove one. Um, okay. So, so you started to get out of debt. You were got some, you got some money going. You found out that, okay, you realize maybe this could, the direction you were going in at school wasn't for you. It sounded like you started to make some kind of like severe choices, right?
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E556 Caleb Hammer
You may have seen his popular show, Financial Audit, where he takes people to task over their spending habits. I had a great time learning about him and his world. Today's guest is Caleb Hammer. Hello. Caleb Hammer, man. Thanks for catching up, dude. Yeah, what's up, buddy? Nice to meet you. Not much. Yeah, nice to meet you too, man. Hammer. Caleb Hammer. That's a good name. Yeah, it's powerful.
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E556 Caleb Hammer
Okay. And is the product you sell now to people, is that a more helpful product you think than the first one, the other day trading stuff?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
Okay. Yeah. What is, you talk a lot, okay, so I feel like I have a decent understanding now of how you kind of got to where you are, right? Like a lot of it sounds like you're like, okay, college isn't for me, I need to change that. These are the high interest things that I need to, I need to get a job or find a field. You found sales, it's working well for me.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
So, and then I need to find out the specific, the higher interest things I need to get out of those first, the lower interest things I can keep because if I can invest at a slightly higher interest rate. then I'm going to be hypothetically or hopefully paying those off over time, assuming I can make more than the 3% or 4%. Exactly. Okay.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
So now you have a YouTube channel where you kind of talk, it seems like, to a lot of like Gen Z. Is that kind of safe to say, Gen Z millennials? Yeah, Gen Z millennial. Okay. What is the number one thing that they are going into debt over now?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
that they created like this car economy. Can you look up, just see what you find on that?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
Yeah, I think you pretty much just answered it. That's what it seems like a lot of that is. It was like, yeah, people wanted to also live in the suburbs. They didn't want to be in the place, maybe right, you know, in a around a bunch of building stuff. You want to have a yard. You want to have a little bit more space.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
Yeah. And then I think you have a lot of people like if people want to have a yard and want to have an environment they take care of, then they kind of if they take that energy out of the city, then that's not in the city anymore. People want to live in the city now, though.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E556 Caleb Hammer
Yeah. It's a nightmare. Yeah. Kind of like my parents. It was the thing where they wanted to drive into work and drive home. That was part of like the commute, you know, is almost part of their lifestyle. Yeah. You know, I think that was like a big part of the lifestyle then. Let me see. Commuting as we know it today with people regularly traveling significant distance between home and work.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
Right. To actually go into their world a little bit more. Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
Yeah, just a fucking latte. Just, yeah, half caff. Damn, dude. Yeah. I don't know. It's all, it's definitely been mainstream media just got so like, I don't know. The whole thing has been bizarre, man. Being a part of podcasting, you know, all the strange little connections that are out there.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
I mean, like you were saying, Gavin Newsom just started a podcast where he's having people who kind of disagree with him when he had Charlie Kirk on.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
But having a podcast and having people you don't agree with hang out with you for a while is pretty brave.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
I couldn't even think of a thing. I mean, I heard that she roller skated a lot and I wouldn't be curious about that. But it's like, other than that, it's like, I don't know what I would have talked about.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
Congratulations on the child. Thank you, bro. Appreciate that. Congratulations on all your success. Thanks, man. Yeah, I appreciate it, dude. I'm like 17 minutes into your special right now. Oh, cool, cool, cool, cool. Dude, the control you have on stage, that's something I really...
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
You do not get in her fucking way. Uh-uh. Oh, she, yeah, she's definitely, yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
I can't believe that happened. Thank you, dude. Gazunta is good. I did not believe that was going to come up. I just started with Gaza, and then I was like, this won't be funny.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
He's a savage fighter. He's the fisty Charlemagne, baby. I think it's all the same. I think it's all the same.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
I don't know. I think he's latte or whatever they call it. He is. Yeah. but Anthony's incredible. And that little, and that, the daughter looks incredible. I know. She's beautiful. Um, but shout out to Candace. It's so funny how like, uh, shout out to Charlemagne too. I just made, I made a joke one time about him. Um, I said he had, he was handsome. Yeah. He loved that one.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
And, uh, I don't remember what happened with it, but I just thought it was, I think he brought it up.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
I would like to get to meet him. I don't know if I've ever met him. I got to connect you guys, man.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
I bet we probably would. Yeah, of course. Yeah, I saw that they just had, who did they have on there that I love?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
I didn't get into that. I don't get into a lot of the celebrity lore.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
admire like this like um it's almost like a sharpshooter up there kind of like there's something i don't know but you're the way you have this control on stage is something uh it's great thank you man i appreciate that brother Yeah, it's cool, man. How many times did you guys shoot? Twice? We did four shows. Wow. Yeah, two a night. Wow, that venue is so beautiful. It's shot so well. Who shot it?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
What's the same with the politic thing? It's like people see you talking to a politician and now like at your Christmas and family stuff, people are coming up and talking about, asking about politics and shit and foreign protocol or whatever. You're like, what the fuck? You're like, what should we do in Syria, Theo?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
Yeah, people are asking if I was going to be an ambassador to something or whatever. Why would you be an ambassador to – I don't know.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
And they're like, we don't need one of them. Yeah, but we should make a special position. Yeah, but we need – hey, look. I don't know if you've heard some of the slang down there, but we need – We need someone who can communicate. We need an interpreter between the White House and Boosie, OK? Yeah. Because we're fucking, we're losing information.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
Shake it like a doll, baby, do what you do. I'll just be fucking, I'll be breaking down rap lyrics for him.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
No, no, I didn't see it. My mom wouldn't let us watch that kind of stuff. Oh, wow, he does. And so do I a little bit. And so does Alan Dershowitz. So you are involved in politics. You know all these names. You're plugged in, bro. But aren't we plugged in? The funny thing about Candace is they were like, you're an anti-Semite. And she's like, oh, fucking call me whatever you want.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
The dad must be like a... a rifleman or something, or like a... The dad of the babies, right? The dad, yeah, somebody has to be. They're going to hire Anthony Smith now to actually help protect that family. That'd be pretty great, actually. Denzel Washington, man on fire. That'd be pretty great. Dude, that'd be so great.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
They show up to their next someplace with the whole family, and Anthony Smith is their fucking bodyguard. That would be pretty sick, dude.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
No, she'll get pissed, dude. You don't want to do that. And what if she breaks the story down and she finds out that that's the whole story? Stop it, stop it, stop it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
No, but that sounds like a cool movie or something. But we're just joking, Candice. Candice, by the way, we want no problems at all.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
Okay? Zero problems. Our wine scene didn't do it. Wait, wait, wait. That's what she's saying now. That's what she's saying. You can't predict her at all. No. She's brave, and she's thorough, and she's never lost a lawsuit. She is.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
But it is kind of crazy how the mainstream media had just been this machine, and then now you're starting to see like, oh, well, what about these stories you never heard about? What about the fact that some information might not even be true because it was all just kind of like part of a plan? That shit's kind of wild. Yeah. And that makes podcasting –
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
And like freelance communication or whatever it's called. Yeah. Even more interesting. Well, yeah. I don't even know what to believe now. You see clips and I start – but I'm like, oh, this is what I – and you're like, dude, I haven't – there's no real place to get completely factual truth.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
Nuh-uh. Yeah. Are you serious? Yeah. Pull that up. How many Russians died in World War II? That's unbelievable. You don't ever hear about that. Never hear about it. But why would we teach that? Right. You know? But it gives you a different concept of who did what. 27 million. Wow. Oh my God.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
Right. So they kind of like it in the beginning. Is that what you're saying?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
Or we just don't know that it's happening. Here you go again. Theo, Theo, here you go.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
I'll say that, dude. Oh, my God, she's stunning. Beautiful woman. Wow. I look like, oh, that's Anthony Smith.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
they'll cast himself in a movie I cast myself as Anthony Smith does it look I fucking my nose is a little bigger than his though lip is the same that's crazy I looked at that two times I was like I wonder how they did that but let's go wow yeah it's not gonna age well it'll be fine Candice it's um we're joking It's all jokes.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
But yeah, I mean, but the worst, if you see a Charleston White video before you go to see it, that's the last one you see?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
That's fair. Yeah. That's fair. Yeah, because I know some of those people are iffy on Charleston White in the black culture, you know?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
uh charleston white no no dr umar yeah no i'm familiar with him i just heard about him no joking one week ago no way somebody mentioned have you seen dr umar uh i think my buddy zeta told me about him and showed me him oh dude i thought this oh i thought that was fucking kendrick perkins or whatever i just saw this guy So you thought Dr. Umar was moonlighting on TNT?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
I agree with that. Yeah. Because if they have fun, you have fun.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
Damn. And so then they'll be the other ones tweeting it, sharing it, everything. And there's bots now. I mean, it's just, it's definitely bizarre. You got to trust your own gut, but yeah, you could see an article. It's the last thing you saw. And then you're like, people are like, damn, wasn't that guy addicted to drugs? You're like, that guy is just won an Oscar.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
It's just like, you know what I'm saying? If you didn't tap in and what's been going on, you know, it's all crazy, man. You'll see stories about yourself that are crazy. I saw a story that I was like a, all a jar cheese child or something from the third generation or something. And I was like, like a billionaire stepchild or whatever. And I was like, what are you fucking?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
I was like, if my dad, if we had any money, they'd never, no one ever had it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
Yeah, that's a good point, man. I think realizing that, I think, well, I think for a while you come from like a scarcity mentality, you know, where you're like, man, shit's not gonna, like, fuck, somebody's, something bad's gonna, you know, this ain't gonna be okay. This is gonna go away. Right. This starts to change or like the government's just gonna come and take everything from you.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
Yeah. And then also you like, you don't know how to have like things. And so you're like, well, dude, I remember being ashamed of myself when I didn't have anything and being ashamed of myself when I did have something. When you did. But it was really crazy.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
It was like I tried to hide, always mask my life because I didn't want people thinking that – seeing that I didn't have anything or that I didn't feel like I was anything. And then even when I got a house in Nashville, it's a nice home. It's not like some – it's a nice home, but it's not like a billion-dollar home or anything.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
But I didn't want to show people my – I just didn't want them to see like – I don't know. It's just fucking crazy. It was like – so in the end, there was some part of me that just didn't want to be – That either only cared about what you thought or just didn't want to be happy for myself no matter what.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
I know. But – It's hard to get away from that, I think. I don't know if it's hard. Some things like doing ayahuasca, that kind of stuff has helped a lot of that stuff go away, though. Yeah, that kind of stuff's been a... You've done that a few times? Oh, yeah. Yeah. I like it, dude. Really? Yeah, you do it enough times, they give you this jacket.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
Oh, yeah. Neil Brennan became the he became like this connector. Go on.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
Or for somebody, especially when your whole life you've only tried to... You've gained a lot of your acceptance from other people. Yeah. I think that's probably been a lot of my life. But I didn't even know who I was. There wasn't a me, so the only thing there was was your reaction. Yeah. So I didn't fucking... Do you think you found yourself? I think it's gotten better as I've gotten older.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
I think some of it is getting older. You're just kind of like, I can't even fucking... Whoever you are, motherfucker, we got to come out. We ain't got a lot of time left, bro.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
That's funny. That's great, dude. Uh, yeah. So I don't know, but I think also you just get older and you're like, there's just no, you're whatever part of you that still cares about that shit starts to go away. I think it's just exhausted too.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
I wonder if he probably could have done that in hindsight.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
Yeah, I think that that's a good point because once you feel like you're part of something bigger, there's some connection, then you kind of don't just think about yourself. You're not as isolated.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
Oh, yeah. Fuck, that's crippling. That shit – yeah, there's a lot of stuff that's kind of like scary I think as you get older. I think, yeah, popularity is kind of scary.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
Watching your own ego and being conscious of like what is your ego and what is just you trying to have some self-confidence in yourself, especially if some of those things are kind of like – if you're like kind of a late bloomer and some of that shit is happening, it can be – happens simultaneously. It's all, yeah. What's an example of that?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
I mean, even some of the like thinking about, I knew something about politics. It was like, just the fact that it took me a couple of weeks to realize, dude, you don't know about fucking politics. Like, yeah, you got to talk to some political people, but do, and how much do they really know? And, but it's like, don't, That's a trap, right? What do you know about?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
You know about being curious, you know about wanting to talk to different people, you know about trying to be funny.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
Yeah, and just how to stay connected to that type of thing, I guess.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
You were not in the Newsies. I was in Newsies. Were you really?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
Did people ask you that before? No, no, you're the first person. Oh, I'm sorry, dude. I can't remember when that was, but I love that movie.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
crutchy that little guy like give me the paint so fucking that was my childhood just saying fucking bullshit you got a fucking kid on one crutch hiking through fucking hiking up the LIC with a fucking sack of newspapers dude LIE LIE with a sack of newspapers
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
Oh, yeah. When I was a kid, like, if somebody could read, people would call them a fuck. You know? Like, if you got a, if somebody brought home a B on our bus, dude, if fucking you were just a, just a fucking... sick homosexuals, you know? Yeah. Yeah, they would beat you up. I mean, they would let people ride home on a bus with no shirts on.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
And I'm like, and yeah, I'm like, well, why don't people have to have shirts on or whatever? But it was just like, yeah, it was just, yeah, I don't know. It's tough. You want to kind of stay like... I don't know, as your life changes, and as you get older, things change, your life gets bigger. And you kind of sometimes want to just stay the same.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
Like, I think there's parts of moments in my life that I really miss where I was real comfortable. And I think as your life changes, sometimes, it probably is like a new space. What's it been like for you having a child since I know a lot of your special was about it? Like, the greatest was that something that took away a lot of that just worrying about yourself type of thing?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
I mean, did it really? Or you just was that something that people to say?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
Dang, huh? Little cutie. Wow, at the beach rich, huh?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
Don't do it. I think we got to do it. But for your wife, you have to say that. She, she, she. She, and this is, Nick, you know who it is. He's got a fight coming up. Michael Chandler. A little, but he's fighting Volkanovski. Oh, Diego Lopez? A little bit. Oh, my God. He's a pretty motherfucker. I'll take that one. That's a compliment. That was acceptable.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
That's pretty cute. Oh, little cutie. Now I just don't want him to hear me say that. But there's something very charming about him. She's a beautiful young lady. That's going to be a great fight. Shout out Volk, too, man. I think that is an exciting fight, huh? Yeah. Seeing Volkanovski sing the other night about that shit was so fun.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
He's got a good voice. And it's just fun to see his... It's so great, I think, if fighters are around long enough where you get to see their personalities. Of course. They used to only have to just be so tough. And now they can do that but also like have a bit of showmanship.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
Yeah, I'd like to have that, man. It's cool to hear a parent say that, too, you know? I think that, like, it's nice to hear a parent say those things about their family.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
Yeah, yeah. That's where I'm at. I'm at to, like, let me think. Oh, after you saw the baby, but you haven't gone through the journey about getting pregnant. It's just the actual seeing the child, I guess. The C-section story and all that kind of stuff. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Dude, it's incredible. Congrats, man. Thanks, man. Thank you. Yeah, good to see you, man. Great to see you, man.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
What happens if they just do 80% or whatever, 60% or whatever?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, dude. That's yes. Thanks for sharing that, man. Sure. What's it like to see your parents interact with your, with your, with your child? Um,
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
He did the intro to your special. Yeah, that was pretty cool. That was cool, dude. I was wondering, was that tough for you guys to get him to pull it off, or it was okay?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
I loved how your special started off with the joke because it just like, oh, I'm already having a nice time. Boom. I thought it was a great choice. I thought it was one of the best I'd seen in a while. Thanks, man.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
It's freaking been a while, dude. You've been caught up in some beef. You were in the fucking rat beef. I was like, this dude, I thought you were going to pop out at Super Bowl.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
Does that make sense while I'm trying to communicate? I've never thought about that before. Yeah, there's this kind of moment where... everybody pretends like they don't know you're about to tell it. Like they kind of like, there's this weird moment in the beginning.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
how many takes do you have to do with dementia? How many, how, what is that?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
That's awesome, man. It makes me sad kind of. Not sad, but it makes me – No, it's beautiful. Yeah, it's something that's real.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
Give it up for my son. Yeah. You know what I mean? Oh, dude, right when I saw that, because I remember seeing the video that you shared about him when you were going to play Madison Square Garden.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
And it was like – that was like something that everybody could relate to. And yeah, when I saw it, it was like, cause yeah, I don't know.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
I was like, how wild is this shit going to get? No, we were going to go, actually. You were there, right? No, I didn't go, man. Me and David Spade started making that movie, and so we had to shoot that.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
So as dementia, I guess someone's like, so who someone is starts to kind of disappear a little bit. Is that a fair way to say it or not?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
change perspective on shit so like i could tell him every single time i was like yeah i got he's like what oh my god what's that like you know and like so that's cool yeah yeah that's gotta be super cool yeah it is is there is there any fear that like as a part of him like that the part of him inside that will will forget that you care about him is that is that like does it make any sense kind of
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
I think I see what you're saying. So then it's like now it's like there's no way he couldn't ever know how much I care about him because it almost doesn't even matter because he cares about me so much. As a dad, you care about your kids so much that as long as they're okay, then everything else is it. You would hope. Is that kind of what you're saying a little bit?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
I mean, again— Right, I know there's a lot of instances it's not the case.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
But hey, if it makes his son happy, he's thinking.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
Damn near almost killed himself. Yeah. half the comedians you're doing it for him and he's doing it for you that's fucking hilarious dude yeah he's like he's fucking sitting there he's fucking just rubbing over drinking a Poland spring just looking for the vein so
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
What a fascinating thing that he's doing it. What a unique way to think of a crossroads of a father and son that he's doing it for me and I'm doing it for him. That's kind of fascinating.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
Especially in his era, like 20 years ago, you had no idea, even 30 years ago. You had no idea. You're just like, oh, Rodney likes to fucking sit in the car by himself. Yeah. My dad would go sit in the car by himself for a couple hours. I love it. I love it. And my mom would be like, well, if you get out of your fucking car. Like, he wants to be out there sitting out there by himself.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
The men in our town used to park their trucks behind the Winn-Dixie and cry back there sometimes. Yeah. And you'd see them just fucking... You know, you'd see a guy open his car doors to let a bunch of tears fall out and then close it back.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
Well, I think we just did it ourselves. Nobody wanted to make it. We took it out. We took it to the streamers and we... Oh, you created your own movie?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
I'm glad you get to have all that, dude. That's super cool.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
In fact, 74% of businesses on TikTok say TikTok TikTok has allowed them to scale their operations, increasing sales and expanding to new locations. And that growth means jobs. Today, there are over 7.5 million U.S. businesses on TikTok, employing more than 28 million people. And that number keeps growing. Small businesses thrive on TikTok. Learn more about TikTok's contribution to the U.S.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
Pitching it to them? We pitched it first. Okay. Right. So we pitched it and nobody... No way. Oh, dude, we couldn't get... And it was Spade, you know?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
economy at tiktokeconomicimpact.com. You know, we read for different financial advertisements on this podcast, and I want to iterate one that I think has become my favorite. It's called Acorns. I love it. It's just a simple tool for helping you learn to save, and it starts to give you different ways to look at money and feel about money. Today's episode is sponsored by Acorns.com.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
Acorns lets you get started with the spare money you've got right now, even if all you've got is spare change. I have acorns set up for my niece and nephews, and I find it charming and engaging the way that they're able to start to see how savings works.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
If you're ready to take control of your money, sign up now and join the over 14 million all-time customers who have already saved and invested over $25 billion with Acorns. Head to acorns.com slash Theo, T-H-E-O, or download the Acorns app to get started. Today's episode is brought to you by BetterHelp. Mental wellness, staying healthy in your head.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
I just felt like... It would have been nice to feel some support there. It just would have been like, hey, look, just even as a good faith thing, we'll do something.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
We're at a time, I think, in existence where we get rattled easier. There's too much information. There's not enough relationship with ourselves. I'm not trying to preach at you. I guess, shoot, I'm just talking about me, really, to be honest with you. And better help is there. If you need therapy, if you want to give therapy a try, you don't want to go to the therapist in your town.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
And this month, BetterHelp is giving you the biggest discount on starting therapy that I've ever offered on this show with 90% off your first week. Guys, don't miss this. Your well-being is worth it. For a limited time, visit BetterHelp.com slash Theo to get 90% off your first week. That's BetterHelp, H-E-L-P.com slash T-H-E-O. Yeah, just to add another universe to your life.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
Does it make you look at your wife different? Does a wife, does a girlfriend or a wife become different once they're a mother? Does something like, or what's that kind of like? A hundred percent. Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
I got two phones. Yeah, you got to put some Kevin Gates in there when they're nursing, dude. And Shiloh has a little phone.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
Shiloh has a little phone. She's like, hey, mom's ready. Oh, you don't want to talk to me? She gives me attitude.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
Oh, damn, dude. Yeah, that's crazy. Yeah, it's wild. Wow, dude. What a neat journey. And I was just impressed in your special. Like, you're just going. It's like. You know, when I first watched you, you were such a power, so I remember the first time I ever saw you at the Black Baby, or what's it called, the one that's next door to the Comedy Store? Fat Black Pussycat? Fat Black Pussycat, right?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
Yeah, it was one that kind of has the tears in it, a little bit.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
But dude, I was like, I'd never seen it, I was like, oh my god, and I had to go up after you, dude, and it was so fucking scary, and I was like, I'm sure you killed that shit. I did. OK, but dude, then this is so. And that was great. I mean, but that was just I mean, that was probably 10 years ago.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
But then, yeah, this was just so like taking me through this story and the journey. And it was I don't know, it was cool to see. It felt like grown up a little bit.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
Yeah. But then I realized it's just how it is. It's just life. Yeah. I think I didn't feel like I don't know if I felt on top. I felt like this was a brave thing we're trying to do. Yeah. It was a new thing I was learning. But I felt like with Spade, it kind of was going to be OK because kind of no brainer. Right. He knows what he's doing.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
Yeah. Well, it's just crazy. Cause you have that like spice trader energy.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
We call him Spicy Pete. Yeah, dude. Spicy Pete. That's great. That'd be a dope ass job. Just hitting the streets with what you want.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
Yeah, 10 Our Fathers right now. That's crazy. 10 Our Fathers? You can't be doing that. What does that mean? It's like you confessed it in a confessional. You get a punishment? They make you do those punishments or whatever. It's funny. Oh, dude, you did the wrestling thing. Was that interesting? Oh, that was so cool, man. It's cool. You did a good job. Thanks, bro. It looked, was it scary?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
And what's his finishing move, the tax evasion? That's the next move. We've got to move to Puerto Rico. The Puerto Rican W-9, that's his fucking finishing move. Oh, my God. Dude, does he sling? Maybe I didn't see this. Oh, Styles coming in. Thank God AJ Styles comes in to save my ass. Come in a couple seconds. I'd be toast. In front of my wife. Did part of you want a little more smoke after that?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
Like, was there a little bit inside of you that's like... I need justice, bro. Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
Aaron the Plumber. I think we had him on the podcast, actually.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
I think so, like 20 years ago. Yeah, like three years ago, I think. No, no, no, no. This is a different Aaron the Plumber.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
Joe found a baby in one of the pipes. Joe found an offspring. I'm one of the pipes. What is that? Horrible time to say that.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
I think I'm working at your place. Uh, no, who's Aaron the plumber?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
Uh, is it like, uh, that stars or whatever, like ghost book, phantom, whatever.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
Young kid, he like, he makes me laugh, huh? He's out of Mississippi, man. Gonna lavish. You can see the text went out of him. If you just go to shorts right there, it'll start it over.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
But a guy like Spade, he's done it before. Yeah, he'll fucking know. He'll have the camera in his trunk of his car. It's easy.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
Okay, get me one more. Oh, stop being humble. FN over there. Try that one.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
He just made me laugh, man. He's out of Mississippi, man. I just like his thing. He's just somebody I started watching. There's people you see and they come up. And then once you watch them a couple times and you keep having to watch them.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
Oh. Yeah. And this seems like modern-day Shakespeare almost, you know?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
You know what I'm talking about? Kind of. Yeah. There's very much a thing. We're like, yeah, yeah. It's a fellow. Really? Yeah. When the, like the figure would be like, it would open up a portal in your head where you could thought this, your wife was cheating and you would take your own life or something. Wow.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
Yeah. Well, it's funny because you start to want to have an information diet so there's things you can talk about with different guests or whatever. That's what I heard Mr. B say. He hires people to have an information diet. For him. So they all absorb stuff, then they filter it down, and then he gets this stuff from them that's fine-tuned to exactly what he would want to know the most.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
Yeah, like real intelligence. He has like an algorithm that's – yeah, he's like a human kind of algorithm sort of I guess.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
How do you run it back against those Paul guys I wonder?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
Dude, I would fucking, if I saw those people in my dreams, I would beat the shit out of them. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
I don't know, dude. I thought about trying to wrestle one of those guys. I would have to really stretch and focus on fitness. Yep. Yeah, 100%. I would have to really stretch and focus on it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
Oh, totally. Is that narcissism? Is it ego? Well, I think – I would never think, give me dirt. I would – like, if they even try to do something like that, I'd be like, this is insane. But I think what I realized then was I just want to do something if I can do it by myself, whether it's win or lose. It's like – Yes.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
But it really goes back to exactly what we were saying earlier. If all people see is that clip of you on the top rope, they're like, this guy won.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
What am I going to knock jump on the top rope? Come on. I got to tell my daughter something. That's classic, man. Yeah. Have you thought about over the years of moving out of New York? I know we were talking about the taxes and stuff in there.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
It's pricey. Have you ever thought about going down to Austin? Did you ever think about that? Not living there.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
It's kind of crazy that it almost feels sometimes like another – it definitely feels like another new center of comedy, which they didn't have five years ago.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
I'd rather make it something small and then – and even if some, like, was like, hey, come do it with us or some studio. I don't want to do that. It's like I just want to do something that it's like, okay, will people like this?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
You're leaving your world. Oh, there you go. That's what I was thinking, I guess.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
But Christian Bale is one fucking handsome guy. Well, then imagine the safe is another even less.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
He's a stud. Yeah. And I'm worse looking than you, so the tough part is it only goes another step downhill.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
Where's my self-esteem at? Don't come here for it. I don't know. I built this railroad on low self-esteem, dude. Have you ever heard of the low self-esteem engine? That's the only thing that's run on these tracks for years, dude. We're picking up. We're picking up steam, but it's been slow. Oh, God. What were we talking about?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
Right, we're not coming out. It's not the beginning of our career.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
Right. Well, there's a couple of things. One, you can get a lot of – there's a lot of like influencers and stuff out here. So there's a lot of like social media influencers. That stuff is real out here. There's movie stars that live out here and there's television shows. But I don't know if a lot of stuff still shoots in L.A., which is kind of crazy.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
Will they believe that I tried my best? Like, even if it's not that good, it's like –
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
Like even whenever we shot this little movie with Spade there, we're like – They're like, thank you. People were like, thank you guys so much. For working here. We haven't had work in months. And I'm like, what do you mean? Because I don't know who shoots what, you know? They're like, yeah. I'm like, in Hollywood, you haven't had work in months?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
And yeah, I guess there's just nothing shooting here, which seems crazy that you would build an industry where then nothing even shoots within it, you know? Like at a certain point, you can't cut every corner. Like, okay, we're going to shoot out of state to get a tax break.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
That's true. I guess then it's kind of like Barcelona or something in a way, you know, some cool museums and it's beautiful.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
I don't know. It's a good question. Well, we don't really have that district like the theater district that New York has. I mean, Danny McBride was saying this the other day. He goes, you know, I've always been kind of amazed that L.A. doesn't like historicize itself better as a structure. He's like, when you go down the street here, you should be – every other building should be this is where –
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
Right. Yeah. This is where Sidney Poitier lived the first three years that he lived here in this apartment. Like, you know, like in this these buildings, we've kept them because they're and some of it is still the same because, you know, you don't have as much wear and tear from the elements here outside of like the fires recently.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
You don't have just like the constant salt, salt in the air like you do in a lot of places. But but overall, he's like, yeah, I'm just kind of amazed that you don't go down the street and every other building is historical for some reason.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
Oh, Shirley Temple or whatever? No, my bro... Marilyn Monroe. Marilyn Monroe.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
Well, okay. Yeah, exactly. I'd like to have that stricken record. You're talking unbelievable. Well, dude, I'll tell you something funny. Here's the number one place, and I'm sorry.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
He's right. He's right. Weinstein's innocent. Weinstein is innocent. I didn't think if they're blowing anybody's dress up, it's going to be a child, obviously. Go on. Dude, when people come to visit me, the one place that I take them every time, literally as a tourist stop, is a cemetery that's near my apartment in Westwood that has Marilyn Monroe's grave in it, Hugh Hefner, Errol Flynn. Oh, wow.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
Carol O'Connor. The OGs. The guy from Bad Grampa or whatever. Walter Matthau. Walter Matthau is in there. It's just like – you just show them like this. That's kind of the neatest thing I think.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
It'd be so cool if they had that and still had it under, they had it like really locked in. Dude, the guy, the founder of Canes, this guy Todd Graves, he still has his college apartment that was right next door to the first Canes that's in Baton Rouge. And you go in there, dude, and it is crazy. It's like it's from 30 years ago, you know, or 20, 22 years ago or something.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
Maintained it all. I love it. Pictures from back then and shit. His life got busy and so he just wasn't there for like eight years. And then he came back and it's just like magazines with like Jordan and Shaq. He's a beast, that guy. Yeah, he stays so busy. He works really hard.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
Yeah. Like Christopher Columbus. You'd like. What about his sister or whatever?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
But then you just sell it and get locked in as a consultant or whatever.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
It's like that rigor mortis or whatever, whoever made Frankenstein or whatever, the doctor or whatever, he wanted to die with Frankenstein. He's like, you know, I think that's what happened. What happened with Frankenstein? I fucking don't even know what happened.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
Imagine how he feels. He's like, hey, my name's Rick. It's like nobody fucking... I'm fucking Rick Hopkins, you know, I had a fucking bad frontal lobe surgery. Give me some, God damn. That's so true. It still goes back to, you see a clip of something. And you just believe it. You just believe it, yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
Yeah, dude. Oh, how's the Trump thing going over in New York, dude?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
It was crazy how right after the election was over, everybody just kind of went on about regular life, kind of.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
Just shows up. What do you mean? There's no gold. But, dude, imagine taking off in a boat. People are like, where are you headed? You're like, I don't fucking know. You're trying to be cool, right? Because it's like your last day on the docks or whatever. You're like, I don't know. We'll figure it out when we get out there.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
Yeah, I noticed that recently. Some of the stuff he says, like, do you have to say that? Like, what are you doing right there?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
Right. Well, I think what he's doing, I believe that what Elon is doing is by creating all that commotion on Twitter, it's only helping his own business, right? So it creates now that everybody wants to see what he's going to say, but he's saying so many things it's hard to even juggle. But so many people are engaging and interacting. I feel like it's probably the number one news app.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
I don't know if it's always been the number one news app. It has to be. It has to be. But he's just stirring his own business. So the more he does that, it's more impressions, the more ads that he can sell, right? I don't know if that's true.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
Oh, wow. I don't know if that's true. But that's what the feeling you get from it. I'm at least because otherwise it's kind of in some of the shit's kind of insane. It's like, what is this? Like, how is he doing all of these things? And if he's not doing all these things, because who could have time to do all these things? Then who is doing it?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
We'll be coming to College Station, Texas, Belton, Texas, Oxford, Mississippi, Tuscaloosa, Alabama, Chicago, and Miami. All tickets at theovon.com slash T-O-U-R. Make sure to not go to any secondhand site. Just go through the links at theovon.com slash T-O-U-R.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
Nobody gives them a beat to see what the long-term plan is. If you want manufacturing jobs back in America, then you have to make it so that it makes more sense for people to make cars in America. That's just business. I agree with you. I never was against Biden. I've never been against anybody that's been in office. I've always just wanted the best. I want the best.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
I'm never going to depend on the government for my life. I don't wake up every day and see what the fucking government's doing. I get out of bed and I...
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
try and take care of myself or you know you know take care of your family like you're doing it's like that's probably what most people think yeah anybody that has time to argue online all day is also insane right like not saying that we don't all put our beliefs out there sometimes but I hear what you're saying but it's like but you have to like That's one thing.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
Somebody said the other night, oh, Trump said it during that whole state of the whatever, the delegacy address. It was like the state of the two parties are addressing. If you got to watch the hour and a half of that, I don't care what side of it. This shit was hilarious. It was like somebody who wrote like noises off or something. It was just fascinating.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
Joint Congressional Committee's address or whatever. Yeah, there was like fucking they kept cutting this white dude that was asleep. They threw Al Green out. People thought he was Jimmy Snuka. Fucking threw him out, dude. They kept people, like, Democrats that only had their feelings on little signs that said, like, not good or gazoom tight or whatever.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
That's crazy. Yeah. Yeah. Well, that's also scary when everybody has cameras everywhere now. Yeah. Yeah. A lot of people thought that was Jimmy Stunker, which makes total sense as well.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
I think it still think it was. What a body, huh? Let's get it on. Was that Al Green? Let's get it on.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
But I just don't like it. You kind of hope, like, hopefully there's some long-term strategy here. It's like, because if you just look at the little bits, it's kind of fucking scary.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
Right, America's going to be doing better. We got an opportunity to start here and get up here. Imagine if you brought some industries back where people have pride in their homes and in their towns, dude. I'll tell you this. We've gone on this tour I've been on. We've gone to probably 200. The top 200 cities so far, size-wise. We've gone fucking everywhere.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
And a lot of the places, man, it's the same. It's like there's not a lot of businesses there. There's some cities that have kind of changed and had some turnaround, and it's been uplifting. But there's been a lot of places that it hasn't. And it's sad. It's like, oh, all this place needs is one good –
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
influx of uh of people and a purpose you know when people have jobs they have purpose yeah and so it's like i'm just gonna i'm for surely gonna stay hopeful i hope that if if there's some tariff stuff and then we start making our own fucking cars here dude there's a guy who just made a show i uh a t um a t-shirt i think it's called american giant can you look that up
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
There's a guy, he wanted to find a T-shirt that was made in America, American Giant clothing. He couldn't even get a T-shirt. That was completely made here. He couldn't get a, whatever this is called, a template or a blank in America. He couldn't, they didn't have it, right? They didn't, we don't make a fucking T-shirt in this company, right? Country, yeah. So. Don't they make Teslas here? Yes.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
You drive Ford, somebody said to me. I'm like, that's when I knew. I'm like, hold on. How does this guy know how to pronounce it? Swedish guy? Yeah, yeah, yeah. But that's a great question. Let's look that up. Yeah. What cars are made here? What percentage of Teslas are made in America? What percentage of Fords are made in America? That's a great question, man.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
Yeah. I do think all of us as comedians, I think they do. I think that's one of the reasons why comedians are in podcasts and maybe does well is because, well, for one, I think we try to, this sounds fucking egomaniacal. I have no idea.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
But Tesla claims that nearly 100 percent of the vehicles that sells the United States are manufactured domestically.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
People would execute them. Something could happen. Something could happen. We don't know. Something could happen. Somebody could throw them a surprise party.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
Yeah, you're doing some fucked shit, man. Right? Some fucked shit, homie, yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
That makes you feel better about your gripe with Elon? That's the thing. Some people, they just want to win an argument, it feels like, you know, sometimes.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
Oh, for sure. They got kids, bro. Oh, yeah. Oh, dude, there's no doubt about it. But here's one thing that I think is sad about Doge is that the fact that we now have to have someone audit our own government. Our government is supposed to be the thing that we can trust. Like, it will never end now. And people are like, why is this guy having a team that audits? It's like, I agree, but...
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
But no, I heard somebody say that, like a lot of podcasters, they're just trying to figure out the truth. They just, they're not like, we don't work for anybody. So it's like you, if you ask somebody a question, it's just cause you want to know. It's not cause like there's a producer saying, let's, let's get this answer.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
I'll let anybody audit. If you bring on another company, they audit and they find I give them 10 percent of the bloat that they find. If they you know, I'm saying the simple fact that we now have to audit our own government.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
Right. We're doing – yeah. Yeah. That's a good – it is interesting how like different areas could affect your perception. And yeah, like I think a lot of like – one other thing is I think a lot of people just worry about our tradition starting to disappear, and I think that's where a lot of pushback comes from. What do you mean by that?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
just like, you know, like tearing down a statues and saying that everything is racist and stuff and not honoring our history, whether it is racist or not, like not did not like, you know, if you take it away completely in three generations, no, you know, this is the tricky thing where it's like, I, okay.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
Yeah, I think the truth is usually kind of in the middle. I think you're right, you know? And the fact that, yeah, it's like it's it's so funny. It's like you get so stuck in your own perspective of what your own perspective is. And you need to be in your own perspective because it's a survival thing, too.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
It's like, of course, if I'm sitting here daydreaming or something and I get attacked by an animal or something, then that's on me. Right. But it's like but to actually put yourself in somebody else's shoes and be like, well, what is it? What is it really like? Yeah. You know, or what is like going through like certain classes or history class or things like that, like.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
Right. I might not even be able to communicate that well a rebuttal or grill them that well, but I just want to like. I want to grill them.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
if you're a different ethnicity or a different sex or something, what's that shit really like, you know? They're supposed to have VR goggles that were supposed to be able to do that, you know?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
Look, the goggles kind of like, they set it up to make it sound like who really killed the Native Americans was Italian.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
But you could set it to any way, you know? Because he was Italian, right? Wasn't Columbus Italian? They said he was. Who the fuck knows, dude? I'm sure he was probably Italian via Israel, according to the law.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
You like watching Family Man, don't you? That's one of your favorite Christmas movies, isn't it? Gangs in New York, who do you think fucking put that together?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
They're probably written by Jews. A lot of them are, man. See? It's so funny.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
I'm trying to think of what else is going on, dude, that I was thinking about.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
Everything's fine, man. I've just been working a lot. Last year, we really focused on if we had some time off to go travel to a place to get guests and stuff. It was a big focus last year to do that. Have you taken... A vacation? No, not in a while. I was supposed to get one over the holidays and it just didn't happen.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
It's just been the beach really. I think I've been like, I think I just kind of got, I just put so much work on the calendar that I didn't start to schedules. I would love to take two weeks off and go to like a country or something.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
So, but then I started to think about that. Like, well, I should probably get a girlfriend or like a fiance first, because if you go by your, who are you going to, unless you get a buddy to go with or something, that could be fun, but it's like two weeks. You can't really go by yourself really, you know? And so then it's like, what are you going to do?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
Yeah. I'm not a doctor. I'm not a politician. Like I got in this own trap of just cause the last year we got to have some political people on the podcast. And I was like, dude, there was like a, like a month ago I started thinking like, Oh, I'm a political guy. Right.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
Cutting him a little, feeding him a little piece of yam or whatever.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
The first struggle was finding all the components, the cotton, the buttons, the zippers, the rivets. Once Bayard did all that, he ended up with his first product, a plain hooded sweatshirt. We already know all this stuff. Um, I was looking at what some of the price issues were and stuff that he faced, but it was a nightmare for this guy to do it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
And he couldn't get it done at like, you know, it came down like $37 or something, which is, you know, which, but to do it on a regular basis. And then Walmart, um, decided we're going to support him. We're going to give him like a big order.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
Right. Then you can go ahead to the place and say, look, now I'm going to order this many. Can you give me a better rate? You know?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
It's a good question. It's crazy because you don't know that, you know, it's like a lot of this stuff we don't even know. And then you look around and you're like, but if you find out that we can't even you can't even get a T-shirt here, then you're like, well, fuck, if we're not even making one T-shirt, then what are we making here?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
People started coming up to me. A political guy. Yeah, dude. Well, people would come up to me and ask me about political shit. Like asking your take? Yeah, dude. I was like, I don't fucking know.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
Right. And that's why they haven't really like this is going to be so upsetting. There's seven people.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
Right. Yeah. This list better be. So that's why I think there's still work. They're probably working with like top producers, Eli Roth, like guys who really. can put on a good show.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
He was on here like he's off. But yeah, I think, yeah. How do we, what do we, this has to be good.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
i don't know dude like you know or like so but then i started to realize wow people's perceptions are affected like how they see people where they see them at and stuff and then i was like well i do have some political thoughts like most of them are just kind of regular people's kind of thoughts and ideas like they're not super in depth um but yeah i think for like a week i started smoking my own nuts and thinking i was like fucking uh j edgar hoover or somebody you know
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
Yeah, nobody's going to tell the truth. Right? I'm just amazed that that many people wanted to be pedophiles or whatever. So here's the thing. I don't know. That's part of me that doesn't believe that. I'm like, you're telling me.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
And what if some of the girls were not even underage or anything? You don't even know if you got – you could have somebody say that. You're so scared. You're already like – there's some favor in the wind. That alone, the mirage of that, that's the biggest thing. You have no fucking idea. That's a great point too. But you're going to be so scared.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
Like, well, first of all, I don't want to see, I'm so bad at sex, I don't want anybody to see a video of it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
Yeah. I mean, it's definitely. And then it's like, how do you doctor all that up to present it to the American? Because it's a fucking you have to find you have to serve a Mona Lisa to the American people. There's because there's no. But then they're like, we have to make sure all these people that information that's released. But maybe some of that's true.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
If like you put information and has a name in it that you're not sure. And then you get sued by that person.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
And what happens from here? There's two ways we go. Talk to me. It gets better somehow. Or? Or it starts to devolve even more. And crazier – see, it gets deeper and deeper. It's so funny because I've had both feelings yesterday. I had the feeling like, holy shit, dude. nobody's going to know where to trust anything anymore. It's going to get really interesting.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
Give the guy a second to fucking try it. Every minute they're like, this is the problem today. And then that becomes a story every day. It's just like how fucked up it is. And I have friends now that are addicted to the news and I'm just like... dude, just live your life. See, everything's gonna probably be fine. It's already been fine. We're already damaged. We all have cancer or whatever.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
Everything, you know, we're doing our best and shit. And like, you know, how drastically bad do you expect things to get, you know?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
We want to know. And I think if you gave Bobby an out, even if it was 20 minutes a week where he gave a speech or something, and maybe he should start doing that to update people. Robert Kennedy Jr. would say, hey, this is where things are at, and we're going to try our best, and this is what we're going to try to do. Maybe that would be great to have some sort of an adjustment. Address. Love it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
That's a good point. And people are trusting their gut. So I think, yeah, when you do just talk to somebody and you don't let the people, let people decide, well, do I think I believe that guy? Do I, you know, and then they get to decide.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
You know, Trump's addresses. Sometimes they're so, you know, they're Trumpy and, you know, they're just like kind of the bare facts and like, you know, we're going to win type shit. So maybe if you had Vance give something that was a little bit more elongated and a little bit more had a little bit more personal feelings. and feeling to it like a... Didn't FDR do that?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
Oh, yeah. Where he was talking to people... I think you're right. We might need something like that.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
done right thanks yeah there's still so many people that just want somebody to be wrong all the time you know so maybe that'll start to go away i don't know but yeah i think if i wake up each day and i looked at everything as politics and stuff and um it would just it just starts to wear on you and then that algorithm learns you and then you're a fucking puppet you become a puppet what else is going on let's think of something in entertainment i'm trying to think of something um was there a job that you had when you were young that you miss ever
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
That you were like, I'm fucking good at this shit.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
Oh, yeah, you definitely did. I can see you for sure. For sure.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
Oh, obviously, Macaroni Grill, dude. Dude, you wore a cape at Macaroni Grill. I'm sure. There's no way you didn't.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
I'm trying to think of whatever. What about you? I worked at Pizza Shop, man. I love that shit, dude.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
Oh, yeah. We had – they'd pay you to clean – we had, like, wishing wells in our town or whatever, and they'd pay you to clean them out, like, the city.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
Yeah, get in there. Like, you had to take a ladder down and get all the shit out and stuff. And there's, like – people throw fucking – like, a lot of used, like, to-go orders and shit in that bitch. A lot of Popeyes in that bitch.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
uh decent amount of money not as much as you would think yeah um so we found a sword had blood on it once i remember like a pretty scalibert or whatever yeah um but yeah cleaning out that cleaning out those one summer that was probably the first job i ever had really but get you a little bit of money. Hide my money too.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
I used to put my money in a crown royal bag, hide it in the yard. How old were you? Dig a hole and hide it. Probably 11, maybe 12. That's a nice bag. That bitch was nice.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
Yep. Had some doubloons in it that I caught at some of the parades and like the Mardi Gras parades. There's just these little medallions kind of like they're not worth, they're not worth any money, but they had pictures of like different historical figures from Louisiana on them because you catch them at Mardi Gras. Yeah. And I put them in a bag and hide them in a yard.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
I didn't trust anybody in the house. I knew everybody in that bitch, yeah. Really? My three siblings and my mom, I was burying that shit. I ain't fucking lying.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
Oh, yeah. We talk now. Things are good now. But at the time, I didn't trust anybody in that bastard, dude, because I was sneaking in their room and stealing shit. So that's the thing.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
That's crazy, dude. What else, man? What's up with the culture? How's black stuff going over there? I know they have that new rapper, Gen Lee. Have you seen him? Oh, yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
He put two N's in it. So he misspelled it. So he could be either one. That's all I'm saying.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
And he's like, he's confident saying it. He seems really like he's from that culture.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
That's what I wonder, because I'm just wondering, like, say you're so much a part of the culture and it seems like he is like he has black friends. He says the word around them. If you're so much a part of it, but then you can't say that. Are you then is that feel like the culture isn't saying, well, you're you're you're here, but you're not. You're not – so I have no idea. But it's interesting.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
Right. Yeah, that's kind of how I think I'm going to say it. I just think it's interesting. It's kind of interesting because you have people defending him online. You have people calling him out online. Yeah. And some of his music is great, man. I mean, it's catchy.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
Yeah, it's like – and some of the lines he's saying, like, you know – don't get in trouble cause of my shit. Like, you know, I'm not saying this cause I'm, I'm just saying this cause this is who I am. Right. He even expresses in like that stand on its own. Like don't, don't get in it. Don't repeat my shit just to get in.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
At least you put a safety precaution on this. A lot of people.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
Yeah. Yeah. That's a ginger advisory right there. That's a ginger advisory, dude. But this is going to this could potentially open up gateways for some gingers to say the N-word and some spicy some because they've long been looming on the edge of the culture. The ring around Saturn, they call them. And it'll be interesting to see what happens.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
My father's from Nicaragua and my mother's just white.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
But I don't, you know, I've thought, you know, yeah, I'm not an M1 guy.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
I'm not. Fuck no. What am I fucking trying to prove to somebody? But I do remember they had like this cool band. I went to a black fraternity and we'll get you out of here in a second. Which one? I was an M1. It was like Snoop or something. State of Noop or something. Bring up a couple of black fraternities over there. Southern...
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
Hear me out. Here we go. Light it on fire. Light it on fire. I was like, this is a crazy cover band. Don't do it. And then one of their songs was like, oh, this is how you remind me? It's not. So.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
Hip-hop renditions of Nickelback. Nickelback. And just make sure you say it right.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
But yeah, look, I just spelled welcome to be in the building. So that's all I'm saying, dude.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
Never made it as a wild man, kid. I'm going to spit that whole song right now.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
Couldn't cut it as a whole, man. We got to stop. It's only going to get worse. Congratulations on life. The new special's out now. Congratulations on being a dad, man. Thank you, Bill. Yeah, thanks for being just somebody. Yeah, it's good to have, like, that there's different podcasters in different parts of the country and different parts of, like...
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
the world, you know, and it's just, we're lucky to be able to do this and, uh, and to be able to spend these conversations. I got to come up there and get on, um, on, uh, on your pod this summer, man.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
I'll be up there in a, I'll be up there in April.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
I've only heard good things, man. It would be an honor. But thank you so much for your time, dude. I know it's very valuable and it means a lot. And I just appreciate it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
today's guest is a stand-up comedian he's a podcaster um he has a new special called life on netflix it is miraculously done i'm very thankful to have him return to the podcast today's guest is mr andrew schultz Good to see you, man.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
It's crazy, right? Yeah, yeah. And you can't win. Like, we had, like, Candace Owens and Hasan Piker. They're, like, different sides of the aisle last week, right?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
Put the mattresses back in, son. We got to figure, we got to regroup. But, dude, I didn't fucking know. I thought, well, somebody from the left and somebody from the right, right? Yeah. But I didn't. Oh, bro. Sorry to go there. Yeah, I had no idea. I was just like, okay, let's hear some different thoughts and different opinions or whatever.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#569 - Andrew Schulz
Does that make sense? Who knew that podcasts would have such, and clips of podcasts would get out so much?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#575 - Lane Kiffin
One of the easiest and most important decisions I make every day is securing my home with SimpliSafe. Whether I'm out on tour or just home with a movie, I feel better knowing my home is protected. So I can focus on what I've got to get done knowing SimpliSafe has my back in a crisis. I travel a lot.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#575 - Lane Kiffin
It's awesome. Yeah. Cause you guys have a walk. I mean, I think a couple of teams do a walk now. Do people ever try and tickle you or whatever when you walk by or that's crazy. That's something.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#575 - Lane Kiffin
There's people petting people, petting adults. Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#575 - Lane Kiffin
Yeah, I've never hugged a man. People just yelling stuff. Yeah, there's a lot.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#575 - Lane Kiffin
Yeah, put the defensive tackles along the outside. Yeah, I agree. But you guys, yeah, it's definitely a ton of tradition here. I mean, this is like Morgan Freeman's front porch down here in the South. It's a slower lifestyle. Was that a little bit tough for you? I mean, what's, I mean, it is, Mississippi is the, it's a, it is like wandering back through time, you know? Yeah. There's a lot there.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#575 - Lane Kiffin
Oh, yeah. You can make everybody's a friend. They and there's also so many famous authors. So that's why the South is so full of famous storytellers, because everybody is one, you know.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#575 - Lane Kiffin
So you invited, did you invite me to Pilates or you invite me to yoga?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#575 - Lane Kiffin
It's definitely like the program is, it feels a lot different. You know, my best friend has been in hiding for years. He's an Ole Miss like fanatic. He will sit there and, you know, he's betting on test scores. He's betting on all types of stuff. He's betting on SAT over-unders for, you know, foreign exchange students. So he gambles as well, obviously.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#575 - Lane Kiffin
But now he's like out and proud kind of, you know. He's rocking that powder blue the past few years. He's really feeling the vibes, you know.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#575 - Lane Kiffin
Oh yeah. I mean, it's like, that's when you want to be there. You want to be there at the, at the angle, you know, that's when you want to be there.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#575 - Lane Kiffin
Oh, that's great, man. Yeah. Does it remind you almost of game day out there on the field? Like, is it, cause it gets pretty, I mean, you're in the sec, so it's really, this is really humid area.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#575 - Lane Kiffin
Right. You're on a pretty famous like text chain with like other SEC coaches. This is alleged. Yeah. Kirby Smart, Sarkeesian. What are the vibes on the chain I feel like? Like what is it like on there?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#575 - Lane Kiffin
Who is, uh, who's the most mysterious sec coach to you? Do you think? Um, Hmm.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#575 - Lane Kiffin
He really does? I'm totally putting that in the chat.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#575 - Lane Kiffin
It definitely looks like somebody ran a slant with some scissors across his forehead. Yeah, like a bull. Oh, it's unbelievable. And here's the thing.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#575 - Lane Kiffin
And it's a children's bull. Get an adult bull. What kind of, what kind of dishware are you guys using at the salon? No, and actually beautiful man there too. I wanted to say that Kirby. But- Oh, there you go. But yeah, like, well, Brian Kelly, they also put him on that Lazy Susan. Remember when he first came in? It's like, and that's a, it's a tough- I retweeted that. You what? I retweeted that.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#575 - Lane Kiffin
I thought this was for a strip club, to be honest with you.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#575 - Lane Kiffin
This was also a strip club advertisement near Natchez, Mississippi, I think as well. No judgment outside of there. I've spent time there, but yeah, maybe Brian Kelly is kind of mysterious. I think also maybe it's just because he's from, he hadn't, had he coached in the SEC before or not?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#575 - Lane Kiffin
Oh, yeah, dude. South Bend, just down there under the Mr. Weatherall belt. Yeah, I think that's about, I don't think they make a bigger change than that. Ready to win some real cash during the basketball playoffs? Check out Pick 6 from DraftKings. When it comes to basketball payouts, DraftKings Pick 6 posterizes all the competition.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#575 - Lane Kiffin
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#575 - Lane Kiffin
When I'm using Pick 6, I like to rock with Anthony Edwards, and I'll run the over, and then I'll also roll with Shea Gillis Alexander. and run the over, baby. Download the DraftKings Pick 6 app now and use code Theo. That's code T-H-E-O for new customers to play $5, get $50 in Pick 6 credits. Better payouts, bigger wins, only with Pick 6 from DraftKings. The crown is yours.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#575 - Lane Kiffin
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#575 - Lane Kiffin
This is the burger you deserve. The Sonic Smasher is made with Angus beef, smashed and seared, crispy on the edges and juicy in the middle. layered with melty American cheese, a tangy smasher sauce, crinkle cut fries, diced onions, and served on a soft potato bun. It's the perfect burger bite. Head to Sonic next week to try the Double Sonic Smasher for just $1 starting April 21st.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#575 - Lane Kiffin
One week only when you order online or in the Sonic app. Live free. Eat Sonic. Tax not included while supplies last. The SEC has historic venues, right? And a lot of historic, a lot of like, one thing that's interesting about the SEC is you'll have people that didn't go to college, but they will show up at the games as if it's their school. And that doesn't happen like in as many other places.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#575 - Lane Kiffin
It just does not happen. You have people who can't read, people who can't see, but they'll show up and watch a game somehow. Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#575 - Lane Kiffin
That's it. Oh yeah. Yeah. That was me. This is just a couple hours ago, getting it done with my cat Williams statue right there. I didn't know what that was like nutcracker or something. Oh, yeah. That's a that's a statue of Cat Williams that they have. But yes, is that a big part of your like is yoga like a regular part of your day usually or your week?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#575 - Lane Kiffin
I mean, they got that one guy, Roll Tide Willie now, and he was in the military with my dad's buddy. But what's your favorite place to play, do you think, in the SEC outside of Vaught-Hemingway? Well, I don't know about favorite, because favorite would be like... Anarchal, right? It's anarchal for you guys.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#575 - Lane Kiffin
Yeah, or just which one of you get out there and you're like, man, this is freaking majestic. How about that? Let's use that word.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#575 - Lane Kiffin
But since I use SimpliSafe, which I'm also getting put on my mother's home, I don't have to think about if someone strange is lurking around my house, looking into windows, being goofy, etc. SimpliSafe has active guard outdoor protection that helps prevent break-ins before they happen. There's no long-term contracts or cancellation fees. Monitoring plans start affordably at around a dollar a day.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#575 - Lane Kiffin
Oh, yeah. If a bunch of people hate you at once, it's easier to digest.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#575 - Lane Kiffin
Like, are you saving money? Oh, you should see where they keep their relish at, brother.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#575 - Lane Kiffin
Oh, there you are. Oh, that's pretty cool. Yeah. Um, did you keep that? Yeah. You still have it? I did. Hell yeah, dude. That's cool. How scary is it? How quick do you want to get off the field when you beat a team in their stadium?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#575 - Lane Kiffin
Yeah, that's a lot. And especially a woman who was going to give birth that week because her husband would be in a good mood, and now she's got to hold it another week. That's the toughest part. Okay, we lost this week. Yeah, we ain't having a baby under these circumstances. You keep it in there. Yeah, yeah. Hold the line, honey.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#575 - Lane Kiffin
We win that, you can have a Saturday night. Yeah, we'll get that thing out. We'll do the tush push. That'll help. What's one of the most aggravating traditions that you think, and what's one of the best traditions you think in college football? If you're even up on them, I know there's a ton of them out there.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#575 - Lane Kiffin
And is there one that's kind of aggravating that you see at a place somewhere? It could be SEC or anywhere.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#575 - Lane Kiffin
Yeah. Yeah. I was at that old, at the Alabama Vanderbilt game and that was pretty sick. And some guy on the sidelines squeezed me so hard, bruised one of my ribs really bad or dislocated it. Right. So I was like doing like that or whatever. And then every other player kept hugging me. So it was just, just one after the another, just the biggest guys you ever even seen just hugging you.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#575 - Lane Kiffin
Yeah, they're all excited. Yeah, and it was just, oh, dude. That was a really tough day. That was a tough year, actually. That took about eight weeks to get better from.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#575 - Lane Kiffin
Well, Diego Pavia got that sixth year, that eighth year, I think he got. Yeah, you never know. Were you surprised when he got that? Did it affect any of the way that, were your players able to apply for anything like that?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#575 - Lane Kiffin
Clark Lee. Good dude. I like Clark. Yeah. He is. Old school, good guy. They got a fun group over there. And that's kind of an underdog energy over there, too, you know? Big time. Is there an SEC team that you also cheer for on the low, kind of?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#575 - Lane Kiffin
yeah it's exciting over there yeah they carry the goalposts and then they try to valet park the goalposts i heard they got tired of it or whatever i didn't know that and they tried to valet them at a restaurant like you can't you're gonna give it to those three guys up front or whatever like that's crazy yeah but that might be the only like sec town that has valet that's a good thing that's right like when you say that that doesn't feel they know valet in most east town and valet that's a great point yeah
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#575 - Lane Kiffin
Yeah. They tried to valet. I'm at a, um, I think at a, at a McCormick and Schmicks or something over there. So definitely kind of interesting. Um, I want to talk about, uh, coach Saban. You worked with coach Saban for a while. I mean, you guys have had like kind of a storied history over the years, I think. Um, have you, do you guys still communicate? Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#575 - Lane Kiffin
So if the heat's been ramped up, what's the next thing you think you would add into the Lane Kiffin yoga experience, which almost seems like people should wear pads to be at it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#575 - Lane Kiffin
Did he have to recruit the whole time or at a certain point did the acumen of their winning just be the recruiter for him, do you think?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#575 - Lane Kiffin
Got it. Did he, what was he like? I mean, did you ever get to spend any time with him? Like, was he good at cards or anything like that? Or was he, did he do anything else besides, like, did he ever take his whistle off, you think? Like even in the shower, you know?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#575 - Lane Kiffin
Um, did he ever invite you or did he ever dress up for Halloween? Like, was there anything you ever saw coach Saban do that was like, felt a little bit more, not as much like, um, who's that guy, Robert Downey Jr. What's the character he plays? Iron that was outside of Iron Man, you know?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#575 - Lane Kiffin
Yeah. Yeah. You got to be different. You can't, when Jesus is making a comeback, you can't play defense on that day. You know, that's when you got to just call the dogs off. I feel like, but it is definitely skeptical that a one-year-old found a golden egg. Was he playing against other kids of kids like of age children?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#575 - Lane Kiffin
It's sad, but yeah, winners win, you know, that's what they say. Do you think that coach Saban misses coaching?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#575 - Lane Kiffin
I want to talk about the NIL, and then I want to talk about your team and Ole Miss here. Does— God, I sound like a sports guy or something.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#575 - Lane Kiffin
I don't know. My first down package is pretty small, I'll tell you that. That's an old wiener joke. Here we go. Now we're more... There we go.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#575 - Lane Kiffin
I want to tell you about the... Like, NIL, do you have to spend more time recruiting players or boosters these days with NIL?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#575 - Lane Kiffin
Dang, I can't believe. The fact that somebody's trying to start generational yoga is, that's next level, man. I guess that's the Lane Kiffin level, you know? And I like the fact, yeah, you hit me up on social media. I thought that was cool just to like kind of welcome me into the area today. So I thought that was pretty cool. You kind of have like a notorious...
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#575 - Lane Kiffin
Yeah, it's crazy. I agree. That's bonkers, dude. Yeah, if I'd have had some money, I'd have fucking left school the second you gave me that chat. I'd have driven across country and got me some damn dope, boy.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#575 - Lane Kiffin
Yeah. Yeah, that's what they said. Jay-Z said it, didn't he? Biggie said it. Somebody, yeah, whoever said it got murdered. I remember that. You know, April is financial literacy month. And that makes me think, well, how did I first learn about money? Well, I guess, well, I got a little job that a lady paid me to catch these cats she had, and she gave me a little bit of money.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#575 - Lane Kiffin
And I would take that money and I would store it. I had one of those Crown Royal bags, one of the purple bags that came in, and I'd put all my money in there and save it. Today's episode is sponsored by Acorns. April is Financial Literacy Month. That's right. They made a whole month reminding you to finally take control of your money. Good news is you don't need 30 days.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#575 - Lane Kiffin
You're kind of notorious on Twitter for being a unique, kind of an outspoken coach. Would you say that's a fair term?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#575 - Lane Kiffin
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#575 - Lane Kiffin
That's A-C-O-R-N-S dot com slash T-H-E-O to get your $20 bonus investment today.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#575 - Lane Kiffin
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#575 - Lane Kiffin
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#575 - Lane Kiffin
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#575 - Lane Kiffin
What's one of the biggest things that keeps players that are good players from succeeding, do you find?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#575 - Lane Kiffin
What's the craziest thing a player's ever asked you for? Just like point blank. Have they ever been like, I need a, give me a Jaguar coach or something like that. Like the animal or the car.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#575 - Lane Kiffin
So what is some of your push for players to come here to Ole Miss? He's like, what is it, you know, what do you sell them on about being here?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#575 - Lane Kiffin
some fans think that's like i'm soft yeah dude i think a lot of also a lot of i bet four of the first round picks this year will be wearing blush i didn't see like now they're wearing like nail polish oh have them wearing nail polish eyeliner booty liner some guy had on the other day they caught him Some guy I think that played for Northwestern or Nickel State or something.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#575 - Lane Kiffin
And I'm like, what is that? Who's putting rouge on their butt cheeks? So I think you're way safe here, coach.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#575 - Lane Kiffin
I mean, look, I don't want to, I don't want to have to do yoga or have to wear cleats is the only thing that I'm thinking.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#575 - Lane Kiffin
But no, I think you're right, man. Yeah. I think, well, it also goes back to what you said. It's like, you know, you don't like to follow this old playbook about things. You'd like to have this new playbook about things. What's kind of like part of that, that you offer your players or people that want to come down here?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#575 - Lane Kiffin
Do you sell them like, Hey, this is a team that's like, this is a program that's obviously it's gone. You know, the trajectory has gone up, you know, especially in the past. five years for sure in the past decade. Yeah. What do you kind of push them on? How do you get players to come here to Ole Miss? Because it's always been a little bit more of the underdog in the SEC.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#575 - Lane Kiffin
Yeah, I think it separates you from some of the other guys out there. That's for sure. I think, yeah, it makes you seem a little bit more kind of crazy and personable at the same time, I think.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#575 - Lane Kiffin
Because you have three children, right? And is it tough to be like a coach and a dad and a coach and a husband? Like what's that? What is the cross of like those jobs like for a coach? Because it takes a lot of time.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#575 - Lane Kiffin
It's a short game. Yeah, that's a good point. I don't know why I said that, but yeah, people sleep at the office.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#575 - Lane Kiffin
We talk about him every single week. There he is right there.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#575 - Lane Kiffin
Well, he's off a couple of honey packs right there. Look at him. Yeah, that's where I won't comment, head coach.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#575 - Lane Kiffin
Yeah. I mean, look, you're the only, um, you're the only college coach that we've wanted to meet up with. So this has kind of worked out. Yeah. I think it probably does have an effect, you know, I've made it. I feel like I've made it then. Well, now this college coach that Theo Vaughn wants to do a show with, you'll lose your job by the time this is over. Then that's the, that's the goal.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#575 - Lane Kiffin
It's a daily battle. It is, man. And especially that emotional sobriety. That's my biggest issue, dude. I mean, I have a certain emotion and I get literally drunk off of it or high off of it. Or the other way, I get depressed. It's like those are like my drugs a lot of times. Any feeling that I have... I'm still there.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#575 - Lane Kiffin
Well, wait, they don't? And it never is going to happen. It's just total unrealistic expectations of what I have a lot of times. Yeah. And that's one of my biggest things is unrealistic expectations. Like expecting the tide not to come in.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#575 - Lane Kiffin
Or expecting everybody to do things exactly. I want to expect that people know how I want things done after I haven't shared how I want them done. That's my biggest thing. Like expecting somebody to know what I want them to do, but I've never even told them exactly what I want. And that's a crazy person would think that way. So, yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#575 - Lane Kiffin
I can't imagine I'm going to be a coach. It would be hard. I can't even coach myself. Um, oh, so you've really taken the Oxford coach. I noticed that your son is moving here, right? Is that true?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#575 - Lane Kiffin
That's the goal. Yeah. To keep you five more minutes. Yeah. 55 more minutes. That's the goal. Um, is there a difference between the, uh, kind of the Twitter lane and, and I'm, I'm the one saying, putting you in a third person. I know you're not doing that. So, but is there a difference between the kind of the Twitter personality and the personality of the actual personality?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#575 - Lane Kiffin
Yeah. Do you have a good relationship with your dad? I know your dad was Monty Kiffin.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#575 - Lane Kiffin
Yeah, so if you don't come here, who knows if that even setup is even kind of perfect for that.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#575 - Lane Kiffin
The HOV lane, dude. Who caught that clipboard, do you know? I don't know. They brought it back. They did? Yes. Mississippi Nice. So sweet of them.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#575 - Lane Kiffin
Out of the box. You've had quite a life, you know. You started kind of... you know, you didn't start, but you kind of came on a lot of people's radar in coaching at the highest level, right? Step back into college football. You've been a player. You've, you know, you've had like you kind of a polarizing people would say type figure, very unique in your own way.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#575 - Lane Kiffin
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#575 - Lane Kiffin
And I think after talking to him, I learned a little bit more about how you operate so I can understand. But what is like a message you would get, you know, You know, you've had, you've been through divorce, you've been through, you have children, you've had a lot of just experiences in your life.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#575 - Lane Kiffin
What, for somebody out there who's getting into their middle age and is kind of struggling with having a setback or something, what is something you think you would share with them from your experience or a thought or statement or?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#575 - Lane Kiffin
Hey, man, man, I needed to hear that. Yeah, there's something I've been like, I just feel like kind of the world is ending because it's something that's kind of like just work stuff. And I'm like, what do I do? But I just have to look at it as a challenge, adjust the perspective.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#575 - Lane Kiffin
Hotty toddy, man. Hotty toddy. Lane Kiffin, thanks so much, dude. I really appreciate it. I hope that you stay as entertaining as ever. And I'm glad that you're in the SEC, man. It's one of the greatest conferences to watch. And congratulations on what you guys have done here at Ole Miss, man.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#575 - Lane Kiffin
I want to thank my friend Scott Sackfield and Richie Haik who helped me think up questions today to talk about as well because they went to school here. And, yeah, I'm looking forward to having a good show here tonight.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#575 - Lane Kiffin
At the end, there's still college students for free, you know, Lane Kiffin. Thanks so much. All right, man.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#575 - Lane Kiffin
Yeah, I'm not at the Flourish Johnson levels yet. I'll get there, though, I think. So why do you think, like, because, yeah, you do have a unique personality, right? And at least your personality is able to be seen these days. And I think that that's something that just happens more over time with social media and more just we have more video of people in general now, you know?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#575 - Lane Kiffin
So there's just, like, so many more little moments that get captured so you get to know somebody's personality. And that's how I think a lot of fans, they... I think they gravitate a lot more towards athletes, coaches, anybody really in the world because they get to know their personality, right?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#575 - Lane Kiffin
We were talking before about social media and how that kind of like, like why people kind of gravitate towards certain people on social media. And I think some of that's, that's just kind of the answer. It's just, there's more out there.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#575 - Lane Kiffin
And if people are willing to show some of their personality and not kind of follow like this playbook of exactly how things are supposed to be, but remain within HR and, HR has a box you have to stay in pretty much. Yeah. But I think, I don't know if I'm, do I make any sense?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#575 - Lane Kiffin
You already had two experiences like coaching in the SEC, right, at Alabama and Tennessee. Yep. Like, how's it been different here at Ole Miss? Because, I mean, you know, some people call it the Yale of Mississippi kind of.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#575 - Lane Kiffin
down in Oxford, Mississippi, which is where we are taping today. He's helped take that program to new heights in the past five years. He's got his own group of fans called the Laniacs, and it was great talking to him about his mentality on life, coaching, and leadership. Today's guest is the one, the only, Lane Kiffin. Yeah! Yeah, bro.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#575 - Lane Kiffin
Yeah, that's a different energy. You guys were 13 points away from 13 more points and you guys are undefeated. Last year, 13 total. Well, you need three to win. So 16 more points last year and you guys would have been undefeated. That's pretty crazy.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#575 - Lane Kiffin
What's kind of different between coaching like in the Pac-10 or I think it's the Pac-12 or something now where everybody keeps kind of like changing their names.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#575 - Lane Kiffin
And now there's like two. Everybody else left. What was it like? What do you notice different between coaching and like the pack, like a different conference as opposed to the SEC? Like you coached at FAU, you coached at, you coached in the pack 10, 2, 12, 8. You know, what's the difference you think?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#575 - Lane Kiffin
And the people that can't even read and they can – but they're just yelling, go dogs. I feel if somebody come out of a coma and be like, go dogs or something, you know? Or somebody like come out of a coma and be like, honey, honey, and then just pass away. Like people's last words, baby's first words. There's like 30 videos of baby's first words being like SEC chance or whatever. It's a lot.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#575 - Lane Kiffin
What are you doing at this cafe? You should be in school. You should easily, obviously you're truant. But yeah, it's definitely, it's a lot more intense in the South. It's just, yeah, it's.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
But what was it about? Was it because of that women's lib? Not the Roe vs. Wade thing, huh?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
Oh, you're talking about a sports court? Sports court. Oh, yeah. I thought you guys took on the judicial system. Who do you think Roe versus Wade was, dude?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
I can't believe Drewski might have a baby on the way. Yeah, she looks like she's about the same look.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
No way. I'd love to meet her. I wonder what she's really like.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
She's like very – she speaks up a lot about Palestine now. Do you think she's rich? I don't know. I bet she's doing fine. I'm sure she has lobbyists trying to reach out to her, getting her to do different stuff. Maybe I have no idea.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
I don't know. It's tough to know, man. You used to be able to know immediately when you'd see somebody like, oh, they got a couple.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
So you're talking, bro, you mean jailbird. That's crazy. And I know you mean jailbird. That is not funny, Caleb, dude. That's crazy. That's not what I meant. Well, definitely seemed like that.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
There was some men in there. There was one, I don't want to say, there was one like a first round pick. You know what I'm saying? There was like a Like that? Huh? Paige Buechers type? No, there was like, there was, there might've been a woman in there, you know, it's don't ask, don't tell in there, brother. Too much other stuff to do.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
Yeah, well, I am like begging people for burlap underwear in there. How do I get two of those spike strips so I can put them around me butthole? Around me butthole? And then I just need two spike strips at the top of my underpants. Can you help me, officer? It's officially the best time of the year for Hoops fans, playoff drama, buzzer beaters, all the chaos we live for.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
I think your hair looks great today. Dude, you know who you remind me of? No cap, bro. That girl, she's like, you will not electrocute the children. You know what I'm talking about?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
Remember, while MoonPay makes buying crypto straightforward, it's essential to do your own research and understand the risks involved. Crypto trading can be volatile and you could lose your investment. MoonPay is a tool to facilitate your transactions, not a source of financial advice. Neither am I. Trade responsibly. This show is sponsored by Liquid IV.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
I know straight up when I'm feeling dehydrated, dehydrated, dehydrated, I go to Liquid IV right there. I like that sugar-free packet that they got. I put it in my water. I take my water, pour a little bit of my water out, put it in that packet. Shake that thing up. Bam, daddy is doused. Talking about liquid IV.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
Yep, I like those sugar-free flavors of my preference, like raspberry lemonade, white peach, and rainbow sherbet. That's how I like to do it. That's my ritual. And you can break the mold and start your own ritual. Just one stick and 16 ounces of water hydrates better than water alone. Three times the electrolytes of the leading sports drink. Talking about Liquid IV.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
Get ready for summer with extraordinary hydration from Liquid IV. Get 20% off your first order of Liquid IV when you go to liquidiv.com and use code Theo at checkout. That's 20% off your first order with code Theo at liquidiv.com. Anyway, I feel like we're bombing today, do you? Bombing? Yeah. No. You think we're doing good? I don't know about that. I'm having a fun time. Yeah, me too, man.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
It's great to see you. I'm trying to think if I'll see you again.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
I wish you'd write back then. It seems like you don't care, but that's me. I'm very needy sometimes. I feel bad.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
As you get older and you have friends you got to see, but you also have work.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
Yeah. Bro, come on. Help me out. Yeah. Go to Thurnberg, dude. Yeah. The future is ours. Yeah. The future is ours. She's inspirational. I got to stop looking. Do people tell you that a lot? Yeah. I get that a lot. No, you look great, man. I was going to say. Thank you, man. Wow. Quit. Quit. No, I'm just saying because I've seen you when you look different than this.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
We're both self-critical people, I feel like. Dude, if I fucking saw me somewhere, I'd walk across the street. People are always like, dude, if you saw yourself, you'd give yourself a hug. I'd be like, if I saw myself, I'm not even joking. I'd be like, God, look at that desperate. But then I would go, he's pretty funny. Yeah. Redeeming quality. Sorry, I shouldn't say that first part.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
No, I'd be like, God, what the fuck is up with that dude, man? He's pretty funny, but... What the fuck? And then I get into a Mazda Miata. Drive off and talk to my husband. I don't know. I guess. I don't know. That whole story. Will you say something, dude? I'm tired of saying everything. What did you want me to say, dude? Who knocked up that little McNugget, boy? That's what I want to know.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
Oh, Drew, he's the best at cat. He's the best at, like, organizing that type of stuff. But, yeah, that lady, she got that little, I mean, that pussy boneless, you know that. She got that boneless pussy. You know what I'm talking about, dude. She that little fucking wiggle, baby. That thing a wiggle, boy.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
Caleb Presley, dude. What's going on, dude? Should we start? Yeah, let's start, man. What's been happening? Good to see you today.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
I mean, you run a business, right? Yeah. I mean, a lot of stuff you have to do yourself, I think, because you are you want it a certain way. It's like you kind of know how things need to be. So it's like which is tough because I do that for Sunday. But Sunday is like three minutes long.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
This is two hours. Yeah. I just want to and I like to be reminded of what goes on. I like to sometimes I'll look back and be like, how could I maybe have done things a little bit different? Yeah. I think you always just want to do a little bit better, I think, right? And then you're like, well, how are things evolving like in podcasting or whatever job you're in?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
So you want to try to be like on the future of it a little bit. A hundred percent. So, but yeah, I think you have, yeah, it's like, I think when you work for yourself or work with people in a small group, you have to stay pretty hands-on. Like, if you started letting somebody else edit your episodes, it'd be impossible.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
Oh, I think you're right. And I think also a big thing is that editors, I mean, let's give a round of applause for editors. Yes. They are amazing. Because people are just yelling at them.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
Oh, yeah. Oh, if you saw an editor across the street and you were walking by, you'd be like, oh, look at this desperate. Then you just get into your car and go home to your husband. No, they are. They are. They're the icebergs of our planet, really. Yeah. They're out there by themselves. And yeah, they're involved with cold water, but nobody thinks about them like that.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
Everybody thinks like they're about to sink a ship. Think about that being an iceberg. The only thing they're known for basically is every now and then, like somebody sees a polar bear on one of them, but really the thing they're known for most is sinking that boat. Isn't that crazy?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
Yeah, the second I saw that vest, I was like, oh, hell yeah, dude.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
Oh, did he? I would hear some crazy stuff, dude. I would hear like he would have a, I heard this one story that he like had a buddy of his. He would send him to like nice restaurants. And if he saw a pretty girl in the restaurant on a date, he would have his buddy take a phone, FaceTime phone. Give it to the girl and be like, hey, you leave this date right now. I'll buy you this and this.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
You get out of here. Meet me at the or maybe not even sometimes meet up with them, but just get them to leave a place. So because it was like some type of a control thing. That's what I heard. Do I believe that? Yes. That's I mean, that's not that crazy, I guess. But I don't believe, you know, but I believe a lot of stuff. you know? Um, but that's kind of a crazy thing.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
it's your tequila company yeah and you know you smelt it oh dude i took a deep smell off of that you really did some guys i remember it's like a little latino guy's like i'll rub it inside your nose hold on dude do not rub it in my nose but how about this i was like how about this you keep drinking it and let me put let me put my ear up to your chest Hear your heartbeat while you're on it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
Imagine you're sitting there with your date, a guy you don't know, who's probably a tough guy. Yeah. Walks up and says, Hey, you're, you have a call. And then it's diddy. Yeah. It's diddy. Right. And he's abusing somebody in the background, but it takes a break from that allegedly abusing somebody.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
Um, and then, yeah, he's like, Hey, if you leave and then the guy's trying to escape his room, guy or woman's trying to escape and he fucking throws something at him, throws a Grammy at him or whatever. And he's like, shake your tail feather. And he fucking whips a Grammy or an Emmy at the back of the guy's head. Guy's bleeding now or whatever. But he's like, hey, okay.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
But he's just like, hey, if you, I'm going to get you a couple Birkin bags if you leave right now. Dude, I would leave, man.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
Bring the check first. Bring the fucking check. Sometimes I'll leave then. I don't even really want to fucking be here. I could make a smoothie at home. Yeah, get your rocks off. Just pay that check. Yeah, pay that check. I'll tip that guy. Are you a good tipper? I am. You are? I think I am. I like doing it. I feel good about it. You know, also I make fair, you know, I make good money.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
So it'd be weird if I didn't tip good, I feel like. But, yeah, I think it's fun.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
Fuck, what were we talking about just a second ago? Greta. Is this a real interview? Thurnberg. I feel like I'm back on your show now. Don't say that, man. Don't say that. Dude, we should make a separate episode of Sunday out of this. Could you cut together a bonus episode of Sunday out of this, you think? Yeah, easily. No, easily would be fucking really hard.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
But that's what's amazing about your show. You go in there. You sit in there. A couple things come up. You accuse people of something. You make a face or two. You don't know if you have bells, Pauls, or if you're asking a question. And then you send me home. You send somebody home.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
With Diddy? Well, they said, you know, with that Diddy thing, they said they just found they were spicing the baby oil. Do you see that? No. Bring it up. Spiced baby oil. Diddy spiced baby oil. Sean Diddy Combs baby oil was allegedly laced with date rape drug. The allegations against Sean Diddy. He did. Combs continued him out.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
While the rapper has been in jail since September, arrest faces charges of sex trafficking. In a recent slew of filings obtained by E! News, one plaintiff identified as Jane Doe in the docs alleges the baby oil found in Combs' house was laced with Rohypnol or GHB, which often referred to as the date rape drug. Wow. Or also referred to as an hors d'oeuvre if you're going to see Rufus DeSalle.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
Dude, who's drinking baby oil? Nobody. They're rubbing it on and it goes into their skin like that.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
In some ways? Well, they say there's some, they say that cotton used to like, it used to be better for our skin. And then we started using all these synthetic products. And that's why a lot of people, some people believe that like some of the synthetic products could be, especially wrapped around your genitalia, like your underpants, could be causing a lot of issues in the world. Really?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
Yes, the perineum. Great word by you. The perineum's getting shorter? Shrinking. They need to put some fucking Christmas trees out there because the coastline in Louisiana is fucking disappearing. And every year, they come get our Christmas tree, dude. What do you mean coastline? There's a beach in Louisiana? Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
That guy was crazy. That guy was on a lot, man. But yeah, it smelled like very beautiful peanut flavored peanut. Tell me about it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
I'll say this. If you put your hair under water down there at home, it comes up corn road. I'll say that, dude. You'll have a little crab at the end of it just figuring that shit out, bro. So it definitely has powers in the water. I don't know. I don't think there's a beach. Look up that. Are underpants... Look up non... Look up non-cotton underpants causing mental disorder.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
This just says cotton underwear make a difference even if it's ugly. I don't care about the style, brother. Never mind. That was a wild ride.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
No, we should be talking about something. Well, when you start to think about being like, because now that you're doing your own thing, do you feel like you're more capable to do something new? Tell me about something like branching out on your own, like the fears of it and stuff like that. Did you think it would be okay? Did you think it would fail? Did you have any real fears about it?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
Because I think a lot of people work with somebody or under an umbrella, and then they go out and do their own thing.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
Peanut butter flavored tequila. Because just peanut flavored is like... Totally different. Yeah, and every year it kills like one person on an airplane.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
It's so fast. It's like, you know, in the first couple of seconds, do I want to keep watching this or not? And sometimes it's interesting. It's like something will just pique your interest. And sometimes it can be the same thing on the next day and it will not pique your interest. But then two days later, it'll pique your interest again. I think it's very fascinating.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
And I'm sure there's a lot of like coding as to how they're figuring that out. And they just keep hooking you or finding different ways to hook you. It's kind of crazy though. You'll go down some rabbit holes and with the algorithm and the algorithm can lead you to do some crazy stuff. Like what?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
like do want to do crime i'll say it like want to do crime because the algorithm is like oh yeah i saw you mingle it over there you want another hit of that fucking smack huh yeah i mean you want another fucking couple of hot doses of fucking gaza core charlie kirk oh jesus christ Next thing you know, it just gets crazy. And then you're just choking out your neighbor. Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
Imagine if there's just a wheel somewhere you could spin it. But one of the options, or 11 out of 14 of the options were bankruptcy, violence, machete attacks.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
Oh, yeah, you do. Well, Twitter, you end up as b-holes or whatever and like Christmas b-holes and all that. I'm like, it's Christmas. Can you do at least two days a year without b-holes on Twitter? That is... I don't know. They got a...
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
Right. We used to have a choice. You used to have the choice. You had to bike to get it or whatever. Now, yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
It's insane. It should be a crime. It should be a crime. One kid just came out and said he found his sister on OnlyFans and it broke his heart. You see that video? Uh-uh. Man, it's pretty sad. You don't want to show it because they're children, but it's just crazy to see people don't even think about that. Dude, I saw a stat. It was, I think, one in every 20, one in 12 girls are on OnlyFans.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
But is that a lie? Let's look it up. What percentage of women are on OnlyFans? I mean, that's nuts.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
Bad way to live. About 2% of young women are selling themselves in OnlyFans. Go to that, number five. Number four. What date is that? That's 2023. Find me something similar that's updated if you can. Give me some updated information. What percentage? Like, everything just feels like my wits end. My axle just broke on my frickin' Cybertruck. No way. Yeah, I park.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
I was like, it feels like it's weird turning. I go, look, and the fuckin' axle's broken. Dude, this is a bad question. What is that? A Cybertruck.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
Oh, axle? It's like, uh... It is a... It's like this? I can't have this guy break it off. This fucking dude couldn't. Is it like this? Yeah, it's like a... That's what it sounds like, is this? Yes. It's like that. It's like a lower joist. Are you good at handy stuff? Huh? Can you do that? I mean, I got pissed immediately when I saw it. You know what I'm saying? I knew it. I knew that...
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
I knew that that's where it was going to be for the rest of the day. It ain't changing. Uh-uh. You ever get under a car? Oh, yeah, dude. Oh, I'll tell you this. I used to have a Ford Escort, right? And this bitch would fucking go. Dude, sometimes it would take off, right? You're going to be in it, right? This was before they had self-driving cars or whatever.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
But it was just the throttle or whatever was just loose or unloose or whatever. I don't remember what it was, tight or loose. And that bitch, you'd park it, dude, and it would go like an extra 12 feet. After you got out that bitch, it would do a jolt and rev. It had a thing. It had like this kind of Civil War feature or whatever.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
But after you got out, sometimes there would be a combustion, and then it would out of the back catalytic converter out of the exhaust pipe. So my buddy Bo would always go stand back there, and then he'd be like, oh. He got shot every time.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
Oh, well, it's very scary. Dude, things get scary these days. I saw a video of myself the other day. I was driving. Somebody drove alongside for probably 30 seconds and just filmed me. Really? Yeah, it's okay, but it starts to make you super paranoid.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
It felt like a mix. I think it's just been a long year, so everything almost starts to feel the same sometimes. But I was excited that a lot of people I knew were going. Um, I did the shows longer than usual. I probably should have tightened it up a little bit, but I just wanted to be up there.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
You know, I was trying to think of things to thank people or trying to localize stuff if I could at certain points. Um, yeah, it just, I mean, you just couldn't even believe, you know, I remember the first show that I ever went to over there was, um, who's that guy? It's, oh, Gwen Stefani's husband. Um,
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
And after the show, my buddy Eddie was filming me and he's like, you going to play here one day? And I was like, I'm not playing here, dude. You're out of your mind. And then, so he sent me that video about a week ago. No way. It's pretty cool. That is cool. It really is.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
I mean, just bonkers. So I think that was fun. I was, I thought the shows went pretty good. So I was glad that everybody came out and laugh. I was just like, yeah, you just want it to go good because also that's a show you have to see those people around town or you have to wonder if everybody you ran into could have been one of those people that was at that show.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
And so that was one part that was really exciting about it, man.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
So these blacks. I was like, come on, dude. Wow.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
Dude, I think the exchange rate gets lost. I think if you're coming across that border, there's no time to adapt. People are struggling. They're climbing uphill or up like they're wet. The kids haven't slept or whatever. I think that's where they probably lose it. There's not time. Yeah. There's no two dudes who are sneaking into a country if these people are, and that's all. You're not like, God.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
I forgot about that. That was fun. That was cool, wasn't it? That was my buddy's wedding. My buddy Scotty's in town tonight. They're going to see Rufus is all. No way. Yeah. I thought about having him come by the house, but my truck broke down. I cried for a little bit, and I got kind of scared, and I just hurried back home. Yeah, the axle. One bad axle, dude.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
Oh, dude, what do you think about Bill Belichick's girlfriend? What's the word down there? Because he lives in Florida, doesn't he?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
North Florida. But he's going to your alma mater.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
People were certainly excited about him the year before. I remember when he got in in the bowl game the year before. Didn't he have to play the bowl game? Yeah, Clemson. He beat Clemson. Right. So people were stoked. They're like, put him in. You know, everybody was excited. Even that year when they were losing to Georgia late in the season, they're like, put him.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
I think he was like the number one overall pit or recruit. People were excited and he did well. And you're right. He's only one year. You can't, you know, you can't expect guys just to, or maybe now people can, people are saying now though here, I think this is it. People are saying now we're putting our money in. we better get a return on it fast.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
So I think that part of the mindset probably doesn't help the whole equation. But a lot of these guys, Lane Kiffin was telling me, you go through one section of the portal time, and then they haven't even played any ball yet. There's another portal period. And they're like, you know what? You gave us $2 million. We want $4 million.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
So that's pretty crazy, the fact that that's happening.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
Is that true? Has NIL – Google that, please. Has NIL eliminated the possibility of walk-ons or lowered the number of walk-ons on teams? I think they don't even do it anymore.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
Okay, yes. The new NCAA roster limits, including the house settlement, have effectively reduced the number of walk-on opportunities in college sports, particularly football. While teams still have non-scholarship players, walk-ons, the total roster size is capped at 105, significantly reducing the space for them. Wow. So the movie Hoosiers...
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
Years from now, people will watch Hoosiers and be like, who the fuck is that dude? Rudy? Yeah. But it won't even understand. Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
We did a show the other night and they had a guy in the front who was Mexican or alleged Mexican or whatever. Or I don't know what it's called, like Matt Finnish or whatever God calls it or whatever, you know. I don't know. And all I know is that he had – All I know is that he had salt around the edges of his shoulders.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
Right, because then you have to show up for where you are.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
People are acting like it's pretty simple. But then this will start to happen. A coach will leave, and he'll make a deal with the players, and then the player will follow him. It'll be like a deal that they make. Yeah. What's wrong with that? Right. That's part of the deal. That's part of the deal. If those are his players. So, yeah, I think there's a lot.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
Obviously, even us trying to look at it, there's a lot of little sides to it, man. But you're right. It does start to... It starts to kind of break the heart of the fan. Because you're kind of the one that loses in the end. It's just the value of being a fan. It all just becomes this kind of capitalist thing. But for years, those places, the university was making so much money.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
And they weren't even setting aside... Set aside the money for 10 years later. Every player gets some money. You know what I'm saying? There should be money. It's like... Maybe you don't give it to them now, but five years from now, they're going to get paid.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
Yeah, you knocked your spouse up there. Yeah. You know, you vomited on your buddy there. You guys accidentally...
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
touched each other there yeah right it didn't it was an accident some of you guys say you hit a speed bump going really fast in a truck people don't usually come during that but hey you know what i'm saying that's what you get for going to mississippi state yeah but what i'm trying to say starfield is ass bro have you been there i don't
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
Oh, honey, I wouldn't know. Hardee's. Yes, Hardee's is owned by the same company as Carl's Jr., bitch. Okay? What is the reason for not having just the same name? So don't say I didn't go to college. That's all I'm saying. That's a question you would hear in my neighborhood growing up. Multiple choice. Oh, dude. Oh, you don't fucking think Hardee's is owned by Carl's Jr. ?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
Tahini? Yeah, he had a little bit of tahini on him. What was he doing? What was he doing? Nothing. I don't know. He was just fucking looking for something. No, he was just at the show. But I was like, give a round of applause for Mexican people, man. They're doing it. And people went ape shit.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
I will fucking choke the semen out of your throat, honey. Crazy. What do you say to people who say childhood asthma isn't real? A lot of people are getting their tax refunds right about now. You know what the only thing better than getting your refund is? Getting two refunds. That's right. This May, Acorns is giving you a chance to get your refund matched and invested in you. That's correct.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
Knock, knock. Who's there? A hack. Oh, I love you. We all like hacks like getting the neighborhood kid who mows your lawn to wash your car too. Hey, buddy, while you're at it. Or teaching your dog to use the toilet. Yeah, he can do it. You've got to be smart to know a hack. And if you're smart, you probably know about Visible, the wireless that lets you live in the know.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
You go. Well, I knew that – well, there was a strong awareness over the years that people that suffer from Down syndrome couldn't – that they weren't – not bipedal. What is it? They wouldn't – they couldn't walk backwards, right? And some lady – What? Wait, wait, wait. That people with Down syndrome could not walk backwards. They can't. They cannot. That was what everybody was saying. Okay.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
A woman trained a young – like one of these young warriors to do it. A woman sent me a video though with somebody doing it and then – I guess that, I don't know if everybody can do it, but this kid is definitely, he's basically the Michael Jackson of Down Syndrome people. Like, I mean, he. So he can walk backwards and he's the only one. I think there's rumor that this person was.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
All right, I got one. What am I doing today? I got one. Can you hear me even? I got one. I think it's this Winnipeg Jets. Yeah, take that off, man. Huh? There's nothing under it, dude. Take it off, bro.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
Let me think. Yeah. You told me this and I still do not know. And I still don't know though. Yeah. You hang out with me for three hours. You're hearing this one. This is good. I like this. I'm going to say paper or no, hold on. Let me think a little bit more.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
I'm trying to compliment, but they're cool. But they also, they have, bring up the Mexican Easter Bunny. I've heard this dude is a fuck. A lot of times he's like in a Lucha Libre mask. And he'll kidnap your Tia.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
And people say we didn't evolve from primates. That's what I'm saying. That's what I'm saying, bro.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
Shoot a shoot, homie. Let's look at a news article. What happened? Anything in the news, Riley Mao? Oh, Riley Mao's here, dude. Can you have some waters for us, Riley? I'll take a cell. I mean, this is cool with me, unless you want one. No, I'd just love to have a water user. We have them out here. Riley?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
What do you mean? You've worked on at least 50 episodes of this show.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
Riley Mao's here. Let's get a gander at him first, man. We got to put these headies on. Riley Mao, huh? How you doing, huh?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
What's going on with you, brother? We got Caleb Presley here to talk to you today, ask you a couple of questions. I know you haven't spoken to you in almost eight months.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
Ooh, Japanese, or not Japanese. Hyundai is Japanese and Santa Cruz is California. Yeah. Have you been noticing?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
Wow. The uncreamable yellow egg, they called him, huh? That little baby quail over there, boy, unbustable.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
But hold on, before you answer that, I do want to say this. He didn't even come to any music when it happened the first time. Did you, Riley?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
I don't know. They go into other parts of your body. If you have that much, I'm sure some of it has to get back there. You can't pee it out because that's coming.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
Dude, I will sometimes just point to a guy in the front and they'll be like, this guy's here to meet a 14-year-old boy, ladies and gentlemen. Like they'll put his picture up on the screen. And the crazy part was one time they just, he happened to be with his son who I guess was underage or whatever, or his, you know, or some kid that he met and that is paying over to this kid.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
Yeah, like did you ever wake up in the morning and it felt like you'd already eaten or whatever? Did you ever wake up in the morning and feel full for no reason? No.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
I mean, kind of. Oh, a fart is just a gay belch. Dude, imagine. I don't even want to talk about it. That's gross. But a lot of dudes save them like that. They know they're going to belch or whatever, but they've been married for a long time. They're like, I'm going to swallow that one and hit her with it later. Gross. I'm going to toss that one while she's dreaming at night. Gross.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
A lot of guys are like that. Guys are sick, man. Guys are sick. Well, I won't say.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
They are disgusting. Except for Glennie Balls, too. Not him. Oh, no. He's so sweet. He's such a king. I miss him. And he was in love with a girl from here. Are they still in love? Oh, I don't know for a lot of talk about it. Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
Me and him went on a double date last year. Really? Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
Up in Wisconsin. No way. We had a little camping thing with some girls one weekend. Wait, was I there?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
Oh, dude. And they put you next to the drunkest people that have ever graced. It was me and my buddy Scott. It was his wedding. They put you next to the drunkest people that have ever graced the world. And somebody broke that toilet, remember?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
And the toilet fell off the wall. Yes. Why was it on the wall? I think they... Oh, everything is more artistic there. You know what I'm saying? They want you to... They don't want you to just... you know, I think, and they recycle. I don't know why. It was on the ground. I think I have a picture of it. You can put on this. Okay. Well, I remember next thing you, everybody's at the wedding.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
It was a long wedding. Cause they, a couple of people got up there and we're kind of chatting, whatever, making it about them. Right. Yeah. A couple people have been rubbing diddy baby oil on their legs and fucking could barely even speak, right? So we're up there and you heard like a crack and then you heard somebody scream out of this balcony window that was directly above the wedding.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
I mean it was like 22 feet from the closest patron at the wedding. What the hell was that?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
And then people – this is the worst part. They had a winding stone staircase. People had to go up there to use it. It's that restroom. But when they got up there, it was just a broken toilet laying there. It was the only toilet.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
That is not true. There are some hitters in there.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
Oh, baby bear don't want that nightie, huh? Dude, I think... But here's the thing. Would you let... Oh, wait, Raleigh Mount, what happened to you? Yeah, tell them what happened real quick so we don't forget. Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
But what happened? How much, give us a, uh, like, did you get a, like, if you had to guess just even in handfuls, how much you, like, what are we talking about there? Handful. Like in a, not a child's handful, but like an adult handful. Sorry, dude. Like a, just fucking tell us, dude.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
Yeah. And then you just keep putting on a disguise and scooting around the place. Yeah. Well, there was that, there's that, uh, that thing happened where a guy, um, he kept setting his buddy up on the kiss cam. So he would, he had a, he knew the guy run the kiss cam. So he was like, dude, Jeremy, I'll be in, you know, in 12 M just light me up on me. I'm gonna sit by something.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
bro god well you must have dehydrated your throat close up it sounds like oh my god you might have needed an r can after that homie that's a oh that's a war that's oh that's a big dose boy god what do you do with that that is uh and so riley i guess the last question is just the first one i asked is have you been doing it more and more or yeah i have you're addicted to it
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
How many times do you feel like you've had sex since that happened, Riley? Because it's been about eight months now, almost one year, hasn't it?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
And what about your walk with God? I know you were saving yourself for marriage, right?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
And that went by the wayside. Look at that. You fucked that up. Oh, that's like kicking over the only shit around a fucking good wedding, brother. But anyway, man, sorry to put you on the grill there. Yeah, sorry, bro. Do you feel like you're gaining traction in the sexual community or whatever, like that you're getting better at it or whatever?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
Oh, that's good, man. Wow. Do you feel any different? Do you remember if you felt any different after the first time you had sex, Caleb?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
Well, they kind of get unlucky. It's almost like, you know, when they say if you shake a soda up and everything, don't open it for a little while, right? Yeah. And then one guy, right, who's like, I'm going to open it. You know what's going to happen if you open it, right?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
I wonder if I had me a little child, what I would do with it or whatever. I would let it be outside or inside. Probably outside more. I cannot wait till you have a kid. I can't wait to meet him. It'd be cool, huh? That would be cool. Riley, are you guys thinking about children? Because you have a girlfriend now, Riley? I do. Okay. And are you thinking about children?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
Wow. Do you miss the days when you hadn't been, I don't even want to say, but you hadn't been just bursting out out there? Just spackling that Hanoi sauce or whatever you guys are?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
Oh, really? So you feel like you have more testosterone now?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
Amen, brother. That's kind of the key phrase nowadays. Testosterone. People are selling it everywhere. Every other Facebook ad is like, shoot up at your apartment. Yeah. Dude, when I was young, you had to go, first of all, meet a gay dude that you didn't even know because he said he wasn't gay. He was just a busboy that was in his 40s at a restaurant, right? You had to meet him.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
Befriend him by playing video games. Then he had steroids. You had to go get it from somewhere. It was crazy. Now they're mailing you steroids. Shut up. Really? Yeah, we just go through all this shit to get up.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
And his buddy, they have like this – over like 11 games, they kept finding him like sitting by cute girls. He was smooching. Yeah. Some of them didn't kiss him. Some of them didn't – they didn't like him. But some of them liked him.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
Dude, have him cream you out half an ounce over there and get you a little bit of that fucking sweet and sour pants syrup off your boy up in there. It'll fucking grow your eyebrows after. It'll grow your eyebrows thicker, dude. Do you miss the days of not having had sex, Raleigh, to be honest with you? Is there something you miss about it?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
That's cool, man. Well, what else were we talking about? Oh, dude, do you think the Bill Belichick thing has adjusted the dating, the way that dating is look? Cause it's kind of a big, like he kind of opened the portal, like the portals open for older men and younger women. Do you feel like that?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
You're Bill Belichick. Yeah. Right. He's done it all, man. I mean, he definitely has a name for himself. You know, if you're Jim Haslett, yeah, you get what you get, dude. You know? Yeah. But damn, dude, that's such a good question. Like, but he definitely, the portal's open now. I feel like it's definitely, it feels like it's more of that universe now. Have you seen any more of it?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
Have you seen other examples of it? Well, Shannon Sharpa had his thing, but he kind of got called out for it, but his was more of like sexual in nature, whereas Belichick has a – it seems like he's in a relationship. You see those videos of him on the beach with the – he's holding her up? No way, really? Pull up Bill Belichick and girlfriend beach. You know who has a good theory on – oh, wow.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
What is he doing, dude? Bro, I respect it, dude. I have no issues with it. Zero. But it is so funny. You've got to be honest. It's so funny. Well, it's up to them. First of all, bring up the next one with them fishing. It's up to them. First of all, they're having fun. Right. and it's really up to them. She's tricking him or something, or he's tricking her, right? Yeah. Look at this.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
This is that this is, uh, from whatever that movie is. Normandy or whatever. It's like there, it was like they did like this D day photo shoot or whatever. Uh,
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
Dude, well, my parents were 38 years different, so I gotta be like, love is, you know, if you find somebody that you love, then that's where it's at. You know?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
That's hilarious too. That's pretty true, man. Yeah. Oh, I think you definitely seem – you have very like Nordic Native American – what's that place where they all meet up, the bikers meet up? Oh, Myrtle Beach. Yeah, you have very Nordic – You look like a kind of a really hot chick in Myrtle Beach, dude, I think. But at like a biker place. Biker week. Yeah, biker week. Which one, though?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
For our best features, get the new Visible Plus Pro plan for $45 a month. Terms apply. See visible.com for plan features and network management details. I'd like to let you guys know about a couple of new dates. We have Philadelphia, Rochester, New York, home of the garbage plate, and Detroit. You can get all those tickets at theovon.com slash T-O-U-R. Thank you. Today's guest is an interviewer.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
Hey, go Heels, baby. That's all I'm saying, dude.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
Pull up another news article. What else do we got, man? Funeral director trashed over 6,500 bodies of pets, used fake ashes to defraud customers out of $650,000. Wow. What does it say? A funeral home director has been charged after allegedly throwing out the bodies of thousands of pets and giving owners the ashes of other animals.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
Yeah, I think it's, you know, if you want to be around, I just would, it would be crazy if you're a funeral director and you're burning up animals and giving those ashes to people. Yeah. For why? And then you don't think they're going to notice that it's not their brother or whatever. Like, oh, I got my brother's ashes back.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
Who knew he had a collar that said, response to spark, return to 4027 Elm Street. That's crazy. I don't know, man. Fuck. What are we talking about? What are we even talking about anymore, man? I've liked it, man. You have? I've enjoyed my time. No, I've enjoyed my time, but I just feel like I let you down. I feel like I waste everybody's time today. You ever feel like that? Not too much.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
Yeah, maybe. I think I'm coming. I quit taking my medicine too.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
That's horrible. I need to do more. No. Well, I started losing my mind after that. What do you mean? You should fast whenever you're like in a good state of mind. I think I was just going through a lot. It was like also not eating. You start to lose it. It's ultimate stress. You're putting yourself in your starvation.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
But the third day of fasting, your body's like, now we're going to clean this shithole out. Yeah. Starts cleaning you up, dude. I don't believe that kind of stuff.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
Hmm, that's nice. Let me see him. Manic. He had earned a spot in the Guinness Book for not eating anything for 411 days straight in 2001. I had led a team of 24 doctors and physicians to monitor this feat, said city-based neurophysician Sudhir Shah. His team carried out a number of tests and the results showed him to be a person of normal health.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
There were documentary films made on Manick's feet. Manick had given up solid food for almost two decades.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
He stopped pooping after like the third week or something. Oh, that's got to be great. He didn't poop for a full year. It's got to be great. It's like driving a Tesla. It's like you don't have to stop to fill up or whatever. It's like our unfill. Yeah. It's so good. Oh, that's good. He was working as a trader of perfumes, it says, in Koskiode. Sungazing.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
A lot of stepdads would say that, you know, if you stare directly into the sun, your sister will accuse me of sexual harassment. You're like, what? Turns out it's pretty true. A lot of areas, dude.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
Who cares, huh? Yeah. I think a lot of dudes, they'd be like, oh, that fucking hot chick's got a mustache. Greta Thunberg, you already said it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
Dude, can you find a video of this guy speaking, Raleigh?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
That's true. How long do you want to live for? But living is going to start to get different. I want to go over a couple things with you, first of all. And shout out also Winnipeg Jets today, dude. Did you see their win the other night? Bro, it's hockey, right?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
And I met this player. I met this guy in a bathhouse or whatever. I don't remember where it was. Vancouver somewhere. He's putting lip balm on. I walk in a sauna or whatever. He's sitting there by himself putting on lip balm.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
Do you have my interest? I didn't judge him. You know what I'm saying? I was like, you know, dishonest can be dehydrating. So anyway, the game, they're down three to one. With a minute and seven seconds left, they score. Okay. 2-3. Yep. Then with 1.7 seconds, the series is tied 3-3, game seven. With 1.7 seconds, they score again. Take it to overtime. In the second overtime, they win the game.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
This is what I'm going to tell you. So first of all, they have different skin now, right? I believe that there's in the future. This is, I believe, one of the last five years we'll be wearing this skin. I believe they're going to come out with a.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
material right um that will completely cover our skin so it'll both preserve your skin also allow your skin to breathe all the things that it needs to do still with nature but that it will become a new layer right that you will probably will cover most of your body right that will preserve your skin so i believe that you'll start to see that so people will be able to technically look at younger for longer right but you'll never know because you won't see them
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
Bring her up. Dude, he hasn't brought up anything you've told him to bring up yet. I know. You guys are fucking unbelievable. I said bring up a picture of the Easter Mexican Easter bunny. Oh, definitely, boy.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
And they'll just be like, hey, I look great. And then people will also be able to program based on that outer layer what they want you to see them wear, right? So at a certain point... I don't know how we'll do it, but we'll start to have like glasses or contacts that will – so I can make everybody look like we're in the 1900s today or something like that.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
I think you get to decide, the operator. Naked. Naked. You could, I guess you go naked, but it's not. I would do not, not you naked. Thank you. I would go. Yeah. Somebody, you could do like everybody's eating ice cream, like Lenny balls today. So you could get to pick and based on your eyes, everybody who has that skin, you could adjust it because it'll be able to adjust it. Does that make sense?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
Oh, this is a worse episode of my life. Don't say that. Sorry. I'm sorry, dude. I'm breaking your heart, man.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
I'll say this. I'm excited about the Indiana Fever starting back.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
We went and saw Kayla Clark break the record. Dude, it was so great. And then the other day, she's back there, shoots a three from further back than the one we saw her break the record. And we were right there when she broke the record. So tough. Have you been talking to Patrick? Yeah, Patrick and Connor, dude. Patrick came to see a show in Chicago.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
a couple weeks ago it was pretty cool he's there training for the NBA draft Patrick McCaffrey and then so that was great he came out and then yeah Connor and I have kept in touch we got to go see a game we went to the Applebee's with him after oh yeah so cool dude dude yeah we got to go see a game we went and saw one game me and Bizzle went and saw a game I don't know how oh it was Butler played against somebody and we all went and watched it but it was fun so you're a big Kalen Clark fan I'm a big fan
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
But not an Andrew Reeves fan. I'm a Caleb Clark fan. You had to cut that out of your episode. You died on that one. Bro, you see Shabuzy at that Met Gala? What was that? He looked like a pepper shaker. Yeah, he looked like a pepper shaker. Wow. Yeah, that's a wild look, isn't it? It wasn't bad. Oh, no, I don't think it was bad. But do you think that there is a real truth?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
Because in a black culture, they start to say, oh, they dress a lot of black men up like women.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
Yeah, I don't. It seems like a seance to me. It has seance-y vibes to me a little bit. And I just wonder like, yeah, there's something about it that has seance type of vibes to me or whatever that's called. Like when you meet in the woods or whatever and do something wild like that. Oh, dude, I'll tell you this one story. So we're at, we did some shows. We did like SEC, right?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
Some different places. We're at University of Arkansas. Yep. And Sam Pitt, we're leaving the gym, right? We get to go use their gym. I know Coach Pittman. He was at Carolina when I was there. No way. Dude, he's awesome, right? We're leaving the gym. And it's me and Amir Kay, this comedian that works with me on the road. And, dude, so we're leaving. And we see this guy pull up in this car.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
Dude, it's kind of crazy because the Mexican Easter Bunny, he pops into your place looking for eggs. You know what I'm saying? What do you mean? Like some bunnies, like in America, he hides the eggs. He brings them. Mexico, he fucking show up at your place. He's like, ¿Dónde están mis huevos? So I think it's a little bit different. It's a little bit more invasive.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
And it's Coach Pittman. And he comes over. He's like, what's going on, fellas? Starts talking to us. He's like, man, tell me about Bobby. And so I'm thinking, he's thinking about Bobby Kennedy Jr., right? So we start talking about Bobby Kennedy for like two minutes. Amir's doing like an impersonation. He's doing impersonation and everything. And Coach Pittman's like going along with this.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
And then he goes, Bobby. Bobby Lee. He's like, oh, Bobby Lee. Yeah. And I'm like, why do you listen to us for two minutes? Do horrible impersonations of RFK Jr. Just so he can go. Did you get to hang out with Coach Fitman? He is funny. Dude, he talked to us for like 20 minutes. It was one of the highlights of our trip. That and the Alabama players were so cool.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
And we went there, just took us around their facility and stuff. Really? They were super nice. Every place was cool. But they just went out of their way. Some of their best players, a lot of times the guys are too cool to do that type of shit. But it was great, man. Did you get to talk to the new coach? Alabama? Yeah. No, we did not get to meet him.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
Well, remember, we went back there, and they didn't really welcome us back, it felt like. You remember? No, because we couldn't find the field. That was not because they weren't welcoming us. We got lost. Yeah, you're right. We got lost for about 45 minutes trying to find the field. I think I've just realized I'm an SEC guy, man. It's all I'd like to watch. It's the best.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
The rest of it should just, what are they doing?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
Yeah. Yeah. My favorite sport was always LSU basketball. But, yeah, I think, you know, it's like I'm a Winnipeg Jets fan. It's tough. I mean, SEC's so good. It's like you just, I don't know, you start to love it all, I think. They only have like 13 sports.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
It's a little bit more like, look at him right there. He's kind of like the Michael Myers of chocolate. Like down there, I think he has. They're not hoping he comes, I think. That's what I think. Oh, my God. They're just like, oh, shit, there's just another white guy trying to colonize our shit. But if the black Easter Bunny comes, dude. Oh, bro. He'll come the day after Easter.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
Yeah. Transing. Yeah. Transing is a sport. Things have changed, man. No, but there's nothing better than being like just loving the SEC, man. And living in Nashville is so great because it's easy to get to a lot of the schools, man. It really is. It's just a little bit easier. So, like, that's been great, dude. Yeah, everything's been good, dude. We got to go see an Indiana Fever game, though.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
That would be really fun. They got a bunch of new players, too. Really? Yeah. When is their season? It's now? May 17th, I think. It starts against the Chicago Sky. I'll be out of town. Are you going to be there? No, you said... I'll be out of town, but I do want to go to a game soon.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
We got to go up there, dude. They got some great new players. Sophie Cunningham. They got Aaliyah Boston they got. Yeah, Dawana Bonner they just got. She's new. Are they the top team in the league? No. No. They're ranked four or five to possibly take the title. Yeah. Dude, they got a squad, bro. They got some beautiful ladies on the team. Where does Kaitlyn Martin play?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
Kate Martin. Kate Martin. She plays for the Valkyries. The Valkyries. Expansion team out in the Bay. Nice. She's digging it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
I hope they will. I think. Yeah, we got to go back over there. And we got to go to another SEC game, dude. Yep.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
Yeah. I want to make something, start thinking of something that to be a little bit more creative and do some new stuff, you know? That'd be fun. Yeah. I mean, you and I have always talked about it. Yeah. We wanted to be those DJs, remember? Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
Last night, we let you do, you let you do, you let you do.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
God, bro, it would be so much fun to wear long-haired DJs out there. They don't do nothing, man. Going like that to the babes or whatever. They don't do anything. They don't do shit. They don't do shit, dude. Diplo just came out with a fucking Christmas candy, dude. I'm like, they fucking can do anything when you're a DJ. It doesn't even matter. He's selling, like, urine from Jamaica or something.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
That keeps lice out of your hair to a backbeat, you know? Dude, he's selling fucking... Bubblegum with a trap beat in it. It's like he just, you know, people can do whatever they want, dude.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
Or get some AI to do something so we don't have to, we can do it, but just think about, think it up.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
Yeah, I got to go on more people's shows. I mean, even just doing Sunday the other day, I was like, man, I just got so used to just doing this so much. Sometimes you forget to go somewhere. Because then you become an interviewer. You don't become a person sometimes after a while.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
I think sometimes, you know, it seems like. But I don't fucking know what I'm talking about.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
Yeah, we go to, well, I mean, we do, we do, man. I think we've been on like 150 of the top 200 cities size-wise. That's awesome. So you start to see a lot of great places. Wisconsin has some of my favorite places I never thought. Dude, a place I just went to in Indiana. Fort Wayne, Indiana. Nice. So nice.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
No. I don't know. Why do you say that? What's so cool about it? Just like it seems like a perfect place to live if you had an idea of a perfect place to live. Yeah, but when did you go? I went in the fall. So it was right before Halloween. So like all the trees had changed color and you could go up on the mountain right there and all the trees were like changing colors.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
She had kids like walking around like the day before Halloween, like he's come from school with like their Halloween candy and like their moms were like bustling through the leaves. Like the leaves were like, it was like all changed colors were on the ground. Moms were fucking secretly vaping while they walked their kid. Tell them not to use drugs. Just crushing vape off the edge. Wisconsin.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
hey dude you want to hear stuff you don't know if it's real or not we talking to the Elvis Presley of bullshit today guys the one the only Caleb Presley man thanks for just hanging out with me dude yeah sorry I don't feel like I was myself today but I feel like I really honored you as a guest today man to be really honest with you
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
of shit dude well Riley wouldn't tell us anything either and yeah it's like 10 of that just Riley waiting on Riley to click a link still didn't get one but no that was good man it was great it was fun we gotta go see a Morgan show this year we gotta do a lot of stuff we just gotta do some stuff you know you're good about that though so we will we gotta yeah we just gotta do something this year we will alright
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
It's a date. It's a date, bro. I love you. It's a straight. Okay, dude. That's good. Dude, you're gay, dude. I'm chill. Oh, my wife's calling. Caleb Presley, ladies and gentlemen, Sunday Conversation. Make sure to check it out. Go out and support him. He's doing his own thing now, so that's what we've got to support. Creators who are independent. Thanks so much, brother. I love you.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
Yeah, I write it down, too. It doesn't help. You got to be able to read it. That's the trick, man. That's the trick about writing, dog. You learn to write, but can you read? Yeah. There's a lot of fucking people, bro, that write all kinds of shit, but then they fucking just kind of be like, you know what I'm saying? They run out of gas. Caleb Presley, what's going on, man?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
Sunday Conversation, we just got to do it, dude. Thank you for having me back. It's your own show now, so you guys are free from Barstool.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
It was good, man. I felt like it was the same. Everything felt exactly kind of the same.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
Oh, that's true. Yeah, it was good. Yeah, that was fun, dude. And you guys just did, who else have you done recently? Did you have some episodes you've done that aren't going to come out, haven't come out yet?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
Oh, so that'll already be out then. It'll come out, I think, next week, maybe.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
And in his country or whatever, that's crazy. It's like you could buy a mountain or something.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
He's a content creator. He's a voyeur. You know his show, Sunday Conversations, where he's had pretty much everyone on as a guest. This interview is one of the most hectic interviews time just it's this interview was hectic and we did our best and uh you live and learn but i'm very grateful that i got to go through just a it's just a long day with my friend mr caleb presley
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
Oh, yeah. Who was that little? Bambi. Oh, was that who? It was little McNugget. She looked like Glenn Big Baby Davis. You know what I'm talking about? Yeah. He's in jail. Is he? Yeah. Free Big Baby. Oh, yeah. Dude, she looked like she'd been behind bars, alcohol serving places. She looked like she'd been behind bars a couple times.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
Exactly. I know him pretty well. That's it. Well, dude, I've heard all types of things about Drewski, and I won't say any of them, but a lot of people say that he's mixed or whatever.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
Yeah. Yeah. And he gets jokes. He sees what's going on. You know, he's great. He's fun to be around. Yeah, bring up that little baby bear he had on there. Bambi. Oh, Bambi. Bring up Bambi from... Memphis. No, this is Bambi the cartoon.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
Yeah, this is Bambi the baby deer. I think both of them have been shot, though. Bring up Bambi from Could Have Been Love. There you go.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
She's funny, too. Get a better picture of her, man. You can't really see her.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
Oh, dude, jail is basically like being at a— It's like an influencer trip. It's like Raising Cane's takes you to F1. It's basically like a Cinnamon Hampton Inn. Have you been in jail? Yeah, I've only been in jail for one night, though. You spent a whole night there? Yeah. What'd you do? We sang at the beginning, because I was trying to fit in or whatever.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
What about beforehand, before you went in there? Oh, apparently giving drugs to kids. Unreal. What state? Unreal. First of all, Mississippi. Mississippi? Bro, you're going to pop me for giving drugs to kids? When everybody here is recovering from opioid addiction? When they tested these syrups, they tested 9 out of 40 syrups at IHOPs in Mississippi, tested positive for fentanyl.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
and they're gonna come at me that's unreal i'm just a boo-boo kitten did you get any good flicks while you're in there chill out huh no what did we do dude uh we sang there was a little bit of freestyle rapping and then uh prayer personal prayer and that was it man and then let me out do you pull all-nighter did you sleep um Oh, no, you don't sleep your first night. That's a rookie move.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#582 - Caleb Pressley
What does it do? Yeah, you just got to – you can't be the guy that gets in a prison like – Oh, so you got sharpening your knives. I'm going to get a little bit of shut up. Dude, no, you basically have to spend the first couple hours chaining your ass to the wall. It is – freedom is not freedom. I mean it's a lot in there. It's a lot in there, man. What about you? Have you been?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
Some guy putting his home address or his email address.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
I am curious about Austin. I'm curious. Because last time I was there, just his energy... There is a lot of excitement. The club will be sold out. I mean, Joe's club will be sold out forever.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
Yeah, but even you go to some of those other rooms. You go to Red Band's room next door. You go to, there's the Black Cat or something. Uh-huh, Black Rabbit.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
It's probably because you and Rogan have been friends for so long. You've just been so intertwined with a lot of those guys. And because you've done so much work yourself.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
Yeah, I think he's doing it. I mean, he pushes. At the end of every episode, he asks everybody. He's like, so, you moving to Austin? Oh, yeah. He tries so hard. He really does.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
No. Like, yeah, if that's that much of the stress, then you guys are having a tough time anyway. Yeah. Yeah, you make a little money. You see your friends with nothing to do when you're there. Getting to be in there. People don't realize you get to meet whoever Joe had on his show that day is going to be at the club that night.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
But it does feel energetic there. I'm seriously considering trying to get a little house there someplace where I can be there more often because I want to be able to work on comedy more. I do feel like I get a real rep for comedy when I'm here, actually. If it's not a show that I put on, then you get up. I feel like L.A.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
She's like, yeah, maybe this guy's all right. Yeah. At the end, she's like, jerk off in front of me. You can do it. Don't ask. I'm not into that. She's changing her old MO. Yeah. Dude, I really think. Yeah. I think Louie. Bill Burr, probably the funny, they might be, Louie's the funniest guy I've ever seen. The funniest person I've ever spoken to. He's the most creative, I think.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
Your face will thank you and so will everyone else. You have a new comedy special coming out.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
Wow. So things have changed. That's right. In America, for sure.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
Like, nah. Do you find, as you've been in comedy for how long? 25 years. Wow. Right?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
Do you feel like in the beginning you were just telling jokes? Like there was a... And now that there's any more purpose, I just wonder, like, I try to look at, like, do we evolve as comedians? Because you hear some people say we evolve, right? You hear some people say their whole goal, their whole life is just to get up the punchline. Some people want to start being philosophical, right?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
Do you feel any difference or notice anything about that for yourself?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
Yeah, I saw a clip where you were with Harry Mandel. He was talking about anti-Semitism. Somebody was.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
Yeah. Yeah, I remember he, there was one time he was, oh, I think it was when Trump was running for office and nobody can understand how I like, I was excited that Trump was running because he was a, I was like, if that fucking dude can win, then anybody could win.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
Oh, dude, the first time that he won, I remember driving down the street and I've never even been a big Trumper. I've never endorsed Trump. I don't think I voted for him the first time. I don't remember if I voted for him the first time. But, I was like, fucking anybody can win.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
Right. Yeah. You're like, anybody could win. That's the part that was fascinating about it. But I remember how I was scared. It was like, oh, no, when they had that Richmond neo-Nazi, that Nazi thing in Richmond, remember years ago? Oh, yeah. What was that? It was like those guys had bought those tiki torches or whatever.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
Oh, it was Robert E. Lee and Stonewall Jackson. Two of them. Now, that's New Orleans, isn't it? That's Charlottesville?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
Oh, yeah, with just insane teriyaki lunches every day.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
You know what I saw the other day? Oh, I was talking to my, I was talking to this kid and he didn't know what AIDS was, dude. What? Yeah. He doesn't know what AIDS is. I was like, kid, I was like.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
I was like, dude, what about AIDS? And he's like, AIDS? And I was like, AIDS, you know?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
But where is it? Kids don't even know about AIDS, man. It's gone.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
Oh, wow. Yeah. Yeah. I don't know. I just felt, I'd had an exhausted week that week. We'd had like a couple of interviews. I think it was in New York and in Nashville. And so it was just like a lot of traveling. I was like, I do not want to do this today. You can really have to prep for it. But it was just like burnt out, you know? Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
I don't know what their culture is. That's a big sign, usually. Dude, they're starving over there. They could have been ordering soup. Dude, any joke that ends in soup, Jewish people love it for some reason.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
That's hilarious, dude. That's fucking hilarious. What are we talking about? Jesus Christ.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
I remember, yeah, they were like at a school or whatever. They made us do like a round of applause for HIV or whatever it was. It was like something like some thing they had at our school. It was like clap for AIDS or whatever. Clap for it? It was like somebody would clap as long as they could to raise money for AIDS. Like one of those things. Like do it as long as you can.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
Like an AIDS-a-thon or whatever. Okay. And it was like, I just remember being in this gym and people just, it was like somebody had to keep clapping. So you had to tag in somebody else to clap. And then if you got to a certain number of hours, then you raise a certain amount of money.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
That's not funny. But when you're here, everything's funny, dude. Oh, what is this right there? Oh, an unfortunate product name. A Y D S. I was overweight.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
The term enjoy AIDS. And people are like, where did AIDS start? Intuible form.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
But, yeah, I think people, some people have said that they think it had an effect on the election and stuff. I don't really think that.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
Let's just drink this yeah, and we all were cool about it, and just fuck yeah Yeah, if nobody calls the other person gay we can enjoy do this Yeah, don't be the first one to take that shot in the revolution Zemo was kind of Zemo was one of a kind it cuz it had caught the bottles and it kind of it was a malt liquor You kind of had it and a malt liquor idea to it, but it was was it lemon flavored I?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
Is the IP still available you can't find Zima anywhere else though. It is sold in Japan. I'm going to Japan Are you I mean now? It's a weird reason to go I got a lot of unique stuff over there. Yeah, I Oh, what did I see the other day? In China, there was a, did you see this Jackson Hole, this city in China that they built?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
No codes. Look at this place. This guy built, I visited China's $170 million little America replica town. It's a town of Jackson Hole.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
Yeah, so it made of Jackson. It just looks like America. This guy went to visit it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
And everything in it is... Wyoming. Yeah. What? Who does this? How can you do this? That's wild. They built a few of these. How big is that town? Who's building it? China. Just to bring new people in? Old churches? I think rich people it looks like. Yeah, what is it? Can you give me some information on it? So you can live in China but be in America? Yes.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
Property taxes. Jackson, Old China is a resort town on the border between Hualai County, Zhangjiakou, wedged between Taihang and Yan Mountain Ranges. And architecture is designed by the town. Jackson, Wyoming. Is there ski in there? Damn. I don't know. Let us see some of that information. Cowboy bar. The Thousand Single Home Development used stock Western home plants from an architect in Oregon.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
Yeah. I wish we'd have gotten more time to get to. I wish I got more time to talk to Donald Trump because I thought it would have been just I knew we only had about like 55 minutes. So that's a unique amount of time.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
Yeah, I wish you'd have got. Dude, I had a dream last night, actually, that I interviewed Tim Walls, actually. He's the loser guy. He was the guy that set... Yeah, he was on the losing team, and he was... What did you interview him about? What did you talk to him in your dream?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
I can't remember, but he was so cool in the interview, and I was like, dude, no, people don't know if you're so cool or not. We have to come... Let's talk, people, you know? But I think... I bet they're all kind of cool.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
Thank you. Obviously, she's into showing her body off, though. She's got some really, like if I were a baby. It's rude to not show it off. Right. It's a good point. If I were a baby, dude, I would just pretend like it was morning all the time. Just like breakfast.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
Full terms go to the Panera store page on DoorDash. I have some tour dates to tell you about. I'll be in East Lansing. I'll be in Victoria in the Canada. I'll be in College Station, Texas. Belton, Texas. Oxford, Mississippi. Tuscaloosa, Alabama. Nashville, Tennessee, baby. and Winnipeg and the Canada and Calgary and the Canada. All those tickets are at theovon.com slash T-O-U-R.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
Yeah, I think a lot of them just probably either want... Or they want... That's the thing. It's so hard to know what they're really like as opposed to what you see. Yeah. Until I think you get some sort of like a vert, like something of them that seems like somewhat relatable to you.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
Oh, yeah. Makes sense. Did you... You think you'll have any children already? What do you think? No, I had a vasectomy. You did? Yeah. No way. I was taking chances. You were? I was taking too many chances. So you were actually trying to have a child? No. What? Sorry, what are you saying then? No, I was just pulling out late. Oh, you were? Yeah. I don't understand how people do that.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
I know a lot of black guys like to just do the nut or whatever. The nut is great.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
Shut up. I've never done it. Yes, you have. I've never ejaculated inside of a woman. Then you haven't lived. Really?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
But every time I do the... What if she's like, I'm on the pill? I barely know her. So I'm not believing that.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
Oh, you're in there just like one of the Ghostbusters just throwing ectoplasm in there.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
I'm going to end up being a father. People are always getting, I don't want to be in a lawsuit or something. Find some old chick. Find some post-menopausal chick. Get to me more. I want to get a regular wife that likes to.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
Who was the last? Betty White. Betty White. Betty White. Estelle Getty was so. She was old when it started. Right. She was the looker. Rue McClanahan was the one that everybody, my dad kind of had hots for. The youngest of the slutty one. Yeah. Blanche. Devereaux.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
Do you think they will cure... Do you think that being gay will be something that will be eternal or one day that that will be hacked or something? That we can cure it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
Oh, I think most people are like, who cares? But I just mean, maybe cure is not the right word, right? Do you think that they would, do you think that they'll ever... A vaccine. Vaccine, yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
I don't know if we're going to find out soon if Bobby Kennedy gets in there.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
The latest viral COVID-19 conspiracy theory boosted by QAnon falsely claims vaccines turn children gay or trans. Wow, I didn't know that. And that's a false allegation that COVID-19... Yeah, I mean, a lot of kids, I will say, seem very gay, though. Do you notice that?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
Okay. Yeah, I've heard it both ways. I didn't really know which one was correct, but yeah, nuclear.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
There was I've heard rumors that a lot of Haitians moved over there in there at the parks and stuff and were selling sex and stuff like that. Have you seen any of that over there? Hookers in Bushwick? Yeah, in the parks over there. Selling their bodies? Yeah, they were selling sex and oral sex over there. I mean, Haitian, that's not who you'd want. I mean, who you want is who you want.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
I guess it's the, I don't know what the pace, the rate is.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
Yeah, one of my friends was telling me there's a lot of hookering going on over there in some of the parks. Haitian hookering? I think they said Haitian. I would have to ask them.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
That could be it, you know? Yeah. Yeah, it's a good question. That whole inauguration thing was just such a game. You went? Yeah, I had total Game of Thrones energy over there.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
It seemed weird. Well, I think the biggest thing that seemed like it's been on the table for me is just the free speech stuff. You start to worry about like a lot of these social media companies limiting speech, limiting what's possible.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
Oh, in a heartbeat. Yeah, people gave me grief for going to the inauguration. I was like, dude.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
Yeah, I think people are starting to get hip to, like, how much of it is... Game of Thrones, like, image shit. Yeah, how much of it is, like, this person is doing this, or they're being told this, or this is the plan. Kamala did not have a good strategist, whoever their planner was or whatever. Who was that? Who was their... That's one thing I've never read. I bet it wasn't the Swami.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
Yeah, it's like, how am I not going to go to inauguration? I have no idea. What if it's not even real and there's video? It's the moon landing. Who knows? So I went and at least saw like, okay.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
Was there food? At the ball, the food was not good. That fucking broke my heart. What do you mean? Tony was there. He's like, we did it. And I'm like, the food isn't good, Tony. We didn't. We still have room.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
It wasn't that good. And they only had like 30 chairs in this whole ballroom. And there was probably 1,500 people in there.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
That was the most hectic part. But yeah, just to be there, to be in Washington, D.C., to see that happen, for sure. I was like, fuck you. I'm going. I would never be weird. I would never think it was weird if anybody went. Is that you there? No, but pull those people back up. So this was the part that was fascinating to me. These were, this was. These are the guys deciding our fates.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
It's not making our society better. Well, I agree with that. But say I'll say that type of thing. People will be like, well, a government can't decide what can and can't make their society better, right?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
I joke, he's the sweetest guy. He is. What do a mechanic and an auto shop owner in Georgia, a taco restaurant operator in Arizona, and a life-saving medical innovator in Tennessee have in common? They're all small business owners and they're all thriving on TikTok. Across the U.S., over 7.5 million businesses, from family-owned shops to entrepreneurs, are using TikTok to compete and grow.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
In fact, 74% of businesses on TikTok say TikTok is has allowed them to scale their operations, increasing sales and expanding to new locations. And that growth means jobs. Today, there are over 7.5 million U.S. businesses on TikTok, employing more than 28 million people. And that number keeps growing. Small businesses thrive on TikTok. Learn more about TikTok's contribution to the U.S.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
economy at tiktokeconomicimpact.com. Even if you think it's a bit overhyped, AI is suddenly everywhere, from self-driving cars to molecular medicine to business efficiency. If it's not in your industry yet, it's coming fast. But AI needs a lot of speed and computing power. So how do you compete without costs spiraling out of control? Time to upgrade to the next generation of the cloud.
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E561 Ari Shaffir
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
Right now, Oracle is offering to cut your current cloud bill in half if you move to OCI. For new U.S. customers with minimal financial commitment, offer ends March 31st. See if your company qualifies for this special offer at Oracle.com slash T-H-E-O. That's Oracle.com slash Theo. Life in general can be chaotic.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
But why do we keep building stuff that's bad? But if people say, well, if your government says you can't, then that's a form of communism, right? Your government says you can't have this and you can't have it. Because we shouldn't have... I mean, we just had a woman on, we're talking about Pornhub, and extremely high percentage of their content was totally unregulated. So they had...
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
uh rapes on there they had unconsensual sex they had sex with minors they had sex with babies on there on pornhub on the website but their whole goal was just to have as much content as they could have because then they sell more advertising dollars because like we have this many urls we have this many links that people can go to so they're selling in bulk but they didn't have anybody or they had very few people moderating any of the content that came through
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
I don't like it. Twitter does that a lot, I noticed. Twitter definitely can be a place where you can really get trapped in there. Do you notice that, Nick, you think?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
I mean, I don't think we should do. I don't know what we should do.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
Well, that's the same thing that I noticed with this woman talking about with porn. It was like they would bring up these cases. There were cases of people who had been raped and their footage uploaded. Right.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
oh my god oh and you can't just go what it's an open source thing like no no you're facilitating it right right that's the thing people are like well we and they at one point she said they only had one moderator who would spin and something had to be flagged like 15 times before it even comes into before it even comes into the moderation queue you're already fucked over and the moderation queue would be like hundreds of thousands of videos long that they have to sit there and then there's just one person deciding yeah adult not adult consensual not consensual the problem is you start with like they need to have some oversight they're gonna go too far yeah
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
Well, and then you wonder, is human society supposed to have this success story or is it a –
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
You have to at least do something. But then it's like I think people have lost total faith that their country is going to do a lot.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
But I think like, I mean, we talk about it a lot in here, like with the Sackler family, the company that made all the drugs and they- God damn, and they're still- Still alive.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
They're incentivized to financially. Who's even making money? Is it just to go back to pay for victims?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
Yeah, there's nothing worse. Because if your planned line doesn't go good for a celebrity, you have nothing. That's it. You stand there like an asshole. Like, I've done that. It feels so shitty.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
Let's get this really quick. Purdue Pharma Sackler Families boost contribution in opioid settlement to $7.4 billion. The company and the once prominent family behind the drug OxyContin agreed Thursday to increase their financial contribution to resolve mass opioid litigation. The Sacklers and Purdue Pharma boosted their settlement contribution to $7.4 billion.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
If approved, the new plan would end the costliest corporate bankruptcy resulting from the U.S. opioid crisis.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
Under the new settlement, the terms of Sacklers' control of Purdue Pharma ends. The $7.4 billion... Oh, they have to give up the company. ...will go directly to communities across the U.S., including states, counties, cities, and territories over the next 15 years. Well, that's good. That's good. That's good.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
I know. There was a night where Johnny Depp was at the comedy store. Oh, yeah. I heard about that. He's the star. There was nobody like him. He was... He was everybody, dude. He was in that movie, Peter Pan. He was in that Peter Pan movie. Was he? Yeah, what was it called?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
Yeah, what are you going to be? You're just going to use Yankee candles all day? Fucking... Dude, some of the candle smells have gotten crazy.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
You know what I'm saying? That's one vote for Trump right there.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
Two things to do in the world? Yeah, in America, anything. I would probably say sentence the Sackler family to death, I think.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
that's fucked by this well yeah most most of america i mean just the aa rooms alone you see so many more people that aren't alcoholics they're open they're at their opioid addicts from pain relief straight to heroin and it's a different thing it's like the aa program helps them but it does it's not the same it's like these people their database has been compromised and altered they're they're
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
I don't know, can opioids affect your genetic makeup over time? Can they alter? Lose teeth. Your DNA?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
Your grin. But yeah, yes, opioids can alter DNA. Which may contribute to opioid use disorder, these changes. So then you're not even talking to a human then. You're dealing with someone who's been compromised by a drug.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
That's not even what I'd tell them. At least they stopped them from doing it. But now they have another new anti- What's that? There's a new opioid I just saw that they were putting up.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
Oh, that's the best. That's the best. Bro, when I was in college, they had this group of gay fellas that would come and they'd fist fight. It was called, I've said it before, we'll beep this part out, but it's called Fist Fights, right? And it was their company. They came. It was gay men would come. You pay five bucks, go there, you get a beer, and you get to watch fights.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
And they would beat the living shit out of each other, dude. Wow.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
Have there ever been no cockfight? No. But there is midget versus rooster or whatever. Oh. Right near the border.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
Yeah, are you talking Ariana Grande fans or are you talking like hardcore?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
I bet he could. He's got to be able to overcut. I think he auditioned for Newsies and got pretty far. So I bet he could. Dude, don't pick that fight. You're not going to win that. Yeah, you're going to win this fucking... Is that Carlos Mencia? Why does he dress like Carlos Mencia?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
Finding Neverland. Oh, God. That's a good movie. But anyway, so then suddenly, I'd never even really been backstage at the main room. I wasn't getting on stage there much of the time. And I'm like, oh, I got to go back. Got to go back. So you walk in. The back room back there was packed. Like you could barely even move.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
Shane Gillis? Yeah. How can you even see that's in eight pixels? Let me see when he turns. Pause it when he turns and we see his face. There.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
Okay. Love that chicken from Five Nights. That's a new commercial right there. That's him. Wow, that's great. That is so great. Oh, that's great. What are we talking? Oh, but what's the new drug? You see it, Nick?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
Yeah, there we go. FDA approved novel non-opioid treatment for moderate to severe acute pain. Yeah, that's what they need. Yeah, this just happened. Jurnavix, J-O-U-R-N-A-V-X, is the first drug to be approved in this new class of pain management medicines. 50 milligram oral tablets, a first in class non-opioid analgesic to treat moderate to severe acute pain in adults.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
But wouldn't you just get addicted using this? But does that mean you don't? But it's non-opioid. Maybe it's not addictive.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
What the fuck's an opioid, too? Targeting a pain signaling pathway. So unlike opioids, which act on receptors in the brain, Gernavix works by targeting a pain signaling pathway involving sodium channels in the peripheral nervous system. A lot of words I didn't know in that.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
Blocking pain signals before they reach the brain. So it's stopping the signals instead of the receptors in the brain. Oh, this is like the difference between LimeWire and Napster. Yeah. It's like pretty much the same, but it works different. Yeah. That's a good comparison. Thanks. Evidence of non-addictive properties.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
Clinical data showed no evidence of withdrawal or drug-seeking behaviors in patients. That's it. Right. The drug does not activate opioid receptors or induce euphoria.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
Meanwhile, people are just fucking sleeping in fucking baby beds and shit. God, those lean backs are fucking crazy right now. Opioids are a class of drugs that interact with opioid receptors in the brain and body to reduce pain perception and produce various effects that can be natural, semi-synthetic, or synthetic chemicals.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
Yeah. People will start to, I think, be a little bit unnoticed. There will be some sort of. Yeah, because they're serial killers. I don't understand how they were not.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
Everybody's having like these fake conversations and kind of has their body lightly turned towards Johnny Depp.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
I'll say this. If you show me 40 Chinese, dude, I don't know how I'd feel. You just **** on the same one over and over again? Be honest. Well, it's kind of like this. One time this lady paid us to go get her cats in her yard or whatever, and she was very old, and she would give us, I think, a quarter for each cat that we brought in. Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
And me and my buddy William just kept bringing the same two cats in over and over again. Fucking...
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
No, it was a different group, I think. That was one of the best things about doing comedy, man, was just the places you got to go. You couldn't afford it. No.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
Mike, is that Mike Costa with us? Patrick DeGear. That's Costa. Yeah, it looks like Costa. Patrick DeGear, Mike Costa. Who's Patrick DeGear? The blind one. Oh, yeah, Patrick DeGear. Yeah, he's blind. That's you on the left? Yeah. Damn. I had good hair back then.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
Oh, Rogan. I couldn't imagine, dude. I feel like you never see. I feel like a lot of people, you never see him. He doesn't do a lot of.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
Crazy. Went to the A. Dude, Guantanamo Bay, I didn't realize, first of all, nice golf courses there. Underrated. You'd never know it. We got to see the prisoners play some volleyball.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
No. They wouldn't let us get that close to them or whatever. And some of them had blindfolds on or whatever, but they were still playing. Unbelievable. Just to do like to get out in the yard or whatever and have a – Oh, the prisoners. Yeah. Oh. Yeah, they had these... They could play volleyball? Iguanas down there, foxes, rodents, unique animals. They had a beach, this thing called Glass Beach.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
It used to be glass, but it all was rounded out now. From the tides? Where else did they send you? Azores? We went to the Azores, which is somewhere. Is that Portugal? Yes, off the coast of Portugal, between Portugal and America. Thank you.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
I'll tell you where the AIDS is. You know, you're like, what's this guy? And it's just a gay guy that's flirting or whatever. But it was like that at the – that was it. And he was in the back. I'm coming out. I think – Oh, that's Edgar. That's right. Yeah, he was with Edgar. And who brought him? The guy – Doug Stanhope. Doug Stanhope brought him from Arizona. And everybody was just like –
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
Trying to be in his presence, his aura. You could soak it in. You could bask. You could just see him. And I can't even remember if I got to meet him or not. But if I did, I think it was one of those things like, oh, see, things are going good or something like that.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
But I met a guy in my neighborhood. I never talk about that whole trip.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
James was his name. James. But anyway, yeah, and I was like, oh, that'd be perfect. That sounds so cool. Oh, it was great. Yeah, semester at sea. It was like a floating school. Took off out of Canada, out of Vancouver over there, and just went around the whole world. Finished in Florida. We stopped at Cube on the way. You did? On the way back, yeah. Fidel came and spoke to us, too.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
It was pretty crazy. Really? Yeah. What? But then we just tried to get out. Oh, dude, I'll tell you this fun thing that happened. So we went out. And nobody spoke any Spanish or whatever. We would just do like that if somebody talked to us in Spanish, you know? We would fucking just do that in order of Cuba Libre, you know? Oh, man, they're great there. Oh, yeah, they have an aclap.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
Yeah. A lot of people will travel over there. It's different in Cuba. The flick goes further. And then, uh, so we were at this thing, we're just walking down the streets and finally we find this kind of party going on. It looked like it was some people, there was like a birthday cake and stuff for this old guy. And these people like we're drinking and we were drinking.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
So we all just start kind of dancing in this little kind of four year area, like off this, the edge of this house and stuff. And we're hanging out and stuff. And we're singing happy birthday and dancing. And then you start to realize, look over, and this old guy is going down on this woman. They were hookers that they'd hired for this birthday.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
These two old dudes had hired some hookers for their birthday. What? And we're just fucking there, like, cutting the cake with them and shit. We're like, what the fuck are we doing, bro?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
An alcoholic with a dessert. It's hard. It's fucking. It's a replacement. What else do you see there? What else did we see? Went to a baseball game. Oh, I miss doing that. And when we left, we were throwing everything we had off of the edge of the ship. Like.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
This is still the Return of the Rat Tour. I promise we'll end it one of these days when we've gone all the places that we can go. I'm very grateful that you guys continue to support us. Today's guest is a stand-up comedian. He's a podcaster. He's been an integral part of comedy for a long time, bridges a lot of years and connections between other comics. He's certainly a type of glue.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
tennis shoes any just because they didn't have like just things that like yeah we're like what are we gonna do take this shit we don't even fucking care who cares because you kind of made friends with the people while you were there they had this guy named henry that was taking us around and he um and it was just so we're just throwing everything we had just off the edge of this boat just take it yeah take it here here here okay all kind of stuff yeah because they could use it it was that was pretty awesome that was really great
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
Yeah. And they had horse meat. That's what they served us at this conference. They served us horse meat. And then they had also, like you wore this translator machine so whenever Fidel was talking and the speakers were talking, you could hear what they were saying. Whoa. And then some people got to ask him questions and shit. One kid got him to sign his passport. Fidel Castro? Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
Signed somebody. Wow, that's a perfect thing to sign. Signed somebody's passport. Wow. Pretty fucking cool. You met Fidel Castro? Some little slurper. I don't know if I met him. I don't think I did. But you saw him. Yeah, we saw him. He came and spoke to us, like 600 students or maybe. And then I'm trying to think of anything else that happened that was super great over there.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
I just have them pretty quick. And we just drank with like a lot of like homeless people. Like a lot of times you would pull in, you're on a boat docks. You were always like around like homeless people and shit and wherever boat docks are. Right. That's not, that's not the typical vibe of a city. Right. Like sometimes it was like cool, like Miami.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
And then sometimes it was like, you were in like Jersey, you know, like you just, it was hit or miss, you know, some of these ports you went into. So you'd roll off thinking, like, oh, we're going to be in the lap of, like, some cool area, and you'd just be in, like, the industrial and the docks, you know, like in Belfast or something. Yeah, exactly. Who would go here? No one in L.A.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
goes to where the ships dock. People are just getting fucking wasted. I've been at sea for nine months. Get me hookers and drugs now. Oh, dude, all the staff that worked on the cruise ship, they were from, like, Trinidad and Tobago and stuff like that, and so they would all go get hookers the second that the boat docked.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
You'd see them file out like ants just to go get hookers in these different countries.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
God, yeah, there's nothing scarier than if you have a line for something and it's say this because your brain doesn't think. It's just like, oh, everything will go good. It's not like, well, if that doesn't get adhered to, then what are you going to do after that? Yeah, you plan ahead. Like once that goes great, then what do I do from there? I'll talk. I'll listen.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
Oh, yeah. Yeah. That's great. And what do they call it? Wind on you? Wining. It's their dance. And it's toboggan? I guess so. Steel pan, all that shit. It was so fucking cool. I love that. What do you notice after traveling to some of these places? What are the things you miss about America? And what do you think are the things that we lose by being such a capitalistic environment?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
Pregnancia. He just... That's when you really, that's when your nuts go missing right there. Wow. Jesus, lady. I know. Alto, alto. I caught a pickpocket in Croatia one time. Got a picture with him. He pickpocketed you? Caught him fucking just like that. And then you're like, I'm not mad at you. Let's just take a picture. Let's get a photo of you. And he ran off. Little guy.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
Little fucking five-year-old ghost thieving. Hey, no.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
I'll say, hey, I will – then I'll ask, yeah, maybe we can get a photo or something. Yeah, but God, it's so scary when that first line doesn't go good because then you don't know what to do. Oh, it's so embarrassing. It is harrowing kind of. And that was at a time when celebs – there was like a real hierarchy to celebrity then. I feel like celebrity has gotten very –
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
Let's look about Jouvet. Can you find me any information on it? It looks beautiful. It's the day before. So color. A traditional carnival celebration in many countries throughout the Caribbean. The parade is believed to have its foundation in Trinidad and Tobago with roots steeped in French Afro-Creole traditions. Wow. Such as Can Boulay. Can Boulay. What is that?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
Oh, yeah. Can Boulay is a precursor to Trinidad and Tobago Carnival. The festival is also where calypso music has its roots.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
Go back to that information, Nick. It was originally a harvest festival. It was drum, singing, dancing, and chanting were an integral part. Huh. Yep. Can Bule has played an important role in the development of the music of Trinidad and Tobago for it was the banning of percussion instruments in the 1880s that led to the surreptitious innovations that gave birth to steel pan music. Oh, that's cool.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
it's the party for the sake of party and it's like the downstairs on the on the titanic yeah you know yeah everything else just gets a little bit ridiculous out here that i think you definitely notice that more in big cities yeah club club life clubbing in europe is about like doing drugs and dancing yeah and here it's about like bottle service and velvet ropes prestige yeah yeah that kind of stuff starts to disappear once you even get out of i feel like some of the bigger cities
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
I always noticed too that Australians travel the most. It's like they go do it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
There's always like one outlier thing they're going to see.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
I want to see Mickey Rooney's grave over there. Yeah, they go for like two months. I know. It is really incredible. It's almost like that Amish thing. What's the – where they go? Rumspringa. Rumspringa. Yeah. Australians almost have that. We're like, I'm going to go see the world.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
Everybody has social media, everybody has a website, everybody could be a star. You also see the real them now, the real, real celebrities.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
Would you see that picture that just came up about Mars? You see that? What about it? They found this crazy thing on the photo. If this photo is real, did you see that, Nick?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
Yeah. What? It's kind of fascinating. That's unsettling.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
Oh! This year's Square Enix Fighter of the Mars behind Brandon Wilde has space fanatics completely baffled. Yeah, that's a straight line. Yeah, I'm trying to see if we can get a clear picture of it. I'm sure they were too. Yeah, facts. Oh, that's it right there. So you start to wonder, because your mind also starts to say, well, okay, that's a square.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
And the shittiest thing for me is UFOs have been in the water recently. Do you hear that like a month ago? Yeah, why wouldn't they hide in the water? Yeah. And you're like, okay, so you're telling me this whole time we've been looking up. And they're down. And they're down. Oh, you tricksters. It's like part of a Scooby-Doo episode. It's like, what? I'm not worried about them harming me.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
This was a – they tell me something. CBS News. Yeah. Tim Burchard said in an interview Wednesday that an admirable whom he did not identify told him an unidentified craft moving at incredible speeds in the sea.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
But also, oh, they've been in the water. Oh, we were looking up here and they're down there. Have you ever thought to tell us about the water?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
Yeah. That was good. That was better than the other one. You win the round. But I was like, this is so fucking dumb, dude. Now they're in the water. It's like, so they're not up here? It just was so dumb to me.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
Yeah, things have gotten, yeah, celebrities used to be kept more in this kind of hidden realm kind of.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
Let's see, Bariloche. Where the women swim like swine. Let me see it. You don't know how to spell that? Yeah, I was going to say, how do we spell it? It's up to you, really. You're a great American. Yeah, it's up to fucking you, bro. It's up to you, boy. Bariloche. Bariloche.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
You just heard about it from somebody? It's so funny when you hear about something when you're a kid and you just remember it forever, you know?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
La Crosse, Wisconsin was a place that I liked in America.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
Give me the grassroots. Bariloche, I'm going to write that one down. And that's La Crosse, Wisconsin. I think it's one of the best little cities. Bariloche? Bariloche, yeah. Where the women swim like swine. Oh, yeah, there you go. There's Granddad's Bluff over there. Bariloche. Oh, yeah, bro. That's what we need, more Bariloche. In America, yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
And then I would say in America, probably I would go with La Crosse, Wisconsin as a place that I really think is a great place to go tour or see. Just nice. It's like if you thought of an ideal place in America. Yeah. Like especially like... Where like in the fall, the leaves change color and it's like a cool mountain, but you can still ride your bike everywhere you wanted to in town as a kid.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
And you have just enough of a little downtown with like some three-story buildings where you're like, oh, that's downtown. Cool enough, two bars. Yes. And everything, but some cool old shops and stuff downtown where it really feels cool. How many people live there in La Crosse, Wisconsin? 52,818.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
So a good enough size, too, where it's like, you know, you'll have some neighbors, you have some good sporting events and stuff like that. You're close enough to drive to Green Bay to cheer for the Packers. But yeah. Right. Right. But far enough away. Like we don't go. Right. Like this is their downtown. So everything, you know, just kind of perfect.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
Yeah. I want to do some more. Like I think maybe after this year, then I would just get a camper and do like a year where I just go around the country, do some like interview just regular people in different places. You're good at that too. And just have a. I saw you interview like a school bus driver once. Go touring. Who did we interview?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
We have a hostage negotiator coming on soon. No, it was somebody more regular. And we got a Native American. A couple years ago.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
Probably switch off. Or if I have a family at that point.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
Yeah, do you think that's growing up or do you think that it's changed? Maybe it's changed. Maybe, but I mean, I always take out the fact that I'm getting older and growing up, that that could be part of the realization of things.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
yeah skiing doing anything yeah i think some things just get like you're like you want to work but then you're like have i done enough work i don't know but then you start working so much you don't know what you're doing anymore sometimes too just autopilot wasting time it's funny i have two different sets of friends and half of them are like pity me for not buckling down enough and the other half look up to me for for like paying it back in enough i think i look up i think i always admire the fact that you go and do these fun things that seem to keep you alive
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
I got a proposition for you. Maybe I'll tell you off air. Okay. That's fair. Yeah, I want to come on and talk about the semester at sea. That's what I would like to talk about. Okay. So we'll do it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
Dude, we had a girl. She fucking did a water slide somewhere in like Vietnam, which nobody knew they even had. Yeah. Broke out both of her front teeth and got knocked up by a mariachi player, dude. A mariachi player in Vietnam? I know. What do you mean we had a girl? I don't know. She was just on the cruise ship, too. Because that would be it. You'd land in a port with the cruise ship.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
You would take classes while you're on the ship. And the program's called Semester at Sea, and it's amazing. You'd take classes. But then once you got to a city, people could go do whatever they wanted. You could be back at whatever? Be back when the ship leaves at like, oh, 1700 or something. So people would come back with drug habits. Some people would come back with amazing stories.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
People would come back with their teeth in their pocket in a full wound. That's like Fantasy Island. It was just, some people would, people would stay with it. A couple people would like fell in love and just fucking stayed. They're like, fuck it. A couple people got busted with drugs or whatever and they just left them there. No. Yeah, rules are rules, man.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
No, my buddy's dad was in Love Boat. Yeah. Really? What was he in Love Boat? He was a captain, I think. What? He was a captain. Captain Stubing? Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
Every now and then, you bring a piece of information that he doesn't have. That's when his mind is blown. How did you know this? Well, he's a library. Imagine going to bed when you're a library. He's a fucking library. It's like you go to the front desk. You're like, hey, do you have this book? And he's like, let me see what I have. And then he shows up with the information that he has.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
For a pothead, he really remembers it quite a lot. Un-fucking-real. That's, I think, I mean, he has a lot of... He's a hard worker, but I think he just has an endless memory.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
Genuinely curious. I'm already like, I know enough. Dude, I know so little, and I gave up then. I think that was my MO. Ari Shaffir, we got the new special... America's Sweetheart. America's Sweetheart on Netflix. On Netflix. Congratulations, man. Thank you.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
Yeah, get a lesbian who's a Timothee Chalamet impersonator. Yeah, without even trying. Yeah. Yeah. But even that would go further with a young generation. It sure would.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
That's going to be nice, dude. Okay. As soon as we're done, I want to suggest something to you.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
Yeah. I'm ready to take a suggestion. Yep. Thank you, guys. America's Sweetheart, Ari Shaffir, his tour after the backpacking or before?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
I didn't care. I think sometimes we do an episode and I'm like, that was the best ever. And I'm like, you guys are fucking, we're all idiots. It is fascinating how the idea of planning a trip is so hectic and then you just plan it. And then like the day comes where you're sitting on the plane and you're like, this is the best decision I ever made.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
They'd be like, what the fuck? Ari Shafir, man, good to see you, bro. You too, buddy. Yeah, are you living in Austin now?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
God, it's good. Yeah. We had a taxi took us in Vietnam straight to a bird animal place that had hookers in the back. So pet shop front, hooker back. How do those go together? Just what a combo. Hey, kid, play with the puppies. Dad's going to go in the back. It was kind of like when you see those Pizza Hut Baskin Robbins or whatever, where there's that merger or whatever.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
You're like, yeah, I'll take a couple of scoops. A couple of scoops and a wing. Yeah, dude. I'll take a fucking piece of pie and a fucking, and a gerbil. Ari Shafir, man, you endlessly continue to create content, man, and put your comedy out in the world, man. Yeah, I'm trying to have fun. Yeah, you always do. Thanks. Thanks for coming and hanging out, man. Yeah. Good seeing you, buddy.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
And they're pretty immediate over there too. Yeah. Like the second you're there, you show up on social media.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
They're pretty good. Do you, are you amazed at the success of Austin or with the comedy scene in Austin? What do you think about it? Do you, it's exciting.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
They don't oh Where they're weak the comedians you mean?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
Yeah, they've kind of started out like doing well. Yeah. Kind of like the JonBenet of comedy.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
At first, I was like, what's this going to be like? It seemed like a lot of when Joe went. But then also Tom Segura went, which was huge.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
Yeah. Yeah, that's kind of the last time I was there, I was like... you could go up and down that street and do kind of five sets in a night if you wanted. And I was like, well, that is nice.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
Oh, that's a good question. Especially Shane. I feel like is the biggest guy in the world right now. Yeah. I feel like he's like, I don't even know who I would compare him to.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
That's hilarious. That'd be the best. That'd be the best cop.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
in the humor world his latest special america's sweetheart is now on netflix you know his podcast you be tripping and he's currently on the farewell tour going now through the rest of the year i'm always excited to spend time with him and catch up today's guest is mr ari shafir
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
Well, I think a lot of the people from the podcast are that realm or whatever people that podcast. It's like a lot of the audiences know us.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
they just see us so much you know going ahead of time they already know your backstory yeah they saw so many I mean they've seen so many clips or for you or things that are out there you know and a lot of it's stuff that we didn't even make it's like other channels making shit it's like you know like I know there's like Legion of Skanks has like extra channels that are always just making their shit and putting it out yeah
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E561 Ari Shaffir
Yeah. And it's, it's great stuff, but it's like, so then that just gets so much of it out there.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E566 Candace Owens
I have some tour dates to tell you about. Victoria in the Canada, I'll be there. Winnipeg and Calgary as well in the Canada. Miami, Florida. Fort Wayne, Indiana. Chicago, Illinois. Tuscaloosa. Alabama, Oxford, Mississippi. Belton and College Station, Texas. Tickets at theovon.com slash T-O-U-R. Today's guest is a political commentator, an investigative reporter, and a podcaster.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E566 Candace Owens
Yeah, it's just – yeah, they can easily catch me outside of an Eddie Bauer or something.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E566 Candace Owens
years ago that was chastising tucker carlson like he was i think he was in jackson hole like he was in wyoming where just nothing happens in wyoming oh i think i remember this clip maybe yeah but he was with his children he was with his children and that's so bizarre because then the kid is witnessing the kid is like what's even going on right they have no idea who i my kids have no idea who i am yeah he's like i thought my dad sold nicotine pouches he's a he's a he's a
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E566 Candace Owens
Yeah. I saw, oh, is this the clip? Is this him talking about it?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E566 Candace Owens
Yeah, people can get a little bit crazy. Yeah. So that's kind of your biggest concern. Do you, did you see that Trump signed that executive order for the healthcare?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E566 Candace Owens
Yeah, I think it was like two days ago. Can you bring that up?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E566 Candace Owens
They're like it was mined from the Tylenol mines in Rome or whatever. And you're like, that is you're lying. This is unbelievable, though. I mean, this is I think this is amazing. This is empowering patients through radical price transparency. Today, President Trump signed an executive order to empower patients with clear, accurate and actionable health care pricing information.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E566 Candace Owens
Sometimes I don't think about that. It would be great if your AC or whatever had like a Caribbean setting or whatever. And you could have set that and suddenly like some great music came out.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E566 Candace Owens
The order directs the Department of Treasury, Labor and Health and Human Services to rapidly implement and enforce this. the healthcare price transparency regulations. They, the departments will ensure hospitals and insurers disclose actual prices, not estimates and take action to make prices comparable across hospitals.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E566 Candace Owens
And yeah, I think because the number one cause, this is one thing that like during the pandemic, I've never really been super political, but one thing that I did latch on to over the past few years is this program called Power to the Patients. And Fat Joe has been like an advocate for them. We've done some stuff for them. John Jones, the UFC fighter.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E566 Candace Owens
But it's that, yeah, when you go to, yeah, there they are right there. When you go to the hospital, they can just say, agree to pay. Then you get the bill later and the prices are insane. But you have no idea what the prices are.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E566 Candace Owens
That's true, but the price they charged him for it is insane though.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E566 Candace Owens
And then some guy's trying to get you to gamble offshore. Suddenly you're like, what temperature is this? That would be so crazy. They should have. Where are all the cool settings for the HVAC? Right.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E566 Candace Owens
I mean, it wasn't an accident, but I thought he was deceased. He's not.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E566 Candace Owens
Yeah, it's sad. Feelings go fast these days, man. But what are you saying that it's very similar?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E566 Candace Owens
Yeah, it's unbelievable. And this was one thing that Bernie Sanders and Trump agreed on. This was one thing that both sides, it was bipartisan, right? But my question is, because now when you go, you can say, okay, well, if it's $700 here for this MRI, I'm going to call across the street, and they're going to have to make it $500 if they want your business.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E566 Candace Owens
So now you'll get to the actual prices eventually, right?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E566 Candace Owens
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E566 Candace Owens
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E566 Candace Owens
I like picking a player and thinking about how they're going to do. And then you get to watch the game, and if they do better or worse, you can just kind of really take it out specifically on them. And we don't even get mad at a whole team. I like picking Lonzo Ball because he does a lot of actions. Picking more of this and less of that. Don't settle for a smaller payout.
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E566 Candace Owens
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E566 Candace Owens
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E566 Candace Owens
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E566 Candace Owens
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E566 Candace Owens
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E566 Candace Owens
And then the stress too. That's the thing that Bernie Sanders was talking a ton about. It's like the stress that people sit there because the number one cause of bankruptcy is medical debt in America. And just the stress that that causes people. You've lived your life, suddenly you're sick. You're going to get sick anyway because you're getting older.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E566 Candace Owens
12 days of gray and rain he he almost loves it he just wants to retreat to his library oh yeah i think all british people are always just writing war letters and stuff that's how i kind of always envision them they're always just looking out the window and writing about the war to each other that's what my husband does all day of course yeah and then even paddington bear their bear has a coat he's not even like our bears are naked you know what i'm saying like i'm not saying that that's the way to do it but yeah if you bring up an american teddy bear real quick
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E566 Candace Owens
And now you just are stressed at the price because they send this thing. And then the value you put on your own life at that moment and the constant stress of calling these companies and just this war. And yeah, medical debt is the leading cause of bankruptcy in the U.S. accounting for 66.5% of all bankruptcies. And there's a talk right now of Medicaid being cut, right? But
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E566 Candace Owens
This if and I'm hoping this is part of their plan that they will enforce this that because that's the problem. This happened before that Trump made this an order and it wasn't enforced. It was when he was leaving office. So I'm hoping that this time that this is something that they will enforce. And we'll actually get the prices down.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E566 Candace Owens
And then you won't even need as much Medicaid because the prices will be real. So I'm hoping it's part of like a simultaneous thing that they're doing.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E566 Candace Owens
Why do you think it takes – like this is one thing I'm noticing about government. It's like no matter who's in office, whether it's Republicans or Democrats – It's always the same shit. Nothing ever changes. It's like you would think at some point they would give you the – you know, you would get some of these things solved. Like even with this, like why does it take something so long?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E566 Candace Owens
Like are both sides just screwing? You start to think that just both sides are just screwing us.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E566 Candace Owens
That slurp lizard's been in there for frickin forever.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E566 Candace Owens
And there's a problem where – People shouldn't be able – if they're in government, they shouldn't be able to then work for lobbies right after because then they're working for the lobbies. That was one thing.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E566 Candace Owens
But every American feels that way. So why is – like what are we even fucking doing then it feels like?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E566 Candace Owens
Yeah, and lobbyists are writing half of the bills too. That's one of the craziest things.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E566 Candace Owens
But how do they keep them from just saying, hey – Wouldn't you think at least two or three people a year would be like, hey, this whole thing is a fucking charade?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E566 Candace Owens
Yeah. Now, some of these are obviously some pretty right wing bears. Put up a bring up a politically neutral teddy bear.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E566 Candace Owens
Yeah. Yeah. I think that's what dumb found me the most. And you believe this program, you believe it because as like, I guess like an American or a citizen of any country, you want to believe in the altruistic nature, not totally altruistic, but at least maybe 75% altruistic nature of people or that people want to do well. Um, And yeah, I think that's one of the things that's most baffling.
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E566 Candace Owens
And then at a certain point, does that just have to start to turn because the grossness of wealth is starts you just start to see how sick it is and how sour it is. That's easy for me to say that, you know, I can pay my mortgage and I have, you know, know that I can afford food.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E566 Candace Owens
So maybe that's an unfair thing for me to say, but I just think there's this overall kind of theory there or feeling there. So what do you think is going to be different about Trump in office this time? Like, I mean, I think it's if they enforce this thing, that's going to be amazing. I'm curious to see if they will. But what do you think is going to be different about him in office this time?
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E566 Candace Owens
I agree. I can't believe that every day there wasn't a newspaper article from every... company that was like hey there is a man who is obviously being commandeered right um who is a puppet because he is not mentally well it's not even a knock on him the guy's not well right it's like if somebody did that to my grandpa grandfather or father i've said that forever you know and you know
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E566 Candace Owens
It's embarrassing to the rest of the world. It's like people can tell the guy's not well, and they put him on the bike for 40 feet or whatever, and it was like, who put him on the bike? Falls over. Well, it's just like you can't put that guy on a bike, dude. It was elder abuse. It is. That's what it felt like to me.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E566 Candace Owens
It felt like elder abuse, and it felt like a horrible way also for the world to see us like, oh, this is what they think of their elders, right? And that kind of hits you in a place where like, man, it's just gross. Mm-hmm. Like people took advantage of this guy. I'm amazed that his wife didn't speak up. Maybe that his son – that his children didn't speak up.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E566 Candace Owens
But also I don't know what their lives are like. I don't really know. And maybe he wanted to not. There may have been a big part of him that he did – was able to speak well and communicate and said I don't – I want to keep going. But what do you – like I'm kind of conflicted about Trump like with his – stance on Gaza, right?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E566 Candace Owens
Oh, that's a good point. I never even think about that. Oh, yeah. Because if you see some people cooking some of the stuff I've seen them cook, you would call the police in some communities. But in other communities, you're just sharpening your silverware. So, yeah, I agree that that's interesting. But, yeah, they should have definitely some better settings on the AC.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E566 Candace Owens
I think it's become both sides of the aisle now just see that human people just feel like this is it, that it's just wrong.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E566 Candace Owens
What's happened is wrong. Like probably a year ago, people were afraid to even say that. And now it is what everybody is saying. Like even Piers Morgan is saying it on his show now. Like people are saying it's obvious that you can't go and annihilate and genocide this culture and make them disappear. And then Trump to come on top of it and say they're going to build –
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E566 Candace Owens
Who's gonna you're gonna go on a lazy river where there was?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E566 Candace Owens
If they had Caribbean, like you turn that bitch, set that bitch to plantains or whatever.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E566 Candace Owens
So there was a Jewish organization that they had pedophiles.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E566 Candace Owens
Hide from justice in Israel. But can't they hide, can't most people say if you are, so these are people that are Israeli citizens?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E566 Candace Owens
Okay, has been trying for years to find Caro and help bring him to justice. So Jimmy Caro, he's a wanted man and is considered dangerous, accused of assaulting a nine-year-old girl in Oregon in 2000. He fled to Israel before authorities in the U.S. could apprehend him. But is this just one guy?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E566 Candace Owens
Oh, I think – I don't like that Netanyahu guy. I hate him. That guy seems like an evil guy to me, and I think he's seemed like that to most people now because of – I mean mostly I think it's just like nobody wants war or anything, and we're lucky to live in a place where Tennessee is not at war with – With Kentucky.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E566 Candace Owens
So there's not like the risk every day or night of things flying over, you know, the fence. But I've thought that that America is a kind of like a shell company. But maybe it's always just been that way. Like. That's the thing. Like, maybe it's always been that way. Maybe it isn't. I just would like to know what it is. Right. So then it's like you can operate within the reality of things. Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E566 Candace Owens
Do you, are there good dreams when you're pregnant? Like that's one thing, because you're kind of dreaming for two. I feel like, is it almost like being at the sphere or whatever? That's what I would wonder.
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E566 Candace Owens
Because but then also people say that, like, well, why do you think there's such a strong relationship between the two countries then?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E566 Candace Owens
And again, all countries are probably involved in them.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E566 Candace Owens
She's known for her conservative viewpoints, her many viral debates, and her own show, Candace, which you can find releasing every week. I'm grateful for her time. Today's guest is Candace Owen.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E566 Candace Owens
Yeah, I just can't learn at a fast rate. That's one of my biggest issues, I think. Speaking about Epstein, right? How do you... How do you know he's not just a Jewish guy who was doing – who was being perverted or whatever and that he was doing business? Like there's no real connection that he works for Israel though.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E566 Candace Owens
But what do we – but if that's the case, what is the cross relationship? Because, yeah, I mean I think the Middle East is historically a place that's not super chill. So that's probably what a lot of people would say is like, oh, well, you need an ally there, right?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E566 Candace Owens
I agree with that. That's exactly how I feel. But I do think that we're so fucked in the Middle East because we've started so much... You know, we've been... just as bad as any other country as about causing trouble in places, you know?
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E566 Candace Owens
But you can't blame that all on Israel, though, I don't think.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E566 Candace Owens
Right. Well, yeah, I think we've created so much carnage over there that now you have children who hate America. You have places that hate America. And the sad part I agree with you on is that, yeah –
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E566 Candace Owens
The human – regular American people are the ones that have to sign up for the military because they – either it's tradition in their family or they want to support their country or they don't have a choice because they're going to have to go to jail, different reasons. But they're the ones who have to actually go and die and be the pawns of – These sick governments. Right.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E566 Candace Owens
And I do think or the strategic governments like that's the thing. I don't know. Sometimes if things if the if the governments are if some of the international politics, I don't have an understanding of international politics. I mean, I have ways that I feel, but I don't have a strong information. Well, but I.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E566 Candace Owens
I do think that it's sad that it's the regular just voter that has to go and put their life on the line.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E566 Candace Owens
Yeah. Oh, that's cool. Yeah. Because you would think that the spirit would be able to come visit you before it showed up. Right. Because this is just kind of the physical inclination of a spirit. Right. Being alive on Earth. And so it would make sense that the spirit got to come and kind of loiter a little bit or visit friends that or visit like friends of whoever it was going to occupy.
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E566 Candace Owens
Pedophiles should have to get out there on the front lines, I think.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E566 Candace Owens
Well, I felt, yeah. I mean, I will say that I definitely felt like... Yeah, I felt like during like the past eight or ten years of mainstream media, yeah, like you were the one that got picked on. Like people where I was from were the ones that kind of felt like got picked on by late night hosts. You know, you were the only person that was left to make fun of was white men, right?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E566 Candace Owens
It was the only person. So it was just like all your fault. I hated that shit, you know, because I don't even identify with a lot of like your redneck or your maggots. Like I don't identify with any of it. don't tell me who I am also. Like I didn't like that shit.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E566 Candace Owens
Yeah, I mean, there's some stuff in there I should probably fact check or whatever, but I don't even know where to get started. But I do think there's a lot of news out there. We know it. Everything. It's too much. So much advertising attached to everything. It's confusing. You don't know who to trust. That could be changing for you. San, I want to tell you about Straight Arrow News.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E566 Candace Owens
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E566 Candace Owens
That's why I've been using Straight Arrow News. Straight Arrow News is a place that empowers you with unbiased, fact-based journalism that informs, educates, and inspires trust. So you have context to the stories that impact your life. Go to san.com slash Theo Vaughn to check it out. You can visit through the link in my description.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E566 Candace Owens
When you visit, you not only support me, you're also supporting a group of journalists who are raising the bar on news by delivering news without bias, filter or spin. Welcome back to trustworthy journalism. Just the information. Straight Arrow News, S-A-N dot com slash T-H-E-O-V-O-N. UFC 313 is this Saturday, March 8th at 10 p.m. Eastern Standard Time. It's exclusively on ESPN Plus pay-per-view.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E566 Candace Owens
The main event has UFC star Alex Chama Pereira defending his light heavyweight title against number one contender Magomed Ankalev. This will be Pereira's fourth title defense. Ankalayev is on an 11-fight unbeaten streak. He's on a heater, boys! In the co-main event, you got Justin Gaethje. Dan Hooker hurt his hand, so he's out. But they brought back in Mr. Rafael Fizaev.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E566 Candace Owens
It's a rematch between these two. It was a back-and-forth brawl last time. Gaethje ended up getting the win in that one. These guys between them have 30 finishes. in the octagon, so it's going to be a banger. This is all exclusively on ESPN Plus pay-per-view. You can buy now at ESPNPLUS.com slash PPV. That's ESPNPLUS.com slash PPV. So you connect a lot of dots between...
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E566 Candace Owens
like Israel and media, right? Or, but do you think that it's just capitalism? Like, don't you think a lot of times it's just like, it's just business and that's how business works is that they're, you know, like it's one of the side effects of capitalism.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E566 Candace Owens
In 1959, AZCPA was renamed APAC, American Israel Public Affairs Committee, reflecting a broader membership and mission.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E566 Candace Owens
Okay, American Zionist Council was opposed to a lobby in the United States founded in 1949. It represented nine nationwide Zionist organizations in matters related to specific— See at the bottom there?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E566 Candace Owens
In 1962, President John F. Kennedy and his brother Bobby, as a U.S. Attorney General, forced the AZC to register as a foreign agent. In doing so, they were barred from making monetary contributions to U.S. officials. Who was barred? AZC?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E566 Candace Owens
Yeah, I had a guest on recently, this guy, Ari Shafir, and we had the strongest Monday Days of the Week I'd ever had, and I almost was grabbed him, and I was like, you've been here.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E566 Candace Owens
The Foreign Agents Registration Act is a U.S. law that requires people in the entities working on behalf of foreign governments to register with the Department of Justice.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E566 Candace Owens
But wasn't the Russia story just – that was figured out to be a facade, right?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E566 Candace Owens
Well, it was like, I knew you. I was like, we've done this before, and I almost felt like he knew it, and he was like, like, this bastard is, this dude. I was like, tell me why you came before me.
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E566 Candace Owens
Right. If like America is owned by Israel or part ownership or whatever, just tell us that.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E566 Candace Owens
Yeah, a lot of times it's just like everybody's fighting over bullshit that doesn't super matter. It does matter, but really sometimes just like –
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E566 Candace Owens
select small groups we get these political kickballs that get kicked around back and forth and they're the biggest things in the whole world um blm and like the bathrooms like you know uh bathrooms like like i'm just saying i'm not saying that trans people don't need a place to urinate um everybody does but i'm just saying it seems like there's ways to figure it out i'm from a community where if somebody attacked a gay person or a trans person you would fuck those people up right like that's just where i'm from um
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E566 Candace Owens
But then people bring it. But then there's always some lurker, some little slurper running around in and out of there, putting on a bow tie or whatever. There's always some little frickin' sniff god running his nostril up in there trying to get a huff of something young, you know? And that's where it gets a little bit dicey, you know?
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E566 Candace Owens
Like at the airport sometimes when it's a unisex bathroom, you'll see like I've seen like a... a pair of young girls walk in and then a guy walk in, it seems not cool.
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E566 Candace Owens
Yeah. I'll use the family stall. I'll use the one at the airport and the secret wall just says family or whatever on it.
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E566 Candace Owens
Yeah. Sorry. Yeah. No, it's okay. It's fine. But obviously you like, you're, you're in a conspiracy theories.
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E566 Candace Owens
I think things start to feel super obvious to a lot of Americans that there's – it's just been – that we are being laundered, right?
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E566 Candace Owens
We are the things. Our – But then it gets to a personal level. It's like, do some people even really care? I know there's a part of people inside of their spirit that probably really cares for most people. But then it's like how do you uncompromise and unaddict yourself from the easy things to want to spurn yourself towards action, right? Well, let me say this.
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E566 Candace Owens
How do you keep like – because you got anti-Semite of the year or whatever, decade or whatever it was. But like – Because I don't like what Israel – like their space in Gaza, right? Like that to me just seems super tyrannical. But didn't they just come up with a thing today about the ICC? They can't prosecute Netanyahu?
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E566 Candace Owens
Right. And I wish they would just say, look, we're still letting everybody be gangsters because that's what I don't like about the media. A lot of times there's this thing.
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E566 Candace Owens
It's like we all need to look out for each other and we need like climate change and we need to make sure that everybody has a safe place to urinate and all those things, which, yeah, I think all those things are important or worth discussion. But at the same time, you'll have countries that are still playing this Fidel Castro type of role.
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E566 Candace Owens
So it's like, why do we keep saying all these little things are important, but you can just say, hey, we're still in colonial or we're still in the old school days and shit is what it is. So fucking mark off your fence yard and protect your fucking shit because that's what countries are doing. Like that's how they're operating, but they're trying to create ambiance that makes us feel like,
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E566 Candace Owens
No, you got to. Yeah, I think you go away from the house.
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E566 Candace Owens
we can't operate like that, or you're a bad person if you do operate like that.
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E566 Candace Owens
That's my thing. I just want to know what the rules are. If America is owned by China and Israel and Taiwan, just tell me that. Let me know. Because at a certain point, you know, if you keep, you know,
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E566 Candace Owens
Let me look at real politicking is the approach of conducting diplomatic or political policies based primarily on considerations of given circumstances and factors rather than strictly following ideological, moral or ethical premises.
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E566 Candace Owens
Or say, yeah, we're part, Israel is a, we are partners to the end and this is how it is. The problem is, I think you used to be able to do that, but the news decided to not be the news anymore. It decided to be-
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E566 Candace Owens
I'm never going to work again, but let's look at Operation Mockingbird.
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E566 Candace Owens
Operation Mockingbird is an alleged large-scale program at the United States Central Intelligence Agency that began in the early years of the Cold War and attempted to manipulate domestic American news media organizations for propaganda purposes. And where were they from?
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E566 Candace Owens
Oh, yeah. I didn't see. It's interesting that you would see Rugrats as like a like a psyop idea of like babies kind of like. coagulating and forming like a Lord of the Flies.
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E566 Candace Owens
Well, at least they casted a black Hitler this time.
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E566 Candace Owens
No, you're all right. I just need a break. This is too much for my brain today. But how do you keep like – How do you keep your Jewish friends but have issues with like Israel and stuff like that? How do you manage that?
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E566 Candace Owens
Oh, that diaper was thick, too. And I'll say this. This is a little girl on the right.
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E566 Candace Owens
Yeah, I would never do slaver, dude. I can barely, I have fucking three employees. I can barely handle these guys.
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E566 Candace Owens
Yeah. Well, I do think because there's also a lot of great things that I see like in like a lot of Jewish families. They value education. Right. They invest in their children. Those are like some of the things that they do super well. They work together. Right. Like a lot of Jewish guys that I know they'll connect you with another Jewish guy to work for.
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E566 Candace Owens
work with or something, you know, like they help their group, you know, and that's something I feel like other groups could learn how to do as well. You know, that's something that I think a lot of people.
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E566 Candace Owens
She looks like – and this guy is also a very handsome guy in this photo. She looks like Anthony Smith, who is one of the greatest UFC fighters. Bring up a photo of Anthony Smith as well on a separate – and I shouldn't say that because she's going to get upset.
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E566 Candace Owens
It's going pretty, I mean, it is, you know, what do you mean it's going good? It's set, set percent.
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E566 Candace Owens
Yeah, I mean, I think America just has, America is just, I mean, we still haven't even dealt with, I think, the trauma from like the Native Americans that were in our land. I think we still have a lot of like,
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E566 Candace Owens
do you think I know that lady scoffed at me when I fell out of that chair at the inauguration like I had fucking like I was a fart that had come out of her Oh, look at this gross. This thing from steerage that climbed up here somehow. This thing that would never get in a lifeboat on the Titanic.
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E566 Candace Owens
That kind of fucking... Yeah, when I fell out of that chair at the inauguration, that's what she was doing. What else do I want to ask you about? Okay, so you have... Let's get in. I can't even handle anything all serious right now. You have a conspiracy theory about Brigitte Macron, right? Or it's a conspiracy theory. And look, I was...
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E566 Candace Owens
we were one of the first podcasts that had Bobby Kennedy on because he's a friend of mine. Right. So he came on and he even said, dude, I don't know if I should be on. Right. And then fast forward three years later, five years later, and he is, um, and now those people were like, Bobby's the fucking man, you know? So I understand like,
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E566 Candace Owens
You know, conspiracy theories and also just being brave to have somebody on. Like I was like, some people might be afraid to have Candace Owens on. I was like, I want to be I don't want anybody telling me that I can or can't talk to somebody like that to me feels really good. Now, I'll admit, probably I'm not the best in this conversation of like some of the topics I probably get.
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E566 Candace Owens
You have a beautiful family. Um, are you able to take a vacation? Were you able to take any vacations recently or anything?
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E566 Candace Owens
scared or i don't know enough information right but that's always something that i kind of struggle with um and so sometimes i let things be said where it's like i don't fact check them but sometimes i just forget you know i'm not a fucking wizard either you know i i don't know what the fuck i'm doing so i work hard at it though you fucking better believe that people like you know what the fuck you're doing i'm like yeah but i'll be there every fucking day
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E566 Candace Owens
And you get creative and you get, you create like these timelines and stuff.
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E566 Candace Owens
Yeah, I was just curious. And what about cybersecurity? I noticed that you had this you have this Brigitte Macron, who is the wife of the president of France. His name is Emmanuel Macron. And one thing that's interesting about them is they have an age difference, right? How many years is it?
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E566 Candace Owens
Well, this is a story that's come up over the years like this is an alleged thing.
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E566 Candace Owens
But in 10 minutes, can you give me what is going on here?
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E566 Candace Owens
Okay, lives as a woman now. Yeah, I would have never thought that she was a man.
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E566 Candace Owens
Okay, so she was a woman when they met, you're saying?
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E566 Candace Owens
So wait, so they're 26-year age difference? My parents were 32 years age difference. So I can't really, you know.
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E566 Candace Owens
Well, now here, my parents didn't meet until my mom was 30.
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E566 Candace Owens
Look that – in a separate window, look that up and then bring it up. I'm going to see this. In 1993, age of 39, she met – Brigitte Macron met the 15-year-old Emmanuel Macron in La Providence High School.
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E566 Candace Owens
So one year is about 7% of his life though at that point. So it's a decent amount. And everything sounds romantic when you're reading all this stuff too. Where she was a teacher and was student and classmate of her daughter. Brigitte divorced Ozier in 2006 and married Macron in 2007. Wow. So they really fell into something.
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E566 Candace Owens
In December 2021, Natasha Ray and Amanda Roy broadcast unsubstantiated rumors online that Brigitte had never existed and that her brother Jean-Michel Chagnot had changed gender and started using that name. So what does this mean?
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E566 Candace Owens
But isn't it just love that they love? I mean, so the part you're saying that's so obtuse is the fact that you felt like they were groomed kind of.
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E566 Candace Owens
Because if somebody who is a man or woman falls in love with somebody else, that's okay. Yeah.
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E566 Candace Owens
Now, what age did they get married at? They didn't get married when he was a child.
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E566 Candace Owens
And so- But I could see somebody being like, oh, this is so problematic. But if I engage with it, it becomes even more problematic.
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E566 Candace Owens
I haven't, but you always hear about the Swiss Alps. Is this it? It's beautiful.
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E566 Candace Owens
Yeah, I can't tell if I think – if that happened, would you engage or would you not engage? What would you do there? Because it has to be – I mean it's such a murder mystery kind of thing, you know, like a – The series is fun. God, it's very – and since it's French, they have all the stuff you can't pronounce that good.
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E566 Candace Owens
But now you had a series that also was about – it was about Kamala Harris's genealogy. How did that end? Because the theory was what?
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E566 Candace Owens
Yeah. Thank you. That would be awesome. Candace Owens investigates Kamala Harris' claims about her black heritage, particularly focusing on a photograph Harris shared in her book where she posed with a woman Harris said was her grandmother.
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E566 Candace Owens
Oh yeah, black people can tell if you're not black.
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E566 Candace Owens
Except for Mac McClung who won three slam dunk titles in a row, dude. Who did? So Mac McClung. And he's the slam dunk champion. He's won the three dunk competitions in a row in the NBA.
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E566 Candace Owens
I'm just saying. Usually you can tell if a guy's...
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E566 Candace Owens
cultural appropriating or not right but this dude is just he just has it is he black nope oh i thought you were saying he's actually black i was like you could be drinking black blood or something i have no idea he's obviously he's obviously drinking black blood i think we can go ahead and say that right he's got more bunnies in the zoo dude that guy is just crazy um okay but go back so
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E566 Candace Owens
So what were the fun? What was the final founding on that? Did you come to a conclusion?
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E566 Candace Owens
Yeah, I wonder how I feel about it. Speaking of those villages, actually, yeah, I haven't been there, but my friend, when I was a kid, he won his family football pool or whatever for the NCAA football, like whenever they have the bowl games. And his mom coerced him into buying a Switzerland village or whatever that they could put on their table at home. So he came into some money.
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E566 Candace Owens
That's what you're saying. And it's tough because you don't you can't see if somebody I mean, I guess they should have like a black database or something. But I don't know how much would that cost us?
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E566 Candace Owens
Yeah. And maybe as a, as a black person, you do just know. And these are series, right? You have one about Kamala, one about Brigitte.
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E566 Candace Owens
Harvey Weinstein files. And did he, somebody said that he emailed you from prison or something?
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E566 Candace Owens
He was kind of like the closer over there, the Seriano or whatever.
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E566 Candace Owens
Oh, I checked my penis in the hospice, I remember. It was just a tough time for guys. Yeah, you were afraid to shake dude's hands. I remember that. You were afraid to even be, like, it was scary. And you would try to speak up for friends that you didn't think did something or that you did. And then, like, you would just be bastardized online.
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E566 Candace Owens
Like, I remember there was, like, famous, like, celebrities online. who would like tag me and other friends in tweets and be like, they knew everything, just shit. Like, what are you fucking, we do not know, you know, just, but crazy shit.
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E566 Candace Owens
I think the Me Too, I think it was definitely got, everything goes overboard, right?
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E566 Candace Owens
He came in, it was almost like, I think it was like $1,100,000. He came into some money, and so then, dude, like two weeks later, we're like, dude, what are you going to do with the money? And he had a freaking Christmas village at his house. Like a dollhouse. Or just like, you know those villages people get, and it's like Switzerland? And his was Switzerland, but he was furious about it.
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E566 Candace Owens
And so, you know, some of these- And is a lot of this stuff public domain?
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E566 Candace Owens
I will say this. I was afraid to bring, uh, female comics on the road because it was spooky. Yeah. And you'd be like, well, what if one wrong joke? Right. What if I look at them a certain way? I mean, I'm in, I'm in like, um, we just did a movie, a friend of mine and I just self-funded our own film and put it together and everything. And so, uh, we just got done doing it. And I was like, uh,
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E566 Candace Owens
On set, I was like, oh, I got to be, can't joke around, got to be careful what you're saying. Or I would yell out, that's a joke, right? If I said something that I thought might be obtuse, you know?
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E566 Candace Owens
Anyway, I don't know why I told you that story, but that sounds like a beautiful trip. I would like to go to Switzerland. I'll spend a little bit of time in France, and then I was in London recently and actually really enjoyed it.
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E566 Candace Owens
When I was young, yeah, you give a girl a chocolate or something. Take a girl out for a fish filet or whatever.
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E566 Candace Owens
Oh, no, like a real one or whatever. Dude, my mommy's ordered the fish fillet. She would fucking.
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E566 Candace Owens
Me. I do a double hamburger, which isn't on the menu, but you can get it.
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E566 Candace Owens
No, I don't know who's making it back there. It depends. If Big Mac himself is back there, I'll take a couple ounces.
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E566 Candace Owens
Yeah. It's kind of sad, though, but I'll tell you this. I used to get two milks with it.
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E566 Candace Owens
See me in the streets. You don't know me. I'm the T.I. of fucking Mickey D's orders, baby. Look at that little milk jug right there. And that's what he used to call my sister, little milk jug.
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E566 Candace Owens
You can't order more than two. That's the crazy thing. What? Yeah. That's 11.
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E566 Candace Owens
We right here. I'm just saying we get it how we live.
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E566 Candace Owens
I hadn't enjoyed it as much before, but I think this time I noticed that the people over there, they seem to have like – or at least the women. Some of the women over there are more – or maybe this is – I don't want to say women. But there's more going on than just like –
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E566 Candace Owens
Oh, double milk jug, baby. Give me two of them. And the lady be like, you really want to? I'll be like, yeah. And then we would laugh a little bit. I'd tip her. But yeah, that's how I like mine. Like that double milk jug. I used to get an apple pie, but I just, I don't want all that sugar anymore. But my mother, I forgot to tell you this.
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E566 Candace Owens
My mother, she would let us order. And then she would, she'd be like, she would order the McFish or whatever. But it would almost be like she was ordering like a special, like, she'd be like, they'll have this and this and this. What do you want? She'd be like, and I'll have the McFish. It was almost like it was like.
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E566 Candace Owens
Yeah, like quiet down. Let me do business here with this person.
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E566 Candace Owens
Of course. I've never looked at an ocean and at a McDonald's and be like, yeah, these things should know each other. That is so fucking... There is not a yellow brick road that connects those bitches. But so it always blew. And she would look at us as if she was disappointed. Like that's my mother would scoff. So I'm like, you motherfuckers don't know about a McFish.
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E566 Candace Owens
That's what I heard. Who's doing it first? Shake Shack.
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E566 Candace Owens
No, but I say go door to door if you're Steak and Shake. I don't even, I used to sell door to door Italian with this guy for a little bit. Do you think that mainstream media has an overall goal or has had an overall goal besides just capitalism? Do you really think that?
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E566 Candace Owens
Oh, I see. Instead of just admitting it publicly one way, they would rather lose it and then go back to it.
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E566 Candace Owens
Fox Corporation today announces Echoes in a Red Seat Ventures, a leading business in the creator economy that powers talent across a range of genres as they build their direct-to-consumer media business. Does it say what talent it works with, though?
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E566 Candace Owens
Chris Balfe and Kevin Balfe, I'm assuming brothers or husbands. Yeah.
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E566 Candace Owens
It could not be right, but that will tell you that like you're... It was just me at there.
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E566 Candace Owens
Uh, you'll bring O'Reilly, Kelly and Carlson back into Murdoch's fold.
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E566 Candace Owens
Well, I do think it's interesting that some political areas have – some shows have become more – have slowly tried to slurp on more of a conservative side. Like Bill Maher did that well over the past four or five years. You started to see him like – he recognized like – Where the wind was blowing. Yeah, he was able to see it ahead. Do you think America is a place that everybody is just here –
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E566 Candace Owens
And you can be here and be not even supporting America. That's what's interesting to me about America. That's what I start to recognize. Like, oh, well, some people are here, but they don't they're not America first. Right. Or they may not be. Do you think America's always kind of been that? And that's what it is. It's kind of this halfway house for everywhere of like of the whole planet.
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E566 Candace Owens
Or do you feel like it's this other like you have to buy into this, you know, red, white and blue stars and stripes?
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E566 Candace Owens
And the American flag became this right wing symbol, which I was like- It was like, what's happening? But it was like, doesn't anybody see that? Like, don't you notice like- I wish there were more parties. I don't think there's enough parties that – I think you can't pigeonhole people into Republican or Democrat most of the time. I don't think you'd ever be able to pigeonhole me that way.
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E566 Candace Owens
I think there should be more political parties so we feel like you can find one that fits you. Mm-hmm. Because it's just this dirty Cinderella where neither one of these fucking clogs is really helping me get down the stairs anymore, it feels like, you know?
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E566 Candace Owens
Well, I'm not going to tell you that. You're obviously a taken woman. Are you hot or cold, do you feel like?
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E566 Candace Owens
Yeah, it's called Nashville. But I will say this. I think, yeah, if you have an idea, right, that you think, well, we have to get rid of this group of people or these people, that is never going to be America, right? America is always, I mean, like, when it comes to like races and ethnicities, right? It's all, it's just, it's going to be a melting pot, right?
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E566 Candace Owens
So you always have to think with the goal at the end is that everybody's going to be here.
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E566 Candace Owens
But then people say you have the freedom to think and feel whatever you want.
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E566 Candace Owens
Yeah, I do think it would be. But then it's like, how do you get into that without communism? Yeah.
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E566 Candace Owens
Oh, I agree. I agree. It's like America gets held in the media like, you know, like be welcoming and do this and do that. But then meanwhile, other countries get to be have followed their letter to the law. And we're held by our own media a lot of times to this ridiculous standards. Why don't we have a letter to our law?
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E566 Candace Owens
We should all at least have the common ground that America is first, whether we like some things about it or don't like some things about it. Because if not, it feels like you're just one of the ops.
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E566 Candace Owens
Well, you may not want that person making the law, but they're welcome to be in their house and think and feel however they want.
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E566 Candace Owens
That's how I feel. It does. Oh shit. And it's just a dude that shows up and it's like, he doesn't have any specific powers like any of the other superheroes. He's just like more like exciting. He's like, oh shit, there's fascinator Randy or whatever. Dude. That's a fascinator. Oh, that's a female hat.
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E566 Candace Owens
I mean, then that goes to a question. Do you think America is a Christian nation? Do you think it or do you think it's more of a moral nation? And do you think that that's eroding? I mean, I think some of that could be a whole nother conversation, probably.
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E566 Candace Owens
I fucking – I'm going to miss this taxi I ordered in a little bit. I don't know if I can handle all that, dude.
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E566 Candace Owens
Yeah, you know, I do think that I do – like there was something nice about having structure in the schools, but then a lot of that got challenged. Yeah, I think it is. Like I think America does need to figure out, well, what is our footprint? You know, like who are we – what do we want to stand up for and believe in and believe these are the things that define our country?
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E566 Candace Owens
Well, Hollywood is, you know, it's celebrity. It has those things that are addictive, you know?
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E566 Candace Owens
Well, Hollywood gets pinpointed a lot because it's the glossy thing too.
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E566 Candace Owens
Yeah, somebody look like a damn doe or something. That's me.
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E566 Candace Owens
You look like somebody put a couple of eyes in a. Like caring after yourself. In a pizza dough or whatever.
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E566 Candace Owens
Now, that's. Dude, I'll say this. I seen a girl. Right. Her lips look like they were getting ready to be like they'd been in a burn. Like just like inflated to probably six. Maybe 50. 14 PSI or whatever. And it's like, what are we fucking doing? And if you kiss somebody like that, it feels insane. And then they put all that glossner on them.
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E566 Candace Owens
Is it like weird? Well, yeah, it's weird, but then they trampoline, they polish them up with that glossner. No, it's like, it's almost like you're sucking on something. It's almost like a shrimp that won't fucking give up. That's what it's like. It's like trying to eat two shrimps that won't give up. Anyway, there's probably more we can talk about.
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E566 Candace Owens
Yeah, I do want to say a Jewish friend of mine set this up in case anybody gets...
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E566 Candace Owens
I appreciate you coming on and talking. I'm excited to hear about the Weinstein thing. Good luck with the presidency. Will you homeschool your children? Will you find schools for them? What are you doing?
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E566 Candace Owens
No way. Who's going to do the professoring, though?
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E566 Candace Owens
A lot of the inventors and creators now have, and I think a lot of people would say that they possibly have some type of autism, right? A little bit of it, right? And I think that's not debated by a lot of them.
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E566 Candace Owens
That's pretty normal. But a lot of autistic people, they are good with concepts, right? But they're not as good a lot of times with emotions, right? Not in the practical way that people without autism seem to be. Mm-hmm. So that's what I'm saying. We're getting more products that are created that have less emotion in them and are more just practical. Right.
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E566 Candace Owens
Because that's the type of people that the creativity is going through.
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E566 Candace Owens
Yeah, you don't want to be at the club and you're just grinding up on some electronic womb in the corner.
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E566 Candace Owens
No, baby, do what you do. That song comes on and people are just grinding up against like some electric wound where you have to put a quarter in it or whatever to get to shake.
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E566 Candace Owens
Press one. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, yeah, it's, I don't know. It's fascinating. Candace Owens, thanks for your time. Congrats on this. When are we going to see this baby?
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E566 Candace Owens
Not really, but... Yeah, sorry, it's Ides of March.
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E566 Candace Owens
Yeah. Oh, it could be Latino, huh? If you and a white man had a Mexican baby, dude, that's AI. Best of luck.
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E566 Candace Owens
Oh, yeah. They look a little bit more gift-wrapped over there.
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E566 Candace Owens
Whereas here, if it's hats and gloves, it's burglary usually, I feel like.
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E566 Candace Owens
We have so many burglars now, there should be a contest, I feel like. We've definitely come a long way from the Beagle Boys. Bring those guys up from DuckTales. Those guys were horribly dressed.
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E566 Candace Owens
We had to. This was our babysitter. I was like, Mom, do we have a babysitter? She's like, yeah, the Beagle Boys. Don't you watch Duck Tales every day? I'm like, that's a television program.
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E566 Candace Owens
I was going to ask because you're pregnant. Are you hot or cold?
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E566 Candace Owens
We also ended up marrying a white guy, too. So I think that all checks out.
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E566 Candace Owens
Yeah. People always say he looks like Macklemore a little bit, too.
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E566 Candace Owens
Yeah, yeah. You'll be like, no, it was exactly like this and then it wasn't.
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E566 Candace Owens
Like, yeah, that's the big one. People talk about a lot.
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E566 Candace Owens
Remember many people. Let me see. The Mandela effect is when a group of people misremember something such as a brand name or event. Some examples include many people remember.
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E566 Candace Owens
Okay. was there describe his tail pikachu short uh let me think of him yeah oh god he's nasty uh he had short little tail kind of like a um just like a little triangle like a isosceles triangle kind of coming off but what color was it his tail was yellow you don't remember anything on it Maybe it had a little ball at the end or something, like a little black ball at the end.
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E566 Candace Owens
Oh, yes, I've heard that. My friend Neil Brennan is a comedian. He has a bunch of jokes about that.
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E566 Candace Owens
Well, I wouldn't be – it's like – It feels like that a lot of times. And we get so like compromised in our brains because we only have so much bandwidth, right? Like we think we have this immense amount of bandwidth, but we really don't. And so it's like once your like files are kind of filled, it's like that's all you have.
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E566 Candace Owens
Yeah, I think that doesn't help, you know. Candace Owens, thanks for hanging out with me today. I appreciate it. It's nice to see you.
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E566 Candace Owens
Yeah. I think you're like such a brave. You're like veracity. You're like fearless, you know, and you're like you're fear. I don't think anybody couldn't say those things about you. Do you ever like get worried for your own safety or anything these days? Does that happen to me?
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#573 - Morgan Wallen
I have some tour dates to tell you about. The Return of the Rat tour is finishing up and it's coming to Oxford, Mississippi on April 9th, Tuscaloosa, Alabama, Chicago, Illinois, Miami, Florida, Winnipeg, and Calgary in the Canada. You can get all your tickets at theovon.com slash T-O-U-R. And thank you guys so much for your support. We've got new merch. We've got these Onward hoodies.
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#573 - Morgan Wallen
Damn, dude. No, it's just interesting to hear you say that. I had a guy a few years ago. I had taken out a guy. We went to lunch, and he's married, and we're both straight. But we went and had lunch together. Thanks for clarifying, man. But, yeah, he's been like a manager of some of the most popular comedians over time. And I was talking to him.
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#573 - Morgan Wallen
He goes, well, you kind of have to evolve with your audience. He's like, going back to kind of what you said earlier about some people probably present songs to you. that would have been great an album or two ago. It's like, damn, that would have been... But it's like you evolved.
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#573 - Morgan Wallen
Yeah, dude, good to see you, bro. Good to see you, too, man. Yeah, it's awesome, man. What's been going on? Yeah, my mom was visiting for my birthday. We went to the Opry. You did? Yeah.
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#573 - Morgan Wallen
Yeah, and they only have like the footprints that they've seen you so far make that they can even judge on.
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#573 - Morgan Wallen
This man at one time, he said, he goes, one thing you have to evolve with your audience if you try to hide that you're evolving or that you're growing because your audience also grows, right? Oh, yeah. So he's like, if you try, it can be a trap sometimes to try to just fit your current feet back into your old footprints. And I just thought it was interesting to hear somebody say that.
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#573 - Morgan Wallen
I'd never really thought about because sometimes you're like, oh, this worked and I got to stay right here. But you're not there anymore, you know?
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#573 - Morgan Wallen
And I mean, even if it's just subtle changes, it don't have to be like huge things, you know? Yeah. You don't have to come out and do like a Mozart style.
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#573 - Morgan Wallen
Do you feel like you've always had a pretty good, like, instinct about that kind of stuff? Like, is that something that you think you really have? Like, you kind of can feel?
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#573 - Morgan Wallen
It was cool, dude. Trace Adkins. Did she come up here a lot or no? No, she hadn't been here since I moved here.
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#573 - Morgan Wallen
fully just I think I had a knack for it already but I think I've you know developed it and learned from people as well so yeah I've always had a tough time like cause I've always been like a do it yourself kind of guy like I feel like I know what I'm doing like I work hard but then recently I've had to like realize I need help more. It's like, I can't always give this guy a hard time.
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#573 - Morgan Wallen
I need, I need to see, you know what I'm saying? Like I can't always butt up against every wall, you know, cause I'll just do that. It's just my nature. Cause I don't want help a lot of times. Yeah. Yeah, man.
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#573 - Morgan Wallen
Yeah. It's been getting better though recently. Yeah. Even just like just little things. I just started noticing it's getting a little bit better and it's, and the irony is everything's been easier.
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#573 - Morgan Wallen
Yeah, thanks, man. When is your birthday? Two days ago, March 19th. Okay, cool.
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#573 - Morgan Wallen
Yeah, I'm proud of it. That's the best part. Is it tough in your life? I mean, dude, your music, it's like... it's just been such a way that like, I mean, you couldn't travel around town without seeing every guy at a stoplight look like, you know, look like a Morgan Wallen, look like a, like a, hear your music everywhere, every store.
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#573 - Morgan Wallen
Like, are there moments for you where it's like, God, this guy's got it. Like, it's like, where it almost, where you become too much for you. Like, is that ever, you don't, does that make any sense?
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#573 - Morgan Wallen
Yeah. It's kind of funny. You can't really go to a bar anymore because there'd be too much hassle, and it's probably the best thing for you. It's definitely the best thing for me.
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#573 - Morgan Wallen
yeah yeah dude your dad's so funny dude yeah he's the man he's unreal dude because we went on what was um we went with uh is it morgan wallen the foundation morgan foundation yeah yeah yeah yeah up there to greenville area yeah yeah during the flood stuff during hurricane helene yeah and your dad came and um it was awesome man they had the food truck that you know they were doing food drives and um i met some people up there when visited the houses and stuff that was awesome
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#573 - Morgan Wallen
How is that? That feels like a bar right there. It does.
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#573 - Morgan Wallen
Dude, have you seen those? There's an AI thing that makes country songs. There's one about a bar. See if you can pull it up, Trevin. Is it good? Dude, it's pretty funny. Let me see. This shit kind of surprised me. Oh, it's the right one. Kitchen. And the second one right there with the guy and the lady in the truck. Yeah. Turn that up for a second. It's just ridiculous.
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#573 - Morgan Wallen
Hey, start it back over and just turn it up a little bit. We can't hear it, but this is just like AI made this.
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#573 - Morgan Wallen
That's good, man. But it's just crazy that AI wrote that. Like, it's just somebody just put it in.
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#573 - Morgan Wallen
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#573 - Morgan Wallen
Track your picks for a shot to win huge cash prizes. It's as simple as that. Yeah, I just put some picks in for the Florida Gators the other day. I had Alex Condon and more than seven rebounds. And I had Walter Clayton Jr. and more than 14 and a half points. Download the DraftKings Pick 6 app now and use code Theo. That's code T-H-E-O for new customers to play $5, get $50 in Pick 6 credits.
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#573 - Morgan Wallen
Better payouts, bigger wins, only with Pick 6 from DraftKings. The crown is yours.
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#573 - Morgan Wallen
You've heard me talk about the MoonPay app. And for good reason. It's incredibly user-friendly for buying and selling crypto. But today I want to share more about what makes MoonPay so great. Some people say that MoonPay is the PayPal of crypto. Because just like you could use PayPal to buy anything on the internet, you can now use MoonPay to buy anything in crypto.
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#573 - Morgan Wallen
Speaking of cool crypto apps, check out Vector, one of MoonPay's partners that is shaking things up in the meme coin world. With Vector, you can connect your X account and see what your friends are trading, making it a social experience. You can download Vector using code Theo and buy with MoonPay.
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#573 - Morgan Wallen
Remember, while MoonPay makes buying crypto straightforward, it's important to do your own research and understand the risks involved. Crypto trading can be unpredictable and you could lose your investment. MoonPay is a tool to facilitate your transactions, not a source of financial advice. Trade responsibly. Y'all been praying and manifesting, and now the day has come to Call of Duty Warzone.
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#573 - Morgan Wallen
Verdansk is back, baby. That's right, the OG map, the one that raised you, the one where you took your first baby steps, is making its return on April 3rd. Relive the chaotic, heart-pounding moments from the original Verdansk. Verdansk. Experience legendary gunfights with classic weaponry. It's free to play. Freer than a hot dog at a homeless shelter, baby. You can get it. So rally the squad.
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#573 - Morgan Wallen
I guess we could, but... Well, I think that's why, I mean, you have a foundation that can do it when you're not able to do it. For sure. But yeah, I agree with you.
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#573 - Morgan Wallen
Tell your boss you've got important business that day. And get ready to drop in. Download Call of Duty Warzone for free and drop into Vedansk on April 3rd. Oh, and this is rated M for mature. So don't go blaming me if your little nephews or nieces log on and learn some new words. You know what I'm talking about. Bad words. What are you listening to right now, man? I know everybody asks that.
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#573 - Morgan Wallen
Kind of same, man. That's kind of when I do it. Yeah. Stephen Wilson I've been listening to. Yeah, he's good. He's really good. He's a great lyricist. Yeah, yeah. He's a special talent. That song about my father's son, Hardy played that one with him. God, it's good.
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#573 - Morgan Wallen
Jesse Murph, Big X The Plug, you've heard that song? Uh-uh.
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#573 - Morgan Wallen
They have a collab that's pretty dope. That's cool. Yeah, it's good.
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#573 - Morgan Wallen
Miami, Miami, what took you so long? I thought you'd never call.
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#573 - Morgan Wallen
You're famous. You guys had these different walkouts that you did over the years, right? Really fun. And thanks for letting me be part of the one in Nashville. Yeah, yeah. Do you have a favorite one that kind of stood out to you? And no judgment to any of them. What was it? I mean...
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#573 - Morgan Wallen
Yeah, and Tony Vitello, is that his name? Mm-hmm.
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#573 - Morgan Wallen
Oh, he's thugging. He's big thugging right there. He was, dude. Um... What else has happened? So the first time you're going to play your new album will be at Sand In My Boots Fest? I'll play some of my album there.
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#573 - Morgan Wallen
That gets real tricky. Do you do that yourself? You kind of organize it?
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#573 - Morgan Wallen
You got to keep it within reason. We got to meet in the middle, guys. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'll do my best.
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#573 - Morgan Wallen
You put it on, man. My show, I'll be out there for maybe about an hour, and 15 minutes is probably the sweet spot for me to be on stage, I think, with a comedian where they're just... Because we don't have any backup instruments, so people are like, fuck, somebody tap in a violin or something with this bastard. People get a little bit tired of it. But I can't... And that burns me out, man.
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#573 - Morgan Wallen
I used to do two shows, and now I only do one a night.
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#573 - Morgan Wallen
Yeah. When you first started as a... I think I remember you telling me that. Yeah, I think, like, even whenever I first came to town, you guys came one night and saw me over at Zany's, man. Yeah, yeah. That was cool. And you came and did my podcast early, man, and that helped me... It helped give me some...
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#573 - Morgan Wallen
You and me are tied right now. I think we're in first. Yeah, we are. I saw that. I checked this morning. Dude, yeah, one thing that was crazy about your dad, though, he was fasting. Whenever we're doing that, he'd been on a 40-day fast.
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#573 - Morgan Wallen
That doesn't sound like fast. That sounds like hiding from your wife.
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#573 - Morgan Wallen
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#573 - Morgan Wallen
Yeah, a team of researchers from MSK has shown for the first time that fasting can reprogram the metabolism of natural killer cells, helping them to survive in the harsh environment in and around tumors while improving their cancer-fighting ability. But it just blew my mind. I was like, God, this dude's on 40 days. Put this dude back in the Bible. Yeah.
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#573 - Morgan Wallen
a la in w. P. P. P. P. P. P. P. P. P. P. P. P. P. P. P. P. P. P. P. P. P. P. P.. P. P. P. P. P. P. P. P. P. P. P. P. P. P. P. P. P. P. P. P. P. P. P. P. P. P. P. P. P. P. P. P. P.
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#573 - Morgan Wallen
He loves it, man. Yeah, so... Yeah, he's talented, but he's hilarious, dude.
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#573 - Morgan Wallen
These are my favorite type of hoodie that we've ever used, the template, the material, the style of it. I think they'll be your favorite as well. We're going to try to focus on making sure that the template is perfect so that it just feels good and that you enjoy it and that you keep it and wear it for a long time. Yeah, those are really great. I want you to check them out.
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#573 - Morgan Wallen
Bro, he's just such a good story. Yeah, bro, getting to know him has been a gift, man.
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#573 - Morgan Wallen
he's entertaining yeah man he's just entertaining he's easy to be around and yeah that feeling stream job with him is perfect and he could do both he could have that job and do you know that could almost or find a way to put them together but you couldn't say and it could be a part of the same thing you couldn't find a guy that's more perfect for that um has there been something nice that you kind of got yourself as a gift that you started you know feeling like you were doing pretty well and um i mean a trip you took or anything
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#573 - Morgan Wallen
Yeah, same. I don't like going to get stuff. I don't like shopping for stuff, too.
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#573 - Morgan Wallen
What, what was your first car? Do you remember it? Yeah, it was a Jeep Cherokee. Was it really, dude? I got a freaking Jeep Cherokee, dude. You do right now? Yeah, and Los Angeles have a car there that's got like only 12,000 miles on it.
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#573 - Morgan Wallen
If they'll even allow you. Sometimes Google won't let you look at them anymore. Them bitches are visually outlawed. Bro, that shit will cross. It'll remodel your eyeline when you look at that bitch, dude. God damn, that bitch looks horrible. I haven't looked at it in a few years.
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#573 - Morgan Wallen
Really? Yeah. Was it only a two-seater anyway? No, it had three extra little seats in the back. Oh, okay, okay. But they weren't even a bench. It was three individual little bitty seats. Three booster seats right there? You either had to have three kids that were triplets, I guess, or a couple small buddies. But somebody had stole my damn passenger seat, dude. Did you ever get it back? Uh-uh.
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#573 - Morgan Wallen
Somebody were eating at a Burger King, and somebody stole that bitch out of there. But then people had to get in. They'd get in the car, but they couldn't sit right there. Yeah. Did you put a couple blankets down or something or what? I don't know. Whatever, dude. But the one time I picked up a dude, I was getting him to buy me alcohol at a gas station. I was skipping school.
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#573 - Morgan Wallen
And he got in, this kind of homeless-y kind of guy. And he got in, and instead of sitting in the back, he just got on his knees right there at the passenger side. So I'm driving, and he just— He was your friend? I didn't know him, no. He's like a guy who I gave money to buy me alcohol. Oh, okay. But anyway, I don't know why I'm telling you all this. I just cleaned out my car. Actually, I did not.
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#573 - Morgan Wallen
That's not true. I just—I'm going to clean it out, though. I am going to clean it out. This year for sure. Look, what I'm talking about is spring cleaning, and it's time to clean it all up. That's where Manscaped's beard and balls bundle comes in. You've spent all winter looking like a Louisiana swamp possum. Who just went through a bad divorce, baby. It's time to tighten up, chief.
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#573 - Morgan Wallen
He's got some bandwidth on him, man. Yeah, he's a pretty strong-willed guy. He's always so chipper, dude. Yeah, I'd love to get to hang out with him. And he tells stories from being in the military and stuff. Some of that stuff is bonkers.
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#573 - Morgan Wallen
Nothing says, I'm back, baby. Like just catering around your balls, baby. Grab the beard and balls bundle from Manscaped and get yourself right. They have all-in-one grooming with the beard hedger. Customizable trimming with 20 adjustable settings. Don't cut corners on your grooming routine. Upgrade to the beard and balls bundle from Manscaped.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#573 - Morgan Wallen
Visit manscaped.com and use code THEO to get 20% off plus free shipping. Or if you need it today, you can find Manscaped at a store near you. Stay fresh this season for everyone's sake. Level up your grooming game today.
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#573 - Morgan Wallen
Let me tell you something chaotic that happened one time with podcast and we jelly roll was here and we hadn't charged the batteries for the audio recorders and they gave up halfway through it. And so, yeah, we lost about half of an episode there. But life in general can be chaotic. You know that. especially if you're in charge of order fulfillment from an e-commerce business.
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#573 - Morgan Wallen
You know that's its own special kind of chaos. But with ShipStation, you can count on your day-to-day remaining calm. You never need to upgrade. ShipStation grows with your business, no matter how big it gets. It's the fastest, most affordable way to ship products to your customers with discounts up to 88% off. Wow. Calm the chaos of order fulfillment with the shipping software that delivers.
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#573 - Morgan Wallen
Switch to ShipStation today. Go to ShipStation.com and use code Theo to sign up for your free trial. That's ShipStation.com, code Theo. Today's episode is brought to you by BetterHelp. Let's talk about numbers, shall we? Traditional in-person therapy can cost anywhere from $100 to $250 per session, which adds up fast.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#573 - Morgan Wallen
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#573 - Morgan Wallen
Dude, that's the crazy part. You start talking to him, you're like, oh, well, some of this checks out. For sure it checks out. We don't need a DNA test in this family. But you said they're moving down here?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#573 - Morgan Wallen
With over 30,000 therapists, BetterHelp is the world's largest online therapy platform, having served over 5 million people globally. Your well-being is worth it. Visit BetterHelp.com slash T-H-E-O to get 10% off your first month. That's BetterHelp, H-E-L-P dot com slash Theo. So you got the new album coming out. Does it feel, is there a moment where you feel that the album is finished?
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#573 - Morgan Wallen
Is there a moment where you're like, I just can't, this is far enough? Could you keep going on and out? And could you keep fine tuning it forever? Yes, for sure. Yeah. So that's a real possibility. You can overdo it?
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#573 - Morgan Wallen
That would be pretty sick, dude. Yeah, dude, if you had house music.
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#573 - Morgan Wallen
I don't know. It might actually happen. Putting out something secret, low key.
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#573 - Morgan Wallen
Creating something. Yeah. Well, I bet. Cause that's an interesting thing. It's like, once you kind of have made a name in one space, it's kind of hard. You can't, you know, you almost have, if you want to get a real test of what people think of something, you kind of have to secretly do it some other way.
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#573 - Morgan Wallen
Dude, I've thought this, I thought, started thinking of this about two years ago. So they have like ED, you go to these nightclubs and stuff and they'll have like John Summit, these different kinds of guys who are playing like house, like trance or whatever, whatever it is. It's just people doing dope really late at night and just doing like this, you know, whatever that is.
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#573 - Morgan Wallen
I know there's sub genres and all that, but yeah. Same.
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#573 - Morgan Wallen
I don't have a clue, but I'm always like, why don't they have a, like a more like country or like, why is it always like if they had remixes of a lot of great country music, like, um, that, and you put it to that same type of shit that, cause a lot of people want to still go have that environment, but I don't, sometimes you get tired of that music. It just gets kind of old.
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#573 - Morgan Wallen
So if they had remixes of some dope country shit, um,
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#573 - Morgan Wallen
I'm like if they had two country DJs that came out I feel like it would be so sick just doing remixes and shit it would be cool I'm surprised they don't have that already me too me and Kayla Presley thought about trying to do it but then it was just like you just don't have a lot of time you know and that becomes something too it's like there's things you want to do and you just don't have enough time you know yeah and that's smart for you to realize that I mean it would be like well I'm going to quit my job pays all my bills and you know go be a mason it's like well maybe don't do that so yeah
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#573 - Morgan Wallen
Yeah, that's a lot, man. Is it, I know you have a son, Indio. Indio.
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#573 - Morgan Wallen
Just fucking remixing fucking Brooks and Dunn. Before you go, man, you have some amazing artists that are going to be on some of these tour dates with you.
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#573 - Morgan Wallen
Did you have to call them individually and ask them? How'd that kind of go? Because some of these are idols, really, in the industry.
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#573 - Morgan Wallen
Indy, right. What's that been like, dude? Because that's been probably one of the biggest things in your life, I'm sure. I mean, outside of your, I mean, like, yeah, that's crazy.
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#573 - Morgan Wallen
Miranda Ella Langley, she's a new. Yeah, she's a badass. Or she's newly more popular. Yeah. I'm not going to say she's new. I don't know about her history. I don't either. Miranda Corey Kent, I'm not familiar with him, if it's a man. It is, yeah. He's good, too. I'm going to have to check him out.
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#573 - Morgan Wallen
He's walking like, I see he'll eat a fucking, he'll eat a damn three-pack. I saw him eat a three-pack of beers. He probably did. Oh, he'll eat fucking two beers, dude. Yeah, he doesn't give a damn, dude. He played offensive line for Bud Light for a couple years, I think.
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#573 - Morgan Wallen
I got to tap in more with him. I saw him play with Kid Rock in one of his shows last year. Dude, I'll say this. Bob Ritchie. His live performance, dude? No, he'll let them have it, won't he? Bro, I was fucking... I mean, I know, you know, but I didn't... It was good, bro. I've never seen it firsthand, but I can imagine. I mean, I knew it would be, but it's just been some time, you know?
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#573 - Morgan Wallen
It's hard to keep up, you know? I mean, being out there for two hours, I mean, you guys get... I mean, it's a lot, man.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#573 - Morgan Wallen
Yeah, you're up. People are visiting. You got to say bye to everybody. All that shit. Well, I don't do all that anymore much.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#573 - Morgan Wallen
Yeah. Yeah. It's kind of interesting when I was a little younger, I could do those, I could do, you know, some of those stretches. And now I'm like, I don't, I wish I, when I do see them on the schedule, it's a little bit tougher, not comparing comedy and what, you know.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#573 - Morgan Wallen
It's like a regimen. It's like, yeah, I got to sleep in late. And it's like, well, that kind of sucks. Cause now it's like, it's kind of hard if you wake up at 10 to go back to sleep for two more hours, just cause it's light out. It's really hard. It's hard, but you know, you need that two more hours of sleep.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#573 - Morgan Wallen
Otherwise I'm going to be edgy, you know, and I won't be able to, man, I might not want to go work out just all the little things like. Yeah, it is. It's important. Because it's just about getting yourself back on the stage for that next... When it's time to go, it's time to go.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#573 - Morgan Wallen
Ain't that right? Bro, hell yeah, that's the Gavin Adcock national anthem.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#573 - Morgan Wallen
Oh, dude, he'll be on stage. People are throwing fucking beers. He just has beers bouncing off of him. He's an animal, dude.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#573 - Morgan Wallen
it'd be like the PA system shut down but we gonna still fucking perform he just yell he just he'll hollow out a beer can and just yell out of it and shit he's fucking doing all kinds of shit he is ballsy dude his personality's cool he's a fun guy very entertaining I gotta tap into more of his music I haven't listened to a lot of his music yeah you need to get him on here yeah I do need to people say that we look alike a little bit but I think they're just being nice to me to you to you or him well
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#573 - Morgan Wallen
One of us, dude. Oh, yeah. You got your drink here, man. You brought this today. That real tea. How's it going?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#573 - Morgan Wallen
I like it. I like having a nice little can of tea or something. I'll keep a couple in the car. I'll drink them warm even.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#573 - Morgan Wallen
Bro, maybe he'll have a cover band of the Rolling Stones. It's called Kidney Stones. It's the Rolling Kidney Stones. Is there a song sometimes of your own that you'll listen to or one that catches you sometimes and it'll kind of catch in your feels a little bit? Is there any one that you're like...
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#573 - Morgan Wallen
Yeah, man, there's one thing I've always thought you had very good instincts, man. I've always admired your instincts, you know, whether it's humor, we're joking around, whatever. You're fucking sharp, dude. You're a sharp fucking guy. And yeah, it's been I appreciate you just support my podcast. And, you know, it's nice of you. And thanks for all the great music, man. That one about the mom.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#573 - Morgan Wallen
Oh, I wrote the book. And that one sometimes. That's one of my favorites still. If I'm driving home at night or something, I listen to that one, dude. You know, that's a good one. That was like kind of puts me in a good spot, you know? Yeah. I like that one too, man. Yeah. And what's the one about the mom? You talking about my mom? Yeah. Thought you should know. Yeah, that one. Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#573 - Morgan Wallen
God, that one. God damn, dude. I pull over and cry sometimes.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#573 - Morgan Wallen
I'm like, fuck, you can't cry and drive, you little bitch.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#573 - Morgan Wallen
One of the most prolific artists, I think, ever on the face of the earth, man. It's a pleasure, dude. I feel lucky to get to know your cousin. He and I are close. And, yeah, just thanks for all the entertainment on behalf of everybody. And it's just been a gift, man.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#573 - Morgan Wallen
We don't know these people, man. Stranger danger, baby. Yeah, yeah. So I'm trying to teach him a little bit of that. He's wild, definitely. He emailed me the other day asking me to send him some Zens. I was like, dude, you got to.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#573 - Morgan Wallen
That's just a little bit of mouth math, homie. But you'll see a dude with like 11 threes, and I'm like, bitch, just get a damn 20 or something.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#573 - Morgan Wallen
They're at theovonstore.com. And thank you for your support if you choose to purchase one. Today's guest made me feel welcome when I got here to Tennessee. He's arguably the most popular musician on the planet. He's the East Tennessee Elvis, baby. You know what he is. I mean, he's so prolific. He's very competitive, and I admire his attention to detail.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#573 - Morgan Wallen
And he thought that was me singing. I said, damn, man.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#573 - Morgan Wallen
And then he's just bidding on pigs at his daycare? Yeah, probably. Well, I went down to the ground to county. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#573 - Morgan Wallen
Oh, yeah, and the email he sent me, he's like, yeah, you need to listen to my father's hit, Cotton Eye Joe, as well. Oh, yeah. Well, we are from Knoxville, you know. He's seen that sign a few times. That checks out, man. As you make more music, so the new album, I'm the Problem. As you make more music, because you have been so prolific, I think that's the word. What does prolific mean?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#573 - Morgan Wallen
Okay. But I don't know if either one of us should be.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#573 - Morgan Wallen
Producing much fruit. Producing much fruit, foliage, or offspring, actually, it says. I ain't been that prolific in that term, but yeah. Presenting one plentiful, it says. Producing many works. But does it get tougher to like, okay, how do I not have a song that's similar to a song I previous had? Because when you have so many songs, does that get a little bit tough, or what's that like?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#573 - Morgan Wallen
Has there been a great song that you guys have put together and then you're like, oh man, it's just a little too close to this?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#573 - Morgan Wallen
Yeah, because I guess people are just going, they don't know where your next step is and who you are.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#573 - Morgan Wallen
Because you can kind of, yeah. It's funny. I was talking to Charlie Hansen the other night. Dude, that guy, bro, him and Marissa. Is that his? Marissa?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#573 - Morgan Wallen
Bro, they're hilarious, bro. They are hilarious. She's so funny, dude. She kind of keeps him in check, I feel like. The pairing, both of them, because he's so kind of rough around the edges. Maybe that's not a crazy thing to say about him.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#573 - Morgan Wallen
Today's guest is one of a kind, Mr. Morgan Wallace.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#573 - Morgan Wallen
I could see that 100%, dude. Yeah. What did I say? Oh, he'd gotten married, right? And his wife one night, I think she probably had a cocktail or two and invited me to their wedding, right? Yeah. And I had to work that weekend. But I saw pictures. You went. I think Hardy went. It looked like a good time.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#573 - Morgan Wallen
God. Yeah, but – and then so when I saw him, I said, hey, man, I'm sorry I couldn't make it to the wedding. He's like, well, you know, we weren't really expecting you there. Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#573 - Morgan Wallen
It was – but he's just like, look, man, we don't – we don't super know each other that good, he said. But it was so like just the realest shit ever. He's like, and if we become better friends and, you know, and that happens, then yeah, man, I'd expect you to be at my, you know, if I get divorced or if I do a renew of the vows. I'd expect you to be at my divorce now.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#573 - Morgan Wallen
Dude, it was just like, and I was like, dude, you're so right. I was like, and it didn't make me want to get to know him more because it was like just cutting through the bullshit.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#573 - Morgan Wallen
Which I think is probably what makes him a good songwriter too. Cause it's like, you gotta like, if you too much bull, it's like if you can cut through the bullshit. Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E558 Katt Williams
You know, I just went through this on my phone and computer. I had to get it all figured out. I was paying for extra services that I didn't want. You know, they had some different annual, some of them were annual, some of them were monthly. There were things I couldn't believe I was still involved in. Rocket Money helped me figure that all out.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E558 Katt Williams
Oh, damn. My bad. Sorry. No problem. But he lives in Dayton now, though.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E558 Katt Williams
I want to say it's Pearl Harbor in there maybe. Hiroshima. It could be Hiroshima. Little Boy and Fat Man. There we are. Yeah, that's what Rogan named the rooms of his comedy club after. He certainly did. The Mothership. Yeah, they really get it over there.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E558 Katt Williams
Of moving there? Is Austin calling you? A little bit. Are they trying to put pressure on you? A little bit. At first, I wanted to do my own thing, like a lot of people were moving there. But now when I'm there, it just feels like it's a fun energy. It is. And there's people on stage, and you can go up and down that 6th Street, and you can do five or six sets in a night.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E558 Katt Williams
I mean, that's a lot of practice and it's probably within 800 footsteps or whatever. Yeah. So that to me seems really remarkable. What's on your, what's on the new tour? What's it like? Like, what's it like to still go out there? What's it like to like, do you do in the round? What's your show like? I've been to a Cat Williams show. Clearly. Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E558 Katt Williams
Well, that's nice of you to say. I feel like... I can't believe I'm around you, I think. I feel like you seem like a... Mythical figure. Right. Well... You know, like... Sack Squatch or... Like a unicorn or something like that.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E558 Katt Williams
Yeah. What do you bring with you on the road? Somebody said you bring a Cybertruck. Is that true?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E558 Katt Williams
It's fun. It feels like you're driving an e-mail kind of.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E558 Katt Williams
It feels like you're driving an e-mail. That's what I feel like sometimes.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E558 Katt Williams
What do you do for fitness, man? What's your fitness regime like? You got a regime each day, or what's that like?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E558 Katt Williams
On the dime, baby. He'll show up. Yeah, yeah, yeah. He'll fucking checkmate a scale, baby. You know what I'm saying?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E558 Katt Williams
Right, right. Yeah, I think I like, what have I been doing recently? Swimming. Oh, there's you playing golf right there. Damn, cat out there.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E558 Katt Williams
Banging out there, yeah. Well. You can't get them arms. I guess at a certain point your arms don't need to go that high in the air anyway, though. I'm trying to think of what I –
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E558 Katt Williams
And how'd you bang them cuffs up? What happened, you think? What you mean? How'd you...
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E558 Katt Williams
God damn, boy. You better fuck it. Pull up at a Jiffy Lube and get well, buddy.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E558 Katt Williams
You took it to the limit, right? Yeah, maybe you could probably do some swimming safely. Maybe I could see you getting up. Oh, I'm an avid water guy.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E558 Katt Williams
Yeah, I have a trouble out there. I think I'm just not the best swimmer, man. I don't like to swim cap either. I never liked putting that cap on. That just was not something that was my vibe.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E558 Katt Williams
I don't like it, man. I don't like being out in the air. I'm kind of a land dog. I like being on land. I respect water too much. I think I get too scared in it. That's it. I get scared in it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E558 Katt Williams
I'm pretty chill, I think. I'm okay in a jacuzzi, but even then, if nobody's around, I just don't know if I trust myself or not to like. If I'm even driving through a long puddle, I'll look at my watch and make sure everything's all right. But you had a drowning incident in your past? I think I've just had some probably nervous experiences with it, man.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E558 Katt Williams
We used to have a neighbor, and this guy was probably, I don't know if you, he had like one of them big bathtubs they had at their house. And they would, he would play, he would make us play Navy or something. He's probably a gay guy, but we didn't know, right? But he would have us playing Navy.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E558 Katt Williams
Yeah, we had, well, but he'd have his plate, but it was just like a lot of.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E558 Katt Williams
Give me my $4. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Bro, we grew up just, back then they had this more pedophiles and wildness, I think, back then, man. People wouldn't, now it's all documented, you know? Right. But back then it was just people was more, you know, I remember we had a guy they call one basketball coach had been like kind of tickling the kids a lot. Right.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E558 Katt Williams
And then the other guy called him and he said, hey.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E558 Katt Williams
But they had, yeah, just, but they called him and said, hey, they said, Mr. Sharp, you said, if you keep tickling a kid, you can't coach him no more. But that was it. There wasn't like a lawsuit or anything. It was just more, you know, stern activity. Don't do it. Don't do it like that. But we had, I mean, I don't fucking know, man. What was that? What were we talking about? Oh, swimming people.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E558 Katt Williams
Swimming, man. Yeah, I never, I think I just get too nervous in water. I just, I know it's too powerful. That's what I know. Yeah. I know it's way more powerful than I am, man. Yeah. But it's so funny. Like, yeah, because I could see you, man. I think sometimes if I think about you, I think about you like I could see you having like a show at a SeaWorld or something like that, you know?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E558 Katt Williams
Like, you know what I'm saying? Matt, like a. the cat.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E558 Katt Williams
Free Nemo, bro. Until it's backwards, man. I don't know what happened yesterday. Everyone's got. Dude, if they had one night though. Yeah. I'm talking a $320 ticket. It's a pricey ticket, but it's a one night only. Cat Williams and the whales, baby. Right. Cat fish. I got you. People, it'd be unprecedented, man. Indeed.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E558 Katt Williams
Right. So get back to the guy in his big bathtub. Oh, yeah. Roy was his name. Roy. And he ended up in the military. But at the time, nobody knew that. We were just children, and he got a whistle or something. Somebody bought him a whistle. And so he would just have us do these little games or whatever, you know? Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E558 Katt Williams
And so I don't know if kids were violent during that or sometimes people would be aggressive or something. But I think maybe that made me nervous about water. My sister almost drowned one time. I thought she did drown. But she almost drowned once. So I think just stuff like that. We would go swim in a river and there weren't a lot of lifeguards.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E558 Katt Williams
So I think that's super scary because, you know, you get caught with a current or something. It's just real. It can be a lot, you know. Which river? The river we were at, I think it was probably part of the Chifuncta, like a little tributary of it. Dirty water? Yeah. That's scary too. Yeah. Yeah, so just that kind of atmosphere, I guess, maybe. Trying to think what made me so scared.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E558 Katt Williams
Well, thanks, man. I feel the same about you. I feel like everybody does.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E558 Katt Williams
And you know what? I don't know if I knew how to swim that great. Yeah, Chifuncta River. I don't know if I knew how to swim that great, to be honest with you. But yeah, I think, yeah, people could. I would love to see you do a water show of some sort one day if you ventured out to that sort of thing.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E558 Katt Williams
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E558 Katt Williams
So, you know. So, yeah. Thank you, man. Thank you for letting them even do that statue. What was that whole deal like with them, with Michaels? That's where I got mine at, was at Michaels.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E558 Katt Williams
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E558 Katt Williams
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E558 Katt Williams
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E558 Katt Williams
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E558 Katt Williams
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E558 Katt Williams
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E558 Katt Williams
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E558 Katt Williams
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E558 Katt Williams
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E558 Katt Williams
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E558 Katt Williams
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E558 Katt Williams
Point your toes west. Were you affected by the fires, Kat? Do you all have any damage? Um...
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E558 Katt Williams
Yeah, it's so surprising, man. I had a friend I was talking to, and he said, hey, do you want me to go to your apartment and get your, I got a Jeep Cherokee out here, so you want me to go get it in case the winds change it? And I said, I think it's going to be okay. And I said, what are you doing? He's like, I'm going to an audition.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E558 Katt Williams
And it was just so wild that you had places that were completely disappear off the earth. And then you have a guy who's going to an audition at the same time, you know, just that there's so many things happening at once in this. It's like part of it is so affected and some of it is unaffected, you know, kind of just was a dike child of me.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E558 Katt Williams
Well, thank you. We wish you a black Christmas. Look, I'd be honored to have one. I'd be honored to have one. Yeah, man. Because, yeah, when I met that guy there, he said, we got two left, man. And there was 201 of them was marked down because it had a chip in it. But it's still, man, it's an honor. I keep it up in my house year round.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E558 Katt Williams
Yeah, man. Yeah, sometimes I think about what it would be like if I were another ethnicity, you know? You ever imagine like that? Like if you was an Asian guy? Like if you could handle it? No. You ever had dreams like that where you're Asian?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E558 Katt Williams
Like I'm in the driver's seat. Yeah, it'd be cool to be a passenger, but I like the seat I'm in.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E558 Katt Williams
And people walk in and they're like, no way, that's Cat William right there. It is. And it's beautiful, man. Thank you. Yeah. You have a new tour, man. I know people talk about touring and comedy a lot, and I want to know what kind of keeps you still doing comedy. Because I think when we start out, maybe it's to be funny, and then some people get to this place where they want to have a message.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E558 Katt Williams
Yeah, because I think about that a lot, I guess, of what it would be like to be different ethnicities, if I could handle it, you know, if I would think it was fun.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E558 Katt Williams
Yeah, you can. I would like, you know, if I ever. I don't know what I'm saying. I'm trying to. culture vulture or whatever, but I would like, if they ever give you, if they do, you know, if they let people, if I get to do reincarnation, I would put it in an application. I know that.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E558 Katt Williams
Ethnicity, you mean? Don't go right to black. Okay, I won't. I'll wait at least a round or whatever. I will do... I don't know if I, would I do, I don't, Asian seems so, it feels like you could, it feels easy to do kind of. I hate to say that. It just seems. Yeah, that's racist. Sorry. No, it's okay. Okay. Yes, I said it. Asian people. Oh, I would be Mexican. Mexican seems cool.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E558 Katt Williams
It's, you're kind of almost, you're like a little black or whatever, but you're also, you're just.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E558 Katt Williams
No, the first Mexican. No, the kid, the first Mexican that we ever had in our school.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E558 Katt Williams
Yeah. Yeah. I would go easy into it. I wouldn't let anybody know that I was had been there, that I was it was my first time. I think you'd have to be – because sometimes I believe you have first times as a human even. Like you meet some people and it's like, oh, this is this person's first time being a human, the soul. Right. This is a damn newborn, you know. Right.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E558 Katt Williams
And then you meet some people and you're like, damn, this person is a sensei. This person has been – They've been here before. They've been here before. Right. Right. But yeah, I wouldn't go do black first, man. I wouldn't, yeah, I would definitely keep that for like a, or I would, yeah, I would try, I would be, I would be honored to do it if they let me do it. That's what I would say.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E558 Katt Williams
Do you notice that kind of tone shift in your desire to do it over time?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E558 Katt Williams
Everything a little bit different, I'm sure. But, yeah, I don't know if I'd go – yeah, I would like to. Especially if I got to bring a friend, I would definitely do it, man.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E558 Katt Williams
Yeah. No, see, I want to just have some safety. Same reason I don't want to be in the water. It's just when I feel risk, it makes me feel nervous.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E558 Katt Williams
Man, that's interesting. That is kind of how I feel. Yeah, because I'm always thinking of what this other thing would be like.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E558 Katt Williams
Do you believe that most of the people here that are living right now, that this is their home planet?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E558 Katt Williams
No. So you feel like it's more that we're – you feel like we're maybe a species from somewhere else that's been kind of – that landed here or that got – All of the religions tell the same story.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E558 Katt Williams
Do you feel like this is like a place where we're supposed to learn something? Do you feel like it's a place that we're kind of just spending time? An experience.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E558 Katt Williams
Yeah. Yeah, sometimes I forget I get caught up in the minutia of things, you know, and I forget to kind of have this bigger breath of like.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E558 Katt Williams
Yeah. I feel that all the time, man. I feel like I don't know any other way to be almost sometimes, like not in a bad way, but yeah, I feel like it's, it's this constant sentence. You're like, you gotta, I feel like there's always been this to-do list that I don't even make and it's just always been there. Does that make any sense to you? Yeah. That's how I feel all the time.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E558 Katt Williams
Do you feel like who was like a role model when you were growing up? Do you, where do you think you got some of your own influences from? Do you think it was from people like actually humans in the world? Or do you feel like you had kind of like divine thoughts that came into your head or guidance? Like where did that kind of stuff affect you? Like when you were younger, do you feel like.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E558 Katt Williams
And it's the heaven on earth tour. Do you believe in heaven? Absolutely. And earth. Yeah. Okay. All right. Fair. Touche, man. Yeah. Dude, I remember when I first, because like when I was growing up, we just had, you know, you learned about heaven and stuff, but all the pamphlets or whatever I'd seen at church or anything, it always had, it was mostly white folks on it, right? Yeah.
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E558 Katt Williams
What are you smoking, Ken? Sir? Brother? You smoke it? If it's not pot, I can smoke it.
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So racist. Yeah, it's weird. You can burn down a whole town, but you can't have a Newport. Right.
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Yes, sir. We had some cool black kids growing up in our area, bro. Right.
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Don Galatis. He had a child. Number 34 of our basketball pitcher. We had a lot of good kids in there, man. Right. Shout out James Gray. His dad ran a tire place. He was in there. There's Vincent. He got all the ladies, Vincent, dude. And Johnny, that's Big Johnny. He was damn 11 feet tall, baby. He had birds living on his shoulders, baby. He was up there.
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E558 Katt Williams
Here they are together. Bro, Johnny was so tall, he had windows on the side of his head, but he was tall, man. No, you were kneeling down. Countless stories. That's true.
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Thanks for the nice words. I appreciate it. You do a great job too, man. Thank you for all the joy over the years. You just bought a military base. Is that right? Yeah. Formerly Fort McClellan. Fort McClellan.
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E558 Katt Williams
And then I went to a black church one time. It was, I think it's called Greater Starlight Baptist Church. That was in our town. Shout out to Greater Starlight Baptist Church. Oh, yeah. It was nice in there. This was in Covington, Louisiana.
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E558 Katt Williams
Was that a tough step to, like, take that, like, okay, we can get this and we can do this? Like, did you reach out to Tyler Perry? Because I know he has, like, in Atlanta, he has an amazing space. He may have many spaces now. This was three years ago. I went to a space there to train for something, and they were, it was unbelievable. Yeah.
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So, yeah. So it would be a place where you could make other people's kind of dreams come true, like with film, television, that sort of thing.
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Yeah, there you go. Wow. Map Williams in the building, baby. But, and that's when I realized. Don't make me go girt. Everybody's. That's when I realized, oh, everybody's going to be in heaven. That was the first time that I realized heaven was going to be very diverse. I'd never thought about it. Right. And it blew my mind.
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E558 Katt Williams
Dude, that's exciting, huh? It is. It is. Will you have your hand in on most of the projects? Is that a weird question?
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E558 Katt Williams
Yeah, it's pretty nice. Instead of seeing if you have the cars, that's owning the deck, really, you know?
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E558 Katt Williams
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E558 Katt Williams
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E558 Katt Williams
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E558 Katt Williams
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E558 Katt Williams
I was like, oh, wow, they're going to have black folks in heaven, Asian folks. All types of folks are going to be there, you know.
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E558 Katt Williams
Use my promo code, Theo, and you'll get 20% off and free international shipping at checkout. That's 20% off plus free international shipping with promo code T-H-E-O at manscaped.com. Happy Valentine's Day. What, um... Are you married or not, Kat?
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E558 Katt Williams
Yeah, sometimes I've been thinking a lot about getting married, but I don't know if sometimes it's like an outside pressure that I feel or if it's just like something I would like to have that family, you know? Like that, you know, I think you always have like an idea of what a family is, you know?
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E558 Katt Williams
So sometimes I feel like that's something I want to try to make happen, you know? It seemed like it would be a real challenge.
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Feeling like I have to fill in the blanks as opposed to what do I really want to create, you know? Like, or being like, well, what if I didn't get married? What would people think? You know, sometimes I'll get that stuck in my head, you know? Yeah. I guess it's normal, but.
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E558 Katt Williams
Yeah, yeah, I don't want to set myself up for – that's a good point too. I don't want to set myself up for a situation that would be uncomfortable for me or I would hurt somebody else's feelings either.
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E558 Katt Williams
Pretty much. I mean, I haven't dated just a black lady.
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E558 Katt Williams
No. I mean, there's a cute black lady I met at the airport that if I see her again, I think I would try to ask her out, but I haven't seen her again. But I would be open to dating a cool black lady. Hold on. Hold on. Let's talk specifically about this one you're talking about. Yeah, she just looked like really confident and nice smile and pretty eyes.
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E558 Katt Williams
Yeah. I guess I'm kind of, I don't know if I'm starting to look forward to it. I am excited about it. Yeah. But I, yeah, I guess I get caught up in like a lot of worldly stuff, you know, like there's still things I want to do here, that type of thing, you know?
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And I was like, man, there's just something about her.
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All right. And she was where? That I admired. She was working at the airport. Working at the airport. So she was a worker. She liked to work. She doesn't mind work. Hey, hey, they're beautiful.
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E558 Katt Williams
You bet it was. Yeah. So she was TSA approved too, you know, so. Right, right.
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E558 Katt Williams
I don't know. She might be watching. Do you do that? You put things like into, do you like do that, like speak things into existence type of thing?
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Cancel your unwanted subscriptions and reach your financial goals faster with Rocket Money. Go to RocketMoney.com slash T-H-E-O. That's RocketMoney.com slash Theo. RocketMoney.com slash T-H-E-O. Today's guest is, well, he's the GOAT. He is an iconic comedian. He has a new tour going on right now called the Heaven on Earth Tour.
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E558 Katt Williams
Yeah, man. Cause I, yeah, that, that, yeah, this could be part of my 2025, man. It is. It clearly is. Right. Right. We've said it. We are. We've said it. Yeah. Yeah. Well, you had a lot of last year. You seem like you had a lot of predictions last year. You kind of became this Oracle last year. Did you feel that? That people came to you.
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They almost said you almost became kind of like this, like a little bit of like a crystal ball, you know?
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Did you start to worry any about your own safety and stuff? Because it seemed like you really had some moments where you're kind of almost channeling truths into the world. And some people don't like that. Some people don't want to – I mean the dark side of things doesn't really probably enjoy that.
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Yeah, you don't see the dog catcher show up every other year in a nice skirt. You don't see an electrician come up in a blouse every now and then.
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What was your question? Do you have a first book that you remember reading or one that got read to you when you were a kid or something that you really liked? Like a book that set it off for you that was like, oh.
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E558 Katt Williams
Yeah, just the idea of being able to take myself into a different place, you know. It was like, and it really, I mean, words really just fuel for your imagination. It's like, that's how you would get your head going, you know.
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E558 Katt Williams
Amen. Amen. Did y'all, I'm trying to think of some of my favorite books when I was a kid. I don't even remember. When I was young. We're the Red Fern, girl. We had to read all kind of shit. They had one book that kept killing this dog in it. I felt so bad for him. How many times can you kill a dog? I mean, they kept that thing was fucking really dead. I don't remember that.
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I don't know who wrote that bitch, but I think Stephen King wrote it. But that bitch was dead, bro. After the second chapter, I said, this bitch is dead, guys.
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Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, I think that is something that like if I stay kind of motivated and I have a plan a little bit, that keeps me a lot more like, OK, I want to do this. I still want to try that. Yeah. And I start to think, man, I'm running out of time, too.
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E558 Katt Williams
Yeah, he looked like he owned a bunch of ravens or something. That dude, yeah, everybody, he had one book then. The animals was kept being alive and dead. Edgar Allan Poe was a favorite of mine.
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E558 Katt Williams
He had a lot of women, too. Bring up some of his ladies he had. Edgar Allan Poe's girlfriend. He had a flock at the end. You know, I think he used to live in Virginia. You know that? Edgar Allan Poe. Click on a couple of his dimes he had. Look at these broads right here. Yeah. Just click on one of them. Damn.
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Right there, baby. You tell him. Shorty won a thug.
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That's how he liked them. That's how he liked them, boy. Oh, shit. Now, she's cute. No, come on now. Right there. Frances, baby. That was his foster mother. That was his foster mother. Whatever. Damn, bro. Why you fucking helping me out? Fire.
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Right. Whatever. We got our research department. Now, what about right there? Virginia Clem, baby. Right. That's a girlfriend. Right.
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Oh, wow. Let me see. Sarah Helen Whitman, a professional writer who met Edgar through the literary circles in New York. Valatio.
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You know, if you really like to taste different things and smell different flowers and, you know, and see what's on in different gardens and stuff, then you start to run out of time. No. You don't think?
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E558 Katt Williams
She'll slurp you back to Saturn right there, man. Wait a minute. Why did Zuckerberg come? Oh, jeez. I don't know why they brought him up. You have genius here. Oh, we have the new hair. Yeah, he has the new hair. What do you think about a lot of these social media sites controlling how people communicate? What do you think about that, man? You fear that kind of stuff?
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E558 Katt Williams
Right. At that point, we're almost the fools for pretending that we would still have it, privacy. Yeah. Right. I'm saying. Do you feel like in Hollywood that there are – I've heard you kind of allude to the fact that there's like kind of darker forces that kind of like – that present opportunities to people in trade-off, right?
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In trade for their own – maybe their own peace, maybe their own reality, maybe a sacrifice of their actual direction that they want. Do you think that really happens, that kind of stuff?
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Mm-hmm. You think there's ever ways where we can get to the control room and see who's controlling or you think that's all?
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Do you think Hollywood has a lot of things that they like hold against people, you know? Like I had a theory that. A lot of this is human nature. Right. So it's not even Hollywood. It's just human nature.
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In any circle of business, really. Yeah. They had a big bust with Puff Diddy where he got arrested. And then they've had, like, accusations and stuff. He hasn't gone on trial, I don't think, yet. But do you think that they – there's been speculation that they did that because they – the timing of that was they wanted to, like –
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E558 Katt Williams
use other people that have allegedly been involved in some of his circles to, they wanted to kind of use like, okay, you could be next unless you help this political plan. Do you think that's at all possible? That's how all cases are handled, right?
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But do you feel like they would say to someone, okay, we're going to bring you in unless... Absolutely. That's what they do.
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Wow. Right. Man, so how do you know who is, that's part of the game, huh? You don't know. It's part of the game.
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Did you ever do a rap album? Yep. You did? Several. I didn't know that. I'm sorry, man. I didn't research that.
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You asked me, did I do them? Oh, yeah. Yeah. Did you have some collabs on them with anybody? Did somebody help you produce some stuff? Master P, maybe anything like that?
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I'm just thinking of somebody from Louisiana. Right. What a blessing. When I was in college, he used to – they had – it was like master – it was like Silk the Shocker. Like that whole cabal was really, really vibing, right? Yes. So they used to have – they would all come to LSU and play at the basketball courts. And they would have these guys who would stand on the side and hold their clothes.
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E558 Katt Williams
And they were dressed like kind of Native Americans, like almost like black Indians kind of. And some of them would have on like little headdresses and stuff. And they would have them all holding their clothes and shoes on the side of the court. It was a vibe, man.
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E558 Katt Williams
Did you ever tour with the... With a rap, did you ever, because sometimes you'll have musicians and rappers, or musicians and comedians tour together. Yeah. You have? Mm-hmm. I just didn't know. Some people like that, some people don't.
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E558 Katt Williams
I know. So it's just used as like a mechanism to what? Limit our thinking?
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how I think or feel some moment. All of it, like... Yeah. Remember Shy? Remember that group came out? And if I ever fall. Remember them? I can't sing either. I do.
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I'm trying to think of one of the first. Oh, I went to a good one. Shy. Green Day. You're going to make a great black guy. Oh, yeah. And they had Tevin Campbell. Remember him? Can we talk for a minute? Tevin Campbell.
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E558 Katt Williams
That's true, that's true, that's true. He really had a different... Right. The sequel to that song was a surprise. We'll just say it like that, man. The sequel was a surprise. That was a good time, though. That was a good time. It was a good time. When was that? That was late 90s, I think. Did you ever get to meet Michael Jackson before? No, I got to meet Prince. You did? Yeah.
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E558 Katt Williams
Did you ever get to go bike riding with him or anything like that? Who's that? Prince.
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Dude, if I was that big, I couldn't get my big ass out of bed at that size, man. It'd be so hard. Because sometimes it's kind of hard at even a regular size to get up. I don't believe that. You know how hard it is to get a big old, look at it right there. It's so hard to get up when you're big. Right. I watched my aunt get up sometime. Like, she ain't going to get up.
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You know what I'm talking about? You ever see somebody and you're like, she ain't going to get up.
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They evacuate, they just look the other way. That's their evacuate. Just lean away from the warm. Flip the pillow. Yeah. Did you, what did you and Prince do? Did y'all ever go out to eat or nothing? Like, what did he like to do? No, so, like.
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E558 Katt Williams
I'd love to watch him eat a little snack or something, a little creme brulee or a little big scoop of ice cream. I'd love to see that because he was kind of smaller, wasn't he?
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E558 Katt Williams
Yeah, sorry. Watch a small person, if they get up against a real hard scoop of ice cream, they fucking can't handle that bitch, you know? No, no, no.
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E558 Katt Williams
No, I just sometimes if somebody, you know, I know like if I get up, if it's a real cold scoop of ice cream and it's hard to, you know, get with a spoon or something, I just imagine like a smaller guy battling that bitch, bro. I just, I can't.
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E558 Katt Williams
I just want to envision in my head, Prince, you just got two or three spoons going on that bit. He going to get in there. He'd have whooped your ass in here. He probably would have, and blessings, man. I'd have had to pull him off. Man, he's a purple superhero, and he is the king, man. In real life, yeah. I'm just joking, Prince.
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E558 Katt Williams
Oh, I saw him stop in. I was in Minneapolis. They used to have this place called... And he got more pussy than you. Did he? Yeah. Oh, yeah, of course he did. What the fuck am I talking about? It took me half a second to realize that. Yeah, of course he did. Damn, boy. Yeah. Well, no, they had a place, though, that he would go perform sometimes on a certain night.
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It was in Minneapolis, and a lot of musicians would just show up, and one night he showed up there, man, and it was amazing. It was just random people would get together and play.
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How you going to say you got 30 swim trunks, but you ain't never been in the ocean, Joe Rogan? Thank you for having a good sense of humor, man.
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E558 Katt Williams
But did, when you were growing up, did you ever have like a TV, like a TV father kind of, you know, like I had, like, I'm trying to think of like, just trying to think of like influences that you had when you were young. Like I had like Little House on the Prairie was a show I would watch that they had. Michael Landon was on it. And then they had like In the Heat of the Night.
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E558 Katt Williams
I really liked that show. Now, wait a minute. Yeah.
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E558 Katt Williams
Virgil Tibbs. Virgil Tibbs. Yeah, probably. He was good. I will tell you this. I met his wife at a, or not his wife, but. The lady that played him? Yes, that's her right there. Virgil and Sophia was his wife in the show, I think. She was way smaller than you thought, right? She was very beautiful. And I saw her at a breakfast place and I was like, I cannot go back in there and tell her. And I did.
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E558 Katt Williams
And it was, she, I think she kind of appreciated it, but it was still pretty awkward, I think. But she's very beautiful. But yeah, I liked him and Carol O'Connor was in it.
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E558 Katt Williams
I am a good sense of humor. Yeah, sometimes we forget about that along the way, man. You are. How long do you want to live for, then, you think, Cat? You got to check out, you got to, when you ever think about it?
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E558 Katt Williams
Right. That shit was good. I loved that. What else did I like? I'm trying to think of a show where I had like a TV dad. Did you have like a TV family or someone that you kind of liked?
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E558 Katt Williams
It would have been shocking if my mom was always working. I would be like, Mom, tell me you love me. And she'd be like, I got to move this box over here. That's what she would be like. I'm like, mom, how do you feel about me? She's like, oh, we got to put all these boxes away. She always had something to do, you know? Like if a feeling came up, my mom just couldn't have it, you know?
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E558 Katt Williams
I love you, mom. I'm just, it's funny. Now it's funny. Right. But now you can. Yeah, that shit was ridiculous though, bro. I was like, Mom, how do you feel about it? She's like, we got to get this car to start. I'm like, what the fuck are you talking about? Where's the vacuum? Right. Yeah, that was it. That's what I think. That's what I always was looking for, for me.
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E558 Katt Williams
My little layover lady. That's what I call it, my little layover. I've seen you. This is something that I thought. There's only two things that I think that I've seen and I'm not sure. One of them was that Santa Claus, when I was a kid, that they brought us outside and they had a real sleigh go by in the air. It was an airplane that they disguised as a sleigh in our town.
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The second one is I thought I saw you riding bikes down Sunset Boulevard. Right.
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Oh, yeah. I didn't see those, man. I'm sorry. I saw some bitches. Somebody covered them bitches.
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E558 Katt Williams
Yeah, I swear to God, I'm standing on the porch. I look over there. Right. And you had done one of those things where you stand up, but keep, you know what I'm saying? It's just, you know, when you're riding down the street. I'm 5'5", so I do that better than most people. And I said, damn, there he goes, bro. Right. And by the time I get anybody's attention, nobody believed me.
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E558 Katt Williams
So that's why I think it had a lot of that same like when you saw Santa, you know, type of energy.
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E558 Katt Williams
Because I thought I was crazy for thinking that. Right. What do you see happening in 2025, Cat? This is where we get to where like – What do you feel like? What do you feel like are things we can look forward to, things we can stay conscious of? Can I bum another cigarette by chance, man? You got an extra one?
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E558 Katt Williams
Do you think that there is actual cloning going on?
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E558 Katt Williams
Two people have received a genetically modified pig heart transplant, David Bennett and Lawrence Fawcett. Both were performed in Maryland.
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E558 Katt Williams
Do you think there's any artists now that you think are not the same artists that we thought they were?
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E558 Katt Williams
That in your own life where people try to come at you for offers like that, do you think that like stars and get offered that kind of thing? Like to compromise themselves sexually for entertainment?
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E558 Katt Williams
Were there things that you didn't take in your career that you feel like were...
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He is labeled by many as an oracle, as the Black Crystal Ball, I've heard him called. I'm thankful that he came down from the clouds today to spend time with us. Today's guest is Mr. Cat Williams.
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E558 Katt Williams
Do you think some comedians start to feel like they have and that that's a trap?
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do you have a comedian that passed away that you really like that you miss a lot I mean I know there's been a lot of them but did you have like a real I was just gonna say I miss so many like did you have like a brother in comedy like I miss so many like what was Bernie Mac like was he a super guy cause I never seen anybody like him
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E558 Katt Williams
Bring up a picture of Rinaldo Rey. I'm just not familiar with him, just so I can see what he looks like. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Didn't he play in the Cosby show?
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E558 Katt Williams
What about Bill Cosby? Did you ever get to meet him or not? Before he had all the problems?
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E558 Katt Williams
That was, yeah, that was, yeah, I did, but yeah, what was he like before that?
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E558 Katt Williams
Yeah, that's definitely different then. What else is going on?
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E558 Katt Williams
I do not have an R. Kelly question. No, I don't. Did you get to go to Bernie Mac's funeral? Did he have a big funeral? No.
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E558 Katt Williams
I feel like I'm not doing that good right now on it.
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E558 Katt Williams
Thanks, man. Did you get – was it scary for you to be a parent whenever you decided you wanted to be a parent? Oh, yeah.
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What sidetracks comedians? I guess it could be all types of things, huh? What sidetracks them from maybe fulfilling their... Excellence is difficult.
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E558 Katt Williams
You see what I'm saying? I think that's why I became a comedian because I didn't want any responsibilities, really.
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E558 Katt Williams
In a lot of ways. I think it's a big part of me that starts to feel like, yeah, I'm missing out if I don't. I'm missing out, but I just want to know. I want to have every experience I can, you know?
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E558 Katt Williams
and make sure I don't have any illegal substances on me too at the same time. Just because you're not going to need them. Are you a pet owner? You a big pet owner, man? I've heard that you got some animals over there. Yeah, I love the animals. I've heard you got a couple of horses, things like that. They're great.
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E558 Katt Williams
Diversity in the duck world. Oh, hell yeah, dog. I'm sick of seeing these fucking swans, bro. You know what I'm saying? These rich ass long neck motherfuckers, bro. No, we have geese too. But I'm just saying we need some fucking bangers in there, dog. We need some dark ducks in this bitch.
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E558 Katt Williams
Bring up a couple of black ducks, man. I would love to see those right now. Because I'm used to seeing mallards I've seen for sure. But I've never seen some really good darker ducks. So that's a beautiful one right there. None of these are black ducks. Oh, sorry. Well, get one. But no, get one at the bottom.
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E558 Katt Williams
Yeah. But mine are. Oh, that's fucking Mallard Luther King right there, bro. That thing dark as hell, dude.
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E558 Katt Williams
The king. Yes. Do you think, some people think that guys like Martin Luther King were compromised by the CIA. Do you ever believe stuff like that?
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E558 Katt Williams
You can have peace then. Have you had times in your life where you struggled having God in your life? Or what's that been like for you? No. Do you have a practice that you use kind of to like... Like one of my goals this year is to have more God in my life, right? So for me, I'm just using like more times where I stop and pray.
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E558 Katt Williams
Like even sometimes moments my head will pop in, like you should hit your knees right now and pray. And sometimes I just don't do those. I just go and keep doing it about my day. But now when those hit me, I'm trying to just make sure I do that, you know, just like because it's like an intuition that I have, you know, just because I want to have a stronger practice.
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E558 Katt Williams
How do you pick on – you've had a lot of openers. Like I've met a lot of your openers over the years here and there. How do you choose them, man? How do you choose these guys or women?
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E558 Katt Williams
I've heard you say that you feel like we're about to enter like a golden era. What do you mean kind of by that? Or what feelings do you have about that? And what can we look forward to?
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E558 Katt Williams
Bring it up real quick, Revelations. We can get a look at it.
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E558 Katt Williams
Book of Revelation or Book of the Apocalypse, the final book of the New Testament.
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E558 Katt Williams
Yeah. Yeah, like Santa, they leave milk and cookies. You know what I'm saying? You think we would fucking leave out a couple of freaking.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E558 Katt Williams
Like whenever Jesus comes back, Where do you think it'll be at?
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E558 Katt Williams
So here we are. The Valley of Megiddo, also known as Jezreel Valley, is a large fertile plain in northern Israel. It's known for its historical, theological, and geographical significance. Oh, wow. And there's a lot of war going on right there, right now. Correct. So TBD, huh? Um, what are some of the other animals that you have there? I have heard that you have horses over there.
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E558 Katt Williams
Is that a true, is that true cut that you have some horses over there?
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E558 Katt Williams
Probably about the right there. A mini cow? Yeah. Bring up a mini cow real quick. I want to see one of them. They're beautiful, too. My sister has a picture of a couple of them at her house. Beautiful.
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E558 Katt Williams
Uh-huh. Oh, that's cool. Wow. Are those milkable? He's a boy, so I don't need to know. Oh, damn.
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E558 Katt Williams
Yeah, they're really fun. And do you name, that one's named Cash, and what other name do you have for these animals?
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E558 Katt Williams
Right, right. But you're having a little bit of goat. How much goat are you having monthly, you think? Weekly. Oh, okay. Okay. So Cat got him a little bit of money if he having a weekly goat meal.
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E558 Katt Williams
Yes, sir. Goat eat goat. Hey, man. Goats eat goat. Right. I love that.
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E558 Katt Williams
I think sometimes I was just so nervous about who you are because you seem like such a like – you almost seem like something that came down off of Mount Rushmore to spend time with us today. So I think that's like the mystique about you. So I think sometimes I don't know when it's like okay to joke around and stuff. So you just try and figure it out as you go.
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E558 Katt Williams
I appreciate that. I definitely feel that for sure more than other interviews. I'm trying to think of what else I want to ask you about. This is the best picture I ever got about it. Someone sent this and they said, this is... Cat Williams talking to Cam Newton, somebody said.
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E558 Katt Williams
Yeah. We should make one next year if we made one and we did made some, made a charity for it or something that could be cool.
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E558 Katt Williams
I mean, I would be happy to do that. Yours is really the, yours is the one they're already using without your permission.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E558 Katt Williams
But maybe we'll try to find one. That'd be kind of a neat, maybe we could do something where we raise some money for something. I would love it. You would?
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E558 Katt Williams
And everybody has autism. They have all types of people with autism, yeah? Right. Yeah. I would love to do that. That's a cool idea. And my last question for you, Cat, do you know any Native Americans you ever met any over the years? What's that been like?
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E558 Katt Williams
Yeah. I think when I was getting into comedy in the beginning, I didn't. I wanted people to know me, right? Like I never, I like the jokes and I want them to, I want them to laugh and feel good and see different ways that maybe I think and stuff, but I wanted to sell myself. That's what I always thought, I think.
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E558 Katt Williams
With outdoor stuff, have you ever done any like camping or anything like that? You ever done any long camps? Did you ever do like a plant medicine retreat or anything like that?
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E558 Katt Williams
Yeah, I could see you having like a cool petting zoo or something one day if you wanted to and you ever quit or just wanted to have a peaceful animal type of – or a safari, something like that.
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E558 Katt Williams
Yeah. That's the tool right there. Yeah. Heaven on earth. As it turns out. Yeah.
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E558 Katt Williams
Catman, thank you so much for spending time with me today, man. I appreciate it. Yeah. Thanks for just so many things, so many quotable moments from your life that you've shared with us. And yeah, it's an honor, bro. I really feel honored to be in your presence today. And just, yeah, I can't even believe it. So thank you so much. Likewise.
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E558 Katt Williams
When I first started, I didn't think I, I don't want you to remember one joke. I want you to remember me, right? Like I felt like this desperate. That's a star though.
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E558 Katt Williams
Yeah, you grew up in Ohio, huh? Yes. Yeah. Did you grow up by Dave Chappelle? You guys grew up near each other. Dave Chappelle's not even from Ohio. Isn't he? I thought he was from Dayton. I'm from Dayton. Are you really?
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#585 - Andrew Huberman
Rick Rubin is, I know almost he's a music producer. Yep, music producer. You know, he's also produced comedy. He did, he worked with Andrew Dice Clay and he has great stories about that. Oh, I bet he does. You know, and so what's interesting is I talked to Rick about this. I was like, why is podcasting experiencing this surge, the question you asked.
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#585 - Andrew Huberman
And he said, and this is kind of how Rick talks. He actually talks like this. He's like, because it's real. You know, people, when something's early, they're not thinking about how it's going to be received. You're not thinking about whether or not your corporate sponsors are gonna be happy. This is why Rick, you know, remember Rick,
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#585 - Andrew Huberman
produced Beastie Boys, LL Cool J, Beastie Boys, Red Hot Chili Peppers, Adele, Kanye. He's doing classical music stuff now, country. And he tends to work with people at the beginning and then not necessarily again, maybe on a song or two. And I asked him why.
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#585 - Andrew Huberman
And he's like, because at the beginning, they're in what Josh Waitzkin, the great chess player, has described as the pre-consciousness phase of creativity. You're not trying to defend a title, right? You know, you're not trying to defend a title. You're not thinking about how it's going to be received because you really have nothing to compare it to. You've got to lose. Yeah.
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#585 - Andrew Huberman
Listen, when Chris Cole 360 flipped down Wallenberg, someone was filming it. Right. But after he did that, I'm sure that he thought about, God, like, how do I, how do I like supersede that the next time? How do you, but when, when it's the next big thing, you're just thinking about the next thing. And there's something really beautiful to that.
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#585 - Andrew Huberman
He loves animals, which is great because she's surrounded herself with animals. Are you trying to attack a resemblance there?
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#585 - Andrew Huberman
And that's what people tend to gravitate toward, whether or not it's media, podcasting, skateboarding, motocross. I don't care what it is. We can feel when something is real. In fact, Rick has this great saying, and I love it because one time I saw this whole thing in the media related to somebody I knew, and it turned out that their whole company was just a complete sham.
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#585 - Andrew Huberman
At least that's what the media was claiming. And he said to me, he goes, It's all lies. And I said, yeah, apparently it's all lies. And he said, no, no, no, no. Everything is made up. He said, there's only two things that are true. Nature, like the laws of chemistry, biology, physics, and professional wrestling. He said, because everyone knows professional wrestling is made up.
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#585 - Andrew Huberman
And Rick watches 12 hours a week of professional wrestling. And when I go and see him and we watch professional wrestling, I'm like, why do you watch so much professional wrestling? And he said, you know, it relaxes me. And also you can see all the theater of life there. And he also likes that people don't actually get hurt. But you're also wondering, wait, was that really part of the act?
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#585 - Andrew Huberman
And when you look at politics or you look at the world, you know, a lot of it's made up. Like Bitcoin's on a run today. Everyone's excited. It broke 109 or 110. I mean, great, but Bitcoin's made up. I mean, its value is dependent on people's kind of perceived value of it, right? And so he's right. Everything basically is made up.
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#585 - Andrew Huberman
And so when you capture something that's real to a person, like a song and the way they sing it, and they're not comparing it to the way they sang it last time, Um, they're not thinking about whether or not their tour is bigger than the other big tour that's out there. There's something that I think really resonates with people.
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#585 - Andrew Huberman
And we just go, wow, like that's, you know, I, uh, I see it as like, that's the human spirit in action. It's really beautiful.
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#585 - Andrew Huberman
Well, and I think that's the beauty of childhood, right? You know, is everything's new. Oh, yeah. You know, it's, and you know, this is actually an interesting segue to dopamine because, you know, dopamine is triggered by a bunch of things, but mostly by anticipation of something. Okay.
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#585 - Andrew Huberman
Yeah, basically. So real quick lesson in dopamine. Dopamine's a neurochemical. Some people call it neurotransmitter, neuromodulator. Let's just say it's a chemical. It's a chemical. So it's a liquid. Yeah, basically it's released from neurons. Neurons are nerve cells.
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#585 - Andrew Huberman
and it's going to bind to the next, it's gonna park in a parking spot we call a receptor on the next nerve cell and trigger the activity of that nerve cell. Nerve cells communicate through electricity and chemicals. The chemicals stimulate electricity. And neurons can make the next neuron more active. They can make the next neuron less active. So this is important.
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#585 - Andrew Huberman
In fact, a good kind of mechanical example is if you flex your bicep, you are inhibiting, you are preventing the neurons that flex your tricep. They are antagonistic muscles. And as just kind of a parallel where you can get to, when you, for instance, smell something you like, it's what's called an appetitive response. It's kind of appetite. That inhibits the repulsion response.
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#585 - Andrew Huberman
When you smell vomit or something really putrid, you tend to retract and it tends to shut down at the same time the circuits that would bring you closer to something. So, you know, every circuit in the brain is like that. There's a push and a pull, an accelerator and a brake. And if you do want to. It limits the other. Yeah. Think of it like a seesaw. One goes up, the other goes down. Got it.
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#585 - Andrew Huberman
You know, everything from, if you step on a pin, you move your foot up and guess what? What happens? Your other leg automatically extends. Yeah. Okay. This is called the monosynaptic stretch reflex. If you touch a fish on the side, there's a big old neuron, giant neuron called the Moudner neuron. And what does the fish do? It heads in the opposite direction.
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#585 - Andrew Huberman
These circuits have been selected for because the dumb fish that went toward the thing that touched it probably got eaten. So all these responses are hardwired responses. This chemical dopamine exists in a couple of different places in your brain. It has several roles. The most important ones to know about are that it's involved in generating movement.
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#585 - Andrew Huberman
Yeah. So I think that last shirt says, I think that's that shirt says single mom. Yeah. Ooh, that's like a rock and roll. Whitney's a punk rocker. We have a lot of friends through the punk rock community. Oh yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And she sometimes posts with Chris Cole, who's a guy I grew up watching skateboarding. He said, I think he's in the Tony Hawk skateboarder game.
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#585 - Andrew Huberman
People with Parkinson's lose the neurons that create dopamine. in an area called the substantia nigra. If you were to cut open a human brain, you'd see two dark areas at the bottom of the brain. And in Latin, nigra, dark, black, is down at the bottom of the brain. And those are the neurons that degenerate. And there's a picture of it, but maybe we can find, it's really impressive.
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#585 - Andrew Huberman
You can see even without a microscope, if you just say, I don't know if you said like actual brain tissue or something, There you go, look. So see that first one, look at that. That's probably without any staining. You're just looking at the brain with no microscope. In Parkinson's, those degenerate. You can see it on the right.
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#585 - Andrew Huberman
And what happens is when they're, so dopamine is critical for movement. And it's important to keep that in mind because the other thing that dopamine does is it's involved in a set of brain circuits that are involved in motivation. So if you think about any animal, human, dog, rat, cat, monkey, bat, That animal has three choices for movement.
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#585 - Andrew Huberman
You can move towards something, you can stay still, or you can move backward. Dopamine is involved in motivation, not reward. So when you, like what's something that you really enjoy doing? Making quesadillas? Making quesadillas. When you get the ingredients and you put them out, your dopamine is starting to rise. Okay, if you're somebody who likes gambling, it's on the way to Vegas.
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#585 - Andrew Huberman
You're walking in, you're getting your chips, it's the feel of the chips, the dopamine's going up, okay? This is a hardwired set of circuits that were designed to have us do things that were adaptive. So dopamine starts to rise in anticipation of food when we're hungry, cold when we're hot, heat when we're cold, sex when we're... Horny. Right. Right.
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#585 - Andrew Huberman
And it's going to be involved in anything that we think is going to bring a feeling or a resource. So a lot of dopamine is based on perception. Absolutely. You nailed it. In fact, in fact, whether or not we're talking about Bitcoin, US dollars, likes on Instagram or X followers, views or any of that. The currency is dopamine. There's one currency of motivation.
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#585 - Andrew Huberman
So dopamine is about wanting and craving, not about having. Then something happens. You make the case. Okay, hold on.
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#585 - Andrew Huberman
So it depends on the quesadilla. Let's, let's go with three different scenarios and we could change out quesadilla here for jackpot at the Casino, sex. Winning a UFC fight or winning the bet on the UFC fight. Being nervous about asking a girl out and then actually doing it. Comedy when you move to crowd work and you're like, this feels like I'm out on a tightrope.
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#585 - Andrew Huberman
Okay, yeah. So any of those things, anything where there's a potential payoff, then something happens. Let's use the quesadilla example because it's straightforward. You have the quesadilla, and it's pretty good. Tastes like the quesadilla you usually make. Okay, what happens? Your dopamine starts dropping a little bit. Not a lot, but you're okay. It starts dropping.
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#585 - Andrew Huberman
Bring him up, bring up a picture of Chris Cole.
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#585 - Andrew Huberman
Let's say, just by way of example, you eat four quesadillas. Each time, it's going to be a little bit less dopamine from the actual eating of the quesadilla. Yeah, the second quesadilla, you can barely even taste it sometimes. Let's say you bite into the quesadilla, and it's like, ugh. This tastes weird, like there's something off here. Dopamine plummets.
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#585 - Andrew Huberman
So how much dopamine you get depends on the anticipation minus what you actually get, something called reward prediction error. But the language doesn't really matter. That's a bunch of nerd speak for when an experience is worse than you expected, your dopamine drops below where it started. When an experience is better than you expected, surprise,
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#585 - Andrew Huberman
It's way above where you started and it stays up there for a while. So the dopamine system loves surprise. Now, all of this is related to learning. This is an ancient system designed for you to learn where are the payoffs? Where's the water? Where's the food? Where are the mates? Where's the money? Where's the resources? These are ancient circuits that we are doing non-ancient things with.
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#585 - Andrew Huberman
Yeah, he's a beast. Famous for doing a tray flip down Wallenberg, which in the Bay Area, Wallenberg School is famous for stair. Huge. Wallenberg, it's a staircase? It's a school, and so they call it Wallenberg. I grew up skateboarding. And there it is. Wallenberg's the third one down there, right?
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#585 - Andrew Huberman
And so for instance, if you do tour, you do comedy tours, right? When you do your comedy tours and like, you really nail it one night, like really nail it. It does two things. It raises your baseline level of dopamine. So the next time you go out, you have confidence, right? You're still feeling that, but it also raises the threshold for dopamine right now. It's harder to get dopamine.
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#585 - Andrew Huberman
You can't have the same experiences that you had prior to that really killer night and get the same amount of dopamine that you used to.
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#585 - Andrew Huberman
So this is like – This is one of the things that made Chris legendary. That and he always had those silly wristbands on, not wrist guards, wristbands. But this is a long time ago. That's a lot bigger than it might look. And you actually have to, now they build roll-ins, but back then you would push in down the avenues.
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#585 - Andrew Huberman
And when you think about dopamine, the most important thing to think about is how quickly does it go up? how quickly and how far does it go down? Because every time it goes up, it goes down. Why? Because remember earlier, we were saying everything's like a seesaw.
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#585 - Andrew Huberman
If you feel motivated, there is, and this is so important for people to understand, especially people with compulsions, addictions, and this kind of thing. The better it feels, the lower you're going to feel afterwards, and the longer it will take you to get back to baseline. So the drug of all drugs for this, to really nail home dopamine as a concept. Sex. Or what? Behaviorally, sex.
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#585 - Andrew Huberman
You're right. And people have behavior addictions, process addictions. methamphetamine. If you were going to look at what creates the biggest rise in dopamine, the fastest. So it's dopamine over time. Okay. Because listen, when you write jokes or, you know, when I'm reading papers, I love reading science papers. I'm like mining for papers.
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#585 - Andrew Huberman
Every once in a while, I'll take a little break and I'm super into cephalopods, octopuses. I'm building an octopus tank at home right now. So that's kind of my indulgence is octopus. It's a little bit of dopamine. Methamphetamine is a huge rapid increase in dopamine. Then what happens? How much do we get off that? Bring it up real quick. I just want to see. It's how fast it occurs.
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#585 - Andrew Huberman
It occurs within minutes. This is why crack cocaine was so much more addictive than snorted cocaine. It was the speed with which it hits the system.
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#585 - Andrew Huberman
I disagree with sex, by the way. I think it depends on, you know, if you're... And people should know this. If you live with somebody and you guys are having sex a lot and you've known each other a long time, there's a lot of the reason why people are like looking for novelty in their relationship, etc., I'm not trying to be salacious here, but new sexual partner is probably about 400, 500%. Yeah.
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#585 - Andrew Huberman
Yeah. And, and I think most people would not dispute that.
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#585 - Andrew Huberman
And remember, the brain is thinking in terms of approach, pause, or retract. So when there's a ton of dopamine, listen, anyone on cocaine or methamphetamine, everything's a good idea to them. Oh, yeah, anything. Right. And then you think about cannabis. Cannabis has its own discussion, its own effects, but very different system and tends to make people pretty happy with right where they are.
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#585 - Andrew Huberman
The opioids tends to make people overly happy with right where they are. They tend to be amotivated, not motivated. So dopamine in this context, what happens is then dopamine drops below baseline after a drug or porn, or even somebody's,
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#585 - Andrew Huberman
let's say they make the huge mistake of like going outside their marriage to a prostitute or something, it's the anticipation, the fear, the excitement, boom, then it drops below baseline. And now here's the real rub. In order to get back to baseline, most people, when they're in that trough, what do they do? They use more.
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#585 - Andrew Huberman
But each time they use, while they're in that trough, when dopamine is low, this is the key thing, when dopamine is low, no matter how much you do of that substance, no matter how much you engage in that behavior, that dopamine is gonna have less and less of an effect, and it's not even gonna get you above baseline. You have to wait.
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#585 - Andrew Huberman
The period of abstinence is when these circuits return to normal. And with the exception of alcohol, where people can die from rapid withdrawal, this is why every addiction recovery program has a period of abstinence. They don't tell you to kind of taper off They're like, listen, this has got to stop.
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#585 - Andrew Huberman
And then when people relapse, the problem is they get, you know, no pun intended, they get a bump, but that dopamine level is not where it used to be. And they're constantly quote unquote chasing the dragon or whatever you want to call it. So, you know, these dopamine circuits evolved for a good reason to drive us toward adaptive behaviors.
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#585 - Andrew Huberman
But listen, I have friends in the tech sector, in the finance sector, you see this in the finance guys. It's often, they're doing Adderall, they're day trading, they're night trading, you know, their friends are making a ton of money. And we also have the social comparison thing. So I'm not going to say that social media hijacks all of this, but let's just say, and I, I love social media.
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#585 - Andrew Huberman
I'm on Instagram and X, I teach there. I learn there. Love your content. Love Segura's content, Rogan. You know, I'm learning there, Tim Dillon, right? Like I'm, I love it. Yeah. But There are elements of this where if you find yourself on social media, but you're kind of like, what am I doing here? Like, this is like, nothing's happening here. You are in a dopamine trough. You're in a trough.
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#585 - Andrew Huberman
You've already gotten your high. You've gotten it. And we hear dopamine hits. If it were really dopamine hits, you'd be going, whoa, yeah, amazing. Cool. No, that happens now and again. But what's happening is the threshold for what really draws you in. It's getting higher and higher.
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#585 - Andrew Huberman
Yes. So there are things that are precursors to dopamine and things that stimulate the release of dopamine. So things that stimulate the release of dopamine, the amino acid L-tyrosine. It's found in hard cheeses like Parmesan cheese, believe it or not. Some people think they're a little bit addicted to cheese in some ways. Oh, they do? Some people think that, yeah.
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#585 - Andrew Huberman
L-tyrosine is a supplement as well. Ooh, L-tyrosine. He sounds like he's from Rome, huh? There's a very interesting hairy little bean No joke. This is a hairy little bean called Macuna Purines. Macuna Purines. Macuna Purines? Macuna Purines. This is a velvety bean. If you just put velvet bean L-Dopa, it is 99% L-Dopa, which is the precursor. It gets converted to dopamine. I'll take L8 ball of it.
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#585 - Andrew Huberman
Remember that movie Awakenings where people were frozen? Yes, yes. With Robert De Niro. That's right. And Robin Williams. Yes, Robin Williams. And they gave those patients, it was a true story. It's based on a story by the neurologist writer, Oliver Sacks. And they gave those people L-DOPA. That velvety little bean is L-DOPA. So you say, can you manufacture it?
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#585 - Andrew Huberman
You can take the thing that is the precursor. Now, if you do that, you'll feel dopaminergic as neuroscientists say. You'll be like- buzzed, energized. That's Shakira. Absolutely. And then you'll feel the drop. And then methamphetamine stimulates the release as we saw cocaine stimulates release behaviors. Listen, I don't want to demonize dopamine. No, not at all.
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#585 - Andrew Huberman
Dopamine is, you know, I'm sure I had a surge of dopamine walking in here today. I'm a fan of your show.
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#585 - Andrew Huberman
And hopefully I will, the reward prediction error won't be less than you anticipated. That's my goal. So- It's already fascinating. So I think that, you know, can you manufacture it? Well, there are things that can stimulate its release. Now what's beautiful, what's really beautiful is when, I think usually it happens when you're a teen. For me, it was 19 when I discovered biology.
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#585 - Andrew Huberman
You know, wasn't good at skateboarding, wasn't bad, but you know, I liked running and working out, but I never thought about becoming a professional athlete. And then I discovered learning and biology. And I thought, wow, this is something that I'm highly motivated to do. I didn't really understand dopamine then. We didn't know that much about it, but I'm motivated to do it.
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#585 - Andrew Huberman
So there's dopamine from doing it. It brings me resources at first degrees and knowledge. Later, you know, the ability to buy a house, right? So much of my life is built around the work that I did like a maniac really between the age of 19 and I'm 49 now just working nonstop.
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#585 - Andrew Huberman
And so there's functional dopamine and pretty soon you start weaving it in like, Oh, I can also rest and have some recreation and that's giving me dopamine. And so our lives are built around this molecule we call dopamine.
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#585 - Andrew Huberman
I think the thing to remember the following dopamine is not about the
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#585 - Andrew Huberman
pursuit of pleasure it's about the pleasure of pursuit it's about motivation the other thing to remember about dopamine is it can if it's increased very dramatically and very fast it can drive addiction and i define addiction as a progressive narrowing of the things that bring you pleasure a great life is where many many things bring you pleasure yeah and then the perhaps the most important thing for people especially if they're concerned about porn gambling internet use
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#585 - Andrew Huberman
You're right. They have a resemblance. He looks a little bit like Greg, dude. Yeah, and they're friends, so that's interesting.
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#585 - Andrew Huberman
or whatever, even if they're not a full blown addict, they're just kind of feeling like a slave to everything going on that, you know, just everything. highly processed foods, all of that, is that any high amount of dopamine that comes to you without effort before it will eventually destroy you. Or bring you close to destruction.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
So something that just feels so good that all you had to do was open a package. All you had to do was take a pill. Or open a website. Or open a website. That is the slippery slope. And if we think more in terms of, you know. Yeah, Pandora's box doesn't really have a key on it, huh? Yeah, like I, listen, I'm not a huge UFC fan, but I've been to a few fights and it's fun.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
And I see you guys down there in the front row and this kind of thing. Look, someday I imagine, given my friend set and given my interests, maybe I'll just buy a ticket and it'd be a great thrill, right? But if I were a kid and I suddenly were just planted there every single night, guess what? You move one row back, it's going to feel like bad seating. Hmm.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
You know, and this is why the children of very wealthy people, unless your father is like a Warren Buffet who insists that you actually work and this kind of thing, the children of very wealthy people often destroy their lives. You know, they destroy their lives because they haven't had to work to have all this stuff. And there's this huge cushion below them. In fact, my graduate advisor,
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
They're almost swimming in dope and they're almost in the hot tub, but they've never been in the pool. Exactly. And then they're down below baseline. And then it takes more and more and more.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
And, you know, I'm not saying parents should- So you said it's all behaviorally driven.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
Well, okay, so there are certain addictions that appear to have some genetic component, but it's confounded, as we say. It's mixed up with the behavioral stuff around that. Like, for instance, the probability of somebody becoming a severe alcoholic, they now call it alcohol use disorder. And I'm not trying to be irreverent, but I just call it alcoholism. Alcoholism, yeah, for sure. Yeah, okay.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
Well, she's got that menagerie of animals like Mona, her pit bull Ridgeback mix. I love, I also, I have a close relationship to her great Dane, Frank. Oh, let me see that. Like right now I don't have a dog. So a little while ago I was like, I need some dog time. So I went over there and he thinks he's a puppy and he crawled up on me on the couch and that's different one.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
Yeah, I'm going to try and stay out of the lanes of political correctness. Yeah, we've all got it in here. Yeah, great. So- The probability that somebody will become an alcoholic greatly increases if their first drink, just their first sip, comes before age 13. Okay?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
Now, some parents think, hey, listen, if my kid has a beer when they're 8, 10, then they won't have this, you know, kind of mysterious feeling around alcohol. That's one theory. But we know on good statistics that... Drinking before the age of 13 greatly increases the probability of becoming an alcoholic. So now you can imagine in which households will that happen?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
Well, where they're trying to normalize high alcohol intake. So it can be both genetic and circumstantial.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
Northern European countries, especially in the winter. I have Northern European relatives. I'll tell you in the winter, they can drink up there and it's dark and alcohol is a depressant. There's also about 8% of people have a gene variant that when they drink, they don't feel the same sedative type quality to alcohol.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
When you drink, the first thing that happens for everybody is your prefrontal cortex. This is like the part of your brain right behind your forehead. It's the part that... sets context, like what's appropriate in different places. It inhibits you. Everybody gets a little more talkative, right?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
Everyone's talking, talking, talking, but then you drink more and people are trying to pass out on the couch and people are slurring their words. About 8% of people get a dopamine surge and an energy increase from alcohol with increasing alcohol intake. These are the people, remember- Oh, so you're in your twenties and there's that guy and he's still awake at like three in the morning.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
He's in the kitchen and he's bumping around. He's in the cupboard and you see him the next morning. Yeah. And he's like, Hey, and you're like, we were passed out, blacked out, drunk. He's doing laundry or whatever. He's just like, Hey, let's go running. Yeah, he's doing, yeah, making a lemonade or whatever. So that's a genetic predisposition.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
It sounds like it is kind of. Well, it's probably adaptive in some, you know, they've got, you got the cursor on Russia. I mean, listen, I'm friends with Lex Friedman. I mean, that kid can drink compared to me. Oh, dude. Yeah. I don't drink. I had my last sip in 2019. Amen.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
And I think, you know, with Lex, you know, I won't claim that he posted that because of me, but I'd been texting for like three weeks now and it's just crickets. And then I'll get something back that just says here.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
And you just learn with him over time. That's just, you know, that's just that guy.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
That's probably Frank. And I woke up at two in the morning, she had covered us with a blanket on the sofa and Frank was breathing into my face. And it was a moment, but I love Great Danes because they think they're little dogs, but they're giant dogs. So anyway, never a dull moment at Casa de Cummings.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
Yeah, super important questions. I'm so glad you're raising this because it's interesting. If you look at the research on pornography and sexual behavior generally, what you'll find mostly in the academic studies of those areas is kind of an attempt to normalize a lot of behavior. There are reasons for that, some pseudo-political, some just kind of the way those studies were done for a long time.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
But it's really important to emphasize that it takes a while for science to catch up to culture.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
Got it. And the reason is not because scientists are lazy or they're uninterested is that doing science well takes a long time. Look, I've run studies in my lab on animals, on humans, clinical trials. It takes a long time, like three, four years sometimes. To get real information? To get a really good study done. Meanwhile- Life is happening.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
And in the last five years, especially, there's been an exponential growth of the amount of pornography available online. The different formats, right? Only fans, all the different sites that people can go to. Free, paid. And within each of those, there's also been a huge amplification of what's called like high intensity porn. What's high intensity porn? It's more than two people. It's BDSM.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
Now, BDSM is its own discussion that maybe we could talk about at some point, you know, just separately about this merge of pain and pleasure that the reason I'll just, the punchline is that Dopamine is also increased by what we call the cessation of pain. When pain starts and then stops, you get an amplified dopamine surge.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
So a lot of people are watching or engaging in what we would call violent porn, right? And we're, as primate species, humans, we have an empathy. So when people are watching pornography, they're obviously not experiencing the same things exactly those people are doing and experiencing, but they're tuning into it, right? They're getting to it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
And we can only speculate as to what they're doing to themselves, right? Typically when we're talking about porn, let's just be direct. We're also talking about masturbation, right? Typically when we're talking about watching video porn, sometimes it's women, most often it's men by a huge majority.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
Yeah. Although, you know, years ago I had a girlfriend, a woman I was dating very seriously, and she confessed to me that prior to our relationship, she had developed a porn compulsion. It wasn't an addiction. You know, an addiction, again, is a progressive narrowing of the things that bring you pleasure.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
It hadn't taken her to the point where it was destructive, but she had the wisdom to cut herself off from it early on. Okay, so it does happen with women, but it's much more frequent with men. So here's the thing.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
We can think of pornography now as like the methamphetamine of pornography compared to the pornography of, you know, we always hear about, oh, you know, like when I was growing up, the playboy or, you know, the thing when I was a kid, like I'll confess, didn't know I was going to do a confession, but they had those like sex education books where they were like sketch drawings in pencil. Oh yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
Bring them on. You know, when I was, you know, probably 14, 13, I was like, this is awesome.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
You know, this was awesome, but it was about, you know, teaching you basically about sex. It was teaching about body parts. And that was, you know, for sure. Pencil drawings. I can't believe we're looking this up. No, it's interesting. Cause I think a lot of people, if you do a pencil drawings, uh, Who knows what kind of freaky stuff is going to jump up here. No, we have a blocker on.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
I'm pretty sure. Yeah. There we go. There we go. Yeah. See, human loving. This is very different than today's porn.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
Oh, if she hears that there's like a dog running around in the street or – I think this is right. Check me on this. We'll have to ask her. But a while back, I think that she was trying to rescue a giraffe. You get these wealthy people that have exotic animals. They want a giraffe or an elephant or something. So she – she'll drop everything and like go try and rescue a giraffe.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
And there was no discussion whatsoever of elements of pain or BDSM or power play. There you go. You know? Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
I mean, you know, God, for a heterosexual young male, the fact that they put her naked facing us as opposed to the guy on the other side, you're like, okay, cool. But you know, the other thing about pornography is that it, it, In a young brain, this is very important. It relates to everything we're talking about today. From about age zero to 25, your brain is incredibly plastic.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
It's modified by experience just by being in those experiences.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
You can literally wire neurons to other neurons very readily. I mean, this is... known for a long time, but it was really formalized by my scientific great grandparents, David Hubel and Torsten Wiesel. They won a Nobel prize for showing that if you take a cat, a monkey, or a kid, and you close one eyelid for just a few hours each day,
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
The brain becomes blind to visual input through that eye once you open the eye up, unless you do something else like close the other eye in order to reverse that plasticity. However, if today I just- Yeah, that's how fast and permanent it is unless you do something to reverse it. But if I did that same thing to you now or me now, there'd be no brain change.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
You close your eye, obviously you can't see through a closed eye. Pop open the eyelid later, you see just fine. So we know that from until about age 25, the brain just modifies itself based on experience. So if you're doing cocaine, amphetamine, or let's just stay with this example, you're watching high intensity violent porn. with more than two people, right?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
You know, we forget that every time you add another person, you know, it's two women and one guy, or it's, you know, what's this woman on X? I mean, I have to say it makes, it gives me an aversive response, which I think is the healthy response. Every time she announces, I think she's like sleeping with a hundred and then a thousand people. And listen,
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
This is like methamphetamine with heroin and you get the picture, it's starting to layer in all these different things. And so the young, you think about the young male brain in particular, young female brain watching this stuff, And it's not just setting a behavioral expectation, because we always hear about that. They think sex is like that, and it's not.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
It's setting this incredibly high threshold for what they consider stimulating. Not just stimulating sexually, but stimulating mentally. It's crazy. It's like, you know, listen, I like playing cards every once in a while. So you go play a card game with your friends.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
It'd be like the first time you play cards, you got a million bucks, you know, you're, or you're back there in the high state, you're in like the Dana White room, right? Like I know, like when I see sometimes his gambling hands, right? He's, you know, but he can afford to play. And he also knows where that fits into the rest of his life. But you think about a
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
As a kid, you have a chance to win a million dollars. Actually, there's this scene in that movie, that show, remember Succession? A show that it's all about dopamine. This family of rich brats who are completely corrupt. Everything's about more, more, more. Dopamine has been called in a book, I forget the author, the molecule of more. It's all about wanting more.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
dreadfully sad scene where they go out to play, I think it was like a baseball game or something. And they bring their garden help and they take the kid and they say, hey, if you can hit a home run, these people's kids, people are clearly, and they say, if you hit a home run, you have a million dollars. And you see the anticipation, this would transform these kids and their parents' life.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
And then he doesn't get the million dollars. And they give him like some watch that's probably worth $25,000. This is dopamine reward prediction error in a nutshell. Had they given him the watch, the family probably would have been pretty thrilled. They could sell it, they could use it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
Had they not been involved in the game, their dopamine is the same as when they go home at night, but they had a chance at a million dollars. And when they didn't get that, it drops them below baseline. And then you see the kid that evening, like sitting around his apartment, just completely despondent with the watch sitting there as if it was worth nothing. That's dopamine.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
And when you think about pornography, that's what young people are being exposed to. So their first sexual experiences not only are quite different. Remember, pornography is about, obviously, people are getting aroused by watching other people have sex.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
Um, you know, I don't know what kind of sex people are having out there, but in my experience, you know, the whole, the whole business of sex and learning how to have great sex is about learning to be in the, in the experience with somebody. And it's a communication, it's an ongoing communication. And it's about being in the experience, being present, not watching someone else have sex. Oh yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
I have friends like you growing up. Where did you grow up? Louisiana. I had friends growing up. I mean, in the, in South, South Bay, Palo Alto was pretty tame. But when we, when I started getting into the skateboard thing, Oh, you know, we drew from kids from all over and, and listen, I'm very grateful for that early exposure. Oh yeah. It's easy to jerk off to, if you've got some good graffiti.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
Oh no, I meant early exposure to kids that from all walks of life, but I knew kids like you breaking into houses. Oh dude. Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
and and see how it goes but yeah she'll she'll pet anything but i'm glad she's got that beautiful baby over there um andrew huberman good to see you dude great to meet you in person finally we've corresponded a little bit but you too man i'm a big fan and i uh heard your name mentioned at the inauguration of the president of the united states and i went This is wild. Worlds colliding, right?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
You're trying to like recreate the NBA final, you know? Right. And that's a lot, that's a lot of pressure.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
I think Dana White mentioned Joe Rogan and you at the inauguration of the most powerful person in the world. And who else?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
Yeah, I think it's a really important conversation. If I may- Yeah, it's huge. Listen, like I said, I'm 49 now, but I am forever grateful to my first girlfriend. I was a virgin when she and I started sleeping together. She had slept with this other guy. All I knew about him was he was like some buff football player. I'm like the skinny skateboard kid.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
A fucking- You wore a cape? Yeah. Like, fuck dude, what the heck? Yeah. Listen, I mean, I remember going into that, like any young male thinking like, my goodness, you know, this is like, there's a lot of pressure. And one of the things I'm so grateful to her for is is, you know, we were able to talk a bit at first. No, you know, it was just like, you're just wanting to go perfect, right?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
You just want it to go perfect. And I will say one of the huge mistakes people make, maybe we can save some, some people, some men and women, young, young men and women, some serious stress. One of the huge mistakes people make is to try and take that edge off with alcohol. First of all, it starts to really muddy all the consent stuff. So you're already playing with fire, right?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
Because when people are inebriated, they're not in their right mind. So the other thing is that by chemically removing that stress, you, many people come to depend on those chemicals to relax and they don't learn the skills, right? As I always joke, you know, it's not a joke, it's serious.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
You know, nowadays, like every young male who wants to like get a little bit, you know, jacked is like, should I take TRT? And I'm like, dude, you're 25. You're already filled with testosterone. They're like, yeah, but you know, and you're like, Learn how to train, learn how to eat.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
And when you're in your late forties, talk to a doctor, freeze some sperm because it's going to shut down your sperm production. Maybe then, but like just chill. And in the same way, it's like, I think there's immense pressure. There's also something that's happening now. that I hear about a lot, which is from the beginning of time, women have talked to one another, okay?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
I had the- Oh yeah, Chatty Cathy, you heard of that term?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
I never heard that term. You know, so I had the great benefit. and the disadvantage as well of having a sister, right? Having a sister is great because you don't think women are weird. Like I grew up with a girl living next door to me and my sister, we shared a bathroom, all that. But I also heard the way her and her friends talk about boys.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
And so from a young age, I was like, man, I can't make a mistake on a first date. I got to do everything perfect because it's going to be the rundown. But back then there was no social media. Now young guys tell me, they are terrified to go out on dates because let's say they do something wrong. Let's say they're less than perfect.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
They are very concerned it's going to end up on some site and they're going to be shamed. And I'll tell you, I do think, and of course I take the male perspective because that's the only body I've ever lived in.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
But I do think that a lot of the complaints about, you know, young, you know, there are no men today, young, young males, like in the twenties and thirties, you know, a lot of these guys are terrified because they feel like everything's potentially going to become public.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
Positive or negative. And I hear a lot from young males about the pornography question about all this. And I, I like, there's one kid that I was kind of mentored over time. I've known since he was a little kid and now he's in his twenties and he's doing great in life, but he's had his, his challenges. And he, I'll tell you, it's really interesting.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
He said to me, he goes, look, you know, it's hard. Good looking kid. He's right now he's working construction. He's, he's doing great. And he said, look, it's hard to find someone who just kind of want to keeps your relationship just the two of you. But he did, he, he had a girlfriend and she wasn't the one. So he found one and they have a closed container.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
They call it, you know, there's like the new, new language or something. And he's like, man, it's awesome. And he's like, you know, if I'm nervous about something related to intimacy, we talk about it. Turns out she's nervous too. And he feels super safe. But he had to literally ante that up because where he went to school, I won't say where he went to school because he'll murder me.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
But, you know, it's like the opposite Arizona State, right? There's all this stuff about people talking behind the scenes and then posting it to the internet.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
And so that drives guys more into the, the loneliness and isolation of porn and substance abuse. And so I'm not blaming women here. I'm not blaming men here. I'm just saying that when it comes to intimacy, everybody's nervous about that, right? When I was a kid, there was like Dr. Ruth and there were those books.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
And then you had this thing called experience and you'd have to, well, that went well, that went less well, that went really well. And then over time you learn how to have the communication and enjoy yourself in it. But it's hard, it's difficult.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
No, I don't think so at all. I mean, listen, text messages, I hate telling people this, but like everything you text is potentially public. I don't care if you're a public facing, AKA famous person or not. And that terrifies people. At the same time, you know, there can be great intimacy through writing. You know, my first girlfriend and I wrote each other letters for years, for years.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
I still have letters from girlfriends. You know, I cherish those. I don't break them out too often. If you have a new girlfriend, you basically got to hide those away pretty carefully. But I assume anyone I date's got those, you know, from their former relationships. And I'm not bothered by that. I mean, that's part of their experience.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
Yes, they're recording it. I'm just kidding. I mean, listen, well, the old stereotype was Girls feared getting slut shamed. Guys feared getting dork shamed, like loser shamed. It's been said by the evolutionary biologists. And they speculate a lot, but the evolutionary biologists will say, A woman's greatest fear is violence from a man. Man's greatest fear is being laughed at by a woman.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
Yeah, I have a lot of thoughts about this. First of all, it's interesting that we looked at skateboarding earlier. I've been lucky enough to get in on some things in the early phase, not the very earliest, but the early phase when things were kind of small and there wasn't a lot of money. at first and then things kind of blow up. When I was younger, I got into skateboarding.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
And you're right. Exactly. And so there's this battle nowadays. I'm glad we're talking about this because there's this kind of unspoken battle between the masculine and feminine forces.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
Well, and there's nothing that feels better than, you know, feeling like you can deeply satisfy your partner and they're devoted to you and you're devoted to them. It's a wonderful, I mean, that's the stuff that, you know, love and marriages and families and to be direct, great sex are made of, right?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
I totally agree. I mean young guys approach me a lot about the porn thing, about concern about like are they going to be shamed on one of these sites if they –
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
Yeah. Well, I think apps that protect people against violence are great. I think that if you look at the data on infidelity in and out of marriage, it's equally distributed between men and women.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
It's equally distributed. So there's no men cheat more than women. It's clearly equally distributed. So the data play that over and over again. You look at divorce data, but you just look at self-report data, all different forms of data collection that really orient towards honesty, because people lie all the time in studies and statistics, but point to that.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
I think that the most important thing really, if we're talking about forming intimacy, whether or not sexual intimacy, emotional intimacy, or both, is that people feel that their communications are vaulted between them. What does vaulted mean? Vaulted means it's just between them. What's exchanged between them stays between them.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
That's right. I mean, I have a half-joking solution to this, but I'm only half-joking. Oh, yeah, for sure. And I should say, I've had some... great relationships and I've had some not great relationships, right? I'm on great terms with most all of my ex-girlfriends, you know?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
Every kid in my town played soccer, swam. I got really excited about skateboarding when it was kind of at a low point in terms of like, there weren't a lot of kids skateboarding. It had gone through a phase of popularity then it had died in the early nineties. What town was that you're in? I grew up in the South Bay area. So this is what now is known as South Palo Alto before the internet.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
And I'm so grateful to, especially one from about, it was a long relationship, about seven years, where she really taught me how to like have the uncomfortable conversation. And I'm still learning, right? And we're still good friends. But I'll tell you one of the solutions to this. Men, Find a good lesbian friend.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
You want to really understand where you're strong, where you're weak, and you want to learn to just kind of relax around women. Be around a woman that you have no chance of sleeping with.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
You know, I have a couple of lesbian friends and I'll tell you, I've always had a couple of lesbian friends. I'm convinced lesbians are going to save us all. God, I got to get one.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
Yeah. And you got to get it out of your head that you're going to sleep with them. Because these are what we call platinum star lesbians. They are interested in women and women only. Oh, yeah. I'm checking a Westbrook jersey. And it's interesting because they have an amazing perspective on men that's from a women's perspective. And they also have an amazing perspective on women.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
They can say things like, she's crazy. Andrew, you date her, you're going to be in pain. And they can also say things like, she seems pretty cool. I would date her except she's not into women. And you- Ooh, that's good. Women can see things in women that men can't see. Men can see things in men that obviously women can't see. I mean, I grew up in a big pack of guys, like-
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
I only hit bull's eyes when it comes to assessment of friends and business partners, men and women. But, you know, with men, I can just tell he's a sociopath. He's cool. He's not cool. I can just tell it's like a sixth sense. The other thing, you know, across the sexes, you know, A macaque monkey blindfolded on LSD has better optics. And I don't think I'm alone in that, right?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
Because we get stirred. It's not all about the anticipation of sex. It's that the styles of communication are different. The way that stories and information is turned into things by one sex, it's like a whole different world. Lesbians normalize all of this and they're extremely direct. And some of my best friends are lesbians. I love them to death.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
I would- We got to get some damn lesbians over here. Lesbians are going to save us all, man.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
Like I have a good friend I've known since childhood. It was, it was wild because he basically slept with like more women than any of us in high school. He's a gay gentleman? He ended up being gay. Wow. Went off to college. He says, He's as gay as could be. And, you know, and the communication, he's explained like the communication in the gay community, gay male community. I don't know.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
Oh yeah. So, you know, we worked hard when we were in high school to get a skate park put in. There weren't many skate parks. It was really small. We used to take the seven F bus up to San Francisco, the famed Embarcadero or EMB crowd. This is where people like Rob Dyrdek would show up back then. He didn't have his show.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
Well, it's just very direct. People ask for sex if they want, they say no, if they don't want to. I mean, that's it. It's a straight up. I mean, the stereotype is it matches. There are some married gay couples, obviously monogamous, et cetera, but it, it, aligns with all the male stereotypes of promiscuous, multiple partners. That's the kind of stereotype, right?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
Grill and cum. You want to hear some wild data on homosexuality and hormones? Okay, so years ago when I was a graduate student at Berkeley, I was part of a study, I wasn't the main author, that looked at finger length ratios and homosexuality in men and women and how much testosterone was...
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
Now I don't want anyone to freak out and just start staring at their fingers, but because it has to be measured correctly. So if you hold up your right hand, like I'm holding up my right hand, my ring finger here is a little bit longer than my pointer finger. Let me see. Yeah, so, but turn it the other way around for me.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
Yeah, okay, so your ring finger is a little bit longer than your pointer finger. Okay, that is the typical heterosexual male pattern. Now, people are going to be like, this is bullshit. Listen, this has been replicated more than five times in humans. Okay, so on the right hand, Sometimes they look a little more equal. What is replicated, five generations?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
Five different studies have repeated this and it holds up every single time. Sometimes you have to measure from that first crease on the palm side. But if we were to measure it, yeah. So this pointer finger is smaller than the ring finger. It's called the D2 to D4 ratio. Scientists are super nerdy.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
It turns out that if you look at gay men, men that identify as gay, there are very few men that identify as bisexual actually, but if you look at gay men, that difference is much more pronounced, much bigger. They have a hyper male pattern. Now it can't be due to behavior, right? You could say, well, they're having sex with a lot more people. Sex increases testosterone.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
No, it's directly related to how much testosterone you were exposed to in utero when you were in your mommy's belly.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
That hasn't been looked at, but I don't think so. There's a lot to talk about here. So yeah, you can put that hand down. So gay men have a hyper male pattern that the index finger, excuse me, the pointer finger tends to be relatively shorter than the ring finger. So the pointer finger is shorter than the ring finger. Yeah, yeah, on the right hand. Good, your right hand is where it's, there you go.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
Actually the photographer for my podcast, my playback was taking photos of all those guys. A lot of those guys now went on to have, well, Rob Dyrdek's famous, has his own show, Ridiculousness, and has done a bunch of other things, Robin Big. Tony Hawk, of course, has lasted through all the peaks and valleys of skateboarding. So back then it was really small.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
See, so, yep, yeah. Yeah, there you go. Okay. Okay. So it's close. Well, no, no, it's a very small difference in everyone, but in gay men, it tends to move much greater now.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
Correct. Wow. And we're not talking about absolute. We're talking about the ratio. Okay. Now check this out. Now check it out. Lesbians. tend to have the same pattern as heterosexual men, which is not to say they are men, right? Believe me, I got lesbian friends, they are women. A lot of people, when they hear lesbian, they think of like a sort of cartoon stereotype of lesbian. There are a lot.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
Trust me. There are a lot of different lesbians. Actually, my lesbian friends recently have been trying to school me on how you spot a lesbian. Turns out there's all sorts of interesting things that the lesbian community is not supposed to give away these secrets. It's kind of like magicians, you know, but let's just say like number of rings and stuff is our like interesting correlates. Okay.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
So here's what's wild. Yeah. The more older brothers a guy has, the more testosterone he's exposed to in utero and the higher probability it is that he'll be gay. Now, that's not always the case. It doesn't mean you have five older brothers, you'll be gay, but much higher probability of being gay if you have more older brothers.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
With each older brother, the probability of a male baby growing up into a gay man increases significantly. Okay, super interesting. Now, all of this is interesting because it shows that there's what we call organizational effects of hormones in utero. None of this can be because of behavior. In fact, these differences are present at birth. Okay. Okay.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
And then of course the question I asked when I was on the study is if I would chop off my index finger, does my testosterone go up? The answer is no. So, you know, so when we think about like partner selection, like, you know, heterosexual, homosexual, you know, I think years ago it was thought that this was, you know, a there were still people that thought this was a behavioral choice.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
Listen, newsflash, this is clearly a biological phenomenon. None of this, clearly. And I understand that, but there's, of course, also flexibility. You could imagine that some people, because of experience, decide that they're going to bat for the other team. Oh, for sure.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
They're trying to trick you or something. Wiener trick. That's interesting. My lesbian friends have never tried to convince me to be a lesbian.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
That's the hot shit. Well, okay. So I can't speak for lesbians, but my close lesbian friends tell me that also, yeah, like flipping somebody for them is like considered a trophy. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. But you know, so the last sort of study in this- Like catching a Bigfoot or whatever.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
I was going to contests where I met Frank Hawk. Tony's dad was kind of running it a little bit like a baseball league. Yeah, Frank and Nancy Hawk. I'll tell you a funny story, actually. When I was 14, I went to a contest at the Linda Vista Boys Club out in the middle of nowhere. And when the contest ended-
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
There's a neuroscientist by the name of Simon LeVay who years ago looked in the brain for brain differences between gay and straight men. And he found one. There's a little area of the hypothalamus called the interstitial nucleus of the anterior hypothalamus area four that is different in size between gay men and straight men. And it's hard to argue that that comes from behavior. It could have.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
The problem with that study is they got the brains from deceased AIDS patients, and AIDS is a known neurodegenerative condition. So there's no perfect study of any of this. I don't know how we got into this, but I think basically we're talking about lesbians are going to save us all.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
But one thing that I think is so important about the work you do, and seriously, one of the reasons I wanted to come here today is because you're normalizing conversations about addiction, porn, sex, intimacy. I think you answered your question earlier. Why is podcasting so big and important now? Because you're not going to get this kind of conversation on a legacy news channel.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
Whitney's been amazing to me since I moved to LA. She kind of ushered me in. I didn't really understand LA. I moved to Topanga during the pandemic, set up there with my bulldog, started doing the podcast in a closet. And she, she kind of taught me about LA and I'd never done anything public facing. Let's start. Yeah, we can do it, but we can talk.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
They're going to bring in somebody who's like the expert and they're going to talk about things from the perspective of never having done them. They're not going to reveal anything about themselves.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
And here we are kind of, you know, like, like, you know, brushing up against the barbed wire of some of these topics in an effort to really talk about them, because this is what a lot of people are struggling with.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
I've seen them on the camera. They don't work, dude. I think they're all just caffeine and stimulants.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
I was 14 when the contest ended, Frank came around and asked me and this kid, Billy Waldman, who was like, they called him the demon child. He's kind of a wild one. He was my friend. If you put Billy Waldman demon child, he'll show up. You'll see it in his face. Watch this, ready? Look, that's what a demon child looks like. He was a good kid.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
Oh, okay. I didn't see that there. I thought I have a visual defect or something. Oh, yeah. Body Beast or whatever, King Kong. But nowadays, a lot of this has worked out because, you know, the drug Tadalafil, also known as Cialis, was developed as a way to increase blood flow to the prostate. By the way, every male...
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
35 or older, this was suggested by the Director of Male Sexual Health at Stanford School of Medicine, Mike Eisenberg. So I'm not just pulling this out of nowhere. Every male 35 or older should probably be on a low dose, 2.5 to five milligrams of Tadalafil in the evening. It's very inexpensive. It does require a prescription. Why? Because the prostate needs blood flow.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
And it also serves, you know, it has this pro-erectile function, right? And of course one has to do all the other things correctly. You gotta be sleeping, exercising, et cetera. Also, a lot of guys think they should be doing Kegels, you know, that thing where you're like, you know, kind of tight.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
That actually will tighten your pelvic floor and block blood flow to the penis and make erection more difficult. Yeah, so they did, you know, a lot of this stuff wasn't taught.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
Yeah. And then imagine that, but layered on top of that is the fear of being shamed by, listen, I don't know that I should, you know, I'm just going to bring it up. I don't know the specifics, but I remember hearing a few years ago, there was a comedian who was like shamed for being bad in bed or something.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
Was this like... And that was one of the first kind of... He was kind of canceled for being bad in bed. Wasn't that?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
All right. Well, and listen, if there was like coercive stuff or whatever, I don't know, but I wasn't there, obviously. Obviously, I didn't read the article either. But I think... you know, you layer on top the fear of being shamed, right? And all of a sudden, you know, like you're talking about like collapsing a young male's existence.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
I mean, you know, I think, yeah, I, like I said, for the fourth time, forgive me for repeating myself, 49. So I- You look young, man. Thanks, man. I feel good. Well, listen, I quit drinking. I never drank that much, but also I've been doing things that I love. I was going to say that one of the things that'll keep you young
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
But in any case, what ended up happening was Frank was like, hey, where are you guys going? And we're like, well, we don't know. I was going to take the bus to Lancaster, see my friend Joe Rickabosh and somehow get home. And he was like, no, no, you guys can't do that. He was like a real protective dad. So he and Nancy Hawk took me in.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
is dopamine really not from pharmacology but being in pursuit of things that you love positive anticipation but i think that let's go into that in just a second but let's finish out this yeah what you were saying yeah i think that you know i benefited tremendously from being open that's with that first girlfriend yes that first girlfriend just saying hey like
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
you know, like she had this like buff boyfriend in another school, but actually it was wild because he ended up killing himself. And that was years later. And I remember thinking this guy was like the football hero, right? He ended up committing suicide. And I remember thinking, wow, I thought in my mind, he was like, couldn't be outdone, right?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
And so talking to her, I remember her just saying like, first she said something like, we were kids, right? We were like 16, you know? And she said, you know, you're, you're wonderful. And I remember thinking like, I don't want to be called wonderful. Like I'm trying to get good at this thing. Right.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
And I think if I've learned anything, like if I could send like a, like all points bulletin out, it's like everything we know about the erectile response is that it's what we call parasympathetic. It comes from the relaxation response. Orgasm is related to, it's almost like a stress of sorts. It's
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
The key to all of it is a lot of exhales, a lot of nasal breathing, and just slow the whole thing down. Slow the whole thing down. Later, once you're comfortable with somebody, if you've got five minutes and you're going to go for the quickie thing in the kitchen before you leave to work, that's a whole program.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
That's like that guy Lethal Shooter on Instagram, the guy who can make a basket from anywhere. He worked up to that. What you're trying to do, is slow down the whole thing and get into sensation. You got to get out of your head. Now it's one thing to say, get out of your head, it's another to do it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
So the whole process there starts with just only going so far as then you communicate with the person, slow down. These things have a real beauty to them because when people start entering that dance and communicating well with one another, all of a sudden, like the magic of biology takes over. And then someone thinks, oh, well now it's going to go back.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
Then you just kind of restart and do the whole thing. And nowadays I think young males go quickly. They're like, I'm gonna take 20 milligrams. It's a dollop fill this out. Listen, that probably would help, but learning how to do this, this thing that we call intimacy, right? I mean, intimacy is a lot of things, but knowing that what's happening there is between the two of you
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
I got to stay in Tony Hawk's bedroom that night with all the trophies everywhere. And they took me out to dinner and I'll never forget. And this is how I got back in touch with Tony in recent years. they had black coffee after dinner at like 8 PM. And I'd never seen that.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
And that also means you guys, because, you know, there's also been a long history of men talking about all the women they slept with. And then that doesn't feel good necessarily to other women, you know? So the real, the art of intimacy is something that we've lost. And listen, I'm not saying that all sexes has this element, you know, sometimes. people just want to get together and get raw.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
Like, but that's, that's a, you know, that's an advanced skill that you may or may not want to engage in. Right. And I think that slowing the whole thing down, like, Hey, we're going to be together in bed four times before we ever actually have intercourse. Like that's weird to look at you while I say that, but you know what I'm talking about? No, hell no. It would have been great.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
This is the kind of thing that can transform, not only avoids problems, but can transform your notion of like what's possible in relationship. Oh, Slow, slow, slow, slow. And then once that intimacy is set, then there can be some, you know, more adventurous exploration at speed. But, you know, it's all about, it's all about slowing that thing down, slowing the whole process down.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
So a few years ago on Instagram, I wrote to Tony and said, Hey, you know, your parents took me in when I was a little bit stranded. And if you don't believe me, they drink coffee at 8 30 PM after dinner, he wrote back and he goes, no way. You're the only person. The only way to know that is to actually have, uh, have a meal with them. So anyway, you know, skateboarding back then I got out of it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
Yeah, it's so important what you're saying that it was all your responsibility. Does that make any sense or not? Yeah, listen, newsflash, men and women, there are women who are great in bed and there are women who are not great in bed. There are great lovers who are women, there are not great lovers. I'll tell you what makes a great female lover. somebody who can relax and enjoy herself.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
And part of that is the communication and also somebody who's tuned into what works for you. You know, it took me a long time because I, listen, I think all young men deal with this, right? You want to perform well.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
And it's interesting, you mentioned Robert and I mentioned this other guy that sadly eventually killed himself, but every young male knows the experience of, there's like this satellite male, you're holding yourself up against this image and an idea, right? This image and idea, that's very dangerous thinking. You know what I think?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
I think that every male should understand that at some point you're the satellite male. You're the satellite male. So you got to get out of that kind of thinking and understand that like dancing, like athletics, like it takes time to get good at. You need reps and you need reps under conditions where you can learn.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
You know, I think, you know, it sounds like you put the pressure on yourself to be like a sexual athlete from go. And like, you got to learn layups, no pun intended. You got to learn that your free throws, you got to learn lay downs, but I look at all that pornography.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
I've been looking at all that porno, you know, and it got me all bent out. Yeah. It's like, if you want to play basketball, you don't go look at lethal shooters, Instagram and go, I'm gonna do that tomorrow.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
I mean, he built up to that. So I think we're using an analogy here and metaphor, but it's just so important that this guy is like,
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
Yeah, and I'll tell you, no, it's reps. It's reps, reps, reps. He did a live one night that I caught really late at night when I was in New York. He can visually measure the angle the ball has to go in. He is shooting for the basket, but he's trying to put the ball in a cone of a particular angle. He's looking above the basket at the angle he needs to sink that thing.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
He'll put a gummy bear into a 16-ounce bottle from across a court. Damn. And then he yells at you for doubting him. Oh, I love that. What's he doing here? Oh, he's, what do they call that game? Game, uh, cornhole or what a weird name for a game.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
Yeah, he reps. He worked up to that. And he didn't work up to it by picking up a basketball, metaphorically speaking, and saying, okay, I got to make this or else my life is destroyed and people are going to be talking about it. So I think there has to be a private world, an intimate world where people can explore in a healthy way, communicate in a healthy way, know it's between them,
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
And then you get to this beautiful Vista with intimacy where you're like, I love this, or I love that. And, you know, I mean, and it brings people together. Oh, I mean, listen, I mean, I want to be respectful to, you know, my former partners, but you know, it's one of these things where you go like, wow, like I really, I really learned something from that person.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
I wasn't very good. Okay. I got put on a team out of sympathy. I tried, but I kept getting
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
Now, of course, as a man, you also have to have an ego intact enough to know she learned a few things from somebody else too.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
This notion that you're the only person that's ever been there is quite rare. And part of being a grown male is accepting that. And frankly, you know, different strokes for different folks, you know? But I think you got to understand, like, we're all here because either in a dish or in a human, sperm meant egg.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
This drive that's dopamine-driven to reproduce and sex, the reason those things are so closely woven and that drives so much of culture and behavior and shame and addiction and pleasure and all this stuff is because it's why we're here. I mean, this is everything.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
And now Elon and other people are talking about how the replacement rate for humans is way, way down, because we have birth control and people aren't having sex as much. I mean, it is possible that humans fail to replace themselves as a species. And then you got guys like him who are trying to make up for that deficit.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
Okay. Super important, specific and general question you're asking. First question as a scientist, I would ask is what was the frequency of people with measles coming into the hospital before there was a focus on measles. Like two years ago, before the discussion about measles and vaccines was as prominent, at least measles vaccines. Back then it was all about COVID vaccines.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
So I'd say, if we were to look in the medical history, because hospitals keep records, this was in East Rutherford. Okay, so in New Jersey, I have relatives in New Jersey, how many measles cases were identified in the last 10 years. And what percentage of those reported having been in a public place prior?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
And his son is tall as well. You couldn't pick a more perfect last name for a professional skateboarder, right?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
That's what I'd want to know, because that will tell you whether or not this is the media amplifying. Here we go.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
Yeah, well, we hear about these things like bird flu. Remember a few years back, it was monkeypox? Yeah. Monkeypox. We don't hear about monkeypox anymore. That was like monkeypox is coming for us.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
There are cases of measles that can be very detrimental, but there's an episode of the Brady Bunch. Do you remember this episode of the Brady Bunch where they all get measles? And then at the end, Alice walks in and she's got the spots and she goes, I've got measles too. You know, when I was a kid, I had the chicken pox. Now I'm not trying to make light of the measles, right?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
Like any infectious disease, there's inflammation of the body and brain. There are cases where these diseases cause serious long-term effects. And then there are cases where it has less of an effect. The most important thing to understand for me would be what are the real statistics of like, is measles becoming more frequent? Is that tied to the shift?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
Because let's face it, regardless of where you stand on the issue of vaccination, people are now taking a look again at vaccination. The vaccine schedules have expanded, right? You know, I'm part of the medical community. I'm an employee of Stanford School of Medicine. And I would say I fall more, just full disclosure, into the more conventional standpoint of this. I want to be really clear.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
I do believe that there are certain vaccinations that are highly beneficial. I also think there are a number of vaccinations that for public health reasons, should be explored further if for no other reason to discover that yes, we were right or no, we were wrong. It's just critically important.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
I mean, you know, I think any self-respecting scientist would say, those are the data, let's look again. Now there's this real twist in the data around the autism vaccine thing that's really unfortunate. And this is one of the reasons why this is such a hot button issue is that the guy, Andrew Wakefield, originally tried to tie the vaccine to autism. He was found guilty of fraud. Okay.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
Now I wasn't involved in the papers or the case, but like that puts a twist in everything because I believe he did, or he at least lost his medical license. Okay. There have been other instances, you know, of scientific fraud, but that one in particular caused the entire field to assume he was completely wrong about everything. And now there are folks like Robert Kennedy, who is a
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
like him or not, is our head of HHS. Okay. I actually know Robert. I actually am going to host Jay Bhattacharya, who is my colleague at Stanford on the, he's the head of NIH. And so I think right now there's a, there's here, what were the consequences?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
So an important thing that must be done. I know this issue is, you know, I'm going to catch hate either way. What's a hot issue right now? It's a super hot issue. Listen, as a parent, can you imagine you have a kid and your kid seems for all measures, perfectly healthy. has some treatment, vaccine or a pill or a trip to the supermarket, and that kid fundamentally changes their behavior afterwards.
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#585 - Andrew Huberman
The one thing we know is, this is also a deep hypothalamic circuit, as we say, there is a hardwired circuit for mothers, especially. Dads can be protective, but mothers to protect their young. So when the moms are pissed off and curious, they are unrelenting. And no amount of discussion about that was resolved because the Wakefield thing was gone is gonna satisfy them. So my personal take is,
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
run the studies you need to run, make sure they're run properly with an unbiased look at all of this. So important because the thing about vaccines and autism is really a microcosm for a much larger theme about how much can we trust the medical community.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
And listen, I know scientists, I was weaned in this, my dad's a scientist, like most scientists, like 99.9% of scientists want to get things right. We are in the business of trying to un-tease the secrets of nature and do good things with them. And yet there are those that will manipulate the system. No one goes into science to get rich.
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#585 - Andrew Huberman
They go into biotech to get rich, but you don't become a bench scientist at a university to get rich. Trust me.
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#585 - Andrew Huberman
Sorry. No. So got into that early and then got hurt. You got put on a team, you said. Yeah, so I got sponsored by a company called Thunder Trucks, Spitfire Wheels. They put me on out of sympathy. I'm still friends with the team manager from back then, and he'll tell you it was out of sympathy. But I got to see a lot of friends turn pro, start companies. Danny Way and Colin McKay started DC.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
Sure. So I'll try and keep this relatively succinct. This is a whole landscape and it's something that is like really deep and important to me as a science communicator, health communicator who has friends on both sides, you know, of these debates. The most important thing to understand is scientists are trying to figure out the truth.
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#585 - Andrew Huberman
They are also human and they're highly incentivized to advance their careers. One of the things that I've observed in science is not people making up data. That's exceedingly rare, but scientists, Scientists sometimes, when they don't get the answer they want in an experiment, they'll come up with reasons for why that experiment probably wasn't run right, and maybe we should discard the data.
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#585 - Andrew Huberman
Okay, let's say one time, when they don't get- When they don't get the answer they want, they will come up with reasons why, oh, that antibody wasn't as fresh, or the conditions weren't right, and they will start to steer the data, steer the experiment. I have observed that, okay? I've observed that a lot in my career, sadly. Okay.
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#585 - Andrew Huberman
Far less common are people outright making up data, what we call fudging data, just like making up numbers. There's a famous case in nanotechnology of this kid whose last name was Shon. He was like a wunderkind in the sense that he had like, it's very hard to publish papers in science or nature. This is like the Super Bowl rings of science.
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#585 - Andrew Huberman
I've had a couple in nature, a couple in science, and I feel immensely blessed for that. Shon was publishing 12 papers a year in nature and science. And at some point, people start looking more closely at their data, okay? And what happened? They saw that the random noise plots, random should be random, right? You don't need to be a scientist or a genius to understand that random should be random.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
He was so lazy that he was replotting the random noise in two different experiments. You can't get the same random noise in two different experiments. So there are bad apples like him, he's gone now, but most scientists are trying to get it right. And yet there's this thing that we have to constantly check ourselves on. This is why you have to, what we call blind the data.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
You look at it, not knowing what condition you're looking at. This is why replication is so key and the big problem in science. And I do think this new administration cares about this. It's hard to get a job as a professor for replicating work. Everyone wants to see the new thing. So a PhD student comes into my lab, they want to study something.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
We rarely say, oh, let's go do what someone else did and make sure they're right. No, you pick something new. So a lot of mistakes of past get kind of baked into the field. And this is what happened in the Alzheimer's field. This is why, you know, one mistake, which probably was somebody outright fudging as well, making stuff up, kind of get woven into the lineage.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
Then other papers get published more easily. And then lo and behold, 25 years later, we say, we don't have a single good treatment for Alzheimer's. Best thing you can do is get good sleep. There's a little study out today about creatine maybe helping, but we're just nipping around the corners of this extremely important problem.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
I must say, and this is not for political correctness, listen, I'm a tenured professor at Stanford, so I don't have to worry about quote unquote losing my job.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
I mean, there are ways you can lose your job even with tenure, but I just want to say with all the bad things about science, the Wakefield thing, the Alzheimer's thing, the replication crisis, the lack of incentive for people to replicate work, I do have to say something very important.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
There are so many treatments for diseases that exist nowadays that we take for granted that were born out of basic research. Scientists in a lab just trying to figure things out without the idea of a treatment someday. My scientific great grandparents, I mentioned them earlier, David Hubel and Torrenson Wiesel did that experiment of closing one eye in a kitty cat and monkey.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
showed that the brain is immensely plastic. That gave birth, excuse me, that gave birth to an entire field of the molecules involved and the hormones involved and why it shuts down with age, how to open plasticity in adulthood. In many ways, it's given rise to this whole field of psychedelics for the treatment of brain disorders in order to reopen plasticity.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
DC, which eventually sold to Quicksilver. They did that also with Ken Block, who was a rally car driver, unfortunately passed away a few years ago. He was the guy that do Jim Kana, all the driving around cities, you know, jump. You haven't seen Jim Kana in San Francisco. Oh man, we're bringing back all the stuff. No, this is awesome. Pull this up.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
They did not do those experiments thinking there would be any medical application, but we now know as compared to the 70s, when a kid has a lazy eye or a cataract or what we call strabismus or any of that, we now know to get in and treat those eye diseases early while the brain is still plastic. Their work has saved the vision.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
In other words, has prevented blindness of countless people around the world. And there's this whole initiative in places overseas to remove cataracts, save vision. So I can give you a million, not a million, I can give you thousands of examples of that.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
Immunotherapies for cancer, neuroplasticity, the incredible work being done on psilocybin for depression, MDMA, which hopefully will be approved by the FDA soon for the treatment of PTSD. Incredible 70%, seven, zero remission rates. The understanding of that drug, methylene, dioxin, methamphetamines, methamphetamine with a little twist.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
OK, the understanding of that was born out of serious scientists slaving away in their labs for very little pay because they love discovery. And I'm not saying that to do to just, you know, kind of say, oh, all scientists are great. But I think we have to be very careful. The replication crisis is real. We need to take another look at all issues related to public health.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
You can tell I'm very passionate about. Yeah. Listen, I text Bobby all the time. I'm like, listen, man, we got to look at this. We got to look at, and you know what? We can't allow ourselves to go too far in one direction or the other. I say, let's not waste any time. Let's take a look at all these vaccines again in great controlled studies. Yeah, what did we lose by looking at them? Nothing.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
But I'll tell you, to say what I'm saying here, like I'm going to, this will be cut and clipped and contorted. You know, I'm just going to come out with it. Trad medias, you know, the moment I started showing up on Rogan, and listen, I think Joe Rogan has done tremendous amount of good for science communication.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
Matt Walker, me, David Sinclair, other people on there, physicists, you know, but then the adjacency to anyone who's asking these larger questions puts you in the bullseye of, oh, you know, he, you know, Andrew's a science denier, flat earth or whatever. No, I believe that any solid field should be subject to self scrutiny and outside scrutiny.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
And this is why, listen, I've published a number of papers and I always say, listen, I'm happy to be wrong for the right reasons. Like we were trying our damnedest to get it right. You can't be wrong for the wrong reasons, like making shit up. You make a mistake, you correct yourself. It's called being an adult. And you can tell that like, this gets my, My energy going?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
So if you look at, if you look at San Francisco and you say Ken Block, this is, I mean, so Ken unfortunately died in this snowmobile accident a few years ago, but this on YouTube is, is unbelievable. I would go to the middle of it to really get a sense of.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
Because I will tell you, I am very concerned about the future of science in this country. Either way, because we've got to split right down the middle and there's all this finger pointing and somebody, hopefully Jay Bhattacharya, our new director of the NIH, God willing, He's going to bridge this gap.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
I'm trying to do what I can behind the scenes to really get people talking, because there's so much shit talking behind the, you know, I hate them and I hate them. But listen, we all got to live in this world. Forgive me for going on a monologue. But I'm telling you, we need to take a hard look at ourselves and we really, really need to, whatever we explore, we need to explore it properly.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
But scientists are good people, man. And I don't make my living doing science anymore. So I can say that with no bias. They're good people, 99.9% of them. And those bad apples, excuse my language, but fuck them. Because they ruin it all for everybody.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
Yeah, absolutely. So two things about big pharma. First of all, I don't have any direct links to big pharma. You know, people think, cause I'm at Stanford, I've been accused of being part of MK ultra. I don't even know what that is, but sounds scary. You know, I don't know. I've been told I'm a CIA plant. MK ultra. I mean, that stuff is crazy. Oh dude.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
I wasn't even born. I wasn't even born. I was born in 75. Yeah, well. So Big Pharma, look, they're a business, okay? So there are drugs like SSRIs, which we will say have been not so helpful for the treatment of depression for most people, but guess what? SSRIs are tremendously helpful for people with OCD. Real OCD is a condition where the compulsion, the behavior makes the obsession worse.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
Imagine a mosquito bite, every time you scratch it, it just worse and worse and worse, destroys lives. SSRIs have helped those people a lot. The drug companies are highly incentivized to keep drugs out of generic so that the prices come down. They do a game. I know this because I was involved in exploring drugs for eye disease years ago, and I would learn from these companies.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
If you can have a drug that goes through all the research and development, costs millions of dollars, and then is used, say, for the treatment of a heart condition, If you can bypass the need to do all the safety studies because you discovered that that drug is now also useful for say, preserving vision and macular degeneration or glaucoma or diabetes, whatever, you save yourself a lot of money.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
Same drug, you maintain the patent and you can't have generic competitors. So drug companies, I don't think people talk about this enough, are highly incentivized to not discover new drugs, but rather to continue with the same drugs and find new uses for the same drugs. That's rarely talked about. That's a serious problem.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
They basically just, they shut down big segments of the city. So that's down at the piers. And then. all this 119 million views, all this aerial footage, why not just jump between two streets in San Francisco? Yeah, my friend Mike Blayback was the one photographing all this for DC. So DC was initially skateboarding, Danny and Colin and Danny's older brother, Damon, started DC.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
The other thing about drug companies is- Because the negative side effect of that is what?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
Because if you look at the difference between, like there are these new sleep medications called the DORAs. They shut down the wakefulness system as opposed to making you sleepy. They have a lot less abuse potential. They're like $300 a month.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
And as long as they can maintain the patent on that, there won't be the generic version because it probably costs, the profit margins on these things are huge because they're trying to cover the research and development they did. So that's just one example. But the drug companies are incentivized. Yeah, the Doras. I've tried them. I felt lousy. And is that like Ambien or whatever? No.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
So Ambien is a problem because it can give you memory issues. This works through something that's called the hypocretinorexin system. It was discovered in narcoleptic dogs in the basement of Stanford, believe it or not. There's all sorts of cool stuff there. But the drug companies are a concern in one sense, which is that, look, Dopamine, as we learned, is involved in movement.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
It's involved in reward. Schizophrenics take drugs to block dopamine. And if you see someone on the street corner, nowadays it's complicated with fentanyl, but you see the person kind of writhing, it's called tardive dyskinesia. That's because those drugs, the neuroleptics, as we call them, reduce the auditory hallucinations.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
They relieve a lot of those symptoms of schizophrenia, but it also hits dopamine in the spinal system. the motor system, and then they have these motor side effects. So the problem is most pharmaceuticals have side effects because most chemicals like dopamine, serotonin, acetylcholine, they're in multiple places in the brain, not just the area that you're concerned about repairing. So
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
I'm not super anti big pharma, but I will say I am very pro self-directed healthcare. This is why a big part of my initiative with the podcast is get people getting sunlight in their eyes in the evening, get some sunlight in your eyes in the morning, excuse me, sunlight in your eyes in the morning, hydrate, exercise, get on a normal circadian rhythm.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
One of the most important things for mental health is bright mornings and days, dark nights.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
Well, we got to get you some of the red lens glasses. I'm not doing a promotional here, but getting the screens dim or wearing red lens glasses in the evening to block the blue and green lights. But how do you even set up a circadian rhythm? Bright light in the morning. If you wake up and the sun's out, get outside, take that brimmed hat off,
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
take the sunglasses off, look in the direction of the sun. You don't have to force yourself to look. Get five to 15 minutes of sunlight, drink your coffee, get some exercise, maybe even do like a hundred jumping jacks, get your system going. Very simple way to put this is early in the day, you want movement, caffeine, hydration, sunlight.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
If you can't get sunlight, you get bright light from like an artificial light. You can get a 10,000 lux light on Amazon for like a hundred bucks. I have no relationship to any of those companies. Get your morning kind of going. You know, it's hard to be Jocko Willink. It's hard. But you got to kind of force a little bit of that on yourself.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
And then in the afternoon, taper off the caffeine, dim the screens, lower your heart rate, do some long exhale breathing, you know, just take it down a notch. And over about three days of doing that, what you'll find is I start to wake up in anticipation of the day. You have this circadian rhythm that learns, well, I'm going to be active in a few hours.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
And you start waking up in the morning at a particular time. That whole phenomenon, you set your clock for 7 a.m. and you wake up at 6.59, your brain is clocking time.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
Everyone's slightly different, different chronotypes. So I do best, for instance, I know if I had total control going to bed sometime between 10 and 11 p.m. and I wake up around 6 a.m., Okay, yes, I can go to bed at nine and wake up at four, but I can't stick to that schedule very long. My system just genetically is not wired for it. Some people are real night owls.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
They do best going to sleep at 2 a.m. and waking up at 10. They just feel better. Try a couple different schedules for at least three days. And then wherever you feel kind of most yourself, kind of like, you know, for me going to bed by 1030 and waking up by six, is kind of a natural antidepressant. When I sleep in and go to bed late, I start feeling off.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
I mean, I think we should mention how, what a cute baby Henry is. That kid is so cute.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
It is actually stood for something called drawers clothing, but DC, Danny, Colin. And DC shoes, right? And then they went snowboarding, rally car, BMX, motocross. all that was born out of essentially skateboarding and BMX early on, then X Games took off. So it's kind of like how in the 90s, skateboarding was really small. Then it blew up, then it dies a little bit and it keeps coming back.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
Then I start abusing caffeine because I love caffeine. Love, love, love caffeine. And I'm a big fan of caffeine. But then I start abusing it. I start taking too much. And then it potentially can drift into other stimulants. And then you're a mess. But some people do really well going to bed at 8.30 and waking up at 4 a.m. But look, the world is not really wired for that.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
Well, him and, and Ari Emanuel from WME, like, yeah, those guys are like the 4am club. They're like texting each other and like up. Yeah. I get texts from Ari every once in a while. He's like, man, up early, he's hyperbaric, but he's, he, I mean, he's got, 12 cylinders. That guy is like, go, go, go, go, go, go. And listen, some people need more sleep than others.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
I do great on six or six and a half. When I sleep eight, I actually feel more groggy. So if you get your schedule right, you don't need quite as much sleep. But before I came out here today, I did a half hour, what I call, it used to be called yoga nidra. It's non-sleep deep rest, NSDR. You just do long exhale breathing. You listen to a script, you relax your body.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
The data show you come out of that with your dopamine level 60% higher than you went into it. It replenishes your vigor. Yoganidra? Yeah, well, Yoganidra or NSDR, non-sleep depressed. And these are zero cost tools, right?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
All right, a normal cup of coffee would be about 200 milligrams of strong coffee. I consume about 800 milligrams of caffeine a day. I'm half Argentine, so I drink yerba mate. A cold brew zero sugar yerba mate, or I drink yerba mate out the gourd. If you're going to drink yerba mate, don't get the sugary kind. Nope. Get the loose leaf. No, I have a yerba mate brand. It's not that one.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
Ours is Matina, which is, I'm not going to do a promotional here, but the point here is that if you like energy drinks, you like yerba mate, you like coffee, I'm like more power to you.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
Yeah. Yeah. And what's in one of these? So there was actually a study just published on taurine that everyone's worried about, but that study was in vitro. I need to see a lot of data. There's a lot of data actually that taurine is beneficial for the heart and it has kind of an anti-aging thing. It's in, you know, a lot of energy drinks. Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
I love caffeine. I mean, man, caffeine and nicotine. I right now I'm kind of easing back on it. The delivery mechanism matters. You don't want to smoke, vape, dip, or snuff. You get cancer. People go, oh, vaping's not bad. Popcorn lung is real. People hate me for saying this. Vaping is bad. Not as bad as smoking. Vaping ain't good for you. And what flavor's the worst flavor? Any flavor?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
It's all bad for you, man. But the gums and the pouches, provided it's a low dose, it's very habit forming, but you know, three to six milligrams or something on occasion, this is the problem. People go pretty soon, they're doing a whole canister a day.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
Nicotine's a very interesting drug because it's a stimulant, but it relaxes you too. But it does cause, excuse me, vasoconstriction. And that's not good for all the stuff we were talking about earlier. You want blood flow to the brain and to your extremities. And so some nicotine early in the day, little bit, no big deal with caffeine to get work done.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
Remember, effort that precedes dopamine in constructive areas of life, writing comedy, podcasting, school, sports, socializing in healthy ways, like this is good.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
Yes, you can. It's just, you need to be more determined and focused on it. You know, remember it's how quickly the dopamine comes in with porn and methamphetamine, cocaine, and all of that. It's how quickly gambling raises dopamine. You know, the stuff we're talking about, work, focus, learning, all that, it's work.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
Now it's in the Olympics. So when I got into neuroscience, That's my official job. I'm professor of neuroscience up at Stanford. I don't currently run my lab anymore. I tooled that down in 2023 so I could focus more on the podcast, but I still teach medical students, graduate students and undergraduates. Okay. So you're still practicing? Yes. Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
I mean, it's hard work, but the effort that precedes dopamine is a completely different beast because you're in control and it doesn't put you in the trough. But I did see a, you know, I guess we don't call them tweets now. What do we call them? On X, some guy made a billion dollars. And a couple of weeks later, he said, I don't know what's going on, but I feel like I'm suicidally depressed.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
And I just said, it's dopamine. He got the reward. And what he misses is the hunt. You have to stay in the hunt. This is like the will to live is the hunt for new things.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
I mean, for you, you know, and forgive me, I've been monologuing a bit because I just want to make sure I blast through some of this info that hopefully people can make to use. But I, you know, for you, right, you've got the podcast. You do your comedy tours. You know, I'm not a comedian, but I love going to see live comedy. Oh, yeah, it's fun.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
And I just have to imagine that staying busy in pursuit has got to be super important to your overall well-being. Well, it's funny you say it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
Do you have a, you don't, I'm not going to ask you to tell us, but do you have a couple of comedians in your mind that like, you're like, I can best that, or is it besting against yourself?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
I'm very curious about this. What's your writing process?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
Do you get ideas in your dreams? Do you ever wake up laughing?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
And I ran a lab for more than a decade and really got into science when I was in college. I decided, listen, I'm not going to become a professional skateboarder, not a musician. I got to do something with my life. I got into biology and psychology and I started working in a lab. And so even when I got into neuroscience, it was early.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
He talks about Ibogaine. I can't take any credit for that project, but my colleague at Stanford, Nolan Williams, triple board certified psychiatrist and neurologist, he's the one running the brain imaging of the veterans that Brian has been... bringing down to Mexico to do the Ibogaine DMT work.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
And Nolan has discovered there are these changes in brain areas like the insula, which are involved in kind of self-reflection, self-body relationship, all sorts of things. The data from those studies are incredible. I mean, these tier one operators, which is code for have to be ready in 24 hours to go overseas high-risk, high-consequence work.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
The number of those guys I've talked to that were dependent on alcohol, drugs, and other substances that go down there and do it once or twice and never even feel the desire to use again is just striking. Yeah, the Ibogaine sounds amazing. I also hear it's terrifying. A couple of those guys told me, and they have a high bar for this.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
A couple of those guys have told me it is the most terrifying experience of their entire life, but also brought them the most amount of peace. Well, it's 22 hour psychedelic journey followed by DMT. Are you asleep during it? No, you're awake.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
And what I hear is that you don't hallucinate when your eyes are open, but when you close your eyes, you get high definition recall of previous experiences, but you have agency. You can act differently in there and rewire. I've never done it. I'm very curious to do it. I've never done ayahuasca. I have had some incredibly beneficial clinical experiences with MDMA and with psilocybin.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
And it's just complete, you know, I don't encourage kids to do it. You need a really good practitioner. You have to find a way to do it legally and there are ways. But man, it is a game changer.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
Look at this guy right here. That's Rick Rubin. That's no, I was saying earlier, you know, that's me when it comes to being able to see clearly along certain dimensions of life, but that's when you come to rely on good friends and, and you do your, you do your work, your inner journey work and figure it out. Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
There was no such thing called a neuroscience degree or a neuroscientist. There was biology, there was genetics, but there wasn't something official. Then came the decade of the brain, and now neuroscience is everywhere.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
And, uh, but in other areas of my life, like the decision to go into skateboarding and leave the decision to pursue science and then podcasting and, you know, my life's a dream, man.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
Like, I can't tell you, like, You know, people will think I'm just trying to puff you up, but like to be sitting here talking to you, I'm a fan. To be able to explore ideas and to learn from such a diverse array of people. Like I love talking to scientists, but I love talking to comedians and creatives. And like my childhood hero became one of my best friends because he heard the podcast. Really?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
Yeah. I mean, it's kind of embarrassing to say, but Tim Armstrong, the singer for Rancid and the Transplants, he has that band with Rob Astin and Travis Barker. I mean, Tim's like my hero and we've become very good friends. He's a real life poet. He's an incredible musician. He's produced a ton of music for others. He's a very... you know, soft-spoken. He's a true music producer and performer.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
That's fascinating. And we became, he's one of my best friends.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
Well, and for people listening, I, you know, I have to say, like, I used to watch and, you know, watch things and read and listen to podcasts. And, like, I wanted to be part of it. But, like, being myself, and that's really the key. Rick always says this. He's like, the way to succeed in any genre that you're interested in is to be you because no one's done that yet.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
The moment you try and be like the – the other guy, you know, or the other gal is when it falls flat, right? The reason Tony Hawk's Tony Hawk is because he's a pioneer and he just kept going. There's only one of him. You know, and there are others in skateboarding and others in podcasting, but like, it's like that trust in self. You just have to, if you just show up you,
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
You did not. And it really drew people from different fields. And then now we have a better, not complete, but we could talk about better understanding of lots of different things, memory, addiction, etc., When I got into podcasting, I started my podcast in 2021. As we were talking about before, it was just a small closet. I was living in Topanga, kind of self-appointed sabbatical.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
and do your personal work too i do think you know journaling meditation working out it's a relationship with you yeah like you and you just show that you just show up you so like you know i think we got the answer to your initial question why is podcasting what it is is because like we just show up we didn't have a we didn't have a template there's no script nothing we just show up and a couple guys in their closets man we're talking about finger lengths and lesbians and monkeys on lsd and measles vaccine and some of the biggest issues in public health and and you know your name was
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
mentioned in a moment of praise at the inauguration of the President of the United States.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
We are living, I don't think we're living in a simulation. I think what's so freaking awesome about this life is it's real. Not that it's fake. It's all the shit that's real that blows my mind.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
I pray every day. Yeah, me too. I'm a scientist, but I'm a believer. You know, I've always believed in God, and I used to hide praying. Because I grew up in a complicated home religiously for different, we've got a real mixed family, but also like the attitudes about religion, very mixed. Some very positive, some not positive.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
But a few years ago, a friend of mine who was a former tier one operator and he's run some of my security stuff, like he encouraged me to start reading the Bible. And I was like, wow, there's so much wisdom here. And then he encouraged me to start praying. And it's, I know people are going to, some people roll their eyes. Some people will be like, get it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
When you start praying before sleeping in the morning, Yeah, I prayed right before I came in here. Went in the bathroom, I literally get on my knees and pray before anything important this morning at night. And you know, people, how can you be a scientist and believe in God? And it's like, well, easy. Because as a scientist, you learn that like, even as a, let's just say a vision scientist,
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
There are animals that can see parts of the visual spectrum that we can't see. UV light, infrared light, pit vipers can see it. Mosquitoes see things we don't see. So the moment you start just thinking, wait, our human brain can understand and make sense of certain things, but not others through logic and reasoning and emotion,
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
you go, well, there's this not just possibility of an entire set of energies out there that we're not aware of. It's absolutely certain. And then you go, well, that's a big leap to the idea that there's a guy or, you know, and his son is the, you know, is, you know, is Christ and Christ was resurrected.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
It was the pandemic. Everything was shut down. And you had a dog. And my bulldog, Mastiff Costello. And he passed away at some point? 2021, I had to put him down. I had to do it myself. No. What are you talking about? At home, I had them come. He hated the vet. I mean, a bulldog's an amazing animal. The contract between a bulldog and owner is very simple.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
But when you start reading the stories and you start like looking at our real world experience, you go, so much of this makes sense and it doesn't make nature and science any less interesting. It makes it more interesting. It makes it more important. It's like, we're here, I believe, that we're here to like, access that energy, allow it come through us.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
I don't think like we podcast, I think energy comes through us and we podcast.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
Do you believe, sorry, yesterday I was in a conversation with a Stanford and Harvard trained psychiatrist, one of the smartest people I know. And he said to me, he said, you know, these are him talking. He said, you know, I believe in miracles. He's like, there are miracles. And I was like, really? And he explained a case of a patient, like,
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
There is no way this person should still be alive, let alone flourishing as they are. The number of things that had to organize for that to work out. And, you know, so I'm kind of obsessed these days with like this notion of miracles.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
And thanks for spending time with us today. Thanks for having me on. And I want to say, you know, the, the universal love that I see out there for you is not a coincidence. It's so interesting, like people can't put you in a box. And I love that because there's so much pressure to like put people in a box. And people really feel your heart in everything you do. And in part it's the vulnerability.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
It's also when you say like, the hell with that and really stretch your wings the way you've developed this incredible, expertise at the various things you do, comedy and others. So, you know, I'm very grateful to be here today. I'm a fan and you just have the love of so many people and it's not an accident, man. You're, you're, you're a real leader and I appreciate you.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
They will die for you and you can feel that. They will die for you. But if your life is not on the line, they're not doing shit at all. That's the contract.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
There he is. They will also take a nap for you. They will take a nap for you. So he used to just snore. You can hear him snoring in our early episodes and fart and that's what they do. But if there was a threat, they don't hesitate. He was skunked something like 27 times because they don't learn. He was stung by bees? No, skunked. Oh, by skunks.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
Yeah, they always say there are two kinds of dogs, dogs that get skunked once and then all the other kinds of dogs. But in any case, we started the podcast and we weren't thinking about, oh, we're going to make money with this or it'll be a big podcast. I sat down, put up a couple of cameras and me and my, what I now call my producer, but my friend Rob Moore just did that.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
Mike Blayback from DC, because I knew people from skateboarding, he took the photos. And then what happened between 2021 and 2025 is you all, thanks in large part to Joe, we could talk about, I have theories about why Joe is the king of podcasting and the biggest media channel on the planet, not just podcasting.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
what happened was people wanted to hear conversation where it's not scripted and where the ads and commercials are things that people actually use.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
You know, and, and it went from this little niche community of comedians and people that like to talk about UFC to, you know, Lex Friedman was the one that inspired me to start a podcast. So he was my kind of, uh, my brother in crime in terms of- Podcast Eskimo or whatever they call it. Yeah, because he is an academic, right? I mean, he has a PhD.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
A lot of people don't know this, but it's Dr. Lex Friedman. So he's not a medical doctor, but he has a PhD. And he was the AI computer science guy. And I was the neuroscience guy, but then I'm also very interested in health and health and fitness. But you guys didn't podcast together.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
Right, oh, for sure. And then it just, you know, the comedians led the way, right? You, Joe, you know- Mark Maron. Mark Maron. And then it just kind of- Pete Holmes.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#585 - Andrew Huberman
Cause it's so it's pure. So the, the parallels I was setting up with skateboarding and neuroscience, and then this, I realized at some point and I, you know, I'll get accused of name dropping, but I'm very blessed to be very close friends with Rick Rubin. I spent a lot of time with Rick. either here when he's in the States or- Fascinating gentleman.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
I just saw him the other day. He came to a show in Pittsburgh.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
So every time agents are scared of losing you, they show up. You notice that?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
You said earlier that maybe you felt like – do you feel like you turned into your father though a little bit sometimes? Do you ever think like that? No.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
No. I mean, Mike is charming. He's done great work for me.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
Let's go. Congratulations. That's my seventh book. Seventh book. That's right.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
Yeah, brother, let's fucking go, boy. And I was like, oh.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
Yeah. Jeremy, I've known him for a few years. Jeremy's a really neat guy.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
Yeah, when everybody was like they were going to war or whatever.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
Like this fucking eight ball Magellan over here.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
Yeah. I was like, what's up with the maps? He has them stapled all together.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
Yeah. Dang. Yeah, I had one night in New York years ago where I was a taxi driver. He gets some coke. I end up driving the taxi. I was so high. This was years ago.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
He was. He picked me up. We both started doing cocaine together. Oh. I saw Andy Cohen in the bathroom in the morning. I was going on Opie and – it wasn't Opie and Jim. Opie and Jim Norton the next morning. And I get in there. I was out of my brain. I get in and I stayed up all night. God. And I get in there. And the other guest on the show that day was Daryl Strawberry, who was sober.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
And I could barely even talk. And I remember I was in the bathroom there peeing. There I am right there on the right, just geeked out of my head.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
I was playing third base for my own brain right there. I wasn't doing real good.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
And they used to do it all the time, it seemed like.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
Like, that's... I think if you practice doing it some, I think you would get good at it, probably. I think it's the...
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
Well, it's the sporadicness of not practicing and then just doing it willy-nilly like some guy who's playing for his refrigeration softball team or something. That's when it's bad.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
I'm high as a Georgia Pine. Oh, yeah, there was that one guy that did LSD.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
What is there a type of, so how much is a microdose of LSD?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
Right. You're not licking people and stuff. You're shaking hands and being normal.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
expending energy you know what i mean and absorbing other people's energy yeah so i want to be in a fucking high vibe mood yeah you don't realize how much it is you don't realize like i would do meeting greets after shows for like years just go out there for just and just do them and it just like i had like a breakdown a couple years ago i just was completely burnt like and i just kept doing it i thought i wasn't working hard enough that was my own take of it i was like oh you're just not working hard enough but i didn't realize i just burned myself to like the end of the bowl you know
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
Did you ever have a time where you got pretty burnt out? I mean, you've had a pretty – I mean, you've had an insane schedule for probably 25 years except for when you've taken breaks.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
He's a great speaker too. He's a great, he's able to speak and think at the same time really well. That's something that I really admire about him. What was I going to ask you about? Oh, good to see you.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
Yeah, that's been a tough thing to learn because especially when you're so self-motivated and you've done all that, you like have always been like, I can do this. I'll figure it out. I'll find a way. It's really hard to start to use the breaks, you know, and use them to your own advantage.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
I came on your show a couple times when you had Chelsea Lately show. Oh, really? Yeah. I was so nervous. Were you? Oh, yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
as they often deny and delay the payments that you are owed. When Morgan & Morgan takes on a case, they are almost always going after the deep-pocketed insurance companies and not the individuals at fault. These corporate bullies know the name Morgan & Morgan, which makes a difference for their clients.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
In Florida, a client received $12 million after the insurance company's best offer was just $350,000. In Pennsylvania, a client was awarded $26 million, a staggering 40 times the insurance company's original offer of $650,000. Hiring the wrong firm can be disastrous. Hiring the right firm could substantially increase your settlement.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
With Morgan & Morgan, it's easy to get started and their fee is free unless they win. Visit ForThePeople.com slash Theo or dial pound law, pound 529 from your cell phone. That's F-O-R-T-H-E-P-E-O-P-L-E.com ForThePeople.com or dial pound law, pound 529 from your cell phone. This is a paid advertisement. What happens when your health becomes the punchline?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
Go to tryarmra.com slash T-H-E-O or enter Theo to get 15% off your first order. That's T-R-Y-A-R-M-R-A dot com slash T-H-E-O. I like to put mine into my smoothie. I just put it right in there and bam, I'm armred up. Try armra.com slash Theo. Was there – you've had a good experience with drugs over the years. I mean you've talked about drinking over the years.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
You talked about using LSD a little bit ago. Did you ever have a time where you went sober? You tried it? Like did you ever try recovery meetings? Did you ever try that kind of stuff or no?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
Do you think, was it because were you drinking or was it just because you were, it was just time was just hectic?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
Would you ever though? Because sometimes life just gets so stressful.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
Whether you're going solo or teaming up with your squad, it's time to come home to Verdansk. Download Call of Duty Warzone for free and dive into the action today. Rated M for Mature. Today's guest is a stand-up comedian. She's an actress. She's an author. She just came out with her seventh book. You know her from her Chelsea Lately series and just from being a force in the comedy world.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I get. Yeah. I think I can't remember if I even had a drink at that. I was so nervous. I remember like some of the lines I said I couldn't get them right. And I was like I was like immensely nervous at that time. Yeah. Oh, yeah. But you had so many comics on. That was like the Tonight Show for a while for comedians. I mean, it boosted a lot of careers.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
It launched a lot of careers. Yeah. It felt like did a lot of I mean, Michael Yo, Chris Franjola. I mean, yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . a Laboratory the
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
Oh, yeah. And I hate to just miss some people's names. Ross Matthews. Mm-hmm.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
Yeah. And I, there's certain things that I like. And then it's like, yeah, I like a lot of my life is always, always about me. I think with comedians, you get like that, you know, that's why you end up in comedy.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
He was he was a big part of that show, too. I remember that's kind of what it because then he had a spinoff of his own show from your show, didn't he?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
And no one else is responsible for it except for you. It's like I don't want – I want to be responsible for myself. I never could – I think it goes back to just that being in a place where it was like, what am I doing here? I don't even have an employee ID. There's no fucking hours on the wall. There's no wage union. I have to be here every day. This family didn't even make any fucking sense.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
Who would put this together? Can I talk to the boss? There is no boss. Who's the superior? But I had to – it was like – so I never wanted anything to have any like – jurisdiction over me, except for me. Right. But then sometimes for me, like it starts to be like, well, how much of that is like old stuff that I had and how much of it, which has served me well, because it helps me be self-motivated.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
And, um, but it's, it's been hard for me to like work with others. And so that's been like a learning curve, but. Yeah, at a certain point, does that kind of hinder me?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
Or have I gotten other neat joys out of the world, like getting to experience, like, you know, people coming out to a big show or something like that, and maybe those are the joys that I'll get instead of having a family, you know, not in a bad way. Yeah. And just trying to gauge, like, could I do it? Do I think I would do it well? And being honest with yourself.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
Well, comedy was something that was pure to me. There was a lot I think I didn't trust in the world. I didn't trust this. I didn't know about any of that. But if comedy, if you could fucking... put an arrow through sometimes and get people to laugh. Even people that didn't like you, if they were angry people that fucking, they might've been your parents and fucking hated you.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
Yeah. He just like I don't know. I could never see him and not just feel better. I feel like.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
But if you could fucking snipe them with an arrow, if you just to get them, even in all their discomfort or whatever, to get them to fucking laugh, it felt like, Oh, that's, that's the only thing that's written to me. It just felt so real. Like, and nobody could cheat it. Nobody's dad could put them on stage and say, Oh, I'm famous. My son is going to be great.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
You know, it was like there wasn't any nepotism in it. I don't know.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
I don't know. I'm not trying to, like, get any Debbie down or shit. But, yeah, I don't know. That's kind of why I think I ended up in this place.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
It's so funny we have two dogs in here today, both chows. I used to live with a chow in Arizona for a bit.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
Oh, and this was a Chinese guy who was a roommate, or it was a guy who was already living in the room when I got there?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
He's like infectious. But yeah, I was so nervous. I got so nervous because I think also like you would come out and you didn't kind of – or I didn't know you. And so like I didn't get to say hello or anything and I was just hyper nervous. And yeah, that was definitely tougher back then for me just to be in like those type of environments.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
Yeah, that's a chow mane, I think it's called or something.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
That's a son piker right there, dude. Fascinating guy. Kaya, that's that dog's name. It's its birthday today, too.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
That's okay. Yeah. Do you think – oh, this is one more question I had about like how comedians feel and stuff. Do you think like it's hard for comedians to be like accept – like I have a tough time sometimes accepting compliments from people. Did you ever feel like that?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
Do you have any insight like on what that kind of is or have you –
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
And they're not wet too. People are wet. That scares you. Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
Yeah, then just being still stuck in yourself, even if you're getting adulation, it's still about, well, how do I feel about adulation? It's almost like an ego trap in a weird way, kind of like, because even though I'm getting it, like, it's like, it's nice to get adulation from somebody or somebody saying thank you or something.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
And then I'm wondering, oh, well, it makes me feel like at that point, who gives a fuck really how it makes you feel kind of like, yeah, you can have your boundaries and stuff. Right. But imagine, yeah, if you somebody must really care if they went over to say something or they wanted to share that.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
Did you ever have a talk show that you went on early where you were just like – or some sort of thing you went on where you're like, I can't handle this or were you always –
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
Yeah. Yeah. No, it's just a good, it's a good reminder. It's a good reminder of that. Um, so the feeling you're special, it's like, um, I only watched like 32 minutes of it, but, um, what is the feeling kind of like, or do I have to wait to the end to get to know what it is?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
Oh, the feeling is about, I mean, a lot of the feeling that I've seen so far seems to be feminal masturbation.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
We're talking about – Yeah, yeah. You can say that. Of course.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
I was like, what is happening here? Yeah, there's a lot of like there's a lot of use of masturbation to get through time of moments, maybe.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
Are you there, pussy? It's me, Chelsea. Are you there, pussy?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
Oh. Oh, yeah. If you see a child rubbing up on something – well, I guess if you have six other children, who gives a fuck what the last one is doing most of the time?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
But, yeah, I think it's hard to approach them even probably. Maybe now you could text them and say – Get your hand out of your pants. Yeah, or calm it down. Yeah, yeah. We're at a pizza hut.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
Wow, dude, that's bonkers, man. Yeah, but jerking off was fun, wasn't it? And I love how in this, you call it jerking off. I hadn't heard a woman refer to it as that before. Really? I'd never heard a woman say jerking off before.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
Damn, I'm not a go yet. I'm a, I'm more of like, you know, a lot of people are up by the front lines with the machine guns or whatever. I'm the cannon that comes in in the back. It shoots once.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
Yeah. And then you're wrapped. And then it's like, uh, yeah, neat, neat down for repair or whatever. Like that's me.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
No, I mean five minutes, I'm saying. Oh, five minutes. Yeah, don't put me.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
That's my thing. If anybody's having sex for four, who the fuck are you? You're some kind of like a mega, you're some kind of like a cyborg or like who's like Italians or whoever's fucking for that long. It's like that's crazy to me. I want to get back to work.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
Yeah, that's like the Daytona 500. It's like how much, is that like the Goodyear pussy? I just don't want to, yeah, it's like I just get, I kind of honestly. Get bored. I get bored.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
Yeah, I think a lot of people are wondering, yeah, what's an appropriate amount of time? Because you also, it's like, you hear these people like, let's fuck all night or whatever. And you're like, kiddo, do not even knock on my door if we're fucking all night. I don't want anybody at my house doing anything all night. I don't want anybody even being awake in my house all night.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
That's a Catholic sleepover right there, I think they call it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
Yeah, definitely it changes. Like now I feel more confident in a lot of situations. Some conversations I still get nervous in, but not like when I'm going on stage and stuff. Now I know I've just done it enough times where I can handle it. So that, yeah, some things do start to evolve. Thank God. I remember being in like a really little audition room when I first went in.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
I was at a girl's place one time, and she had a plant that guys would come on, and it was doing pretty well. I don't know if it was a pear. How small is a pear plant? Bring up a small one real quick. I think it was pear.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
Maybe once a year. I mean, I don't know if people were doing it monthly or how often. Once a year?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
I mean, I have no clue what it's also like a supplement schedule was, but I do know that. Yeah. Young people. Oh, no, it's something smaller. It's an indoors house plant. But so that's not it. I can't remember. But yeah, it is fascinating the amount of time that there's. I think there is some miscommunication there about how long people want it to go. Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
And what do you do in that instance? It's almost like a delicacy.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
Yeah. Yeah. That's exactly what we need to hear.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
Yeah. Did you keep tabs on the amount of men that you slept with, do you think?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
Did you ever do like a little gift basket? I know some celebrities, like if you make love to somebody, you give them a little gift or something.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
Was it harder to date and stuff once you had fame in your life, popularity in your life?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
It was over at E. They were auditioning for something. And I was like, can we open the window? I was like, and it was like kind of a little room, but it was like, and it was windows they didn't let up. So the assistants over there, Matt's trying to open, like doesn't open. And nothing was helping me. I was like, can we open the door? And it was just... It was horrible.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
Because it's hard to practice with somebody that's – because there's not as many people that are popular, so it's hard to – it's like you don't get that world as much, you know?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
Right. Then it's just this weird thing. Nobody ever said anything. Yeah. And these days, a lot of stuff is so common. It's like everybody's talked about everything now. So it's like I think having certain conversations are a lot more the norm than even than they were like 20 years ago. You know, I remember –
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
couldn't get an erection at some girl's place and it was like 3 30 in the morning or something and i told her i had to go to swim practice or whatever and it was early swim practice was at like five or whatever and she's like for what team whatever i was like 28 i was fucking couldn't answer whatever yeah you know just a bad idea i have to go to swim team or whatever oh you told her that you had to go to swim team practice early my coach gets pissed like what swim team are you on
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
I wasn't in school or whatever, you know? Yeah. So just sometimes you say shit like that. I got to get home to let my dog out. Is it good?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
Right. And not only just for you, but for them also, it's like, why create, why spend more time creating something that's just going to be uncomfortable, you know?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
I had some rough ones early on with with so many comedians who tried to get on your show. Was there a lot of lobbying that happened like behind the scenes? Like did comedian like friends like or people try to like infiltrate your space? Do you feel like to try to get those positions? Because that was such a coveted spot to be on Chelsea lately.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
Oh, yeah, mushrooms are crazy, dude. I remember taking them one time, and some girl was like, let me see. She didn't even want to make out where— She's like, let me see your weird dick or whatever. And I was like, because I guess she was really getting the swirls. She's like, let me see your weird dick. And I was like, fucking all right. But yeah, that can be kind of just a tough idea.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
And then, yeah, it's just weird to touch somebody and hug somebody. But it is fun to sit around and laugh or something on some mushroom. That's a lot of fun.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
But sometimes, sometimes having a, like enjoying time with somebody is fucking nice too and not feeling the pressure. Like you gotta make, like you gotta have sex. Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
Yeah. Did you, um, I had one more question. Oh, did you ever meet Bill Cosby?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
Because he would do afternoon rapes or whatever?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
The unraveable. That's right. Wow. What about Michael Jackson? I'm just trying to think. I ask everybody.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
Oh, I don't think that that was I think that was definitely part of his psychology that he was less like, yeah, like a seven year old that was grew up and got super famous and also had sexuality going on inside him at the same time. I don't know how all that comes out. And maybe someone was criminal. Maybe someone wasn't. I don't know.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
But no, I'm just curious as to who like, who gets to run across certain people like in celebrity circles and stuff, you know. But I'm trying to think of anything else. Is there anything else that you wanted to talk about specifically, Chelsea?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
Yeah, congratulations. And, yeah, just thanks for coming and spending time with us today. Yeah, it's just you get it done. And it's impressive to witness. And it's just, yeah, I feel lucky that you came and spent time with us today. Thank you.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
You pick up on it probably pretty quick, I would guess.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
Her new special, The Feeling, is out now on Netflix. I'm grateful to spend time with today's guest, Chelsea Handler. Shout!
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
Yeah, you'll be a therapist at that point. Right. Yeah. Um, the feeling I watched some of the feeling I love, like what's one of the lines you had early in it. It was like, um, even at seven, I was looking for a bar. I think that's one of the lines you have in it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
About just being young. It seemed like you were born. Like I could relate to it so much. Like, like immediately, even though in this, some of the stories you start telling, uh, in the new special, it's like, you are a adult, right?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
Yes. It's I can relate to that so much. Like I just felt like I was born into a place where like it was almost like I was born into like a job, like a job position that I didn't apply for. And there was no like clear rules of employment on the wall. The hours were super fucking vague. You didn't exactly know who was in charge, but you had to be at work every day. That's kind of like how I felt.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
So when you were talking about that, some of the early stories you're talking about, I could just relate to that so much.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
Was there, um, was there moments when you were a kid that actually did feel like a kid? Like when you kind of look back, right? Like, cause I always felt kind of like wet cement. I felt like I was always having to manage myself. There was so much going on, like on the inside and outside. I never felt like super reliable in my own footing and stuff, but yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
when you look back on your life, were there moments where you actually felt like, okay, I was just kind of a kid there, you know, as opposed to being like the, like somebody who had to be on top of everything? Like, does that make any sense to you?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
But it was bad. I mean, it was just, our family was just weird, but yeah, I knew you were the last one.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
I'm from Louisiana. I'm from Louisiana, so not a lot of comedians. Well, there are. Mark Norman is a comedian out of Louisiana. I'm in a space. There's a bunch of guys.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
Like young menopause. That's kind of crazy. That's hilarious. What was like a first date that you remember? Do you remember going on like a first date with somebody?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
Where'd y'all go? Do you remember? Did you just go for a walk?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
You got pregnant? Yeah. Oh, dang. And oh, wow. You did it more than once. That's all. Yeah. Seems like a... Pretty, you know, a lot for like a younger person. But did they – and how did you – what do you do back then if you're pregnant?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#570 - Chelsea Handler
You do? No way. That's when they were legal. Like cider house rule style or what did you do?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
I have some new tour dates to tell you about. I'll be in Chicago, Illinois on April 24th at the Wintrust Arena, Fort Wayne, Indiana on April 26th at the Allen County War Memorial Coliseum, and Miami, Florida on May 10th at the Kaseya Center. All tickets at theovon.com slash T-O-U-R. Today's guest is a stand-up comedian, a podcaster, an actor.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
Yeah, or sometimes it's also just a time cut. It's like since we've been podcasting more, it just takes so much time, and then I have to do it here and Nashville. It's just like the back and forth. That's why I said this when we were in – I apologize to interrupt. And your own touring. So it's like you have your own tour. It's like last year, I don't know –
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
Maybe had two weekends where I did something for myself that I wanted to do that wasn't work Which is fine because I like working but I like working too.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
Yeah. Yeah. That's the thing. Sometimes people will be like, you got to get a hobby. And I'm like, well, some of my hobbies became work. And so they're still my hobbies. They're just more it just like you're just super involved with them, I guess. I guess I could get a nice hobby. Like what? Like think about walking with a friend.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
Well, yeah, but a lot of times you also don't know. Some places you don't know the guy, right? Or if your dad isn't there or whatever. So there's some guy who sets his beard down. He's like, I'll teach this little motherfucker.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
And I think a lot of people maybe don't get as much time of that. And so that's why they listen to podcasts too. It's like, Ooh, you know, a lot of people don't like what you said. Maybe they don't get as much time as that. So that's why they listen. They're listening more to podcasts. I think some of this is why I listen. It's like, Oh, I want to hear a conversation about this thing.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
And so that's what I'm listening to where I want to hear about a conversation that's funny.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
No, they're the best. Dude. Tim Dillon is so original. It's unbelievable.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
He had this bit about the other day on – it was a social reel, and it was like about the fires and how somebody hired private security to protect their – private firemen to protect their ice cream shop or whatever. It was like all these places are burning, but the fucking Maui peach sorbet was fucking saved or whatever.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
Well, I think I was trying to think of something fancy and this helped me.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
I put sprinkles on it. That's like who had that joke if you call something Mexican in front of it, it just makes it so much better, dude.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
Did you ever see a donkey show? I never saw it. I don't want to get involved with that. I have a good relationship with outdoor animals. I don't want to get like that. Yeah, this is his clip right here. Oh, I love that he's... You can play it from right there. It's fun.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
Yeah, so then that guy – so now suddenly there's some guy teaching you don't even know or whatever, and then they get you going, right? And that part's good, but the scary part is then you realize you have to steer, and that's where a lot of people – Just bank right into a fence.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
yeah he was solo for the first couple years just him talking and then my brain i ran out of anything i don't even know now i'm just like a thorough affair for other people's and i was like it used to be i used to have some of my own ideas now it's just nothing you know i think you used to love your own ideas you know i always say to people i always say to people um hey wait were you you were using drugs when we did that uh fraternity pilot
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
Let me think. Oh, remember that thing, dude? Yeah. I tried to buy it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
Yeah. I don't know what happened yet, because the pilot was what? It was three guys were going back to college. It was kind of based on- Old school. Old school. I think it was called old school. Three guys were going back to college? Was that it?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
right yeah remember that one guy finally kissed that hook or whatever and his fucking glasses steamed up remember ernie remember that guy dude a couple of those guys hold on you're underselling you're underselling what we did have we talked about this
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
Well, that guy was a ninja, remember? He was a full-time ninja, you said. And we're like, where?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
We hired real prostitutes, dude. And that one guy.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
I don't know if that was them. Harlow was a girl band, I thought. Oh, that's them.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
I'm trying to remember what happened. Were you using drugs at the time? I don't know. I hope I was. It sounds like it was a fucking blast, dude. I don't know if I needed drugs at the time. That sounds amazing.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
One of the big one asked for it. Yes. The little one. Sure. A victim. I'll say that.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
That's one. That's one. I mean, like we showed up at somebody at a place. We stole that fucking goat, put him on that bus, and he started shitting in the back of the bus. And the only person would go back there and care for him. It was some like he was like a third generation veterinarian or something. That one really white kid.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
Oh, yeah. I think he was a comic. Killian? No, Killian is just the name of a beer.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
Seamus. Seamus? Seamus Killian? It wasn't him. It was a fella named Seamus. I think he probably passed. I don't know if he passed away. A couple of them.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
He had two lunches too. I remember that. He fucking, he did not make it that long. I was like, dude, you can't have two lunches. Because he would have lunch and then wait a little while and pretend like he hadn't had lunch, I remember.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
It was just that reverse – he would use reverse psychology with his own stomach or whatever. God, man, that was the funnest.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
It's that energy you do when you're young too. You get put in a place, you try to, yeah, you try.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
Oh, God. Dude, oh, there's my boy right there. He just had his second child, I think. He's selling TV shows.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
That's when we threw those Mexican cabbage patch kids. They dyed them Mexican because the Mexican ones had been discontinued or whatever. Yeah. How do you say cabbage in Spanish? Cabbage. Cabbage. Cabbage niños. Cabbage. So we had these fucking cabos ninos, right? And we're just like, you have to throw 50 of them over this fence. Like, it was going to be hard for adult men to do that, bro.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
We were humming those bitches over there. And remember, Chyna showed up. She was the wrestling woman. Oh, yeah. And she was all geeked up on pills or something. And she was supposed to, as they went over the fence, somebody was supposed to shoot them down with like some sort of a paintball gun or something. I was like, what are we doing? Do you like winning real money?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
Download the DraftKings Pick 6 app now and use code Theo. That's code Theo for new customers to play $5 and get $50 in Pick 6 credits. Better payouts, bigger wins only with Pick 6 from DraftKings. The crown is yours.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
Using MoonPay's app is simpler than a one-string guitar. And it's available on iPhone and Android. So you can always have MoonPay in your pocket. And if you're wondering, is MoonPay safe? Well, their security is tighter than a pair of church pants on a center. And their support team? They're an all-gender brassiere, baby. They will hold it down.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
Capture the footage? Yeah, it was great. Wow, you guys are a footage family. You've always been kind of a footage family then.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
So if you're looking to jump into crypto, there's no better place than MoonPay. Head over to MoonPay.com slash T-H-E-O, or you can access them in any of your favorite crypto wallets, such as Exodus, Phantom, MetaMask, or Trust Wallet. This isn't financial advice. Trading crypto carries risks, and you could lose your investment. MoonPay is here to facilitate, not advise.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
I do remember driving away. This was in Long Beach. I remember driving home that day. I'm like, I can't believe Bert. I drove you home. Almost smashed that dude.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
Do you remember? We did a nude dance for him. Do you have that? And Greg Louganis is a famous homosexual swimmer.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
Oh, my God. That was incredible. I thought I ruined I thought I ruined ruined my career ruined it and what kind of pecker you got on you there you can't really they got it blurred out or whatever just so we can not big at all okay I'm gonna show you right now and you'll it's probably the exact same size do you remember we took a bath with Lunel
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
I don't remember that. I remember, I think Kyle's mom gave me, or somebody gave somebody, I don't remember what happened. One of us came or something.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
Dude, that show was so wild. And it was like, bro, they paid us. It was fun. You got to be around other comedians. Tiffany Haddish was on there. Donnell Rawlings. Remember Javier George? That one comedian left. He left the first day. Remember George? Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
And this is when you made a promise to your mom in the dark or whatever.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
You look pretty jacked in this. I might have been on performance-enhancing drugs. Have you ever taken steroids? Yeah, dude. Yeah, they just had a new – did you see that a new Steroid Olympics was coming up? I hope so. That show was before its time. They should put the show back on the air if they didn't. I don't understand. After that, they fucked up, man.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
Maybe you were putting things that might have been too personal out there, you mean? Way too personal.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
That was so much fun. Look at me and Amy right there.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
And she had a boyfriend. I think she was in love with some guy.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
You know, I always thought we did. But dude, speaking of what else were you talking about a second ago? I don't know. The steroid games. Oh, yeah. Did you see that Donald Trump Jr. or some group is starting a steroid with the enhanced games? Donald Jr. President Donald Trump's eldest son, Donald Trump Jr. is the latest to invest in the enhanced games, which critics call the steroid Olympics.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
And you weren't there for the first period or whatever, were you? Oh, my God. And you didn't light candles or whatever, huh?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
Get on that fucking gas, dude. Oh, I remember doing that fucking shit, boy. Wait, what did you take? Oh, I took – Deca. I took Deca. Yeah, Deca. Windstraw. I don't know if I ever got some Windstraw. I got whatever I could get a hold of. Test 200. Really? Yeah, Test 200, Test 400. There was some... I think... We would go on spring break. We'd go get it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
You know him from his shows Burt Cast and Two Bears, One Cave with Tom Segura. He's got a new special coming out on Netflix called Lucky, which premieres March 18th. I'm grateful to have my friend the machine here today, Mr. Burt Kreischer.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
But people would always sneak it back in shampoo bottles. They would buy a bunch. There was a bunch of shampoo bottles. So it had this fucking kind of like... Like, soapy, soapy aftertaste. Like, you'd be doing curls, but then you'd, like, belch a soap bubble or whatever. Like, it was really, like, every time you, like, if you lifted up your arms, it would smell.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
When you'd sweat, it would just be soapy? It would smell like lavender or whatever. Like, it was a real hybrid at the time, a hybrid type of chemical we were using. Oh. And that was one thing that was tough about it, but it was fun using steroids because, and I shouldn't say that, I mean, it definitely also had side effects.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
Don't you lose hair, though? That would be my concern.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
Really? I've gotten them before. What? What? Yeah, a couple years ago, I had so much stress that my hair got thin. Your hair looks fucking awesome. Yeah, it's good now. It's clean. Did you go to Turkey? No, no. I went to, I don't even remember where I did it. I did it right off of La Cienega, 50 La Cienega.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
Yeah, pretty decent. They take it out of the back and they just put it in the front. It's like just reforestation or whatever, you know, whenever they like take the plants. That's not me, Jesus Christ.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
I mean, look at this picture. That does kind of look like you a little bit. Oh, no, that's me, but that's not my head is the crazy part.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
Yeah, but it's not my head. I never looked like this.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
That's so funny, dude. That's crazy. Dude, with AI now, it's like anything is possible.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
Well, this is not a before and after. That's a thing.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
Well, this is – Is that really you? This is really me. This is after I got my hair transplant. They put all this – they inject all this stuff in your head, but it starts to come down your face. It's like pain reducers or whatever. So at some point, you look like – Oh, my God.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
Holy shit. Dude, I look like I fucking did a lot of cocaine.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
Oh, I don't know if you could take ibuprofen. I think there was something you couldn't take. Could you take like... Pain pills? Yeah, they give you two pain pills right when you go in there. And then they lay you down and you can watch different television shows. My place, it was a lot of Indian entertainment that they had in there. So it was like the shows were...
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
Fucking internet. Look at this. This probably costs $40.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
Well, they have a lot more joy of like... I love this. I bet I could do this dance pretty easy. Well, this is a lot of people. These people end up working at Disney World, I think. They have a Bolly Disney?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
Can you imagine? No, I can't imagine. But then sometimes actually I went to China one time or somewhere and I had to get McDonald's.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
Damn. You heard it right there, Disney. You heard it. Don't even come after him. Do you – oh, I want to talk about that steroid Olympics a little bit. Go back to it because I'm just curious about this.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
Well, I'm just intrigued. I think we're going to start seeing more. I've long wanted to do a game show of, like, stereotypes versus each other, right? Like, there's, like, Family Feud. It's, like, the Ronsons versus the Hamiltons, right? But I want to see, like, the gays versus the Yiddish or whatever, you know? Like, I want to see, like, dark blacks versus bakers.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
But maybe that's part of – there could be a strategy in there that that's how you do it. But I would love to see the stereotype games. I think that that's where we're definitely headed soon. Stereotype games. Like asshole kids. Like ADHD kids versus – or whatever, you know?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
But I think there's a lot of kids suffering from smallpox versus fat kids or whatever. What about this game show? It's...
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
My birthday comes out the day after your special does. I like to. For real? March 19th. For real? You said March 18th it is? Yeah, yeah. March 18th.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
I think she's getting prettier the older she gets. You know what? I thought that the other day. I didn't think like that. I just thought, oh, Leanne looks so pretty. That's my thought. You know what?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
God, I don't know if people – I mean I guess people kind of remember – I think if somebody got their period in our neighborhood, people would just start calling them a whore or whatever. Like I think people were just – Yeah, people were more vulgar in our area, I think. You know, if anything happened, it was – everybody always made you feel ashamed no matter what happened to you, you know?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
And I think just my attitude. I would have had a good time over there.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
I would have found a way out. You can't. That's India. I would have found a way. No. That's our movie, dude. Cast travelers or something or cast. Time casters.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
You know, I like to save money. I do. I like to make money and I like to keep it and put it somewhere safe. I don't like taking a ton of risks. I don't like a lot of uncertainty. And that's why I do like Acorns. I've really come to admire this company. Today's episode is sponsored by Acorns. Acorns is a financial wellness app that makes it easy to start saving and investing for your future.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
You don't need to be an expert. Acorns will recommend a diversified portfolio that matches you and your money goals. You don't need to be rich. Acorns lets you get started with the spare money you've got right now, even if all you've got is spare change. I'll tell you point blank that I've opened up Acorns accounts for my nieces and nephews, and I just admire the way that they do it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
I admire their outlook on finances. You can sign up now and join the over 13 million all-time customers who have already saved and invested over $24 billion with Acorns. Plus, Acorns will boost your new account with a $20 bonus investment. Offer available at acorns.com slash T-H-E-O. That's A-C-O-R-N-S dot com slash Theo to get your $20 bonus investment today.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
Oh, okay. Yeah, I've been talking about shame a lot in therapy. Have you been? Yeah, you just said – well, you just said that you saw somebody who was trying to teach their kid to ride a bike because I heard something going on out there. I heard something that sounded kind of Mexican or whatever happened outside.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
Before we used Shopify, it was bonkers. It was bonkers. We had that old register system where you were filling it all out and giving it to your niece to run to the mailbox and she didn't know how to use stamps and, oh, it was a nightmare. But now we've got Shopify that helps our merch store run smoothly. You can upgrade your business and get the same checkout we use with Shopify. That's the truth.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
Because nobody does selling better than Shopify. Home of the number one checkout on the planet. Businesses that sell more sell on Shopify. upgrade your business and get the same checkout that a low uses. You've heard of them or all birds. You've heard of them. They use Shopify sign up for your $1 per month trial period at shopify.com slash T H E O all lowercase.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
Go to shopify.com slash T H E O to upgrade your selling today. Shopify.com slash Theo. What does the future hold for your business? Well, if you ask nine experts, you'll get 10 answers. Bull market, bear market, raccoon market. Rates will rise or fall. Inflation's up, inflation's down. Can someone please invent a crystal ball?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
Until then, over 41,000 businesses have future-proofed their business with NetSuite by Oracle. the number one cloud ERP, bringing accounting, financial management, inventory, HR into one fluid platform. I admire this type of software that helps you keep things together, makes things easier, and lets you spend more time focusing on what's truly important to you.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
Yeah. Yeah. I heard, like, something kind of Mexican happened outside earlier, and I was like, oh, I wonder what's going on, but – I'm not going to get involved. I got to work right now. But you came in, you said you saw a mom teaching a kid to ride a bike. Yeah. And you were going to get involved. I wanted to get involved. Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
If I had needed this product, it's what I'd use. And maybe someday we will. Whether your company is earning millions or even hundreds of millions, wow, NetSuite helps you respond to immediate challenges and seize your biggest opportunities. Speaking of opportunity, download the CFO's Guide to AI and Machine Learning at netsuite.com slash T-H-E-O.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
The guide is free to you at netsuite.com slash Theo. That's right, netsuite.com slash Theo. Are you going to do more movies? Did you like it? We're making our movie right now. You just made it. We've still got five days left. Oh, for real? Yeah. I didn't know that. I don't know. We'll see. I am happy that we did it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
Oh, for sure. Really? I think there's some of that I'm still learning. Just like certain like ways to like do the script differently to like certain have less scripts. We'd have more time to shoot certain scenes. Like that's one thing. It's like we just kind of run out of time, you know, so it's like we can't. You know, so, you know, you can only get so much coverages or whatever. What else?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
I don't know if I would ever do the acting again. I would like to do the producing or writing. But I do. I only like to. I'm the same. I just only want to do things that I that I am in control of. Right. Yes. Because for me, it's just I don't want somebody else to have control of how I look or seem. I don't want somebody else to have a say. I don't want anybody to have any ownership over my voice.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
That's it for me. It's like when I was a kid, I felt like I couldn't speak up for myself or something like that. I don't know what it is. But internally, somewhere in there, that's what it is for me. So it's like I don't want to have to say anybody else's lines. I just want to do what I want to do. And if I live or die on that, then that's fine. But at least it's.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
No, I don't do anything. I only do our own stuff. Like I don't ever do anything that I don't, I don't ever do anything else except for like our own things. So me and Spade wrote that movie. I knew that he's a great actor, one of the funniest guys I know. So he would be able to carry it. I'm like the second guy who like is kind of we're just it's like a dumb buddy movie.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
And so I never put myself in a position where somebody have to be like, you have to do something like this, you know, because goes back to your reason. I learned I don't do well in that situation like that. You know, I tried to do a – Chris Pratt had asked me to be in a movie years ago, and I had to leave once I got there because once I – they didn't give you the script until you got there.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
And so once I got the script and stuff, I realized, oh, this isn't – it just doesn't fit for me. It doesn't work with who I want to be.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
Oh, it definitely was hard. It was a hard, like, you know, text to send. I sent it all in caps so they would know I was serious about it or whatever. But, yeah, it was fucking – Wait, what – Did the movie come out? Huh? What movie was it? Yeah, Tomorrow War. Was that movie The Tomorrow War?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
And when I watched it back, I ended up realizing I made the best choice for myself. It took 12 weeks. Wait, with Tom Cruise? Dude, that's damn Chris Pratt, brother.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
Yeah, it's a new, yeah. Huh. The Tomorrow War. What was that about? It's about... On Amazon? People went in the past. I can't even remember. It was kind of confusing. But it was great. It was fun. I'm glad that I got to do it. Sorry, I'm glad I didn't get to do it. Jesus. But I saw Chris.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
Just somewhat they just moved the lines over to some other guy.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
Yeah, that was the thing. It was a long time, and it was in Atlanta. And also, I didn't know anybody on the set except for Marilyn Reiska was there. And I'd met only Chris Pratt just through Instagram messages, so I'd never met him. So that's an easy text to send in. Yeah, it was chill. And I actually did call the director, too. And I called him and just shared our thought.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
And they were cool about it. But then there was a thing in Hollywood, like, this guy might back out of your movie. So I was like, I don't fucking care, dude. As long as I was cool with Chris and everything was fine, it was fine with me. But that's when I realized, oh, I can't do something if it's not my own thing. And I'm not going to be able to say...
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
Yeah, I think it's, I'm trying to think a little bit more about it. I mean, this was like, I just remember thinking, because we wrote it and then we, nobody wanted to direct it. Nobody wanted to help us with it. No agent, no producers.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
And also like they don't want, I don't know if they don't want certain people to have voices. It seemed easier for other people to make movies, right? I'll say that.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
Yeah. It seemed easier for other people to make movies.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
Yeah, I think. Well, I just think it was like, well, we have to do is like, I don't like thinking that. If you say I can't do it, there's a part of me that wants to just show you that I can do it, right? Like, I'm not a great actor, right? I know that, and that's fine with me. I wouldn't say that. I wouldn't say that.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
That's sweet of you. It was easier for me to play like a disgruntled person kind of than I think a... like a dumb buddy kind of thing. It's for some reason I've felt like that, but then also I'm like going back and looking at the things and I'm like thinking of what else needs to be in this scene. I like my mind's kind of like all over the place, but I do think that it's funny.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
The script is super funny. I'm curious to see how it was shot, how that plays out and stuff. So, and I'm just glad that I think when I look back on my life, you know, I'll be glad that I got to do a movie with David Spade and yeah, And it's like, yeah, we funded ourselves. We funded ourselves. We did it all. It's like, it was crazy.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
Yeah, I was there. You were there? No, I was there for the 50th. I was there Friday and Saturday night.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
Did you see that? I saw the skit with Eddie Murphy and Tracy Morgan. Black Jeopardy, you mean?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
Yeah. Yeah, I saw this right here. Yeah. Leslie Jones. See the name Tracy underneath it? Oh, now I get it. Oh, yeah. I didn't know what he was doing. I just thought he was doing Tracy Chapman or whatever.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
Yeah. That's what I felt like. I was like, I just, I have to do it. And we made it ourselves. It's like, we made it. It's like, we don't have anybody telling us what to do. And that's what I realized.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
I was like, Oh, if I, if we say it went in the script and it went in the script and then went on the screen, if I had to go through a beat on a set to go ask somebody for permission to do it that way, then I wouldn't be able to do it. Right. I just, I wouldn't, I did like you're saying, I just know it would not react well with me viscerally. And,
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
Yeah, I couldn't have, especially when you see a lot of the funny... But also, I got to see how this thing is, how it looks when it's done. I have no fucking clue. The script is super funny. We put all our own jokes in it. We wrote it for two years. We definitely...
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
so but i have no clue how it goes from doing the scenes which are all done out of order to then it being an actual you know how it like that i cannot my brain can't matric or like figure all that out like um but we had some funny yeah like nate diaz has a role i saw nate posted about it today Tim Dillon plays the manager. Bobby Lee. Bobby Lee came in and did a guest star. William McCullough.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
William Montgomery. Casey Rockett, some of the Kill Tony guys. And there's some other also great actors and stuff, but then we also didn't want to overdo it and have everybody you knew. There's Spady right there. And Nate Diaz, dude, fucking hilarious.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
Oh, yeah, that was cool, dude. That was so much fun. And I think I'll look back and be like, man, this thing cost you a ton of money, and it wasn't worth it. But, man, you had a fucking good time.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
There's Chris Avila right there. That's Nate's buddy. Um, but it's, I mean, it's a real movie. Like when you're there, you're like, damn, this is a real movie. Yeah. And I have one thing I got on set was ice bath and sauna. Really? There's a portable company and, And they have ice bath and sauna and they bring it and they set it up right there. For real?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
And that was like the one thing because I knew I wasn't going to be able to go to a ton of AA meetings. So I was like, I'm going to have to have something to like hijack my system to like help me. So I don't, you know, you know, or shot a place up. Never. But it's like you don't want to get there in front of a bunch of people, you know, especially around your friends.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
You're afraid to quit drinking because then if you relapse and you'll have let everybody down.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
where you see people losing weight and suddenly it feels like the person that's been inside them is finally coming out to play or whatever. You start to see that coming to the surface, like a fish coming to the surface, you know? Sometimes. Sometimes you see that.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
Damn, dude, who picked the therapist? That's the thing that happens a lot of times is with couples, I think you get, if you pick the therapist and it's almost like that's your, you have like, you know, like the insider trading on the referees or whatever, you know? Yeah, yeah, yeah. She picked the therapist. She did?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
Oh, yeah. I knew a guy like that. He used to clean the pool over at my friend's house. And one time I was there catching some rays, and he shows up, and I hadn't seen him in forever, and he'd lost 170 pounds or something. This dude comes in, and he's walking around the pool, and I'm like, and he's kind of looking at me, but he didn't say anything because I knew the fat pool guy.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
I knew him well. So you're looking for the fat pool guy. Maybe it's his brother or his son, or maybe they got a new guy. Yeah. I didn't say anything to the dude. So we're out there around each other for like 45 minutes. Didn't say anything. And then later that evening, I was like, man, you guys got a new pool guy. And they're like, no, that's the same guy. He lost 190 pounds.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
Like, yeah, we got a game on Thursday. Like, I'm going to polish off a few before I go into practice. That's what I'm going to do. If Blackberry's really made you black.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
Yeah, trying to say, yeah, got to cut some corners.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
It's just for fun. What's up with all those hot dogs? I don't know. Dude, what about being the first gay dude ever? It must have been crazy. Because imagine, everybody's straight, right? And you wake up or something happens, you get hit by lightning or whatever. And suddenly you're gay and you're like, oh my God. Like you're just talking to your buddy who you've talked to every day for years.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
And you're just like thinking like, I'm going to stuff his fucking face with some wiener. And you're like, what? And and then you like don't like imagine that because then you have to take some other guy aside or somebody aside and be like, hey, this is going to seem totally crazy to you guys. But I keep thinking about coming on Jacob or whatever, you know? And people are like, what?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
And was it weird? And one of the things they said in there was that you got to let people do their thing.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
I want to like, I just, I get, I felt like I've done too much. Just looking at you. Like if I look at you, I'm like, oh fuck, I got to sit down for a minute.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
Yeah, like why do I get my ass beat just because you're being gay or whatever?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
Oh, yeah, to see who they are? Yeah, dude, I think in the future you'll be able to know immediately if somebody's gay. My buddy's dad used to get, he'd get like the hiccups if people were gay. Isn't that crazy? Yeah, like allergic to gay people? No, he would just have like a, he would just like, he'd be like, and he. Like an allergy? Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
Yeah, stand on your head on your head quick quick quick quick either that or you're getting the fuck out of here Stand on your head or somebody's gay, dude It's just so crazy that being gay was always like the funniest thing though to to people like, you know Yeah, it's funny.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
I love it. I love it. I love... I used to do this thing where I would pull my nuts up over my wiener, right? That's not where I thought you were going with that. You're kind of laying on your back, nuts up over your wiener, kind of wrap your wiener up. So it almost looks like a...
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
half like a baby head coming out of your body right and you'd be like i'm having a baby or whatever you know yeah and um and then people will be like what the fuck are you doing you have to fucking kind of run off and hide or whatever wait what the fuck are you doing we're the library what the fuck Oh, dude, there was nothing more crazy than being at the fucking library when you were a kid.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
It was basically just like, it was like a couple thousand square feet of you hiding from a lady who's like obsessed with Voltaire or whatever. And you and your friends were just in there being loud. There was like one other person in a wheelchair in there. It like never made any fucking sense. They're just in there like in the, they're just like wandering the halls of the old internet or whatever.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
The library was always ridiculous, I felt like. What was I going to ask you about? Oh, so yeah, I wonder if people would watch the stairway to Olympics or if it would be too much for people.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
Because you're going to get people that are going to be risky. No, but why even have the regular Olympics? Well, regular Olympics are regular. You know, the playing field is even. Playing field is even when you use drugs.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
But I just worry about the ramification. But I guess if they want to do it, but you're going to blow your body out.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
Yeah, well, I mean, it's just crazy. Yeah, I guess you hear something you want to go see. You want to be a part of it. You want to know what's going on.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
But they were pretty jacked. They were on something. Their heads were growing. That's the thing. It's like if you got – My head's growing. Your head is?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
Well, that's the thing, dude. It's like if you start getting on the drugs, then like you're going to have a lot of forehead monsters out there just wandering around, you know, just fucking – I just wonder what type of intention is jumping into the stands and fucking punching their wife or something. Like you're going to have shit like just, it's just going to get pretty intense.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
Somebody throw the javelin out in the fucking parking lot or whatever.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
Human growth hormone is a crazy one. You show up and their hands are bigger and shit and they're fucking, they can catch a fish. They can just easily catch a fish and shit.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
Look at him. Yeah, it's like you're not even, it's like, but your skeleton and stuff grows. That's the thing, dude. Or what if then they had like the fasting games? It's like people that haven't eaten in months or whatever, and they have to do the Olympics, and it's just like going up two stairs or whatever. I pitched it for UFC.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
Or getting out of a blanket fully, but you haven't eaten in like months, and you're just so, you have no energy. I like that. I want more of an ASMR type of game.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
Oh, I think Izzy would beat the ever-living shit out of both of you guys. To be honest, first of all.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
Because it's really just taking both of you guys, your current levels, giving you each 12 beers.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
oh no i just didn't what the best thing that happened from that was at like 11 30 or midnight i was like i'm fucking heading home so you just didn't end up like in the retardation hours you know you didn't end up fucking you know sneaking into somebody's house through an air vent or some fucking shit or some dude tricking trying to trick you into being gay or whatever you know i'm so glad when i hear you talk like that i go i definitely don't have a problem
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
I would've been fucking destroyed this man is so fucking Strong and so quick and just bigger Yeah, I think they'll just forgive wrap you like they work at the mall at that place where you get that nice wrapping or whatever He'll fucking tie you up with his feet. I'd be crazy if he gift wrapped you with his own feet I You guys have a 5K coming up, I saw. Oh, yeah, Two Bears 5K.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
Are you going to run? I'm not going to run this year. Why not? I just can't do it. Why? I just don't think I could do it. Yeah, you could. I don't know. Theo. And Jelly Roll's on it, though. Dude, I saw Jelly Roll. Is Tom on a Zimbic, do you think? Is Tom on a Zimbic? I don't know. Huh?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
Wow, so he's really locked in on that. He's really locked in. I saw Jelly Roll two nights ago.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
They look happy. You look immensely fucking scared of getting some results back.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
He looks so, man, I saw him the other night. I literally grabbed his face and I was like, oh my God. He looks great.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
Taylor's so lean now. Somebody said he's modeling or something.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
Yeah, totally. He said he got all the small things tattooed right above his cock, too.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
You could do it. Oh, I could do it. Yeah, I know. I could do it. Right. Well, here's what happened to me. I broke my toe like probably three weeks ago. So I'm dealing with that right now. Big toe. Second from the right. The one next to the little piggy or whatever. And what foot? Right foot. Second from the right.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
Oh, dude, have you seen – there's a great meth tribute video where – A guy shows up through a floor air vent in somebody's trailer. That shit was something else. Dude, when I was a kid, my buddy Jeff, he had a lot of violent tendencies or whatever.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
Yeah. I broke it, dude, and so it's been miserable. There's so many things I haven't been able to do. What do you do for working out? I do a lot of yoga right now, and then I'll just do circuit training, but find four exercises, do four reps of them, and do that four times, and then I'll do three blocks of those. But this past three weeks has been miserable.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
Dude, it's unbelievable. I was like, you've got to be kidding me. You can't hardly do anything. I can't even push off into a good hug with anybody. People are like, you can't even fucking hug or whatever, you pussy or whatever, you hug pussy.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
Testosterone, testosterone, testosterone. Testosterone helps, huh? Oh, so reparative. What the fuck am I doing?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
You can't really see it. They just kind of put it in there. And I think my hair that I lost because of stress actually grew back. I think I just had so much stress.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
Somebody save me. You had also my favorite musician right now, one of anyway, Stephen Wilson Jr. was on your podcast. Oh, great to see you.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
He's the best, dude. He is really great. I'm a song. I'm a song. I know you love that one. I've listened to that one a couple times. It's not my favorite. Are you serious? I've listened to it because I know you like it. Yeah. I've listened to it. And I know how much you love it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
I don't know what happened to him, but he would get so angry, his parents would send him to his room, and he would beat the drywall out of the walls in his room. And every year for Christmas, they would get the drywall redone in his room. Oh, that's very sweet of him. And he would listen to that song, you gotta keep them separated. Dun, dun, dun, dun, dun.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
You gotta listen to them. No, my best friend Scott loves them, but I haven't listened to them that much.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
He took me fishing one day, too. He's such a special guy. For real? Yeah, he's just the most, he's so normal. He's so not a celebrity, or, you know, he's just a normal guy.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
I think I don't like the celebrity part of it. I don't see a lot of value in it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
I'm friends with her boyfriend. Really? Connor, yeah. Connor Clark? No, Connor. It would be crazy. It would be illegal, it sounds like. Connor McCaffrey. Wait, hold on.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
No, I don't think they're related. But we went up to watch Caitlin, me, and Caleb, and then that's how we met Connor.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
Wild Ones. I got a wide open, got a 45 on a man with him about 102. Always smoking something, got me worried about nothing, and he ain't got nothing to lose.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
What did you think of the Super Bowl halftime show? The Super Bowl halftime show, I tweeted about it that I thought it was boring, right? And I only know like... I'm not a big Kendrick listener, right? And then a couple days ago, I ended up taking down my tweet, actually. I just felt like, well, I guess I felt like, why am I judging this? I don't fucking know. You know what I'm saying?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
I think sometimes you forget that people could make a big deal out of you tweet something that you can't just say fucking whatever you want without some people having reactions to it, maybe.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
I know that sucks, right? Yeah. Right. I thought about that. But then I also – no, I just thought about like why am I – I think like two days ago I was like why am I – why am I judging this guy? And then people are going to judge me. Like, what kind of energy am I really creating? I don't think that's what I thought when I was tweeting it. I was just like, oh, this is fucking, you know.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
It didn't feel like it was for me. I don't know. I didn't know enough of his songs.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
I remember he shot those Pepsis up when that fellow was drinking them gay Pepsis or whatever. He's got... You know what I'm talking about?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
Oh, it would have been sick. But then somebody – I thought that too. Somebody brought to my attention. But most of the people in New Orleans aren't at the game probably. It's a lot of people from out of town. So then it's like – Yeah, it's interesting. Do you celebrate the city? What is the real goal of whoever they put out there or why they put certain stars?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
But then I thought, well, also a lot of the athletes are black. They may all – Kendrick might be one of their favorites just because I haven't listened to a lot of Kendrick except for the mainstream stuff. It doesn't mean I don't – You know, that I wouldn't like it. I don't know. I guess I probably wanted something more that a basic white guy would want. Bruno Mars. Jelly Roll, Bruno Mars.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
Maybe if they'd have done some music over the years. But I think sometimes you forget that just because you do it. If it wasn't me tweeting, nobody would have probably shared it or given a fuck. Yeah. And I don't mean that in a way like an ego way. But sometimes you're just tweeting shit just thinking like, this is what I think. Nobody's going to care.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
I think we did. Oh, yeah, actually we did. I just couldn't. Oh, yeah, we did. I couldn't go home for the Super Bowl because I had to do that movie. God damn it. That's right. I did ask you. I wanted to be there.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
Yeah, fuck that guy. I mean, it's always something that's going to make you feel some type of way, I guess. And then it's like, I don't know. I mean, but then I was like, why do I fucking care? And who needs to hear my opinion?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
Yeah, I did get pushback about it, which I didn't really understand. If anybody invited me to go to the inauguration, dude, people on the street where I grew up, nobody's ever going to the inauguration. Nobody from my fucking street, my neighborhood is ever going to the inauguration, probably ever. Some of these people cannot legally vote anymore. So the simple fact that I got to go, right?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
Bobby Kennedy is a friend of mine. Bobby Kennedy is a sweet dude. People are like, I'm going to support my fucking friend. I don't care if they're – if I have a friend that went to jail for even something serious, I would still go and – you know, maybe speak on their behalf sometimes or take them bread or whatever, you know, like I'm going to be supportive.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
So yeah, some of that shit, but I would never hold it against somebody if they went to an inauguration. So then I got to start thinking, well, that's just odd of that person. Some of that's on them, you know, like I've even had friends that I've texted and they'll be like, Oh, it's a, didn't know you were so MAGA or whatever. And it was like, I've never ever in my life thought of myself as MAGA.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
And I was like I'm not going to – Yeah, I wouldn't – I think I got invited as that too. I wouldn't go to – I wouldn't do something like that.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
I thought it was cool shit. Yeah. I wouldn't go to support like one party. You know what I'm saying? Like if somebody, like I got asked to do some Republican stuff like that, I wouldn't go do that, you know? Um, and we just got lucky with that too. We come on our podcast was, uh, Vance and Trump. Everybody got asked. Everybody was in, everybody was emailing with us, but they didn't want to come.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
Like I, There's nothing I can do about that. And then you expect that I'm not going to go kind of be supportive of the fact that they even came and they came. Yeah. Fuck. At least they fucking gave a fuck to come.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
I think Trump, like what they're doing with Gaza and him coming in and speaking on that is one of the most fucked up things I've ever heard of in my life. Kind of, you know, lost me.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
economy at tiktokeconomicimpact.com. So it's like, yeah, I don't know. That shit was kind of crazy to me. But then you got to realize, like, all you could, like, I just have to just be myself, man. And I don't even know who that is sometimes. And so I'm still learning about who that is, you know?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
Yeah, if you ever think you could... I would never let anybody even put a pin in me that described me as one part of one group anyway. I will never be part of one group. I wouldn't even do that to myself. This is who I am. I'm vegan. They don't even have the fucking group that I am, you know? Hey, buddy, they do not have the group you are.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
And I think they don't have the group that a lot of us are. They don't have my group. We're more complex than just being like, you're this or that, you know? Yeah, if they said we had a fucking... 30K struggling alcoholic guy who's in therapy with his wife. You know what I'm saying? Who loves a fucking good brisket and Johnson brat. You know what I'm saying? And cares about his kids a ton.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
That is a good point, dude. Anybody that says you have a problem, you're doing pretty good.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
Damn, them guys was bad, homie. None of them look like my grandfather. I know, huh? Damn, bro, shit got real. What else do we want to talk about? Okay. Is there anything else? You got your special coming out.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
And a Testaverde jersey. Dude. Back when you were just waiting for the 49ers to come in town and beat your ass.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
That's him. Spreading luck. March 18th on Netflix. The special is dropping. You got the 5K in Tampa. You have your double down show that's in Las Vegas. Yes.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
on a plane she's like dad this fucking he is fucking hysterical i was like dude fuck yeah i remember watching george i watched shane gillis for the first time and was like are we gonna have to laugh at this yeah and i love that i love that i'm the luckiest motherfucker out there well we're lucky to be in your presence man i feel that and uh thanks for always being supportive and thanks for some of the nice things that you said today dude and yeah yeah i feel lucky i was driving over here today i was like man my job today i get to talk to a friend of mine fuck
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
Fuck. That's a blessing. It's a blessing. Burt Kreischer, man. Stay healthy and enjoy your year off of comedy, huh?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
He'll be back on tour in a month probably, but that's okay. He keeps working hard. Love you, bro. Love you, bro.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
I'd be like, oh, damn, we got a mega death rally happening. What is this?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
Yeah, it's always, and it's a little, it was almost a little.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
Hey, somebody come stand like this. And there's a bunch of guys going like this. Dude, one time I was at this party out in Franklin, Tennessee, and they had like a huge bonfire, right? And so they were – and they had one black guy that was at the party, right? And they sent him to pour the gasoline on all this huge – it was a huge pile of sticks. You had to climb up. I mean it was humongous.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
It was probably – A little gas goes a long way. I agree. And it was 40 feet wide and probably 20 feet high, this pile. And I was like, and there was American flags everywhere. I was like, you cannot send the one. I was like, if anything happens right there, this looks absolute.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
They're like, we're not doing that. We're not falling for that again. Oh, fuck. They're going to make us take that out probably.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
Dude, I can't believe you're in therapy, so that's going on. Yeah, I like it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
But you've done so much. Don't you worry that continuing to burn it at that speed would burn you out, or maybe you just don't get burned out?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
Yeah. Yeah, riding a bike, the toughest thing I remember, well, first, some guy who's teaching, you don't know him, usually. In my neighborhood, you didn't know him. It was like some dude's dad would be out there drinking or something. He's like, I'll teach this little ****, whatever, you know? You're like, well, that's not, that's a whore.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E565 Bert Kreischer
Oh, those videos. I would always get envious of those, seeing all the pictures of the gorges and stuff like that, and you guys are just having a blast. I would always feel like such a loser that I wasn't doing it or I wasn't in some of those places. No, it's just I can't afford you. I don't know about that.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
I have some tour dates to tell you about. I'll be in Chicago, Illinois on April 24th, Miami, Florida on May 10th, Cedar Rapids, Iowa on June 19th, St. Paul, Minnesota on June 20th, Fargo, North Dakota on June 21st, Rapid City, South Dakota on June 22nd, Winnipeg and Calgary in the Canada. All tickets at theovan.com slash T-O-U-R.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
But it's crazy to think that when you think about – this is a misconception that I started to realize that I had, that when I travel around the country – because we've probably – and I just said this recently, but we – Touring comedy, we've probably done the top 200 cities size-wise, right? Like some comedians, they go to 50 cities, right? Sure.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
And they go to the – we went as many places as you could go. And we still have more to go. But I mean like anywhere from like –
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
you know lubbock to lacrosse wisconsin yeah i mean just we we to fargo i mean we're going to medium-sized cities and you always think like oh well there's factories everywhere that make things and stuff like that there's not no there's not and you you think oh well i'm sure there's always when you're flying on an airplane you're like oh i'm sure we're passing thousands and hundreds of thousands of factories that are making products and sweatshirts that we're not
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
Okay. So let's talk about a couple of these things, Mike. So first let's talk about, I'm going to take this off because it is pretty warm in here, but I will say this, this feels great.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
They made a t-shirt. Oh dude, you will never, this thing will keep your coffee warm for seven eons.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
Oh God, it's going to turn into a wife. You're going to, Spit my lip again. Hey. But no, this is really awesome, Mike. And I know you have a new show that's coming out on your YouTube on May 2nd where you went and met with a lot of just workers on the ground, right?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
The tariff stuff? Yeah. Okay, so let's start there. So Trump has put in a lot of – he started this kind of tariff war, right?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
And you hear people say it's good. You hear people say that it's bad. From my perspective, after traveling around the country, I don't know how else you're going to get jobs back here because it just – there's a lot of towns that are boarded up. There's a lot of small cities that are boarded up. I mean a whole city. You walk through the city of Jackson, Mississippi during the day –
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
It looks like a movie set. It's very clean. It's beautiful. But there's nothing. And that's one of 40 probably cities that we've seen that are like that. So I'm just thinking what's going to come and save these cities if something needs to. And so then you start to see Trump with these tariffs on and then you start to get the idea. Well, it's to bring jobs back. So we have jobs here.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
You know what I'm saying? You put a couple, you know? I think I know what you're saying. I'm just saying you mix a few items and you got some – that's the best rum they got.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
That's just pain. Well, thanks for doing that, man. Oh, that's the worst, bro. When you drink something so hot, but you want to be a man. That's what I think. Our grandfathers, no wonder they couldn't express their feelings. They couldn't talk. They couldn't talk, man. You know how hot the coffee was then? It was magma.
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#577 - Mike Rowe
Right. But do you feel like, do you think Trump, his intentions are good?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
Because your foundation gives out – Work ethic scholarships. Work ethic scholarships. And people can apply on the website. Right.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
No, you're just saying this is – so this is a way that you're trying to be a part of the things that you've gone through and seen. You want to put guys back in the workforce and make them be prepared. Is that right?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
All the time. Yeah. We lost at least a grandfather to teeth infection or to gum infection. At least. But yeah, people died. It was crazy. It's bananas.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
That's an open letter to the president. March 11, 2009. I am awed by the task at hand and compelled to tell you about MicroWorks, a public awareness campaign designed to reinvigorate the trades. Yeah, we need – there needs to be – you're saying – look.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
Packed with over 400 bioactive ingredients that fortify gut integrity, strengthen immunity, revitalize hair growth, fuel stamina, elevate focus, and help you function like a human again. Armra Colostrum. We've worked out a special offer for our audience. Receive 15% off your first order. Go to tryarmra, T-R-Y-A-R-M-R-A.com slash Theo or enter Theo to get 15% off your first order.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
That's T-R-Y-A-R-M-R-A.com slash T-H-E-O. I like Armra Colostrum. I put it in my smoothies. I enjoy it and I'm happy that I take it. Armra Colostrum. Well, I've got some thoughts on that. So one is, do you think that the college, one of the reasons it went up was because most of that money was loans, and then that was almost a – not a scam, but a scheme to – Scam's good. Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
What you're selling – Right, but how does that money – just so I know, so I'm clear. So that money works because then – The college loans it to you, they put interest on it, and then you have to pay it back.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
Yeah, it also sounds like you borrowed some money from a guy in Memphis.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
So the more people that they can get to go to college, the more interest that they can get off of these big loans, right?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
How you process it and how you utilize it, that's up to you.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
Oh, yeah, that's right. I forgot you were an opera guy.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
Cat calling. Dude, if you hear that cat call, you stop. If it's just some fucking Chicano whistling at you, dude, I'm keeping walking. But you hit a guy, fucking hit half of an Ave Maria on his lunch break near an open manhole, dude. You got to stop.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
So I sang – Okay. I'll have the antipasta. Okay. But it was like the image –
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
It's an oral Vietnam, man. There's nothing like that, going down that journey, the D-Day of every bite you take and one of them is going to step on that hidden – IED of a previously bitten inner lip. An oral Vietnam. Can we get him some coffee? It's going to happen again. Some cream. They just bring you more coffee?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
So you're saying that if the tariffs work right, part of that is going to have to be that we're going to need people who can do the jobs, do the manufacturing jobs here. We're going to need those skilled labor workers. Right. Yes. Okay. So, and we don't have all those right now. We need them. We don't have them. How do you, so we almost need like a, like a, remember that uncle Sam poster?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
Like I want you, like we need that PR campaign to get people hype because, because yeah, you just need that thing. That's going to get people hype a little bit.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
Well, AA has a – they have a pledge in the beginning that you do as a group. There's something about doing something as a group that makes you feel a part of a group. That's how a group works. That's how tradition happens, right? You can't just have it without actually participating in it and vowing to it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
Yeah, probably not in California you can't. But I think just – you got to keep it off the documents but secretly in your head you can – Low-key have some ideas.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
Wink, wink. Do you think there's something different about the Gen Z workforce or do you think there's just – they haven't had the same examples that previous generations had?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
We're not pointing at the Gen Z workforce like you're bad or anything like that because it's so funny. It's like we had a guy on recently, this guy Alexander Wang, and he's not the fashion guy that got murdered. He's a – He's kind of a semi-Chinese guy, but he founded Scale AI. It's an AI company. And he was saying that one way to look at AI is that everyone will kind of level up, right?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
It's like suddenly kind of robots or computers will do a lot of the more menial tasks. And you'll – everyone will kind of be a manager. And it's interesting because if you say that to me or your generation, our generation kind of, that people would be like –
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
well, I don't want to just be, I don't want to be the manager of five robots and I sit in a small dark room all the time and that's my life and maybe I get four day work week instead of five. But if you told my nephews, That, hey, you get to be the manager of five robots and you just sit in this room and control them all day. They would think that's awesome just because of how they've grown up.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
You know, like everything is so gamified. So it's kind of interesting because you start to get into what the whole like – perception of work, of being alive even is to people. Does that make any sense to you? It makes, look, it starts. I mean, there's a lot in there.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
Yeah, definitely. In some communities, that is not good. Well, there's no— It's not good. There's no nipples on the almond. Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
In a manner of speaking. We went through a siding phase. We'll come right back to this idea. I remember we went through a siding phase in our town once. Somebody came through with a – like a semi truck full of siding, it over, it fell over. And they said people had a bunch of people stealing siding, you know? And so.
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#577 - Mike Rowe
Please go through those links so you get accurate pricing, and I appreciate your support for the return of the Rat Tour. Today's guest is a host. You know him from Dirty Jobs. He's also an author and a podcaster. He has a new show coming out in May called People You Should Know, where he travels the country interviewing regular people who are making a difference in the world around them.
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#577 - Mike Rowe
Well, people in our area hadn't seen siding before, so they were putting it on the sides of everything, dude. You put siding on a house, siding on a floor. Sure. Yeah, you'd have siding on the ceilings. Like, it is not supposed to go up there. People had siding. Bro, they put siding on a damn baby while it was resting, dude.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
Where did you get those out of? Did you go into the cow?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
They would kill. This is the smallest work. This is the fire ant of the work community.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
In 30 seconds, you're going to start telling us all your secrets.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
Oh, that's very fair. I'm going to say this. You know what? You're right. And I think that that used to be a part of kind of what you were saying even in school. It's like I pledge allegiance to my country. This country means something to me. Like my grandfather worked at this factory where they made parts – it was for FMC, right?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
And they made like elevator – parts for elevator shafts and stuff like that. But he would go to the factory and it was like this thing. And then when we were in elevators, we would see his little emblem on the thing. He was like, oh, grandpa made this, you know? Dude, that – And that kind of stuff was huge.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
It was, it was like, even like native, like in cultures, there are stories that you tell your grandkids. It's like, like the meaning of being human. We passed from each other. We pass it in like relics and in, um,
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
artifacts and you know you keep things from people that meant meant something to you so i think to think that that just because that only happens it doesn't only happen like in your family if your grandfather passes away and you keep something that meant something to him but it happens as a community too it's like you have things that mean something to you and that carry on what am i uh does that make any sense am i rambling i'm okay no dude i'm telling you yeah what the fuck are you talking about of course it makes sense dude yeah it makes you feel alive dude
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#577 - Mike Rowe
You know, it makes you feel alive. And then like you see something across town, you're like, man, I was a part of that. And you get to drive by and tell your son, I built that house. And your son's like, no way. I want to learn how to build something.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
Some hotties in the back. Well, you know. Going the extra mile right there. American Pride with Mike Rowe. This show is sponsored by BetterHelp. You know, some people think that mental therapy and mental health and getting mentally regular are luxuries. That only fancy people can do it. Oh, I can't be mentally well. That's for them, you know. That's for them fancy folks. But that's not true.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
Everybody deserves to feel comfortable in their own skin and in their own skull. And sometimes if you're troubled, you can't, you know, you can't figure something out. It's better to share it with someone. Talk to a therapist. Therapy should feel accessible. Better help. That's who I'm talking about.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
With online therapy, you get quality care at a price that makes sense and can help you with anything from anxiety to everyday stress. It's convenient too. You can join a session with the click of a button. helping you to fit therapy into your busy life, plus switch therapists at any time. Your well-being is worth it. Visit betterhelp.com slash theo to get 10% off your first month.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
That's betterhelp, H-E-L-P dot com slash T-H-E-O. Is pornography causing a problem in your life? Do you find yourself watching porno for longer periods of time and having trouble stopping? Is porn affecting your relationship or dating life? Well, you're certainly not alone.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
Watching pornography has become so commonplace today and oftentimes men use porn to numb the pain of loneliness, boredom, anxiety, and depression. Shame and stigma prevent men from talking about these issues and getting help for them. I want to introduce you to my friend Steve. Steve is the founder of Valor Recovery, a program to help men overcome porn abuse and sexual compulsivity.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
Steve is a long-term sexual recovery member and has personally overcame the emotional and spiritual despair of abusing pornography and has dedicated his life to empowering men to do the same. Steve is an amazing person and he is a close friend of mine. I mean that. Valor Recovery helps men to develop the tools necessary to have a healthier sex life.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
Their coaches are in long-term recovery and will be your partner, mentor, and spiritual guide to transcend these problematic behaviors. To learn more about Valor Recovery, please visit them at www.valorrecoverycoaching.com or email them at admin at valorrecovery.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
recoverycoaching.com thank you let's talk about like the workforce a little bit then let's talk about some issues that they face for a few minutes and i want to talk about your new show um last time we spoke we talked about minimum wage right
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
Well, I do believe that one thing I think I have in common with a lot of my audience is that the way that we feel about stuff, right? We might have different views on things, but I think our feelings are a lot the same. And we talk a lot about like purpose on here. Like we had a guy named John Verveke come on and talk about purpose. We had Richard Reeves, this really great
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
he talks about how men aren't leaders in their communities anymore. You know, they're not doing boy scout troops. They're not teaching in classes anymore. So we're losing this male to male connection piece that is part of what keeps our desire to be like, um, performing humans, human males, you know, like, um, so we talk about this kind of stuff a lot.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
Uh, and maybe there's a way we can figure out something to do where we could, you know, where I can, uh, we would love to donate and then just continue to help send people your direction.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
Return of the rat, man. That's the thing. You can't keep a rat down. You could kill a rat. Bam, another rat, boy. They pop up, dude. They keep popping up. But that's who we are.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
dirty jobs louisiana was very good to dirty jobs i mean from baton rouge to lafayette to cut off i did my time there we should have been cut off and we stayed on dude that's louisiana louisiana purchased first of all thank you very fucking much you wouldn't even have a third of this country for us and for louisiana thomas jefferson 1803 making that deal and we kept the receipt i'll say that it's a good one and also we have nutria rats rats that live underwater bro i
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
I'm seriously involved. This is the dark arts. Selling jewelry to people that are high on sleeping pills.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
I know. I know. That is something else. But thank you, bro. That's very nice of you, dude. Yeah. I think that's the one thing that connects our audience is just there's this way that we feel. And a lot of it is hopeful, right? And so that's the side that I choose to err on when it comes to the tariff stuff. It's like I have no clue. Like if it doesn't work, what the fuck? What do we lose?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
I believe that we are at a severe crossing point right now. Where if it gets an, if another generation without like a sense of purpose, it's, it's not going to matter. Nothing, nothing's going to matter anymore.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
There won't even be enough of a person inside of our grandchildren for it to matter to like, even if you bring the gasoline, there's not gonna be enough of a, of a amp inside of them to even spark it up. It's like, even I think the human spirit is a muscle, right? But that's how I feel about it. And I feel like it's always there, but it's like the stronger that we work it and the more that we,
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#577 - Mike Rowe
encourage others to work it, you know? And it's scary, man. I think people don't realize it's scary, but then I think part of all of us realize that something scary is going on.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
But what's going to be way more uncomfortable is whatever's after that. It doesn't even sound human to me after that.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
My sister got a liver transplant and we had to wait and they called us over and we get over there and be like, no, the guy's going to stay alive. And we're like, well, don't call us then.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
They're making appointments for a heart based on knowing when the guy's going to die or they're killing them. They're killing them, dude.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
Oh my gosh. Look at you. Right. Where were you from? Transylvania.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
And a baby won't eat it, too. You see that one where they try to give that to a baby and they won't eat it. Yeah. Because they know.
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#577 - Mike Rowe
Well, and also I think our media is probably a lot of it has been under control of people who don't want to –
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
champion america maybe you know i don't know if that's true or if it's just the fads and the way that things have gone but are it's just it's always it seemed like things have gotten like anti-american somehow in the past even 10 years like the american flag even became like kind of a right-wing symbol as opposed to the symbol of our country and whoever's straight people think that things just happen i believe that there's strategy behind a lot of stuff that's out there um
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
I want to switch to a topic of – but we talked before about minimum wage. I don't think people can survive on minimum wages these days. I just don't think that they can do it. And Bernie Sanders talked about how, well, if a company makes more money because they start using AI or for whatever reason, that shouldn't that minimum wage go up within that company for the workers, you know?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
I think we have to do something. If somebody makes $8 an hour and they work for eight hours, that's $64. You can buy food for your family for that day these days with that.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
I know what it is, I bet. Say it. They offer you the time to think and plan and strategize and get excited for something that you want to do. It's almost like a soil that you get to be in for a little bit.
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#577 - Mike Rowe
Because we get stuck in the doldrums sometimes. We get stuck in the ditch and we don't look for the light. I'm going to give you the light.
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#577 - Mike Rowe
And I think we have to, you have to realize, like, I start thinking like the only way to compete with big business is you have to start a new way to do big business that, like, I wanted to sell like a water, right? I thought like so many people are in recovery and so many more people are headed into recovery for drug addiction, sex and pornography addiction.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
It's coming soon. I don't know. Hopefully not super soon.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
That said, OK, I could keep going on that. But but yeah, it's like you have to fight fire with fire and you have to fight it with more compassionate and empathetic files. Like what if we sold a water where the proceeds of it went to put people in rehab? Right. So then it would be really hard, especially these days where so many people.
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#577 - Mike Rowe
All they have left is how they feel kind of because a lot of other things have been taken away from them. It would be hard to say, okay, I'm not going to buy this. I know this is going to help somebody get better, right? It's like I think you have to start thinking beyond like this circle that we've been in of just like profiteering and of like combining everything.
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#577 - Mike Rowe
Everything is just like these – what do they call it when they all get together but it's one owner or whatever? Yeah. um co-op co-op or like um because a lot of the stories that i heard this is i just thought about this um a lot of my friends stories were that their dads got laid off after working at a place for 20 years and 25 years Or their grandfather.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
That was the story that I heard where I bet a generation earlier was my grandfather got a big severance thing and he got this and that and he was like the pride of the company. A lot of the other stories became my dad got laid off after 22 years. They didn't get – And I think a lot of that happened because, like you're saying, umbrella companies came in. Things got consolidated.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
I mean we're meeting with Mark Zuckerberg, and they're like up against antitrust stuff right now.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
We're going to see him in Los Alamos or whatever they live at, Facebook.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
I love that. We should bring that back. What if we brought something like that back?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
Well, your show's on there too. It comes out May 2nd.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
No, no, she's something. She is? I don't even know who she is. I was just thinking of the only Emmy I know.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
I wonder if we should – what if we did a fun one on like YouTube and we sold American – products that were American-made, Mike?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
It's always a good time chatting with the one and only Mr. Mike Rose.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
I mean, I know that it's a, you hear about it so much and it's used so much. I think it's hard to know what's really going on with it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
That could have gone either way. You see a depressed dude making a knife. You're like, how's this going?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
One-eyed Steve. Yeah, he threw me out the door. You ever listen to Widespread Panic? Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
I like that. Or Def Leppard and Glorilla, maybe like Def Glorilla. Def Glorilla, yeah. Dude, they should have cool bands that merge. Taco Bell and Pizza Hut did it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
Dude, didn't we see each other at Dave Ramsey's thing? Were you there? No. I've done Dave Ramsey's thing. Were you there? I think – I don't know if we might have been there at the same time. Or Tucker Carlson. Were you at that Zen thing he had?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
Telethons were great, though. You'd call up and you'd be like, who's crippled? Sometimes my stepdad would get drunk or whatever. Right. And he'd like want to impress my mom. So we'd ring up one of those telethons that were on just to – he'd be like, hey, it's Randy. Who's crippled over there? And they'd like tell you who's crippled or whatever. He'd be like, put $30 on that one.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
Right. That's the thing. You can't just keep yelling at it. You can't just be like, this is what they're doing. This is what – you have to start to be like, well, how do we – be engine. How do you ingenuity it or whatever it's called? Engine, no engine eyes, engineer, engineer. Well, yeah. How do you, but that's how you win.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
It's like, but just pointing the finger at a time that you're not doing anything.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
They made a deal with American giant too, didn't they?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
Anything. Imagine like a QVC type of thing, right, where it's like this is American-made and it's awesome, right? You would like make sure that the products were good and that they had enough of a supply chain where they could sell. Or maybe they can only make 50 this month. But that's what they are. And then they're limited. And then you have like something that's a real person made it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
And then when you're walking around with something on your back, this is like you're not just carrying – you don't just have a shirt on your back that makes you look cool. You have somebody's well-being and their purpose on your back. And so now you're carrying something together. Once you're both carrying purpose, it takes a lot of – it's pressure if it's just you.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
But if you put the same weight on two people, that's purpose, man.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
And we have to do it. The toughest part then is I've found in my own life when it is if I – And it's not like you're playing the victim, but sometimes you're the person that gets affected by something, but you also have to be the person to be a part of fixing it. And that's the toughest thing because there's a part of me that always wants to be like, this isn't fair. And I'm not saying for me.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
I've been fortunate in my life. I can afford to pay my rent and I can afford to buy my groceries. But there's certainly been times where I've – in the past where I've been like – This is unfortunate. It's their fault. It's society's fault. But still, it put me in a certain position. I still have to be the one to correct my position.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
Yeah. Oh, that's the truth, man. And self-pity can be a drug. I was addicted to self-pity for a long time. I didn't even realize it. Yeah, man. I was addicted to self-pity. I was like, oh, that's a – and I would get addicted to it. It feels good to feel bad. It does, especially when that's the thing you're most used to feeling. It feels impossible to even attempt to feel good.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
I was afraid to feel good because I would be – I was afraid I would leave my bad feelings behind, and they were the only feelings I'd ever even known. No.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
That's a, that's crazy. And I never even knew that could happen, man. That took a ton of work to get to do that. Uh, Yeah, I would love to think of something. It's so funny because I've been trying to think of that. How do we fight fire with like a fire that has a feeling in it, right? And then, yeah, what about unions? We had Sean O'Brien come in about unions. Unions helps a lot of people.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
Do you feel like unions are bad or do you feel like unions are good or it's just – Too broad. Too broad. Never mind.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
If businesses start to become more like groundworks, you wouldn't even need a union. Thank you. That's the future. Fire with fire. It's reconceptualizing things.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
It's all a shell game. You have to realize this whole thing has been a shell game.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
Surgeon at that moment. That's right. For your family to sleep safe at night, that guy is your surgeon.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
I'm not sure. I think they've dated for a while. I'm not sure who it was. They may have. One of them took the other one's name.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
If at a certain point – at a certain point, you have to invest in your own country and your own people, the spirit of your own people. And I can't understand – how that's not extremely evident right now.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
And if UBI, if universal basic income helps people to get by for a couple of years or five years, while these, while like things adjust from going from, let's try to build stuff here in our own country and make people feel empowered.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
And if they're, as if they're part of the, an assembly line of humanity and of purpose in, of a nation and of a, a group think of, of a moral code, then I don't, I don't, I think that that's totally fine. Let's stop giving money to other places who have enough money right now and help our own people out for a little while.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
I know I'm opening up bigger cans of worms, but it's just – I am all in because if you don't do it now, to me it appears like it's kind of going to be a wrap. But I still believe that there's that human spirit, that there's that – There's that team spirit. There's that whatever made those people – whatever that thing is to be an American, even if it's not even real, but we believe in it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
There's still that inside of us that makes me believe that we could turn it around.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
We'll talk about it another time. We can. But yeah, can you do it to scale? What pieces have to start? But you have to start somewhere. It's like the crazy person – The leader was at first the crazy person. The revolutionaries were first viewed as insane always.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
I mean, I feel inspired. I feel like we can do things. I just, I feel like things are so possible, right? And, yeah, I just appreciate that there's an audience that tunes in, and I hope they just stay patient, you know, and we'll keep thinking together, and we'll find ways to do things new. I just – I don't think it's that far off to change things, you know?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
It just says be good to yourself on the back. Well, here you go. Cause yeah, we're a lot of late bloomers here, but we're fucking hopeful. And yeah, I think, I think we can do something cool. Like we just have to make sure we get it right. You know, you got to try, man. Right. You have to try. That's the thing about terrorists. Like fucking try. I don't give a shit. There's nothing to lose.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
I've been to every place. Everybody I know is in addiction. What are we, what are we waiting for to happen?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
Kleenex and spit. I agree, man. It's time to clear our own throat and make our own fucking glue, too, I think. I thought you were going to go with phlegm.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
Micro, your new show is out May 2nd. We'll make sure to share some clips of it on our Instagram page as well and on our Facebook. Thanks, pal. Yeah, and it's a rehash of – it's not a rehash.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
Next up, Mike, we actually have the Princess Diana Beanie Babies that are in town. Hey, that's fantastic, Theo. They're just passing through, actually. Mike, there's not many of them.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
Oh, I believe that. And I'll tell you this, that these Beanie Babies are stuffed with – What's the – it's not cotton. What is it? It's styrofoam, Theo. Oh, yeah, styrofoam.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
Yep, and we also – she comes – if you buy her now, she comes with these two CIA dolls. We're not saying anything. You say potato.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
Oh, say it, Mike. And if you order right now within the next 44 seconds, both of these CIA Beanie Babies will be stuffed with pure polyester or gay cotton, as they call it in some circles.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
Oh, I wouldn't put it in a baby's crib unless you want him to walk this week. That's what I'd say. I just bit my lip. I'm going to put two creamers inside of myself. Mike, we have you here. Thank you, dude. I didn't know you were in those trenches. Because you know what I've thought about? It would be neat to do something if we did it with products, only products that are American made, right?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
I just got this shirt and a jacket from this company, American Giant, right? Seriously? Yeah. Bring in that jacket if you can. I know those guys. Bathrop or what's a Winthrop?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
See, this is the difference between today. Look, this is the difference between my parents and us today. This is how you got a cup of coffee like my grandparents. They would serve it like this. Yep. And you figure it out.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#577 - Mike Rowe
Because this is – yeah, how did I come across this? Oh, a friend of mine showed this to me. They sent me a clip about a guy was trying to make a product in America. Yeah. And he couldn't do it. I'll put it on for a few minutes. This is my AG right here, daddy.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#583 - Chad "Ochocinco" Johnson
He got his kids and baby mamas. Line them up. Let him roll his ass out of here.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#583 - Chad "Ochocinco" Johnson
Now I'm just floating on the breeze And I feel I'm falling like these leaves I must be But when I reach that ground, I'll share this peace of mind I found. I can feel it in my bones. But it's gonna take...
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
I want to let you know we've restocked all your favorites on the merch site. Everything is in stock. You can show up theovonstore.com and thank you so much for the support. I have some new tour dates to tell you about. I'll be in Chicago, Illinois on April 24th at the Wintrust Arena. Fort Wayne, Indiana on April 26th at the Allen County War Memorial Coliseum.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
What's the difference? I don't know the difference. Yeah, let's get the difference there because people need to know this anyway.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
And what are they just flinging Adderall into the rest of the campus?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
Yeah. And so this was like a event that would go on and people would kind of rave there. What are you saying?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
Right. And you dropped out. Is that safe to say? Yeah. Okay. You dropped out. And then you – So you got into AI, into the AI world. Is that kind of a safe bridge to say? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay. Is there – and I want to ask this because I know Mark Zuckerberg dropped out of college. You dropped out of college. Both you guys have had success in tech and kind of forward-thinking that sort of world.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
Is there something in college that you felt like didn't nurture you or did you just feel like – this isn't the place for me. Do you feel like college doesn't nurture a certain type of thinker or was it just a personal choice?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
So AlphaGo versus Lee Sedol, also known as the DeepMind Challenge match, was a five-game Go match between top Go player Lee Sedol and AlphaGo, a computer Go program developed by DeepMind, played in Seoul, South Korea, between 9th and 15th of March 2016. That's confusing how that's written. It is very confusing. You'd think that we got to... AlphaGo won all but the fourth game.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
All games were won by resignation. The match has been compared with the historic chess match between Deep Blue and Garry Kasparov. Huh. The winner of the match was slated to win $1 million since AlphaGo won. Google DeepMind stated that the prize would be donated to charities, including UNICEF and USAID. That's just a joke. That's just... But Lee received $150,000 for playing.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
So this was a big moment because this had never kind of happened before?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
Like, what were your thoughts after you left? Because you and I ended up, we like left out of there and then went and got lunch together, which was kind of crazy.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
It's a little more fun than playing chess, unless you're like, you know, in a like Renaissance Fair board games or whatever. Yeah, yeah. Okay, so now we got you. You're loose, dude. You're out of the school and you're in the world. You see, did that match, did realizing that kind of like spurn you to want to leave school or was that just something that happened around the same time?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
Scale AI. Okay. And so did you – had you been following AI? Like what are your kind of – or you just like knew like this is where it's going? Like you just felt there was something – an instinct that you trusted or like – because that's a big thing to do.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
Okay. So you were already learning a lot about it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
No, I just got there the day, the morning of the inauguration. Were you there the whole weekend?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
And so I- Did you ever market those refrigerators? Did you ever actually create that? I didn't market them. No. Dude, I could totally see that, bro. There's a refrigerator. Every dorm has it where there's a camera built in and you just get, you get a notification on your phone, you know? You're like, damn, Adnan's got my hummus, you know? But you got video of him right there, dude.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
Okay, so Alexander Wang, he's free in the world now. He's headed to San Francisco. He's AI'd up. He feels the energy. He's motivated by some of the classes he took. He's motivated by seeing that AI is starting to actually overtake humans, right? Or be able to compete with actual human thinking with the chess match.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
About artificial intelligence. Yeah. Yeah, because I've always heard about artificial intelligence. That's what I have. So I've always been like, no, you're you are you have real intelligence, not artificial, real intelligence. I don't I mean, I think it's it's probably a mix, but I see what you're saying. You know, I do. Do you know what I thought of the other day?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
It was like, what if they had like a Mexican version? It was like, hey, I don't know. That's a good that's a good joke. But thank you. It's a nice laugh. This show is sponsored by better help. What are some of your relationship green flags? That's a good question. What are things you notice in your relationship that are like, yes, this is positive, this is good.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
I mean when I saw Conor McGregor show up, that's when I was like shit is – where are we? That's what like the most bizarre – I mean you were there. Sam Altman was there. I was just like – it was like what happened here? And part of that is because Alex Brusiewicz, you know. Totally, yeah. I mean it's all because of him that we all went.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
I see. So just like a human would, like if you showed them this, then you're starting to train them to have a perspective.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
When you started Scale AI, you mean? Yeah, when I started Scale AI. So when you kind of got into AI at that time, self-driving cars are the most popular thing.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
But just the fact that he would bring these people together, it kind of makes you question.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
Okay. And is it a pro? It's like, say if I opened a door, like, like, oh, we keep the AI in there. Is it a computer? Is it a program? Is it a hard drive? Like what? Okay. What is that?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
There's really big ones. OK. But these are the – so this is the – these are the brain cells of it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
Oh, yeah. When like the Harlem Globetrotters and it would be like them versus like the Care Bears or whatever would show up.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
Yeah. Yeah. This seems, yeah, some cross pollination. Yeah. What do you think when Connor showed up? Was that strange to see him? Like, was there somebody you thought that was like unique to see there for you?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
Um, so when someone goes to like scale AI or chat GPT, these are all AI interfaces or what are they there?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
Um, so you could say to this, um, can you describe the weather today? Exactly. Yeah. And if you said that to. Five different AI companies, basically? Yeah, or AI algorithms, different AI systems, yeah. So if you said that's five different AI systems, you might get a little bit of a varied answer.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
Okay, you're losing me there a little. Yeah, yeah. It's okay. But if I slow down, if you're losing me, but so explain that to me a little bit clearer for me.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
Okay. So you have the chips and everything that are storing all the information. Yep. They're storing the data. Yep. And then you have the algorithms that are helping mediate between the user and the data.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
And so this is – Like how are you going to get data for your system? Like how do you farm the best data?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
Okay, so if I ask an AI system a question or ask it to help me with something, help me to design something or to curate an idea, it's going to use the data that it has within it to respond to me and help give me an answer that I can use. And the data it has in it is only based upon the data that is put into it. Exactly.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
So they're almost data farming, like creating good data?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
A lot of jobs. Okay. And so what would, okay, so Scale was your company. Scale AI. It's an AI system.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
And then Outlier- Yep. Is a separate company that works with it. Yep. And that is where you are hiring people-
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
So how and how does a user do that? Like what is an example of somebody who's helping build data for an AI database?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
Yeah, I didn't even think about that. There was a couple hundred thousand people probably that just got kind of displaced in a way. And suddenly they're just in bars or whatever, just buying. There was people I saw walking, just adult onesies and shit that said Trump on the back. That's crazy shit. Yeah. Yeah, thanks for coming in, man. I'm excited to learn about AI.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
And so people get paid for that? Yeah, yeah. They get paid. And how do you know if their information is valuable or not? Right.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
Everything. Shellfish, train tracks, whatever. Yeah, exactly. Gelatin. Everything. Childhood, death, or whatever. Yeah, totally. Stars, galaxies, whatever. Yeah, yeah. Animals. Big animals. Yeah. Yeah. Damn. So, wow. Wow.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
So it's kind of like your data is almost like an ocean or a body of water and you different places are going to be able to keep their body of water cleaner or dirtier and different infections could get in different spyware, all types of stuff.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
So and if you have really a clean body of water, then you're going to be able to offer a clean data or a certain type of data to people who are using your AI platform. Does that make sense or not?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
Wow. So is there almost a race for information right now in a weird way or no? Is that not it? A little bit, yeah. I think that there's a – well, there's a race for – How are different AI systems competing against each other? And sorry to interrupt you.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
Oh, God, I'm in the future right now. That's so why, man, it's just it's so crazy. And I think AI scares people because the future scares people, right? It's like, that's one of the scariest things sometimes is the future. So I think a lot of times people you associate, because a lot of times people mention AI, there's a little bit of fear, it seems like from people.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
I know that that's a world that you're in. You're in the tech universe. And you're from New Mexico, right? Yeah. Yeah. And so when you grew up there, did you have like a strong sense of like science and technology? Was that like part of your world? Like did your parents like lead you into that? Like what was just some of your youth like there?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
There's fear that it's going to take jobs. There's fear that it's going to take over our ability to think for ourselves. Yeah, there's just kind of some general uncertainty there. And it kind of feels like fear a lot of times, but a lot of times fear is just a lack of knowledge, right? And not a lack of knowledge because you didn't want to know just because you don't know.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
Or that you're dumb, but just because you don't know. What are positive things that we're going to see with AI, right? I want to start there.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
And the only place you can get new data is from people. At a certain point, would the system be able to create – It can probably matriculate data or matriculate – is that with birthing or what is that? Yeah, it just moves through like – Okay. It can probably like quantify and give you answers, but can AI create new data?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
Yeah, I didn't see that part of it. I didn't understand that we are the ones who are giving it information. And since we're going to continue to learn, I would assume that we would be able to help continue to help it learn.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
Okay. So what do you feel like are other ways, like if you had to look into the future a little bit, right? So you have the fact that people are going to be able to add more data, right? And add nuances to data, right? And probably humanize data a little bit. Yeah, totally. And then you're also going to have what?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
And then it's- So somebody to kind of guide the river a little bit. Yeah. At a certain point, guide the stream, stay in there, watch, make sure that answers are correct, make sure the information is honest. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
Right, so you're going to need managers. You're going to need facilitators.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
What are things that AI will alleviate? Like, what are things that, like, will it eventually be able to have enough information, like, or data where it can, like, cure diseases and stuff like that? Like, is that a realistic thing?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
And Miami, Florida on May 10th at the Kaseya Center. Get your tickets early starting Wednesday, February 19th at 10 a.m. with pre-sale code RATKING. We also have tickets remaining in East Lansing, Victoria, B.C. and the Canada College Station. Belton, Texas, Oxford, Mississippi, Tuscaloosa, Alabama, Nashville, Tennessee, Winnipeg in the Canada and Calgary in the Canada.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
Yeah. Cancer on its heels. Yeah. Sorry, Antonio Brown was just here. I think there's still some smoke in the air.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
Because that's very data-driven, right? Like it's very specific. It's very mathematic. Exactly.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
So I could say, for example, like AI, I would like to shoot maybe – I'm thinking about creating an idea or shooting a film in this area or it's like this. It's going to take place in this type of place. I can give it the setting. I can give it like an outline of the characters, like what they look like. their ages and some description.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
Could you help give me possible potential actors or something within a certain price range that I can maybe cast for that? Yeah. Could you help give me like locations around the country that would fit that backdrop? Yep. Could you list me all the talent agencies that I could reach out to? And you can kind of just put those things in and then you would have like,
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
Is it scary like that? It was, you know... Is it at a level of mystery? Like, is your prom, like, last night under the stars or something?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
sort of a, a bit of a guidebook at that point that would make your, what before was something that felt extremely daunting.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
Shit in two minutes, you know, and then you put it into AI, it gives you the information back in a few minutes and maybe you're.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
So a genius could be three or four X. If somebody is like a genius in something, in some realm or space of thought, you could three or four X them. Yeah, totally. Like multiply their output from their own brain because they could have something really helping them get done a lot of the like – the early work on things and maybe some of the most severe work.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
Yeah, that's a great way – I like some of this thought because, yeah, I could be like – like my fantasy football group and I, we do a draft every year in a different location. And shout out PAE. That's our fantasy league. J-Rod, everybody that's in it. For the past 17 years, we've flown to a city each year and done a draft in person, right? Yeah. But I could say, hey, we have 10 guys.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
We want to go to a nice place. We want there to be a beach. This is the age group of our group. These would kind of be the nights. And just to really give me like a – just a nice plan of, hey, here's 10 possibilities, right? Something like that. And then even more like with a movie, this is what I worry you'd run into.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
Say if I'd be like, okay, I have two main characters and this is kind of what I would like to happen. Could you help me with a first act of a three-act movie? How do you know everybody just doesn't get the same movie then? That's what I would start to worry, that everything that you have to create is all going to be very similar.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
Right. And, and some of the, like a lot of films and books, a lot of it is, there's just like a problem. There's, there's maybe a information you learn, there's a red herring, and then there's a solution. Like that's a lot of stories, right? So If something just gave you the basis and then you go through and make everything your own.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
Because a lot of things, there's only so many templates for things. Huh. Yeah. So say, for example, say you might need to hire people at a company then that would help direct your AI, like somebody who's good at marketing. managing AI and giving it the best prompts or the best way to ask it questions to get the perfect feedback for your company. So those would be new jobs.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
A recreational user would use that term. That's crazy that that just like every year you guys have like, just like blasted Thursdays or whatever.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
Those would be actual new people you would need.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
Fahim Anwar, I was watching him. Bring up a picture of Fahim. This is one of the funny – this guy – this is the most creative comedian in America, undeniable. He is so funny. He had – and everybody would say he's one of the few comedians that everybody goes in there to watch him perform. He had a bit the other night, he talks about he got into a Waymo, right?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
A car, and I see so many Waymos now, which are cars that are just, nobody's in them, you know, but they're going, right? So he had this bit, he's like, he got into a Waymo and it started complaining about its life to him. He's like, I've had a shitty week. Like the car's just talking to him. And he's like, what the, and he's like, now I, no matter what, I still have to talk to my shitty driver.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
um if you get a chance to see him though that guy is he's fascinating yeah um but like so what what companies right now should kind of look to hire an ai guy because we've been thinking about it like we had some uh we had kat williams on a last week and we're like hey can you create visuals of suge knight and kat williams riding bicycles down sunset boulevard right and this is the one they sent back a little while later christopher folino is the guy's name fyi
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
And this is just, this is right where I say it was like by the comedy store on Sunset Boulevard. There you go. I mean, this looks like it's out of a movie kind of. Yeah, totally. I mean, and the guy did that in just a little bit of time. What types of people would you get to? I mean, this is. That's you. Yeah. If I was healthier, if I had healthier gums too. But what about this?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
What kind of, like what companies right now, what job spaces? Cause we want to get an AI guy, right? But I don't really, my brain is like, well, what do they do? How do I, how would I keep them busy? You know, I could get them to make some animations and ideas, but what type of people need an AI person right now? Do you feel like?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
And where did they drop the atomic bombs on? They dropped them on Asia, right? Hiroshima?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
to provide a better product or a better experience or better content for you know whoever you need to do that for yeah because i guess right now we're like there's certain moments like hey let's animate this moment or see what ai would look like it adds some visual effects to some of our episodes so that's something we like to do to just be fun and creative i would like to maybe create like some sort of an animated character we already have a great animator and we want to keep that but to have an ai space where it's like you know because they have something they had a little cat the other day or something and he was going to war
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
And I was like, damn, dude, this is, and it was AI, you know? Yeah, totally. And they had a baby who was getting in a taxi. And I was like, this shit is illegal. You know, I don't know if it's illegal or not, but it seems, you know, it doesn't seem, you know.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
damn brother if they show up dude wow this honestly it looks it looks badass and it looks like cats have been waiting to do this a long time yeah that's the crazy shit about cats you look in their eyes now their outfits finally match the look in their eyes that's what it feels like dude wow that's dude that's uh that's fremen fremen cats
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
oh my gosh yeah yeah so that's gonna get alarming dude that's gonna get hella alarming that's a movie right there it is but it's almost like you could make like that's what i want to get i want to get somebody to help us think hey i'll make these little segments that we can take our creativity and instead of me thinking man i gotta write this huge crazy script for just kind of small things you know little moments yeah can you help me make this happen
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
Is it crazy being like semi-Asian, part Asian? Yeah, my parents are Chinese. Oh, nice, man. Is it crazy being Asian and then having that happen to Asian people with the bomb? Like, is that a weird thing there or it's nothing?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
Yeah. Who's the current leader in AI development? Like is it America? Is it China? Is it Israel? Is it – I'm trying to think of another superpower. Russia maybe? Or yeah, who is it? Taiwan I know has a lot of the chips. Yeah. And they manufacture a lot of the chips over there. And does it matter what country leads in AI or does it just matter the company like scale or another AI company?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
Yeah, how would they use it to have a better military? Why is that kind of a concern or potential concern?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
They know I'm a pervert. I'll tell you that. Yeah, look at this. This happened in 2020. Salt Typhoon is widely understood to be operated by China's Ministry State of Security. It's foreign intelligence service and secret police. Chinese embassy denied all allegations saying it was unfounded and irresponsible smears and slanders. High profile cyber espionage. In 2024, U.S.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
officials announced that hackers affiliated with Salt Typhoon had accessed the computer systems of nine U.S. telecommunications companies, later acknowledged to include Verizon, AT&T, T-Mobile, Spectrum, Lumen, Consolidated Communications, and Windstream. The hackers were able to access metadata of users' calls and text messages. Fuck, homie. We're fucked, dude. I am. You seem good.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
Including date and timestamps, source and destination IP addresses. Ah, shit. Keep going, keep going. And phone numbers from over a million users, most of which were located in Washington, D.C. Good. Light them up, dude. In some cases, the hackers were able to obtain audio recordings of telephone calls made by high profile individuals.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
Such individuals reportedly included staff of the Kamala Harris 2024 presidential campaign as well as phones belonging to Donald Trump and J.D. Vance. According to Deputy National Security Advisor Ann Neuberger, a large number of the individuals whose data was directly accessed were government targets of interest. Wow. Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
That's – so do you think this also that that whole thing could be not real and it's just a story that was created?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
Oh, security clearance. Yeah. I thought you meant what was on sale. I was like, who cares? That's great, though. Damn. Oh, damn. So they knew everybody who knew. Oh, who knew information. Who knew secrets. Yeah. So once they knew that, then they know, well, that's a great point of operation to go then. Well, now let's find their data.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
And I think that shaped- Yeah, it's like the scientific John Jones over there, really. He's a New Mexican, isn't he?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
Yeah. It's exciting kind of. I mean it's unfortunate, but it's also exciting. I like some espionage. I can't sleep unless somebody is fucking really going through it. But then – But that's a real AI thing. So AI can be used to do that because you can like prompt it to go and do things like that.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
Oh, sweet, man. Yeah, yeah. Oh, yeah. So you're there, there's this energy always there of this creation. And so probably the possibility of creation maybe was always in the air. I'm just wondering, like, how did you get formed kind of, you know? Yeah. Like what's your origin story kind of?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
Yeah, we had Craig Newmark who created Craigslist on, and he was talking about how what if they hacked everybody's Teslas to all just drive off a cliff one day, or they hacked everybody's ovens to go up to 400 degrees in the middle of the night while you're sleeping, and then fires started.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
Just things like that that you don't start to think about that once something's connected to the grid or something like that or connected through routers and Wi-Fis that that could be feasible. Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
Propaganda, is that the word you're looking for?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
Well, it's unbelievable. I'll see stories even about – I'll be going through TikTok and see a story come up about something in my life that is not even true. Insane. Some of it looks fun, but never was a part of my existence. And then you'll see hundreds of people have said something about it. And they'll have friends that will ask me about it. I'm like, that's just crazy. Totally.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
So, yeah, it's amazing to think of how many things we're watching or absorbing that are just – are created just to dilute us. I don't know if dilute is the word, is it?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
Just to fucking Halloween us out. Wow. So there was a lot of interesting things. You know, what's crazy, man, some things makes life scary, but then it also makes it interesting. You know, it also makes it interesting in a, in a, in a fun way. How do we, how much do we have to fear, say if a certain country or a certain company owns an AI, right. In that country and that company,
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
if they're Chinese, if they have a certain religious belief, or they have information that they don't, they want to adjust history, how much would a company be able to like, say they keep certain data out of their information system? And then after a while, if that's a company that kind of takes the lead in AI or one of the main ones, then the truth could disappear.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
Is that true that if somebody loaded it just with the data that wasn't factual that we could start to not have the truth? Is that – does that make any sense or no?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
Oh, let's talk about something. Not only does it say it's beyond my scope, it says let's talk about something else.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
That is a great, hey, let's talk about something else, huh? Wow, get this Yao Ming jersey, homie. But, and people always, people also have to remember about China that they are, that's their whole government. Their whole system is like that. So sometimes when people are like China does this, but that's how they're built, right?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
They're built to like only give out certain information to their people and to have communism, right?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
Yeah. So, I mean, but that could also happen with American companies, right? We can have an American company that owns it and they only want certain information in there. That could happen anywhere like China. That's probably going to be because that's their M.O. sort of.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
Oh, yeah. They let that – Bring him up. Oh, 100 Acre Wood gang, son. I was out there, boy. I was out there, bro. Christopher Robbins, dude. Get him up. Oh, he does. Yeah. That's awesome.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
Right. So it's heavily regulated there where it's not – that's not the case here.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
And here's an example right here just to interrupt you but so we get the point in. Does Winnie the Pooh look like any world leaders? And that's on the Chinese version. And it says, I am sorry. Can I answer that question? I'm an AI assistant designed to provide helpful and harmless responses.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
Whereas the chat GBT says, Winnie the Pooh has often been compared to world leaders, particularly Xi Jinping, president of China. Boy, wow. Hmm.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
But it's just funny. Yeah. One. So it just shows you how that can easily happen.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
Hell yeah, boy. Shout out Brian Purvis, dude. They're recognized as the titular nationality of the of a region in northwest China. And they they're sending them to rehabilitation camps to change their views and information.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
Persecution of the Uyghurs in China. Since 2014, the government of the PRC, People's Republic of China, has committed a series of ongoing human rights abuses against the Uyghurs and other Turkish Muslim minorities in Xinjiang, which has often been characterized as persecution or as genocide. Wow. They got their own Gaza rocking over there. It's pretty bad. It's unfortunate, man. It's pretty bad.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
Mass detention, government policies, and forced labor. And they're just trying to change the way that they think and view stuff.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
Every place has done this over the years. And that's the craziest thing about history. It's like every place is guilty of this same thing. Totally. And it just – it's unfortunate. So it's hard to point fingers. I mean you can point them, but you have to point one at your own people as well.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
Yeah. And you know what's weirdly, and I hate to say this, maybe it's silly, I don't know, it might be a blessing and a curse sometimes. Because sometimes it's like you're- It's overwhelming. Yeah, you're so inundated with the overwhelmingness of what's often is not the best stuff. Sometimes you get a lot of humor stuff too.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
Like, yeah, because the rest of us in other communities, shitty communities or whatever, we're just making that volcano or whatever. You know what I'm saying? We're doing like grassroots level bullshit, you know? Dang, that's got to be wild. So every you see somebody just sneaking behind an alley and buying a bit of uranium and shit like that in your neighborhood, that's got to be kind of unique.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
in social media reels, but you can get scrolling, you get caught in some. Yeah. And it starts to feed you. That's the sickness of it. It's like, Hey, we, this isn't, we know this information probably to make you feel good. They're not thinking about it like that.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
They're just a machine, but you know, it doesn't, it adds stress to your, it makes you agitated towards a group or ethnicity or something or yourself even. And then you continue to – it continues to feed it to you. Do you fear that that could happen to AI from our government? Like have you been approached by the government to try and – because you work with the government some, right?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
Is that one of your biggest employers? Or is that employer, employee? Customers, customers. Is that one of your biggest customers?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
Really. You've known about the relationship between government and, um, technology technology.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
Um, But no, I don't think, I mean, I... Dude, you should be a superhero almost, dude. It's kind of crazy. Math, you know? Yeah. It goes a long way. Oh, hell yeah, dude. Divide these nuts, dude. That's what I tell them.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
Do you – has the government tried to say that we need to make sure that – like could that happen in our country where the government also curtails what's –
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
Awesome. Thanks for this information. Um, you hear about like chip makers, Nvidia all the time, Taiwan, that place is just a hotbed for, uh, chips. Why is it a hotbed for chips? Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
Yeah. Is that true or not? I might make that up.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
They'll get all the chips. Frito Lamborghini, baby. They'd be running it all. They'd be running it all.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
So yeah, that's why Taiwan is – yeah, because you kind of hear about it in the whispers of like a potential place where there could be like a conflict.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
That's yeah, it's spooky. We're so blessed to have a place where at least we can sleep in peace, even if we're uncomfortable at times in our brains, you know, to not have that constant threat.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
Yeah. So you don't think you don't think that you don't worry that the government will regulate right now. It's not it's not a concern at the moment.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
Would you think they could regulate the amount of chips that you're allowed to have?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
So did you feel competitive or did you just feel like hyper capable? Like, did you feel like kind of advanced just in your studies? Like when you were young, like did you, in class, you're like, oh, some of this stuff's kind of coming easy to me.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
Damn, finally, dude. 560 interviews, we got a good question.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
Yeah. Cause it's a possibility to run it all. Yeah, exactly. He's got the chips. What do you think about it?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
Are there uses of AI that you feel like cross the line kind of?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
That's what I worry about. Because it could happen. We don't realize how easily we're influenced. Little things that influence us. Yeah. And even just a turning of a phrase or a little bit of this or pointing you to a couple of lengths in your life could lead you down a whole world. It's kind of – it's pretty fascinating. So people that could – people that had – How do you keep your AI clean?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
With Outlier, that's your program? Yep. With Outlier, how are you – what type of people are applying for those jobs? Can people just log on and start to – and submit applications? Like how does that work to become an information sourcer? Yeah, we call them contributors. Okay, information contributor.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
You do? Yeah. So jobs where people are able to contribute information, jobs where people are able to, like what? Like what would examples of those be? Just some of the ones you've already listed?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
Where would a young person go right now who's getting into college or doesn't even want to go to college, but this is the world they want to get into and be one of those people? What do they do right now?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
All tickets at theovon.com slash T-O-U-R. Today's guest is from Los Alamos, New Mexico. He's a leader in the world of business and technology. He's an entrepreneur. He started Scale AI, a company recently valued at $14 billion. He started it when he was only 19 and at 24, he became the youngest self-made billionaire in the world.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
But like, where do they go to school? Is there a school? Is there a class that they should take online? Like how does someone start to become, you know, just get a head start on what could potentially be probably a lot of job opportunities, I'm guessing.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
Like in the AI space, right? Yeah. Like, is it just, is it just engineers? Like, is it just mathematicians? Like,
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
So – But are there colleges offering – like is there – do you know like is there specific places where people can – because that's another thing. I think it's like I'm going to work in AI and you're like, what do I do? Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
That'd be pretty cool if you had your own kind of like course, not that you had to teach it all that, you know, but you were like a partner of it somehow.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
What are some jobs that could that could be at risk because of AI? Right. Because you start thinking that like, yeah, before I was talking to you, there's this general fear of like everything could be at risk. Right. But when you think about it, you're like, yeah, these are some jobs that I mean, they won't disappear, but there might be less of them. Right.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
Because a lot of our fans are probably just blue-collar listeners, like just people that work in – like you're not going to – you're still going to need a plumber. You're still going to need an electrician. You're still going to need anything where you have to physically do something. You're probably still going to need. Yeah, for sure.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
But can you have that many managers, you think?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
Right, because you need air traffic controllers. You need as many of them as you can have.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
Right, but I mean in any field, you're going to need like just more managing. You need more people to oversee and make sure that different things are happening because some of the smaller tasks will just be outsourced. Yeah, and just so much more stuff is going to be happening, right? And that's kind of – Yep. That's a good point. Yeah, you don't think about that.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
Once some of the things at the first level of certain businesses are handled more easily by AI, then you're going to be able to have more people operating at a higher level.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
Barbecue cook-offs, man. I'll tell you that. The second some of those guys got the weekend off, they was grilling shit that I knew.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
Yeah, what companies do you see like – are there companies where you're the youngest billionaire in the world ever or no? Is that true? Is that a weird statement? We can take it out if it is. I'm not trying to talk about your money. I mean you – but you are. Is that true?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
As a young entrepreneur, right? And you've been very successful, you know, the self-made billionaire. And we can take the word billionaire out later if you decide you don't want it in. I just don't know how certain people feel about that. And the founder of Scale AI, where do you invest? Like, are you investing your money in certain places, like certain fields that you see continuing to do well?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
And then I. Yeah, it definitely does. Yeah, it's funny because I grew up in humid, dude. Like you would like you try to shake somebody's hand. You couldn't even land it because it was just not enough viscose, just too much lube in a handshake. You sit there for 10 minutes trying to land a handshake. You know, everybody was always dripping, you know, all the time.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
uh, what are some of the things that excite you about technology right now? Like what are, where do you see like AI and technology in five years, 10 years?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
Yeah, because I always envision this. There's like a time where it's like, OK, this group lives forever and this group doesn't. And there's just that parting of two different way. You know, people head not in just into the end zone of the Lord. And then there's other people just loiter who are going to be loitering around for a long time. And what that would be like that cut off, you know?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
Yeah, it's a weird it's a weird thought. Um, cause it would also be brave. I mean, you'd be the astronaut. I mean, dying, you're just an astronaut really into the ether. You don't know what's going on. Yeah. Totally. Lewis and Clark at a Lord at that point, you were out there. Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
And then if you stay, you kind of are always going to be no, you'll always know kind of what's going to happen in a way. Cause you'll be here.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
which would be exciting, I think. But then after a while, you might be like, dang, what happens if you die? That's the bravest choice you could make.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
Do you see AI having any effect on religion?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
People you always thought they were scared or something or they were kind of geeked up off a gas station dope or something. But people were just as humid. Yeah, you get really humid over there.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
What's a place like – so if I go to ChatGPT, is that scale AI? Is that the same thing or it's different?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
And do we know if the answer came from your company or other companies if we ask it a question? Like how do we –
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
How can a regular person just at their home, right? Say there's a guy who's been listening to this today and wants to go home today and he just wants to learn a little bit of how AI works. He could just go on the chat GPT and ask it a couple of questions. Yeah, you could ask ChatGPT how AI works. You could ask it, what's the history of my town? Can you research my last name?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
Maybe see where it came from. Maybe what are some innovations that could happen in the next few years? There's different little things. You can just ask it. That's how you can start to have a relationship with asking and learning about using- And you're seeing what it's good at, what it's not good at.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
And I would- And you have to wear a vest. What do you guys do? Is there a uniform for that?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
you know all powerful and whatnot but uh yeah you think of it as a robot that's gonna show up and just start driving your truck around or something and you're like well what the fuck do i do you know what i'm saying yeah keys were in my truck you know i can't even get in my house now like i think that's the there is this boogeyman fear yeah yeah but that's not the truth
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
Well, getting to learn and learn how to use it, small ways, whatever, is certainly a way that you're going to start to realize what it is. Yeah. And it's easy to just sit there and say it's horrible and without trying to use it or learn about it. Yeah, sometimes I won't learn about something just so I can continue to say it's a boogeyman, you know, because it kind of gives me an excuse. Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
You know, if I choose not to learn about it in my own life. ChatGPT has become like a proprietary like platform. name like band-aids or um ping pong is that okay that it's like that
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
You got that Draco on you, baby. I feel you keep strapped.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
Could AI just create a better AI at a certain point? Like, could it just be like, Hey, I create a better AI and it could do that.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
That's scary because then it's making kind of choices then. It's becoming the lifeguard. It's becoming the water and the coast guard. Yeah. Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
Yeah. And in the end, you can always shut off your computer and phone and go for a walk, huh? Yes. Yeah, totally. It's not like it's going to come out and just, you know, slurp you off or something if you're trying to be straight or whatever, you know, and it's a man. I don't even know. Is AI male or female? I don't think it has a gender. Wow. I wonder if it'll decide one day.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
You're a self-made billionaire, which is pretty fascinating. Congratulations, I think, to have – I think that money is energy kind of, and it kind of flows to certain places and stuff. And congratulations. That's got to be fascinating. Was that scary when that kind of happened? That you just made some money? Was that kind of a scary thing? Did you guys grow up really well?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
And is it, what's this math circle like? Is there, wow, that's crazy, dude. So you go to, are there competitions you go to with that?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
Yeah. It's fascinating. It's almost like you were just standing on like the bingo number they got called kind of by time.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
Oh, yeah. I can only imagine that. Are your parents pretty proud of you? What's that like?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
And in Asian culture, that's like not a thing you do, right?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
Yeah, that is like the opposite of being Asian.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
Yeah, they're like, Alex is not doing good. No, that might've been Spanish. But they're like, yeah, Alex is not doing good.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
That's cool. Yeah. I don't even, I think do, are your parents, are your grandparents from China or no?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
Did your, does your family have a lot of Chinese culture?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
Oh, for sure. I think most people probably think of – I mean I don't know. It's funny. I never thought about that. I definitely think about him as different. I definitely don't think if I see a Chinese person, I don't think, oh, that's a communist person. Yeah, exactly. I mean that would be – yeah, that's crazy. I think that's crazy if some people thought that.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
I just – yeah, I think somebody has a crazy long history like damn. And then maybe almost a – do you feel like there's – some people in certain parts of China are almost like a captured people then? Do you think that's a thing?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
I didn't even know about that, man. Thanks for putting me up on that Uyghur game.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
Wow, fucking wizards in the park. A couple dudes fucking fighting over a common denominator in the lobby. That's crazy, bro.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
Yeah. With being somebody that's able to be smart and conceptualize stuff, do you start to get, do you have any insight? This might be the last question I have for you. Do you have any insight on like the afterlife or what happens? Like, I never really thought about it for like talking to like a real math guy about that. Yeah, I think.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
Like what's the total, like what's the sum zero game or whatever, you know, what's the.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
That was a shitty joke, but thank you. Oh, yeah, because the – yeah, E equals MC squared, all that kind of stuff. I know what that kind of stuff is. Jesus. Sorry, but I started pretending.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
So you don't get some deeper thought about like since your brain is able to be – because you have probably a unique brain, right? Yeah. And more I mean, you know, and everybody has a unique brain, but I've just never asked somebody with your I've never asked your brain this question. Yeah. Do you do you get some further insight about like what you think happens when you die? You know.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
Or if we advanced it enough that we're able to make this happen. Yeah. Seem real.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
Yeah. No, dude, competition's amazing, man. That's one thing that's so nice I think about when you're young is like if you're involved in a sport or a group or whatever it was, just that chance to be competitive, you know? Yeah. What were like some of the competitions at the math thing? Like what's a math competition like when you get there?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
Could we be avatars? Yeah. For some, for some other thing. Yeah, exactly. Damn, dude. I'll say this. My avatar is a pervert, brother. Have you met any guys like Jinsun Hong? Is that his name? Yeah, yeah. You have? Yeah, totally. Wow. What is it like when you meet some of these guys? Have you met Elon yet?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
He's the fucking, he's the, he's turning. Jensen's the goat. Yeah, Kanye, he is?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
He's just sitting there. He's there learning with people who are detoxing.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
Yeah. We have to research him a little bit. Maybe we would get to talk with him one day.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
Yeah, man. It's just so funny. Whenever I met you, I just didn't – I figured that since you were with Sam Altman that you were probably a tech guy. But yeah, I didn't know – I think maybe somebody said he's in the AI verse. But you just seem like such a totally – like I would not have thought that – You were just – I don't know.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
I guess sometimes you think like somebody is going to be – they're going to be like super quiet or not have a lot of different thoughts. But yeah, it was cool, man. We had a good time. I'm glad we got to link up. Yeah, totally. That was cool, bro. You're probably like my – you might even be my first Chinese friend. I don't think – second. Probably Bobby Lee who's denying it, but he'll come around.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
Alexander Wang, man, thank you so much, dude. I bet your whole family is super proud of you. Yeah, it's exciting, man. Thank you for coming and spending time with us and just helping us learn and think.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
Yeah. No, man. I definitely feel differently about it. I feel like it's a tool that I can use, right? And even I don't know how to use it. So I'm trying to figure out, you know, one more question.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
How do you keep it from becoming like a like a advertisement trap house like the Internet's become like the Internet's just pop ups and ads and fucking Best Buy trying to like beat you over the head on some shit? Like, how do you stop that? How do you keep that out of like you guys's waters? Or do you have to go there at some point to make money?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
Yeah. I think there would be value in staying as pure as you could if you could find a way to – if there's other money to be made on the side, it almost seems sometimes like it could be a trap. Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
Gang, baby. wang gang alexander wang man thanks so much bro yeah thanks so much for having me yeah it was awesome man danny kane shout out to danny um who came up and danny lives in franklin right we got to get to spend some time with him yeah lives in franklin whenever you're out there and shout out to uh alex brucewitz who uh who we met through yeah who else on your team's here man today
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
Nice. We'll have to get a group picture. We'll put it up at the end. Thank you, guys. Have a good one.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
Okay. Yeah, there you go. Okay. A participant must be either a U.S. citizen or a legal resident of the U.S. Okay. Okay, go on.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
Dang, you out there rattling, brother. Oh, integers make me rattle, brother. I feel you on that. Dude, so that's pretty – so you're competitive, and so you get out of there, and you're obviously, I guess, admired in the world of math probably, or that's like a thing that you can point – that's like a pin, a feather in your cap. So that helps you get into MIT, right? Yep. Okay.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
We talk about his company, the future of AI, and the role it plays in our human existence. This was super educational for me. I hope it is for you. I'm grateful for his time. Today's guest is Mr. Alexander Wang. Alexander Wang, man, thanks for hanging out, bro. Yeah, thanks for having me. Yeah, good to see you, dude. Last time was at the inauguration. Yeah, what'd you think of that?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
so if you're so so you knew a lot of kids going there probably because it was tons of kids yeah yeah tons of kids it was like a reunion it was like math camp reunion damn because i was wondering where all y'all were at dude because we were doing some other shit you know what i'm saying my yeah we were not god that's where all the smart kids were that's fascinating man
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
Yeah. Damn. So it's really severe there. There's a lot of work. They load you down out of the gate? Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
Um, what's that social life like there? Like, are you dating? Are you going to parties? What's that like for you at that time?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E563 AI CEO Alexandr Wang
And then what about when the science kids come through, the lab dogs, are they bringing, are people making like unique drug, was there like designer drugs that were being created by actual people? Like just, because, you know what I'm saying? Like my friends in college, none of us would know how to do that, but there may be somebody at a smart, at a more prestigious school that would know how.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#568 - Danny McBride
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#568 - Danny McBride
He's like a just like a teddy bear that's been like not in a halfway house, but definitely like. like bootcamp, like could have been a wrestler type of energy. Like, yeah. And he's fearless.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#568 - Danny McBride
He was like, just, um, yeah, it was awesome just for him to be in there. Did you cast for him? Like, were you the picker for him?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#568 - Danny McBride
Yeah, he's special. And he drank out of those little creamer cups. I saw him drink a couple of those in a row.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#568 - Danny McBride
Yeah, yeah. He definitely seems like a hug that got left somewhere but rescued. That's right.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#568 - Danny McBride
Yeah, we texted a little bit after. I got to touch base with him and say, hey, but that was just crazy. And it's just crazy. Like you see people and you're like, oh, this works for casting because we would have friends that would send in videos and some of them are like audition tapes. And then you're like, oh, man, that's my friend. But it just doesn't fit for this thing.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#568 - Danny McBride
It's just not the right fit. It's like it's super specific kind of to watch. because I used to just put in audition tapes and I would never get booked for anything. And I was like, but then this time we're getting the videos in. Cause we're doing the casting. You're like, Oh, first of all, I see why I never got anything.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#568 - Danny McBride
Like my shit was very obtuse, but then, but then you'd have friends that would send a role and you're like, Oh, this is almost perfect. Or this would be kind of risky, but it might be adventurous. It was, that was probably one of the most fun things I think about creating something.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#568 - Danny McBride
It is hard. And drive over there and be depressed while you're driving over there, trying to do your lines and be in traffic. Sitting in a lobby where it's a bunch of dudes who look kind of like you. Sucks. Yeah. Oh God, dude. Yeah. That was some of the tough, like I did that for probably six or seven years probably. And I never had any hope that I was going to, I almost did it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#568 - Danny McBride
I think, I don't even know why I was doing it. I think you're just in LA also when you're young enough, you have the energy to do it. Um, with fist foot way, you didn't write that, right? Jody Hill wrote it. Me and Jody wrote it together. Um, yeah. and you guys shot that on, on super 16 or no super 16. Yep. Okay. And you made that without going through sag and stuff, right?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#568 - Danny McBride
It's just like a cream coffee. I'll have a medium. That's crazy, dude. Good to see you today, Danny McBride. Thanks for hanging out. We're on. This is happening. We're doing it, huh? Yeah. Is it okay? Perfect. I was waiting for this. Yeah, yeah. I just definitely just have been one of those days where it's like my skin feels all dry and stuff. I wonder why that is. I don't know.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#568 - Danny McBride
And what do you what do you notice that's easier about doing a film like that or doing something where you have to go through all the where everything is more, you know, guilds and all of that?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#568 - Danny McBride
Yeah. Yeah, it's definitely interesting. Like we got – we made this movie and now we're figuring out like we wrote it and everything. We funded it ourselves. So it's super scary because you're like all you really have right now is this piece of debt kind of. Yeah. And then it's like too long right now. It's just like we've got to figure it out. It just seems like – I don't know.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#568 - Danny McBride
The whole thing has been super fascinating. Yeah, it's a crazy process.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#568 - Danny McBride
Yeah, do you envy things about the entertainment industry right now as opposed to whenever you kind of first got into it? You know what I find interesting is like I –
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#568 - Danny McBride
But something new will come out of it, right? That's how you kind of think, like, how does this evolve? What happens next? You know, that sort of thing. Was there a movie that you wrote or a role or some little piece of something that you wanted to do that once you started to get a little older? Because sometimes I'm like, fuck, this thing for me would have been great like seven years ago.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#568 - Danny McBride
I think I could have pulled it off. But now it's like, do you ever think like that? Like, was there some like... Was there something you had you were like, fuck, now I'm going to have to cast somebody to do it instead of do it?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#568 - Danny McBride
Wow. Yeah. Yeah, because that's what I think about. I had this idea for this thing. It was like Sinkhole Baby, right? Like a guy, like the sole survivor of a sinkhole, right? Yeah, Sinkhole Baby. In a small town, right? And people are like, they fucking love him because he made it because God picked him.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#568 - Danny McBride
I don't know how hydration became like the hot thing in the past 10 years. Is that it? People only started drinking water and hydrating the last 10 years, you think? It's more prevalent. People like stay hydrated and stuff. I just think it feels more – it's more popular for sure. You're in Burbank though.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#568 - Danny McBride
And at the cafe, they even have like a little oatmeal there, but they put a raisin in it like at the town cafe. That's him. That's Sinkhole Baby. That's him, yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#568 - Danny McBride
Well, because – But then what happens is it creates a lot of hype when something happens to you that you didn't plan, right? Like suddenly you're a celebrity, but how do you live up to that in a small town when you didn't really do anything? When really God did it with gravity and now you have to fucking live like the repercussions of being sinkhole baby.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#568 - Danny McBride
And then you go on tour with like other people like hit by lightning guy and fucking... I think you need to make this, dude. There's a story here. Look at this.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#568 - Danny McBride
And I think I don't know what the second half of it is sometimes.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#568 - Danny McBride
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#568 - Danny McBride
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#568 - Danny McBride
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#568 - Danny McBride
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#568 - Danny McBride
I'm hydrated. I'll say it. And I use liquid IV. That's how I do it. Just one stick packet of liquid IV. I open up a bottle of water. I pour just a touch out, just a sip. For the hydrators that aren't here, pour a little out for them, and then I pour that packet in, put the lid on, shake it up, and douse myself with that thick, good liquid.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#568 - Danny McBride
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#568 - Danny McBride
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#568 - Danny McBride
It's always balmy. Yeah. Sweaty. Oh, yeah. Wet. Oh, dude, I went to CFC for a semester. Did you really? Yeah. The College of Knowledge. Yeah, baby. I used to live on King Street over there right across. They had a Bebe store over there. It was like women's fine clothing or something. Unfortunately, I don't think it's still there. Or body textiles or something.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#568 - Danny McBride
Have you seen him? Oh, yeah. I love Shane. Have you gotten to meet him or no?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#568 - Danny McBride
You helped him produce it? Yeah, yeah. I didn't even know that. Yeah, because it's so funny that I think there's times that I see him and I'm like, oh, there's something about him that it's not just you, but there's something about the way he is. He's himself.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#568 - Danny McBride
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. He's a special guy. And he just like one look, he's like, yup. And you're in dude. Yeah. He makes me laugh. He does, man. He makes everybody laugh. It's good. And it's cool to see him. Like tires was kind of a comedy that I think kind of changed things because there's jokes in there that I feel like they wouldn't put on Netflix 10 years ago or even five years ago. Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#568 - Danny McBride
Yeah, I almost related – when you're saying that, it makes me feel like if you tweet something, you're just saying something. You're looking for controversy. It's like – but if you go out and make like – put out a conversation of something, then the response from people is different. It is. Like tweet, people just argue. There's all type of shit.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#568 - Danny McBride
But you go and actually put a conversation out, then it is more of like discussion and people at least respect that you had the conversation. Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#568 - Danny McBride
Yeah, Shane just did SNL. Did you get to see any of it? I did. I saw a couple beers. That's pretty funny shit. I need a couple beers in my personal life. I think that will fix a lot of things. Oh, yeah. I mean, I fucking used to overdose up there in Charleston, especially on Halloween. Dude, one year I made out with three ladybugs, dude. Oh, just the creatures, the ladybugs, the actual insects?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#568 - Danny McBride
They had a place called Silver Dollar. Yeah. Bar that we used to go to. I've been to that place before. Have you? Yep. Yeah, boy. Charleston's a pretty fun spot. God, it's great except I took a girl on one of the – I mean it's one of the – I think it's one of the five most unique cities in America. Totally. Totally.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#568 - Danny McBride
That's the Charleston decathlon right there, dude. Oh, yeah. Everything in Charleston seemed haunted. Did you – Shane just did SNL. Did you ever host SNL? I've never hosted SNL. Did you get asked to do it? Did you not want to? Or was it a thing? You know, the – Is there any real gravity there or am I just slurping around? No. Because I'll fucking shine this dick on myself if you need me to.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#568 - Danny McBride
God, yeah. Well, after seeing Kenny Powers, how do you think Kenny Powers would pitch against some of today's hitters, do you think?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#568 - Danny McBride
Bring it up. There's a new dope Olympics they're starting up. I love it. That's a great idea. The Trump son is starting up, which is kind of perfect. Is it really? It's an enhanced game, is what they call it? Enhanced game, brother. Oh, dude. That's also what I call my erection a lot of times. This is something else. Yeah, because I'm one of those pills. Yeah, a group led by Donald Trump Jr.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#568 - Danny McBride
is infusing funding and some political muscle into the enhanced games. Yeah. So what's the thought process here?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#568 - Danny McBride
Come over here. Yeah, it says he's offering $1 million for the first sprinter to break the 100-meter world record. Can you imagine some guy just – the rest of his body is falling off.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#568 - Danny McBride
Well, I'll tell you how you train in our town. You would meet up with the guy behind the Winn-Dixie and get some test 200. First of all, you would hide it from your wife and have to pull over on the side of the interstate and shoot. And you and your buddy who have been talking about how – who commonly refer to against gay folks have to pull over and shoot it into each other's rear ends.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#568 - Danny McBride
And I took a girl on like a carriage tour or whatever, and it was a black girl that I was dating at the time. And a lot of it's kind of – it gets a little – you know, some of the history around there is – Oh, yeah. They got some history around there. It's some risque history. So like in a certain point, I'm just – I'm like trying to tip the driver early. Like, dude, just – Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#568 - Danny McBride
But you're ready for the three-legged race with your buddy.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#568 - Danny McBride
Oh, thank you, man. It really is cool. You did the best for last. Well, it's nice of you to say that and lie to me, but I will say that. I waited in line one time to get a photo with you, like, probably maybe 10 years ago somewhere. Really? Where? I think it was at Comic-Con.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#568 - Danny McBride
Oh, I've had people come up to me and think I'm in the gym 20 times. I'll play along with it. Yeah, but this dude's so awesome, man. Tony's one of the greats. I love Tony. He's such a sweet guy.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#568 - Danny McBride
He's incredible. Somebody put her face right there. I didn't even notice that. Look at that one. No wonder some people think this shit. Oh, look at you, dude. Look at you. That's Trevor Wallace. That's hilarious. These days you don't even know. This is the magic of AI. Look at that. I'd buy it. I know. Wow. And it's very similar chests. Very similar. Yeah. How do you...
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#568 - Danny McBride
Yeah. Yeah. yeah, dude, I remember they had a gay fella in our town. He was a drug dealer. So everybody wanted drugs. So also that's how you also kind of like met gay guys, you know, or at the first time. So it was really cool treats, right? It was like, dude, yeah, these guys are fucking, but I think it did a lot for our town. Cause some people who may not have like, kind of like,
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#568 - Danny McBride
you know, branched out more, you know, or just like had more questions, suddenly you were sitting there high as hell. Yeah. And then more gay people started kind of like... Drugs are the great equalizer, right? Oh, yeah. It crosses every boundary known. Oh, God, yes.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#568 - Danny McBride
Oh, were the real-life pastors that you used to... that you sent your gemstone pastors like John Goodman and Baby Billy, do you send them... Did you have them reflect on guys? Did you go watch? Did you get some front row tickets to some Osteen? Or what were you doing?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#568 - Danny McBride
So, but dude, it's so fun there. And you go out to like the beach and stuff there. Do you guys spend time on the beach or what is your life like there?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#568 - Danny McBride
Oh, that's cool, man. Yeah, I'm trying to think if we had any puppeteer – like, no, what did we have? We had a guy who was missing one finger. Puppeting is a lot of shoulder work. People don't think about that. Got to have a lot of upper body strength. Yeah. Yeah. That's the French bulldog of the drama region. Yeah, you're really building those shoulders. Is your mom pretty proud of you?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#568 - Danny McBride
Wow. That's so cool, dude. You got to capture the whole dream. I think that's everybody's dream. I'm going to go. I'll show them. I'll move. I'll have the girl. I'll have the family.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#568 - Danny McBride
It's kind of awesome. Yeah. Yeah. I wonder. Yeah, I would like to get to meet a wife sometime soon. Where did you meet your wife at a certain location?
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#568 - Danny McBride
Yeah, and it's good. And you can kind of learn to surf there. People don't realize that. You can kind of learn to like baby surf there. There's just enough little wave action. Just the perfect little waves, yeah.
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#568 - Danny McBride
Living that high life. I didn't want to say anything, but yeah, his grades are down, but the money's up. You know, it's his fucking life.
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#568 - Danny McBride
Yeah, and they take a girl like on a world tour and then you're like answers to what take her where for a walk Yeah, how am I even gonna compete? Dude, I remember on my birthday, I got out here. I've been out here for like a year and I bought a used refrigerator, right? I was saving. When I finally went and looked at the price, I was probably saving $60, right? Nightmare.
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#568 - Danny McBride
Had to borrow somebody's truck to go get it out towards Reseda, get it back home on my birthday. I spent my birthday doing this. I get it over to the door of our apartment and it gets, it will not go in. It's just a little too wide. So now I have to take the fucking doors. I just, I remember sitting against the wall crying.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#568 - Danny McBride
I was on steroids, but I was also sitting there just, and dude, parking spots were too small. You'd open the, you couldn't get out. You'd get a ticket and you would ding. Everything about LA was fucking impossible.
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#568 - Danny McBride
It's so crazy that when you go from an idea like – even with this – like it was all emails and then we show up one day on set and there was a real movie going on. Dude, I had to sit down for a while. I was like, oh my god. I thought everybody was just fucking around.
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#568 - Danny McBride
And then it was a real movie and there was like people and people don't know what they're doing and people do know what they're doing. People are yelling and people are – but there was, it was like, Oh my God, this is really it. And then you realize it's so hard to make something really too. Cause so many little things happen.
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#568 - Danny McBride
Like we got pushed by the fire for a week and it was like, suddenly that changes everything. And you have, you don't know if people are. And then we had to shoot one day, the day with Steve little where it's like the winds were 40 miles an hour. We can't afford to reshoot. So it's like, Fucking pretend that the winds are 40 miles an hour.
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#568 - Danny McBride
Damn. Yeah. I think it's just no matter what level things are at, if you're doing something in your backyard and you and your brother plan to shoot something and then halfway through he doesn't like his attitude changes and he goes in the house.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#568 - Danny McBride
It's like it's always and that ruins it. Whatever your little plan was. It's always something. Right. There's always something that's going to show up. How do you know when a show is done like this?
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#568 - Danny McBride
Full terms go to the Panera Store page on DoorDash. Today's guest is a comedian, an actor, a writer, and a director known for some of the funniest shows that anyone has ever seen. He's going into his fourth season and final season of Righteous Gemstones, which just kicked off on HBO. Vice Principals Eastbound and Down. He's a legend, and he's one of the most requested human beings ever.
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#568 - Danny McBride
Was there something special that you like to do for your crew and stuff like that? You talk so much about the guys that work for you and work with you. I'm sure you use a lot of the same crew and stuff too because you develop relationships. You know how people are going to work. You know what people will be there for you when it's 1 a.m. and you're like, what the fuck are we going to do right now?
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#568 - Danny McBride
What's something you like to do for them? I've heard that you do nice things for them.
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#568 - Danny McBride
Dude, but is there anything a little bit dicier than being an adult boogie boarder at a certain point?
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#568 - Danny McBride
Yeah, I noticed I don't like the acting part. I noticed I like giving somebody an idea and not telling the other actors and stuff. It's fun. Try this, dude. Yeah, and then seeing what that creates. Yeah, that's the beauty of it all. Yeah, we had this one moment.
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#568 - Danny McBride
Spade is taking this dog for a ride because the company he works for, this company called Last Lap, they give dogs rides that are about to be euthanized or whatever. He gives them a couple more spins around town in his car. That's nice. That's a nice thing to do. Yeah, sweet guy. So he pulls up, and then it's like – Kirk Fox, you know who he is? Mm-hmm. Kirk Fox pulls up next to him in a truck.
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#568 - Danny McBride
And Kirk's just been like looting in the area. I guess sort of stoplight. And he's like, what are you guys? You guys get anything good? He's like, yeah, we just got a hot lead on JonBenet's wedding dress. Right?
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#568 - Danny McBride
That was out of your pocket? And I snuck over just like a fucking – like a fucking Navy SEAL. I just put this little fucking – I just shined that cock right in his soul. And then I went off and hit in the distance. And that's what I noticed. That's the only thing I always loved. I always liked – even when we were a kid, like we would go like –
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#568 - Danny McBride
The wives are always just standing in the distance, just waiting. Shaking heads. Yeah. I'm in it for the children.
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#568 - Danny McBride
like not getting molested, what's called camping with people's dads. Right. And getting molested. No, you were right. The first thing you said was right. It was like Cub Scouts or whatever. But I remember one time we left and I told everybody that Jay Leno had died. Right. Right. And you couldn't check back then.
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#568 - Danny McBride
So the whole weekend you would hear the dads talking about it, kind of reminiscent about Leno and some of their favorite guests and shit. And I would be in my tent laying down, crying out of my fucking little penis. I was crying out of laughing so fucking hard.
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#568 - Danny McBride
Probably keeping him off the end of a fucking rope, dude.
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#568 - Danny McBride
Yeah. Yeah, dude, there was something I remember like when I was a kid, we used to, well, we'd get, one thing we'd do for fun, I remember the mosquito truck would come by and we'd get on our bikes and fucking ride behind it and just huff the gas. Just get high. Bro, we would be fucking cooked, dude. Just like unbelievable. A trail of dead mosquitoes around. Everybody's singing.
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#568 - Danny McBride
Dude, bro, if I went near a bird, it would die after that. Anything that could fucking hit the airwaves was dead. I couldn't even pick up AM radio, bro. I was like, anything that could fly, that was something fun, I remember. I remember being in the woods and somebody would say like, I saw something, and then you would run. The fear that went – you didn't see anything.
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#568 - Danny McBride
Somebody did, and they started to leave, and suddenly you were alone. Even if you were one step alone in the woods from your friend, it was like, it's going to get me.
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#568 - Danny McBride
dude I'm trying oh we had a glitter I don't know if it was a glitter truck I think it was a glitter truck that toppled over like in the interstate near us and it was like and it was like kind of I guess a windy time of year and our fucking town had glitter in the area for two years in your lungs everywhere I mean you couldn't even you just you'd meet somebody and half of them would have fucking they're shining it's crazy dude
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#568 - Danny McBride
Those are good days. It is crazy how if you have a construction site, if you're building a house, if any kids in the neighborhood, all they do is get in there and break shit.
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#568 - Danny McBride
I enjoy what do a mechanic and an auto shop owner in Georgia, a taco restaurant operator in Arizona, and a life-saving medical innovator in Tennessee have in common? They're all small business owners, and they're all thriving on TikTok. Across the U.S., over 7.5 million businesses, from family-owned shops to entrepreneurs, are using TikTok to compete and grow.
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#568 - Danny McBride
In fact, 74% of businesses on TikTok say TikTok TikTok has allowed them to scale their operations, increasing sales and expanding to new locations. And that growth means jobs. Today, there are over 7.5 million U.S. businesses on TikTok, employing more than 28 million people. And that number keeps growing. Small businesses thrive on TikTok. Learn more about TikTok's contribution to the U.S.
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#568 - Danny McBride
economy at tiktokeconomicimpact.com. Using Acorns, I enjoy setting it up. I got it set up for my nieces and nephews. It just to help them start to save, right? To recognize and look at money and finances and just have it be a part of their existence. Acorns is a financial wellness app that makes it easy to start saving and investing for your future. You don't need to be an expert.
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#568 - Danny McBride
Acorns will recommend a diversified portfolio that matches you and your money goals. You don't need to be rich. Acorns lets you get started with the spare money you've got right now, even if all you've got is spare change. That's what I like about it for my nieces and nephews. If they spend a little bit of money, the change goes into their savings.
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#568 - Danny McBride
So they start to recognize, they start to get an idea of how to use savings. Right now with Acorns, you can sign up and join the over 14 million all-time customers who have already saved and invested over $25 billion with Acorns. Plus, Acorns will boost your new account with a $20 bonus investment offer available at acorns.com slash T-H-E-O.
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#568 - Danny McBride
That's A-C-O-R-N-S dot com slash Theo to get your $20 bonus investment today. I can't recommend them more.
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#568 - Danny McBride
I know it's March. I know it's May. Here I am. That's just who I am. Life in general can be chaotic. But if you're in charge of order fulfillment for an e-commerce business, you know that's its own special kind of chaos. But with ShipStation, you can count on your day-to-day remaining calm.
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#568 - Danny McBride
Save hours and money every month by shipping from all your stores with one login, automating repetitive tasks, and finding the best rates among all the global carriers. Using ShipStation helped us ship. Helps us get packages in and out. We got to get some of this. Some of that Celsius is sending a new. We got to get merch. Boom. Ship station. They're there. You never need to upgrade.
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#568 - Danny McBride
Ship station grows with your business no matter how big it gets. Calm the chaos of order fulfillment with the shipping software that delivers. Switch to ShipStation today. Go to ShipStation.com and use code Theo to sign up for your free trial. That's ShipStation.com, code T-H-E-O. Yeah, that's the stuff that I think sometimes about getting older.
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#568 - Danny McBride
Do you ever start to think like that you only get to do so many things? Does that start to become a thing in your head at all? I mean, you've been so proclivative or whatever it's called, but Prophylactics. Prophylactics, yeah. You've been so prophylactic. But do you ever start to think about that?
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#568 - Danny McBride
Like, shit, I got to – or is it kind of like, no, I've had a good amount of time to make what I've wanted?
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#568 - Danny McBride
Yeah. Or if you see an old guy, you put a limping on him just to fucking... I make my cats chase it around the house. It's pretty useful. Oh, yeah, dude. There's nothing cooler than that, seeing some cats chasing a little cock around. Those are the good old days, you know? Bro, thank you. This is so nice, man. I've had two really neat gifts, and this is definitely one of them. Cherish it forever.
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#568 - Danny McBride
Yeah. Some dry. Well, yeah, I want him to beat up some drywall. Yeah, I moved to Nashville a few years ago and I like it over there. I just live in like a regular neighborhood. My neighbors are just like soccer coach. It's like just it's neat. You know, I like it. It's more peaceful. It feels just like a like a very small city. Yeah, Nashville's fun. I like it down there. I think it's cool.
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#568 - Danny McBride
It's fun over there, definitely. And yeah, it's like Chattanooga is fucking great. You've been there? I haven't been there. God, dude. It's fun, huh? Yeah, just like there's like mountains, whitewater rafting. It's almost everything you wish was in Nashville that isn't. Yeah. And it's smaller, feels good. Oh, I got to go over there.
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#568 - Danny McBride
Chattanooga is beautiful, man. They have this beautiful walking bridge where you walk. It's like it used to be a bridge, but they shut it down or whatever because it couldn't bridge anymore or whatever. So basically, it's just like it stopped bridging. Yeah, it's just like a brave road, really, at that point. But they turned it into a walking bridge. And so they built like a newer one next to it.
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#568 - Danny McBride
But it's – yeah, but just the whole area is awesome, man. It's beautiful. They have a place called Lookout Mountain there. We can see like seven states or something from it. A lot of Civil War shit if you're big into Civil War reenactments and shit. Like my buddy's dad used to referee those and shit. So we'd go watch those a lot and like – So I love that kind of shit. Me too.
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#568 - Danny McBride
He's writing his dad in prison. Dear dad, thanks for the rusty bayonets. It was worth every minute. Bro, that shit was a big part of growing up in the South. Somebody would be like, dude, they found arrowheads on our property. Rusty shit. They found a fucking canteen from 70 years ago. That was a huge thing about growing up in the South.
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#568 - Danny McBride
Very sweet of you. Was your neighborhood cool growing up, or was it like in a city? I know you grew up in Georgia. I know that. I was born in Georgia.
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#568 - Danny McBride
Yeah, dude. They had a guy who hid a treasure. Do you see that? He hid treasure for like 10 years. Somebody finally found it. Oh, wow. He hid a couple million dollar treasure and it finally got found a few years ago. He made like a treasure, like a story about it. Oh, gotcha. So he had like a little like put a call out. Scavenger hunt. And people looked for a few years.
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#568 - Danny McBride
A couple people died looking for it. Oh, that's sick. God, I used to always want to look for bodies on the side of the interstate. That's my big thing.
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#568 - Danny McBride
Yeah. Staying by I-65 is what it's going to be called. But yeah, that's something that I always wanted to do. I want to ask you about your kids before you leave. What's something that you admire about your children if you're OK talking about your children? Yeah, of course. You know, I just –
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#568 - Danny McBride
You know, to be able to make do choices like that, like with social media, just like to make kind of like choices that are for the betterment of yourself or others is pretty. It's harder to do these days than I think people think. So it's something that it seems pretty neat that you're able to do. But, yeah, go on.
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#568 - Danny McBride
Yeah, it seems like things are going good over there. Dude, my brother, so my dad was like real old when I was born. My dad was 70. He was an older man, you know? And so my brother used to do this thing. I've talked about it before on my comedy show, but he'd be like, dad's daddy, come in the room, right?
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#568 - Danny McBride
That was his bit because dad was like, you know, that would be 79 He'd come in I'd be doing something like dad's dead And I like, you know the first time I was like, no, no Don't you know and I go in there and he would be alive, right? And then it got to this is where this is where I knew this is when something I think got weird maybe in my head because I would be like He better fucking be dead
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#568 - Danny McBride
I'm going to beat your ass. Right. It became like like just the whole juxtaposition of that little thing in my head. Like he if I'm going to get up now, I better see a dead body.
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#568 - Danny McBride
Yeah, dude, I love that kind of stuff. I just, yeah, there was something so much fun about being young. And Michael Landon was supposed to come to our town one time and meet people at the fair, and my mom got all dressed up and went, and he didn't come.
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#568 - Danny McBride
Yeah, we like to have that. I'm a big Highway to Heaven fan. I'm a big Victor French fan. You kind of look like a young Victor French, actually. I'll take that.
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#568 - Danny McBride
God. That was good. It was so good. I wouldn't have pegged you for a Highway to Heaven fan. That's good to know. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Now, like the Olsons. Oh, yeah, look at him. Yeah, dude. Yeah, he's a good dude. Look at that.
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#568 - Danny McBride
It reminds me of the movie Family Man. Have you seen that movie? Which one is that? With Nicolas Cage. It's a Christmas movie. Oh, yeah, yeah. It's been a long time. But, yes, I remember that film. I love that movie, dude. That's one of my favorites. The first movie I ever saw, I think, was – yeah, that's it right there. Did you ever get to work with Nicolas Cage?
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#568 - Danny McBride
Party, dude. Let's amp this bitch up. Was there ever something weird like once you started making some money? Because making money is an interesting thing, right? Like some people really get into it and that's their thing. But it's like were there ever like a team that you wanted to invest in or some interesting thing that like, you know, that somebody might consider?
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#568 - Danny McBride
Yeah, that time I'm just scared. It's like, well, what if – yeah, just scary. And then also, what do I really want? Yeah. You know? I think I want to start like a halfway house, but that makes clothing too, dude. Oh, yeah. Put those fuckers to work. Be like, this shirt's dope. That's kind of a dumb joke, but thank you for laughing at that. I like it. I like it. It is dope. Thanks, dude.
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#568 - Danny McBride
Yeah, what was something else that I was thinking about? Because I'll never see you again, but I was just trying to think of what it is.
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#568 - Danny McBride
No, it would be awesome if we did. I feel like we might. Do you get impressed by a lot of the stuff that you see out there? Do you get inspired? You'll see a movie. You'll see something. It makes you want to keep making more. Do you think you'll take a little bit of a break? What do you kind of think? Or you already have something you're making next?
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#568 - Danny McBride
Yeah, I get definitely caught up. Like I have to do this or this. But then sometimes I do start to notice a little bit more like I want to chill out because I want to give my brain time to think so it's fun for me. Yeah, so it can heal.
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#568 - Danny McBride
Yeah. That used to be the most fun doing your brain gives you an idea and it just makes you laugh. You're by yourself or whatever. Yeah. And then you got to share it. Um, what about your son?
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#568 - Danny McBride
Huh. Yeah, that's interesting. I've never heard anybody even talk about that except for this girl, Mubi, that works with Barstool Sports. She played lacrosse. So I would see her. Oh, one of my friends from New York would talk about it sometimes. Yeah, I didn't know anything about it at all.
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#568 - Danny McBride
God, that's beautiful. God, you got to stop and drink that. Is it interesting whenever you see your kid, like say you take him to lacrosse and he likes it, is it interesting that you learn something about him by watching him start to like something?
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#568 - Danny McBride
Well, I've never – oh, Ryan Trahan. Trahan, that's what it is. I've never even heard of this. And it's crazy. This has – so this video has 60 million views, right? Like it's crazy how much is out there that you've never even heard of and you'll be exposed. You'll be like, oh, this is amazing. Yeah, it's really cool. Wow. I'd like to meet this kid.
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#568 - Danny McBride
chased the dudes down it was like oh this is some real shit right here yeah bro god that's cool yeah because i wonder if you did like like if you're dead i guess he doesn't bring work home because that would be like having an inmate come over for dinner i think if he brings work home there's a big problem yeah i um we grew up by this it was like a prosthetic kind of Not factory, I guess.
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#568 - Danny McBride
There's a guy – there's these kids, Colby and Sam, that are like these ghost hunter kids I want to get to meet. It's – I was never brave enough to vlog. We just had some streamers in, and that lifestyle is insane, man. Eight hours in a row. It's wild, huh? Dude, Dan, think about that. Eight hours, right? And you have to be yourself, so you can't really hide who you are at all.
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#568 - Danny McBride
And then you have to go home and then come back and – And do it all over again.
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#568 - Danny McBride
Yeah. You know? Yeah, that's a good point. I guess they're just not doing it maybe together as much, but maybe they are. I don't know. This could be a phase in time. I mean, we would go play at the church parking lot, dude. Anybody that would answer the door on the way down the street, it was three or four blocks to get down there. If you answered the fucking door, you were playing defense, right?
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#568 - Danny McBride
Yeah. So we would knock on the doors about 3.40 in the afternoon, walk down there, and there was a hole. Somebody, I don't know who put it out there, like the devil or whatever, but in the field, they had a field in front of the church off of Highway 190 over there in Covington. And sometimes every two years, somebody would step into the hole and break their leg or ankle. Perfect.
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#568 - Danny McBride
That's what it was there for. That's it, dude. That's a fucking free safety, bitch. That's what that is.
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#568 - Danny McBride
though but yeah if you answer the door you had to come play man and we would get on our bikes and we would ride they had like a ride probably about a mile and a half over this place called pat's shrimp and video right oh i like that you get a bag of shrimp right it wasn't all you could eat but it was like all they could put in the bag and you would get to rent a movie dude i love that god dude terminator we get a store don't you i miss that stuff that was fun
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#568 - Danny McBride
There was nothing. Dude, I went to the last Blockbuster in Oregon probably two years ago. And these are the things I found fascinating about it. For one, you're not just stuck with what the platform, like the app or whatever we look on it now, Netflix, et cetera, is putting in front of you, like those 10 or 12 movies at a time.
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#568 - Danny McBride
You get to kind of consciously wander and you're like, oh, I forgot about this movie, right? Yeah, yeah. Oh, what? No way. He was in that. They did a movie together. You see all of these fronts of movies. You'll see 300 of them while you're in there, and you'll be like, drama, I'll do with that. Different ones, like diabetes is a section.
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#568 - Danny McBride
Some of the sections have gotten a little bit more casual than before.
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#568 - Danny McBride
I'm going to get me a good diabetes movie this weekend. This is what I want to watch. Yeah, I want to see these lactose intolerant films or whatever. But it's a totally different experience. It's in Bend, Oregon, which is a great place. Only about four or five nice months out of the year at all, though, to be honest with you. A lot of bad stuff.
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#568 - Danny McBride
But your brain would be like, oh, what do you – and you'd talk with your friend. What do you think about this? You would kind of discuss it. It just like – it was much more – it was so much different than, oh, I'm just going to pick one off of here. It didn't even feel the same.
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#568 - Danny McBride
That's a great point. Yeah, that kind of stuff doesn't exist. I just watched Interstellar the other day. That was cool. But, yeah, that genre doesn't exist, man. Garbage Pail Kids Cards, we'd ride and get those bitches. Yeah, that stuff was good. That's good living. Oh, you'd get your ass beat. You'd just sit there watching Highway to Heaven. That's us, dude. We got this.
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#568 - Danny McBride
I think it was hoping that, like, after the war, like, prostheticking would scale up or whatever. But so – but it never really did. But they had a lot of – they give us, like, the used – like, the fucking – you can get them out back. Sometimes the used ones, the ones that didn't. Used prosthetics, ones that people didn't want? Yeah, returns or ones that were – they did to – they didn't –
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#568 - Danny McBride
Yeah, dude, look at that. Look at that. I look like I've obviously done some cocaine, and you look like... Yeah, that looks like me, unfortunately. Yeah, that looks like you.
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#568 - Danny McBride
Got a little too deep into it. You'll be the Wilford Brimley, dude. That's right. Dude, my dad bought this car off like some kind of blackish, you know, kind of black guys that live by us. And it was like some guys that were in the culture with the big speakers in the car. And at that time, it was white and black guys that had speakers in the trunk.
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#568 - Danny McBride
But he bought a Cutlass off of him and he would listen to like Paul Harvey and shit like in his car. And it would just blast this bass in there.
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#568 - Danny McBride
Fucking unreal, dude. That was so much fun, man. Being alive has been fun, huh? Yeah. Not too bad. We'll see. It's been an adventure. Do you like parenting? Is it something that you really enjoy doing? Do you kind of like – was that something that you – what is something surprising that you found about parenting? And then we'll get you out of here.
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#568 - Danny McBride
Does it hurt a little bit? You can't really express that to him because that's kind of weird, huh?
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#568 - Danny McBride
Yeah. Yeah. Have you ever wanted to pull off like a heist or something? That's my last question for you. Yeah, of course.
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#568 - Danny McBride
If you were to do a bank robbery, you had to go in there with a couple of guys. Who do you bring in there with you, Danny?
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#568 - Danny McBride
It's not like veneers, but they just didn't do the edging right on it or something, or the hand was too small for the guy who ordered it. The pinky was too sharp. Yeah, yeah. Like, oh, yeah. I can't even hug my wife with this. But we would – yeah, you'd have people like – or it would be two middle fingers. Some, you know, guar fan would get like one with two middle fingers on it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#568 - Danny McBride
Well, he was a spad. There was a rumor that he had lived in Bogalusa, Louisiana. So he was always like one of these like rumored people that lived in the distance, you know. So there was always a strong love for John Goodman from Louisiana area. Yeah, he's a really –
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#568 - Danny McBride
Awesome. What makes him so great? I mean obviously he's a generational talent. He's a father – he's been a father to half of America over time.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#568 - Danny McBride
Good point. Just like with your favorite sports players.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#568 - Danny McBride
Yeah. Yeah, Carol O'Connor is buried not far from my apartment in Westwood. Oh, wow. And I'll take people over there a lot of times if they're visiting in town or whatever. And he's definitely one of my favorites because of In the Heat of the Night. Oh, yeah. God, that show was so good.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#568 - Danny McBride
Yeah, I just love – I love like kind of southern kind of – I just – yeah, I love those things, man. Those are some of my favorites for sure. But what was I going to – who was I – oh, Carol O'Connor. Who else is buried there? Marilyn Monroe. Boom. Same cemetery. In the same coffin I hear. That's good. I heard she's working nights. They doubled them up. Errol Flynn.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#568 - Danny McBride
I'm just going to keep advertising this place. Errol Flynn. Oh, Hugh Hefner is buried there also. Walter Matthau. Wow.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#568 - Danny McBride
No, it's in fucking Westwood, dude. You wouldn't even know it. It's behind a building. You're like, what the fuck? It's like behind a neck-tail building. There's no other like blocks of grass anywhere near it. It's just like big buildings, tall, huge buildings. And then there's this one little bitty – it's a – it's fucking – 40 square yards. Wow, that's that. Got some kings in that bitch.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#568 - Danny McBride
But that was something that was always funny around us because you'd see – like people would chase each other with different little appendages. You'd see fucking somebody – You know, not hit their wife but throw a hand at her, you know, or something.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#568 - Danny McBride
A lot of Persians in there, too. A lot of names you can't really pronounce, but that's it right there, dude. Beautiful. Walter Matthaus in that bitch, dude.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#568 - Danny McBride
Or go by their apartment, if you got to go by the apartment that Walter Matthau lived in. Yeah, I think it would mean something to people. It really would. That's a good point. I never thought about that. Yeah, because you'll go, like, we'll preserve some places. Like, Charleston preserves their history.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#568 - Danny McBride
I like a lot of, like... But, yeah, Hollywood just kind of... Hollywood's never had much of a memory, kind of, I feel like. It just... Well, and it's the thing.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#568 - Danny McBride
You're right, Danny. Take that. Take that. Season four of Righteous Gemstones. Adam Devine is coming in too to talk to us. Oh, good. I know. He's just going to sit here and lie his ass off. That's all he does. Yeah. He also – he complains that he like – He said he was getting that shin thing where he gets elongated or whatever. Yeah, yeah. He's made up a lot of stuff.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#568 - Danny McBride
Yeah, it's weird when a set ends, when the shoot ends. It's just like – it's like the last day of school. Yeah. Everybody's saying goodbye to everybody. You're getting all these photos, and then the next day or two, you're just sitting –
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#568 - Danny McBride
That's good. It was fun. It just made things fun. Or you see, like, somebody try to break into a car but not using their own fingerprints. Like, try to – It's brilliant. Yeah, just type shit like that. Commit crimes. I like it. Yeah, it's just it was a different time. But, yeah, I miss that a lot. I bet you have influence.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#568 - Danny McBride
Danny, everybody, thanks so much for all the entertainment, dude, all the inspiration. And, yeah, I just really appreciate your time, man. I hope you continue to make fun stuff. I'm sure you will. And congrats on getting to spend time with your kids. Thank you, man. I hope you put that dick laser to good use, okay? Don't you fucking worry. Don't you fucking worry.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#568 - Danny McBride
I'm putting this on some fucking bitches back at the UFC fight this weekend. Thank you so much, man. Thank you, buddy. You bet. Thanks for this gift. Yeah, very nice. You're going to use it. I can already tell.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#568 - Danny McBride
Yeah, that's a good point. I bet somebody could send them your way.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#568 - Danny McBride
They need that, though, dude, especially with just how things are going these days. It's like I think you almost want two middles.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#568 - Danny McBride
We don't have enough. Do you – since you live over there in Charleston, do you stay out of like – I know that you don't have social media and stuff like that. You just keep all that stuff out of your life? I really do.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#568 - Danny McBride
to be a guest on this show. I'm grateful to spend time with Mr. Danny McBride.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#568 - Danny McBride
Yeah, but it's just good that you, like, recognize that. Yeah, it's kind of addicting, and it makes you feel bad, I think, sometimes. Some things are nice to see because it feels inspirational, but then sometimes you're just like, yeah, you're keeping up with this kind of weird void, it feels like.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#568 - Danny McBride
Oh yeah. They have everything. You even have gauze on there now. So it's fucking, it's upscaled. It's upscaled a lot. Um, do you miss like, like being, when I, when I was a kid, like things were dumb, like shit was just, you could be funny all day. Who you didn't give a shit. Like somebody had noodles or something. You got home. Like there was just shit was possible. Right.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#568 - Danny McBride
Somebody had noodles when you got home? Or it was just like everything was going to kind of be okay. Do you miss like – but I notice as I get older, just my brain doesn't even come up with like some of the ideas and stuff that I had when I was a kid and like – Like do you notice any of that for yourself like that you felt like your humor was different than or that humor changes as you get older?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#568 - Danny McBride
Yeah, that's a good call, man. Yeah, it's like – yeah, because maybe sometimes I think I miss. That is what I miss. I almost miss feeling – I know this sounds weird. I almost miss feeling dumb a little bit. Yeah, not knowing about everything that's going on in the world.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#568 - Danny McBride
And not wearing all these things on my face that aren't even of my own life kind of in a way, you know. Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#568 - Danny McBride
And I had this weird thought about the other day, like, say if like you're a parent and you're always seeing like these cute things that kids do on TikToks and different things, I wonder if it affects the way a little bit, like if your kid isn't as boisterous or isn't, like, does it like... I don't know. Like just I don't know.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#568 - Danny McBride
I thought about like it takes almost all of like some of our good like our good reactions or the things that are kind of supposed to be reserved for kind of real people in our lives. Does it start to like take those reactions to those people? Does it make any sense?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#568 - Danny McBride
Fuck, that's brave of you though. You're almost like damn Christopher Columbus. I feel like you just don't see a lot of it. It's cool, man.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#568 - Danny McBride
Is that what you do? Is that what you spend your time?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#568 - Danny McBride
Yeah, dude, I had a roommate over there. We would drink so much gin and tonics and just wet the bed all the time over there. A lot of bedwetters in Charleston. Beautiful. People were like, I'm on the sailing team. It was like, sure you are, brother. You better fucking put a catamaran between you and your wife, dude. Oh, you know who I saw yesterday speaking on social media? The Rizzler.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#568 - Danny McBride
You ever seen this kid? Oh, I've seen the Rizzler, yeah. Dude, I met him in person. Yes. I'm having dinner, right? I was having dinner. I look over, and it's a kid. And you don't want to look for too long because it's just not something you do. And look at him. Look at him, dude. Oh, and you got a pic with him, too. I love it, man. Bro, I was so excited.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#568 - Danny McBride
But it's kind of weird because you don't want to be like, I'm talking to a kid or whatever. But definitely, dude, I'll say this. Wait, where were you guys at? Is that Craig's? I went to Craig's dinner. The Rizzler's just hanging out at Craig's. Oh, it blew my mind. There was like some guy in there who like had like overdosed on age or something like some super old guy.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#568 - Danny McBride
He's like, I'm a producer, you know. He's like, I produced the Mayflower or whatever. I was like, that was a fucking boat. That was a boat in the 1800s. But yeah, anyway, this was like the coolest thing that ever happened. So I was so excited. And not to snitch on him or whatever. First of all, he had two Pepsis or whatever past 8 p.m., which I think he is. Yeah, that's late.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#568 - Danny McBride
He's going to – the bedtime stories won't work anymore. They'll be up all night. Yep. Yep. Yeah, that's a little late. And some people say his grades have been suffering. And I'm like, well.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#568 - Danny McBride
Oh, that's cool. Yeah. Yeah, it was definitely nice. I mean, it was just neat to see him. It was interesting to be impressed by a child, but he's kind of like the Macaulay Culkin of like their generation. It seems like, you know, I mean, maybe that's a reach, but, but yeah, he was fucking eating at Craig's with some, it just like, it was very bizarre.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#568 - Danny McBride
And I asked him a question and he just started doing his arms like that. Did he do his little move to you? Did he give it to you or no? I don't think I got it. I think he – I mean I'm an adult and I shouldn't have really been talking to him. So I think I was a little – and the weird thing is you see all these adults looking at him. It's just got to be so weird to be him. It does.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#568 - Danny McBride
That's actually not a bad idea. If the whole interview were scripted, man, that'd be freaking pretty amazing, man. Good to see you today. No, I got this. There's a place called Macho Luther King that I went to, and I was like, this is... It just like, is that a, like, are we at that level where you're taking a guy like that and turning it into like a pun? Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#568 - Danny McBride
It's like he's this generation's Shirley Temple. Yeah, he really is. Yeah, he's an Italian Shirley Temple. But he definitely looks like – yeah, I just heard his grades have been suffering. And I even was like the dad. I was like somebody said he's had issues in social studies and he looked at his dad like – You've been telling people. Yeah, why are you talking about my grades?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#568 - Danny McBride
That was kind of interesting. My friend and I made a movie. David Spade and I wrote a movie. Thank you for inspiring people to just kind of create stuff on their own.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#568 - Danny McBride
Oh, he was the he was the best. Maybe him and Chris Elliott were like the best people that came in. Man, that's great. Yeah. Steve Little is such a he's such a good dude. He's so incredibly funny. Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Yeah, a lot of people thought that that's Matt Rife. Brian Johnson.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Well, especially because Hooters just went bankrupt, which is crazy. Damn. He was keeping it in business, dude. I bet. I bet. Yeah, that guy could house some wings. Bro, and he would walk in. It would always be empty. Restaurant chain Hooters goes bust and files for bankruptcy protection. What is this, the Asian version?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
And there is a – if you can't see on the YouTube on the video right now, there is a picture of all Asian women in Hooters attire. Where is that photo taken? Can you give me some information? Can you scroll up or down or something? There you go. Chinese waitresses dressed in orange shorts and t-shirts cheer while welcoming the arriving guests at the Hooters restaurant in Beijing.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Yeah, my stepdad is sick, so I got to go see him. I know, I'm bummed. I wanted to be there for Kill Tony.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Yeah, let's just say that they got probably so many articles saying that they couldn't hire good tits in there anymore.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Yeah, you got to get – An actual owl in there? Sure. It's like, what are we doing?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Yeah, that's like the Utah tits. Those tits are clean over there.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
What do I do here? A lot of them are like, I'm a model. And it's like, what are you? Will you model those sodas over here for me? Like, not in a bad way. But it's like, look, I want to support your modeling. I will tip a little bit extra. Sure. But we want to eat, too. I don't want to.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Right. Are you just a waitress? Are you – It was a gray area. If I have you sign my 11-year-old son's back with a Sharpie, am I a fucking sick dad or whatever?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Right. Hooters was this vague thing. We're like, hey, while you're a pervert, order like. Right. Let's get some fucking protein in you.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Yeah, and she's been losing her hair because she has, like, iron deficiency or something.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Oh, that'll get you. That was my black ex. Yeah, dude, Hooters is shutting down. John Daly is going to have nowhere. Because, you know, he used to live in a Hooters. He lived in a... I can see that. Didn't John Daly live in a Hooters? Bring that up. No way. I thought you were joking. That's amazing.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
John Gruden had an office apparently at Hooters headquarters, and John Daly had a special sleeping room in there. Shut the fuck up. Where'd they hear that? Oh, on the most recent episode of Theo Vaughn's This Past Weekend podcast. So hold on. You're your own reference. Hey, dude, this is where we are, dude.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
I saw John Daly overdose on gym one night and had to get carried out of a restaurant, not even a bar.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Oh, yeah. Dude, he's definitely him. Kid Rock. Now we have a superhero. Yep. We have our Avengers, dude. Yes. We need some more in there. We need a good woman in there.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
I didn't know. Oh yeah, dude. He has a dog that can say the N word I saw.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Oh, I know who. That lady that cooks and that said the N-word. What's her name?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Yes. And a keeper on her toes. Yeah. Right. Right. Who do we get in there?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
But now it's their Klan hood. So it's like, what do we what do whites do now that there's I don't want to say this is cultural appropriation.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Yeah. Oh, it's so hard these days to figure out if you're a Nazi or not. It is fucking impossible.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
But then you also have people saying that America and Israel are swastika. They're using it, promoting them because they're killing the Palestinians. So you're saying that they're the fat. Like, you know what I'm saying? It's like you guys are the new Germany. They're saying that Israel is the new Germany.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Yeah. It's like what happened to a fucking the business transaction of a glory hole, dude?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
It's all twisted. But at the same time, is it the most exciting? It's exciting.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Hopefully it's not a German shepherd. He thought a black lab was a place where they tested barbecue sauce. I was like, here, get on the mic.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Oh, race riot. Black kids beat up another white kid at school. Not a hate crime. Right.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
It's like 10 reasons why apples are killing your body right now. Yes. And you're like, fuck.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
I was like, Bob, you got the wrong idea, man. So you're doing Kill Tony coming up? Tonight, yeah. Tonight.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Dude, that's a great point. Yeah, it's definitely become crazy now. Yeah. It's like – But it's because people are afraid to speak up because I think all those people feel like they'll probably lose their jobs. I think a lot of them are just caught in this old system where like if I say anything that's truthful, that's why I think why a lot of like – you even see like Candace Owens.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
You see a lot of comedians, podcasters. Like people are listening to them. At least they – They're trying to figure shit out or they're talking about things as earnestly as they think they can.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Yeah. It's gross. It's a great point he said. It's passing the buck. Where's the fucking – how was it that like even during the first year of like the Gaza thing that not one mainstream network guy was like, hey, this seems kind of fucked up?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
But it was kind of like, hey, this – or even just any side like let's get one interview from a Palestinian guy. Oh, yeah, yeah, true. That shit was just kind of crazy. Hey, basketball fans, are you ready to win real money? Well, check out Pick 6 from DraftKings. When it comes to basketball payouts, DraftKings Pick 6 dunks on its rivals, including prize picks. Just select two or more players.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Yeah, I know, huh? Have you done one on that big of a level?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
UFC 314 is on the way. It's a stacked pay-per-view card taking place live from Miami, Florida. In the main event, Alexander Volkanovski returns to face top contender Diego Lopez for the vacant featherweight championship. That's going to be a banger. Michael Chandler also takes on Paddy the Baddie Pimblett in a five-round co-main event. Also on the card, Yair Rodriguez welcomes Patricio Pitbull.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
To the UFC and the fighting nerds look to continue their UFC unbeaten streaks. You can buy now at ESPNPLUS.com slash T-H-E-O or click the link in the description below. That's UFC 314. It's this Saturday at 10 p.m. Eastern time only on ESPN Plus pay-per-view. You can guarantee I will be getting it. You can buy now at ESPNPLUS.com slash T-H-E-O or click the link in the description below.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Dude, and imagine them getting up there, that many people. They're going to be shook.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Pitbull coming over from Bellator. Yair Rodriguez, one of the greats. You got Volkanovski vs. Lopez. It's gonna be a banger. You have a new show that you're doing?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
And, like, in between. Oh, that's an example of it right there?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
What else do you do here? You break down the bit with other friends, kind of work on it?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Yeah, I've been in there. That lab over there, it's great.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
So the show is going to be, it's just different examples of that.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Yeah, I want to start working on some new stuff, man. I've been writing a lot of stuff. I just have to start getting on stage. I think I'll go down to Austin probably to work on it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Well, just to have this, and also there's other rooms right around there. Brian Redman has a room right there. Yeah, the Creek. Yeah, they have one room there. It's called like Skinny F***ed or whatever, you know what it's called. But it's like they have a— Is that Tony's room? Yeah. We did it. Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
But they have a lot of like – yeah, it's like Autistic Cat or whatever.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Yeah, they have everything there like save the – like, dude, things there are so progressive but also way – it's like – I've seen like save the N words there. And you're like, that does not seem.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Like it's like racist and progressive because it's like Austin.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
I agree. And it's even a lot of times when you're working on new stuff, for me, it's like that third time you do it in a night, even if you don't even want to do it. And nothing comes out of it, but it's still just burning that, like, every time you cook it, you just cook it. And it's like, so the next time will be good, right? 100%.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Yeah. Yeah, dude, I have a buddy that just started comedy last week. No way. A friend of mine from AA just started comedy.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
I remember walking by some of the Saints players, and they all said, we're going to steal your girlfriend. That sounds about right. That's what they do. And they did. That's the crazy part. No, I don't know. But yeah, dude. God, bro, when we went to Lucy's, that was fun, dude.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
She seemed like a beautiful young lady, huh? Very attractive. She just got separated from her husband, I think. Oh, hey, you're in. That's slurp-lord. I thought about sending her a message, but I don't know what I would say.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
No one talks to her like that anymore, so they'll probably turn her on. You think, oh, I'll definitely say something about that vegetation. Yeah, she's got some crop circles. Oh, yeah, brother. Is that the X?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Whether you're going solo or teaming up with your squad, it's time to come home to Verdansk. Download Call of Duty Warzone for free and dive into the action today. Rated M for Mature. I want to let you know we have these new hoodies, the Onward hoodies in the merch shop. These are my favorite template of hoodie ever that we've ever had. I think you will love them and enjoy them.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Yeah, dude, it would take you 70 minutes to get her bra on, I think.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Thank you. Thank you. . . . . .. a, ac, men P P P P P G實 , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . a Laboratory the
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Oh, you would have to have a buddy. You would almost have to be like two of those guys doing that slingshot thing or whatever.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Fuck yeah, that's a great point, dude. Yeah, she could be anything. We need flight attendants like this now.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
That both weigh 32 ounces. The sledgehammer's weight is almost all at the end, whereas the broomstick is distributed evenly. Damn. Which is easier to swing fast. The broomstick, of course. So they're saying that it's slower to swing the new one.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Oh, they're all gay. Even a woman like you're – I remember trying to hit on this lady, and she'll be like – she's like, I'd love to go out with you, but I'm only going to be a woman for like another week. And I was like, what the fuck, man?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
By shedding some of the weight off the end of the torpedo bat and moving it towards the middle, hitters have found it swings very similarly to a traditional model, but with... Slightly faster bat velocity. Hmm. Huh.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
God, I know, huh? Damn, that's interesting. I wonder what other loopholes have I noticed. What other things? Well, there was a part where they allegedly deflated the ball some. Yeah, yeah, with the Patriots. What else has kind of happened over the years? Hmm. A lot of steroids. Yeah, steroids are so big.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
He's got like ball skin on his forearms. Dude, can you believe that women used to not even be able to talk that much? Isn't that crazy? Those were the days. But can you even imagine that? Like you're at dinner and a guy comes up to talk and you talk to him and your wife tries to say something. You're like, honey. Exactly. Let us do business here.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
That's got to suck. You imagine the resentment built up in a lot of those women. Oh, of course. That's why a lot of third generation women are squirters, I think, because it's all that resentment built up.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Yeah, it's a streamline, brother. Yeah. That is a damn, damn, huh? You ever got a squirt from a lady? I mean, I, oh, I knew a gal that could, oh. Super soak? No, but she was just articulate. Oh, damn. Like she could. Oh, she could fucking autograph a curtain. I knew a girl definitely that could fucking wash your cat's eyes before you could blink them.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
That's what this flight attendant said. I was like, oh, come on.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Oh, dude, and there's a couple young sisters double dutching in it. That's the craziest part, dude.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Bro, yeah, you get somebody that's a real galosh or you'd have to fucking... Somebody's like, damn, are you from Maine or something?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
It was crazy. Oh, you'd have to use that stuff that you would use on your car. It was like Rain-X. Remember that? Oh, yeah. Dude, when Rain-X came out, we got high. Because we'd seen commercials that would make the rain bead off your window. Yes, exactly. So we'd Rain-X our cars, get stoned, drive in the rain, and watch it bead off. We'd be like, no. Oh, that's a good time.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Those are the good times, dude. Yeah. You know, life's better with a good hack, like learning the secret menu at your favorite restaurant or stumbling upon a buy one, get one sale at the mall. Well, there's a wireless hack, too, and it's called Visible. Visible's like ordering from the secret menu in wireless. You get unlimited data and hotspot. And plans start at just $25 a month for one line.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Plans start at $25 a month. For our best features, get the new Visible Plus Pro plan for $45 a month. Terms apply. See visible.com for plan features and network management details. You want to be ready when somebody knocks on your wiener door to answer. That's what I'm talking about, baby. Blue Chew.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
It is. Dude, I feel like when you get on, you have to protect your straightness. The second you get on there, I lock in, dude. I tell my penis, I say, you know what we're here for. We're just here to get from A to B. Right.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
We've all been there where you sign up for something and then you forget about it after the trial period ends and then you're charged. I was getting charged for a dang umbrella deal I got in. I keep getting these umbrellas in the mail and I'm just damn, I don't know, just soaked in extra payments is really what I'm soaked in. It happens to everyone. You're charged month after month.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Yeah, what was I thinking about, dude? You want kids? Yeah, I got to get a kid, man.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Thanks, dude. I appreciate it. I think, yeah, I got to change a little bit of some of my patterns, kind of. Well, we all have some fucked up tendencies and all that. But did you have like how did you change your tendencies to meet to meet a woman? And I know you have a child now, but how did you change your tendencies? Because you were kind of like a rost about man.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
They're going to tempt you. It'll be like a kind of a guy, you know, like a guy possibly dressed as a woman walking through with liquor or snacks or those goldfish. My penis loves goldfish.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
And he's the truth. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. The average age of new fathers in the United States has risen to 30.9 years, a significant increase from 27.4 years in 1972. Wow. Actually, I thought it would be higher. So it's going up. So it's almost 31 years right now. Yeah, I live in New York.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Oh, he definitely looks like the last matador. Yeah. Look at that stache and the hair. He looks like definitely the guy that'll turn a triple play at a glory hole, you know? Yeah, he looks like a French villain. Oh, yeah, he does, dude. Oh, he's always definitely had that very, like, America's favorite spice trader guy. Right, right. Like, he sells knives in Bangladesh.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Yeah, he definitely looks like a guy that'll sell you a secret. Yes. For sure. Definitely. He's a unique guy. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. He's a very unique guy, dude. His new special, I think, is the best-looking comedy special I've seen.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
You have a child now, man. Yeah, it's crazy. That's insane to see you right now and be talking to you for the past 40 minutes and then realize this guy has a huge...
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Wow, your wife looks great even post-birth right there.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Being as cynical as comedians are, right, what does cynical mean?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
But do not look over there. You stay straight. We're going to Cincinnati.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
I think it, well, I noticed for myself, it's hard for me. Sometimes there used to be for sure. And when like something was really real, like a real moment, it was hard for me to like experience it as a real moment.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
So it feels really real. So it's like super real feelings.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
does it create a new relationship with your wife? Like, is there now some, like, cause I've heard Schultz say that like, you know, you now, like he would have times where he would call his wife to check on the baby and not be checking on her kind of. And so like he said, just there were little dynamics like that, that he started to notice where, um,
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
does it make like a new relationship with you and your wife? Does things still seem the same? Does it, or everything's just normal? Like any thoughts on any of that?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
And is it hard? How long do you have to wait before you can be sexually active with your spouse?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
It's like leaving Tower 1 and going into Tower 2. Yeah, and it says gas above the door. And you go in there and fucking blaze up a smoke.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
You're right. Do you think you did that? Was it territorial or were you just partying?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
It's nice that these kids can swim. Oh, that is nice, man. I worry about that. Someone had a baby out of their butt, too. Did you see that?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Bring that up. An ass baby? That's tough. Well... That's some good sperm. These days, it's the only way to get into this country, it feels like. Anal birth. Let's look at them. That's on Apple. Whoa, whoa, buddy.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Yeah. Well, because it's replacing the old thing. It's like you still want the affection. Right. And now it's like a lot of us didn't even have dads. So it's like they're kind of coming at you with that combo meal.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
That was wild. There's no article. There is. There was something on there. Oh, there are? They'll come around. Somebody will write the article. Yeah. Is that real? Huh?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
It has to have had happened. Wow. I guess it just came out the wrong shoot, you know? Yeah, the baby, a lot of them are working backwards. It's like, yeah, have you ever seen those pictures of those guys that get stuck in those tunnels like in fucking... Jews?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
What has – speaking of that, has there been like a lot of turmoil in – do you see a lot of turmoil in New York City?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Yeah, and one of the food trucks went missing too, ironically, the same day.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Oh, dude. Yeah, dude. Shawarma's my heart. Oh, shawarma's my heart. How is that not a shirt? Or I'm sure it's the name of a food truck. It's got to be. Yeah. What do we know about foreign college students targeted for deportation? Yeah. Which one did they have? The Trump administration has set off a legal and ethical firestorm by targeting international students at U.S.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
colleges for deportation, including some whom the government alleges participated in pro-Palestinian protests or activities on campus.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Yeah, well, I think you have to – I think you have to be able to separate that. That's a good point.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Yeah, that's a good point, man. Well, because I think that they've, from what I've learned, they've been, like, had a tough time finding a territory to live in, right?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
And the female flirty. Yeah, that's good. You get it in one. That's God. I'd love to be gay. That's a lot of gay guys thing is don't you want that combo meal?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Like, historically, that they've had a tough time finding a place to live in. I think what just hasn't helped...
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
has been the shit in gaza it's like of course i think it's just made like um and then there's a lot of i think people start looking then at like ownership and oppressors right and i think you have a lot of jewish people that are super successful they're good at being successful the best on the weather the best right got it all and so then i think it doesn't that makes things like
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
I think that's where people take one – go from one thing and bridge to another.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
It's true. There's a lot of layers. It's hard to figure a lot of it out. Oh, yeah. Mahmoud Khalil, I think that's who you're talking about. A 30-year-old Columbia University international affairs graduate student of Palestinian descent was arrested on March 8th when ICE agents appeared at his student apartment building. Can you even imagine that?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
I would think it was like one of those fraternity things they do in the morning or whatever.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Yeah, it was like Sigma Alpha genocide or whatever, and they're fucking taking you outside to tickle you until you fucking piss gin or whatever. Khalil is married to an American citizen who's pregnant with their first child.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
The Trump administration accused Khalil, a Palestinian activist, of supporting Hamas and distributing pro-Hamas propaganda, though it has provided no evidence to support this claim. Wow.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
It's a tough time. Because then you also wonder like what, like if there's Israeli influence, because that's a big thing now, like how much Israeli influence is there in like American politics, you know? Oh, there's a lot. And it seems to be a ton. I feel like America is just like, it feels like we're just owned by Israel, you know? And we just never knew it. I thought we owned them.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
That's what I thought. Uh-oh. But here's the thing. If we're just a team, then just tell us we're a fucking team.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Yeah, dude. Everything's fucking sliding right over that little hair wallet. Yeah, right? But, dude, that's the thing I think that would help everybody if they would just say, hey, this is what's fucking really going on. Yes. So – because otherwise I think you're just – there's still this ruse of pretending that people aren't going to maybe figure it out.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Oh, dude, can you? This is insane to be talking about.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Or if you let people start to figure out themselves, then a lot of times people go to the worst place in their minds, right?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Give us three out of eight. Yeah, that's not bad. Is it nine? I think it's eight. Yeah. Give that a check, but I think it's eight. But I agree, dude. And also, like, How to be supportive of your Jewish friends.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
This is God's country. I'm just going to Cincinnati, okay? That's all. You're right. That's all I'm telling you, Mark. All right.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Oh, definitely, dude. He's a bad boy. He is, huh? Yeah. Yeah. Mahmoud Khalil speaks to members of media about the revolt for Rafah encampment at Columbia University. Dude, I think – but also, dude, the shit that's going on over there is so horrific. Here's what I think has happened in Gaza recently, right? I think they are testing –
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
A lot of, like, the technology and things that they've—weapons and stuff. I think they're testing it on that place.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Well, I'm just— I think maybe I got caught in a fucking Twitter hole the other night.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
I had to call Sean Ryan and tell him, like, dude, everything's okay, right? I fucking—
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Don't absorb it too much. Yeah, let's get off. We'll get off of it. I mean, I don't know enough about it. I don't either. But sometimes it's just heartbreaking.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Or is there something that we don't know? Then just tell us that shit.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
I agree. That's the thing. It's like, just tell us what is fucking going on. Yes. You know, does that make sense to you, too? Or do I sound crazy saying that?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
But, dude, yeah, there's just something like they – yeah, you see them and they – but, yeah, God, could you even imagine some strong guy who was probably like on the neck team in college or whatever, some sporting event like the – Wrestling? Yeah, wrestling or something like that. Oh, yeah. And he just pins your cock to the back of his throat with his tongue or whatever.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Yeah, is it fucking Papa John delivering N-words to people?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
That's a good question. First of all, why don't they have more black-specific businesses, dude?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
No, but still, that's close enough, right? Yeah. It's like, why is there not more? What's the top black-owned pizza company? And I believe this about a lot of things. Like, where are the fucking black-owned businesses?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Slim and Huskies, that's in, I think that's here. Yes, that's in Tennessee. Oh, there we go. Dude, I met the owner. Bring the owner up. I met him one time over at Fenwick's here in town. Nice. Dude, you saved my day today, man.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Go to Slim and Huskies. Get that fucking father figure omelet. No, but go to Slim and Huskies. There they are. They're the dogs right there. Who are they? Oh, there they are right there. Clint Gray, Derek Moore, and Emmanuel Reed, baby. Hell yeah. Hell yeah, dude. Get the fucking big dog special over there. The founding, the trio, who are also Tennessee State alumni, Tennessee State University.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Shout out TSU, where my buddy Zeta played kicker over there, was the only white kid over there. Oh, yeah. Kickers are how we slide in. Oh, yeah, dude.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Check it out. Dude, this is one thing I think that a lot of cultures and ethnicities can learn from Jewish culture is how to, like, support your culture, right? Yeah. Like— There he is. We should do that. I think other groups should do it. I think – and other cultures may do it better than like Christians and Muslims.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
But Jewish people do it well. They support their friends. They support their creations and the things that their friends make. Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
But they do a lot of stuff like invest in their children, their children, like, you know, like learning, education. I think a lot can be learned from that culture, man. Is that crazy to say that?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
The last inch, they call it. Dude, yeah, let's talk about something else that's more fun, man.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
No, no. I mean, I'm interested. But I think I was just curious what it's like in New York City because, you know.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Well, it's kind of crazy that two years ago you couldn't even say the word Israel. It felt like on a podcast. You could always say Jews are great or whatever.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Yeah. You know, it's just a honk. It's like a very successful honky.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Yeah, that is. He's working for someone. Yeah. Yeah. His show's coming back. That's right. Are you going to be able to do an episode of it? I am. I'm working on a story now. I got to work on one, dude. He asked. I just fucking, it's been hard.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
I don't know if I can get it right now. Yeah. I don't know if I can get it ready. But I think I got to do this podcast coming up. Well, your last one was killer with the cabbie and the cocaine. That was like my first story. That was like that was like when I started talking about like being sober and shit like that.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
That story was crazy. I remember one part of it, this girl like laying in my lap and like we're just like both like we're both had been drinking or whatever. And I'm trying to like lean down and kiss her. And I couldn't get to her face, you know. Oh, yeah? Oh, yeah. And you get so close, and you're right there, and she's fucking, you know. It's like trying to blow yourself. You get so close.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
It's right there. God, that's a fucking Adam's apple stops you.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Oh, that's the worst when a guy's getting a tort all shot. Because he's been fucking tongue-washing his own kick. Yeah, I got to do yoga or something. Oh, dude, yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
I think I've felt for a while that things are turning into the WWE, that nobody's like super famous anymore. Things are merging pretty quick. It's like you have people who are coming up with like a crazy lyric on TikTok that are now selling out big music venues that bands who have been performing for 15 years can't sell out, right? So it's like I think everything's just getting weird.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
It's like you could have – like, you know, a year and a half ago, sketch the what's up brother. That guy was probably for two months was the most popular guy in the world. Maybe totally like everything's just, it's very strange now.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Right. It used to be like you and I would never talk to Harrison Ford. No. Or get to or like Kendall Jenner. You know, it's like but now we have a chance to at least look at them as they drive by.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
I didn't ask to edit the thing or anything. Totally fucking normal. Cool dude. Regular guy.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
And it seems like they're honestly like, kind of like in lovebirds. Like when I saw them, it just seemed like they're like lovebirds, which made you give you some hope for Hollywood. Cause you just think like everything's so manufactured, but, um, But anyway, so that was part of it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
There was one at Louisiana State when I was at LSU.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
The second thing, oh, dude, I'd had an interview post Malone here the day before, and so I was so, like, just burnt out. Yeah. And I was just tired, you know, but I just went up there. We flew directly there to his golf course. It was crazy. Like, rich people were everywhere. Oh. Like, kids were driving to the bottom of the pool and bringing up mutual funds and shit. Like, way different. Damn.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Was that Mar-a-Lago? Yeah. It was something fancier than that. It was like fancier. It was New Jersey. Oh, OK. It was like Mar-a-Lago or something or whatever they have up there, you know?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
It was like kind of like this year, like Italian. There it is, dude. Whoa. And, bro, they had ducks out there in the pond that were fucking, like, organized as fuck. None of these gay-ass ducks you see at the park, like, that are just fucking doing dope or whatever. Right. Just eating fucking bread from strangers.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Yeah, bring up Glory Hole LSU. What? They had one, and you know where it was? I think it was in, I want to say the library. Whoa. Damn, they plugged that hole. Look at that. Oh, there's one right there taking a dump in Tarot. That's one of those, one of the halls there. Oh, there it is right there. Whoa, look at that. Look at that.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
These motherfuckers, I saw them polish off, I think, a sourdough, line up in a straight line. Classy. And perform, motherfucker. Damn. Ducks in a row. Oh, yeah. You could tell they were going to be lunch if they didn't land every fucking... If they didn't land every move in sequence. Right. So that was crazy. Then you had Secret Service everywhere, right?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
But they're still fans. You pull in, they frisk and shit, and they're all like, oh!
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
love the thing and then you're just taking selfies with them you're holding their gun right you're pointing their gun at them and they're like it'll shoot you know that's the best I love getting the working man like when you get like a garbage man or a cop and he's like hey comedy I'm like yes I want you as a fan that's the best dude the best yeah there's nothing better dude anytime if I'm walking down the street and I see a couple of guys digging in a hole or whatever hiding the bodies or whatever right Jews again yeah or funneling monies for fucking Schwab through one of those yeah
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
fucking Yiddish mattress sale tunnels or whatever, I always stop and get photos with those guys. Anybody that does something real.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Change it. Why are you telling us about it? Well, it's the same thing with America, even in like America supporting like the Gaza stuff. It's like what – then you're complicit. It's like all of a sudden we're complicit in it. That's what makes everything so tricky. It's like are we standing up for ourselves? Are we not standing up for ourselves? Who are we supposed to support?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
It used to feel like we knew what was supposed to happen.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
But then it brings me back to, like, I think the Vietnam times when you saw those protests.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Because I used to hear about the protester in Vietnam, and I'm like, what would they be protesting? Like... We're doing this war. That's what's supposed to happen. But then you realize that there was a group of people who ended up being a lot of times some of the coolest people who were like, this isn't right. Right. Right. Who didn't believe like the propaganda machine. Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
So it's crazy that if things could even get out then that the same kind of it's just so I don't know. It's just interesting.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Yeah, it's just crazy because then it's like, what happens? You just got to take care of yourself, take care of your loved ones. That's got to be important.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Oh, yeah, man. Especially – well, they started – I hate to say this.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
There's a lot of models, Downsy models. They got more talented. And I got proven wrong. I had always known that Down syndrome people couldn't walk backwards, right? Is that right?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
That had always been a big thing in our area. But now a woman disproved me on that.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
But it's hard to look through there when there's a wiener coming through. You'd take your eye out. Yeah, dude, don't be that weirdo that's trying to sightsee at a glory hall.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
That's the whole... Dude, that's the original game show right there. Oh, yes. That's great. Yeah, now it's like... I'm thinking of what it's called now. It's like... The floor is lava, dude. Right. Nothing. That has nothing on the glory hole is open.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
They're at theovonstore.com. And thank you so much for your support. Today's guest is a stand-up comedian. He has two podcasts, Tuesdays with Stories with Joe List and We Might Be Drunk with Sam Morrill. He's touring all over this year. He's a one of one.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Oh, yeah. It could be your pastor. It could be your future, dude. It could be some gay dude or woman. Nowadays, even lesbians will stop in there just to couture their jawline. They'll pop into a male glory hole.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
I don't know. You put the softball team in there. They'll hit a single at least through that thing.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Yeah, I could see a crossover. Why hasn't she been on SNL, I wonder? Ooh.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Get the fuck... Whoa. Look at those dogs walking on water. What religion is this? What the fuck is that? Dude, this is that new shit, man. This is what's coming now. Right. This is the new Christianity. This will be a story in the Bible one day. Brittany Griner shoots a three-pointer.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
, , , , , ,, P P P P P P P P P,實 ac , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , a a a a a to P P P P P P P P P P P P P P P P That's awesome. So if you were at the mothership, you can order Bodega Cat.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
And is it, it has alcohol in it? It is a big bottle of whiskey. Yeah. Okay. So if you can't drink, you can't drink, but you could get one for a friend. Yeah. You could watch your dad drink it, watch your mom drink it. Do you mix it with something?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Yeah, Burt is definitely the Neil Armstrong of alcohol. Yeah, yeah. Or whatever that guy is. He's just out on the moon.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Yeah, I'm just trying to think if there's something else we should talk about. Go through the news really quick story if there's a couple.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
had that gold card thing for wealthy immigrants to expedite citizenship yeah oh that's doing well oh that gold card yeah trump had that gold card is it doing well i heard they sold a thousand of them already which is what what's that five million i'm an idiot times one thousand that is uh 500 million thank you that's a lot of a lot of scratch no it's more than that it's five billion Is it? Jesus.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Do 5 million times 1,000. God. We should know this. You had it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
He pulled out the Trump card. President Trump proudly showed off the design of his administration's new $5 million gold card to reporters aboard Air Force One on Thursday. Let me just see what it looks like, dude. Yeah. Are they selling commemorative ones? They have to be. That's a smart move.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Bro. Fucking so Mao, dude. But that's wow that they're selling those. What do you think about that? Because now it's like. You can just be a citizen with $5 million.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Damn, that was good. Thanks. God, bro. That's a pretty decent start for an episode, I feel like.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
So it's become like a home for the elites. It's become the Saint Tropez or whatever. There you go. Of humanity. But do they still have to pass immigration tests? What is the rules with that?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Dude, I'm going to do that. If I get to meet him again, I'm going to ask him if I can have one of those as a gift.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Well, what does it say? Does he have any other information on it?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
You've never gotten a lady pregnant? I've never ejaculated in a woman.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
I've talked about this before. Yeah, my whole life I haven't.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Yeah. Man, I'm impressed. Good will spunking. That's my movie coming out. The proposal aims to supplement or replace the existing EB-5 immigrant investors visa program, which required foreign investors to create or preserve 10 permanent full-time jobs for U.S. workers.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
The gold card simplifies this process by allowing the wealthy foreigners to pay $5 million for a visa, granting them green card privileges and a route to citizenship. Do they still have to pass immigration? Let me see. At the White House press conference on February 26th, Trump and U.S. Commerce Secretary Howard Lutnick introduced the concept of a gold card as a new pathway to U.S. citizenship.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
It's not a bad idea that there's this golden ticket, kind of. Because at least they're making money off it. I'm just curious to see. They've talked about getting rid of the Fed, getting rid of the IRS. If that shit can happen.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Very radical. It'd be crazy. And we wouldn't have to pay taxes anymore. Like, just...
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Are they? Eggs are way through the roof. Yeah. They busted more people bringing eggs in than they busted fentanyl dealers, which is kind of insane.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Shipping and handling. I know. That's a good point, huh? You have to walk real slow with them bouncing in your head. Yeah. U.S. sees large rise in border seizures of eggs while fentanyl rates fall. Damn.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Damn. Wow. It's so much easier to catch an egg, though.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Dude, make a fucking Fenton omelet. That's what I would do.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Yeah, imagine the pride they would walk around with.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Dude, I quit. The last Hooters I went to was that one around the fucking West Bank over there.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Dude, I did not realize that. That's the NOLA one. That's the one where Anthony Davis allegedly knocked up the waitress. Remember that? Yeah. Who dat on the back, baby?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
I don't know. I don't know. Yeah, it'd be crazy to see what would happen, man. If they stop Hooters, we're all going to be in bad off.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
But you don't see somebody fasting that's using the fucking racial slurs. That's true. You don't see somebody fasting yelling out of their fucking window with their last living available energy.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Oh, you go to, there's definitely, was it just him there, or was it other people?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
You got to be fast. Yeah. That's a different kind of fasting. One more thing. Anything else you want to talk about again before we leave, Mark?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
She's going to be upset that we talked about her breasts, I bet, in the beginning.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
We were just joking, dude. I just watched White Lotus season one. That was great.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Well, it just shows you, man. I mean, I saw Luigi Mangione facing a slew of federal and state charges in the sling of health care CEO Brian Thompson could be sentenced to death if he's convicted of federal murder charges. And what criminal justice experts say was a rare but unsurprising move to pursue the death penalty by the Justice Department this week. Wow. Damn.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Dude, remember Attorney General Pam Bondi announced Tuesday that she's instructed federal prosecutors to seek the death penalty for Mangione 26. Dude, remember what happened with those Epstein binders? Remember that shit?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Oh, yeah, a lot of those guys love to cook when they're not fucking, like, sniping fucking Gazans on behalf of Israel. But, yeah, dude, he... Build that wailing wall. Jesus. Dude, I heard the wailing wall, this is the most Israel thing ever, the wailing wall has an ATM in it. Is that true?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Well, I think there was nothing new in the JFK, right? I think everybody just kind of like... It feels like there's nothing new there. But remember the binders? They gave them all to these, like, six, like, kind of bizarre influencers. Yeah. And look how—I mean, bro, how staged—this is the most staged thing ever, right?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
How could it take this many years? How fake or procured? It's almost like you're just—I bet in the background they are— threatening everybody, you're going to be on this list if you don't fucking file suit right now.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
And then look at this binders. I mean, how fake is that?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Oh, yeah. She did the college recruiting or whatever? Yeah, yeah. She ran the portal? Yes, exactly.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
It's getting fucking interesting in the world, guys. If you want to live in an interesting time, fucking this is it. This is it. You like playing the game Clue? This is it, man.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Yeah, every day, dude. The Pelicans suck still. Yeah, yeah. They fucking suck. What else is new? Yep, that's it. Saints, you hopeful for them next season?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
That's a lot, man. Congratulations, dude. I feel like I didn't ask you enough about your kids.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Is it fun having a kid in the city, or does it make you start to think about moving out?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Martin Norman, thanks so much, dude. You have your new series that's on YouTube?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Okay, page to stage. You got it. And you have your two podcasts, Tuesdays with Stories. Yep. We might be drunk. We might be drunk. Mark Norman, thanks so much, dude. Have a blast at Kill Tony, man. Thank you. If we can even say you're doing it. Yeah. Hoot at, dude. Hoot at for life. Good to see you, buddy. You too, man. Thank you, bro.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
What do a mechanic and an auto shop owner in Georgia, a taco restaurant operator in Arizona, and a life-saving medical innovator in Tennessee have in common? They're all small business owners, and they're all thriving on TikTok. Across the U.S., over 7.5 million businesses, from family-owned shops to entrepreneurs, are using TikTok to compete and grow.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
In fact, 74% of businesses on TikTok say TikTok is has allowed them to scale their operations, increasing sales and expanding to new locations. And that growth means jobs. Today, there are over 7.5 million U.S. businesses on TikTok employing more than 28 million people. And that number keeps growing. Small businesses thrive on TikTok. Learn more about TikTok's contribution to the U.S.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Oh, I'll fucking spin Gimel on that bitch, son. That's all I spin, dude. They used to call me Big Gimel in a lot of back alleys.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Jimmy Gimel Live. In a lot of Yiddish back alleys, they used to call me fucking Jimmy Gimel, dog. Oh, the willing wall. It should have at least two ATMs at it. I can't even believe this is an issue over there.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Yeah, only in the glory holes in Israel it says FDIC insured. That's it. F-D-I-C-K insured, dude. Nice. There it is. There it is. Holy shit. The only kosher ATM in the world. That's hilarious.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
He's a new father and he has a new series out called Page to Stage where comedians take something from their notebook and you see it build until it gets performed. Today's guest is a one of one, my Louisiana brethren, Mr. Mark Norman.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Wow. Speaking of going abroad, you have shows coming up abroad, man.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Do you ever go? Yes, man. Where are you going over there? Let me see some of his dates here. You're going to Reykjavik? Yeah, I think that's Iceland, right? Reykjavik. Oh, Reykjavik. That's how they say it?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Oh, yeah. Jesus, that's like a drunk text. Salford, United Kingdom, Cardiff, United Kingdom, Bristol, United Kingdom, Birmingham, London, England.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
That's going to be incredible, dude. So you have those shows coming up. That's everywhere over there.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Well, it's hard. That's one of the things people don't realize. You go to these places, people are like, stay, do this and that. But then, like, you do five, six shows, you're on the road then for two weeks, kind of. Right, right. Or, you know, you try to get into it, and it's like, well, how long are you going to be over? Are you going to be over there for three weeks, a month?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
They had one the other day that said he has up syndrome. This is a picture of J.D. Vance has up syndrome.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Oh, he has the best sense of humor. Honestly, I should send him one of these and see what he thinks about it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Yes, yeah, fire crotch. Dude, he was dressed like the Grand Wizard of Cracker Jack. Bring him on, baby.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Oh, dude, definitely, dude. This guy looks like he could fucking sign the Constitution with his cock, dude. This guy's...
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Oh, yeah, brother. That's it, dude. If this photo alone doesn't get the Tiger King out of prison.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Yeah, they're like, we made that shirt, but we didn't know he'd wear it like that.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
He's like, oh, I should have really showed up. He looks like the pilot for Malaysian Flight 370 or whatever. Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Dude, the one that went down on Key West, bro. That's a fucking – that thing landed on a cock, dude.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Trying to show all these people what it's all about, dude. They had Run DMC fly on one of the planes, dude.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
right here. Dude, and you have to listen to DMX when you get out of that plane, right? There's no way. The plane's upside down and now we have to exit. There's no way I don't put a fucking, I don't bounce a track on my phone right there. Dude, I put on probably some DMX as you walk out.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
There was something you had. I want to talk to you about a bunch of stuff. You have a new child. Yes, yes.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#574 - Mark Normand
Dude, unreal. And a lot of people thought Matt Rife is that guy who's trying to live forever or whatever.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Okay. Number of prostituted people. Nevada has more than twice as many prostituted people per capita as California and 63% more than New York.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
There we go. Yeah, I wonder what would that be like for a – For a woman, because I've gotten a Lady of the Night or whatever they're called, a mystical pussy. Yeah, just one time, I'm sure. I don't know what they call them.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Yeah, I got one in Amsterdam, right, where people go get them.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Yeah, the Mecca. The Mecca of whores. It is. It's like the Istanbul of like –
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
you know midnight coot or whatever you know and so i went there and oh here was the funny part my buddy and i both of us like snot like acted like we weren't going to go there so we both like went off by ourselves separate rooms like all right man night bud and then saw each other they were like that's tough that's when you just have to embrace it and then just do a four-step or something
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
But here was a sad part of it. You go in there and it seems like it's very alluring and the mirage of it is very compelling. But you go in there and right when you go in their door because they're standing out there and there's kind of some red lights inside of the room. You go in there in the main door and there's like a bouncer guy right there.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
And he's very, you know, tough guy. And he says something real tough or something. And then you kind of go like that. And then you go into the room and it's very much like a doctor's room. Like everything's kind of like covered in like paper or plastic. It feels like – Classy. It feels like – it feels very clinical.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Right. That's what it starts to feel like. So the magic of like any like romance or whatever is going on.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
I'm one of those guys who like would leave the strip club and be like, man, I think I, you know, I think there's a chance we're going to get her off the stage.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
We could put you in community college, babe, you know?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
So I think it's very hard. Like I can't get an erection like around broken glass or I can't get an erection I'm realizing around. Like some environments like that that are so clinical.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
I don't know if I'm a mugshot. That's a great question. If I do, it's in Mississippi or Louisiana. I'll have to check. That's a good thing to look up for.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Wow, yeah, that's just a head shot. Go back up to the second one.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Very young, very impressionable. There I am. What did I do?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Yeah, you want to pull some Clairol out of your pussy or what? Like people smuggling makeup in there or something? Yeah. Is Clairol still makeup?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Clairol? I thought it was a makeup company, is it?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Fuck it. Yeah, like what does love look like for you? What's your love life like? Do you have a boyfriend or you don't have a boyfriend?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Yeah. Do you feel like you've missed out on some good ones or no?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Is he straight still or in a woman or is he now a gay woman?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
I wish my mom would have gotten laid more, I think.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Yeah, dude. Yeah, that's definitely, I got stuck after the prom. This dude was crying and he had borrowed his, his dad had left him a long time ago and he borrowed his mom's business blazer and it had those, uh, shoulder pads in it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Yeah, it was classy, but it was also just like a sign of the times, you know, like young men being raised by single moms and having to wear their mom's business blazer to the prom.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
And it kind of it was like he but he was bawling about something. He thought he looked like Damon Wayans or something, but some bullshit or whatever. I don't know. He was out of his fucking mind. And I was trying to get laid, but also be nice. So I was waiting to go see my girlfriend. But it was just a nightmare.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Yeah. I know I got stuck giving him a ride after prom.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Oh, yeah. I think she was – I don't know if she was making love to maybe this auto mechanic one time. I don't know. He would always come around and look around at us.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
But he's like, everybody says I look like Damon Wayans and I want to have my own life. And I was like, motherfucker, you don't look anything like Damon Wayans. Is he black? Oh, no. He was kind of like tan or whatever. Like, bitch, you don't look anything like fucking Damon Wayans, dude. You're a closeted homosexual. Just fucking come out of the closet so we can go to this party.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Oh, he loved it. Yeah, yeah. He looked nuts. Was he balding? Like, what was the problem? He did have a skinned head and he had, you know, and he seemed kind of black sometimes just for fun. But he was a great guy. Yeah. Dang, that's, yeah, I guess that's interesting. Sorry to act like that about that.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
But now does it become a thing where you don't have a boyfriend because it's almost become a thing? Does that ever happen?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
And are you saving yourself for marriage type thing or are you still sexually active?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Really? I know a lot. I feel like I could name at least five or six guys that would definitely make love to you that I know firsthand.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
I mean, or just, you know, like, I mean, because, yeah, I don't even, yeah, but it's like, what am I even talking about? Is that a crazy thing to say to someone?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Yeah, I think, yeah. He was just – I don't know what he was doing. He might not even have been a mechanic. I mean it was in our town. It was like if you were greasy enough and kind of – you know, people would do mechanicing in their yard, you know, type of thing where like, come drop the car off in my house. And people would do a lot of like at home mechanicing type stuff.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Are you kidding me, man? I know some people that would definitely probably knock you up even.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
No, Grace, it's definitely, you know, I think there's a lot of semen heading your way in 2025.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Right. But then they're just out there slurping or whatever to feel decent.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
I don't either. This is why I don't have a daughter, dude. This is why I don't have a fucking daughter, dude. What do you do if your daughter is like a tramp and you're the dad?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
That's when you got to start. Do you have a talk with him, you think? Have any of your friends ever, they're like, damn, my dad had a talk with me because he knew I was like getting smashed so much or doing a lot of sex or whatever.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Probably something from that Scarlet Letter book. What are some names in that book? Something from the, you know, the days when people used to die on long ship journeys type shit. You know what I'm saying?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Roger Chillingworth. That would be one. Yeah, maybe I'll name her that.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Danger? Danger. And everybody in Boston named Danny anyway. No matter what their name is, it becomes Danny.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
This conversation? Yeah. No, I feel like it too. Do you feel like I am?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
You're doing great. I don't even think maybe I'm asking about the best stuff.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
No, I think it's interesting because I never really, I don't think, I'm not good at, I don't talk to women that much about sex stuff.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Oh no. Just like, it was like, uh, Like, people didn't have to have a real shop to be a mechanic.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
We're going to get somebody to come in here and just. Look, I'll do it like this and you guys just figure it out.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
You know, when I was growing up, I had a job cleaning out wishing wells over there in my parish. And there weren't many of them. Yeah, I agree. You know, but I wasn't much of a worker as well. But I will say this, that wishing wells, they bring in big loot. You know, the Trevi Fountain in Rome collects over 1.5 million a year. Yep. What I'm saying is spare change really adds up.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
That's why I want to introduce you to Acorns. Acorns, this episode is sponsored by them. Acorns is a financial wellness app that makes it easy to start investing with the money you've got right now. You don't need to be an expert. Acorns will recommend a diversified portfolio that fits you and your money goals. You don't need to be rich. Start with just $5 a day or even just your spare change.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
And here's the best part. Sign up now and Acorns will boost your new account with a $20 bonus investment. Offer only available at acorns.com slash Theo. That's A-C-O-R-N-S dot com slash T-H-E-O. Get your $20 bonus investment now. Paid non-client endorsement. Compensation provides incentive to positively promote Acorns. Investing involves risk.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
The hypothetical calculations are for illustrative purposes only and are not representative of the performance of any Acorns portfolio and should not be used to predict the investment results of any customer. Acorns Advisors LLC is an SEC registered investment advisor. View important disclosures at acorns.com slash T-H-E-O.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Even if you think it's a bit overhyped, AI is suddenly everywhere from self-driving cars to molecular medicine to business efficiency. If it's not in your industry yet, it's coming fast. But AI needs a lot of speed and computing power. So how do you compete without costs spiraling out of control? Time to upgrade to the next generation of the cloud. Oracle Cloud Infrastructure, or OCI.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
OCI is a blazing fast and secure platform for your infrastructure, database, application development, plus all your AI and machine learning workloads. OCI costs 50% less for compute and 80% less for networking, so you're saving a pile of money. Thousands of businesses have already upgraded to OCI, including Vodafone, Thomson Reuters, and Suno AI.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Right now, Oracle is offering to cut your current cloud bill in half if you move to OCI. For new U.S. customers with minimum financial commitment, offer ends March 31st. See if your company qualifies for this special offer at oracle.com slash T-H-E-O. That's oracle.com slash Theo. I don't even know what to ask about.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Yeah, it's good. It was okay. I got a fever or something, you know? And so I was like...
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Dude, that's such a great thing if at the end of the year you actually have a big divorce for them.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
And so you have, so just so my listeners know, so you, I know you, because we had Brianna Chickenfrow and you guys had a podcast together.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
It's no longer. Yes. And so you guys, and you guys had been friends for a long time.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
That's sweet. That's sweet. And have you guys kept a good friendship after? I know that there's been like, I'm not trying to get into like the tumultuousness of things or whatever, but how does that stand today? Because it must be tough to like have a business with a friend.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Very sweet of you. This is very, yeah, it's almost like the first Thanksgiving or whatever. Yeah. You know, whenever they did that.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
You know, what's interesting is I've had times where I was like I was going through moments with friends and stuff, you know, and most of them evened out over time.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
But the toughest part about it like was in the – like the times where we weren't getting along or we were having differences that I didn't have my friend at times. That was really the shittiest part.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
It was like even though I would have like a leg to stand on about why I was upset about stuff, sometimes I'd be like – I'd be like, man, fuck Scott, dude. I've got to call Scott right now and tell him. Yeah, right? I couldn't even call my friend.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Yeah. And I've actually been doing good about quitting. I think the tough part is that the worst thing about quitting is that you have to every day you're like, I'm going to quit. And then you don't. And then you set yourself up for failure.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
That was kind of the worst part sometimes was just hitting that type of moment where like, oh, man. Because it's hard to kind of have good friends, you know?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Oh yeah. I got some good pals from growing up. So, and then I've made more over the years, kind of like people go through things. A lot of friends get married and stuff. And since I'm not married, you kind of fall into this weird place where you just become like, you're just friends with whoever's not married. Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
I would say probably in your 30s it starts getting where, like, well, I guess it depends on where you're from. Like, where I'm from, Louisiana, people get married early.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
And so you lose a couple guys right out of the gate. And right after they get married, their hair falls out immediately. I don't know why.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
That's true. Yeah. And maybe some of those guys know their hair's about to fall out.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Their bald dad is just having a conversation with them.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
They're like, dad, I'm only 15. They always had that one kid that went bald way early, you know? And people would use him to buy alcohol. They're like, what do you mean? He can't buy liquor. And be like, he's bald. Damn it. He just stuck out his 401k.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Yeah, he's bald. He rode here on his bicycle. You think a fucking child is bald, damn it? He's a DUI. He already bought the booze. That's why he's on the bike. Selling the liquor, damn it. So, yeah, but I still have good friends from when I was growing up.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
I think, yeah, and then I met, you know, it's been like, I think like since I work in business where I kind of travel around and stuff, you meet a lot more people probably than you do if you just stay in one, live in one town.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Yeah, and you guys are—so Catholic is the one— With the priests. Okay, yeah. The one where they're playing freeze tag with the kids, but they didn't tell the kids?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Did you do anything? You put eye black on or anything?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Yeah, yeah. Oh, it must be horrible when a priest sees tits. He's like, oh, fuck. Good day, son.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
What are we talking about? Fuck. Yeah, I've never been. I'm trying to think if I've ever been Catholic or not. I might have been. We were Presbyterian for a while, I know. And then my mom got in a fight with somebody outside of the church once. And so then I think we were Methodists or sixth Methodists or something. I don't know how many there are. I've got to ask my mom.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Uh, no, it's just like, you don't drive far to the church, wherever that one is.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
It was, yeah. It was like, okay, this is it, you know? Yeah. Yeah, it was like that kind of. Yeah. Um. Okay, so you ended up in New York. Was that your first time you had lived in New York when you went there with Brianna?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
to get up on stage yeah and like even give it a whirl like open mics and shit I just wouldn't but uh yeah cause you're so endearing I mean one of the things that I always admire about you is just uh you being you is it's like immensely charming to like a like it's like uh you can't help but not like wanna follow along with your world it feels like yeah that's really sweet thank you yeah it's a it's it's great
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
You got it. Yeah, it's another day. Yeah, yeah, that's the thing. January's a lot of pressure, you know? It's a lot of pressure at the beginning of the year to get it all right.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Oh, yeah. It's kind of crazy. If you don't know who you are, then you're a comedian. Most comedians don't know who they are because that's why they're putting on a show. Some of the shows, over time, they're trying to figure out who they are. They're trying to manage this
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
presentation that they put to the world you know I think because like when they were young maybe whoever they were didn't feel comfortable or whatever in the world so they started making this them yeah and um anyway that's a little bit meta I think but um what was the did you ever like there was ever a point in your life where you were like oh my god I want to be a performer think about it um
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
I liked when people laughed. I didn't – I didn't – I didn't – I think I didn't – I never really trusted people that much, but I knew if they were laughing that they couldn't – not like me.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Like, I feel like it would be impossible to hate somebody and laugh at the same time. Kind of.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
You can, but you, but if you're telling you, but I would know.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Yeah. So I think there was something like that for me, probably. Do you think you kind of had that comedian thing like that, you know, that you wanted to be a comedian or do you think that you just wanted to be a performer? Did you kind of know what it was like where you wanted to end up and do you still know?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Well, I think that's kind of the goal. I think that's the goal. It just feels kind of tough, you know?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Oh, it was just cool to see you and your friends in the green room. That was dope, dude. And just like to see like just I wanted to like kind of see what your energy was about going up on stage. And the room was buzzing, man. People were so excited.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
I think especially with podcasts and stuff, I noticed this. I've sat in the audience and watched some of my friends who are podcasters as well.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
It is a lot of pressure, dude. God, being alive is just damn. It's a lot sometimes, you know? It just feels like a lot. Grace O'Malley, thanks for coming in today.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
And you just want to kind of listen and be there. In the room with them. You're like, that's my person or that's my friend. Whatever it is, I fuck with them. I just want to be in the room while they're doing whatever.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Oh, you mean being on stage just as your podcast? Yeah. Oh, I've never done that.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Okay. So if you leave, that means do you still have your rights to... I didn't make anything when I was there. Half your podcast. But you had a contract. You got paid something annually. Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Oh, that's right. She was bringing maybe different fans from that also. Yeah, yeah. Got it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Yeah, and also some of that stuff is, as much as it, like, it's, like, it's live and learn sometimes.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Oh, yeah. And you know what? I think no matter what you get involved in, you have to go through that. You have to go through periods of that. And even with stand-up, you can't escape that. It's like you just have to get it on stage. It's like we all learn it. I still learn it every time I take some weeks off and go back on stage. It's like, God, this feels new and scary. Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Oh, thanks. Very big fan. So this is very sick. Yeah, I'm a big fan of yours, too. You always just seem like such a human person.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
It was tough. Do you have a close or do you have it set up? Are you telling stories? Are you telling more jokes? What's your set like right now?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Now, do you feel like a comedian or do you feel like somebody that's pretending to be a comedian?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
At least... You know what, dude? I'll pay to come watch you be this honest. I will pay $42 plus fees, okay? To come to a room and watch somebody be this honest.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
No, but I think, look, there's something about honesty. There's not as much of it in the world. I would literally pay to go to a room. And watch somebody be honest with themselves about what's going on. I'm learning it. I think we all pretend to be something until we get the hang of it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Oh, we just been doing it longer. We don't know the fuck we're doing.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
I don't know. I mean, I think at like about 11 years, you start to be like... I don't know. There's some different moments. I mean, thank you. That's sweet of you to say that.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
I mean, I definitely feel like I don't have a, like, this is, like, it is my job now, you know?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
For a long time, I didn't know if it was my job, you know? I felt like it was, but you keep going home, like, at Christmas, and you don't have a real job. And you tell me, like, I'm a comedian. Like, whatever, dude, you know? Where's your husband, you know? Because everybody just thinks you're homosexual, you know? Yeah, of course. Until you get on some sort of television or platform.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
I think. Well, I think if people get into like the spotlight or get like popularity, popularity, ego, all that stuff is super dangerous, you know?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Yeah, maybe we'll scratch out these f***ing posters that we drew.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
It's a poster that says, you're a f***er. You held up at my show. But yeah, I'll sign it. Thanks, guy. So yeah, I think there's like... So that kind of stuff gets tricky. And then I think there comes a point where it's like... You don't have anything else. And so it's like whenever you give up anything else, like there were times I quit to do real estate.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
There was times I quit and I fucked up like the third contract I ever did and I had to pay somebody's lease for like six months. How'd you fuck up that bad? I fucking put myself as the guarantor or whatever. Are you shitting me?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
I was going through some weird shit sometimes and I would pee in the sink at night at my girlfriend's because I didn't want to pee loud and wake up the family, right?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Oh, shit. With the family. And the cat would go in there and like mill around in a sink and fucking snitch me out. The mom ended up knowing that I was urinating in the sink.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Ugh. She said, has your boyfriend been peeing in the sink?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
And you don't realize it sometimes like you can be getting infected by it or that like or suddenly you'll try to super manage how you're perceived. which some of that's normal because you want to protect yourself. But I think all of that's just, it's scary.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Who knows? Whatever, Grace. Whatever. We're all going through it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Goddamn. You got – I mean you're going to figure it out. And I think it's interesting these days I think because – I'll say this. There used to be more of stairways for how people got into comedy, right? There was like –
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Obviously you got on stage, but then you got on different like little – like there was like a Comedy Central 10 Minutes or there was like these – now there's like Dry Bar and different groups like that. But there was other small groups where you did comedy sets that they put out there, right? And now a lot of that's disappearing. There was like – what was it? Late Show –
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
I want to let you know about some new tour dates. I will be in Nashville, Tennessee on May 3rd at the Bridgestone Arena. You can get your tickets starting Wednesday, January 8th at 10 a.m. local time with presale code RATKING. We also have tickets remaining in East Lansing, Eugene, Victoria, B.C. in the Canada, College Station, Belton, Texas, San Antonio, Oxford, Fayetteville,
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
There were some late shows where you would just sit around in a panel, right? Where people would start to build their name.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
And now I think just a lot of like podcasting has kind of become that. It's taken the place of a lot of things.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Whereas before there was maybe more acting roles or things like that for comedy. Because there's not even that many comedies now. Like shows.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
So I think that you have to have some place where you start to build, you know, that's like an entertainment outlet. So I think podcasting is that, you know, I think it's just kind of become that. Or TikTok or some sort of like just people's own social media. Because sure, you have the podcast, but then also the clips are kind of what bring people into your world a lot of times.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
I know it's been a while since you had a man in you, but this ain't it. But don't take any of my ideas. No, no, don't take any of my, I'm not trying to give you any advice.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Because that's even advice, huh? Damn, what an idiot.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
I feel like you're doing good. Your sister's here.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Yeah. So yeah. And just find new things that are creative. That's just like one of my goals. I start thinking of her this year. It's like, well, what things could I do that would be create? Like, like would seem like unique or that could try and be more creative.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Yeah. We wrote it and we start making it in January.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Yeah. I mean, it took us like two years and we tried to get financing. Nobody wanted to help. And so we're making it ourselves.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
So it's like... Yeah, I think I thought – like I never wanted to be an actor or anything like that, and I don't really think that that is a world of mine. But I thought like if I look back and I was like I get a chance to make – I got to do something with David Spade who I like idolized. Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
We would write together. Together? Yeah, I still have my apartment in LA. Oh, gotcha. So whenever I'm there, we've worked on it over the years in tons of ways.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
But it's been fun. I can't even believe it. I definitely have learned a lot. And we think that it's funny, you know. But if I look, I'm laying in my deathbed or whatever. Yeah. I think it'd be neat to be able to say that I got to do that. Absolutely. And also that I tried to do it, you know, cause people may make it seem like you can't do this. You have to have all these special people.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
If yourself is an asshole, bro. Yeah, because they got people out there now that are not even gay that are being gay. They have all types of people like fake Native Americans. Yeah. Like every week they're busting like one of these politicians for saying they were Honduran or something. You know, just a lot of bullshit.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Like I haven't had an agent help me. Nobody's. And so that to me is like the kind of shit that I like, you know, you don't think I can do this. Watch me.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Yeah, there's nothing. The only thing different between you and me is that you've done it already. That's the only thing.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
I don't know. That shit makes me fucking activated for some reason.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
I'm ready to hide somebody's kneecaps in their ass, dude.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
I mean, it'd be... Look, if anything, I get to sit around with him for five weeks and laugh, and we have a good time, so it'd be cool. That's so sick.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
That's the toughest thing is scariest is that like, you know, once you move on, you can't there's no. Yeah. Like that scene or whatever is locked in.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
You know, so and I'm not a great actor, you know, it's like, you know, I'm going to do my best. I have a plan and and I'm excited about what we wrote. You also worry that if you wrote it now and it comes out in seven months, will any of the will a joke still be funny? I'm sure that sort of thing.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
He does. I don't know what the fuck I'm doing, dude. But he's definitely. So I don't know. It's just a lot of little things you learn. Like, oh, this is maybe why I don't. This isn't something that I love. What did your mom get you for Christmas?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
And do you all have any brothers? Does he have any sons?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
That's true. Dude, my buddy Ernest used to do it in a car wash all the time. He'd call me. I was like, how are you doing? He's like, getting me to the car wash. It's raining. Wow. And is your dad kind of a romantic guy still? Do they still have a romantic relationship, your parents?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Yeah, yeah. It's just all like. It's like a fucking salad bar hanging out of his face.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Yeah, like that guy just fucking whistling tunes, just whistling the soundtrack of The Departed all the time. Just rehearsing for lines he doesn't even have. He just always wanted to be a mobster. Who was on your Boston Mount Rushmore?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Yeah, it got bizarre, but he was also selling liquor too. That was a strength. It's selling a liquor, but you're also up so early.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Do you think he still has the pulse of the streets in Boston or no?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
He moved to Vegas now, I think. I think he lives in Las Vegas.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Oh, I didn't know all that. Oh, you can't get caught.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Yeah. And that's a shit. Yeah. The brothers picked it up a couple of years ago. Remember when the brothers was zapping Asians everywhere?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
You know what I mean? Yeah. I'm trying to think if you seem like – because what are you? You are –
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
And the news kept being like, Asian people are under attack. You're like, yeah, my brothers.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Yeah, your dad's like that guy who just walks across the floor like this, and he's like... Remember doing that shit to people?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
They sit on the milk carton and it opens? Yeah. People did that to me. Really?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
That's the Irish hello right there. Yeah. It was at a 21 Savage concert? Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Like, oh, you, oh, and then they say that's cultural appropriation. You're like, give me a fucking break, dude.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Okay. Nope. No. Yeah. No judgment for me here. I, um, yeah, I think, yeah, Irish or some people are really fucking Irish. Have you seen that video of that baby? He's like breastfeeding and he orders another tit or whatever.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Well, I'm sorry that you got abused by a brother like that.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Oh, for now, yeah. Two weeks later, you're like, let's run it back.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Yeah, so that was brutal. I got to think of somebody good to set. Well, now that's sad. I shouldn't have said that.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Well, yeah, I think you do. I think it's just, you know, I think I would have no idea.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
I'm not going to fucking tell you, dude. It's quite all right. No, we're going to get some fucking real dogs in here to smash you, Gracie.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Oh, yeah. I saw that. I don't know how I feel about that. I don't know what to do with that. It's just a thing that happens. She's almost like the evil Knievel of like pussy.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Yeah, it just seems crazy. And then what are you really doing? It's almost just like people just running and just kind of jousting themselves into your vagina real quick and then we're running off.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Well, I wonder if this is the thing you're starting to see because of OnlyFans. Like, people are having to start to one-up each other.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
I don't know if I would even enjoy something like that, you know? Like, I mean, even if you were doing it, you know, where, like, I'm going to make love to 100 women. I'd be like, eh. At like 11 women, I would definitely want to chill, have a Gatorade or something, get on my phone.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Listen to some Scott Stapp or whatever. Did you see that Scott Stapp, that their band has made more this year than they ever made before?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
I thought that was pretty interesting. Bring that up, brother.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
He like orders a round for everybody in the room or something. It's some, they're breastfeeding it like a family thing or whatever, like a birthday or whatever.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
You know, I just went through this on my phone and computer. I had to get it all figured out. I was paying for extra services that I didn't want. You know, they had some different annual, some of them were annual, some of them were monthly. There were things I couldn't believe I was still involved in. Rocket Money helped me figure that all out.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Today's episode is brought to you by BetterHelp. It's a new year here in the world, and that means that you might have the same problems. That's what I'm noticing for myself. I've got some of the same things, and I'm not getting into self-pity, but I'm just noticing, hey, some of this stuff, I keep carrying it. I keep carrying it. I don't want to have this luggage anymore.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
I even met with a therapist today and was talking about some of those exact same things. Better help. is offers therapy better help us fully online, making therapy affordable and convenient serving over 5 million people worldwide. Life isn't about resolutions that fade by February. It's about picking up the pen and becoming the author of your own life.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Yeah, it's a rough one kind of. I told some rough, oh, yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
And you can think of therapy as an editorial partner. Write your story with BetterHelp. Visit BetterHelp.com slash T-H-E-O to get 10% off your first month. That's BetterHelp, BetterHelp.com slash T-H-E-O. Dude, your friends were so funny the other night. You have the best friends.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
oh my one of my first jokes was like oh i need a job a blow job that's classic though come on it was pretty bad thanks at least we have each other right it was pretty bad um so yeah i stopped by the comedy club the other night and you were doing stand-up how long so how long have you been doing stand-up just so because some audience won't know you so um you're a podcaster and a comedian yes okay and how long have you been doing stand-up
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
That guy, I think one of his lips was sweating a little.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
That's all right. I was so embarrassed. If you think somebody recorded your whole conversation, just because then you don't even know what you've said. No, no, my God, no. Not that you say something crazy. We're having a good time.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Yeah. I was like, ah, fuck. That's being alive. Being alive, they made it interesting. Here, right here. Creed reached their highest calendar year earnings in 2024, grossing $64.8 million from 825,000 tickets across 55 performances. Damn. That's their highest calendar year earnings. Is that ever? Is there any more information with it?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
That's crazy to think because weren't they playing stadiums before?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Grace, you would be... I would fail miserably. You think you would?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Maybe give me, what, 11 years? Oh, 11 years. Yeah, I thought you were talking about in a couple of months.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Fuck, I'd be brave of you. I would pledge allegiance to that.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
There goes my hero. Does Creed even sing that song? I have no idea. Truly and honestly. But yeah, it says right there, Creed earned more money in 2024 than they did in any other year over the 30-year career.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Like he'd been through it. Yeah. Oh, yeah. He looked like crack rock, dude.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
He seems pretty healthy right there. Looks like a good drinking night out.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
He's the best at taking jokes and telling jokes. Hopefully he had a good time. I almost went and met him for dinner that night, actually. Have you ever spent time around him?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
You should do his comedy festival. He does a comedy show here every year that rhyming is for charity. Oh, no shit. It'd be fun to get along with him. Oh, hell yeah. If you wanted to. If you guys got to meet him and you guys got along. I'm trying to think. You think he'd fuck with me?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
I'm fucking with you. Cool, cool, cool, cool, cool, cool, cool. I'm a fan.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
I think you're. Yeah, I'm curious to see. Yeah, I'm just excited to fucking be along for the ride and see what goes on.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
We'll see. January 10th. Yeah, I don't want to think too much about it because I think it's – what if it's horrible and then it's like you have to put it out? Oh, yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
So that's the kind of shit we're doing. I'm trying to think of – you have a new podcast coming out or it's out already?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Are you considered a diversity hire? Yeah. Why? Because you're redheaded?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Oh, yeah. Bayleaf, huh? Back bayleaf. Do they have back bayleafs?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Grayson Valley is officially unwell. So that means you're officially working with their network. So that's happened.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
So I already separated from the, from your previous podcast before this happened.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
And is it a better deal than you had at Barstool? Yeah. Oh, that's good.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
And especially if you start taking on a lot of kicks this year, you're probably going to need some health insurance, you know?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Oh, yeah. Get you a little couple grams of Plan B. Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Get it something from that ditch on you, dude. He'll sell you something, bro. Plan B should do a powder, huh? Yeah. How great would it be to do a line of Plan B?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Yeah, dude. My buddy's aunt used to fucking shed that like a hole in her throat or whatever. And they used to boof cocaine right down it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Right through that little birdhouse door she had on her neck hole.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Yeah. She had that little birdhouse door. What else is going on? What else is happening in the news right now? We have not confirmed that the explosion was caused by very large fireworks and or a bomb carried in the bed of the rented Cybertruck and is unrelated to the vehicle itself.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Okay. Yeah. And so what did that mean, taking it serious? Like, just getting up more? Like, getting into, like, the circuits or what?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Yeah. Dude, the toughest thing about a Cybertruck, what do you drive, Grace? What do you drive?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Whipping work in that bitch, son. That thing's awesome.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Oh, yeah. It was good. All right, Papa. Yeah. He's in that bitch for good.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
You ever are. Didn't you ever make out in your backseat of that car with any men or anything like that? I mean, I'm sure you had some dates, huh?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
God. And Nora, you don't coach her on dating or anything?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
But it's just been something that's been in your life.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Now, what if a man came along and he's looking for marriage? Do you think that that's something you would actually consider, you think?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
He better be a prince. He better be. And there's gotta be some... I'm trying to think of... What's your ideal man? It's such a dumb question, isn't it?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Yeah. You want this pussy? You're never going to get it, whitey. Don't you come honky honky and around this thing, around this little fucking kitty chamber whitey. Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
I feel you. Sometimes I would get so nervous. I followed a woman one time for like seven or eight blocks and I finally caught up to her and I was like, I was so nervous. I just was like, I'm not following you. That's what I said.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Fucking walked off. Yeah. I'm not following you. And someone was uphill. It was like obvious that I was fucking following her, dude. My face was all wet. She started running. Huh? She started running fast. No, she was moving quick, kind of, you know, with pace or whatever. Yeah, Shane just won Cracker of the Year. I saw this the other day.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Somebody said winner got to use the N. That was his thing. Winner got to use the N word. Is that what Antonio said one time or something?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
You do? Yeah. This is it? This is it. Cracker of the year.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
I think you can do it once. All right. It's not like a, you don't even, it's not even like a month.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
No. Yeah. You should, there's gotta be a prize. Yeah. Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
I mean, you can, I don't, I don't say it. I mean, I'll think it sometimes loudly or whatever, but you will not. I'm not that guy.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Somebody in our town used to write it down all the time and throw it in, like put a message in a bottle and throw it out into the water.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Yeah, and then like some dad and his kid are just walking along the stream and the kid finds it. He's like, what's this?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
It's just sad that that kind of shit is just like... That's unfortunate. It's that kind of shit that's ruining our waterways. That's what I'm saying. Goddamn. Have you ever been in a contest? Did you ever win like a most talented or funniest contest?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
You should have to stay in school to even be able to do it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
I was having fun. And were you getting wasted at parties and stuff and like having you?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Oh, really? Yeah. You were fucking just... I was just... The party stops here, boys.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, we used to have this guy in our town, this fellow he had. Well, a lot of Irish, they've always equated the Irish with like. I don't want to say like a step up from having Down syndrome or whatever, but it's a possibility. Like we had a guy in our town, I've told this story before, but he had Down syndrome and his mom didn't know it, right?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Never got the paperwork or the blood test or whatever. And so she just thought he was Irish, right? She thought he's Irish and she's like buying him all this Boston. Are you talking about Shane? Huh? This wasn't Shane. Shane probably knows the guy. But this was just a local DS guy, you know. Oh, but his mom would get him all this Boston Celtic shit and Notre Dame shit.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
It was like, you know, and the train that came in our town didn't even go to Boston, so it would probably never go to Boston. But whenever he would misbehave or whatever, they would put him in this baby crib even when he was an adult. And he had this thing where he just would not go out of it. He would stay in the crib. Oh, wow.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Like a playpen, not a crib, but like a baby's play little area or whatever. And he would stay in it even like 14, 15 years old. Yeah, something like that. What else did I see recently? Oh, there was the LSD Diplo. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Diplo trips on LSD.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Look at Anderson. He's probably getting sick from being, could be from gay for me. Yeah, Diplo is definitely, every time I'm in Las Vegas, I see that guy.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Wow. And so you were just, now was it like you were overnight suddenly on stage having to do a lot of time or no?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Yeah, he loves to farty. That's so brave, dude, to go on live television on LSD.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
I would smoke my own nuts, bro. I could not even fart, dude. I would take my penis off and just fucking hide it in somebody's face, dude. I could not. I would freak the fuck out, dude.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
You did? Yeah. You did LSD when you were on camera?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Oh, yeah. The other one's shit. Yeah, I remember throwing a bunch of rocks at a bunch of grass or whatever. We thought there was like these little people in it or whatever. We thought we kept hearing them yell every time we throw the rock in there.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Oh, in the morning, half my buddy's driver was in that fucking yard. We're all sweating and our shoulders were hurting.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Yeah, just fucking just they had like these elephant ear things in the ditch. And we thought that like we kept throwing these rocks. I was like, listen, you can hear these people scream when you throw it in there.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Eighth of a dump truck of driveway gravel into that ditch. I'm trying to think of some famous LSD trips. I mean, I had some good ones. I had one where I like. It was in LSU. I took mushrooms to a party. And a lot of people had never taken them. And I gave them all to them. And I was like, let's play hide and go seek. And I just counted. And they all went and hid.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
I've still never looked for them. Yeah, fuck them, dude. If they can't handle that fucking mountain lion bitch, then get out of the fucking...
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
My favorite thing ever. I used to be with my buddy Jeffrey and Scotty and Nate. We'd all be outside smoking, smoking dope or whatever, smoking flour or weed or whatever. And I'd come back in a few minutes early and. Jeff's dad would be always sitting in the house just reading a newspaper or whatever. And I'd come in. I'm like, Mr. Mike, they – you're like, what's going on?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
I'm like, just – Jeff was being kind of – I don't know. Like he just – he kept taking his shirt off or whatever. And Mr. Mike had issues with like – Gay. Yeah, I saw that coming. Yeah. So the second I was like, he had his shirt off, whatever, he'd be like, you can feel his fucking teeth just climbing over his tongue through the newspaper, right? And so I would just plant that seed, dude.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
I would just go. And they would come in. They'd be stoned out of their brain. They'd come in the house. And he'd be like, Jeffrey! And he'd fucking have them come in there. He'd just roast them for being homosexuals.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Okay. Yeah. And do people from outside of Boston look differently at people than inside of Boston?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
And Jeff's stoned out of his face, has no idea what's going on.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
It was a good time. I mean, it was just, it wasn't worse. So you're like throwing your boys under the bus. I'll like fucking be in the bus driver and all the seats are under the bus.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Yeah, I just like that. I like it. I like just creating something, right? Like, let's see what happens here if we set this thing up this way.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
There was that one famous story. Who's the famous, there was two members of, I think Fleetwood Mac that took LSD. Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
The night that Fleetwood Mac lost Peter Green and Danny Kerwin to LSD. Oh, they died? It's all amid a manic psychedelic party in a commune-like mansion. Green, I think it's Peter Green is the guy's name, was drawn down into the basement and arrived out of the other side in tears. In the band's eyes, he was distraught.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
despite Green claiming to have had an extraordinary experience and stating that he played the best guitar of his life down there. Another member of the band present that day was Danny Kerwin. Fate also besieged him that night. Peter Green and Danny Kerwin both went together to that house in Munich. Okay, that's where they were after a show.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Their one-time manager, Clifford Davis, recalls, "...both of them took acid, as I understand. Both of them, as of that day, became seriously mentally ill. It would be too much of a coincidence for it to be anything other than taking drugs, as of that day."
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
"...a fear the rest of the band felt an intense sense of dread in that place and managed to scurry away with the two heavily intoxicated members." While Green would recover and enjoy a creative life away from the spotlight despite persistent problems, things fared differently for Kerwin. Danny had been a nervous and sensitive lad from the start.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
He was never really suited to the rigors of the business Mick Fleetwood once opined. Touring is hard and the routine wears us all down. One night, while backstage, this regression came to the fore. Danny was being odd about tuning his guitar. Mick Fleetwood remembers. He got up suddenly and bashed his head into the wall, splattering blood everywhere.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
I've never seen him do anything violent in all the years I'd known him. The rest of us were paralyzed in complete shock. Damn. He was wonderful, but he couldn't handle the life, eventually ending up homeless on the streets of London. Wow.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Yeah, I think taking a hit of acid or something, and next thing you know, you're just, you don't, you know, you don't know what you're doing. Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
That's a thing, dude. I would just, I don't know if I could be a man and a woman. Do you think you could handle it?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Oh, from where I'm from? I'm trying to think of my Boston one. Oh, my Boston one would be... Is it okay if I do a Boston one? Oh, please, please.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Oh, Will Hunting. So you got him. You got Tom Brady. You got Dutch Smith. Bring up Dutch Smith. This is him.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Go further down. They start interviewing people. Oh, back up. Back.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
What a fucking motley crew that is. So the guy in the middle was like, yeah, stay dehydrated, meet my attorney up there, my boy Dutch Smith. He's on my list.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
The Dunkin' Donuts over there. I got to talk to my lawyers. He's like, I got to do some legal work.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
They have—yeah, they have—yeah, because Boston's interesting. They got a lot of racism up there, you know?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
That's classic. Oh, yeah. What do they call up there? Ice cold coffee? Ice coffee? That was good. They call it cold coffee. He's a freaking crazy person.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Yeah, yeah. You know, yeah. You know he's not studying to be a lawyer. Can you do accents? Do I do them? Can you do accents? Yeah. No, I can't really do them that much, I don't think. Sometimes I wish I spent more time focusing on stuff like that.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Take you back to Ireland. That's fine. Yeah, I'm bad. But I think it would be fun to work on, I guess. I don't know. Yeah, I think I like it. You did a good job. Thanks. Have you toured in Ireland yet? No. You've got to wait.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Yeah, sorry. What are we talking about? I'm brand new. Yeah, I shouldn't have said that.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Yeah, the South, it's more—the South has more of that kind of slave magic history.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
No, you're great to talk to, Grace O'Malley. I love, I'm glad I've gotten to sit and chat with you. If you guys don't know Grace, now you probably do. I think you have a good, I think, did we talk about your life enough, do you think? Yeah, sure. Okay. Yeah. Oh, did you finish college or not?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
The Irish need it. What are the Irish missing? There's always that thing, you know?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
good yeah why can't they do it well sharing a beer in silence that's that's also supposed to be love in their eyes really yeah yeah why do the irish have that trouble sharing love maybe and if if people listen they can hit the hotline too with that 985-664-9503 and that would be great to just i want to examine that next time we have a solo episode is why the irish have that trouble expressing their love do you think that they have it more than other cultures
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
No, they can't. Tough? Is it tough love? Or is it just no love? Well, there's a video. You see that? I think Steve... Look up Stevie Weeby. He just put that video of him, Bobby, and their mother trying to do Christmas together or something. Can you see that if you put it on his Instagram? The Koreans, I don't think they can do it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
The mother is very endearing. I would love to meet her. She's probably a star that I would like to meet.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Oh, I don't know. I got to meet Mel Gibson one time, and he was very captivating.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
It's very, like, you get drawn into him, you know?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Tuscaloosa, Tallahassee, Winnipeg, and Calgary, Alberta in the Canada. Get all your tickets at theovon.com slash T-O-U-R. Make sure to go through that site. And thank you so much for your support. That'll still be the Return of the Rat Tour.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Um, yep. Yeah? Yeah, I did get to one time, which is crazy because Patriot's my favorite movie, probably. Uh, was there anything else that we wanted to talk about? You have any of our topics, anything you want to look at really quick? I'm just trying to think grace for, I'll let you go. Oh wait. So your new podcast, tell me about it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
So what are you looking for in your coast? Do you already have a parameters?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Will she have a say in it? Will you have a say in it? Will it just be, is it up to you?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Yeah, I think just trust your instincts. Yeah. Whatever your instincts are, I love them. Thanks.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
They're fun. Your instincts are fun to ride along with. The Down for Anything Tour that's going on right now.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
You know what's so funny about comedy? A lot of times you'd be on stage and it's all dates there. And so you're like, so not only are you like the kind of like, if you're the lonely one, if you're the one that doesn't have a boyfriend or girlfriend, then you're also provide, you're the entertainment, right? They're paying for sure.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
But then they all have, and then you're like, oh, it just builds up this. Sometimes they can build up this weird fucking resentment.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
This is fun. And what do you do then? You throw a couple fingers in the hoo-ha? What do you do at that point?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
There you are, Gracie. Yeah. We're going to fucking, we're going to send some cacks your way this year, Gracie, baby. Yeah. We're going to send you a boatload of cacks.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Your dad might hear this, okay. And why do they say quack up there in mass? Quack.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Yeah, dude. I was going in. I had a show right outside of Medford. I don't know where it is. Is that right outside of the city?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
And I had a show right out there. And some guy's walking up with his wife. They're eating a piece of pizza. And he's like, Doris, that's the guy. We're going to give him your pizza. Give him your pizza. And Doris, they're both eating. You can tell they just got a snack. They're running over. They're running a few minutes late. I'm like, don't give me. He's like, give me a fucking pizza, Doris.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
You fucking bitch. So now, yeah. I love this guy. Yeah, that's how he is.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Yeah, you're fucking like I want to see him, Doris. So Doris gives me her pizza and then they go inside.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Oh, definitely. Just to get a whiff of Pedroia's fucking... Catch his mitt. Yeah. All right. I think we've had enough. I think we've had a good start to the year. Any res, anything that you're trying to push on yourself this year? I know maybe love is in the air. That's always in the air.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Anything else you're kind of like? Is there a real goal that you have or something this year?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Oh, so you're tapping back in. So for the rest of January, you're off.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
In Holland, I think. Yeah, they're behind. Yeah, it's like.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
I'm on Holland time. Okay. What about you? What about me? No, I'm going to try to be sober all year, I think. But any New Year's resolution?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
I'm going to try to be more pertinent with my time.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Like, don't waste time in things that I know. Like, I think with relationship stuff, don't waste, like, dating time in things that maybe don't have a chance kind of thing.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Yeah, just – if I know it's not really there, don't just kind of use the situation just because maybe I'm lonesome or something. Yeah. Or like don't – or just because I don't have anybody to go do – just be like, well, just do shit by myself then. So no, just be by myself or whatever.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Why would a guy who's not even dead come and help you? That's nice of him.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
And then, I don't know, get out there and fucking do some sex maybe. I don't know. Something else. I don't know. I'd like to read a little bit more maybe this year.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Not as much as I'd have liked. But just because I want to have that slow time because your thoughts are slowed down and you're just kind of relaxing. I feel like my brain gets so sped up.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Yeah, slow it down and maybe pray if I meet a wife or something. 2020 wife, that's where I'm at.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
It could happen, dude. That's good. I like that. Welcome to cum country, huh?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Doris. Grace O'Malley, thank you so much for coming. Nora O'Malley, thank you for coming, too. And cheers and blessings to you guys. Happy New Year.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
And same for me. And best of luck with Disgraceful. It comes out in February?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Yeah, dude, being electrocuted, it's kind of under, it's not a, it's a, it doesn't get as much credit as it deserves, really. I got got once by electricity.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
No, when I was at a fair or something, I was, we used to go to the carnival down the street from our home or whatever. And they had, they would let you ride the rides the day before the fair opened up.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
yeah nice so we're out there and um and we're doing it or whatever and they were just like plugging shit in and whatever and ever you know and i would try to get off one of the rides and i like grabbed two different railings and i think i connected some circuit or whatever it's always just like this oh shit did your friends see a skeleton like the cartoons no uh i don't know my friends they kind of ran off to like oh something's you know this isn't
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Yeah, this guy's not doing good. We don't want to be involved in it. And some guy called me, I think, a f**k or whatever and kicked me in the back. Nice. And I was like, okay, he saved my life, but he still called me a f**k. So it was like, well, you know, but that's what you get kind of around the carnival.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
But that time, and then I was walking behind a food truck that was serving crab meat or whatever, which I don't trust.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Yeah. I don't trust crab meat that's that close to a gas tank, I think.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
You're as smooth... There's Tennessee shellfish. Yeah, that's wild, dude.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
That's that new money shit. That's new money, boy. That's fucking new money, dude. Yeah, let's give him the crab legs. This baby's getting a grill and we're getting fucking Tennessee crab legs.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
um i'm trying to think of shit that we got like that are that yeah what was your what was your first new money buy oh i got a fucking cyber truck was the only thing i've ever really gotten for myself that was like expensive somebody was telling me about that and they were saying that you thought that nobody would recognize you in that thing oh yeah that's what i thought it yeah i didn't think it was that big of a deal i thought everybody would have them you know
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
and that's gonna make people do many double takes oh it was once at the car second at you yeah it was horrible sorry once at you second for the car no it was all horrible because well whenever you first got them i got home i ordered like five years ago right like it was because it was a hundred bucks oh that's like putting it on the wish list okay right so for a hundred bucks you could be like i got a cyber truck coming it was online it was just a layaway yes that's rich people layaway
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Today's guest is an entertainer out of the Boston and New England areas of America, and I got to see her backstage the other night when she was performing stand-up here in Nashville, Tennessee. She got her start with Barstool Sports, and I've been a fan, and I'm looking forward to get to learn more about her. Today's guest is Miss Grace O'Malley.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
So I was like, yeah, I'm getting a Cybertruck or whatever. And then I kept like bothering Elon on Twitter. Where are they? You know, give them, you know.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
No, I don't know him. I was just tweeting at him and stuff or like, you know, saying stuff like that. And then finally one day I got home. I'd been out of town for a few weeks and it was in my garage.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Yeah. And so I was like, holy shit, dude. And at first when you would drive down the street, people would like, there were people cheering, people had American flags. There were Mexican people out there doing this and dancing or whatever.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
You're like, where did these Mexican people come from, you know? Ole, ole, ole. And you were just driving, but really they had like, we are the champions. It was like gay people. People were coming out of the closet in front of you. You had girls flashing titties. It was a lot. Yeah, it was just a lot going on, you know? And yeah, I did it. I thought it automatically would have...
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
extra darkness on the windows you know and it didn't so for a long time i thought it was like it obviously it's i can't you know i can just drop you know there was extra darkness and then and then um my buddy was like you got to get those things tinted i was like oh shit man they're not tinted and then so finally i did get them tinted well uh what was it run dmc or the or
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Oh yeah, somebody just did that, huh? Yeah, bring that up, dude. Actually, you know what's funny? I thought about getting like a big fuse and putting it like hanging out of mine.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Oh, he did it for 4th of July? He did it for New Year's?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Don't come ask me. But the problem is the horn sounds a little bit effeminate, too.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Yeah. If you hit the horn, a couple gay dudes will kind of walk over. Like, oh, hi.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
Do they? Yeah. Not here. They don't have to anymore, right? Where are streetwalkers still in America? Can you pull that up, please?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E553 Grace O'Malley
I think that they, yeah, definitely. I mean, there's like Italian guys, if that's what you're talking about. Gross. But I don't know what you're looking at overall. Nevada has the largest commercial sex market in the United States when adjusted for population.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
Right here, we've got some new, new tour dates to tell you about. I'll be in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania on July the 9th. Rochester, New York on July the 10th. And Detroit, Michigan on July 11th and 12th at the Fox Theater. As well, we have shows upcoming in Miami, Cedar Rapids, St. Paul, Fargo, Rapid City... Winnipeg, and Calgary. You can get all your tickets at theovon.com slash T-O-U-R.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
This is a fucking waiting game. Waiting for Gal Gadot. Have you seen that movie, that play?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
But they were cool, but they would have nothing and they would do so many. It would look like that Indian holiday or whatever. You know, the one where like suddenly you see this bunch of Indian people crossing the street who look like they got attacked by like an Easter, like a Easter chalkboard or something, you know? Like you don't talk about.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
Yeah, like it was Easter Sunday and LeBron was just firing off right in front of him.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
Sometimes you got, hey, you know what a police officer told me one time? He said that they'll show up in a place with a bunch of murders and you'll see police officers stand outside laughing because it's a thing that happens to people when stuff's painful. Yeah, it's so serious. He says they do it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
Dude, well, the reason we brought you here is because you have a comedy special coming out, man. Oh, yeah, that's right. First of all, thank you for coming, dude.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
Waiting for Gal Gadot. It's like a new – it's a female take on – No, it's not. You haven't seen that?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
You've been drinking tomato juice or something? Mm-hmm. Remember when V8 was the only healthy thing?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
Oh, dude, yeah. And rich guys would pour it in their engine or whatever as well. And some people would pour it in their butt. Yeah, some like really rich guys would pour it in their butt.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
But like who drank it? I think like a mom would drink it if they were healthy or they were trying to make a baby or whatever.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
You, me, and also your- Jody. Jody. Yeah. And also- The comedian, famous comedian. Oh, Dennis. And Dennis Miller all the way one time. That was hilarious.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
Oh, I would wait on her. No, it's a book. Waiting on Gadot, that one. It's a book that her assistant wrote.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
I even showed him a video of yours from one of your movies. And he laughed. That's funny. And he's like, oh, it kind of looked like him, but not him. UFC 315 will be on the TV. The snacks and the beverages will be ready to go. The best way to make that one-two combo even better is by trying to win some real cash with Pick 6 from DraftKings, the official daily fantasy sports partner of UFC.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
Waiting on Rachel Zegler. Dude, well, what happened? They didn't put – what happened with that whole thing? They didn't put little people in it, right, first? Is that what happened? Oh, in Snow White? Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
As well, they got Bilal Bully B. Muhammad out there. against Jack Della Maddalena. You can make your picks there with DraftKings Pick 6. Don't settle for a smaller payout. Switch to Pick 6 and cash in your UFC knowledge. Play $5, get $50 in bonus picks instantly on your first entry. Pick six from DraftKings is the most fun way to play fantasy sports.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
Yeah, recently I was paying for something, butcher bargain, or I don't know what it was, something. Just a monthly meat deal where they sending you meat. And I didn't know I was still paying for it. And it was at my old address. So somebody over there is just eating my bacon. Somebody over there is just slurping up on my sirloin cuts that I was paying for. Rocket Money is a personal finance app.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
Cancel your unwanted subscriptions and reach your financial goals faster with Rocket Money. Download the Rocket Money app and enter our show name this past weekend with Theo Vaughn in the survey so they know I sent you. Don't wait. Download the Rocket Money app today and tell them you heard about them from our show.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
I want to let you know there's a growing expense eating into your company's profits. It's your cloud computing bill. You may have gotten a deal to start, but now the spend is sky high and increasing every year. What if you could cut your cloud bill in half and improve performance at the same time? Well, if you act by May 31st, Oracle Cloud Infrastructure can help you do just that.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
Because you show that clip in your show, right? Yeah, we showed it during the halftime or towards the end of the show.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
Did they really? They were excited. Oh, that's awesome. They write your show. Oh, that's cool. It's been well-received by people. Just people getting to see the – It's a good little window into it. See the trailer for Busboys. Yeah, I'm trying to think. What do you think is the toughest part now having kind of put a movie together from the beginning?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
So we're bus boys. So anyway, you have to give you just long enough to polish the gun that you have in your trailer. And then before you can use it on yourself, you're like, Hey, we need you back on set.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
Because, you know, people don't know. They just watch it. Oh, yeah. I mean, that's the scariest part. I feel like it's trying to just like see before you show it, somebody is like, is what I think makes sense here make sense to other people? Right, because we know it. We're too close to it. Yeah, I think it gets weird.
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#580 - David Spade
What do you feel like was one of the funnest days that we had?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
That was kind of fun because there's a lot of people.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
Yeah. When there's a lot of people, it's fun. We kept having to go up and down that ladder like Ninja Turtles. Remember that? That was in like a condemned building that –
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
Well, yeah. Well, I think they also, I think it got pretty DEI here too, which is fine, but it's like, if they were white, like,
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
Yeah. Yeah. That was great. Just getting to see him. He has a new special that just came out too. Oh yeah. Yeah. Yeah. No, he's great. You just have a, you have a comedy special. Oh yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
Yeah. Is it his first guy? Yeah. I mean I think his wife left him. He hasn't been doing well. He's standing all – yeah. His wife kicked him out. It's rude. And first of all, that's Friar Tuck who they obviously just repurposed from Robin Hood. So that's not cool.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
That's, oh no, you're great, dude. It looks great. You look very healthy in that. It reminds me of David Duchovny. Yeah. A little bit. And the guy from, that guy from, that guy, his partner on the TV show. Yeah. What am I talking about? Shrek? No. Go ahead. Who am I talking about? It's like, the guy's got all the kids. Tim. Tim the Toolman Taylor. That's him.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
You look like Galbor, like the dude that gets the gals.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
Yeah, screw him, Sean. What's that, Playgirl magazine? Look at him.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
It's the exact – And who is that? That's like 49ers quarterback that's – Yeah. Throws a park, that guy, what's his name?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
Dude, that's – I don't think you have to – I mean it's like – I haven't done a special I'm thinking four years now. Yeah, you don't need it. If we do it this year, it'll be four years. But also I've been on the same tour for years. But it's like there's so many places you can go. It's like I don't mind going to a town that has 30,000 people in it. You know, it's like –
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
You cannot do it and probably have a family and stuff like that and have pets you own.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
Or semi-owned. God owns them. As long as they have a 30,000 seat theater, then you can. But it's like, but if we can go over there, I think I'd rather do it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
Jotar, it's 69 Charger Daytona. It's fucking cool though.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
Can you read? Yeah, one of the funniest scenes depicts Joe Dirt at the impound lot, financially unstable to retrieve his Mint 67 Plymouth Hemi GTX convertible. He's buying the Charger Daytona instead. You bought it for $450 in the movie, apparently. Oh, $450 in the movie. Oh, I didn't see the movie. Do we know the closing price on that? Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
You're like, hey, go sit in and just turn it on for me. I want to hear it. No, I just go, I miss her, man. I miss her. Just put her on the phone. He's like, mail me some semen. And you're like, oh, I don't miss her that much. No, I do that. I'll do that. I'll do that once. Do you think, would you guys ever have done a Tommy Boy 2? Do you think you and Farley ever would have done it?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
Yeah, there's your boy right there. And who's the last guy at the end of the line? That is... That guy? No.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
Yeah, yeah, obviously to have him be alive. But do you think that you would have been able to do a Tommy Boy? Yes, in all these scenarios, he's alive. You're like, it'd be great. No, if he's alive, you have to add that caveat. If you had to do Tommy Boy 2, what would the plot even have gone into, you think? Tommy Boy 2, Electric Boogaloo.
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#580 - David Spade
enough to sell a movie. People wouldn't listen now.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
Maybe menstrual pads you could have gone to. That's not a bad idea. Yeah. That we go sell them. Stop the flow. Yeah. That's like, things are getting out of hand. Maybe women's lib was getting crazy. Yeah. And then he dresses like one parking lot. He was like, okay, my mom, the crazy, some big woman comes. He goes, let me try it out.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
These are cut scenes from our possible movie, yeah. Did you ever do a Farley impersonation or no? Who are you?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
It's like, well, I guess people didn't like it. And then Minecraft came along and beat the fucking shit out of it. Well, so Snow White, it should be about the fentanyl problem, huh?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
I think you connected us maybe. I was like – John. Yeah, John. John, yeah. Johnny Farley and I was like – And he hadn't been back, dude, since – He hadn't been back since Chris was there. Did he hit you up to go there or did I tell you guys to go or were you just in New York? He took advantage of us, I think. But whatever – oh, no. I think you said to me, hey, he's going to be there.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
So tell him hello. But he hit you up to get him in there.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
I'd never been. Yeah. What was it like? It was interesting to see what you – the place you guys had all been at and what kind of like – There's photos everywhere. Yeah. Just what it was like. Like I think I pictured it more of like an old school type of dormitory vibe. But – But our offices were up higher. Oh, then maybe it was up there. Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
I don't know. It depends on who the musical guest is, I guess.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
Oh, did we park in front of you? Yeah. He was nice, dude. He knew you from – Yeah, him and Bunny came over. I remember that. That was cool. Dude, that was awesome. That was like – I think he had come out here to do Jimmy Kimmel or something. It was like one of his first times being out here. Right, right, right. And then we saw Luke Bryan at dinner. We see all your little goat roper buddies. Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
Dude, that was fun. Yeah, he came over. That's when we used to have a good time, man. Yeah. What happened? Now we're just grinding on the movie every day going, oh. I know. Now we're just like, how do we fuck? Tra la la. Yeah, dude, that was fun, huh? I remember that. I was excited. Luke frickin' Bryan, remember that?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
We're like, dude, we're supposed to come sit with you.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
God, look how good. You look definitely like one of those rich people's dogs. I do. For sure, dude. Now I see why your mom makes you come home a lot. She's like, I need this little cute puff right here in my lap. Look at that.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
Solid choice. And there's Luke. Looks like he just... Fucking Luke, he's like, that does look like me. I'm a bit of a lap dog. Yeah, you look like you spent time at NYU a little bit. I'll fucking gnaw on a snossage. Shit, look at you, dirt. Oh, just dumb. Just like, how did I even get here? What are we eating, fucking oysters or something? Oh my God. Jeez, what a bunch of idiots.
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#580 - David Spade
Somebody ordered that little, when they put those little, the shrimp, they put them upstairs like they're about to commit suicide or whatever. That little, it's like a little shrimp rack or whatever. Yeah. Like the second story shrimp, they hide them all on the edge of, like they're trying to hide from, it's like, bitch, we see you. They're all naked though. Look at those fucking shrimps.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
Dude, don't you watch fishing shows? You have filet of... Soul? Soul? Oh, how rich. Can we pull it up, see if it's real? You're eating human spirit in there?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
Yeah. And you get the head and the tail or they just give you the middle part? No, you should. That's crazy. You should come to my house and fucking clean my car. Yeah. Dude, that's crazy. 150 bucks for one piece of fish? Unreal. Yeah. That would never fly in the Bible, dude. No. No. No.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
Yeah. Somebody's getting a little bit of tartar sauce on the inside. Gobble that goo. Yeah. It's not in the Bible either. God. You can have better sex with Blue Chew. Blue Chew is the original brand offering chewable tablets for better sex. That's it. That's how it is. And starting now, Blue Chew is offering a combo so strong it'll knock your socks off and your neighbor's socks off.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
Try your first month of Blue Chew free. When you use promo code Theo, just pay $5 shipping. That's promo code T-H-E-O. Visit bluechew.com for more details and important safety information. And we thank Blue Chew for sponsoring the podcast. This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Mental health is, it's our new Vietnam, guys, really. It's right in front of us every day.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
It's just making sure you're okay. We're locked in. We're in a unique time where we're, I don't know if we're transitioning from humans to computers. I don't know what's going on. But you got to take care of the main frame that God gave you, your brain. 26% of Americans who participated in a recent study say they have avoided seeking mental health support due to fear of judgment. Man.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
Look, if I meet you, if I know you, you better be getting mental health support. You better be stay on top of your brain. BetterHelp has over 10 years of experience matching people with the right therapist from their diverse network of more than 30,000 licensed therapists with a wide range of specialties. We are all better with help.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
Visit BetterHelp.com slash T-H-E-O to get 10% off your first month. That's BetterHelp, H-E-L-P.com slash Theo. Whenever you pass away.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
Dude, first of all, I'm a BLM advocate. So I get a lot of my stuff.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
No, AI. That's G-A-I, dude. That's horrible, bro. That's G-A-Y, yeah. The forearms are nice, though.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
No, you look good there. Well, thanks. Why can't you look more like A.I.? Well. Well. Do you think, whenever you die, where do you want your body, where do you want your ashes spread, do you think?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
What if they had like spade shades and we put them into some beautiful, beautiful sunglasses?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
Ashes. All of mine shot into a fucking schoolyard full of children.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
No, wasn't there a story about some dog that ate someone's ashes or something? Was there anything else? There was something in the news that was happening about it. Someone eating ashes. We got that? Did you hear that bullshit?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
Thank you so much for the support. Today's guest is a legendary comedian and actor. He's a friend of mine. He's probably my closest friend in Hollywood. I'll say that. We're out of that area, you know. I just feel blessed to know him. He's got a new special, Dandelion, streaming now on Prime Video. You know his classic movies, Tommy Boy, Black Sheep, Joe Dirt. This guy's got a big heart.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
UK mom walked into an unthinkable situation when she found her one-year-old consuming her father's cremated remains. And she even has video of the mortifying situation.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
That's so grody. That lady's complaining. Also, the kid is a ginger too.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
Yeah. So something that you got to see coming. Something that's on you. Also, the lady immediately sold it to TMZ. That's a great point, huh? Yeah. She probably served them up. Everything's for sale nowadays, it seems like. What other news stories we got, guys? Anything popping off? Yeah, give us some shit before Spade fucking has to bug you.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
Yeah, you might want to see the final act. Yeah, because they've... It's hard to keep hair.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
Who's Brian Johnson? Let's take a look at him first.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
Flying in bed. Just like Brian Johnson did. There he is. Oh, there he is, huh? First of all, I thought this was Matt Rife. Is that his new special?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
What is this guy injecting in his wiener this week? I know that's the only thing. This guy takes a lot of pills straight up the wee-wee. Listen, I'm all for doing...
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
Yeah, you don't want somebody who's in there sandblasting their fucking clavicles in the morning. You can't even get any extra sleep.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
That's a tough part. Whoa. That's me when I get all the surgery and you go, Spade, is that you? JonBenet Pico-Gramsey, huh?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
Dude, what the fuck? You better spend that money, David.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
Why does he got band-aids on his finger? What's wrong with this dude? And why has he got a half ounce of raspberry cum on him?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
Wow, is that a Neuralink necklace around his head? Shave your chest, you fruitcake. God, that guy's been eating his own nipples off, I bet.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
Dude, that's crazy. I don't know. How long would you want to be alive, you think? Be honest.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
You didn't want to get in there. They had the ice bath too.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
Dude, the cars, we had to push the cars into every shop.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
But it was like, we got two brothers right here that'll push it for like 80 bucks. And we're like, what?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
Yeah. I was like, I don't care if they're related or not. I'm like, just like, well, we have two guys that aren't related. That'll do it for 120.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
Yeah, thanks for doing it, man. For sure. It was definitely really interesting to get to do. I can't even – it just – yeah, you learn so much stuff. You're like, Jesus.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
I'm like – Yeah. We have to give a soft spot in your heart for everything. Yeah. For having to do stuff. Yeah. It's just definitely, man. It's life. We're being alive. No, dude. We're just talking about it. It's fucking life. Yeah, life. Everything isn't like – I think people don't think that everything is just complete magic or whatever, you know?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
That's all. Especially when you start watching a movie and you're like, this movie fucking sucks. And then they're like. And then you don't even think. You're like, these fucking idiots got together every day and made it. That even blows your fucking mind. Oh, they made it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
I don't need a DNA test to watch that. You know what I'm saying? You know, and stepbrother porn, I'll tell you, and then I got to get out of here. Yeah, tell me about one of your favorite things about it. Oh, is this a thing? Oh, sperm racing.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
Sperm racing, a new sport. That's KTLA 5, yeah. Sperm racing, a new sport has come to Los Angeles. You read that right. A startup recently announced the launch of the world's first live sperm race. You'll be able to watch its inaugural edition. Does everyone get a microscope? Right here in Los Angeles. I don't know. Let me see.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
The startup known simply as Sperm Racing raised a million dollars in support of their efforts to put on the world's first sperm race.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
Well, son. Oh, look at the chart. That really helps me. So now you're jerking off. You just tell your dad I'm staying competitive out here. Now you might be wondering how exactly a sperm race works. Well, the founders laid it out. First, a microscopic racetrack for the two sperm samples to compete on will be constructed.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
The course mimics reproductive system and includes chemical signals, fluid dynamics, and synchronized starts. Is this for the next Olympics? What are we doing? Thank God, dude. I don't know because I'm tired of just jerking off and nobody wins. How about this? I'll get the fucking high jump and that's about it. Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
Yeah, no, I don't even whack off. Mine's more like, it looks like a couple guys just rolling out of a sleeping bag these days.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
Oh, I'm working with an eyedropper these days, that's for sure.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
That's pretty much it. One more news topic before you go, David. Yeah, the two guys that play lose.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
Yeah, Georgia 9-11 caller here is dispatcher ordering McGriddle during emergency call. Oh, I hate this kind of stuff. I just say when the lines get crossed or whatever, you ever do that? What do you mean? Oh, like a party line? Oh, when I was a kid. Yeah. Like when I was a kid or whatever, you'd be talking to your friend and then it would cross over and you'd just have some big guy's voice.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
It's like, these are going to die. You're like, who was that?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
And you just said a line. You've never even heard the voice before. Like the line would get crossed. And I just stepped out.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
A 911 caller in Chatham County, Georgia, had a very hard time getting through to dispatchers when he thought someone was breaking into his home. Classic Chatham County problem. Just some good old breakfast. When he finally did get through, he said the dispatcher was ordering breakfast. My wife called me. Oh, we got a live report. Go ahead.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
That lady looks like her mom a little spade. She looks like a reptilian. Yeah, never mind. Your mom looks sweet. No, my mom's hot.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
Oh yeah. Dude, I was a busboy for, how long were you a busboy for? Probably two years.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
Dude, she does look like the lady. Dude, your mom likes jade, so does my mom. Oh, jade? Oh, that's turquoise. But she wears a lot of jade and she wears a lot of turquoise. Oh, yeah, turquoise, dude. Desert jade. Yeah. No, she loves it. That sand jade, they call it, you know, in some circles. Look at me with makeup on. God. Does your mom have a good sense of humor? She's the best.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
Yeah, she's hysterical. My mom looks like Willie Nelson bringing up Pitcher Upper.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
Dude, she likes it. Ever since RFK Jr. cleaned up some of their feeding patterns over there. Do you have syrup? That was overheard. We're going to start using owl piss. Yeah. Did you hear about the guy that tried to piss in his pool or something? No, some guy was leaving piss somewhere and they hit him with a hammer. What was that article I saw with that hammer, dude?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
I don't know if that's the whole story. What was that article I saw with the hammer, dude? Oh, my God.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
We should have started with this one. I like this one. Or why? It's a lot of pee. A man has no idea who's putting gallons of urine in his recycling bin. Or why?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
TBD, dude. It's a little late to be thinking about the plot. Dude, the best thing was that we got to sing The Beatles. That was the best thing, I think.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
Hit that like and subscribe button. Yeah, whatever it is. You guys, one of the greats. Yeah. One of the funniest people I've ever met, man. I feel lucky to be able to know you, and I really feel lucky that you came over today, man. Just thanks for... Making us laugh, dude. I love it, dude. You always crack me up. All right, guys. See you out there.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
Well, that was like the original Viagra, I think, was like you'd have to pull your carver and put a quart of oil in it, you know? Yeah. But the rev of the engine would keep everybody possible. I'm sorry. Yeah, maybe. It would keep you sexually possible, you know? But then now it's like, dude, you have people literally drinking oil and blue chews or whatever.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
It's like it's all on the responsibility of the man.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
Oh, you'll see. You can't even get a kid's diaper off because he's all winged up. He's rotted up. Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
Sometimes like you'll go to the dad, you'll be like that. Yeah, good job, dude. But nothing crazy. And they're not big. It's nothing you can keep a spare key on or anything.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
Yeah, I don't get them. I don't get a lot of like man-made boners or whatever they're called anymore. I get mine. Yeah, there's some. Power Zen, Vicious Pussy Serpent.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
I'll tell you that. And one of the biggest senses of humor that exists. I'm happy to welcome back today's guest, Mr. David Spade. All right, we ready? We ready?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
Yeah. Actually, this is kind of merged with like the Fireworks Circuit. I think these things and fireworks are so close to being – just compatible.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
Dude, I heard a story that you, that we had, we just had a bus driver when we were doing touring for standup. Yeah. And he was, either he or his brother had driven you. And one time you stopped at a firework stand and went in and did your Joe Dirt bit. Is that true?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
Yeah, when they have real dynamite, that's not fireworks anymore. No, it gets in a different area. Yeah, like you should join a labor union.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
Yeah, we had, I'm trying to think, the craziest were fire don't works, like the ones where you'd light them and it would just come out the other side, or you would light them and then your stepdad would call your mom a whore and just drive off. You're like, how is this even connected? Oh, yeah, yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
Oh, is this a... Fireworks at Coachella misfires and hits area near a crowd of people and sets tree on fire. Oh, I think this was part of MGK's outfit. This part of his outfit?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
Oh, they should make the fireworks when you light them and then they only hit a pedophile when they take off. Yeah, pedophile chasers.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
Did you see the guy who fell in the water the other day? No. Bring up that guy who they paid – they earned him like $300 or $400 to get into the water of like a flash flood basically. No, I'm sure he's dead. It was a beautiful young man. I don't know how he's doing. See if you can find that, dude. Yeah, while we're doing that.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#580 - David Spade
The craziest was like, the saddest was we had a guy by us, a dad, and he was like... Just like barely a day. He was like kind of like a whimsical kind of dad. Like wish he'd never probably been married to a, and I'm going to say this fast so I don't sound like sexist or anything, woman, you know? And he would only get his kids smoke bombs. So they would light like a million smoke bombs.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
Today's guest is one of the biggest content creators in the world. He's an entrepreneur, a YouTube guru, and he has created more energy and excitement into the world of giving back than possibly anyone. He has a new show called Beast Games where a record-breaking 1,000 people compete for the largest prize in entertainment history, $5 million.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
I kind of realized how many game shows are missing so many little elements in there where they could manipulate the situation more or create more of an environment for like competitors in the game to make choices that would affect them and others, you know? Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
But it was like... So, yeah, that guy could have given us a lot more.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
But I'm just saying, it's like everybody has a game show, and you're like, yeah, people, these prizes are cheap, you know? That's kind of what I was getting at. Anyway, we can take that part out.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
We had a dude in our area, I'll be honest with you, he'd give you $10, he'd walk off a little bit, he'd kind of spread his butt a little bit, and you had to kind of go like that at him, and you got the money, you know? Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
So, but it wasn't, it wasn't close up and it wasn't even super invasive. It was like, you know, I get it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
I was old enough to be like, Hey, this guy's kind of a crazy guy, you know, but he's also cheap, you know, so probably 13, 12, 11, you know, but anyway, you sure you don't want to file a police report?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
Yeah, you're right, actually. And maybe that's the type of game we can go to do next is trapping guys like that, you know? $12 butt games. That's different.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
anyway i shouldn't have said anything like that um just so our viewers know right i know you have the largest youtube channel um that that exists the most that they can have on there um you have more subscribers than i think people in america uh yeah i haven't thought of that but yeah population of america i think sorry to cut you off to me like 300 million right
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
Yeah. And you get, well, you get to a point also with popularity where you've also gone, Oh, you can't go back. First of all, you can't unbeast yourself.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
Yeah, no, I think there's different ways to do different little disguises. I do think it's interesting what you're saying, though, like about like I would notice this is just for me, but I would notice like someone would pay for my food sometime at a restaurant.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
But then I would read like, oh, he didn't thank us for it. So really they were paying for it. So I would like engage with them, right? Which is, it's okay. But it's like, at some point it's like, maybe I'm due with friends.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
Yeah, I'd rather just pay for my food. I didn't know that there was this other exchange to it, right? So I'm not complaining. I'm happy for the extra food, but if I'm in a hurry or something and now I'm in a different spot and now I'm in a conversation where somebody also then wants to ask you about a business thing or something, it's like-
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
Yeah, well, it's just interesting, you know? And people will be like, oh, famous people complaining, you know? But it's like, but if popularity is a blessing and a curse, and sometimes it's a side effect of what you even wanted to do, right? And yeah, and then there's also ways to like, little things to navigate amongst it. This episode is sponsored by BAM. Prize picks, baby.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
Do you love firing on sports? Do you love it? I do. Well, PrizePix is the best daily fantasy sports app for you. You can sign up today and get $50 instantly when you play $5. That's it. It's simple. You can fire on all your favorite sports like the NBA, NFL, UFC, and many more. Instead of choosing teams, what I love about PrizePix is that you choose individual players. Eh, player?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
You know, you said there's a lot of world records that were broken in the in the shooting of the of this series.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
Each player has a set projection, and you either choose more or less than that set projection. PrizePix also has a brand new feature called Live Squares, available now. Live Squares allows you to pick a player's full game projection after their time has started. so you can get in the game. The projection changes based on the player's live progress.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
Look for the red dot indicating a game is in progress. If you are smart with sports and you know what players are going to perform on what nights, PrizePix is the best app for you. I enjoy it. If you can gamble responsibly, PrizePix is it. First-time users download the PrizePix app, use code Theo, and PrizePix will instantly give you $50 on your first lineup of $5 or more, no strings attached.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
Put in $5 and instantly get a free $50. And make sure this is something that you are able to use responsibly. If not, then it's not for you. But if so, then PrizePix is the best app for you. This episode is sponsored by Kraken. the number one ranked crypto platform by Forbes in November, 2024. That's the kind of crack I like. Bitcoin's been on a tear lately.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
And if you've been thinking about getting some of that digital gold, Kraken is the place to be. Look, you don't have to be some kind of tech wizard or some fancy Nancy to use Kraken. Signing up is quick and free. And their app is so easy to use, even your Uncle Terry could figure it out after a couple of cold boys.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
You can also set up your own personal watch list of crypto charts to keep tabs on the price of Bitcoin and over 190 other cryptos. Hold up, let me check the Bitcoin price on Kraken real quick. Dang, she's rippin'. Everybody's asking where to buy crypto, and the answer is simple. Get Kraken, K-R-A-K-E-N. Head to kraken.com slash Theo. That's www.kraken.com slash T-H-E-O. And sign up now.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
That's kraken.com slash Theo. Disclaimer, not investment advice. Crypto trading involves risk of loss and is offered to U.S. customers, excluding Washington, New York, and Maine, through Payword Interactive, Inc. See Kraken.com legal-ca-pru-disclaimer for info on Kraken's undertaking to register in Canada. Let's be honest. What most people want for the holidays is to see their loved ones.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
That's what we want most of the time. We want to see our loved ones. We want to see even a picture of them, if that's all. That's why this year the best gift you can give, besides plane tickets, is an Aura digital picture frame.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
Named the number one digital picture frame by Wirecutter, Aura frames are incredibly smart and easy to use, allowing you to upload unlimited photos and videos directly from your phone to the frame. Plus, you can order the frame online and preload it with photos and videos using the Aura app, A-U-R-A app. So it's ready to go right out of the box. Yep. I know I've got one for my family member.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
Somebody's getting one. And if they like it, then I'll see about maybe if we get them all. Then everybody can upload different things and we'll have a beautiful variety of things going on there. Save on the perfect gift by visiting oraframes.com to get $35 off best-selling Carver mat frames by using promo code Theo at checkout. That's A-U-R-A frames.com, promo code T-H-E-O.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
This deal is exclusive to listeners, so get yours now in time for the holidays. Terms and conditions apply. Um, how did you become, just so our listeners know, how did you become Mr. Beast? You know, were you, were you, was there at a point where you were just a beast and was there?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
So they gave you, did they ever come after you and try to claim any title to it?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
Yeah. Oh, that's the most people probably since 9-11, I would think.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
We might have to take that out. Yeah. And I shouldn't have said that. I'll say something else. Yeah. I haven't seen that many people. Yeah. at the same time.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
Watching somebody semi-unconscious count their way through the 80,000 is unbelievable.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
There are other moments in that where you're like, yeah, somebody helped this guy or something, you know?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
Was it hard to learn to reinvest in yourself? Is that like a, I know you kind of mentioned a minute ago, was that like a thing? Is it hard to learn to reinvest?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
So you want to make the best video. There's something about it that you want to make the best video.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
Just had to use the, yeah, I had already, I'd already soiled the conversation. Oh, that's the most people at once that I'd seen since, oh, since I was in the parking lot of a widespread panic concert, you know, but that was LSD. That kind of works a little.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
Yeah, I mean, that, yeah, watching, I mean, I know this will be on Amazon, right?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
But watching some of your stuff, it's just like, man, this is, like, fantastical, you know? It's, like, fantasy. There's fantasy parts of it. What was one you guys just put up about you went out into these, like, like this cave and- Seven days in the underground cave? Was it a real cave or not a real cave?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
It was so great because it's like, it mixes like past and present. It's like, I can't, it's like- are we the Mayans or the aliens here? There's this mix of like, you know, is this a real city? Is it not? It looks brand new, but then it's also has these- Well, and the Romans used to mine salt out of there.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
Yeah, that's a part to it. That's one that it's just like, I can't tell sometimes when it's new or old or it's like, it's just, it's fantastical. You know, that's what it feels like to me. It felt like, dang, this is dang fantasy, you know? So you're a Mr. Beast. Is there a Mrs. Beast? Do they have a Mrs. Beast?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
Okay. So you just call her by her natural name or whatever God-given name. Do you remember your first girlfriend ever or no?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
Okay. Oh yeah, yeah. That's what I was just, or yeah, I was just thinking like, were you good at having girl? Like, was there ever a girl that you even had a crush on in your neighborhood or anything when you were a kid?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
Uh, yeah. I keep saying, didn't it kill? It didn't kill Jessica Simpson. What happened to her? And that wasn't her, sorry. Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
That's a great point. You make the choices, man. Yeah, do you feel like this wizard? Because as I'm watching, I'm like, man, there's so many things. I'm like, where does the motivation come from? Is it to... Like, do you get so...
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
Like when people with that worm rod in the ground, you ever seen that when they electrocute the ground to get the worms out of it?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
Dude, we had to get this blotter. They had something. There was this. Finally, I got a prescription because mine was bad, too, dude. Like, and I was afraid to smile because sometimes you'd have that hard patch and it would just be like it would be like a gang of acne. Like, yeah, MS, third acne or whatever.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
Yeah. And you would smile and it would fucking just skyrocket.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
squirt on somebody it was almost like you were um you were afraid to make certain faces because a couple of them would go off you know it was like you know like actually i don't know if mine was that intense i had if you get them like in here in the corners of my nose so scary yeah i already have a big nose so if i get a pimp one i'd have to stay home until it went away or whatever yeah
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
um god dude yeah acne was acne was crazy because you didn't do anything right you've been at home you're just growing up or whatever yeah and then god's like oh yeah you little bastard i know it's like you see these people who don't wash their face and they just have perfect flawless skin and then you're over here doing everything you can and you got you know 100 blackheads on your nose and probably 40 pimples on your face and it's just like
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
And we had this blotter stuff. It was like this, this green stuff came out at one point. You have to put it all. It had a, like a blotter, almost like a, um, for playing bingo and you'd put it all over your skin, but it had green, it was green, right? It's kind of green and you couldn't tell right when you put it on.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
But if you were at school and you had a white shirt or something, your whole shirt or your neck would start just getting green throughout the day. Cause you'd sweat it down. You know, it was harrowing. How old are you? I was probably 11, 12.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
much joy out of like having the manipulation of the situation is it giving away the money is because there's so many moments in there where i'm like watching people's feelings change like what is it for you that like have you been able to figure out because you've done so many of these types of um competitions and opportunities for people right yeah i mean this the thing is you
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
We had prayer and some other shit that they had. Yeah, meeting the first girl was, oh, I remember in our apartment complex, some dad, I remember, this is the first girl that I maybe had a crush on or something. The dad got a daughter a drum, right, for Christmas or whatever.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
And she would make her play like on the back porch. She would practice. And I would go around and listen. And she would play. What's that Ice Cube song? It's like... It was a good day? Yeah, kind of thank God. She would play that dude. And I would just go down there and I just fell in love listening to her play that. And I remember that. It was like the first- What happened between you guys?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
Oh, nothing. There was some violence between our families a little bit. My brother had some issues, I think with her brother, but that was like the first crush.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
Uh, somebody like got upset at somebody and somebody threw like, um, like a stump or whatever through somebody's bathroom window. It got, they really got hot sometimes, dude. But I, but between me and her, she didn't know that. I don't think she ever knew that, but I would listen to her play that. And the dad would yell at her to fucking play it. He was, I think a Raiders fan or whatever.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
Um, anyway, sorry. Kind of rambling. Um, you just got back from India, right? Yeah. Nice dude. How was that?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
I went to India when I was a student. We went to Madras and we worked at like a children's home. It was just a week, but it was magnificent, man. Some of the most beautiful, energetic humans in the world. A lot of happiness I felt like over there. So I really enjoyed it. What was your experience like?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
It's a lot of good energy over there and it's safe energy too. So the excitement, I feel like in a place like Indy, you don't feel like it's going to get to the place. Was it getting shady? You think?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
Well, they have billions of people. It's not a lot of personal space over there.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
They just, yeah, I remember being, they would, people were sleeping on the side of the road there. I remember in India when I was there, you would just be driving at night and people just, you know, somebody was just walking and I guess they decided to get some rest or whatever. Um, but yeah, you don't even get your own pillow in India.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
Like you lay down and then there's other, you know, people have little quad. It's just, there's a lot of people there, you know, there's a lot of folks. Um, you were talking about feastables, dude. And thank you guys sent me some, you know, I'll go the whole day. I don't need any sugar. Middle of the night, crack open to a box of feastables that some asshole sent me. And, uh, I'm that asshole.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
Yeah. And they're awesome. Thank you. And the peanut butter one is probably my favorite one. Thank you. But then it's like, I just have so much, you know, I freak out in the middle of the night and cause I'm just a damn sugar pervert. And then now I just can't go back to bed, you know, but thank you. And, but what I want to say is, would you ever do like a Willy Wonka type of thing?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
Grateful to finally catch up with the one and only Mr. Beast.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
Cause I feel like this, I mean, you already are kind of there, you know?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
Oh, wow. And he looks a little bit like Charlie from the original Chocolate Factory. Pull up a Charlie from the original Chocolate Factory photo there. Let's do a little side by side.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
And I'm going to be so accurate here, which blew my own mind, actually. Yeah, actually.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
Let's go. Hold on. No, no. The picture on one is up one. Wait, no. Scroll. Yeah. No, right there to the left. Left on that side. Right there.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
So pretty close, huh? Yeah. Your imagination. Pretty close right there. Holy shit. That could be him.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
That's one vote for Bobby Kennedy right there, dude. that's crazy bro oh bobby flay bobby flay's daughter is beautiful actually and i don't care if she hears it um she's super talented that's exactly what i mean she's also stunning young lady um but what are we saying no no i got more to say i'll tell you this um Yeah, so you already did that, man.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
I just did three days the other day of only water. Or I did 72 hours. It was good. Got a little temperamental.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
And what were you, did you notice like, but your clarity got pretty sharp as a whip. Were you able to use that?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
Former all pro NFL tackle Russell Okung is also over 150 pounds since retiring, including losing a hundred pounds in 40 days by fasting every day. Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
That's fair, dude. They should do that around like a, um, IndyCar race, you know? Just put a big, huge circle around like a Talladega or whatever. Why? And just be like, lose 100 pounds. Oh, I didn't think about the end of it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
Yeah. That sounds interesting. Is there a video, say if you got to, they shut you down, they're like, beast, you're done. No more beasting around here, boy. Get out of here, beast. What if people were like that? And then you had to make, you got to make one more video. Do you know what it would be, you think? That's only one more.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
I mean... Because you're already... I mean, you've got the $5 million. You know, you've upped the ante. Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
And how many shows can you have? Like, can you have a couple of things going like that at once?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
And do you come up with most of the ideas yourself or do you have kind of a team when you guys kind of pull them?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
So first of all, you'd find somebody who you like, okay, I like this, that this person comes up with ideas. And then you'd be like, now I just need to have, I need them to encourage them to consume different things. It's almost like different ingredients to come out with a different cake.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
Yeah, you mentioned that when we were taping that you were surprised by some people's integrity. Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
Like, how do I make something that Prince would drink milk out of, you know?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
Like how do you make something that Prince would drink milk out of? Prince, Prince Musician, what's his last name?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
You know that song? He's a musician, but purple. He was like a purple guy. Gotcha, gotcha, gotcha. So like, how do you make this, right? There's 2,000 princes, right? But he's the one-on-one. He's Prince. Gotcha, gotcha. Right? Like, that's what I'm saying. Like, how do you...
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
You know, I like going to live events. I know that. And I know that right now I'm actually going to get my friend some tickets so he can go see the Bengals and the Steelers game as a gift, as a holiday gift for him. I'm excited about doing that. Game time is where I'm going to do it. Game time. If you want to go to sports, music, theater, comedy, anything you want to attend, game time helps you.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
Game time has a new feature called game time picks that makes getting tickets for your favorite live events even easier. That's right. So there's bangles, Steelers tickets. Game time will help me figure it out. They have all in pricing over there. Toggling this feature shows the total upfront with no surprise fees at checkout. Good. Thanks, GameTime.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
Take the guesswork out of buying tickets with GameTime. Simply download the GameTime app, create an account, and use code WEEKEND for $20 off your first purchase. Terms apply. Again, create an account and redeem code W-E-E-K-E-N-D for $20 off. Download GameTime today. What time is it? Game time. I'll tell you this. I had a subscription to a necktie corporation or whatever.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
Is there one age group or gender group or any demographic you can give me on who it seems like? after doing a lot of challenges where you've gotten to see some integrity.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
And every month they sent me these dang neckties, you know, ties for your neck. Sent me them. Yeah, I had dang so many. I don't even wear neckties. I had enough of them. You could rappel down a dang third story building side of it. And I was like, I got to stop this. Thank you, Rocket Money, for helping me find that subscription that I didn't want. Rocket Money. It's a personal finance app.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
That helps you find and cancel your unwanted subscriptions, monitors your spending and helps lower your bills so you can grow your savings. Thank you, Rocket Money. Rocket Money has over 5 million users and has saved a total of over 500 million in canceled subscriptions, saving members up to $740 a year when using all of the app's features. Stop wasting money on things you don't use.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
Cancel your unwanted subscriptions by going to rocketmoney.com slash Theo. That's R-O-C-K-E-T-M-O-N-E-Y dot com slash T-H-E-O rocketmoney.com slash Theo. This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. That's the truth. Therapy, you know, we think about it sometimes. Some people think they don't need it. You'll figure it out yourself, will you? How long are you going to tell yourself that?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
You know, I would tell myself things for years. Oh, well, this will get better in five years, and it's the same in 10 years, and it's the same. Now, I don't know that therapy would definitely help, but nothing changes if nothing changes. Maybe something helps. That's the truth. You know, especially during the holidays, you're like, oh man, I still have the same issue that I had last year.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
Man, I wish I could have solved it this year or at least addressed it, help talk about it with someone so I could show up a little differently for myself. Well, BetterHelp can help. If you're thinking of starting therapy, give BetterHelp a try. It's entirely online. It's designed to be convenient, flexible, and suited to your schedule.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
Just fill out a brief questionnaire to get matched with a licensed therapist and switch therapists at any time for no additional charge. Find comfort this December with BetterHelp. Visit betterhelp.com slash Theo today to get 10% off your first month. That's betterhelp, H-E-L-P, dot com slash T-H-E-O. Like, what are some common misconceptions about you or your work, do you feel like?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
I mean, maybe the senior citizen, some seniors can't make it through that.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
Yeah, is that you're still like this kind of just entertainment for kids or that your entertainment, your ability to entertain is also still junior.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
Yeah, it's not like you have to be- The child inside of me liked it and the adult inside of me liked it. Exactly.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
That would be bad. No, I don't think people, some seniors, I don't know if I would let one of my grandparents watch this. Just the levels of- Yeah, your heart beating. There's a lot, yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
But did you know it was gonna be that much stress? Do you find that you like the stress? Like, I remember even just for myself, right? Like we have responsibilities now. We do like six episodes a month now. And at first I remember I could barely do one episode a week was tough in some weeks. It still is. But then some days I'll go through and it's like, this just starts to feel easier.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
I start to kind of acclimate to where I am. And then there's a part of my brain that's like, okay, well now what can we do? But that same part of my brain is just the brain that, that forgets like fucking, we barely just got to this place and are we even okay here? Right. So it's tough for me to like monitor the different parts of my brain. The one that wants to do more or try new things.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
And the one that, also wants to make sure we're okay where we're at and not forget.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
Right, and be happy, yeah. It's like, yeah. So most of the time I work now, it's like, I guess what my question is like, I don't know what it is, man. Do you know what it is?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
Yeah. And are you able to battle that? Do you know, did you know you were as competitive in, and, or do you think you're competing against like the algorithm or you want people to see it? Like, you know, what is that thing that are you able to notice? Like, cause I don't even know sometimes what drives me to do things or even want to learn more.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
Well, it's interesting because in the beginning, you're kind of working for yourself because you're the creator, but then you build an audience and then you start to work for the audience in a weird way, right? Yeah, yeah. And there's no judgment against that, but I just noticed that in my own life. In the beginning, like, I'd give anything to have an audience, you know, but it's more like me.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
It felt like me being me, but then it also starts to feel like you, now you have the audience, now you have somebody to work for.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, I was going to say, what did you learn about being a boss? Like, because I never wanted to be like having any employees, right? I never even wanted to be an employee. I didn't want to have any employees. I wanted to have pizza, you know.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
Yeah, you know what I'm saying? I want to live in a park. But what I'm saying is, oh, shit, hold on. I know what it is. I think that what did you learn about yourself, like about being a boss? Like I learned that if I don't show up in a comfortable way, then it affects how my employees are. I've learned that I have to communicate better as to what I want because people don't just know what I want.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
Those are some things that I've learned, learned in the hard way kind of. Were there things that you've learned just about being a boss?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
And but you stayed in motion. It sounds like to the like.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
You're like, this is how I do. I need something funny. I'll go to a place that has funny. I need a guy who can, you know, sell refrigerators, but talk about also iPods, right?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
Because some of those people are just smoking weed and wearing a shirt. They're not even clocked in.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
You're like, if I put away 20 grand, you know that I'm only going to be able to make 80% of the best video I could make at that time.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
She's like, give me, you'll figure this out. Exactly. And like Mr. Beast, Sun Beast.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
Wow. Did you ever do something nice for your mom? Did you guys ever go to a concert together or something? Y'all like to do anything together?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
Oh, I mean, I definitely did, man. And the interesting thing to me too is like a lot of times with game shows and it's the contestants that you start to get to know, right? Yeah. But with this, it's not the contestants.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
And it's a risk, dude. You're like this human. And most humans, look up most humans or whatever.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
It's, you know, it's a shaky business. Just being a human.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
There's been recently in the news and stuff, I'm not as abrupt on it, but it seemed like they were trying to poke holes in you guys' company and stuff.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
But a lot of it, I don't know if there was like... different allegations and stuff against, if it was against you or your company, but none of it, from what I've seen, there was never any validity to it, right? Do you believe that there was actually something going on at your company that was bad, or do you believe that...
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
other people, like at a certain point, if your company is doing so well that other companies are outside dark interests, get upset and try to lead like reporters or create like a negative buzz. Is that a crazy question?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
Yeah, we'll start right now, man. Let's do it. Mr. Beast, Jimmy, nice to see you today. Likewise. Bro, that's awesome, man. So Beast Games, that's the show.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
And it's weird for you because if something happens at Nike, then it's like, there's an issue. There's something happened at Nike. But if something happens at a production company and you're all basically the, you were exactly the business, then a lot of it probably just feel.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
yeah it would seem like god it would just seem like so much stuff is out of your hands when it's got to be tough when you're a creator you know because you want to be do every you know you kind of want to do everything and have it as a business scales it's kind of tough because you can't you know um what else would i want to ask you about oh i wanted to ask you about he's got the flash cards sorry dude no it's cool i went as long as i could
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
that's about that was a long for me uh so yeah like you've had like we were talking earlier about like philanthropy so you had like you've taken plastics out of the ocean right you put um help people with eyesight um you put the water you've done water wells in africa yeah zambia oh yeah in africa 100 wells all across zambia or africa
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
Did you, like, what is, is there like a overall goal of like a big crazy vision you see for the future of like some sort of philanthropic idea?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
I've used, yeah. It depends on what kind of farms we're talking about, but I, yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
It sounds crazy. I didn't know there was bad chocolate out there.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
If they can't survive, if the family can't eat, if the kids don't also work.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
And also that's a way of, that's a really a big form of philanthropy itself because, you know, just teaching these people how to do, how to, have more success in their own lives. I mean, that kind of stuff is huge. You teach one person in an area and then they can be a leader and teach other people. It's like, you don't even realize kind of the residual effects of that.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
Big chocolates going down, boy. I like that. I hate three musketeers. I'll say it out loud. And when people eat them and I'll say this, when people eat them, I judge them.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
Can we believe it in some artistic way? So at least it looks exciting.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
Oh, no, I don't know any of their behaviors. I don't know what they're doing before they mail it to me or whatever. I don't like it. I never have liked it. And I don't even believe in it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
Which is also a way that I feel about it. Like when I open it up, I don't even... I don't even believe in it. And paydays, the nuts aren't any good in them anymore.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
Yep. And the nuts used to be a little more, they had more edges on them. They looked like more nuts.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
It fell off for me and I don't know when. My mom used to get them sometimes. It would be like a special thing that she would get, but she would let us watch her eat them. I'm going to tell you this. Um, did you, do you ever dealt with like, you're so big on YouTube. Do you ever deal with sanctions and stuff on there? Have you had to deal with that? Is that a conversation you have with them?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
It was, uh, we spent dollars. Oh my God. Yeah. I hope my mom's all right.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
Sanctions? Like, or do, or they say like, you can't do certain things. Like, do you have to like submit all your videos and, and like go through a process like that? Um, well, can we even talk about that?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
With what? Just like having to set up parameters for different videos and like the effect that it could have on certain people and that sort of thing. Like, I always just think about it from my perspective. I'm always like, well, we're upset. You know, sometimes like, oh, they'll make us take a joke or this joke or this sort of thing. They may not, you know.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
Yeah, that's what I'm saying. Sometimes I only look at it from my perspective. I'm not able to look at it from like, oh, also, this is a platform where they allow us to put our stuff up. Exactly. And then so they also are trying to do business as well. Yeah. You know? What else do we have here? We're almost done. I mean, we can keep going.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
No, I'm just trying to give some different. Oh my God. It kind of gives me different reactions.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
I'm dying. A lot of people need a drink to be around the polls.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
They don't dig it. Yeah. Yeah. I think people, I think it's getting less and less popular in the world. Kind of, especially with like younger generation. It's just like, they just think it's kind of dumb.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
Yeah, definitely, I've done a lot of that. In July, you tweeted, if you were to lower the age for president that you might run, do you still think that ever?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
But there could be potentially a President Beast. You never know.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
You never know, especially if you learn a lot. Has Elon ever reached out to you to do something cool together? Because, I mean, you guys at a certain point, you guys are both like pioneers in certain schools of thought and certainly creative folks. Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
Yeah. Yeah. We tried to ask if we could interview those, the two people stuck up in that shuttle.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
I wanted to be the first one because people are like, who do you want to get on your podcast? And they're like, anybody. And I was trying to think, who can you not get in? Like, oh, somebody who's not on earth. Yeah. That's who you got to get. Yeah, that would be sick. Somebody who's just loitering or whatever, you know? And I love how they're not aliens, but yeah, it's like, all right.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
Do you think it was you? I think maybe. They offered to send me a Starlink if I want to get one. So I might get one. Are you using them?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
Did you see anything cool? Because a lot of people say in Antarctica that they're hiding secret stuff up there, that there's that kind of energy.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
Yeah. Imagine, first of all, you're almost blind. Can't shit. Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
Is there a chance that at one point it was thawed out and it was a normal land and we'll be able to explore it one day and we just don't know or that's complete nothing?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
Do you think you'll get to do a video with Kim Jong-un ever? I mean. Like a game show to help some of his citizens?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
They don't want to inspire. They don't want their people to see that.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
Were you employing just a lot of locals? I mean, just, you were just, you would set up, you would put out the employment opportunities in advance.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
And to know that it's more for adults. I think you're right. I think you're perfectly right. When you think about Mr. Beast, there's a part of you that still thinks part of it's for children. And it is for children. But it's also for everyone.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
Yeah. Closest thing I can think is that Angola Prison Rodeo. Have you ever heard of that? It's down in... No. Outside of Baton Rouge. I mean, it's not like what you're talking about, but it's like they put on a pretty good event once a year down there. And the prisoners do the rodeo. Wait, what? Yeah. The Angola Prison Rodeo. Angola Prison. Pretty awesome if you're into that kind of stuff.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
And where does your joy come from? Like, cause you give away, you've given away a lot of money, right? And then you give away a lot of joy while I'm watching. Like there's something also like there's moments in there as I'm watching, I'm like, Oh, what would I do in that instance? Right. That comes into my head. And then you see the reactions.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
But yeah, you would definitely be able to do this way better. But just letting you know, there's a little bit of competition out there. Wait, so those are prisoners? Yep, they put them all in this circle, right? And if you leave the circle, they send the bulls through. And if you leave the circle, you lose, right? And what do the prisoners get out of it?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
I think they get time with a basketball or something. I don't know what the prize is. I'll have to look and see what the prizes are.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
We stayed in there. He really wants that prize. Right. But yeah, just to let you know, so there is a little competition out there. Have you ever, the last question I have for you, you ever seen that show Hands on a Hard Body? You ever see that movie?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
Hands on a Hard Body. There was a car, somebody went to a mall. Oh, that one. The documentary, yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
And they all have their hand on a hard body. The original one is great. Oh, there's a musical now? That's hilarious. Yeah. And the guy's like, nothing getting me to take my hand off, but here it goes.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
You did? Yeah, with 50 people. Well, this is how somebody walked up and was like, hey, you want this chocolate bar? And I got like, I would love it. And he took it with both hands. Damn. Who takes a chocolate bar off somebody with both hands? And he made a mistake. And he lost.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
They say that the world will be changed by individuals and humans. And sometimes you start to think that that's not going to happen, you know, that people are going to expect a government to do it. But then I think you meet somebody like you and you're like, wow, anything is maybe possible, man. I think that's kind of like a feeling that I really got spending time with you today, man. Um, yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
Thanks for sharing your new show with me. And, um, what is it tough for you to like, so if you have, if you spend so much time working and, uh, would it like is relationship something that's hard for you to navigate? I know you said you have a relationship. Is that a tough thing for you to drop in and also be like a regular person?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
Like, cause I'll notice I'll invite a girl over and then I'll sit there and do work.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
If somebody screws somebody over and you see the reaction, if somebody is get screwed over. And you kind of think like, okay, well, what feeling would I want to have, you know? And, and then like in the moment you're like, oh yeah, I would definitely take the money.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
But then right now, looking back, when I start to even think about some of those moments, I'd be like, man, it must've been really tough to leave and have those people feel. And so maybe I wouldn't have, right. It's just, it's interesting just as a viewer, all the little moments that I kind of navigate and then kind of learn about myself. But what do you get? Like, like you give away so much money.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
Like, did you have to say like, will you, can I subscribe to your heart or something like that? Like, did you?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
Oh, I thought a lot of things, man. First of all, I thought that you are obviously, you're this Wizard of Oz, Willy Wonka kind of, William Wallace of finances type of energy going on. Okay. You know, there's a lot of that. A lot. Like, I've never seen a show where every... I mean, a couple minutes, there's like another twist of possibility, right? Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
Yeah, connections. Sometimes you got to connect with people to put you in a little bit better place.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
Yeah, it's important. Jimmy, thanks so much, man. Thanks for spending time, dude. I'm definitely a fan. You know, yeah, I'd love to chat again sometime about business or something. And, you know, it's funny, you meet people. Sometimes you think they're heroes or they're great. And sometimes once you learn about them, it's kind of like whatever, you know, they were better to see from afar.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
I was going to say, that's not the case, man. I'm excited. Yeah, I'm excited for everybody to see Beast Games.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
If they're children or adults. Yeah, man, we'll come over there for sure. I'll invite you.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
I'll invite you to one. Thanks so much for all the content and entertainment. I'm excited to see what you do in the future, man. I think you inspire a lot of people.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
No, but I think it's just like anything is possible. I agree. I hate fucking getting them.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
Do you feel like you're like making up for something in a past life? Or like, is there something that like, you didn't grow up with a lot of money, you know? And so was it, do you like, when you think back on little moments, like, did you see somebody give some money once and it made you feel excited?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
Oh, I can't. It makes me really uncomfortable. I can't wait for them to get done saying something nice.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
doing this but because before I noticed my default would always just be to these people start complimenting and I just change the subject yeah instantly yeah me too I'll be like oh that's sweet of you to say we should go outdoors that's what I'll say yeah or I'd be like yeah interesting anyways so what yeah oh it's very sweet of you I was wondering the other day if the Jets will win anything this year and people were like what are we even you know but yeah it's gotten yeah sometimes you navigate it a little bit better as time goes on you know is this brand also paying
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
Yeah. But we'd like to get a water. My goal one day is to make a water.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
This is my goal to make a water. Right. I want to have a hat like a wellness facility for people recovering from addiction.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
OK. And it's on a on land that has an aquifer so they can access water. And the people that are getting well are helping to create like.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
Yep. And then the water gets sold and the money goes to the facility.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
So it's like because so many people have been ruined by addiction that our government supported. Right. Or didn't really combat the opioid epidemic. So I'm like, well, how do you beat them? And you get something everybody needs that's clean for people, which is water. And then every time they buy it, they're helping somebody get clean, you know.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
Oh, that's a good point. You're kind of putting them in a whole new territory.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
You know what? We'll try both. We'll try both, you know? And we'll get some... All right.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
Or like, are you able to connect any of those dots as you get a little bit older and have some more breadth of time?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
Yeah, sometimes that's just the truth. It is. And it's a very simple truth. Yeah, I like helping somebody out.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
Yeah, it's scary to think that though. Like recently I was giving some money to some people that had been suffered from a storm, right? From some flooding. And I'm not saying that to make myself look exciting or anything, but it was nothing like this. And if they see that and then hear what I gave, they're like, oh, this guy's crazy.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
Yeah, you guys have given blind stuff. You've taken plastics out of the ocean.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
to get water but then you look upstream and there's literally cows shitting in that same water that they're you know drinking out of because that's like that's the world they live in and like we have anyways i don't know yeah no look no i think putting things in a perspective right changes things for people exactly were you was did you have to like kind of achieve a certain amount of finances before you were able to start giving away finances kind of
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
And now you're at $5 million, which is the largest amount that has ever been given away in a game show.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
No, I love it because you hear so many companies that companies that just like it's about their bottom. And it's like this is like the opposite of that. It's like, let's do something good. Yeah. And let's make a bunch of money. But then let's let's give it away.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
It's like the opposite of like all the other treacherous type of capitalism that you hear about, you know.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E548 MrBeast
You're going to make other, yeah. Dude, we had a dude, he would give you 10 bucks to look at his butt, right? Wait, what? Yeah, when I was, you know, when I was younger than I am now, for sure, he was a child. I don't want to say a child, but you just pretend I was a child, right? Because I was. And this guy would give you 10 bucks to look at his butt, right? Not up close, far away, you know?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
And at some point I got to be, no, that's not it. I don't have to, but I don't, it was just like, well, if I want this, I can also get it for myself, you know? And it really had the same effect.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
Once I got over the fact of like, oh, I wish they would show the affection first or I wish they would do the action to be the person providing the affection, which is probably what I thought of a lot when I was a child. But then this time I just reached and I just put my hand on my mom's hand, you know, because she's getting older.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
She's not the child now, but she's, you know, just where we're at in our lives. Things are kind of even. And it still had the same outcome for me. It made me feel, okay, the second I got over that little moment of kind of jealousy or wishing, or not jealousy, but like wishing somebody else had started the action.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
The second I got over that, I just had a nice moment where I got to sit there and just be with my mother and watch country music, which is something that we both enjoy doing. And something that's important to me in my life, you know, to have moments with my mother where we're doing something that we like to do and we're doing it together, you know. So I don't know if that sounds weird or whatever.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
Honestly, I don't care if it sounds weird, you know. I really don't, part of me does still, but, uh, but I think that part of me that, that needs those type of moments is like, Hey man, finally you're meeting, you're trying to meet just the universe, how you're taking some direction to do something for how you feel, you know?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
Um, instead of just, cause I always in my life have been caught in this moment, like, God, I wish they would do this. I wish this, I wish this. And, So I don't know, that was just kind of an interesting moment for me. And then I put my arm around my mom's shoulder and just like, yeah, like she was, you know, like she was, you know, my mom and we were just having a nice time.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
And once I did that, I was getting what I wanted out of the moment. You know, and I wouldn't have done it if I hadn't made an effort. I'm not trying to say, hey, look at me. I'm just trying to say like for so long, I've always been the person and I still am a lot of times.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
But this time I wasn't where I'm like, man, I wish somebody would do this so that I would be able to have a certain type of moment right now or so that to show me that they care. And I didn't really realize that if I do it myself, I can still get some of that same result. So I don't know if that makes a lot of sense or not. And yeah, just, I don't know.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
They're probably charging us for it. You know, we're probably getting charged for that, I'm sure. Welcome to the episode. Happy springtime, everybody. Good to be here with you today. What's happening? Oh, I'll tell you. Dude, so, oh, I went to a little chili cook-off around me. And, you know, I like, man, I'm lying. Chili is always, it's suspect. Chili is a suspect soup, really. That's what it is.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
Yeah, sometimes you, you know, you may only want, you know, you may... Sometimes you got to put your own pickles in the chili. That's what I'm saying, I think. I don't know if that sounds crazy, but sometimes if you want pickles in the chili and that's the only way you're going to have the chili, sometimes you got to bring the pickles, man. Because sometimes the world just serves chili. Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
So I don't know. But yeah, I want to speak that out loud too because it's just important to me that I start to live in a place in my life where I just don't let that uncomfortable moment of like, man, I wish they would do this so this could be the outcome. Where I don't let that prevent me from, even if I'm upset at them or whatever, that I don't let that prevent me from
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
maybe trying to take the action myself. I don't know. I know that doesn't apply to everything, but anyway, enough about me, man, enough about me. We got a lot of great calls that have come in today and I want to get to some of those. And again, I do want to apologize that we haven't gotten to do these type episodes a lot.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
I think about this all the time, you know, and I think that it's important and sometimes it's just been tough. And I'm not complaining. I'm just saying that it's been tough. And then, you know, you also have the opportunity to talk to guests and you're like, you're like, man, I love to talk with this person. And so you just try to balance it. So just bear with me.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
I just want to let you know that this community is important to me. And I'm trying to fine tune some things in my life a little bit better. So things are more organized. So I'm able to spend my energy where I would like to be able to spend it. Anyway, I know I don't need to say that, but I just want you to know that.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
All right, we have some calls that came in, and thank you guys for continuing to hit the hotline. As always, the number is 985-664-9503. And we got a call right here. Here we go.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
Wow. Dang, brother. You're going to be raising a dang lizard, homie. Wow, brother. Good golly. That's like shooting fish in a family or whatever. I don't know. I mean, I haven't looked at a chart recently. I don't know. the, um, the genetic legalities of that, but it do. Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
I mean, they say, you know, don't pee where, or don't eat where you're don't piss where your family is or whatever, whatever, whatever that old saying is, dude, you, I feel like you've gone past that at this point. And, um, God, that thing's going to have, you're going to need, um, yeah, you're going to need a farrier to come and put shoes on that thing. I'm just chirping you.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
I'm just chirping you, dude. Look, I feel you. Look, it's having a child with a cousin, I think, at the very least, it's going to need glasses. That thing is going to need bifocals, brother. You know, I mean, you're just playing Russian roulette with your DNA right there. But at the same time, man, I don't want to scare you.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
You know, and I do believe... I'm kind of chirping you there still, but I believe that everything is going to be fine. You know, I believe that everything is going to be fine. I think monitor the child's gestation closely. Make sure it's tracking. You know, make sure... that it has everything it needs because it is, bring it up. Can you, who can, can you have a child with your cousin or not?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
Let's, now that's just a poll. That says 40% say yes. But do you have any information on that? Oh, I should look it up. Who the hell am I even talking to? Dear God, out of my mind today. Can you have child with one cousin?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
Ooh, yes, it is physically possible for first cousins to have children, but it is important to understand that such relationships carry a slightly elevated risk of genetic disorders compared to unrelated parents, brother. So I'm just saying not everybody, you know, some people like things different. You know, some people like pickles on their jelly. You feel me?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
So it's, yeah, I think you got to make sure that when that baby right out the gate put that baby on a damn... You know, let some other people look at it and sign off on that bastard right out the gate, homie. And definitely, I would make sure, you know, make sure it doesn't stand straight up when the moon is full and shit like that when it's real young. Just, I'd keep tabs on it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
I'd hit a couple high notes near it on an instrument and see if it fucking, see if its eyes turn red or anything. But you're just going to have to keep tabs on it because that's risky. And look, a lot of people... Have good-looking cousins. Let's say that. But not a lot of them are as brave as you, brother. So, yeah, I would just stay conscious of that and recognize you have an at-risk child.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
Hire a night nurse or lifeguard or whatever you got to get. Sometimes lifeguards will work overnight. They're cheaper. They know CPR. They don't know a lot of the shit that the nannies know, but they're still there. Got a whistle. So, yeah. Yeah, I think just, yeah, just stay safe, brother. And I would back off that type of behavior.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
It's just a bunch of, it's like the hail of soups. It's like, all right. All right, soup. I see what you doing. We right here. It's just that kind of soup, you know, it's thickened up, baby. It's like soup got a BBL, baby. That's chili. Chili. And so I went to a little, I stopped by a little, they had a small chili tent cook-off area. And they had four vendors or something in there.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
You know, if you win this round of DNA roulette, brother, I'd leave the rest of the bullets in the chamber, baby, when it comes to family. Let's take another call here. And thank you to the last fellow, Theo, actually. Dear God, I didn't even realize that. Man, and look, hey, bud, I can't tell you to be honest with you if I'd have had a really good-looking cousin. TBD, homie.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
So the Lord don't give you what you can't handle, you know. But I'm just saying, yeah, just get out, you know, just meet somebody else, meet somebody different. Because if you're dating your cousin, you're not even getting out there. But maybe you're getting married to your cousin. I don't look, brother. I don't know. I would ask probably a state official or somebody.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
I would ask a pastor about this one. But, yeah, let's get back to this call that came in.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
Well, you're in welding school. That's a good school. And I had a family member who started a welding school. It's a good business. Onward.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
Amen, brother. Thank you for asking and just for reaching out. Yeah, it's a good you know, this is a great question because you're like, do I do a trade or do I go into the military? And especially you mentioned one thing yet going to the military and you get discounts like I wouldn't go into the military just because you're going to get 15 percent off at Long John Silver's or whatever.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
That's not a reason to go into the military for four years just so you can get, you know, free left shoes at DSW Shoes or whatever, you know, or 11% off of Cheesy Biscuits over there at Red Lobsters, you know. You know, that's not, I would take that out of the equation. And I would just look at, do you like welding? You're saying you don't like it. But do you not like the school part of it?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
If you don't like this, I would find out what don't I like? Because sometimes we say that. It's like, I hate this. But what really do I hate about it? Do you hate that you're in school for it right now? Do you hate that you're having to learn it? Do you hate that you have to get up at certain hours to go learn it? Because you may love welding. You may not like being at class at 8 a.m.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
And I'm not saying those things. I'm just asking you to or suggesting that you try to figure out, well, what don't I like about it? Because sometimes I'll just be like, man, I hate that shit. But I never really look at, well, why do I hate it? And then I might realize I don't really hate that. I hate this other thing that comes with that.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
But I do believe that if you get into a trade that you do not like, that you won't enjoy it. And I do believe that there are things out there that we can all do that we would enjoy doing. I believe that there's so many things. So, yeah, I would take a look at that, man. I would take a look and just decide if you do not like welding and military is your backup, I think the military is a great idea.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
You know, I mean, you know, I don't think it's a bad idea, especially at your age. I wished I'd have gone to the military. I spent a lot of time just sitting around, just trying to lick my own dick or whatever, you know, or, you know, buying binoculars and shit and just fucking not doing shit or whatever, being a fucking shitty neighbor or whatever, pervert.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
But what you, you know, you, if you go into the military now, yeah, you're out in four years and you probably have a lot of skills.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
you know you may it'll probably help you get up early stay in shape all these things that are going to really help shape the rest of your life right now some people may have went to the military say theo you know what the you're talking about honky you little queer you little gun or whatever that's fine they can say those things and i don't i haven't been but for you you're saying that that's you what you've thought of as your backup option you know now you might you know i don't know how long the military will be there you know
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
Just ladling booty gas edibles into small bowls for people. And so I get up there and I got me some chili and they had one place they were saying we got all the fixings, toppings and this and that. You know, you could put anything on that bitch. You could put cheese, onions, a little bit of GHB. And they one place was offering. But I just said, hey, do you have pickles?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
depending on what they keep having our military carry out and the different actions that they have them do. But, I think it's an honorable thing. I have a ton of respect for our military. And I don't think you would go wrong with that choice. So that's kind of where I'm at with it, you know. And if you went in there, you know, you'd probably make a lot of great friends.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
And you'd learn things about yourself that you like and don't. And then you'd be done. And you're right. You'd only be 22 and a half years old. 23 years old. You have so much time. There's so much time. Man, I wasted a lot of time.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
And one of the things I wish I'd done as a military, just because I think you don't also get those moments of camaraderie where you get to be around a bunch of other guys, you know. So those are just my thoughts. Recognize I have never been in the military. But I do think you have time to do that and do countless other things. And if you don't like welding, you know you don't like it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
then maybe it is time for a backup trade to try or a backup option. What else is going on?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
Oh, big facts, sister. Okay. Oh, once our parents start doing something, we don't want to do it anymore. So I think that all checks out. I think you're good. I think just trust your instincts, little mom. Here we got a call. Let's hear this one.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
Yeah, motherfucker. BLM, dude. Look. Yeah, if life gives you pickles and bananas, bitch, mix them bitches. Okay, fuck yeah, dude. I mean, there's only so long you can be trapped somewhere with pickles and bananas and not put them bitches together, dude. Make some binicles, homie, you feel me? So, look, some picnanas, homie. I think that all checks out, brother.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
So I don't think there's any shame in it. You can always, once you get your feet back under you, go back to that 7-Eleven and give them money for those bananas. Let's hear a little more.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
You like pickles on your bananas, boy? You like pickles on your bananas?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
Well, it blows my fucking mind that we can give so much foreign aid to places when we have people who are eating fucking pickles and bananas. Actually, pickles and bananas are pretty good, so that's not what I mean. But yeah, you would think we'd be able to help our own people that are starving first over here. That's just kind of how I feel. I'm kind of an American.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
I'm a North America first kind of guy, I guess, because that's us and our neighbors. But what the fuck do I know? But yeah, man, honestly, you sound pretty healthy. You sound like you're doing pretty good. You ever hit a couple of high notes, dude? I think you're fine. I'd join a church choir, have somebody make some TikToks, see if you can start selling tickets on the road, brother.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
And the guy just I mean, this guy looked at me. I mean, this dude, he was stirring this big pot of chili. He was just a damn chili witch, you know? And he was just stirring a big cauldron of fucking booty goop, you know? And I said, yeah, do you have any pickles for it? And he's like, you want pickles on your chili? Really? And I was like, yeah, yeah, that's what I, because that's what I like.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
You're going to be fine. But yeah, sometimes we all get in tough moments. Trying to think of something where I was kind of down to my last dime. Oh, I do remember I'd get that block of damn hamburger meat. That bitch came in a missile. That bitch, they dropped that bitch off a C-130. That thing, you know what I'm talking about? It's shaped like a.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
Like both ends are kind of a wiener, kind of like the front end of a wiener. God, that thing was heavy. You had to carry it out like this, you know? And sometimes I'd mix it up by the damn Duraflame logs and accidentally put that bitch in there and just cook that bitch and have her spoon it out the fire to eat it. Call the fire department. Hey, take some matches, huh?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
But yeah, man, it sounds like you're doing okay. Yeah. What else is going on? What else can I tell you about that happened to me recently? Not much. Going to eat dinner with my neighbors. Looking forward to that. Hitting the road for some more shows. Yeah, we went last week.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
Oh, Victoria Island, which is a beautiful, fascinating little, it's like this cold, white Hawaii off of the coast of Vancouver. But just great people, man. Canadians and grateful to see them. I'm a Winnipeg Jets fan. Just letting everybody know that now too. I don't want that to cause any issues between me and anybody else. But that's – I'm a Winnipeg Jets fan.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
So I think their jerseys are fire and I like their – they're doing good. And – that's good. So, okay. I think that works. What else? Uh, let's take this call right here.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. We'll be right back. Thank you very much. Thank you. Thank you. P P P P P P P P P P P P P P P,,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
I just, I like, I like putting just pickles on there. And he's like, you want pickles on your filly? And it was like he couldn't understand. I was like, yes, yes, sir. And he's like, you want pickles on your filly? He couldn't handle it, man. The dude couldn't handle it. So I guess the moral of that story, I don't know what the moral of that story is, dude. Who gives a dang?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
The moral of the story is sometimes you want things that people can't give you. I think maybe that's the moral of the story. I got this shirt on. This is a beautiful, beautiful shirt. This was given to me by the Bronx Fire Department. Baby, engine 43, son. Cuatro dos, baby. QD in the house. I'll tell you what happened. So I was walking down the street. I'd broken my toe, right?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
And so when you break your toe, you suddenly everything, you see everything a lot clearer because you can't go fast. So you go very slow. You ever see that guy that's crossing the crosswalk like backwards in a wheelchair by himself? And you're like, Jesus, dude. You know, you pray for him, but you're also a little bit pissed, you know? You're like, dear God, help this motherfucker hurry up.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
Now, you've had quite an experience in your life. I've heard that you've had a couple miracles kind of occur in your life. Can you kind of take me through some of that situation? Yeah, how did it start?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
My God, brother, I'm sorry to hear that. Thank you for just telling us about that. 10 times, that's a lot. I mean, did they, do you, do you feel like that was a lot? You feel like it was too many? Like, how did you?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
Oh, God, brother. And if two-thirds of you is gone, what do you do at that point? Were you able to call the authorities, or what do you do?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
He was Snapchatting also? Yeah. Oh, dark times, but you got to make content, you know? Yeah. And which hole do you plug? Say you have 10 stab wounds, I guess. They're referred to as by the government or whatever. Do you plug one up? Do you pick the most kind of active one? What do you do there?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
And did you have any experience? Do you remember anything when you passed out?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
Because what, you guys were partying a little too much or whatever? Yeah, pretty much. And were you allowed to drink in the hospital or no?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
Yeah, a lot of people don't live through something like that, man.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
Dude, that's a fresh outfit, baby. Scotty dripping, huh?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
Well, dude, when you break your toe, you go slower than that, dude. He is the hare, you are the tortoise. You go slower than that dude. So I'm in New York City. I'm walking around and, you know, and I'd just broken my toe probably 48 hours before. And so that bitch was big and dark.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
Yeah, who knew that train was a pedophile also? That sounds like a bit much, huh? Dude, that's insane, man. So were you drunk or were you already impaired when the train hit you or what kind of condition were you in physically just at that point in your life?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
I got this question though. Sorry to interrupt you there, but what kind of train driver would hit a drunk, just hit a guy, would hit a drunk guy? Did you ever speak to the driver?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
You can see a white dude most of the time, you know, no matter what's going on, but damn brother, I can't believe that. And so, so you were stabbed 10 times. You've been hit by a train, but God had more in store for you. Didn't he? What else happened?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
Oh, yeah, right. The moguls got some bounce to them, huh?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
And how far is that? Is that a jump you're trying to make, or did you have kind of a rope set up or anything like that? Did you have a little trebuchet, anything?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
Well, it's a great idea. I mean, here's the thing. People don't realize that people that are wasted have done amazing things. You know, one of the guys, um, have you heard of Lewis and Clark? Uh, yeah, I think so. One of them was an addict and they discovered like a third of the North America. So let's don't, you can't always beat down on addicts, but so take me out there.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
And you could feel it had a little bit of heartbeat of its own, you know, like it had a damn bass track running through it. And I'm wearing some hey dudes that I have that, uh, Because it's just easy to get in and out of them, the shoes. And anyway, you're just slowly going everywhere. You know, so you start meeting people and people are saying stuff at you and yelling, you know.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
You're on the balcony, you're high on cocaine. And what is your plan is to make that leap over to the other balcony?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
Big Matty, dude. Taking on the freaking Boreas twins, brother. Taking on the Jetstream up there. Seventh floor Matty. One shot. And how do you make that leap, dude? Take me through that. Are you wearing shoes?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
Yeah, but that's one way to look at it, man. But I think another way to look at it is that... You're a miracle. You know, a lot of people do not get to live through stabbings, through train hittings, through falling. How far did you fall? 70 feet. Okay. And take me, Jesus Christ, that's a lot. And take me through some of that.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
Like when you first hit the, once you first realized you're not going to make the first balcony, were there lower balconies you could have grabbed?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
Big dog went down, brother. God, dude. And so what were some of your thoughts during that? Did you get into a certain position to absorb the impact or were you just kind of like letting, were you praying? What was going on?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
Well, you must feel like God wants you here for a reason, brother.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
What do you feel like that is after all this? I mean, that's countless times you've escaped death, man. You know, forced to swim as a baby, train hitting, stabbing, stabbing, or high amount stabbing, 70-foot fall off of a balcony.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
Hey, you know, I love the podcast. Get out the street, faggot. Just different, just New York. Just New York hellos, you know. and I'm walking past this one spot and this guy comes up and he's like, Hey, you want to, and he'd been drinking and he was either, he was Italian or he was, uh, like fast Polish, you know, or Poland or, or he was, he was either Polish or, uh, slow Italian.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
Right, I understand what you're getting at, but I think... What do you feel like you're, do you feel like you have a bigger purpose? There's a reason a lot of people are not able to go through all that, man. You understand that's pretty miraculous. Do you understand that?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
Amen, brother. And how are you doing today? What's your physical state today?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
I mean... And you're a survivor, brother. You're a damn survivor, dude. You're a damn... You know what I'm saying? You're a damn gravity monkey, dude. Do you think you will ever walk again, brother? Um...
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
probably not but I'm okay with that I don't really I love watching YouTube there's so much people come up with stuff every day oh yeah gives me something to do oh yeah you can watch people walk on YouTube all day if you want and take it easy you know yeah but man I just yeah I appreciate you just jumping on and I appreciate you paying attention to the show and yeah we're gonna come to Calgary dude you gotta come out I'd love to get to meet you out there
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
Well, yeah, we'll have to catch up, dude. I want to touch some magic limbs you got on you, daddy. I want to rub them bitches for good luck. Hell yeah. Where do you live these days, man?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
You got to pray to meet the one you want. That's what my friend told me the other day. He said, are you praying to meet the woman you want to meet? Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
Oh, damn. How long before you had fallen did you bust a nut, you think?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
And look, man, you're going to bust one. We're going to we're going to if we can do anything, if we hear of anything that, you know, could help you, any elixirs or anything like that, we'll see what we can do, man. But yeah, dude, that's that's if you can get hit by a train and still be alive or whatever, you can you'll get another nut out.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
Well, thank you so much, dude. Give my best to everybody up there in Calgary, bro. America's getting weird. We're probably all going to come up there soon. So save me room up there, big dog.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
Dude, Canada is so great, man. And it's safe, too. That's the best thing about your stories, I noticed, is that you didn't get shot in one of them.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
But that don't count. You got to come to America to get shot, brother.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
We'll see what we can do. Well, look, right now you're probably an insurance risk, I would guess. Yeah. But yeah, dude, that's a good thing about Canada. They got knives. So you always stand a chance. You know, that's one thing I like.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
Well, you're alive today, man. And yeah, I do believe that you're here for a purpose. And even just sharing your story right here today, man, you know, resilience is huge. And I think the future is bright, brother. I believe that. And I'm just glad I got to talk to you today. And well, we got our first Canadian miracle right there, Matt. How do you say your last name? Tyberg.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
Matt Tyberg right there, ladies and gentlemen. If you don't believe in miracles, you got to believe in them now. That's what I feel like. And Matt, thanks for your time, dude. I look forward to catching up with you in a couple months.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
One of the, you know what I'm saying? He was in that cross. And, um, he's like come on hey he's like my cousin jeremy just got promoted to um whatever the top of the fire department, like lead arsonist or whatever. So he brings me, there's just a door. He, we go inside and it's a huge, it's like, everybody's like, Hey, you want some fire? It's like a fire department party.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
Matthew Tyberg right there. Let's see if we got one more call that came in here. Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
Willie Bones coming through, baby. Breaker Breaker 1-9, go through, Bones.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
Well, thanks for calling, Willie. The only things I know about this are I don't think you can quit cocaine without quitting alcohol. For me, that's what I've seen. I'm not saying that's everybody's case. That's for me. For me, that's what I've seen. And then let me think about what else. Yeah, I think you have to get into recovery. Now, if you're pretty bad off, first you need to go to a detox.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
And then once you're clean, then you need to get into a recovery program. You know, maybe a 30-day or an inpatient or then start to go to Cocaine Anonymous or Alcoholics Anonymous meetings with a friend. If you don't like Cocaine Anonymous meetings, I suggest Alcoholics Anonymous because there's more meetings and it's the same thing.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
Cocaine and alcohol aren't the same thing, but addiction is the same. So if you can, you can apply the same principles and you can talk to a sponsor about doing that. I wish I had some other cure for you. That's the only thing that I know that's ever helped me. So I wish you the best of luck, man. It's scary. You know what I realized too about drugs?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
For me, I was just too much of a pussy to do them really. Some people could get all fucked up and have a blast. I couldn't do that. I'd get all fucked up and squirrel away. I'd hide in your fucking mailbox, bitch. UPS, boy. I'll hide in your cousin's ass, boy. And take everybody's temperature in there, dog. Praise God, man. Thank you for calling, brother.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
And thank you guys again for all the support. We may add a few more shows to this tour. We're almost done with it. And I just want to let you know that. And Thank you to everybody that's come out. I can't even believe it. What else can I update you on? Oh, we're figuring out some of our stuff with the foundation and what we're going to do.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
Been doing some calls with different people and just figuring out how to make a positive difference in the world or in our community starting there. So that's something that's exciting. I want it to be in the recovery space.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
I don't know what it all looks like, but, um, in my spare time, I've been just discussing with other people who have done similar type things and, uh, and I just need to pray a little bit more and see if I can get more insight, you know, just to lead me to something. Um, Cause I, yeah, I mean, there's causes for sure.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
There's lots of things, but I want to, I want to, yeah, I want to land in a space that I'm going to feel motivated to keep doing, you know? Um, one more call that came in.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
Thanks, Lenora. That's sweet of you. I appreciate that. Yeah, that's just sweet of you to say. I feel, you know, I think I feel a little more purposeful sometimes in my life these days, I think. I think there was this moment kind of even when I had, whenever we talked with Cat Williams on the episode and he said, well, I was talking about, well, I don't know about this. I don't know about that.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
And I think this guy, Jeremy or something had just won like hose of the month or whatever. Like I think whoever's got the most PSI coming out of them, they give them, you know, you know, he'd done something, you know, it was an achievement for him. So all of his buddies are there and everybody, they're toasting and cheering and fucking like, hey, look at this mother, you know?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
And he's like, well, what don't you know? He's like, you're here. You're in this conversation right now. You're in this moment. So to keep second guessing everything, you know, you're here. Right? Like, like, cause I think there was something like, I don't know if we should talk about that. He's like, well, when are we going to talk about it?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
We have to talk about this is we're here talking about it. You know, in a lot of my life I've, I've, I've, I've been standing in, you know, I've been standing in the, in the water, but not really ready to get wet. But it's like, I'm in the water. you know, but it's like, I'm waiting for this. But there was this moment with him where he's just like, this is where you are.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
This is, and I don't mean me, but it's anybody. This is where this, if it's happening now, it's happening now. Like the, you know, Cause a lot of them, I'm always like, you know, this and later in there. And it's like, you know, so I do feel sometimes a little more purposeful. Um, I don't know even what that means exactly, but I just, I don't know.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
I start to feel a little bit more okay where I am, you know? And that, yeah, I believe that, um, yeah, I believe that God's given me a lot of neat stuff, opportunity. Um, like, you know, I believe that you guys have helped me learn like how to express like my feelings and learn about, um, yeah, just thinking and feeling together. We've done a lot of that on this program over the years.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
Um, and yeah, I think at some point it, you know, uh, There are positives from that, you know? And so I think, yeah, that's where I feel. I feel like a little bit like, there's a reason that all this has kind of happened and that there are some positives and let's start to maybe see what those are. And not just in me, but just like, yeah, what, what can be done as a group?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
What, what can, uh, start or be a part of starting, um, or what can we be a part of starting that could, uh, be of service? You know, I don't know. I don't know exactly what I'm saying, but I'm able to say it now more than I felt like I was in the past and feel like that's where I'm supposed to be. You gotta feel lucky to be alive, you know?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
Lucky to get to see certain things, and I think America's getting weird and interesting, and it's getting, like, good versus evil type shit, and I'm here for that shit. You know? I think we've all always wanted to live in, like, in the, uh, Gryffindor versus Slytherin type shit. Type shit! Um... But anyway, thank you. Thanks for the happy birthday wishes. What did I do?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
My buddy John Shahidi from... From Happy Dad sent me a gift. I haven't even opened it yet. My... Did my brother give me something? I don't know. My brother came in town too. And his buddy's friend was up here visiting their kid. Their kid was in show choir at the Grand Ole Opry. Or at the Opry Mills. So I got to spend some time with them. What else did we do?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
Took Mom to my favorite breakfast place. That was fun. Um... Oh, my mom did give me a gift. She got me an ounce of silver. You know, my mom was never a gold digger. She was a silver digger though. Shout out to silver diggers, dude. They don't end up with shit, but you know, But they're not gold diggers, dude. But my mom, like, you know, she's ready for like the end of things, right?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
And they're like, hey, if you ever have a fire, here's my number. Like, dude, I'm not... If there's a fire, I'm not looking through my phone. If there's a fire, you know, and I'm going to call Antonio up, you know, in the South Bronx, I'm calling the fire department. so they're just like, and then they gave me this shirt that we took some photos and they're like, cheers.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
So she's ready. She's like, when the banks go awry and all the, you know, everything falls apart online, you're going to have, you could have real silver and you can trade it for stuff. So she got me like an ounce of silver. So that was really cool. I never had that. And what else? Oh, I got a pair of boots. Bought myself a pair of boots that I really like. And what else did I do?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
Oh, I texted some of my friends that had the same birthday. Trying to think. Oh, I had to work. I had a podcast that I did with a hostage negotiator. That was pretty cool. So got to do that. And did I? Is that when I did that? Yep. Yeah. So that's what I did, man. I did the things, yeah, that I like to do on my birthday. I think I went and worked out. I got to podcast.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
I got to listen to some music with my mom. And it was great. And I'm grateful to be here with you guys today. And, yeah, thank you, Lenore, for the sweet message. And I don't know what that was. And thank you, everybody, for the support. And, yeah, the hotline is always, if you need it, 985-664-9503. And, yeah, there's a light out there for all of us, man, you know, for all types of people.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
And life sometimes, you know, you just don't get it the way you want it, but it's still, I don't know, sometimes you got to meet it halfway, man. Sometimes you got to put your own pickles on your chili, brother. But there's a light for all of us. You guys be good to yourselves, baby. You deserve it, man. Whenever you're down Out in the cold Faceless and untied Your story's untold Come take my hand
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
Two shots of fireball. The Bronx is burning. From the mountain tops and to the deepest valleys, we hear our voice calling you. Do the Trump! An arising sign, and in the darkest valley, you can be free.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
And then offer me, uh, they're like, Hey, you want some matches? Motherfucker, you know, keep us in business, keep us in business. They gave me like an eight pack of matches. That was like the cool looking, the old school, like regular looking match books. Um, they gave me this shirt. They're like, Hey, it's flammable. Um,
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
but yeah it was just like a great experience so shout out to them shout out to all the fire departments out there congratulations to the guy that got the promotion I dated a girl in junior high school her dad um great guy threatened to kill me once but outside of that awesome you know he was a fire chief and we used to go over there and watch him eat hot dogs and shit and uh
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
This was before a lot of firemen are getting in shape and stuff. Now, this is back when they were just over there just snorting Oscar Myers and shit and just squirting ketchup on each other's backs, you know? And, uh... And just basically just gambling, a lot of them. But anyway, I'm not sure what I'm talking about, what I'm rambling about.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
But that was the first time at her dad's fire department that I ever had chili in my life. That I ever had it. Somebody served it. I didn't know what it was. I had a little bit of it. And then I'd had it. You know, that's how that all works, you know. But you want a pack of chili? Yeah. You won't pick up on your belly. What else has been going on?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
Thank you to the people that have come out to the shows recently. We've done some dates. We went up to the Pacific Northwest. That was really amazing up there. So just the way the buildings are, the people, everybody, a lot of people, they look clean up there because it rains so much. You just get cleaned even if you're...
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
just not even if you're dirty yeah we did a huge show in Seattle that was amazing I think it maybe was too many people I know that sounds like a I'm grateful everybody came but I just never been in a venue and it was a it was a big venue right you know I just felt a little bad like maybe the people like some of the seats they it was hard to hear I don't know I think some of that's just a fear of mine but I don't think that we will do that again
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
But it's just a learning curve. And, yeah, we had a nice time there, though. I got to see Mac's girlfriend. We got to go to the fish market. Dude, you go to the fish market. I'd never been to the Seattle Fish Fair or whatever. It's like a little circus or whatever that they have every day. And people come, there's dead fish, and you can look at them, right? And you can eat them.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
Just clearing the winter out of my throat, baby. Be gone. Be gone, snow. Be gone, ice. Or hail. Dude, what is hail? It's basically, it's like Italian snow or whatever. I mean, that shit just f***s you up. It's like Memphis snow. It's like, what are we... It's definitely... I gotta look that up. What is hail?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
It's pretty Neanderthal-ic in a way. So anyway, we go, and Amir Kay, that's a guy that's touring with me, a great comedian, he points at the guys running the...
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
fish fair and so next thing you know they do a thing where you somebody throws a fish and somebody catches a fish and so they let me catch the fish and I fucking you know one toss one kill homie I gripped that bitch and yeah it was awesome I didn't know you're not supposed to spike it after you catch it so that that was I think frowned upon or whatever but I didn't know that and um and I've been watching too many of those grunt commercials or whatever and
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
Anyway, I'm rambling. What else is going on? Let's get into the episode. How about that? We got a bunch of calls that came in from you guys, and I'm going to focus on those today. I got one story. I went to the Grand Ole Opry's 100th anniversary. I'm going to talk about that. And we're going to speak to a miracle today, a gentleman named Matt up there in Canada, Calgary.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
He's up there, and he's a miracle, and we're going to get to have a moment with him. Let's go. Thank you for joining us. Whenever you're down light shining for you guiding your way helping From the mountaintops down to the deepest shadows. Um... You like pickles on your chili? You like pickles on your chili? You like pickles on your chili? Um... Yeah, my mother came in town for my birthday.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
Actually, it was last week. Thank you if you're wishing me a happy birthday in your head. And if you're not, and you're just like, dude, keep talking, that's fine. Um... She came in, and they had the 100th anniversary at the Grand Ole Opry. And my mom likes country music, and she likes older country music. And Blake Shelton was hosting the event, and Jelly Roll was going to perform.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
and my mom likes the likes both of them and so I was like oh well that would be fun for my birthday I'll have mom I'll see if mom wants to come in and then we'll go and so she came in and we went and uh what was it like we got dressed up kind of I didn't do a good job of it I what I wanted to wear didn't really fit once I put it on and so it was just you know
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
I just had to change it and wore a jacket, actually, that somebody had thrown on stage in Montana to a comedy show. I wore that. But, yeah, we went over there, and it was nice. Who performed? Oh, Alison Krauss performed. And, I mean, she has the voice of the evening that I heard. A lot of great voices in there, but my God. That was just exceptional. Clint Black, we got to listen to.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
Who's that other guy? Don't rock, did you? Alan Jackson. Just, it was awesome, man. We got to sit there and listen to some music together. And, you know, there was kind of a point in, like, there was one point we were sitting there, and this is kind of, I guess, a childish thought or whatever, but I was like...
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
You know, I kind of wish my mom would give me a little hug or hold my hand or something. I know that sounds crazy to say. I don't mean like hold my hand, but just kind of squeeze my hand. Just something, you know, like we don't see each other that much. And I don't know. This sounds crazy to say this kind of, I guess. But I've said a lot of weird shit over the years. Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
I was thinking, man, it would be nice if she gave me some sentimental but physical sign of affection. That's what I was thinking, right? And so I'm sitting there next to her, and then I just reached over and grabbed my mom's hand. That's what I did. And, and then we were just kind of held hands for maybe 30 seconds or something, you know, just put my hand on top of hers, let her know that I care.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
Because sometimes it's like you're relaxed and it's raining and then the rain's like, oh yeah, guess what, mother f***er. And it just f***ing shows up. And it just starts like pinging off your car, bouncing off your wife's shoulders and shit. It's bouncing off your stepson or whatever and it makes you care about him. Hail is just, yeah, we got to look into that and see what they're doing.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#572 - Pickle Chili
Um, and it was just something like for me, like a moment like that is interesting because a lot of my life, I would just sit there and be like, man, I wish there was this moment of affection. Um, but I wish somebody else would do it. Right. Or I, I'm upset that they're not doing it, you know? And then I just did it. I just reached over and yeah, my mom's an older lady, you know?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
We've got new merch. We've got these Onward hoodies. These are my favorite type of hoodie that we've ever used, the template, the material, the style of it. I think they'll be your favorite as well. We're going to try to focus on making sure that the template is perfect. So that it just feels good and that you enjoy it and that you keep it and wear it for a long time.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
That's unbelievable. And where you started – like – So that's why I was stretching.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
Well, you can get dysplasia too. That's one of the things that – So dogs get a lot.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
Resulting in abnormal fit between the ball and socket of the hip.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
Now, were there things where you're having to roll out your legs and stuff?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
It bothers... Yeah. You know, I do notice... I thought about this. Like, we're not supposed to just be sitting around. Like, imagine to say you went in the woods, right?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
It's just acting. Yeah. It's just acting on it, babe. Oh yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
Man, that's so wild. Thanks for sharing that, dude. When you were a kid, how long did it affect you? Say after the accident happened, how long was it like a daily thing that affected you probably?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
Yeah. Most of them are. Some of them are beating, killing. There's some...
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
Yeah, most are having a good time. Yeah, there's violence. A lot of it's by the streams. And so, you know, kind of... That's fun. Yeah, it's fun if you're into that.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
Yeah, it sounds like you don't remember things correctly.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
Because it was – they would donate it to you if you prayed a lot or something. So a mom would get a couple of prayers in and then you get free care for the kids or whatever. Good deal.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
No, it's okay, dude. But yeah, so yeah, she would put up, she would like make a bunch of deposits in the confessional or whatever. And then they gave you free childcare for the afterschool, right? And we had this one kid named Jeep was his name. He was named after a vehicle, right?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
So they named him Jeep. I was like, well, that's not how it works. But my buddy Scott's daddy was like, you know what? If he's being mean, you go up on that upper deck and hum a piece of concrete off at him.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
But you talked about on a new podcast. You have a new podcast. Wait, I know this with the guys from Workaholics. You guys started a new podcast.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
That's what I'm saying is I think nature's a blast, right?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
You see it. They're herding the animals. The woodpecker comes down. He makes noise, and people are like, get the fuck out of here.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
It's rare that you have a show, right? Like Workaholics, which was such a hit. And then you now get to have an experience where you guys are still kind of together, even podcasting, right? Mm-hmm. And with Gemstones ending. Mm-hmm. What's it like when something big like that ends? What's it like when a project that you've done for a few years ends?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
I know even just doing a small movie that it was like the last day. It felt like the last day of school. And we were kind of close, but it had only been maybe 30 days.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
Yeah, he's obviously been using or whatever. He's one of the animals that got a hold of a bag somewhere. Absolutely. Who else is rolling up like that?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
Unless he's like Morse coding a message from the heavens or from like ACDC or something, you know. But, you know, I'm sure every animal, they all conjoinively hate that MF-er.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
When they see, unless one person had to get up early for work and then he's like, guys, I had to invite him.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
Get $50 in Pick 6 credits. Better payouts, bigger wins. Only with Pick 6 from DraftKings. The crown is yours.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
Shout out to Dave Ramsey, my friend. He invited me to a get together at his home in a few months. I'm looking forward to that. And I was grateful when I had him on the show. Dave keeps it real. He He's been there for a long time for people reliable, no fluff, no fancy words, just straight up truth about money. Dave's been doing it for 30 years.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
He's a financial expert, eight-time bestselling author, and the host of The Ramsey Show. That's a Monday through Friday show where Dave and his team take calls from real people dealing with real money situations. Some are in deep and some just need a little guidance. But all of them are looking for a way forward. They've had some wild calls. My wife maxed out her credit cards at McDonald's.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
I was dumped because I worked too much. And should I pay for my wife to get plastic surgery? Big questions facing Americans. But it's not about the crazy stories. The Ramsey Show helps people take control, get a plan, and change their lives. Nearly 40 million people watch The Ramsey Show on YouTube. It dominates Apple Podcasts and Amazon Music Charts.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
We, I'm just saying, so stretching like is, um, oh, you said sitting down.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
So if you want to get your money right or just hear some of the wildest financial situations people get into, The Ramsey Show has it. Check out The Ramsey Show weekdays on YouTube, podcasts, or click the link in the show notes. Yeah, he's just like, I don't know. It's tough because you want to impress him, but you also want to just learn about him. There was a lot of little stuff.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
And to know that he liked the directing side and the thinking about and the program, that he thinks about that more than it seems like he does probably the acting side. Not as a judgment. Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
So I'm just saying, yeah, I don't know if we're supposed to be sitting down. Like say if you went into nature. Yep. And you saw a bunch of animals. They were doing stuff, scratching their backs on trees, eating berries and tickling each other or whatever. And then there's one animal off to the side who's sitting in a chair and he's vaping or working on his computer. Yep.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
no no no that's right that's the stuff that he talked about why he even got into things that's the stuff that he likes the most like he's like i won't really go back and watch things i like to just be there in that moment when things are trying to are chaotic and how do we figure it out and i was like wow that's kind of fascinating he's a really smart guy he went to film school first and like so he came into the business wanting to be a writer and a director
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
Yeah. Next, all you need is a lumber truck and it's a wrap, dude.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
Yeah, those are really great. I want you to check them out. They're at theovonstore.com. And thank you for your support if you choose to purchase one. Today's guest is an actor. He's a comedian. He's a writer. He's... Hell, he was hit by a damn car. You know him from Workaholics and the Righteous Gemstones. He has his own podcast with the guys from Workaholics called This Is Important.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
Yeah, my body starts to, the top starts to lean forward.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
Three Little Pigs roofers? We used to have that group. Oh, I don't know.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
You know, some sweet treats. Time for some hand magic.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
Man, the mainstream media is a big machine. I believe that that's conclusive. There's no more debating that. They shape stories. They hide parts. So we're never really seeing the whole picture. Before you know it, you're stuck in this echo chamber, just getting one side of the story over and over. That's how the algorithms work. That's why I like Ground News.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
It lets you see how different news outlets cover the same story left, right, center. You compare it all in one spot and think for yourself. For example, there's this article right here on Ground News that says White House narrows April 2nd tariffs. Then you can go to another, all the headlines are right there, and you can see all the headlines from the different news sites all on the same page.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
I don't think we've had something like this where you can really, you can shop for your news and look at basically the nutrition facts of it and see, well, which site is giving me the real thing, which site has the most bias in it. You can compare the same headlines, the same articles, From one site to the next, all in one spot. Expand your view of the news. Go to groundnews.com slash Theo.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
That's G-R-O-U-N-D-N-E-W-S dot com slash T-H-E-O to get 40% off the Advantage plan and get access to the mobile app, website, and exclusive newsletters. One more time, that's groundnews.com slash T-H-E-O. You have to go check this out. I've never seen anything like it actually. I think it's kind of what we've all been wanting.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
You all know I like to keep things cool, even in the winter, and nothing is cooler than a blue cube cold plunge. I'm fortunate enough to have one at home, and let me tell you, it's like baptizing your soul by getting that little crispy bucket, baby. It gets rid of them demons we all have and makes you feel great for seven or eight hours afterwards. It's good.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
My buddy Thomas Schiffer, the genius behind Blue Cube, and I go way back, and he just launched a presale for their new stand-up cold plunges. Wow. These things are the Cadillacs of cold plunge therapy. American-made, full immersion, weatherproof frames, and built like a Sherman tank. I'll say this, they are built well.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
And because you're listening to me, you can get a sweet discount when you mention my name. That's right. Just tell them Theo sent you and they'll knock a good bit off the price. So if you're ready to boost your metabolism, eliminate inflation and blast away your anxiety, give them a call. Head over to their website, bluecubebaths.com, and dive into the details.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
Opt in on their website or give them a call. I am grateful for the one that I have, and I feel honestly thankful to be able to have one. I know they're not in everybody's price range, and that's understandable. But at the same time, I want to support my friend and his amazing company. Is pornography causing a problem in your life?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
Do you find yourself watching porno for longer periods of time and having trouble stopping? Is porn affecting your relationship or dating life? Well, you're certainly not alone. Watching pornography has become so commonplace today, and oftentimes men use porn to numb the pain of loneliness, boredom, anxiety, and depression.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
Shame and stigma prevent men from talking about these issues and getting help for them. I want to introduce you to my friend Steve. Steve is the founder of Valor Recovery, a program to help men overcome porn abuse and sexual compulsivity.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
Steve is a long-term sexual recovery member and has personally overcame the emotional and spiritual despair of abusing pornography and has dedicated his life to empowering men to do the same. Steve is an amazing person and he is a close friend of mine. I mean that. Valor Recovery helps men to develop the tools necessary to have a healthier sex life.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
Their coaches are in long-term recovery and will be your partner, mentor, and spiritual guide to transcend these problematic behaviors. To learn more about Valor Recovery, please visit them at www.valorrecoverycoaching.com or email them at admin at valorrecovery. recoverycoaching.com thank you
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
He was listening to, I think, a lot of Morissette or something, walking with his headphones on.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
Yeah, for all those things hit rock bottom. You know what? I will say this because they need different types of – because your Jim Stone character, his job is he's a youth pastor.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
Yeah, who keeps just talking about Jessica Simpson all the time.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
I think they should. They should allow if there's just, you know, or maybe they don't have to make it exclusive or include just make it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. But now there's more like, yeah, there's just more gay people everywhere now and more common.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
The craziest thing was he'd been listening also to Train earlier.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
Where was he? In what district was he hitting people? In what section of the country did he even?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
Yeah. Why do people – it amazes me that people get hit on train tracks.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
But I think that joke only works if he had been listening to the train earlier.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
I think you get the hang of it quick. I think I would commandeer an area of a park. That's what I would do.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
Ron's slinging yotes, yeah. Ron's got a fresh batch of yote on the grill.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
So you'd be high-end homeless then because you're –
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
Yeah, we did a good job. But yeah, you believe that they're noise canceling and then you're like, no, they're not that noise canceling. He couldn't hear a train coming. That's wild.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
But they're going to call the police immediately. Poor people would just be like, oh, there's a – that's going to be me in a week.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
You could tell him straight up, hey, I'm going to be back behind your house. I'll live back there every now and then.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
Let's go to this quora right there. It says the top one. It says, do homeless people ever get territorial? Yeah, dude.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
He said one of the problems is, though, this is one of the big mistakes that hobos make. Because are hobos technically people that ride the trains?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
Yeah. A hobo is a migrant worker in the United States. Hobos, tramps, and bums are generally regarded as related but distinct. A hobo travels and is willing to work. A tramp travels but avoids work if possible. A bum neither travels nor works.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
Yeah. My house was... The house we just saw the photo in with the baby and the boat in the yard?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
You got to put both legs down. Put like this. If you don't know if it's really a strong kickback, have your wife lean against your back like this with her arm up.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
And you got to pop off. I think if somebody... You know, I don't know. It's like if somebody came in your room, what would you do? Say you wake up, right? You think there's somebody in your room.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
I'll shoot ya! You start playing that video from Home Alone. Oh, yeah, yeah. The burglars. You dirty animals. Keep the change. They're laughing so hard in the other room, the burglars.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
We got to steal from here more often. Will you keep a home? God, you've had a life riddled with things, man. Yeah, dude. I didn't realize that.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
You've had a lot of riddling going on. Will you keep a home in Charleston? Are you glad to be gone from Charleston?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
Almost had – didn't have to get a cease and restraining or whatever, but it got close to just loitering late at night.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
But that was, yeah, I love it there. I mean, it's amazing. Yeah, Danny McBride said that you and Tony would go and work out a lot over there. Was that a real thing?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
I'm trying to think of a job that I would see. Say if I saw you, oh, mailman, son of – son of mailman.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
Proud. Son of a mailman who's trying to make his father proud.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
Dude, can you believe that male is still a thing? Getting male. Can you believe that right now as we talk, sometime today –
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
It's always a fun time with my friend, Adam Devine.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
Yeah, but can you believe somebody's going to do that today? Instead of just emailing us and telling us what they need to tell us, somebody's going to drive over to our house. Yeah, that's wild.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
It used to just be like discounts on avocados and stuff, but now it's like the mail has gotten really, really crazy, man. It's gotten pretty rogue, I feel like.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
AEW. Righteous Jim Simms star Adam Devine hits up AEW.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
Good. I do know him. I really, yeah, he's an exceptional guy.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
So obviously he's been going through a lot, you know. He said these lips haven't seen a school lunch in two years.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
You guys have the same menstrual cycle or something.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
Well, I don't understand. It's like, you're the foodie boys. What are you talking about?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
Yeah. Well, I just think – Yeah, I just, I don't know. There's, yeah, I guess, am I hating on children now? What am I doing? You're right. Yeah, it's okay. I'm excited for them.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
At least do soup or something. At least I want to see them evolve a little.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
Well, just a four-minute conversation about... Pepperoni on – but no information. That's the thing. It's astounding to have four people and walk away from each conversation they do with zero information at all.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
No. So a lot of nerve damage. Was that thing just hanging on? What happened? Because that looks kind of rekindled.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
Oh, you did. Well, you have a lot of, um, you seem like you've been through a lot.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
That was a little wild for me. That guy who did that was starting to be, he was doing a lot of drugs and he was secretly probably touching men in his car or whatever. Men who wanted it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
That Body Wars thing that comes to all the exhibits, you know, Body World. I think it's called Body World, I believe. And it's also – Body World is pretty incredible, man.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
He like suddenly had a condom in his wallet or something. Or it was like suddenly he was like – he would be like, if the girls come, let me talk to them.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
Yeah, there's nothing you can do to suddenly be in the cool group. And then, like, he was able to talk to older guys now suddenly.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
Really? Since you said that, everyone in the world has agreed with that exactly, including a lot of agencies. It's like, well, look, if we can't get him in a Marvel movie, what are we going to do?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
That's a new way to do a gender reveal, I think. The exhibit is set up so that one starts at the skeletal system.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
How much budget do you need to make an independent movie, though?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
This is Mark Duplass right here. He's made a lot of great stuff.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
But yeah, once she did that, it kind of put you in the hot seat.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
I was like blaming having a kid on just her. Yeah, it's her fault. What are you doing having this fucking kid?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
You're supposed to read the, it says on the wall in there, do not lick on the way out.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
Adam Devine, man. Theo Vaughn. Thanks so much, dude, for hanging out.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
I'm glad to see you. You're physically doing okay. Your family's growing. We got to keep making fun – you have to keep making fun stuff. This was one thing that I thought was really exceptional that Danny McBride said. He goes, you know, I don't know if Hollywood knew that they wanted Eastbound because people are always like, why don't they make shit like Eastbound and Down anymore?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
And he's like, nobody was asking us for something like Eastbound and Down. Nobody was asking us for something like Vice Principal. It was like we just made it and then said we know this is funny and then they jump on it because – You can't expect them to think of the next thing. That's not what they do anymore. He didn't say that's not what they do anymore, but that's what I start to realize.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
If you wait forever to get somebody to sign off on your thing, then it might not happen. You just have to go and try and figure it out. And investing in yourself. That's what I realized.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
You know, but yeah, it's tough. It's tough. It's tough to figure it out. And obviously you and I are, we're speaking from a place where, you know, we can afford to try and make a project. So it's like, you know, not trying to sound like knowing that there's not a barrier to entry to that for regular folks.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
I agree. It's so different now that you can get a camera. You can get a phone.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
I think you are, dude. Survivor of Cement Truck. Uh-huh. You know, the guys fought in the AEW. The fourth season of Righteous Gemstones going on right now. New projects in the works. The podcast, you can lock in, listen to Adam have ideas, think about things, share everyday stuff on his life with some of the stars.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
And here's a little bit of Real Bodies exhibit and you just get to see the texture. That's what this reminds you of. You have a very kind of beef jerky from the knees down. But smooth. But smooth. No, it's nice.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#571 - Adam Devine
Yeah, I could just... Sorry. No, don't be. I like it. I haven't heard it in a while. I saw you stretching a little bit. Was that what I saw? Yeah, you did.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#578 - Ben Affleck
You know life's better with a good hack, like learning the secret menu at your favorite restaurant or stumbling upon a buy one get one sale at the mall. Well, there's a wireless hack too, and it's called Visible. Visible's like ordering from the secret menu in wireless. You get unlimited data and hotspot. And plans start at just $25 a month for one line. Taxes and fees included.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#578 - Ben Affleck
I wonder if you lose vanity as you get a little bit older. Like not you, but like do – what does that happen?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#578 - Ben Affleck
Dude, that's fast. That's insider baseball, man. No, I could, it makes total sense. it makes total sense that that would start to affect how we see things. You know, there's something that's happening where it's hard to get people to believe in some of these movies, you know? And people's attention spans have changed. It's gotten interesting.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#578 - Ben Affleck
You know what I mean? Oh, like the guy who's on Celebrity Big Brother right now. Who's that guy?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#578 - Ben Affleck
Do you think you wanted to start directing because it gave you even more of a sense of accomplishment?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#578 - Ben Affleck
And now it's different because I think the movie theater, you know, it's like— It's a new attack. I think it takes novel thinking these days. I think it takes – I think that movies themselves, long form, I think it's – they're going to have to find some new – unless it is like – great or new or so novel, they're going to have to find some new ways to either present it or edit it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#578 - Ben Affleck
I'm not sure what it is, but to me, just as a viewer, it feels like we're in this shift because so quickly have people gotten into these quick moments and it's not even that their attention span is short, their commitment. It's like, they don't want to, it's like, I'm not committing to that.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#578 - Ben Affleck
Or a tattoo. A guy came through with a tattoo and it told a story.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#578 - Ben Affleck
And so you had to like, it looked like a domestic dispute a lot, but you're like, Hey, you know, there's every, there's a story for everything. But dude, even like this, like Danny McBride gave me this like two, like a month ago or something. This light, it's like a flashlight or something. Well, this side, just like a flashlight. Right. But the other side is like a wiener light.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#578 - Ben Affleck
Like you can put like a wiener on something. It has like a, but I'm just saying like everything has like two, like seven things. Right. Right. Ready to win some real cash during the basketball playoffs? Check out Pick 6 from DraftKings. When it comes to basketball payouts, DraftKings Pick 6 posterizes the competition. Hit all your picks and score higher minimum payouts on Pick 6.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#578 - Ben Affleck
Yeah, that's kind of what I was thinking of Mickey Rourke, I think. Yeah, no, no judgment against him. But he, you know, it's like you can it's definitely an active. Yeah, some people it's like an active thing. And then you're in a real kind of like conundrum with yourself because you have to get old to you. You would constantly be feeling depressed.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#578 - Ben Affleck
Plus, even more cash if you outscore the competition. Pick six is available in most states, including Missouri, California, Texas, Georgia, and more. I've had a good experience with pick six from DraftKings. I like to get my picks in there. I like to get Jokic and more than 13 rebounds. And I like to get Anthony Edwards out there and more than 21 points. That's how it is.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#578 - Ben Affleck
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#578 - Ben Affleck
You know, like a buy one, get one at the mall or a combo meal or even just a nickname. You know, that's Bartholomew there, but we call him Bart. That's a hack. But what if I told you there was a wireless hack?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#578 - Ben Affleck
wireless that lets you live in the know well there is and it's called visible visible is the ultimate wireless hack it's unlimited wireless that puts you in control you get unlimited data and hotspots you can stay connected on the go and it's powered by verizon visible runs on verizon's 5g network so you get great coverage, fast speeds, seamless connection.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#578 - Ben Affleck
Visible also gives you access to 4K streaming. Ready for wireless that lets you live in the know? Make the switch at visible.com. That's V-I-S-I-B-L-E dot com. Plans starting at $25 a month. For our best features, get the new Visible Plus Pro plan for $45 a month. Terms apply. See visible.com for plan features and network management details.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#578 - Ben Affleck
But I'm just saying, like, everything has, like, seven things now. Right. And I think you're right.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#578 - Ben Affleck
Would you come out and say it was good if it wasn't?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#578 - Ben Affleck
And how do you decide who is a good director? Because you're a good director yourself.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#578 - Ben Affleck
Oh, yeah. Against Canada. America versus Canada, I think. Or something. Russia. Right. Yeah, Russia, the original. Oh, no, Russia's like dirty Canada. Yeah, it's kind of like, and that's, yeah, no offense to anybody who's Russian, but also, you know it. So it's not like we're keeping secrets from them. We're advertising that. So is it, would you go work on it?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#578 - Ben Affleck
So if you and Jon Bernthal, you guys are buddies, you get along well? I love the guy. Yeah, I knew him.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#578 - Ben Affleck
It's got Tim Dillon. Have you ever seen Tim Dillon? No. What about him? Oh, you just got to watch him, dude. He's so funny. He's just one of the funniest guys he ever made. He just made me think like he's somebody that's really funny. Shane Gillis.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#578 - Ben Affleck
I've heard a lot of neat things about him because he podcasts as well. I think he has. He might have to take breaks from it if he's acting a lot. How long are you shooting something like that? And then are there phases during a movie shoot where it's like – It starts off, you know, it's like, and you just kind of get burnt out.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#578 - Ben Affleck
I love John. Do, um, have you ever made, yeah. Cause David Spade and I wrote a movie that we just shot a couple months ago. Oh, really? Yeah. So it was fascinating. I've just kind of learned about how to do it. Like we've been friends for about- How long did you shoot for? Four years. We shot for 23 days and we got- That's pretty quick. It was. It was quick. We got pushed by the fire.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#578 - Ben Affleck
So everything kind of got messed up and we kind of, not everything got messed up, but we got like sandwiched in a moment where it was like, everybody's here. The winds are 40 miles an hour today. We have to shoot. There's no, we paid for it ourselves. So it was like, we have to do this.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#578 - Ben Affleck
Did you find out when people have your own money on something, all of a sudden it's like, okay, we're going to do this. Like-
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#578 - Ben Affleck
They're like, oh, we need a Dalmatian. I'm like, we don't have a Dalmatian. We'll fucking shave that sheep and fucking staple some – Tattoo some spots on this motherfucker and shoot. And with removable glue, glue some Oreos to it and get that bastard out there. Teach it to bark. We have 40 minutes. Get on YouTube and teach that thing to bark.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#578 - Ben Affleck
Have you ever made a movie that you didn't put out or that wasn't put out? Oh, yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#578 - Ben Affleck
Yeah, dude. It seems exciting. Well, here's the thing. I think when you tell me that it's good, I honestly think that I believe you that it's going to be good. I'm telling the truth.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#578 - Ben Affleck
It was like, it was a bomb. The movie's a bomb. You're up there at night in your Batman costume just painting over it with one of those big paint reachers. Dude, did you ever see Family Man? Did you see that movie? Yeah. I love that movie, man. Oh, yeah. Family Man I liked really a lot. Dunkirk I liked. I thought it was cool.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#578 - Ben Affleck
Yeah, it's just bus boys. He's like a guy. We're just two kind of dumb guys or whatever. We just got the first edit through, so it's like I'm watching it right now, man.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#578 - Ben Affleck
It's been tough because I've been spending my nights watching.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#578 - Ben Affleck
It's the worst feeling in the world. It feels fucking horrible because it's like I'm very particular about what I create. Like you said in the beginning, it's like I like to make things, I know what I want. I know my intuition, and if I fail on my intuition, then that's exactly where I want to fail because that's pure to me, right? Like that's okay.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#578 - Ben Affleck
Plus, Visible runs on Verizon's 5G network for great coverage, fast speeds, and a seamless connection. And it's all digital. Don't like going to the phone store? Visible doesn't have them. You switch from your phone and manage your plan in an app. Now that's a hack. If you're ready for wireless that lets you live in the know, make the switch at visible.com. Plans start at $25 a month.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#578 - Ben Affleck
So it's hard to know if it would seem like you seem like a guy who likes being in Hollywood or doesn't like being in Hollywood, I guess.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#578 - Ben Affleck
That's the thing. And it's like, I'm so particular. I'm not particular. But I just know what kind of has worked, you know?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#578 - Ben Affleck
No, no, no. I just think like, yeah, like this is why this was written this way and this is why it's funny. And so this is the first time that we're like more hands on with it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#578 - Ben Affleck
We needed an owl one day. We had an owl, right? This bitch, it was $1,100 an hour. For an owl? Yeah, it was like a semi-endangered. I don't want to say endangered or whatever, but it was like.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#578 - Ben Affleck
It's like, God, you get into there and there's just all this animal entrapment. I – what else was I thinking about? Would you let your children – well, I want to talk to you a little bit more about directing. So – because Argo you directed, right? And did you care about the Middle East that much? Were you like a Middle East guy? I know you – I read some of the –
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#578 - Ben Affleck
Yeah. Oh yeah. That's true. Right. As a dad, you just like that. Is that, is that gotta be tougher when you're a dad? Like you kind of have already lived some life. So you were like, and not even about acting, it's about anything.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#578 - Ben Affleck
And then your kid is kind of like making it like, is that, and you don't want to like probably push them too much or like, because then you're pressure some dude, that's gotta be a real, like walking up police line or something.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#578 - Ben Affleck
Oh, for sure. If you're in the rest of the world, it feels so far away. And then you forget after you're here for a while how far away it seems to other people. Like if you meet, you know, like just anybody who was in and it just like that's like it was a little.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#578 - Ben Affleck
Yeah, that's crazy. I never even thought about that. It's like you're watching them walk and there's something kind of in their path and if you take it away completely, then they're not gonna learn how to deal with an obstacle. But if you leave it there, then you're gonna have to watch them go through an obstacle. That's got to be crazy.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#578 - Ben Affleck
Yeah. You'd have no experience. And you also, it sharpens your intuition. You start to, it all learns. It's all it is. If you can see yourself as a tool, sometimes it's definitely harder when you're younger because some of those feelings are new and it hurts so much, you know?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#578 - Ben Affleck
What is, um, what's something that you admire about each of your children just so one day they can look back and, and, um,
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#578 - Ben Affleck
Yeah. You know what I mean? Yeah, dude, I'm always trapped inside of myself. There's always like a lot of this, like, so we were like, you don't like being in a crowd. I'm like, I have a crowd inside of me right now. There's a crowd in my head. It's busy enough. I got 30 people in here and we're out of hors d'oeuvres. So I got enough fucking problems on the interior right now.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#578 - Ben Affleck
No, but I feel like something you admire like individually about him that's maybe unique. I think my oldest kid.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#578 - Ben Affleck
That's nice, man. Yeah, it's nice to hear dads talk about their kids. I think sometimes you just don't hear it enough sometimes.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#578 - Ben Affleck
There's not as many male leaders and not as many male teachers as there were. There's a space where we're missing a gap of mentorship from male to male because a lot of people, well, some people were pedophiles or whatever, but outside of those people, it's like there's not as many. Let's rule those fuckers out. Those guys are out.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#578 - Ben Affleck
Well, also anybody pop onto, he's driving around taking pictures of kids. Anybody else would be arrested for taking a photo of a kid in public.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#578 - Ben Affleck
Oh, yeah, dude. Did you have a fun, like, do you have a memory of your dad that was, like, fun for you? I'm trying to think of one. My dad would, dude. My dad was, like, my dad was really old when I was born. And so my dad was 70 when I was born, right? He was born in 1910.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#578 - Ben Affleck
So I can totally relate to that. And every time there is an... And then we'll get off this.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#578 - Ben Affleck
Yeah. I wish he had some money, which was crazy. Because usually if a woman's hooking up with an older guy, he's got some money. He's got some money. What did your dad have going for him? It was not money, dude. It wasn't money? It must have been charming. He didn't have a bank. Listen, he was very charming. My dad was very, very charming. But he would take me to the –
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#578 - Ben Affleck
he would like go sometimes have a beer by like this bar at the railroad tracks. And he would like, let me walk on the bar. He'd like, and they had like these little bowl of chocolates or whatever. And if the bartender, I remember if I danced good, she would like give me some, some of the chocolates or whatever. And he'd be like, go wiggle for chocolates or whatever.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#578 - Ben Affleck
And I remember, I just remember, I think. You're like when my dad pimped me out. That was a good time. Yeah. Well, he was just pimping me for confections or sugars. It was kind of an outtake from that movie Chocolat, if you've ever seen that. But yeah, he would be like, go wiggle for chocolates. And I just remember that was one thing that I remember. Anyway, sorry. I made that about me.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#578 - Ben Affleck
Yeah, it's fun. There's things I remember about it, like the bowls of peanuts and just being in a bar at 5 p.m. Because my dad was older, he would rest pretty early. Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#578 - Ben Affleck
I want to talk, I know you, I want to talk to you about directing and acting, but, um, because yeah, I was just, I was like this bit is so, cause they always get pictures of you where you seem like you're like the, the, the dwarf that like is kind of like the backup dwarf, you know, like you're on the side, you're smoking.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#578 - Ben Affleck
Yeah. I think that's something that we probably learn. I think as we go along, um, I want to tell you about true classic God, uh, You want to feel good. You want to feel something good on your body and look good to people. True classic. The official basics wear partner of the UFC has one mission to make sure guys look good and feel even better.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#578 - Ben Affleck
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#578 - Ben Affleck
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#578 - Ben Affleck
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#578 - Ben Affleck
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#578 - Ben Affleck
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#578 - Ben Affleck
Yeah. He's an understudy. He's the understudy dwarf. Okay. And not dwarf, like you're a regular-heighted guy, but it's like – and I shouldn't have said dwarf. I shouldn't say anything. But it was like – I don't know. It's like they only put this chronology out of you that makes you seem like you're kind of bummed.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#578 - Ben Affleck
What else is something I want to ask you about? Did you – was it weird? Were you – Were you famous before your brother was famous? Is that a weird question?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#578 - Ben Affleck
He's amazing in that movie. Yeah. Yeah. It was so good. Is it, um, yeah, it is a great actor. My brother is it, uh, yeah. Are you guys pretty close?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#578 - Ben Affleck
And, you know, you know. I guess you get through phases in life, too, where you're kind of like people are you're kind of doing the same thing or you're just in different spaces.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#578 - Ben Affleck
Yeah, you know, I'll tell you this. So there was, I live in Nashville. So I moved there about four years ago. And there was, so the other night there was like tornadoes or something. And I didn't know. And I live in like, it's a nice neighborhood, but it's nothing crazy. It's not like rich enough where you're away from tornadoes, you know.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#578 - Ben Affleck
you better be pretty, how rich you have to be to get away from tornadoes. I don't know. I'm still in the wind district, you know? So there's a fricking tornado warning. There's sirens going off over town. I didn't even know we had sirens. So I'm texting my nephew. Thank God. I called him twice. And then finally I texted him. I was like, dude, uh, I was like, bro, tornado warning. What do I do?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#578 - Ben Affleck
And he's in middle school or whatever. And thank God he's like, get under your desk. That's what he fucking says at 4 a.m. And I was like, dude, I don't have a fucking desk. You know what I'm saying? And he goes, don't curse at me over text. And I'm like, this fucking kid does not know how to support a family member. Yeah. That's hilarious.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#578 - Ben Affleck
Anyway, I don't even know what I told you that story about. Were we talking about weather? I don't know. Oh, family members. Oh, yeah. And what it's like to be an uncle. Yeah. I get to see my nieces, and they're coming for Easter tomorrow, so I'm excited about that. But yeah, being an uncle is so much fun.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#578 - Ben Affleck
I got five total. One of them just went to prom, so I got to be there when she took pictures. I was in Baton Rouge for that. Oh, that's great. It's fun, yeah. And you kind of get to be, like, a little bit of the confidant. Like, you're kind of, like, on the edge of dad.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#578 - Ben Affleck
But it's like, and you got to know when to snitch to on them too. And tell the dad what's going on. Exactly. Did you, let me think about a movie thing. Oh, did you get to keep your Batman outfit? I did. Yeah, I did.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#578 - Ben Affleck
Oh, yeah. You'd see, like, some guy just with his... Yeah, you'd see some guy in your neighborhood who's on the wrestling team or whatever. Yeah, wrestlers. Yeah, exactly. He had a wrestling team and then he's running down...
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#578 - Ben Affleck
Trying to lose 15 pounds in 10 minutes. You know what I mean? He's just spitting on his family members and he's just cursing because they say cursing helps you burn calories or whatever. Yeah, that's kind of interesting. But you never put it back on for anything fun or to surprise family members?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#578 - Ben Affleck
Yeah, they don't really tell you kind of, because it's almost like you're like... Yeah, I don't know. I just watched my brother have nephews. Like, I want to get a wife and children.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#578 - Ben Affleck
You know what I mean? You got to start to slowly separate in those ways that kids do it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#578 - Ben Affleck
You know what I mean? And then there's that moment, it's the first time you kind of close the door and there's that moment where the dad's just by the door and he's kind of sad that he's in the hall, but then he goes in his room, he takes three steps and he's like, oh, good, I got some free time. But there is that moment.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#578 - Ben Affleck
And they come back around, you know what I mean? Do you think – I auditioned for a Project Greenlight movie that you guys had years ago. Really? Yeah, it was one where there was like a guy in a wheelchair and there were like dangerous people were coming in like you were trapped in a bar or something. Feast, maybe the horror movie. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I just remembered that. That's crazy.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#578 - Ben Affleck
You auditioned for it? Really? Yeah. Oh, I was not any good. That's wild. I'm not a good at it. I think it's a bad idea to do that. But anyway, I just remembered that. It popped in my head. Do you still have Project Greenlight? No.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#578 - Ben Affleck
That's exactly what, that's exactly what that whole system is really.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#578 - Ben Affleck
He seems like a surgeon when he's talking about it. and the way he breaks down certain moments, and how long it takes to do certain things. He's like, well, they got about this many yards. They're going to have to move about this many yards a second. Like, he's definitely – you start to see who he really is.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#578 - Ben Affleck
And they're like, they're already open. I remember I was, I kept blacking out and then I had to like do some scene that I didn't even care about. What are we doing here? Why are we doing that? I'm sorry. That was not a plan. Um, Oh yeah, dude, I want to tell you about the, you ever see that Dunkin' Donuts commercial? Cause I know you did a commercial with them. Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#578 - Ben Affleck
You ever see the one where they shut down that one? And, uh, uh, is it boy show boy? What is it? I play. Shamokin. Duncan's clothes. My favorite dude.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#578 - Ben Affleck
Yeah. It's, it's such a, it's that whole thing gets really black mirrorish, man. You know, it really gets kind of like, um,
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#578 - Ben Affleck
Yeah, anyway, that's just it. When that one closed down, man, it was just like a real, people kind of went bananas on the internet.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#578 - Ben Affleck
Like, all right. Yeah. You don't know. When a Dunkin' Donuts closes down, you don't realize how many lives intersect in that one place. The whole community is paralyzed. What's something else that you want to direct, man? Is there something? What about you directing Timothee Chalamet? That'd be so dope.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#578 - Ben Affleck
So you almost have to plan ahead, like, okay, maybe they're going to be on a semester abroad or this is going to be going on.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#578 - Ben Affleck
Yeah, man. Cause we, yeah, we got to keep telling good stories cause it's important. That's how people learn things and that's how you remember things and they become part of like, you know, history. They really kind of tell history a lot of times. Um, yeah, it's definitely interesting about, Oh, you said something about, Oh yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#578 - Ben Affleck
The shooting in Hollywood has become so tough, but it's supposed to, it's supposed to be getting easier.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#578 - Ben Affleck
Now you have 3,000 people flying to, like, Tibet or whatever to shoot for, you know... Like, the UK, they give out... They do these big... Oh, yeah, Louisiana did it for a long time.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#578 - Ben Affleck
Well, I'm amazed that I was talking about this with somebody and it may have been, damn, I can't remember. My brain's off on the weekend. But we're talking about how California hasn't really done a great job of like,
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#578 - Ben Affleck
kind of museuming some of the all a lot of great parts about that were in movies and like you know Sidney Poitier this is where he lived for 20 years or you know this is the Bad News Bears park where they play Brady Bunch house right there's some of it and it's like bits and pieces on the internet but it doesn't seem as preserved like when you get here you almost think I know it would seem like more of a museum in itself the city because at the time I think people just didn't think about it or somebody's house they went to whatever it was but yeah they haven't really I mean you know you can do some of these tours and stuff but
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#578 - Ben Affleck
It's really good. You heard that. Ben Affleck, thanks, man. Thanks for coming in and just sharing and thinking with me and just having a good time.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#578 - Ben Affleck
We're excited. I promise that I'll go see it. Thank you. And I think a lot of people will. I hope so.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#578 - Ben Affleck
For our best features, get the new Visible Plus Pro plan for $45 a month. Terms apply. See visible.com for plan features and network management details. Today's guest is an actor, a writer, a director. He's won an Oscar award. You know his movies, like Good Will Hunting, Gone Girl, Batman. The list goes on. He has a new film, The Accountant 2. It's in theaters this Friday with Jon Bernthal.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#578 - Ben Affleck
That's it. Oh, dude. Yeah. I don't even think of it. I don't know if I graduated that when some of them, they let you skip, I guess, if you're, you know, depending on what county you're in, but they hold you back. Um, bro, the scariest thing was when like the dumb bully kid got held back and you're like, you had to stick around in your grade.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#578 - Ben Affleck
And you're like, bro, I remember we got word six, 10 and in like sixth grade, dude, we got word that Damien had gotten held back and people were like, Oh hell no, dude. We cannot do Damien again. Hold me back, too. We cannot do Damien again. Like, Damien has to go out to pasture wherever they put these kids that leave sixth grade. And they're like, Damien's coming back.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#578 - Ben Affleck
Finish their education at sixth grade. Shut him down, dude. Tase him or something. You know, put a tire spike when he's leaving out of his driveway in the morning. But Damien cannot come back.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#578 - Ben Affleck
but yeah it is interesting and it is kind of a sickness I think a lot of people see that stuff as a sickness these days but I do think it's fascinating about the suspension of disbelief and that that was something that used to be amazing about celebrities is like you never got to see them right and so you only got to see them and actors and you only got to see them on screen and in this way and so you really envision them that way I mean you would almost be shocked if you saw a celebrity in person or an actor in person who didn't like Indiana Jones if he didn't have his hat and whip
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#578 - Ben Affleck
I love that. And that's I think that is a real directorial way to think. I think I mean, I can see that in your brain. I mean, I'm just a judge. I'm just a guy judging you. They just met in a room somewhere. But yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#578 - Ben Affleck
You may have seen the first one. I had a great time getting to know him. Today's guest is Mr. Ben Affleck. Shut up!
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#578 - Ben Affleck
But I never thought about that, that that's how it is, that, yeah, you don't want – you want them kind of – you want to – Hollywood has almost bitten its own tail in that way because there's this underlying like valueless current really that's kind of like a very cheap currency.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#578 - Ben Affleck
And it is eating its – it does eat its tail. In a way. Because the acting and the creation, it's like looking at the beauty of a lake, right? It's like this is picturesque and this is like – how they meant the waves to look.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#578 - Ben Affleck
And there's a current here and there's an inflow and outflow and something landed in the water over here and left a ripple and something else is, this is the B story and there's a ripple, but then it's this under, it's this, all this stuff under it. And it's almost starting to like kind of drain its own lake in a way.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E564 Tom Green
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E564 Tom Green
And is that something that you and your fiancé have kind of – something you've really – is that something you guys have found you like doing together? I mean because to go camping, a lot of people would end up getting separated usually I feel like.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E564 Tom Green
Was it scary to get engaged? Because you've been married before.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E564 Tom Green
And then- It was a long time ago, too, yeah. And you hadn't been married since, though?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E564 Tom Green
This had to be done. That feels like the hard decision. Yeah, I think that's the thing like, yeah, I would like to get married, you know, and I'm just thinking like, man, that day when you're like, all right, I guess I'm going to get married today. That sounds crazy.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E564 Tom Green
He just dropped three new projects on Prime Video, a comedy special, a documentary, and a scripted show. We'll get into all that. We're excited to welcome Canada's son, Mr. Tom Green.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E564 Tom Green
Wow, this is so cool. So that right there that you're on is a lake. It's a pond. It's a pond, yeah. Okay, so that's a pond. There's the dock. So usually it's water. Yeah, yeah. Right now you cut the holes. You're pumping the water out of the pond onto the top of the ice, which is on the top of the pond.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E564 Tom Green
He talked about flooding his backyard. That's cool, yeah. Pretty cool.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E564 Tom Green
It fell out. At the inauguration, he lost a tooth. Yeah, I chipped my tooth, and I walked up to him. I was like, man, I chipped my tooth, and he's like, oh, yeah, and he showed me this, and he freaking lost one. Him and his wife were looking for it on the ground.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E564 Tom Green
No. I think he could have been shocked by something he saw. Maybe that took it out. But yeah, he was just missing a grill piece at the inauguration. It was just pretty bizarre. Man, that's cool. Dude, that's amazing. So these are the types of things you're spending time doing up there. You really document it really beautifully. And a lot of that doesn't even have a lot of audio with it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E564 Tom Green
It's really just seeing. I've noticed this in some of your videos. It's just kind of seeing what's going on.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E564 Tom Green
Oh yeah, absolutely. Yeah, absolutely. Yeah. Were your parents happy to have you back home? What was that like?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E564 Tom Green
Okay. That's a standard special. That's on, that's on prime as well, right? Yeah. Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E564 Tom Green
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E564 Tom Green
Tom Green, it's your first day back in L.A. in four years, did you say?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E564 Tom Green
You guys know that I've been out on crypto over the years, in and out. And one of the things that's brought me back in has been MoonPay. I like the ease of it. Using Moonpay's app is simpler than a one-string guitar, and it's available on iPhone and Android, so you can always have Moonpay in your pocket.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E564 Tom Green
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E564 Tom Green
Head over to MoonPay.com slash Theo, or you can access them in any of your favorite crypto wallets. MoonPay, that's where I'll be. I'm ready to optimize my nutrition this year. That is the truth. and Factor is going to help. Factor has chef-made gourmet meals that make eating, well, easy.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E564 Tom Green
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E564 Tom Green
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E564 Tom Green
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E564 Tom Green
when you look back on it, do you ever, do you ever able to figure out a reason why you liked to record things or like what you got out of like, you know, as, cause as we get older, we, you kind of start to get a little bit of a, like a overview kind of, of ourselves even, you know, in the world, maybe a little bit, a little bit of an idea of what we have been doing in the world.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E564 Tom Green
You ever able to figure any of that out? Kind of like the reasoning behind some of it, like why you liked capturing things or why you liked like pulling the wool over people's, or, you know? Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E564 Tom Green
I don't know if they did or not, but yeah, it looks great. Wow, yeah, it looks so.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E564 Tom Green
You captured so much. You were one of the first people really to just – capture shit and just show it to people kind of, you know, like kind of like not shit, but I mean, just, you know, shit for sure. Yeah. Actually actual shit was involved quite a bit. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. We're going to capture shit and show it to you. What do you mean? Like, this is what we mean.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E564 Tom Green
And I can totally relate to what you said about, um, dude, I used to, when I was, I guess probably turning around 20 to probably 28, um, I would make postcards and I would send them to my kids that weren't even born yet. Like whenever I was traveling somewhere, I would send them, I would make them out to my kids.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E564 Tom Green
I just wanted my kids to know that I'd been, I needed there to be some record that I like cared about my children, even though they weren't here yet, which is kind of a crazy thing, but it made me think about what you're saying. Like, and I would scrapbook, I would save things. Like I just wanted there to be,
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E564 Tom Green
like some proof that i felt something in the world and that i existed right i think i just didn't i don't know if i just didn't have a lot of that like or i needed an insane amount of proof and so that's why i did it but yeah i could just rely i could definitely relate to that to wanting to have some uh timeline yeah that's why you know just in case time ever showed up and said hey were you here i could buy well
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E564 Tom Green
Yeah, yeah. Yes, here I was, you know? I could show you my homework kind of or something, you know?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E564 Tom Green
Was it hard to be true to yourself making your own documentary? And no one should probably make your documentary except for you because you're one of the rare cases it feels like that has so much – has documented themselves so much. And I don't even know if it's – I don't know if it seemed like an egotistical way. I don't think it ever came across like that of your footage.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E564 Tom Green
It just came across that you wanted to have – control over how of yourself you wanted to put yourself out there. Um, but was it hard to make a documentary and not want to like make yourself the hero or something? Or I don't, I've never made a documentary before. Yeah. Yeah. Or was there any of that in it or how do I make this?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E564 Tom Green
Was there a project that you kind of wanted to do over the years that you didn't really nail or you didn't? That something that didn't happen? Was there something? Because you've just done so much stuff.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E564 Tom Green
You did? Was it your first time you'd ever directed a movie?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E564 Tom Green
Oh, yeah, the second – Ebert and Roper. Ebert and Roper. They sent that guy in.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E564 Tom Green
I don't know. This guy looks like he also likes canned sardines at the same time. So, and these days, who would, nobody even trusts the critics anyway. So it's kind of funny now that it's like- Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E564 Tom Green
Yeah, David Spitt and I just wrote a movie together, not to name drop or anything. Nice. We did and we just funded ourselves and stuff. And so it's just kind of a scary time I think. So that's why I'm asking that as well. Not scary. It's exciting too. But it's also like, yeah, I just – One day I'll be like, that's something I tried to do.
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E564 Tom Green
I was trying to be creative, and we tried our best, and I got to try it with somebody who I love to watch anyway. Oh, that's cool. So you've written it. Are you going to go make the movie with him?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E564 Tom Green
Yeah, it's like a – no, it's a good question. It's like two guys. One of them gets hit by a vehicle. My character gets hit by a car when he's young. And Spade rescues me.
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E564 Tom Green
And he and I become friends then and he gets me a job years later. We're working together like at a sewage company.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E564 Tom Green
And it's sort of a seasoned. If I had to direct it too, like I like to like chime in with the director and stuff like that and throw in ideas and stuff like that.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E564 Tom Green
and uh but it's just definitely a big learning curve it's a lot yeah so i can't imagine especially in our budget it's just a couple million bucks so yeah if it were really big that'd be really i feel like it'd be scary kind of yeah i mean back then we were shooting on film oh things cost more um you know it was it was at the time was considered a low budget movie right but uh
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E564 Tom Green
I think we'll just make a trailer and put it out. Yeah. You know, I'm guessing I have no idea. I'm just, I haven't, part of my brain hasn't even gotten to that thought, that thought yet, you know? That's exciting. But it's, it's definitely feels kind of, yeah, it feels like just like, Well, I wanted to, you know, we tried to do it. Who knows what will happen, you know?
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E564 Tom Green
Everybody's going to love that. It's going to be interesting. Yeah. That's what I'll say. That's what I do. Yeah, I do believe that it'll be interesting. Of course it will. How did you deal, whenever there were tough times, like... because you had so much of like recording yourself, like setting, you know, like kind of like living under your own recording schedule and stuff like that.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E564 Tom Green
Full terms go to the Panera Store page on DoorDash. I want to let you know we've restocked all your favorites on the merch site. Everything is in stock. You can show up. TheoVonStore.com. And thank you so much for the support. I have some new tour dates to tell you about. I'll be in Chicago, Illinois on April 24th at the Wintrust Arena.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E564 Tom Green
Were there days off? Like when you would just have your show from home, right? Was there days where you would just like take off? What was that shoot schedule like when you were.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E564 Tom Green
chased him down spark street in ottawa and stopped said you got to come back tomorrow and you know you made him come back because he saw he saw his uh his genius right yeah nobody was like him they just had they were just talking about him uh i just watched the snl monologue that he did one time yeah that was pretty great where he's like they fired me from the show but now they want me back you know yeah which is and how it just didn't even make any make any sense and you just kind of shit on the show yeah um it was weird like because like
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E564 Tom Green
And that lady has the smallest head as well. If people's heads are real small, they should not talk a lot.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E564 Tom Green
I'm outside of Ottawa, but – And a mule is kind of like the El Camino of horses in a way. It's very much the – you know what I'm saying? It's not me saying, hey, I'm going to get a horse. It's like I'm going to get a mule.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E564 Tom Green
That lady has a very small head. When people with small heads talk a lot, it feels like they're – they're cheating the system a little bit. I just feel like a regular head, you get a regular amount of words. Small head, less words, don't do too much.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E564 Tom Green
Yes. Don't be a crazy little head just doing a bunch. Yeah. I dated a girl one time for a while with a small head, beautiful girl, great girl. Mm-hmm. But knew when to talk, when not to talk. You wouldn't see her just yammering on like some big head, you know?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E564 Tom Green
She had big hair, big kind of Italian-ish hair. And every now and then I would feel her head and I was like, oh, I feel like there should be a little more head here. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E564 Tom Green
Hiding it a little bit. Yeah, and you'd see it. Probably a little self-conscious of it. Yeah, could have been. But yeah, cool girl, small head, but knew how to use it, right?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E564 Tom Green
Not somebody that was ambivalent to their head size and is just running around just squawking at the moon every chance they get. Mm-hmm, mm-hmm, mm-hmm. What do a mechanic and an auto shop owner in Georgia, a taco restaurant operator in Arizona, and a life-saving medical innovator in Tennessee have in common? They're all small business owners and they're all thriving on TikTok.
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E564 Tom Green
Across the U.S., over 7.5 million businesses, from family-owned shops to entrepreneurs, are using TikTok to compete and grow. In fact, 74% of businesses on TikTok say TikTok TikTok has allowed them to scale their operations, increasing sales and expanding to new locations. And that growth means jobs. Today, there are over 7.5 million U.S.
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E564 Tom Green
businesses on TikTok, employing more than 28 million people. And that number keeps growing. Small businesses thrive on TikTok. Learn more about TikTok's contribution to the U.S. economy at tiktokeconomicimpact.com. This is pretty wild that Morgan and Morgan has just filed a first of its kind lawsuit against food industry behemoths. That's the truth.
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E564 Tom Green
The lawsuit alleges that these companies engineer their ultra-processed food products to be addictive and market those products towards children, allegedly causing chronic disease in children. The complaint details the strategic and calculated actions that these companies allegedly took to target children.
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E564 Tom Green
with addictive ultra-processed foods, including internal memos, strategic meetings, and the extensive research they allegedly conducted to leverage our biology and neurology to create addictive substances. We've all been hearing for years and maybe speculating that a lot of ultra-processed foods could be addictive. And I just think it's fascinating to finally see this possibility coming to light.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E564 Tom Green
Morgan & Morgan is committed to fighting for the people and for the families. If your child has been diagnosed with one of these diseases, you may have legal options. They've helped thousands of families seek justice against big corporations, and they're ready to fight for you, too. Learn more at ForThePeople.com slash Theo. That's F-O-R, thepeople.com slash T-H-E-O. Did you, yeah, what did I do?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E564 Tom Green
Oh, yeah, I just went to the SNL 50th. Oh, yeah, that's amazing.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E564 Tom Green
Yeah. I'll get to go to the music night and then I'm buddies with Louis C.K. He took me to Chris Rock's birthday party. Oh, nice. On Saturday night, which was crazy because Chris Rock is always like my favorite comedian growing up and –
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E564 Tom Green
So just to even be able to be there, I definitely felt like out of place or whatever, but it was also cool, you know, just to like, you know, kind of fly on the wall there.
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E564 Tom Green
Yeah, a hundred percent. And why, why do you think that is? Just like, it feels like kind of fancy, you know, I mean, I could tell right when I saw Chris Rock, how I felt like some people, you don't get nervous on him or you've seen him a couple of times. And so there becomes a little bit ambiance, you know? But I just didn't know him. And so, yeah, I think that created some of the nervous energy.
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E564 Tom Green
Some other people I did know. So it wasn't that bad. But I got introduced to people that I didn't know. And so you're always like, I don't know. I don't usually say a lot then. I'll kind of just be a listener.
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E564 Tom Green
And I don't know why that is. Why is that? Why is that? Well, I think it's because you're a little bit probably – I don't know how I fit in this circle. There's a lot of circles in the world where I get it.
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E564 Tom Green
Yeah. Yeah. I guess. Yeah. I just didn't know. I hadn't been in that circle before. It's kind of like, I guess when you're in a, I don't know when you're in, just feel like you're in a new water, you're figuring out the temperature. You don't know, you know, you don't want to make a lot of noise at somebody's birthday party. They are seeing friends that they know it's not a huge group of people.
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E564 Tom Green
So you just want to kind of. you know, you don't want to overstay your welcome, you know, kind of type of type of energy, you know, I don't need to tell a big story. Let the, they all, they know each other. I'm just happy to be here. Yeah.
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E564 Tom Green
Happy to be able to see somebody celebrate their birthday to witness people that I admire from a little bit of a way, you know, from a little closer than I'm usually allowed to get to them, you know, online or on TV, I guess. Um, but the SNL thing was, um, We went to the music. They had a music show.
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E564 Tom Green
Yeah. And that's the part that I got to go to, and that was pretty cool. Just seeing different bands. Jelly Roll performed, and so I know him. Nice. And so there was – yeah, and I got to bring a friend, and so I knew – my buddy was – we were just kind of milling around, running into some people that we knew and meeting some new people, but it was pretty chill. Yeah.
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E564 Tom Green
tier of humans there or something you know like there was a first tier and then i was in like this a second tier of humans that were there but that's got to be kind of uh still interesting nonetheless to be there oh it was interesting very interesting because i never you don't even know if like the the the process is real you see it on tv but it's like who knows if that shit's real who knows what's real anymore so to witness that was pretty cool
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E564 Tom Green
Just to be in Washington, D.C. is always pretty neat with all the architecture. But I don't know Trump like that. I'll message with his daughter sometimes, Ivanka. So I'm able to communicate with her. What do you guys talk about? She'll just send me a book that she thinks I would like. Really? We went to dinner one time. She's so smart.
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E564 Tom Green
yeah okay it's mind-blowing yeah yeah yeah um and so go to dinner with her a lot or no i only went one time that's pretty cool was was her husband jared there or was it just you two or he wasn't it was other friends of hers okay yeah i'm not trying to break any news here but it sounds interesting not at all i wish there were news to break dude she's stunning she's awesome
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E564 Tom Green
And then there's like a middleman like who worked with the, I guess, I guess he worked with the Republican Party and he got to invite some people.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E564 Tom Green
So it was just a motley group of strange people that went to the inauguration.
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E564 Tom Green
He said Baron was a fan of the show and I tried to get to see Baron, but I didn't get to meet him.
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E564 Tom Green
UFC I think is – had everything to do with winning the election probably for the Republicans. Yeah. Yeah. Because Dana White is just such a facilitator. He just gets things done. He kept his sport going while all the other sports were shut down. A lot of them were shut down or having to practice really intense methods during COVID. He was able to keep his sport going.
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E564 Tom Green
And so he brought Trump to a lot of his events because they've been friends for a long time. And so I'd met him there a couple of times. And then I knew his brother died of alcoholism. So I was like, well, let me call him and let me ask Dana if Trump would ever talk about his brother. I didn't know about it, you know? And just to see what he's like, like, is he just all a business guy?
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E564 Tom Green
Does he think about other things? Because when you're... You don't get a lot of – you don't hear a lot about his feelings, Trump's feelings. And if you do, he doesn't communicate it in a way where it's very emotional to people, I don't feel like, right? So I was just curious about that. So, yeah, I called up Dana and he said, we'll make it happen.
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E564 Tom Green
So does it – and that's never something that you wanted? That was never like a thing of your whole life like I want to have this thing? It just kind of – Yeah.
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E564 Tom Green
And then two days later he called back and he said, all good. Somebody from his group is going to reach out to you.
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E564 Tom Green
And we went to him up in New Jersey, yeah. Yeah, yeah. And we would have loved to have had Harris and Walls on. We're still trying to get Walls on. We tried to get Harris on even after the election, but they just didn't want to come. Yeah. And so it was kind of a bummer, you know, because I think— Seems like that was a pretty big mistake.
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E564 Tom Green
Yeah, I think it would just let them be more normal. I think people are – if something's too much behind the glass these days, people don't trust the glass. I don't even think that they don't trust the person behind the glass. I think they just don't trust the fucking glass, if that makes any sense. Yeah. No, it does. Yeah, so I guess that was all kind of interesting.
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E564 Tom Green
I'm kind of out of sorts with the way that they're handling like the Gaza-Palestine stuff. Like that shit really I think is insane to me. But that's just –
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E564 Tom Green
Yeah. It's different. You're nice to have, you know, people will be, somebody will walk across the street in Canada and just come tell you they're sorry. And then go back across the street and then nothing even happened.
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E564 Tom Green
There's no, you've never seen them before, you know? Yeah. But Canada's the best. I think Canada gives me hope for humanity a lot of times. It's good people. I love Canada. There's times I've wanted to be Canadian even.
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E564 Tom Green
That was probably 15, 18 years ago, 17 years ago. And it was great, man. I had a great time.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E564 Tom Green
I hadn't started. I had just almost started stand-up. I was traveling. I was left out of there on a school, floating university. I left out of Vancouver called Semester at Sea.
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E564 Tom Green
And it went around the globe and we left out of Vancouver, but I went up to Whistler. I went and caught a ride. Some guy took me hitchhiking up to Whistler. I drove me up there. And, um, the dude, the guy who drove me, he was a caretaker for Superman who had died. Remember Superman who got in the wheelchair?
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E564 Tom Green
Christopher Reeves. He was his caretaker. Okay. Okay. This guy, Michael. And, um, I think I met him. I was at some shop right around there. And he was saying he was in the area or something. He's like, I'm taking the drive up to Whistler. I was like, can I roll with you? He's like, yeah. So he took me up to Whistler, man, brought me back. We stopped along the way, went on some hikes and stuff.
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E564 Tom Green
It was amazing. But I've always enjoyed Canada. I used to have a dream that I would meet a wife in Toronto. Yeah. But I went and did two weeks of comedy up there, didn't meet anyone. Yeah, yeah.
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E564 Tom Green
They're great. Halifax was one of my favorite shows I've ever had in my life. Yeah, yeah. Dude, I even made – my little nephew made up this joke. He said – oh, I told it on stage. I was like, yeah, I heard one time that there wasn't any more fish up here. And so they changed the name to No Fish Scotia. And nobody laughed, right? Yeah, sure. That was fucking fun.
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E564 Tom Green
Sometimes there's something great when they don't laugh. Oh, sure. There's some little thing in there. It's like, oh, that's pretty good. Yeah, absolutely. You know? But yeah, always had a great love for Canada. I think it's bizarre that Trump would say something like that. And it's also like, it just... But what do you expect out of him, you know?
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E564 Tom Green
And what do you expect about the media to spotlight things and make it whatever it is, even if it's a seed of something, to grow it into a million plants, you know?
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E564 Tom Green
I went – who did I meet? I met this kid, Alexander Wang. We just had a podcast episode with him. He created this company called Scale AI. He's like this AI. He's the youngest billionaire ever, this Chinese kid. Oh, my gosh. From New Mexico. Wow. Fascinating dude.
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E564 Tom Green
So I ended up having lunch with him. That was probably the neatest thing that happened that weekend. Did he pick up the tab? I think I paid, actually. You paid? I didn't know he was a billionaire.
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E564 Tom Green
That's why he's a billionaire. He's letting everyone else pick up the tab. I was just happy to be dining with the Chinese, you know? Yeah, that's amazing. Oh, it was great, man. Yeah. And then who else? Something else happened at night. Oh, I saw Wayne Gretzky lost his tooth. And then anything. I saw Joe Rogan for a few minutes. I saw Tony Hinchcliffe from Kill Tony. And then that was kind of it.
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E564 Tom Green
And then I went home. It was too much, like too hard to get around. I saw Lex Friedman. That was pretty neat. I'd never met him. He's a podcaster.
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E564 Tom Green
Oh, nice. Yeah, so it was just, that was kind of, those were some of the neat parts of it. Yeah, yeah. It's amazing. Just getting to see some different folks. Yeah. I think they're having issues even in America. I just saw that there's a part of Oregon that wanted to secede from Oregon.
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E564 Tom Green
Do you think you'll have – now that you're kind of feeling settled out there, do you think – do you start thinking about starting a family or no?
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E564 Tom Green
For a while, did you think that that wasn't going to be a part of your life?
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E564 Tom Green
Yeah, I think that's how I think about it because I think when you're younger, like you have this feeling of like this young love energy type of thing and that starts to –
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E564 Tom Green
It feels that feels less possible the older we get kind of, you know, it just starts to dissipate or it's like, oh, well, I just I'm too wise now or I've had too much experience now that I'm never going to have that sort of like whimsical feeling of like, you know, that a 17 year old or a 23 year old would have, you know.
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E564 Tom Green
But it's nice to know that that can kind of sneak up and surprise you, you know.
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E564 Tom Green
Yeah, that's interesting. I can totally relate with that and what you're saying about L.A. L.A. just feels like this kind of – it's almost like L.A. doesn't have a memory in it. It feels like – I don't know. Other places I think especially if it's a place that's a little more grounded, it feels maybe more meaningful for some reason. I don't know.
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E564 Tom Green
Well, no. It does make me think that I think there's this feeling in LA that if you meet somebody, you're going to have to eventually get them to leave here, right?
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E564 Tom Green
I've always felt that thing like, well, if I met somebody, would they ever leave here with me? Because I'm not going to stay here forever. Right.
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E564 Tom Green
So that I think is a, yeah, I think that's totally common.
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E564 Tom Green
I live in Tennessee. I moved during the pandemic too. In Nashville? Yeah. Oh, cool. I moved during the pandemic. What was true? Whenever Trump was talking about Canada, what was, can you bring it up, Nick? I just want to know what he even was saying. Like, what were they threatening? They were threatening the tariff. Canadian goods, just so our listeners can know what exactly was even going on.
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E564 Tom Green
Tariffs are a central part of Trump's economic plans. He promised to introduce import duties against some of America's main trade partners during his election campaign. He said tariffs will boost US manufacturing and protect jobs as well as raising tax revenue and growing the economy. Fentanyl is linked to tens of thousands of overdose deaths.
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E564 Tom Green
Taking bold action to hold Mexico, Canada, and China accountable to their promise of halting illegal immigration and stopping poisonous fentanyl and other drugs from flowing in our country. It just seems kind of vague. Yeah, I think it's sort of like... But like, what would you do? Like, I'm trying to see, say if you bring a bunch of stuff into my country, right?
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E564 Tom Green
Say if you and I live in different countries and you bring a bunch of stuff into my country, I bring a bunch of stuff in your country. And then you say, okay, I'm going to tax that more. I'm going to charge you more to bring that in. if you don't help stop the fentanyl that's coming in. I just – I don't know. How would you then do that?
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E564 Tom Green
What would you then – on your side, would you say, okay, we'll put more, what, drug dogs and security along the border?
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E564 Tom Green
That's what I would think. I wonder if maybe you guys got grandfathered into some late-night Trump rhetoric there. Who knows?
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E564 Tom Green
That's one thing I don't like about the NBA anymore. All the players, it just seems like they all know each other. Nobody's really playing for their squad sometimes.
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E564 Tom Green
What else did I see in the news that I just saw was happening? Oh, yeah. It was that contraception begins at erection now. So there's a law that they're pushing. Ohio Democratic lawmakers propose conception begins at erection.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E564 Tom Green
Yeah, they're trying to put it on the men a little bit more. So what exactly are they going to do about this now? Well, a new bill in Ohio would make it a crime for men to ejaculate without intending to have a baby.
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E564 Tom Green
And they put a monitor like wraps around your wiener and it just like, it just goes off if it gets too hard.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E564 Tom Green
Yep. Let's zoom in on... I'm going to read it a little bit. Okay.
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E564 Tom Green
No, this is one of those good radishes that they have out there.
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E564 Tom Green
If you're going to penalize someone for an unwanted pregnancy, why not penalize the person who is also responsible for the pregnancy? Now, I can't say I don't agree with this. It's like... Then you're going to have a lot more people. $10,000 per discharge. But here's the thing. Some dudes are just running around, skeeting or whatever they call it.
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E564 Tom Green
I don't know what they call it in different countries, but they're not going to have an extra 10K on them. The court system would be filled with every – Every kid in the world, every 14-year-old kid.
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E564 Tom Green
Look, I'm going to say you don't get pregnant on your own. Representative Anita Somani, Democrat, Dublin said –
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E564 Tom Green
communism is it absolutely yeah absolutely she introduced legislation that would make it a felony to discharge semen without the intent to fertilize so money and state representative tristan raider uh joined forces to propose a bill nicknamed conception begins the direction there are some exceptions such as when protection or contraceptions are used during sex it also wouldn't apply when an individual is masturbating oh okay donating sperm or that's a relief yeah
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E564 Tom Green
Or if the intercourse has taken place between members of the LGBT plus community and this doesn't produce over. So gay people would be able to just jerk off on each other and they don't suffer any of the consequences. But if us straights, if a couple of straights get caught. You know, discharging. This is unfair on so many levels. Well, it's just it's beyond ridiculous what's going on here.
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E564 Tom Green
Republican activist Austin Beigel laughed. It's a mockery of the most basic biological conceptions.
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E564 Tom Green
Well, I think their purpose in this was saying if you think it's absurd to regulate men, you should think it's equally absurd to regulate women. So Mani responded. I'm guessing that there was an original idea that— I see, I see.
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E564 Tom Green
So, huh. I don't know, man. It's a good idea. I'd run up a tab. I know that.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E564 Tom Green
Did you – when you hosted SNL, what was that like for? Do you recall kind of some of the energy of that night?
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E564 Tom Green
Fort Wayne, Indiana on April 26th at the Allen County War Memorial Coliseum. And Miami, Florida on May 10th at the Kaseya Center. We also have tickets remaining in East Lansing, Victoria, B.C. and the Canada College Station. Belton, Texas, Oxford, Mississippi, Tuscaloosa, Alabama, Nashville, Tennessee, Winnipeg in the Canada and Calgary in the Canada. All tickets at TheoVaughn.com slash T-O-U-R.
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E564 Tom Green
Like this is part of the team. It's not just Tom Brady.
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E564 Tom Green
Oh, yeah. My sister's like that. If you touch her lunch, you know, she fucking gets a little animated. If you grab any of her takis out of her little dish.
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E564 Tom Green
It was cool. It's par for the course a little. Cause yeah, I mean, even Adam Sandler the other night was singing. He had a musical tribute that he did to the 50 years. And, um, He referenced a couple of times about people having sketches that they wrote that didn't get on the show. So I think that seems like it was just a weekly occurrence.
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E564 Tom Green
And of course you want to go in there with a little bit more comfort zone for yourself. You know, it's like, yeah, if we can write a couple of them or we can have some manipulation over them, it's probably going to make you feel more comfortable, you know?
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E564 Tom Green
That's the West Hollywood Aquarium right there, brother. I'll tell you that, huh?
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E564 Tom Green
I'm from Louisiana. I live in Tennessee now. Louisiana. But yeah, it gives you – yeah, there's a sense of like – yeah, that you've been out of your soil for a long time, that you've kind of –
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E564 Tom Green
But also it's great that you did though. It's so epic. Yeah. And yeah, I think you're right about, that's like a lot of things in life. You're like, man, I wish I had gotten a trial run or I had a little bit of an idea of how the feelings were or what the energy was like in that space or that room or like, man, there's been things you go out on a stage, part of a show or a,
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E564 Tom Green
some type of thing, and you just play the room totally wrong. That didn't seem like that, but there's definitely times like that in life, and you wish you're like, man, I wish I'd get one more swing at it.
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E564 Tom Green
Oh, yeah, for sure. Was Michael Jackson there whenever you guys played? Who was y'all's musical guest?
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E564 Tom Green
Oh, there's definitely a ton of nostalgia that I love, you know? I think it makes sense that a part of you wants to kind of go back where you came into the world at or be there, you know, to see people that care about me, see people that I care about. I wonder if you've gotten enough of the adventure out of your system in some ways.
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E564 Tom Green
No worries. Yeah, Tom Hanks was there the other night. I didn't get to see him. Oh, I got to see Madonna. She's little. Okay, where was that? Such a little baby carrot. What? She was at that SNL thing.
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E564 Tom Green
I've got to check her out. When you have these, you beat cancer, right? Has it flared back up?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E564 Tom Green
And what are the lymph nodes like? Is that actually in the testicle or is that in the body?
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E564 Tom Green
God, brother. The tariffs they would rack up, they'd make a million bucks a night in that state. That's not a bad idea.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E564 Tom Green
You can still have the adventure, but just have it from there, you know?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E564 Tom Green
And I think also the part like you're saying about this is the first time you'd ever like planted plants. You're like, I'll see these. I've always felt like my life was very transient, like I was just passing by. I've never been the type of guy to get like a lot of furniture or artwork or anything. I'm always just like, I don't know how long I'm going to be here. And it's always in here.
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E564 Tom Green
So a lot of hernias in Canada too. What country has the most hernias you think?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E564 Tom Green
According to available data, countries in South Asia and sub-Saharan Africa tend to have the highest prevalence of hernias, particularly in regions with lower socioeconomic status, with countries like India and parts of Tanzania showing significantly higher rates compared to high-income nations. This is largely due to factors like limited access to health care and higher rates of manual labor. Wow.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E564 Tom Green
Oh, yeah. We used to see them all the time when we were kids. And the Chinese kid on the bike, remember that? That world record book? Yeah. They'd have a 15 or 16, a whole just a starter pack of Asians hanging off a bike.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E564 Tom Green
Was that probably the worst accident you ever endeared?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E564 Tom Green
I'm in my 40s and it's still I still kind of operate like that. But. At a certain point, it's like, yeah, you want something that's a little bit more settling. And if you found a fiance, I'm sure that kind of helped a little bit.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E564 Tom Green
So that was – You just had to lay on the – you just had to lay in bed for a while, huh?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E564 Tom Green
Those are sexy. I'll spend 10 grand on those things, huh? Look out, Ohio. Jeez, yeah, my gosh. Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E564 Tom Green
I'm going to be in Ottawa. I'm not sure, actually. I think sometime before the – I guess May, maybe. Oh, cool, cool. But I'll have to let you know before I'm going to come. Yeah, I will definitely. It'll be so cool to come see the farm. Yeah. Do you think, like, with a lot of the new stuff you're shooting now or some of the stuff that I see on your YouTube channel, it's a little bit more –
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E564 Tom Green
artistic in some way. I don't know if that's a word. Yeah. Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E564 Tom Green
I mean, yeah. Do you notice you like almost, it almost seems like it's almost like you'd want to shoot like a feature, like a movie. I can't tell, you know, I don't know. Cause you know, sometimes we have things that start to happen and then it becomes something else, you know? But when I'm watching it, I feel like I'm,
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E564 Tom Green
Yeah, that's what it feels like. It's like ASMR for your eyes kind of.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E564 Tom Green
I think people are as desperate for that as they've ever been in some ways. I think things have gotten – we're operating at a speed that we don't even feel comfortable in sometimes. Our brains are having to. But yeah, that's what it feels like. It feels like some type of an ASMR or some – it feels calming, man. That's what it feels like.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E564 Tom Green
And yeah, I'm just curious because you're always – you've just always been a creator. You're just always creating. You're always finding some way to – I don't know if it's to incite, to get a reaction out of people.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E564 Tom Green
We're glad you did, man. Tom, thanks so much for all the entertainment over the years. Yeah, man. I just appreciate you spending time with me. Congratulations on the new engagement.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E564 Tom Green
Yeah, I'm going to come pet that donkey, man, when I get up there.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E564 Tom Green
yeah, you'll meet a lot of women. You're like, I never have a period when I'm in Sedona or whatever. And you're like, well, that's... What are we talking? You know what I'm saying?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E564 Tom Green
Today's guest is a comedian. He's an actor. He's a filmmaker. He's an innovator. He's a visual entrepreneur. who really laid the blueprint for podcasting and prank shows in all types of genres. He's had one of the most unique and legendary careers in comedy, from the Tom Green show on MTV to as many movies like Freddy Got Fingered, Road Trip.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E564 Tom Green
A lot of women are keeping crystals in the wrong places probably, you know, but yeah, you meet a lot of wow of people who are into that sort of thing. But I think that's probably like, I mean the natives, it always feels to me like the natives were probably so in touch, more in touch with the earth and locked in on like the feeling of like the best places to be.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E564 Tom Green
That's why they love to be in and like the Dakotas and in the black Hills and stuff like that. Um, and so to be able to go to one of those ruins, I bet, I bet there's still a lot of like, uh, Just a lot of prehistoric or like native connection that's just looking for souls to pass through. Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
You know life's better with a good hack, like learning the secret menu at your favorite restaurant or stumbling upon a buy one get one sale at the mall. Well, there's a wireless hack too, and it's called Visible. Visible's like ordering from the secret menu in wireless. You get unlimited data and hotspot. And plans start at just $25 a month for one line. Taxes and fees included.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
You know, it was, I didn't really ever want to really get into that, you know, because we had naturally good bodies. But my brother Kerry was a bodybuilder. You know, he'd peel the skin off the chicken and eat the rice with no soy sauce on it. I'd never do that, man. I mean, I ate Twinkies, chocolate milk, five or six glasses a day, really. I love talking about sugar. My favorite food is sugar.
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#576 - Kevin Von Erich
I mean, if it tastes good, then my body must want it. Yeah, because when I was growing up, yeah, he's so fit, huh? Yeah. He was probably the most romantically fit of you guys, huh?
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#576 - Kevin Von Erich
He was, man. Just since he was a little kid. He was the... Girls all loved him. The teachers loved him.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
I mean, you know, those are the times kind of. But, yeah, Barry, he was super fit.
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#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Did – I see that picture. I remember he was a little boy. He was so cute. But he said, we went in the barn one day. There's a big old wasp nest up there, a red wasp. You know how they stuck the ceiling up there. And so, you know, they're in the barn. We're all alone. And so – So we, you know, those things that you should, gift wraps, the long tubes that come in the Christmas present.
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#576 - Kevin Von Erich
So we lit one up and said, Kerry, hold it under those red ants, but remember to hold your breath because they can't sting you if you're holding your breath, you know. So don't breathe. And so we light it up and we're watching them go in there, you know, and... They drop all on him, and he runs out crying. We said, stupid, we told you not to breathe.
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#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Yeah, because you were always the barefoot guy. You were a barefoot guy, huh?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
And he said, it's hard to hold your breath when you're crying.
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#576 - Kevin Von Erich
that is a great it is hard to hold your breath when you're crying yeah yeah he was right my favorite when we were kids we used to pick on each other at dinner so bad and the best part was to get somebody to cry when they had a mouthful of food right because they couldn't swallow because they were crying so hard so the food just got it'd be like it just got stuck in the mouth you know just that shit was so funny
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#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Yeah, it sure was. I always, you know, I've got these really big toes, you know, and once you stub your toe on the mat a few times, it gets bigger. And so at first, I just took my boots off because it felt comfortable in the ring, you know, just to move around better. I felt like I could fly. But with the boots, you know, they fill with sweat. You know, your socks absorb the sweat and all.
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#576 - Kevin Von Erich
having siblings was so much fun huh did you guys do like halloween and stuff together any like did y'all do that yeah yeah you mean go out and throw eggs at people and stuff and yeah and we did all that yeah and uh um and what was like birthday parties and stuff like at your house because with so many kids would you guys combine some of them or you did everybody got we had a lot of boys you know a lot of us in our house and i remember
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#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Like ladies say, oh, it smells like boy in here. You know, because they smell like boys, I guess. But I do remember that it was really hard for mama to get babysitters because, like, we were really hard on them, you know, just playing with them and stuff. You know, we'd kind of make a joke out of it, and they'd be crying, and they're never going to watch these kids again.
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#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Oh, you need Abdullah the Butcher to be your babysitter, I feel like. Probably so. You need somebody big. At that time in wrestling, were steroids like a popular thing? Like I remember when I was in high school, people would use like test 200. But even growing up like in Texas, did people even know that steroids were bad for you?
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#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Or was it just like a medicine that was like kind of common in wrestling, do you feel like?
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#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Well, doctors would give it to you. I mean, I had trouble gaining weight when I was like—well, my whole life I've had trouble gaining weight. And so I took Dianabol when I was in high school, but I took one a day for like— two weeks and then lay off for two weeks and then take it again for two weeks and lay off for two weeks. And that was what kind of, that was a little boy pill.
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#576 - Kevin Von Erich
That's what that was for little boys that weren't getting puberty. And then back then, like you say, there weren't all these rules and all, steroids weren't necessarily a dirty word. But doctors did give them to people like after surgery and things like that to improve their appetite and things. Yeah. And it makes a difference.
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#576 - Kevin Von Erich
But if you don't lift weights, if you don't really have a strict regimen, then it's just going to give you pimples on your back and make your hair fall out and your breath stink and all that stuff, you know. Yeah.
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#576 - Kevin Von Erich
yeah it's yeah if you're not yeah if you're just shooting steroids and then just watching you know um i dream of genie or shit like that yeah your life's gonna fall apart yeah look look those guys that uh get the uh injections to make their muscles look big can you believe have you seen some of these guys with they don't even work out they go and they get silicone injections for muscles you know i gotta tell you theo um
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#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Muscles are nothing. You know, it's all... You want to know you're... In wrestling, I would lift weights because I wanted to be a better wrestler. I want my kick out. I want to push my man off. I want to be able to bench, you know, a lot because it's important. But, I mean, it's... To look pretty in the mirror, I mean, that's just a few shades short of fruity, if you ask me. Oh, yeah.
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#576 - Kevin Von Erich
I mean, look at this guy. That's the stuff. That's what I'm talking about. What in the hell is that?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
The guy looks like he's stealing from Target. that's really what is that guy doing what is that guy doing yeah that guy looks like a little um and i'm gonna take that joke out that was that's offensive i just wanted to make you guys laugh Um, which, uh, yeah, we used to use them.
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#576 - Kevin Von Erich
I'm trying to think we, and we used to me, I just like, we got in and we were weightlifting pretty heavy and it was fun using them cause it definitely made things easier. You know, that was fun. And you, I felt, you felt way more. invigorated, you know, for sure. What kind, what kind did you do? We were doing like test 200 and then people would, some people would do Deanna ball. I never got that.
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#576 - Kevin Von Erich
We just would go on spring break and get test 200 or some people worked on farms and we get test 200 from them, you know, testosterone or something. Yeah.
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#576 - Kevin Von Erich
They get heavy. I had some knee surgeries, too, you know, but... But I'll tell you, I go barefoot all I can.
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#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Well, some of that stuff, I mean, I have to say that, uh, some of that stuff, the guys, the guys use, you could see, uh, veterinary use only on the box, you know what I mean? Equine this and all.
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#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Oh, some of you'd open up and it'd be like, Yeah. Yeah. We took the top off. You're like, shit, that ain't for us.
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#576 - Kevin Von Erich
That's what it was. It really. Yeah, I was never into that because you really can kill yourself with it. You know, it's like it messes your whole body up, you know.
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#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Was it popular in the sport when you got into it? I'm just trying to wonder what the times were like and how men felt like they had to. Yo, man. Well, and you guys were... Because your family was in... Your family was in good shape overall. But some of the shapes in wrestling weren't... It wasn't as much about the shape. You know, there was a lot of guys out there that were just... Oh, yeah.
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#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Well... we wanted to put the best show on television we could do and if that meant take steroids too we didn't care i mean priority one was our body yeah i mean was our uh was delivering that punishment you know we move quick and explode if you ever you've seen our wrestling was oh man gary was so it's unbelievable watching him
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#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Well, we just, that's the thing we wanted to, and that was the attitude back then. If the guys we're wrestling are going to do steroids, well, then it's only fair that we do them too. Now, we didn't, don't get me wrong, it's like, it's not like we were really into it. Kerry went down to the University of Houston and was still in the discus for Coach Tellez down there, a U of H. And, uh,
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#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Yeah, I'm sure. I know you moved out to Kauai, was it, or Hawaii?
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#576 - Kevin Von Erich
The stuff he learned down there was all this like expert stuff about weightlifting and weight events and all, you know, they would take a cigarette and puff a cigarette right before they throw. And yeah, it's something in the nicotine would kick the muscles in, you know, kick your body. It would give them just a little edge, just a little more.
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#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Or they drink ice cold water before you have a go max on your bench. It helps just a little bit.
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#576 - Kevin Von Erich
You hear that, Coach Hester? Kurt Hester, he's a speed and strength coach of mine. I think he coaches at the University of Houston now. But I'm going to make sure he hears that. I'm realizing that anywhere worth going is worth going in good boots. Find your perfect pair with Tacovas. That's what I'm wearing. I like these wide toe they got on them, baby.
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#576 - Kevin Von Erich
You know, sometimes, now, I like the wide toe, but sometimes I wear that little pointy toe, that little bird foot, you know? If I'm doing something, if I'm trying to just, you know, dance with a woman or impress a pair of keep, baby. Being confident isn't about being different. It's about being yourself.
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#576 - Kevin Von Erich
I'll bet it is. I'll bet it is. We all go barefoot out there. I say I'm always kind of crazy about that, but I just hate for my toes to touch each other. I've always liked that. I hated shoes when I was a little kid. I guess I got old enough to say no, and I just didn't wear them anymore.
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#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Every one of Takova's boots are handcrafted with over 200 meticulous steps for broken-in comfort right out of the box. Yeah, I started wearing my Takovas just during the evening time, but now they're just growing more and more on me. It's just like, gosh, my feet are just better now. Now I won't wear them when I sleep. I ain't no pervert. You feel me?
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#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Right now, get 10% off at takovas.com slash T-H-E-O when you sign up for email and text. That's 10% off at T-E-C-O-V-A-S dot com slash Theo. Tacovas.com slash Theo. See site for details. Tacovas. Point your toes west. You know, so many of us have dreams. Things we think about and...
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#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Like, oh, I could make this or I could create this and then I could offer it to people, offer a product or an experience or modality to help others. Well, Shopify is amazing. the thing that connects your dream to your audience. I'll say that straight up and that's the truth.
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#576 - Kevin Von Erich
You know, when we started out, we had a website and an interface and then we had a store and at a certain point we needed help. We needed a site and a store that could fluctuate and Shopify offers just that. You might say, well, what if I can't design a website? Shopify's got you from the get-go with beautiful ready-to-go templates to match your brand's style. What if I need a hand?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Get help with everyday tasks like enhancing product images, writing product descriptions, or generating discount codes with Shopify's AI tools created for commerce. Turn those dreams into... And give them the best shot at success with Shopify. Sign up for your $1 per month trial and start selling today at Shopify.com slash Theo. That's Shopify.com slash T-H-E-O. Shopify.com slash Theo.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
So when you guys were, because didn't Kerry almost throw the disc? Didn't he almost go to the Olympics?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
The president canceled the Olympics, right? We didn't go?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
No, it was that thing. I believe there was an airliner flying over Korea and a Russian shot it down. It was over a sensitive area. And I believe it was Jimmy Carter.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
And we didn't do the Olympics that year. Yeah. But he would have competed. Kerry would have competed.
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#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Well, you know, I think he would have, but I'm not really sure because they would have had to have the – I think he went to Champaign for those three games. Yeah, Nationals. But I don't think he went to the other – they even took it that far. I'm not sure. I'm not sure how it went, but –
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Did you ever wear those toe separator things? You know what I'm talking about?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Which one of you guys was kind of the leader of you guys' brothers?
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#576 - Kevin Von Erich
And I know sometimes it goes by age, right, because there's always a – I was the big brother, you know, and no doubt about that. But my brother Dave had a real responsibility streak. He was just – my dad would come to him and say, okay, I want this fence to be – I want it to go down there 200 yards, and I want a good post, or I want it double-fenced, and I want –
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
and i want everything just right and he told dave and so david told me and carrie what to do he's the foreman yeah there's a foreman and so and kind of worked that way in wrestling too and uh he had he was good on the microphone too oh yeah it's important you got to be good on the mic was there a time where all all of you guys were wrestling at the same time Yeah, just briefly, it was.
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#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Those are great. You know, I wear them in the river at home, you know, to walk in the river. But you can walk by a vine and they'll cut your toe, you know, and it can trip you, you know. It's a little hazard for those things. Did you feel like a caveman kind of? Yeah, yeah. The good kind of caveman. I mean, I'm going to drag around a pound by the hair. Yeah, no domestic disputes or anything.
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#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Man, that was so much fun, too, because we never got to go to Japan together. Dave and I went to Japan together. Carrie and I went to Japan. Never together, though. But when we could all three to be together, just for the... When we first started out, you know, for that first year, all three of us could go to towns. We got so much fun, man. We always would stop. We'd scuba dive all the way there.
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#576 - Kevin Von Erich
You know, if there's clear water, if it's just a river or something, we'd dive in and swim. It was just... Oh, along the way? Yeah. We had fun all day. And we wouldn't even go to the dressing room. We'd get dressed out in the woods where the swimming hole was, and we'd get our wrestling stuff on, go right to the show, get in the rain, come back out and do our stuff. We had it down. We had fun.
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#576 - Kevin Von Erich
And you got a leech in your tights, brother. Hey, don't call it that. Did you all train together at home at a certain place? What was that kind of thing?
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#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Yeah, we had a gym outside the house on an adjacent property. And I'm probably the cause of all the pressure because I would put up Vince Lombardi posters all the time for myself. I wanted to be the best I could be, and that was what it was like to live on my own. Back then it was like we lifted weights three times a week, but we ran, we swam.
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#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Everything was about getting better because I wanted to play in the NFL. And Kerry, Well, Kerry just wanted to wrestle, and Dave wanted to wrestle, but I was a football player. And so that's what it was all about. It's just do your best. The quitters never quit. Winners never quit. Quitters never win. You know, that kind of stuff.
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#576 - Kevin Von Erich
I had posters everywhere on the gym, and we'd spot each other and push each other and call each other sissies if we couldn't do it. I mean, we would spit on each other. We were savages, and we wanted to get –
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
good as we could be and when we we wrestled it was hard you know we we we were rough because we anything worth doing is worth doing right yeah we wanted to be like successful moms my dad was but it would meant just go all out you know completely commit and that means every day on wednesdays we run 500 400 meter uh five one lap around the tracks 400 meter We'd run 5400s on Wednesdays.
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#576 - Kevin Von Erich
We'd time them. And Kerry and I were both high jumpers. Kerry high jumped too. And we could bench. Kerry and I figured as long as we could bench twice our weight and high jump over our heads, then we would always be in shape. And, well, yeah, for knee surgeries and all, you can't do that again. That was the theory we wanted to go with. And Dave was the same.
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#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Dave didn't work out in the gym as hard as we did, you know, but Kerry and I did. Everything we did was to exhaustion. And we were kind of nauseated. When you think you're about to throw up, now you've done enough. Dang. We really did, man. It was all the way.
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#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Well, everybody does, man. That's the, if you want to look different, you have to do what everybody else doesn't do, you know what I mean? Fight through that.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
And did, were all your brothers kind of subscribed to that same mentality or did some of them come along just because that with that mentality, just because they were your brothers?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
No. Does that make any sense? Yeah, yeah. I guess, yeah, nobody was just along for the ride.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
I think they were all pretty much just wanting to be like, me, Dave, and Kerry wanted to be like dad, but, you know, things got kind of different when we were kids. When I was a junior in high school, sophomore in high school, my mom and dad were going to get a divorce, you know, and my dad was going to move out. That was my freshman year is what it was.
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#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Yeah, you know, because, like, you feel the ground. You feel the earth. It's just something about it. I didn't know there was anything to it, but Ross tells me, my son Ross tells me that there's an energy in the earth that your feet can pick that up, you know, and I think I've been digging that for a long time without even knowing there was a –
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
And I came into the kitchen one day, my mom and dad are talking, and dad said, Kev, I'm going to move to Dallas and just get an apartment, and y'all are going to stay here, and it's going to be just great. Y'all go to school and come see me on the weekends. I said, are y'all talking about a divorce? And he said, yeah, son, we are.
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#576 - Kevin Von Erich
He's trying to describe it to you without saying we're getting a divorce.
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#576 - Kevin Von Erich
I said, well, I want to go with you, Dad. And Dave heard me, and Kerry came in and said, we do too, Dad. We want to go with you. And so my mom's...
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#576 - Kevin Von Erich
gonna be there alone it looks like you know and i guess they but i was the mediator with that you know and they kind of worked it out but uh with the deaths you know then my mother was kind of damaged inside it made her like um she was suffering so much she you know with dave she was tough i mean her little own little brother and jackie but then with dave she toughed it out you know
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#576 - Kevin Von Erich
But then baby Mike, he was the baby of our family. You know, Chris was even younger, but Mike was the, we'd been traveling around and we weren't home that much. So when Mike was the baby, you know.
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#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Traveling with wrestling? You guys had been traveling with wrestling?
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#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Yeah. See, Dave and, the movie doesn't have the suit, but Dave and Carrie were both married. And Carrie had, Dave had a daughter, died a crib death, but Carrie had two daughters, Holly and Lacey, and a beautiful, sweet daughter. They spend every Christmas with us. And we told you, I got the big house for all to have our Christmases in.
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#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Because family is just like we were saying, there's nothing more important than family to me or to any thinking man. And then again, there's the being wrestlers and our brothers. I mean, my dad's a bad guy, you know, and they're booing him. It kind of makes you feel like it's us against the world, you know. These people are booing my dad. If they hate him, then we hate them too, you know.
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#576 - Kevin Von Erich
What was that about? So they, because... At what point did the audience turn on your father? Or just part of the... No, he was like the perfect bad guy.
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#576 - Kevin Von Erich
He was a Nazi. And after my brother Jackie died, and they're up in New York, he was like, his wrestling changed. He was different. He was wild inside. And I think it was like he wanted to just take it out on people. And it showed in the ring. Theo, when the wrestlers would come out of the dressing room, get in their cars... the fans would stand around and boo, you know, from a distance.
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#576 - Kevin Von Erich
But when my dad came out to get in his car, silence. They were like, Fear. It was like fear. He might run over here.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Oh, it was such an exciting time back then when wrestlers would come into the ring. I mean, there was just, God, I remember being a kid and we would lose our fucking minds and just beat the shit out of our sister. The second the fucking wrestling program came on, we would beat the shit out of our sister. Oh, man. For no fucking reason.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
It was a thing, you know, but now I caveman it all the time out in Kauai. That's the way to live.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
I guess she just couldn't get used to the schedule and no problem to stay away at that time of day or something.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Oh, if it was more than an hour broadcast, she knew she was in for it. I'll tell you that. You hear a lot of stories about how wrestling was like, you know, we had to wrestle one night and then the next night you had to wrestle again. And did you go on road trips like that where it was like a few days at a time? Was it weeks and months? I mean, what was it really like back then?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
and that's there a lot a lot of those were triple shots double shots on on uh on sundays you know we'd rest tv shows or we'd riff we'd do two or three times but after the started to be the deaths you know then i would have to my my dad had it work dave could sell out a building carrie could sell out a bit i could sell out and but mike was not quite there you know and so
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Yeah, I bet. Well, it's called, yeah, right here it says it's grounding. Grounding, also known as earthing, is a wellness practice that involves direct contact with the earth's surface, like walking barefoot on grass or sand to potentially connect with the earth's natural electric charge.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
When Dave died, either Kerry or me had to fill his slot, you know, work in another town. And that was hard. But then Kerry with the foot, now I've got two slots to fill, you know. And so I was wrestling three times a day almost, a couple times a week, but I was wrestling every day.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Was it an option to take some of the slots off the schedule, or did you guys feel like as a family we have to fill this? Did you feel like your dad was like, we have to fill this, or it was just that's what you did?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Well, I got to tell you, after the deaths, we were – we were down, you know, and we sure didn't feel like getting back in that ring, but you know, you have to, because after death, there's all the publicity and dad's saying, you know, it's been a week, it's been two weeks or whatever. But I mean, there were times when we said, dad, I can't do it yet. Can't do it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
You know, but he did want us to get in that ring. It was, but it was a family business. I don't hold it against him. I understand. But, um, It was brutal to make yourself do that. I mean, what's on your mind is love and brotherhood and seeing him again in heaven. But you want to project, I'm going to kick that guy's ass. You know, it's kind of your tour, you know.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
It's like having two feelings at the same time. It's like... especially with death. Cause it's like, somebody's gone, but they're the one that's gone, but you're the one that hurts. And, and you don't even know what they're feeling like. And you almost don't want to like mourn too much because then it's like, are you just using the morning for yourself?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Just like all that kind of stuff has always hit me.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
I know you wake up in the morning and there's nothing else. You can't think about anything else, man. Man. I'm old enough, I can tell you a little something. I never wanted to endorse marijuana or put it over because, you know, I had a position, you know. When I would wake up in the morning, I could not think of anything else. That's all I thought about. And if I smoked a joint, I could daydream.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
I think it makes sense because even if you look at a tree or a plant, you don't see them wearing shoes or nothing. Like, that would be crazy. If you saw a plant, Like wearing shoes, you'd be like, oh, that guy, that plant's out of his mind. Like plants, you know what I'm saying? They're connected to the earth. So I think that makes good sense.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
I could think of something else, you know. And I was grateful for that stuff.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
I mean, it helped me. Well, I'm sure, especially out in Kauai, it was probably... Oh, shoot, yeah. I was helping everybody.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Well, so I had my knee replaced, you know, and it didn't go very well. It's kind of—I rehabbed it too quick. See, in college, when you have a knee surgery, you fight like hell to get it back, you know. And, well, I got out there, and I got a knee replacement, but I'm a senior citizen. So instead, I shouldn't have rehabbed it like that, you know. I like—
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
I was doing flips off the cliff with the boys and it knocked something. I smelled glue on my breath. I thought, oh, that can't be good. Because they just glue in there.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Really? Yeah. And you think some of it came up your bloodstream and you could taste it a little bit? I tasted it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Yeah, I tasted it. That's bad. Anyway, so. Damn, they're using damn glue? Well. Yeah, they do. They use glue. Well, shit, we could use glue. I mean, they're power tools. Really, I mean, working on you, they got to drill the whole deal. You know, they hide it from you.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Yeah, with that anesthesia, dude. They just bring in a couple of Cub Scouts in there, and they're doing damn woodwork on you in there. Playing. Playing. With wrestling, did you have to be as tough at the wrestling part as you did at the partying part?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
There seemed to be this thing, when I look back on wrestling and a lot of the stories, especially coming up out of the 70s, 80s, 90s, where not only did you have to prove yourself in the ring that you were the toughest guy, that you were able to do the matches, but then you had to prove yourself again at the drinking table. Was that part of the culture as much as...
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Oh, man, that was the easy part for us because none of us really liked the taste of booze, you know. I mean, I'll have a drink or even two, but I'm done. I can't drink six of anything, you know. I mean, a lot of people can, but I think that was a big thing for us. We never did get that. Big stomach, I guess. A lot of my friends, you know, love that beer.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
All my teammates, you know, my wrestling colleagues love beer, but I never did get into it, and I'm glad I didn't because it's taken its toll on a lot of good men.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Probably kept you pretty locked in. Your family lives, you live on your family's ranch, right? Or you live on a ranch here?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
But I'll tell you this. After those knee surgeries, I had to take three Oxycontin a day. Yeah. Shoot. One in the morning, one at noon, or one at 1 o'clock, and then one at sundown. Because they had time release in them, you know, and it worked great. It didn't make you goofy or anything, but I could ride a bike, you know, and stuff.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
It kind of hurt worse later, but with the pain pill, take another dang pill.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Well, then COVID came and I went to get my medicine because we never left our ranch except for go to the doctor, you know. I mean, we had everything there. In Kauai? Yeah, in Kauai. I grow four different types of avocado and... And we trade them with our neighbors. We have turkey. We raise sheep. We have tilapia, a fish full of thousands of fish.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
And every kind of fruit you could think of, you know, we had a reason to go. The boys are sparing fish and throwing the net and catching crabs. And so it was a great way to live, you know. So we just didn't really leave. But COVID came, and so I go to get my medicine, and it's like twice as much. I was already paying $900 a month for it. It's $1,800. And I said, well, I'm quitting this stuff.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
We bought a ranch. We sold it. I lived on my family ranch in Texas. We sold it about 20 years ago and moved out to Kauai and built a big place, you know. But I wanted to give my wife that kind of house, you know. So everything that was in the house was something that I really liked about room service or some hotel overseas, you know. I had a bathtub.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
And so... I quit, but man, I got these flu symptoms like, you know, I felt like I was weird. But I fought through it, you know, but Ross got me this stuff called Kratom. It's a leaf on my tree. We grow the tree out there.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
you can crumble it up or it becomes that you put it in a powder put it in a pill and i was able to kick that uh oxycontin in 10 days i wouldn't even want another one by using kratom kratom did that yeah and then were you able to get off the kratom that was easy to quit kratom i never liked that stuff smells like hay anyway you know but it was easy to get off of it but uh
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
So, you know, I decided, I told you when we came on, I wanted my life to kind of be, help someone. All that suffering, you want to look at something good. Yeah. You know, and if anyone is suffering from any kind of addiction, like the opioids and all, bear that in mind. They're creating places all around. I'm not saying I'm not getting any money for it. I'm just saying... It sure helped me.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
And if you're an addict and it was bothering you, I mean, I couldn't believe I was addicted to this stuff. I mean, I wanted to quit, and I got sick. I thought, shit, never going to let something happen like this to me again.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
How bad did feeling like you had to take OxyCons get?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Well, I never kind of let it get to that point. You're supposed to take it at 1 o'clock. You're supposed to take it in the morning, at night, before you go to bed. And so that's what I always did. And you don't walk around high. You just don't hurt, you know, because it's got the pain relief, the time release in it, you know.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
But that kratom was helpful, huh? Oh, yeah. Wow. Sure was. Yeah, I have a friend who got addicted to kratom. So I think there can be a slope there, but I certainly could see how it could be used to help people get off of OxyContin.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Kratom is? Kratom is. It must be addictive, yeah. Was addiction ever part of any of your brother's issues or no? Did addiction run in you guys' family? It runs in my family.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Well, you know, I don't think it does. My brother, Kerry, you know, was... He went to the Betty Ford Clinic and all these places, but he was never addicted to anything. He just liked all of it. I mean, he'd do cocaine one day. He'd do pain pills the next day. He'd do acids. I mean, mushrooms. It was something different all the time. And I'm not saying I'm so good.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
No, but it sounds like he was addicted. He was addicted to the feeling.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Ah, to the feeling. I see what you're saying. Just getting out of his skin, you know? Oh, yeah. Yeah. God, that's a steel cage match. I don't want to be in my own skin.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Yeah, I know, man. But, you know, that's life. You've got to fight through that crap, man. You've got to fight through it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Well, yeah, because to me it sounds like he might have had, he could have had addiction problems. Like if they had looked at it by today's standards. You know, I think things were definitely looked at differently then.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
yeah yeah might as well because if you can't stop then what do you call it you know yeah because he i know he wanted to stop because it was because he had those beautiful daughters he loved them so much you know holly and what was the other one holly and lacy lacy lacy lives out in l.a and holly is out there in east texas now and uh hopefully they'll be with me soon because
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
You know, I've been going back to Hawaii every few months, every month, you know. But I haven't been back in a couple of months now. And, man, it is hurting me because Benji, my little treasure, is out there. Jill has four. She has a boy and three daughters. And who's Benji? Benji is the six-year-old. And we're like this. We grow everything together. Oh, that's a grandchild? Yeah, yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
You could do a cannonball in it, you know, splash it all over the wall. It had a drain. It was just every room had something like that. But it was... It's real expensive in Kauai, and I have a lot of kids, you know, and so they all go off to their house, and no one wants to live in the big house.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Oh, got it. No, I've got a lot of grandchildren.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Yeah, yeah, I sure can. Fire him up. And then Kristen has given me plenty. But that boy and I being five, four, three that age, he was just with me all the time. Oh, it's fun. And now Marshall has given me a grandson, and he's just about to turn five. And we're like that. I mean, it's either monster trucks or we're turning over rocks.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
We're just throwing rocks and catching snakes and bugs and lizards and all, and it's just – It's just fun all the time, you know, but it's like.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Yeah, I could see that for sure. You remind me also, I mean, if you were my grandfather or something, that would be awesome. And you remind me of Tommy Lee, actually, about probably like, does anybody ever tell you that? Who's Tommy Lee? Tommy Lee from Motley Crue.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Oh, that band came to Sportatorium. They're a bunch of nice guys. I know those guys. Of course you do, dude.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
That's you, dude. That's why you know him. But Tommy's a great guy. Tommy's great. The way you guys talk and stuff, does that make any sense to you, Nick? Tommy's the greatest dude, man. He's nice. Just the way you guys sound and stuff like that, he's a super guy. Yeah, they're good, man. Did you ever fight somebody high? Could people fight high in the ring? Did people ever fight high in the ring?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
I don't think so. I mean, not on purpose. Right. You know, but I can remember, though. Oh, golly. Yeah. Oh, we did before. Yeah. there was this stuff called GHB, and it's this super drug, but they sold it in like athletic stores, you know, and sporting goods stores, because it was like a fat burner.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
And so we're going to this town, and Kerry's going there, he told us not to take too much of it, but by the time, he said, you'll probably go to sleep in the car, by the time we get there, you know, your body's gonna be burning your fat off, you know? So we took that crab and golly shoot. I don't know how we got through that night. It was terrible. Are we just zombies? Yeah. Yeah, we were.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
We were like, we're just sitting there dozing off. It's match time and it'd be just one of the brothers trying to wake you up, you know, shut up, you know, and it was terrible, terrible. That stuff was something.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Yeah. I could just imagine what that's like at that time. You're almost like anything to kind of get an edge. Everybody's testing out the cool stuff. I know where the new thing is. I guess that's all, that's always been a part of that bodybuilding world too.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
I think, you know, when you're big in a bodybuilding, a lot of those things kind of come along, like, you know, there's different creatines, there's different, um, uppers, there's like these, uh, testosterone revigorators or whatever. And it's just a picture of like a
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
comes up sometimes it comes in like a huge set of balls the thing the powder or whatever like what the hell is this but yeah there's all types of um that that bodybuilding's always been on the edge of the of like so competitive yeah using us and finding an uh uh an advantage yeah you know that's when two guys are gonna look at looking at the mirror with each other in there
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
And so we happened to trade that to a guy that just happened to have 27 acres, a waterfall on the land, a big nice spring, and five houses, you know, for my sons. And so we traded that house for that 27 acres, and that's where we are. No way, just an even trade? Even trade, yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
At a certain point, I think so. It's interesting that you refer to other wrestlers as like a team or you refer to it as your team or something. Is that how you guys thought of y'all's wrestling organization as a team?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Yeah, it was a family business, and it was like a team. It was like, you know, we never were jealous of each other, you know, as the real truth to it is, you know. When my dad and I flipped, when Carrie and me flipped the coin for the world title, well, the truth to it was that I had a family, and I'm married, and I have children, you know, and Kerry wanted to be the world champion.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
But to be the world champion, it's a special kind of wrestler to do that, and not a Kerry. You need somebody that makes the other guy look good. That's really what it's all about. And Dave could have done that, but... And I think Kerry Mayer, I couldn't have done it, though. I've been a babyface my whole life, you know. I kiss the babies and I, you know, do all that stuff.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
But the real difficult work in wrestling, the hard stuff, is to be a heel. That's the creative stuff, you know. And for our listeners that don't know what a heel is. Well, a heel's the heavy, the bad guy, you know. The Bruiser Brodies and the Kamalas and the King Kong Bundys, you know.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Well, because you're limited. For a good guy, what you can do, you know? But a bad guy, he can do anything, and he better do it, too, because it's all about, you know, it's like you're slaying a dragon, you know? There's the knight in shining armor, and there's the big, ugly dragon. You know, when I first went out to Atlanta on WTBS out there, I was...
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
And I found out, talking to him, he was 16. Oh, my. He was a teenager all that time.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
What the hell? He was. Y'all are being damn sex trafficked, you know. That's crazy, dude. Yeah. That's hilarious. You're both scared of each other. You both haven't even finished schoolwork.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
I'm sorry to interrupt you, Kevin. Bring that picture of him up. Look at that fella, dude. Yeah. That's wild, huh?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
He was something else. You would have loved him. yeah i'm telling you michael hayes is uh he's a character buddy calvert but that guy was 100 gold inside oh he would fight to the death but he had a heart for little kids and for girls and he was just nice he was such a good guy man but he was a battleship too what um did he pass away yeah yeah what happened to him oh shoot he was uh
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
dang you don't see a lot of that anymore no no i'm glad the guy i couldn't believe he did it really did you have one of those open back uh verandas or something it's called maybe in hawaii what's that back patio you know what i'm talking about those porches it's just so perfect yeah they call it a lanai oh god oh man at my daughter's house there when we stay with her she's got a bed set up for me on out there and so i sleep in the wind you know it's great
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
He overdid it on the plane. He OD'd on a plane, and they had to restart him. Shoot. And then something, I believe that his blood stayed away from his brain too long, and it starved his brain. He had some damage. When he came out of that, then I talked to him, and he just, Kev, I hurt myself, brother. I said, no, Terry, you're fine. He goes, no, I'm not fine, Kev.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
But then I'd always heard that he fell off the jetway getting on a plane one time, too. I think he did. He fell off the jetway drunk. Landed on his head and got back up and got on the plane and made the show. Yeah. So I thought that was why he was like that. But he said, no, something else.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
You know, yeah. So many guys went through so much, man. Terry Funk, he's still alive, I believe, isn't he?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Man, I hope so. But I hadn't heard the bad news if he had. I know he says he passed away in August. I love that guy. Two years ago. So I hope that I...
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Terry Funk was, man, he was incredible to watch, wasn't he?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
He sure was. He taught me so much, too. Me, my brother Dave and I, we're 19, 18 years old, and we're the bad guys. And Amarillo wrestling Dory and Terry, who are the great good guys. They loved them. And Dory Funk as well? And Dory, they're brothers. And their dad was Dory Funk Sr. Okay. A super badass. Well, these two were in the ring, and Dave and I, we're just learning.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
You know, we're just learning about this. Dave, pretty good heel, but I didn't know what to do, really. And so we're in the ring, and Dory's telling us everything. He goes, spit on me, kid. I said, sir? He said, spit on me. So I spit on him. So Dave unloads on Terry, too. Yeah. The crowd went wild. They hated our guts.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
So they beat us, you know, and I get on the mic and I say, you're in trouble now. I'm going to get my daddy. And so then they booed me good, you know. And so I love being a heel, but I just wasn't good at it like, you know, like Dave was.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Irving Curry. So that was the real, so that was something that was tough to be a heel. Yeah, it's a lot harder.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
You have to have some creativity about it, you know? Yeah. And then you've got to have a personality that you're projecting. It's got to come from in here, you know?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Right. And you can't get upset if people don't like you because you're almost the guy that people don't like.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Well, Dave and I come back from the ring in Florida one time, and Dave's a bad guy, and so I'm a heel, too. And so this guy steps up. You remember people would dip skull, and they'd spit in those cups? So we sloshed that stuff on us, you know. And I thought, well, you know, we've been begging him to hate our guts. Finally, we're there.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
And I look, and Dave's running up in the bleachers after the guy. Yeah. So I said, Dave, we worked our butts off to make him hate us. He goes, Dave was just, you know, you couldn't talk to him. He was so mad.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Yeah, dude. You're like that Legend of Zelda character. What's that little guy's name? Yeah, you're like Link from Zelda. That guy's always in the wind, man. That guy's a real nature dog. Zelda? It's a character from a video game. So the ranch you have now, all your family can all live there? Yeah. Oh, that's awesome.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
That's BetterHelp.com slash Theo. Kerry, do you think he was the most athletic?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Yeah, Kerry was a really good athlete. He was? He was just everything. It just came easy to him. In fact, when I watched him play his senior year in high school, it looked like a... Played football? It looked like Terry Gordy playing against a bunch of peewee guys. You know, he was that big. And I sound like I'm exaggerating, but he carried the ball five times and he scored five touchdowns.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Yeah, that is, man. I'm telling you, Theo, that's like... That's so important to me. You know, I had a lot of brothers. And, man, I loved them so much. We were really close, super close.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
And the coach took him off offense, said he wanted to save him for defense, but he was great on offense. He was a good linebacker too, but... But he was really a good running back. I've never seen anybody just run through people like that.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
But he didn't like football. University of Texas offered him a scholarship. He didn't want to go. He didn't want to play football. He wanted to do track. No, he wanted to do track. He wanted to do track. And Dave, the same way basketball. Dave loved basketball. I love football, you know. But we go to North Texas, and Dave has a scholarship. We're both there, you know.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
And so I look up on that hill one day, and it's a real hot day, and I hear a pop. And I saw he hits the ground. So I look up there, and I can see through the dust. Dave's big old frame getting up off of that ground. He's playing wide receiver, and we had some defensive backs that were killers, you know.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
And so Dave gets up, and I see the coach is parked over there watching practice, and he walks out to Dave, and he tells Dave, we're practicing in that air-conditioned gym out there, and when we get thirsty, we get a drink of water. It's not like this out here. So Dave quit and went to play basketball at North Texas, and I played football. But we all each are sports. Dave was a basketball player.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
I played football, and Kerry was discus, you know.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
And your other brothers, Mike and Chris, were you guys a little bit disconnected from them because of age?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Yeah, that was it. Because by then we were wrestling and we weren't home very much. And Mike was the big brother to Chris. Got it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
For sure. Well, I mean, I only knew so much, but, you know, I just saw you guys in the ring and stuff like that. And, you know, there's been a lot of documentaries and smaller documentaries. There's been the Claw movie. So there's been a lot of, you know, references to you guys for sure. Yeah. Your father was from Texas, and he was a wrestler.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
So that was almost like a second installment of children in a way. Yeah, it was. Yeah, I saw that match with Kerry and Ric Flair. There's one match I remember. It was during the daytime, right? Yeah. And I think it was in 84, maybe. Yeah. Is it daytime? It was 84. This was after David had passed away. Right. Um, were you at this match? Oh yeah. I wrestled on this card too.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
And, uh, cause he looks so much more athletic and no judgment to Ric Flair. I mean, their age difference is maybe huge here, but did he ever have to slow down with other wrestlers to make it look more real? Does that make any sense?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Well, I suppose, but yeah, you know, it's all about... He had such charisma, you know, that his charisma was really his thing. I mean, he had a great body and a beautiful build. And I'm going to tell you, Tony Atlas and I were bench pressing. And I had a good bench press. I could bench 445 pounds. But my brother and Tony were benching 520, both of them. And I mean, repping it, you know.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
And I've never seen anybody as strong as Kerry was. I mean, Kerry, for his size... had the most power I've ever seen anybody be able to bring up. And he was agile, too. I mean, I told you he was a high jumper, a really good high jumper.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
What was it like when Flair came to town? That must have been a ride, huh? He's quite a character. Yeah, he was. He's something else. He's something else, man. You had a show with him, right? And the best time. Because he's just, he's got stories and he likes to, you know, it's fun. He's all fun all the time. And there's no other side to it, really.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
real gentleman he's got a great voice you know when you hear his voice you think that should be a radio man yeah you know he really does sound good but but when he comes to your town he's going to give an interview and that's going to rile i don't care who you are he's going to make you furious and you're going to come down and see him get his butt kicked and so he that's you got to have that you know that's that that's rick now harley harley race and uh and the other champions uh the uh
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
throwing a blank, but I mean the Briscoes. And they were great, but each had something else they brought to the table. Harley was, you know, he had his rep at all of his different holes and moves. But Rick, what an interview he gives. And he's got the experience, too. You know, he's something else. And he's got a good head for when to do what he does. But you see what I mean? A guy like me,
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
really really wouldn't fit the bill like rick would right because gonna and he's gonna bump all night he doesn't ever get tired you know he's uh he's gonna have he's gonna be dragging out to an hour or he's gonna try to yeah just magnetic man that was a magnetic time he is um what was one of the most traumatic things that happened to one of your brothers in their life while they were alive um was there anything that kind of started changed their life a little bit that we didn't really see as much
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
So I'm assuming that's where you guys all kind of got into it. Yeah, yeah. Just even knew about it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Well, probably so, yeah. My little brother Mike, you know, with the toxic shock syndrome, we were wrestling in Tel Aviv, and we were going to do some shows in Lebanon, too. And so Mike saw a wrestling guy, but his shoulder had been... and he popped it back in the dressing room, got back out there in the ring, and it popped out again, and it had really popped out bad this time.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Yeah, this is, you know, it's kind of an ugly turn. I don't want to bum me out, but my dad was living up in New York, and we were all living up there, and I was a baby, but my brother Jackie was like six years old, and he touched a house trailer that had a short in it, and it killed him. It electrocuted him.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
So we flew him back to Texas to get surgery, and with the incision, he got toxic shock syndrome. It's a tampon thing ladies get, but they had such a huge incision where the arm was or the— shoulder was that they had shaft gauze in there. Oh, and some of it had gotten left in. I think that might... It didn't get left in, but it got septic or something, maybe.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
But whatever it was, his fever went up to so high, 106, 100, I even heard 107, but that... It didn't kill him, though. In fact, the doctor came down. I say, Tim, you wouldn't believe it. The hospital was filled with fans. They wanted to offer their kidneys or their liver to Mike. Such love. But the docs told us that his fever is too high.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
He's not going to come back, and he's not going to make it through the night. And so rather than go up there and say goodnight, like you told us to, then we had—my parents were down in this waiting room at the hospital up here at Baylor. And we had—Gary Holder was—we had a chaplain that would go with us to shows, you know, big shows.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
And he gave a prayer where he talked about, he said, God, you say anything we ask in Jesus' name, then you will do it. So we're asking you to stand on your word. And he slammed that Bible down on the desk. Man, I wanted to hide my head. I thought he went too far, you know. But it was just a few seconds later, the door opened up. And he said, the fever's broken. There's hope.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
And we ran up to see Mike. Just like that. It was... And David Manning was right there. My dad was there. My mom, Carrie, saw it. It was a miracle. It was really a miracle. Beautiful, but... I don't want to get in an argument with people, but I would love, like I told you, I'd like my life to have an experience that people could benefit from.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
If you're somebody that's like maybe I was at a time like... Life is overwhelming. And you know what? It's like when you overcome something, you're so much a better man than you were before. It's like when you're pushed to your limit and you have to adjust or die, you get stronger. You get stronger.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
And I would just say to anybody that's out there lost, if you want to feel like you'll never be afraid of man or beast again, you will not be afraid of dying if you know where you're going to go when you die. And, I mean, I know where I'm going to go. I have no fear. I mean, it's a great life.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Did you have a religion instilled in you when you were growing up? Did you have like a... No.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
That's the thing. We went to church on Easter, you know, I remember. But this is a pretty odd story. But I spent the night with my dad's real estate partner. He's a doctor. And I spent the night with him one night. And the next day was Sunday. And they took me to church with them. And so I went to church. And so...
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
knocked him out and he hit a puddle of frozen water was frozen he drowned under the ice you know and broke my dad's heart my mother you know it just killed him you know I can't imagine I have sons you know that I tell you Theo I lost my brothers and that was hard but I could not lose a son wow yeah I couldn't get up I couldn't stand on my hind legs you know
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
And the only reason I went is because if you spend the night, you're going to sleep with the dog, and I love their dog. Oh, yeah, dude.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
I've stayed over places just to be by the animals.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Well, we go to church, and these men surround me and ask me if I want to accept Jesus. And so I knew that song, Jesus Loves Me, you know. And I'd been to wrestling before, and I'd seen people poke the finger and stuff. And I knew that was bad, you know, when I thought, I don't want to be bad. I want to be good, you know.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
So I want to be on that side, you know, because I've kind of seen a little of both worlds, you know.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
This was choosing not to be a heel for eternity, I mean.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Well, you know, now that I understand what was going on, because I was just a little boy, you know, so I said the prayer, you know, and they asked me if I believed Jesus died. You know, I did. And I felt something move in my, something weird in my chest. And I thought somebody, there were men standing behind me. I thought they did something to me like, but I actually felt something move inside me.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
And I think it was that little bit of evidence gave me a lot of courage. And I knew God was with me. I knew he was. And that night, I got out of my bed, and I looked on my porch. I was just looking at the outside, the stars. And I'm a little boy. I could have imagined it, but I could have sworn I saw an angel fly across the field with a horn in his mouth, like it was a blown horn.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
I didn't hear any sound. It looked just like a Christmas ornament, a Christmas tree, but... But in my mind, this was my best day of my life, and I belong to God now. And I've never been afraid of anything since then.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Amen. Yeah, it's interesting. I think sometimes people get scared to share their testimonies or moments that they've had where they've just felt like something stronger than them took care of them. Yeah, I remember a feeling one time where I was just broken down, man. I was...
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
really banged up about a relationship and just not sure what i wanted to do with my life i'd move back in with my step parents and man i remember one time i was just well just on my knees bawling and i felt something come around my heart man i can't even explain it just like this this warm thing just i mean i'd never felt where my heart was i mean i'd put my hand on it hoping for the best when i was pledging allegiance he's knocking on the door you
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
And you're all alone, suffering like that. God, that was God, Theo. Yeah. He came to you. You know, we got one lifetime to learn it, you know, that there is such a thing. I mean, let me tell you, there is a devil. And people want to say there's no such thing, but there is, boy. I could tell you a really weird story, but it's... 100% true. Yeah. I mean, your life's full of craziest stories ever.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Listen to this one. Okay, so I'm going to wrestle Big Daddy King Kong Bundy and Will Rogers Coliseum in Fort Worth. So I'm on the way to the ring. Kerry said, Kev, come here. I said, what, Kerry? He said, I was dead on the phone. Mike's just been in a terrible car wreck. He's dying now. Dad said, don't try to get there fast because he'll be dead before we get there anyway. And I said, what?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Did they have to go to therapy and stuff like that when that first happened to your... Because I guess that was your oldest brother.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
And so I ran to the ring. I said, ring the bell. I ring the bell. I grabbed Bundy's leg, schoolboyed him, one, two, three, ran to the back, Kerry, and I hauled out to the hospital. still in my rust and stuff. And so we get there and there's cops everywhere and they're standing by the doors and I run right into them, I bust open and there's this black lady out there and she said, my baby, my baby.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
And when I crashed those doors open, there's a little black kid laying there dead, blood and stuff. So I go out the other door, open the door, and there's Mike. Hey, Kev, he was fine, just fine. And so I'm like, I'm numb, you know? And so I knew my parents were on their way down here, and so I go outside. And I see them walking down the ramp, and I said, he's okay.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
And my dad just about fell down. My mom, oh, they fell down. Well, so I'm going to get my car to come home. And Abilene is west, but Denton is north. Well, for some reason, I went west. And I went almost to Abilene, Eastland. I was so out of it, just driving. By the time I got home, I was so sleepy. The sun had already come up. Pam had been waiting for me.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Yeah. Did they have therapy back then and stuff like that, or what did you... No, no, there was no... My dad was like a rock, though, you know. I couldn't believe he was... He just... He didn't want my mother to suffer so we wouldn't suffer around her, but I'm sure my mother suffered.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
And so I was going to take my bulldog down to the lake and wash him. I had Castiel soap, you know, it's okay for the environment. And I was washing my dog. And, oh, I'm sorry. I'm sorry. Maybe it's concussions. But before that, I said, God, thank you for giving me my brother back. Let me fight the devil. I said, Satan, I'll fight you. I'll fight you. And... and said, let me fight him, God.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
It was stupid, a stupid boy. And so I go to the lake, I'm washing my dog and Theo, I swear this happened. So my dog, everything's real still. And I'm feeling weird a little bit. And I look and I see, There's a bush here and some more bushes here and a hill here. And I see these little black things taking position against me and advancing on me. I felt like I could smell blood. I could smell death.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
And I said, get in the car, Pam. And I put my back to the car and I was like this. And I would see them going from trees. They're getting these positions and I was ready. And next thing I know, I'm out. I'm having a seizure in my car. And so Pam's screaming and crying, and these fishermen have run up to help, and I must have hit one or kicked one or something.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
But a girl ran up and said, I know his parents. I'll get them. And an ambulance came and all that, but I know it's because I'm a man, and I challenge the devil. And we have Jesus in us that fights the devil. We don't have anything to do with the devil.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
and so that was that was my lesson that i learned but i know that happened and it's just in me like written on my heart and with a nail you know look it's a testimony man yeah i thank you for sharing that yeah i think sometimes we don't think that the devil is real and that's it that is the devil's way to trick us i believe that yeah you know if you don't think that evil's real then it's how quick you don't know how close it is to you either you know you don't know how intertwined it could be in your own veins if you don't even believe it's real
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Yeah, and we think with a man's mind. The devil is an angel's mind. I mean, he's way smarter than we are.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
The devil is a thug. That is the truth, man. Thank you for sharing that. I've had friends share some really... Some strong testimonials, some moments where they just felt that, you know? I mean, there has been moments in my life where, yeah, I just felt... You just get that feeling. So now, as you ever get overcome with that feeling, you're just so thankful that God has been with you.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Man, because you thought you did it yourself, and you realize you didn't, that God was there with you. Man, when I've had that feeling come over me, God. I mean, it just... It'll... You almost feel like you thaw out some, you know, like you thaw out.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Also, when she got married, her little brother, David, died of a brain hemorrhage thing, what he called it, a tumor, a brain tumor. And so just like a year later, her son dies, too. It was just bang, bang.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
And then we get to a position where something bad comes along. Oh, God, don't let this happen. And he saves us again. I'm like, oh, I forgot the other times too, you know.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
You're the little southern boy. I know what kind of... You caught copperheads and water moccasins and stuff like that, I'm sure.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Oh, I definitely... I got electrocuted a bunch. I was definitely beaten a lot. Yeah, we got bit by things, attacked. I got attacked by a bunch of stray animals. I grew up in the stray animal belt. Really? So they had just... What kind of stray animals? Oh, anything, brother. Snakes, raccoons, birds.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
dogs man they uh i don't even know just they had dogs wearing jewelry all kind of shit was out there looking for us you got a good memory it was dangerous out there well um you know i used to get i got chased by a goose when i was a little kid by ghost a goose oh a goose yeah i'd rather a damn ghost Gooses are dangerous, dude. Well, they can bite, you know, but for little kids, scary.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
They don't care, and they're violent. And, dude, a goose will come at you to just be one of them. Some animals will have five or six of them. Raccoons are like that, you know. Ants are like that. You know, they won't come at you just one. But a goose, that thing will roll up on you solo. That's pretty savage when you think of it. Is that you? That's a goose that's thinking Rambo. That's crazy.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
What were your parents' lives like? Are your parents still alive?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Yeah, they are. Yeah, we had my mother. You know, when we moved out, I couldn't move to Kauai without taking my mom with me. Oh, she took your mom with you? Yeah. Oh, dude. And she lived in the house with us, too. Did she love it there? You know, my dad used to wrestle in Japan a lot, and so we would meet him in Hawaii sometimes. And I didn't realize it, but Hawaii reminded her of her sons.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
And she didn't want to go anywhere. She wanted to stay in her room and she wanted to grow her flowers. And that was it. She just, she did love it. She loves her flowers, you know, but it was like, it reminded her too much of that. But she, and she passed away up in our guest room upstairs in Hawaii.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
But all my granddaughters and my son's wives were standing around her singing hymns while she passed away. And Theo, before she died, she was a super good woman. She was so sweet and thoughtful to everyone. When she'd come to school, I'd be so proud of her, you know, because all the kids would like her. But when she was laying in that bed and she breathed her last breath,
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Even as she, like that, her hand went up like that. And I could just picture touching Jesus' hands and going to heaven, you know. She was probably ready to go see her sons, huh? Oh, I know she was. You know, my dad. I didn't tell you all this personal stuff, buddy, but.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
For our best features, get the new Visible Plus Pro plan for $45 a month. Terms apply. See visible.com for plan features and network management details. Today's guest is a WWE Hall of Famer. He's a member of one of the greatest wrestling families of all time, the Von Eriks. You may have seen their family story told recently in The Iron Claw. He's an inspiration. He's a motivation.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
I mean, and at those times, too, things... I think there was more probably tragedy at those times. You know, things were, you know, you'd have a lot of, people had a lot of children and a lot of them working farming and people would get injured a lot. There was just, I think it was a different time probably when it came to safety and stuff. You know, and they'd have loose wires.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Well, I could match you if you need, but we've heard my stories a lot. No, I just can't imagine. I bet she was ready to go see her sons, you know. I bet she'd been gone away from them long enough.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
And, you know, my dad, too. Because really, when you think about it, my dad lost more than my mom. My dad lost his sons, but he didn't ever show it. I mean, but he hurt. He was hurting, but he was like... It was just that he... At his latter, at the final days, he was so torn up inside. I think when he saw me, it would remind him of all the sons he'd lost. And he pulled that 44 out one day, and...
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
And he pointed his head like, I'm just going to shoot myself. No, don't do it. Don't do it, Dad. And he pointed the gun at me. And I said, he said, you're afraid to die, aren't you? He said, you'd have the guts. You'd do it too if you had the guts. And I said, Dad, it doesn't take guts to live. I mean, it'd take guts to kill yourself, Dad. It'd take guts to stay alive on this earth.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
And he was hurting so much. He would just go, oh, God. He'd rub his face to go, oh, God. And when I'd hear that, I actually wanted him to die. I wanted him to pass away. He was just miserable. And I know that when he died, he was right there with Dave Carey. It was beautiful. But my dad had gotten away. He said, look, son, if you kick an old dog enough times, he's going to bite you.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
And that's how I am with God right now. He's kicked me too many times. And so I said, Dad, it's going to be, you're going to be so surprised. But I couldn't convince him of it, you know.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Yeah, I can't imagine what it's like to be kind of the surviving son. Did you feel chosen or did you feel deserted? Does that question make any sense to you? Sure. It's funny you say that.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Yeah, because I felt... Chosen in the way that my dad gave me a tape recorder back when I was in fifth grade. It was a bell and howl, you know, and you could talk into it. I couldn't believe I could hear my voice. Yeah. You know, and so I thought, I love my dad so much, I filled the tape up.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Okay, one day dad's going to die, and I'm going to talk, and here I am alive while he's still alive, and so I'm going to say something to make me feel better. Man, I'm sorry, Kev. Sorry, buddy. I just filled the tape up with that. Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Yeah, yeah, like I can comfort myself later when out of work.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
That's so interesting. But I remember saying, Dave and Kerry, we loved each other so much, I thought, I can't bear to lose them. I could not bear it. And I thought, but they love me that way. And so I said this, even in a prayer, I said, God, if one of us has to stand back, if one of us has to be the only one, let it be me. Wow. Because I'm hard and I'm strong inside. Lord, God made me that way.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
I mean, just things were just less regulated, you know.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
But I didn't know it would ever happen, but I did say it, you know.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
You know, I used to have, I mean, this is like silly, but like, so when I was growing up, I didn't have any, like whenever my dad died, I didn't have any thing of his, right? I didn't have like a shirt or like a button or just anything to remember him by, you know? And so I used to write postcards to my kids, right?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Yeah, that's right. It was, you know, the kind of stuff we did as kids. Like, shoot, I can tell you a lot of times it took you to be alive, you know.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Whenever I was on the road, just traveling over the years doing comedy, I would write postcards to my kids. I don't have any kids yet. But I would send them postcards just so in the future they would be able to see that I was thinking of them, right? Yeah. Like I just wanted – I wanted to prove – That's so smart, bro. But I just think it's the same type of thing.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
It's like you're just trying to like – I don't know. You're always thinking of like how do I make sure that every – That somebody knew I cared or that somebody knew somebody else cared.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Yes. I'm going to die someday. It's just stuff like that is interesting. I think a lot of people do little things like that. But that's interesting because you could have felt like you were deserted. Yeah. But to end up feeling that you were chosen, that's pretty powerful.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Well, I don't think I'd say that we're chosen more like I'd say that I would not want to put them through that.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
then I think I would not want them to go through it. I would rather me go through it than they did. And I think God might have given me some credit for that, you know, because it's all about this. We're in a struggle, you know. It's like we're not...
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Oh, God, I've been lit up a couple of times. Damn. Yeah. I was walking by a damn crab restaurant and stepped on an outlet. You did? Just took me down, brother. Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
on this earth to laugh it up and have fun we have tests real tests and life is hard and that kind of stuff that kicks you in the nuts is what makes you stronger yeah makes you more strong and without that you can't give advice to people about things you haven't been around you know but once you've had it and been and suffered yourself now you can say listen up
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
With that said, like, um, and I agree, you know, I was just thinking about that the other day.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
It's like, I've always had this outlook and they kind of don't teach you that when you're a kid as much that, and they really shouldn't when you're a young child, but I think they should teach you at some point that life is a test, that it is full of a lot of tests and it's not all just going to be like this perfect thing or everything might not work out the way you think it is.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
You know, you never really kind of get that education maybe, or maybe some parents do give it to their kids. Um, But with what you said a second ago, if you had to share something with somebody who had lost a sibling or who had dealt with, you know, some grief from loss, something that you've learned because, I mean, you're like almost the Neil Armstrong of loss.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
I mean, you've endured a lot in your life, you know, and watched other loved ones endure a lot, you know. What have you kind of learned that you feel like you could share, if anything? Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Well, thank you for giving that opportunity because that's what I want to do is to try to make it positive for somebody, buddy. But, you know, it's tough because I want to tell people, like, when somebody dies, it's going to get better, but it doesn't get better, man. You don't even get used to it. It's just keep tolerating it, and you just somehow it gets a little better someday. Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Something. I don't know. Next thing you know, I just thought the earth was just sucking me into it. How long were you out? I don't know. Probably 40 seconds, maybe. Wow. Not long enough to give up, I guess.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
There's no good word to say to them, but when somebody's really busted up, you know, and when you overcome that and are able to maintain through that, well, then it's now you've achieved through a struggle. You've achieved over an obstruction. You've gone over a hurdle, you know, and it's like, Now you can say you won.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Now you can say you won something because without a fight, there can't be a winner. There can't be a champion. There can't be a success unless there's that adversity, you know? And so God wouldn't put you through that unless you're going to benefit. And Theo, you've got a great mind. You're an intelligent guy, I can tell. Oh, thanks, man. Life is knocking on your door too, my friend.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
You two, I feel like you and me are probably pretty similar in some ways. You feel that? Sure do. I do too. Um, do you, uh, was how, how, how therapeutic was having your own family for you?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Everything, man. That was what did it is what saved me because, uh, man, when you can have anything you want, you know, and your brothers can have anything they want, and they come over and let's go do this, let's go do that, it's like, what a life. I mean, it's a whole lot, but... I don't mean to bum me out, man. I don't want to start bumming out.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
I don't feel like you're bumming me out at all.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
No, I was just thinking like, well, I was going to ask you what's something that you admire about each one of your children, and then I was going to ask you what's something that you, maybe like something funny or something silly that you kind of admire or maybe miss, something goofy or something about each one of your brothers maybe.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Just like a nice, like a band they like to listen to, just something like that.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Oh, yeah. Well, we love good music. I can tell you. I've never told anybody this story. But we had like a tree house, but it was built on stilts, a little room on stilts, my dad made us. And so we had a cut. My mother was a third oldest, but she had an older sister. And so her older sister came over, and she had two sons, and they could pick on us, you know.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
You didn't have, like, an experience beyond the door.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
And so we were hiding up there, and they were trying to get up. We'd pull the rope up, wouldn't let them go, and we had rocks. We were throwing rocks at them. Yeah. And so it got really bloody, you know, we're chunking rocks and hitting each other.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
And, you know, and so I think I'll let one go and hit one of the guys right in the head, you know, and my cousin would have kicked my ass if he could have caught me, you know, but. But so he runs in the house to tell on me, so we'll get in trouble, you know. And so me, Dave, and Carrie come down from the tree house, you know. We're watching out.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
I didn't get anything. I'm like, God's not giving me any previews or nothing, you know?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
They're not going to ambush us and beat us up all over the house, you know. But they run to the house to tell on us, you know, so we run up there. And so the guy's bleeding. My cousin's bleeding. My cousin Steve's bleeding all over the place. And Dad said, what the hell happened? And I was about to feel something down. Carrie said, Dad.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
He got a little razor blade, cut his head, and my dad started cracking up laughing, you know. And so Dave and I kind of go with the story, you know, and I think he started laughing and just let it go. But I think back on that, Kerry was such a cute little kid, you know. He was lying about it, huh? He did. He was that way. He was quick, huh?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Another time we were riding in the car and my friend had a BB gun. So we were riding on the BB gun and shooting signs and warning lights and stuff, you know. So we drive by pickup and he shoots the windshield. Of your own vehicle? No, no. It was a friend of ours. A friend of ours, an old man that had a ranch just south of us. You blew it out? I shot the window out.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
That's true, actually. If you start seeing the light, I'm like, nah, nah. So, yeah, so your family had that. So your parents had to deal with that so early, man. Yeah, I guess people suffered in silence more back then, huh?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
And the cops were going to get us, you know, and we're running from them and all and got in such trouble. And so we're answering for it all. We got away. And so they weren't sure that we were the ones, you know. And so the cops were all talking to us. And my dad was there. And I hear my dad say, my sons won't lie to me. So I'll ask them, my sons will not lie to me.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
And so he calls Kerry over there. And Kerry had already lied to him, you know. And so I heard Dad say that. He said, come here, Kev. And Kerry's over there. We're going with the lie, you know, but I'm busted. And so I'm going to say, I can't get the word to Kerry. I get it to Dave. Dave can't get it to Kerry. And I said, yes, sir, Dad, we did it. We all did it. And I said, Kerry, come here, son.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Kerry, look me in the eye. I want you to tell me the truth. Did you do it? He said, no, sir, dad. I swear. Oh, man. So Kerry could lie.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Kerry could lie. That's all right. Somebody's got to lie, man. And what about Chris? What was something that was fun or just neat about him? What was something he liked to do?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Well, he loved Indian stuff, you know, and he had a, so he had, he stacked the rocks and all and Indian stuff. He knew all about Chief Bowles and the Wonka Tonka. I don't know.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Wompum, something like that. He knew a lot of Native American lore.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Yeah, he loved all that stuff. And so where they lived, they had all arrowheads and spearheads. He found that stuff all the time. So that's what he was really doing. But he was a great artist. He could draw anything, you know. So I thought that, but he was, he had asthma. And so because he had to take medicine, it made his bones brittle. And he just wasn't going to get big and strong.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
When he worked out, it didn't really do anything.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Well, y'all took all the bigness, too. If he was the last one, y'all didn't leave any bigness for him.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
That's what I thought. I thought maybe we took all the big because, man, he wanted to be big. I could have cared less, but he wanted to be big so bad.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
And what about Mike? What was something that Mike liked to do? What kind of music did he listen to?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Well, I was just going to say, you know, you brought up the movie, and the movie was like, I heard a lot of people talk about it. It was like... The iron claw movie? Yeah, you know, that my dad was really hard on us when the fact was, you know, that we were hard on each other. You know, we answered each other. It was like a brother thing, really. And the...
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Did y'all ever go to any concerts together? Always. A lot of concerts together, yeah. What was one y'all went to?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
ZZ Top, loved them. But those about to rock. Isn't that ACDC? We went to a Foghat concert, and I think the band that warmed up for them was... I Am Just a Cowboy, Road Runs Trail, Story Nights, Campfire Lights. What was that song? The Cowboy song.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Cowboy song by Thin Lizzy. I haven't heard that. I've got to listen to that one.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Oh, that's a great song. And that was going to be Dave's song. See, I picked the music. But with Kerry picked his song.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
I always did the music. And I picked that song for Dave. But he said, no, Kev, I'm a cowboy. And he picked, when I die, I may not go to Texas. It was nothing. You want music.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Yeah, but I mean. Good God. But it was terrible for Go to the Ring, too.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
You want to sound like an interesting sound and a crescendo and you'll kick the door off and the lights and all. So you don't want something like that.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
And he's blasting some damn Shania Twain or whatever. Yeah. Yeah. That's different level, man. Okay. And so, and Jack had passed away before you. What about Kerry? What's something you remember about him that you like? Shoot. Kerry was just. Were y'all the closest probably?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Well, me, Dave, and Kerry were real close. And then Mike was our baby, you know, so we were really close. But, you know, Chris was a little bit... I told you about the divorce thing when I was a kid. One thing my mother insisted on my dad was that my dad not discipline Mike and Chris like he did me, Dave, and Kerry. Because he used a leather strap on us, you know.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
My principal beat me in office one time, a couple times, I think. It was back when your principal could spank you.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Yeah, I've been beating her too. I mean, you know, we had it coming.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Well, you know, if we got away with it, we'd just have done it again.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Look, he got me. I got over on him more times than he got over on me. I'll tell you that, Mr. Brady.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Yeah, we did. Of course, I hated school. I hated it. I don't know if you did or not.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Oh, if I could wrestle good, I wouldn't like damn spelling.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Well, I wasn't wrestling then, you know. I was a little kid. I had to do my homework and all that stuff, but I had to listen to all that junk in class and about— And Susie has two dresses and, you know, all that crap. I couldn't stand it. I was bored to death. And I just, and I'm not a very good parent. I told you, I just, when I see little boys, I say, I hated school.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
To tell the truth, the suicides and all, that was not because Fritz made us wrestle or Fritz was a big monster or anything like that. That was a shame. My brothers were ashamed. With Kerry, when you're in the public eye, you really feel a lot of pressure. You really do. You don't want to let those kids down. When something happens, you do feel like you really let them down.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
I wouldn't, I don't blame you for not wanting to go. You know, there's a lot better stuff to do. You got a dog, you got a BB gun, and that's all you need, you know?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
When you think back, what about your own parenting? So you have four children? Yeah. Okay. And what are they like? You have two boys and two girls?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Yeah, two boys and two girls. Well, my oldest two are daughters, Kristen and Jill. And Kristen has always been my soft spot. I love her so much, and she's brilliant. everything for us. She's such a good foster mom. In Hawaii, she'd take the kids for the police. What do you call the idea? Oh, CPS? CPS. She would get those kids. And then for foster parents, they loved her there.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
And so many people that loved her in Hawaii, so many kids. And then there's my daughter, Jill. She was way more like me. She's like, she can swim. Endlessly. I've swam out to reefs before that were way too far for anybody without a boat. She'll swim out there without flippers and go down and dive with lobsters with me and grab them with her hands too.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
I mean, I'm using gloves, but she's just, she's something else. She can run like a deer. And she loves it. And her sons are all athletic. I could go overboard talking about her. She's such an athlete. And then there's Ross and Marsh.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
And Ross and Marshall got into wrestling. Yeah. Were you scared when they got into wrestling, or did you have any thoughts about it, or that's just what they wanted to do?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Well, not with Ross. I knew Ross, he's been an ass-kicker his whole life, and he fights easily. There's not much for a man like that to do in today's world except wrestling, and so Ross is going to be good. But Marshall... I did worry about him because Marshall was a super athlete. He went out to Hawaii, and he was the quarterback, and he was throwing the bombs.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
The newspapers were just, people just want a picture of how far he could throw the football. He was just a great athlete, but I worried about him getting that heat stroke out there, you know, because he had a heat issue one time. So that's the only time I've ever been worried of them because they're both like bulls. They're strong and healthy. I wouldn't worry about it either way.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
With their wrestling now, too, they know what they need to know. I believe that the wrestling business is about to really explode because it was just like this when my brothers and I got started. And when this COVID got in, they had to wrestle in empty buildings. I don't think I could have ever done that. Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
But, um, it made it where the fat, the people really have not seen them, uh, explode yet. They've, uh, they worked for a little, uh, uh, they went to Japan and wrestled and they worked for a little operation at MLW and now they're worth, uh, AEW.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Oh, really? AEW has been popping off. Oh yeah. I keep hearing about it all the time now.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Yeah. They're, they're going to be, they're really going to be special, I believe. And are, will they tag team? They've done both. They work tag teams right now, though. I mean, it's a lot of... You know, tag teams are such an interesting, exciting match, you know, because the guys don't have time to get a hold. But they can do either one. They can wrestle single. They can work a tag.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
But probably... They'll work a tag team. As a matter of fact, I don't want to talk out of school, but we have a neighbor in Bernie, and it's Bill Goldberg, the guy that wrestled at WWE. Oh, yeah. Yeah, he's a Texas boy, I think, isn't he, or Oklahoma?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Bill Goldberg, yeah, I think it's from Oklahoma. Or is he from Norman? No. No. Um, did you ever fight Rocky Johnson?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
And I don't know, everybody's not like this. Sometimes you just can't forgive yourself. And Kerry just couldn't let it go.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Uh, he, I was too young, but my first black and white pictures, uh, that was trying to flex, you know, and I've never, I didn't know, you know, I didn't expect to have muscles, but that's Rocky. And so Rocky's was really good at flexing. And so Rocky taught me everything about flexing. You know, he was standing right behind the cameraman doing this and doing all these things.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
And I, whatever Rocky did, I did for the picture, you know,
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Rocky's son is The Rock, you know. Oh, yeah, Dwayne Johnson. And so we would like... That's actually the picture.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
But Little Rock was there. Oh, was he? Yeah, he's a little boy. I mean, he was the cutest little kid.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
He's still alive? I don't know about that, but... Rock was a great guy, too. I mean, he was a little younger than us, you know, so we'd wrestle him. It would frustrate him to see if he'd have the courage to pep up with it, and he would, too. Who, Dwayne Johnson, The Rock? He would want to fight. That pup will bite you. He was a beautiful little kid, yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
And yeah, Kerry is one of your brothers. I know you had David, Kerry, Jack, Chris. And Mike. And Mike. And Mike. God, that's all the boy names they had at the time. Yeah. Y'all couldn't have had another brother, because what were you going to do? I'd have to be a girl. It would have had to have been a girl by default, man.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Y'all might have put that fire in him, man. What about Bruiser Brody? Remember him? Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
He was something else. Smart guy. On his workout routine, he would just put on leather gloves and lay into that heavy bag, and it thickened his chest. I mean, he did bench presses too, but he had an awesome bench press, but also – his body was built so powerfully because he had, I think he worked out different. He did a lot of strikes, you know, and that thickens joints and all.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
It makes you have kind of that raw strength, you know, and he'd had that. But if you want to talk about Puerto Rico, well, I can tell you, too, that— What happened? Well, he was killed in Puerto Rico. Oh, he was killed in Puerto Rico? Yeah. I didn't know that. Well, gosh, I never told this story, but I could tell you this one, too.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
He was—Brody was real temperamental, and he would get pissed off real easy.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
well the puerto rico wrestling office owed him about 80 grand and so my dad was president of the alliance back then and so we worked out a payout schedule where they'd pay him a little each show but brody got to that show and he wouldn't work for him because they owed him that money and so dad worked out where he would come back and boy when they came back they sold out uh um san juan
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
And it was a great crowd. Well, Brody wanted his money that night because he saw that they had it. But, you know, there are other things that they've, you know, and that's all that started. That's all that started. So he wanted his money and...
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
wasn't to be and so he kicked the guy's ass you know and the guy's a little that invader you know forgot his name but man this is an ugly story too but the guy who and so they got in a fight and the guy Brody beat him up and he knifed Brody in the shower and But this is the kind of guy, I mean, the guy that did it just about a week before that, his little daughter drowned in his swimming pool.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
So he's on edge, you know, and so I can't really, I know them both, you know, and they're both men that want to earn their living, you know, and it's sad.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Yeah. Life is, you know, like I said, we suffer, we find the beautiful moments in between those ugly ones, you know, and it's, it's good. It's got good and bad.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Yeah. I, um, I'm trying to think if there was something else that you talked about using a medicinal marijuana. How did you get into that? And then how did it help you? Do you feel like, well, if you want to talk about it, if you don't want to, that's fine.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Yeah, I did. Well, um, Well, I had a lot of knee surgeries too. And you can take a pain pill, but if you do, then it's going to take an edge off of it. And so you'll want to take more. And if you do, you're going to get in a problem. And so I didn't want pain pills. So I wanted a natural pain relief. And so I tried cannabis and I liked it. And it was just good all around for me. It was good.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
And so I actually grow it out in Kauai. And so that's how I have it. I'm so grateful for it, too. I mean, I hope they don't make it illegal again because it's like a wonder drug to me. It really was.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Oh, we wanted a girl so bad. Did y'all? Did your parents? My whole life, I never knew anything about girls, you know? Oh, yeah. Y'all had enough beautiful hair in that family.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Did you ever get involved in any other type of plant medicine or anything like that out there? I know there's like ayahuasca ceremonies and stuff like that. We've done, I've done that before. And a lot of our listeners have, I think have considered it or tried it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Yeah. There's a stuff called, oh, it's a, what's the name of that? Ka, Kif. No. Kava. What? Kava. Kava. Yeah, kava root's good for you. I say good for you. I read about the contraindications on that, and it's kind of, it can make your skin like, what do you call those things? Shingles? Scales or whatever? Scales like, yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
I guess that's if you do too much of it or something. I tried it. It's not bad for you.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
But have you ever done like ayahuasca or like a plant medicine ceremony where they put you under? I've never even heard of that.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
It's like a medicine that you take and you kind of sit in a group of the shaman and it's usually, it's like a two-day ceremony. And you kind of go through these bouts of like, it's kind of like an emotional journey that you go on. It's really fascinating.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Like a sweat lodge kind of thing maybe? Mm-hmm. Wow.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Really, really fascinating if you ever get curious about it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
I got a friend in Israel that writes comedy shows, writes soap operas, and he does that. He goes to Africa and South America and finds indigenous people and does stuff like that with them. And he does, I mean, he's a wealthy guy.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Go figure that one. Golly, I know what's with that. I never took care of myself. I never expected to live past 50. I was having fun my whole life.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Yeah, it's Aaron Rodgers. We know who it is. What's your physical routine like today for yourself, Kevin? Oh.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
physical routine yeah do you have like a daily routine or yeah uh well uh solomon comes in my bedroom about 8 45 or 9 o'clock and uh that's your grandson uh-huh and and we go either catch lizards or snakes or frogs we've caught uh we caught four rattlesnakes on our ranch last year and we caught uh king snakes and uh turtles, sea turtles, soft-shelled turtles, you name it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
That little boy and I have so much fun together. And he's the, I love him to death.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Did he remind you of any one of your brothers in particular at all or no?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Yeah, he reminds me of Marshall and Ross. It's like I'm able to be dad again, you know. It's like I enjoyed being their father so much. I really love my sons and my daughters. But having Solomon again is just like having Marshall again, you know. He's got Ross in him too, though. Yeah. Beautiful. For anybody that's wondering, Kevin Von Erich, I consider myself the luckiest guy in the world.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
I mean, I know for that movie coming out, you may not believe it, but I am happy all day, every day. And I mean, I look forward to tomorrow. And I couldn't ask for a better way things turned out. And to bitch about my brothers dying too young, the truth is we had a great time. We had a great time, a long time.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Oh, I bet. But y'all had so much dang hair. Y'all would have been considered beautiful, tall trans women these days. Y'all would have been because you guys were ahead of your time. Even like all the rock bands back then had, remember Poison, all those bands, they had the big hair. That's the truth. Y'all had some hairdos. Was that something like a pride?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Hell yeah, we're still talking about how good the time was.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
You know what I'm saying? So I can't call it a bad day.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Is there any message you think that your father or brothers felt like you think that they would want to have given but they didn't get a chance to? Is there ever anything like that? Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
I'm going to tell you something. Now, we watched my dad wrestle when we were little boys. And we had an idea to make a wrestling show that would be different. It would be two different, two hot cameras the whole time, so nothing's going to look bad on television. Just the best camera shot.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
It would have done some extra time editing, but, you know, we wanted wrestling to be, instead of the 20- and 30-minute matches, one-hour time limits, We thought 20 minutes was plenty of time for a match to just pick up the pace, you know, and just make it more intense. And I think our shows were like that. I'm proud of them. I'm proud of all of our shows.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
And my brothers and I, especially Dave and I, And Dad had a great idea one time, and it was going to be to put our new style of wrestling on the show. And it was great. We had a great TV rating, and Vince offered us a big part of his, half of his company up there to come in with him. And I sat there with my dad, and Dad said, nope, what's in it for us?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
And you never disagree with family in a business meeting. But I was thinking, He's got everything we need, Dad, everything we need. But Dad wouldn't go, wouldn't go with him. To partner with WWE, you mean? Yeah. Wow. And they're going to let Dad keep San Antonio and Dallas too. But who knows, huh? Yeah. Who knows what would have happened. Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Because there's many a slip twixt the cup and the lip, you know. But, I mean, we would have been ready. We'd have jumped all over that because we're little boys that had seen it for a whole life, and we just knew how to make it better. We'd watch the NFL, you know, and the slow motion, the collisions and all, and consorts with the lasers and all, the music, the way it...
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Pills you out of your chair, you know? We had it. We had how we wanted to do it. So, you know, that didn't come about, but we had a great time aiming at it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Yeah, and who knows? Maybe things would have been different, you know? Yeah. I mean, you guys. Yeah. I mean, I just, yeah. I mean, on behalf of like, yeah, any kid that was like me, I mean, the second you guys, they put the name on the screen or it's just, man, it was awesome, dude. You felt like everything was possible. You could fucking rip the drywall of the living room.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
You could fucking do whatever you want to do. You knew mom was coming home in an hour and a half, but you had 90 minutes until she got there where you were free as a bird, boy. I'd break every damn chair we had and then spend the next two hours gluing them bitches back together for dinner, dude.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
You would have loved to step in the business. I know you would have liked it. You would have loved it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Well, Kevin, man, thanks so much, dude. We got a show tonight.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Yeah, we got a show tonight. I'd love to take you to dinner, but you're busy.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Yeah, tonight I'll be busy, but you know what? I think I'm going to be down to Austin in September.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Oh, you are? Shoot, call me up, man. I'll show you Texas.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
When I am, I'll come out and see the ranch, man. Do it. That would be cool. That would be, man. What plants do you guys have out there?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Yeah, do you plant any avocados or anything like that here in Texas or no?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Oh, no, no. It won't grow in the subtropics. But I say that, I went to Israel, you know, it's on the 33rd degree ladder from the equator. I mean, that's way far north. They have mangos there, papayas. I couldn't believe it. Yeah, they got everything. Can't grow that in Texas.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Was that almost like a lion's mane type of thing amongst the guys in your household? Or what was that like for you guys? Because you guys had some great hair.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Yeah, you can't grow that in Texas, huh? But you can grow a batch of Von Eriks, dude, that are pretty damn impressive. I'll say that. Sure can. Kevin, thanks so much for your time, man. Just thanks for you and your family. Just all the enjoyment and excitement and invigoration and possibility over the years. I think it's inspired a lot of people and was so much fun as a kid.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
When you guys came on the screen, just getting to be a Von Erik for a few minutes. It was fun, man. It was a lot of fun.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
And I'll think about it. And, you know, when we get some stress built up, you know, you can just get in the ring and kick ass.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
That's a motto for life, guys. Those days are gone. But they're pretty close in our minds, you know. Yep, right there. You can still feel them right on the edge of your skin sometimes. Dang right. Dude, I'll beat the shit out of somebody in the lobby here if we need to.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Well, let's find a quiet spot, and I'll take you down somewhere, and we can make a little news.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
No, you know what? It was just laziness to tell the truth. I mean, you know, I cut it to keep it out of my eyes, you know, but then I cut my own hair, you know, because I'm not paying that kind of money.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Kevin, my dear, thanks so much, man. My pleasure, buddy.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Yeah, well, I can't see the back, you know. I don't have a mullet on purpose, you know. But I can cut this up here, you know.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
So your dad, I do want to know a little bit more about him. So you said that the film kind of portrayed him as being more of a stickler. But what was he like? Was he a businessman? Was he quiet? I mean, I guess he wasn't quiet because I could see like his wrestling persona. But was his home persona like, well, I guess what was he like as a father? And what was he like as a businessman?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
But let me tell you, my dad was like a mountain of a man. He was... He was really a considerate, full of love God, but I mean, he was serious. And when he would, he wouldn't say anything. Like, you know, before you go to sleep at night, you think, oh man, I wish I'd have said that. Wish I'd have thought of that. Well, he thought of it right then. And he would say it right then.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
No, I mean like whenever the subject came up. Yeah, whenever he thought of it. It was just right there. I thought, man, perfect answer. You know, but I mean, he was the president. Okay, you know that movie, The Iron Claw, where Fritz says, the NWA always wanted to screw me. You know, kind of like, but the truth is he was the NWA. He was the president, you know. And he was the other wrestlers.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
He's pretty funny. And I just feel honored to be able to spend time with him today. Today's guest is Kevin Von Erik.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
I mean, world champions. I mean, when my dad came in the room, I mean, they were like – rolling on their backs like dogs. They respected him? Well, I mean, yeah. Are they feared him because of his business acumen? I think it was his business acumen. I really do. And the way he shaded himself, he didn't ever pop off. He didn't ever brag. He always had the...
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
accurate thing to say that not too much emotion at all just business and and people respected that i think in the wrestling business we have a lot of personalities you know the big egos and sometimes these guys don't want to do something you know and uh but my dad had the respect and it made a great business. It just, I think you have to have that in you.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Myself, man, you can talk me out of anything, you know, Oh, is that all the money you have? Well, I'll take less. You know, I know why I'm like that. We're not like my dad at all. He was, he was great.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
He was a business guy. He was. Yeah. And what was he like with your mom? Like, do you have a nice memory of them being together? Like some, like a moment that you remember that was, um, that meant something to you?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Yeah, I guess so. One time I was in the den, and my mom and dad were kind of whispering, and they disappeared. And my brothers were really young. So they went into the little study there, I guess, to talk. And I thought, they've been in there a long time. So I took the little coat hanger and straightened it out, and pushed it in the door and opened it up. You know, they were at it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
And I was like, oh, man. The way—so— As a little boy, I thought, why are they so mad? Why are they so mad about it? It sounded like they were having fun.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
I just felt like I needed to go in there and break this up, whatever it is. That was kind of one of those moments. Break this up? You bring a whistle in there?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
That's hilarious. Break. She needs air. That's really something you remember, though?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Yeah, I remember that. I'm trying to think of that beautiful moment. That's what came up.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
So everybody was wrestling, huh? I guess so. Wow. Did you feel like you had to be a wrestler in your family? Like, was it?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
Well, you know, the truth of it is my dad didn't want us to wrestle, you know. In fact, you know, he was so – his finger was stuck, you know, and his hands didn't move right. Oh, yeah, he probably walked around like a damn crossing guard. Oh, God, he was. And his lower back and knees. And so, you know, I actually said to my sons – You don't want to do this, I promise.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
You know, here we are in Hawaii, and I can't even run on the beach. And I was a high hurdler, you know. I used to high jump over my head, you know, and I loved to move. But a day comes, you know, where you traded that, traded that away, you know. So I told my boys, you don't want this, you know, you really don't. But you can't tell them that. You know, they were just like I was.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
I wanted to do what my dad did. I thought he was great. So did my brothers, you know. We thought...
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
everything he did was great we thought and that's why i wanted to do like that i'm sure my sons are thinking the same stuff you know well i think there's nothing more there's something inside of a son you just want to make your dad proud you know you want him to look at you and and yeah just feel a sense of pride that goes deep yeah yeah i mean i think it's probably the deepest thing that there is me too i really i don't think there's anything less i mean you
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#576 - Kevin Von Erich
You ask anybody, do you feel like your dad's proud of you? It's like that, you know, it really takes them to a place when they're thinking about that or answering that, you know? Yeah. Were there... Was people using steroids and stuff back then? I used to use steroids in high school. Was it a thing when you guys were growing up or no? Yeah, it was. It sure was. They...
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
You know, I just went through this on my phone and computer. I had to get it all figured out. I was paying for extra services that I didn't want. You know, they had some different annual, some of them were annual, some of them were monthly. There were things I couldn't believe I was still involved in. Rocket Money helped me figure that all out.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
Oh, yeah. Well, you have people, too, who lost their grandfathers, who lost their siblings, who lost their great grandfathers to helping liberate other groups and helping around the world, helping be those military presence around the world, you know, and who served.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
And they thought that that meant something, you know, that there was some value, that it meant something, that the American flag hasn't hadn't just been pitted by Americans. hadn't just been divided as if it was a conservative emblem. That's crazy to think that somebody got fucking half of America to think that the American flag stands for like rednecks or something. Think about that shit.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
People don't want to think about that. People don't want to think that... Oh, that's true. There's a little part of me that caught – that took that bait. You know what I'm saying? And wondering who has put the bait in front of you. And then see the hook, man. There's a fucking hook.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
Like what are we even talking about now? And then I think that that's all changed. It's like you have Democrats that are Republicans now. You have people that don't know. You have a ton of people that want to be libertarians that don't know what it is. And so that's one of the reasons why I think we wanted to learn from you what it is. What does a libertarian idea of health care look like?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
And, or yeah, freedom of religion. They hate any of that. There was all these, it was like, but the only way you could get that information was through like the main network. Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
Yeah, there's another part in that book where Marty Makary, that doctor who's just, who got, is going to be appointed by Trump. He talked about how, yeah, there was a guy whose father had like a stroke and they kept him in the hospital and they could do a procedure. And they're like, it's like $150,000. And the guy's like, what the fuck? We can't do that.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
And they just, they kept kind of like holding them off. And eventually they're like, yeah, it's $15,000. Yeah, it's just insane. Every couple of days, they would just call him back like, we'll do it now, we'll do it now. And he was visiting America from another country, and he decided just to go back to his own country and have it done there.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
But he was just shocked at how just the price went down because they were going to possibly lose the patient, right? Which is the way that businesses should be, the potential that you could lose the customer. What about the Federal Reserve? What is it? And is it fucking us? Oh, yeah. Totally. Oh, it's the worst thing. I've heard about this. Ben Askren.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
It's the worst thing about our government is the Federal Reserve. Because I noticed this. If I make money and I pay taxes on it, right? And then if I use that money to pay somebody for something, they have to pay taxes on it. If I die... I get taxed like 30, 40 percent on the money that I'd already paid taxes on.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
Let's order that book, The Creature from Jekyll Island.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
We'll have to order it right now, but let's go back to that Federal Reserve. It's a great book.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
The federal government sets the salaries of the board's seven members, seven of the board's seven governors, and it receives all the system's annual profits after dividends on member banks' capital investments are paid. The Federal Reserve earned a net income of $100.2 billion in 2015 and transferred $97.7 billion to the U.S. Treasury. So they make some money in there. They made $5 billion.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
Well, so basically – Let me say the gold standard was a monetary system that linked a country's currency to a set amount of gold. So our currency was actually backed by an actual gold. Yes.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
Yeah, the gold standard was largely abandoned during the Great Depression before being reinstated in a limited form.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
Today's guest is a comedian, a podcaster, and a social commentator. You know him from his show, Part of the Problem, and you also know him from Legion of Skanks with Big Jay and Luis J. Gomez. We get into a lot of topics in this one, one of them being the Israel and Palestine conflict. which we've been learning about on this show over the year.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
Is that right? And that standard was that for every ounce of gold, we had so much money, $35. And then other countries had penned their currency to the dollar.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
They can print as much money as they want to with no limit. It says the Nixon shock was the effect of a series of economic measures, including wage and price freezes, surcharges on imports, and the unilateral cancellation of the direct international convertibility of the United States dollar to gold.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
Although Nixon's actions did not formally abolish the existing Bretton Woods system of international financial exchange, the suspension of one of its key components effectively rendered the Bretton Woods system inoperative. Wow. And what happened to all the gold in Fort Knox then? Your guess is as good as mine. Can we look that up?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
What happened to all the gold after the Bretton Woods system happened?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
You know, we got to get in that bitch. I'm going to ask Trump if I get to see him. Vance would give us an honest answer, I think. Are you going to the inauguration? I think I'm going to go because – well, first of all, I got excited to go. I got invited to go. And then I never will get to go again. Are you going?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
Yeah, you have to go. Yeah. And I love that you always seem to have like this open-ended, like you're not really, you're not attached. You don't, it feels like you don't really attach yourself to, you don't get overly attached.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
I think it's not good for you. Yeah, I think, you know, I think that's really how I am. I'm not like, I'm not the, I was never the biggest Republican or the biggest Democrat. I feel like I was always, I mean, I guess I voted Democrat, had voted Democrat most of my life, you know, but I want there to be more parties than there are.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
You know, I want, I just want things to be real or I just want to know what's really going on. I just don't like being like taken advantage of. That's the thing I don't like. And so, yeah, I think that's my biggest curiosity, you know, usually is, Um, it's trying to think, trying to get things to be fair. Um, and yeah, just have a voice if I'm right or wrong.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
You know, I tried, you know, I tried to speak up for what I felt like was, seemed like try to be the best, you know, or whatever I thought was the best. But then sometimes you're also so deceived. You don't know. And that's one thing that's kind of fascinating about life. And that's one thing that I think does get me up these days. It's like,
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
What a tricky fucking little Game of Thrones we're in, right? And everybody should feel that way. And you get up and you see where are they tricking you? Who's tricking me? Who's fucking me? Who am I fucking? You know what I'm saying? And it's crazy.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
That's a dirty fucking Halloween. And your life is at stake, and that's what does put some that's what fucking put something on the line, you know? Yeah. And that is something that's kind of inspiring, man. Yeah. And yeah. And if you don't speak up and you don't try to say like, yeah, it just like, that's what you got to do, man. Use your fucking voice. You know what I'm saying? Use your voice.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
Um, is there anything that you would like to talk about, Dave? You have a tour coming up or anything like that?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
Ooh, wow. That should be fun. Maybe Nick Swartzen will be down there at the bar. He spent a year in Key West during COVID at the fucking... Is that true? Yeah, dude, he went. This is alleged. And I love Nick. And he came here and told the story. I think he spent a million dollars at a hotel there.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
I heard that you ran up a bill at the hotel there that was like astronomical.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
If you tipped, did you tip? I always tip. What do you think it was? When you say a lot of money, how much was it?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
But then also, man, it's so like – spike. That's nice. He's like, you know what? Fuck it. The world might be ending. I might have like lung AIDS or whatever the kid, you know, whatever they were calling COVID. And I'm going to go sit. I'm going to have a margarita and listen to some Jimmy Buffett.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
Yeah. Yeah. Montana is great. There's a great place to eat there. Can you look up the farm in Bozeman, Montana? I think that's what it's called.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
Yeah, New Orleans is a one-of-a-kind type place to do comedy. Oh, there's the crew right there. Attell, Dylan, Bobby Kelly. Who all is in there? Is that Bert in the back? Mark? Yeah, that is Bert, Mark. Lewis Jay. Look at him. Lewis Jay with eyeliner on. I know. God, that's hot. There's Christine, right? No, what is her? Christine.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
Oh, I've seen her before. I was just there two days ago, yesterday. That's a fun room. It is great, man. Austin, dude, it's really... I'm like, man, you can do so much standup there. It's like the new Hollywood it feels. It's like the new comedy. It really feels, this is the time I really felt it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
Oh, I can imagine that. Say if I'm going to my church or my religious place, my place of worship. Oh, yeah. And there's a guy sitting over there. And a foreign military. Right. Foreign group loudly drinking out of a juice box or something and pouring a loud candy in his hand because he doesn't give a fuck. Yeah. He doesn't even probably recognize that my religion even exists. He may not.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
Part of that's getting older, too. Yeah, it is. Did I know since you said you're Jewish, did I offend you with anything I said? No. OK.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
Yeah. Sometimes some stuff is hard to talk about. I think I'm trying to do a better job this year of like being brave about trying to talk about some things, even if it feels kind of scary. Yeah. Sometimes I have a tough time like – like saying, hey, slow this down so I can make sure I know what I'm thinking too.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
Like it's been a – learning to be in conversations has been – it's harder than you think I think sometimes.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
Yeah, I'm going to try to focus on that a little bit more or unfocus on it a little bit. Just leave a little bit more room for things. What was one other thing I was going to say? Yeah. I love the way you're able to think and share. You always feel to me like you are being genuine to what you believe. That's something that I think is important because I think that people can know that that's true.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
Whether you're right or wrong about stuff, you feel like, well, this is how I feel and this is what I think. I just appreciate it. I feel like we're in a special time where people are trying to figure stuff out.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
Yeah. Yeah, I'm trying. Yeah, I'm trying. Yeah. And a lot of it's learning and it's just interesting, man. We're lucky to be able to be alive and think out loud and grateful to anybody that listened. And you got Skank Fest in New Orleans later this year. You have ComicDaveSmith.com. ComicDaveSmith.com.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
Yep. And Dave, thank you so much, man. And best of luck this year with comedy and everything, man. And I might see you at the inauguration, bro. Hell yeah, dude. All right, man. Have a good one, brother. Thanks for having me. Bye.
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E555 Dave Smith
He may or may not. But either way, that's going to make me.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
It was going on since – Yeah, we had some guys come on and talk about – Israel and Palestine, just like the histories of both of them. You know, it was cool. We had Rabbi Wolpe come on and we had Basim Yusuf come on. And just to give like the two different kind of different sides and take us through some of the different perspectives of history.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
But yes, so this was the message right here that Osama had written, right? Yeah. And so those were some of his big issues. Yes, looks like it here. I can't – OK, criticism of American military bases in the Middle East, condemnation of U.S. support for Israel, accusation of U.S. exploitation of the region.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
We recorded this on Monday, January 13th, which is why there was no talk of the ceasefire. Just wanted to make that note. I'm really grateful for his time and his insight. And today's guest is comedian Dave Smith. And I mean that's most of my goal each day is to just babysit myself a lot of it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
I mean, depending on what perspective you look up, Robin hood is a tale of a terrorist. It depends on what perspective you look at it through.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
When you look back to American history, I mean, what we did to the Native Americans, sure, they had huge beef amongst each other, but they were also... blatantly lied to and taken advantage of countless times by other people that had come in, you know, by white settlers that had come in or, um, and by the Spanish as well.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
You know, a lot of times it all gets put onto, uh, honkies or whatever, but it was also darker honkies, the Spanish, you know, just so you know, we don't even consider them white. Okay. So it was really your beef is with each other. But, um, but let's, so let's, let's tie this back into the Tik TOK. Okay. So, um,
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
You're saying that it's because – and this – I believe that, yeah, one of the main reasons TikTok has been banned is – or is there's a threat of the ban or the force of the sale is because they don't want it to be in the hands of a place where they can't have the other side of the story come out, whether it be about Palestine or about anything. Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
We're our worst enemy a lot of the same time because it's like we want certain things, but we're not willing to let go of any comforts or any – or really battle some of our addictive natures. I think some of that too is just a side effect of capitalism and a side effect of comfort over time and a side effect of like kind of deterioration of our society.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
Like even if you look at like – I was reading this the other day about pornography. Like a lot of the – the videos in private, someone will be like dad's daughter. Dad's when you really think about the fact that that's how they're, you know what I'm saying? It's like, there's somebody has a dark goal to tear down like the little things like family, things that matter. You know what I'm saying?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
That guy sounds like he was building a – like he was literally using you to build a case for a future indictment he was going to face. But no, it's kind of – He came out with it really quickly too. Like it was – He's like, we just signed, signed this petition right here.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
Um, but let me, I'm trying to tell this. What were we talking about in my mind? Just like tick tock. And then, but tick tock. Yeah. Like, um, yeah, we're also part of the, our own product. It's like, we just keep creating this stuff, but, um, or just ridiculousness.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
We, and we get addicted to the ridiculousness, but also some of that's part of the freedom of just being in a place where you can make whatever you want. Um,
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
and you have that like freedom of creation kind of to an extent or freedom of your own creativity some places you can't even really be creative in because it's not um it's not not allowed but the expressions of certain creativities aren't um yeah i don't buy the chinese i don't i don't know if i buy the chinese thing or not because to me it's like aren't all these apps like
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
I think I would like to get to that point, get a spouse or get a spouse or something. Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
Yeah, and you could ask a regular – I'm a pretty regular guy, I think. And I don't mean that in like a braggy way. I just feel like I try to be smarter sometimes. It's hard for me. And then I realize I just have to try my best at where I'm at. And I thought immediately Russia. I was like they're running out of steam. They have an old dude. A lot of people go over there for perverted stuff.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
It's like I could certainly see a lot of our leaders passing through there. And you know what I'm saying? We'll do a few favors for Russia because they don't want some videos getting released. But I don't think that this... They don't seem like they're on the cusp of... of like holding us at bay for something. You know, I just immediately, they didn't pass the smell test to me.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
Except they just beat you into it over and over again with the beliefs. Oh, I just got a notification from MoonPay that Bitcoin is trading at near $100,000. Well now, that's crazy. It's just off its all-time high of $108,000 in December. If you're interested in Bitcoin or crypto, then you need to download the MoonPay app. That's it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
caretaker or even get in a hospice dude i have some friends you just want but not dying but just have hospice that's a new thing a lot of guys um yeah see if you bring that up if you bring young men going to live um my buddy caleb presley you know he is he works with barstool long hair yeah i think so he does the sunday conversation okay he uh lives in a senior retirement home How old is he?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
MoonPay is like your friendly neighborhood convenience store if all it sold was crypto and it was open 24 hours a day. When you buy crypto with the MoonPay app, you can use any of your favorite payment methods like Apple Pay, Venmo, PayPal, credit, and debit. They took out the hassle of buying crypto and made it as easy as buying a bacon, egg and cheese sandwich. Thank you, MoonPay.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
In the last week, people in over 100 countries have bought Bitcoin using MoonPay. If you want to be one of them, visit MoonPay.com slash T-H-E-O to download their app on iPhone or Android and create a free account. When you create a MoonPay account, you can also use it to buy crypto on other popular wallets and trading apps like Phantom, Exodus, MetaMask, and Trust Wallet.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
That's MoonPay.com slash T-H-E-O or just search MoonPay in the App Store. And I'm not giving you investment advice. I don't have that. But I am telling you that if you want to go with crypto, MoonPay is the way. You're a startup founder. That's what you are. You've founded a startup, and now you've got to find product market fit. That's right. That's probably your number one priority.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
Now, maybe you have a new software. You have a new type of drone that takes family photos from outer space. Or maybe you developed a new shoe and it purifies water and sorts coins while you walk. I don't know. But finding product market fit is probably your number one priority. But to land bigger customers, you also need security compliance. That's where Vanta comes in.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
Vanta is the all-in-one compliance solution, helping startups like yours get audit ready and build a strong security foundation quickly and painlessly. How? Well, Vanta automates the manual security tasks that slow you down, helping you streamline your audit. Join over 9,000 companies, including many Y Combinator and Techstars startups who trust Vanta.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
Rocket Money is a personal finance app that helps you find and cancel your unwanted subscriptions, monitors your spending, and helps lower your bills so you can grow your savings. Rocket Money has over 5 million users and has saved a total of 500 million in canceled subscriptions, saving members up to $740 a year when using all of the app's premium features. Wow.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
Simplify compliance and get $1,000 off at vanta.com slash T-H-E-O. That's V-A-N-T-A dot com slash Theo for $1,000 off. And the thing – and that's where I think – that's really where I think the media started to go really lose its grip on people and on control. And so that's why I really worry a lot like with this TikTok ban.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
I'm like, well, because if news is getting out there, right, about all types of things, it could be like there was also a lot of Barbara O'Neill. Did you see those clips? She's a medicine woman. an Australian medicine woman, but there was a lot of like natural remedy stuff that started to just be put out there. Like, I don't know if it was valid or not, but it was like, you would see a ton of it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
Like, like, so basically opposition to all these medicines, all these like prescriptions you need. Like, so I could see certainly how no, but like the powers that be, if they exist, don't want a lot of this type of information out there. Oh yeah. And especially with Palestine, you know, I don't think, You know, I don't understand, you know, I don't understand what's going on over there.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
He got loopholed in, I think, 33, 34. That's getting an early start. Loves it. Tanning, listening to him argue, stuff like that. It's down in Florida. So it's a, yeah, he gets all of that. Three meals a day or like two and a half meals. I'm not sure what they're doing.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
But you're not letting the news out. That's the thing, right? You're not letting people get a fair take of what could potentially be going on there, right? You're not letting it – you're doing everything you can to stop that.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
Oh, well, I think it's like I'm not an anti-Israel guy. I am a – but that guy seems – it just seems he gives me this vibe that it's evil, right? And it's not something I'm making in my head. It's something that starts inside of me. It's not like I'm –
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
Because I know it because I knew it when I went to Cuba when I was in college and I would see people that would come up to the windows and they weren't allowed to share what they – they had to whisper if they wanted to tell you something, right? Or when we went to the libraries there and they only had books that started at Fidel. Their history books started at fucking Fidel. Yeah, that's crazy.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
So if you're a kid and you wanted to – you couldn't – you didn't exist. Your grandparents didn't even – whoever – your essence didn't exist, you know? So – And they had – I read a quote somewhere that the Netanyahu guy, that his father said that – oh, he didn't like Arabs, right? And he didn't like the essence of it. of Arabs. And that to me was just like a thing.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
Like that's the same type of shit. It seemed like that Hitler would have said, like, I don't like whatever the, the, the granule, the grain, I don't like this, the, the Adam of this person. I don't know, man, maybe. And I don't know. No, it's listen. I mean, it's a, there's, you know, my, it just makes me say, and the biggest thing, it just breaks my heart.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
Like, and so I know when that kind of shit's happening, where my feel, it's like,
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
that's where it comes from it's like you know it just like i don't know i've always had a barometer for like the underdog i think you know and maybe that's all maybe some of it's that too you know i don't know everything i don't know a ton of history you know but but yeah some of that shit it just fucking hurts when you think about how many children have been killed how many kids have been killed over there estimation
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
Gaza. If you tell the kid, like, where are we going to go? You know what I'm saying? If you're like, we're going to go to Yemen or Gaza, they're going to go there.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
Conservative figures show that more than 6,000 women and 11,000 children were killed in Gaza by the Israeli military over the last 12 months.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
It seems like it to me, yeah. For today – like as of right now, I think the estimates are much higher. Dude, here's the toughest part. A lot of my Jewish friends are heartbroken by this, man. And they'll come to me and we'll be talking about it because – And they're just like, it's just sick that this is the guy who's representing us, you know, and that this is the choice.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
I don't understand why, but I guess if you live in Israel, then you feel like, well, these people are going to kill us. And so you don't have, you have to, you have no choice but to support your, governor.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
Some guy's just fucking... Like, look at this chump. Some guy just zoned out.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
Yeah, well, that's the crazy thing. And the toughest part is the people are the ones who have to go and shed the blood. The people are the ones who have to have the blood shed based on what their leaders, who they elect and they would never elect them and tell them to do that, then choose to do.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
That's what I'm just like, how does this – but then that's how things – that's just being alive, I guess, in human sometimes, as sad as that is. Or that's just how humanity has gone for a long time and society has gone and war has gone. But yeah, you have to think how many Iraqi people who –
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
had nothing to do with 9-11, if they had nothing to do with it, were affected by our military presence over there and are just waiting in the wings.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
Some dude just hopped up on ED pills, you know? That's got to be the scary thing, I think, when you get to a certain age is risking going for the erection because of the blood, just moving all the blood to one, you know. Oh, yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
Is there something that I guess that, yeah, I guess I don't understand why we would support it while they're doing that murdering. Yeah. Well, and then even if you, unless there's something I don't understand, like, that's also the thing that's like, Are they just our best friend from a long time and that's just what it is?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
I worry that I just also don't understand the history of much as why there is so much support there. Well, it's been – But you have to have a support in the Middle East. You have to have like a friend in there.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
Yeah, the Carter Doctrine was a policy proclaimed by President of the United States Jimmy Carter in his State of the Union address on January 23rd, 1980. which stated the United States would use military force if necessary to defend its national interests in the Persian Gulf.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
So there's a ton of business interests over there, and there's a ton of like peacekeeping or what we believe is peacekeeping over there.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
So this was saying that if the Soviets intervene, then we're going to come and defend Iran.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
It just shows you how much we've had like once you become this thing that's this entity that's trying to control everything, how many – it's hard to keep – they say like it's hard to keep track of the lies or whatever. That's not really it, but it's hard to – it just seems like hard to manage.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
It's hard to be an air traffic controller for the world, you know, especially when the planes have different religions and ideas and histories and beliefs and, um,
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
you know uh hopes you know it's that's oh it's it's insane i mean the job yeah i mean imagine it's just impossible it's impossible that's what i'm saying it seems impossible and especially at a time when our own country is struggling so much and i don't know may i hope yeah i don't mean to be like mean to israel i just don't understand i you know i love my jewish friends i don't understand that shit though i don't understand um why uh
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
why they're doing that over there. And then I think it falls in the power of the wealthier person to figure it out. Well, that's right.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
That's obviously you need that side. Don't push me. Don't push another bullying video at me. Yeah. Unless that's going to be the first one that you fucking recite. Right. Exactly. That's the thing. And that's the shit I don't understand sometimes. Yeah, I don't know. I don't understand how we would have media that would be like so anti-bullying and then this fucking bullying is going on.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
And it's like, well, what kind of – who's believing you? Or what are we doing? I don't know. And also I don't fucking know, dude. And I'm like nine days up in nicotine. Oh, are you really? Yeah. You gave up nicotine? Yeah. Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
I was smoked. I was I was vaping. OK, I was vaping. It's sad to say it as an adult to like slipping off to slurping on.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
But yeah, but if you go on your porch now and light a pipe, somebody will shoot you with a fucking musket.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
And they'll just fucking pull right up and fucking pop one in you. But so do you believe that the TikTok ban, what do you really believe? Or do you think we're still figuring it out? Do you think that our elected officials will let it stay around? Trump seems like he's wishy-washy on it. He does, yes.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
As the deadline for a potential TikTok ban in the U.S. approaches billionaire and former Los Angeles Dodgers owner. Oh, hell yeah. Frank McCourt's Project Liberty confirmed making a formal offer to ByteDance, a platform's Chinese parent company, to buy the social media platform. giants, American assets.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
And he was going to do it with, in conjunction with one of the guys from, um, um, sharks, good evening, sharks, whatever that show is shark dance or whatever. Shark boy. No, there's a woman, shark tank, shark tank. There you go. Shark tank. Who was it? Danny or something from shark tank. One of them billionaires was gonna throw in, um, Kevin O'Leary. So him and Kevin O'Leary, I believed, uh,
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
I believe, don't quote me on that, was supposed to be. The videos are short on TikTok, right? Isn't that the idea? Some of them now can be longer. Some of them can be, I think 90 seconds is the length on Instagram. TikTok can be a couple minutes now.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
It is kind of true. TikTok videos can range from three seconds to 60 minutes long, depending on how you film or upload the video. But this also could have been from chat GBT. I don't know where from AI this fact. And so who knows if they're harboring that from years ago and today videos or images and TikTok stories can go up to 15 seconds long with a display after 24 hours.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
Yeah. Yeah, that's interesting, man. That's certainly, yeah. Yeah, I think, yeah, at least you're kind of out there meeting people. There's definitely everything. There's like people shooting each other. There's Mexican stuff. There's dancing. There's, you know... Uh, bacchanalia. There's people getting their nails done. Sometimes you pop into a live. You don't even know what's going on.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
You're just in some kids live and he's eating a burger. There's some kid eating. Look at this fucking burger. There's some kid like in a broth who lives like the under a brothel or something in Scotland. And somebody gave him a big burger and he just made this video. He's like, look at this burger. And it's like eight parties, eight parties stocked up boys. Yeah. And it fucking went crazy, right?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
And that kid could be the next governor of Glasgow, right? But it's like, that's the thing. I think because people also can maybe over time, maybe they get to know you. I don't know what it is. But yeah, I think it's fascinating, man. And TikTok, it does pull more of my information. And that's the only thing. I just want it to be fair. That's my thing. I just want it to be fair.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
Don't say that this truth can't come out if this truth can't come out. Like, just make it fair. You know what I'm saying? Yeah. If America isn't a country that's American and it's a country that's owned by other countries, tell me that. If that's the case, but just let me live through the truth.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
And I never liked fucking rich people anyway, bro. Facts, dude. I fucking hated them. I didn't hate them, but I didn't fucking like them. Yeah. You know? I don't, yeah, I just, I don't know. And maybe, yeah, and I have money now and that's true, but I'll never fucking really have money, motherfucker. You know what I'm saying? Not like deep inside of me. You know what I'm saying?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
Like that part of me will never have any fucking money, bro.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
Oh, deep inside, dog. I'm a real fucking wigger, son. You feel me? What else? Oh, but Kevin O'Leary, I think I wanted to get that right. It was $250 million they offered to an investor and Shark Tank star. Kevin O'Leary is willing to pay up to $20 billion for TikTok, calling it a legacy opportunity. I think that that is a steal. Well, Elon bought Twitter for $44 billion, I think, right?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
But he's getting his use out of it. I mean, he doesn't sleep. He doesn't seem to be enjoying himself on there. Is he addicted to Twitter, do you think? He tweets a lot. How many tweets does he have right now? Let's see how many tweets he has. And he tweets more than we think, I think, Dave.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
It used to show you right up at the top. 66.5 thousand posts right under his name at the top.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
Um, you're Jewish. You're you're. Yeah. Okay. I am. You are. And so, um, are you Israeli too? Is that the same thing? No, no, no, no. Israel's the nation. I have nothing to do with that. Okay. But are, but some are some Jew, but someone's Jewish. They're just, they're just means that they have family that's from Israel originally. No, not even necessarily.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
Well, it says January 2012, so I guess that's... And how long has Elon been on? Well, I guess he was on before, but when did he start really getting in?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
Doge coin. Doge. Doge. Vivek. Vivek. Boss. Yeah, it's very kind of archipelagian sometimes or something, Barbadian, yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
You all know I like to keep things cool, even in the winter. And nothing is cooler than a blue cube cold plunge. I'm fortunate enough to have one at home. And let me tell you, it's like baptizing your soul, baby. Get in that little crispy bucket, baby. It gets rid of them demons we all have and makes you feel great for seven or eight hours afterwards. It's good.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
My buddy Thomas Schiffer, the genius behind Blue Cube, and I go way back, and he just launched a presale for their new stand-up cold plunges. Wow. These things are the Cadillacs of cold plunge therapy. American-made, full immersion, weatherproof frames, and built like a Sherman tank. I'll say this. They are built well.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
And because you're listening to me, you can get a sweet discount when you mention my name. That's right. Just tell them Theo sent you and they'll knock a good bit off the price. So if you're ready to boost your metabolism, eliminate inflation and blast away your anxiety, give them a call. Head over to their website, bluecubebaths.com and dive into the details.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
Opt in on their website or give them a call. I am grateful for the one that I have and I feel honestly thankful to be able to have one. I know they're not in everybody's price range and that's understandable. But at the same time, I want to support my friend and his amazing company. Yeah, what's censorship? What do you think censorship looks like right now? Do you think it's changing?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
But you can be anti Netanyahu and not. And that's you can I can have that belief if I want. Right. If I don't like his practices, of course.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
It started becoming the boy that cried wolf because they would say that for everything. And then it would be like, well, what do you – you're not even – You're you're doing this. Yeah. You're saying this. This isn't true. Right. Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
Yeah. Yeah. Let's talk about Zuckerberg a little bit because he just had that kind of about face sort of on – and Facebook. They just had that kind of about face on Rogan where he was talking about – where's that clip? That clip, yeah, right here where he kind of says the Biden administration would call Meta to scream and curse at them to censor true information on their platforms.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
This is what Zuckerberg said, right? Play it real quick, a little bit of it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
What do you think about this? To me, I just don't know if I – I don't – because Facebook didn't do the best job of – You know, they had issues over the years with the Hunter Biden thing, right? With Russia stuff where they wouldn't let people say this is bullshit. Like they really chose to decide what was misinformation. So it just seems weird that suddenly people are calling and screaming.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
I love like the simple facts. And you're like, is this... It seemed like now you're trying to seem like... like that wasn't happening the whole time and you weren't listening to it before type of vibe.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
It seemed like he's just back here trying to slurp back on humanity. Now, That's a slurp job.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
And to be your basically become communication in the universe. Like you are like if everybody had to talk in like a hallway, you're the hallway, you know, you are.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
Cancel your unwanted subscriptions and reach your financial goals faster with Rocket Money. Go to RocketMoney.com slash T-H-E-O. That's RocketMoney.com slash Theo. RocketMoney.com slash T-H-E-O. We have added a second show in Nashville, baby, on May 3rd. It's an early show, 4 p.m. at the Bridgestone Arena. And I can't even believe that. And thank you guys so much for all the love and support.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
You're like, eh, not exactly. It almost seems sometimes the way he, he almost seems like a doll. Does he a little bit when you're – and I don't mean it in a bad way. I just mean it in an interesting way. I'm fascinated by the guy. I mean the guy – I can't imagine what his life is like or what he's like as a person or what it's like to talk with him. I would love to have that opportunity.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
pressure if he feels it um you know they had that one moment where like they had all those families that had people had been uh solicited or whatever young people had been caught by traffickers or like um approached by traffickers or uh solicitation sexual can you bring that up it was um it was zuckerberg before congress watch the moment that meta ceo mark zuckerberg apologized to the families of victims during a hearing on online child safety that's what it was
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
Wow. Okay, that's good. I think it just seems like a robot doing it. That wasn't great. That wasn't a great moat. That's why I wondered, does he feel? It seems like he doesn't have a lot of feel in him.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
Okay, so somebody who supports the country Israel is Zionist. And sometimes I see black Zionists. Is that like Zionism just with a backbeat or whatever? You know what I'm talking about? Yes. And they're like, we're the reals. And I'm like, I don't know what is going on.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
Yeah, that's a great point. They shouldn't have put him on the spot to do it right there because that wasn't really helpful. Because they're not looking for a sincere apology.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
See, I should be sure of myself. I would rather be exposed to the inconveniences attending too much, attending too much liberty than those attending too small a degree of it. Yeah, I agree. Why not err on that side of it? Yeah, Facebook has had issues. I mean, remember when they had There was a thing where they had – there was like these canyons or something. See if you can look that up.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
They were looking up information. They were using people in Africa to look up – they were the fact checkers or whatever, and I think it was a lawsuit. Facebook content moderators in Kenya call the work torture. Their lawsuit may ripple worldwide. I'm not even sure what happened with this. When was this? Oh, it's 2023. Okay. On the verge of tears, Nathan Nkunzimana recalled,
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
I admire you for trying. Oh, thank you. Yeah. On the verge of tears, Nathan Nkunzimana recalled watching a video of a child being molested and another of a woman being killed. Eight hours a day, his job as a content moderator for a Facebook contract required him to look at horrors so the world wouldn't have to. Now, Nkunzimana is among nearly 200 former employees in Kenya who are suing Facebook.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
It's so wild. Let me see. The group was employed at the social media giant's outsourced hub for content moderation in Kenya's capital of Nairobi, where workers screen posts, videos, messages, and other content from users across Africa, removing any illegal or harmful material that breaches its community standards and terms of service. Can you even imagine having to moderate the stuff in Africa?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
The moderator from several. And that was I shouldn't. That wasn't a fun time to joke. I'm sorry. That wasn't funny. And I love Kenya. I've been to Mombasa. I love Puerto Rico. Puerto Rico, I love it, I've been there. Oh no, do not touch that girl.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
The moderators from several African countries are seeking $1.6 billion compensation fund. Oh, that's a lot of money. After alleging poor working conditions, including insufficient mental health support and low pay. Wow. I wonder what happened to that lawsuit. If you find out that something happened, let me know. But they've had issues over there. And I'll say this. Well, that's not really it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
But I can't imagine having to be. actual person doing that work, but that's what it comes down to. You're basically having to moderate the entire world of communication. You've taken on that responsibility, you know?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
Yeah. Well, it's just interesting. At what point do you think that there could be a revolution in America? Because if people don't trust the FBI now, they don't trust the CIA now, you're not sure that your FBI isn't out to get your own – It's like, what is even, like...
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
It's like with the real slim savings, please stand up, you know? Is that an okay Jewish joke to make or not? I mean, as far as I'm concerned, it was good. Just, yeah, sorry. I thought that was pretty good.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
Not even the people that believed you believe you. That's what's crazy is watching people that were like devout believers come on over and be like, I just don't believe these people.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
Oh, it's crazy. There hasn't been – there's not a lot of people where I'm from who even get to ask questions a lot of times. No, I don't think you're – There's not a lot of people where I'm from who ever even get to raise their hand in front of a president and ask a question about something that means something to them.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
A lot of times, yeah, you just get pigeonholed into being some type of way, and so then – As a person, as part of even just a group, you start to feel like, well, I don't even fucking exist. You know what I'm saying? And I think that's part of how I always felt my whole life. Nobody gives a fuck about a poor, off, white kid. You know what I'm saying? That's the last fucking group. And so...
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
Yeah, I think... I don't know. I don't know what I'm saying, man. I think it's a really great point. I mean, if you think about it, like, at least my whole life, right? Well, finally, we made our own voices because you don't even see that I am a voice. You don't even think I have a fucking voice. And so, finally...
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
I'll, you don't think, and you also, you don't think I'll work hard enough to fucking put my voice out there.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
Yeah, because that's a new thing I've been seeing. I would see it, and then sometimes I wouldn't see it. And now when I'm performing in different cities, you'll see a group of black Zionists, and they're trying to get you into something, and I can't tell what it is. But yeah, and then you hear a lot of different terms. So yeah, I was just curious about that. Dave Smith, thanks for joining, man.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
Yeah, I think in media, in entertainment, in comedy, and yeah. So Trump has his new cabinet picks, right?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
What do you feel, like who are some of your favorites? Who are some you're kind of on the fence about? Doug Collins got fucking picked? The coach? The basketball coach?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
I remember that, dude. That's a great point. That's never really talked about, is it? But what about some of his cabinet picks? Who do you like? Where are you at with some of that?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
Jay Bhattacharya, bring him up. He sounds like he's from Madras, New Jersey, dude. Bring him up, Jay Bhattacharya. Let's get a little gander at him. I just want to get a peek at him. I haven't seen his face before. Bhattacharya. Oh, yeah. I like this guy, huh?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
Absolutely. You are a comedian and a... I want to say like a politico. Is that fair to say kind of, or you're like somebody with a point of view.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
Do you know who that is? Marty. I'm not sure. Marty Macari. Can you look him up? Marty Macari for FDA commissioner. Oh, yeah. I don't know. I don't know enough about this guy. He has a great book called The Price We Pay. Bring up one of his books. I want to talk with this guy. It's about the insurance, the whole – the scam, what broke American healthcare. There's another great book he has too.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
Dude, one of his books, he has this thing like where they were going to black churches, OK? He's a surgeon, right? Let me see. Martin Andel McCarty is a British-American surgeon, professor, author, and medical commentator.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
Where they were going to – they were convincing – giving people scans at their churches, showing them that they needed like their blood vessels dilated or shunts put in their legs. And it was just – and doctors were making a ton of money through Medicaid. It was just this big scam.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
And a lot of the doctors were funding the groups that would go, and they would do it at black churches and black religious get-togethers. And they'd have tables set up, and they were just using these people, basically sending them through as just like a fucking – as a – varicose vein mill, you know, unreal.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
Yeah. But he, he talks about that. He talks about a lot of neat stuff. Oh, that's another one. Blind spots. When medicine, that's what I've been reading. When medicine goes wrong, that's one that I've been reading, but he seems like an interesting guy, but he got put in. That's what I'm excited about. Um, Gabbard, you said, who else is in there?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
And you're very funny, man. Well, thank you. And you are a libertarian. Is that right? Yes. Okay. And this is awesome, man, because so much of my audience and me really is just like I don't know what a lot of the terminology is, right? Like even asking you about Zionists, like you hear it, but you're like, what is it, right? What does libertarian mean?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
Let me see. Let's finish this one, though. Gabbard 43 was born in the U.S. territory of American Samoa, raised in Hawaii, and spent a year of her childhood in the Philippines. Yeah, she's definitely – I love the way that she talks. I love how just her own – she always seems to have her very own voice. But – When you get in, like, who compromised? What did they use to compromise, you think?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
That's what I always wonder. I mean, I think, I don't know.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
Well, that's, they don't, they for sure don't. I mean, I think, I think, and, and. Unless they come and kill all the podcasters and stuff. Do you think that they could do that? Have you ever worried about your own safety?
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E555 Dave Smith
I'm just amazed that none of them ever come on and said, hey, you know what? I want to apologize for wasting your fucking time. That's what I want to do. I want to apologize that we didn't care enough to even really look into things truly. and that we wasted your time. That would be like a real thing to do, right?
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E555 Dave Smith
Like I just, yeah, it's like, that's why sometimes you're like, are the people running this thing, do they have any, human feelings, because that's why I don't see a lot. It's like, you would think if you really cared about your customer base at all, right? You would go and say, hey, I'm sorry, I got this wrong. This was wrong.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
Or we didn't know it was wrong, but we didn't even try to do our best practices. We got caught up. Something
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
starving I mean I'm not trying to like overstate it like there's mass starvation but I mean I should say surviving a hurricane or fires or whatever oh I agree I think I was thinking today it was like hey well Ukraine Zelensky can you give us back some of our money so we can pay our teachers better so we can feed people who are starving in our own country so we can get homeless people off the streets so we can help
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
cure some of our mental health so we can help repair some of this fire damage for people that were uninsured or help the displaced people that are over here. Just countless things. I mean, I could go on and on, but it's like, Yeah, it just feels like we're just being money laundered a lot of times.
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E555 Dave Smith
Well, even just – and to like – And I know those people have problems, but it's like – the perfect example for me was that Karen Bass lady from – with the LA Fires, right? I'd never heard of her before, and she seems like a nice woman. I bet she's a great woman. But she was in Ghana – unless she was on vacation. She was in Ghana, Africa while this was happening. And if she was on vacation, then –
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E555 Dave Smith
do she should be able to do whatever she wants and she should be able to do whatever she wants anyway. Um, just in Los Angeles, mayor freezes up. This is exactly how people should be treated. Do you owe citizens for being absent while their homes are burning? You regret cutting the fire department budget. Um, do you think you should have been visiting Ghana while this was unfolding back home?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
But can you look up was she in Ghana on vacation? That's what I need help on. But she's in Ghana. But it's like, why are you even in Ghana? Like, you're the mayor of a town.
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E555 Dave Smith
But it is, you know... It's hard to point fingers at this point, though. Like, it's like... obviously things were bad. They had their reservoir that was dead empty. That was like, took countless millions of dollars and held millions of gallons of water. Um, just a lot of bet. Just, you know, I don't know. It's heartbreaking. What's happening out there is heartbreaking, but that's the weird part.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
It's like, why is she even, you, you have, we have, how much do the people have to suffer or be struggling in our own country for our own country to be like here? Yeah. And who – how are we electing these people that aren't saying here, America, we're going to help you first? Yeah, it's unbelievable. It's totally outrageous, man. How is that – I just don't understand how it's happening.
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E555 Dave Smith
Post office sucks, dude. I was in the post office like three weeks ago. Right. There's no, there's a home. I want to say, I don't want to say homeless, but pretty homeless guy in there. Right. Yelling faggot over and over again. Right. Just yelling it into the fucking distance or whatever. And dude, I'm second in line. Right. So I'm like, you know, but nobody even came to help him.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
We're in there for seven minutes. I just walked out. I'm like. But that's the U.S.
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E555 Dave Smith
Yeah. Oh, always. Yeah, man. It's wild. And also when you push – when you position yourself as this we will handle it all – You don't let other societies and cultures kind of create their own narrative and wherewithal for themselves in a weird way. Oh, I think that's absolutely right.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
Is pornography causing a problem in your life? Do you find yourself watching porno for longer periods of time and having trouble stopping? Is porn affecting your relationship or dating life? Well, you're certainly not alone. Watching pornography has become so commonplace today and oftentimes men use porn to numb the pain of loneliness, boredom, anxiety, and depression.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
Shame and stigma prevent men from talking about these issues and getting help for them. I want to introduce you to my friend Steve. Steve is the founder of Valor Recovery, a program to help men overcome porn abuse and sexual compulsivity.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
Steve is a long-term sexual recovery member and has personally overcame the emotional and spiritual despair of abusing pornography and has dedicated his life to empowering men to do the same. Steve is an amazing person and he is a close friend of mine. I mean that. Valor Recovery helps men to develop the tools necessary to have a healthier sex life.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
Their coaches are in long-term recovery and will be your partner, mentor, and spiritual guide to transcend these problematic behaviors. To learn more about Valor Recovery, please visit them at www.valorrecoverycoaching.com or email them at admin at valorrecovery. recoverycoaching.com. Thank you.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
Oh, I didn't see that one. Oh, maybe I did. I'm sorry if I did. I've watched a couple of hers. I wake up at about 5.15 and watch TikTok for like 40 minutes every night. Get it while you can. I know. I'm not doing that good. Here's one thing. Yeah, play that Mel Gibson right there. I just love the way he communicates. I have three friends.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
Okay, stop. Now we're getting into Breaking Bad territory. That's the wild part of that, you know?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
Oh, yeah. I would be drinking fucking pool water or whatever happened, you know, whatever it needed. Did what was one thing else that happened the other day? Yeah, we're supposed to start shooting a movie. Me and David Spade wrote a movie and we're supposed to start shooting it last week in LA, but the fires. So now it's just up in the air.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
It's been like kind of bizarre, you know, but the weirdest thing about LA that I'm hearing is like, I'll get a text from a friend or talk to a friend who's crying. Their home is burnt down. Then I'll get a call from a friend who's like, hey, man, do you want me to go over by your place and move your car to my apartment or whatever in case the fire switch went?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
And I'm like, I think I'm okay right now. And I was like, what do you have to do? He's like, I'm going to a couple auditions today. And so it's just such a –
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
And that guy lives right – I mean he's going along the 405, like right where the border of like where the next evacuation – it's just – it's amazing. I remember when I lived there during some of the last fires, you'd be driving the 405 and there would just be fire on both sides. And it almost feels like – It's like that – what's that place in Florida with the adventure park or whatever? Six Flags.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
It almost has this – because you can't believe that it's real. I know what you mean. And you're in Hollywood where shit is – a lot of things are made and manufactured and created. So you're like, well, of course this isn't real.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
Better bring my umbrella with me. Yeah, this is the kind of stuff it was. This is very intense. This must have been 2017 from Andrew Mutz. Wow, that's a wild picture. But this same highway, same spot, Skirball Drive. Keep playing that for a minute. I mean, that's insane. Like, how should you be able to drive this close?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
Hey, Siri, play Spotify. Play Firework by Katy Perry. You know what I'm saying? There's somebody picking up a song and then realizing, oh, maybe not right now. Or some guy smoking. He's like, oh, it's already fucked anyway. It's like, what? Is this really going to be the problem? It's just people are still going to be people. What else was something else that I wanted to talk to you about?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
Oh, some of Trump's picks that you're not excited about.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
Cool, man. Yeah, I – Okay, so that's good information. Thanks. Let's talk about some things that are happening right now. One of the biggest ones right now is TikTok and the sale of it, right? Like there's a big uproar right now. You see a lot of videos on TikTok about what to do if TikTok disappears, where to go. People are like, there's like safe rooms and shit.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
I'm like, I think they'll figure it out, but maybe some people won't. What do you think is behind the TikTok ban? Do you think it's actually going to get banned? Right.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
A Statement of Principles they released on June 3rd, 1997. Yeah, there's –
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
Specifically advocating regime changes through a determined effort to remove Saddam Hussein from power in Iraq. The letter suggested that any strategy aiming at the eradication of terrorism and its sponsors must include a determined effort to remove Hussein, even if no evidence linked Iraq to the September 11th attacks.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
In 1996 – And in a report just before the 2000 election that would bring Bush to power, the group predicted that the shift would come about slowly unless there were some catastrophic and catalyzing event like a new – Pearl Harbor. Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
The peace – and that was like the Oslo Accord. It was to try to get – that was supposed to help with – Palestine, right?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
And I'm honored to be performing here in Nashville. in Nashville. We also have tickets remaining for East Lansing, Michigan, Victoria, BC in the Canada, College Station, Texas, Gigum, Belton, Texas, Oxford, Mississippi, Tuscaloosa, Alabama, Winnipeg in the Canada, and Calgary in the Canada. Get all your tickets at theovon.com slash T-O-U-R.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
Well, we're always looked at then, and certainly I think as the – you start to get looked at as the bad guy, if that's true. You start to get looked at as the bad guy if you invite me to come help you. Or if I have the bullets and you have me come along and fire the gun, even if you give me the orders or whatever, I'm still a murderer. I'm still complicit. Right.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
A clean break, a new strategy for securing the realm is a policy document prepared in 1996 by a study group led by Richard Pearl for Benjamin Netanyahu, then prime minister of Israel. Key points, abandoning the Oslo Accords and the concept of a land for peace, reestablishing the principle of preemption rather than retaliation.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
But now part of you say if this is all true, right? You almost have to give Israel credit as well because they're fucking gangsters. That's another thing. It's like no question.
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E555 Dave Smith
sometimes people are like, you know, you hear people say stuff about, um, you know, uh, um, why we're fun Israel and this and that and why, you know, but then you're also like, well, if like they probably like, they did it. They, if we're still playing by all these old rules of like, um, you know, like game of Thrones style shit and fucking, uh,
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E555 Dave Smith
It's a dog-eat-dog world and occupying land and all that kind of stuff. If you're still playing Risk, right? Yes. But you're convincing everybody that we're not playing that way anymore. But you're still playing that way. It's fucking really gangster.
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E555 Dave Smith
And unsure of what they're – I think – and I don't know if people would want to admit this or talk about it, and it may be anti-American for me to say it. But I think the definition right now of being American is frayed in some ways. But – what they were fighting. I mean, the truth of life, probably closing your eyes at night and be like, well, what was I fighting for? You know?
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E555 Dave Smith
And, and maybe that's messed up. Is that messed up with me to say that? No, I'm just speculating. I don't know. No, I don't think so.
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E555 Dave Smith
And also, it's not. And what were we even doing there? And when you find out that a lot of the people were Saudi Arabian or something and we didn't even deal with it, it's like, what was going on? Oh, I can't even imagine.
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E555 Dave Smith
Well, remember they had those videos of them training on like jungle gyms and stuff. Remember those videos? Oh, yeah. Well, I think that was like Al Qaeda or something like that.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
What did I just do? Yeah. We beat up a weak entity. Yes.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
Damn. Yeah. Who are some Trump picks, some other cabinet picks that you're not sure about, you feel like?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
I've met him a couple times. Former Georgia congressman is up first. Let me see. What do you know about Pete Hegseth, Trump's – Hegseth 44 has developed a close rapport with Trump, a military veteran and popular conservative media personality with a large following of his own. He hosted like the Fox Morning Show for years. Oh, I think I remember who he is now.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
America's white sons and daughters are walking away and who can blame them? I think he's talking about the military. Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
Wow. There's a lot going on, huh? Yes. Do you think that things are going to be different this time? Do you really think that – say there is this deep state, right? Do you think we can really get away from it or is it just a lost cause? And sometimes it's like I almost just wish they – my thing is I just wish they would – I just want to know. I don't like – I don't like not knowing. Just tell me.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
I'll do the game. You know what I'm saying? But tell me what the game is.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
I saw they had some issue with Elon now. I remember maybe a year ago or eight months ago or something. There was something with him. Maybe that was ADL?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
Yeah, and I think – I've always thought like the sand – like it all gets remembered, right? Like I think sometimes it's like are we just – is America still suffering from like what it did to the Native Americans here? And I know that's kind of wild, but they had like the –
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
there was a line that they put, I think it was around the Mississippi called the something frontier, general frontier or something where they're like, we'll probably, it was like just a deal that they'd made with the Native Americans. We promise we will never cross here. This is your land. It will always be your land.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
And then within 30 years, it was like, you know, and it's like, I just feel like the ground remembers. It's like, sometimes it's like, you're just, You can't completely escape sin, I don't think, you know, or wrong. I don't think you can completely escape, but you can feel like you can. And you might in your generation, in your life. But what you're going to leave is something that's not.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
It's in the end, it all has to be even. So I just feel like the ground just keeps the score.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
There's going to be a Dateline episode. Yeah. And people are going to side with her. You know what I'm saying? Yeah. it's all going to cut.
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E555 Dave Smith
Yeah. What do you think about Elon and Vivek? Do you think that that is a – is that really something that's going to have an effect on things? Who do they have to answer to because they're not an actual government entity? Is that correct?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
The kids, people begging for food and stuff like that. A lot of the ICC, when they tried to condemn Netanyahu, that was loose on there. It was real information. Yes, that's right.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
So it's not real, but this I've been saying this for a while. I feel like we've entered this kind of like privatized communism. I call it where, and, and you could call the, and this wouldn't maybe be considered communism, but it's privatized democracy, right? It's like we have, like we don't have the post office anymore.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
We have Amazon, we have email, you know, it's like, it's all been privatized, right? We don't really realize it. There's still, everybody's like the government sucks. It's like, yeah, but the government's a company now. It's some other company that's doing the shit that the government used to do.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
the correct way to look at it but the belief is that we still have this thing of freedom and you still do kind of have democracy in some ways right you could still run for an office you could still vote for someone um but it's it certainly feels things feel more manufactured um Yeah. Yeah.
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E555 Dave Smith
Like even like that's why I think very the uber wealthy, they don't care that much about the police and shit because they have their own security. They have they're not fucking worried about that.
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E555 Dave Smith
I agree. Well, it's just amazing how where our country keeps going more and more in debt. In the end, we're going to have a loan to some other country and that country is just going to be like, now you belong to us, right?
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E555 Dave Smith
I mean, they don't care and they don't think about that. It's the same way they didn't think whenever they they don't care. It's the same way they didn't care that every AA room and meeting was going to shut down when they started COVID, you know, or whenever COVID started.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
It's the same way that they didn't care about the pill epidemic that's taken hundreds of thousands, 600,000 lives, and not to mention the ripple effect of those deaths that have broken the hearts of mothers and children and wives and husbands.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
they don't care i just that's what it feels like anymore it feels like they don't fucking care so what can i do now well it's also but then also i also have to remember that throughout history people have lived in this exact same space feeling like their government did not care about them and worse i mean in much worse and much worse you're right so that's why i think other countries like well this is hey welcome yeah you know welcome to what it's really like you know to exist
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E555 Dave Smith
And that company didn't even face any ramifications. They're still allowed to come into America. And this isn't even something that comes up.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
It's not even like until Hollywood is like, oh, we'll make a series about it. So we'll make now we'll make money off of it.
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E555 Dave Smith
Yeah, it's like wearing that Che Guevara shirt, you know? Yeah. You're like, I don't know exactly what he was doing, but, yeah, it seems like a vibe. But then also to hear from, like, a person who was labeled completely as horrible, right, as the enemy, like Osama bin Laden was, and to see some of their thoughts, right? Like, to see how they believe that they came to be the enemy, right?
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E555 Dave Smith
what do they get out of all of it? Or do you think there's just such a level of wealth and control that after generation and generation, you just start to see it as a game almost like that's, that's the part I can't understand because I couldn't understand, like at a certain point you start to do well and then you want to help other people.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
Like whether it's like build a facility for drug people or whatever it is, right? Like get clean water, like do something pot. Like I can't understand getting to the part where you start to see people just as nothing more. than basically ghosts to launder your money through.
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E555 Dave Smith
Yeah. What did Kissinger say? Bring that back up. He said military men are just dumb, stupid animals to be used as pawns in foreign policy. Is that real? Oh, jeez.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
Not taking a side in it, but just, like, it's kind of fascinating that you weren't able to really get some of those – In some places, in some platforms, you might not be able to hear that view.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
Scroll up. Born in Germany, okay. Born in Germany, a Jewish refugee fleeing Nazi persecution. Maybe that's what made him believe that, huh? That probably was what led to his belief, huh?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
Oh, I get it. Look, that's what I'm saying. The sand remember, you know, or the it all remember there's you can't. It's all remembered. The big brain of time, it holds it all. Whatever it is, the soul of time, it holds it all. And it's interesting. It's fascinating. It's painful. It's life.
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E555 Dave Smith
It's all of it. I think it's just like – I don't know. Some of it makes you fucking sad and some of it like – Yeah, maybe it's easy for me to just sit here and say things from my home that has heat in it. I don't know.
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E555 Dave Smith
Yeah, I think I've always just like – I don't know. I think I just – if I feel like something's the underdog, then I'll – I'd rather err on that side for me. It's like somebody's like, oh, you got mad. Somebody's going to get mad. You fucked up. You chose the underdog. All right. My bad. I just – that's like – I just think that's how I feel. How do we know like – Dave, tell me this.
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E555 Dave Smith
Is there any country where if you live in the country, you have to – you have to like – like, commit to that country. Well, in what sense? Because America just starts to seem like this place where everybody can just commit for their other country if they want to.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
Which almost makes you wonder, do we have just our judgment day coming?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E555 Dave Smith
Well, it's the same thing as like being like I think like a – somebody like Jim Carrey or some type of a celebrity, you put so much of you out there that you are all over, but you don't know who you are anymore. Right.
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E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
What do you mean running with volunteers? You mean to help you? Yes. Okay. And at that point, you're just doing it out of your home? Exactly right. First three years off of your home computer. Yeah. And how big did the email list get? Sorry, Craig.
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E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
Right. So at that point, you're like, if I wanted to keep this going, it's got a, there needs to be some checks and balances and obviously salaries help, help create that.
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E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
He worked at IBM, he worked at Bank of America, but most people know him as the founder of Craigslist, a site that has given so many unique experiences to the world. We're so happy to get to spend time today with Craigslist's own Craig Newmark. And just want to let you know, like, we're just excited you're here and we don't have any, this isn't like a, like a got you podcast.
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E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
Yeah. But also a little bit of barrier to entry, which not in a negative way, because you still everybody needs to hire someone or has the opportunity and maybe they can't afford the ad. But but it provides a little more structure to even just some basic. Yeah, it does provide some structure. Right.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
Okay, so that's when it became an actual company in 1999. Yeah. And at that point, you guys have an office? You guys have...
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
It's hard to be a manager, isn't it? Very hard. Because you don't realize once you start to have employees and stuff, you're like, suddenly I'm a boss. And if you never wanted to be a boss, it's a very precarious situation to be in. I've been there, man. What were some of the things that you noticed you were not good at?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
Okay, so you ended up just being a customer service rep at your own company.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
Wow. So if somebody had a customer service issue, they would contact you on the phone or email?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
Especially nowadays. What were some of the things you saw in there early that helped you to believe in the good and continue to make it grow?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
Which could also be a baby carriage depending on, you know.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
Yeah. I used to live with a guy. I lived with this guy named Kenny for a bit. And he... was a pretty big stoner, right? And I didn't know him, met him on Craigslist, right? I get over there and I ended up living over there and he would stack, he had a couple of cats and stuff. And at night he was kind of like a, I guess kind of an avant-garde, like circusy kind of animal trainer guy.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
But he would stack all the boxes, these empty boxes in the room and he would make the cats play on them. And he'd make me come out of my room to watch the show, you know? So it was crazy, but it was like, It's something I still kind of remember about them. I kind of, I guess it was pretty, I thought it was interesting. But yeah, people use boxes. Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
So at that point, yeah, I guess because Craigslist started to be this place it kind of became everything really fast is what it felt like just as a user. Right.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
It became like a first place where you could get a used air, you know, you could get a blender or an air balloon or a roommate, but then it started to escalate to where there was like, um, you know, people would buy drugs on there, you know, or people you'd see people like, um, I would do it, you know, and you would see people, but they also had code names for the drugs.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
So it made it to be this kind of like, um, it, it had a fun spot to it. You know, you'd be on there. I mean, they had like, I remember beef jerky was a code name. Um, those many bennies they had that brain dander, that baby hay was one of them. Um, I'm trying to think of any other that Pedrito Blanco was a span, but they, you know what it was that dragon, the Negro, they had, um, uh,
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
We're not trying to do anything uncomfortable. You know, obviously you've had a very unique life and we just want to, I think we're curious about it, you know?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
I'm trying to eat that whispering mother. That was kind of a native one that they were. It was peyote whispering mother.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
Wow. So you took that upon yourself. It must have been kind of a tough navigation. Was it tough to navigate that personally because you have this atmosphere that people can kind of— It's just a pathway, right?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
So it's funny because you kind of ended up in this space later on where you're like trying to look at the ethics of like communication, who has rights, how do you protect people, but also give people the freedoms that they deserve under their own life. Is that what you're kind of saying?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
When you think about businesses that are selling through the roof, like ALO or Allbirds or Skims, sure, you think about a great product, a cool brand and brilliant marketing. But an often overlooked secret is actually the businesses behind the business, making selling simple. For millions of businesses, that business is Shopify. Shopify, nobody does it better than them.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
Home of the number one checkout on the planet. and the not-so-secret secret with Shop Pay that boosts conversions up to 50%. Upgrade your business and get the same checkout that Allbirds uses. Sign up for your $1 per month trial period at shopify.com slash Theo, all lowercase. That's shopify.com slash Theo. Just go to shopify.com slash T-H-E-O to upgrade your selling today.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
Shopify.com slash Theo. You know, since the last holiday season, things have changed, certainly. The world has gotten busier and different. Your life has changed. Maybe something you did last year, you don't do anymore. And something you didn't do, now you do. Things evolve. Certainly, we have that with our online store, different items, switching to a new storefront.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
Oh, about anger. Yes. Yeah. Yeah. He's a, yeah. I thought Ryan Martin was really interesting. He's a professor over in green Bay because I think anger is something that's kind of enveloping people a lot these days. You know, I find it a lot in myself and you almost get him. I mean, obviously it's, it's kind of embarrassing. You know, it's a weird feeling. That's like,
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
All those sorts of things come into play. ShipStation helps us achieve our shipping goals. That's right. Whether you're looking for better efficiency during the hectic holiday season or your business has outgrown your old shipping solutions, you need ShipStation to help you scale your business. I love the automation. I love the simplicity.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
I love being able to not only learn it for myself, but instruct a coworker easily. Scale your e-commerce business with the shipping software that delivers. Switch to ShipStation today. Go to ShipStation.com. Use code Theo to sign up for your free 60-day trial. That's ShipStation.com, code T-H-E-O.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
Yeah, we get stopped for things and we have to take certain things down, things that we think are just fair speech. You know, we have to put it all through a filter, you know.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
What is it, Voltaf? When a cybersecurity expert explains that Chinese hackers targeting U.S. critical infrastructure. What is this? Can you tell me a little bit about it? Do you mind, Craig?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
You know, it can lead to a lot of negativity, can lead to, you know, dangerous activities. But it also, I feel you get embarrassed of it, you know, and it kind of just takes you over.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
Right. You have to give back. Yeah. We talk about that on here sometimes. I wonder if there should almost be a law. I mean, you could make it a law, but that at a certain point, people, somebody doesn't need any more money, you know, like because then it becomes you see some people that just have. So it's like, what are you doing? Like.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
You know, it becomes almost this obsessive thing where, I don't know, it seems scary to think that some people have so much money.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
Yeah, it's funny how those young years, they're little things you'll keep. I still remember like certain things that I told someone I would do like 25 years ago. And every day or every couple of days, someone's like, hey, don't forget, you still have to do that little thing. You know, it's funny how like those formative years and things that we hear when we're young.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
can have such an effect on us even as we grow older. I want to talk a little bit more about the actual site. So the company starts growing, right? And in addition to people helping each other get jobs, people were helping each other, people were starting relationships on there. I went on dates off of Craigslist before, you know? Did you yourself ever go? Did you?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
Yeah, that's true. You're like, hey, I'm Craig.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
Oh, wow. So there was a little bit of some empathy there, human empathy.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
Right. Yeah, that's a good point. You just want to kind of be a fly on the wall in some sense. Yeah. Wow. So you started off, said hello in a cafe, and then how long was that? Was your... How long did that kind of dating life go for you guys?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
And that worked out pretty well. That's a pretty suave online move. That's almost the most online way you could ask someone to marry you, I feel like.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
I think when it comes to, yeah, talking with women, it definitely, it's not my, you know, I wouldn't, yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Sometimes it doesn't go away. You kind of start to learn it. I think I've just had the, I have the tough thing of asking a girl out. Like sometimes I'm okay with talk. I'll get good with talking with a woman, but it's just that next part. And we'll just be standing there and we'll be like, well, somebody should ask somebody out or walk away from somebody.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
And then you're just still just standing there.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
Oh, there you are. You actually do have your box.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
Craigslist.org. Yeah, man. When you guys were the first one to do .org, people were like, what is it? People thought it meant Oregon. People didn't even know what, you know, where is it?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
Yeah. And so Miss Connections, do you remember like the first Miss Connection that was ever put up or the first personal that was ever put up?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. This is, you know, what you want, what do you want? You want heavy equipment outside of South Jersey. What do you want? You know, you want biotech out of, you know, in Mendocino, you know, you want legal issues, you know, you want ride shares, you want rodeo interests outside of Fort Worth. It's just, it's all right there. You know? Yeah. You can put it together quick.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
Even a simple, even someone who isn't technologically advanced could go here and And even the terms you have on there, it's like childcare, right? Pets, rants and raves. It's like, it's just, anything you could need is kind of right here. And that means the site is always fast. Oh, because it's not a lot of big background.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
What made you choose Jim Buckmaster? What was it about him when you interviewed him?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
Wow. That's cool. It's also cool to hear you recognize that. Like, yeah, these people are better than I was, you know, to learn where your spaces were best. Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
What was it last night? Just so we can tell our listeners now.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
So that's one of your important causes. Independent journalism, veterans. What is another philanthropic cause you enjoy?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
I have some new tour dates to let you know about. I'll be in East Lansing. I'll be in Toledo, Ohio. Rama, Ontario in the Canada. Pittsburgh, PA. Eugene, Oregon. Kennewick, Washington, Seattle. Washington, Victoria, BC in the Canada. College Station, Texas. Belton, Texas. San Antonio, Durant, Amarillo. Oxford, Mississippi. Howdy, howdy. Fayetteville, Arkansas. Tuscaloosa, Alabama.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
A fundraising event? Well, if you guys ever need a comedian at one, I'd love to come. I can't believe it. I wish I'd have known last night. I would have gone. That would have been awesome.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
And did you start to learn that? Where did that interest come from? Or where did that realization that cybersecurity is going to be such a big thing? Was there a lot of like...
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
attacks on security at craigslist like did that happen well there was always something but we had a good team for that right but do you have to have that like what would say if someone was attacking craigslist this is what i'm asking what would they be trying to get well they would be trying to disrupt service okay they would try to uh
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
one that's figuring out where the enemy is for itself if they could subvert it they would turn our autonomous drone back against us that would make for someone's bad day yeah imagine if they if we sent out a drone and it's supposed to get information send it to uh uh uh artillery unit or a missile that's supposed to fire automatically from the information from that drone and they're able to hack it we could you could literally our army could kill themselves wow
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
Yeah, if somebody hacks your ovens, you don't even think about that. Somebody hacks your ovens, next thing you know, there's 1,100 fires in an area.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
It's even funny, like even with drones, like when I was a kid, you had to do a little bit of peeping Tom and right. If you wanted to look into somebody's window, you had to go over there. I don't know anything about that. Yeah. I'm not saying you do.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
And I, you know, and I'm not saying I do, you know what I'm saying? But I did, you know, but I did. I know. But yeah, somebody here does. And it's me. Well, what I'm saying is this now as a kid, you can use a drone. And that's the laziest thing. We, you had to go risk getting beat up by a woman's husband. Yeah. to look in their window, even if they were just cooking or whatever. Right.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
I'm not getting lewd with it. I'm just saying, you know, but now you can just get a drone and go do it. It's like, just breaks my heart.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
I'm sure. I didn't even think about that. Yeah, because I'm still like just squinting real hard and hoping I'm seeing something.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
You know, it's just getting crazy. You know, Yeah, it just, you don't think about all of those things. You don't think about all the ways that we could be hacked and the immediate effects of it, you know?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
When Craigslist, when you... At what point were there ever... like categories that you wouldn't do? Were there ever?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
So you actually got to decide that or not decide it, or you and your team? Team. Okay.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
Well, I don't even I mean, I think even here and today, the things that you care about are things that sometimes I don't even think to care about in some ways or fears that I don't think that, you know, you don't even think that, oh, somebody has to. We need to have a person needs to donate to this because maybe our country isn't worried about it enough yet.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
You know, it's you know, so I think it sounds like you're doing a good job. When you, did your company, because I'm trying to think like, so guns was a thing. Did you guys end up selling them on there or no? No, he said no guns.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
They're off. So drugs were off, but people would try to skirt around that. But even then, some of that was sometimes also, now, were there ever caught, like, Could the cops use your site as well if they wanted to, like as decoy type of stuff?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
They built a good structure over there. Yeah. Well, it's funny because you guys, there was, yeah, it's just like, it's such a part of history. You know, it's such a, I mean, I went on dates from it. I remember I met a girl. We, I met a girl on, I mean, I would use casual encounters too. You know, it's like that was sometimes I met a girl one time.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
And we watched a Nets game and made love, honestly, and she let me sign her cast, right? And I was like, you know, and we had a great time. I think we dated for a little bit.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
Oh, they've been on there, dude. I think we accidentally met up once. But there was a place, you know, I was like, I had such a tough time at a certain point in my life dating. There was something that added a level of mystery about it that I really liked.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
Oh yeah. It was, it was legal. Did you, it's funny to say that people started marriages. So people even got married off of putting out a dating. Like I would like to meet someone. Yeah. Wow. Did you ever get invited to a wedding or anything?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
Is pornography causing a problem in your life? Do you find yourself watching porno for longer periods of time and having trouble stopping? Is porn affecting your relationship or dating life? Well, you're certainly not alone. Watching pornography has become so commonplace today, and oftentimes men use porn to numb the pain of loneliness, boredom, anxiety, and depression.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
Shame and stigma prevent men from talking about these issues and getting help for them. I want to introduce you to my friend Steve. Steve is the founder of Valor Recovery, a program to help men overcome porn abuse and sexual compulsivity.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
Steve is a long-term sexual recovery member and has personally overcame the emotional and spiritual despair of abusing pornography and has dedicated his life to empowering men to do the same. Steve is an amazing person and he is a close friend of mine. I mean that. Valor Recovery helps men to develop the tools necessary to have a healthier sex life.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
Their coaches are in long-term recovery and will be your partner, mentor, and spiritual guide to transcend these problematic behaviors. To learn more about Valor Recovery, please visit them at www.valorrecoverycoaching.com or email them at admin at valorrecovery. recovery, coaching.com. Thank you.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
When you guys, at what point did you realize, okay, I need to, had you had enough of the day to day, what made you start to decide I want to sell the company? Um, I haven't sold the company. Oh, you haven't sold.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
Because you can look at the dividends and the earnings.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
So you really, you, did you kind of embody that nerd vibe? Like you were like, you saw a nerd and you were like, I'm going to be over here. I'll be there.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
Yeah, hey, that would be awesome, yeah. Oh, I could definitely see a spirit looking for a place to stay, you know?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
Yeah, what would you even do it? How many, yeah, because how much money can you put in your bank?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
And altruistic, just so our listeners know,
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
Yeah, understood. Yeah, I just wanted to know because, yeah, sometimes I forget, and sometimes maybe some of our listeners forget. Did you ever feel like other tech companies, even though they were probably, I bet, secretly jealous, looked down at Craigslist because it was this – Like, what was that like?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
No, I think it's fair to stand up for also what you are aiming for.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
How do you keep yourself balanced from that? Yeah, because... it's interesting because you seem like someone who would have a fair answer to what are some of the side effects, the negative side effects of, well, the deal is that it, uh, money of having some money, you know, or coming into some money.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
I like that, buddy. Yeah, only salt in our languages. Yeah, I was just wondering, was there one thing, like whether it was something like a specific Leonard Cohen piece, a record that he made that he'd autographed? Was there one nice thing you bought for yourself that was meaningful to you?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
wow that's cool yeah especially the one that's exactly what i have really yeah and i may have that one on a t-shirt wow yeah yeah something like that's nice man especially if it's art or something like that it's like you know if i could go back in time there was like a time one time i was in i was in tanzania you know and i was doing a mount kilimanjaro
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
okay right and we and afterwards we went someplace and they had a piece of art in there and it was like five hundred dollars right and i could spend like maybe three hundred dollars but i wished i'd have spent because going like it was 15 years ago and it's like you know the two hundred dollars didn't wouldn't change my life that much you know it was a lot of money at the time but it's like it's
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
I didn't even think about it two weeks later or two months later, you know? So I just wished that I would have, because I really liked the painting, you know? I was like, God, I just, and sometimes I wish, like every now and then there's little things like that. I wish I'd have gotten like a nice piece of art or something, you know?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
I'm trying to think of something else. Were there other – so Craigslist was kind of the – the stepchild of the tech industry in a weird way? Was it looked at like that? Because I could imagine how jealous, because here's people putting billions and millions of dollars into building this thing, this new avenue and all these venture capitalists and stuff like that.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
And then they, all this advertising and here you are with this basic kind of peer to peer, how can I offer something that could potentially help my neighbor or connect two neighbors that could use something?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
Do you know that? I know you're a Leonard Cohen fan. Yes. And this is, he had songs based that were based out of here. I think he spent time with Janis Joplin here. He did. Yeah, allegedly.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
Oh, and some of it's not true. Like there's stuff on my Wikipedia, like attaching me to like a part of my family, like they have half my family members wrong on it and stuff. And it like puts me in a, it's crazy. I'm like, all right.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
Yeah. Yeah, that's interesting. Well, that's a big thing about information now. It's like it's something I worry about with AI because if there's – And even just the history of the web, like things in the history of the web, because people can alter that over time.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
Oh, yeah. Oh, you'll call a customer service and they're like, we don't even know what you're talking about. But they still answer the phone. I'm like, who are you? Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
Understood. Yeah, I actually have a question about that, but I want to remember to ask this. How did Craigslist make money?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
For venture capitalists. So you don't have these money guys like, I need my return.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
Oh, my God, dude. You're crazy, Craig, because I've never heard somebody. Imagine I'm trying to open a water, right? I can't open it. And then I say, I'm stubborn. Like, I'm stubborn. It didn't even make sense. To me, that was very funny. You're like, I can't open it. And I was like, I don't know if you could open it or not. I was just trying to, I don't know. But I was like, oh, can I help you?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
And then you're like, I'm stubborn. But to me, in my head, I was like... He can't open it, but he just, the bottle's stubborn. Anyway, this didn't make any sense.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
Oh, I see what you're saying. You've talked a lot about independent journalism, right? Okay. And that's something that, like I've read anyway, is near and dear to your outlook in the world. Okay.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
Yeah, it's funny. I didn't realize until you said some of those things. Like, what if suddenly all of our cars were compromised or half of them or all of our ovens were compromised to the point where they started fires in all of our homes, you know? It was just kind of fascinating to me, you know?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
Yeah, and we don't even realize it. Were there other businesses that you tried to start before or after?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
But also with the right attitude to bring one person to another, you know, try to keep the golden rule in your mind, things you learned from Sunday school. What about – are your parents pretty proud of you? Are your parents still alive, Greg?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
Yeah. Yeah, it's so funny. I still keep in touch with a lot of my teachers, you know? It's important to me.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
Well, that's why we got to get that Ouija board going. Yes. You know, I think that's the next level. What are some small, before you leave, Craig, what are some goals in your life like right now? I know you've talked about some of the kind of work-oriented and giving back. Are there any kind of personal goals? Are there anything like... I don't know.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
Is there any kind of goals you have, even if they're just like human to yourself, things you still want to learn or do?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
But we like to do that. No, we do like to do that. I think that's good, guys. Pretty good. Is there anything else that you want to share that's important to you?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
Well, look, I do know if you really want to get some nitrous oxide, you might be able to find some on Craig's list.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
I don't know how somehow I almost get your sense of humor now, Craig. It's very interesting. That, uh, that might be tragic. Yeah. Well, thank you, man. Thank you for, uh, I like, I just like some, I like your initial goals of like, my goal is to help one person find something. This person's in need. This person might have this. How can I be of service there? Um,
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
learning when you notice that I'm not a good manager of this. So I need to get some help here. Right. It's not a strong suit of mine, maybe this world, but the customer relations is a strong suit of mine, you know, and, and that's interesting just because, you know, sometimes we all feel like we have to do everything in different spaces. And then, um, yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
And I'm glad you find a lady along the way. How long have you, how long has your marriage been now?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
Craig Neumer, thank you so much, man. Hey, it's my pleasure. I appreciate your time.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Once you get down to the ground floor again, sometimes you kind of want to stay down there. We used to listen to Leonard Cohen when I was a kid. My mom would put it on when we would have to clean the house on Saturdays and my mom would put it on. I remember that song, When the Walls Came Down.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
Then we'll take Berlin. Then we'll take Berlin. Yeah, dude, that's crazy. Those lyrics have mildly been in my head over the years, and I didn't even know that that's where they were from. They were from Leonard Cohen.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
Yeah, he reminds me of kind of a darker Anthony Bourdain of music in a way.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
And Tallahassee, Florida. Rosemont, Illinois. Winnipeg and Calgary in the Canada. Get all your tickets at theovon.com slash T-O-U-R. Thank you so much for your support. And thank you to the fella in Montana that gave me this jacket. Got some Indian artifacts on the back. And I just want to say thank you. I really like this jacket.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
Something a little less risque, huh?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
Okay, there we go. Well, we have you for a limited time today. I do want to talk. You are the Craig from Craigslist.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
That is true. Yes. Okay. And how did Craigslist start? I know that's a basic question, but you don't even think about it. As a regular human, we don't even know that you're real. You don't even know.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
So you were communicating on the internet just with people looking for information about living in a new area.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
So that's how it started. You started just emailing people just with information about things to do in the area. It started to grow. And it was just an actual list of people you were sending a message to.
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E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
So is that once a week or twice a month?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
We've also got some new merch, some new gang gang tees in pepper and ivory. And we've got a new gang gang hat. Check those out and more at TheoVonStore.com. Happy holidays to everyone. Today's guest is an entrepreneur and a philanthropist.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
Yes. And what were some of those early high value items? Like what was something that would come across? Are we talking like kind of like a... Like a painting? Are we talking like a little catamaran? What are we talking?
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E550 Craigslist Founder Craig Newmark
That's a great point. If you can help somebody get a job, that's residual.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
Fuck. Yeah. I just worry then whoever controls that is going to control everything.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
But what is somebody could like sometimes I guess with drone, they can come in, I guess, eavesdrop. They can see what's going on.
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E554 Joe Rogan
Yeah, they had a guy on there who came through and said that, oh, that Liversburg guy.
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E554 Joe Rogan
Do you think that this is just, this seems to me also like a fear tactic?
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E554 Joe Rogan
After UFC? Dying laughing. Yeah, your buddies were there. There was pro pool players? Yes. Yeah. Yeah. Jeremy Jones and Carl Boyce. And they had been swimming in a pool of beer. They'd been playing in a deep end of a pool of beer.
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E554 Joe Rogan
They believe it's him, though. Right. It's so crazy how when something happens now, it's like... There's we get the news so fast. Right. And we get video footage of it. Like we get a lot of things fast that you don't you start getting so many ideas of what's happened and so many like angles and lanes.
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E554 Joe Rogan
And you've had two podcasts come out from different people before you even get anything from like the authorities. Right. Right. But then you feel like you can't even trust the authorities anyway. It's so wild how we just are having a piece. Everyone is kind of piecing together for themselves what has happened every time.
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E554 Joe Rogan
Yeah. Which is the worst thing ever to say about a vehicle. I drive, I have a Cybertruck. And it's the, because then everybody's like, oh, is it fucking bulletproof, bitch? You know?
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E554 Joe Rogan
Look at this metal queer. People would yell at me and shit. Like, you're like, what is going on? Like, just crazy. I mean, but people want to challenge it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
Ew, they think they look gross. I feel a little embarrassed when I get out of it sometimes or when I have to get back in it. It's a statement. Well, I got it like five years ago. I wanted it so bad. And you can put it on $100 and say you had one. I got one on order. Yeah, I got one on order. Everybody had one.
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E554 Joe Rogan
But the thing that you always feel like you're working for lows, but you're never dropping off whatever you're supposed to drop off to.
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E554 Joe Rogan
Yeah, I feel like I'm always like... You are in a pickup truck, actually. That's a good point. I feel like I've always got a washer-dryer, but I just don't know how to... It has a feeling to it like I work for Home Depot. Like you're delivering stuff? Yeah.
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E554 Joe Rogan
Dude, I'll tell you what you don't want to do is get stuck in rural Mississippi having to charge that bitch. Did you? Yeah. No. During the holidays. Oh, no. What'd you do? Dude, well, first of all, I pull up. This must circle you like coyotes. It was crazy. Oh, no.
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E554 Joe Rogan
Yeah. Challenging your technology. People were, like, women who were, like, barren were, like, rubbing their p***s against it and stuff. People were, like, thinking it had magical powers. Some brother came right up, right? I had the window cracked. He ordered two blackened miles from me. Like, I was like, uh-uh. I'm just charging. Let me get you black and white. You can't even imagine where I was.
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E554 Joe Rogan
Town, probably 600 people. How did they have a charger? This one place had a charger. It was like an IGA.
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E554 Joe Rogan
It took me two hours to just get enough to get out of there.
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E554 Joe Rogan
Yeah. Oh, during that Chris Weidman fight, one of them kept yelling, hole-in-one over and over again. Really? Yeah, I knew that they were fucking... Hole-in-one? Yeah, I mean, they were just getting pretty cooked up.
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E554 Joe Rogan
Yeah. It was a tough, I mean, it took me half the day to get back to my mom's in Baton Rouge.
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E554 Joe Rogan
Yeah. Well, then when I drove back to Nashville, I hit like ones that had 300, 250 kilowatt hours. One has 400 kilowatt hours. It was a Mercedes dealership.
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E554 Joe Rogan
That thing will charge you up, I bet, in about 45 minutes. That's still a long way. All the way to 320 miles. That's still a long way. Dude, I plugged it in at my buddy's house. It gave me two miles an hour. So in the morning, I woke up six hours later and had 12 miles. That's so crazy. Yeah. So that was, but that was just like a, like a lamp. Yeah. Basically.
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E554 Joe Rogan
I don't think you really save any money. And especially if you have to charge on one of those trips, then it costs, like, it's pretty expensive to charge up. Like, it's not more than gas, but it's probably half the price. Dude, and then this was the worst thing. So, in Louisiana, they put a couple chargers back behind this church's chicken, right?
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E554 Joe Rogan
This was my holidays, dude. It was tragic. So I get off. They got a church's chicken, right? So to drive, the chargers are behind a church's chicken for some reason. But there's no lane to just drive back to the chargers. You have to get in the to-go lane of the church's chickens. You have to go in. So there's a big line at the Church's Chicken, right? So I get in line.
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E554 Joe Rogan
I have to wait in line to go to the lady at the order thing. You know, it's like, take your order at the to-go order. And I'm like, I'm just going to the Charger. So then I go back there. And now I have to, like, meander back and forth, like, back and forth to get my car to park. And it's hardly any room. Now I'm just facing the people who are waiting in line to pick up their chicken.
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E554 Joe Rogan
Yeah, dude, that was fun. That dinner was fun. That place was fancy in there. But it was a good time. Man, you just got back from Scotland.
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E554 Joe Rogan
Very. Oh, so all these people are like, and then I had to leave. Right. So I sit there in charge. I had to leave. Some lady is like, wouldn't let me back in line because she want me getting her chicken. Right. She's like, can't get my chicken. And I'm like, I fucking don't want your chicken. Right. I'm just trying to get out of here. But there was no way to go around the line.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
Or $27 or whatever. It just made me mad, dude. How fast was that charger? That charge was pretty quick. It was 250 kilowatts an hour. I'd say about an hour and 15 minutes you could charge her.
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E554 Joe Rogan
I got out of there early. I cut out early. But it was just a lot, man.
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E554 Joe Rogan
Yeah, I would say do not do it. That's what I would say.
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E554 Joe Rogan
Yeah, you're not getting that. You're getting 220, 210.
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E554 Joe Rogan
Oh, I pulled into a Charger with four or five miles left. right into that bit.
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E554 Joe Rogan
Well, how was it? It was cold as shit. Beautiful. Did they talk to you like that?
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E554 Joe Rogan
Yeah, you got to fucking, you're riding in your truck again.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
It can't be good for you. Our animals would do it. It can't be good. You know what I'm saying? You would see, I guess caved animals probably do it.
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E554 Joe Rogan
No, because it's your body trying to say, no way, and then your nose is like, yeah, yeah. You know what's really bad for you?
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E554 Joe Rogan
Moody music, you know you like to lay on your back and jerk off with your legs in the air like that Yeah Listen to PJ O'Rourke Listen to Joel Osteen I wanna get moody Dude that has to be the way the craziest way to jerk off is laying on your back legs in the air right legs in the air Yeah asshole to God And one of my buddies is like, sometimes I put a pillow under my butt.
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E554 Joe Rogan
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
You know, I'm still kind of recovering from the holidays, to be honest with you. I'm a slow recoverer. I didn't want the year to start. I just wasn't ready. And before you turn around, people are celebrating the ball drop and there's gas in the New Year tank and vroom, you're off. And I have to ask myself, what does the future hold for business? Can someone invent a crystal ball?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
That's N-E-T-S-U-I-T-E dot com slash Theo. netsuite.com slash Theo. Do you think demons are real? Oh yeah, I believe that there's good and evil.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
And some of it I believe might be our own individual...
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
wars you know and i believe that there could be a group war i'm amazed that at a group level we don't start to say hey this stuff is evil and let's not do it right but i think that's where like temptation and all that comes in and yeah i think it's pretty fascinating sometimes i'll wake up with and look at my life as like wow this is a war i'm in this is a and i am the the the the guy who's leading my vessel or whatever you know or there is doing my best you know doing my best
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E554 Joe Rogan
Yeah. Yeah, Stonehenge is crazy, dude. I remember when in school they would teach us like Stonehenge. It's crazy. Who knows what happened, you know? Yeah. Like Smurfs, aliens. Like they had all this crazy shit they would teach you.
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E554 Joe Rogan
I'd lay on my back in 69, this thing, brother. It's already going to be strong, Joe. Quiet. Don't look at me when I do it.
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E554 Joe Rogan
It's got to be tough for a kid, huh? Oh, my God. And you probably pretend that he doesn't because you don't want to hurt his feelings or whatever.
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E554 Joe Rogan
Yeah, yeah. Smurfs. Or just everybody didn't know what it was about, right?
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E554 Joe Rogan
Yeah, and sometimes the kid doesn't even know if the dad won or not. He's still cheering, and you're like, this doesn't make any sense. This kid is crazy. Well, that kid might have other problems.
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E554 Joe Rogan
Oh, yeah. Sometimes I'll see reels on the internet on social media of kids that are young sparring. It's really funny. Sometimes they don't know what to do.
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E554 Joe Rogan
I mean, I would slay out. If you could go back in time being a kid, think of all the stuff you would do.
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E554 Joe Rogan
What about Goggins? Did he ever suffer with addiction? I don't know if he did or not. Oh, yeah, that's right, huh?
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E554 Joe Rogan
I told him to get sugar-free. Zero. I asked him to get sugar-free. Zero's good. You want a little bit of it?
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E554 Joe Rogan
and um but then we went there one time we were touring and we drove by and literally they had an exit for stonehenge and it was just right there it was like a rest area it was just like right off the highway and when you went there was it impressive no it was like i was impressed because i'd learned they didn't give a fuck there's like people over there just like changing their kids in front of it and stuff on the ground like people didn't give a shit you'd walk up to it and touch it right
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E554 Joe Rogan
Yeah. You want a taste of this whiskey? You want a gram of this shit? Dude, I would get so, I've just been getting so dehydrated. First of all, why is dehydration more of a thing now? Dude, when I was growing up, nobody was like, are you dehydrated?
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E554 Joe Rogan
You started talking about bombs and aliens. You haven't met you, dude. I got to introduce you to you. You're going to be intrigued.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
But no, I think, what was I saying? Hydration is important, though. That's why electrolytes are important. Why is it a big thing now? You remember saying years ago, nobody was like, 10 years ago, people were like, yeah, stay hydrated, but nobody was like, there wasn't this big crazy thing about it. Well, there was once they figured out Gatorade.
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E554 Joe Rogan
Do you think, do you believe in that hydrogen water stuff where it's like you charge water? Yeah, it's legit. It is? Yeah. You gotta drink it like right after you make it.
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E554 Joe Rogan
I've never been a big shoe guy, really. I got these Jelly Roll shoes on he gave me.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
But they're men, they're really men's slippers, and it's something about it. Yeah, they're slippers. You're wearing slippers.
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E554 Joe Rogan
Do you feel like we get an unrealistic view of reality because of all the stuff that we see online?
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E554 Joe Rogan
It's right there, dude. They had like a sign that was like, I don't even think it said, please don't touch. It was like just something more vague than that.
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E554 Joe Rogan
And did the guy make a sound when he hit him or anything like that?
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E554 Joe Rogan
Yeah, especially if you're at a bar too. Shit is wet. I don't like to be in places where people are real drunk because shit can get too weird. It makes me nervous, I think.
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E554 Joe Rogan
Imagine how many people have just sobered up and been like, you're lying. I did. That happened. And they don't even have any memory of it.
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E554 Joe Rogan
He's got a good right hand. Did you see any UFC fight or any fight when you were in Scotland? What did you do for fun when you were there?
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E554 Joe Rogan
Wow. That seems, first of all, weight class. That's a catch weight, huh?
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E554 Joe Rogan
We have some tour dates coming up. We have East Lansing, Michigan, Eugene, Oregon, Victoria, B.C. in the Canada, College Station, Belton, Texas, San Antonio, Oxford, Mississippi down there, Fayetteville, Arkansas. Tuscaloosa, Alabama. That's Roll Tide Country. Tallahassee, Florida. Nashville, Tennessee. They're in the home city. Winnipeg in the Canada and Calgary as well in the Canada.
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E554 Joe Rogan
That's why you got to go to a meeting, dude. I've got to go to a meeting before I do this shit. Okay. Just for the record. That's a Mazda, I think, huh?
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E554 Joe Rogan
Well, people want to do dangerous stuff. Did you see there's a woman that just died trying to pet an elephant, I think, in Thailand?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
Spanish woman killed by elephant in Thailand while bathing animal.
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E554 Joe Rogan
Why do we have that fatuation with people that want to take pictures of, like, you know, let me pet this newborn cheetah, right? Let me bottle feed this fucking senior citizen tiger. You know what I'm saying? There's always, like, let me bathe this elephant.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
Yeah. RFK's going to end that shit. I'll say that, dude. We're going to have real active tigers fucking attacking people.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
But that's the thing. It's like, why do we have that infatuation, though, of like, I want to take this with this cobra around my neck. I want to take this, you know. That's a good question. You can't, like, get these things where you want to pet a tiger. You want to, you know, brush a lion's teeth. You want to tickle a cyst out in Akron or something without getting, you know.
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E554 Joe Rogan
You're going to get attacked. You know what I'm saying? You've got to be careful. Yeah. But what is that inside of us that makes us want to do that?
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E554 Joe Rogan
I haven't seen that. What else was I going to ask you about?
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E554 Joe Rogan
I thought it was just a bunch of fucking, I think it's a, what does a PSYOP mean? I always hear that. Psychological Operation. Okay. I think it's a PSYOP by somebody. I think it's not. Yeah, it's a couple drones of a New Jersey, whatever. I don't fucking know. I don't fucking know. It could be Jimmy John's is going to have a new delivery thing they're going to try next year.
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E554 Joe Rogan
I wouldn't be surprised at all. I wouldn't be surprised if Amazon's going to do a new. I wouldn't be shocked at all. It could have been one of those. You know, they have those New Year's Eve displays, like fireworks displays now are drones instead of fireworks.
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E554 Joe Rogan
So they'll have like a thousand drones and they just make a bunch of shit and it's different, right?
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E554 Joe Rogan
It could have been 11 drones escaped from a drones enslavement camp where they're forced to do these shows. And it's going to be a Pixar movie in two years. So you're not concerned at all? I'm not concerned. Dude, look, if they're going to come get me, come get me. Come get me. What are they doing? Who are they? Who are they? These fucks. Yeah. They're going to come, come get me.
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E554 Joe Rogan
Come get me, bitch. Yeah. If they want to get me, they know where I am.
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E554 Joe Rogan
Yeah. What are you doing up there? Come down here and fuck if you want to party. Whoa. Or come down here and fucking party. Come down here and have a drink. Come down here and do something. You're a drone in the distance fucking looking at shit. Do you think we'll ever get to a point where aliens are so comfortable with us they can just come hang out? Dude, I think Earth to aliens is a dump, dude.
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E554 Joe Rogan
I think Earth to aliens. Because aliens go on vacation every year, right? They're just like us, right? And they take their kids on a trip or whatever. And the kids who are so poor, right? And look, we were poor mom. We'd take us to the beach when it was freezing cold and fucking wouldn't tell us, you know, fucking whatever, dude. It was like, it seems cold. It's like, whatever. So, yeah.
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E554 Joe Rogan
But the aliens that don't care about their kids, whatever, they bring them here to fucking shit. They're like, oh, and the kid's like, we have to go to fucking Earth, dude. Our life sucks, you know? Like the cool alien kids go to more neater shit, you know? Right. Does that make sense to you? Yeah. Yeah. That's the kind of thing I'm saying, man.
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E554 Joe Rogan
Did you know Scotland actually has some of the most UFO sightings in the whole world? Well, they had one of the best UFO sightings.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
Bonnie Bridge. That's it. There you go. Most UFO sightings on the planet.
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E554 Joe Rogan
They're the nicest people. They're the nicest people. And they don't have a lot of gays over there either. They have a lot of blue-eyed people over there. You know that?
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E554 Joe Rogan
I mean, they have them. I bet they don't say that they're secretive. Nah, I don't think so.
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E554 Joe Rogan
They wear a lot of kilts, that's for sure, dude. There you go. It's close to gay. I'm wearing a dress. But it's like, what if a kilt says free awning on it? What if it's a rainbow kilt? Do they sell rainbow kilts? They probably do. It's always raining. What if it just says free awning on it? You're like, God, that seems like a trap, bro. Dry your head off down here.
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E554 Joe Rogan
But if it says kids awning, you got to be, that's fucking. Yeah, free toys. Cool, dude. Hey, the top's empty.
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E554 Joe Rogan
I'm just saying, dude, the Scottish, we need more of them, dude, and I believe that in the future we'll get more of them, man.
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E554 Joe Rogan
They've had some explosions of population, I know, over the past 50 years, I think. Oh, really? Yeah, I think so.
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E554 Joe Rogan
Most redheads, most blue-eyed people. Yep. Most redheads per capita. As of 2022, the population of Scotland was 5.4 million.
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E554 Joe Rogan
I'm going to keep an atmosphere going. They're making a comeback. I think everyone has subscriptions that they've forgotten about. I recently had a umbrella subscription just sending me every seven weeks getting another umbrella in the mail, just stacking them up. And I didn't need it. I forgot I had it.
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E554 Joe Rogan
well rocket money can help if you have on it wanted subscriptions rocket money is a personal finance app that helps you find and cancel your unwanted subscriptions monitors your spending and helps lower your bills so you can grow your savings that's what they do with rocket money's dashboard you can get a clear view of your expenses across all your accounts
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
Rocket Money will even try to negotiate lower bills for you. They automatically scan your bills to find opportunities to save, and then you can ask them to negotiate for you. They'll deal with customer service so you don't have to. Rocket Money has over 5 million users and has saved a total of $500 million in canceled subscriptions.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
Cancel your unwanted subscriptions and reach your financial goals faster with Rocket Money. Go to rocketmoney.com slash T-H-E-O today. That's rocketmoney.com slash Theo. rocketmoney.com slash Theo. So it's a new year in 2025, and one of the things about a new year is that it brings some new energy. It does. Whether we look at it or not, as important, it's a refresher, right?
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E554 Joe Rogan
It's something, okay, let's start again. And that's why I think if you're considering starting a new business, that now is the time. Now is the time to answer that question, how am I going to build something for myself? Well, Shopify is how you're going to make it happen, and let me tell you how. The best time to start your new business is right now.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
Calm the chaos of order fulfillment with the shipping software that delivers. Switch to ShipStation today. Go to ShipStation.com and use code THEO to sign up for your free trial. That's ShipStation.com, code THEO. I had a question. Do you think, Joe, about, do you think that Elon and Vivek Ramaswamy will really be able to have an effect on things?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
I know two times. I think even after that, they're like, we got to let him keep going.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
Well, it all makes sense. I mean, just like religion can find you or just like the government can find you.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
Well, this guy, obviously, it seems like was trying to flirt with whoever he's talking to me. And I'm not saying the guy enjoys buddies or whatever. I'm just saying it seemed like that to me.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
Oh. And you think there's a lot of people being fake gays or whatever to help the government?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
Yeah. Do you think... That's solid. Yeah. It seems like a great plan. Do you think that humanity is supposed to reach like this place where we kind of get it all figured out? Or do you think it's always just this constant ebb and flow of... like step forward, step back, or two steps forward, step back.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
It makes sense. Do you think we can trust our FBI anymore?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
20. I just wonder what starts to happen if you don't, if as a society you don't believe and trust in, I believe that the trust overall in government and government and authority in America really as a whole is kind of starting to dissipate.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
So then what, so where did, has that ever happened in history? And then I'm sure it has. And where do we go from here?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
Who do they have to answer to, Vivek and Elon? Who do they have to first present stuff to? Somebody said it was Marjorie Taylor Greene. Is that true or somebody made that up? It is.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
I met her at a party, actually. Yeah? Did you? I didn't know that it was her. I don't know a ton about politics, but it was definitely interesting, though. I'm fucking sure. Tucker had that party for Alp.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
But yeah, it seemed cool. Mel Gibson was there. That was pretty cool.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
Oh, I want something all the fucking time, dude. Yeah. I want a fucking. Want another sniff? I wish I had that trach hole. I'd just fucking. Want another sniff? Boof shit right into my neck all day. Yeah. I'll take whatever you got, boy.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
I heard a buddy the other day saying he's sober. Call your aunt, dude.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
Oh, yeah. Give me some of that Katy Perry dust, buddy. Joey, you want to see me ride it, don't you?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
Cow money. You were reluctant to give it back. You were thinking about going again. I'll fucking go again, boy. Huh?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
Yeah, dude. I'll do one more little one. I'm going to do a big one, dog. We ready.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
Oh, fuck. That shit will turn you into a raccoon, baby boy. Dude, you know the worst thing was? Besides that?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
It reminds me of that thing. Have you ever seen that game show? It's Sauce Challenge or whatever. What? Hot Sauce Challenge. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Hot Wings. Hot Wings, right?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
Hot Ones. Have you ever done that? Yeah, I did it a few years ago. And it was great. That guy, Sean Evans, is a great guy. That's all I hear about him. Everybody says he's a nice guy. He's so smart. And he's just a nice dude. Yeah. Um, but people are always like, how are the sauces? Well, seven of them are sauces. A couple of them are fucking shit.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
You used to clean this out of a boat, you know, it's like, it's like, like sauces went into that weird realm where it was like, we just want to burn a hole in you kind of thing, you know? Yeah. And so some of them got to be very, um, I don't want to get sued for saying that. Can I say that? I'm just joking, right?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
But they're like, some of them were like, oh, this isn't, I wouldn't put this on anything. Right, it's too strong. It's not a sauce. It's just like a chemical, it felt like.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
It's nice. Yeah, it's like a Mexican Christmas type of thing. I think it comes out every year.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
That's what was terrible. The chips are bullshit. It's just a gateway drug for spice or whatever.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
It was Cool Ranch. Oh, they're so good. They were good. I remember when they came out with those, people couldn't even fucking didn't know what to do. They couldn't stop eating them. I remember our stepdad came back for like a week when they came out. And he's like, yeah, everything's going to be fine. Cool Ranch. Fuck, they were good.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
Oh, dude, Cool Ranch was good. I remember... I'm trying to think of the early cheese balls. Those were good. Those were good. You can't outlaw that stuff.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
Do you think, are some people going to start to be like, oh shit, this guy's going to take away Chick-fil-A like you were saying? Probably.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
Have you ever seen Roll Tide Willie? That guy... Who's that?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
I'll put you on him. I guess he's kind of a comedian now. He played football for Alabama and then he got injured. He was in the military. See if you can pull up something of him.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
Yeah. Sitting here watching and waiting on the bomb again. Look right here on this side. Chilling.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
What you doing? The Tide, Alabama Tide, he likes. Wow. That's one of his favorites.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
Like that guy, have some tolerance. Yeah, he served for our country too. Did he? Yeah. He got injured in the, or I think he got injured. He was in the military with my friend's dad. But he, I think he played at University of Alabama, but now he's like the biggest fan. But he's kind of a, yeah, a mascot for Alabama. He's like the, they call it, he goes by Roll Tide Willie.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
Yeah, now it would be his wife would make a TikTok about it in a heartbeat, I feel like. Or her sister would.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
Yeah, I just think we're just talking about, what were we talking about? Oh, comedians, entertainers. I think entertainment's getting interesting because a lot of people are getting entertainers too just off of social media reels, right? Right. So it's like you're finding somebody you might want to watch like Jessica McGowan or something. Who's that?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
Shit, the lady from Buffy the Vampire Slayer I'm talking about? Or, you know, Gwyneth Paltrow. Or watch like a... Or watch Roll Tide. You know what I'm saying? Entertainment is just super interesting now.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
That's way more than watched CNN. We bring the boom. Yeah, that kid. And the one kid I heard didn't even make good grades, unfortunately, which is like, why should he? Why should he?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
you should be but they're taking all they're taking but yeah i guess i'm wondering what are the chinese actually taking that they don't already have for me except i mean they could geolocate me your dna they're gonna clone you you're gonna be like alex jones you're gonna have a different version of you half my family's in recovery you can have it bud you can fucking have it dude do you think any of those drones are chinese
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
How could we have in our airspace a drone from another country and we don't know it? Is it that we don't know it or we can't do anything about it? Oh, we could do something about it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
And they're never going to admit to that. They'll say it was, yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
You'll be on one of those 411 documentaries or something.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
You can't hit with a missile out of a fucking fighter jet. There'd be barely enough for a wolf to lick a little bit of you off a rock.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
He survived both of them? He just survived both of them.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
Jeez. And did he say how he survived each time? What was the guy's name?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
What do you think it looks like coming up? Do you think people start to... If people continue to be so... like full of fear do we do people like resort back to like their tribal nature or what kind of starts to happen they definitely do if the power goes out
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
There. Tsutomu Yamaguchi. Yeah. Tsutomu Yamaguchi. Tsutomu Yamaguchi.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
But some Asians live very long. You can get 120 years out of it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
It's so insane. But it just goes to show you that somewhere inside of us, there's an evil that will be evil, you know?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
Do you have a bomb shelter? Joe, do you have a bomb shelter at home?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
Can you even fathom one second it looks one way, and the next second it looks another way?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
It'd be so scary. Something you thought was probably for a purpose in the beginning and then you changed your mind during it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
A reinforced stairwell in the office protected the conference room where Yamaguchi and his colleagues were.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
They just heard his story and it says someone took cover in a manner similar to how he described in Hiroshima.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
motherfucker, dude, how much would have to happen in America for things to get to a place where people are just like Every man for himself like do you feel like that like that kind of thing power going out?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
And do you think for the first day, people would be kind of organized, like, let's see what happens here, watching the news, and then the second day, shit would get AWOL? Like, how quick would people...
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
Not at the last minute. What are you going to put an ad at the last minute? Sorry it's so late, guys. Need to learn how to hunt or whatever.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
And the farmers are going to be sitting there licking their chops.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
Oh, people are going to try to get them for their food.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
has more guns. It's so embedded in our culture because I'll meet people sometimes and they're like, you guys have all these guns. It's like, there's no way to not have guns here. Well, there's more guns than there are people here. But how would you even do it if some people were like, you should get rid of guns, right? Because you hear people say that sometimes.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
Dude, imagine you fall asleep and it fucking goes out. And then you have to wake up the other people and tell them.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
Really? Sure. He loves that. He loves to meet a man with his face.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
Just saw the first episode. Isn't that amazing? It's so cool.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
So bizarre. You'd park out there. You'd be lucky to find a spot. It had a really 80s vibe out there. They had like one kind of neon kind of light that was kind of like they'd have their door for their office like open a little bit. And it didn't seem like it was an office. It seemed like it was a place where they shot like kind of quick porn over.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
We used to share a wall with a nail salon for a while. Really? Yeah, and they'd always be chattering in there and yelling about stuff. It was fun.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
Some of that was fun, dude. I remember we used to share a wall with Fighter and the Kid for a while, and that was so much fun. We'd bang on the wall at each other.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
Yeah, your spigot, yeah, really, you had the most open spigot in
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
You work harder than any podcaster by far, man. And you're so great at it, man.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
Have you seen people do it? Like when you go hunting and stuff? I've done it. You have?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
Oh, yeah. Well, we learn a lot of stuff by listening to you learn it, man. So it's cool, you know.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
um i have one question i know you one time we were talking about if you ever retired right yeah and you said maybe you would start painting maybe if you ever retired did i say that yeah it could have been okay even if you were i was probably taking some of that delta eight what's it called the stuff they have out here delta eight it's legal it's a legal loophole legal weed
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
Yeah, I'm all fucked up on Delta 8, son. You had a Delta 8?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
But are you still using it? It's legit. Oh, yeah, sure it is. It is. It's at a gas station.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
Talk to Red Band. One of those makes your nose bleed really bad. Red Band stuff. Those aggressive rhinos, whatever those ones are, they make your fucking nose bleed.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
Oh, I went down the road. I used to get them from India. I used to get all that shit. India? Yeah. But what would you paint, dude? That's what I was thinking. I was just thinking about you painting. I was lying. You were?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
If you think you could have devoted so much, as much time, because that's one thing you start to learn about life. It's like, oh, I only have so much time, right? If you could have devoted as much time, you think, do you think you could have been really good at it? Because I know you really loved it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
Yeah. Yeah. Maybe, yeah, maybe that would be nice and Peyton.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
Do you ever wear a disguise when you go places? Every day.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
Get all your tickets at TheoVaughn.com slash T-O-U-R. And just thank you for supporting live comedy and supporting the Return of the Rat Tour. Today's guest is a standup comedian. He's a UFC commentator. He is the biggest podcaster in the world. I'm thankful for him and Jamie for welcoming me here. The first half of this episode was on his channel and the second half of the episode is here now.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
Tall Biden. It was a real thing. Do you think, what happens to him after he goes away in office? What happens to him? Jimmy Carter.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
Who controls Joe Biden if he's not controlling himself?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
Some of the guys said they don't want the pardon. You see that?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
Tiger King, too, somebody said. Oh, he better pardon Tiger King. I think he did. Didn't he just? Somebody said he just pardoned him.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
Bro, when Tiger King gets back out of here, fucking wait, America.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
I don't know. I wonder if he got out of this wonder what kind of job he would get into. They're not going to let him work offshore or whatever. Stuffed animals.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
Hey, what you doing with all that cut? Take me to the river.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
Are you enjoying that? Yeah, I think I am, man. I think it's been, I've been trying to learn more, you know, so that's been one of my goals.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
Yeah, for sure. I mean, I knew Bobby, which was lucky and we were going through Vermont and Bernie said he would come on the podcast. So that was super fortunate. And then, um, Dana helped, you know, I wanted to talk to Trump cause his brother had died of alcoholism and it was like a world that I had like spent a lot of my life like
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
you know in and dealing with and so i wanted to like just see what he like if he was normal about something like that i guess so yeah but i think it's been interesting um i think it felt like a lot of responsive i got i i started to have some ego issues i think i was just trying to be like You know, just know what you're doing, man. Like, you don't have some big responsibility.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
I think I had this ego trap where it made me felt, I just had to kind of manage some stuff for a little bit. But I've been feeling better now, I think.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
I think you just start to think, oh, well, I'm important, right? And it's okay if I am like – it's okay if I have importance to myself and there's things that I want to like examine and learn for myself and that sort of thing.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
Oh, yeah, and you do it like that or whatever? Back and forth and back and forth. Like Cotton Eye Joe or whatever?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
Right. I think it started to just scare me. So I just, I got nervous. And then I had people that would ask me about stuff that I felt like I didn't know about, or people would think that I knew more than I did, or like I had something to do with like the election, like things like that made me super kind of nervous. And so I think I just was kind of trying to manage that for a bit. And, um,
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
But I've been feeling better about it. And I know some places are things to be funny. Some places are things that mean something to me. Just like learning about healthcare and people getting screwed. There are some smaller causes. I can't learn about everything. But there are some things that I do care about that I can seek more information about.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
And then to just try to get more interested in things. Just be... you know, learn about when I open myself up to learn about more things, you know?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
Yeah. That happens too. I mean, this is probably the most relaxed I felt like being around you today, you know? Around me? Yeah, I think I just like... Yeah, sometimes you get nervous. Do you get nervous just because so many people are listening? Is that what it is? The numbers? Yeah, I think at first. And then I think... Yeah, I mean, I look up to you, I think. And so I... And you're the champ.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
Yeah. And you always, anytime I think that way, you always bring it back down to a super normal place. So thank you.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
Yeah. Yeah, man. And I think it's interesting. It's like, you know, there's still things that I want to do in my life personally. And there's like talking with people has helped me a ton, you know, like even just confidence from being like, you know, from getting to talk with different UFC fighters and things over the years.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
Like there's a lot of like people that I've gotten to speak to or people I've heard on your shows and other shows that inspire me like in little moments of my life, you know, like it's important, you know. Yeah. Yeah, so I don't know I definitely I mean I feel like you know I just want to you know try my best keep learning I don't know and just have a good time too.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
Just fucking go, huh? I thought that thing was going to light fire eventually. Yeah, it didn't. In Scotland, did you see any good music? ACDC's from Scotland.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
Even seeing Shane, seeing Shane for literally, my mom texted me last night. She's like, that's Shane Gillis. He just makes some of the best faces. Right away. And so even earlier, we go back to, you're like, I got Shane Gillis back here. I thought you were, it was like a new beverage or something you had made. And so I go back and there's a sauna back there by your gym.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
The gym's pretty dope, right? Yeah, the gym's great. But I didn't think you had a Shane Gillis on tap. So we fucking go in there and there's a meat closet where you're drying aged beef. I actually do have one of those. Yeah, of course. And there's a fucking full-body strap of Shane Gillis hanging in that bitch. And he just puts his head up near the glass.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
Yeah, it definitely helps, man. I'm starting to look. Because I'm not having it. I got to get a family soon, too, dude.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
I love you, too, man. Thanks for everything. This is the end of part two. There it is. That's both of them. Jamie, thanks so much, too. Nice to meet your dog for the second time. Powerful call.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
That's what I was thinking of earlier when we were talking.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
It's like the Mandela effect. Yeah. That's what it is. Yeah, what's a famous band that is from Scotland then?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
Came at you a little hard there. What else do they sing, ACDC?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
It's your show. That's true. We're in trouble, dude. Yeah, we probably won't be able to play that. But what was it called?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
No, I did see that they're supposed to. Dana White was doing something with Mark Zuckerberg and that they were part of his board now and that they were going to allow more free speech. That's what they said.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
Yeah, it says in a video posted alongside a blog post by the company on Tuesday, Chief Executive Mark Zuckerberg said third-party moderators were too politically biased and it was time to get back to our roots around free expression. But do you think they're – I wonder if there's something else going on because I find it hard to believe they're really willing to give up that bias.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E554 Joe Rogan
Talk a little shit about the government. But how do we know that the information in AI isn't being adjusted to fit whatever they want it to say? That's one thing I always thought. It is.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#581 - Big Guy
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#581 - Big Guy
It was it was crazy, dude. I'm there. It's already weird enough. Somebody's massaging a kid. I'm getting fucking big guy. Big guy is over there fucking working me in, and the little dude's over here getting fucking chopped out. You know, this little fucking sixth, fifth graders or whatever. This little fifth graders, he's getting over there fucking chopped out by Chim Chop, your boy, right?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#581 - Big Guy
And I'm like, can you even massage a kid? I'm thinking, and then somebody just... started a fart out of their body. And I think it was the kid, right? Because I think, look, if you massage a kid, they're going to fart. They got to strike back somehow because it's illegal to touch them. So, and it sounded like, it sounded like, like, I don't know.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#581 - Big Guy
It sounded like somebody was drinking milk and then just like, it was just, it sounded like a, It just sounded like a ghost wearing booty cologne that had just climbed out of that child. And I'm not saying it was definitely the kid who was in there doing farts or whatever, but, you know, I don't know, you know.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#581 - Big Guy
I'm no farting Luther King or whatever, but I have a dream that somebody farting in here. But there was another guy in there. So it could have been other guy, you know, whoever that was. Louis Farticon. No, it's just a it's just a activist joke. Anyway. No. Yeah. It could have been this other guy in there. I don't know. Because there was another guy in there.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#581 - Big Guy
All right, here we are. Welcome to the month of May in the year 2025. Thank you for joining me here today. Thank you for letting me be a part of your life and you be a part of mine today. Happy Mother's Day. We'll start with that. We got a nice episode of we got some Mother's Day stuff. We're going to get into a little bit of light news.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#581 - Big Guy
Just a guy like worked at a bank or something or was like cheating on his wife. Some guy. Right. And they were over there shining him up. They over there really getting into his shoulders and neck. You know, he had two kind of medium guys. He didn't have no big day. Like I did, bitch. But they chopping into him. But at some point, the room started to smell bad. Somebody chopped off a real fart.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#581 - Big Guy
And it sounded like somebody had put like milk on, just like their butt had been drinking milk and then just fart, just did a fart, bruh. It just sounded like somebody had taken a tight foot out of a wet boot, you know? Out of a wet rubber boot. But anyway, what is that? Happy Mother's Day, bro. That's what I'm telling y'all. I got a massage, and you got to take care of yourself when you get them.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#581 - Big Guy
When I go in a massage place, first thing I say, no pop pop. I say, no, pop, pop. Tap on my wiener two times, pop, pop. No, pop, pop for me. That's what I say when I go into those places. We got an episode. Oh, and that means don't touch me. Don't touch this. Don't stay off my wiener. That's what I say. Stay off my small guy.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#581 - Big Guy
Big guy. No, no. Medium guy. Okay. But I tell them right when I walk in, don't jerk me off. I do that myself. I do it at home. I do it under, you know, I do it with closed blinds or whatever. Music on, music off, whatever. I don't jerk off with the fan on. I say that point blank. You see some dudes, bro, I know. I got buddies.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#581 - Big Guy
You walk in their room, they smell in there like they've been jerking off. And the fan is on, bro. Have some respect, bro. You out there drying out your root or whatever, and you out there popping off, bro. You out there freaking earning pearls out of your own ween out there. So praise God. We'll get to an ad in just a second. We got a new pope. Is that right there, Easton?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#581 - Big Guy
And what did you think about it? What's the news on him? You got any information on him?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#581 - Big Guy
Bobby Prevost, baby. And who do the Packers have? Aaron Rodgers, dude. It's a wrap, bro. Jordan loved it. Dude, nobody. The Pope. Dude, we got the Pope, huh? Go Cubs go. Hey, Chicago, what do you say? We got the Pope today. Gang, boy. We right here. Big Gay. Big Gay. Damn, bro. Hope he stops the massaging of children. You know what I'm talking about? We shut it down, brother.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#581 - Big Guy
I don't know if we can say that. And how do we know when they picked the Pope?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#581 - Big Guy
Oh really? So how long did it take him to choose this Pope?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#581 - Big Guy
And then we had a call a few weeks back about grief and loss. And we had a lot of nice feedback calls and informative heart, heart, heartish, heart, heartfelt contributions. So we'll get into those in a bit as well. But, yeah, Mother's Day, that's it. Because your mama raised you. Think about that. Your mama. Boy, you was doing nothing. Your little ass laying there. Doing nothing, boy.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#581 - Big Guy
Have we ever had a black Pope yet? No. Wow, bro. That's what we got to get that black Pope boy.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#581 - Big Guy
What about an Asian Pope? Have we had it? Oh, we got to get a damn low Asian Pope way. Just a little bit of prayer fried rice, boy, you feel me? Economic impact dot com. You know, we read for different financial advertisements on this podcast, and I want to iterate one that I think has become my favorite. It's called Acorns. I love it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#581 - Big Guy
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#581 - Big Guy
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#581 - Big Guy
Paid non-client endorsement. Compensation provided incentive to positively promote Acorns. Tier 1 compensation provided. Investing involves risk. Acorns Advisors LLC and SEC registered investment advisor. You can view important disclosures at acorns.com slash T-H-E-O.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#581 - Big Guy
Today's episode is brought to you by... I want to say thank you to mom for having all the answers. She had them all. She didn't... Sometimes they were wrong, yeah, but she had them all. Imagine something just asking you questions for 18 years and more. And you do your best to answer every one. Yup, that's a mom. But this year we're answering for mom.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#581 - Big Guy
And the answer is we're going to give them flowers plus a real break. Because moms are at it 24-7. And flowers, it's nice, but you know what they really want is a break. from everyone's questions, from the endless to-do list, from momming. Oh, I still ask my mom so many questions. I will call and ask my mom what shoe size I wear. I could look in my shoe.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#581 - Big Guy
I could do a ruler against my foot, but I will call my mom. And if she doesn't answer it when I call, I will just not know what my shoe size is for the day. Oh, if I was a mom, I would just put earplugs in. That's what I would do. I would tell my kids I would have like one of those lights that taxis have above them on the top of a taxi that says when it's available or not.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#581 - Big Guy
I would turn the light off, not available. And then I would, what would I do if I were a mom? Oh, I would get in a big bubble bath. That's what my mom used to do. She would yell. She'd yell at us and say something. And say we weren't going to be able to have something. Then you would hear her slam her door. And then every now and then you'd hear her get in that bubble bath right there.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#581 - Big Guy
And maybe crack open a cold beer or something. A cold little can of milk or whatever. You'd hear her crack it open and get that bubble bath going. sud so high you couldn't see, hear nothing. Is she in there? I don't know what she would, and I think she would just sit in there in the bubbles and have a little sip of beer or cold milk. Something to get her through the day, man.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#581 - Big Guy
So if I was a mother, I would do that. Oh, and I forgot to add, this Mother's Day, when you buy your mom flowers, you'll get up to $75 as a Dash Pass member or up to $50 as a non-Dash Pass member towards a family meal that mom doesn't have to cook. a fun activity so mom can play without planning, or a self-care retreat in case mom just wants some me time.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#581 - Big Guy
Yep, that's Theo50, T-H-E-O, number five, number zero, to get 50% off up to a $15 value when you spend $15 or more at local florists, convenience, grocery, and retail stores on DoorDash. And starting May 9th through Mother's Day weekend, your flowers order will unlock credit towards select gifts that'll take cooking, planning, and more off of Mom's Plate.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#581 - Big Guy
Make this Mother's Day special with DoorDash. Terms apply. All right. You know, one of the last episodes, the last solo episode we had called Chili Boy or something like that. Was it Chili Baby? Chili Boy. Chili Baby. Chili. Oh, Pickle Chili. And it was about a month ago, and a man called in who had lost his girlfriend to cancer. So we're going to take a quick listen to that.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#581 - Big Guy
He goes and visits her grave every day, you would say, for months onward. Man, thank you for sharing this, brother.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#581 - Big Guy
Hunting for a fucking hand tit. That's all you was doing. You was just hunting for that little hand tit with your little hands. You was a little slurp lord. And your mother raised you. First of all, if something came up to me and started sucking on my breast, on my tit, or whatever it's called, tit for men or whatever, I would not then raise it. You have to think about that.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#581 - Big Guy
Yeah, thank you for the call, brother. And we discussed this on a previous episode, but we got some calls that came in, and I wanted to listen to some of them here just so you can get an idea. As always, the hotline, guys, is 985-664-9503. And here's a call that came in about grief. We asked callers if they had any suggestions for that gentleman, and here's some of the responses that we got.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#581 - Big Guy
Love you, too, bro. Thank you, man. Man. Man, that's just... That's all, you know, it's, that's nice of him to call. He called out of Louisiana. I see that area code three, three, seven over there. And you can hear the Bayou in the back of his drawer right there.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#581 - Big Guy
Um, yeah, I remember after my dad was gone, even still, sometimes if I'm having like a tough day, whenever I go to sleep at night, I'll, uh, yeah, I'll hope that I get to see him or that he shows up, you know? And then sometimes it's like gets to be further. Sometimes it's like further and further between times. And then, um, Yeah, and you just wish, you hope that somebody will be there.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#581 - Big Guy
But then sometimes they are in your dream. And yeah, that's awesome, man. That's a really nice sentiment to share. Thank you for that call. Let's take another call here.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#581 - Big Guy
Thank you for listening, man. I appreciate that. Thank all you, all anybody who listened.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#581 - Big Guy
If something started sucking on your tit, would you take it off and then raise it and grow it to its full form? Only a mother would do that type shit, boy. That's some next level. That's some next level behavior mothers out there. With your ass, too. A lot of kids never washed their ass. We had a buddy. His legs just knew his pants so well. He wore the same pants always.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#581 - Big Guy
Amen, man. Yeah, there's a song. There's a song by this guy, Stephen Wilson Jr. Thank you for that call. And thank you to the caller previously, too. And thank you guys for both sharing your experience with loss. Yeah, there's this song, Grief. Is that by Stephen Wilson Jr.? And it's grief is only love that has nowhere to go. And And I thought about that.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#581 - Big Guy
I thought about that since that gentleman called in. Because love is this feeling that it has to land on someone or an object. It has to land on something, right? Like a person, place. Love has to have a place to land if you love. Like you can love yourself, but that's more like integrity and confidence. And then it can even drift into ego or whatever. But when you really love, you love someone.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#581 - Big Guy
you know? And so love is really, it's an outward thing. It's, it's not, it's yours, but it's, if it's active, it's not yours. It's, it's a, like a bridge almost kind of. And then, yeah, once that recipient is gone, once that place where it was landing is gone, it's like, it almost becomes,
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#581 - Big Guy
it's crazy that something that is so wonderful can become so painful because then you have all these same feelings, but they don't have the place to land. Um, yeah, I remember when my father died, I remember I just, I was at his funeral and it was like the most like scariest thing ever. There was people there that I didn't even, I didn't know any of them. And, uh, my name, um,
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#581 - Big Guy
this family that I just moved in with, the dad took me over there and, uh, and some of our neighbors went with me. And I just remember like, uh, it was all these feelings that I think I didn't even know that I'd had that I wanted to be for my father. And I didn't even know I had them. And now it was just like, they were, they hit a dam, you know, they just would never have a place to go.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#581 - Big Guy
And I just remember like just so much tears and like crying. And like, it would be like going into the cracks of the floor. And I just wanted to, I just wanted to be one of those tears. I wanted to just disappear. Um, Let's take some other calls, man. And we're not trying to make – I guess it can't help but be sad, but I think it's real, right? And it's real.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#581 - Big Guy
Life is real, and it's full of real things. And I'm just glad we don't have to go through them alone. So that's a nice thought to have right now.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#581 - Big Guy
And so you knew good and well so nobody was washing his ass, boy. Not a chance. Even his mom. And she tried. You see her warm up some water on a stove in a stove pot and pull his pants back and just dump it right down the back of his pants. Hoping to even get a half wash or quarter wash on his ass with that warm water. But damn, your mother, our mothers did that.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#581 - Big Guy
And yeah, you know, it's funny. Thank you. Sorry, I'm belting. I had a little bit of Celsius. Thank you for the call, man. Yeah, I remember my dad. One of the only things I remember he said to me ever in my life was that I was a survivor. He used to always say that you're a survivor. And maybe he knew that because he was so old that it would be something that I would need. I don't know.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#581 - Big Guy
Plus, Visible runs on Verizon's 5G network for great coverage, fast speeds, and a seamless connection. And it's all digital. Don't like going to the phone store? Visible doesn't have them. You switch from your phone and manage your plan in an app. Now that's a hack. If you're ready for wireless that lets you live in the know, make the switch at visible.com. Plans start at $25 a month.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#581 - Big Guy
But it's like one thing that I... just feel like, you know, or relate to or something. Um, you know, like I'm going to get through this, I guess, you know? So I think that's really magical that when you act out something that somebody who loves you told you you were, when you do those things, um, that you are kind of servicing that relationship that's no longer there.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#581 - Big Guy
You know, like if she says that where you said this part,
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#581 - Big Guy
And yeah, I could totally see that, man, that by then teaching that you feel like you're honoring her and it makes you feel that same way that you felt when she told you it was something that you did really well. Um, Yeah. It's interesting how we figure out how to, how to keep going in the world, all of us.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#581 - Big Guy
And that we want to, that's one thing that I think is amazing about life is this will to survive, right? It's like you have a man that lost his daughter and he's, you know, and there's, It's like he wants to go and at least wake up and see the day every day because, you know, probably through his eyes, his daughter somehow gets to see the day as well.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#581 - Big Guy
You know, I think there's just something in us that wants to survive so much. And I don't even know what to say about that or what I think about that thought. But thank you for that call, man. Thanks for sharing that. All right. Let's take one more call.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#581 - Big Guy
Hey, Tyler. Thank you for calling, dude. Cincinnati over there. Will the Bengals have a decent defense? I don't know. All the money's on the offensive side of the ball. It feels like if they let Trey Hendrickson go. Now, with that said, is it a Joe Burrow make or break year? We'll see about that, baby. Onward, brother.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#581 - Big Guy
All right. Yeah. Thank you for that suggestion, man. I know there's a lot of grief books out there and stuff, but it's just like, how do you go through it? Yeah. It's interesting. The young man who called earlier, the first code, the original call was saying that he felt like he got left behind. Yeah, it's all kind of fascinating, even though it's so sad.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#581 - Big Guy
And when we couldn't read, imagine you sitting there with somebody, right? And they can't read. You know, and you got to teach them to you start with the first letter and you show them that. And it's a picture of like an alligator and a little kid and the mom's like, what's that? And he's like, lizard, lizard or whatever. He can't even say shit. He don't even say nothing.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#581 - Big Guy
The other day, this came up on my feed when I was thinking about grief. And it's Jim Carrey once said, or this site attributes it to him. Grief is not just an emotion. It's an unraveling, a space where something once lived but is now gone. It carves through you, leaving a hollow ache where love once resided. In the beginning, it feels unbearable, like a wound that will never close.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#581 - Big Guy
But over time, the raw edges begin to mend. The pain softens, but the imprint remains. A quiet reminder of what once was. The truth is you never really move on. You move with it. The love you have does not disappear. It transforms. It lingers in the echoes of laughter and the warmth of old memories in the silent moments where you still reach for what is no longer there. And that's okay.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#581 - Big Guy
Grief is not a burden to be hidden. It's not a weakness to be ashamed of. It is the deepest proof that love existed. That something beautiful once touched your life. So let yourself feel it. Let yourself mourn. Let yourself remember. There is no timeline. There is no right way to grieve. Some days will be heavy and some will feel lighter.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#581 - Big Guy
Some moments will bring unexpected waves of sadness while others will fill you with gratitude for the love you were lucky enough to experience. Honor your grief, for it is sacred. It is a testament to the depth of your heart. And in time, through the pain, you will find healing, not because you have forgotten, but because you have learned how to carry both love and loss together.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#581 - Big Guy
Man, that's pretty powerful. Yeah, whenever I had heard that quote, that, yeah, that grief is only love that has no place to go. It's a great song, too, by Stephen Wilson Jr. I don't believe that the quote is his, but it's a great song.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#581 - Big Guy
Yeah, like you have memories and sometimes even just telling a funny story about someone that's gone can almost make you have the same feeling as if they are still alive sometimes. But... Yeah, thank you guys for – anyway, listening to that, I know some of that stuff is kind of heavy and stuff to think about. But it's nice to take moments to think about people and just hear what – just be alive.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#581 - Big Guy
Yeah, it's nice to just be alive. Yeah, I don't mean that. I just mean it's – I don't know what I mean. Anyway. Yeah. Thank you everybody for who made some calls and called in. Uh, there was a lot of nice calls and suggestions and we tried to put some together there. Um, You know, I wanted to say something.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#581 - Big Guy
There's been something that's just been kind of on my heart, and so I feel like I should bring it up. There is – you know, we've had people on the podcast in the past to talk about it. And there's just a – there's a conflict that's been happening in the Middle East. People know about it. between Israel and Palestine and some of the areas over there, the Gaza area they talk about.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#581 - Big Guy
And I just think it's, it feels to me, I don't know if I, it just, it feels to me like it's a genocide that's happening while we're alive here in front of our lives. And I don't, Sometimes I feel like I should say something. I'm not a geologist or geographer or anything like that. So I don't know a lot of the – some of it I do know though. Like I know the basics of the issues over there.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#581 - Big Guy
He just look at you and try to cop a quick hit off that tit. That's a dumb child. We were all dumb child. My mother helped us out of that. Out of that cavern of knowing nothing. God. They did a lot of work. And then even on some, once you were in school when you had to go to school and take a test. And you was, you was dumb, buddy. You was damn dumb. You was a dumb child.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#581 - Big Guy
But for me, it's just like how I feel like you see all these photos of people – just children, women, people, body parts, just people like putting their kids back together. And I just can't believe that we're watching that and that more isn't said about it. And so I'm not saying anyone else needs to say anything, but I think I'm just that more isn't said about it by me.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#581 - Big Guy
So I just, I want to be able to speak up about that, that I think we're watching probably like, you know, one of the sickest things that's ever happened. And, uh, and I'm sorry if I've kind of haven't said about it, I've tried to talk about it and learn about it. Um, but I don't know, maybe I just want to, I just wanted to say something.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#581 - Big Guy
I don't even know what to do, you know, and it's crazy because our country is also complicit in, in, you know, it's, uh, in, in it and has been for a long time. And, um, And it's just kind of interesting because then you just realize, oh, well, I'm just a – yeah, I'm a member of this country, but I'm just – what we want sometimes doesn't matter.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#581 - Big Guy
And you just have to be a member of a place, and your government is making other choices. Yeah. So I don't know if I've, I don't know if I said that correctly or I don't even know exactly what I said, but I just, I just have, it just like been making me really sick. And I feel like I just needed to say something that I think you don't have to think that I'm not asking you to do anything.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#581 - Big Guy
Um, but I just have to say that. So I'm not sitting by You know, there's that peace inside of you. I mean, like, why wouldn't you, can you say something? You know, there's people that can't even speak and you can say something, you know? And so that's how I just had to just speak up. Anyway, I think maybe it's starting to make it about me there at the end, but yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#581 - Big Guy
So just praying for those people and just the grief that that is all going to cause. You notice like, what are we doing? And I know that this has happened to other ethnicities and other cultures. I know that it's happening to other places too. I just don't see that as much. And so, yeah, anyway. Anyway, that was kind of a downer ending. But big guy.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#581 - Big Guy
So Mother's Day is a good day to just be reminded to love people, whether it's your mother or a kid or a puppy or a little alligator, whatever you got over there. you know, even if it's a memory, you know, get a picture out of somebody that was a member of your life or that loved you and spend a few moments with them, you know, or that's what I'm going to try to do.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#581 - Big Guy
You know, I got a couple of pictures of my dad. I think there's a couple of memories that I keep of him that are like, that are just mine. It feels like, you know, um, Yeah, there's a couple of memories of him that I feel like are just mine. And so, yeah, I can just, you know, I can, you can spend time with those.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#581 - Big Guy
You're the only two people that have those in the world is you and that other person. So that's a really, that's one of a kind. So that's really something cool that you can do. But anyway, this is getting long. Happy Mother's Day. Thanks for letting me be a part of your life today. Thanks for being a part of my life today. And I don't even know how to end this, what to do.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#581 - Big Guy
I don't even have any music on today. So big day. Yeah, big day. Uh, but yeah, anyway, quit listening to me. Text your mom. Even if you hate her, text her and be like, Hey ma, love you. And then just send a wink emoji after it. That's how you look. Hey, it's a start, right? Uh, you guys be good to yourself, baby. Praise God. Thank you. Oh, and Easton, thank you so much.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#581 - Big Guy
Easton for helping us out today. Dude came over. We never even met. We never even met. What are you getting your mom for mother's day? Easton.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#581 - Big Guy
Dude, the craziest is when you buy something to your siblings, right? They picked it out. They show up with it. Mom opens it. She likes it, but you don't fucking like it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#581 - Big Guy
That's crazy. That's like, dude, that's one of the, that's guy, that's why being a mom has to be so crazy. Something crawls out of your body, right? Hangs out in the kitchen for probably 15 years, right? Um, and basically, I don't even, sorry, I don't, there wasn't an ending to that, but, uh, yeah, dude, that would be the thing.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#581 - Big Guy
Somebody got my mom, one of those boat in a bottle thing, ship in a bottle. You know what I'm talking about?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#581 - Big Guy
Yeah. We all gave my sister some money and she was going, she was, she'd been using or whatever, or mountain climbing or whatever she called it. But she, um, we gave her the money. She shows up. We each gave her like 80 bucks. She shows up. She was to have something nice for mom. She got her one of those fucking ship in a bottles dog. No change with it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#581 - Big Guy
And your mother still hugged you and said you're going to do good on it. I remember my mom would be like, you can do great on your test. I'd look at her like, I am? Yeah, you're going to do great. And I would leave out the door and I'd peek back in the window. You could see her just shaking her head like, he's going to fuck it up.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#581 - Big Guy
Like, bitch, give me that fucking change, bitch. Come on, big guy. All right, man. Thank you, Easton, bro. Much obliged. Appreciate you. And make sure to check out Net Positive with John Crist and Easton on there. And you guys be good to yourselves, baby.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#581 - Big Guy
Now I'm just floating on the breeze And I feel I'm falling like these leaves I must be I'll share this peace of mind I found I can feel it in my bones But it's gonna take
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#581 - Big Guy
But that's crazy to send something, know something is going to not do well on a damn spelling or whatever it's called. And send it out in the world and still hug it. And pretend like when they get back, how'd you do? You fucking know good and well how they did, mom. They didn't do shit, boy. They didn't do shit, bro. Opening pants. Another batch of warm water on that ass. It's spring cleaning.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#581 - Big Guy
Mother's Day, man, that's what it is. And that's what it ain't, man. Yeah, I want to say happy Mother's Day to my mother. I know she watches this show and I appreciate that. Man, happy Mother's Day to all the moms out there. The ones that do it by themselves. And some of y'all have help. Yeah, it's just this. We know you're doing it. Somebody's doing it. And it ain't us. It ain't us children.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#581 - Big Guy
We think we did it ourself. We didn't do shit. So make sure to reach out to your mother. Hit her with a happy Mother's Day. Get her something. We got one of our commercials. They got a good advertising of something beautiful. You get her some good items or something. Break her off something. Get your mother something. Drive over there. Give her a hug, boy.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#581 - Big Guy
Keep your hands off that breast, though, boy, you of age, you know. You of age, because that's always the craziest. You see them nine-year-old at the basketball game, and he over there. And he up under his mother wearing a triple XL men's polo shirt just so that kid can get up under there and knobble off on that tit. And he fucking nine, bro.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#581 - Big Guy
Dude, I remember they had this one kid, Lil Bubby was his name, and he would go slip up under his mom's shirt. His mom, I don't know if she was in a wheelchair. She was just, just, just, just not, you know, kind of looked like she was in a wheelchair type shit. And she had them crazy breasts, them kind. It looked like they cracked open and were kind of flooding out. Like them bitches was crazy.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#581 - Big Guy
For our best features, get the new Visible Plus Pro plan for $45 a month. Terms apply. See visible.com for plan features and network management details. Mother's Day is right around the corner. And if you're undecided on what to get mom, maybe some flowers or a nice meal that she doesn't have to cook is just the break she needs. But for a limited time, use code Theo50.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#581 - Big Guy
I don't even know if they are. At a certain point, it was like she had them just got. Damn them thang, boy. She had them fucking beanbag. She had them. She had them damn. You know what I'm saying? She could find somebody take a break right between her breasts. You find two men, two factory workers over between her breasts. getting a nap in and betting on the horse racing.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#581 - Big Guy
Because she had them big break time tits, boy. She had them damn baby bags. She had a fucking damn cow walk up and try to feed off of them bitches. She had them front end loaders on her. What were we talking about? What were we talking about, Easton? Mother's Day. Mother's Day. That's it, man. That is it. Sorry, I went off on a tangent.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#581 - Big Guy
Oh, but I remember they had this kid, LaBubby, and he would go over by his mom. He'd get him a damn candy bar and get up under that shirt and get on that tit. You'd see him in there. He'd have to pop his head out to catch more breath, to catch more air. He'd be like... He'd stick his head out. And then back under there, candy and then tit, candy and then tit.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#581 - Big Guy
Under there, damn nine years old, brother. You're going to do good on your test, son. No, we ain't. That kid's damn dumb, baby. Happy Mother's Day. Oh, I don't know what I'm going to get my mother. Well, I'll get my mother some, I'll send her a card. And I sent that thing on Monday, boy. So it's going to be there. Because for years, I'm that guy sending that late card, you know.
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#581 - Big Guy
I send that bitch, she'll get that bitch on Father's Day, she gets that bitch. And she did both jobs anyway, so they should make that. They should make that Mother Father's Day card, the two-in-one hitter now. They should get that thing released out there. Because you've heard me say it before, man, the hardest working man I've ever met is my mother. Big facts.
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#581 - Big Guy
Happy Mother's Day to you and to your mothers. Make sure to get that love line. Hit her with that love line. Do something. Get over there. Tickle her. You know what I'm saying? Buy her a bra that says keep out on it and honor those words because you're too tall to be titting. You know that shit. Type shit, boy. What's going on? Feeling a little injured today? I picked up something at the gym. Bam.
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#581 - Big Guy
Injured. Didn't even... And it was that kind of thing where your back locks up in your lung like that. Just where you, it's like the wind got knocked out of your back and you know, and your friend's like, what's going on? And you're like, you can't even talk at you.
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#581 - Big Guy
you just, so, I just left, I don't know what they thought, I had cancer, whatever, but yeah, injured myself, um, went to the massage place over here, and I go to the Chinese shop over there, that chop shop, it say right on the sign, chop shop, you know, and they selling fucking rice right out the back of that bitch, boy, They'll remodel your spinal column.
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#581 - Big Guy
They'll fucking unjangle that bitch and then hit you with that damn two grams of rice when you roll out the door. They got that shit in there. And whenever I go get that massage at the Chinese place, I ask for the big guy. I want big guy. When I call him on the phone, he knows me. My buddy Yang over there, I call him on the phone. He said, you coming? I said, big guy. You got big guy?
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#581 - Big Guy
Sometimes he got him, sometimes he don't. Because I've had this second string. They said, big guy. Big guy gone. Big guy gone. That's what he said. I don't know what he meant. But I think he was trying to say big guy gone, right? And I spot him a letter if he ain't got it all, bro. He from another country, you know? That's the kind of guy I am. I'll fucking give you a vowel. Big guy gone. Gone.
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#581 - Big Guy
That's right, Theo50 to get 50% off up to a $15 value when you spend $15 or more at local florists, convenience, grocery, and retail stores on DoorDash. And starting May 9th through Mother's Day weekend, your flowers order will unlock credit towards select gifts that take cooking, planning, and more off mom's plate. Make this Mother's Day special with DoorDash. Code Theo50. Terms apply.
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#581 - Big Guy
I got you. I got you with that E, twin. So, yeah. He said, big guy gone. So I went in there and they had a second big guy in that bitch, bro.
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#581 - Big Guy
the second, and he ain't that big, bro, he kind of, he just, he trying to, like, make his neck long, just trying to look big or something, you know, he put on mittens and shit, because Asian, they try to trick you when you're looking at them, they trick you, they, visual, they're the fucking, they're the bok choy David Blaine's, baby, them bitches are fucking They trick you, bro.
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#581 - Big Guy
They'll put a piece of rice over each eye and tell you they sleeping. That's who they are. They tricks just like that. But I said, big guy. He said, big guy gone. But I showed up anyway. I took that second, that fucking other big guy, bro. And he wasn't shit. This little motherfucker, this little fucking woodpecker. He couldn't do shit. He would fucking hammer, just trying to hammer on me, bro.
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#581 - Big Guy
He just put one of his arms out and was just like that. Just woodpecker me with that elbow. Didn't do shit. I'm fucking still hurt. But anyway, what else? Big gay. I want big gay. Dude, I'll tell you this, bro. So one time I'm in there and I was getting a massage at this other joint. I went to this other joint and I'm in there, bro.
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#581 - Big Guy
And I do the massage where it's like this chair thing that you sit kind of forward on. Easton, can you bring that up for me, brother? And we're borrowing Easton today. He's helping us produce and blessings to you, man. And Easton works on John Chris's podcast. What's it called?
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#581 - Big Guy
Net Positive with John Chris, if you want to tap in with him. What did I ask Easton, do you remember?
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#581 - Big Guy
Get that massage chair, that forward leaning. Let's go with that. Oh, yeah. Yeah, that's the kind they have right there. They put your face in a little, it's like a little soft little toilet seat. But it's soft. But it's little. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Put your face on that. And then they just start getting at you. Anyway, so yeah, I'll go in. He's got one of those chair massagers.
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#581 - Big Guy
So I sit in there and be gay. Be gay. Big guy here. Big guy gone. Big guy here. Big guy starts rattling on me doing his big guy shit. Fucking leaving sweat on my back. I can feel it. Every now and then I know he's really popping back there. If I feel a bead of sweat hit my fucking neck. So he back there popping, right? And then I look over. Dude, in the chair next to me, there's a kid sitting.
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#581 - Big Guy
Getting a massage, right? For, I didn't even, I didn't know this could happen, right? It's like a, this kid looked kind of like the Rizzler, right? Like probably nine year, maybe nine. And like kind of Ruben-esque, you know, chubbish or whatever they call it. This chubbish little kid. And there's a guy just like, just like, just rubbing over, just like massaging him.
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#581 - Big Guy
you know, and I didn't know a kid could get them. I didn't know. And I'm like, am I watching like a, like, what am I watching? Like, is this a kid getting a massage or is this like a, like, is it legal or, you know, I just didn't know, uh, Yeah. I'm like, and like, how long do you watch? It's just a massage. Like if, you know, but yeah, this kid, but it was so crazy.
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#581 - Big Guy
This kid was getting a massage. Like this kid got a massage or was getting a massage, this kid. So they're massaging a kid. It's during the school day. So I'm like, what is, you know, what rich little kid skipped school to get a fucking massage, bro. Then anyway, so we're sitting there and at some point somebody did a fart, you know, somebody did. And I think it was this kid. Right.
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Oh, do you see that thing with the mayor? Do you see that thing with the mayor of New York? No. Oh, dude. Oh, yeah, this is it right here. Do you see this? So Eric Adams, he teaches. What was he saying? They're teaching kids how to.
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God only knows. I'll tell you this, man. Those DoorDash people see some shit. Oh, God, dude. You know, in India, they have a cast of people called the Untouchables.
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Yeah. If you're not going to go as hard as possible. What do you guys see on the cameras? And did you guys ever catch anybody having sex or anything like that?
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Oh, yeah. That's one vote for Trump right there.
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Yes. You just can't fuck with them. Wow. You can't go near them. You see them, and you look away. Uh-uh. That is kind of. Don't take offense to this. But it is when I encounter a food delivery person in the wild, I look away. No. I will look away. Tim, you don't feel like you're one of them? A food delivery person? No. Yeah. There's so many other jobs.
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For sure. So the company starts growing. Right. And in addition to people helping each other get jobs, people were helping each other. People were starting relationships on there. I went on dates off of Craigslist before, you know. I mean, I would use casual encounters, too. You know, it's like that was sometimes I met a girl one time and we watched a Nets game and made love, honestly.
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And she let me sign her cast. Right. And I was like, you know, and it was we had a great time. I think we I think we dated.
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Yeah, I know. Who wants to be a Nets fan?
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He went to... North Carolina. Yeah.
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But he is a volunteers fan. He says he played at North Carolina. He didn't. But... He's a liar and a cheat. True, but he's handsome. It is true. And he is extremely unique. You guys are similar, I think. You guys would have a really nice time. You think? Yeah.
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You guys both have blue eyes.
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have you been married before no no it's your first marriage yeah i was with i've had three really long term relationships i had already felt so fucking terrible about cheating on girls i always got caught inevitably i got caught and those were the like i can remember those phone calls trying to explain why it didn't you didn't care was there anything worse than that oh my god
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Well, it's tied with driving to someone's apartment to tell them that you're breaking up. I mean, those, those two for me are like, I've had a lot of motorcycle injuries. I'd take them a million times before I'd ever drive to someone's apartment and just say like, I think we're in different places. Yeah.
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And they're like, no shit. Sometimes I have a tough time feeling proud of myself. Do you know what that, you know? And I think I've had other people call in our, our show that have talked about that, you know? What do you think it is? I don't know. I feel like I almost feel like it's just that there's a disconnect. Like it doesn't even land on me.
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Or I feel like maybe if I feel like I'm proud of myself, like if I actually feel proud of myself. it'll go against some script that I've always had written or some thing that was always written inside of me. You know, it's like, it's almost like it wouldn't, if I wrote on the wall of myself, I'm proud of you. It wouldn't even fucking show up on the wall.
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They're teaching parents how to search your kid's room to find drugs and gun stuff.
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Like what emotion would I feel if I saw wood?
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No, I think I'd feel ashamed of myself for even thinking it.
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Oh, yeah, dude. Fuck, we cry on you every week. Sorry, dude.
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No, it's okay. But, yeah, we don't have any shame about that.
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All this Diddy stuff going on, man. What are you doing?
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You never got into the, you never were in his universe. Right. But never went out. Right. Is it scary when people get to a level of wealth that they can kind of have anything like, what are some of that?
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Dude, I remember when I first got a clean lady to come once a week, I helped her like the first month.
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I just feel like if you're delivering DoorDash, I just inherently... Here's the thing. I love them as a person. They're a child of God. Yeah. But they're in so much pain. A lot of times you can see they're in pain. I can't see. Really? They're just listening to Scott Stapp usually. I don't feel like. I think some of them are in pain. They're just, it's tough.
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This fucking dude. Now, this could be easily an actor.
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He's got Chew in, too. Big old dip. He's got Chew stuck in his neck.
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And he had a gun, right? I'm going to call this dude out. Go do something, dude. Yeah, what are you doing? You're pointing at him for two minutes. What are you fucking just finishing a beer? Fucking 50 feet away. God gives you one chance to be a fucking hero. And instead, you pop open another fucking bush light, dude.
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This is a fucking backup, dude. They got this dude off of Teemu, this announcer. Look what he's even using to interview him.
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What is the current immigration policy? Is that a fair question?
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So why do people not want to use the pathways, the legal pathways to immigration?
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You're my mother's absolute favorite, dude, just because this is why. She's probably never heard any of your music, but because you say what you want to say.
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Dude, you know what? I think that's really true about you. Cause sometimes I think some things you say, I'm like, it seems like the, sometimes I'll be like, that seems kind of outdated, but the truth is just the times have changed.
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Crazy, dude, just because, like, I mean, obviously, like, so many people tell you all the time, just, you know, Dr. Feelgood, just so much of just, like, I mean, my brother would beat me, beat me to you guys' music. That's crazy. Yeah, I was the drum, dude, I was a snare for my brother, and it was awesome, but it was loving, you know, like...
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How bad was it, like, when addiction hit you guys' band and stuff? Was that pretty crazy?
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It's a hard, I just, it's hard for me to see and look at. It's just hard for me to look at.
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And we got a love fella in the house today, Riley Mao. How are you, brother? Doing well. Have you blasted that corn stalk yet? You popped that corn stalk or what's going on with you, daddy? How's the love life, Bubba? Get us the latest, man.
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This motherfucker... Bro, that's the most New Orleans shit ever. Somebody takes a life insurance policy out for $700, bro. Just for what? To make it their truck payment. Yeah. That's the fucking most New Orleans shit, bro.
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What do you say when he sits you down? I'll put them through hell, bro.
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And that pissed you off even more.
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Oh, and just mill around? Like a loitering, they call it. Yeah, yeah. I think you guys, loitering must be a British thing, huh? Because we wouldn't say that, loitering. What would you say? We'd be like, oh, yeah, stalking. Well, stalking is more like once you've loitered and you see something in the window, you know. You see something. You see a bit of tits in the distance or something.
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But, yeah, that's stalking. Yeah, yeah. And then it's breaking and entering, you know. And then it's marriage, usually. If you have a way with words, I think. Here's a couple of Viettes right here. Bring them up. And this is Yawn Mare. Damn, this fucking kid is ripping, bro. Full allowance this week. God damn, yeah, yes.
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This kid could also be 40 years old, dude. We don't know what's going on, bro. Unreal if that's a real person and not AI.
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The kids aren't going to remember this fucking guy. Dude, most people can't even see that far. How far can people see usually? What do you mean? I'm just saying, like, how far can somebody see? What does that mean? The average sight distance for a person with normal vision is about three miles. Get fucked, dude.
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No, so you met up with the girl?
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When standing on a flat surface with their eyes about five feet above the ground, that is bullshit. I thought it was like 70 feet or something. Why are you asking this question? I'm not sure exactly, I guess. What were you, we were just talking about David Spade, Average Reed. I just got a Cybertruck too. Oh, you were telling me that. Yeah. You got it?
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How is it? It's wild, bro. I mean, for one, you feel like you kind of work at Lowe's kind of a little because it feels like you're supposed to be like delivering something to somebody, but you never drop it off. What do you put back there? I don't know. It's just the whole car feels a little bit like an appliance.
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So it feels like sometimes somebody's just going to open up the back and just put a TV dinner in it. Or just put a load of laundry in there and just press a button. It has an appliance-y kind of feel, but then it makes this sound when you go fast and it literally feels like you're going into the future. Nice. And some people don't know what it is.
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Like there was a guy who like, I don't know if he was homeless or not, but he just, he just seemed really homeless.
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You know? And then he just kind of started yelling at it and just cracked a beer open. And I was like, God, man,
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Oh, it's the largest Pomeranian you can have if you're a woman, is a gay husband. Yeah, I like that. That's what I said.
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I'm willing to date a nice black girl. Yeah, yeah.
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Just tall, kind of. Yeah. Had some booty on her, bruh. Yeah, I knew that. I knew that. And some of the titty went into the booty. I was like, damn. This a whole. I'm trying to imagine that. It was just a. God damn.
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I mean, she looked like the letter S, bro. Yeah, yeah. And she was really pretty eyes, nice, soft-spoken, looked at me twice. Yeah, yeah. One time I hung around for a long time for the second look. Yeah. But it still counts. It was getting weird at that point. It still counts, but yeah, it was a little weird. It was getting weird, yeah.
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And I waved and I walked off, bro, and the wave was what fucking fucked me up.
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Y'all got to meet him. None of that turn back the clock shit.
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I'm a modern day soldier, brother.
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I'm saying, like, be assertive. 2012 and up, bro. Yeah, 2012 and up assertive, right? You're fine as hell. You are beautiful. Yeah. And I would like to see you soon.
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Y'all have to be back. You get what I'm saying?
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You have to be back. Yeah, what's your kiddo like? I don't know if I. She's a stud. Oh, it's a baby. It's a girl. Were you there when she was born? I pulled her out of the coochie. No, you didn't.
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I mean, that's... Did he know that you were there with her?
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Close-toed shoes. I think that's what God wants. Yeah, you have to. Anybody that wears open-toed shoes to their child's birth is obviously, first of all, a Jimmy Buffett fan.
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yeah oh so he rode in right and um okay so he shows up now what do you do are you posturing a little or what happened are you um i'm just chilling you know i'm sitting next to her and everything's going great um and i get up to use the bathroom and once i get back he's normal dude gonna make toilet that's normal go on and uh he's in my seat next to her What the F? A white guy?
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Oh, that's amazing. The child has filed emancipation papers.
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You can see him right there begging for a sip. Yeah, he's in. That's Deep Roy, isn't it? That's Deep Roy. That's not a child. That's Deep Roy. And Roy's getting, look at her. She's just beyond. This is a new headshot. This new headshot.
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By the way, Deep Roy has pretended to be an infant. Is this going to be a newspaper article? Whitney Cummings' baby was actually deep-rooted.
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I wouldn't be surprised. There's a lot of... Look, things are getting so tough out there. Little people are going undercover. They just had the Russian girl who faked with the family to be able to eat and survive.
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So they're just going to have to... And Whitney, because Whitney... She's busy? She's busy. That's the thing with Winnie. She's a great mom and everything, but she's busy. She's got a lot going on, so she might not notice if her son is deep-roiled. She might not notice if she's got deep-roiled. Oh, you got a fucking young baby who's just in an Elvis outfit?
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She might like how quickly he's growing and, like, she might be like, my baby's so impressive, he's speaking. He's speaking Hindu. He's speaking Hindu. He's dressed like Elvis.
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Sorry, just do it like me? I don't know.
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No, no, no. You're you. Okay, got it.
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I don't know what country we're in.
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Who gives a fuck? Well, give me a setting then.
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Hey Chucky. What's up? I don't know. The people don't even get thought of anymore. It feels like a lot of times. And here's the toughest part. I think Bernie is as a person who, you know, has felt like in their life, maybe their father died in a war, their grandfather died in a war and they've been tried to pay their taxes and be a, you know, considerate person in their town or their country. Um,
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After a while, those good people start, it starts to erode a little because they don't feel like, and they lose their sense of purpose. Man, when you lose the fabric of your society, a lot of people, that's how they, they didn't even realize it. A lot of us don't even realize that we identify as an American.
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And when you realize, well, America, it's nothing, but it's a, it's a shell LLC for fucking big corporations. Then what am I? I'm just a, I'm just a idiot, you know, and you almost feel ashamed of yourself, you know, or you can, you know, anyway, just, I don't know.
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A lot of that stuff just, I just don't see how people think that that's good or how you're going to still be able to get people to buy in.
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Well, even the radio, like you're saying, it's like you used to have like a newspaper and you read and it meant something. Your community meant something. It used to be that- Your grandpa worked at the factory and they made the table that you have in your home. And so everything had a story to it. There's some connection. And now it's like we're buying stuff from countries that they're making it.
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They don't care. We're using it. We don't care. There's no story. Nobody has any like there's no. There's no thread. You know, the thread just gets thin. That's a very profound point you just made. And so how do we get it back, you know?
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Oh, sweet. And he loved it. Did you ever fly with him?
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I saw where you had your mom was out and you congratulated her on she almost has 10 years of sobriety, you said. That's right. Yeah, she's in January, January of 2025. She will be 10 years clean and sober. What was it like growing up like with an alcoholic mother? Like no judgment against your mother. This is just to look at it. Right. Yeah, sure. I appreciate that. Yeah. What what is that like?
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Like, is it hard to make a connection with your mom? Like, what are some of the side effects of that on a child?
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The Marines, that was the original Ozempic.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
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There's a lot of Asians for Trump out there. Do you know that? How do Asians feel about Trump? Let's say it, man.
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A lot of the black girls in our town and stuff would get knocked up by the black guys at a young age. Yeah. So all of our black girls disappeared at around 13 years old and got pregnant. Yeah. And then they come back and they're just different or they just like, yeah, they have a child now or they have like baby milk on their shoulder or whatever.
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You're like Kim Jong-un. No, I'm not Kim Jong-un. You're like a smaller, like scam Jong-un. Yeah, yeah, yeah. There was one lady that covered the Trump thing. I think it was an Asian lady. Do you see the thing? covered the time that we interviewed Trump. This is kind of self aggrandizing or whatever. Oh, here we go.
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And some people are just food, just real creeps when it comes to eating. You know, I've had out, you know, I don't think you can say it or not.
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Well, I didn't. You just did. I didn't have it. You ate an owl? You just said you did, though. Huh?
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I think he said eagle. Yeah. No, I didn't say eagle, dude. And if I did, it was a wigged eagle. I don't eat bald eagles. No, but I did have. We had an owl. My sister grilled up two owls.
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I thought we could say it now.
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There's not a lot to them. That's the trick.
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I didn't inhale. You know, Thanksgiving, it's... It's interesting that even time says, hey, hold on. I need you to give some thanks. I need you to you have to have some gratitude here. You know, and I think that that to me, that's pretty fascinating that that is a speed bump that's been put into our calendar. It's just built in there. You know, it's a comma that says, hey, care, right?
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Care about the things that have happened to you. You know, find things to have gratitude for. And see, I want to think about those today and just things that I'm thankful for. I'm thankful. Yeah, being able to whisper. That's a big one. I'm so thankful for that. Because otherwise, everybody in your family would just wouldn't know how you felt about them.
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What if you fucking, what if you start tripping in your head and thinking that somebody is like, some kid is like plotting.
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Like they were just more advanced. Like the black kids in our school were more sexually advanced. They just had sex earlier and stuff. So I think that was intimidating. The black girls were intimidating because they had more experience. Yeah, it's funny.
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Yeah. You said there's a lot of world records that were broken in the shooting of this series.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
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Yeah. Oh, that's the most people probably since 9-11, I would think.
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We might have to take that out. Yeah. And I shouldn't have said that. I'll say something else. Yeah. I haven't seen that many people. Yeah.
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at the same time wait why was there a cut before you say what you're saying right now huh oh there's just we needed something he had to use the bathroom yeah yeah just had to use the yeah i had already i'd already soiled the conversation uh oh that's the most people at once that i'd seen since um oh since i was in the parking lot of a widespread panic concert you know but that was lsd
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
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Um, that kind of works a little. Yeah.
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You've really taken over America, dude. You've kind of become like a stitch in the American flag. I feel like you're like this thing that everybody feels like they can believe in, you know?
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And you really were praying that?
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Power and prayer. You're going to pay me to go fucking relive my life. Like, if you said, hey, Sean, you want to go hit the restart button? Like, fuck you. Really? Fuck no. The school system's like, oh, Sean, like, he's just a bad kid. They don't realize I'm up until 3 o'clock in the morning. Like, you know, late. I mean, fuck, dude.
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It's hard to stay up late and learn.
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Dude, I remember, like, laying in bed. Like, I remember I stopped believing in God, man. Like, fucking. Like, I had fucking. Yeah, it's crazy shit, dude. Crazy shit, man.
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Yeah. It's okay, man. It's a lot of that sad, dude. I used to be scared at night. I used to stand up. I heard when I was a kid that if you peed around your... Animals could pee somewhere that other animals wouldn't come. You know what I'm talking about? You know what I'm talking about? Have you ever heard that? Yeah, I'm sorry, bud. I'm sorry, buddy. It's all good, dude.
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We don't have to talk, man. I can just sit here with you for a minute.
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Oh, fuck. Oh, fuck. Six seconds.
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I can just sit here. We can just sit here.
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No, it's all good, dude. Six seconds. I'll just process it. I think... Some of the hard things that people don't understand, like trauma, you know?
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Sometimes it just comes out. Oh, no, dude. Like, I remember... I have a hole in my gum... Yeah, when I was a kid, I used to scratch my gum. I'd have a hole in my gum.
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Just from being nervous and stuff?
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Nah, just anxiety, you know? Yeah. Yeah, even to this day. Yeah. I mean, today, dude, like, I'm a grown-ass man. I don't give a fuck. I mean, you could post this.
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I don't care. Oh, dude, I don't have any.
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No, it's all good, dude. I mean, it is what it is, dude. Like, it is what it is. Like, people understand. Like, when I talk about, like, oh, I'd kill a man. It's like you don't understand. You're like, when you go through that level of trauma, like you just view it a little differently.
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Anything new in the dating world? Uh, kinda. Yeah, what you got, you little squirrel buddy?
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And now, Raleigh, at this point, you're still in your...
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ejaculatory uh promissory note with the lord is still intact right correct okay um so what happened did you end up i mean like how did it end dude you know what i'm saying like did you end up you know creaming that little nugget or what happened i did no what riley mal god baby congratulations dude i don't see a lot of that come over here and shake my hand real quick
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I just want to shake the hand of a man that's come recently this year. Congratulations, man. Thank you. Good to see you, brother. All right, go back.
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Well, she was we had a couple of good lunch ladies. We had this one lady we had named Sarge, actually. And she was, I think, a she loved ladies. I'll say that. Oh, yeah. We had this other lady. Miss Moncrief, she'd always be like, make sure to get your spedigetti. That's what she called it. Your spedigetti. Get your spedigetti. So she would yell at us.
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She'd be like, get your spedigetti. And instead of saying cake, she would say like, this is crazy, but she would kind of say like cack. So she'd be like, and get your cut of coconut cack over there.
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It's like, it almost seems like the story before Castlevania starts, like on a video game.
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Dude, Shoney's Inn, bro, I remember for $11, you could stay at the place, right? For $15, you could stay and eat, right? So with that $4 upcharge, you got that buffet. Shoney's had an inn. And we would go, bro. And they also had this, like, premier buffet for, like, two more dollars. You could go. They had, like, this kind of roped-off area of the buffet.
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And down there, they had fucking salmon or whatever, you know, damn special pickles, salmon.
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Yeah, this is the opening menu. Yeah.
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Now, what if a woman came, and I'm talking a lady came over from Texas A&M. I'm talking a lady rides up in a Corvette, Willie. What'd the tits look like? With some of that f***ing, that real, that real. She got some titties, look like two angry dogs trying to chew on your cock. And tell me this, she got that cooter on her, that aggie.
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It was a nice building. They did have a pool at the building. That was pretty cool. And I was learning to play guitar at the time. And so I would go in there. He'd have some, every now and then he'd have a chick stay over and I'd go in there and play. Teasing.
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No way. How was his son? Was he in the military?
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Dude, but I would go in there, and one time after, they would request him to come back in.
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There used to be a show. It was like Amish, something Amish. Yeah. Something Amish. Good show. Something Amish. This one dude kept mowing his grass. He had to use that old school cutter, the spinning thing.
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And he's like, this sucks. I was adopted. I'm not even supposed to be Amish, he said. Yeah.
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Oh, yeah. I roll right in there and tell them I'm racist. What, what t-shirt are you wearing? And last time they're like, we have so many races here today. We still have to ask you guys a couple of questions.
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You ever been in a pyramid scheme? No. I've been in a couple. My buddy won his family's football pool. It was like their NCAA, their college football pool they did every year. He won us like $600, dude. He was so excited he could have changed his life. And instead, his mom convinced him to buy a Christmas village of like rare Christmas village houses. Oh, yeah! They're back.
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It's a functional, like the MyPillow guy. He does crack? He did it his whole life.
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I was going to say probably I wish meth had like a birth control aspect to it. But I would go White Claw.
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You know? Yeah, maybe that's true. I never smoked. I always wanted to smoke crack. I never got to smoke crack. God damn. It's... Did you ever smoke it? Oh, yeah. Really?
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Nipples on her butt cheeks? Wow. How to feel about it. Feel about it with them hands, baby. What are you talking about? Those are extra tits, bro. Now, I wouldn't motorboat them or you're going to end up in some dirty oil. You feel me? But those are extra tits, brother.
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#579 - Mark Zuckerberg
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E552 Vigilante Christmas
economicimpact.com. You know, we read for different financial advertisements on this podcast, and I want to iterate one that I think has become my favorite. It's called Acorns. I love it. It's just a simple tool for helping you learn to save, and it starts to give you different ways to look at money and feel about money. Today's episode is sponsored by Acorns.
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She's breastfeeding some little Rutgers fan or whatever, and he's like, Samantha, get the fuck, get out of here.
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Some guy's got fucking salami grease in his eyes. He can't even see that good. He's all fucking just geeked up on mortadella or whatever.
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And people saying, they're from Africa online. African drones. They'd be paper airplanes, bro. Africa ain't making no drones, bro. They're making soup. They're dealing with different issues, grassroots issues over there. You know, they're making Zambian drones over there. It's probably people like, it's aliens, you know. I don't care what it is. I don't care. Dude, if it's aliens, good.
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Y'all keep talking about them bitches every week. Bring them on. I hope it is something from another world. Hopefully, it's coming to help the Jets, whatever it is. That's all it is. Hopefully, whatever them drones, I hope they go straight over there and help the Jets over there because they could use some support. I know that. The New York Jets could use a damn drone or something.
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On defense, they need it. But yeah, that's what people are saying that the drones over there.
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Gina's inside. She's finishing off a tattoo. She's getting a tattoo on her arm. It's like the third character from Boondock Saints or something on her arm. Or it's some chick from Marist, you know, with a jersey, Mike's brassiere, you know. She's nine mint juleps into the slot and she's figuring things out.
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You know, I just, you know. It's probably one of those frats just dropping pills into people's drinks. That's the way... That's how they're doing it now, ladies. It's the drones. It's probably some pike with a remote on his phone. So I don't know. That's what's going on out there. Um... But yeah, that's what's happening in my world today. That's kind of it. You know, the years happen so fast.
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I feel like I'm not getting enough time to prepare to be to do it. You know, it's almost like you want to finish everything off and do everything. And and then I got to remember, you know, you can only do what you can. Right. You can only do what you can and.
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Instead of trying to make it to five houses in one day on Christmas or Christmas Eve, make it to two or three and spend some quality time there. And say, hey, next year I'll come and see you guys. Or I'll see you at Easter. Or I'll see you here. Or I'll see you the day after. You know, sometimes we try to stack everything on the one day. Yeah, so that's what's happening.
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What else is happening in the news? London's Christmas tree this year is pathetic, this says. Let me see. Ooh, that bitch. Dang, boy. London. The bridge is falling, dude. That bitch going to fall as well, baby. Gosh. Man, that thing. Looks like it got too many vaccines, brother. That thing, wow. London, y'all didn't. You guys must have given all your money to foreign countries as well, brother.
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That thing barely lit up. That thing missing some branches. A bird wouldn't land in that, bitch. I know that. You'd be lucky to find maybe a penguin roll up under it. I bet you couldn't find 60 birds that would live in that, bitch. That thing looks like Section 8 for swans over there. You're missing some branches on it. That looks like when you get one of those haircuts at one of those schools.
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You ever been to the school where they cut it? And they have the person up front. It's his first time. It's like a school. It's a hair school. They had it in our town when I was young. And for 50 cents, they cut your hair. Or they cut it for free if you fucking walked in there. They didn't give a shit. They was just happy. to let any practice on it, right?
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You come out that bitch looking like a damn guy. Everybody, you get like a six year old lesbian. I don't care what you was a male, female, B Sean, anything that put a, I don't care if you was Australian shepherd, you'd look like a damn six year old lesbian in there. They put damn a sideburns on your fucking right on the front of your head.
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Hey, Tuscaloosa, Alabama, and Tallahassee, Florida. Rosemont, Illinois, Winnipeg, and Calgary in the Canada. Get all your tickets at theovon.com slash T-O-U-R. And thank you so much for your support. Put a bow on it. Put a bow on it. That's the end of the year, baby.
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They, they didn't, they didn't know what they was doing in there. I think it was an Aveda Roberts or something it was called. Aveda Roberts Hair Cafe or whatever. You go in there, 50 cents. And it was some dude. He'd been a substitute teacher three weeks earlier at my school. And now he's in here. And he's shaking hands, you know. Hi, I'm, you know, I'm Reginald or whatever.
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And he changed his name and it's Reginald. Bitch, you're Reginald. All right? I don't know. You know, I'll pretend with you for 45 seconds, but you're Reginald from social studies, sir. And then he'd try to trim your shit up or whatever. He'd take you. They'd wash your hair. Dude would try to fucking drown you in there. Drown you in the sink for 50 cents. You'd barely make it out that bitch, dude.
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Just scary to be a part of some of that shit. What were we talking about, Trevon? Do you remember?
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Oh, yeah. So I can relate to, you know, not getting what you pay for there, London, or getting what you pay for. You know, that's what you get, baby. What else do we have? Pornhub will block access for Floridians on January 1st. And I say this, you know, I applaud this. I have friends that work in pornography or that do it and stuff like that, and that's fine.
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This is not a judgment against any of those people or any people that are involved in sex work. But no one in Florida will be able to access Pornhub, the most trafficked pornography website in the world, as of January 1st. And honestly, I think that it's good. You know, I think watching, uh, porno, uh, has, it's not, it's, it makes, for me, it makes a lot of shame inside of me.
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Anytime I'm busting myself out or just, you know, or, you know, doing, you know, anytime I'm just, you know, just LARPing that fricking Ranger or whatever, or just making my body talk and do just, Anytime I'm doing pornography, I don't feel good about myself. That's the truth. I don't feel good about myself. It makes me feel ashamed, kind of. It makes me feel weak.
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It makes me feel ashamed of myself. And those aren't ways that I want to feel. And... I believe it takes away because I've seen this happen with so many of my friends and myself. I think it takes away your desire to connect with the opposite sex, you know, and then like you go home and you don't have the energy for your wife.
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You don't even have the attraction because you you're basically just taking the attraction out of your body. You know, God puts like magnets in our body or mother nature, God or God, mother nature, whatever. She keeps changing her name. I have no idea. But she's probably just hiding, you know, trying to hide from the courts or whatever.
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But she they and God or whatever, they put like a magnet in your body. And that creates the attraction. So when I'm taking all my energy and I'm putting it just into pornos on the internet or whatever, I'm just giving all of my energy, my good, beautiful human nature energy, I'm giving it away. You know? And then it makes me feel ashamed. It makes me feel just... It doesn't make me feel good.
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That's what I'll say. And so I don't want to do that. And so I'm glad that they're starting to crack down and, and not they're starting to, but we, we, we need some help. I think that's what I think. I think we need some help. Yes. People should be able to watch whatever they want or look at whatever they want. But also I don't think we should just let things, everything just be available.
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I don't think so. And some people might say, well, that's like communism or something. I don't know. That's like a restriction. That's fine. Look, I've watched enough porn, uh, porno to know that you don't, you don't need it. Now it's easy for me to say, cause I got to see some of it, but you know, and I'll sit around a fire and tell you what it was like, if that's what you need. But
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But I'm happy – I think we need to go back to the days of drawings. You have to sneak into your brother's room and sneak a drawing of some cooter out from under a fucking aquarium. And it's a little bit wet and it's got some fish flakes on it or whatever on the sketch. But that's how you get it. So I think there needs to be a little more barrier to entry in the sex world. Yeah.
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And look, that's how I feel about it. And that's okay if you feel differently, but I've watched it have an effect on my own life and I, and I'm, I'm glad it won't be as accessible, I think. And that's OK if you feel differently. I'm not saying what I feel is right. And that's OK. But I'm just tired of like I feel like it takes your masculinity is trying to.
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in the books, that's it, wrap it up, they used to have a fella in our neighborhood when I was growing up, and he had affliction, you know, when they, nobody knew what he had, you know, but he had And his daddy kind of had it. Whatever his daddy had, his daddy, you know, it got worse when he had it. When he was born, they're like, damn, he's got it.
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And it's like these systems that use these algorithms against us. It knows that. It knows you're addicted to it. So it's like I'm going to serve you that addiction right here. And it is up to ourselves to be able to prevent ourselves from looking at it. I agree.
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But it's easier for me not to do cocaine if somebody isn't just, if every time I open my window, there's somebody not right there with some cocaine. So that's all I'm saying. This episode is sponsored by PrizePix. Do you love firing on sports? Taking a chance? Well, PrizePix is the best daily fantasy sports app for you. You can sign up today and get $50 instantly when you play just $5.
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E552 Vigilante Christmas
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So where's the best place to buy crypto? That's easy, Kraken. Head to Kraken.com slash Theo. That's www.kraken.com slash T-H-E-O and sign up now. That's Kraken.com slash Theo. This is not investment advice. Crypto trading involves risk of loss and is offered to U.S. customers, excluding Washington, New York, and Maine. through Payward Interactive Incorporated.
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
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Get 20% off in free international shipping when you use code Theo at Manscaped, T-H-E-O. That's 20% off in free shipping with promo code Theo at Manscaped.com. All right, what else do we have here? Oh, people sent in some Cat Williamses right here, and people are finding them everywhere. And that's beautiful. Let's see what they sent in for us. Because you know I got my K-Dub out already.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
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I got him in the living room. That's my little angel. Oh, they put this one right near the Barbies. This Cat William is trying to meet a white girl. Look at this one. A Cat Williams, somebody put. Gang, baby, that's one. And then, whoa, whoa. This one off that Scissor, baby. This one's been sipping, boy. Wow. This one definitely on the clock, hiding at work. I've seen this one before. Dang.
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And I remember at the holidays, they'd put a bow on him. Put a big bow on him and let him be out in the yard and let him pick up some of the driveway gravel. Make wishes on it and throw it over the fence over there by their house. But what are we talking about? Good to see everyone. Merry Christmas to you. Merry Christmas to you. Happy holidays. Happy Black Christmas.
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This one off that Henny, baby. Damn, boy. Let's see one right here. Oh, this one hiding, too. I've seen this one at work, at lunch, hiding out in between a couple boxes or whatever. And this one got a little 8-ball on him, too. What is that 8-ball? No, what is that thing called, Trevin?
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Snow Globe. Thank you. But, yeah, and then this one right here, Sketch sent me this one. There's one. And that's Cat Williams and... That's Cat Williams and Cam Newton hanging out right there. We caught them on the edge of the store over there by the appliance area, air conditioning, HVAC, all that. So they over there mingling or whatever, talking shop. Okay, what else we got?
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We got some more art. TikTok is on the verge of getting banned. The Supreme Court will hear arguments over the law that could ban TikTok in the U.S. if it's not sold. Who's the owner of TikTok? I want to see if he would come on here. I think it's Chow Shane or something. I think it's Chow Shane.
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Yes, Xiao Zichu. Xiao Zichu. Yeah, we got to get him in here because I want to know what the truth is. And I would like to say to you, Xiao Zichu, if you're willing to come on, maybe we would love to have you in here just to learn a little bit about it right here.
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The Supreme Court said it will hear arguments next month over the constitutionality of the federal law that could ban TikTok in the United States if its Chinese parent company doesn't sell it. The law enacted in April set a January 19th deadline for TikTok to be sold or else face a ban in the United States. The popular social media platform has more than 170 million users in the U.S.
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The high court will also hear arguments from content creators who rely on the platform for income and some TikTok users. President-elect Donald Trump, who once supported a ban but then pledged during the campaign to save TikTok, has said his administration would take a look at the situation. Trump met with TikTok CEO Xiaozichu on Friday.
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The case pits free speech rights against the government's stated aims of protecting national security. The government ain't protecting national security. I think at this point we can all recognize they don't really have our security in their sights. You know what I'm saying?
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They let they'll let anybody they don't want somebody getting your information off TikTok, but they'll let somebody just come across the willy nilly come into the country. Willy nilly. And I say that only because we've met with border patrol agents and we've that's the truth. There's no you can sugarcoat it any way you want. So I don't believe that. I believe that they don't want.
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People sharing the truth about the genocide in Palestine, and that's why that they're doing it. I believe that that's what it is. And TikTok is one of those places where people can still do that, and they want to own it. They want to own it, dude.
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Yes, suppressing. Thank you so much. Yes, and I think – yeah. I mean – And people say, thank you. And people say like, well, we don't want China having our information. All these, they all have our, what are they? I don't understand sometimes what that means, you know? Like, what do you have my information? I have like six pieces of information. There's no way you don't have them.
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I've put them into some of the probably shadiest sites on the web. You got them. You know, I don't even, people have our information. What do you, I'm scared they're going to get my DoorDash order. They've got, they have our information. So then it's just what don't they want us to see, right? What don't they want us to see?
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Because if they can control what they, what we see, they'll control what we know. Or what we believe, maybe. I don't know. Do I sound crazy? I don't know. Doesn't matter. While both are – and there's a difference between the TikTok in China and the TikTok in USA.
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While both – it says right here, while both are owned by the same company, ByteDance, TikTok in China called Douyin – Douyin, D-O-U-Y-I-N, Douyin.
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is significantly different from the version available in America, with a much stricter focus on child-friendly content, including educational videos and stricter time limits due to stricter Chinese government regulations regarding online content for minors, whereas the American version is considered more open and has a wider variety of content with less restrictions on viewing time. Okay.
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I know that there's... Some people celebrate that Black Christmas. I don't remember what it's called, and I don't want to offend anyone. But that, you know what I'm saying? That chocolate. That chocolate Christmas, baby. That Hershey's Christmas. You know what I'm saying? Get buck! Get buck! And, um... And they got all the Christmases. And everybody, happy Christmas, merry Christmas to you.
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It's more open as a wider variety. So I understand like they want to keep like the Chinese government probably keeps theirs more informative. And then, you know, America, it's just we like the fat. We like the funny, you know, just like we don't want to learn as much. It's not as much of our nature. A lot of us, you know, we're more tempted by the other stuff.
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And so that's what we kind of consume and enjoy. Yeah. But that seems like a crazy – but I just don't buy the content thing. I just don't buy that they're going to get our information. Are we going to get my shoe size? Are we going to get my address in college or something? You know, what are you going to get? What vitamins I'm taking? What are you going to get?
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That's what – it's like, you know, we don't – they're going to get our – what information? I can't think of anything that I haven't already put into a computer probably. So I think they have our information. But what do I know, dude? I don't fucking know, dude. I'll smoke a bag of my own in nuts, homie. I don't give a shit, boy. I will eat the fucking shingles off your house. Yeah, I will.
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All right. What else do we have? We got some calls that came in. Any more news? Oh, Columbus Funeral Home, the first operating in America with a liquor license. Columbus, Ohio, a north side funeral home could soon serve mourners in a new way. Alcohol. Wow. Welcome to Ireland. That's what we're talking about. Funerals. Evergreen Funeral Cremation and Reception is set to open next year.
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They apply for liquor license and could soon be serving people during services. That's nice. The mission is to make the process of a very difficult time a little easier. My role in this position is to be kind of a party planner for the dead. That's what Hunter Triplett told WSYX.
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Triplett wants to shed the business's reputation of being dark and morbid by offering manageable prices and the option for mourners to raise a toast to a lost loved one with a bar. That's fair. Interesting. We will be serving alcohol when people are on the premises and remain on the premises. Yeah, because imagine that somebody leaves a funeral, car accident, deceased.
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So these people are kind of, I don't know what that's called, double dipping or whatever. It seems like it. So, but hey, that's the kind of America we should, you know. But we got to ban TikTok because it's getting your information out. What else? Oh, New York considering special hotline just for CEOs to report alleged threats to their safety after the Brian Thompson killing.
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For those of you who do not know it. Brian Thompson was the – he was the matriarch or whatever. Brian Thompson – that's not the right word. He was the CEO of UnitedHealthcare, I believe it's called, UnitedHealthcare. He was gone down in the middle of Manhattan earlier this month. And –
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So New York Governor Kathy Hochul is considering creating a special hotline just for CEOs to report alleged threats to their safety. A hotline. That sounds like some CEO is going to call a hotline. I think they know now like they should all they would all call it. Because it feels like they just got they. Now there's no point in the Holland. You got it.
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They there's the threat to the safety is there. You know, somebody had been popping off. Somebody pulled that Draco out on somebody, you know, because they wouldn't do the, you know, they was wrenching somebody's mother over to medical bills and stuff. You knew it was going to happen, I feel like.
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And I feel like this is where we're starting to get in society where you're going to start to see vigilantism. Now, some people can just say it's murder. Some people can say it's vigilantism, right? You know, and it could be both. That's the thing as well. But you're just going to see at a certain point that's going to happen.
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You know, you're seeing people take things into their hands because institutions like the government or won't do it. That's what you're starting to see. You're seeing it everywhere. You know, you started to see it during COVID when Dave Portanoy was handing, they were helping out, they were helping out small businesses while the government, while COVID people were, they were shutting them down.
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So you started to see private people or regular people taking action to do things that you would think that your government would do, right? And I think at a certain point, you would think that your government would keep you safe from toxic insurance programs. And they aren't. Medical debt is the leading cause of bankruptcy in America. So you think about the stress and all that cause.
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And the end of the year is here. I can't believe it. I can't believe that we got the end of the year already. I just remember everything was kind of, it was a crazy year. It started off, you know, shit was weird. And then things got kind of trans or whatever. And then suddenly it's Christmas. And here we are. We have some great Christmas music, too.
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It's horrible. It's horrible. But meanwhile, we have billions of dollars to give somewhere else. It's just fucking people are sick of things. And then you start to see people take things into their own hands that their government should be doing for them. So how do you guys feel about vigilantism or, you know, is that a crazy thing to say? I mean, obviously it is murder. It is a crime.
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So that is no doubt. But sometimes there are crimes that people do because they don't there's no choice. You know, we give that excuse when people rob a Shoney's or whatever. Or you rob a Taco Vespa or whatever. Some guy's selling fucking Mexican off of the back of a damn bird scooter or whatever. Some fucking lime, some fucking little lime monster. You know, slinging that shit, homies.
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But anyway, I'm fucking rambling. I think I'm getting a little bit into the news. But I'm just interested. What do you guys think about vigilantism? Do you think this is just murder? Do you think that we're going to see more of that as time goes on? Yeah, because at some point, if something bends enough, the fucking shit's going to start to get weird. And I like weird shit.
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You know what I'm saying? I like weird shit, bro. I've been involved in some misconnections with the devil, brother. But I love how the government thinks a hotline is going to help. Bitch, that's the same thing you gave to people that were having problems with the insurance company in the first place. You gave them a call a hotline.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
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Motherfucker, his mom, your mom's mom has been on hold with insurance for two hours. Now she got to call another hotline to complain about it. Get fucked. That's what I say, bro. That's what I say. And when people start to realize the truth, bro, shit gets, that's wild. That's what I say, man. Damn, this shit got me agitated.
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And I'm between insurance companies right now, so I better calm down, dude. And that's the truth. I think my new policy goes in on the first or whatever. So anyway, let's get to some calls, man. Sorry I've been rambling. I know I've been kind of vocal about shit, but maybe I'm not sorry. I don't know what I'm doing, dude. I don't know.
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It's been a long year and shit does make me agitated sometimes. I've had three coffees today. You know, I watched a SEC team play football. I'm feeling hyped. We got a video call in right here that came in. As always, the hotline is 985-664-9503. And you can submit videos as well through the website. Here we go.
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Gang, gang. Maybe there's a young kid right there. And if he potties or whatever, if he does pissing or does booty work, they let him say gang gang. And that's beautiful. Praise God. Good to see these young fellas. Right here.
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What's up, Dallas? Good to see, good to hear you, brother. Let's hear more.
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I want to just take a second so we can hear a couple of these tunes. So we have them and just put us in the mood right here today. At the end of 2024 right here, let's hear a little something. And that's Christmas Bells by Mike Franklin. And that's that autism Christmas, baby. That Christism, baby. Let's hear a little more of it. And that's a little bit of Asian Christmas too.
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Okay, brother. Thank you. Yeah. And putting the lights up. I looked into it. It's a little pricey. I looked into it. It's a little pricey. I'd rather just get home and wish they were up for about a month. And then it's January or whatever. But I do feel you. And I get jealous when I see homes that have them up. And if I get a wife next year, I don't work as much. I'm going to put some up.
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But onward, man. I'm sorry I'm making this about me, brother. Let's hear more.
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Yeah, brother. Well, you can't, you know, if you're trying to change the whole mood of a neighborhood, it's going to take time, man. You know what I'm saying? Romano's macaroni grill wasn't built in a day or whatever they say, man. I don't know what that saying is. Onward.
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You got to do a little peep in time and maybe you're right there. You right there, brother. You know what I'm saying? The devil just put you on the windowsill, boy. You elf on a shelf of lust, brother. You got an excuse to be on the ladder. You know how hard it is to climb up that ladder with no excuse to be in someone's yard, brother? And you just tell them you're bird watching or something.
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You're just staring into their fucking window. Yeah, dude, you're getting paid to peep in time, brother. What are you talking about? Change your attitude. Start lurking and slurping, homie. You know what I'm saying? Get tipped out big, dog. You feel me? How much is that doggy in the window? Get over there and get you some, boy. Oh, with that ladder, boy. Get out there, brother.
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You know what I'm saying? Get out there. Slurp, daddy. All right. Let's hear another call that is coming about Christmas.
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Hey, Stephanie from Mississippi over there. And I'll be going to Natchez, Mississippi, actually, for a night to spend time with some family that I used to live with over there. My buddy Richard Sharp, his family. And I'm just blessed to get to see them again. Gang, onward.
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Love you, too. Thank you so much for calling. That's a good question. What do you get an eight-year-old boy? And he's just a boy, probably. I wonder how tall he is. How long is an eight-year-old? Let me look that up really quick. How long is an eight-year-old soccer game? What? That's ridiculous. Who's looking up that shit? It says between 47 and 54 inches tall.
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shit how tall how long is that how much is that 50 feet or sorry 50 inches is four feet okay so we're looking at four feet tall something that's four feet tall what do you get it fuck that's a damn wiener dog it's you know that you got living with you um Yeah. An eight year old. You know what?
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I think there was some things my mom would get us that were fun things, but then she would get us things that were like, um, kind of creative, like thinking things as well. You know, and I really liked that. Like we would get like puzzles or, um, different type of stuff. Clay. Uh, one year we didn't have any money.
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My mom got us, um, a couple, she got us everybody, these two liter sodas, these big old and big dog. You remember them bitches? When they first came out with them bitches. And one year they came out with a damn three liter soda. Bring that bitch up.
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Bro, you rolled into my neighborhood with a fucking three liter soda, bro?
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Bro, that bitch was a gangbanger. So that, you know, that's the kind of shit I'd get that little bastard a three liter soda, baby. Shake that bitch up. But I think also some jewelry, get him something, man. I'm going to ice my family out probably with some stuff from Kohl's or maybe some Backwoods shirts or whatever, you know, different shit. What is it called? Full body fits.
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Maybe some Backwoods fits or something. So, yeah, I think, but that an eight-year-old, I like something, though, that he has to think or something, something you can also maybe do with him. There's got to be like a fun, like a good game or something. Or a shovel, too. Or a treasure map. Get him like a something. Maybe hide something for him and get him that treasure. Get him a treasure, a shovel.
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treasure getter because yeah then you have him dig up something and maybe it's nothing right but oh well that's life huh that's life shorty better learn it now work hard bro you ain't getting shit but no i think also a big hug maybe uh take him to a nice movie oh what about this What if you get him like a gift card to a movie theater and then he gets to pick out some movies he wants to go see?
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So maybe that could be something where you get to read the movies to him and be like, well, these are the movies they have for your age. And then he gets to pick one and choose it. And then it's him making a choice and feeling like he has a choice in if you guys get to spend time together or not. I think that would have been something that I probably would have enjoyed.
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My mom took me to Wendy's once when we were kids, and I remember that. That's nice. That was something nice as well. Destiny. Is that lady's name? Yeah, and just Merry Christmas to you and your son. I'm glad you guys get to do some fun stuff together. What's something else? I think something like that is nice, where he gets a say-so in it, and then it's a choice he made.
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So that kind of builds up his ability to think and ask, like, okay, well, what are the choices, right? Maybe. What do I know? Eight-year-old kid might not. He might want to just sip Trank or whatever and sit in a fucking sedan in the parking lot. I have no idea what kids are doing now. We got a call that came in right here. As always, hotline 985-664-9503. What's up, Theo?
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You guys went to a Native American casino. Okay. Thank you.
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It's not racist to see Asians, brother. Let me tell you that. It's not racist to see Asians. You see Asians. What are you going to do? Not see them or whatever. Pretend you're, you know, rip your eyes out of your head. No, it's okay to see Asians, brother. Let's see more. Sorry. Let's hear more.
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Yeah, I've seen a lot of that, man. The one guy was yelling. I remember there was a basketball or something. I remember walking through a casino one time and they had an Asian fellow over there.
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And, yeah, they love it. Asians like that risk. They like the fucking risk, man. Because I think Asians, they like the risk. They like the smoke. They like the smoke and they like the risk, you know.
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So, yeah, dude, they fucking, yeah, Asians, bro.
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You know? So, yeah, Asians love that shit, bro. Hey, bro, put four Asians in a box. What do you got? People that gamble. Praise God, baby. Here we go. We got a call that came in right here. Onward.
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That's that Bobby Lee lunch whistle, baby. You know what I'm saying? That's that Bobby Lee mating call right there. And you could see Bobby Lee just looking up in the distance behind a big stack of, like a big rice wall or something.
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Hey, Miles, and thank you for calling, and I'm glad that you have a brother, man. Let's hear some more.
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Well, I think you could do it in a gift way, you know? You could do it in a, um... in a gift way, like a note or something like that. You hide it. You put a note in a package, a little note or let, you know, when you write it, draw it or whatever. And it's like, um, and it says, it says like, are you, and then it just has like two guys hugging or whatever, you know?
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Um, but then he's just going to think he's going to think that you, that he's just, you're just asking if he's in the Navy or whatever. So you got, I'm trying to think of how do you do it? I think you just got to tickle him or not until he tells you if he's gay or not. That's what my uncle would do. Because that's how you even get gay.
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Somebody just tickles you so damn much, your whole spirit just kind of fucking spoils into just wanting to meet some guys somewhere. So I think you got to figure it out, brother. I don't know, dude. Why would you even call and ask me that? I don't know. I mean, I appreciate you calling. Sorry. I shouldn't, I shouldn't say that. I appreciate you calling man. You know what?
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I'm sorry you're dealing with that. Uh, but I, I'm glad you care. I remember, I thought my brother would try to make love to me when we were children, you know that. And, uh, and I'd be scared. And so at night I remember I'd put, I had me a little bag, a little sack of jingle bells, you know, a couple of J bells and, uh, I'd lay down at night and I'd balance some J-Bells on my body.
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And so if he tried to come get me, it would, you know, it would, you know, you could set off the alarm, you know. Oh, what do I want for Christmas? I am getting a book that I know I asked for. I got a couple vitamins. I'm getting this mic arm maybe fixed. What else? I'm trying to maybe take a little trip to the beach or something, but I don't know yet.
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Uh, and yeah, I'm going to spend Christmas in, uh, Louisiana. So I'm excited about that in Baton Rouge and, um, Covington, Mandeville, New Orleans, just around the hood. So, uh, grateful for that to see some of my friends and family. So those are things that are going on with me. Let me play a call right here.
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Thank you, brother. Thank you for checking it out. And yeah, I feel fortunate that we get to keep doing this.
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You know, I think that's a great question. I think you got to look at the reality of it. If you're home once a week for a year, that's tough. Now she broke her word. Some people are young and at certain times they just, their word isn't really as strong because they are still putting their word together. And I'm not justifying everybody's behavior, everybody's behavior.
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I'm not justifying my own behavior even. But there's definitely a different, you know, You know, you're still, you're learning some things. And people say, well, you're learning in your 20s. Yeah, you are. Yeah, you're learning how to be in a long distance, all that stuff. You're figuring it out.
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Sometimes you're afraid to hurt somebody's feelings, and that's why you don't tell them, even though it's selfish because it hurts them in the longer way. But you don't know that. You're figuring it out sometimes. So I think it's possible. I've had friends that have forgiven the loved one or significant other for sexual indiscrepancies, and then they packaged it up.
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And now you can hear them, you know, you'll invite, I won't even invite them over because they'll be in there thumping, brother. They'll be in there just slurping. So I think that's part of it. But yeah, I think, and look, you can always try it and see how it goes. But the weird thing, and I've done this where you forgive somebody, but then you keep bringing that shit up. That isn't good.
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You can see him looking up. And that's beautiful there right there. It's called Christmas Bells by Mike Franklin. And you got to love music this time of year. It's something that really keeps you together, keeps your mind together. I'll put on a song sometimes if I can't. You know, if I can't handle shit all day, I'm put on a song. And I'll put a pacifier in my ass and just pray to God.
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It feels good, but it's not cool. So that's the thing you can't do. If you forgive, you have to forgive, man. You have to forgive because otherwise you're just letting somebody hold, you're just, you're basically holding a card. You're saying I'm going to hold this card that I can use whenever I want. And that's even, that's worse than choosing to forgive or not to forgive.
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You know, that's you then saying, I want this power. I want this power to, uh, control how the situation goes constantly. Um, And I'll notice that in my own life over certain times. Sometimes I want to keep a level of communication.
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I want to keep enough distance where I can kind of... Like if I think somebody might have an issue or might be upset about it, instead of bringing it up and talking and getting it out, I'd rather almost sometimes... This is not the best part of me that wants to do this, but there's a part of me sometimes that would... It almost rather let them be unsure.
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You know, because it let them be unsure if our relationship is OK, because it gives me some sort of power. You know, it gives me some sort of control, perceived control in my own head. And. And that's a sick part of me that operates that way.
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And it's not always or anything, and it's definitely been more in the past, but I have noticed that behavior in myself at times if I'm not doing well or not taking care of myself. I'd rather keep things on thin ice because I'm used to it. That's why I do well. I'm okay on thin ice. How are you going to be out here? It's that kind of shit. But holding a grudge. Yeah, holding a grudge type shit.
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But yeah, man, I wish you the best luck. I think it's nice of you to call and ask about it, man. And also, we all figure things out as we go. So don't be too hard on yourself either. Let me hear one right here. Oh, there's a bug on this wrapping paper. It's okay. Does blue chew work? That's the question we all want to know. Does blue chew work, baby? Does it give you that randall?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E552 Vigilante Christmas
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E552 Vigilante Christmas
Just pay $5 shipping at checkout when you visit bluechew.com.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E552 Vigilante Christmas
Oh. That's bluechew.com to receive your first month free. Visit bluechew.com for more details and important safety information. We thank Blue Chew for sponsoring this past weekend with Theo Vaughn. That's me. When you think about businesses that are selling through the roof like ALO or Allbirds or Skims,
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E552 Vigilante Christmas
What I love best about Shopify is the simplicity. It's so easy. You check out, you get what you need. You check out, boom, bam, and you're done. Shopify, upgrade your business and get the same checkout that we use with Shopify. Sign up for your $1 per month trial period at shopify.com slash T-H-E-O, all lowercase. That's right. Go to shopify.com slash Theo to upgrade your selling today.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E552 Vigilante Christmas
That's S-H-O-P-I-F-Y.com slash T-H-E-O. you know, I just went through this On my phone and computer, I had to get it all figured out. I was paying for extra services that I didn't want. You know, they had some different annual, some of them were annual, some of them were monthly. There were things I couldn't believe I was still involved in. Rocket Money helped me figure that all out.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E552 Vigilante Christmas
Brother, let's hear one more song here. This is called Christmas Wonders by Howard Harper Barnes. Amen. And this sounds like rich people driving to shop or whatever, you know, and they're the kid has clean hair, you know, and the kid has clean hair and has a lunch that has a lunchbox that has actual lunch in it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E552 Vigilante Christmas
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
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Cancel your unwanted subscriptions and reach your financial goals faster with Rocket Money. Go to rocketmoney.com slash T-H-E-O. That's rocketmoney.com slash Theo. rocketmoney.com slash T-H-E-O. All right, y'all, it's holiday season. It's time for family and food. And let's be honest, a little bit of chaos. But while we're all out there making memories, let's keep it safe.
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E552 Vigilante Christmas
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E552 Vigilante Christmas
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E552 Vigilante Christmas
That's F-O-R-ThePeople.com slash this past weekend or pound law, pound 529 from your cell. This is a paid advertisement. All right, let's take a call right here.
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E552 Vigilante Christmas
Aliens. You think an alien is going to come to America on a fucking drone or whatever? On some bitch ass... Toyota drone or something? Them bitches have got, it's basically a ceiling fan that's in the fucking air with a couple Christmas lights on it. Look at these aliens. Bro, aliens are doing aliens. They blink their eyes and your fucking asshole's missing.
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They're, they're, they're doing, they're on another level. You think they're out here just, just running around just on, you know, 97 octane over here? Just, just peeking in neighborhoods and shit? Over here looking at a bunch of above ground swimming pools. Just watching people just singing Bruce Springsteen in above ground swimming pools over there. Outside of Trenton or whatever.
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Okay, rough patch. Lost your job and your home. Man, I'm sorry to hear that. And it's been about a year since your divorce.
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E552 Vigilante Christmas
You're in a court battle for your child. You're saying things aren't getting easier.
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Amen, brother. I appreciate you reaching out and just saying, hey, seeing what's going on. Yeah, dude, I've definitely, you know, God. I've felt down in the dumps. I think everybody has at some point. You know, and yeah, when the chips keep falling the other way, you know. When the Asian guy keeps winning all the gambling stuff.
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Um, yeah, man, I, uh, you know, I'll tell you a couple of things, man, that I've had noticed in myself. So there was times, there was times when, um, I only noticed the rough shit in my, in my life. I only noticed it. I'm not saying this happened to you, but that self-pity became my alcohol. Anytime I needed this, I'd feel sorry for myself.
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Well, let me open up another can of I feel sorry for myself. I'm not saying this is what you're doing at all. This just reminded me of this for myself. And I mean that wholeheartedly, bro. I would just slurp a six-pack of self-pity. That was my drug. This is wrong. I can't, you know. And when that hit me, I was like, oh, shit, man. I'm washing myself in bath water.
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You know, I remember my lunchbox, sometimes it would just have a little piece of paper in there and say, fuck you on it. You know, and then some silverware in that bitch, too. So it'd make a, you know, it'd make that sound, that very industrial sound. When you were running with it, you would hear the silverware in there.
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I'm doing the things I'm supposed to do to take care of myself. I'm getting this stuff off of me and out of my system. But then I got a straw in my own bath water. And I was sitting there just slizzurping on my own sadness all the time. Now, I'm not saying that's what you're doing, but I noticed for myself that self-pity became a drug for me. What else, man? Let me think of something else.
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You know, that's a lot, man, because a lot of what you're saying has real like emotional attachment to it. You're trying to get your kids out of your house. You know, you're that's a lot of upheaval. And I think some of that probably just takes time, you know. But, yeah, I'm sorry, man. That's also a lot. That's a lot.
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And so I think just give yourself some grace to be, you know, to not also put the pressure on yourself to feel great. You know, it's a lot of tough stuff going on. You know, the other day I was upset about something. I wanted to call and just fucking rearrange the tits on somebody. I wanted to switch them bitches, put the FM one on the AM dial and vice versa. I was just pissed at this lady.
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But instead, I just sat in my car for a little bit. I breathed. That's why God gave me this big note. He's like, breathe, motherfucker. What are you doing? You out here just fucking just taking chances, bitch. I'm showing you. You know, do an eight ball of air, buddy. We need, you know, G up. And I had me a couple of Charleston shoes there. I found them a corridor and ate them bitches.
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Oh, and then I just went to an AA meeting. And after that, after that, I even called my brother. I said, hey, man, I can't. I'm about to lose. You know, if I call this person right now, I'm going to lose my mind. He said, well, wait till later. Because I was attaching all this other shit to my day. I was attaching all this old, these feelings and stuff to my day.
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And to that next thing, I would bring in a whole trailer full of bullshit. And I was going to hitch it to this one moment about the way things had gone down with this woman. It wasn't like a dating. It was a work thing. But it was all me. It was all my shit, you know, that I was bringing extra. And then when I finally was chill, later on it was a normal conversation. And it was actually positive.
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So it could be positive. I don't know what I'm telling you, man. I'm just telling you, I'm just, yeah, man, I'm sorry that you're dealing with that. And it's a tough time of year and it's the holidays. But you're not alone, man, you know. We're only alone when we find ourselves alone. We got to remember to get out there too. Nobody's going to come and just help us be on alone.
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We have to do it, you know. And they say that old saying, you know, nothing changes if nothing changes, you know. So if I want something to be different, I have to do something. And I'm not preaching at you. I'm listening. I'm basically just talking to myself right now. But yeah, man, I love you and keep your head up and next year will be a different year.
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And then you nice piece of paper in there or something like get fucked, you know, or something like that inside of it. Let's hear a little bit more. Oh, we are rich. We have gas in our car. It's a Volvo. Late for the store. The mall. It's closing. Let's get some steak for the kids. We're rich. Are we almost out of gas? Fuck no, we're not. We're rich. We're rich. That's what that reminds me of.
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You know, next year will be a different year. And don't leave before the miracle happens. You know that saying, that's what they say. But Merry Christmas. Thank you for being a support supportive of this podcast. Thank you for letting me be a part of your life. Um, I'm going to make some new year's resolutions, something, nothing too heavy, just some things like some goals for the new year.
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You know, we want to do more ways to give back and I'm excited about that. We're finally putting a foundation together. So that's really exciting. Um, and so we're going to be able to find ways to do that. And, uh, What else? I think to just learn more from people that can help us learn. I want to learn more and get more information. And learn more about myself too.
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And try not to do everything by myself. That's one of my things I struggle with. Sometimes I just want to do it all alone. But the saddest thing I realize when you do everything alone... After it's done, there's nobody to talk to about it. There's nobody to share what there's not, you know. But anyway, not trying to end on a dour note. Oh, yeah, we went out Christmas caroling the other day.
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You know, I've been wanting to get out and do it. And it was just some guys from the gym. We put a little squad together and went out there and hit the streets and everything.
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uh we had a couple bangers couple songs we we had to give up in just in the middle of it um there was one church group that was having a dinner they invited us in for some cookies and uh select meats and stuff and it was good man it was we did a good job we did a good job out there we just put some songs together and just walked the streets and just went up to people's doors and knocked and
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Yeah, people were happy that somebody had a dog that saw us as well. And so people and animals were really enjoying it. And one woman, Alzheimer's, saw us. And then, I don't know if she saw us or not, but we was there. But we enjoyed it, man. And... Anyway, I just want to wish everybody a Merry Christmas. You guys take care of each other. Take care of your loved ones.
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Sorry if I sound preachy today. I feel really preachy. I don't mean to. I got to go do some work after this, and that's okay.
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you know um sometimes i struggle with like i'll get up and i'll be like i have to do that i have to do this instead of like you know i get to do this people say that all the time but it's like i really have to take that moment more and try to see look at my own perspective like this is life you know this is life and you get to do it and so how do i want to feel about it right
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How do I want to feel about it? And sometimes I'll still choose. I want to feel pissed about it. I want to feel bad about it. And then it's like, well, why? Why do I want to feel that way? I want to feel bad about it. I want to feel pissed about it. Because then it's really just me advertising. I want you to feel how I feel. That's kind of what it is.
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There's something inside of me that I want you to feel. You know, it's like, oh, it's not fair that I have to feel bad. You should feel. So I'm going to bring that energy out of myself. And I think more often than not, if I can try to get a little bit more around like. Well, let me find a good part of me.
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Let me find a part of me that's hopeful, that's grateful, that has a that's that fight and chance. Let me find that part of me inside of me. And bring that part to the front of me. Because that's also a part of me. Just as the part of me is that wants you to see the part of me that has pain, there's a part of me that has pride and that has hope.
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And that is a part of me too that sometimes I don't summon that part of me enough to the front of myself. And there's no judgment in that. I'm just kind of thinking and realizing it. I almost want to bring sometimes a little bit of a victimhood
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Um, I don't know if it's a victim, but I want, I just, I want somebody to recognize, you know, uh, something, you know, I want to, you know, but, but there's also a part of me that's like, I got this, you know, I can do this. You know, I'm okay. I can handle this. I love myself. I love someone. I love someone. So these are my hopes. These are my dreams. Let me walk out into the world with that.
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Let me bring that. Let that be the mirror that people see when they come up to me. And then I'll probably get more reflection out of the world that I would like than when I show up the other way. But anyway, man, I love you guys. And just thank you for coming out to the shows this year and being so supportive. And yeah. And be good to yourselves, man. You guys deserve it. Let's go out on one.
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Acorns lets you get started with the spare money you've got right now, even if all you've got is spare change. I have acorns set up for my niece and nephews, and I find it charming and engaging the way that they're able to start to see how savings works.
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These are all from Epidemic Sounds is where we get our music from. You can listen to these bangers in there. This is The Christmas Spirit by the Snowy Hill Singers. You guys be good to yourselves. What a fun year I think we tried to have. I just pray that we can have a good one next year too. We got this, baby. Praise God, baby gang. I hate that shit. Let me get one more.
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That was an antithesis of what I just said. Sorry, dude. All right, let's hear this one, guys. Love y'all. Oh, yeah, baby. Turn them lights off, baby. Turn them on, actually. I got to find my shoes. Oh, God, boy. Oh, yeah. Let me put some lotion on your legs, Big Daddy. I remember this old guy in our neighborhood would let us lotion his legs up, or his son would let him.
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E552 Vigilante Christmas
This man would let us lotion up his dad's legs. His dad had been in the war, I think, or in a fire or something. He would let us put the lotion on him when we were young. This reminds me of that. All right, that ain't it either. Jesus Christ, that's sad. Let's see one more that we got here. Let's try this one.
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Rich people going to the mall with their clean hair and shit. And their kids or whatever.
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Merry Christmas, everybody. This is the peaceful Christmas waltz by Von Meyer. Von Meyer. no relative of mine. And a special, this sounds like somebody kind of dancing their way up to heaven just on the different stairs. And that may be my buddy Donny Ader, big, I like to say, Peace and blessings to my buddy Donnie Ader. He's headed to heaven.
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E552 Vigilante Christmas
And he sold big rig truck and tractor supplies over there. On the Louisiana border, baby. God bless you, brother. Merry Christmas, everyone.
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E552 Vigilante Christmas
They need to throw a fucking, and he'd throw a fucking mill of light against the wall.
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Like, mom, who is that? Mom, is that Santa? He's like, no, that's your, and it would be your dad or your stepdad or the mechanic who y'all owed money to. Dude, I remember the mechanic, one time we owed him something. He came and got that bitch right back off the car, bro. I don't know if it was a damn spark plug or it was a motor joint or whatever.
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It was a damn clevis clamp or something for a steering pendulum. And he came and pulled that bitch right out of there, dude. Yeah, that car barely worked after that. You had to turn the radio up to get it to go left. Every time that if you wanted that bitch to go left, you had to fucking crank up some Aerosmith. And pray. Two people had to be praying in the back. It ran on four hands power.
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You had to have four hands pushed together, praying straight to God. Crank up that Aerosmith. Bam, son. 90 degree right turn. And that's how we did it back then. And that's what that song reminds me of. That's Christmas Wonders by Howard Harper Barnes. Beautiful tune there to get you ready for the holidays. Let me see what else we got here. Here's one right now. And this is Christmas in the Club.
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On Pluto. Pluto. On Ricky. On Mario. On DeAndre. In the club. We all reindeer. That's a mildly urban tune, I believe there. And that's Christmas House Music by Dylan Stitts. All right, and we may have one more Christmas tune here to bring you guys into the world, bro. We got a little something right here. And this is called Trap Beat Christmas Past by Cushy.
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If you're ready to take control of your money, sign up now and join the over 14 million all-time customers who have already saved and invested over $25 billion with Acorns. Head to acorns.com slash Theo, T-H-E-O, or download the Acorns app to get started.
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And that is Trap Beat Christmas passed by Cushy with a little bit of ensemble in the background. I added some vocals there. That was Rocky got that cock on him at the end. And everybody remembers a fella I grew up with, his son Rocky, and he was mentally...
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he was just, he was, well, he wasn't mentally, he was unmental or, you know, he just, his, his shit was kind of, you know, he was that fucking, he was just the Lord side item. And he, uh, he, uh, but he had that thing on him. Maybe he had that piece. He had that fricking Draco on him, boy. Rocky got that cock on him.
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And I remember one year around the holidays, everybody was just shocked at the, uh, At the size of the stump on that beautiful young fella. Even his father. Even his father was. And that's what it's all about. What's going on? Sorry. Don't know what I'm talking about. We're in the Christmas time of year.
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And I want to thank everybody who's just listened to the podcast this year and made a part to be a part of it. We've had the most successful year. As a podcast, depending on what you determine success by, but we've had the most prolific year, I think, you know, and that's a blessing just to have it like that. And what's going on today?
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E552 Vigilante Christmas
I got to go over to Vanderbilt University over there with Coach Clark Lee and hang out with some of the players over there. And watch them practice. They got a beautiful facility, you know. And it was just, you know, I felt lucky to be in the building. This is an SEC football school.
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And just to watch them go and just how it all – they have, like, the different periods for when, like, the teams switch and practice different parts of the game plan and different formats and everything, when the football format – And just to witness all of that was pretty awesome. You know, and just to be in Nashville as that team is building and really just putting that anchor down, baby.
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This was the year that they really kind of, I think, put that stamp win on the program. And just a great season over there. So that was great, just to get to do that. And I wish them the best over there against Georgia Tech with Diego Pavia. The Latino Ninja. And that guy just, you know, he is one of a kind, man. And that whole team, it's just, they got a family over there.
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And so I think that's what I like the most, just being able to be around a group of people. And As you get older and as life changes, you don't get a lot of groups like that. You don't get a lot of team like that in your life as much. So I think even just to get to see that and be around it. We went over there for maybe an hour and a half or something.
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And, uh, yeah, it was just, it was cool, man. I'm not trying to brag about it or anything and some, you know, but it was just, I just thought it was, it was just cool. So thankful to them. Um, what's been happening in the world. Uh, we got a couple of things, people right here. It says, um, New Jersey drones. Oh, God. What is this? They got a call that came in about it. Let's hear this.
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Today's episode is brought to you by I have some new tour dates to let you know about. I'll be in East Lansing. I'll be in Toledo, Ohio. Rama. Ontario in the Canada. Pittsburgh, PA. Eugene, Oregon. Kennewick, Washington, Seattle. Washington, Victoria, BC in the Canada. College Station, Texas. Belton, Texas. San Antonio, Durant. Amarillo. Oxford, Mississippi. Howdy, howdy. Fayetteville, Arkansas.
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The drones in New Jersey, yeah, I've seen it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
And you're like, oh, man, this is not how it was. Dream on! It's just, it has like a small Aeropostale in the back, kind of. Yeah, exactly. Yeah, that's kind of a bummer. Did you have to meet Bob to get into this?
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E551 Timothée Chalamet
There's a movie about me opening soon called A Complete Unknown. Timothy Chalamet is starring in the lead role. Timmy's a brilliant... Timmy is a brilliant actor. I kind of respect it, though. Nice. Honoring your youth. Timmy's my 12-year-old expression, dude.
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E551 Timothée Chalamet
timmy's a brilliant actor so i'm sure he's going to be a completely believable as me or younger me or some other me the film's taken from elijah wald's dylan goes electric a book that came out in 2015. it's a fantastic retelling of events from the early 60s that led up to the fiasco at newport after you've seen the movie read the book oh it's nice super sweet
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E551 Timothée Chalamet
So do you even talk to him on the phone or anything yet?
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E551 Timothée Chalamet
At a swim meet too. At a swim meet. Swim meet's the worst because you can't even talk to the person next to you because it echoes so much in the room. I've never been to a swim meet in my life. Even if you whisper a little, the people hear it. It travels. Yes. It travels. Oh, you cannot gossip.
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E551 Timothée Chalamet
You're right. And it is. And I definitely watch from my car with binoculars, so it's not too creepy.
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E551 Timothée Chalamet
The proof's in the pudding. Yeah. How do you expect him not to rehearse his own life? But yeah, that's the thing. You just can't gossip at a swim meet, man. Yeah, yeah, yeah. What are we talking about?
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E551 Timothée Chalamet
What do you guys have there? We play dice in the alleys like you were saying before.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
Oh, it got very, you got kind of like, yeah, very... Anemic. Yep. Anemic. I'm sure. What else is it called? Kind of Boo Radley-esque. Exactly. Exactly. Exactly. You know. Yeah, because they should give you at least an hour in the sun. They give it to inmates. Yeah. And just because I'm learning social studies, I don't get it. I don't get it. Exactly.
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E551 Timothée Chalamet
And then I'd be in the basement doing, just acting all day. Just because I'm learning fucking Voltaire. I don't get 40 minutes in the sun. Yeah, I don't get 40 minutes in the sun. Nothing. A raisin got in the sun. Hey. I don't. Hey, that's a good play. Now it's right there, man. Denzel Washington, baby. I will accept that. I will accept that. Denzel Washington. Thank you very much.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
Yeah, there's got to be. There is a theater program. That's a good question. I grew up in Louisiana. We had some theater. We just did like- Did you ever do theater growing up? Yeah, I did. I did. Well, it was just called Drama Club or whatever, and it was a lot of people who was- It was a lot of people, I think, that wanted to be actors, and then a lot of people that just were kind of like-
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E551 Timothée Chalamet
Yeah, yeah. Yeah, I saw you were just in Nashville. Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
Yeah, I did just some stuff at school, but I would always mess it up. Like we did like Sherlock Holmes or something. And I was like Watson or whatever, his buddy or whatever. It's like his, his man crush, whatever. And our, our guy was very like progressive. So we try to make it there to be like this small, like lover scene or, or just like some, um, ambiance between Sherlock and Watson.
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E551 Timothée Chalamet
I don't know if I went for it or not. I was like 13. You got to be bold. You got to go out there, man. You got to be bold.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
It could have gone either way. But yeah, there was this definitely kind of romantic where they're looking for the clues and they end up kind of finding each other. That's what the guy said. And I was like, this seems like insane. But you didn't do it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
I tried my best but then I remember the first night I got out there on stage I took on this Latino accent for some reason it's a strong choice man and nobody knew it was coming perfect and I was like what's up Holmes you know and then so yeah that was just and that's when I realized it was tough for me to be in some ensemble things I just wanted to be by myself you know like that kind of thing would you do a movie if it came your way
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
Oh, yeah. It's my producer's favorite. No way. Yeah, I haven't seen it yet. That we just met? Yep, that guy, Zach, is his name. No way. And he loves it. Yeah, he really loves it.
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E551 Timothée Chalamet
I don't think so. I just am super protective about myself for some reason, which may seem kind of weird. I don't know.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
Yeah. No, a good choice, dude. Yeah. Um, who, so in New York when you were a kid, like who was your best friend? Best friend growing up. Nobody, man. I was always pursuing acting, dude. Were you really?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
Oh, yeah. Yeah. Well, yeah, I think – well, especially in New York because it's so expensive. In other places, some people get a roommate because they just get maybe lonesome or whatever.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
I don't have a roommate. I would like to get one or I would like to get a wife maybe this year or next year.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
Some, but sometimes you're shocked at who they'll set you up with. Really? Like you're insulted? I mean, you're just like, well, we must think that you think differently of me.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
Just somebody put me all with like a. You know, just a woman head, like, you know, any way I say this, I lose here.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
Yeah, it's a good place. It's like a little city. Yeah. It's like a little city, kind of like a fancy little city. It's almost like the JonBenet of cities, kind of like, you know, look at this outfit, kind of, you know, but dangerous at the same time. But it has like kind of like an element of like mystery kind of. That's kind of a weird example.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
Yeah, but I just make sure that I just try and don't say anything that would be really mean about somebody. So right there, it could have got weird.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
There's a podcast sphere out there that things get handled or whatever. I don't want to use that term. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's terrifying. There's no lawyer involved. I'll say that. You're just winging it. The Lord is our lawyer. That's some of these people's motto.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
No, I'm from Louisiana, but, but Nashville, here's what it is. It's safe. It's nice. People are friendly. Um, you can't cheat on your wife there. So it's not because the city is too small, too small. Okay. You couldn't take your wife or spouse or significant other. Um, you couldn't even, yeah.
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E551 Timothée Chalamet
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
When you go into a role like this, do you start to think like, so a lot of younger people will think, that you're Bob Dylan. You almost become, you almost take a piece of the person's existence in a strange way. Does that make any sense to you?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
That's not what I mean. Some people are going to think you are... When they think of him in the future, your face will come into there.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
Like, and you couldn't take them to dinner or something and not see somebody that would know one of you or them.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
Right, you wanted to honor him as much as you could. Yeah, exactly. But also without being him as much.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
Yeah, well, there's enough people, but the South's a little gossipy.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
First of all, if you've never seen the Wonka movie, you just listen to the audio. That's a little bit. That's already weird, too. It's kind of. Yeah. Yeah. It's interesting.
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Interesting bridge right there. No, but I was saying the same thing, man. Yeah, it is, right? Like, just, yeah. Yeah. No disrespect, but I was just like, man. No, the godfather of surround sound, basically, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, that's what I heard. The premiere was pretty interesting. So, last night was your premiere. It was premiere in LA, man. It was great, you know.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
So there's a lot of, like, it's not really an adultery city. It's not a city that's, adultery's not like a trademark of the city, probably. How is it different from New Orleans? New Orleans is a little bit more dangerous, I think, you know? And probably better food, to be honest. Okay. I think you have to have crime to have good food. That's kind of how I feel.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
Oh, dude, thanks for coming the day after your premiere. Yeah, that's why I was a little late. I apologize, man. Were you guys up late?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
No, you got to celebrate. Did you have to get up and make a speech? What's it like at something like that? I, man, great question.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
Oh, yeah. He's a super legend. He was in the – You ever see Rounders?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
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Yeah, I play it sometimes. He's good. And both of the actresses were great, the ladies in it. Oh, and his wife was in it. What's her name?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
Erico. Yeah. Yeah, they got a beautiful group of ladies in there. And men, too. Yeah, look at Boyd Holbrook, man. With the blue suit on. That's a handsome man. Is he real handsome? Yeah, he's a stud. Well, dude, you're kind of a handsome dude. You are, man.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
Oh, yeah, there's a lot of freaking thieves out there. How long have you had it? This haircut I've had for probably... It's a little dicey today. I've had it for probably, well, I had it as a child. Oh, no way. So this goes back. Oh, yeah. And then I tried to, like, blend in, like, whenever I moved to Hollywood and stuff, and it didn't work for me. And so then I tried to blend out.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
Oh, so you started in L.A. before Nashville. Yeah. Yeah, I lived out here for 12 years. I was doing stand-up comedy. This is where I started doing stand-up comedy. Oh, yeah, where? At the Comedy Store and stuff like that?
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Comedy Store. It was awesome, man. I really enjoyed it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
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Yeah, and that was like, yeah, all types. They had like Chris D'Elia, Tom Segura.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
That's a good question. You know what's so funny? They're totally different from each other, and some people in one don't even know the people in the other. Because the audience is different, you think? It's just a total different group of people. Like you go there, and it's almost like it feels like you have to start all over.
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It's just a total different – Like I'll go into a club there, and it feels like – A whole different thing. I'm walking into a club for the first time.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
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I think you'll get a lot of respect, but you just feel that way. It's not your territory, you know? Right, right, right. And you want to give respect to the guys that that's their grounds that they walk on every day.
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Because that's where they live. Like if somebody came out and was like being real flashy, but they're not in your kind of club here, it would be the same way, I think. Interesting. So there's a lot of code of conduct like that. Would you ever do Saturday Night Live? I don't know, man. You know, it's so funny. I went and saw it recently.
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It is crazy. You did it? Yeah, I've done it twice. It's super dialed in, right? I should have known that. Oh, yeah, dude. I went with Chris Farley's brother. It was the first time that he'd been back to go to SNL since his brother was on there, since he'd went with him. What was that like for him? Dude, he told so many great stories. I wish they'd have put him out on stage.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
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I was like, have him go out there. Right. Tell his stories. It was just classic, man. But I went to watch Bill Burr. I'm a big Bill Burr fan, so I went to watch him.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
Oh, sick. That was dope. Wow, yeah. And then there we are right there with Chris Farley's brother right there.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
No, dude. It's true. Did he take your haircut or no? HGH, dude. No, no, no. I got to get some HGH. Do you work out? Yeah, I do work out, dude. Yeah, I do. God. Yeah, I went today, I mean. That's what I mean. But yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
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What else do I want to know about this film? So you didn't hear anything from Bob. What about like his wife or his kid or something?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
Okay. Because I've had that. You've never had Yakum? I haven't had the edible version, no. Oh, this thing. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Exactly.
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E551 Timothée Chalamet
So even all the Dylans are unique. Yeah, I don't know what that means. You phase? I don't know. You phase with the finger like that. I don't know. I mean, I know phase banks. I don't know a lot of the phase guys. I know the one of them gave CPR to Sketch one night or something when he wasn't doing good. Whoa. But anyway, shouldn't have said that out loud.
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E551 Timothée Chalamet
What's up, brother? That guy. Did you see him? No. Oh, my gosh. Wow. It's crazy how different worlds are so different, dude.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
Oh, yeah, he's been on that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. He's a great bro. Yeah, yeah, yeah. He is so creative. He has one of the most creative minds I've been around. Yep. Just like he has his own pentameter of making jokes and stuff. It's pretty fascinating. Is he a stand-up? Nope, he's not a stand-up. I think there's this new thing that goes on now where as if somebody's – It's interesting.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
What's going to happen with stand-up? Because stand-up has been this thing that people always go practice and then they go do. But now a lot of people build so much traction from social media. Yeah, they pop off like that. Right, but then how do you take that and perform it? Is there a performance element? Yeah, it's a whole different thing.
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E551 Timothée Chalamet
you know sexy again in some way yeah i think well the news got like very um all the same i feel like and it got very i what a lot of people believe maybe um commandeered by advertising in a way right right right right some of that happens it's capitalism so i think podcasting was just this like became this open format yes yeah yeah yeah where it was like okay also you know that you're really resonating in some way yeah right because it's not dollars that or it's not like
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
Well, especially in the beginning for the first like four or five years, you're not really making any money. So it's like you're just doing your best. You're just keeping it. And then at a certain point, like people will say, well, if you're not going to say what I want, then get your advertising off of my network.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
Yeah, yeah. Wow. That's a deep cut right there. It is a very deep cut. I thought it came in a small baggie. Yeah, I haven't had this, bro. I have not had this. But, you know, New Orleans has one of the largest Vietnamese populations.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
Oh, it's a risk dollars wise. Yeah. I mean, Dana White was on here one time and one of our episodes got pulled down because of we had Bobby Kennedy on this political friend, a buddy of mine, but who also ended up going into politics, but they didn't want to be associated with it or whatever.
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And, uh, anyway, Dana was on and he said, what, what, who called and said they, and we were like, it was this, um, Kellogg's it was biking company or something. No, it was like a proton or whatever it's called. Peloton. Peloton. Interesting. And dude, next thing you know, people all across the country were throwing Pelotons into the Boston river. Yeah.
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E551 Timothée Chalamet
Do they really? Well, that's not going to help them.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
Anyway. Oh, there he is. Oh, yeah. That's what happens when you. He married Samantha, huh? I don't know about this show. Yeah. What else was I going to think about? Oh, when you think about, so I just want to make sure that we get a lot about this film and what I thought that was. Yeah. What did you like about it?
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E551 Timothée Chalamet
Nope. Well, yeah, I know some of his music. Did your parents or your mom listen to it? Oh, yeah. My mom listened to it. This kid I grew up with, he would play it in his room every night. He had the harmonica and everything. He was a big Bob Dylan fan. No way. My friend Ty, who I used to live with. Yeah, I mean, Bob Dylan was the first mumble rapper. Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, man, absolutely.
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E551 Timothée Chalamet
Yeah, whining with a backbeat. Absolutely. Everybody's like... you know, thinking that it was some of these other guys like Uzi Vert or maybe Kodak Black, who's just a mumbler. I mean, at a certain point, can we just say that? He's great.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
Yeah. But definitely early on. Yeah, it's gotten a little rocky. I feel like it's gotten rocky recently. Which is cool, man. He might be going through some stuff too. Who knows? Sometimes it's so hard to know, you know, what people are going through.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
That'd be great if we had a word, like it's like a word counter for you and Kodak. Yeah. You're like just miles ahead of him. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Literally. Dude, you could sneeze and be like seven words ahead of him. I feel like. You said it. You said it. What about some other... Well, I just want to think anything else about the film that was... Was it hard to learn the music?
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Did you have any issues with that? Or how did you guys make that happen? Not really, man.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
Oh, when you were meeting with that guy? Yeah, yeah. In the dark alleys? In the dark alleys. Yeah. To work on the accent. Yeah, to work on your... keeping your tongue down when you say certain vowels. Down with the palate. Hey, man, you know. Do you work, you know. Years ago, I went to a voice test.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
When people do frontside piggybacks, that's I've never heard of that in my life. And that's when I quit playing tennis in junior high school, I'll tell you.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
And anybody that can draw a picture of Timothy and me... and involved in frontside piggybacking, let me know. I'll buy it from you, and we'll donate $1,000 to a charity of your choice.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
Yeah, yeah, that Broadway, that area. That area is really interesting down there. What else about Nashville that I really like?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
Oh, right through there? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, I think we should get that.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
Yeah. Are you a big holidays guy? You know what? I think it does remind me a little bit to slow down kind of, you know, which is nice because life gets going pretty fast a lot of times. Do you think you're more elfish or Santa Claus? Oh, it's a good question. Oh, I wish I could be a little more Santa. I'm more of sometimes a little more Mrs. Claus. Like I'll start bitching about a lot of shit.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
I'll just get a latch in, but I just got to slow down. It's just been like a long year. Yeah. You've been busy. Yeah. What are you going to do for, are you going to go away or anything? Yeah, I'm going to go to Louisiana and see some family. Then I might try to take a vacation for a few days. We'll see. A little Baton Rouge? Yeah, my family lives right down there.
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I haven't been to that. I go to watch Lipscomb College. They play soccer there. What? Lipscomb College. No way. It's a college, and they have soccer, and so I'll go watch some of their games. What's their student body population? That's a good question. Pull it up. Lipscomb College. Let's see.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
Oh, yeah. One of them was my neighborhood growing up, dude. I remember our property tax was $8 one year. My mom paid in cash, dude, right out of her purse. I was like, where do we live at?
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The guy that came by. Was it a legit guy, you think? He looked pretty legit. He had all of his buttons on his head.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
Oh. That's me, baby, moderate. Mitchell Llama program provides affordable rental and cooperative housing to moderate and middle income families. You're just talking about Alphabet City, basically. Okay. Yeah, dude. Wow.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
I like New York. I mean, yeah, it's definitely fascinating. You ever live there? No. I'll just stay there for like maybe three months at the most. I would live there. If I get a wife and she lives there, I'll stay. I'll go live there.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
Well, she looks like, probably looks like a nice lady, I think. Let me think about the rest of it. Probably maybe played volleyball, maybe didn't. Maybe likes to be a mom, maybe. I don't know, dude.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
It's one of those colleges that right next to it has the high school also, and then the children's school or whatever.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
Okay. Because people that laugh get jokes usually. You can't... Unless something's wrong with you and you just laugh every now and then. Right, right.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
Ooh, I hope she can, but I'm not trying to be some kind of pervert or whatever, but I wouldn't mind seeing one every now and then, especially if it's holidays or whatever and she wants to...
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
you know pop off a damn b handspring or something for everybody cuts into some lackeys or whatever i'm down for it um so yeah i think i'm open to a lot of different things i think yeah you know and like handstands and shit i mean okay i don't know what you're gonna get here
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
Blue Chew, baby. It's that holiday season, brother. And you don't want that limp frickin' Roger hiding inside of your pants, boy, do you?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
I have some new tour dates to let you know about. I'll be in East Lansing. I'll be in Toledo, Ohio, Rama, Ontario in the Canada, Pittsburgh, PA, Eugene, Oregon, Kennewick, Washington, Seattle, Washington, Victoria, BC in the Canada, College Station, Texas, Belton, Texas, San Antonio, Durant, Amarillo, Oxford, Mississippi. Howdy, howdy. Fayetteville, Arkansas. Tuscaloosa, Alabama.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
Yeah, you could go from K to 40. 4,800 students. Okay. But their soccer team has been ranked in the top 25 the past few years.
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E551 Timothée Chalamet
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E551 Timothée Chalamet
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
So stop putting off those doctor's appointments and go to ZocDoc.com slash Theo to find and instantly book a top-rated doctor today. I mean, it's crazy. You can get it for your brain. You can get it for your teeth, your limbs, your tongue, whatever you need, ear, nose, and ass. Boy, they got it. ZocDoc.com. That's Z-O-C-D-O-C.com slash Theo. ZocDoc.com slash Theo.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
Today's episode is brought to you by BetterHelp. If you're, you know, it's that time of year, people get a little cagey. You know, people bite their damn, you'll see somebody biting their neighbor, biting their mother-in-law. Somebody will just damn chew a mole off their damn mother-in-law's neck because of anger, discomfort, uncertainty. And that's why you might need mental health help
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
So I think, yeah, it's like, I just don't, you know, I think more will be revealed about who the lady could be, but I'm also just being more open to it. You know, it's like, you gotta be open to that, to get a wife, to be like, oh, I'm gonna get, you know, I'm gonna have a wife and be with the wife. You gotta be open to it, brother. Yeah. You gotta set the, you gotta set your life up. Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
And how are you going to get divorced if you don't get married? You know what I'm saying?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
No, my mom's organizing. I got my tree up right now. Nice. You got a tree. I got a box of gifts. There's a lady that I don't even know who has sent me a box of Christmas ornaments for the past four years. Sweet. It comes every year. I put them up on the tree.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
Every Christmas it's called, it's a murder movie.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
Or it's just some movie about, it's about somebody who used to love somebody and they're watching their family now. And they send them this random box and people put it on their tree, they don't know. Yeah. And it has a camera in it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
Well, we're supposed to do Christmas caroling this year with a couple of fellows from the gym, actually. And so we're supposed to practice on Friday. And we just hired a cool brother over there in Nashville to help us learn some of the lyrics. I love when you say that, man. Oh, yeah. We're excited about it. There's all brothers going, so you got to respect the culture, man.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
You know what I'm saying? Oh, man. But yeah, and then what are we going to go? Oh, I watched Family Man. Have you ever seen that one?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
With Nicolas Cage? Nicolas Cage. It's a great movie. One of the greats.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
What about, there's kind of a love triangle in the movie. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, there's a... So the women's Joan Baez. Joan Baez and Sylvie Russo. Is Sylvie Russo, was she an artist? I couldn't tell.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
Yes, she was very effective by Dylan in the movie, or her character was. Yeah. That was interesting to see.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
Yeah. Wow. That's interesting. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I found like, um, when I was watching it, um, Yeah, you're kind of rooting. It's weird because who you're rooting for changes almost from scene to scene in the movie.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
No, I mean, I was a Saints fan. I'm a New Orleans Saints fan, but I was not.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
I mean, I had on maybe a, you know, I might have had on a Drew Brees jersey.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
Dude, yeah, that's for sure. But no, yeah, it's like, yeah, how do you even start to get things figured out? But that's one thing that I liked about it. I like seeing the different – and I like that there was like, okay, what's this relationship like over here going to happen? What's this relationship like over here going to happen?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
And then just seeing like – I did get a better idea of like, oh, okay, Bob Dylan was just kind of like affected dude that he kind of was maybe better than he thought he was or – Or he was actually so great and they tried to manipulate him. It was just all so confusing. And I think it was confusing to him. Exactly. It was just a lot going on.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
Let's pull him up. Let's give him some shine because I need to go watch him. You think if I hit him up, he would invite him to a game?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
And he seemed like a unique person and probably like a secretly sensitive guy. And so for all those things to happen so quick to him and then for him to try to figure it out and navigate what was real, I don't know.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
Yeah, dude. You know what, though? I think it was I do think that it was interesting if you frame it up like this is what it is. It's a it's a it's a it's a few years in a man's life. That was a very interesting man who's probably written so many songs that some young people don't even know that he wrote. Yeah, exactly. I was listening. I was like, no way he wrote that. And like.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
Just some relationships that he had with other artists that you may not even know about.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
Because not only do you have to manage what you present, but you have to manage also how...
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
I sound like I'm- Yeah, well, no, they had that first guy, Narcissus or whatever, looked in the river and saw himself, you know? Yeah, yeah, yeah, exactly. And then he's like, hey, where are the ladies at or whatever? And you're like, whoa, dude, what are you talking about?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
Oh, as we're talking, the computer follows. Yeah, yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
Like, you're over here, like, trying to start Clairol or whatever.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
Fucking working on your, you know... Yeah, it's like just a bunch of Dior moisturizer. Talking about lip filler to everybody.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
Um, what about other, um, because you can only do so many biopics too. Yeah. Yeah. That's kind of weird. You kind of, you burned a biopic. I burned a biopic. Is it a biopic?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
Okay. Like that I could do or you could do? I don't know. If I keep talking to people, why do you sit with me and just talk the whole time?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
He could be a dirtball. But I like some of his energy, dude. Some of his shit is pretty hot. It's very Bob Dylan, man. Just be who you want to be. That's a good point. That's how I do feel about him. It's like, oh, I feel like he's kind of unique. He kind of reminds me of like an Eminem, like when Eminem kind of like... He reminds me of how Eminem was just unique in his time period.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
That's a good point. It could be some crypto failure.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
Oh, I think he's definitely super entertaining. Yeah, and we're just joking around.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
Dude, you should be a politician, dude. You're good. I was acting. But what are that? Or maybe Abraham Lincoln's son or whatever? I could be Abraham Lincoln. Me or you? You. What about if you— Abraham Lincoln's son? Who was Abraham Lincoln's son? Dave Lincoln. That's a ridiculous idea. It was Dave Lincoln. Was it? Dave Lincoln. Was it really? Or Ricky Lincoln? Who is his son? Tad Lincoln.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
Oh, my God. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Go to his information. Let's see him. Wow. Dude, you could be Tad Lincoln. The fourth son of Abraham Lincoln.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
And imagine his father gave some of the greatest speeches and here he is. And he has this kind of like a little bit of a... like a disfigurement or some impairment. And he's like, how do I overcome this to say something as important that my father said?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
Yeah, easily. You caught a frisbee that was dirty and you were down for two months. He went to see Aladdin and the Wonderful Lamp. Oh, wow, on April 14th, 1865, Tad went to Grover's Theater to play Aladdin and the Wonderful Lamp while his parents attended the performance of Tom Taylor's play Our American Cousin at Ford Theater. That night, his father was assassinated.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
And you finally run up to him as he's done. Yeah. And you say something super important.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
Huh? I don't know. We got to get somebody good.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
Yeah, age me down a little bit. Or Jim Carrey. I think I could see you playing a Jim Carrey one day, too. I was thinking about that. He's brilliant, dude.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
Even when she doesn't exist, he's still trying to flirt. That's the best part.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
I don't believe in personality. That would be an interesting guy to play because that's really cool. That's a cool scene to play if you could do that. Yeah, and I think he's had a crazy life. Yeah, what his life was like. Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
Bigger than anything. Bigger than anything, right? In the 2000s. Oh, yeah. And he had a show called In Living Color before that that was like Jamie Foxx was on it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
Yeah, you're done, dude. Yeah, some people got that damn, you got a damn foot Mozart out there. I don't have that.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
Yeah. Right? It was him, yeah, and they had a... Now he's become an artist. Yeah, now he's an artist. But it's just interesting to get all the art out of your system, you know, because some artists – I think that's kind of what he – I think that's what he feels like.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
Wow. What about, do you feel like you have to be like, because you're kind of like the it guy, like the it younger guy in Hollywood. For sure, for sure. You know? But does that feel like... I don't know. And I know it's like, do you, how do you, and a lot of that is a lot of times curtailed by like the industry.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
Like you're like, you have a pretty, like I thought you'd come with like in a tank or something like you drove over here by yourself. Yeah. So definitely, um, kind of, I guess.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
maybe against what i was thinking which doesn't mean anything um but do you worry about how do you still be yourself and find yourself at a time when you could be so maneuvered by um so many bigger listen man not to bring it back to the movie but that's where bob dylan's so influential no this is perfect no because bob always followed his path and what's interesting about the movie industry instead of like as opposed to the music industry the music industry you write your own music you know
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
Really? Yes. Oh, that's fire. Yeah, I got to go check him out, man. I haven't been to see a game. It's unfortunate. I did get to go see Vanderbilt, which is the college that's, that's the SEC college that's actually in Nashville.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
I want inside baseball. I just, you know, you're like a real thinker, you know? So it's not like you're going to give some answer that isn't traveling through your thoughts and you explaining stuff. So that's perfect. There's no wrong way to answer it. It's a weird thing. It's like...
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
What does that mean? So a director can kind of put you through some fucking shit?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
Safdie. I was 21. Uncut Gems, that's that movie, right? Yeah, Uncut Gems.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
I've seen Nathan Fielder's show. Yeah. Wow, that's cool. Yeah, yeah. Wow, that must have been awesome, man. Because that guy, that uncle Jim's is so good. I look forward to seeing that.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
So directors can do that. So sometimes it's like that. It's going to be a journey. It's going to be a journey, yeah. What was the biggest journey through the unknown? I just want to get the name of it right. A complete unknown Christmas day. Leave it like that. What was the biggest journey through a complete unknown on Christmas day?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
No, it's a smaller, it's a smaller energy. Yeah. But we went to one game this year. They played Alabama and they beat, they upset Alabama. Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
It's not. Yeah. And they know that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So yeah, we're not telling a secret. No, no, no. You got to keep keeping their place. But that was the game they won. And look, they didn't even, it was like all these lawyers and attorneys like tearing down the goalposts.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
Yeah, did you have to, so your phone was off for that long, so you just locked in, and what would you do, just go to, did you sleep on set, or what do you do, what's that like?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
Oh, like somebody putting something in your head that stays in there.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
They even had, they had a, there we are after the game. We actually, we. Is it a big law program? Carl Lee is their coach and he's an awesome guy. I mean, he's a class act. He just gets smoked here. Oh, we got to, yeah. There you are. Dude, what are you doing on the field, dude?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
That's like, yeah, if you're watching another movie that some guy's in, you're right there.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
Get ready. As long as it's on the front, brother. Yeah, get ready. Calm down, man. Get ready, get ready. It'll do Hollywood for you.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
I've been out of my comfort zone since I was born. All right, fair, fair, fair. Yeah, I never subscribed to it. Or I never got the keys or whatever. You know the code they give you in high school to your locker? Yeah, you never got that. I remember going up to my comfort zone and being like, oh, I don't think this is it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
Probably after like a sauna and ice bath type of thing. Oh, you do ice baths? Yeah, yeah. I'll get in there, dude. Oh, yeah. I'll freaking just... I'll lay in a polar bear's ass, brother. I like it like that. Oh, yeah. I like it just brisk like that, you know? I love that. Would you go to the Arctic? Oh, yeah. I would go up there. Mr. Beast just went up there. He went to Antarctica. Whoa.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
I don't know what he... He said there was nothing up there. There's not even like... You can't be like, hey, let's go somewhere, and like, no, you can't. I don't get how that stuff works, man. Where does he get the money? He's just... He's just huge, huh?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
well Mr. Beast has a show actually that comes out right before that like a week before but he was just we were just talking about it the other day and it's interesting yeah and it's an interesting show totally different though but one thing that's great about your movie is that first of all you just get you also just in addition to whatever's going on with the movie you get to hear like great music
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
Yeah. It's great music. Great, great music. It's great music. You get to remember like, um, Woody Guthrie. Yeah. Who played Woody Guthrie in it?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
He's amazing. Yeah. Scoot McNary. Get a look at him before something happens to him. Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
That was pretty awesome. Yeah, we had Bernie Sanders on and he was saying that he said Pete Seeger was one of his favorite musicians.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
Probably, dude. Bernie hasn't aged. Nah, Bernie still looks the same. He's the best, dude.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
He's like a real folk hero. Great point. Yeah, Bernie is... He is a folk hero. Yeah, he's folk music. Yeah, and you also forget about like what... Yeah, I mean, that's another thing about the movie. You see the challenge of Bob Dylan, like take on like music and culture.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
There's this whole other cultural thing that's kind of happening in the background, like on the television and the news during the movie.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
Yeah, I was. What does that really look like, a break? Do you go to like a beach and just...
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
Put on a helmet, girl. That was a girl that should not have been. Yeah, you almost ran her over. Yeah, she shouldn't be playing wide out. You know, it's just different. But no, what's it like there? Oh, after the game. So they had like engineers like, how should we take this down? And then there's just drunk kids like, just rip it down.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
Recruiting production assistants. Do you think you would have done it more justice five years earlier? No.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
Yeah. Yeah, I just wonder, yeah, and you get more experience that you can put into something, like you were saying earlier about acting, like you can keep doing it for a long time, you know? Exactly. Yo, can we hear any Bob? Is that a weird thing to ask you, dude? Is that lame? Like live right now? I'll try it. Go for it. All right. Hold on. Let me try it one more time. Hey, who is there?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
Hold on. I got to give it. Get into it, man. Get into it. Hey, who's at the door? That's not it, dude. That's horrible.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
Make up a word. You're verbifying things, and that's what Bob Dylan did.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
Yeah, everything's a glitch, dude. Jon Bon Jovi, it could be anybody. Chet has a new country album that's going to come out this year, too, I think, or next year. Dude, you've got to play Chet.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
I would just do it for the head. Just do it for that. They'll set you up with the best trainers. You've got the HGH. I could do it, man. I'm trying to think if there's anything else that we want to ask or anything else that you wanted to say, Timothy.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
And then they carried it down Broadway, which is like the street you were talking about, the goalposts, because they'd never had it happen. Those kids had never broken a law in their life. Yeah. They even tried to valet park the goalposts at like a restaurant. Is it like an expensive, fancy type school?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
I got to water my plants, dude. I just got home.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
Oh, you do? Is it here? Over in Westwood. And Westwood, all right, I love Westwood. And so, yeah, I get my plants. You go to Diddy Reese? And I forget, yeah, I go over there sometimes. I go walk over there, and sometimes I would go for that, and I would just end up getting a bunch of vapes and just sitting over in my car. But, yeah, sometimes I forget to wash my plants.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
I forget to water my plants, you know? And then I get home, and it's been like a month or something. Your place is ready to be wifified, man. I know. And I always water them. I'll be like, your mother left us. I'll yell shit like that. I'll be like, your mother left us. To who? To the plants. I'll just blame it on their imaginary mother or whatever. I'll be like, we would have been fine. She left.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
I'm just pouring water on them. Their punishment is the water? No, the water is there. I'm giving them the water, but it would have been watered every day if their mother had left us. Oh, so you're bringing out the resentment on the plants. She left us. Who's the mother, Poison Ivy? It's just a fictional woman.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
You'll have a Subaru. Ooh. But I'll take it. You know what? If the family comes with that and that's what it takes, I'll do it. All right. You know, I'll do that. And I appreciate it, Timothy Chalamet. Thanks for all the neat acting, man. Thanks for that. Thanks for the movie about the drug, about... the young man struggling with drugs. Thanks for the movie about Bob Dylan.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
Uh, and just thanks for sharing like what it takes, the commitment that it does take. Cause I do feel that from you. I do feel that the commitment that it really takes, if you really want to take this opportunity and make the most of it in your life, you know, exactly like you're doing.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
Amen, brother. Um, Christmas Day, the movie comes out. You can go watch it in the theaters with your family over the holidays. Perfect, perfect family movie. Will it be in theaters, yeah?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
I mean, I don't think it's a lot of kids that have ever played probably dice in an alley, I would say that. So I would say it's probably pretty decent.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
Huh. Interesting. Dude, thanks for coming in, Timothy. I appreciate it, man.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
Bro, he did a great job. Because they used to have... They used to have... I used to hate them, you know? Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
There's a lot of, yeah, a lot of, yeah, missing, formerly living things started to disappear.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
Well, they used to have incinerators in the buildings. That's what was craziest. Right, right, right. So that the people would put their trash, it would hit the incinerator. And then they would just have, I mean, this is like six or seven years ago, I think, but they would just have soot in barrels, you know, or in cans on the side of the street. And then they started getting bags.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
But he said, yeah, there's been times where a lot of things have shown up. But thank you, man, for checking it out. Yeah. For just hearing it on accident.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
No, it's not at all. We're happy that you're here. And I appreciate it. And you get to do a biopic or biopic.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
And Tallahassee, Florida. Rosemont, Illinois. Winnipeg. And Calgary in the Canada. Get all your tickets at theovon.com slash T-O-U-R. And thank you so much for your support. Today's guest is one of the biggest young acting person, people in the world, acting humans.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
Yeah, biopic does sound fancier. I think that's true. Yeah, biopic. Was it like, so let me think about a question like that. Just so people know, this is about a four or five year period in Bob Dylan's life.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
Yeah, we don't have like a lot of celebrities on, really. You know what I'm saying?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
Yeah, actors get kind of a weird rap, though, because then they also have to be celebrities. In some way, yeah, in some way.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
Yeah. No, I don't think that's man. I think that like you did the movie with the young man with drug addiction with Steve Carell. So yeah, beautiful boy, which was awesome. Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
Yeah, man. And so many people have, and it's like, um, so, um, I don't think there's any doubt in people's mind about your ability to be a bridge between whether it be a story or a person to a new generation or to new listeners or people kind of imbibing it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
I don't even know what that means. Okay, I don't either. I don't even know what that means.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
Yeah, people want to hear it. People want to see it. People want to see, like, a little bit of a journey that they can relate to or hear about it. Yeah, exactly. So about the character, like... So Bob Dylan has, like, such a famous... Because, yeah, a lot of younger generation might not know about him, you know?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
And a lot of... He has such like a... That's a good Bob Dylan, man. Was it? Yeah, that was good. How did you do? When you first decided, because I'm sure you had to practice it in your room or something.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
You've seen him in Dune, Willy Wonka, A Beautiful Boy, and now his new movie, A Complete Unknown, where he plays Bob Dylan in theaters Christmas day. You can check it out. I had a great time getting to know him. He's an enthralling dang human. Today's guest is Timothée Chalamet.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
Oh, I think you have to do that. Yeah, I had to do it, man.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
Hey, snipers down, lay down snipers. Yeah. Um, but was there a moment where you tried that, where you actually tried it?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E551 Timothée Chalamet
There he is right there. Okay. Is that the man?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E557 The Inauguration
There was a young lady and her husband right in front of me who were from Louisiana. That was really cool. She knew my friend Mandy that I used to date and we was friends. It was her friend. I'm sitting next to Danica Patrick from the race car. You know what I'm saying? So you know how I am, bro. I'm trying to meet a wife, dude. She's got a man. No judgment. But yeah, it was great. So I sat by her.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E557 The Inauguration
And she was awesome, dude. We're just climbing around having fun. Oh, I forgot to say this. So right before we start to get into the bus, that's when Conor McGregor rolls up, bro.
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Conor McGregor's dude and this is the fuck you know what I'm saying and this guy comes up and his suit it was like they have perfectly fitted brother like he just fucking just just fucking all like they just like the suit had just been stitched right around him just a second before he walked into our view. And he was just fresh.
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He was just fucking like he'd been just drinking Irish spring soap water. You know, he just looked like he was just fresh out the tap, you know. And he was energetic and he rolls right up, you know. How you going, lad? Hey, class, lad. You know, just nice. Great to meet you. You know, just positive. His energy was just a lot of energy, like a lot of it.
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And it was honestly, it was a lot of good energy that he rolled up with just in right there to the Paul boys. And he didn't know, I guess him and the Pauls had had a confliction online and I didn't know it. I didn't know that. You don't, I'm not in, you don't see me in all the gossip columns and all of that, but they'd had confliction online, grown men arguing on the internet.
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They'd been doing it and no judgment, man. But yeah, he just comes in with his energy. He had his energy up like that. And he just had his energy like that. Like he just found all the pots of gold they'd ever hidden. Fair play boys. And that's how he rolled up, you know, like the fucking it was almost like Notre Dame.
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It's like if he was a guy on the on the little helmet or whatever, you know, on the hat, he was the Notre Dame guy. But he was twice as bad as that fucking little mascot guy they'd had. He could just fucking it's like he had a thousand Joe Joyce's in each one of his hands. And he just had fucking legs strong as the moors, you know? And what are moors? Let me look it up.
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And it's probably maybe six, seven years old or something. And I forgot that I wasn't driving my car at home. Right. In Nashville. So. The other day, I thought my car got stolen. So I called the police or whatever, or, you know, yes, the authorities. They come, the guy, we're standing, I'm like telling him, describing my car, which is a cyber truck. And I know that's alarming.
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I thought it was like a thing. Moors. Moors. The cliffs of Moor. Oh, there you go. And he had legs like the cliffs of Moor. And he rolled up in his head. He just had the energy of a fucking. He had the energy. He just was full of electricity. He really was. He had a voraciousness. You know, his aura was at about 6, 7, 7,000, 8,000. And I'm not even sure what the exchange rate of that is.
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And in British pounds, I think they use them there. What money? do they use in Ireland oh euros yeah oh yeah it's euros or minus buddy we're gonna figure it out but anyway so so that's how he rolled up a lot of electricity but even just dude he knew my name said something nice so I was like You know, I was very just, you know, I was like, holy shit, dude. So then we were we get on the bus. Right.
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So I'm sitting next to Danica Patrick. OK, we're sitting in front of Evander Holyfield, dude. You know, and people used to watch him wrestle. And he is a legend. We're on this bus. And then John Shahidi, Kyle from NELC, and Kyle Faragard. Faragard? Faragard. I'm not sure. Is it Faragard? Faragard. Faragard. Kyle, they call him Kyle.
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Obviously, I can tell why, because people because it's after that, it's fucking you're bothering people. But Kyle from Nelk, right, who looked who looked like he was going to court to not get in trouble for a serious crime, like a business crime, like he looked like.
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dashing he really did the man looked dashing um and oh and then behind them j uh oh and then um alex bruceowitz john shahidi um and then in the back it was jake paul's logan paul behind them Pam, Logan's mom, and Conor McGregor, the fucking Karate Kid of Ireland. And it was just, and it was awkward.
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You could see also on everybody's face, because I guess there'd been issues between the Pauls and the McGregors. They'd been having beef online or whatever. And so they'd been beefing. And so there was issues there and I didn't know it, but so it was just awkward, you know? So I think there was some energy there. But it was also people was they said fair play to each other.
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Both of those sides said fair play to each other, boys. And we're going to have a good day. And we're here for something bigger than bigger than bigger than us, you know, for to witness just a country that has freedom. And so the bus took off, took a while. We probably sat there 40 minutes, a lot of laughter and fun stuff, you know, just crazy, dude.
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I mean, I can't even believe I'm sitting next to you. Hold on. I'm sitting by Evander Holyfield, right? And you could tell he can feel like these other boxers in the back, but we know who the fucking dog is, you know? And I looked at him like, I'm on your team, brother. You know what I'm saying? If shit gets fucking risky out here.
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you know, if things get crazy, you know, then, then you, you know what I'm saying? If he, and he's, you know, he's getting up in years, but if you got to even use me as a white Walker, just to help you get out of here, mate, let us, whatever we got to do, man.
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So, but yeah, but I, I just, I truly can't believe that I'm on this, you know, it's just, it's a, you know, do you find yourself in certain moments where you're like, this is pretty crazy that you're in a moment. Right. And it's just regular people for sure. But if you're like, this is crazy. Like, who did we trick or whatever to get in here, you know? Like, how did we – I don't know.
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I don't know. And we didn't trick anybody, but there's a part – there's just like, yeah. You're like, what are we – you know, one of these things is not like the other. It just seemed like, I don't know. And I'm not trying to say that like in a self pity or like pity me way. I just are like, Oh, I don't deserve to be there. I'm just like, it just was fucking kind of a surprising moment.
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We're all going to a presidential inauguration. I don't know these people. Do you know? I don't know. I mean, I know John Shahidi really well. He's actually a close friend of mine who runs happy dad. And I know who else was it? I, well, I paid for one of Evander's fights before, for sure, when they had early pay-per-view, I know. And I paid for one of Paul's fights.
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And it makes a lot of people sad. And that's OK. But I'm described and it is it's a it's very it's it's like driving like a molar filling for the Statue of Liberty. You just feel like you're driving this huge molar filling for some gigantic thing. But anyway, besides all that. I call the police. I'm telling the guy, took a while, waited probably 40 minutes.
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And I met Jake and Logan, but I don't know them, you know. So, anyway, there we all are. We're on a bus. We get over by the Capitol. And they say, as soon as the thing ends, we have six minutes to get out of the venue and back onto the bus before they're going to shut down certain roads. And that was one of the biggest things.
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All along the outside, when I've been walking towards the hotel and everything, it's probably 10 to 30 degrees or 40 degrees or 34, 6, 7 degrees, right? It's not a ton of degrees, but it's not like no degrees, but it's like some degrees. You know what I'm saying? So...
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but there's military everywhere every you even like you like there'd be military there's like swat team um you know police sheriffs um undercut like a uh marine um every there was people in high there was like like i went to use a mailbox i open it up it's a uh military guy in disguise dressed up like a um male thing like oh fuck you know um he still took two of the letters for me so thank you
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Um, but yeah, everything you just couldn't, you gotta be careful. There was military everywhere. So you couldn't piss outside kind of vibes, you know? Um, anyway, so we're driving, but all the roads, there's like barricades everywhere. There's like trucks that they've just brought into park at all these intersections all around this capital area. Like, like any corner you would pass on the way in.
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Cause we'd circled the entire thing, trying to find a way to get closer to this hotel. So I hadn't had to walk.
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just because it was so brisk out, so the thing, but there was, some of them had cement barricades, some of them just had like a big trucks, some of them had SU war, little war trucks or whatever, it's like a little tank, but with, and they made them for regular people, but they were fucking sad, it was like H Hummers, they had those real Hummers, they had, I
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There was things stopping everywhere and there was military personnel all over or police personnel all over. So anyway, the bus ride takes a while. You got to go through these certain streets. They have these big barricades set up and then you have to kind of like turn the corner and then straighten your bus out to make it through.
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um, these huge, like kind of cage steel, uh, walls that they put up. So the bus can just fit right down the middle of the walls. Like the full intersection is the full street is closed and it's just been narrowed to, um, this one, uh, like the middle lane kind of it. And so that took a Anyway, we pull up outside of the Capitol, probably pretty far off. I'm not sure, maybe 400 yards.
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We start walking. It's a beautiful day. Beautiful. I mean, like, freezing cold, but just picturesque. The sun's hitting you. You can see the Capitol, the American flag, and... it was exciting. All the officers, it seemed they're all wearing like this, the hot, the hot, the cold, um, like head gear. You can just see their eyes or whatever and just their gun or whatever. And that's, and, um,
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Yeah, they look like all, like, kind of dark snowmen. Like, kind of, like, black snowmen, like, a little bit. Because it was just... A lot of them was wearing SWAT gear, tactical. They had everything. They had a fucking gun, handcuff, billy club, Ray-Bans or whatever, you know? Just pepper spray, salt spray. Just fucking, you know, you didn't even know what was going.
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Just, you know, one of them would fucking just throw a grenade full of...
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lemon pepper you know if it got shit got really bad uh so anyway that's you have all the all these officers and everything you go inside let me think right so at the bottom oh there's all these bikes they parked all these bicycles and stuff kind of to make it like you had to go past them and it was a little bit of like a gauntlet kind of it was just odd the different things that they put in place to kind of make it odd to get into places
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I'm telling the officer, explaining the vehicle and stuff. And I reach in my pants. I have car keys, right? I have car keys. And the guy, and I said, well, these are the keys to it. And I gave them to him. And he presses the button and the fucking, dude, the car was like fucking five cars away. I thought that I had, I was driving my Cybertruck. I just forgot.
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so you get inside and then we walked along a hallway and then you start to see military like marines um army colonels generals um sergeants staff sergeant um
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sergeant pepper i think it had everybody in that bitch right they had everybody was there was and they were standing at attention you know and some were at not attention you know the lazy ones or whatever i don't know who they were but they um you know and some people were getting photos i mean if you're rolling with conor mcgregor's they you know people's folk and topped in lot you know that's the most violent tallest leprechaun they ever made right there
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He's a savage, man. And so, yeah, you got him and the Pauls. And so it was kind of nice because I, you know, I was just under the radar. They're all taller and bigger. And so they have more excitement. I just kind of was, you know, I was just, you know, I was kind of in awe of the situation. My buddy... The wildfires got his home, but I'll tell you this.
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He had a fish tank and the fish in it survived, which is pretty unbelievable. But that's just the power of nature and water. It's been estimated that the damages so far from the California fires total more than $250 billion. The loss of life is immeasurable, and the state and city are still in shock.
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There are claims that insurance companies canceled thousands of homeowners' fire policies in the months leading up to the fires. Were those cancellations legal? Could this catastrophe have been avoided? If the wildfires were caused by negligence, someone must be held responsible.
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For more information, go to caliwildfirelawsuit.com slash T-H-E-O. That's C-A-L-I wildfirelawsuit.com slash Theo. To learn more, caliwildfirelawsuit.com slash T-H-E-O. This is a paid advertisement for Morgan & Morgan. Getting your sweat on might seem like hard work, but with Symmetry sauna, it's a work of art.
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So anyway, we go to get – oh, and once they started to open the doors, it was – some areas were kind of first-come, first-served seating. That's what it felt like. So it was kind of rushed. It was like on the – like last Friday or whatever when you got – you know, when they got a bunch of – You know, they got a bunch of kind of basketball wives fighting for those TVs or whatever.
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Like it's for like thanks. Whenever Christmas shopping starts, you know what I'm talking about? So they had that. It was that kind of energy. Everybody's running to get a seat type of energy. And we weren't running, but we're kind of keeping a quick pace, you know. But then we got up in there and we sat down. And they had also with us or by us or whatever was Sam Altman, and he did AI, right?
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And we'd love to get to chat with him and learn about how the world's going to fall apart. You know what I'm saying? We got to at least learn about it a little bit. And then Sam Altman, Alexander Wang, right? And I don't know a lot of Wangs. I don't know any. Okay, there he is. Alexander Wang or Vong. I'm not sure how they do it in... He's New Mexican.
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I thought I was driving my truck and I just, I forgot because I just hadn't been in Los Angeles in so long. And I just forgot that I was driving this Cherokee, the Jeep. So the Jeep, like I'm a multi-car owner. But anyway, absolutely embarrassing and just ridiculous. And just, you know, I was like, I was to describe the vehicle to him. you know, and describe the vehicle.
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So he's kind of the, you know, he's kind of the Asian John Jones, if you will, sort of. But he went to MIT. He's a... Interesting guy. Anyway, he's there. Everybody else was governors, elected officials, rich people, like, you know, people that had cattle or gold, you know, or whatever. And some people don't even call it gold.
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You know, at first, a lot of times they called it f***ing rocks, which is a crazy thing, but I could easily see people calling it that, and that's sad. Anyway... So we all sit down, right? We all sit down and it's a wait, bro. It is like, you know, and there's a lot of military. You got to meet a lot of military folks.
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So just to see all of them in their dress garb, you know, I mean, that was, that was probably one of the coolest things. You're in the Capitol and there's all, everybody's in their garb and it's just very regal, very regal looking. And, uh, yeah. And people were amped and there was fun stuff. And then every now and then you'd shake somebody's hand and they had a wet hand or whatever.
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And you're like, Oh fuck. You know, somebody get this fellow bag of flour. Somebody are just getting one of those, um, uh, pool chalks and let him just chalk his hand up before he shakes again, before he meets somebody, you know? Um, but yeah. And then, so that, that kind of happened. We sat there for a while, probably 30 minutes.
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And then, uh, and so we all slipped off and, uh, just slunk out and got into a special area beneath some stairwells where a lot of the military was back there and they had, they was drinking a chicken broth, hot chocolate and coffee. And the government had given them a little bag with a banana in it. You know, you're like, dear God, these people are putting their lives on the line, right?
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They're here to protect the president and we're fucking... Somebody, I mean, and some of these bananas had been... I don't want to say they had been abused or whatever by their owner or whatever, but they had been trafficked. I don't know how they... But some of the bananas had... They're not going to be put back in circulation. I was surprised some of them were still in circulation.
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Anyway, but the military personnel didn't care, and that was kind of a blast, too. That was probably the highlight of the whole inauguration was seeing all the military folks from all different branches, from police to Army, Navy, SWAT.
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uh sweat there was just some gay guy wearing a sweat shirt sweat on it um who else they had even stolen valor even the people out there in stolen valor you were like you know you were it was an honor all of that just that was something great sorry this story's getting long um So anyway, we got over there and we're just, we hadn't eaten any breakfast, right? I hadn't.
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And so you just, I'm just slurping chicken broth and slurping hot cocoa, you know? And anyway, so that was like a nice excursion from sitting there. We go back to our seats and my chair was bad. I had a bad chair. The chair had been, I don't know. It was probably made in Cherna or whatever. It was been one of those, you know, probably a chair, um,
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Yeah, it was a chair that shouldn't be allowed to chair. They should check these chairs, right? They should breathalyze and whatever they should do. But they did whatever this chair, you know, probably knew somebody or whatever and got in the building. Anyway, it was kind of slagging a little. My chair was kind of like. So when I sit down, I had that fucking lean on me. You know what I'm saying?
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I have some tour dates to let you know about. East Lansing, Michigan, February 27th, we'll be performing there. Victoria, BC in the Canada on March 16th. College Station, Texas. Belton, Texas over there. Oxford, Mississippi in the Hotty Toddy Belt. Tuscaloosa, Alabama, Nashville, Tennessee, my home currently, and maybe forever. We'll see how God... does the zoning in my life.
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So a lot of, and suddenly, as soon as I sat like that, a lot of black people kind of nodded at me because once you have that lean on you, buddy, it's a little bit of a kind of urban respect going on, you know? So I was like, okay, I'm in, I'm here. So we sit down, the congregation starts, the whole evening starts, the inauguration starts. And it's very nice, man.
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I mean, it's just, you know, you're witnessing a piece of history and you get to be there. And it definitely felt like a lot of very regal people and everybody was dressed very well and just fancy. It was a diverse group, it felt like. Yeah. I don't know if that's true. That's, that's crazy to say that part. But it was, it was nice. It was really nice.
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And just like, yeah, just felt lucky to be there. Just to see it. You know, I mean, I was saying this this weekend on Twitter, but, you know, some countries, they can't vote. They don't have voting. You can't go vote. You just live.
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And you feel like you don't have a say in how in the template that you operate in or the the word, the universe that you're set up and you don't have a you don't have a hand to raise ever. Right. but, but yeah, so it was just, it was just, it was, it was wild to see that it was wild to witness it.
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And first of all, when you're describing a cyber truck, you're like, yeah, it looks like a, if you fucking can't, you know, it looks like a UFO that couldn't make it, you know, that's kind of what, you know, it's just very, it's like, you know, it looks like a, like you're driving a sand wedge or something. So just that, that alone is, is bizarre. And then,
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And then just the little things, just like everybody just watching, like all the little things at the inauguration, just the little moments of little glances from the different people. And it's like this whole changing of the guard.
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And it's like this tag team, it's like tagging in, you know, instead of tagging in your partner, it's like tagging in your opponent, which is just such a wild thing to witness in a, in a,
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sport if you look at politics almost like a sport um and so we sat there everything was going pretty smooth and then at some point my chair broke right the chair broke um i fell it fell i just it fell right i fell out i don't know what to say it the chair like might have i don't know what happened right but the chair fell and i fell and it was like oh dude it was the worst right it was embarrassing
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Because at first I thought, oh, people thought I did this, right? Like, I don't do, I don't like physical stuff. I don't like that. Like, I'm not good at that type of stuff. Falling out of a chair, that type of shit, right? That's for fucking clowns or shitty mimes, right? Like, yeah, that's for shitty mimes. That's shitty mime type shit. I don't do that.
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So the chair broke, and then I was like, oh, man. And Sam Altman looked at me. The guy who made AI, bro, he looks at me like – I was like, oh, God. That dude's never going to come on the podcast. I was like, dude, design me a chair right now, bro. I was like, design me some way to get out of this embarrassment, bro. So that was kind of strange.
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And then I got up and and anyway, the thing carried on. We snuck off one more time to get some more stuff because it got long. You know, some of the benediction got a little, you know, they were up there rattling and shit. And then Trump came through. He gave a very long speech in there. You know, I think addressed a lot of different things in there. Yeah.
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that it was kind of like the B sides, like things he maybe didn't want to say in the actual, you know, uh, main part, but he said in there. And then on the way back to the hotel, our bus, uh, kept turning off. It was, um, experience and breakage or whatever, or it was broken. So we got out and just walked like the last few blocks. And that was kind of hectic. Um,
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Just because some of those people are pretty recognizable. And, you know, just a lot of people were coming up pictures and videoing and ask, you know, people from a different place. It was just a lot. It was like a lot of energy. And it was kind of a little scary, you know, like I don't have security. I'm not saying I need security, but you're just out there. You don't know what people are.
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You know, I'm saying you don't know. You just don't know what's going on. So that was a little crazy. Got back to the hotel and. Yeah, went home, went to my hotel, which is maybe a mile away or something, took a nap for a few hours, and then went to the ball later on. And there was some issues about the chair. I ended up like, well, here, let me talk about the ball. So the ball...
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I guess they had a bunch of different balls, and I got a ticket to one ball, right? And it was very nice. It was called the Starlight Ball, and it was beautiful in there. And I got dropped off. You had to get dropped off blocks away. And then they had a very long, like, snake walk that you had to go on to get to the door. And it was probably maybe a 20-minute walk, right? And so it was cold out.
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It was probably 25 degrees or something. So you're walking out there, and I didn't bring a coat, right, because I didn't know – You know, I didn't I didn't I didn't think, I guess. And so I didn't think about a coat and I didn't have a coat. And so we finally get up to the front and they let you in. And it was beautiful. You know, it's nice. It's elegant. The fucking they got curtains.
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I was like, yeah, I don't know what happened. I ran inside here for a little bit, and I came out, and it was gone. So I'm telling that, and then I have the keys, and then I think that's where my glitch was. I was like, yeah, and I guess I still have the keys, and I give them to him. He fucking presses the thing, the keys to my Jeep, and bam, it's fucking right there. So anyway, whatever.
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They got carp. The curtains were some curtains was 80 feet long, 90 feet. 45, 75 feet long, baby. They had curtains that had carpet on them. Like these bitches, they had everything in there. The craziest thing I saw, they had a ceiling fan. It must have been 150 feet up in the air, dude. I was like, what? How would you do it?
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And so I kind of was like looking for the switch for that low key for a while. Let me see. Inside of the ball, I got to see some people that I knew. Joe Rogan was in there. Mayor Ernie Johnson. Who's the guy? Speaker of the House, maybe.
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Mike Johnson, baby. Got to talk to him. He's from Shreveport, Louisiana. He had a great sense of humor. We got to joke around a little bit. He had a few of his children with him. Got to talk with them. Wayne Gretzky was in there, the great one. I saw him. Dude, Wayne Gretzky had lost his tooth in there. My tooth got chipped, right? My tooth got chipped or something on a hard appetizer, right?
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So Wayne's in there. I told him that. He goes...
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like that showed me his mouth he's missing a whole tooth dude you know runaway train never going back he had that bitch just gone dude i mean he's a hockey player so yeah um but then they're like looking on the floor for the tooth so for probably 10 minutes i'm helping him and his wife and somebody else like a i don't know if it was a dentist or whatever but a dental assistant basically i think it was just a dude that liked guys or whatever
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but he was trying to help look for it. And then, um, so we're looking for Wayne Gretzky's tooth. Okay. And I think he's like, yeah, I think I, I think he, I, at one point I thought he said he had a couple, he usually kept a couple extra on him, you know, cause this is a hockey guy. These guys, you know, you'll go to bed, they'll have their wedding ring and a tooth on the nightstand.
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You know, that's just the kind of guys they are, you know? Um, So, yeah, he just had that empty net up top. But it was hilarious, dude. We laughed and we took a nice photo together, me, him, Mike Johnson. And then I started getting some social anxiety in there that was a little bit hectic. And what else was it? I mean, it's just like a couple thousand people.
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And you can't be like, hey, have you seen Wayne Gretzky's tooth? So I would do that a couple times. I was like, hey, have you seen Wayne Gretzky's tooth? And I think a lot of people thought it was a euphemism for something or whatever. It was kind of like something like that. But yeah, anyway, I don't know if they found it or not. I got to touch base with them. But what a legend, dude.
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What a legend, bro. That was awesome. So that kind of made my night, I think. Yeah. What else? I saw Tony Henscliff and Jeff Ross, and we joked around for about a half hour over by the desserts.
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The things that I did not enjoy, to be honest with you, no judgment, but these are just things that what it was like, there was only probably 25 chairs in the whole place for probably, I don't know, maybe it's 2000 people in there or something, 1600 people. Right. Is that the right amount of people? Maybe 1,000 people. So they only probably, they might have had 40 chairs, right?
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That's where I'm at. Um, what else? Let's get into it, man. I just got back from the inauguration in the USA and I was, uh, let's play some, let's play, let's lead into it with a little instrumental.
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See people rush in, fly in. Just for that damn 18 square inches of real estate, boy. For that ass real estate, baby, that chair. Who else? Sean O'Brien, I saw, the Teamsters Union president who came on to the podcast once. Who else did I get to see or not see? Oh, Ben Shapiro, I saw. I didn't get to talk to him. Jake and Logan, I saw.
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I'm leaving some people out, but it was just a lot, and I was kind of burnt out. It was just like a lot of meeting people, and it was just a lot of energy. So then at one point, I ended up leaving. And at the same time, Lex Friedman was leaving. He does podcasting. I'd never seen him before. And we talked.
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We walked for about 20 minutes and then caught an Uber for about 15 minutes and just laughed, had a good chat. Yeah. And that was that was it. That was the whole deal. I didn't get to see I didn't get to meet anybody of the cabinet or anything like that. And I didn't get to see Barron Trump. I didn't get to see Barron, bro. B-Dawg, bro. You hear me? I didn't get to see Barron Trump.
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That would have been something nice to meet that man. That's a young man you want to meet. You know what I'm saying? He just, he's that. He just is. He's that freaking seer. He's that seer, baby. He's the Lord's lookout, baby. You know what I'm saying? He is. He's that crow's nest of society right there. And so, yeah, that was probably a bummer.
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I didn't get to see Bobby Kennedy Jr., who's a friend of mine. That would have been really nice. I thought Melania looked really nice and gangster at the same time. Beautiful gangster vibe. I got to see J.D. Vance's wife. Just see her. That's really beautiful. A lot of they I think she's the first Indian second lady in time ever that we've ever had Indian American.
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And if you've never met an Indian person, go meet one this year. I say that wholeheartedly. I met a couple Indian people last year and I'm still enjoying the benefits of that. It's great. That's been great. So if you haven't met someone like that, that's a great person to meet. What else? There was some... Oh, Tim Kennedy.
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I got to see, I just met him week before and I wish I couldn't find his number. I was going to try to meet up with him. It was so hard to go from one thing to the next. I was like, once you got somewhere, you were kind of there. There was just a lot. It was very tough to kind of move about in the city. Um, what else? Um,
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You all know I like to keep things cool, even in the winter, and nothing is cooler than a Blue Cube cold plunge. I'm fortunate enough to have one at home, and let me tell you, it's like baptizing your soul, baby. Get in that little crispy bucket, baby. It gets rid of them demons we all have and makes you feel great for seven or eight hours afterwards. It's good.
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My buddy Thomas Schiffer, the genius behind Blue Cube, and I go way back, and he just launched a presale for their new stand-up cold plunges. Wow. These things are the Cadillacs of cold plunge therapy. American-made, full immersion, weatherproof frames, and built like a Sherman tank. I'll say this, they are built well.
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And because you're listening to me, you can get a sweet discount when you mention my name. That's right. Just tell them Theo sent you and they'll knock a good bit off the price. So if you're ready to boost your metabolism, eliminate inflation and blast away your anxiety, give them a call. Head over to their website, bluecubebaths.com, and dive into the details.
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Opt in on their website or give them a call. I am grateful for the one that I have, and I feel honestly thankful to be able to have one. I know they're not in everybody's price range, and that's understandable. But at the same time, I want to support my friend and his amazing company. Is pornography causing a problem in your life?
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Do you find yourself watching porno for longer periods of time and having trouble stopping? Is porn affecting your relationship or dating life? Well, you're certainly not alone. Watching pornography has become so commonplace today, and oftentimes men use porn to numb the pain of loneliness, boredom, anxiety, and depression.
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Shame and stigma prevent men from talking about these issues and getting help for them. I want to introduce you to my friend Steve. Steve is the founder of Valor Recovery, a program to help men overcome porn abuse and sexual compulsivity.
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Steve is a long-term sexual recovery member and has personally overcame the emotional and spiritual despair of abusing pornography and has dedicated his life to empowering men to do the same. Steve is an amazing person and he is a close friend of mine. I mean that. Valor Recovery helps men to develop the tools necessary to have a healthier sex life.
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Their coaches are in long-term recovery and will be your partner, mentor, and spiritual guide to transcend these problematic behaviors. To learn more about Valor Recovery, please visit them at www.valorrecoverycoaching.com or email them at admin at valor recovery coaching.com. Thank you. Yeah.
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And I think my biggest takeaway was just that things, it's just changing, you know, it's like, um, just that things are kind of different, you know, like I couldn't believe that they, that we got to be at something like that, but I think that's just how the world is getting. Everything's kind of evening out.
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Inauguration. Very beautiful. That's Canon in D major right there. If you're into that sort of thing. Yeah, I was just I took a red eye flight. And so I got in probably 630 in the morning, had to get dressed in the car and took this suit that I have on, got dressed in the car, went to got dropped off at a hotel. Right. And you couldn't you couldn't go within like five blocks of the hotel.
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You know, I don't really believe that there's like, it doesn't really feel like it almost feels like there's not even really famous people. Everybody feels a little famous cause everybody is able to kind of promote themselves if they want. Um, you know, what used to be like media that felt like it was kept from people or controlled.
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It just feels like, um, it's just there now and you can make your own decisions based on, uh, how you're consuming or who you're consuming stuff through, I guess. Um, I don't know. I guess I don't have, like, a lot of macro-level pictures of that kind of stuff. But just to get to meet Sam Altman, dude, the AI guy, like, what? And then there was just more – just, like, yeah, it was fascinating.
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I wish I had had – I was kind of burnt out. I – it was very magnificent and had, like, a – you know, a Cinderella type energy and stuff. I'm just glad that I got to go to it. I couldn't believe that. There was a thing where, you know, I thought Jake and Logan, I thought Logan and Jake were messing with me. They had videotaped, they were vlogging from the get, right?
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And I never spent much time around them, you know, and I know that they're really successful and Uh, and they're, I mean, they're war, they're, they're tough guys. Those are tough guys, right? No doubt. So anyway, they put a clip of, I fell out the chair, dude. And I didn't do, I didn't know. I knew that the chair had been bad. The chair was faulty. It was a faulty chair.
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I don't know if that was CIA or whatever. I have no idea. No idea how, you know, if there was a plan there. But anyway, the chair was faulty. But then afterwards, somebody said that they were fooling with the chair, you know. And so part of my brain was like, oh, were they – Did they do something with it to egg it on, you know? Like, you know what I'm saying?
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If you see somebody who's, like, leaning on a crutch or whatever, and then you bar their crutch, you know, you leave town. You know, because you got priors or whatever, and then they fucking, they take that L, baby, that gravity L, baby, they fall. So I just didn't know. So I got in kind of this skeptical place.
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And I should have just checked in with Logan about it, I guess, but they were recording everything. So I didn't know if they were going to record it or whatever. And I just I hadn't been around him that much, you know, and I didn't I think I get nervous around like vlogging type of things because it feels like you're there. Somebody could be setting you up or something.
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I'm just not that familiar with that universe. Uh, and then later in the day, um, Logan Paul's made a video where he said, uh, he made a challenge about, uh, oh, he said, if I was going to put you through something, I'd put you through a table, you know, not a chair. Cause he is a wrestler. He's a WWE wrestler. I believe he's been a champion too. Hasn't he? Let me see.
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Yeah, he was the WWE champion from November 2023 to August 3rd, 2024. So, yeah. So, I thought he, you know... So, I thought that he wanted... That he was, you know... Then I thought he was creating like an online hype about it, you know? I thought he was calling out the Rat King, you know? And if you want... If you want the smoke, baby, I'll fill your lungs. You hear me?
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So that's where I was at. And then we ended up talking in the morning and I just I should have probably communicate. That was my my my part. And it was I didn't communicate better. And they weren't, they didn't do anything. They were recording, the chair fell, and it was ridiculous. And then they weren't trying to, they weren't trying to wrestle. I used to watch you wrestle.
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They weren't trying to wrestle. And so, yeah, so no hard feelings there. Yeah, some just self-responsibility. I think it was just a little bit of a, miscommunication and just not knowing each other, maybe not knowing each other's energy some. Um, and I'll say this too, honestly, I had a great time hanging out with them because we also had had a great time that weekend.
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They were probably two of the guys, um, Yeah, we just – just joking around. I got to see how they interact with their mother, and I thought that that was very sweet, to be honest with you. No home – no ditty or whatever, you know, just like the way – and it was just all real genuine. You know, you could tell that they have –
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Yeah, you could just tell the affinity that they have for their mother and the same for them. Because a lot of families that grow up where the children are famous and stuff, they don't have the same fortune. They don't have the same good fortune. So that was really cool, actually. I admired that about them. Yeah, some...
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this honky Zen monkey rolled up on me at the hotel at one point and was kind of just like, he was just kind of trying to say stuff to me and just, he was drunk. Right. And he was just kind of kept spitting a lot. And it was just a lot for me. And he was just, his, his energy was super clear. He was like right up in my face kind of. And I told him I didn't want to really talk.
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I was just, it had been a long day or whatever. And then he kept, he kept coming up and uh logan uh and jake both kind of just formed just put a damn trump wall right there in front of me uh and um i didn't need to be rescued but i'm kind of glad they stepped in because it could have got a little weird you know i was kind of my i was on edge a little um
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You know, I just hadn't hit a meeting in a while. Just shit like that. You know, I just got to take care of my own shit a little bit better. But, so yeah, what I'm saying is, and nobody asked me to say this, you know, we just, Logan and I had a call the other day. That shit was just confusion. And, yeah, that was just confusion. And then, yeah, I'm actually glad I got to,
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I'm glad I got to get to know them better, to be honest with you. It was kind of a joy of the weekend. And what else was nice? I mean, it was all just crazy just to even, even just to like stand around a Vander Holyfield and you're just like, welcome to be around him. Right. There's not like he doesn't have, there's no, neither one of y'all needs to walk off cause you're both in the same group.
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You had there. You couldn't drive up to it. So got dropped off. So when it's walking and it's cold, you know, when you're like, you know, you're hurrying because we had to get there by a certain time by 8 a.m. to make sure that I could be like legit or whatever. So I guess, so I'm changing in this thing and I didn't know the man, the man, the driver of the car that picked me up.
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It was like, you were at a field trip. That was it. That's what it was like. It was like when you were kids at a field trip and it was like, okay, this is the B group and this is your chaperone or this is the L group and this is your chaperone. And so that was us. We had eight or nine of us. We had our chaperone. Um,
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And we were just, you know, we were just learning about civics and getting to see some of it firsthand. And we really did, like, laugh. It was a fucking blast, dude. And, yeah, I think maybe part of me, I wish they'd have asked if they'd have put the clip of falling of the chair out or whatever. But in the end, it's okay. It's all good. You know, I don't have any ill thoughts towards them.
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You know, I... Yeah, I thought that they were I thought they were cool guys. Maybe I need to quit saying that, dude. Obviously, they're both married and I like women. But but yeah, I kind of wish we would have fucking took that. I kind of wish we would have took it to the ring.
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You know, I think there was a part of me that that was hoping, you know, because, you know, the rat king, baby, I'll put him in the frickin mozzarella wheelchair, baby. You feel me? My finishing move is the tax evasion, baby. So, but that's every kid's dream to get in there and get body slammed and lose a vertebra, you know, in a sold out arena in Charlotte. I mean, you know, we can all dream.
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But, yeah, I'm just glad I got to go to the inauguration. I would have gone. You can't miss it. You couldn't miss it if you got to go. And I just feel lucky that I got to go.
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And so thank you to Alex Bruchowitz for taking me, for John Shahidi, my buddy who's been super supportive and helps me a lot and helped me get to do the political podcast last year and just to learn about some things that I care about, you know. And, yeah. And just different politicians and how it works. It's like, I've learned a lot in the past year, to be honest with you.
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I think anyway, you know, I think I have. And so, yeah, wish I'd have gotten to meet Barron. Wish I'd have gotten to see Bobby Kennedy.
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um some people gave me a hard time about going to the inauguration or supporting a party or whatever i don't think about all i you know i don't i i support i do what i want to do for me and you can do what you want to do for you you know and um but nobody owns my support nobody owns my support for anything. I don't think, you know, except maybe my family.
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Um, and even then I can, even then I'll keep it away from them sometimes. So, um, I don't know about what else. Let's take a call that came in. Here we go.
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This is Judy. Hey, Judy. Sorry. My buddy used to say that all the time. Uh, carry on Judy onward. Thank you for calling.
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Oh, yes. Mike Johnson country. And, you know, he's Speaker of the House. And I liked his attitude. I liked his energy. You know, and I'm curious to see what this whole new camp, what they do in there. I'm curious to see, you know, because it's a motley, it's a motley group that they got going in there. And I want to get to meet some of them.
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I want to get to talk to some of them and learn some stuff, you know, and also ask them, ask them some promises. You're going to do this. You can do this. And then we can see if we can hold them to it. If we get to keep podcasting for years, we'll be able to hold them to it. Hey, you said you were going to get to do this. Why didn't it happen or why did it happen?
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You know, so that kind of stuff really intrigues me. You know, are we going to get lobbyists and foreign countries and APACs and all these different people out from interfering with our candidates and interfering with our lobbies? Or how does it work? And also, am I just delusional and I just don't know the whole system? And. And if that's the case, then educate me on it.
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Because there's also just a cost of doing business in some things, you know? Like sometimes there's a cost of doing business. You know, like you could go set up a fruit stand or something or a little... little watermelon stand or something, a little banana shop or something on the corner of a street. You could do that. But you have to pay a permit, right? You have to.
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He was a, he was from a, like a United Nations area or whatever. You know what I'm saying? He, this guy was a, he, we probably got him in a trade or something. I don't know how he got him. But he didn't, uh, speak a lot of English and that's okay. And I didn't speak a lot of his language. So we just were, you know, we were different. We were verbally kind of different people.
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It's just the cost of doing business. So sometimes I wonder if there's, you know, what the truth is out there. I want to learn more about that. Let's hear more. Sorry.
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Well, thanks, ma'am, or young lady. Yeah, thank you, miss. I appreciate that. Yeah, Theo Vaughn went to Washington, I guess. Fievel goes west or whatever. Fievel goes to Section 8. That's going to be – maybe I'll be able to be in that. Yeah, but Fievel was a mouse, dude, and he went west. And we're the rats, baby, and we went east. But thank you for thinking of me.
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Yeah, I was thinking about that, too. I was like, how can I not go, you know? So, yeah, thank you. Let's hear more, miss.
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Well, thank you. Thank you. That's sweet of you to say that. That's nice of you to say. You know, I did. I thought about my teachers from growing up. I thought about my mom. I didn't steal, but I took a couple extra napkins because I know my best friend's mom is going to want one. My mom's going to want one probably. Yeah.
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Yeah, there's a teacher or two if I get to see them again that I would like to give them to. Just little things like that. Yeah, and to see things you like and don't like. You get to witness like, okay, there's some stuff here that I feel like this. There's some stuff here that I feel like that. Yeah, I felt like, I don't know. I just couldn't believe it.
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You know, to be real honest with you, I just couldn't believe it. you know, I just couldn't believe that I was sitting in there and I'm at the damn, you know, this is like the, they're doing the, the inauguration, you know? And, and then the chair broke and I'm like, oh, and you're on the floor and you're like, oh, this isn't good.
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And then you just, I thought I'd, I was like, please let me fall through to another world or whatever. Like I looked over at Sam Altman and I was like, designer, you know, I was like, send me into the matrix right now, man. You know, don't make me have to just get up and just be human. So that was a lot. I don't know. Was it a lot? But anyway, it is just is what it is, man.
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And the best part of it was some rich lady scoffed at me. It's like, whoa, whoa, whoa. As if she had to watch one of her own dogs shit. You know, those people that are really rich, they have someone else walk their dogs. So they never really know that their dogs shit or whatever. She was like, whoa, God. She like grabbed her husband's arm or something. I'm like, yeah, you got it right.
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You sitting in the wrong section. You in section eight, boo boo. These chairs busted as hell, brother. So maybe we'll start making our chairs in fucking America again. I don't know. Maybe we'll start taking some pride in the things that we built, that we build, you know? I don't know. I wonder what the future is going to be like. You know, I wonder. And if we're strong enough, man, it's weird.
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It's like the things that I feel like are bad for me, sometimes it's hard to stay away from. It's hard to keep using them. You know, it's just interesting. Interesting. But I'm just happy I get to be alive and play the game every day. Sometimes I play it pretty good. Sometimes I don't. Sometimes my attitude sucks. Like, yeah, dude, I was at the ball or whatever.
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And so anyway, I'm like, and I've never, you know, I'd have to change in this car. And so it was just like, um, Yeah, it's weird. First of all, I had to change down to complete nudity, you know, down to just, you know, just under the Lord's matte finish. You know what I'm talking about? Maybe that first layer. And so it was just a lot, you know. So anyway, that happened. And, um.
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And the desserts, dude, I was just – I wanted to get a drink or something. And then I was like, I'm not drinking, you know. I'm not doing it. I've just been – I was just like – I was kind of going through it. And so I fucking said I'm going to get me some desserts, right? Because sometimes if you want to drink, to stop that craving, you get you some desserts.
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So I tongue down a couple of Petit Fours. Baby, let me bring up a picture of one of them. God, they're good. They're beautiful. They're good if they're good. But when they're not, they're just a waste of your fucking calories. Petit Four. And I'm the kind of guy, I'll put something in my mouth, and if I decide once it's in there that it ain't worth it, you're going to get that shit back, honey.
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I'll put that shit in a napkin, baby, and hide a little doggie bag somewhere behind a plant or something. I don't give a damn. I'll fucking feed that bitch to a sofa cushion after I take it out of my mouth. I don't give a damn. Because I don't eat bullshit sugars, dog. A petit four, also known as mignardesis, mignardesis, is a small bite-sized confectionary or savory appetizer.
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The name is French, petit four, meaning small oven. That's small oven, baby. You know what I'm saying, huh? Damn, boy. And Wayne Gretzky lost that frickin'... He was spitting chiclets, dude. Shout out to them. I'm upstairs, baby. The Lord installed a window on his smile, baby. He had that thing going. And shout out Wayne, man. We talked about his family, and I'm just clowning. He knows.
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He had a great sense of humor. Uh, he's like, yeah, usually I got a couple extra. I keep on me. Oh, but just moments like that. You're talking to the greatest hockey player in the world and he's asking you how you're doing. And then you're just helping somebody look for a tooth in a fucking nice room. It's just like, it's just a shit you kind of always dreamed about, I guess, you know?
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Um, let me see if there's one more question. Any questions you guys had Nick or Zach?
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Can you hear me? You notice anything on your mind about the election? Was there anything?
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Yeah, I think that's something, you know, I think that's a big thing for me is that, hey, how do you get more parties? Because I feel like if they're. You know, if you if they're just. We need more teams. It'd be more exciting. You know, and I know there are more. People are like, there's the Green Party. I know that. Let me see. How many political... Just so we know.
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Some of you guys are like, this idiot. You don't know. The electoral system in the U.S. is called a two-party system. That means two parties dominate the political field. Um... The two largest parties. OK, minor parties, there's the obviously. So then you have Democratic and Republican. Those are your two major. Your minor parties are the Libertarian Party was founded December 11th, 1972.
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As of March 2021, it is the largest third party in the United States. Claiming nearly 700,000 registered voters across 28 states. The Green Party, you know what I'm saying?
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The Green Party has been active as a third party since the 1980s. You know what I'm talking about. Cheech and Chong, homie. That's what's up, baby. Dope as your love. The party first gained widespread public attention during Ralph Nader's second presidential run in 2000. Okay, okay. and then the constitution party is a national conservative political party in the United States.
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And so anyway, we get – like you can only get within five blocks of this hotel to where I had to go check in by 8 a.m. And it was called Hotel Wilfred. Hotel Wilfred. Wrote it down. And it was fancy. I mean you go in and there's like a – like somebody has a trumpet or whatever. They're not even playing it, but they're holding it or whatever. Like a guy standing by the door.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E557 The Inauguration
It was founded in the U S tax as the U S taxpayers party in 1992 by Howard Phillips. It was also the Alliance party is a centrist American political party was formed in 2018 and registered in 2019 and the Vermont progressive party. So that are, those are three, four, five other parties. That's pretty cool. I would love to just talk to Bernie Sanders again.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E557 The Inauguration
You know, that would be something nice this year to learn a little bit more about some stuff. Um, yeah, I'm just, I think I've gotten more curious this year. I feel more curious. Um, and then just, yeah, some things I want to do this year, try and be better to my friends. Uh, I think I can do it and just take more time. It's not in my own world and think about other people's worlds.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E557 The Inauguration
That's one thing that keeps me. Sometimes I just get stuck in my own world. And then it's not that I'm not thinking about others. It's just I'm thinking about me too much or some things I have to do. Right. So there's some goals of mine. Anyway, sorry to ramble. Anything else? Any other? Nick, did you have a question? Anything come to mind? I know Zach had it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E557 The Inauguration
Yeah, that's the thing. Sometimes change is good. You don't know. You know, it's like Bobby Kennedy. People said he was a witch doctor or whatever. People said he was – what were some of the things you heard? Oh, he worked for Frankenstein. You would hear all of that or whatever. Yeah. You know, people would say he has a bus full of like frogs with band-aids on him and shit like that.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E557 The Inauguration
And like bears that are missing arms or whatever. And yeah, yeah, he's definitely, you know, he's had some weird instances with some roadkill. I'll agree to that. But it's a mystery. I like something new. I like, let's try this. Let's try this. So. All right. Blessings to you guys. Thanks for listening to me ramble about the inauguration. Thanks for being a part of the podcast.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E557 The Inauguration
As always, the hotline is 985-664-9503. What was the call in thing that we spoke about earlier? Nick, do you remember about one of them we talked about? That would be a good call in thing.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E557 The Inauguration
Oh, yeah. That's what it was. One thing that happened was I was at the inauguration, you know, and I was there, right? And so I go into the restroom, right? Typical, you know, restroom user. That's who I am. So I go in there and you start... There's only a couple of sounds that you hear in the bathroom that you that are kind of acceptable. Right.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E557 The Inauguration
You know, you you'll accept a lot of sounds in a bathroom. You're like, OK. You're like, oh, all right. But OK. You know, and then sometimes you hear some stuff and you do a quick prayer for somebody or something. But there's only a few sounds. But somebody was in there.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E557 The Inauguration
either i don't want to say doing you know cocaine maybe or or just breathing short really fast every now and then so that kind of blew my mind but it just goes to show you that you never know when somebody you know is getting tooted up on the gear you know what i'm saying big randy you never know so All right, a little bit more American Inauguration music on the way out.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E557 The Inauguration
But, yeah, you can hit the hotline, 985-664-9503. Let us know something you've seen in a bathroom that's been strange over the years, something that's kind of shocked you or really, you know, you thought to yourself, okay, that's different right there. 985-664-9503. Praise God, baby, I'm upstairs. And if anybody finds Wayne Gretzky's tooth, you guys hit the hotline. You know that.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E557 The Inauguration
And we'll get that install done for them up there. But you guys be well, man. Thank you, guys. Amen.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E557 The Inauguration
And there's some guy whose job he stands outside. His only job is to just be cold. He just looks cold. He's like, you know, it's like a nice place. It's like a place you would see on Home Alone where he goes, where Kevin goes. But yeah, there's a guy out front. His job is just to get cold for the rich people inside so they don't have to do that, right?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E557 The Inauguration
You guys be good to yourselves, baby. You deserve it. Gang.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E557 The Inauguration
So he's just outside just being fucking freezing. That guy was out there, dude. And so I go inside and there's nice carpet and everything. And this wasn't where I was staying. This place was probably – I don't even know how much it was. But they wouldn't – like it was a lot. But anyway, everything had carpet. The walls had carpet. The ceiling had carpet.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E557 The Inauguration
Everything had kind of flooring or whatever, everything. But very fancy, like pictures of – Like rich, somebody rich eating something, you know, like, oh, sirloin or whatever. So anyway, all that shit. So go in there and ask to use the restroom. They had a guy like the place was nice. They had a guy who was just looking at you who looked like.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E557 The Inauguration
Winnipeg in the Canada and Calgary in the Canada right there. Get all your tickets at theovon.com slash T-O-U-R. Thank you so much for your support. And this is still the Return of the Rat Tour. I think we're going to end this tour at some point this year, but that's the one it is for now. Thank you. Good day, sir. I said good day. It's been a week. It's been a week. What's been happening?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E557 The Inauguration
do we let this dude use our toilets type of dude, you know, like kind of like a shit bouncer or whatever they call it, you know, just a dude. And he looked at me and I could tell he was like visually on the fence. Right. But then I kind of gave him like a, you know, I can handle it type of thing, you know, and then I went in the bathroom. I'm in there changing or whatever. And
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E557 The Inauguration
I'm in there getting my toothbrush, get toothbrush and put some lotion on my arms and legs, right? Because, yeah, because I didn't want to, you know, it was winter time and I get pretty chapped out. So anyway, I go and I meet our group in the lobby and I meet up. There's a guy named Alex Brusiewicz and he was the guy who got us in to be able to go.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E557 The Inauguration
And he was a guy also who, yeah, his last name, I think Brusiewicz, I don't know. It's letters that don't even fucking know each other, right? It's like, you could tell some of the letters, if you write it out, you're like, oh, these bitches, they never even... These letters don't know each other, you know?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E557 The Inauguration
And if you look on the faces of some of the letters, if you had them lined up, you see some of the letters like, I don't, I don't know this guy, you know, point at the letter next to him or whatever. Yeah. Brooks, Brooks, Brooks, Brooks, Brooks, Brooks, Brooks, something like that. Anyway, I get there. This is the people that is in the group. Okay. It is, um, It is Kyle from Nelk Boys, right?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E557 The Inauguration
John Shahidi from Shots and Happy Dad. Jake Pauls, Logan Pauls. Who else? Let me think. Jake Pauls, Logan Pauls. Pam Pauls. Pam Pauls. Pam Logan Pauls. Let me see. Logan Paul's mom is called Pam. And then Connor McGregor and Evander Holyfield and Danica Patrick. Right. The race car. You know, she was like at first they had like Princess and Mario Kart. And then right after that, they had.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E557 The Inauguration
uh, Danica Patrick. So, you know, one of only two female racers ever. So anyway, that is our group. That's our group. Right. And like, I don't even know. Let me see. I'd never, I'd met Evander's one time. Okay. So I'd met event. I'll tell you this story. I met Evander's. So Evander's is, uh,
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E557 The Inauguration
One time I'm at an airport, I think it's Chicago, and they had a McDaniels right there, and they had it all. You know what I'm talking about. They got it all, baby. They got the McDouble, the Whopper, the Nuggets, the McNuggets, everything, you know. They got it all, the McFlurry, you know, the ice cream machines down. Turn it on, Jack. That bitch ain't broken.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E557 The Inauguration
Um, anyway, so one time I'm at the Chicago airport, I see, uh, Evander's Holyfield sitting right there. He was at a table by himself. He had himself, he got himself a medium fry. Okay. And I'll, you know, I'm the kind of guy that who, I guess I'm the kind of guy who, if I'm walking by and I see Evander's Holyfield eating a medium fry, I'm going to stop and watch him.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E557 The Inauguration
You know, and you don't know you're that type of guy until you're that type of guy. So I'm walking by. I see the fry. I see the Holyfield. Bam, brother. You know what I'm saying? It's the fucking thriller for Vanilla McFlurry. You know what I'm saying? Like, I just had to watch this. So Evander's is sitting there, he's putting fries into his mouth.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E557 The Inauguration
And he'd been, over the years, he's accumulated a lot of punches to his face, right? And that's no, that's historical facts. So some of the fries, he wasn't even opening his mouth, right? He was just pushing them through, just pushing them through the, you know, that pantomouth canal, baby, that, you know, through his face, through his mouth, just putting them in.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E557 The Inauguration
And there was a girl who had been working at the Cinnabon down about maybe 70 yards, okay? They had a Cinnabon about 70 yards down the terminal. And I saw her run up. I saw her run up. And she stopped right in front of Evander's. And he's there. He's halfway through the fourth round of a fucking medium fry. And this girl runs right up, dude.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E557 The Inauguration
Oh, this. Good day. First of all, let me say that to you. And this is the day that we have been given. And... Yeah, and I'm happy to be here and alive with you today on planet Earth at this time in existence. And here we are. What is going on? Oh, this, I freaking, I'm in Los Angeles, right? And I forgot that I have a Jeep Cherokee out here.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E557 The Inauguration
And you could tell she was she'd left the counter unattended. I'm not trying to rat anybody out, but this was a young sister and she'd left the counter unattended. Chicago Airport, probably nine years ago. Right. Probably 7 p.m. She runs down. She points right at Evander's and she says, oh, I used to watch you wrestle. I used to watch you wrestle.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E557 The Inauguration
So it just goes to show you can work your whole life doing something and somebody just, they don't know. People don't know. They think you rassle. You could be one of the greatest heavyweights of all time, and somebody thinks you are Coco Beware, right? Somebody thinks you should have a bird on your shoulder. It is what it is. No shade to any of those men. So anyway, that's the group, dude.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E557 The Inauguration
So now I'm getting on. So you had to go outside. I asked the people at the front desk of the Willard Hotel. Nice, bro. Them bitches, damn. Like, it was old, too. Like, they had ghosts, I bet. And even the ghosts would have a fucking wallet on them. That's how rich people are. You see a ghost in there, and he'd be, you know, he'd be like, Ooh, I'm rich, motherfucker. He wasn't even scaring people.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E557 The Inauguration
He's like, that's from fucking poor ghost, homie. He was at the strip club, dude. You know? Okay, so we get to the back of the bus. We sit down. Oh, so as we're going to get outside to get onto the bus, that's like leaving the hotel. We go out of the area. Now they have like Secret Service and everything is very show your ID.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E557 The Inauguration
Like every 30 feet, you're showing your ID to somebody, letting somebody look at you, look at you. You know, some people touching your glands, the sides of your neck or whatever. Somebody's asking you who your mother is, you know, that kind of shit. So, yeah, there's just somebody like every 30 feet, you're clocking in with somebody.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E557 The Inauguration
Every 30 feet, you're showing your credentials, showing that wristband, arm, neck brace, everything. They had all kind of wrist brace, neck brace, back brace, everything they had, arm band, neck band. Fucking they had so many things you had to show to get keep going, to keep moving on. So get on the bus. It's a full bus.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
We want to let you know that today's conversation may be a bit graphic for some or gruesome. It's containing law enforcement and some of their involvement just with society. So if you don't like that sort of thing, you may not want to listen. Today's guest is a retired sergeant from the Las Vegas Metropolitan Police Department and a former crisis negotiator.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
Like were there times you get called to hotel rooms? Like, I'm just trying to think of like, take me on like a specific call if you can. Um, so you don't, I'm not saying name celebrities and I don't need that, but I'm just saying like, yeah, take me on like a call where things are like, you know, I'm just kind of curious as to the level of, um,
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
Like just the things you would see, because it's Vegas. You know, it's the craziest place on earth. So here's a story, and it's a sad story. Do I sound demanding about that?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
Yeah. So he's just sitting in the back getting a butt job? And what do you do? Do you go in there? Are you wearing like a shades? Are you hiding in the distance? What are you doing?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
It's just kind of gross. I don't clean the place up. There it is right there. Oh, the flick? You can still see the flick? Yep, that flick.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
Brush his teeth, put lotion on his limbs or whatever.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
Yeah, dude. That's, yeah. Sometimes I think like, like, um, I have like a moment each day kind of where it's like, Sometimes it is kind of putting on your socks. You're like, what if this is the last day? You know, I think because that's one of the moments you're kind of suiting up for the day. I'll have moments like that.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
Yeah, what is that kind of, I guess if you see a lot of death, how does that change your perspective or do you think it does for officers or even just you personally?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
He needs an escape. Yeah. What do you want to sit here and look and keep taking the guy's pulse? Or yeah, it would be hard. It would be crazy if he's sitting there. Yeah. I mean, anything else besides trying to occupy his brain.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
So that's a recall. So we got to recall back out to so-and-so.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
Yeah. I think it's hard for children to learn that. I think one of the things that I think, I don't have any children. I've been a child, but I don't have any children. But I think one of the things is, nobody teaches you kind of how, you know, a lot of times to interact, you know, how to express your feelings.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
Like, and I think a kid, they, you kind of feel like they just are going to know those things naturally, you know, how to talk to their, I mean, I think parents probably talk about how to speak to your mother, how to speak to your father. But I think sometimes there is this missing element sometimes of like how to feel what a feeling is, you know, like parents, kids may be confused.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
They may think something's anxiety for a lot. And it's really just a feeling, you know, it's like, I think some of that, I think there's a missing piece of education there and I'm not even blaming it on parents or anything. I think it's just a part of our, maybe our culture. Um, that could be more expanded upon. And maybe even the classes in school, I know it sounds crazy. No, it doesn't.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
It sounds real. Yeah, but if somebody would have taught me in school how to recognize if one of my friends might be struggling, right? Or how to like, you know, approach an issue if there's some, you know, some type of thing goes on or if somebody's, you know, like how I'm feeling about shit, I think that could have been super helpful.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
And you have to go to lunch, dude. What kind of lunch goes with a homicide or a burning? You know, like, yeah. Oh, yeah. I'll have nuggets after a burning. Like, but then you still have to eat. Right. But it's like, yeah, you see fucking Ronnie's having, you know, eight pack of nuggets. Calm down. You fucking had four drownings this morning and you're out here just nuggeting up.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
Yeah, I can't even imagine. I would be so – it would be crazy to see a pairing menu for crimes and then different – I think if there's a couple B&Es or whatever, yeah, I'll have a fucking appetizer. You feel me? B&E, you mean breaking and entering. Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
No, well, we had a detective on one time, and we talked a lot ad nauseum about the stress that a lot of officers feel. He told this amazing story about he got called to a scene, and the mother is in the yard saying, I think my son is thinking of committing suicide. They look in the doorway. The guy takes his own life with a shotgun, shoots himself in the head. Now he has to go back.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
Now he's standing there talking to the mother when it happens. He's saying, now this happened. So he has this thing with the mother. He still has to go inside and make sure everything's okay. Like, is that exactly what happened? Who knows if somebody's still in there with a weapon? You just don't know. He can't get the door open because the body's right there.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
He finally is able to get it open, maneuver, and part of the matter from the guy's head falls down the back of his shirt.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
So now he still has to deal with the other. He has to fill out reports. It's four hours before he even gets to think about. And the whole time he has like, you know, but yeah, I just you guys are like the drain of society. You guys have to be this catch all in this. You have so many responsibilities. It's tough.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
They trick you into shooting them.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
That's a six-hour, right? I have a six-hour. Oh, yeah. I kind of prefer a Glock.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
Yeah. Oh, for sure. That's why I like living in a state where you can, where you can have a weapon too. It's nice. So in that instance, say you're, you're just, you're, you're talking to somebody, it's a hostage negotiation situation, right?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
Oh, for sure. All of us are. I don't think it doesn't sound like we're trying to like you're trying to exclude yourself. It's just like. Yeah, it's funny, you get so active and so animated, it's hard to sometimes have that control, you know? Yeah. And self-control is such a huge thing, but God, that's a powerful moment. I just wanted you to know that somebody loved this person.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
Living in Vegas still at that time.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
Yes, it was deep, man. Yeah, because otherwise, you just see this person, and a lot of times, you don't even know their story. You just pull up somebody's deceased, somebody's killed someone, somebody's tried to take their own life. Yeah. What's that moment when you're negotiating, right? And you were, so do you have a weapon on the person or you don't have a weapon on them?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
Right. You'd talk him out of unaliving himself, and then now you're like, look what I've done. Is that the thing? It's like, I kept this person alive for me?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
He was born and raised in Queens, New York, before spending 20 years on the force in Las Vegas, where he pretty much saw it all. Today's guest is LVPD's finest, Christopher Curtis.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
I'm sure. You're like, if I had my choice, if I was able to walk up on somebody in the Wild West, I would probably.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
Stockholm Syndrome. Let's bring it up. Let me read the definition of it because I always hear it and I even say it. And I thought of – originally it was people from Norway that got lost or whatever, I think. But let me think. It was a banker. Stockholm syndrome is – what did you say? It's a bank robbery thing. Oh, it's a bank robbery thing.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
Stockholm syndrome is a psychological response where a hostage or victim develops positive feelings or emotional attachment to their captor or abuser, often as a coping mechanism during prolonged captivity or abusive situations. So it's kind of like marriage or whatever, but it's like very severe. And that's just a joke. But yeah, so psychological. So that's interesting.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
Okay. Scoot up a coaster. Oh, this is a beverage coaster.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
Speaking of like that kind of thing, you hear a lot about child trafficking. You hear a lot about trafficking. That is a buzzword right now for sure. Did you see a ton of that kind of stuff or is some of that – Because I'm not saying it doesn't happen. I know that there's a lot of things like that. But is there a lot – is some of that just heightened? Because we hear about it every single day now.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
Did you see a lot of that sort of thing or what did you see? So, okay, define child from your definition of child. That's a great question. So I guess you would think of – Right. Did you see a lot of pedophilia or did you see like more like people just trafficking, like prostitution type of that being run by pimps?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
Like what did you see kind of like what kind of... Those things were separate, kind of separate, right?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
Like jugs of pee-pee, stuff like that? Like just like stuff, like food stuff sitting around?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
So that's kind of like as far as like a perverted type of thing you see. And it's kind of crazy. Like it's crazy what happens mentally to people that they... that that becomes something for them, you know, like what sickness happens inside of them, you know? And a lot of that you hear too is cyclical, I think, right?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
Yeah. Is that true? Let's look up what percentage of people that get molested end up becoming molesters. And I don't know if that's the right terminology, but you always hear that. So let me see if I can get a little bit of information with that right now. Trevin, if you have something, I just wonder if that's fact or fiction. I think it would probably be significant.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
There is widespread belief in a cycle of child sexual abuse, but little empirical evidence for this belief. The aims were to identify perpetrators of such abuse who had been victims of pedophilia and or incest in order to ascertain whether subjects who had been victims become perpetrators.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
The results among 747 males, the risk of becoming a perpetrator was positively correlated with reported sexual abuse victim experiences. The overall rate of having been a victim was 35% for perpetrators and 11% for non-perpetrators. Of the 96 females, 43% had been victims, but only one was a perpetrator.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
A high percentage of male subjects abused in childhood by a female relative became perpetrators. That's interesting. Having been a victim was a strong predictor of becoming a perpetrator, as was an index of parental loss in childhood. Wow. The data supports the notion of a victim to victim cycle in a minority of male perpetrators, but not among the female victims studied.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
That's interesting that some of them also, having become a victim of a strong index of parental loss, that sometimes you do that if you lost a parent. Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
I don't even know why that would happen. Huh? Just kind of interesting. Cause you always hear that, you know, that it happens a lot of male and then you see there, it happens a lot of males, but not as much in females. Um, what in Vegas, yeah, you run across, uh, you know, everybody's there to have the craziest time. Yes. Right. Everybody's there to have, you know, bonkers times.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
And I'm sure, and there's tons of like prostitution, sex work, girls who were just partying for money. I mean, there's everything there.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
Oh, they do? A lot of them do. What's that kind of connection? Would you see that sometimes? Like, does the pimp come and drop them off? Does the pimp put them, does he like Uber pool them or whatever? Like, how do they get the hook, the women down to the strip or whatever? Is the pimp down there? So,
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
The people who drops them off at the tracks, what kind of vehicles do pimps drive? Do they still drive these crazy, classy cars? Do they drive a van?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
A lot of the pimps, are they, what types of guys are they? Black men? Are they Asian men? Black men. It is. Black males are mostly pimps. So that's more, it's a black culture. Yes. Right. It's a black culture thing. It is. You didn't know that?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
I've seen, I've thought that because the pimps that I've met, the pimps that I've met, I've only maybe met three pimps, but two and a half of them, or one of them was mixed, but two of them were full or potentially full black.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
Oh, that's fair. Yeah. God. Yeah, and I worked in zoning for a little bit, so sorry. That should have made sense. Dude, that's awesome, man. Thank you very much. Yeah, we have a nice little collection of some neat stuff that people have given us. Good. Well, now you've got a badge. Yeah. That's very thoughtful of you. Thank you. Thank you, man. Yeah, and thank you for your service, too. Right on.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
So it's like very, it's very clear that that's a subculture of. I just didn't know if it was also Chinese or Russian type of thing, you know? Do you see a lot of that Vietnamese stuff?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
women trick do you let them do whatever they got to do out there like i mean what do you kind of you just want to make sure they're safe at a certain point if you know the crime is going to go on right if it's a kind of a fluid crime that happens regularly is there more of a idea like okay we just want this to happen safely or is it more of an idea of like we want to stop this so it's a very good question so there's only so much you could do right so the primary primary um
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
Do officers respond to in-casino activities or do in-casino security respond to those so that it's not a public thing?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
Really? And is it a lot of times just people doing cocaine by themselves? Is it, what is it you think? Uh,
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
Dude, I'll tell you a story. So one time I'm at the University of Tennessee football game. And some guy, and he was like a drunk guy, and he was like, you know, and he just kept making sounds like that and just like... He could breathe, but he wasn't great at it, you know? He put on some weight or whatever. And he was a sheriff or something, you know?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
Oh, that's true. It's just like people that lobby and people that work in Congress, you're only so far from the other side. It's like once you know so much about being an officer, at a certain point, the criminals might hire you because you know so much about being an officer. It's like so many things are kind of simpatico like that. What about, did prostitutes offer cop stuff a lot?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
Oh, yeah. A lot of the chicks over by, we had a footlocker boss. A lot of chicks over there was always trying to slurp on the cops or whatever.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
And with a lot of officers still like, whatever, this is part of my.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
And I was like, I need to get downstairs and use the restroom. He's like, oh, well, if anybody gives you any problems, just show them this. He gave me his sheriff's badge, right? In a little fan foot. It comes in like a little wallet. So I'm downstairs, dude, right? Things start kind of like people start getting weird down there. Like there's some stuff kind of popping off in a tunnel.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
Is it hard to say no to that type of thing now at some point?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
Oh, so you could still do it off duty.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
Um, what are some of the, are you talking about suicide earlier with the guy or maybe it was drug use where it was Valentine's day? Is that a scary time? Like what's like one of the most dangerous holidays?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
A lot of it's Mexican people. I think.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
And so I pull this thing out, dude, and I show it up in the air, right? And now there's other police officers come up. And they're looking at each other and they're looking at me. Right. And how old were you? Oh, this is probably eight months ago. And then. Yeah. And then the lady pushed me up against the wall for having a fake identification, being a fake police officer.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
Yeah. Well, you're out there though, in moments like, yes, you do. It's really, it's interesting. Cause I feel like we're at this juxtaposition sometimes in society where it's like, you know, yes, you want to treat people with respect. Yes. You want, um, people to, you know, you want to believe that all people are good, but then it also, you, it starts to be like,
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
it feels like the bad stuff is winning sometimes.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
There's that famous case where someone was giving someone an order, like through a wall or something?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
Yeah, the Milgram experience. In 1961, a series of social psychology experiments were conducted by Yale University psychologist Stanley Milgram, who intended to measure the willingness of study participants to obey an authority figure, who instructed them to perform acts conflicting with their personal conscience.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
Participants were led to believe that they were assisting a fictitious experiment in which they had to administer electric shocks to a learner, which was another person. These fake electric shocks gradually increased to levels that would have been fatal had they been real.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
And just because he thought it was a cop, they were willing to go to that degree. This is the craziest thing that ever happened. The strip search phone call scam was a series of incidents mostly occurring in rural areas of the U.S. that extended over a period of at least 10 years, starting in 1994. The incidents involved a man calling a restaurant or grocery store.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
And oftentimes it was a McDonald's claiming to be a police officer and then convincing managers to conduct strip searches of employees and to perform other bizarre and humiliating acts on behalf of. The police. I'm sorry to laugh, but the shit is unreal. Yes.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
With every hoax, a male caller who identified himself as a police officer would contact a manager or supervisor and would solicit their help in detaining an employee or customer who was suspected of a crime such as a theft or drug possession. He would then provide a generic description of the suspect. Like, oh, it's a female employee, et cetera, which the manager would recognize.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
And then he would ask the manager to search the suspected person. So basically, he's had a guy calling up McDonald's. Eventually, the caller would have groomed the manager to the point where they would do almost anything asked by the caller. Yes. Such as spanking, kissing, inappropriate touching, oral sex, and even sexual assault and rape. Many of the incidents would last hours. I'm sorry, man.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
This is not funny. I don't know what, I think there's something about it that many of, this is fucking crazy. It's psycho. It's crazy. Okay, good. Many of the incidents would last hours before either of the participants of the strip search realized the call is a hoax or by the intervention of a bystander.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
But they didn't know they recognize you. She did. She didn't want any bullshit. I guess she recognized I was not. not an officiant of the law.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
Yeah, I did a deep dive on this whole thing. Yeah, this thing is fascinating. Yeah, basically they would call. They would get the manager on the phone, and they'd be like, yeah, I'm calling with the police. We have security camera footage that one of your employees has been stealing. They would give a description of the employee.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
Then the manager would bring the employee into the back room with the alleged police officer still on the phone and be like, okay, yeah, I need you to have the employee take off their shirt, right? Yes. And a lot of times the person might have access to the cameras in the McDonald's or in the restaurant so they can actually watch this somewhere afar, right?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
But anyway, they'd be like, yeah, now have the person lift up their arms, have them take off their bra or their pants or whatever, spread their leg. And you have this – this is fucking crazy. You have a manager at McDonald's and an employee at McDonald's. Now they're both looking at each other's private parts for something. They didn't even say what they stole a lot of times.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
What are they going to, like, you know.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
That's the best. Yeah. The, the, the, the lady was like, oh my God. Cause she was a manager. She's like, it's busy today. I have to get back to work. She's like, let me call my husband. Yes. Who I trust.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
Yeah. And she's like, this kind of shit is too much. So anyway, just be careful where you use, um, where you use, uh, badgery, you know? Um, so, so what did you do for Tony? Uh,
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
And let them do it. To come down here and finish this examination of this female employee. So now you have the husband of the McDonald's manager sitting there strip searching a female employee who's done nothing. The whole time there's a cop on the phone. It's been a couple hours now. And at one point they told the woman, I believe, to blowjob the man.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
So now you have somebody who allegedly stole from McDonald's. blowing the boyfriend of a man. I just, sorry, this is crazy. I don't understand how they could go that far. And then at a certain point, the janitor literally gets on the phone. Yeah, this is a part right here. On February 2003, a phone call was made to a McDonald's and hi. I'm sorry, man.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
This shit in Hinesville, Georgia, the female manager who believes she was speaking to a police officer who was with the director of operations for the restaurant's upper management that she believes she was speaking to took a female employee into the women's bathroom and strip searcher.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
She also brought in a 55 year old male janitor who conducted a body cavity search of the woman to uncover hidden drugs. Yeah. It's just crazy. And then the J and I think it was a different instance, but the janitor got on the phone one time. It was like, Oh, this guy's just screwing around. Yeah. Yeah. So then people are just standing there naked and like, what the fuck just happened?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
God, this is crazy that this was such a huge thing that happened.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
Is pornography causing a problem in your life? Do you find yourself watching porno for longer periods of time and having trouble stopping? Is porn affecting your relationship or dating life? Well, you're certainly not alone. Watching pornography has become so commonplace today, and oftentimes men use porn to numb the pain of loneliness, boredom, anxiety, and depression.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
Shame and stigma prevent men from talking about these issues and getting help for them. I want to introduce you to my friend Steve. Steve is the founder of Valor Recovery, a program to help men overcome porn abuse and sexual compulsivity.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
Steve is a long-term sexual recovery member and has personally overcame the emotional and spiritual despair of abusing pornography and has dedicated his life to empowering men to do the same. Steve is an amazing person and he is a close friend of mine. I mean that. Valor Recovery helps men to develop the tools necessary to have a healthier sex life.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
Their coaches are in long-term recovery and will be your partner, mentor, and spiritual guide to transcend these problematic behaviors. To learn more about Valor Recovery, please visit them at www.valorrecoverycoaching.com or email them at admin at valorrecovery. recoverycoaching.com. Thank you. Yeah. Can you take me on a call that kind of baffled you or still sticks with you?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
Right, but the biggest crime is that he has to almost deal with this burden.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
It's ridiculous, dude. I would not... Yeah, we had a kid in high school, and there was, I guess, kids playing poker together, and he was messing with a gun and shot himself. There were two brothers in our town, and one of them, they were playing Russian roulette together, and they were idiots. I'll be honest. They were dumb, not smart guys, and one of them shot himself.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
I mean, what a weird moment. Then you're sitting, you're the brother. You're like, what even... We could have played hoops or something. You know, just like, it's heartbreaking, man.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
So I've intimately... And a shooting means somebody shot somebody or it means somebody shot an officer or it means an officer shot someone?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
So the guy up front can feel comfortable knowing that the guy behind him, his soul, his soul purpose is just to see if this dude tries to make a single move.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
That is even dumber than anything.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
Was it a black perpetrator? Yes. Okay.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
He was, he is, he's still alive. Um, Wow. And do you choose at that point? Are you trying to maim someone? Are you trying to just slow them down?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
Yeah, that's got to be kind of fascinating with a lot of race. Yeah, there's so much racial stuff surrounding police and policing. Yeah. What does that look like from the inside? What's that? Because if it was a black group and you got accused and you're Dominican? No, I'm half black, half white. Oh, you are? Okay.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
And probably help you so much in your service and your, you know, because immediately you can relate with somebody else.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
On a level that a lot of people wouldn't be able to. Yeah. What is rave? What is that profile? What is that like? There's so much racial stuff that revolves around the police all the time. Does that get uncomfortable out there in the streets? What is it like?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
Yeah. I guess it's like a business person and a connector like him. You think of those types of things and you start to see the value in them. How did Tony Hsieh die? Uh,
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
But right. Was race involved or was just a guy maybe who didn't use the best tactics in the moment who was probably also scared? Who knows what was going on? I don't know exactly what he testified. I studied that case. You did? I did.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
I've seen that. But you're a police officer.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
We're the professionals. At what point does the governor inside of you not activate or trigger that it's like, okay, I have to go here from policing to being human?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
Yeah. Do you feel different? I'm on a date now. Yeah. But it changes the whole, it changes the energy.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
Yeah, it's interesting. And then you're like thinking of what all is going around the environment at that moment. If people are, do you get caught in a, almost in, because you're a human, you're still a human, right? And if you, do you get caught in some weird flight or freeze thing?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
You're not helping the situation. That ruins a lot of things. I think it does. But then also it's like, you wouldn't have, you know, it's just, it's so it's fascinating. All the things that go on in that moment and how equipped are police officers, um, how equipped are human beings to deal with all of that at once. So now you're being recorded. You're in control.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
Got it. So we see how you finished the force. How did it start? How did it first start that you decided to join the force in Las Vegas?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
You're scared for your, your own safety. You're should be scared for the safety of your perpetrator or the person that you're putting under arrest. You know, it just, it's, I don't know how a human system even figures all that out.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
sir robert peel back in the 1800s he created the first modern policing in england so robert peel known as the father of modern policing for establishing the first modern police force in london that's why they call police bobbies because of after him oh robert yeah bobby peel um known as bobbies or peelers how did peel perform policing go ahead
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
Yeah, I'm sure. What did he say? What was his testimony? What were the key points from his testimony from Derek Chauvin's? Did he take the stand? He decided not to testify in his own defense, exercising his Fifth Amendment right.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
I wonder why they made that choice. Because you would think...
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
No, I think you're just looking at what happened. But it is fascinating how that turned into a racial thing as well. And I say that all the time.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
And just because if you call, well, what percentage of officers? I thought this. I thought that, well, each police department should have five different races at it. And you call and then that you get that race to come. Right. Then that way nobody could ever say that again. I mean, that would be absolutely ridiculous, but it's like, is that what we should, is that, you know?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
I don't know. At first when you said pants sagging, I did. There you go. But then when you said matching with the – and black people like to match, so I thought that as well. Floral print, then I started to think maybe it was like a white guy from maybe Milwaukee or something or Toledo or something trying to celebrate.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
Oh, I don't think it'll work. I'm just trying to think, how do you get the racial issues out of it? Because yeah, at a certain point you do get to like, I don't know. I don't see as much racism. Like I grew up in the South, you know, when you'd hear some people's dad, they were just sit there and just say the N word or, uh, and call people or whatever.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
And just like, um, they would say a lot of racist jokes. That was it. You know, that was a lot of what you'd hear, but I don't even hear that shit anymore, dude. Like I'm not saying it doesn't exist.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
But I think people, I think more people now, um, I don't think that there's more racism than there used to be. I think sometimes there is a fear of some black cultures and areas because I think people probably want to be safe. And they fear that some of those areas don't have a lot of safety. But I don't know that that's true. And I also don't know –
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
That kind of bums me out sometimes because it's like, well, I would like to go support probably more black-owned businesses and see them in certain areas probably, but I think there's some times where... I'm just probably afraid. It's like, I don't want to risk my safety today to do that. In a predominantly black neighborhood.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
Okay, sitting here today, retired police officer. Sergeant. Sorry.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
Yes. And that may sound racist saying that. That doesn't sound right. Well, I don't know. Why would that sound racist?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
Oh, yeah. Memphis. Okay. New Orleans, probably.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
I think maybe in some areas. So you probably do because you hear a lot about Chicago black crime. You hear that term a lot.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
All right, take a look. This is cool. Oh, total shot, 87. So for year total, look at year total.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
75% black, 18.8% Hispanic, 6.4% white or other. So there's more shooting between with blacks and Hispanics. than whites, or of the three, black leads, 75%. And this is only Chicago. So why do you think this is, right? Because you've seen, you've been on the streets. I mean, this was Las Vegas, which probably has more of a Latino population as well, huh? It does. Why do you think this is?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
Is it just a financial thing? Is it a culture thing? Is it... Because you start to think that so, like... The weird thing about crime is it starts to become part of a culture.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
Yeah, I mean I think about it. Is that the question? It's like, yeah. Well, it starts to seem like, well, that's become part of the culture. And so it's just too risky. It's like I want to – OK. I think it's part of the subculture. Oh, that's a better term. I think it's part of the subculture. Yeah, yeah. That's what I mean. That's a better term. Yeah. Sometimes I don't know all the words.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
Yeah. The media, I mean, you couldn't say that there's a black crime. You know, it's like the media is very. There is a black crime crop. crime problem. There is. But you can't... Yeah, the media seems like they never would say that, you know? And the media is kind of what people absorb, you know?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
But I think now you're able to have people who have come out of black culture and are... I think there's... I think there are good leaders out there who are saying it, you know? I think that... Hopefully it's going to change too, you know, because the shitty part is it's like, yeah, I had a friend and, uh, she had the, she had like a hat store and she wanted me to come by.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
And I was like, I, it's just, that's too, I don't want to be in that area. I don't want to be in there. Don't blame you. But to be like, I don't want to shot, you know, it just kind of sucks, you know, like shit like that kind of sucks.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
That's the first thing. And it's the best thing. It's like, I'm not going to fucking risk my life to get a fucking fitted, you know? Yeah. At the same time, it would be nice to, you know, it's like, And that's not everywhere, but it's like, yeah, that kind of shit sucks, dude. You wish that shit would go away because it fucking sucks. And it makes cities bad, man.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
Like, New Orleans has a lot of that murder over there, a lot of black-on-black murder, and it makes you not want to be around certain people. Like, it makes you just not be able to relax and enjoy yourself. We're at 300 and some people have been shot, and there's a mayor who still has a job. So being an officer and being a sergeant, what effect can the mayor really have on the crime in an area?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
And thanks for sharing, dude. I know that, you know, I appreciate you sharing. Forgive me for preaching. No, I don't know if we sound preachy. You know, I think it's okay. You know, like, like two of my black friends got killed in drive-by shootings in New Orleans, like in the past eight years. Um, and they didn't catch the guys that did it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
Um, actually one of the guys that did one of them, they did catch the guy that did it. Um, but just like, it was like, uh, just bullshit in the city, just fucking shooting, you know? And it starts to get sad. It starts to get, like, I don't know. Like, people ask me now, what should I do when I'm in New Orleans? And, you know, I say, you know, these are places to go, but don't go in these areas.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
You know, it kind of fucking sucks. It's like... But what I was thinking was, um, we had a guy named Richard Reeves on and he said, well, one of the problems these days is there's not a lot of young male, uh, role models. There's not a lot of young male role models. And he said, a lot of men used to be teachers and have a lot of male teachers anymore.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
He said there were a lot of men, um, were boy scouting, cub scout leaders, troop leaders. Um, And there was more, I guess, more young men used to be involved in the church, right? So you had, and obviously some of this shit got haywire and some of those people got molested or whatever. But outside of that, there's just not a lot of male role models.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
And so it's like, how do we start to become male role models in our community, right?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
I just meant male, I think male role models. His work is just looking at, it's the... uh, the founding president of the American Institute for boys and men. Uh, he's the author of several books, including a boys and men, why the modern male is struggling, why it matters and what to do about it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
His was just saying that, yeah, it used to be like, so to become, if you have spare time to become a baseball coach, to do the big brother program, if you can commit the time to it, like, cause it takes like a lot of real time to do those things. Um, and it really kind of just put me on notice. Like, yeah, how do I, uh,
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
create something that's or just give back to like you know since i don't have any children yet how do you be a part of that you know because i think some of our men too this is something that i believe is happening is our men are still being really young it's like we don't have to grow up it's true it's very true and i look i'm i'm still trying to not be grown up but i gotta grow up dude because of
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
they're coming after me or whatever, you know, nobody is, but my mom's like, what are we doing? You know, like, are we getting, are you going to get a family or what's going to go on?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
I think so, dude, because I think I would miss out on it. You know, I'd like to have a son, be a good dad, make my wife happy or whatever until she gets fucking all pissed off.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
Dude, I haven't even met my wife yet, first of all. And I'm going to be fucking, I got some shit to tell her when I do meet her. I'll tell you that.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
Huh? Yeah, I do pray about it. Do you pray for her specifically? No, I haven't prayed for her specifically, but I do pray. It's a good point.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
Wow. Yeah, it's like creating when you get to make your own person on NBA 2K or whatever. You know what I'm talking about? The spiritual side, though. Yeah, totally. Yeah, yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
And it teaches you a lot about people. Is it, is that a more fun place to be in law enforcement? Do you feel like, like, I know that's a strange word probably to use with policing, but is that a more entertaining place? It is. Um,
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
Yeah, I got you. But, yeah, I made a list of, like, you know, things I would like. But then it's like I don't want to get too locked in. But that's a good call, man. Yeah. And just pray that God, you know, I have been praying that God gives me the – just the ability to lean more into becoming who I need to be to be in that situation, you know?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
Well, I think, you know, I've thought about that. I'd like, I don't know. It's been hard with work. It's like work is my biggest relationship. I mean, when I have a free moment, I'm working. I just, I like it, you know, where I'm planning or I'm thinking, what could I do? And not even just work, but like, how could I start to do like work that is more, um, given back to the community?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
Like, you know, but you start to think of like, okay, well, what, like, what can I create now that could really be part of something cool or help people? Um, and I think we all think like that, but, uh, But yeah, so just any facet of like, what can I create while I'm still have some creativity in me, you know?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
And then as far as dating, like I try to put myself out there, you know, I'm not on the apps, but I'll meet girls, go on dates. You know, I'm pretty brave to be like, oh, let's meet up for a coffee or let's grab a dinner or something like that. I feel like I'm kind of tired of running around, to be honest. I think it kind of leaves out of your system a little bit. It does. Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
So that's kind of where I feel like I'm at. Cool. And then it's like you get into an age range where you're like, okay, well, you know. It's kind of tough. Sometimes some people have children. But once you realize that, you're like, okay, well, I never thought about it if I would date somebody with children. So then you start to think about that and learn different little things and stuff.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
That's a faux pas. A little bit, yeah. First, yes, sir. Sir, yes, sir. Retired police sergeant from the Las Vegas. Metropolitan Police Department. Las Vegas Metropolitan Police Department.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
Yeah, that bothers me. A lot of times I don't like it that much.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
No, but I would love if my wife had her own room.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
No, I think it's neat. I think there's stuff like that. Relationships are kind of evolving and stuff too, I think. People are figuring out kind of what works for them. I think sometimes I've been afraid to maybe even say what I feel like. Yeah, if I would be like, hey, I'd love it if I could have a separate bedroom than my wife, you know.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
And if we wanted, you know, like then we could have our own rooms. I think that that's the most awesome thing possible. And that would be fine. Yeah. So but I think for years you get caught in this idea like, oh, that's going to be crazy to say to somebody, you know. But then I think as time goes on, you're like, oh, nothing's really that crazy.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
You just have to say it and see if somebody else is OK with it. You know, you've talked a lot about like policing and like. how to police, that seems like to be something that you care about. Has policing changed a lot over the years, do you feel like?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
Well, I think, but now in some instances, things are manic and the situation has escalated already, right? Like sometimes it's already, things are insane. Like if a guy's shooting or something. Sure.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
But you're saying just walking up person to person. What is the daily interaction like?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
Oh, look, I love that idea. I love the idea that that's – what keeps it – what keeps that from happening then? Because then you would almost want to be able to check each day, okay, how is this officer doing today? Are they going to be able to manage to be out there in this field? Are they getting paid enough to be able to take care of themselves to get –
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
massages or ice packs, things that people need though, that to de-stress them, dude, I go get a massage. It'll change the way I talk to my mother on the phone. It's like, I love that concept, you know, but it's like, well, yeah, it seems like we would be able to take care of these people more who are the, really the sieves of our society that are like drain, you know, They're the capture.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
They're the catch of the drain, you know.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
Yeah, I mean, I've learned that in my own life, man. I've really showed up with a hammer a lot of times. I'm trying to have less of it. And it's been getting better, oddly. I just find little moments where I'm like, I've tried that so many times. Waiting for somebody to act a certain way towards me instead of just acting that way. Yes. Fuck, that's a fucking... I've spent a lot of my life waiting.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
Oh, I'm... I'm just going to wait for you to act this way towards me because I deserve that if that's the way it's supposed to be or something. And not in like a way of like praise or anything like that, but just even something simple like a relationship, work relationship or even with family. I'm going to wait.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
You know, instead of like, I'm going to wait for you to hold my hand instead of me just holding your hand type shit, you know?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
Oh yeah. I bet you are. I mean, cause you're firsthand right in front of those people all the time.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
I mean, I don't know what it's like. I don't know what it's like. How do you make sure that an officer, when they leave out for the day each day, is in the best state that they can be in to be these liaisons between – Right and wrong in the world, you know, and that's what it's like. How best can we take care of these people?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
These, you know, I feel like if we can afford to give money to other places, we should give it poured into these people. It should be expensive. It should be a well-paid job. And I'm not saying that it isn't. But it should be, you know, I feel like these are the fucking, a lot of other shit's easy, dude.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
Oh, yeah. Oh, God. Yeah, dude. So how do you get it to become a hostage negotiator? Because that's what you became.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
Who's considered an unalive in themselves.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
Talk to the person that's in crisis. That's in crisis.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
It would kind of suck though. If that you're considering unaliving yourself, you get on with the negotiator and he's just horrible at it. You're like, Oh God, like, Yeah. Dude, that's crazy. That's a mic drop, bro.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
Were they really good at it, though, and the person just didn't know it? Because anybody could say that. That could be an asshole move.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
Oh, fair, fair. Okay. Damn, that's one of my questions. Let me think.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
Hey, Mike. Yeah, who's this? This is Theo, actually. I'm the... I'm working... I'm here today, man. Just... I really screwed up, didn't I, man? I think it seems like you've had a tough day.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
I think everything's going to be okay, man.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
Well, I think you're going to have to, her dad's going to be pissed. Yeah. I mean, yeah. People are going to be upset. I'm not thinking about her dad. I'm thinking about my family. Okay. People are going to, yeah, it's going to be, yeah, man, it sucks. Okay. It sucks. But here we are. Yeah. I mean, how am I going to face my son? Your son's pretty upset right now.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
Because your son's life is still around, and that's not what he needs right now. You're probably right about that.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
What would you say in that situation? I don't know. I don't know. I would say, I would tell him the truth. I would say I messed up. And you think that's the answer? Tell him I messed up? I know I messed up. I think it's part of it. I know you know you did, but he probably doesn't know what's going on. He doesn't. Is he out there right now? Yeah. You want me to put him on?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
It is intense. It is intense. Fuck, it's intense. Because you're like, even if you get to that part, is he just going to tell the son goodbye?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
No, well, the fascinating thing to me is, yeah, when you realize the gravitas of this, like you think it's easy. And then even this is a placebo, even in that you're like, I don't have the answer right now. And if I don't get this right, what happens? And then I'm starting to learn as I think about it too. I'm like, well, it's not about you anymore. It's about your son.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
And then that kind of makes me sad. And then it's like, now suddenly I feel more feelings. So I'm like, well, shit, now I'm doing this really for the son. And I didn't even realize that until that moment, you know, even though like you could be trained for that, it's like until that said, and it's a real moment and you can picture the son and you, God, dude, it's like, it's just scary.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
And then at some point, you might agree that the guy, it might be best if he lets God just, I don't know. Is that crazy to say that? I don't know.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
Oh, yeah. Hell yeah. Jesus. Most of this podcast is like that. Yeah. Yeah. It's funny. The little things that will trigger things that you didn't have or things you admire so much or even a word sometimes that a phrase somebody will use and it'll just like well you up with emotion.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
Could she lose her life? Yeah, you have to make choices.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
It does seem fun. Cause then it kind of adds a little bit of a challenge to your own, how you're communicating.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
Is it helpful? Yeah. How would a hostage negotiator, what are you telling if I'm talking to a lady?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
Well, I do think it's interesting for for people in police, fire departments, those types of jobs where, yes, I'm sure you develop a lot of empathy, but then also you are put under pressure. an unrealistic amount of stress.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
Yesterday I went to, um, yeah, I went to watch some music and, uh, I was pretty tired, probably stayed up a little later than I should have, but I had a pretty good time, you know?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
Oh, I see what you're doing. So you're saying the same thing?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
Right, because then I feel a little bit more, okay, this is nice. This is fun. This is worth our time.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
A lot of officers are, I would assume it seems like to me from the discussions I've had that a lot of people get put under stress that they're not really even as a human equipped to deal with. So then at that point, it's probably tough for you to engage your best feelings and your best empathy at moments when you're under stress. And then you also have to look out for your own survival.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
Do they have – that almost sounds like a movie that I bet somebody would – not exactly, but I bet – Yeah, a negotiator, and they're really channeling things that are going on in their own lives.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
Thanks, man. That's some nice thoughts. And just, so, so, so that's a nice thing you can do. If you're talking with a woman, pay attention and share stuff that they said back to them to create comfortability.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
No, in the beginning, especially you're just doing your best. It's like you're trying to survive. It's almost like you're treading water. It's like, I know I'm swimming, but I'm really just, you know, trying to stay alive at this moment.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
Yeah. How do you feel about it? Like, I'm okay with it actually. Just kind of a tactic. Because sometimes you need somebody to put you, you get all soiled. You need somebody to put you back in the pot, you know? Yeah. Like sometimes I'll be frantic, but everything's fine. You're like, yeah, everything's fine.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
It's like fucking, you know, I'll get caught down to, you know, I'll get caught going upstream when I really don't need to, you know? What else was I thinking about? Oh, there's that famous case in Las Vegas of the shooter, right? Yeah. Yeah. You know, there's a lot of conspiracy theories about that.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
I'm not debating you with it. I'm just saying, I'm sure it's quite a juxtaposition, you know, when you first start out in Vegas, what are some things that you saw?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
Yeah. We're not with our back to the door, facing the door. So, but yeah, because I guess you develop, it's not really a paranoia as much as it is a... Preservation, really.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
Does doing police work, sergeant work, negotiation work, does it wear down your compassion or does it build it over time, do you think?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
Las Vegas cop shot wife and five-year-old son before taking his own, before unaliving himself.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
So you can... So if you're a police officer and you still have so many years left on your...
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
Because he'd done some things that were bad that God wouldn't forgive him for.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
What'd you think he was? Blackburn? Yeah. Probably white or black.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
I mean, it's crazy to think of all the little pieces of all the little avenues of. things you would never think need to be information or that you would glean from an officer, a sergeant, a detective, a hostage negotiator.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
But the simple fact that you're saying based on my information, if you are unaliving yourself, you shouldn't unalive other people with you because it's not, that's not the way to go. I don't even know who else even – yeah, I mean, that's an easy thing just to say, but you're saying it based on information that you've seen, you know? Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
Yeah, I think we talked – man, thank you so much today, Chris, for joining me, man. I think a lot – it's like – it's just interesting you start to get even more of a scope of like – just what fills up the minds and the histories and the timelines of, of officers, of people that are there to serve, you know, people that are there to protect and how do they manage all that?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
Yeah, because once somebody goes over the edge, they're over the edge.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
At that point, you know, the original plateau doesn't matter to them anymore. You know, the original gradient of things doesn't matter.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
Oh, it's already going to be super safe. Yes. Man, Christopher Curtis, thanks so much for hanging out, dude. I got to take my mom to eat or I would chat a little more.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
Oh, thank you, dude. Yeah, I feel really lucky, you know. I think we did a good job today of like kind of learning about some stuff. And also some of it is just like getting into the psyche of seeing what it's like to go through the minds of someone who's gone through your life. And then, yeah, how do you best try to manage it?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
And then what can we even expect out of people who aren't able to manage their emotions and mental fatigue? And they're not able to manage it, but they're still required to be at work. It's a huge asking. It's a huge fucking undertaking.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
Yeah. Well, it's just great to have this conversation, man. And we learn more as we go. Um, Christopher Curtis, thank you so much, dude. And, uh, yeah, I appreciate it. I love that hat, dude. Mi cerote. Mi gente, papa.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
The act of a person commercially exchanging sex, robbing, or stealing from their sex-buying client known as a trick. Got it. I got it. Okay. Yeah, I thought it was something at a sushi joint, too. I'm like, damn. I don't know.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
#584 - Retired Las Vegas Police Sgt.
Like, would you bust into some, like, wild parties? Like, would you bust in and people have been up for days? Would you bust in and people were so bummed that you were ruining the party?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
Today's guest is a writer and a social scientist. He's also a dual citizen. He's the president of the American Institute for Boys and Men. I'm grateful that he's here today. Today's guest is Richard Rees. Richard Reeves, thanks for joining us today, brother.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
And then my parents got divorced. And so then at that point, yeah, you kind of start to, and then my dad didn't live with us. And so my mom didn't want him to live with us. And so, you know,
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
you know, then you're kind of like in this, you don't even realize it as a kid, you're just a kid, but you're in this starvation space for where do you get, um, probably role models and where do you, who do you look to, you know? Um, and I had my brother around for a couple of years and then I was like a huge wrestling fan. Like I really idolized a lot of those guys. Um, did you do it?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
No, I got into steroids, but I never did the wrestling part. You did the steroid bit. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So I did. Yes, I guess. You know, but yeah, I mean, I remember collecting all the figurines and we would watch it. I had a neighbor and his dad was, his dad was like kind of dialed in. And so that was helpful.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
dad to you as well like because you can share it around i think that's part of it oh for sure i think you can get your father you can get your father little pieces from different men right you can i believe that like um you had a basketball coach that you know showed me like care and affection and um included me in things that his family was doing and then i ended up moving out and living with a different family when i was like 14 and that family had a stable father in the home and so that uh that helped a lot but yeah not trying to like make it about me i'm just trying to like um
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
put both of our stories out there. Yeah. And I think it's important.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
Okay, here we go. It says, oh, we have fewer boys are playing In 2013, half of boys aged 6 to 17 participated regularly in sports. According to SFIA data, only 41% of boys did in 2023. Girls aged 6 to 12 had 34% and 13 to 17 age girls were 38% played at higher levels in 2023. than in any recent years. So girls is going up, like you said, boys is going down.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
Some of that could be attributed to also a lot more boys are like, they choose to become gamers and that sort of thing, but more sedentary things.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
But it seems like this one is important. That's one of the reasons, yeah, that I wanted to get to talk to you today because, you know, a lot of our listeners are men and boys. I know Scott Galloway was on and he had mentioned that you were kind of his godfather of information or somebody that he really looked up to, you know. And I did also see you were born on the 4th of July. Is that right?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
Oh, that's interesting. Yeah, because guys don't usually look at each other when they're sharing information that much.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
Yeah, when you talk to someone, you rarely stand and look directly. There's always a little bit of an act.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
Do you play golf? Okay, good. I'd be willing to play it, but I just, I can't even calm down right now.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
That's the thing to do. Walk and talk. That's the best.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
Yeah. Mike's girlfriend's a therapist now, and she and I, whenever we really needed to discuss stuff, we'd go on a walk. Because you're in motion already, there's a part of you that feels like it's moving forward, even if you're sharing something that's troubling. Because sometimes you're sitting in a sedentary – you're just sitting there in a room somewhere. It's like, oh, well, you leave.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
Correct. Do they kick you out of Britain if you're on the- That would be great.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
You haven't really gone anywhere. Nothing's happened, you know. But on a walk, you're making progress no matter what, even by just like staying in motion.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
It's like, yeah, maybe it's easier if I'm just able to share and have somebody there, right? I remember one time I was talking to my brother, and I didn't know that this had been important in my life, but… He said, hey, man, I can just – I was having a tough day, man. I pulled over. I was like just – I was kind of like falling apart a little bit.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
And he's like, hey, man, I can just sit here on the phone with you. We don't have to say anything, right?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
And I'd never – he's like, I have some time, right? I have an extra 10 minutes. I can just sit here with you. We don't have to say anything. And I can just be here with you. And, man, I just – I mean it was like a dam inside of me broke. It was like literally there was tears coming out of my toenails. It was just like – You didn't realize all the time you needed someone just to be there.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
I didn't need to hear them say anything. I didn't need to hear how they thought I felt. I didn't need to hear a response to anything, no judgment, nothing. I just needed somebody there, you know? And it was like... I remember my hands vibrating. It shook me so much. You're very lucky.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
Is pornography causing a problem in your life? Do you find yourself watching porno for longer periods of time and having trouble stopping? Is porn affecting your relationship or dating life? Well, you're certainly not alone. Watching pornography has become so commonplace today and oftentimes men use porn to numb the pain of loneliness, boredom, anxiety, and depression.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
Shame and stigma prevent men from talking about these issues and getting help for them. I want to introduce you to my friend Steve. Steve is the founder of Valor Recovery, a program to help men overcome porn abuse and sexual compulsivity.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
Steve is a long-term sexual recovery member and has personally overcame the emotional and spiritual despair of abusing pornography and has dedicated his life to empowering men to do the same. Steve is an amazing person and he is a close friend of mine. I mean that. Valor Recovery helps men to develop the tools necessary to have a healthier sex life.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
Their coaches are in long-term recovery and will be your partner, mentor, and spiritual guide to transcend these problematic behaviors. To learn more about Valor Recovery, please visit them at www.valorrecoverycoaching.com or email them at admin at valorrecovery. recoverycoaching.com. Thank you.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
Do you think it was because of your birthday at all or no? You know... Because it's just interesting.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
You all know I like to keep things cool, even in the winter, and nothing is cooler than a blue cube cold plunge. I'm fortunate enough to have one at home, and let me tell you, it's like baptizing your soul, baby. Get in that little crispy bucket, baby. It gets rid of them demons we all have and makes you feel great for seven or eight hours afterwards. It's good.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
My buddy Thomas Schiffer, the genius behind Blue Cube, and I go way back, and he just launched a presale for their new stand-up cold plunges. Wow. These things are the Cadillacs of cold plunge therapy. American-made, full immersion, weatherproof frames, and built like a Sherman tank. I'll say this. They are built well.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
And because you're listening to me, you can get a sweet discount when you mention my name. That's right. Just tell them Theo sent you and they'll knock a good bit off the price. So if you're ready to boost your metabolism, eliminate inflation and blast away your anxiety, give them a call. Head over to their website, bluecubebaths.com, and dive into the details.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
Opt in on their website or give them a call. I am grateful for the one that I have, and I feel honestly thankful to be able to have one. I know they're not in everybody's price range, and that's understandable. But at the same time, I want to support my friend and his amazing company.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
Let me see, if male suicide rates had been the same as women's from 1999 to 2023, we would have lost 546,000 fewer men. So men are... Since 2010, suicide rates have risen by 30%.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
Yeah, because you have to have purpose, right? And I think you have to have purpose. We've talked a lot about that on this podcast. I learned a lot about it. But yeah, we have to have something to feel a part of. Man, I remember there was a guy I went skydiving with and he'd listen to this podcast when it first started out and-
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
we, he and I kind of connected and, um, and we connected on like, kind of like some emotional levels talking about life and stuff. And then there were a couple of times he'd messaged me. I didn't get back to him over like, uh, it was like six months or something. I mean, life, you know, life. Yeah. And then he took his own life.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
Not that I had, you know, nothing I probably could have done, but just like, man, it's just like,
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
Yeah. Yeah. No, I think that's really cool information. It's good to look at. It's good to like – and it's really – it makes perfect sense, right? And it's like you want to have a reason, right? And sometimes I think women – yes, they didn't have the – access to money, and in a capitalistic society, money is power, right? But also, I think there was a missing respect there, right?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
There wasn't, I think if women had been, if it had been totally respected, the sacrifices that they made, and the just intrinsic value of who they are as mothers and as caretakers and as, um, bridges of empathy and affection.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
Um, and as homemakers, no matter where they are, whether they're in a home or whether they're in a conversation, you know, just being able to have that ability to create peace. I think if women had, if that had been more respected, then, um, maybe they never would have felt as much of a movement, uh, or as much of a desire to have so much of a movement. Because they had the power.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
The Wages for Housework campaign was a 1970s international movement that demanded governments recognize the value of unpaid domestic labor primarily performed by women. Wow. The founders were Silvia Federici, Selma James, Marielsa Diacosta, and Bridget Gaultier. Their goals were to change the dependency of domestic workers, reverse power relations, and redistribute wealth.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
Right, right. And I'm not saying that women didn't deserve to have all the jobs and whatever they wanted to do. I'm just saying if there had been a different level of respect and some, yeah, and this makes perfect sense, and some financial equality, maybe they wouldn't have wanted that. I have no idea. I'm just thinking.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
Right. Both parents are so stressed out that they can't even have a relationship anymore.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
Right. And the rules aren't super clear. You don't know who's going to be doing what. You don't know who's getting certain things done. You don't know.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
Really? Well, since the 70s. Yeah, you're saying that. Yeah, that's interesting. Right, so it's a similar idea. It's not the same.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
It's almost like men are coming to bridge the gap there of like making, because there always needs to be some, one of the parties has to be, until we can get both of the parties to be aligned, has to be the one that wants to bring it back to let's have a family and move. Because I think you have to do it. It's like, it's how we're built. Yeah, exactly.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
Oh, yeah. I would like to have some kids, man. I started this campaign. It's called 2020 Wive. That means like 2025, but it's like this is the year I get a wife. Oh, I see.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
Wow. Yeah, you don't think about the gift of your own citizenship, right? And you don't think about what others go through to get it. And that – yeah, they used to have – I know whenever I was growing up, you had the Pledge of Allegiance.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
Can you convert to Islam online or not? Bring that up. I'm not the right person to ask that. How to convert to Islam. Oh, good. And there's a 1-800 number? There is. Scroll up. Scroll down. Oh, it's an 866 number. Damn, that's great. Does that mean you have to pay for it? I'm sure they hit you with something, man. Converting to Islam is a very easy process and can be done online in privacy. Okay.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
Now, that makes it sound very suspect, the fact that it has to be done.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
Okay, twice as many ancestors. An ancestor means what?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
An ancestor means somebody that existed? So twice as many females existed as men?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
There was definitely a lot more – even though the Pledge of Allegiance was like a small thing, it's one of those traditional things that made you feel like a part of something, right? It was like a traditional practice that – that created a commonality between kids.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
Twice as many. Yes, modern humans have approximately twice as many female ancestors as male ancestors. This is due to a number of factors.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
Yeah, good. Because we're trying to do a little bit better job. That's one of my goals this year is just to have a better – because sometimes I just assume everything is true, right? And a lot of this stuff is just helpful information. But I don't understand though. Right. So how can you have twice as many females?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
But I guess it makes sense because – you know, there's mother earth, right? So obviously she's going to want more kind of babes around hanging out on her. And then you're going to have like, there's going to be, um, and females are the producers. They have like a, they have the womb and they're the makers. They're like the recipe. They're the chefs.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
So you need to like more, you know, life is about creation. So I think it makes sense that you're going to have more women around probably. Yeah. Right. Does that make any sense, you think? No. Okay. I just, I just think women are the ones who like keep things together. Sure. So I think you're going to need more of that probably to keep the world functioning.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
Why aren't we Googling this? That's a good question. Who wants a bunch of dudes loitering around anyway? Someone's going to call the police.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
There you go right there. Look at that lady right there.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
Oh, for sure. Well, she's obviously going to have a probably, like, definitely. I don't know. Maybe Mother Earth is very jealous and she doesn't want women around.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
That's what I would think, too. If she was straight. But men are just loitering around. They're jerking off in the parking lot or whatever. You don't want that. I don't think that's it. That's not what you want. You want some babes around, I think.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
We kind of thought it was lame sometimes, but sometimes you didn't, you know, like at certain points of the year, if certain things were going on in the culture, it meant more to you.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
It's like the NBA. It's like NBA players kind of thing. What do you mean? Like a lot of those guys have. Who has the most kids in the NBA? Bring that up. Wow.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
I think they're promiscuous type of, you know, so it's like Calvin Murphy, there we go, 14 children. So I'm just saying, yeah, these guys can definitely... Well, you see it on Tinder as well.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
That's what Scott Galloway was saying, that top 1% of men.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
I have 0% chance of looping things. Okay, let me try. I believe in you, so okay.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
I don't know any women that have drowned, and I know some men that have drowned. Right.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
I don't think so. It's not a Native American thing, is it?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
Well, the number of men and women who try tandem skydiving is roughly equal. The sport of skydiving is predominantly male. Professional skydivers, only about 14% of professional skydivers in the United States are women. Okay. Some reasons for the disparity, women may be more risk-averse than men, just like you're saying. Yeah, that's number one.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
And women may be perceived as less interested in taking risks.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
Right, so who cares if your nuts land out in the desert or whatever because your shoe didn't open.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
So these... These smokejumpers... Smokejumpers are highly trained firefighters who parachute from airplanes into remote areas to fight wildfires. Wow. It's almost like severe barbecue, like one of those TV shows or whatever.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
Well, also, there's no toxic femininity either, which is interesting. It's like because you got to have one and the other no matter what, I feel like. Getting your sweat on might seem like hard work, but with Symmetry Sauna, it's a work of art. Premium custom saunas for your home or business, plus a series of sleek pre-built saunas.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
I just got myself a Symmetry Sauna and I'm sweating out bad decisions. Like the time I tried to just fill my own chipped tooth in. Why sauna? Well, it relieves sore joints and muscles, improves skin, boosts heart health, and melts stress like hot butter. And I'm finally sleeping like a baby, which is rare since I'm usually up at 3 a.m. wondering if penguins have knees.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
Pro athletes, fitness buffs, big folks getting small, small folks getting big. Everybody's hot boxing. And symmetry saunas can help. Designed in the USA, made with Aspen wood from ancient Estonian forests. Ooh. Yep, fancy trees. Symmetry Sauna, the perfect balance of form and function. Learn more about how to get your own premium home sauna from Symmetry Sauna at symmetriesauna.com slash T-H-E-O.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
Just to kind of circle back to where we were, so there's a lot of men that are suffering, right? Yeah. Like that's kind of improved. There's a lot more of suicide. There's uncertainty is what it means to be a man. Masculinity, this kind of masculinity with this new femininity kind of being defined now. The new masculinity is kind of undefined. Yeah, that's a good way to put it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
Yeah. It's like, yeah. People start looking at, well, what are the words of the pledge of allegiance? It didn't matter. It was just that we got up.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
And a lot of men are looking for their place. What do you feel like is causing that these days? Because it's not women causing it. It's not this equality of women. No.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
Now, are they gone for good or they've just gone away from America, right? They've gone away from America. They've gone away from America.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
We got up and we did it together. And I don't think there's anything wrong if you live in a country and you're a member of it to pledge allegiance to that country. I feel like, um, yeah, correct. You know, like, cause otherwise then what are you? You're just, you're just a passerby. Are you like working for another country? Like what's your real modus operandi then I guess. Um,
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
just they just know that yeah i mean that was a lot of the commercials when i was a kid it was like i was born in a small town you know what i'm saying there was that commercial like somebody made something and i remember my grandfather worked at the um plant in his town and they made elevators and stuff they made parts for elevators and it was a small town but he worked there and my grandma would take him lunch over there at the weekend
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
Yeah, we appreciate it, man. You want to move that in a little bit for me, if you don't mind? Yeah, sure. And you are British.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
during lunchtime and they had a lunch whistle in town and there was just these little things, you know, and, and, and you, whenever we drove past there, you know, like grandpa works there, you know, it was like, so there was, um, it added purpose to everybody's existence.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
Blina Fistiniog is a disease as well, I think. Oh, in a few minutes, it'll be a new, uh, drug available in America.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
Sounder. Alarm. Thank you. Wow. Yeah. So it's almost like as men, we're out of the minds now. A little bit. Like, we had that... Not everybody. Some people are still in there, and that's good.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
Right. It was the only way who's going to pay for dinner. Right. And not to eat. Yeah. Not at a fancy restaurant. Right.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
I don't know. I don't know either. David Bale right there in 2066, the long single Steiner married for the first time in a Cherokee ceremony in Oklahoma.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
Her husband, entrepreneur and activist David Bale sadly died of lymphoma four years later. Wow.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
For sure. And it used to be that, yeah, almost every man was, you weren't guaranteed a wife, but everybody's going to need to pair up because the way that the script was put together, you needed each other because you needed someone to be in the home. You needed someone to be the breadwinner. The script was there. You had to partner up. So figure it out and let's move on.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
Oh, you have? Yeah. So if you had to choose, what do you do then?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
And we'll be right back. Wow. Very true. So one thing you have to start to look at is where do men start to – or where do men continue to find these building blocks, right, to create the worth inside of themselves? For me, one thing has been through other men, right? And even like you're saying, shoulder to shoulder, like things that – experiences that I've had that have been the best –
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
Like even when I used to go to Brazilian jiu-jitsu and take classes there, it was really amazing because you're in this physical space, but also there's so much mutual respect in there. It's not people trying to beat each other up. It's people trying to help each other physically learn how to take care of themselves, right? But with that, there's so much camaraderie and respect.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
and love and compassion that comes along with having great instructors. And a lot of times it's just the guy next to you who's your best instructor for the next moment.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
Recovery meetings, you know, I go to recovery meetings for intimacy and AA, and those meetings for me are really great, especially the intimacy ones like where, you know, they call it like sex and love addiction and stuff, but it's really just like intimacy disorders or connection disorders or just – it's almost just – Low self-worth, it's all of that.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
No, I don't think so. But that would be a great idea if every class had to go watch that ceremony.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
And sometimes you base it off of your relationship with women or you can look at your relationship with women to see how you're doing on your own.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
A lot of the ones I go to are just men. And it's not that I don't want women in them. It's just like, I want a space where it's just men. I can be able to share openly if I'm struggling with a certain thing or how I'm feeling or, and it just be other men, you know, it just feels. And then you're not trying to like slurp on any of the chicks that are in there either.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
That's what you're getting. And that's one of the reasons I go. I go to hear other men share. I go to share. And sometimes they'll say something and like...
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
my body will just go like that right it's like just your shoulders drop you breathe it's an exhale that i didn't even know i needed to take yeah it's an exhale that has just been running in the back of my subconscious for sometimes decades sometimes hours sometimes years minutes but it's something that i needed to hear i needed to hear everything was okay yeah and i needed to hear another man's voice say it yeah and um and it helps it helps uh it helps
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
And what is Girl Scouts? Are they just joined forces? No. Girl Scouts is still Girl Scouts. No. No. Yeah. And we can't go over there?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
It's in the nature. Yeah. Yeah. And there should be spaces where it's like, Hey, man can meet up here tonight. And they used to have more of them. There was like more American legions. There was more like VFWs, but a lot of that was military based type stuff. It was. And since we haven't had that large of a war. Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
I can't believe that it's not mandatory, like in classes or in school that you have to go see that. Maybe that's something that one of these think tanks could change, you know?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
You know, I know we have conflicts and we've had some smaller wars, but I know we have it since we haven't had such a huge conflict. There hasn't been that big band of brothers type of vibe that's that's brought men together so much.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
And then also, even if and I'll go even as far to say, if you're a white male, right, like there's there's spaces for black males, Latinos, Middle Eastern clubs, there can be all types. But if you're a white guy. You just are fucking – you're looked at as – you're pointed at a lot of times it feels like by the media as like a loser as part of the problem, as the creator of the problem.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
I don't think a lot of that energy is also good in our country when we do – we have white males in our country. And it's – you can't like – You can't make also white males feel like they don't exist, you know, because also a lot of white people didn't have a lot of like, yes, I know there's privilege. But if you grew up with nothing, you didn't fucking feel any privilege sometimes.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
In fact, being white and having nothing, I would get looked at personally as why the fuck don't you have anything? How did you fuck this up so bad? Right. You know, like you must – something really must be wrong with you if you're not – you have the right color, but your family can't even get shit together enough. Wow, what a loser.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
And I'm not speaking against any other group, but I'm just saying sometimes, you know, like – there's not a rep, there's no one, you're not allowed to speak up for your own group just because of history. And that doesn't feel super fair sometimes, you know? Does that seem crazy or not?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
Yeah, if I start starting slavery shit, yeah, gun me down. But it's like civil rights. But if I'm just playing fantasy football and trying to take care of a family, fucking let me be somebody.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
And Britain started it. Yeah, we polished it up a little. I'll agree. But other people started it too, you know? Yeah. And the first slave, I think, was who was it? Who was the first slave ever in the history of time? It was in the Bible, wasn't it? Well, there's lots of slaves in the Bible. There you go.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
You're the president for the American Institute for Men and Boys. So what is that institute?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
Oh, yeah, well, and a lot of it's to our media. Our media is usually very well-off people, and they're like, let me break out the racism drum and beat that one. And, of course, those things need to be addressed. But if that stuff becomes the only sound you hear, then you guys are going to just – then everyone is going to continue to dance the same dance. That's the point.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
And so I think that that's where we're missing some of the evolution. But I think that that's starting to change. It's why people are sick of Hollywood and everything that they've created for a while.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
Right. Well, a lot of times now the lens is the villain. That's the thing that I've started to realize. Yeah, find the villain. The lens is the villain. And we didn't realize that we were having – we were being forced to look through this lens for so long because our media has just been the same. It's been so commandeered. And so now it's becoming freer.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
And I think that that's scaring kind of like the powers that be. I think it's one of the reasons why they don't want TikTok taking over. They want to force a sale of TikTok. They're afraid that it will share truths that they can't hold anymore. Right.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
Well, it feels that sort of vibe in a way. It does. It does.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
Well, because at a certain point, you can't hide. It's like I think there has to be some bit of – enough of you will be revealed.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
It's like even sometimes I feel like if I don't fact-check certain things and I'm learning how to have certain conversations, like people will get an idea of who I am or who you are by listening to us for a certain period of time, and then they can make a fair judgment for themselves, and it doesn't even have to be – A good or bad judgment. We're not saying that either one of us is good or bad.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
We're probably saying that we're both both. We're just trying to have a conversation together. And I think as a listener, you get that. You're like, okay, I don't maybe vibe with this guy. I'm glad I got to listen to him. It gives you value for your time. Do I put my time in? I'm grateful I got to listen to that person. I agree with some of the things they say. Oh, I'd never thought about that.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
but you also get to see people as more complete. And I think it goes back to what you're saying, like that, you know, a lot of people can we're not, they, people aren't as simple. Both things can be true all the time for a lot of people. And they are.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
Usually two things are true. And I think that's what's, that's what's a lot happened with podcasts is it, it holds two, three, four, seven things true at the same time while you're having a conversation, which is very normal as opposed to get this answer, get this clip, make it short, let it, we want to get our, how we feel across. And that's what matters.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
The truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
Oh, welcome. Nice. Thank you. And you're the president for the American Institute for Boys and Men. Yep.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
Yeah. And I think then it makes it not about you. It makes it about this greater presentation of like of let's let's yeah, let's just be let's be as honest as we can.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
Obviously, he was trying to get laid, too. Undeniable.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
It is kind of interesting how you can have two people with the exact same thing. One will say that they're this side, one will say they're that side, and they cannot agree on shit. I don't understand. There's some minutiae in there that I can't even figure out. Because they'll want the exact same things. They could even write, these are the three things I want.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
And the other side will write, these are the three things I want. But if they don't each say that they're on the same side, then they will almost find a way to disagree.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
And no one even knows all of them either. And they're all so distorted anyway.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
Yeah, well, some people say also, though, that they wanted to load states up so that they could create more voters in certain states, you know?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
Really? Yeah, because they can't vote. Right, but if you legalize them, if you just bring them in, and then you find quick paths to legalization, then they would be able to vote.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
I don't know if they are, though. I think a lot of the immigrants that we're getting are also from... They were getting so many Haitians and stuff.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
I don't know. I think if I come in and somebody's feeding me the first hand that feeds me, that's probably the hand that I would think that I'm going to cater to. I don't know if that's a definite thing that they were doing. You know what I'm saying? It's hard to say if it is or isn't, but letting 21 million in.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
immigrants in you know when we had two border patrol agents on and they said it was it was a nightmare for them you know it was a nightmare for them and their families the stress that they went through um the fact that they would just have to get a an agreement from somebody that they would come and meet the agent like our a middle person they would like have like a connection piece to america um and they'd have to sign an agreement that they would come back and meet that person at a certain time or place and never show up and then there's no trail for them it was a
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
You mean the actual disease or just the loneliness or the disconnection? No, the disease.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
The plan was not, there was no plan, it felt like.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
Because you can't know a business unless you know the inventory, right? How can you do anything?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
Yeah, I agree. That's how it feels. Well, that's another issue that we just have. We don't have enough parties. We don't have enough parties, and there's not enough – and I think that it's also kept that way as capitalism is just – there's only so much you can do. It's like you can only do so much.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
And then there's a lot of darker forces at play, I think, that just care about finances no matter what side of things you're on. And then I don't even know if America still owns itself anymore, to be honest with you. I feel like we're just – LLC of the middle East sometimes, but you know, different people think different things.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
But let's talk about some escapes for men. Let's talk about how do men, you know, how do we combat like some of this illness and because men are resilient, men are warriors. I believe in our hearts and, um, and in our spirits. And I believe that I've seen enough connectivity amongst men that we want, um,
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
U.S. Men's Shed Association has partnered with Grouper to offer eligible members age 65 or older payments for staying healthy and socially active. Okay. So the men's sheds, can you do an image of it? Can we just do men's shed movement images?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
Yeah, that guy is obviously trying to be like, sexy buddies or whatever, I think. And I think, yeah, you got to find something to do together, paint something, look for something. Let's go look for something.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
Boys and girls, like join your local boys and girls club chapter. You can volunteer there. What's another one? You can be a champion.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
Oh, you don't realize as a parent, if there's a kid hanging out of your house, sometimes one of your kids, friends or something, you have a ton of influence on that kid.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
I mean, I got so much influence from most of my influence.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
Oh, that's a great point. Yeah, one of my greatest influences was this guy Charles Aldrich. He was my teacher. He was missing a finger. How did he lose his finger? You know what happened to him? He was at a baseball game cheering on his son. He stood up. His wedding ring got caught on a piece of metal on the bleachers and pulled his finger right off.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
I do know I wish I hadn't asked now, but God bless him. Pretty crazy. And my dad was missing a finger. And so I just related. I was like, oh, God wants these men without fingers to love me or whatever. You know, that's how I was thinking as a kid. It was just crazy. But that's how you think as a kid.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
Well, for sure, because I think also you... I don't know if ever in my life there's been like a... like a lot of organizations where it's like, Hey, men need help. You know, it's like, everything is that women need help with this children, you know? And it's certainly, that makes sense.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
No, no, no. He was a Korean veteran. He'd fought in the Korean War.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
Especially when we had a great TV show here called Prince Vice Principals or whatever. And that shit, you'd think what it helped it was with Danny McBride was in it. How long ago was that? It's a couple of years ago. So it might help a little bit. But definitely might have upped the vibes of some of these guys being teachers.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
So maybe you just need to influence that. Like, I remember when I was a kid, they had Coach was on and stuff like that. But I guess it didn't really resonate that much. But they had, like, what was that TV? Oh, Art Dead Poets Society or whatever. Yeah, Robin Williams. Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
But I guess there was the one with the set up with Tech of Mans. Who's that guy? Malcolm L. Jackson or whatever that guy's name was. No, he looks like kind of older, but still. They set up with Tech of Mans 600 years to get out of the CF prison. You know what I'm talking about? I do not. He talks like that? No.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
He's in Shawshank Redemption. You know what his name is? Morgan Freeman. He played a school teacher. Really? Lean on me, it was called.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
Um, I always think back to like women and children first, like when the Titanic was sinking or something, you know, when something like that, it's like women and children first. Right. And that's probably what most men would want as well. But at a certain point you're like, Hey, uh, we exist. What are we doing here? You know? Yeah. Um,
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
We asked him to come on here. We asked him and Kamala to come on here. But I would have loved to have talked with Tim Walz.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
Oh, his whole interview, he seemed like this cheery kind of guy.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
Yeah, I think, I don't know if it felt like all the time he was making all of his own choices. That's the only thing about some of these parties. You start to wonder if there's bigger powers. And then you're like, and you can feel that sometimes it feels like, but I don't know.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
Right, they get a feel for them. They get a feel for them, exactly. And some of them ask, do we get edit or something? Like Timothee Chalamet came on, they didn't ask for one edit. They didn't ask to look at anything. They didn't ask. I was like, that's wild, you know? I mean, but they didn't. And then we've had other people come on and they're, you know,
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
they're aging or whatever we get all fucking nitpicky or whatever some little fucking lizard and uh well ask to edit stuff out or just like say certain things now i didn't know that was something horrible happened somebody dies or something we'll edit it out you know it's like we don't want something horrible or somebody turning blue you don't want to talk about somebody can't breathe or whatever like yeah we're not gonna fucking sit there and ask questions to somebody who doesn't have but anything short of that so if i die oh two to their brain you might
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
What was your first relationship like with your dad or something? Just so we have some personal attachment to this conversation as well. What was it like with your dad when you were a kid? Because that's usually people's first male role model, yeah?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
I know. I still wish he would come on and talk to us. Maybe he will now. Maybe he will now. That's a good point. I'm going to reach out again. We even tried to get Kamala after to see if she would come on and talk to us. Because that's the only thing. I just felt like you don't know who some of these people are. And not even that you do after a conversation, there's still a politician. Right.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
Right. but at a certain point you just can get a feel for them and also people at home can just get a feel you know just you want a little bit more feel these days you had Bernie on recently yeah it was great have you had him on before we had so much fun no I'd have him on again though dude we had a blast we just have so many things that you know we both care about it seems like um
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
Yes, so places that men can get involved. It's like a Big Brother program. Do you know this about Big Brother program? If you're only going to be in town for a couple weeks, make sure it's going to be a place where you're going to be able to commit. Because you're saying to a child or something, I'm going to be there every other week or every two years.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
So that's something right there. And even just men getting together to like take a walk together, think together, you know, spend time together. It's like, how do we start to build those new things? Yeah. And also some of that is like the cycle has changed. You know, a lot of our energy came from wars and stuff, you know, and there were a lot more bowling leagues. There's a book.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
Yeah, it's just hiding from your wife for an hour and you and your buddies calling each other fat, right? Right. But that's what men need sometimes, right?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
Right. Yeah. You don't want to tell your wife. Yeah. I'm just going to hang. You know, it's like, yeah, I'm going to do something. That's a man thing too, is doing something like we're creatures that are supposed to be in action. Right. It's like the more sedentary I get, you know, like I just noticed that it's like, if I do the next right thing I'm supposed to do, everything goes fine.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
The second I stand around and think it's like things get a little weird.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
Yeah, just keep it moving, man. And it does help. It helps you. But then, yeah. But what was I thinking? Oh, I wrote down. Was I making a point there or no? I can't remember. I wrote down this question because I thought a lot about this, like men and women stuff, right?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
And I'm glad that we talked a lot about it like just because, yeah, women have had this sort of evolution in a way societally and financially. And they had to do that. It felt like to get more respect. And maybe if there had been a different respect in the beginning, things could have been different. But we live in a capitalistic society type of thing.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
And so I wrote down what I wanted to say because it was too hard for me to remember and say. So I was saying it seems like through the feminist movements and trying to make more gender equality, close the income gap, etc., that women were striving to have what men had.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
Such as more income, such as more equitable treatment, such as being able to strive in the workforce, having more access to educational opportunities, etc. That women wanted more power or what was conceived of as power. And in a capitalistic society, money is power. But is it really power though?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
I think it is pretty lonely and disconnected when men achieve the status of being powerful either through a lot of recognition or wealth or just producing a lot in general. I'm not saying that men could not have this type of power and not be connected to the world around them and people around them, but I think for most men it was basically lonely and disconnected.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
Is this what women really want when it comes to equitable treatment, et cetera, or having the same opportunities for financial success and upward mobility? Do women really want what men have or had?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
I wonder if women are really the ones that, generally speaking, have it right as far as being connected to others, being able to communicate better generally, and providing more of a home in the sense of a settled space around themselves. wherever they go or wherever they are. I think it's interesting that in trying to balance out male and female, the female wants to move towards the male.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
I get it, but I just wonder if maybe it made more sense to have the male move towards the female. And I don't mean that men should be women. What I do mean, though, is that these attributes that women seem to possess based primarily on their sex and some gender roles seem to be more fulfilling overall.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
So wouldn't it make more sense that the men would move a little closer to them or the women would tout that what they have is good enough and it is best instead of going ahead and trying to get what the men have? Like I said, I get it and I can understand why women want what they perceive men as having.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
I just wonder if that's really the best direction for women and for children and for men in general. and for people in general, do we really want to show our children that women can dominate and produce in the same ways that men can? Personally, I don't really think so. I think men have it wrong. I think that the men should be masculine and women should be feminine.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
But I think that the expression of masculinity, generally speaking, in our society has been kind of weak and kind of disconnected. And honestly, sometimes kind of dumb. Sorry, that was so much words. That's good. But I just did it. I was trying to like, I was like, I can't remember this, but this is like what I think, you know, like, it's not a clown on women or that their journey or anything.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
This sounds like a bit of a – It's crazy that I'm shocked. It's crazy that it's become in this world that that's a shocking thing.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
It's just like, what are, what are we all really looking for? You know?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
Yes. To be you. Yeah, to let yourself be seen. Yeah. Yes. And to feel equal, to feel like, oh, I can do these things as well. To get equal respect, right?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
Yeah, and how do we even – yeah, how do we just – yeah, and evolution takes pain. It takes discomfort for everyone. Change is hard. Yes, change is hard. And also I think though you look at like people having the time to do things in the evenings and stuff. Yeah. It's like we create – like a lot of people live in separate households. I talk about it with the holidays.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
The holidays are a bummer a lot of times now because you got to go visit – both your parents have been married two times and divorced. Now you're visiting six people or something on a – you're dividing your Christmas up. It's like we're dividing up the –
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
Well, politics is just – it's a societal structure. I know it's – at some point, it's something you need for diplomacy and stuff. But I don't even – I feel like it's been so commandeered. I don't think most people even know what it is anymore or don't believe in the sanctity of it. But I do think that in the end, you – that other humans are your real government. Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
you know, your neighbor is your government, you know, norms, it's the atmosphere, it's the tradition, whatever you're, you know, and I think it is men need to just wake up, shave, put on a clean shirt and be ready for, you know, whatever blessings do come with the things that they create for themselves too. I think some of it is like just showing up for the day in the world.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
Um, but also we need to, if we could, it would be nice. We need to, what the fuck do I know? But it'd be nice if families were together in that, um, that everybody didn't have all these separate homes to go. It was just everything didn't feel so divided. I feel like even managing a life feels very dividing for a kid when one week they're here, one week we're there.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
And then the parents are separate, and they probably sit there, you know, yeah, maybe they go on – but they wish maybe they'd have been able to figure – I don't know. What do I know? I think I romanticize a lot.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
Yeah, you're right. Yeah, I just have this romantic view. But yeah, I think if... Yeah, being a father is just being a father.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
And there's your dad right there. Get a gander at him. What's his name? Phil? David. David, yeah. That's a proper British name as well.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
yeah, I just appreciate you thinking about stuff, this stuff with Richard. And I know there's a lot of other things we could talk about too, about, um, recovery programs and 12 step. We can save that for another conversation.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
I feel like we've had, I feel like this has been a nice conversation and, um, just some good food for thought and, and not to harp on man or what's going on. And if you feel uncomfortable, it's like, I think there is that there's a sense inside of a lot of us of like, what do we do? Where, where is my purpose? And, um, and where's that coming from? You know? And, um, And that's okay.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
Me too, Richard. I appreciate it. Richard Reeves, you have books out, don't you? Yeah. Of boys and men. Okay. Excellent. And how do people, if people want to get involved with your organization, what do they just donate? Is there volunteer possibilities or what are the things? Donations would be.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
I love hearing about it, man. And I appreciate you just being patient with me too today while we just kind of had this conversation. And yeah, this was a great practice for me and just like learning to talk and think about things together.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
Well, yeah, it's just so important, man. And I'm going to have an ad too at the end of this for Valor Recovery. It's a...
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
sexual uh uh sex and love addiction uh group that we um that i associate with and so uh if you're struggling with porn addiction and that sort of thing you are in intimacy disorders anything if you are just struggling with something we can um that's a great program right there and uh my great friend steve started it and i've been in recovery with him for years and just blessed man blessed to be on this journey and just know that other men are on it too and trying to figure it out and
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
You know, stay alive, dude. It kind of gives you some, you know, it's weird. It kind of gives you a little bit of purpose.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
It sure isn't, man. Thank you so much, Richard Reeves. Thank you. You bet.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
And what happens to a lot of that information from think tanks?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
Yeah. And is that the bad one or what's the bad one?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
Well, the Scottish is the easiest. Yeah, everybody's like, the Scottish are over there eating their own teeth, you know. We can agree on that. No, I love the UK because everybody just rips on the other group, you know, rips on the other part of it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
But nowhere stronger than in the UK. No, it goes deeper. Yeah, you go on stage in Ireland, you're like, fuck England. And they just, they will cheer for the... They cheer off the other side, right?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
Oh, so the English and the Welsh are against each other even. Oh, crikes.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
Yeah, for sure. And I was going to talk, yeah. And just so I can, just so I'll relate my own. Yeah. My dad, my dad was older when I was born. My dad was 70 when I was born. So he was an older guy. So I think I had this like this almost like fear all the time that my dad was going to be hurt or die maybe, you know, because it was always just kind of scary, you know, like, um,
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
You know, like he would drive and he would ask us where we were going or if we could turn. And I was just a kid. I'd be standing on the passenger seat and we're standing up and like getting up and like looking at the lights. And I'd be like, it's good. You know, it's green or bad or something. And I remember one time I got it wrong and he just drove right out.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E562 Richard Reeves
Yeah. I was helping out, you know, because sometimes he would park too close under the lights or whatever, you know, he'd wait at an intersection in the middle of the intersect. You know, he's just old, you know, he was just, you know, he was like 80 something at that point. And so it was just bizarre. You know, I think it was a very bizarre kind of like probably fatherhood connection.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
Yeah. Well, yeah, it's crazy. Well, there's that famous video that got shared a few years ago, like during COVID, when it was like every channel was reporting the same. It was just the same script.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
So you're saying that a lot of times mainstream media is also right-wing media.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
But so then when people say mainstream media, then I guess what then what did it because it always felt to me like, yeah, that every outlet was just always super liberal. That's what it felt like.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
Yeah, well, that's yeah, that seems to be I think it feels so far away from being. Like the people feel so far away from being represented. And I feel like that seems like it's gotten further and further in my lifetime. I can't tell if it's just because I'm getting older. And so you hear about more stuff like that or if it's actually true.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
But I think people just feel like, you know, like, why are we having to audit our own government? You know, whether or not the means that they're going about it are good or not. But it's like it's. It's like the fact that people are cheering to have our own government audited. The fact that it's like, yeah, that 80 percent of the people would would say they don't support what's happened in Gaza.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
But yet we would still send money to Israel. Like, I think Trump has done that.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
You still see a lot of great, like there was a beautiful video. I'm not sure if it was AI or not, of them trying to celebrate Ramadan the other night in the rubble. Oh, the long table? Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
Well, that's, I think that's before October 7th, but like a year ago, people would be afraid to have, I think this Congress to, to, to people be afraid. Oh, for sure. Including us. Like I'd be afraid, I'd be afraid that,
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
Oh, well, dude, you got to be pretty, you have to have an open attitude to even think that way in third grade.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
um but no he's just been he's been on a unabashedly afraid to share about Palestine you know yeah no he's had his heart changed I think his heart's in the right place like I think he's he's uh doing great he was from the beginning about I mean he was early on it yeah yeah not like 10 he hasn't been but since it became like a hot more of a hot button issue in the past three or four years for sure
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
Yeah, dude, that is style. That's... Yeah, I mean, yeah, it's definitely very stylish. My good friend Aaron, he started a company called John Elliott. Yeah. I feel like I've heard of that. Yeah. They have them, like, now in, like, in Nordstrom. And it's, like, a – they have, like, it over, like – I think it was, like, right after, like, G-Star kind of came out.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
Well, I just think it's... Honestly, bro, some of it I think is kind of pussy. And I hate to say that because some people don't have pussy. They don't believe in them or whatever. But it's like... I think if your military is so great, send in snipers and get the bad guys. That's how I feel.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
But that's the part to me. It's like send in some – if those are the bad guys, send in and get the – like do some – it just felt like this – I don't know. It just started to feel gross and then – The great thing was it feels like you couldn't hide it from a nation. You could not hide from the world that what they were doing was wrong.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
But going back to what you're saying, how much are we complicit in so many of these types of things that happen in different countries? And do we need to be?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
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E567 Hasan Piker
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
Like, G – I got into some G-Star for a little bit. Oh, you got some G-Star? That was, like, as, like, let me see what we're doing kind of as I got. I would like to have more fashion sometimes. I just don't know if I – I don't care. Well, you got to look. I get too overwhelmed. I like knowing like there's about 17 or 18 things that I wear that'll be okay.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
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E567 Hasan Piker
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This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
Why is there such a strong bond between America and Israel? I've heard Candace Owens saying that she thought it was blackmail. But what do you why do you think there's really such a strong bond?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
So what you're saying, I think it's like – that's one of the things that makes it tougher. The more information you learn, I think, in the world, it's like – The shittier things seem. Yeah, in some ways. But the reality of things, you just see the reality. It's like, yeah, you need – and if you were playing a game of Risk and you were these powerful people, how would you operate and –
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
Yeah, it just gets to – it gets to be tough to find out, OK, well, then what does being an American still mean to me? And then also that things are so conflicting and dangerous out there amongst these like leaders and powers that you have to – you have to like kind of put a flag in something for yourself. Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
just to kind of get to because otherwise you'll just be sort of aimless it feels like um well i mean i think i i don't know if i'm even explaining that fully right but you got to stand for something is that what you're saying if you don't stand for something you fall for everything yeah so here's what i think it's like the more we learn about um history the more we learn about just like um the the
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
the like well America did these things and some of it 9-11 could have been the result of some of that just as more as you start to learn that America hasn't always been this perfect partner and this that it just starts to test like okay well what does it mean to be an American to me but then
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
At the same time, you need to be an American because you live in a country that's safe and you're able to operate here within the country. So it's – I don't know. It just makes it kind of interesting. Does that make sense?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
But do you think that's a culture thing? What culture is your family from? I'm Turkish. Okay, so in Turkey, is that a thing? Do you see just this ever in Turkey?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
Okay, so take us back. Our listeners, if we get too much information, a lot of them don't. They're going to tune it out. Well, I think if it's new information for me, I shouldn't say them. If it's new information for me, it's hard for me to go along.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
I am the problem. But OPEC is the oil... Yeah. So OPEC is like an oil NATO.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
Right, so they're saying, oh, there's only so much oil. Even though there's as much as they want, they kind of want there to be.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
Subsidies means they get kickbacks from the government.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
Yeah, I saw a guy with a huge beard the other night at a comedy show. I think it was in Ohio. He had a huge beard. And then an Edgar, that kind of Mexican kind of Edgar cut in the front. I love that. Oh, it was great. This guy was ginger. I mean, probably Amish or recently Amish or once removed or whatever. And he had had like – How did that work?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
But in a time – Oh, because that company owns so much of the actual market of whatever that product is that if they wanted to adjust it, they could do it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
Yeah, I mean, like you're saying, it's like the more you learn, you have to then decide, okay, you almost have to differentiate – Well, what does it mean to be an American to me?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
Because if I stay here and I sleep under this banner of America where I can make money and I can have – and there's a welfare system and I'll be at their – people have ideas of whether they're good or bad and those – but that I stay here. I continue to stay here. I keep myself here. This is where I choose to be in the safety of this place. Mm-hmm.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
You know, it's like, well, how complicit am I or am I just an American? And this is this is the I got blessed into this place and this is where I am.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
And if somebody else weren't born in this place and they were in a place that were, you know, more hostile and scary to live in and sleep in and try to survive in, wouldn't they be praying that they would be here or that they would have some of the same things? Yeah, everyone, everyone make any sense.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
Do I want it to be this constant net? Like, or do I want to not think about those things and think that those are the government's, you know, some of that's the government's responsibility. I do my best to elect and vote in a way that I think is meaningful and vote for the best person. And then I try to enjoy my life and take care of my family and my neighbor. You know, I think it's like,
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
I don't know. That's kind of how I think maybe I start to break it down in my head, you know?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
I mean, you could tell somebody in his – somebody had fucking – he probably had nails in his pocket. You know what I'm saying? He definitely – somebody had – somebody –
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
Yeah. And instead put a fucking rag and bone in every town. Yeah. I fucking hate rag and bone. Well, it's just like, dude, don't tear down cool areas and just put up a rag and bone, dude. It's not fucking cool. But no, man, it's interesting. I never really heard it put like that. And then, of course, the other things, you say these other things to people, that doesn't feel...
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
You got to point – you have to approach people with something they can point a finger at and whatever they're pointing at is close enough where they feel like it can be reached. Yeah. Like those are things that it's like – But also, those are things, like, you label, like, Trump talked about them last night on some of the congressional address. I think it was the party address last night.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
We need black pilots. Dude, first of all, black people can jump better, so how are you not going to have a fucking black dude in a plane, bro?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
But still, dude, if I saw Michael Jordan in the cockpit, that bitch, we're going to stay up. That's how I'm feeling. Oh, 100%. Like, that's where I feel.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
Bring it up. See if we can. That's a good question. Because there seems to be these little times in history where it's like, okay, for this year, it's almost like they press a plane trouble button. And it's like, oh, now there's plane trouble.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
Full terms go to the Panera Store page on DoorDash. I want to say thank you for the support of our merch. Really, really appreciate it. And we have restocks. Those are in now. We've got gang, gang, bait and tackle. I'm upstairs. A lot of items are restocked. You can check that out. TheoVonStore.com. And again, thank you so much. Today's guest is one of the most popular streamers.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
Let me see what this even says. No, there were actually more plane crashes between January 1st, 2024 and February 1st, 2024 when you compare the same time period this year to last year. So there were more crashes.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
Oh, I thought this was one of those terror watch fucking charts, dude.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
You had a couple of them where it's like these planes almost hit each other. They would show you a video and I watched one of them two times. I'm like, I didn't, that shouldn't even look close to me. They're like, but they just label it that way. It's definitely kind of fascinating. Then once something happens, you start to hyper focus on it more. This episode is sponsored by better help.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
I've benefited from therapy. You know that Jeepers gosh. Oh, I still, and I need more. I can't even wait to get online with my therapist later this week. It's become a regular thing in my life, having somebody to talk to, especially as our world gets more disconnected at times. Think about your favorite leaders, mentors, and idols.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
They don't have all the answers, but they do know when to ask questions or seek support from their community. In a society that glorifies hyper independence, it's easy to forget that we're all better when we have a support system behind us. Better help. BetterHelp is there. BetterHelp is fully online, making therapy affordable and convenient, serving over 5 million people worldwide.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
Well, that's what I – dude, racism used to be so easy in America. Like when I was growing up, it was like easy, easy to do, easy to be racist. Now, I've been to these – it's almost like you have to have a chart. You have to have – a calculator to even be racist now, it feels like.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
You can build your support system with BetterHelp. Visit BetterHelp.com slash Theo to get 10% off your first month. That's BetterHelp, BetterHelp.com slash Theo. Would you consider yourself a Democrat?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
Yeah. I hate it when somebody tries to label like, oh, you're a mag or you're this type of thing. It's like that. I've never wanted to be put in a box my whole life. I don't feel like there's enough parties really to represent the people. And I think the more information you get and learn, I think a lot of people start to feel that way.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
Like, I don't know if this party really represents me, you know? But then there's such conglomerates of so many different little pieces that they almost are like, well, I like this person in this one. I like this person on the chess team or this rook. So I'm going to – they will get my vote because they have that player, right?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
But, yeah, I think that that's – I think as more people get more information and are able to look into things more that that kind of evolves.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
Yeah. Well, I think one thing about Trump was like, and I was like, fuck, it made you believe Because most people knew him from rap songs, probably, from being a rich white guy, having rich guy hair, and then from being on The Apprentice, right?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
Which was a very... Pretty monumental how that all shaped out.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
Yeah, what happened to the good old days? You could just point out the window and your stepdad just knew immediately what was going on.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
He's switched up. Yeah, I remember. He gave Flavor Flavor a job working at an ice cream shop or something one day. I remember seeing that episode. So, yeah, I mean, he was... I just thought there was a moment where it was like, oh, anybody – because you're right. He didn't seem like a political insider.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
He seemed like – I think he's always been this – or notoriously it seemed like he's just been this kind of like real estate, shady real estate executive guy, which I think at a certain point some people were like, oh, I'll take that. I'll take a – ruthless business guy as our president, because politics has become a ruthless business.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
But I think, yeah, I think there was a thing like, oh, anybody could be president. Right. So that in a way felt a little bit like the American dreamer, at least a little piece of like anybody. There was a feeling like, oh, he got it. There's because nobody thought he would win. Yeah, that's true. So I think there was that comeback piece to him, right?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
Well, people say let's go. Brandon is like a Trump thing.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
We're trying to make the races better. Yeah. Yeah, dude, because you said there's like a barrier to entry now.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
Oh, well, I think that we should have... I think women should get paid so that they can be at home with their children. And that way... Or a man, if one of them wants to work.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
And then the other one can be at home to be a parent. I wish that that was something that we did with our money.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
Well, I think people are getting to their wits and where it's like nobody believes that either one of these parties is doing anything. Right. I think you've had the same problems. You've had the same things happen time over time. And maybe some of it at a certain point you realize, well, that's just the cost of business. It's just like it's just become so bloated. It's become more about them.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
Like you're saying, more about corporations and less about everyday people.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
Sorry to interrupt you. I just want to. Was a series of domestic programs, public works projects and financial reforms and regulations enacted by President FDR in the U.S. between 33 and 38 in the 1900s with the aim of addressing the Great Depression, which began in 1929. Wow, dude. So he had to be right on the back of the Great Depression. Yeah.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
Because people always they always like they'll quote him all the time, you know.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
First of all, yeah. Dude, if I'm Elon Musk, I'm definitely getting a crazy dick. I'm getting a fucking designer dick. I'm getting a two-seater. I'll get a damn three-seater cock. Yeah, they're saying – I'll put suicide doors on my – if I'm Elon Musk. But here's what I would say is to kind of the thing about Elon is like – or just to discuss it really.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
I think people are like, we don't give a fuck who's auditing this thing. And finally, there's like, oh, this is the person to audit. This is the person that's going to audit. This is somebody we can blame if something fucks up. This is somebody that at least they're saying that they're going to audit the government. Like – Why do we even have to audit our own government?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
Well, the crazy thing is, though, now you have whoever our original auditing system was, and then you have this second, and now we have this second auditing system. But, dude, it goes to, like, It's so like I'll have a I'll have a financial like an investment banker. Right.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
Yeah, you can also get that USSR chart easily. A lot of those men you'll see meeting with very young girls at Starbucks, trying to get them involved in something a lot of times it seems like.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
But I there's times and I probably should want I want to hire somebody to audit my financial advisor because I'm like, is this guy stealing money? from me, you know, because you hear so many stories of people getting stolen from just like entertainment, different industries, whatever. But it starts to be like, I don't even know who to trust anymore.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
And I think that's where most people feel like it is. It's like, I don't know if most people necessarily feel like that Elon or Doge is the best, but it's like now it feels like, OK, well, there's a government system that's supposed to be doing this. And then there's a privatized system that's supposed to be doing this. Now, who's the crook? Who knows?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
But then I think people look to Elon and they say, well, at least he came when he bought Twitter, which was a brave thing to do. It felt like it opened up more opportunity for free speech, like things you couldn't share on there six years ago you could share on there now.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
Yeah, I guess I have the goatee. It's very simple, kind of. It's like I have a big nose, so I try to – you do little things to try and trick a wife or whatever, trick a – you want to have a spouse. So I have that, and then – I have a little bit more chin than my brother does. So I have a real chin in here. Some people it's, it's completely, it's a total mirage.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
Like, what the fuck? But that's the crazy thing. Now, people will just—you see things, and then you start to believe it. Oh, dude, I realize Twitter starts to— like it'll start to rot my mind. I'll start to get, and then it feeds you something. It's like, that's a scary. And that's another scary thing just about social media. It's about where we're at. Things just feel so.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
You don't know what to... You'll open it up. You'll close it. Now you're furious. All you were doing was looking for something on your phone. You're bored for 10 seconds. You opened it up. Now you got two links to some shit. Now you're furious. Now you close it. Now you're back in the grocery store where you were a minute ago. You're on the fucking food aisle, but now you are... You're angry.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
You're apeshit insane that a kid, a deceased kid somewhere...
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
Yeah. And then it's like you want to buy a pussy fart coin or whatever. And then you don't even know what to do. Retardio. Yes. It's like, oh, retardio is going to the moon. And you have all these fucking Klan members or whatever trying to sell it. It just... It's gotten... It's crazy.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
It's too much porn. It's too much porn because I'll be trying to take care of myself, doing decently. I'll just see something, an edge of a tit or something flies by. And then it just is like you can just get stuck pretty easy, jerking off or whatever. It gets – And then I get sad. And then I get ashamed of myself. And then I just, and then I don't even sleep in my bed on those.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
Like, dude, on nights like that, I will sleep on the couch. It's almost like, I don't even, it's like. Damn. I know. It's like I'm a, it's like I'm divorced in my own fucking, and I just live alone. It's like.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
Like, it's almost like I'm a husband that got caught jerking off. So now you're sleeping on the couch.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
Yeah, kind of, but if you've had so many nightcaps over like 20, 30 years, you're like, oh, I'm fucking – I'm an alcoholic at this point, you know?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
Like there's a guy that's in that power slap game and they can't even like, he has this huge, they can't identify where his chin begins.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
Oh, yeah. I had a buddy who had curtains put inside of his car and he would go and close them all so he could sit in his car and masturbate without feeling like, you know, like people were going to point at him or whatever.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
His Carl to start running on his own semen or whatever. I shouldn't have said that part. You had Bernie Sanders on your show. I did, yeah. Pretty cool, man. How awesome was that?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
Did you find it interesting that people cheered so much against him when they said that he also took money during like... Remember that a couple of months ago? Not a judgment against him. I think all these people... I think when you get into politics, right, it's almost like being in a big family.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
And if you want something done, it feels like you have to – it's almost just like – Took money from what, though? Well, what did they say that he took money from? Oh, RFK said it. That was – During that – when he was interviewing RFK.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
The figure cited by Kennedy referred to the industry in which individual donors were employed. Yeah. Okay. Because Kennedy said that Bernie Sanders got a certain amount of money. And this is just a clip. This actually goes to a perfect example of what we've been talking about where you see a clip of something, right? In 2020, this was the claim.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
Senator Bernie Sanders was the single largest receiver of pharmaceutical money in Congress. And the context was this figure cited by RFK Jr. referred to the industry in which individual donors were employed. It did not refer to funds originating from or directed by pharmaceutical companies.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
Yeah, I think it makes, I mean, it totally makes sense to me that that's the way that it could happen, you know?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
But it's so funny. RFK probably saw a clip or heard, you know, it's just like, it's so, it's like.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
What do you say? Consensus? Consensus. So there's no regional place you can go to except now almost your own gut or if you're influenced by clips or whatever, right?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
I feel you. But what I'm saying is, is that better than us all being under the influence of some consensus? I'm not disagreeing with you. I'm just looking at it.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
There is the one where it's crazy where sometimes, yeah, they cut the hair exactly...
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
I need to do a better job of that. I think of finding my information diet.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
And just where does it come from? It's not I just don't get enough of it. A lot of times a lot of times I operate mostly just like on my own feelings kind of. which is in the end kind of your instincts or whatever. But then I start to notice that things that I get influenced by and like my own algorithm and things, I was like, oh, I'm fucking getting influenced.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
You know, I'm up last night in the middle of the night and it's like, have I reposted too many TikToks about you?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
yeah oh that's no neck ed yeah he's doing real estate now too he was doing lemonade sale he was in like a he got caught up in big lemon or not big lemonade but like lemonade big lemonade he was so i know he's he got i think he was involved with lemonade for a bit i saw him selling uh he was involved with like a like a child like what do you mean
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
gaza you know and i'm up for 40 minutes last night laying in my bed and my brain's calculating but shit like that you know it's like but it's just because i'll get to my you know it's like none of it's bad stuff really but it's um i'll notice if i get on my twitter thing especially i'll get angry i get and then i'm like if i'm at least aware of this is happening people that aren't aware that aren't even thinking like oh this is affecting me they're just being affected yeah then it's like man
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
We have the Teamsters president, one of the Teamsters union presidents on.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
Oh, he does? Yeah. I didn't know that. I saw him at the inauguration. It's just interesting. I'd never talked to a Teamsters union president. I've heard of the Teamsters. I watched Newsies or whatever when I was a kid a bunch. But it was just interesting to see that – to learn about unions and see how they work.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
no like he was selling he got caught up ed and pete's there it is something like that or lemonade oh he like actually had his lemonade brand yeah he was selling it was like uh it was the opposite of you know they have like a long neck bottle that was the whole play on it oh oh that's weird i know that's such an odd thing that he was so he made like like a short and stubby one yeah
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
And then some people are like, well, once you get unionized, it's hard to – you don't have as much individuality. So if I'm super hardworking, I'm self-motivated, then maybe I don't want to be a part of the union. But I could see that as a safety net for people to have a union against corporations. Yeah. Yeah, to me it makes perfect sense.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
Yeah, Bernie has a good – Bernie had a good thing about that. He said that, well, if we're going to shorten people's work weeks – he was talking about having a shorter work week. Yeah. And then that since companies' profits are going up, then the employees, the amount that they should make should go up. It's like it shouldn't just be the company at the top that has the increase.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
Like that's why at a certain point it has to tip towards a actual revolution where people pick up. And I don't know if we can say this or not, but I'm, I mean, I say it all the time.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
Who wants that baby lemonade out of bed? Oh, he definitely looks like the kind of guy that you would just, you want to fucking crack open. He looks like that fancy syrup. You ever see the fancy bottle of syrup and it doesn't have, bring it up if you can. It's kind of light brown. There's a brown top on it. It's maple syrup, but it's wide.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
Really? I'm a big revolution guy. I've always had little dreams of like semi revolutions or like regional or whatever. At least I hope at least I can make it to the regional revolution. Like I understand if I don't make it to the national, but I want to be on a horseback or at least on a fucking standing next to a,
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
It's going to be somebody also who works at a renaissance fair full-time who can be on a horseback, who can handle the type of – when you think about it, I'm not even joking. It's kind of crazy, but you will need a dude who is fucking – I am willing to ride through here with a spear. But yeah, at a certain point, if you let so many people go –
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
Just to appease a company, to appease corporations, you're just going to have more – those people have to at some point – there has to be a revolution. Isn't that how revolutions happen?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
Are you talking about Guatemalans that came over the border and stuff?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
How would you – how do you successfully do something like that then? Because I think a lot of people's concern – well, I think here's what happens is you're like, I'm not safe anymore, right? And you start to feel – right, there's people that were raped or killed. There was a couple instances where they – that they put them on the news, right?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
They were on the congressional – they had some of those people.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
Right. So I think you hear about those things and you're like, well – Yeah, you'll start to apply them to everyone. Which is crazy.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
Because it's like – It's fear. Okay. So – because to me it's like – Have a fucking organized system. If I go to a dude, I go to I went to Canada a couple of days ago. It was heck. It was heck getting in and out of there. It's heck getting out of there. It's super organized. You know, it's like but we should just because here's the thing.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
If you don't know who's in your country, then you can't do a correct census. You can't allocate things correctly to people. You can't know who needs what in certain areas.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
Yeah, like an old brown jug. He kind of had that. Anyway, I feel bad we're making fun of the guy now.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
Bring that up. How did sanctuary cities get started? That's fascinating, man. Sanctuary city policies were not originally proposed by law enforcement.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
They argue that these policies help build trust between immigrant communities and local law enforcement. This trust is crucial for encouraging immigrants to report crimes and cooperate with police investigations. sanctuary policies allow police to focus on local priorities and prevent crimes. Wow.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
I wonder though, what's that? I'm sorry. What is the AI search engine or some shit? What is this?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
All right. I think it's interesting, though. I wonder how many cities then jumped on it as a – even on the Democratic side to say like – or left side, whatever you want to call it. But like to say, oh, I better be a part of this now if I want my voters to then vote for me. You know what I'm saying? So sometimes like –
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
The political kickball gets created one way, but it also gets used in a field in another way.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
Fuck head, bro. Yeah. No, but I saw the other day he was doing real estate, man. Hasan Piker, thanks for coming in, dude. Yeah, hell yeah. I appreciate it. Thanks for having me. I know you're super busy, man. I admire—I admire, first of all, how streamers, how— The effort it is, it almost seems like it's like one of those races in the Olympics that it's like an endurance game.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
Oh, yeah, you can't even... I mean, you fucking... Everybody's mixed now, it feels like.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
Yeah, so... It's probably Mexican a lot of times, I would bet. And that's just even my Mexican friends, they're always like... you know, my uncle's in the back or whatever they'll say, you know, and I don't say anything, but it's like, I, you know, I think it's interesting. It's interesting. Like what things get, how things get framed, right.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
By the media, how things get used, how things like even programs like sanctuary city, how does it then get manipulated and used as like a negative thing or is a thing where one party feels like, well, I better declare as this, or I'm going to be out of the money, whatever the next thing is. Like,
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
Yeah, it feels alarming. It feels like you have to have this military thing. I think one thing that I noticed last night was like the military has had a tough time getting recruits, right? Yeah. Recruitment has been down.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
And so part of me always wonders, well, like – Or did the powers that be then want Republicans to be in office because they know that eventually, if people are believing more in their country again, it will incite more recruitments? I'm not saying that that's the truth, but you just start to wonder what the fuck is really going on.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
But also just like your openness to like thinking about things. You don't seem like just like one type of person or like you could pigeonhole you.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
Jerking off on you or whatever. And you guys are changing each other's names after 8 p.m. or whatever and shit. I think shit gets pretty melodic out there.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
Or a lot of people will also go into the military, learn some patterns that help them to achieve well. My buddy Josh was in for a while. He got out, and now he's able to be a good business owner because he learned. You know, he got up in the morning. You know, it just helped him have some regimen.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
But even just in your own beliefs, like when you talk about political stuff, it's like –
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
He's a leftist political commentator. You can see countless clips of him debating social issues and political topics. I admire his work ethic and his pursuit of information and communication. I am thankful today for his time and our conversation. Today's guest is Mr. Hassan Piker.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
That's a great point. I think – and maybe – and I wish I knew more of what some of those groups did a lot of times. With the military? Yeah, but I agree with you. It's like I agree the fact that why are – why does the voter, why does the gun carrier, the water carrier, you're always at this – it's a caste system really in a lot of ways.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
You're, it is, those are the people having to do the bidding of these elites, you know, of these countries and stuff like that. But then at a certain point, it's like, do I decide this is my, what, what, what integrity or what do I want to have inside of myself when I'm doing that? I could be all day like, fuck, I don't want to be doing this. This country's a piece of shit or whatever.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
Or I can have pride in what I'm doing, no matter what. And the spot that I'm existing in is, in, um, this sort of strata. Right. And, and I stand up for my country and it's just, you know, as we get more information, it's just, uh, it's fascinating how things change.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
Unless you had some real gunners. Unless you had some cool Call of Duty, Verdansk, Modern Warfare dogs.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
Yeah, you would, but it would be significantly lower. It wouldn't be this system that gets manipulated and used. That's why they don't want to fix it, though. That's why they don't want to get free health care. But that's why they don't want to fix so many things. And that's what I'm saying. We learn more. As we learn more about it, you start to see some of the clarity or some of...
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
You learn more. You have more information. But then how do I operate still when I have that more information? It's tough because if I become a nihilist, then I'm miserable. My day-to-day is miserable. And I'm not disagreeing with you. I'm just saying it's how do we manage in those spaces as we learn more?
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
There's a fucking – there's a band – or not a band. There's some homeless guys stole, I guess, a band's high school equipment during COVID over by the – there's a park behind my apartment. Yeah. And you could hear them sometimes practicing in like 3 or 4 a.m. They get a couple dudes tuned up in a tent or whatever. And you could hear them. What song were they playing for a while? Oh.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
just gonna stand there and watch you burn i don't know what instruments they had but it was pretty cool you know they got a whole sheet music and everything you know but it's like yeah just making the most of where you're at um and also our military is there like you it keeps us safe if there's flooding if they do a ton of stuff yeah the army corps engineers like i interviewed a guy i don't want people to feel like their lives are in vain
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
I admire people that go and are willing to put their years of lives into anything.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
were cut if they help supported air safety uh president donald trump's administration has said no one at the federal faa with a critical safety position has been fired as it cuts the federal workforce some faa jobs were eliminated had direct roles in supporting safety inspectors and airport operations according to their union and foreign or former employees this is another way that they lie by the way and and karen bass did this with the la wildfires
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E567 Hasan Piker
I'm curious to see because Trump's making – and there's so many executive orders and things right out of the gate, and there's so much focus on him by the media too. But I'm curious to see if some of these things turn out to help long term. There's no way. I'm hopeful that they are.
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E567 Hasan Piker
Like I'm hopeful that if they're going to cut Medicare or Medicaid that it's also because they have the – they're going to make price transparency from hospitals, right? And so then there won't be – the expenses won't be as high, right? Like I'm hoping that there's some long-term strategy to a lot of his ideas. Like the same thing with – Gaza and Israel. I don't know if there is.
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E567 Hasan Piker
I think you couldn't find 30 of these people that aren't, it feels like.
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E567 Hasan Piker
I don't know if they should allow people to go from one to the other. From private to public, you know what I'm saying? Because obviously there's conflicts of interest when people do that sort of thing, you know?
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E567 Hasan Piker
Yeah, it says right here, Rick Scott's role in the Columbia HCA scandal. In 2003, Rick Scott's company, Columbia HCA, the largest private hospital chain in the U.S., was found guilty of defrauding Medicare. The company was forced to pay $1.7 billion a settlement. That was the largest medical fraud fine in U.S. history at the time.
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E567 Hasan Piker
Scott, who was the CEO, left the company with a $10 million severance package after the scandal. $300 million in stock options, too. Wow. So do you start to wonder, so this was when he was in the private sector, right? Yeah. So what's going to be different if a guy comes over from that private sector to the public sector? He's the richest congressperson, by the way. Is he really? Fuck that, man.
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E567 Hasan Piker
Give us some fucking money. I think people should only be able to have a certain amount of money.
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E567 Hasan Piker
It was awesome, man. My buddy Wayne, he's got a podcast now called Trash Talk. But, yeah. Yeah. Yeah, they do pretty well. But then what about LeBron's companies if they're buying shirts from another country? Yeah, yeah, yeah. And that labor there and those people, that guy's sleeping on a tricycle seat at night because he has to be at work again in the morning.
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E567 Hasan Piker
Yo no se, yo no se. I'm illegal. That's what I say. That's so funny. When the Jews come for me, I'll be like, I'm illegal. That's what I'm saying, dude.
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E567 Hasan Piker
they have a weather machine but imagine you're rich enough say you were rich enough like a mike uh not mike jones or whatever that's that rapper but i'm thinking of um uh bill gates right if you had enough money bro you would get it and some guys like look For one bill, I'll get you a weather machine. We'll get you – I'd get that bitch in a heartbeat, dude. Imagine you're sitting at home.
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E567 Hasan Piker
You're having your coffee. You're like, all right, Detroit, fuck you guys. Here's seven inches right now, dude. Here's seven white inches. It's really the only way that freaking a white guy can give seven to ten white inches anymore is by pressing that weather button. This is Bill Gates pressing the weather button. He's pressing the weather button. But no, man, I think it's –
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E567 Hasan Piker
Would you have had Trump come on your show? But first of all, thankfully we can still joke around about stuff and we can have a sense of humor. Imagine if we didn't as individuals have a sense of humor. That would be... I agree with you.
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E567 Hasan Piker
When he was out here, I ate all of it. Oh, you didn't like them? No, I liked them. I'm just sad that they're bipartisan snacks he's sending out.
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E567 Hasan Piker
It was the only friend of mine that did that. Very sweet of him. He's like, my mother wants to see those.
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E567 Hasan Piker
it's up it's up being friends with stavi is up that's why you can't trust the greeks oh now look finally as a turkish man we're both let me tell you both sided agreement all right yeah bipartisanship on that front for sure you cannot trust these greeks yeah the third month of his calendar is gorgonzola or whatever i'm like this seems like it was like january february march april baklava june july i'm like that seems
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E567 Hasan Piker
We're going to have to talk about that next time. Would you have Trump won if he would podcast with you?
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E567 Hasan Piker
Do you feel like you're that far removed from getting to talk to guys like that? No.
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E567 Hasan Piker
Like, they wanted to do, like, a video, like, let's do some social video. And I was like, I don't want to do something like that.
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E567 Hasan Piker
He was definitely, my body, my body, yeah. I think he definitely was one of the early, he was almost like a rapper in a way, like with the pills. I think he had the women. Bring up Rush Limbaugh's wife. Let's even get a. No.
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E567 Hasan Piker
But he didn't come. I mean, they didn't ask for any edits, you know? That was the thing. They didn't say, like, we need to see this. They didn't fucking have you guys have a good day.
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E567 Hasan Piker
But I'm also not a political guy. This is a trap I fell into recently.
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E567 Hasan Piker
Well, because I think my goal is to find – it's not a goal, but I just want to get to know people kind of, right? And I realized – I fell in this trap recently. I thought that just because I had some political people on last year that I knew about politics. I do not. That was a trap. Even my own ego was like, oh, maybe I know something about politics. I don't know shit. Now I have some ideas.
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E567 Hasan Piker
I know what it feels like to be kind of like I feel like just a pretty regular person. And then I don't know. I try to find empathy here and there and figure things out. But – But I'm – and I'm learning a lot. I've definitely learned a lot more than I knew two years ago for sure.
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E567 Hasan Piker
But then to think that I – like I have to be careful not to like smoke my own nuts or whatever it's called where it's like you just – just because I had some politics on, now I'm fucking Jim Rome or somebody or like a – like a – Malcolm X. Malcolm X. Malcolm X, yeah. Malcolm X. But anyway, but no, dude, I like your attitude. I like your charisma. I like that.
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E567 Hasan Piker
I wanted to talk a little bit more about, I know you have a program where you try to co-op and put money back into things that mean something to you.
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E567 Hasan Piker
And we could get together another time and talk about business strategy and things like that. I think it'd be interesting. But yeah, I just wanted to just... And yeah, we do a lot of fundraising.
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E567 Hasan Piker
Dude, yeah. No, I appreciate you even saying that because I think that's something I need to hear more about. It's on my brain and heart a lot. We started a foundation last year, but haven't started to figure out what to do with the money or what exactly to do. I would like to create a business that – I thought about water. You're selling water, but the money goes towards –
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E567 Hasan Piker
rehab for people that suffer from opioid addiction you know that sort of thing just so it's like using something that everybody needs but finally the proceeds it only goes towards this thing there's not even a profit you know it's like this is what it's for but I need to be more I've done that in the past too like I have merch and it's US made, union made
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E567 Hasan Piker
I've seen, yeah, sometimes you get a, yeah, she has a very, who does she look like a little bit? I've never seen his wife. Or someone's widow Catherine.
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E567 Hasan Piker
Yeah. Yeah, that's – yeah, I'm glad you say these things because, yeah, it's just stuff that I can remember to try to focus more on. Yeah, because everybody – that's the crazy thing. It's like everybody at every point of something, most people need – Or they need some type of support. They need an ear. They need a blanket. They need a mouthful of – they need a friend.
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E567 Hasan Piker
There's a lot of ways to be a part of the world and always to try and find a corner where you can express care. Hasan Piker, thanks so much, dude. I'd love to chat again sometime. I know we didn't get to cover some stuff we did, but I just appreciate it, man. I think – Yeah, I just think it's important too that people just get together and talk about stuff.
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E567 Hasan Piker
I wish I'd have been able to kind of like have probably some stronger political conversation with you. Some of that stuff I don't have as strong of a knowledge base in. But I admire you, dude, and I admire the way you operate, and I really appreciate your time today. All right, thanks for having me, man. This was great. I'm sorry I have to do a stream for so long, too, dude.
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E567 Hasan Piker
Oh, damn. No, they didn't. That part I made up, but I would just protect their anonymity. But it just, you know what I'm saying? Like, just, just, it's like people, I think people, I don't know. We're all trying. I think, yeah, I have a neat community too that I feel like wants to do stuff that's important in the world. And we're all trying to figure out how, you know?
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E567 Hasan Piker
And Tori Spelling a little bit, too. She looked like, if you go back one, Tori Spelling was probably before your time. But, oh, yeah, she does. Yeah, I never looked at his wife. Yeah, I'd never seen a picture of her before.
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E567 Hasan Piker
But yeah, I, I, I just, I see that light in you, man. And I appreciate you coming and sharing your time with us today. I really do. All right. Thanks for having me. You bet, man.
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E567 Hasan Piker
You just think like, yeah, I guess what are people's – I don't know. Yeah, I guess it's good that I'm not doing that. What's one of the toughest things about streaming that people don't understand though?
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E567 Hasan Piker
We had Bassem Youssef and we definitely have tried to like learn some about it. I think in the end for me, it just became like my feelings just tell me that it's, just messed up what's happened to those people. It's like, and that a lot of it was covered up by the media or they didn't want you to share certain information or you weren't allowed to.
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E567 Hasan Piker
So when you say that, do you mean that they're all in on the same, it's all kind of the same ruse, do you mean?
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E567 Hasan Piker
Do you think that that's starting to get upset even by like podcasting, streaming? Do you think that that apple cart starting to change? It feels like.
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E560 Antonio Brown
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E560 Antonio Brown
Let me think of how they call it. I'm trying to think of the term for it. That shit is swaggy, though. I ain't going to lie. I think it's... Yeah, some people call it that. I never... Oh, it's a rat.
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E560 Antonio Brown
It wasn't like a lot of dads that were like doctors and shit like that.
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E560 Antonio Brown
Yeah. Now I see that. I never really thought about that concept before that the dad couldn't come back because it would affect.
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E560 Antonio Brown
I didn't thought about it like that. You know what I mean? Well, in our neighborhood, in our area, a lot of the black girls got, they all got, um, um, over the summertime after seventh grade.
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E560 Antonio Brown
Yeah. I haven't seen it. Yeah, I don't see it. Yeah. I mean, I've seen some of it online. I don't need to see any right now. You know what I'm saying? I'm good. I hope these shades block out black dick, bro. You feel me? Because I ain't trying to see any today, bro.
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E560 Antonio Brown
So then I have to go over and try to get some sex with the lady? I mean, no, they telling you, did you nut in that?
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But I think for me, it's just... Oh, we on right now?
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E560 Antonio Brown
What up? Dude, the cracker of the year this year was Shane Gillis, man. Congratulations, dude.
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E560 Antonio Brown
We fucking here, though. Some people call it a mullet. I think it's just as is, man. You want to go shades today? We can do them. What do we got?
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E560 Antonio Brown
You did? But no, that's a big thing that happened for Trump was they put him on all of those charges, right? He was in court every week. And then they tried to shoot him. They tried to kill him. And so that's, if anything, if any group could probably relate to some of that type of energy. Of course. Black community. They trying to kill us every day. You know about Martin Luther King.
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E560 Antonio Brown
Oh, what? Accident? Assassinate? No, we just tried that one. Uh.
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E560 Antonio Brown
Never one. When other time has it happened where a chopper just went off like that? Yeah, and it was for Kobe Bryant, though.
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E560 Antonio Brown
Well, why? First of all, if we live in a country where it's free, where the communication.
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E560 Antonio Brown
Well, why didn't we all just get the truth? You know what I'm saying? Why the files have to be, like, why is there a secret files?
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E560 Antonio Brown
Black Linceaga, bro. Yeah, it's like they're just fucking you over. Well, did you see some of the stuff I've seen is that people are, they're trying to accuse him of being a homosexual.
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E560 Antonio Brown
You see how he look? You think Martin Luther King is not getting pussy? Oh, yeah. I could see him definitely getting some.
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E560 Antonio Brown
Let me see what we got. You got some of those? Yo, put those shit on. 7-Eleven Classics. Are they? Yeah, Gas Station Movie Theaters. 7-Eleven, 7-12, bitch. Welcome. Let's go. We taking it to the next level in these bitches. We going to the movie theaters. We got to go 3D. All right, we going 3D out the gate, boy. Right to the movies.
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E560 Antonio Brown
Well, they want to. Why do they do that, though? It could be a character assassination.
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E560 Antonio Brown
You know what I'm saying? But when they say who, when you say they are, does it mean like, are you talking the FBI, the CIA?
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E560 Antonio Brown
Don't ask me, bro. If you ask me, I don't know. Nothing to do with it. I got nothing to do with it.
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E560 Antonio Brown
They always say Theo Vaughn. They don't just say TV. I'm trying to think of who, if some people says TV or not. Some people might say it, but I don't know. It's a good question.
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E560 Antonio Brown
Yeah, and some of the ways to do that is humor. I agree, man. Humor, right? You a funny motherfucker. Well, thanks, man. You are too, dude. Thank you, bro. You definitely, you went about it some unique ways too that's like your own thing. I think you're really unique. Thank you, brother.
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E560 Antonio Brown
Did you always have a desire to be, like, I know this is kind of a strange question, but did you always have a desire to be unique or to be different? I just like be myself, man. I feel like in life, It's free to be who you are. But were you always like that as much or were you more of like, was there a point where you're like, you know what? I'm just going to do things how I want to do them now.
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E560 Antonio Brown
Right, so was it even something you think he wanted? Because I feel like this, and I wonder if there's a lot of young black men, right, young black women that do sports that don't even really want to be doing them, but it's a means to an end because at some point it was kind of the only choice. I think there's more choices now.
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E560 Antonio Brown
You know, and that's just my outsider judgment. I'm not saying that I know that, but it seems like- No, you do know that.
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E560 Antonio Brown
Yeah. Yeah, I'm trying to think of what a good nickname for me would be. What's your nickname, A.B.?
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E560 Antonio Brown
I see what you're saying. Right there, you're creating some sense of individualism just by not going with the mainstream that is in those types of neighborhoods to have a little bit more drugs and violence going on.
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E560 Antonio Brown
But do the people in the neighborhood that are committed to the more hectic lifestyle and the more trenched behavior, do they look down upon guys who are trying to get out?
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situation now affect what i could be and what i could do because in this situation right here i could make it better and then once there's enough better avenues other the the younger yous coming up start to see better opportunities better opportunities oh i remember yeah when i was growing up the black kids in my area they didn't have we had like the best job you could have it felt like
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E560 Antonio Brown
was a school teacher, right? We had a couple of black female school teachers. We had an assistant principal, Raleigh Coleman, shout out, RIP. And he used to sleep in the trunk of his car at lunch a little bit. He used to catch him a little break, catch him a little nap. He used to look probably one time I was over by the fence. I saw him getting in that bitch. I'm like, damn, what's Raleigh doing?
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E560 Antonio Brown
he was catching a little nap but they didn't have like a lot like I remember dude it wasn't until a few years ago I went to a doctor for the first time that was a black doctor that's what I seen you never I've never seen and I never thought that I never seen it before I've seen black doctors on television I'd seen but you know and I I'd probably met black doctors but I'd never been into the room you're like okay you're gonna go meet with the doctor and you get in there and it's a black guy like damn is he gonna know what's wrong with me you know I just my brain didn't
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E560 Antonio Brown
with it. Yeah, it was just different. So then I started to think, well, I wonder what it was like for black people always going to white doctors and then be like, does this doctor care about like, just even just the thought in your head, right? Yeah. So that was just, it's definitely interesting. I think you never really see people.
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E560 Antonio Brown
Yeah, it's in the history, man. Damn. Well, yeah, and I think I always... Like, you fucked some black pussy before, right? Well, let me think about some of this. Yeah. I, yeah, I definitely. Okay.
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E560 Antonio Brown
Oh, they love to get out there and catch some drawings, you know, animations. They should have an Asian... Like Asian Pokemon championships. Yeah, that'd be cool. That's something I would love to witness more of. AB, good to see you, man. Thank you, man. How you doing? I'm alive, man. You know, it's a lot of pressure out there. Facts. The trenches are getting fucking tight. Real tight.
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E560 Antonio Brown
You know what I mean? Oh, yeah, buddy. I know what you mean. That's normal, man. That's normal behavior. Let me think about this. You know, there was I definitely I envied black culture sometimes. I mean, a lot of people envy black culture because black culture is where like people take a product to make it cool. Right. So a lot of times a company will come out with a product.
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Nowadays, they attach a black artist to it or put it through the black community in some way. And then it makes it cool. Right.
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E560 Antonio Brown
Of course, because black... I don't want to say I'm accusing of that or anything. I'm just saying that that's what I've heard. Does that make sense to you?
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E560 Antonio Brown
Shit getting sticky. Sticky. Bro, somehow I have to leave my shoes and just walk off in my socks, bro.
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E560 Antonio Brown
That's it, huh? Yeah, that's it, bro. That must have been the best day whenever you quit your job. Yeah, that was the best, bro. Because I think there's a part of that, bro, where everybody could feel. Because everybody wants to take their shirt off and walk out there. Take that moment, right? Yeah. But some people can't. Buy FedEx. Buy fucking, what's another good company? UPS.
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Full terms go to the Panera Store page on DoorDash. Today's guest is a former NFL wide receiver, a pro bowler, maybe one of the greatest NFL receivers of all time. He played for the Pittsburgh Steelers, the New England Patriots, briefly for the Buccaneers, and possibly for the Raiders.
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That's a good point, bro. All these dickheads. Every time the white, the kicker goes in, the truth should be all these black guys couldn't win the game. All these fucking guys couldn't do it. And they trying to act like now it's up to me.
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He went overtime right there. He did overtime at the end. But you got to look good for your moment too.
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Now, what about him? Now, how does the community feel about him?
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E560 Antonio Brown
I respect he doesn't put himself out there. He doesn't try to do too much. No, he's a boss, man.
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E560 Antonio Brown
Yeah, and thank you for telling me. Give me the shout outs too. I didn't realize that they did, that they, yeah, at that point, after all of the things, man, a lot of people got on Trump's, a lot of convicts, inmates, people that had ever been accused of crimes a million times that didn't trust the justice system, they all got on his side.
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Yeah, because I guess as a football player, the path is kind of there. It's like you got to do this.
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I wish them pills would free him because he didn't seem like he'd been going through it.
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E560 Antonio Brown
Oh, he's a real business. A real business. No doubt. A real... But you, I think you, I think, yeah, you're right. You know, I'm definitely judging just off of video clips that I've seen and stuff like that.
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E560 Antonio Brown
No, I don't see the nappy hair and goals. That's not the part of the judgment. Some of it is some of his behaviors and mannerisms make me think.
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Just some of the like things where he's kind of fading in and out of consciousness.
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E560 Antonio Brown
He got it. Oh, he has like, it's almost like a... like a redesign of Bobby Schmert, like the, you know what I'm saying? A totally different, like.
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I didn't write him off. I'm not saying you wrote him off. Jump to conclusions. Jump to conclusions. I'm not saying you. I'm saying they. Yeah. I'm saying they. But I'm part of that. You're right. Jump into conclusions, right?
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E560 Antonio Brown
Well, it's so funny. I think that's one of the – I think when I was young, I did like – I could sometimes – I don't even know if this is racist to say, man, but I'm going to say it.
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Sometimes I would look at – sometimes I would see black people or other black kids and stuff, and I would be like – I don't know what their life was like, but I feel the same way they do. There's a little part of me that has the same feeling. Like, I just felt like the world hated me so much.
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Yeah, I don't know what it was. Just whatever it was, there was something inside of me that fucking was like. You felt like you were a different guy, bro.
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But sometimes there was this little part of me that felt like I could mildly.
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E560 Antonio Brown
Relay. Mildly. I'm not saying I don't know what it's like to be like somebody's life. And I'm not trying to keep interrupting. I just want to be clear. I'm not trying to. God, respect. I'm here with you. I know you. God, man. It's gang time. So the cracker today. It's just the gap between people loving each other.
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E560 Antonio Brown
But you got to watch people's intention, though, too. That's a huge thing.
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E560 Antonio Brown
Who does? Backwoods? How many's in there? They put five in there, huh? Yeah. Why, you think they shorten you? They always shorten us.
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E560 Antonio Brown
It is fun. It's fun. People send them all the time now. Look at that Cracker of the Day.
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And humor does it. Because we're all facing trauma. And humor does it the most because it's that one you're like, okay. I could get through that. I know what they mean. It's okay to connect these two things. It's okay. And it's funny. Exactly. Getting your sweat on might seem like hard work, but with Symmetry Sauna, it's a work of art.
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E560 Antonio Brown
Oh, damn. And what's in there? That reminds me of a poppy steak. They bring that steak out to you. You been there? Of course. That's where all the girls like to go. Poppy steak, huh? Yeah, they like that beef at Poppy's. Dang. That's when everybody comes running. You shake that. I like you shake that eight ball at a party. Bro, you have them coke ghosts.
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E560 Antonio Brown
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E560 Antonio Brown
And I'm finally sleeping like a baby, which is rare since I'm usually up at 3 a.m. wondering if penguins have knees. Pro athletes, fitness buffs, big folks getting small, small folks getting big. Everybody's hot boxing. And symmetry saunas can help. Designed in the USA, made with Aspen wood from ancient Estonian forests. Ooh. Yep, fancy trees.
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E560 Antonio Brown
Symmetry Sauna, the perfect balance of form and function. Learn more about how to get your own premium home sauna from Symmetry Sauna at symmetriesauna.com slash T-H-E-O. You all know I like to keep things cool. even in the winter. And nothing is cooler than a blue cube cold plunge. I'm fortunate enough to have one at home. And let me tell you, it's like baptizing your soul, baby.
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E560 Antonio Brown
Get in that little crispy bucket, baby. It gets rid of them demons we all have and makes you feel great for seven or eight hours afterwards. It's good. My buddy Thomas Schiffer, the genius behind Blue Cube, and I go way back, and he just launched a presale for their new stand-up cold plunges. Wow. These things are the Cadillacs of cold plunge therapy.
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E560 Antonio Brown
American-made, full immersion, weatherproof frames, and built like a Sherman tank. I'll say this, they are built well. And because you're listening to me, you can get a sweet discount when you mention my name. That's right. Just tell them Theo sent you and they'll knock a good bit off the price.
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E560 Antonio Brown
So if you're ready to boost your metabolism, eliminate inflation and blast away your anxiety, give them a call. Head over to their website, bluecubebaths.com, and dive into the details. Opt in on their website or give them a call. I am grateful for the one that I have, and I feel honestly thankful to be able to have one. I know they're not in everybody's price range, and that's understandable.
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E560 Antonio Brown
But at the same time, I want to support my friend and his amazing company. Now, someone said that the prize for the Cracker of the Year was...
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E560 Antonio Brown
was shane gillis right shane gillis was what cracker of the year he was the uh funniest cracker of the year funniest cracker of the year and i agree very funny man and the funniest cracker of the year i agree he got my vote now my question is there was said that there was a prize where whoever won it got to say the n-word one time is that true or not i heard that yes okay do you feel like everybody in their life have said the nigger the word you said it rapping the song
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E560 Antonio Brown
Like you my brother. If somebody says it to, if a black fella says that to me, I feel pretty good for that.
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E560 Antonio Brown
They show up like, ooh, they've been dead, but they hear the eight ball shaking. They be like, ooh.
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E560 Antonio Brown
I feel like, okay. You know what I'm saying? Let's do it. I want to buy some fucking J's, you know, I'm fucking ready to do this. But now, is there, why don't black people lease the N word out to be said like at a certain event or something? I think there could be a lot of money in that.
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E560 Antonio Brown
Oh, I agree. I don't mean use it in a derogatory way, but say like tonight they had like Angelina Jolie was paying 50 bands to say it right on a live stream. That'd be cool. And you sold tickets.
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E560 Antonio Brown
Oh, damn. Who are these people? You don't like that? Huh? I have no idea if I like it or not. But I just think like it's like. It's prerogative. Okay.
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E560 Antonio Brown
Oh, I didn't know they're doing all that. So I guess if somebody's fucking you, you can say it? That's crazy.
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E560 Antonio Brown
Dude, oh, there's poppy steak right there. That's where they pull up. Yeah, that's the movie steak. They grilling that meat right there.
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E560 Antonio Brown
Right, right. To feel... Yeah, when it goes against kind of what's normalcy, but I think it's... Yeah, obviously you want it out of like... people that are using it in like a derogatory way.
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E560 Antonio Brown
I used it one time. There was a black cat or whatever that was crossing my path or something. And I was furious.
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E560 Antonio Brown
I cannot, bro. I can't say it, dude. Why you can't say it? Bro, because it's not going to end well, I don't think.
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All right, AB. All right, perfect. Wow. Why did we say it, man? I can't be saying that kind of shit. That's what I'm saying, bro.
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But you can't be running. I can't be out at the mall or something saying it and I'm trying to stop somebody like, hey, here are the acronym. That's a thing. I don't want to say it anymore.
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E560 Antonio Brown
Yeah, but I just don't want to say it anymore, man. How about this? Let me think about this.
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It's not a bad thing, because guess what? In 50 years, people will look back and think that this is an important conversation, I think.
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E560 Antonio Brown
That's true. This is where we are. You're right. This is where we are.
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E560 Antonio Brown
He was at court, left court, only to try to be assassinated and had to go back to court. Right.
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He free, he free. Third wife. Third wife. Tall son. That's black stuff. Of course. He got baby moms. I don't hear about his child support. It's heavy, dude. But I'm saying this, though. You don't think, say, if Angelina Jolie was going to rattle off an N-word at 7.30 tonight, right? And the black community sold it on a live stream, right? People could log on and pay to watch it.
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E560 Antonio Brown
I just don't want to say it anymore. You got to feel like a man when you say this shit, bro.
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E560 Antonio Brown
putting me in position well it's funny because you really kind of came into this position like i got a text from rogan uh yesterday last night time middle of the night i don't know he like he's the human owl bro he's the fucking smart genius one of my one of the fucking crackers of the year he's beautiful was he i didn't know he was cracking man rogan won some shit he was nominated he won what do you mean he's i didn't know he won i thought you only gave one award yo we had a lot of awards you missed we had like 12 awards you did yeah
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Bro, I love what you're doing, though, because it's so- We reversing racism, man. I love our people.
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I got one of the chains. No, I love Kodak, man. I don't think there's anybody like him. But you're right. I jumped to conclusions and thought he was... Yeah. Oh, I think he reminds me of Lil Wayne in a way, bro.
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My mom had a good sense of humor. She was like, ha ha, love ya. She put it in there. The note was nice, but it still... Yeah, I would have preferred some proteins or something in there. But yeah, what you smoking? Backwoods? Yeah, I smoke backwoods. I got my nephew some good backwoods clothing for... Oh yeah, they do come out with some clothes. Christmas last year. Sweats and hoodies, right? Yes.
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What if a big dude borrow your shit and the next day you got to wear it again? Nothing, man.
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Maybe somebody will care about me if I look like this or something.
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E560 Antonio Brown
You know what? That's a good point. If Michael Jackson didn't look like he looked, do you think he would have been the same success of artists? Might be right. Might not have. You know? Who knows? Might not have. Not in a bad way or anything, but just no judgment. Just as a fact, he might not have. He was a black kid singing in groups. Yeah.
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E560 Antonio Brown
That's interesting, man. Yeah, man. They had. What was I thinking about? What were you just talking about?
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Did he smoke a lot of pot or not, Michael Jackson? Bring it up.
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Well, I heard he really liked women. That's what I've heard. He used to call women fish. Yeah, good fish. Bring her. Yeah.
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So you think they... That's the thing. How media can change so much the perception, but they can't do that as much anymore. Do you feel that?
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I will say that, man. That is one thing I felt like It was something where, yeah. Wow. You can say anything you want over here.
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He's a backwood guy? I think he's nine. I don't know if he is or not. You know, he's still pretty young. He's young. He's a Roblox guy.
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Maybe because I'm a thug. Right when I walk in, put on Trick Daddy, bro. Right away. Or I'll fucking stand on the porch, dog.
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You know what I'm saying? If you don't put on Trick Daddy, I ain't fucking coming in. It's a thug holiday. It's a thug holiday. All day, every day. Maybe because I'm a thug. R.I.P. Trick, man.
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E560 Antonio Brown
I don't know how many times we can say that on here, man. What is wrong with that? They'll stop us, bro. They don't want us communicating like this. You think they do? Who is they? Good question. We don't even know who's they. But they out there.
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But if they did a Roblox backwood collab, he'd be on it. That's him right there. Max in the middle.
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Yeah. Thanks, man. You know what? Because I think there's not a lot of times where it's like you feel with like if you're talking to a black person or a black guy where I feel like, can we try to just be completely real about what we're thinking or what our thoughts have been or what our real questions are? Exactly. All of that.
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E560 Antonio Brown
Dude, I remember the first time I ever, I was doing high school sports or something. I was lifting weights and a black friend of mine spotted me, right? He was spotting me. And that was the first time I remember a black guy I'd ever even touched a hat. A black guy hat? Touch my hand. Yeah. We never, we were spotting each other, but it was like, but I would just remember it.
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E560 Antonio Brown
I'd never say it was the same time when I went into the black doctors, like, Oh, I'd never, I just had never had like, would it like, okay, you know, let's do it.
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Yeah, he's pretty good. He got a good hairline on him. I know, Kid Swaggy. Yeah, I don't look at him too much. Where you from, Dale? You from New Orleans? I'm from outside of Louisiana. I'm outside of New Orleans. Trying to think if we had any pro athletes that came out of our area.
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Yeah. Because you can't have somebody talking to their friend and like, what are you doing tonight? And they're like, I'm going to this, you know, and they're just- No, I'm listening in, niggerism. Right, but you can't, if somebody hears that in a, it's just not going to end well for people, I think. It's going to be a lot.
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E560 Antonio Brown
I don't know, dude. No, I love the bridge in the culture part.
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E560 Antonio Brown
No, I've said it, I've sang it, I mean, in music. Of course.
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Yeah, there's been people who've said it, I know. Some people in our area used to write it and put it in a piece of paper, and then they would put it in a bottle, like a message in a bottle, and they'd throw it out in a river or somewhere, you know?
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E560 Antonio Brown
It's picking up speed. Oh, it's going to be beige. I say all the time, in three generations, everybody's going to be beige. It's going to be a mix. It's going to be a complete mix, man, especially at the rate that a lot of... There's a lot of... Every white family got some black dick in their family.
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E560 Antonio Brown
Oh, yeah. My, yeah. I mean, my cousin is definitely... That's what I mean.
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growing up for sure of course and if I was at home probably would still be kind of the same way exactly so it's like you grow up with that culture already but if we get out I don't know if we can be out there I mean what do you guys think Nick is that a realistic program to start or that sounds crazy I mean I think it could work why not well I disagree with you guys but why do you think Elon Musk bought the X app from Twitter not by saying the N word to give people the amendment back for freedom of speech
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E560 Antonio Brown
Like, even if you write them all, kick them to the right. Right. Even if you look at like Robert Kennedy Jr. Right. I don't care if you like Bobby Kennedy or not. He was a friend of mine before I knew that he was going to run for politics. We were friends. Right. I saw him as a as a reliable, honest friend. Yeah.
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E560 Antonio Brown
And then he started running for politics and he was talking about the vaccine and shit. And people said, he's fucking crazy. Right. I mean, people, people that knew him, people that mutual friends, like he's crazy. And then he made it all. He made it past. I'm crazy to getting half of the people to believe him. You know, well, that's a part of it. But that's how everybody's done that.
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E560 Antonio Brown
Like everybody who ever said anything that was important started off. It was unimportant. It was not considered a value. It was uncomfortable. It was uncomfortable. That's what I'm saying.
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Look what it say the network is. Put the network on him. In 2025, Ye's net worth staying at $2.77 billion. Yes. As confirmed by Etan Venture Services, based on his music portfolio and his sole ownership of the- Yo, Kanye West, the only black guy ever give me $2 million.
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E560 Antonio Brown
Somebody said you're not a real black father until you've had three kids. Is that true or not? Like in the black community, that's what I heard.
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E560 Antonio Brown
They called him. They wrote him off. They did him just like they did your friend. The media cooked him.
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E560 Antonio Brown
Put us on the grill, bitch. Let's see. Let's cook. Let's see what happens when things heat up.
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E560 Antonio Brown
Let's see what happens when things heat up. Exactly.
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Since then, he found himself in multiple endeavors, like his prestigious Cracker of the Day Awards, where he gives out awards to whites and honkeys and others. I had a good time getting to know him. He is very unique. Today's guest is the C-T-E-S-P-N bad boy, Mr. Antonio Brown.
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E560 Antonio Brown
When I see you, like I have black friends now that have like, and their households are way different than the households of my friends that were black when I was a kid, you know? It's a different.
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E560 Antonio Brown
It's like, oh wow, it's like more of like, yeah, it's crazy.
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Public news, shame. And that bronze, I'm surprised he didn't go full dark on that bronze one day and just pull up.
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E560 Antonio Brown
Well, he went to China, but maybe he just didn't like being there better.
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E560 Antonio Brown
Yeah. At a certain point, I wouldn't want to deal with it. Especially at a certain point, the media. I wouldn't be happy. The media, every time you turn around, it's almost like they're trying to make you crazy.
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E560 Antonio Brown
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E560 Antonio Brown
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E560 Antonio Brown
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E560 Antonio Brown
Bring him up. I want to see a picture of him, man. Touchdown, Eddie Brown. Pull up the Louisiana Tech. There you go right there. Pull up Eddie, bro. If you need him, he's in the end zone. That's where you're going to have to pull him up, bro. Yeah, they call him Touchdown.
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E560 Antonio Brown
It's kind of wild when you see guys that leave a team to go to a team that doesn't have a great quarterback just for the money. But I guess that's part of it, huh?
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E560 Antonio Brown
I know. I hear the term all the time. What is it? Bring it up. You never had no BBL? I don't know if I have or not. I want to see what it is. Brazilian butt lift. Oh, okay. And they go to Brazil to get it?
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E560 Antonio Brown
That's Brazilian, huh? That's wild. That's a new ass. You got to get your bitch a new ass when it been hit. Oh, God. That's crazy. I'll get her an SUV maybe if we're married or whatever. But what about the, whoa, whoa, what's this thing going on? That's funnel cake. That's that funnel cake.
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E560 Antonio Brown
God, bro, that's a Birmingham butt lift. She got that bitch done in fucking Central Alabama. That thing fucking lopsided, bro. Dang.
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E560 Antonio Brown
What you, you know, what you arrange and how you want to open your hips. I don't know. I don't want any, I don't want to, some women, it's like, if it's too much, it kind of, like, I don't want to fuck something that's fucking back, you know? You don't want the jello? I mean, I don't know if I can handle it, man. I mean, I might swerve hit that cone, you know what I'm saying, bro? Oh, shit. Whoa.
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E560 Antonio Brown
What do you think about that new Jello song? You think you like that? You know what, man? At first, I was like, the bar, like, the main bar is good. But then I was like, I don't know. But then I was listening to it yesterday a couple extra times, and I did. I felt like... You got one? Yeah, I was... It's just like, I think it's... Yeah, I liked it. You got one? I liked it.
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E560 Antonio Brown
It sounds like an old 90s song, right? It does a little bit. And it makes you feel like anybody could like it. Almost like somebody from 15 to 50.
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E560 Antonio Brown
It is cool, man. And I really like his brother played in for the Pelicans for a while. Yeah, his brother's ballers, man.
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E560 Antonio Brown
It is cool to see three brothers get to do something together. That's exciting, you know? And they had Zion Williamson down there. Yeah, that kid got bungees. Yeah, that guy, they're so exciting to play. But now that Zion's in, how are they in their last 10 games, Pelicans? Look at their last 10 games, man.
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E560 Antonio Brown
He got to take care of himself, too. I think so. But then also, you know what? I'm just judging.
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E560 Antonio Brown
That's a good point. So it's like... How do you make it all work?
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E560 Antonio Brown
You're right. I think I'm just a little angry at him as a fan.
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E560 Antonio Brown
We got to build him up. What about when Le'Veon left? Was that weird when he left Pittsburgh? Man, I took the heart out of the soul of the team. Le'Veon, one of my close friends, is like, man. Why was his energy? He was like the team. People loved him, huh?
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E560 Antonio Brown
They more out of Tulane, wasn't he? Yeah, Tulane, right from New Orleans. Come on, let's go.
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What do you think, TV? I'm trying to think where we could. Because you would be considered an export at that point. Yes. So that's a trade agreement we'd have to get with another continent, I would guess. I'm trying to think of who we could get for you. Who could we get on the international market? That's a good question. That's what I'm saying. Who could we do it? How could we do it?
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E560 Antonio Brown
A lot of history over there. Jerry Olshansky, he was an offensive lineman.
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E560 Antonio Brown
Just if we had the courage to fucking go get Le'Veon, bro. But what about, do you think agents sometimes ruin the possibility for there to be a- I feel like,
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E560 Antonio Brown
Hell yeah. Dude, I saw, bro, you had the tweet the other day. It was so good. He looked like Darlene from fucking Roseanne, bro. That shit was...
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E560 Antonio Brown
Yeah, sometimes. But this is so true. Remember when Mahomes played Darlene on Roseanne?
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E560 Antonio Brown
Do you just, does somebody, do you also have somebody else writing stuff for you or it's just you?
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E560 Antonio Brown
Oh, that I met here? Yeah, Jacob. It's me and him coming out here.
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E560 Antonio Brown
Yeah, he's fucking a savage. He's a savage. That's savvy, dude. Yeah. Are there some players that you're still tight with? And is there a player? Of course.
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E560 Antonio Brown
Yeah, what's the exchange rate on the NASDIC? You know, what's the exchange rate on the AB if we put you out there?
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E560 Antonio Brown
Do you think Belichick is as good without Brady? In the end, it's all just a matter of pieces.
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E560 Antonio Brown
Right, something inside of him or inside of his father or grandparent in his DNA.
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some shit you never see again you know even him as an analyst I'm loving him as an analyst because he gives you different he gives you different insights that you never would have heard he said the other day in one of the games he said that oh I usually looked at how far I had to get and I averaged it usually about a second per yard he said when he was like when the clock was really low or something whatever I'm fucking that up that's like Drew Brees is the same way
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E560 Antonio Brown
It's like, yo, let's go out and fucking do it. Towards it. Describe some of these worst teams. I'm going to give you a name of a team. Just give me a word or two to describe them. Ravens. Aggressive. Browns.
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E560 Antonio Brown
He was the fucking. They are. Yeah. Jamar being chased. That's for sure.
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E560 Antonio Brown
What's a little bit of news that's going on, man? You got any news stories?
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E560 Antonio Brown
He's going to release the file. Yeah, we talked about that. But see, I believe that that's – here's what I believe in that. I believe the CIA or the FBI or whatever has gone through, probably marked stuff in there to make MLK look bad, right? Of course they changed the name. They want to bring him down.
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E560 Antonio Brown
Because here's what happens is, first they give you leaders, then they start to release information that brings those leaders down. And when they do that, they kill a culture. They're killing a culture, right? Of course. So now all the people that had him as a role model, and he may have had a different- A high-level guy. And a high-level guy.
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E560 Antonio Brown
Yeah, I think I would like to cover it most of the time just because I know that I have the ability to cover it without having to worry about it as much maybe, you know, the next day or week, you know. But sometimes, yeah.
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E560 Antonio Brown
He may have had a unique life that was filled with different things, but it didn't make him maybe a bad guy.
This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von
E560 Antonio Brown
And white culture, too, man. It happens now for white culture, too.
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E560 Antonio Brown
Just mostly for the blacks, the black superheroes. Oh, yeah. I mean, it's definitely happened more to blacks. But now you're seeing where they're going and taking down like they're really the media can go and take black leaders down. Right.
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E560 Antonio Brown
Ooh, damn. Let's pull that up, man. A pig organ? They got a pig organ they put in somebody. Wow. The only person in the world with a functioning- Black person?
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E560 Antonio Brown
Ooh, damn. Is it? An Alabama woman passed a major milestone Saturday to become the longest living recipient of a pig organ transplant. Healthy and full of energy with her new kidney. 61 days and counting, man. That's kind of messed up, man. I feel like hiding a piece of... Hiding pork inside of a black person seems fucked up, bro. Is that crazy to say? That's bad, bro.
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E560 Antonio Brown
Oh, but a lot of people love bacon. You can't put a piece of fucking bacon inside of somebody's body. Why the fuck would she get that? That's all they had? That's a good point, man. See, that's the kind of shit that black people been going through. Like, hey, we ain't got a regular heart.
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E560 Antonio Brown
Yeah, at least. That's wild. Yeah, even if a... What's the source of you living? Like, the pig organ. Even give her one with the beats off a little bit. That's fine. You know, put that remix in her. But don't give her a pig heart. Scientists are genetically altering pigs so their organs are more human-like to address a severe shortage of transplantable human organs. Well, that's interesting.
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E560 Antonio Brown
What else, man? What else have we covered? I'm trying to think of things that I wanted to cover today, man.
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E560 Antonio Brown
I feel like a cow, but I feel like I'm my own shepherd at the same time.
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E560 Antonio Brown
That's Tiger King. Y'all mess with him, this guy? Remember him? Oh, shit. They trying to take Tiger King out. They trying to get him in jail, but he in there slurping for sure, bro. He been in there. But yeah, that's one thing I think is if they, I don't know what else I think, man. My brain's tired. Yours get tired sometimes?
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E560 Antonio Brown
Yeah, I can't. Black people are so much better at getting high, I think, man.
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E560 Antonio Brown
Fuck, dude, I got high. I couldn't fucking walk four or five feet without making sure everybody's okay. But obviously, black guys will play a whole basketball game on being high.
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E560 Antonio Brown
Bro, I can't take any more medical advice. I can't take any more suggestions from you today, bro. You're going to have me with a sore dick yelling the N-word out on the interstate. We're going viral. Yeah, we're going viral. It's a black party, bro. Oh, man. I appreciate you coming, AB, man.
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E560 Antonio Brown
Yeah. Yeah, I'm intrigued. What do you kind of see, like, what things you want to do in the coming future? Because it's like... I feel like at first people thought you was kind of crazy. And then now people are like thinking, well, well, you know what? That's all judgment. What do you want to do? What are some things you like? Like, do you feel like you want to achieve?
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E560 Antonio Brown
What's one of your biggest regrets you've had over the years, if you have one?
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E560 Antonio Brown
What makes me kind of uncomfortable? Yeah, sometimes if people are recording you for no reason, that's weird. But that's weird.
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E560 Antonio Brown
And why he went to black culture to feel comfortable too. Because I think that's an interesting thing.
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E560 Antonio Brown
And if they had like a thing, say if like, you know, tonight, bro, right? 9.30 p.m. Macaulay Culkin is doing an N-word, bro.
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E560 Antonio Brown
From Home Alone. You telling me how many people would pay to stream that?
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E560 Antonio Brown
We're going to get a lot of hate for even thinking about that, I think.
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E560 Antonio Brown
Right. You got, you're right. You have to be comfortable.
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E560 Antonio Brown
and building that up and see what the future that's like in the universe you know exactly i mean i'm just a wit i'm just a bystander and and all of that um but yeah i think that would be that would be really interesting to see uh if that was a way to raise some money but that also might be really crazy and i think we're talking to the x out right now we was thinking maybe like the cracker olympics but there was like we maybe could maybe call it the abc olympics
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E560 Antonio Brown
Dude, I saw one one time. It was me just walking somewhere, dude. And I'm not the best walker or whatever, you know? How you walk?
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E560 Antonio Brown
Dude, a lot of good crackers ain't getting it. You want to be... Everybody likes a little bit of shine, you know?
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E560 Antonio Brown
Yeah, all plants, bro. Everybody's working hard towards something, man. All plants, bro. We look at the sun, man. Which we got, yeah, we got another, anything else you want to talk about?
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E560 Antonio Brown
I do just mutual, but I'm a safe bro. I get scared about my money. Oh wait, I did get like one... Probably 160th of a Bitcoin or something. 140th of a Bitcoin. How much is that? I think maybe $3,500. I got a little put away. Might be $4,000.
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E560 Antonio Brown
So check out the Elon Trump fart coin. And what is that? It's a coin that's out on... It's one of the best coins that's out on crypto. Oh, really?
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E560 Antonio Brown
Let's see that. Elon Trump fart 500. Pull that up. Elon Trump fart 500.
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E560 Antonio Brown
I should, but do it a long day. That's just 24 hours. Give me a month.
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E560 Antonio Brown
No, that's all right, man. I don't think we need it. All right. Let's don't bridge the gap that much, bro.
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E560 Antonio Brown
etf uh etf 500. okay trump fart 500 coin crypto is going up gang game you trade a lot i trade a lot man i try to get into it it's a lot of money in a digital aspect yeah oh no i agree it's a huge part of the culture now too yeah it's uh we've all it's all different things that happen in financial cultures i'm curious to see uh what the whole future of crypto in that whole world looks like meme coins and everything it's interesting
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E560 Antonio Brown
Eyes up. Yeah. You on your toes or your heels? I'm right in the middle, baby. You know what I'm saying? I'm that middle dog. You won't catch me on a front or the back, though. Like that. Just somewhere in the middle. I'll see you at the 50-yard line. That's where I'm at, bro. Right between the legs. Yeah. Right in the middle. Yeah. I'm that fulcrum, baby.
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E560 Antonio Brown
A.B., thank you, man. I really appreciate your time. My honor, man. Thanks for having a conversation, chatting with me. And for just all the tweeting and stuff. It's a lot of entertainment. So thank you for that. It takes a lot of time to do that. People don't think about that. It's a lot of time. So thank you for the commitment. And best of luck to you, man. Thank you, brother. Yeah. Yeah, yeah.
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E560 Antonio Brown
I'm just cause you don't know if the Lord's get me or the devil's get me. I'm right there. I'm on that tight rope. That's how I walk. I like that. I'm on that fucking tight rope, boy. You don't know if I'm fucking, you don't know what I'm doing. I like that. But yeah, I like to be, um, I walk, let me see. Yeah. I kind of push my like forward. I move like I'm moving forward. Like a demon. Wow.
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E560 Antonio Brown
Yeah. Oh, like a pretty nice demon though. Yeah. Like that nice ass. Superhero vibes. Like that nice ass demon. Yeah, but sometimes, yeah, I saw a video one time and it was like, damn, this dude ugly, bro. That was a fucking video. That was the caption. They was hating on you?
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E560 Antonio Brown
Ugly ass. Look at these pieces of shit. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's a good attitude, man. You're right. I am ugly, motherfucker.
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E560 Antonio Brown
It's like a mix. Louisiana is a mix of like... Country, city. It's a mix of country, light city.
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E560 Antonio Brown
Yeah, people on it? Oh, I didn't see them, but I believe you. They got a lot of lurkers around here.
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E560 Antonio Brown
Put it on. These motherfuckers watching Mythbusters on this bitch. Put something on, man. Put it on, Jack. John Doe right there. Death penalty case of John Doe gang leader in peril as judge disqualified.