The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
The Big Suey: Tall, Dark, and Handsome (feat. Domonique Foxworth)
Wed, 05 Feb 2025
Domonique Foxworth joins the show and begins with a motivational speech to Chris Cote before explaining why he asks for permission to "take it back to the 90s." Domonique chats with the crew about talking his way into parties, Amin's child's first flagrant foul, Charlie Kravitz's Dan impression and his experience with Jayden Daniels, and he leaves by imparting some advice. Then, have you ever been such a fan of someone that you've told them they changed your life? Plus, Turkey Vultures and breaking NBA Trade Deadline news. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
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Hey folks, it's Mike Ryan and I need to talk to you about something that I use religiously. Anytime I'm hosting a big dinner party, I want to impress people and I get food from some of the most iconic, famous places in the country. You know what helps me do that? Goldbelly. This amazing site where I order from all the time.
where you can get all these amazing foods from all across our great country. They will ship free to your door anywhere in the U.S. of A. Gold Belly will ship you Philly cheesesteaks from Jim's or Pat's in Philly. I'm treating my office right now to a cheesesteak party from Pat's, courtesy of Gold Belly. And on top of that, I threw in some original buffalo wings from Anchor Bar in Buffalo.
You can get Kansas City's most legendary barbecue from Gold Belly. And if the pizza near you sucks, they will ship you New York style pizza from John's on Bleecker or Chicago deep dish pizza from Lou Malnati's. I do that all the time. Or even New Haven or Detroit style pizza. If you are truly gluttonous, though.
They will ship you Guy Fieri's famous trash can nachos, which I kid you not, are the ultimate game day centerpiece. So if you're looking to host an epic Super Bowl party, or any party for that matter, go to goldbelly.com and get free shipping and 20% off your first order with promo code DAN. That's goldbelly.com, code DAN, for free shipping and 20% off your first order.
Welcome to the Big Sui, presented by DraftKings. Why are you listening to this show? The podcast that seems very similar to the other Dan Lebitard podcast. I'm sorry, I'm not going to apologize for that. In fact, the only difference seems to be this imaging. I have been tempted in restaurants just walking past tables to grab somebody's fries if they're just there. That hasn't happened to you guys?
I've done it. And now, here's the marching man to nowhere, fat face, and the habitual liar.
I wish everybody could hear the motivational speech Dominique just gave Chris Cody.
It wasn't really motivational. It was, you're awesome, dude. He was just praising me. Why'd you turn into...
I shouldn't be talking. I haven't been introduced yet. My bad. I'll be quiet.
Oh, I am. I am summoning Dominique Foxworth, not just because we just replayed the video from last summer of David Sampson koala bearing him mid-dap, but also because Chris Cody clearly was waiting for that external validation. You guys talked about sack grabbing in a way that felt honestly inspirational. Yeah.
I need a new I feel like we need a new idiom for that, like a more modern one. Sometimes with my friends, this is a secret that I'm going to tell you guys. Some of my friends, I ask for permission to take us back to the nineties, like in a group chat before I say something. I'm like permission to go back to the nineties. They grant the permission.
I text my group chat something that I would not say publicly, but I don't know the words for it right now. And then we return to 2024 or 2025 now. But I just realized with Chris, when I when I talk to him, I've been noticing like I listen to the show, I've been noticing that Chris's feels like he's become a little bit more forceful.
And he's rolling his shoulders right now listening to compliment him.
Yeah. And so, like, I came on and I was like, Chris, Proud of you, man. You seem like you grabbed your sack lately, which I realized, like, that's a bad thing to say because I see Jess in the back row, and, like, I feel the same way about Jess, but I can't tell her.
And then it's just like... Carmen can't be brave. They have no balls.
I know. Like, it's outdated. Like, there has to be some better idiom for, like, asserting yourself.
Intestinal fortitude, sir, is what you're looking for. How about great job? You're improving.
no see that see that's generic doesn't seem that's not what he needs that's not specific like i i appreciate that you have a lot a lot of managerial experience but i do feel like some of the interpersonal things about management you just missed the mark because it's like saying you're doing a great job Like, it does not feel genuine.
It's like saying somebody, you look nice, as opposed to, man, I really appreciate the way you've grown in your beard. Like, the salt and pepper looks really distinguished.
We show it through salary, Dominique. We show it through salary, through title. You don't need to show it through sack grab.
Go on. Dominique, you should know that David tried to high-five me when I wasn't trying to high-five him.
Let's put that up for Dominique to see if we can.
Yeah, just so Dominique can be brought in, caught up on the show as we do substitute teacher week here. Oh, gosh. Look, I'm not trying to high five you. I'm just gesturing in your direction. The other reason I wanted to bring Dominique in beyond establishing the rules of consensual 90s mode. which I like.
We like to call it the 20CB on Cinepho. The 20CB. The 20CB. Whenever you go back into the 90s or the 80s or earlier than that, you're going back to the 20CB as opposed to when we're now, we're in the 21st century, man.
But you announce it to your group text when you're doing that, the way Dominique does?
We often will ask. Sometimes it won't be something that's offensive. Sometimes it'll be a saying. Or something that happens. Is this 20CB? And then we get a confirmation from the group text. Yes, this is in fact a 20CB occurrence.
Dominique, does anyone say no when you ask them to go back?
Of course not. So then why ask? Because it's a joke. Man, you would like. All right. I feel like I start back over with you every time I see you. I start back over with teaching you how to be a goddamn human being. It's like we've got to start at square one. I would like you to carry over some of the things that I've taught you in the past. Like last time we made so much damn progress.
We really loved you. I loved you. It was like, this is good. And then we get back on here and you're telling me I just throw money at people. That shows them that I like them. That doesn't work. And then you're like, do you do they decline? No. The point is, it's funny.
It's like, hey, can I go back to, like, when someone says something that's, like, a little bit sensitive, like, can I go back to the 90s? Then you call them a slur that you would have used in the 90s that wouldn't have been considered a slur back then. And then you come back. Like, and then we all laugh together. It's like, why do I have to explain this to you?
So, Dominic, I got some things here that are not quite as offensive that are decidedly 20 CB.
Do we need some fanfare here?
Sure, these aren't top five. These are just five examples, but give me some fanfare. Number five, eat your heart out. Nobody says that anymore. That is a relic of the 20th century. Our hearts remain uneaten. Eat your heart out. No one says that anymore. Framing the first dollar a small business makes.
I would still do that if I started a business.
I thought that was like an immigrant thing. It's a dry cleaner thing. Always a dry cleaner, right? They just put it up where you can see it. Restaurants do it, too. Do they? It's in the kitchen.
Describing someone as tall, dark, and handsome.
These are all SpongeBob bits, by the way.
It took me a long time to realize that they weren't talking about black people when they said tall, dark, and handsome. I was like, yeah. And then I was like, oh, wait, that guy's not dark. Wait, they aren't? No. Jinx, Dominic. Letting people know that Napoleon always had his hand in his pocket. When I was a kid.
The kids today appreciate that he had it tucked right there.
Cartoons, movies, TV shows. Always, if you mention Napoleon, the first thing you mention was his hand was in his pocket like that. Don't even say, my kids have no idea what that is. Right? Like they know who Napoleon is. They have no idea. We used to be a proper empire. And then finally. We are again now, it seems. We are. Dicey. And then finally, hot water bottles. Why are those 90s?
You don't see them. We have heating pads now. Heating pads. Those clay things they put in the microwave, you heat up. The electric ones. No one uses a hot water bottle anymore. Again, now, if you grew up like we did, Looney Tunes, anytime someone was sick, there was a hot water bottle somewhere, right? But these kids don't watch Looney Tunes, so they don't know what hot water bottles are.
Looney Tunes is how I learn most cultural references.
Absolutely. I had no idea hot water balls were a thing. You know another thing that's very 90s? Sometimes people's shorts are a little 90s. And then they update those shorts and they get these new age. Look at those shorts! That material, that is future material. Chris Cody is no longer rocking 90s ass shorts. It's like a decades old callback, David Sampson. Sorry, that wasn't for you.
No, that's one of the great brands. We got to see if they can send us some clothes for a sponsorship. I'd like to get on that. Wait, so Chris Cody wears the same shorts as David Sampson? They are the most comfortable clothes possible. Am I the only one?
No, I don't wear their men's shorts, but I wear several pairs of leggings.
Do they come with pickpocket protection? Yep, zippers. They're zippers, but it's not great because the zippers actually, in the flying pants that I have, the zipper is more of a vertical zipper, and it's a little tight to get as much in the pockets. I'm a big pocket guy.
Let me ask this question. Flying pants. Aren't the Viore shorts the ones that were in the Dolphins training camp video?
I have multiple colors. Yeah, I had the black Viore shorts for the two-way interview. Are we still proud of this brand now after someone? It's not the shorts. That was just on me. Way too much thigh in that picture. Okay.
Disagree.
Dominic, are you excited to go to New Orleans? Because you're not there and there's a lot going on there. All of Metal Ark is there. They're having the time of their lives. And when we asked you to be on the show, we thought you were already part of what's going on and you haven't even left yet.
No, well, it's interesting you say all of Metal Ark is there when I'm looking at like a whole bunch of Metal Ark in the studio right there.
Looking at some tall, dark, and handsome.
The holdovers. No, there's only one. The rest of you guys, not quite dark enough. Give me a couple more days. Yeah, I mean, I'm excited. It's fun. It's cool. It'll be a good time. New Orleans is good food. I mean, the best thing about the Super Bowl is normally the random occurrences that you can't plan for.
And so my co-host of my show, Charlie Kravitz, has been like sending me all these reservations and plans and talking about what parties are going to go to. And it's just not how you do Super Bowl. That's not how you do Super Bowl.
You show up, you talk your way into parties, you bounce around, you bump into old friends and have random celebrity meetups, and then you talk about it later on the flight back.
Have you been asked to go on God Bless Football yet with Stu Gatz? No, no, no, no, no, no. Well, we got to change that. I mean, apparently, God bless football. The number one football podcast in America. Award winning, as you know, Dominique.
Guys, get that off the screen.
Oh, hold on. We're back on Chris's shorts.
God, that whole look, Chris. This is angle. Get just get this. It's a really unfair. Lewis is about to get fired.
The drawstring is my favorite part. He just the whole time.
All right. That's it. No more zooming. Cut away.
Pan down a little bit more. Thank you, guys. Enhance.
That's my worst nightmare.
Dominic, you like the politicking outside of the Super Bowl party? You enjoy that part?
um no i enjoy it now i didn't used to enjoy it so like talking your way into a party was a thing that would give would make me anxious in the past but now like i mean what's your greatest talk your way into the before you had the notoriety of being on massive television platforms what was the your magnum opus of talking your way into something I mean, it's, it's, it's lying mostly is like.
You don't have a specific, cause I have a specific example.
Oh, get to it.
Get to it.
Do you have a specific lie?
Oh, it wasn't, it wasn't like an example of a party that I got into that I shouldn't have got into. Walked up. And this is at the point where I'm at my pinnacle. Sports Nation is happening. The Jump is happening. I'm like, I'm out here, right? And so this is, we go up to the- I mean, you're still out here, just for the record. Well, I'm not. No, now I'm mature. I'm wiser.
I'm like, Dominique, I just- You showed up an hour late for the show today. I mean, because I stepped off a plane. Doesn't matter. That's a flex.
Should have talked your way into an earlier plane.
I wish. So I walk in and I walk up to security. And as I'm looking, I said, I know what the deal is. Because most of these bouncers, they're all Laker fans. And so I just got to find the one Laker fan who looks at me and asks me why am I hating on the Lakers. So I see my guy, and I'm like, yeah. And he says, why are you always hating on the Lakers? I'm like, oh, come on, man.
You know, da-da-da-da. This is when the Lakers are terrible. So as I'm talking, his manager comes up. His manager is your typical Vegas manager, right? Nightclub manager. Short Italian guy, lots of product in his hair, vest.
Hold on. I think we have to enter consensual 90s mode before we do that.
Want to see me? And he's got the earpiece, right? The earpiece. And he comes up, sorry, boss, I can't let you in. I'm sorry. And I'm like, oh, come on, man. That's all I got to do. Come on, man. And he's like, I'm sorry. Even if I let you in here, see that guy over there? And there's a bald dude at a podium. He's like, that guy's my manager. He's not going to let you in.
So I'm like, ah, there's nothing we can do. And the guy I'd been talking to, and this is my rule, bouncers, bartenders, you get 15 minutes of show. I'll ask any question. I'll give him a show. So I gave that guy 15 minutes of show. He pulls his manager aside and just points back at me. And the guy unclips the velvet robe, walk in. My buddy's like, what's going on? I just listen.
We walk up to the guy at the podium, the manager who would have said no. And he looks up. He says, why are you always hitting on the Lakers? I was like, ah, come on, man. I gave him like five, 10 minutes of show. We're in the party. My buddy was like, that was amazing. How did you do that?
Why don't you try a C note next time?
Oh, no. I'm not going to. That's the rule, David. I don't pace.
Money. It's just money with this guy. I just don't want to do 15 minutes of show.
Oh, I don't mind doing 15 minutes of show. It's about the challenge. For a bouncer or a bartender, I'll give them 15 minutes of show. No problem. It's the other normies that I have a problem with. That's right. You see me in the streets. You say hello. You get a picture. Keep it moving.
You won't even give someone one minute of show unless they can do something for you?
I'll give them a question. We know Amin's policy. Amin will do pro bono Sports Nation for any bouncer or security guard. But if you're an Uber driver who asks Amin, what do you do? Amin is lying his ass off immediately.
I work for Marriott. Guest experiences. I travel from property to property to make sure that we have consistency across all the brands. Do you flash your chipped tooth when you do that? Well, I haven't had to do it since I chipped my tooth.
All right, David. I'm just asking. It's important.
We talked to Dominique. I miss Dominique.
Can I bring Dominique back in? Because Amin said something else, Dominique, that made me glad that you were here and available before you get on your flight to New Orleans, which is that Amin was just in Arizona, and he had witnessed a special sporting milestone.
My child had a flagrant foul, the very first flagrant foul. Ooh, nice. Hopefully a long career. And it happened with five seconds left in the game, and the other team was just dribbling the ball out. Oh, gosh. And so you were very proud, I assume. No, because, you know, first of all, it was a road game. So I got to demonstrate to the crowd that I don't condone this behavior. And I just said, why?
I just kept saying, why? Why? Like Nancy Kerrigan. Why? Why?
The guy who used to co-host Sports Nation is despondent right now. What's happening?
Did you start doing show? I started doing show for all the people around me, yeah. But Dominique, do you remember your first unsportsmanlike conduct?
I remember celebrating when my oldest daughter first started getting fouls in basketball, but especially for, and I don't think we need to go back to the 90s for this, but like being a parent of two girls and a boy, like watching the way girls' sports are played and the way that their refs and coach, kind of frustrated me because they're encouraging boys in such different ways.
So I remember like when my oldest daughter was eight years old and she busted another girl's lip because she was trying like she was trying to get a rebound. I remember celebrating her and then taking her home to watch Charles Oakley videos like the difference, the difference in that in that age of of sports for boys and girls. A lot of times the difference is like
just want to like fight and try hard. It was like, yeah. And they get, so they respond to, the way everyone else acts. And when there's a foul in the boys' games, it's a lot different when there was a foul in the girls' games. And I just was trying to encourage them to be a little bit more aggressive and feisty. So I did not yell why. I stood up and started clapping, like, she all right?
All right. She all right? Good. Let's keep playing. You get a little lip bust. And it was probably good for her, too. Like, my daughter's got elbowed in the eye last week. You know what she did? She got up. She kept balling, and I was very proud of that.
Look, we're down like by a bajillion points. There was five seconds to go. It had all the wrong options.
What do you mean? Be a better defense attorney for your kid.
No!
No, man, I can't.
Dominique just gave you a thoughtful way to spin this, and you're like... I'm doubling down, because Dominique, if it was in the middle of a game, doing a basketball activity, I would be like, yeah, no problem. This was literally, the kid is dribbling the ball out, and my child just stares and says...
f this just trucks from behind or like head on head on and the kid was feet above the head on the ground tom and jerry when i played soccer i just sometimes you just gotta like get a little foul out you know just like ah and then looked at me and shrugged like what what i do i said why what i do i'm like what are you doing
You said it was a road game. It was a road game. And all the home crowd knew that you were the parent of this player? Yeah, because I'd been talking the whole time.
Oh, you're that parent? I talked to my kid the entire time.
I'm terrible. All right, we've got to establish some etiquette, Dominique. What are your sports parent commandments when it comes to talking? Well, I mean...
I have unique experience. So, like, I never say – I coach my son's football team, so that's very different. But, like, through my whole sports parenting career, I just am very quiet and I don't react to anything other than just, like, clap. I don't, like, cheer for individuals on the team. Like, it's just my sports parent rules. I don't begrudge anyone who does that.
But generally, like, I don't know. You ever, like, turn away?
Do you give, like, the aggressive, like, fist pump, but, like, you want to be subtle with it?
It's normally just a clap, like, okay, okay, okay, no matter how intense the game is. And we got – my wife is a little bit different, even though she's not an athlete and she's not very much into sports, but she is very much into the kids' sports. And so we've had a couple near altercations where I had to stand up and be like –
look, this is not what we're going to do to, like, some opposing parents. Like, this is not what we're going to do. This is 12-year-old girl soccer. Relax. And then normally people respond accordingly, but, yeah, that's... I don't know. That's the worst possible thing is I don't want to be in a situation. And maybe this is just me being like self-conscious.
It's like I assume that people are looking at me. I don't want people to leave and be like, man, Dominique was real tough on his kid. Or that Foxworth guy was trying to fight the whole opposing fans and yelling at the refs. It's like when you go from watching Patrick Mahomes play, it feels kind of insane for this like guy on his second job reffing a game for me to start yelling at him.
Like, get it together. Guy's doing the best he can.
I pray for footage of you guys flipping out at a game. I just want someone to send me a TikTok of you guys.
It won't happen because mine isn't the kind that he's describing. I don't talk to the refs. I don't talk to the coaches. I don't talk to other parents. I don't talk to any other kids. I'm just telling my kid, cut, cut now, cut now.
Are you ever undermining a play that's been drawn up? No.
No, because I know the place.
You know the place.
I know what you're doing, though. You're taking shots by talking to your kid. You're taking shots at the opposing team. Like, come on. You can beat them off the dribble. You can beat them off the dribble.
I thought Dominique was saying Amin is taking shots literally vicariously. As in, like, shoot. Coach, you've got to isolate number nine on defense.
We need to isolate number nine. They can't guard anyone.
I don't do that. I don't tell my kid when to shoot. I do say cut and things like that. I do know the plays because when my kid comes home and says, hey, we got a new play. We have a whiteboard. I said, draw it up for me. And then you've got to tell me from every position. If you're playing the two. All right. Now, if you're playing the five, where are you? Where are you doing?
So it's just things that we do. We watch film together. Film of what? It's high school, so all the games are on film. So after the game, we come home and we watch film. Oh, it's high school. I don't know.
I thought it was younger for some reason. I was picturing 10 to 12, you.
My kids are freshmen in high school playing varsity. So there's a big crowd.
Oh, this changes everything. Did you guys all catch that? We were not. Did we all catch that? Earl Woods over here is revealing what's really happening. I stand corrected. Amin is engineering the next grade athlete. Not really.
We're more about grades in my house. But my thing is. That's what you got to say.
That's what you got to say, Amin. Well done. Well done. A good immigrant parent.
If you're going to do this, we're going to do this right, too.
Framing dollar bills and talking about grades.
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The Venmo MasterCard is issued by the Bancorp Bank N.A. Pursuant to license by MasterCard International Incorporated. Dosh cash back terms apply.
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Hey folks, it's Mike Ryan and I need to talk to you about something that I use religiously. Anytime I'm hosting a big dinner party, I want to impress people and I get food from some of the most iconic, famous places in the country. You know what helps me do that? Goldbelly. This amazing site where I order from all the time.
where you can get all these amazing foods from all across our great country. They will ship free to your door anywhere in the U.S. of A. Gold Belly will ship you Philly cheesesteaks from Jim's or Pat's in Philly. I'm treating my office right now to a cheesesteak party from Pat's, courtesy of Gold Belly. And on top of that, I threw in some original buffalo wings from Anchor Bar in Buffalo.
You can get Kansas City's most legendary barbecue from Gold Belly. And if the pizza near you sucks, they will ship you New York-style pizza from John's on Bleecker or Chicago deep dish pizza from Lou Malnati's. I do that all the time. Or even New Haven or Detroit-style pizza. If you are truly gluttonous, though...
They will ship you Guy Fieri's famous trash can nachos, which I kid you not, are the ultimate game day centerpiece. So if you're looking to host an epic Super Bowl party, or any party for that matter, go to goldbelly.com and get free shipping and 20% off your first order with promo code DAN. That's goldbelly.com, code DAN, for free shipping and 20% off your first order.
Don Levitard. I took my son to the barbershop to get a haircut, and my man gave out some limp dap.
Oh, no.
Damn, damn, damn. Stugatz. I disowned him. I threw him right under the bus. I was like, whose kid is that out here dishing out limp dap?
This is the Don Labrador Show with the Stugatz.
Dominique, sorry. I'm sorry.
Who's going to win the Super Bowl?
We all are, man. It's going to be a fun game that we'll enjoy. It'll be a tremendous experience. Watch some commercials and all that stuff. I think Kendrick's going to win the Super Bowl. Kendrick Lamar, Super Bowl champion.
I think SZA's going to win the Super Bowl.
I don't know.
My money's on Kendrick. Oh, man. SZA's got a moment going.
Dominique, what hotel are you staying at? What is happening right now? Why would you ask that? Because I thought you had this amazing thing to talk to him about. It is. It's the Super Bowl. Who's going to win the Super Bowl? Yeah. The best you have?
I'd like to know. We really just want a most down. I don't want to do this. What's happening? We just had a great. We were doing something.
We were dancing.
We're having too much fun. Dan's going to fly right now. Speaking of flight, Dominique.
He's listening, by the way.
We all know he's listening. I know. That's why Jeremy wore that color green, just for Dan. Dan was worried. Dan said that he's happy to take vacation. The audible sound of laughter through the glass that you may be able to catch is Jess's reaction to that premise. I believe that Dan is worried. I believe that Dan should be on vacation. He's not on vacation. You know that, right? He's working.
I mean, he's not working the whole week. The whole point is to give him time, right? He's doing this show with Dan Patrick, which everybody in New Orleans, if you're listening, go watch. It's at Tipitina's, which is an awesome venue. You know, go do that. But after that, like Dan should have a weekend to himself. He should be, you know. Painting the town red. That's right.
Another thing people don't say anymore. Is that a 90s reference? I don't know. 20s CB.
Dominique, you can be our scout on the ground and let us know how much fun is being had. Yeah, please.
By Dan?
Yes, that's correct.
No, I think you guys misunderstand what Dan thinks is fun. Dan, like what you guys think is fun, not what Dan thinks is fun. Complaining? Oh, he's in his element. Dan is just going to be out there searching for some shit to go wrong so that he can then complain about it when he gets back. And he'll be so happy that he had some shit go wrong.
The only thing I want to see from the Super Bowl content wise is Charlie doing his Dan impression to Dan.
Oh, yeah. Make that happen and send that video to us exclusively, please, for YouTube and the DraftKings Network.
Charlie, my co-host, he flew to New Orleans yesterday and he was on the flight with Jane Daniels.
What? Oh, my God. How excited was he?
Oh, he said that he walked, it was Jaden and his mom, he said he walked up to Jaden and said, you changed my life.
We know he's probably said this in the nerdiest way possible, right? Can you do a Charlie impression, Dominique?
I can't, actually. If you can imagine, the voice I imagine Charlie used is the voice that Charlie uses to impersonate Dan, which is also the voice that Amin uses to impersonate Adam Silver.
Oh, a little weak voice like that? That's exactly what Charlie's dad impression sounds like. You changed my life, Jaden Daniels. Thank you.
Changed my life. I want to get back to the game. I want to get back to the game of what do you tell the person that you're the biggest possible fan of? Charlie went with, you changed my life. Think about that. We have a video, though, I want to play.
If success was an indication that he might have earned, all because it feels like... Robert Kraft just talking bad about him behind closed doors. Like, that's shocking to me that no one would be willing. Because the owners don't like each other. Like, some of them like each other. I'm shocked that someone didn't just go hire him just to piss off Bob. Somebody hates Bob in there.
Yeah, but that's because they run this business like a monopsony. Oh, here we go.
Dominique, it's a cartel. It's a cartel, Dominique. Oh, I thought you were going to mock me.
That was you saying, Dan, it's a monopsony. And then Dan goes...
No, Dominique, it's a cartel, and Bobcraft not getting anyone to hire Bill Belichick, that's some gangster s***. Oh, my God.
great the gangster the gangster shit sounds like mickey mouse in south park the last time that he did it was um one of last week's shows and we've added a new element to it it's now the hokey word play that's our new element that we've added to it is when he does like a double entendre type of situation yes Oh, I know this move.
It's the move you do as a writer and you think you can do it just speaking. And it's a real heat check.
It's very much like a 50-year-old man trying to rap is what it comes off as.
Can you give me an example?
The Michael Jordan, the souls of Michael Jordan. Do you know that one, Amin?
No, I don't.
Dominique, you got it.
I don't know if I can get my voice high enough.
Well, just say it, and I'll say it in the high-pitched voice.
Okay. When Dan was in China, he said he was walking at the Great Wall behind the souls of Michael Jordan at the place that took the soul out. out of Jordan, something like that. It was actually, that's actually a good example of it. I don't like that one, because that's actually really kind of cool.
The rest of them are. Are we now realizing that Dan's kind of a good writer? Is that what's happening right now? No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. We know Dan's a great writer.
But the other times, he was talking shit to me in text, and I said, agreed. And he was like, agreed, and then put a space between it and wrote, agreed.
Oh, no.
I was like, yeah, like, no, no.
Nah, bro. Nah, bro. That ain't it, bro. That ain't it.
Plus, I thought Seoul was in South Korea.
Oh, that's not. That's just it here for a second. Dan would have kicked Amin out for that, I would assume.
But Stugatz! These gladiator games! Graffiting the church of football, the cathedral!
I love Dan. I hope Dan's listening to this. I hope he's not. Have you guys seen a person that you were an enormous fan of and you wound up saying something like, you changed my life to them? Is there a thing? David, who is the person you would most be excited to encounter? Do you have a thing you know you'd want to say to them?
There was an actor named Alan Alda.
Oh yeah.
He's still alive. M.A.S.H. It was the Hawkeye and M.A.S.H. And there was an episode of M.A.S.H. called The Joker. And when I spoke to Alan Alda about it, when I met him, I asked him about that episode and he didn't remember it. and I recall being devastated. How can it be? And now that I've done 1,200 nothing personal shows, I absolutely understand that you don't remember things that you do.
He remembered lines at the time he recorded it, and it changed my life. And I said to him the next time I saw him, I don't know if you remember, but we talked about this episode that you did not remember filming, and I thought that you were crazy, and now I realize that you're normal. and the concept of people who pretend that they remember everything they've done, you can't do it.
And then he said, and you are? No, he, thank you.
Wait, so you saw him a second time and brought up something he didn't remember the first time?
Is there anything else you learned from the most popular television show of all time through podcasting?
He does, wait, explain to me what you mean, because he is a podcaster. in his 80s. He embraced technology.
What I mean is that you went to the star of the most watched television show of all time at one point and said, I know what your life is like, I have a podcast.
No, this was, you're absolutely wrong. I'm sorry, I didn't tell it right. I was 20 years old. I hadn't even started law school. I hadn't even finished college. You talk about the second meeting where you say, I was 23 years old.
Are you stalking Alan Alda?
What is happening here? I just happened to know him. And you can play it, whatever. He's Alan Alda. It's not even worth it. We're not going to play it. He's got Parkinson's. He is in his 80s. And he does this really cool podcast now. I feel like we should play it now because I feel bad. You should feel bad. Alan Alda is my acting hero, and personally, he is an amazing person.
He's an amazing person. He commuted back and forth from New York to L.A. to film MASH because he wouldn't move his family to L.A. for that 11 years. What?
I can't believe we're doing mash tag. It's not on a Greg Cody Tuesday. It is happening. That's so unexpected.
Everything David says and this episode of the Dan Lebitard Show is presented by Venmo.
I wish I was down there now. I mean, I wanted to be down there before, but I never wish I was down there more than I did the last four or five minutes or so. Like... Now, I get, like, I think you guys are all tremendous. I will have one piece of criticism for the man in the middle chair.
Yeah, I felt, I felt that.
Pablo, Pablo. Yeah. I'm gonna need you, like, at the next break. I'm going to need you to grab this show by the throat. The next segment, you need to have a real legitimate hardcore football or sports topic ready at some point. And you throw it in there, and then you spin off of the hardcore football topic into silliness, and then you bring it back to the hardcore sports topic.
It just feels like we out here willy-nilly right now, and I don't like willy or nilly.
Another thing people don't really say anymore is willy-nilly, by the way. Let's keep a running list.
Willie Nilly's making a comeback. He's making a comeback.
I think you're being Willie Nilly. Nilly Willie. Willie Nilly. Who's going to win the game? I see what you mean now, Dominique. I see what you mean now. That's the best we got. No, look, here's the bad news. Here's the bad news for the steering wheel in front of me. It has the word, there are vultures circling the Elser written on it.
And that's what I was going to lead with the next time we came back from break.
Nope. Throw that out. I don't know what it is. If it's the Luca trade, the Aaron Fox trade, it's whatever you want. You got to find something and that's what you start with. Okay. Next segment, Pablo.
They're not just vultures, they're turkey vultures. Mm-hmm Ron we got Ron McGill on to talk about the vultures.
I mean first meatloaf then burgers now now vultures I mean, what what is what is turkey not gonna come after?
See we're done with that. Let's not come back. You did it. You can't do that any better. He nailed it. All right We're done with that. All right, you did it. Don't bring up the vultures anymore.
Are they healthy vultures? I can't tell if Chris is feeding me lines or just saying them now into the microphone for everybody. It's hard to distinguish. Turkey vultures, that was all me.
I can't have that.
If it's just in your ear. Dominique, in New Orleans, there's been a lot of talk. I do want to get a quick thing in while we still have Dominique. There's so much talk. Roger Goodell coming out and talking about how things aren't scripted, how the Chiefs aren't favored. The head of the NFL Referee Association released an entire... Scott Green. Scott Green. Scott Green.
I've interviewed Scott Green before. He released a huge... on episode 190 of PTFO about how referees only cover two games per year for a team and that you'd have to have every referee involved in this sort of corruption and they're the best in the business, et cetera.
As a player, and we talk to players a lot about this, did you feel ever that there was any sort of refereeing that in any way went either for you or against you?
No, I never felt like there was any bias. And it's something that I don't know. I'm sure Amin has probably had this conversation with youth athletes also is like, who cares? It's out of your control. So I've never given it enough thought to think that anyone's cheating. Of course, there were bad calls in my favor and bad calls against us in every game that you play.
But it's something that's completely out of your control. And I assume that maybe it's not just an athlete thing, but I kind of feel that way generally about the world around me. It's like...
i don't know ain't gonna work out counterpoint let's storm the capital right like are you saying it's a 50 50 get back here dominique is that your point it all evens out in the end you just have to stick around no no it's it probably that's true but it's honestly it's like it's not in your control and complaining about it isn't gonna fix it they're going to be issues and maybe honestly like the experience in in
the life experience that I was kind of alluding to is like, no, it never evens out, but who gives a shit? It's just the way it's going to be.
David, when it comes to referees, this is one of the things why I think Adam Silver isn't as strong as he needs to be. We've had over the last couple of years several instances of players and coaches insinuate that the fix was in. And I said, look, man, you can call the ref stupid. You can call him blind. You can even say, hey, that ref doesn't like me. There's a personal vendetta.
What we cannot ever allow in our sport is to have people question the integrity of the sport, meaning these guys are on the take, doing money signs, talking about they wanted them to win or whatever. That's the stuff that should not fly. The league has been very soft on that. And I think the NFL is the same thing. You need to kill that.
immediately not only with your players and coaches but also with your broadcast partners right if you're fox if you're cbs nbc or espn you want our rights you can't be talking that craziness amazon too you can't you can't talk about the refs wanted them to win you can say he got a superstar call that's very different from there's a script or there's there's some sort of nefarious kind of uh thing at play
But that distinction of there are superstar calls, and the NBA, by the way, is pretty, I would say, unique. It's unique among sports where it's like every call has room for interpretation. When in the game is it happening? Who is committing it? Who is the person who is on the other side of it? Right. Where on the court is it happening?
All of this stuff factors into what makes a good call in basketball. And in the end, look, I guess across all sports, though, the reason why I think it's such a hard conversation is because there is truth. The league likes to think of refereeing broadly as a dial to turn. Right? We're over-correcting for some things, we're trying to make up for other things, that happens.
In the NBA, we saw it, I mean, scoring's way up. What happened? They interpreted the rules differently. Mid-season, and the things changed. In the NFL, there are things that are called now, Dominique, that didn't used to be called that way, because there was an actual change. The specific, though, favor trading of, we are rewarding a superstar team as an entity, That's where I agree.
We're leaving the realm of... Oh, the NBA trade deadline, it never stops. Via Chris Haynes, Milwaukee Bucks are trading three-time All-Star Chris Middleton to the Washington Wizards for Kyle Kuzma. How about that?
Stop the show for that. Poor Chris Middleton. You say Bucks, I think Giannis. Well, no, Giannis gets some help now. He gets Kuzma.
moves before moves.
Ah, the move before the move. Love the move before the move. Oh, this is a pre-move. Yeah, that's breaking news. All right. Thank you, Dominique. You got us back on track.
I deserved that.
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