Last Podcast On The Left
Episode 598: The Horrible Lives and Deaths of the Saints - The OGs
Fri, 15 Nov 2024
This week the boys travel way, way back - to the days before the advent of the Holy Roman Empire to examine the dark, bloody history behind a handful of "The OG Saints" and the often brutally gruesome tales that led to their consecrations. For Live Shows, Merch, and More Visit: www.LastPodcastOnTheLeft.comKevin MacLeod (incompetech.com)Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 Licensehttp://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/Subscribe to SiriusXM Podcasts+ to listen to new episodes of Last Podcast on the Left ad-free and a whole week early. Start a free trial now on Apple Podcasts or by visiting siriusxm.com/podcastsplus.
Chapter 1: What are the dark tales of the OG Saints?
Chapter 2: Who was Mother Teresa really?
They are middle managers for the Godhead, who is supposed to literally be the most powerful creative force in the face of the planet. But what this shows you is that sometimes God... doesn't care. And that he needs to pass you off to his other guy. Oh, you want to do well in your roller skating competition? Talk to St. Rollesifer. He's the guy in St. O'Wheels.
I gotta do shit like make volcanoes that kill deer that no one can see.
Well, saints don't perform miracles per se. Only God or Jesus are supposed to be able to do that. They can intercede on God's behalf. For example, if you're a sailor out at sea during a storm, you can pray to saints Nicholas, Christopher, or Elmo. And one of them might tell you to take a right instead of a left while the ship is getting tossed.
And suddenly, that rolling barrel that might have knocked you overboard, it misses your path. Maybe. Maybe. Similarly, if you're having problems with something in particular, like say you've got a problem with your feet... You can invoke Saint Servatius.
Yes, and he shows up.
Oh, yes, this little piggy went straight down my throat. I love the New York Jets.
He's the patron saint of foot ailments. Oh, good. So he might help you out with your foot problems, or at least he could give you some comfort.
It's like the guy that got caught for sucking all the toes.
Oh, yeah.
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Chapter 3: How did saints become magical figures?
It's called fan service, and they're making fun of fan service.
Are they?
Yeah, that's the idea. Pen Pen is making fun of fan service. Is that what it is? It's meta.
It's meta. Okay.
Fuck Abigail.
It's also, I just can't stand to hear a boy whine for 20 hours.
When you get to the end, it's good. Cool. Oh, after the 20 hours? But I am not as good. I don't like the boy whining either, but I like it towards the end. Okay.
Well, Satan then appeared in the likeness of a man who tried to deceive Margaret.
Hello. Hello.
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