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Liam

Appearances

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

104.184

But not like writer or a thing like that because we're all kind of doing that.

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

1117.52

For what culture? I feel like he's a few things, isn't he? Yeah.

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

1137.435

Yeah, I think, I don't know his percentage, but... He's not 100%? No. I think the more successful he gets, I increase the percentage in my head. Yeah. I think he's a halfie.

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

1168.659

Yeah, you read it once, and then you're like, I could bring this into a conversation. That's how I feel with articles.

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

1254.939

You're a grinder, because I feel like even before that, you've been grinding with online stuff, but still getting on stage.

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

135.85

Oh wow. Yeah. I would do that. Yeah. That sounds great. That sounds fucking awesome. Doesn't it? Yeah. And you don't have to hear the feedback right away of like, like doing a joke on stage. You're just like, I think this is good. Yeah.

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

1519.326

Yeah, yeah. You were in the outdoor fest, right? Yeah.

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

1647.714

I mean, it sounds like, especially at that time, it's probably really fulfilling to, like, have... This is, like, your purpose. You're, like, doing that and helping other people, like... keep their lives together.

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

1699.437

My first touring again was, I think, well, I was doing shows, but not touring yet. Yeah. I think my first show back was February 2021 at an actual club. And it was Acme. And they had, like, Acme in Minneapolis. No, no, no, no. That's a great fucking club. It was my first time. So my first time there was in the pandemic.

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

1721.07

He's, like... Chinese, I think. You know what? I'm going to get it wrong, too. But I think Chinese. I'll say it. Yeah, yeah. Can you say it? Louis Lee.

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

1744.623

I think he likes... clean i'm not super i'm not super clean either you're kind of clean i mean some of the stuff oh nice man shoot but online my stuff is maybe cleaner but in the i should i should catch up but uh yeah me too let me tell you right now if i finish this yeah i'll be a different person okay oh yeah i don't want to meet him i don't drink that much shit oh boy yeah

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

1769.369

I don't know if this is weird to say, I kind of like just started drinking again on Valentine's Day. Wow. For real?

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

1775.593

For like a year. So I've had like stints. I like didn't drink for three years, drank again for a year, didn't drink for a year, and then I kind of just got back on the horse.

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

1809.524

Okay, so it's weird. I mean, so my, I feel like for me, it's always been, going on the road and doing clubs is like, I just needed a drink after the show. Like, all right, this is the way, unwind. I just got off work, you know? And then I was like, okay, I'm doing that too much. But then it wasn't like, I think there was other things that was the bigger issue for me. Coke. Yeah. Yeah.

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

1830.746

I mean, it's just like... No, no, no, no. We'll see. We'll see.

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

1839.812

It's one of those two things, I think. But, um... I can't... And I'll just let you guys decide. Pussy, coke, alcohol, pussy, and weed. I'll send you some. JR's a big pussy guy. JR. He's a pussy connoisseur.

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

1857.624

But... Yeah. Ah, this is a good year. Excellent year. But I... So I think... But now I'm in a relationship. It looks like my... Now that I'm, now that I've been saved. Yeah. I'm in a relationship.

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

1884.593

Yeah, you're my first. Yeah. And the best because it's the only. Yeah. Also. Yeah, but I, but she kind of wanted me to like start drinking again with her. Oh, wow. So we kind of have this thing where it's like, I kind of only drink with her or like at work. It's weird.

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

1907.572

No, no, you guys are my relationship too. So we're just work?

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

1913.677

Oh, nice. That I kind of want to go back to my ex-girlfriends and be like. And show them what you've learned?

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

1933.109

Yeah. But do you have like a go-to like routine? It's like your set? Or do you like, do you riff?

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

1950.828

They film this, but they don't film that. Some, like, fact-checking or, like, show her reactions.

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

2037.649

It's like actual, this is the person you hang out with the most. How long have you been dating your girlfriend? Four years.

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

2051.134

Well, first of all, if, babe, if you're listening to this, it's the best.

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

2065.825

You my first, you my last, you my everything, girl. That's just the Filipino in him. They can't not say it. A little Bruno Mars. Yeah, I'm summoning Bruno Mars right now. Um, but... I would say we have a good routine, I would say. We have the hits, and then every once in a while, I'll throw in like, hey, I've been working on a new song. And I'll throw that new jam in.

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

2090.228

It's like, oh, what's this new jam? And I would say it's like open mic, because sometimes he's like... Yeah, I like the hits a little bit better.

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

2122.611

Okay, let me do my clothes. Chris Rock just walked out. Yeah, yeah.

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

2128.756

I actually have been bumped by Chris Rock, not sexually, but in a... In the bedroom, yeah. Yeah, in the bedroom. Actually, yeah, it was sexually. And he killed that shit.

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

2329.522

I feel like you guys are the devil and angel on my shoulder. No, no, no.

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

2455.207

Is that ever since you had your son, your approach is a little different?

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

2479.28

Why not? Whoa, whoa, whoa. Now I've got to rethink my entire life. I thought I was doing pretty well.

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

2545.517

Yeah. Like if you go to a party and it's actors, writers, whatever, and then comics, you go to the comic and you're like, oh, cool, I feel comfortable now. Yeah.

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

255.752

You're still doing well, but it's definitely, like, it's different. You have to hide that you're, like, super proud, you know? It's like that's the... Yeah.

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

2573.04

No, she's blowing everybody My mom is crazy again I can't believe, oh my God. You guys. You guys. Guys. Mom.

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

2593.43

She is, man, in her 60s? No. Yeah. You want to see another picture? Here, let me see. This is a 60-year-old mom eating sushi on her birthday.

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

2611.714

The older Asians get, the younger you look, too. It's like your body is, I don't know, it's just like, it's magic.

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

2626.86

My favorite thing about Filipino is the culture is very happy. If you go to the Philippines, everybody will laugh at everything. It's so nice. Unless they were at my show that I did there. They didn't laugh at a lot of stuff.

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

2643.038

You know what? Actually, the show that I did there, it was fine. But I think it was... difficult to change my perspective from a Filipino in America to a Filipino doing like a Philippines perspective.

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

2659.752

And that's something I got to take in as like, all right, this next time I come back, let me try to like learn more of the local culture. That's interesting.

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

2684.372

Like certain bits you're like, oh, this perspective is actually more American.

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

2774.187

People know you better. They know about comedy more too. They adjust to the culture of like, oh, this is how stand-up works. We know his set a little bit. Yeah.

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

2799.691

I've done the Philippines twice and some shows in Asia. We're in Asia. Singapore.

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

2817.497

I did this show back in the day. I was backpacking through Asia. I had a weird chapter in my life. And I was like, you know what? I still want to do stand-up. I had no following or anything.

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

2829.881

So it was 2013. I was doing stand-up for two years. And I was like, oh, you know, my girlfriend at the time wanted to volunteer in the Philippines because there was like a disaster. And that was really cool because she was white and she really cared about my country. But for me, I was like, they'll be all right. And I was like, all right, I'll go with you. I'll go with you. Let's go help them out.

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

2860.492

So I went to the Philippines. I volunteered at this... Sorry, I'm laughing because I was going to guess.

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

2871.92

You think Kalilah's going back to the Philippines for a fucking... No, no. She's like, we're going here again? No, but... So we went to the Philippines to volunteer. She wanted to volunteer. If you see my track record, it's a lot of white women.

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

2901.033

Yeah. But, no, so we went, we volunteered. There was an earthquake in Bohol, this island, Bohol.

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

2907.616

So we were volunteering there for a few weeks. And after three weeks of volunteering, I was like, dude, I got the itch. Like, I want to do stand-up. And, yeah. After three weeks with this white girl in the Philippines, I got the itch.

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

2922.389

I mean, it was really fulfilling. We're helping people, all that stuff. But I'm like, I got to tell some jokes, man. Right. And actually, I did do a set for the volunteers. They asked me to do a set on my last night there.

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

2946.692

This guy's really, I can't believe his house just got destroyed and he's just so happy.

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

296.28

Dude, guitar. Filipino dude. Good swimmer. How about your Filipino parents? Yeah, dude.

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

2965.35

guitar and they're like these songs are kind of humorous it's not like Manny Pacquiao's work this guy wow this is we gotta put this guy on TV oh fuck yeah Ellen hired me right after Ellen saw the video we had J.R.

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

3007.404

I'm sorry, I'm sorry. This is how my set goes. I go with one idea, and then I don't know where it ends up.

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

3015.608

So we were volunteering in the Philippines, and then I was like, dude, I was so hungry when I started.

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

3045.724

Dude, I have a story actually. So I was like the one, one of the few Filipino dudes in the group. And so when we go and talk with the locals, like, you know, their house is like, dude, Incheon will destroy all this stuff. So all of the white, like European, Canadian, Australian, hey, JR, can you talk to them? And I'm like, yeah, I got this. Hey, they are wondering what you guys need.

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

309.61

For sure. Really? I got this tattoo with Joe. Are you being serious? Yeah, yeah. He bought my first tattoo at this tattoo place in L.A. This one. It's just a small little Philippine sun from the flag.

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

3099.566

what's up with them over here? We don't know. Okay, let me talk to them.

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

3117.459

Race trainer. I walk around the Philippines and I do get a lot of stares, not as much as my girlfriend. So me and my girlfriend. Is your girlfriend Filipino? She's white and like blonde.

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

3134.29

She's like the whitest possible. So like we'll go there and I think people will want to take pictures with me.

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

3140.552

And they'll want to take pictures with her. Of course.

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

3142.773

They're like, oh, let me get you. And then they'll be like, can you a little bit to the left?

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

3147.415

And then a little bit more, and then I'm not in the picture.

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

3166.538

What is Irish? I'm trying to think of Conor McGregor or something. Conor McGregor. Oh, fucking. Yeah.

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

322.179

but um this is not japanese by the way no no no your house is safe but um yes he got this after a show and then he also had my parents over at the show when i opened for him at msg yeah so they were like super stoked it was probably my proudest moment with them where they're like okay you're not a dentist that's okay yeah are your parents dentists my mom is yeah and both my brothers and their wives too

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

3250.358

You're fucking lying. Yeah, I got it this morning. No, I'm just kidding. Yeah, this morning I had a really good share. Let me see this. Oh my God, it's so silly to show. I don't even want to show. It's a 24-hour one.

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

3263.734

But this is from like... Hey, but you know what's crazy?

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

3272.266

I asked because so so Bert speaking of oversharing I have been to like SAA SLAA so it's like Spanish is the first language sex yeah it's like sex sex anonymous sex I didn't I didn't like have sex or do anything I didn't jerk off for like a year for real yeah it's like a reset thing of like you know I like this is wow this is so weird to share with a chicken I'll overshare then I jerked off this morning

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

3299.011

Keep going. Okay, thank you, thank you. I feel so safe now.

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

3323.986

Oh, okay. Can we have some? I mean, the drinks are really nice.

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

3333.394

I mean, you only live once. Close friends. You never know. It could be awesome.

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

3345.537

Okay. So, yeah, I went to SAA. It's like, it's... Sexual Assonimus.

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

3362.049

Man, I came close. I'm not going to lie to you. So close. She was asking for it. You're not asking for it. No, no. Keep going, keep going. It's Sex Addicts Anonymous. Oh, Sex Addicts Anonymous. Yeah, yeah. So when I speak of the drinking and stuff, I think drinking wasn't as much of my problem. So it was pussy. It definitely was pussy. I like, earlier was the funny one.

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

3388.705

Pussy was my downfall. Yeah. Yeah. It sounds like I get so much pussy.

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

3459.738

Yeah, yeah, yeah. If it's true, I feel like the truth is okay to say always.

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

3510.159

Oh, no, no. So I'm guessing, were they in some kind of?

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

3538.986

I feel like I'm back in the Philippines right now. We're like, go talk. I'm like, do you have water?

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

3549.533

The kids making sweatshirts downstairs, that was cute. Yeah.

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

355.803

Oh, yeah, I have gingivitis right now, for sure. For real?

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

3583.872

Really? I'm not going to lie, I was convinced. For real? For a second. But it's also, I'm not, yeah. Go back to jerking off.

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

3592.25

right now cheers cheers cheers so wait tell me about tell me more about like the sa stuff ssa yeah sa so i mean there actually there's a bunch so there's sa which i think is sexaholics did you ever have a mexican guy come in and go what's up sa and they're like oh wrong room sorry no you're definitely hispanic because you laugh the hardest at that one

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

3622.126

Or you just love Hispanics. Racism. Yeah, so there's SA, which is sexaholics.

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

363.585

Man, probably once. Every time I go to my mom's office, before I have to do the appointment, I floss a little bit.

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

3635.656

So there's sexaholics, which is really strict. And there's sexaddicts anonymous, which is like middle. And then SLAA, sex and love addicts anonymous.

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

3667.94

It's mostly dudes. And a lot of it is on the phone because it's, like, safer. It's, like, it's even more anonymous.

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

3765.146

There's always a friend you got to show your shits to. Yeah.

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

3797.461

I liked you led first with, like, hey, you guys want hot sauce? Yeah. And then the street story.

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

3811.691

Thank you, man. This has been so fun. Oh, my God. It's so soft. The chicken.

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

3834.444

Why not have them cook it for you? Yeah, $1 for that. $1, all right, I'm going hot sauce on this.

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

3839.686

Yeah, my least favorite chicken is a dry, hard chicken. This is like so soft and juicy.

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

3903.188

Yeah, dude. I'm fucking insane. Why do I feel like anyone who gets a motorcycle is somebody who's against it in your life? Do you know what I mean? And it's called a wife.

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

392.107

When my mom does it, you'll like it. Yeah, she's really good. You got a glove? Very gentle. You're like, hey, take the glove off. Hey man, go for it.

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

3922.605

Yeah. Those guys just aren't good at driving, though.

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

4019.661

97. I was playing a video game. I was playing Metroid.

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

4025.934

Dude, no, 100% actually. That's crazy. Because in Metroid, this actually sounds really fucked up, but when your character dies, for some reason the suit comes off, and they're like, oh shit, it's kind of an attractive girl. And I'm playing the video game, then I died, and I was like, whoa. So you were dying a lot?

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

4042.726

You just started killing it. Take the suit off. Take the suit off.

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

4059.383

I don't know. Yeah, our people, that's the big thing. Yeah, yeah.

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

4067.145

Yeah. No, I think I've seen a picture of her. Wonder Woman.

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

407.983

You know how, like, in high school, when people would, like, talk about your mom being hot and stuff like that? I never got a... No, I don't know that.

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

4081.981

Wonder woman how many people do you think that you've jerked off to her like who are like dead now?

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

4108.761

Yeah. Keep going, keep going. Captain Zeta-Jones is alive. Who else is alive? Okay.

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

4123.884

Yeah. Great. And what was the next TV show? Anyway. This is a great Goldie Hawns here.

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

416.966

Yeah, man, I feel like I just realized I have a hot mom, I guess. Let me see a picture. You actually? Yeah. All right, here, let me see if I can find... What if I just had one in my, like, a sexy picture of my mom in my wallet? Yeah, yeah, I got one.

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

4189.319

What? Is she the Olympics swimmer? What is that? Who is that again?

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

4206.753

No, no, no. I actually really want to know because I know the name.

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

4231.608

John Ritter? Oh, yeah, yeah. Wait, he's dead? John Ritter's dead?

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

4257.836

Is it going to be Pussy Is My Downfall? I don't know.

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

4279.209

I feel like I got to a point. I can reach over it. No, thank you. Thank you. You're the only other agent here. Thank you.

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

4291.069

No. Sandra, thank you. Wait, wait, was it? If it's a country song.

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

441.585

Unlock. I'm getting my glasses. Hold on. I feel weird because I'm looking for the hottest picture of my mom. Dude, stop stalling. Show us your hot mom. Please.

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

4476.29

That was very popular back then. That was a big trend. Hashtag AIDS, herpes, genital warts.

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

449.167

Show us your hot mom. I want to do her justice, you know? Like, I don't want to, I want to like, yo, this is my hot mom, dude. Wait, let me see. This is me in high school.

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

4558.553

I swallow that jizz. And I think, thank you, Jesus. I don't use the same sentence. I don't use the same sentence. I wait like three seconds.

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

4608.132

We got to put that on Spotify. I think it's a 10 minute song.

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

462.513

No, I look like I'm five in high school. Wait, where'd that go?

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

468.376

Yeah, yeah. This is her. This is me in high school. This is my mom. It's like a mother-son luncheon. I can't do it. It does feel weird because, like, her hand is on my side.

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

484.915

That's a good choice. Like I said, yeah, that's cool. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's safe.

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

569.38

That's true, that's true. Do you talk about it on stage? No. You leave it a mystery? I do, yeah. I think it's fun. Dude, you could make so much more money.

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

626.366

I feel like Joe is kind of like a legend in our people.

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

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I just pictured a dude with a cowboy hat and denim and a guitar. I assumed he was important.

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

81.204

So, yeah, I went to SAA. It's like... Sexual Assault Anonymous?

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

820.615

Yeah. It's like him holding a guitar shirtless with like boxing gloves around his neck.

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

826.299

But I feel like if I don't say that it's legit, something could happen to me.

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

832.324

Yeah, the next time I set foot in the Philippines, they'll take me to a back room. Yeah. Have you been to the Philippines? Mm-hmm. Is it nice? Really? You've never been? No. Dude, you would have an amazing time there. Have you been? No. They're Catholic, right? They're Catholic, yeah. Very Catholic.

Bertcast

Something’s Burning: Sober Coins + SAA with Noel Miller + JR De Guzman | S5 E06

889.656

Well, I think you had a bit about every Filipino you met you thought was an unmasked Jabbawockeez. Was that you? Yeah. I still think about that to this day. It's true. Yeah, because it could be real.

CreepCast

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So he says here, he says, after half an hour, I decided I had to do something. Has Mira told you about her appointments? No. Well, we've been trying to get pregnant for years. Long, painful year.

CreepCast

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brain of a 12 year old i'm sorry long painful years okay it's just so important for her to have a baby and you know she blames me for our problems man he's dumping on a 16 year old this i was gonna say this 16 year old is i mean this is a this is a heavy load this is

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a lot yeah you know do you know that my wife in there who's losing her job blames me for infertility do you know she thinks it's mine and he's like i just i'm still high i'm ditching school exactly he's like he's like did you know we got uh swiss cheese in we offer swiss cheese now he's like i want her to be pregnant which i've been trying so hard but you know she blames me right

CreepCast

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Every day she looks at me like it's me. Do you know what that's like to come home and see?

CreepCast

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And then I have to go to work. I have to provide for this house while she runs this dead-end job. And then I'm the monster. I come home and it's me. I'm the devil.

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Yeah. The old man smiled at me and told me that I could have it for free. It used to belong to a kid who was about my age that didn't live here anymore. There was something weird. What? What?

CreepCast

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No, no, no, no, no, no. You're doing the thing. Oh, did he move? You're doing the thing. Oh, did he move?

CreepCast

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10217.012

I'm sorry about Boroska, okay? I know that you have this knee-jerk reaction whenever kids come into stories now because of all that. I get it. But just because you have an old man who's like, oh, well, I came across this cartridge. Yeah, it belonged to some kid who lived around here. I don't really need it. You can have it. It is not infeasible. Kid moves away.

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to the third floor and entered tom's apartment through his bedroom window what what is with hold on pause real quick what is with you like anytime you have to read text normally it's impossible but if you're playing a role you could read an encyclopedia fine i don't know it's like it's like you switch into a brain mode where you're just like dyslexic I feel like I might be dyslexic.

CreepCast

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Parents start giving his stuff away. Old man buys like a trunk of clothes or whatever. Who knows what? And oh, look, there's a game cartridge in there.

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Oh, I bet he's a perfectly normal guy. He could rationalize it in his mind. Our protagonist could rationalize the interaction as just like a weird way to phrase some kid that lived down the street. The next sentence he says that he phrased it weirdly, but it's not the old man going, it's the kid I had in my basement. It's just like, oh, a kid lived around here.

CreepCast

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And that's enough nuance that your brain could be like, oh, that's a weird way to say it. I love that the literal next sentence is, there was something weird about the way the man phrased it. Yes, clearly there's something weird about it, but that's not immediately like, I capture children. Okay. All right. Can I go back to the story? Yeah, I'm waiting to hear what happens next. Are you?

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Unless you're playing a character, then it goes away.

CreepCast

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10447.478

Yeah, someone's like overdosing on the floor as the TV's like, I don't know about this, Bristol. We ought to get you back. Hold on.

CreepCast

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I, uh, it's, it sounds like, I'm sorry, I'm just thinking about the overdose. Oh, God. Dude, stop. It smells like horchata in here. It smells real bad. Meanwhile, on the TV behind him, just Mr. Wellers don't like it.

CreepCast

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You're playing a character without dyslexia, so it just goes away. A character who doesn't have dyslexia, perfect. Do you think anything happens that they don't know about? He looked back towards the building, looked upset, had some fear in his eyes.

CreepCast

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I didn't like how close you were to the mic. That was in my brain.

CreepCast

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10648.381

Stop, stop. I just farted. It stinks out in the hallway because I farted.

CreepCast

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can i read the story yeah go ahead you're sad you complained about sidetracking and here you are talking about taiwanese yeah that was bad that was bad that was bad i know that's yeah i'm sorry for five minutes about how i derailed the show i'm sorry i'm sorry people don't deal with anything relating to that sort of business around here anymore that was all a long time ago

CreepCast

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Following her statements, she attempted to be cheerful again, excusing herself to the restroom and wishing us the best on our return trip to New York. Okay, if this is a Boroska scenario, I didn't do it. Okay.

CreepCast

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It can be. It certainly can be. And I had a bit of a tense there, too. But at the same time, I've said that to people. Like, I've been at a gas pump and seen someone with, like, a Pennsylvania tag and be like, what brings you down this way? Or whatever. It's just a Southern thing.

CreepCast

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that's your second question you always ask people what that we had a point oh the whole like talking to people i had a conversation with something the other day because someone else had tennessee tags and he was like oh what brings you down this way and i'm like ah down here blah blah and we started talking about tennessee and stuff like that it's just i'm not you can have nice one minute conversations with strangers don't look at my car anymore is what i would say okay are you i'm sorry are you from new york because you're acting like a yankee

CreepCast

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10848.212

That's because they're afraid. No, that's because. Okay, for one. Your wife sure does look pretty in that passenger seat. No, no, no, no, no, no. You're describing two different things. Stop doing the accent right now. No. Stop. Mr. Wellers, I will tell Mr. Wellers this immediately.

CreepCast

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No, there is a difference between someone going, oh, cool, what brings you this way?

CreepCast

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1088.331

I can't read anything. Hunter's adapted the role of the aging bald man so well that his glaucoma set.

CreepCast

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10934.451

Are you the Grinch? What the heck? You don't like the smell of bacon?

CreepCast

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10956.812

Here's what here's what needs to happen at some point. I mean, you need to go camping and I'm going to make bacon.

CreepCast

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10964.158

I have you ever. OK, sure. Smelling bacon in an enclosed kitchen is one thing. But have you ever been like outside and like smelled bacon like on a campfire type stuff?

CreepCast

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10988.674

Okay. How you randomly drops.

CreepCast

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10998.577

Yeah. But every time you let me know who you are as a person, it makes you less human. You, the things you dislike, I will stop.

CreepCast

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11013.89

I don't want that because it's great material for the podcast. Okay. And more importantly than anything to do with you is the success of this channel. Let's get that. Well, I mean, I'm glad we're at least in agreeance there. You keep being strange, but I'm just saying that the things that you have issues with aren't like things people have yes or no's about. It's like core human experiences.

CreepCast

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You're like, well, it's just funny, you know, death. Or it's also like, oh, you know what I hate the smell of? Food. Yeah, I didn't say death was funny.

CreepCast

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11050.328

Every day I'm slightly more convinced you are bug people in a hunter-shaped costume.

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11145.817

I love him. Is that right? Remember our podcast? That was a lot of fun. Hey, hey, especially we like that, don't we? And the bugs are just like all over the mannequin's face. It's like they're like chewing through it. It's like just sounds like sounds like a bunch of cicadas in the room.

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11177.83

I'm going to make podcast episodes with it too, where it's just like sitting there and I'm like, remember, remember Tommy Taffy? It was pretty wacky, huh?

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11187.857

hey hunter i like to think i like to think that you're you actually go so manic that you you're having a conversation with it but people can't hear the other end so right yeah i've said it i've said it in public like hey what would kyle from boroska say and then i'm quiet for 20 seconds and i'm like oh hunter classic hunter for sure my wife's left me i live in like a motel room now

CreepCast

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11218.37

Well, what a... Now the tone was dramatic.

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11223.255

This is what you do. You take something. No, no, no. Shut up. Shut up. You take something that is like funny and normal. You're like, you know what would make this so much worse? I never want to hear you say the word Baraska again or Tommy Taffy because you do it with real life scenarios. It's so much worse.

CreepCast

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All right, anyways, let's continue. When I asked her what was wrong, she said she had a dream that she was lost in the woods outside and something was following her. I cuddled with her until she fell back asleep and eventually I draped it off too.

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So this goes back to my kind of overarching thesis with you that you just hate fun.

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Can someone, can someone in the comments put up a, put up a scoreboard right now?

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Oh, you're talking about weight. Oh, you just randomly go all my big brothers and sisters. I'm like, Whoa, what are you talking about? I'm talking, I'm talking the thickums. What was I even talking about? Oh, the things you don't like. Yeah. You don't like talking to people at gas pumps. You don't like cuddling. What a crime. You don't like... What was another one we brought up?

CreepCast

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11329.475

I mean, there's several. Someone mentioned up... For one, we haven't said that before, but sure, throw that up there. Any guy who does not like grilled zucchini is an enemy. All right? What are you talking about? I do, actually.

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Like she got stumbled and like transformed into a grown man for a second and then went back to talk.

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But yeah, guys in the comments, someone give me a list of like all the... Because I know there's like eight things he said that are completely normal human experiences that he's afraid of. So someone put that together for me. All right. Whatever. Doesn't like cuddling. Anyway, okay. Her nickname has always been Monkey Toes. Long story. Gross. Shut up. Okay. What? Pet names?

CreepCast

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You don't like pet names? Nah, dude. Someone add that to the list. Whoever commented the list I asked for earlier, add that to it.

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11404.672

I didn't know how any of this could be happening. It wasn't just that she was asking for help. That was a big part of it. It was that my name is Thomas. Oh, that's a fun... Okay. That's a fun end to part one. I like that.

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Shut up. What do you mean, meh?

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11431.578

I don't hate fun.

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The alpha, a muscular three foot tall son of a bitch named Rocco has been spotted multiple times chewing on people's tires. It has been run over at least twice, but keeps coming back.

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11460.008

Okay, whoever has the list going, I'm going to start a list in this room of the stuff that is normal that people like. Add raccoons to it.

CreepCast

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Hunter, stop, okay? Raccoons are my favorite animal in the world. I love them to death.

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11482.164

Growing up in East Tennessee, they would come up on the porch at night and put their little hands out. They'd want marshmallows and stuff. They're just sweet little creatures in nature.

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Dude, they would get into the trash.

CreepCast

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there we go with the accent changing now I'm Creole or something, whatever that is. No, that's Alabama. Okay. Look, the, the raccoons are like these little sweet creatures. They're like little cats, kind of fat. And then like, other than getting into your trash every now and then they'll just hang out near the house. They're cute. They carry their babies around. They're adorable.

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Everyone likes raccoons. The only time they bite people's fingers is when like people mess with their babies or something like that. Like, They're perfectly peaceful. I love them. They're cool. I love raccoons.

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Someone at one of the live shows, which is as you described them, terrorists, um, they have a pet raccoon and they wrote me a letter and then had their raccoon do a little paw print on the bottom of it. It was so cute. I would have crumbled up and I would have thrown in their face and said, get that shit away from me. I bet you would. You know what? Why don't whoever shows up at the live show?

CreepCast

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Why do you want to talk to that guy? You don't meet and greets just for me. It'll be a better show.

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Okay, if someone in the comments of this one leaves like the list of stuff Hunter doesn't like, I promise I will write it down somewhere here and we will keep a live tally of things that he is like bad about.

CreepCast

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Yeah. A couple things. Rational man. Talking to people in public, like speaking to someone at a gas station, that was one. Rational. Cuddling. That was one pet names, but just anything that involves care or love. You're just, you're just against. Okay. All right. Yeah. He quit. He quit. Cause he's knows I'm right. Anyway, back to the gas station.

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Well, it depends on how many times they interacted with each other.

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And then also to have her be like... No, Hunter, because you are my friend. Okay. And it's not weird for friends to help their friend bring in groceries.

CreepCast

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Give me that one.

CreepCast

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If I'd met you one time and you just started helping to be like, well, that's a little much. I can agree with that. Thank you. But then you took it to an absurdist level by saying, like, oh, if I helped you with groceries, it's like, okay, no. No, no, no. Because I know you and you're my friend.

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I'm giving you back shots. Is that what you're saying? Is that what you want to put out into the aether to see what happens?

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That is not what I said. You said it. No, you said it. No, no, no. Okay, I think more importantly, while we're on this topic, I would like to thank Agnovelli, who in the last episode...

CreepCast

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uh has begun putting together the comprehensive list of the things hunter hates uh and i just want to run through them really quickly with you just so you can confirm or deny okay are you there yeah all right so uh gas station small talk yeah i don't like it nope okay raccoons nope correct pronunciation of words especially anaconda solemnity etc

CreepCast

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So, all right. Especially, uh, I'm, I'm just going to, I'm just making this list so that, uh, it can be accurate. Um, cuddling. No. Yep. Uh, quote that son of a bitch at Chick-fil-A. I like that guy. Okay.

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I'll agree. When you get to a level of like private intimacy of public, it's holding hands and stuff. I don't care. How do you feel about handholding and like cheek kissing? And like what kissing? You say feet kissing? Cheek kissing. Yeah, feet kissing. That's what I meant. The natural progression from holding hands. I don't know how you fly down there, buddy. Cheek kissing. Cheek kissing.

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Like kissing someone on the cheek.

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All right, I'm leaving that one up then, the PDA. Children.

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Okay, children calling parents mommy or daddy.

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Jeff Goldblum impressions. Don't need an answer on that one. Meet and greets.

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The hesitation. No, no, no. I want to put out there.

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I can't wait to see you. The feeling of blankets on cold nights. Oh, I love them. Pet names.

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I'm just laughing.

CreepCast

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No. No, you can't. You have to still like pork bacon and you can prefer turkey bacon. I can't help.

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Waste of space. Get them out. All right. Disney adults. Oh. That one's fine. Probably the worst. That one's understandable.

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I feel like I'm like a doctor's visit. Taylor Swift.

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Taylor did, uh, root beer.

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Hmm. Uh, I'm going to add cream soda as well. Go ahead and put it on there listed, but we're going to put that on there. Uh, let's see. Uh, gravy.

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That is disappointing. That's actually really, you know why I'll tell you. And it's not, what kind of gravy do you guys have in the Midwest? Like a white sausage based gravy. That's what we'll do. Why we'll do squirrel gravy a lot back home. What? But sausage gravy. Yeah, squirrel gravy is really good. It's very, very sweet. God. It's delicious. Yeah, sorry that I live. Okay, 17. Let's see.

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That's 18. Settlers of Catan.

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All right. I'm going to go ahead and mark that as a yes as well. Christmas. I love Christmas. Okay. Vegetables.

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uh was it should we should we squirrel pot pie would that be better how about house cat pot pie there isaiah we're just throwing around any animal or you know now i think you're just being kind of racist against uh against appalachian folks and uh i'm gonna skirt over that because that's not fuck you disgusting people all right and um

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All right. So with that, that makes exactly 20 things that Hunter hates currently on the list. And it will be sure to continue into future episodes. I now have a tally going at the house. So don't worry, audience. We will be sure.

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Yeah, a whole three. A whole three. Like, others showing happiness. A holy trinity. And, uh, Christmas. A holy trinity. Okay, alright. Alright, well, before you get even more blasphemous, let's get back to, uh... Halfway through entry 30, if anyone still fucking cares. I frown a little, unsure what Bonnie means. She smiles back blankly, then resumes the path back to her car.

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She smiles back blankly like a good guy. A blank smile? That's a horrifying phrase.

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Just the weirdest people you've ever met. Yeah.

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Wintery Bay. With Wintery Bay. That's a funny phrase to say to people out of context. It will be fine when we get to Wintery Bay and just, like, don't elaborate.

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See you there. I wouldn't worry about it if I were you. Don't even worry your little head. Worrying makes it hungry. Oh, you all heard the guy crying in Greek, huh? Yeah, we'll be there ASAP.

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He's looking over at the other ranger like... I'm going to go there.

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Leave it. Leave it. Don't touch it. Please don't. Don't touch it. Please. People will be so mad at me. Please. Please don't. That is stain in the episode. We are out. No. No, no, no. I refuse. I refuse. We're keeping it. There was such confidence. You were so ready for that one.

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We've got to learn to talk to these things. Miyamo.

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I raised my eyebrow at him and smiled. Yeah. He said excitedly and jumped up off the couch. Then, embarrassed, he cast his eyes down at the floor.

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12305.5

This in-person thing is I'm glad I get to act and be the character. Yeah, I get it. The whole time you were reading, I was like, don't look at me, don't look at me.

CreepCast

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Thank you. When we had gotten a decent way into the trees, Jamie turned around and looked briefly at my face before casting his eyes to the ground. He rubbed the back of his neck.

CreepCast

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wanted to kiss you all summer don't look at me when you do that line it doesn't help that anytime i imagine you as a kid it's just you your head now but on a smaller body i was stunned to silence absolutely dumbfounded that jamie had found the guts to say anything like this I knew I needed to fill the awkward silence left in his way. So I did the only thing I could think of.

CreepCast

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I leaned in and kissed him. It was the dude.

CreepCast

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That was so good. Oh, my gosh. Hello, everybody. Welcome to Cream Crew. The show that the other podcast that Hunter doesn't care. Welcome to Creepcast. No, no, no, no.

CreepCast

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12452.356

Not to ruin the tension of this moment, but every time I listen to this part, the thought form sounds like Yandere Dev.

CreepCast

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12525.889

What's the favorite? Oh, um.

CreepCast

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I can't. Okay.

CreepCast

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As soon as we hang out together, I'm going to publicly embarrass you as much as possible. I'm going to walk up to strangers and be like, my friend here wants to know about your day or where you got that purse or something like that. I'm going to do that constantly.

CreepCast

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Anyway. I spent most of my life hunting in those woods, so you can imagine my joy when my parents got me a hunting dog. What was that noise? That was like a growl. No, I did. No, I didn't. I did.

CreepCast

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Uh, my family did stuff like that. I know like the kind of hunting I did as a kid was always like deer hunting or like Turkey hunting. You don't really need a dog for that. We did a lot of hunting dogs. Oh, you did a lot of pheasant hunting. Yeah.

CreepCast

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And my, uh, my grandpa, did you have, did you have one or did you have like several?

CreepCast

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You were seven years old, sitting next to your beloved hunting dog and your uncle, your grandfather, uncle, what'd you say? My grandpa, your grandpa just blew its brains out right next to you. Yeah.

CreepCast

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I was just wondering.

CreepCast

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12719.598

Yeah, I had a hunting dog, but you're like, when I was seven, my grandpa. Wait, so did he shoot it on purpose? No, I don't think so. He was just holding a gun in his wheelchair as he was disabled from a stroke. Okay. Yeah. And so it could have, it might as well have been you that got shot. It was just like an accident.

CreepCast

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No, you should include it. That has to go in the episode. That is a legendary hunter confession.

CreepCast

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The story mentioned a dog, and you're just out of nowhere like, I was seven years old. My grandfather.

CreepCast

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12770.629

Yeah, because the word hunting dog was a flashback for you. It was like a trigger phrase.

CreepCast

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Hold on, hold on. Would you just, I don't know, hypothetically say that maybe that potentially had some effect on your development that led you to where you are now, perhaps, perchance?

CreepCast

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Yeah. But I never found one. You were looking. It's like, it's different. Yeah. I was looking, but that you were just a seven year old, like playing with Legos, like, Oh, they're like, you're like Fido. Your best friend is executed by your grandfather.

CreepCast

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12834.411

That, that was, that was just a lot. Okay. I'm not going to, this is the Friday about that. Yeah. I'm not going to pry to you about that one anymore. That felt kind of rough, but you have to leave it in the episode. That's non-negotiable. So anyway, Sandy wasn't my property and wasn't treated like he belonged to me.

CreepCast

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It was especially funny because as soon as you said deal with it, the connection cut, like you got raided. Yeah, SWAT team just raids it and just beats the shit out of me.

CreepCast

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sandy was a member of the family my best companion and my truest friend that was until my grandfather shot him in the head while i said you too

CreepCast

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That was just a big story for me to just like forget about all at once. I apologize. Okay. I've been talking with my family about taking Sandy, my honey gear, and some essentials to one of the cabins my grandfather owned in his hate. Oh, we're introducing a grandfather. This is actually coming. This is unveiling to be something horrible.

CreepCast

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A few hours of driving later, we were setting up camp in one of my grandfather's secluded old cabins. Here's where things get screwed up. Sandy, I'm so, so sorry. Is this my life? Good God. It's really close. We were going pheasant hunting in Kansas.

CreepCast

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12920.919

Grandpa. My seven-year-old cousin watched this unfold. He now talks about the grossest, most disturbing things he can online. He's extremely respected. You want me to read the text you sent me earlier? Which one? About you going to the bathroom.

CreepCast

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12952.426

Yeah. What other response do you want me to have to that? I don't know.

CreepCast

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If I wasn't busy on Twitter, trying to shill for disaster relief efforts for the Appalachian mountains, I would have tweeted that screenshot. Well, but what I don't want to happen is some like FEMA workers, like, Oh, maybe we can get aid.

CreepCast

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Okay. I'm just going to keep reading. There were still bigger animals that would have liked to take a bite out of him if there wasn't a lot of food for the winter. Heard Sandy's bark fade away in the distance and then stop altogether.

CreepCast

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It's pretty easy to repel in on your set. Thank God! That'd be great. Maybe you think one of them would stick around to finish the podcast with me. That'd be friendly.

CreepCast

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Yeah. R.I.P. Sandy. You must have ran into Hunter's grandfather. Tragic. No, no, no. It is mobility scooter out there for some reason, like the wheels going. I did. What kind of, not to get too graphic, get to it, but what kind of gun was he holding? Because it's more insane. If the guy who like can't move half his body has like a 12 gauge, he had a deer rifle.

CreepCast

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13029.089

So he can't move half his body, but he's in an electric wheelchair with like a full scoped, like bolt action rifle across his leg. Yeah. He can't even lift that. Why? Why does he have that? A man has pride at least. So that's what I, so that's what they told him. I figured tomorrow would be the last day before I'd go into town and see if my father would help me find Sandy.

CreepCast

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13051.035

He was a retired grain man, but I was sure if I brought up Sandy's name, he'd be more than willing to help me search for him. Thankfully, Sandy... I'm sorry. I just, uh, just as a visual of just a guy, a half paralyzed man on a mobility scooter. You know what? Just talking through the woods at night, executing any animal.

CreepCast

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You're bringing your mom into this. What do you mean? You're bringing your mom into this. I'm letting you know right now.

CreepCast

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1317.634

We can bleep or cut any of this. No, you're not.

CreepCast

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13182.535

Hold on. Hold on. Ask if she's gone. If you were, she's gone. This memory is completely ruined.

CreepCast

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13204.173

Oh my gosh. It's not funny. It's funny how you remembered none of it. And it's way more tragic than you initially thought.

CreepCast

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13224.208

You cut that out. Do not leave that in.

CreepCast

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13226.91

if you if you do not leave that in i'm quitting the podcast that is the greatest that is the funniest thing that has ever happened on this show oh my gosh you going from just a normal event like oh yeah it was this accident into like oh we were afraid your grandfather would kill you or something so we put him in a home you know and he died there you know this is a this is a podcast about

CreepCast

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No, no, no. Go ahead. We're having fun. Okay, I'm going to read this story now. 1034 to dispatch. Dispatch, go ahead.

CreepCast

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13257.924

That was, yeah, that is staying in the episode. That is the fuck. That is the wildest thing that has ever happened on the show. Oh my gosh. We are going to hear, you are going to hear about Roger until you're dead.

CreepCast

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No, no. I remember. Okay. So remember the jokes I was making about like, he's out here and then it's too real now. No, no, it is. That is the new villain that is up there with Mr. Weller. I am only hearing all timer.

CreepCast

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I shot myself in the foot immediately here.

CreepCast

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I could see the reflection of his eyes is green pearls. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. Let me redo that. I could see the reflection of his eyes is green pearls in the murder. What?

CreepCast

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13429.768

In his eyes, I could see the reflection of the mobility scooter getting closer.

CreepCast

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13475.43

okay just the image of like a guy who's paralyzed but still has a rifle for some reason oh okay It doesn't help that if I had you at seven years old, it's just you with the exact same head and facial features you have now just on a smaller body.

CreepCast

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13510.097

interjected with my own trauma so thank you for that and i think you know i like this story it was good but it is it has to be one of my all-time favorite recordings because it has brought us to a uh a revelation that i will never let you live down nor will anyone else in the comment section i will i was fighting for my life while I was reading to not make every single sentence.

CreepCast

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Like I looked at my dog. It was strange. The front half was long. The back half was a mobility scooter.

CreepCast

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13540.54

You know, the porch waiting for something to come. I saw the shape of a mobility scooter.

CreepCast

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13551.909

Oh, that was so funny. She has stained our family's character to help.

CreepCast

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13562.759

It's, it's, it's not, it's not the best. I crawled into his outstretched arms as something loud banged against the wall for my sister's room.

CreepCast

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13570.686

oh my god okay well no that that means that like she got thrown right right like he's like he's beating her right yes that's that's what it was he's picking her up and just throwing her good shelves and in the room that's when tommy taffy started making every room in the house a wwe ring watch out watch out watch out watch out watch out watch out

CreepCast

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it's funny if you imagine the dad is like uh randy savage oh yeah that's the wrong answer brother

CreepCast

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really fun use of just like dilapidated buildings too well it gives the overarching feeling that the operator kind of persists and rot right like he's on the fringes of you know society kind of like the upside down it's it's i hate that reference it's like he's uh he's always in the

CreepCast

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13672.097

There's a tree out there. Do you see Slender Man behind it? It's a tree, Hunter. It's not Entry 5, so no. You see him, boy?

CreepCast

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13719.088

i'm i'm here there's a tree man there's a tree be careful most defeated i'm here i'm here end of part seven okay hold on the reason i was laughing at the end i thought you remember the c4 she took at the beginning of the story

CreepCast

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13739.466

yeah i thought she was about to blow up blue jay is what i was laughing about you lack imagination exactly that's what i thought was happening i'm still i'm still laughing over the idea of alice being like you lack imagination boom you lack imagination

CreepCast

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13796.701

They're two different instruments for two different jobs.

CreepCast

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13813.177

Gosh, they're such different characters. I guess I like... the ledger one more because i feel like it's more timeless i really love the joaquin one but to be honest you don't have to you don't have to sway me man i i prefer ledger joker as well that's all we need to know did you have a walking doesn't do anything that a character like travis from taxi driver doesn't do you know

CreepCast

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1382.446

but now i just wanted to pay a little homage is all i want to do the whole thing i appreciate you know between between this bit and the a-cab opening we are going to get destroyed i'm really i'm really getting uh all our texas boys

CreepCast

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13843.914

But I feel like Heath Ledger's Joker is more of a full flamboyant interpretation of just chaos. Wants to crumple the system, whatever it costs.

CreepCast

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13872.893

Tells you things. Says some things, you know, I don't know.

CreepCast

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13878.998

Hello. Next time you see Bluejay, she's wearing Joker face paint.

CreepCast

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13888.582

Yeah, going through the trees. I'm a pariola running the game, and I'm just here to throw a wrench in your plans.

CreepCast

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13902.985

She's dragging Rob by his ankle. He's like bleeding all over.

CreepCast

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All right. Party. Here we go. I ran to my small bathroom and fixed my hair as best I could. I looked like hell, but she would understand. Secret of my own unbelievable behavior and the mess I'd made of the place.

CreepCast

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13994.904

I'm just a little, I get a little weird sometimes. He's like, okay.

CreepCast

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14000.566

It's funnier to imagine him wearing full, like Heath Ledger Joker face paint during all this.

CreepCast

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14006.448

Wow, I'm a character.

CreepCast

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14036.492

You set up one little webcam between a vending machine staring directly at the weird redheaded girl's front door and everyone loses their mind. It's simple.

CreepCast

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14072.625

He already has a pole cue in his hand. Yeah, exactly. It's a magic track.

CreepCast

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14096.31

The image of him talking to her through the microphone of the webcam is so insane.

CreepCast

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14129.824

It's really funny. Cause it's like, Hey, you didn't list the cause of death. It's like, it's been a whole two days. You think we can tell after two days, who are you?

CreepCast

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14140.857

Do you think I'm Batman or something? World's greatest detective. No, ma'am. Come on. How am I supposed to tell? You think I could tell how somebody died from a body? They gotta be alive to tell me that I bought a baby dog toots. And then she's like, okay, did you, why did you say her hair was brewed at?

CreepCast

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First, she wants me to be a magician, figure out how she wants me to look at the body. What, what, who are they hiring down at the, at the department? These sweet heart, you're so much prettier when you smile. Yeah. He just immediately launches into like, has anyone ever told you you're the most beautiful woman I've ever seen?

CreepCast

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14199.478

I don't mean to be too harsh, but it's just a fact.

CreepCast

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14228.287

He's like taking his clothes off.

CreepCast

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14232.441

without everyone's acting so far i would not surprise me this medical they're this police department sucks she's like uh did you why did you list the hair colors brunette and he's like naked rubbing oil on himself he's like yeah coconut oil is great for the skin sweetheart i would like to take you on a date tonight what do you say i'm going to take you to the fanciest restaurant called olive garden

CreepCast

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No, no, no. Leaves. They put leaves in there. Then if you get the potato soup, you can dip the bread in the soup and then it's a whole nother world. It's a different ballgame.

CreepCast

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14296.085

What do you mean they sell pasta here?

CreepCast

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14307.87

disgusting yeah get the out of here the case we're going to raise robin yum okay uh where was i okay yeah um it's i don't know a ghost a demon a skinwalker

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

14340.011

What are we, some kind of suicide squad?

CreepCast

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14362.063

And then I'm like, oh, wait, I did that. Yeah, that was me.

CreepCast

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14370.37

Yeah, yeah, it just follows me around. See, now that I was able to pass on the curse to you all, and specifically you, Hunter, I just have pleasant memories of Boroska. What a nice little story. Psychopath. Yeah, psychopath, yeah. Marcus seems surprised by that.

CreepCast

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14392.74

Marcus seems surprised. Yeah, the detective's like, what do you think happened to your sister? And the boy's like, I think a skinwalker caught her.

CreepCast

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14403.998

I don't know why you thought that, but... I was just going to say someone, you know, pretended to be your mom. What are you talking about?

CreepCast

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14413.863

Yeah, home invasions are pretty common. What is a skinwalker?

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

14424.997

you're dead that's kind of an interesting hook i remember all this from the story because that's like the whole the whole thing it's famous for online and stuff like that that you it's like oh you're actually dead well it's as if the story is a depiction of hell basically i see i see how do you how do you like that reveal how do you like that

CreepCast

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14447.955

uh again it's a little bit i'd be more interested to hear your opinion because i went into reading today knowing it was about hell um i how do you feel about it someone who thought this was like a saw trap thing i don't know you don't know you don't know how you feel about it disappointed i guess you feel disappointed in it you can be honest you can talk it's okay

CreepCast

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You know, it's sad that it's not just a weird torture thing. These guys are dead. Yeah, that's sad. I understand. Well, think of it this way. What is hell if not just one really long weird torture thing, right?

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

14492.253

yeah so we can we can still do the weird torture stuff buddy and you know we can still get all of that this just opens up the door now for maybe some more supernatural elements to it right right that's why it's on okay so we can we can have our weird torture thing we can also have demons and monsters and it also means that you can probably get an unrealistic amount of blood and gore maybe they'll bring in another kid and shoot him in the face again

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

14521.189

you think i think they might okay because now now that it's hell you could realistically shoot as many kids in the face as you want that's pretty cool that's pretty cool isn't it you could just infinitely it could even be the same kid just over and over brought back to be shot in the face would that make you happy it'd be fun it'd be pretty fun wouldn't it so you know maybe maybe don't count it out yet see where it goes from here see what it does with its new idea

CreepCast

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14562.948

How does that make you feel? Does that perk you up to it any? I'm the orientation. You get one question. That's how this works. Does that make you feel anything? Maybe get a little bit of a unique depiction here. Maybe this won't be your standard pitchfork and whatnot. It's like, oh, we have a whole process. There's an orientation. You get one question.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

14585.912

I'm imagining this guy, thanks to your stunning voice acting, I'm imagining Danny as like a Walton Goggins type. So that's cool. You have like a... Like a salesman type is the front door for hell. Isn't that kind of cool? Yeah, I guess. Yeah, pretty cool. Danny spent on the floor chuckling.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

14611.292

It's the pigs. I asked. Unsure. I wanted to know the answer. So how are you feeling now? Huh? I don't know. You don't know. Okay, it's not heaven or hell. It is the black farm. And Danny says God lost control when he put the pig in charge.

CreepCast

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He slithered on the floor like a worm. His bald heads. I'm sorry. That's kind of sick. I'm sorry, Hunter. I thought you were upset when you found out this was a hell depiction.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

14658.878

You just like that? There's something funny about that to you? About disabled people? Something creepy. You know, between that, between you laughing at people getting hurt, between you laughing at Diego, the guy you lived with who couldn't speak your language and stuff. I feel like there is something. Beautifully reminisced.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

14679.732

I feel like there's something to you about the suffering of others that you should probably think about.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

14731.946

Think how dirty his belly is. His teeth had been removed and replaced with long screws which jutted from his bleeding gums like a broken rock formation. That's sick. I'm sorry, I thought you didn't like that this was hell. It's almost like if the author's creative, you can use hell for some very interesting body horror.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

1474.029

I, I, you know what? Without comment, let's continue. Come sit down, Steph. The food's ready. Ordered my sister. The sight of the seasoned meat causing me to salivate.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

14767.93

Because when you use supernatural themes effectively, you can get to some really strange points. Like, I just want to hear you say you were wrong in your conception about it.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

14781.578

We'll see as the story goes on. All right. Of course, if I did want to do it right now, then I would pretend like I've never read the story before, but that did happen.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

14803.804

bro wouldn't it be wild i i this would be a great bit if i if i had read the story previously because like again hunter can't see me when we record these things what if i just like had a shark floating sitting in my lap i would be pissed and you didn't know until you watch the episode when it's posted i would

CreepCast

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14823.874

bro i would watch the episode and i would be like you son of a bitch that's like i i fully couldn't trust you if that became the fact i could there's no way dude i got okay i've got to chat chat chat you guys gotta keep me accountable for this we have to do something like that in the future we gotta prank him with some elaborate okay anyway god oh man that's so good All right.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

1484.151

i thought that was the dad's line for a second so i did too yeah you have to leave it the debt this is the boy being like come sit down steph a six-year-old boy come sit down the food's ready the chicken activated puberty i just gained another ball That's the fourth one this week.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

14849.348

The episode ended with them playing hide and seek with the kids hiding in a closet and Mr. Bear counting.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

14856.738

How are you feeling? Oh my Lord.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

14871.846

Yes! Yeah, yeah, the Poughkeepsie tapes.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

14897.355

That's one of the most effective parts about the story to me is that like it's all relayed through just what the kids saw. So all of the intentions and things like that, you're kind of left to ponder with yourself, you know? Yeah. Because there's something so menacing about that ending too, that they were playing hide and go seek and the kids were hiding in the closet with Mr. Bear counting.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

14921.471

I cannot believe my dad never found this sketchy because he actually took me to the house. What?

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

14970.787

Hold on, hold on, hold on. Let's frame it, right? Because we know what's happening, but he said specifically his dad never saw the station, right?

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

15053.499

Okay, so I'm going to run side interference.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

15058.845

Okay. Hear me out. Ladies and gentlemen of the jury. Okay, the father has not watched the program, correct? Correct.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

15068.46

he has just heard his kid like oh i watched this show about mr bear and he plays with kids or whatever right he thinks that's all it is it's a local show right which means it's somewhere around the region so the kid's like hey can i send a letter to this tv show and dad's like sure so he sends a letter letter comes back and yes while i will admit to the jury That the word, um, cellar is weird.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

15092.91

And that probably should have raised an eyebrow. He's also heard that the TV show is called Mr. Bear Cellar. So, say it was like, it was Elmo's Playhouse, right? If the letter said, I want you to come to my playhouse, that would seem normal. The dad didn't send his child in that direction. He was there with him. Like the dad's like, all right, we'll check it out.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

15116.13

And he walks up with the, with his son and then the police become involved. Maybe the dad saw something, maybe the police were already there. Who knows? Um, but again, I will, I will have that slight caveat about it.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

15148.047

They power up.

CreepCast

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15177.327

Hunter, those are gruesome allegations, and I don't stand for it myself.

CreepCast

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15203.151

I don't know what you're talking about. The defense of what? I just think that he's a good author. He's looking out for his... He's a perfect dad.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

15232.485

Okay, I know I'm a YouTuber, but that doesn't mean I'm a pedophile. Let's get that clear. I know those two often intersect, but...

CreepCast

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15244.896

my line in the god all right that actually that now that you just said that that's probably what it is because christ death on the cross is like the ultimate sacrifice for people so maybe the satanist using it here is implying that the death of the children is the ultimate sacrifice for satan for the fallen angel that probably just dropped in my room holy shit what'd you say god

CreepCast

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15285.036

I don't know how I will say scared the fuck out of me I will say you saying INRI is the one explicitly like Religious symbol that we've mentioned so far and when we mention it the box falls off your shelf, so I want you to keep that in mind hunter

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

1529.249

How old is the kid here that's like a 12-year-old statement? You'd put, I don't know, 10 locks on that?

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

15323.557

Well, I know I know I got I got this And I got uh, and I got this so i'm gonna be all right Regardless of dude you saying this and this and I have no idea what you're referring to is making it even worse dude Because you're not you're not sharing what I could be using to help myself.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

15364.472

That's my nightmare sound. so i'm excited to get to experience it for the first time because most of the time like don't get me wrong it's fun to know exactly what's going to happen and hold a teddy bear up to the camera to terrorize hunter that's great yeah but by the way i how dare you by the way oh yeah the audience never got to see your reaction

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

1541.954

It just makes pop culture reference. You'd have to catch this with the Infinity Gauntlet.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

15434.899

You make me look like a fool. The joy I felt in that moment has to be comparable to holding your firstborn. like wow i'm sure the same thing getting one over on me that much was that was that pivotal you don't understand how satisfying of a burn it is when you're like i think you have a teddy bear it's so good

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

15470.393

And again, I'm actually, normally I just gaslight you by being like, yeah, sure, Hunter. That sounds cool. We'll see, because I know where this is going.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

15485.838

At least, who knows? You could be lying. I have no idea. That's right. Go back into your realm of doubt. Yeah, let it sink in. As I'm sitting here holding a shower head up to the camera.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

15502.263

You rewatched the episode, I'm completely naked, just like... Yeah, yeah.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

1558.023

What is this? Some kind of horcrux? Yeah, she's like, what is this, a horcrux you have here?

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

15587.94

I was still reeling from what she said.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

15610.968

I suddenly realized that she had asked me a question, and my mind grasped for what it was. Yeah! I said much too loudly.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

15669.221

She doesn't know it, but I count the day that I met her among one of the few moments of true happiness in my life. Well, that's an utterly depressing sentence.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

15684.152

Also, the friend vibes kind of strange to me. It's like, why is this girl who goes to party and stuff? Her quote unquote best friend is a guy who doesn't see people for weeks on end. Is she your best friend or is that your perception of her?

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

15714.054

And Hunter, I would say the same about you until you reinforced the meat sweats saying a few minutes ago. That was a significant downturn. But up until then, my life has been better since getting to know you. Despite what the people on the subreddit might think.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

15741.346

Where did it smell like? I didn't know.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

15755.196

That is the deodorant that I use. That is the worst. Why did you have to guess correctly? Why did you have to do that? Dude, I got the nose of a bloodhound, man. Shut up. What can I say? I'm switching deodorant. I'm telling you.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

1577.043

I guess this creature sure was up to no good, huh? I bet he solemnly swore it. Marcus is like, I'm begging you to please stop. I don't understand what you're doing, but I know it's a reference to something and I don't care.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

15777.737

Shut up. You're like a predator. You're like in the woods. I've read. Let me get through this.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

15805.489

Is that your impression of me? Do I have a Creole accent now? Is that what that was?

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

15890.708

Yeah, they get down there in the ball. They get down to the swamp and it's just like, oh, I'm Dr. Wellers. I run a local blood clinic here. Hey, how are you doing?

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

15930.664

You just got a little Paw Patrol bandage. You're like, no, it wasn't that bad.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

15980.777

Username 666. I don't know. Let's find out.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

15994.676

yes i have this channel called 666 um that has 6 000 subs i imagine because of the name and it just has a playlist of available videos lordy hard rock oh wait oh wait don't worry one of the videos is poor poor sakura Here it is, Western man. Here's your YouTube horror legend. It all leads to this.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

16049.562

This is what it's come to.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

16062.104

We probably can't show it because we'll get copyright claims, but man, this really is... The West has fallen. I couldn't figure out what it was from a distance, so I went closer, trying to be as quiet as I could. When I actually got close enough to see what it was, my mouth literally fell open. It was eggs. Huge eggs, all in a cluster, like a nest.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

16085.93

What is happening now?

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

16129.222

uh they were enormous it's hard to explain their size but you can sort of see them in relation to my boot here so what do you mean it's hard to explain i see them they're giant in the previous in the previous photo there's a tree and they dwarf the tree it's literally the these eggs are like what they're bigger than a basketball yeah they're like basketball size just these big giant white eggs in the middle of the forest yeah but when they hatch they need to feed

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

16189.565

You have to be honest with yourself. Say it. You're not losing the chicken narrative, are you?

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

16202.714

Alright, so the giant chickens are out there. I like this one of like the blurred photo of like the bloody skull thing. Oh, it's fun. It's a really fun photo. I think that's neat, yeah. I will mention that I have seen this character drawn in so many times. You don't need to say that. Hello, my name is Mitch. I'm here to tell you guys about an experience I had.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

1621.613

The references don't even make sense. It's like, wow, I sure do feel like a Malfoy about this.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

16228.698

i don't know if it was paranormal or whatever stupid words people used to describe i don't know it was paranormal or whatever stupid words people use for supernatural phenomena like ghosts i already love them i'm ready dude i haven't looked at this story since i was this is once again this has got to be some primo

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

16254.996

Oh, yeah. Well, when I was 12, I'm like, this is so good. Yeah, this is fucking badass. I never liked Eyeless Jack that much, but I remember it. I remember it being, like, favored in the same way other stuff was. Like, Jeff the Killer, the image was out there, so people made a story around it. Same with this.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

16271.789

Don't know if it was paranormal or whatever stupid words people used to describe supernatural phenomena, but after that thing visited me, I believe in that paranormal trash now.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

16290.0

Yeah. It tried to kill me. It tried to eat. It tried to eat me alive.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

16298.408

It's like, that's great. I wouldn't like the idea of me moving in since we had not seen each other for 10 years. So I was excited too. The grammar is killing me. So I was excited.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

16317.186

Wait, they haven't seen each other in 10 years?

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

16323.148

It might be. Yeah, how old are these people? My gosh. I soon fell asleep after I moved in.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

16337.657

It's like, yeah, you mean you went to bed there eventually?

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

16343.061

What the fuck? This is written by an alien. After that first week, I heard rustling noises coming from outside at about one in the morning. I thought it was a raccoon, so I ignored it and tried to fall asleep. The next morning, I told Edwin about it, and he agreed. These commas...

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

16368.158

hey hey Edwin yeah I think I heard a raccoon you probably did okay all right hey Edwin yeah there was a noise outside okay I think it was raccoon uh-huh do you agree yeah yeah I darted up and looked around my room but I saw nothing the next morning Edwin dropped his coffee cup when he saw me. He held up a nearby mirror and I saw myself. I had a large... I had a large dash in my left cheek.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

16411.212

It's like bigger than he is. It's like waddling over.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

16422.567

After I was rushed to the hospital, my doctor told me that I must have been sleepwalking, but then he showed me something that made my blood turn cold. He lifted up my shirt to reveal a sewn up incision where my kidneys were.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

16463.884

You already took the guy's kidneys! He took his kidneys and then cut him on the cheek so that he would have a plot element to be scared of before he then goes to the doctor. How did Mitch not wake up during any of this?

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

16503.94

dude i forgot i thought i hadn't heard this story in so long from what i remembered eyelash jack just kills you or something right i forgot about the kidney part that's great oh my god oh my god i read the next line i stared into his eyes mind widening you somehow lost your left kidney last night the doctor told me we don't know how though sorry mitch

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

16543.023

Oh, that's weird.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

16554.54

I fell unconscious and woke up in the hospital. My doctor, the same one who treated me before, entered the room.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

16591.15

The, the, the idea of the doctor, just like he's about to go tell him and his brother's dead. And he kicks open the door. Like, well, it's one of them. Good news, bad news. Okay. In the hallway leading to my room, I saw Edwin's body.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

16623.102

I looked at the thing I had picked up and nearly vomited. I was holding my stolen half-eaten kidney. Yes! Yes! With some black substance on it. Oh, yeah. Oh, yes. Yes. Oh, my gosh. That's so good.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

16676.333

Forever. That was rude. That was mean. Say you're sorry. I'm not gonna say fucking fuck you. I'm not gonna say you're sorry. That was me. Hell no. Hell no. Okay, I'm changing my will that if Hunter does that to me, I'm putting a bomb somewhere in his house.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

16702.222

You're putting a bomb? Good God. That's more reasonable than what I was talking about last episode. If you tie me to a random corpse and put me in the ground, yes, I'm putting a bomb in your house. Without hesitation.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

1672.055

I had this whole thing planned with the lights. They were gonna go out, and I was gonna pit her around. I was gonna do a bunch of stuff, but I can't be bothered. Him and Marcus drive away together, the creature and Marcus. It's, I don't know, a ghost...

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

16723.63

Well, I'm going to start learning. What's going on in roommate? Okay. Yeah, whatever. All right. Stumps. AVI. Five minute long video where a man with no legs is attempting to break dance on a DDR mat. And what looks like. I'm sorry, Hunter. Is something funny? Is there something you want to bring up?

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

16756.935

The phrase, the word attempting is pretty funny.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

16768.326

Yeah, nothing. Nothing, sorry.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

16815.26

Wordlessly, the man raised a shotgun, placed it against the boy's forehead, and blew his head off. I'm sorry, Hunter. Is something funny?

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

16853.251

okay sorry when you all get mad at me for picking stories that involve like tommy taffy-esque themes or boroska themes or whatever remember this is what i'm working with okay this is what i have to keep happy this is let me tell you shovel that was adult content into to get something out of

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

16915.002

Okay, audience, the reason this is funny is because it's so over the top.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

16951.954

How good is that? So good. Bro, I think my skin is moving. Oh, my heart. Oh, it's so good.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

16972.644

What monster? Are you talking about the monster that got her in the dog kennel? Oh, stop. What are you talking about?

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

1699.906

What are we, some kind of suicide squad?

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

16998.533

I like the word juicy being applied to me in any respect. What are you talking about, man? That's a compliment. Juicy? I don't know about that. My wife said it. Maybe I take it as my big, juicy lips. I didn't feel like a compliment.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

17016.029

that this the day of the dead thing is infinitely important the whole attraction she's hot thing is window dressing the fact that she is there for scanners and then wants to see day of the dead she is going from cronenberg to romero that is a prize that is something he needs to get a hold of just advice for my boy windigoon my boy windigoon bricked up I refuse to stand at this point in time.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

17046.595

When I first met my wife, when we were friends, it was right before Halloween, and she was like, oh, we're having a watch party for all the Michael Myers movies, all the Michael Myers Halloween, do you want to come over? And I was like, oh, you're having it? She's like, yeah, I love all the old slasher flicks. Like, done. Here we are. I'm like, that one's not getting away.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

17073.729

ring a ding ding you said the magic words you're saying it like a jesse pinkman voice i asked again and she replied there's a man at the door then 10 seconds later and a woman at the bottom of the stairs all right hunter let's role play you're in this scenario what's what's what's step one

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

17108.632

120 seconds. Holy shit.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

17156.236

of the house is lost I'd kiss her on the forehead and I'd say hasta la vista baby and I would just open the window and scurry my fat ass out there the hey hey is really funny eventually like something really unsettling however you're like yo yo hey hey yo hey hey No, no. Faye was irritated that I'd done this without her permission and waited outside while Kay set up.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

17180.828

Dude, if my wife was doing this and then she was like, I'm just mad that you got holy water, bro. I'm tying her in duct tape and dropping her off at a nunnery.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

1720.07

I was like, cave and pregnant. And then I'm like, oh, wait, I did that. Yeah, that was me.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

17220.356

I was like, what do you mean? Oh, she did it like the priest. That's weird. I was gone three weeks ago. Yeah, my ass is in Maui right now.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

17252.716

And then licked my face.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

1730.575

Yeah, it just follows me around. See, now that I was able to pass on the curse to you all, and specifically you, Hunter, I just have pleasant memories of Boroska. What a nice little story. Psychopath. Yeah, psychopath, yeah. Marcus seems surprised by that.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

17338.429

uh her mom laura admitted to me that something had happened to faye as a child at the cabin what up what a bitch i would i would be like you know what you're going in the same house with her i called you over this in confidence and you lied to me you knew something was happening and you lied to me you kept this for me this is my life and your daughter's life sorry i have to admit something but something did happen to faye as a child why did you tell us

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

17364.699

yeah what the fuck i literally called jamaica he does this for two reasons uh to work on his art commissions and to make sure faye doesn't stab everyone to death and burn the house down in their sleep hey hunter if i just called you and was like i have to go on yeah no no because your house would be a vacated i'd be a maui with a pina colada Wasted away, get a margarita.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

17403.062

At the end of the pipe was a simple shower head aimed down towards the ground.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

17409.488

you know yeah that's awesome yeah yeah it's pretty good you know that feeling when your stomach drops in this case i think mine literally did because i vom oh that was that was the story what oh no i'm just listening oh i'm sorry i thought you thought i asked you know when your stomach drops like uh like i personally was asking you that wasn't part of the story

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

17442.469

That was too good because I kept reading the words on screen and you're like, yeah, oh yeah.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

17455.08

Wow, Isaiah, good point. I never thought of that.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

17481.441

Son, you need to go tell your mom not to come outside. I'm going to be busy with Rocky for a little while.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

17525.426

The Flesh That Hates?

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

17527.728

610, I think. Yeah, The Flesh That Hates.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

17541.397

Yeah, no, I know that one.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

1755.561

Yeah, the detective's like, what do you think happened to your sister? And the boy's like, I think a skinwalker caught her.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

17552.426

Sometimes the dog's acting kind of funky, and you got to know it in the biblical way, if you hear what I'm saying, Bob.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

17577.1

Nah, I'm good. Yeah, let's go with Starkill. Alright, Starkill. It does look exactly like... It says virgin anus. doesn't it look like vagina anus i think what it is is it's virginia nuss probably because you know they name it off of like where it was discovered virginia's probably virginia yeah virginia's this is the worst case this is the stinkiest and worst case of a vagina anus i've ever seen

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

17623.082

Is that you, Mr. O'Connor?

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

1763.904

I don't know why you thought that, but... I was just going to say someone, you know, pretended to be your mom. What are you talking about?

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

17646.249

Officer, I don't see what the problem is. If we're going to eat animals, then we might as well. Like, he's doing all, like, the Twitter justification for it. Oh, my God!

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

17690.88

Where's Rocky? Don't worry about it. Don't worry, boy. Why don't you go ask your mother?

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

17706.081

sorry I've not been in touch guys it's been a busy month however I'm pleased to announce that as of yesterday night I finally touched down in Phoenix Arizona I'm posting this log from my first American hotel room which offers a gorgeous view of both the state hospital and a local prison auspicious times drop me a line if you're in the city or if you have any information at all

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

1774.068

Yeah, home invasions are pretty common. What is a skinwalker? I know Clancy's a kid, but there's still no level of Clancy. Like, there's the whole, wait, where do you know about skinwalkers or whatever? But I mean, like, even when I was a kid, jumping to supernatural conclusions, if an adult went along with me, I'd be like, what?

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

17744.917

I had to align all of my chakras to get that out, okay? I think it worked well. It worked very well. Sad part of me realized that this was the closest thing I'd had to a friend in almost a decade. I found myself looking forward to the discussions we would have after each meal. I'm laughing because, in a sense, you are my parasitic twin that I read to. What do you mean? I was just reading that.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

17777.779

And it was like, I would read to him. And the part where it's like, sometimes it would talk to me. Yeah, sometimes.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

17798.243

I was a big lipped, big lipped Hawaiian shirt. There it is. There it is. And the twin could control fire. And also, yeah, there you go. What was a little, a little punk. Sometimes I'd have to stop and explain an event to them, but most time they just listened quietly and waited patiently. That's so you. Afterwards, we would discuss our feelings on the book. What we thought was going to happen.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

17825.55

It's just the Creepcast origin story. The next one's great. A sad part of me realized this was the closest thing I had to a friend. Yeah. I found myself looking forward to our discussions. I didn't mean to ruin it, but I think I just did. Oh, well. It's great.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

17846.684

A lot of people have commented on this story being like, I would assume a title like this would be like some weird gay conversion thing or something like that, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's what you kind of the train you're expecting it to go down. But I don't know where this story is going to go, honey.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

17861.928

I don't know where this story is going to go.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

17870.59

That is a wild accusation.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

17885.908

yeah the eradication of abnormal sexuality like smacks of the pulpit yeah you know and also like you have to kind of transport yourself back this is 12 years ago right so oh yeah i guess we should have said that uh it this is posted 12 years ago so it's been a while yes by user uh wreath By the way, R-E-A-T-H-E, so for credit.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

17906.58

We were going to mention that at the beginning, but at the end, I mean. Oh, you did?

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

17912.365

It's just that whenever you start talking, my brain just kind of zones it out and quits paying attention because I don't care.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

17945.999

Oh, her uncles are dead? That's weird. Hey, have you heard of skin men before? Yeah, exactly.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

1795.655

I was talking about a movie I watched the other night.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

17963.443

We were joking, but we hit the nail on the head for help I Don't think so what about Barasca? Yeah, Sam does doesn't give a fuck about letting them fly like out there.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

17992.296

can thought forms be created in a manner that would benefit american society and help keep american citizens safe that that is so funny to me the delivery on that where it's like so after finding out this earth-shattering information we asked the question can this benefit the u.s government

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

18020.71

How can we thought form an A-10 Warthog to smite our enemies?

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

18033.098

i am currently thought forming a fleet of kamikaze violence to rain down holy justice on those who have wronged me that's the power of that form that's the power of thought for whatever this next part because you said dress partially do you think you're like and then they're like that's what we bring in the velociraptor

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

18058.457

this section is it's like i really want you to think about a dinosaur yeah bring back the dinosaurs it's like it's like a five-star general standing next to the chair like i want you to think about a lot of dinosaurs all at once i need you to think about a long neck with a rocket launcher tapped to his spine can you think of that for me mister unit 13 needs you

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

1808.66

I should have a parent right now. Where's my dad at?

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

18086.869

And also while you're at it, if you have the time, can you think about an eight foot tall copy of Gwyneth Paltrow that has a triple M chest?

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

18111.074

And she also doesn't understand what love is, and she thinks that romantic interest is the same as motherly interest, and she thinks I'm her son. You'd be better.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

18137.252

Please. Thank you. Just combining all of her movies into one character. But also, everyone else doesn't see it, so I don't have to deal with the repercussions.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

18156.864

Actually, you know what? Scratch that. Robert Downey Jr., eight feet tall, huge rack. I'm never going to kill this guy. He knows too much.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

1817.643

I should call the police. The police are zombies or something.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

18210.367

And if you're going through the hallways and you happen to see an oiled up Kim Kardashian that's nine feet tall and thinks I'm her dog, ignore it.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

1823.344

They're all plant people. It's just me and you, child.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

18246.574

There's nothing to fear but fear itself.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

18284.708

I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm thinking about the visual of a general, like a Sam Elliott type, just as the machine's turning on being like, but also I want her to be like 5'6", 5'8". Definitely not over 5'8". And maybe also if she could smell like...

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

1829.585

Against the world now. Do you want me to show you where vampires come from?

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

18337.187

If you could make her maybe a little bit upset when she comes home from work in the evenings, and that's understandable. But after a time of comfort, she likes to be held and release her frustrations in a healthy and respectful manner. That causes us as two people to grow closer together over time. That'd be great.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

18392.833

Also, if you could give her one arm, but the other one's an oven mitt.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

184.314

Ladies, I want you to imagine that your mom dies, and then at your funeral, your boyfriend walks in wearing a suit that doesn't fit him and goes, what's wrong with you?

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

18443.843

And oiled up as well, please.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

18462.25

Yeah, he walks in like, whoa, this isn't anything like oil in Iraq. Who did this? Who is this? Who the hell is this?

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

18510.374

oh god you faked the painting you are really painting those wonderful pictures he's he has to be mentally gone real quick fellas he's playing it way too fast that that kind of move that's like after your your first or second confirmed date you don't trick a girl into showing up with friends the friends aren't there and then you're trying to hold your hand way too fast

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

18539.404

No, no, of course not. That's the third day.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

18544.169

He's playing it all wrong. You cut a hole in the... Yeah, yeah, yeah. You get the dune popcorn bucket. Perfect. What'd you expect? The theater had long closed so I only had one option. I told her that I was going to go behind the theater to piss but that I'd be back in two shakes.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

18562.122

It was obvious that I thought it was hilarious and she seemed to laugh more at how funny I found it than at how funny it clearly was.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

18570.505

I'll be back in two shakes.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

18593.64

I cannot find the name of the person so I apologize whoever the author is probably writes elsewhere so the Gregory 88 was like oh let me do a fun little Twitter ARG so it was something they were kind of doing off the dome you know and then I think they wrote themselves into a corner right like they get near the end and they're like ah they were asking themselves a lot of the questions we were like well what does the thing look like what does it do what Isaiah what

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

1865.063

Clancy's like, this is just like Hogwarts. Marcus is like, dear God. Good God. You're not a wizard, are you? Like, what, Marcus is just an equally delusional old man who, like, also thinks media's real? We're gonna need to call Nick Fury on this one. Like, it's just... You have to say you... To your girlfriend's father. Exactly. That's a great idea.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

18713.304

I guess I'm just, I guess I'm the bad guy. Isn't that right? Oh, what, what are you? What are you going to go to the hospital? Like it's visibly leaking down. You're like, are you going to go to the hospital again? Let me enjoy my weekend.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

18751.078

Gin, baby, don't let her bother you.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

18775.397

Fuck you! The phone's not even... The phone's not even plugged in. He's just like...

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

18790.313

You want Uncle Eric to come over? you got a, you got Jenny, baby. You got yourself a room that smells like cookies.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

18843.172

I'm just a big old bug in the house. That's what the house wants me to be a bug. I guess that's what they want. Speaker 2 in his house. My buddy keeps getting eaten like a bug in his house. Speaker 3 in his house. Speaker 2 in his house. Speaker 3 in his house.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

18859.121

Speaker 2 in his house.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

18873.923

I bet, yeah, I bet you've been to this hotel at the second store. Are you Jen? I think, are you Connie? Are you my wife?

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

18884.846

Connie, I told you Jen's coming. Go away. Jen's going to be here soon.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

19038.556

Yeah, he like, he's like, he like comes up to the house. He's like, is this what you want? Is this what you want from me? And like the house just like sinks into the ground really quick.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

19072.362

The police show up and he's like, this house thinks it's better than me. This house thinks that I'm not good enough.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

19112.62

I'm going to pay the house to eat you like a bug. Return of Sweatsuit Man. This is the next day. Friday, October 29th. Yes, he's back again. this time he has a vehicle.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

19357.782

i should be working jen in her head is like i hope he's doing okay she pulls up and he's dressed like a giant penis he'd be gone for six days eric what the carly i thought you were dead Oh, I'm blending in so it won't find me, Connie. Yeah, he's like standing by a tree. How could you see me in the garden? You don't think the house can see me, do you? If it sees me, I'd have to leap me like a bug.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

19391.008

Have you ever seen a two-story Victorian house walk around here, Abby? every house he passes he like hides he's like you can't be too sure with these things oh god okay we have to continue yes so after that he exited sherman way and headed east then i got stuck at a light at the north ridge med center and lost him again I just kept driving and looking.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

19426.313

I thought, I'm sorry, I'm just imagining a naked guy in a green suit driving a car, trying to be low-key.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

1943.28

I cannot wait to meet your parents and in-laws. I have so much to tell them. Oh, gosh.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

19553.201

oh man I want to go to bed um editor was reluctant to go back we all were but he knew he had to why does he have to why does he need to call the police what do you mean well we will after we do our edit because we're interns the editor leans around he's like we have to go back could be a dead child could be a photo of a dead kid you know

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

19583.832

I also want to mention that in the last episode, upon watching the upload, a lot of my impeccable Jeff Goldblum impression was cut from the final level. And I equate that to the burning of the Library of Alexandria. I think that is perfect art. that should not be tampered with. So, this is your warning.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

19607.103

I am going to insert it into any location I can through this story and make it impossible for the editor to catch all of them, okay? Because I'm mad and will continue to be mad.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

19633.183

I think there were literally like 20 minutes of me sitting here talking in a Jeff Goldblum voice that never made it. Just me going, could be a dead child. Could be a dead child. Me and my son Benjamin. Yes!

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

19679.912

You mean the hat store? Glasses, you say?

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

1970.483

I went to the website. It's one of those bot chatting programs. I think it's best if I just let the conversation speak for itself. Hello. Hello. Who is this and how are you able to control my computer?

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

19741.791

This is an imaginary room, Tiffany.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

19765.194

Hola, Tiffany. It's me.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

19781.43

He's like wearing a sombrero.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

19800.335

He keeps asking me for salsa.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

19805.879

Dr. Redacted, I think it is the Macho Man Randy Savage character from the Tommy Taffy Creepcast.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

19819.568

But actually, if they think about it, the way that Hunter and Isaiah cleverly bounced off of the trauma in the episode for good comedy really highlights what Creepcast is all about. And I think they should get over it.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

19837.694

Even, Dr. Redacted, even the fact that it's a story and they should grow up and get over it.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

1985.214

Right. Forgot you're a bot.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

19853.056

Right. And maybe, Dr. Redacted, the audience should lighten up a little. Dr. Redacted, Isaiah and Hunter are trying their best.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

19872.512

That's right, Tiffany. That's right.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

199.586

What? Did someone die around here or something?

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

1990.278

Listen, I know whoever's screwing with my computer can see my screen right now.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

19926.622

You ever cut a mouse? You ever cut a mouse? Jim likey. Whoever edits this, if you remove any of my Jeff Goldblum impression, I'm going to break something, okay? Let me have it! Thank you all so much for watching. Thank you for checking out Greylock and Bully Hunter about whatever I told you to bully about in the comments. No, no.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

19954.296

There is one thing I want to get off my chest before we start, though, that mostly I feel like you'd appreciate. I was in the city this weekend and some girl runs up to me and she was like, oh, my gosh, are you that guy from Creepcast? Not Wendigo. That is nice. Not Isaiah.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

1996.161

Yeah, yeah, and I'll wager that you're one of those IT kids who thinks he's tough shit. You know what you're doing right now is illegal, right?

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

19970.541

that guy from creepcast that guy that guy you're the guy who does the jeff goldblum impression right yes yes now if she said that i would have been thrilled i've been like that would have been up that i would have actually quit the pot i would have been like okay i'm done i'm actually done i would have been like that's right that's me no she wouldn't know that because the editor keeps cutting it the creep tv was the most the most the jeff goldblum impression got out because caitlyn wasn't allowed to touch it

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

20002.235

enjoy it while you could because it's the last time you just had an incredibly long detailed description of why you shouldn't be here at all there's bad spirits they're from the mind get away save your wife and you're like well i guess i'll camp out here another night i mean they put hold on

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

20042.161

No, you're not cutting anything out. You're leaving all that. You let me have this. You know how scared I am right now? Oh my God.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

20049.084

Oh my gosh. You're right about the next line. Sometimes she would struggle, but usually she would just go along with her head hung low. What a job. I'm watching this woman get periodically kidnapped to this trapped room every day. It's like, Oh, that's kind of funny. That's a little weird.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

2006.407

No shit. Are you familiar with the terms invasion of privacy? Get off my computer, kid.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

20072.064

She always looked peaceful and happy when she was painting and seeing her that way, smiling serenely from time to time, as she got something the way she wanted it. It always made my day. She is totally going to paint something like, help me. Yeah, yeah. Or it's going to be like a bloody face or something like that. Or like Jeff the Killer painted. Yeah, yeah.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

20108.277

I guess I'm just a little cuckoo for Cocoa Puffs. The lady just looks at you who's watching and it's like, oh, what if I'm painting Jeff?

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

20121.874

You think I forgot? You think I forgot about Jeff? I'm just Wade. I don't even remember where we were at. There we go. Okay. As long as you gave it the treat it wanted, you would be not only saved, but rewarded. That's assuming that you're in control of the negotiation, which I feel like is a misstep.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

2014.994

Cool story. Anyway, I'm calling DPS. You picked a bad time to screw with me, kid.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

2021.618

What is this voice?

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

2033.945

Okay, whatever. I'm just going to keep going. What?

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

2039.868

Majora's Mask?

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

2043.35

How did you know about that? because because what? I did it did what? I played with you what the- what?

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

2058.247

who is this? Bing the statue? you're inside my computer now? yeah how?

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

207.432

Did someone else die? Okay, well, what's wrong? Oh, her? You've had like three days to know about her. Why are you crying over it now?

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

2074.278

If you're so powerful, why use a ridiculous website like this to chat with me?

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

2084.623

I like that. You think it's funny?

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

2091.466

Why are you letting me?

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

2097.549

Window closes. Do you want to explain what that voice was you were doing? It's chat bot, dude, or clever bot. I've never heard clever bot. Does it sound like that?

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

2109.011

yeah shut up i hate you i'm in the middle we are at the end of this story we're gonna keep going okay bid called me to clip are you bored i'm not bored i just know that you're you're gonna derail this i just know you're gonna derail this he tells me anyway we're back to clever bot What is it? What's the point of playing? I die whenever I do anything.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

2147.35

What are you talking about?

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

2151.092

I can't, bro. Part of it's exacerbated by you, admittedly, but... Exacerbated by my question, she said... Oh, yeah, sorry.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

2179.93

She's like, why don't you just talk... Why don't you just talk about the goddamn balloons if they're so interested? No!

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

2205.654

You and your shark pool float have been here for 30 years.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

2215.375

When you play a character, you're temporarily possessed by that character. I followed him to a black jeep sitting at the edge of the parking lot. We jumped in just as a loud bang echoed across the asphalt. God only knows what it meant.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

2235.63

Huh? Hunter. What? Just read the sentence at the end of this paragraph.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

2261.678

Okay, maybe, maybe, maybe we now, maybe part three is supposed, maybe it's like Army of Darkness. Oh my God, wait.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

2314.876

In the first couple parts of the story, we mentioned how time changes around it. And it has been mentioned twice now that I am significantly older than you. So the audience cannot put those two factors together. So I will now explicitly say that I am precisely eight years older than I should be due to time differentials created by the demon.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

2515.1

I didn't think too much of it at the time. I figured it was probably a kid from one of the other houses trying to mess with me, so I took it off the door and tossed it in the fireplace.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

2575.316

Well, look, all I'm saying is every forest that I know, every self-respecting forest has the pagan child, right? That runs through the forest and leaves stuff. And I suppose burning their gifts is, you know, an appropriate response. I always just kept them, just like put them up in my house. I thought they were cool.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

2609.826

We gotta keep continuing because I'm gonna get- Let's put it this way. Let's take a step back and kind of observe the story so far. This person's a grad student. We'll call him Greg. Greg is a grad student, right? So he's like, he's going through school, probably doesn't have that much money.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

2627.773

Maybe like not really a strained relationship with his mom, but not enough that his mom's willing to talk about her father. Right. So he's probably not that well off. And then he suddenly gifted a house that he could probably sell for like a quarter million. Right. Countryside. Nice house. Stuff like that. Oh, dude.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

2644.787

He can't just walk away from that. Right. He has to do something. Absolutely can.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

2688.092

Okay. Well, I'm going to be sympathetic for at least... He hasn't lost me at this moment. At this moment. He's lost you. To you, he's chum.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

272.662

Yo, they got free drinks here. Let's go. Yo, Kimber. Yeah, he's like across the deal. Yo, Kimber, they got tea. They got iced tea and cookies. Do you want some? I know you said it makes you bloated if you have it too early, but can you have it now? I know you're worried about stretch marks, but if you want some chips ahoy, let me know. I know you're like fat and all, but these are pretty good.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

2735.769

that's all i got i i i have nothing i have nothing but hate in my heart okay well now now out of necessity i have to be a greg defender that's fine because if we both if we both hate him this is just gonna be mean so i've gotta come to his head you have to wear that cross i have to bear that cross yeah okay so the guy who rightfully so burned the pagan artifact says right by the next morning i'd pretty much forgotten about it okay he's lost me

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

2763.925

After that sentence, he's lost me. What do you mean you forgot about it?

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

2773.532

No, no, I can't. I can't do it. I can't do it. I have to stay on his train. I'm Greg Defender. I would forget about it too, I guess. I thought about getting in my car and just going home, but I felt like that would get me in trouble. There's all sorts of property tax stuff I don't understand. I felt trapped. Okay, you can leave.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

2794.386

You can leave the house and still pay property taxes if that's your issue.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

2832.349

Sure, Greg, whatever you say. It is getting across the idea that Greg's kind of dumb.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

2843.657

Okay, a lot of dumb, not kind of dumb. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I don't think he'd make any noise.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

2854.494

yeah just like he would barely move at all damn slenderman makes you do all the work He probably just stands there and, like, looks down. Okay, I don't know. He just stands there and looks down.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

2906.285

That's got you hung up. Doesn't it? Do you expect Taylor? Do you expect slender to be a good lover?

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

2932.408

But then you told me your job was being relocated. What is going on?

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

2939.071

These two absolutely insane people. Yeah, exactly.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

2949.558

Well, maybe they're taking turns having these paranoid fits.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

296.861

I guess you can have one.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

3006.467

also just like i'll say this i know at least a dozen guys who would commit unspeakable crimes for jessica just like she just has the just the phenotype that in absolutely insane men would kill themselves over i can't explain that in a rational way but someone knows what i'm talking about dogila So I'm walking around the car with my night vision on. Like, there's nothing out here.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

3036.176

I can see everything. There's nothing. Put the helmet on. See for yourself. And she was like, I'm just scared. So we set up with her crying until sunrise and then drove home. Oh, my God.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

3060.68

No, what I should have done is I would have been like, I'll go find it. And then I just don't come back. Yeah, don't come back.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

3075.126

Dude, I think she would have divorced me. Oh, 100%, yeah.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

3082.51

Yeah, there's no way.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

3166.597

Marcus didn't let me finish. He pushed my hands away from the phone screen and hit play on the recording, interrupting me. I'm sorry.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

3203.251

exactly what i was thinking like all right here we go i am he who walks between the here and the there i am like like 2000s f 2000s fx like action movie dialogue you know like hell boy oh god it does i admitted feeling the color in my face draining little by little as i listened

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

3303.737

I can't, if this isn't, to those listening, if this doesn't, like, if you don't realize why this is so funny, the dialogue goes, it is a kid who just met this man, who keeps saying stuff like, it's a predator, one that can't be stopped, one too powerful, and the guy goes, it could be a top predator, and the kid goes, and let me guess.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

3327.348

you can't let that happen, and then the guy goes, we can't let that happen.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

3359.781

Yeah, the kid, after hearing all this, hearing that his sister burned to death a few days ago, was killed by a skim walker, the kid's like, all in due time.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

3513.088

oh gosh this is the greatest this is the my favorite thing we've read on creepcast this is the best this blows out of the water this blows out of the water so much this is so good i can't oh my gosh oh god i'm i'm oh my god wait wait wait wait look i asked after a few moments of heavy silence pretty much marcus

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

3546.886

Oh, hold on. Let me get back in my chair. Let me get back in my chair.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

3557.474

And let me tell you. Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. Where are you at? Dude, I thought you were joking. No! I wasn't looking at the screen, so when you said, I'm the one they call when shit gets spooky, I thought you were making... That is a legit, this is, this is quotes.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

3622.261

My note was something like this.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

3674.539

Go ahead. Let's write it down. Go ahead. It's not a joke.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

3719.444

Hey, Hunter, who do you want to die first, your mom or your dad? Probably my dad.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

3730.965

Oh my gosh. I was expecting like some level of like, yeah. Oh wow. Why would you ask that or whatever you're like?

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

3743.728

I'd been morosely looking at job listings for the last few days, but this was the first one that stood out if only because I was bored and it was weird. So I sent an email.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

3763.832

Yeah. That's how emails work. I put, um, I, I at youtube.com when everyone knows when you make a YouTube account, you just go ahead and make your domain youtube.com. It's true. Yeah. Oh, Oh, Oh, what's this? Hold on. Hold on. We have, we have the name of the woman who's trapped in a room. It is Hunter Hancock. Now isn't that strange? That's a weird.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

3788.407

Every time I'm at a level, you're like five levels past me. And not in a good way. That's not a problem. You should be worried. Mom, why is your email on this website?

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

3804.085

your entire this story's about you but there's no job and you just trap your mom in a room for no reason i'm gonna have you make me a peanut butter sandwiches all for the rest of your life some kind of thing between you and your mom because last episode you you were like burning hell you old goat or whatever like is there something you want to talk about or you know what dude me and my mom

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

384.742

Okay, cool. What happened to her face? Oh, yeah, the concrete. That's right. Well, you should have put a mask on her or something. My God. Yo, who else thinks we should bring death masks back? Anyone?

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

3909.591

i know we're youtubers at all but we gotta lay off no okay all right all right veronica was in the fourth grade and was probably the prettiest girl in the school even as a six-year-old what'd you say say that again i just i just said yeah Oh, no, you better be careful as a 47-year-old man. Yeah, I know, I know. How to get out of any social event. Yeah.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

3948.909

A couple minutes before the movie started, a group of girls walked in. They were all pretty attractive, but whatever beauty they might have had was eclipsed by the girl with the dirty blonde hair, even though I had only caught a glimpse of her profile. As she turned to move her...

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

3977.735

You better hope it says she's 19. The 42-year-old woman walked up. Oh, thank God. That makes her only a couple decades younger than me. Just a couple. I'm still a cradle snatcher. She turned to move her seat. I caught a full view of her face, which gave me the feeling of butterflies in my stomach. It was Veronica. Fuck. What? I thought it was an older chick.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

4015.244

Yeah, alright.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

4019.446

I goofed. It was a goof. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That YouTuber slipping out of you. No, no, no. Quick, someone check his Twitter DMs. No, no. Wait, wait, wait.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

4032.271

I saw her. She was alone and she was beautiful. Every time.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

4055.82

Oh, brother. Ladies even? Get it out of here. Ladies, ladies, ladies. Who called in the smoke show? In fact, it's about time I wheeled her out. Fair warning, Ms. Sharma. She's a thing of beauty. To Rob Gathard, beauty took the form of a dark green Jeep Wrangler. Rob climbs in. What did you say?

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

4111.399

It was a good car. It was a good car.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

4114.85

yep rob i like how you make that noise if it's jeeps or questionably young women in stories oh my god oh good god this is just oh oh my word stop noting i can't do it rob climbs in and lets it roll out of the garage where it dominates every inch of the driveway Car- Stop. As soon as I read the word- Dominate me. As soon as I read the word dominates.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

4167.587

Jamie and I hung out inside the house and played my Nintendo 64 while we flirted pretty outrageously. Hot. how old are these kids 26 i think bases covered man these kids on bicycles building ramps playing n64 thank god they graduated college eight years ago yeah they're gonna look like whenever you're flirting playing nintendo 64.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

4200.731

was that what kind of what kind of shenanigans you were never you were never like in high school playing games with the girl you liked some of the boys maybe it's my turn it's my job stop it stop stop stop that's how i You do, you do that thing when like you're playing a game together and then one of you is like beating the other and you're like doing the, like the shove thing or whatever.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

4230.411

Sure. Yeah. That's probably what's being described here. Yeah. There's a lot of this going on, you know, you're tickling me. I don't like, I'm not going to describe anymore. Cause you're going to do it. It makes me uncomfortable.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

4254.564

I'm going to keep reading. Good Lord. There had been an unspoken sort of mutual attraction throughout the summer that no one had the guts to act on. Stop moaning. Half an hour later, Apollo shows up. Though he laughs about his ordeal, he's clearly a little shaken.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

4292.185

I imagine, if I had where he said Apollo Creed, I imagine actually, oh, he just passed away. You know who I'm talking about? The actor. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I imagine actual Apollo Creed shirtless in his American, like, American flag trunks and boxing gloves. Oh, yeah. Like, stepping out of the car and you're like, that guy should call himself an Uber.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

4320.106

Again, this was never an issue, as I was usually in another state by the time the next semester rolled around.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

4328.736

I've heard the phrase ham it up, but I've never- I've heard ham it up, but I've never heard anyone say, I am a honey roasted ham.

CreepCast

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Me, I'm known as the ham around these parts.

CreepCast

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You just gave me flashbacks to a really funny story. So I haven't heard the name Jacoby in years. When I was in the sixth grade, I remember, so like, I was like, Christian kid. I was homeschooled for a few years in elementary school. So like socially in like the, or sorry, seventh grade, I wasn't like up to date with like other guys my age.

CreepCast

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So I remember I was at a sleepover and the other guys were talking about girls they thought were hot. And I was like, I thought girls were pretty, but I never like... I was never, I'd say, like, physically attracted in the way that, like, most teenage boys are until, like, eighth grade, right? So anyway, seventh grade, they're asking me, it's like, oh, who do you think's hot?

CreepCast

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So I made up, I literally did the, she goes to a different school thing. So I made up a girl, and I gave her the name Jacoby, because I heard that name, and just, like, just picked a name out of the aether.

CreepCast

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and i was like yeah she's she's really hot she goes to different school so for the rest of seventh grade those because they immediately saw through it they were immediately like this guy's never spoken to a woman what are you talking about they made fun of me constantly and they they knew that like my parents were like like religious and stuff so they kept being like i'm gonna tell your mom that you said a girl was hot or whatever i'm like no

CreepCast

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please like i'm not a girl like don't tell my mom i like girls please she's real i swear my girlfriend's name's steve wallace when you said the name jacoby it shot spikes through me because i haven't heard that name and for a brief second i'm like don't tell my mom no no please don't tell her i like women she's real anything she's real i swear

CreepCast

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It's like the shirts that Jesse Pinkman would wear in Breaking Bad. They've got all the Thrasher font that says live and die. It goes down to his knees.

CreepCast

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4513.763

It absolutely is.

CreepCast

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4518.487

I swear I met a girl named Jacoby, which is why that thought came to me. And Jacob is in the name! It's basically Jacob with a Y. It's basically Jacobi. You're like, wait, that's not a girl's name. Okay, but there's like a button, like, okay, you have Alex, and then you add an IS, and it's Alexis. It's a girl's name now. Like, there's a ton of names like that.

CreepCast

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She's very attractive. While we're on this, I remember the other guys would, like, told the girls in the class, like, hey, he made up a girl that he thought's pretty. So, like, the girls would bully me. They'd be like, oh, like, what's Jacoby look like?

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I literally, I was so scrawny and weird in seventh grade that I...

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4576.372

this is i am increment i'm like i said the pain medicine don't hold this against me it became regular yourself such a hole you're like i shit my pants there was an empty trash can on the way to the uh to the bathroom at school and if i passed one of the like eighth grade students going to or from the bathroom without saying a word without like making a fuss about they would just pick me up and put me in the trash can and just like

CreepCast

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I WANT TO PICK YOU UP AND DUNK YOU IN A TRASH CAN. THIS IS WHY I PREFACED THE PAIN MEDICINE, OKAY? BECAUSE I KNEW IT WOULD BE... I KNEW I WOULD OVERSHARE, OKAY?

CreepCast

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Where are we at? Yeah, yeah, so her mom's dead. Kimber's mom's dead, I think. She's dead. That's all we need to know. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Roll credits. As we waited for the service to start, I can't detach the image of Kyle in the corner just eating all the sandwiches.

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THAT WASN'T MY LIST.

CreepCast

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4656.405

I do like tall women. I've always liked tall women. Okay, so maybe I did say she was seven feet tall. Maybe that's how they saw through it. I don't know.

CreepCast

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My friendships were often fleeting. Okay, you're the one who said Jacoby, this is your fault. If you've used any other name, none of this would have happened. I'm sorry, I didn't know. What is this podcast?

CreepCast

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4732.316

And I go, no, it's not. And she gets right in my face and goes, yep. And then just doesn't say anything else to me the whole time. That's all. That's all. She just, she just wanted to do that. Okay. And I felt, I felt attacked. I felt assaulted.

CreepCast

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No, it was not a test. It was a test. That was an attack on me.

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And that you said, I feel like. i feel like you did this that was an agent of the devil you are the devil i have no idea why i chose to do that but it was fun giving into the strange impulse not to break the droning hum of the soda machines at least for the moment i do get that have you ever been like a really quiet place and for some reason you're like i should i shouldn't make a lot of

CreepCast

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4810.603

I more so get it in nature, like when I'm outside and not for like, oh, I don't want something to see me. Just like it sounds so calm that I'm just like light footsteps. Like I don't want to disturb the peace, so to speak. And I could get that in like a more industrial area of kind of like it's so calm here. Why ruin it? I remember being a kid. We went to like a really big church when I was a kid.

CreepCast

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And sometimes when I'd go downstairs to the bathroom, there were like these long, long hallways around the church, like in the basement area. And it kind of had that like, you know, the fluorescent hum thing. And I remember just standing out there sometimes and thinking like, man, it is so quiet. Like you can hear so much every little detail. And I kind of get not wanting to disturb that. Right.

CreepCast

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Yeah. Yeah. That makes sense. Almost not of like a fear thing, more of almost like a social cue, weirdly.

CreepCast

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4868.479

When I opened the envelope, I understood. There was no letter.

CreepCast

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4875.941

Well, the next line says there's something in it, so we'll see what it is. Okay, all right, I'll hold my tongue for a second. Yeah, she didn't just hand him a blank envelope like, loser! Oh, sorry.

CreepCast

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4898.052

Jimmy, you had the picture of the man touching himself, right? Give it to him. Make him feel appreciated. No.

CreepCast

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4927.128

The Japanese are good people. Good manners. But they got all these urban legends and ghost stories that Hiroji was crazy for. Spent all his free time chasing them down. Like, you heard of Jorigumo?

CreepCast

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4949.144

I'm sorry, but with that delivery, I imagine like a bewildered elf.

CreepCast

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4964.862

Well, she's the spider lady who lives in the Joro Falls around Izu. Your southern accent with this is so good.

CreepCast

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4988.433

He's one of them educated types. He just talks too big. Okay. Anyway. Before I was rudely interrupted. I'm sorry, I'm sorry. With a criticism over my Rob speak. Like I don't understand the character.

CreepCast

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Well, she's the spider lady who lives in the Joro Falls around Izu. Meant to be real pretty, but real dangerous. Rouchi took us out there to get a picture of her.

CreepCast

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5028.493

Okay, that voice. I don't mean to keep... I can't... You know that, like, the fairy from Legend of Zelda? It's like the 50-year-old man in a fairy costume. You know what I'm talking about? Hey, come on, man. No, I'm a cute girl.

CreepCast

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5045.602

Okay, in my head, it's that... It's that... Is Tinsel its name? The elf or whatever? I don't know. I have no idea. It's that, but trying to sound like a British woman. Okay.

CreepCast

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5062.761

Nah, she didn't show, none of them did. I didn't believe at all until we went to... Aokigahara. Sure. Aokigahara. Aokigahara. Aokigahara. Wait. Aokigahara.

CreepCast

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Listen, little missy, I don't even think that you're real. I don't know what you is, but it ain't right.

CreepCast

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5094.442

No, I don't see now you're whispering, and that makes me all kinds of bothered and uncomfortable, and I don't stand for it, ma'am. You done got me riled. That's it. I'm getting my gun.

CreepCast

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Oh my gosh. He's just listening to like Impractical Jokers way too loud.

CreepCast

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5119.284

I thought I couldn't pronounce it. Now you can't pronounce it. What's this about, you little educated British lady?

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You think you're all sophisticated better than me just because I'm from down here in Phoenix. Well, let me tell you this. You think that it's fine for you to mispronounce it, but when I mispronounce it, it's because I'm some dumb yokel. Is that right?

CreepCast

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Well, that ain't quite Christian of you now, is it?

CreepCast

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5167.361

I thought about it. I was thinking London. You're from London, right?

CreepCast

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5218.392

This is it. This is his middle break. I can't wait.

CreepCast

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All I can do is hold on to my recollection of the night before, reminding myself of the sense of calm, finality that radiated from Klein when I confronted him. All I can do is trust that I made the right call.

CreepCast

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Thank you for not doing it as Clyde was walking off last night. Yeah. Did the thought come to you? Be honest, did the thought come to you to do it then?

CreepCast

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5307.574

like in that moment so in my head the like i don't know about you but uh to me bristol slash alice looks like um the actress who plays her in the tessa thompson in my head like it's tessa thompson the moment you spoke in that voice it became like peaky blinder cillian murphy like

CreepCast

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532.924

Hold on, to make it easier on us, you want to alternate paragraphs? Sure. Sure, like substantial paragraphs. Like if it's a sentence, then you do another one. Sure, sure, yeah. Yeah, that way it's just more rhythmic or whatever, and neither of us are losing our voice. Because we're in this for the long haul. This isn't a sprint, it's a marathon, right? We've got to pace ourselves.

CreepCast

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Just like transformed.

CreepCast

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5357.136

Yeah, well, she didn't ask.

CreepCast

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5362.062

Glad you made it too. They build them tough down in London. I rest my head back against the luggage.

CreepCast

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5375.929

Of course. Yeah, of course. That's, uh... Sorry. Hey!

CreepCast

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5483.438

Do you know what the perineum is?

CreepCast

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5487.582

It is the space between your butthole and your other thing.

CreepCast

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5545.247

Ben, I think we should go. I'm getting nauseous. I would punch him in the face.

CreepCast

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5565.331

Hey pal, at least these are less expensive. Am I right? You can get eyeballs in the backyard. Ain't got to spend the check on the misses the old ball and chain. You hear? Yeah.

CreepCast

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5590.367

You can't get over that price from pay less shoes that, that receipt she brings home. Am I right? Put her, put her there.

CreepCast

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560.722

look i'm not i'm not saying i was there or anything but from what i've heard it got pretty wild what i heard it was a pretty good race is all i gotta say a lot of upsets that day all right

CreepCast

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5602.371

I'll tell you what you think. You think eyeballs are bad. How about some eye Balenciaga on a receipt? You're here. Yeah. I'll tell you what. I looked back at her in shock and saw her grinning madly, her fingers clutching a large shard of glass. You alright in there? I hate Chris.

CreepCast

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5636.979

I thought those shoes were bad, buddy. Anyway, let's get you. Oh, man. Anyway, you all right in there?

CreepCast

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5650.408

She's right behind you, isn't she?

CreepCast

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5656.11

she's right behind you isn't she it's like chris you can see you would know that you're looking at me you are looking at me right now oh yeah yeah she's behind you um erm ben you're gonna want to see this lynn had crawled completely out from under the bed and stood in the bedroom doorway her face twisted in rage her whole body was visibly tense blood ran down her fingers and onto the floor

CreepCast

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5725.002

Hey, look, it must be that time of the month or something going a little crazy.

CreepCast

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5731.305

Hey pal, don't we all got them? Oh, I see some blood on her hands. I know what that means. Hey, they all get a little wacky. They all get a little eyeball. You know what I mean?

CreepCast

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5745.152

Chris was standing in the front yard talking on the phone with the police. He's on the phone like, um, she's right behind him.

CreepCast

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575.185

at the oh we forgot the thing thank you for the likes and everything on audio platforms keep it up thank you for the support on the show it means that's true let's get into it see i remember this stuff 100 listen on spotify listen on spotify listen on spotify listen on spotify listen on spotify listen on spotify apple apple apple apple podcast listen to spotify apple podcast thank you

CreepCast

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5769.064

Bring us a glass of wine and a weekend vacation, if you know what I mean. The woman's going a little stir-crazy over here. Look, I'm just saying I've said things in the bedroom. Oh, my God.

CreepCast

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It doesn't look that that is fine. It's when you bring it out and we all have to look out at that. It's like, you know. Oh, sure. Like, don't do that.

CreepCast

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5853.599

So that, sure, I'm tracking everything you just said, except for what relation is that to the bedroom?

CreepCast

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5862.893

In the best... You're saying I do the whole salami sandwich eating thing as a mode of foreplay. Yes. Okay. Yeah. So if I'm Scooby, then who is Caleb?

CreepCast

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5877.705

I mean, that makes no sense. That's the natural conclusion, I guess.

CreepCast

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5912.587

Our foreplay is just like Hanna-Barbera cartoons, kids. Not even with the sexual undertone. It's just like the jokes from cartoons.

CreepCast

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5940.73

I put my feet off the bed and run in place like I'm driving a car.

CreepCast

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5957.022

That was pretty funny. After removing my fleece and lying down for just a moment, I end up sleeping in the clothes I'm wearing. At some point, I'd walk up to Rob and be like, Rob, we gotta kill her.

CreepCast

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5992.045

She's just weird like that. She's vibrating, speaking Latin behind the scenes. All right, so do we have to go home then or what?

CreepCast

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6005.275

She does this. I don't know why you're being so weird. It's that time of the month. She gets like this. She talked to a demon. Who cares? God. You know, I really thought when you were being Alice just said that you're going to go, Rob, you're going to want to see this.

CreepCast

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601.088

If you have epilepsy, I want you dead right now.

CreepCast

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6038.353

Yeah, yeah. Rob, she's right behind you. Yeah, all right. Okay. In a minute, there's going to be like a thumping in the closet, and then Marcus is going to go, Clancy, you're going to want to see this.

CreepCast

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6064.963

Room seven was close. I knew the demon was right behind me, but for some... What? It's right behind me, isn't it? Oh, God. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

CreepCast

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6079.649

I know. If it gets worse after this, I did it. Yeah, that's it. I just need to call someone. I'm going to go outside. And then there is, assumedly, a breakage in time. Well, that didn't work so well. Well, that didn't work so well. Well, Irm, that just happened. Well, that didn't work. Okay, I'll keep that out of the story. It doesn't deserve it yet. It might later, but not right now.

CreepCast

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a t-shirt that when it moves it strokes yeah exactly as an led is like this old blood battery pack in the back of the car our next merch strap is is it's a flashlight that says creepcast and its only setting is like whatever the perfect tune is to cause seizures there you go it's just i think that's good that's good quality merchandise is what i would say

CreepCast

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6122.316

That's what gets him distressed.

CreepCast

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6132.063

While inspecting the flesh pyre of Satan, I have the feeling I'm being watched. me thinks me being watched erm he's right behind me isn't he yeah spoke to me in my own voice the first thing he said was the hole will fill with snow and blood so yeah that amped up my fear quite a bit So, yeah. That amped up my fear quite a bit. Yeah, that amped up my fear quite a bit.

CreepCast

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6165.203

I'm not going to let it deter me. I'm going to say it. I'm going to say it. Faye, it's right behind me, isn't it?

CreepCast

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6188.844

Oh, did you get a special Polaroid from a musician?

CreepCast

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6223.283

maybe bro i'd have to i i i think for a very long time i was like this is just fake i might have pitched it i don't know no bro if you still have what if it's real what if one day like what if one day when you're 87 years old you know 10 years from now could you could you like listen to yourself could you imagine huddle if you had an adam sandler signature

CreepCast

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6259.186

Okay, well, for one, you're making fun of me for the signature thing. I'm saying it would be cool. If he sent a signed copy of the CD to someone who became a famous internet comedian personality, right? That would be a cool stepping stone. You hear about like, oh, this director got a letter from Scorsese when they were a kid or whatever, right?

CreepCast

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631.075

I'd buy it, you know, cause some car wrecks, just stand on the side of I-75 and pointed a tractor trailers to go by.

CreepCast

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6384.478

The implication. That physically hurts.

CreepCast

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640.824

Get arrested. Get arrested immediately. When I get arrested, I'm just like, uh, it's a merchandise? Oh my god.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

6409.219

That is an all-time creepcast quote. That's really good. My mother spun around from the stove and I saw her visibly tense. She didn't like Tommy touching us. I know where it's going. I know where it has to be going. The 18 content warnings tell me where this is going.

CreepCast

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6442.987

I would be thrilled if he dropped an anvil on one of the kids.

CreepCast

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6449.73

That would be, that would hit like a drug at the moment. It would be awesome. But no, we don't get that. No, absolutely not. I thought that if I could make him want to impress me, he would agree to go looking for the lost town. What a bitch. I mean, this is like standard high school stuff.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

6469.803

I mean, like, sure. It's rude. But I mean, like, there's a bunch of girls in high school. Like, oh, that guy likes me.

CreepCast

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6482.528

How many girls in high school and stuff like that? Like, you know, they try to like get a guy to like them for like social cloud or like, cause he's like big on the baseball team. Like they don't actually like him. They just want something out of him. Right. It's like, it's, I think it's a fine part of being a kid.

CreepCast

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6496.665

Now, when you're an adult doing like serious relationships off of this, it's different negging.

CreepCast

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6524.247

What you just did is just mean it would be like this. It'd be like, yeah, you look a lot better today. That's that's just kind of similar to what I did. No, no. The different, it's saying you look really good for a fat girl. It's totally different. First off. I didn't say that. I'm saying that that's the example of what someone negative, I'm saying, but it has to be manipulative.

CreepCast

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6551.367

If I say you look better today, you're like, thank you. And then maybe you're later to like, oh, did I look not good the past few days, which is what the incentive, the underlying was. Oh, so just saying you look pretty good for a fat girl. It's just like, what are you talking? What?

CreepCast

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Right? Little deal?

CreepCast

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6669.938

it's like a police chief giving a briefing in a hurricane this person had found him and was hurting him i broke out in tears he was my only friend next to boxes okay all right hold on hold on man you can't he was my only friend next to boxes

CreepCast

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668.477

I've seen some people dreamboat over you. I don't know what you're talking about. Oh, whatever, dude. I sent you the fan edit that was talking about a certain kind of choo-choo train, if you know what I mean, that involved both of us. Okay, dude.

CreepCast

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Come on. Well, my friend's getting touched and murdered by a stranger upstairs. Good thing I've got my kitty cat. Well, I hope that I can find my cat so I still have one friend.

CreepCast

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6727.351

He gets on the walkie. Hey, Josh, did you hear that? Boxes has eight more lives. Yeah. Hey, Josh, are you there? Josh!

CreepCast

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6817.157

Look, pal, if you're hiring some tall guy to come in here and pull our job, buddy, we're in the union, all right?

CreepCast

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6837.65

He did say that he thought the deer did it. He said that... It read.

CreepCast

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6848.253

He said at first, I thought it was a deer they were seeing, but then they all swore it looked like a tall man.

CreepCast

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686.529

Completely zoom past it. Okay, go ahead. I was smaller and less energetic than most kids my age. While they preferred to run around and play outside, I chose to stay inside and read.

CreepCast

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6871.188

Look, that guy ain't my crew. That guy ain't my crew. So if you have some other crew in here, you need to let us know, all right?

CreepCast

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6926.491

Like, it's like you used to work in retail. Like, it's just a common thing every crew has.

CreepCast

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6939.753

Not an expert Mesoamerican archaeologist, if you ask me, but he does have some history with, like, runic examples of the ancient, you know, lost tribes dating pre-12th century. So, you know, he's all right. He knows most of the edges.

CreepCast

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7018.165

A classic high school prank.

CreepCast

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706.582

Okay, I did do that because I was a wimpy kid. I wasn't sickly, but I was very small, and I was also sheltered, so I did read a lot. His lips are far too fat. Well, guess what? All those guys who are outside playing, they probably work at like Staples now or Cracker Barrel or something. And guess who has a YouTube channel? So, you know what? Look at that, Chad.

CreepCast

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7098.872

But the chances of her painting that name when I was working here, I didn't want to be silly, but I wasn't trying to be too. What's that word? Mom used to say it. Okay. Oh, God. No. Mom used to say it when she read her angel books. No. Whoa.

CreepCast

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7120.406

That is. What? Whoa. That was so. Yo, that was wild. You. Okay. We made the joke. Ha ha. Mom said it was an angel. And then the story says, quote, Mom used to say it when she read her angel books. skeptics that isn't the oddest thing though what's odd is that everyone has hyper realistic eyes yes oh my gosh oh i forgot about this okay so hunter some lore right

CreepCast

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7152.08

Every single, without fail, every single video game, movie, TV show, whatever, creepypasta would have some mention of hyper-realistic body parts. They're like, she was stabbed to death and a hyper-realistic heart fell into the screen or he was shot in the head and hyper-realistic blood splattered across the wall.

CreepCast

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It was just, that's what all the time implying that that's supposed to be the uncanny aspect of these like cartoonish world, real human eyes in sponge. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Good. We're just sits there in silence blinking for about 30 seconds. Then starts to sob softly. He puts his hands tentacles over his eyes and cries quietly for a full minute more.

CreepCast

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7212.513

i imagine he puts his hands in his face it's like this was one of the most terrifying stories to children online by the way keep that in mind The eerie part is that this sound, Squidward sobbing, sounded real. It was like it wasn't coming from the speakers, but that speakers themselves were holes that the sound was traveling through from the other side. Yeah, that's how speakers work.

CreepCast

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7255.716

It's almost as if the speakers weren't speakers, but instead holes that sound is projected out of. As good a sound as the studios like to have, they don't have the equipment to be able to produce audio of that quality. The deleted animation editor paused and rewound frame by frame. What we saw was horrible. It was a still photo of a dead child.

CreepCast

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726.435

It looks like the nerd gets the girl. So, check me out. What I was laughing about while I was reading that is I imagined that meme of the dragon that's like, while you played your sports, I studied the literature. While you played your sports, I studied literature.

CreepCast

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I miss this kind of thing. Because every other one I would read back then, like if there was a cartoon I watched, I'd read a creepypasta and it'd be this like random dead kids or blood or something. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. He couldn't have been more than six. His face was mangled and bloody. One eye dangling over it. Popped.

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He was naked down to his underwear, stomach crudely cut open and his entrails splayed out beside him. He was laying on some pavement that was probably a road.

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that was probably a road it's a pavement that was probably a road yeah it's a picture of a dead kid and someone in the back's like is this a road or a sidewalk quick we thought it was a basketball court but we're pretty sure that it was a road at first we thought this was a lake until someone pointed out no that's pavement actually no that's not water that's pavement that is in fact pavement we can't confirm

CreepCast

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And it's just for a single frame. Oh, my God. The most upsetting part was that there was a shadow of the photographer, but no crime tape, evidence, tags or markers. It turns out this man wasn't a police officer at all. Yeah.

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And then the guy taking the picture turns around the camera and it's the Ben statue. You want to know why I killed this kid? The angle was completely off for a shot designed to be evidence. It would seem they were the person responsible for the child's death. We were, of course, mortified, pressed on, hoping that this was just a sick joke. Yeah, that's what I like to do to my workplace friends.

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Display images of children I killed.

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7414.696

Well, I was playing. Where's Dan Schneider?

CreepCast

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7418.119

Like, as a Dan Schneider, Brian Peck thing, it's funny to imagine them like, I was just goofing around, you know?

CreepCast

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This is just what guys in Hollywood do, okay?

CreepCast

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7437.834

We just have some pool parties with 14-year-old girls at our house, throw some dead kids onto sets, and then do some cocaine. That's part of showbiz, all right? There now would appear to be blood running down his face from his eyes. The blood was also done in a hyper-realistic style.

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He was confused as to why he had been called down, so the editor just continued the episode. Once the next few frames were shown, all screaming and sound again stopped. Squidward was just staring at the viewer, his face taking up the full frame for about three seconds. The shot quickly panned out. That deep voice said, Do it! And we saw a shotgun in Squidward's hands. Ha!

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Yes! Oh my god, keep reading, keep reading! He immediately puts the gun in his mouth and pulls the trigger.

CreepCast

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There is an investigation due to the nature of the photos. Nothing came of it. No child seen was identified.

CreepCast

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it's just funny there was an investigation due to the nature of the photos but nothing came of it it's just like you know those photos the most interesting part yeah we nothing really came of that you know those dead kids well don't worry about it we're on to the next part no child we didn't know what the fuck happened there who knows it doesn't really matter yo that was weird josh had really coveted it so much so that his parents bought him a slightly nicer one for his birthday which was toward the end of the school year immediately josh is a rat

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yeah and also like the story opens saying that this the rider is like from a lower income yeah exactly like he has this one little thing to hold on to he has a rich friend to come over small snow cone machine for christmas and josh is like i need more i need i need a better a small snow cone machine for christmas to be like what a fucking out of season gift dude

CreepCast

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And you're just, I'm tired of the, I'm tired of this lip thing. Do you know how many I've got so many DMS and comments about like man lips, this guy, this YouTuber is really cool. I wish I could see him over the lips.

CreepCast

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Then, a familiar voice broke my tension. John. This is Amy's voice, just so you know. Yeah.

CreepCast

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I like saying John, just like John. John? There you go. was a single word in Amy's voice. I breathed a sigh of relief.

CreepCast

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Every character, every character we have in this series, you love to make just a toddler.

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Speaker 2 and Speaker 3 all right. So the story had me, I was like, I was there. I was in the room. I was imagining like the kid blue. I can't remember their name that whatever character it was from south park who sold the steroids to Jimmy for the special Olympics.

CreepCast

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swell up like their description of me is just like a giant pair of lips and it's it's gotten to a ridiculous degree and i'm kind of tired of it honestly so i can't stand you i can't anytime you say something to me my comments are that for a week straight so Stop.

CreepCast

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Oh, you did a really, really bad thing. He's a kid. No, this sounds like this is mocking. This is some level of deep down sarcasm. I'm not going to stop you. I just want it to be clarified to the audience that I'm not with him. I don't. I'll do a different voice. Now you're in my head.

CreepCast

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What's a better... Why don't you give me an example? Give me an example of what... For your audience, then maybe you can act like it. That's all I'm saying.

CreepCast

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7780.347

Say, oh, you did a really, really bad thing. I'm not the voice actor, so I'm not the one to ask about this.

CreepCast

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7795.126

If that's what you think our audience deserves, then you go with it.

CreepCast

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78.305

When we went inside the church, we saw that Kimber wouldn't have to do much acting to convince people she was having a breakdown. We found her at the back of the room, tucked into a chair and a puddle of curly orange hair and tears. Kyle sat next to her and pulled her into a hug. Kimber, what's wrong? I kicked his foot and shot him a look that said, really?

CreepCast

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Well, you know, like I said, if you think that's what the audience deserves, then that's on you. I'm just letting the audience know that I'm not in on it. Alright. I cried, not wanting to spend another second in this awful room. I could hear a woman screaming down the hallway, her cries rising as something meaty pounded into her. Oh, ugh. Spooky. That just came out of nowhere.

CreepCast

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That was like a... Well, that was uncomfy all at once. Yeah.

CreepCast

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7850.163

I wasn't laughing at that. I was laughing at like the story had none of that.

CreepCast

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7860.39

It could be just like in the Tommy Taffy story where when something was going on, it was a WWE game. Yeah. Yeah. yeah it was a tombstone pile driver yeah yeah the wind house let's get into it let me start by saying that peter terry was addicted to heroin god damn what a what a opening sentence just like me If this is like super graphic, I've set myself up for it. I don't think it is.

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I don't think it is.

CreepCast

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7912.676

There was probably like a hot, tall woman in there somewhere.

CreepCast

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7924.11

thank god there she is she was known for her dark lipstick and fishnets and i just like 13 year old me he's like yeah brother fishnets a typo negative shirt you're like a tall glass of water

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Yeah, yeah. Although it would be funny to watch you struggle through it.

CreepCast

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7955.473

There it is, yeah. That's right. What did I say? Is that your Wendigo impersonation? What would you do if you did my voice?

CreepCast

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We'll see what they have to say about it. My commune with the heavens has ended and I've returned to the cold, unforgiving earth. It doesn't welcome me back. I hit the slope.

CreepCast

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Yeah, I mean, if she, like, had glide time... I'm gonna guess... To have that kind of... Yeah, I'm gonna guess she lives because the dead deer break her fall.

CreepCast

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8016.221

Yeah, she's gotta break a bone or something. At least, right?

CreepCast

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802.601

I had to park almost... Isn't Crystal Lake the name of the Friday the 13th? Camp Crystal Lake, yeah. Okay, yeah, yeah. I thought so, just making sure.

CreepCast

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8028.005

Is that me? Is that what you're doing? Is that me? Is that my voice? Stop that. Cut that out.

CreepCast

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8036.868

Hey, no, I don't like the direction. It's funny when we're making fun of the British people.

CreepCast

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8058.393

Why did you say drowning accident just then? Been drowned. Okay, all right, all right, all right. I forgot that was the title of the story. That's the title. I forgot that was the title of this story because this story does go to a drowning being related. And I was like, there is no way you just pulled that out of the air. You had such a fucking Poindexter point there.

CreepCast

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Oh, okay. He flashed a crooked smile at me and asked what I was looking for. And immediately I noticed that he must be blind in one of his eyes. Imagine finding that. What, just seeing that in your house?

CreepCast

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If I saw that in my house randomly, I'd be like, oh, I guess Hunter came by. No. You would have a million percent.

CreepCast

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8134.561

Every time you do an impression of me, it's a different part of the country. It's either like Kansas or like Florida.

CreepCast

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8152.873

Is that what I sound like to you?

CreepCast

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8163.118

Am I just a stupid dairy farmer?

CreepCast

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8167.56

What the heck is that? What the heck is that? If I wake up one day and there's a Meat Canyon cartoon and I'm in it and I'm like, oh, what is this all about?

CreepCast

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like jason just becomes a slasher for like none of the character setups matter or anything just just beautiful beautiful beautiful writing all for it to be a uh friday the 13th fanfic bro that would be hilarious that'd be such a good break it would be a pretty good way to even if it's not friday the 13th like it gets to the end of the story and it's just like um And then a creature appeared.

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It wasn't a bad life, but I can certainly see how it made me into the introverted person I am today. I took comfort in books and I experienced the world through them. Go ahead. I heard that laugh.

CreepCast

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I can't describe what it sounds like, but it makes me mad. I know, I know. I'm sorry. It's such a cartoonish version of your voice. It's not that we think there's going to be something great beyond the passage. We just like the idea of being the first humans on the face of the planet to set foot in a virgin part of the cave. Although if we found a hidden treasure, that would be fine with us.

CreepCast

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You got to throw the hidden treasure stuff in there, right?

CreepCast

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8274.782

Like gold or something? Oh yeah, you come across a chest.

CreepCast

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Yeah, these kids don't know. Kids with their TikToks and their iPhones looking for pirate treasure.

CreepCast

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8308.62

What has this country come to?

CreepCast

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8312.862

Back when I was a kid, you go out with your buddies and then Jerry gets bit by a copperhead and he died out in the woods like a man. Now what? You get hooked up on dialysis and live for 40 years? Yeah, exactly.

CreepCast

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8331.39

You and your buddies go out there, you find your dad's moonshine bottle and you make some mistakes. Like good Christians. You don't tell nobody except your assistant pastor, then you don't go to that church no more.

CreepCast

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There are some happy accidents. That's what I tried to tell the assistant preacher. He got me out of that church. As a matter of fact, he threatened to register me with the state of Illinois. So that's why I told the family we were moving out of Detroit because the business was gone in the region. That's why we're down here now. But look, I'm just saying that that is the kind of hard.

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No one wants to work anymore.

CreepCast

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8384.698

My head's like, what does that even mean? And the other half of my head's like, just don't think about it too hard. All I'm saying is that if it wasn't for the liberals running this country, we would have real men built on work like that. That's all I'm saying.

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8435.719

Oh, you're saying how many like murders never got reported. Sure. Yeah.

CreepCast

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8444.513

I mean, I'm sure, I'm sure that kind of thing happened. I mean, there are plenty of stories of like, I mean, look at the number of missing kids back in like the, you know, 1920s on. Right. It's like, okay, not all of those are actually missing, you know. Right. Right. Like a few of them had to be like, oh, Johnny, you want to go, want to go on that rope swing today? And Bob never comes home. So.

CreepCast

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The creature appeared and killed everyone. Like, you just, like, run into the dirt.

CreepCast

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8466.438

Kind of scary to think about, huh?

CreepCast

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8479.408

Hunters, is there something you want to tell us?

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8484.153

Anything that happened to you, Hunter? I like how when I don't do the bit the way you want it, you do the bit yourself and pretend to be me on the other side of it.

CreepCast

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8505.576

Man, that is a lot of heavy things that I'm sure Sam cannot unpack. Yeah, especially for a 16-year-old who works at a sandwich shop. Yeah, so they say mayo is the sauce of the aristocrat.

CreepCast

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And Cal's like, what was that? He's like, I just wanted to give him something to thank on. Yeah, don't worry. He's totally bought. That's what Sam would say.

CreepCast

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everything's perfect get some every time yeah okay hold on not to jump the gun i'm i'm drawing a connection between this and the pool float in my head right anyway um there's a you want to explain how you want to explain how well that a pool float is a is truly the balloon of the water right so

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Write it down. Write it down.

CreepCast

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8584.874

uh so the the idea is that strangers like send in like he said people were sending pictures of landmarks and stuff so it's people like oh well i'm from here this is what it's like i would i would hate hate to see what some of these pictures were i i i have a feeling that this is a disaster project is what this is coming to be look like i said it was the 90s that wasn't it was the 90s yeah no one really kids were just flying into vans left and right that's how it felt

CreepCast

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I've got balloon floats. I've got shark floats.

CreepCast

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863.845

It's okay, Grandpa. So if you hit control and the mouse wheel, the words get bigger.

CreepCast

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I wanted her shirt so bad.

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People, it became a joke to go on two sentence horror and just like make something dumb with the word creature in it. Like, I almost felt like Christmas, except I've got no eggnog. Thankfully, I can just milk some more from the creature. The family enjoys their milk at the table. Little do they know it was harvested from my creature.

CreepCast

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Hey, chef. I called it to the kitchen. My meal began being produced by a creature.

CreepCast

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8729.907

hey chef yes chef okay yeah yeah you get you get the idea people just let's keep reading i just look we're almost done with this we'll get you through well yeah i want to get you done with this fucking eyeless jack bullshit real quick i need to read a couple more of these two sentence horror stories that i saw while i was searching i just i need to just put this out there they said the library was safe and nothing was here

CreepCast

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I think about how that was a lie as I sit here bleeding out from my missing arm.

CreepCast

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8764.021

Just me and you doing this for two hours.

CreepCast

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8767.143

No! No more idea!

CreepCast

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8780.942

I decided to go on a tour of the Ikea factory. Little did I know that I would find the creature that lays the Ikea meatballs.

CreepCast

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8798.815

Give me one more. Give me one more.

CreepCast

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8807.636

Like, Hunter is so privileged. This guy, he hears Eyeless Jack, and he's like, wow, I can't believe that physically hurt me. It's the worst thing I've ever heard.

CreepCast

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8822.722

Did he drive to Taco Bell to get a Baja Blast? Is that what he meant?

CreepCast

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Come on in. Have a seat, said the dentist who invented the electric chair. I hate you.

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Oh, I feel dirty. Oh, I'm sorry, everyone. If that's where... This is gonna be a super... Look, I'm banking on it. This is gonna be supernatural. It's not gonna go there. I shouldn't have sold that snow cone to that ghost.

CreepCast

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It was really weird and just totally out of character for her like I said, but I also found it kind of funny that she was being more playful and a little less serious. I shouted that I loved her and called her a weirdo. As I shut the door behind me, I heard her laughing.

CreepCast

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she makes the best pork roast doesn't she guys it's like she's like hanging from the ceiling like a spider yeah she's like chris scampering across the walls isn't her guacamole delicious oh man it's a delightful She's like, she's like, you just hear Latin coming from, she's not speaking it, but there's Latin coming from her. I want to take a quick break to talk about today's sponsor, Manscaped.

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The holiday season is here. While you're out giving gifts, it's best to remember to treat yourself as well. In particular, taking care of your South Pole, if you know what I mean. That was too much. And today's sponsor, Manscaped, is here to help. And you can put your groomed game on the nice list with Manscaped's Performance Package 5.0.

CreepCast

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The package has it all, from the Lawn Mower 5.0 Ultra to the Weed Whacker 2.0, Crop Soother Aftershave Lotion for things that need lotion, and the Crop Preserver Anti-Chafing Deodorant. The Lawn Mower 5.0 is as adaptable as it is stylish. It has a bright LED so you can use it in the dark and all of those hard-to-see places, and it's waterproof so you can use it in the shower as well.

CreepCast

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Plus, it has two interchangeable blades, one for a clean cut and the other for a more rugged, close shave. But that's not all, because with the Performance Package, you'll receive some free gifts. That includes a pair of their Boxers 2.0 Edition and the Shed 2.0 Toiletry Bag to keep all of your goodies in one place. So enjoy your holiday season in the cleanest way possible, thanks to Manscaped.

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Because right now, there's never been a better time to get in on this offer. That's because if you head to manscaped.com at the link in the description and use discount code CREEPCAST, you'll be able to get your Manscaped order for 20% off. That is right, 20% off and free shipping when you head to the link in the description and use discount code CREEPCAST to get in on this incredible offer today.

CreepCast

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Thank you all so much for watching the ad, and thank you so much to Manscaped for sponsoring the episode. And now, a word from Hunter. The nagging feeling that the day ahead will be one of bitter and immediate consequences. I mean, yeah, she's gotta walk back and be like, oh, Clyde's dead, by the way.

CreepCast

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Sorry about that. And I also was there and facilitated it, so that's me present.

CreepCast

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But don't worry, he wanted it to happen.

CreepCast

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Pog! Pog! Pog! She's writing in her notes as he's disintegrating. Chad, is this real?

CreepCast

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Oh my gosh, I'm so stupid. For those that don't know, I was just about to ask Hunter if he's seen Hunter's animation. Yeah, I've seen it a couple times. That that meme comes from. Oh my gosh.

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I had seen text on her phone while she slept one night and confirmed my suspicions. My life had degraded to shit and I had run out of options. Humiliated and ashamed, I decided death was my only option.

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That's a funny visual. You have like a Sherlock Holmes type inspector. Like 19th century.

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it's like he's getting pictures of his wife just like in the most unholy positions just absolutely just awful and he's like what could all this mean well i better sleep on it this case is nearly cracked about the clues yeah

CreepCast

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She's like, this is why I'm leaving you. And he's standing there in like the full like tweed stitched overcoat with the hat and like the pie. Sweating profusely underneath a duvet. A little ways away from the shed, I found this in the middle of a clearing. What is this? And we have a little Easter bunny looking thing. That's like, I mean, at one point it was an Easter bunny.

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Hunter, this hell you're in was constructed by you. No, no, no.

CreepCast

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Now it's like vines grown over it. It looks decayed and like paint chipped and stuff like that. But at one point it was like a little cute bunny decoration.

CreepCast

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Oh. You want to come say hi to everyone after that heart attack? This is going to be in the episode. Oh, it's just Hunter I'm talking to now. Oh, my gosh. Oh, say hi, Hunter. Hello. That was very, very funny.

CreepCast

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all right sorry about that anyway gosh it sent me because she i didn't hear anything then she throws the door open like it's time yeah easter bunny then it says i must have got turned around because i was walking for what seemed like ages

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gosh someone turned on a vacuum cleaner in the house and it scared me to death oh my gosh you need to figure out your house yeah i do i need to get my house in order well someone got right outside my door and turned it on so all i heard was Gosh, I'm just gonna... I'm gonna buy a shed and I'm gonna set up there and no one can bother me. There you go. That'll make me feel better.

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Now, I will say the image... Oh my gosh!

CreepCast

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9407.5

Every episode... You already...

CreepCast

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9423.903

Shut up. I can't work under these conditions. Okay. I'm freaking out. I'm freaking out right now. Not outside like room five, but actually outside. My eyes stung. I wanted to cry. Hold on.

CreepCast

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Kayla I promise you I heard it was it was plain as day it was like it was like knock knock knock like steps oh my gosh hold on I just I just saw it under the door I think it's my dog it's not my dog it's something with a wet nose Benny is that you yours

CreepCast

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Do not scare me.

CreepCast

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You do not do this to me right now. He's got his ears pinned back. Kayla? Oh, thank God. Is it her? Yes, it's her. All right. Oh, you want to show the audience your star pillow? Oh, Hunter can't see. That's a very cute star pillow. It's adorable. For a second, I thought someone was lying on the floor at her edge of the bed talking back to her.

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I'm like, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just tweaking a little bit. It's okay. I swear. I keep seeing my door. The dogs are locked up. It's not the dogs this time. There's like, it's just the way the door shuts. There's a shadow directly in front of the door. And I don't shut up. Shut up with your, whatever you are. Stop talking. Quit. Let me stop. You are, you're a loser. You're a little punk.

CreepCast

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That's what you are. We live in NorCal in a really woodsy town. So when you look at our bedroom window, there are tons of trees across the street.

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was i keep i keep the reason i keep pausing is i keep looking at my door losing my mind it was very dark but i'm fairly certain i saw a man walking behind the first line of trees he was too far away to be the one grumbling but it is very unusual to see anyone over there this time of night in fact i've never seen anyone there at night ever

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i'm doing okay the audience isn't here right now they're this is a recording all that i did was laugh at your recovery you talked yourself into memeing the dad i'm in my own health okay i'm in my own health

CreepCast

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okay i'm moving i'm moving the screen over to the right monitor so i can just keep it in my peripheral i'm gonna call my wife and be like do not open this door

CreepCast

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Can I do something really funny? Caitlin just messaged me. It said the two. Can you send me the two sentence horror story about the Ikea meatballs? I can't find it.

CreepCast

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Hello. You're on. You're on the podcast right now. You're on speaker. Okay. Okay. I'm just reading a story with Hunter right now, and I'm so scared I'm going to cry. So can you please, when you get home, not open the office door? Okay. Cause I'm, I'm so scared that like I'm shaking and I've goosebumps and I've, I've talked about you opening the door for two hours.

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Best of Creep Cast 2024

9672.703

Okay. Just, just please text me before something happens. Okay. Okay. I love you. Love you. Bye. All right, we're good. We're good. We're locked in. All right. Nobody knows who made it, what its purpose is, or why it's on the side of the tree facing into the woods. Rather than the side facing the house. I found all the supplies to make another one. Kayla. Don't do this to me.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

9711.536

i had the headphones on and i felt the whole house rumble at once which normally means someone shuts the door okay the gps says she's here okay whatever ma'am something just came in no ma'am stay ma'am stay as quiet as you can don't make a sound mommy mommy he came inside

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

9749.977

I tried. Oh, that was great. Oh, fuck, there's more. That screaming about his legs worked or whatever, you were nailing it. My last guess was that it was a mummy, but in the end, Josh kept insisting that it was a robot because of the sounds that we heard. What? Yeah, what?

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

9820.885

That sentence sounds like something you or I would say midway through an episode.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

9856.542

I'm glad. I'm glad you don't have like strong feelings about it or anything. Wait, let's go ahead and knock the rest of them out. Okay, man. If Kyle from Boroska was here, oh man, he'd be having such a great time.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

9881.05

Yeah, I'm definitely not holding up something to the camera for you to not be able to see. My wife isn't here to get me, so that one won't work. I already made a you're going to want to see this joke. It's right behind me, isn't it? Same thing. Something has to fall, so here's a pin. And then you have to make fun of my accent. You have to make fun of my accent. I think that's all of them.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

9906.697

All right. That's it. We can we can continue on. All right. Oh, my God. Hey, let's go.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

9929.402

Oh, fuck. It's such, it's a guy in a mask, but it gets me every time. I hate it. Such a basic jump scare.

CreepCast

Best of Creep Cast 2024

9968.109

Jump scare was still good. She didn't have to tell me twice. I really liked Mira and I hated seeing her like this. The front didn't end up being much better. I could hear Mira crying over the store's dated music track. Jesus. She's just, like, bawling her eyes out.

Criminal

Turtle vs. Toilet, a Monster in the Closet, and a Surprise Possum

2064.082

Hey, it's Liam from Decoder with Nilay Patel. We spent a lot of time talking about some of the most important people in tech and business, about what they're putting resources to and why they think it's so critical for the future. That's why we're doing this special series, diving into some of the most unique ways companies are spending money today.

Criminal

Turtle vs. Toilet, a Monster in the Closet, and a Surprise Possum

2081.029

For instance, what does it mean to start buying and using AI at work? How much is that costing companies? What products are they buying? And most importantly, what are they doing with it? And of course, podcasts. Yes, the thing you're listening to right now.

Criminal

Turtle vs. Toilet, a Monster in the Closet, and a Surprise Possum

2094.458

Well, it's increasingly being produced directly by companies like venture capital firms, investment funds, and a new crop of creators who one day want to be investors themselves. And what is actually going on with these acquisitions this year, especially in the AI space? Why are so many big players in tech deciding not to acquire and instead license tech and hire away co-founders?

Criminal

Turtle vs. Toilet, a Monster in the Closet, and a Surprise Possum

2115.835

The answer, it turns out, is a lot more complicated than it seems. You'll hear all that and more this month on Decoder with Nilay Patel, presented by Stripe. You can listen to Decoder wherever you get your podcasts.

Deep Cover

Episode 1: The Warrior

2502.576

I'm Sarah Cavanaugh and I'm originally from Rhode Island. I can see where in some ways it can fit this aspect of like this huge plan to get all this money. like this master plan or something. But I never thought about it like that.

Deep Cover

Episode 1: The Warrior

556.803

Come on. Push it, Liam, push.

Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin

Talking About Money Stresses Me Out. Can It Get Easier? (Listener Intervention)

116.143

Pretty much my parents. I've always felt like I could talk to them about money.

Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin

Talking About Money Stresses Me Out. Can It Get Easier? (Listener Intervention)

124.428

It's really just my college friend group that I feel like I can't talk to about this stuff.

Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin

Talking About Money Stresses Me Out. Can It Get Easier? (Listener Intervention)

132.27

I don't know. I guess just what I said before about not wanting to sound dumb or telling them that I want to spend less when we hang out or the fear that they might just hang out without me if I say that I don't want to spend that kind of money.

Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin

Talking About Money Stresses Me Out. Can It Get Easier? (Listener Intervention)

166.23

Kind of, actually. My freshman year college roommate and I were pretty tight for the first semester. But second semester, all of my savings were pretty much dried up. And he really liked to go out and eat and go on big trips on long weekends and stuff. So I stopped being able to do that stuff with him. And then we just kind of drifted apart.

Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin

Talking About Money Stresses Me Out. Can It Get Easier? (Listener Intervention)

185.566

No, I guess we never really talked about it.

Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin

Talking About Money Stresses Me Out. Can It Get Easier? (Listener Intervention)

217.483

Worst case scenario, my college friends stop inviting me out and stop including me in things like trips and fantasy football. And then I kind of drift apart from the friend group and then I get cut out.

Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin

Talking About Money Stresses Me Out. Can It Get Easier? (Listener Intervention)

251.021

No, no, no. They're great guys. They just all come for money and I don't. And, you know, we just have different financial resources and backgrounds and we see it differently.

Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin

Talking About Money Stresses Me Out. Can It Get Easier? (Listener Intervention)

280.365

Well, that's nice to hear. I like to think that and I think I know that, but thank you.

Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin

Talking About Money Stresses Me Out. Can It Get Easier? (Listener Intervention)

460.705

Um, thanks for the invite. That hotel looks really cool, but I'm trying to save some money right now for a bigger place. So it's just a bit out of my budget. Do you think we could try something a little cheaper?

Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin

Talking About Money Stresses Me Out. Can It Get Easier? (Listener Intervention)

499.295

Yeah, that makes a lot of sense. I think that if I could just find a good alternative, they might just go for it.

Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin

Talking About Money Stresses Me Out. Can It Get Easier? (Listener Intervention)

528.649

That sounds good. And I think you're right. I can start with something that's not so negative. Like instead of waiting to talk about money when I have to shut something down or suggest something else, I can ask for their advice on something.

Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin

Talking About Money Stresses Me Out. Can It Get Easier? (Listener Intervention)

542.494

Honestly, still a little anxious. Even practicing having this conversation with you made me nervous, to be honest. But having some pointers on what to say will definitely make it easier. So thank you.

Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin

Talking About Money Stresses Me Out. Can It Get Easier? (Listener Intervention)

66.524

Well... I get really anxious when I think about talking to my friends about money. I'm doing pretty well with my job and I have some money saved, but I have some friends who are making a lot more money than me and it's kind of created a few problems. They just spend so much money when we go out and I don't want to spend money like that. But I also don't want them to stop inviting me to things.

Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin

Talking About Money Stresses Me Out. Can It Get Easier? (Listener Intervention)

88.027

I know they're investing and I'd like to ask them about how they're doing that, but I just don't want to sound dumb. But I guess it all boils down to just not feeling comfortable talking about anything when it comes to money.

Pardon My Take

Dianna Russini On Coach Firings/Hirings, Brandon Walker On CFB, Who Is Under The Most Pressure Wild Card Weekend + Guys On Chicks

1773.045

I mean, it's still pressure from... There's always pressure from the city to win. And the team is so... This is the most talented Eagles team that... I've ever seen, I think. Whoa. Whoa. Shot at Jason Kelsey. No, I think most... Who, by the way, has another show? Shout out. I watched the whole thing. Good show.

Pardon My Take

Dianna Russini On Coach Firings/Hirings, Brandon Walker On CFB, Who Is Under The Most Pressure Wild Card Weekend + Guys On Chicks

1794.706

Yep. What's your favorite part? Um... I liked when – You watched the whole thing? Yeah. No, he had a nice panel. He had Lil Dicky, Charles Barkley, and Baldy on it, our guys. I liked when they were just – there was a couple bits that they did in the beginning and at the end.

Pardon My Take

Dianna Russini On Coach Firings/Hirings, Brandon Walker On CFB, Who Is Under The Most Pressure Wild Card Weekend + Guys On Chicks

1814.188

Yeah, that's what's up. No, they did like – I liked when they were just talking ball. Okay. I wasn't a fan of – they did a lot of bits that I wasn't a fan of, but I did like when they sat down.

Pardon My Take

Dianna Russini On Coach Firings/Hirings, Brandon Walker On CFB, Who Is Under The Most Pressure Wild Card Weekend + Guys On Chicks

1836.262

That was awesome. His wife was great. Yeah. Queen. She has a name. Kylie. Queen. Queen Kylie. What? What are you doing?

Pardon My Take

Dianna Russini On Coach Firings/Hirings, Brandon Walker On CFB, Who Is Under The Most Pressure Wild Card Weekend + Guys On Chicks

1849.471

I mean, there's just pressure to win in Philadelphia, but there's no job pressure, if that's what you're asking. Right.

Pardon My Take

Dianna Russini On Coach Firings/Hirings, Brandon Walker On CFB, Who Is Under The Most Pressure Wild Card Weekend + Guys On Chicks

2665.804

Correct. Yeah, it's crazy. He literally could not have been out of concussion protocol yesterday.

Pardon My Take

Dianna Russini On Coach Firings/Hirings, Brandon Walker On CFB, Who Is Under The Most Pressure Wild Card Weekend + Guys On Chicks

2675.047

It's crazy. I told PFT my panic level was at a 4 out of 10 yesterday. It's down to a 2 out of 10.

Pardon My Take

Dianna Russini On Coach Firings/Hirings, Brandon Walker On CFB, Who Is Under The Most Pressure Wild Card Weekend + Guys On Chicks

2684.549

Well, then a lot of people – because I got worried, and then a lot of people were like, he literally cannot be out of concussion protocol until Wednesday. So, yes, that is technically correct, but you won't – we won't know anything until Thursday because he has to practice a full day, and then the next day wake up with no symptoms, and then you're out of concussion.

Pardon My Take

Dianna Russini On Coach Firings/Hirings, Brandon Walker On CFB, Who Is Under The Most Pressure Wild Card Weekend + Guys On Chicks

2709.053

You want him to play. I know I do. This is what I'm saying. I want you to respect concussion protocol. This doesn't work. Yes, it does. This doesn't work. You like the Packers.

Pardon My Take

Dianna Russini On Coach Firings/Hirings, Brandon Walker On CFB, Who Is Under The Most Pressure Wild Card Weekend + Guys On Chicks

2727.348

It's not until Thursday. Wait, you told me yesterday it was a concern. But that's because I didn't know the rules. Sorry I was concerned of my stupidness.

Pardon My Take

Dianna Russini On Coach Firings/Hirings, Brandon Walker On CFB, Who Is Under The Most Pressure Wild Card Weekend + Guys On Chicks

2775.637

So what happens on, like... What would happen on Thursday? Are we getting an update today? No, there's no update until... We're still not in problem territory. You can't get out of concussion protocol until you practice a full day and then wake up the next day.

Pardon My Take

Dianna Russini On Coach Firings/Hirings, Brandon Walker On CFB, Who Is Under The Most Pressure Wild Card Weekend + Guys On Chicks

2817.481

I mean, it was just absolute rage bait. That's all. How long has it been? I think he did that tweet just for you. Maybe.

Pardon My Take

Dianna Russini On Coach Firings/Hirings, Brandon Walker On CFB, Who Is Under The Most Pressure Wild Card Weekend + Guys On Chicks

2838.754

Me too. Is Jordan Love okay? You say he's like the 10th best quarterback in the playoffs.

Pardon My Take

Dianna Russini On Coach Firings/Hirings, Brandon Walker On CFB, Who Is Under The Most Pressure Wild Card Weekend + Guys On Chicks

2844.78

Yeah, because all of the quarterbacks ahead of him have played good Super Bowl games, right? What? Jalen Hurts.

Pardon My Take

Dianna Russini On Coach Firings/Hirings, Brandon Walker On CFB, Who Is Under The Most Pressure Wild Card Weekend + Guys On Chicks

4365.825

That's not what I said. That's not what I said. You sound like memes. What I am saying is that actually, I don't know. Don't you need to? Can't you not clear concussion protocol until a practice day?

Pardon My Take

Dianna Russini On Coach Firings/Hirings, Brandon Walker On CFB, Who Is Under The Most Pressure Wild Card Weekend + Guys On Chicks

684.827

If you get Ben Johnson... 6 out of 10. That's such a lie. That's such a lie, and you know it. That's awesome. So if you get Ben Johnson 6 out of 10, you get Mike McCarthy, where are you at?

Pardon My Take

Dianna Russini On Coach Firings/Hirings, Brandon Walker On CFB, Who Is Under The Most Pressure Wild Card Weekend + Guys On Chicks

708.541

You'll be more excited than if you got Mike McCart. You're going to be excited if you get Ben Johnson. I want you to get Ben Johnson just because I want to see you walk back this take.

Pardon My Take

Dianna Russini On Coach Firings/Hirings, Brandon Walker On CFB, Who Is Under The Most Pressure Wild Card Weekend + Guys On Chicks

7418.756

That's not great. Big Cat's trying to play this game that he's huge. I just want Max. I am. I need the Eagles.

Pardon My Take

Dianna Russini On Coach Firings/Hirings, Brandon Walker On CFB, Who Is Under The Most Pressure Wild Card Weekend + Guys On Chicks

7426.681

I need him to beat the Packers. I need him out of concussion protocol. But he also really wants to troll me about Jalen Hurts. So it's Packer Dan.

Pardon My Take

Dianna Russini On Coach Firings/Hirings, Brandon Walker On CFB, Who Is Under The Most Pressure Wild Card Weekend + Guys On Chicks

7438.027

Thank you. It is a technicality. It's a bad technicality. It was impossible for him to get out of concussion protocol yesterday. But is that not a troubling technicality? No. He would have had to have gotten out of concussion protocol last week if he was going to – because he wasn't out of concussion protocol last week, he had to still be in concussion protocol Monday.

Pardon My Take

Dianna Russini On Coach Firings/Hirings, Brandon Walker On CFB, Who Is Under The Most Pressure Wild Card Weekend + Guys On Chicks

7482.037

He might have been concussed. I was just here. Oh, yeah. So PFT just is a constant state of concussion. No, we just hit guys hard. We play physical football. You said that, yeah, because you were still wearing sunglasses in the concussion.

Pardon My Take

Dianna Russini On Coach Firings/Hirings, Brandon Walker On CFB, Who Is Under The Most Pressure Wild Card Weekend + Guys On Chicks

7631.866

A lot. A lot. And that's sad. I was just abiding by the rules. I was obliging to the rules.

Pardon My Take

Dianna Russini On Coach Firings/Hirings, Brandon Walker On CFB, Who Is Under The Most Pressure Wild Card Weekend + Guys On Chicks

7936.505

I don't think it covers. I think it's just Jackson Holiday. Yeah, you're just naming him his name? And Jackson Holiday is also, he's a great prospect. Yeah, you might want to be. Lamar Jackson would be a safer bet. What if Jackson, like, it happens a lot, that good prospect. Yeah.

Pardon My Take

Dianna Russini On Coach Firings/Hirings, Brandon Walker On CFB, Who Is Under The Most Pressure Wild Card Weekend + Guys On Chicks

802.287

yeah Hank keeps saying this thing where it's like you've seen head coaches how often is it that a head coach goes to his third team and is more successful yeah because there's just as many instances as offensive coordinators good offensive coordinators being good yeah and going to a new team as there are head coaches going to another team yeah your whole thing of like yeah offensive coordinators going to a new team

Pardon My Take

Dianna Russini On Coach Firings/Hirings, Brandon Walker On CFB, Who Is Under The Most Pressure Wild Card Weekend + Guys On Chicks

825.783

Sometimes it doesn't work. Sometimes head coaches going to a new team also doesn't work.

Pardon My Take

Dianna Russini On Coach Firings/Hirings, Brandon Walker On CFB, Who Is Under The Most Pressure Wild Card Weekend + Guys On Chicks

889.865

Doug Peterson was a head coach that went to another team and did not work out for the second team.

Pardon My Take

Jaguars HC Liam Coen, Captain America Brady Tkachuk, We Enter Supreme Debate + Listener Submitted FAQ’s

2663.396

Yeah, it's a dream, man. Dream come true. Obviously grew up in this deal. Right. Watched my dad do it at a really young age. Grew up in sidelines and coaches offices in locker rooms. And I always wanted to be him. You know, I wanted to be him and to be able to do it on this stage with this opportunity. Can't can't thank Shad Khan enough for this.

Pardon My Take

Jaguars HC Liam Coen, Captain America Brady Tkachuk, We Enter Supreme Debate + Listener Submitted FAQ’s

2696.172

You were just drawing up, you know, the wishbone offense. That was that was that was real. I think that was probably, you know, dad push, you know, pushing that narrative in ways. But it was our passion. Like that was our shared bond. Yeah. It was football. It was sports. It was basketball. It was baseball. It was all sports. You know, that's been life at a very young age.

Pardon My Take

Jaguars HC Liam Coen, Captain America Brady Tkachuk, We Enter Supreme Debate + Listener Submitted FAQ’s

2716.388

And unfortunately for my wife, I don't have a lot of other tools in life. But football is something that ultimately I've done for a really long time. Do you use any of those plays that you drew up in your five? A lot of the wing T principles that we used in a lot of our 21 pony stuff with the two back and the gap schemes and some of the GT stuff we did with the misdirection.

Pardon My Take

Jaguars HC Liam Coen, Captain America Brady Tkachuk, We Enter Supreme Debate + Listener Submitted FAQ’s

2736.985

It was really a process from the wing T, which is what I ran and what my dad ran back in the day.

Pardon My Take

Jaguars HC Liam Coen, Captain America Brady Tkachuk, We Enter Supreme Debate + Listener Submitted FAQ’s

2752.85

Was that like, when did that happen? Like my senior year, I had a pretty, my elbow was shot. I was getting shot up every Wednesday to practice and Saturday to play. And so knew that was falling off. The cliff was falling off too many curveballs as a 10 year old. And it just wasn't going in that direction. I went and trained and Matt Nagy actually was training me at the time in Lancaster, PA.

Pardon My Take

Jaguars HC Liam Coen, Captain America Brady Tkachuk, We Enter Supreme Debate + Listener Submitted FAQ’s

2775.381

And I just knew it wasn't really going to be in the future. So I had an opportunity to go to Brown really early on. Mark Whipple actually helped kind of get me that job and knew from a very young age. I think this is what I wanted to do if I couldn't play.

Pardon My Take

Jaguars HC Liam Coen, Captain America Brady Tkachuk, We Enter Supreme Debate + Listener Submitted FAQ’s

2796.93

Man, Maine, too. I would say a lot of a lot of good coaches from that area like that northeast. You go with the Atlantic, old Atlantic 10, which became the CIA. And in the Ivy League, you just you can get opportunities because, well, you're paying nothing at a young age. You can go in and you wear a lot of different hats. So I was like the video coordinator in 2010.

Pardon My Take

Jaguars HC Liam Coen, Captain America Brady Tkachuk, We Enter Supreme Debate + Listener Submitted FAQ’s

2818.218

I'm the video coordinator, quarterback's coach, recruited like 10 states. And you get an opportunity to develop as a coach. But I've met guys that have come into the NFL and not knowing how to make a copy. So you've got to be able to learn and give the ops. And I think that that's what some of those kind of programs do. They give you an op to really kind of dive into it.

Pardon My Take

Jaguars HC Liam Coen, Captain America Brady Tkachuk, We Enter Supreme Debate + Listener Submitted FAQ’s

2869.604

Yeah, so it was after the first year in 2017. Matt LaFleur ends up going to the Tennessee Titans to go call it. Zach Taylor gets promoted from assistant receivers coach to quarterbacks. He doesn't name an offensive coordinator. A couple guys were on that staff. Shane Waldron was on that staff. A couple guys that I knew. I knew Zach a little bit when he was at Cincinnati. I was at Maine.

Pardon My Take

Jaguars HC Liam Coen, Captain America Brady Tkachuk, We Enter Supreme Debate + Listener Submitted FAQ’s

2892.978

We played UConn, had a little bit of a familiarity there. So knew a couple guys in the building, but ultimately it was a blind op. Like it was a blind op. I mean, Shane, I knew a little bit, but it was a blind op. Those guys that I kind of were in the interview process against had connections to Sean. I had no connection to him. Came in.

Pardon My Take

Jaguars HC Liam Coen, Captain America Brady Tkachuk, We Enter Supreme Debate + Listener Submitted FAQ’s

2913.611

I was the offensive coordinator at Maine and then a quick stop at Holy Cross that I didn't even get to coach at. Go in, interview for the assistant receiver's job. And he's got me on the board doing, you know, protections. He was drawing up an Abbey front, which we talk about the split mug. It's the Zimmer stuff with the double A gap mug stuff.

Pardon My Take

Jaguars HC Liam Coen, Captain America Brady Tkachuk, We Enter Supreme Debate + Listener Submitted FAQ’s

2931.663

And he's like, hey, man, how are you picking up nickel mic pressure out of this look? And I'm up on the board like, wait, I'm interviewing for the assistant receiver's job. Right. And you got me talking protections. Right. And I had never seen that, that look. And he's like, I turned to him. I said, I don't know what this is. He's like, man, don't worry about it. It's new in the league.

Pardon My Take

Jaguars HC Liam Coen, Captain America Brady Tkachuk, We Enter Supreme Debate + Listener Submitted FAQ’s

2950.133

We're just trying to ask a bunch of people and figure it out. So it was an honest kind of opportunity. Yeah. And I felt like I ended up going and winning the job.

Pardon My Take

Jaguars HC Liam Coen, Captain America Brady Tkachuk, We Enter Supreme Debate + Listener Submitted FAQ’s

2966.164

What is it? It was a play action concept with basically a max pro play action that I knew that they had run a few times with Deshaun Jackson when he was in Washington. It was like a deep V cut pylon route, we call it, which is like an 18 yards. stick your foot in the ground, go to the back pylon.

Pardon My Take

Jaguars HC Liam Coen, Captain America Brady Tkachuk, We Enter Supreme Debate + Listener Submitted FAQ’s

2984.521

And then he would use read on the sale concept and be able to chase it with it with a max pro play pass. I drew that one up. We had used that main. Um, and then really on third down, we drew up my favorite, uh, drop back concept was what we call pressure drive, which is an old, you know, old school West Coast concept that he had run for a long time. And but the detail. Right.

Pardon My Take

Jaguars HC Liam Coen, Captain America Brady Tkachuk, We Enter Supreme Debate + Listener Submitted FAQ’s

3007.116

It was like detailing that play, I think, was cool to to be able to talk through because, you know, when you get off the board and he's not really hitting you on a ton of different coaching points, you feel like at least you nailed it. Right. Right.

Pardon My Take

Jaguars HC Liam Coen, Captain America Brady Tkachuk, We Enter Supreme Debate + Listener Submitted FAQ’s

3021.323

Yeah, fast. That is what we talk about fast. You know, fundamentally sound, attacking, situational masters, and tough, both mentally and physically. So that's where it starts. That's where it stems. I think that the mentally and physically tough part, though, is the one that we really want to talk about. We go into Tampa this past year.

Pardon My Take

Jaguars HC Liam Coen, Captain America Brady Tkachuk, We Enter Supreme Debate + Listener Submitted FAQ’s

3039.244

They have the 32nd ranked run game in the NFL in the last two seasons. And we go and bring it to number four this past season. So it was buy-in. It was all about toughness, physicality, the way that we wanted to play the game, our style of play. I mean, dude, Mike Evans is digging out support on safeties. He doesn't have to do that stuff. And so we got him to that point. There was immediate buy-in.

Pardon My Take

Jaguars HC Liam Coen, Captain America Brady Tkachuk, We Enter Supreme Debate + Listener Submitted FAQ’s

3065.26

Fast. Okay. Fundamentally sound. Attacking. Already not a great acronym if you have to use two words, but keep going. Fundamental. Attacking. Situational masters. Again. What do you mean? Situational. This is bad. Situational.

Pardon My Take

Jaguars HC Liam Coen, Captain America Brady Tkachuk, We Enter Supreme Debate + Listener Submitted FAQ’s

3087.669

How do I achieve situational mastery? Dude, there's a lot of tape that we can go back and watch. Yeah. I mean, we watch Super Bowls, two-minute drives, four-minute drives, clock management situations from – we try to show them the good and the bad, right, but from previous years. Like Belichick had this book. Coach Belichick had a book.

Pardon My Take

Jaguars HC Liam Coen, Captain America Brady Tkachuk, We Enter Supreme Debate + Listener Submitted FAQ’s

3109.199

It was like the Bible that you have, and it's been kind of passed along through a lot of different people, and he's got – specific games, situations, when things came up, to where you can go back and look at, those situations still come up to me.

Pardon My Take

Jaguars HC Liam Coen, Captain America Brady Tkachuk, We Enter Supreme Debate + Listener Submitted FAQ’s

3162.039

Okay. D minus. D minus. Pretty easy. But also the fast is also the F. Ask Baker. I think he'll probably say it was pretty good. Listen, that was... I think those guys all bought in pretty quick. Wait, who? Baker? The entire Tampa Bay offense. Yeah, Baker's a dog. Yeah. Baker's dog.

Pardon My Take

Jaguars HC Liam Coen, Captain America Brady Tkachuk, We Enter Supreme Debate + Listener Submitted FAQ’s

3185.775

I don't feel – you know, it's not bad. It's unfortunate in ways because of the competitor, because of the person that he is. You know, we got really close. Obviously, we worked together in L.A. for those last kind of like five or six weeks. He was paramount, you know, kind of in my –

Pardon My Take

Jaguars HC Liam Coen, Captain America Brady Tkachuk, We Enter Supreme Debate + Listener Submitted FAQ’s

3204.022

evolution to coming to Tampa like getting there so yeah you definitely feel uh you feel unfortunate for the situation because of the type of dude that he is um but he's in a place where he's continuing to ascend like he's just doing this right now he's got a ton of confidence he's at a place where a lot of people love him and believe in him and I think that's only going to continue

Pardon My Take

Jaguars HC Liam Coen, Captain America Brady Tkachuk, We Enter Supreme Debate + Listener Submitted FAQ’s

3224.474

Did you ever text him back? Oh, yeah. What do you mean? Because he said that you he was left on read.

Pardon My Take

Jaguars HC Liam Coen, Captain America Brady Tkachuk, We Enter Supreme Debate + Listener Submitted FAQ’s

3252.647

That's smart. Just so you know what you're going to deal with moving forward. All right.

Pardon My Take

Jaguars HC Liam Coen, Captain America Brady Tkachuk, We Enter Supreme Debate + Listener Submitted FAQ’s

3289.518

You're going to have to use that op. You're down there. You're down there. You're going to have to use that op.

Pardon My Take

Jaguars HC Liam Coen, Captain America Brady Tkachuk, We Enter Supreme Debate + Listener Submitted FAQ’s

3296.721

Yeah. You're down there. And you're an opportunity to go score a touchdown. You're that close. Yeah. We all know how hard it is to score in the red zone in this league. So when you're down there, you've got to have your op. I think you've got to be aggressive there.

Pardon My Take

Jaguars HC Liam Coen, Captain America Brady Tkachuk, We Enter Supreme Debate + Listener Submitted FAQ’s

3328.525

2018, Seattle. We're in Seattle. We're up – We're up one in Seattle. We're on like the minus 40. And we're playing Russell Wilson at the time. They were rolling. And we were in a back and forth game. They hadn't stopped us. We really hadn't stopped them. And we take a timeout. It's fourth and one. And Sean goes around the whole headsets. What do we want to do? You know, sneak it or punt it.

Pardon My Take

Jaguars HC Liam Coen, Captain America Brady Tkachuk, We Enter Supreme Debate + Listener Submitted FAQ’s

3353.989

Obviously, give those guys the ball back again. Every single dude on the headset said punt it. Everybody. He goes to Wade Phillips. He was like, man, we haven't stopped him once. Go for it. And we went for it, sneaked it, won it. Game over. Yeah. If we didn't, it was could have been catastrophic. They're going to go five yards basically to go, you know, kick the game winning field goal.

Pardon My Take

Jaguars HC Liam Coen, Captain America Brady Tkachuk, We Enter Supreme Debate + Listener Submitted FAQ’s

3375.181

But it was like that aggressive mentality there that believing in the guys and have an understanding of like you haven't stopped them yet. Yeah. So that's not probably going to stop at that point. That may not change. It may. But play the odds. Yeah.

Pardon My Take

Jaguars HC Liam Coen, Captain America Brady Tkachuk, We Enter Supreme Debate + Listener Submitted FAQ’s

3419.836

So what was going through your head? No, it was just a cadence, right? I'm a quarterback by nature. I'm using my cadence. And hey, at the end of the day, you have to adapt to different cadences. That was my cadence at the time. And now, hey, I'm going to learn from these guys and be able to do a better job next time.

Pardon My Take

Jaguars HC Liam Coen, Captain America Brady Tkachuk, We Enter Supreme Debate + Listener Submitted FAQ’s

3448.092

I mean, I just go back to Dan Campbell talking about biting kneecaps. Yeah, yeah.

Pardon My Take

Jaguars HC Liam Coen, Captain America Brady Tkachuk, We Enter Supreme Debate + Listener Submitted FAQ’s

3466.057

Yeah, I think kind of a message for, you know, ShotKhan and what we're trying to do is be bold and be different. And I've never, you know, this past season in Tampa was my most truest authentic self for the first time. I wasn't trying to be Sean. I wasn't trying to be Kevin O'Connell. I wasn't trying to be Zach Taylor. I was just being myself. And, yeah, that was my cadence that day.

Pardon My Take

Jaguars HC Liam Coen, Captain America Brady Tkachuk, We Enter Supreme Debate + Listener Submitted FAQ’s

3486.786

Obviously wasn't too loved, but I think these guys, once we start winning games –

Pardon My Take

Jaguars HC Liam Coen, Captain America Brady Tkachuk, We Enter Supreme Debate + Listener Submitted FAQ’s

3509.609

Yeah, there you go. It's the eyebrow, I guess. Just keep the other eyebrow down.

Pardon My Take

Jaguars HC Liam Coen, Captain America Brady Tkachuk, We Enter Supreme Debate + Listener Submitted FAQ’s

3515.414

There you go. So we actually were having this conversation in Tampa two weeks ago. My son, three-year-old son, just did it. I can do it. My dad does it. It's just kind of a thing. It's not probably the coolest thing, but it's a thing.

Pardon My Take

Jaguars HC Liam Coen, Captain America Brady Tkachuk, We Enter Supreme Debate + Listener Submitted FAQ’s

3604.327

LA, we were together. Yeah, did you reach out to him when you took the job?

Pardon My Take

Jaguars HC Liam Coen, Captain America Brady Tkachuk, We Enter Supreme Debate + Listener Submitted FAQ’s

3612.771

He is the best. He took us to golf at Calabasas when he was living out there. He lives right around the corner from the golf course out there. We went and played a few times. I mean, the boat's a stud.

Pardon My Take

Jaguars HC Liam Coen, Captain America Brady Tkachuk, We Enter Supreme Debate + Listener Submitted FAQ’s

3643.102

He actually gave us my realtor. Oh, really? Yeah. I mean, he's the best. He's the best.

Pardon My Take

Jaguars HC Liam Coen, Captain America Brady Tkachuk, We Enter Supreme Debate + Listener Submitted FAQ’s

3659.438

He was so, he gave me a completely different perspective on the quarterback position when he came to LA. You know, I mean, Jared was young, still growing and still just that kind of little, the mentality, the little bit of the, Hey, screw it. I'll go let it rip and go play. This is who I am. This is how I play. He's like, dude, I'm like Chuck Knobloch.

Pardon My Take

Jaguars HC Liam Coen, Captain America Brady Tkachuk, We Enter Supreme Debate + Listener Submitted FAQ’s

3676.658

Like he would kill himself. He was like so self-deprecating. But it was good. It was in a good way. That's actually a good word in our profession.

Pardon My Take

Jaguars HC Liam Coen, Captain America Brady Tkachuk, We Enter Supreme Debate + Listener Submitted FAQ’s

3695.734

Yeah, I watched him play as actually a freshman in high school. Like, it was random. I was there recruiting a different player on his team. He was in a playoff game against Beaufort High School in Georgia, and he went and, like, ripped it. He was getting smashed in the face, just kept getting up, making plays. And so when I got with him, you know, a couple weeks ago, it was just you felt –

Pardon My Take

Jaguars HC Liam Coen, Captain America Brady Tkachuk, We Enter Supreme Debate + Listener Submitted FAQ’s

3714.381

a dude that just wants to go take it to the next level. He's mentally and physically tough. He's been able to go through a lot of stuff, and he's been through a ton of change, and all he wants to do is be great. He really does. He just wants to go be coached, go pour into this thing, and I think he's primed to go do that. He's going through a ton of change right now, obviously. Yeah.

Pardon My Take

Jaguars HC Liam Coen, Captain America Brady Tkachuk, We Enter Supreme Debate + Listener Submitted FAQ’s

3735.217

had the injuries a new father new coaching staff for the third time now right yeah um ton of humility but like he's got a feeling where he's like man I need to kind of play to my potential I haven't reached it yet um and that's cool to see

Pardon My Take

Jaguars HC Liam Coen, Captain America Brady Tkachuk, We Enter Supreme Debate + Listener Submitted FAQ’s

3760.989

Dude, we swam there. Played there in Clemson. We played Clemson, Kentucky in the bowl game. I didn't even see this thing. Yeah. Seriously? We swam in it with Doug Marone. Is it clean? Yeah, it's clean. Yeah, very clean. We were wearing jeans. You went full clothed? No, just jeans. I was one dozen Florida.

Pardon My Take

Jaguars HC Liam Coen, Captain America Brady Tkachuk, We Enter Supreme Debate + Listener Submitted FAQ’s

3792.267

Open up the pool. Yeah, open up the pool. It's like a family. Yeah, I got you. I can respect that.

Pardon My Take

Jaguars HC Liam Coen, Captain America Brady Tkachuk, We Enter Supreme Debate + Listener Submitted FAQ’s

3826.67

Start to shame people. Yeah. You can shame people for peeing in it. Yeah. Okay. I respect that.

Pardon My Take

Jaguars HC Liam Coen, Captain America Brady Tkachuk, We Enter Supreme Debate + Listener Submitted FAQ’s

3841.542

No, it's more that you're in a support role. Okay. Obviously, he's got a ton of responsibilities with offense, defense, special teams, personnel, a lot of stuff. So you're really the rhythm of the week. You're trying to help.

Pardon My Take

Jaguars HC Liam Coen, Captain America Brady Tkachuk, We Enter Supreme Debate + Listener Submitted FAQ’s

3854.471

create the clean rhythm right make sure everybody's staying on task getting their stuff done getting the scripts done defensive scripts cards you're essentially organizing throughout the entire week and then as he gets caught up and gets into the more the roots of the game plan then he can start to dive into like how he wants to attack how does he want to call the game so is it is it difficult yeah i probably underestimated that going from calling plays in kentucky

Pardon My Take

Jaguars HC Liam Coen, Captain America Brady Tkachuk, We Enter Supreme Debate + Listener Submitted FAQ’s

3880.532

to going to that role in LA after they won a super bowl, probably underestimated that for me. Um, but you know what you're getting into, you know, that you're going to go support a dude that's a complete stud and does things the right way, treats people the right way. Uh, and it's super infectious. So like, that's what you're going to be a part of. And you kind of know what you're getting into.

Pardon My Take

Jaguars HC Liam Coen, Captain America Brady Tkachuk, We Enter Supreme Debate + Listener Submitted FAQ’s

3914.462

No, we've kind of had some of those conversations this past year in Tampa when we were trying to get the run game going. Right. Todd's so multiple. Coach Bowles is so multiple on defense where you're saying, hey, we might have to have a couple of periods where we're just static here, where we can just go block people that are staying put. Yeah.

Pardon My Take

Jaguars HC Liam Coen, Captain America Brady Tkachuk, We Enter Supreme Debate + Listener Submitted FAQ’s

3931.513

So we can get good at blocking a double and a B and a single and a deuce. If we don't get those blocks in practice, how are we supposed to get good at them in the game? And the guys that can really adapt and see it from both lenses. Those are the probably, you know, usually the most successful ones.

Pardon My Take

Jaguars HC Liam Coen, Captain America Brady Tkachuk, We Enter Supreme Debate + Listener Submitted FAQ’s

3948.383

Dude, it's, it was like, I felt like it was just a barrage in training camp, but you don't know where it's coming from. You really don't. He's so multiple that way. I've never seen somebody in the second half of games adjust in 10 minutes. We all know what halftime adjustments got. You're getting the stuff you hadn't called in the first half or things that are working.

Pardon My Take

Jaguars HC Liam Coen, Captain America Brady Tkachuk, We Enter Supreme Debate + Listener Submitted FAQ’s

3971.414

How do you now dress it up to go do it differently? Todd Bowles had an ability in second half of games to take what they were doing and almost be like, we're going to do this and completely shut people down. I had never really seen that before. He ran the entire show. It was pretty cool to see.

Pardon My Take

Jaguars HC Liam Coen, Captain America Brady Tkachuk, We Enter Supreme Debate + Listener Submitted FAQ’s

3992.554

dude i know the that was one of the coolest moments i've ever been a part of man uh i think at the time i i liked it for mike evans a lot i i give him all the credit in the world i didn't like it from the saints because it was like you're you're supposed to hate the bucks right they didn't let it happen you don't think so not at all so what happened on that play we got him open and he made a play

Pardon My Take

Jaguars HC Liam Coen, Captain America Brady Tkachuk, We Enter Supreme Debate + Listener Submitted FAQ’s

4018.531

Dude, we ran the same exact play in the red zone the prior play when Bucky, Baker flips it to Bucky. We had had that play called, but Baker checked out of it because he thought he was getting zero blitz. So he checked out of that exact play. We ran something else. It wasn't open. Mike wasn't open. He ends up scrambling, flipping it to Bucky.

Pardon My Take

Jaguars HC Liam Coen, Captain America Brady Tkachuk, We Enter Supreme Debate + Listener Submitted FAQ’s

4036.248

Bucky just kind of innately gets in the end zone, and everybody's like, oh, my God.

Pardon My Take

Jaguars HC Liam Coen, Captain America Brady Tkachuk, We Enter Supreme Debate + Listener Submitted FAQ’s

4041.113

What did we just do? Yeah. You know, we just ruined this for him. And so when we got the ball back, we went back to that same play that we wanted to call down there and obviously didn't check out a bit. They weren't letting that happen. You don't think it was? Not at all. Ask their coaches. I've talked to their coaches. There was no shot they were letting that happen.

Pardon My Take

Jaguars HC Liam Coen, Captain America Brady Tkachuk, We Enter Supreme Debate + Listener Submitted FAQ’s

4065.628

See the reaction of those players, man. It was awesome. It was the coolest moment of the year, hands down.

Pardon My Take

Jaguars HC Liam Coen, Captain America Brady Tkachuk, We Enter Supreme Debate + Listener Submitted FAQ’s

4078.997

No, man, I gained such a different respect for Rashad after this year. When you go through it and see what he brings from a pass protection standpoint, there's probably not a lot of backs in the NFL better than him, and that goes so unnoticed. And he can still do it in terms of making people miss in the screen game. No, Bucky's just a dog. Yeah. Like that dude is in the building at 5 a.m.

Pardon My Take

Jaguars HC Liam Coen, Captain America Brady Tkachuk, We Enter Supreme Debate + Listener Submitted FAQ’s

4099.731

every single day hanging out with Tom Moore. Yeah. 87-year-old Tom Moore and Bucky Irving, one of the youngest players on our roster, hung out every single morning. Yeah. Like dude's a stud. All right.

Pardon My Take

Jaguars HC Liam Coen, Captain America Brady Tkachuk, We Enter Supreme Debate + Listener Submitted FAQ’s

4255.931

It was I interviewed on Zoom Wednesday. OK. And I never got in person. OK. Never was able to kind of get in person until after I end up going there. Yes. After that. Yes. But yeah. ultimately it came down to new information. New information became available.

Pardon My Take

Jaguars HC Liam Coen, Captain America Brady Tkachuk, We Enter Supreme Debate + Listener Submitted FAQ’s

4280.407

And like when you're going to buy a house and you figure out like it's either not as good or better than you thought. And some of the people that ultimately have kind of helped me throughout this journey have said like at the end of the day, you're allowed to change your mind. And that's like kind of life.

Pardon My Take

Jaguars HC Liam Coen, Captain America Brady Tkachuk, We Enter Supreme Debate + Listener Submitted FAQ’s

4298.513

It was the most gut-wrenching week of my life. It was. That's genuine. You sound like a lot of my boys that lived in my neighborhood that were diehard fans. They were pissed at me. Feelings hurt. Yeah, they were pissed. But they're cool now. We're good.

Pardon My Take

Jaguars HC Liam Coen, Captain America Brady Tkachuk, We Enter Supreme Debate + Listener Submitted FAQ’s

4314.285

And at the end of the day, with the guys, the boys, and they're FaceTiming me from the Bahamas, all excited, and I just go hug Todd Bowles and those guys, like... It's all good. It's all good.

Pardon My Take

Jaguars HC Liam Coen, Captain America Brady Tkachuk, We Enter Supreme Debate + Listener Submitted FAQ’s

4365.625

At the end of the day, man, it's entertainment, right? I mean, as much as it is, I grew up a Patriots fan. Die hard. Die hard. So I get it, man. I understand.

Pardon My Take

Jaguars HC Liam Coen, Captain America Brady Tkachuk, We Enter Supreme Debate + Listener Submitted FAQ’s

4383.738

Yeah. You think he was down? I watched that game live. Boat was, I mean, he was dealing. They were running the ball really well. Nah, dude, that shouldn't have been called down. I'm all Jags. I'm going Jags.

Pardon My Take

Jaguars HC Liam Coen, Captain America Brady Tkachuk, We Enter Supreme Debate + Listener Submitted FAQ’s

4482.551

I've known Grizz for a while, man. Met him here. I met him here, I don't know, five, six years ago. He's he's like he's a Yale dude, but he's a bro. I mean, he's a guy that he connects with so many different dudes like he can connect. He's smart. He's so smart. He dialed up all of our third downs. He did so much of the red zone, all the pass game.

Pardon My Take

Jaguars HC Liam Coen, Captain America Brady Tkachuk, We Enter Supreme Debate + Listener Submitted FAQ’s

4504.002

He can see it from an all 11 perspective, both in the run in the pass. He's going to be a really good force. For you guys, he will.

Pardon My Take

Jaguars HC Liam Coen, Captain America Brady Tkachuk, We Enter Supreme Debate + Listener Submitted FAQ’s

4530.69

Doesn't matter. No, what's cool is, like, he grew up on the sidelines. His dad was a coach. He grew up, like, on sidelines in the locker rooms. So we share that vision, right? And I think that's kind of what's cool about it is, like, we're coaches' kids. We have a chip on our shoulder. We want to prove it. Like, we want to go do it.

Pardon My Take

Jaguars HC Liam Coen, Captain America Brady Tkachuk, We Enter Supreme Debate + Listener Submitted FAQ’s

4548.059

And we've learned from pretty darn good people, and now it's an opportunity to go do it.

Pardon My Take

NFL With Steve Smith, The Jameis Winston Experience, CFB With Brandon Walker And Listener Submitted Pardon Your Takes

3701.147

If I had to vote for the Heisman, I would vote for Ashton Shanty. Oh, get out of here. Get out of here. I would happily be okay with Travis Hunter winning because I think that these are the two best Heisman-like contenders that we have had in so long. That's what I said. Neither is a loser. It sounds better coming from him. Shador should be number three in the Heisman voting, too.

Pardon My Take

NFL With Steve Smith, The Jameis Winston Experience, CFB With Brandon Walker And Listener Submitted Pardon Your Takes

3725.386

That is a possibility. I think I would personally vote for Jenty. I think it's not talked about enough that the second-laying rusher in the country is Ashton Jenty after contact. I think it's insane.

Pardon My Take

NFL With Steve Smith, The Jameis Winston Experience, CFB With Brandon Walker And Listener Submitted Pardon Your Takes

3741.129

It's crazy to watch. This is backfiring, PFT. His Heisman run was derailed because of injuries. Foot injury. Stamina's important. Stamina's important. Yeah, he was in a boot after.

Pardon My Take

NFL With Steve Smith, The Jameis Winston Experience, CFB With Brandon Walker And Listener Submitted Pardon Your Takes

3756.256

Tell us all the votes you have, by the way. What votes do you have? Bolitnikoff. Bolitnikoff. Nick Nash. Are you going to vote for Travis Hunter for that? I vote for Nick Nash. Yes. Triple crown. Nick Nash. San Jose State. One of my big things about wanting so badly again for the voting scene personality thing in college football was...

Pardon My Take

NFL With Steve Smith, The Jameis Winston Experience, CFB With Brandon Walker And Listener Submitted Pardon Your Takes

3775.089

the group of five representation representation for all the other people that didn't do it so i thought to myself if i don't vote for nick nash yeah nick nash you've become who you hated correct so four years ago liam would be livid i you know like jerry stearns got robbed of his bullet in the cough right a few years ago so nick nash triple crown leader it's kind of a no-brainer yeah he's electric what other votes you have

Pardon My Take

NFL With Steve Smith, The Jameis Winston Experience, CFB With Brandon Walker And Listener Submitted Pardon Your Takes

3842.961

Alabama's 100% in the playoffs. Yeah, it sucks, but it's going to happen.

Pardon My Take

NFL With Steve Smith, The Jameis Winston Experience, CFB With Brandon Walker And Listener Submitted Pardon Your Takes

3868.094

Yes. And I don't think they should be, but as a fan of college football. I'm not against it. I kind of love the chaos factor of Alabama getting in there and make stuff happen.

Pardon My Take

NFL With Steve Smith, The Jameis Winston Experience, CFB With Brandon Walker And Listener Submitted Pardon Your Takes

3975.104

He was very good. Even took a few carries over for Gentee because their RB2 and RB3 were hurt.

Pardon My Take

NFL With Steve Smith, The Jameis Winston Experience, CFB With Brandon Walker And Listener Submitted Pardon Your Takes

3985.311

Whoa. Jump on it. They're very good. We allow them to say what they want. They are great for college football players.

Pardon My Take

NFL With Steve Smith, The Jameis Winston Experience, CFB With Brandon Walker And Listener Submitted Pardon Your Takes

3994.795

I think Liam might be our college football expert. They're single-handedly going to win Travis Hunter the Heisman. You got to give him some respect.

Pardon My Take

NFL With Steve Smith, The Jameis Winston Experience, CFB With Brandon Walker And Listener Submitted Pardon Your Takes

4023.635

Truman Wehrmeyer. Straight out of Fargo. Fargo kid went to play at NDSU. North Dakota State.

Pardon My Take

NFL Week 15, Fastest 2 Minutes, Bills Statement Win, Eagles Dominate The Steelers, The Broncos Incredible Turnaround And More

2461.908

All right. I mean, we would have voted for Ashton Gentry if we had a vote. Yeah. I think we all agree on that.

Pardon My Take

NFL Week 15, Fastest 2 Minutes, Bills Statement Win, Eagles Dominate The Steelers, The Broncos Incredible Turnaround And More

352.113

We head out west where Hank is out there for the Cardinals and Patriots game.

Pardon My Take

Coach Jon Gruden In Studio, Week 16 Picks And Preview, Chargers Big Win, The Jets Are In Disarray Again + Fyre Fest Of The Week

5530.222

Buffalo Bills minus 14. Wow. You're right. You're right. Do you want to say it? Nope. I fucked that up last time and I lost. 49ers Dolphins over 44 and a half.

True Crime with Rachel Shannon

SOLVED, No Body: The Case Of Sarah Stern

1001.165

Uh, Preston and I go over to her house, take her safe, bring that over to my house before we do anything.

True Crime with Rachel Shannon

SOLVED, No Body: The Case Of Sarah Stern

1027.916

I watched her.

True Crime with Rachel Shannon

SOLVED, No Body: The Case Of Sarah Stern

1034.181

Put her in the trunk.

True Crime with Rachel Shannon

SOLVED, No Body: The Case Of Sarah Stern

1048.353

So I was driving, and I had her buckled in.

True Crime with Rachel Shannon

SOLVED, No Body: The Case Of Sarah Stern

1053.391

In the passenger seat, she looks like she's just sleeping.

True Crime with Rachel Shannon

SOLVED, No Body: The Case Of Sarah Stern

1056.093

She's just sitting up.

True Crime with Rachel Shannon

SOLVED, No Body: The Case Of Sarah Stern

1093.718

Fuck my leg up. Like, the weight from her body, like, made me fall, and my leg, like, went up. So now I'm lifting, my leg's fucked up, and there's three cars coming up. So I grab her body.

True Crime with Rachel Shannon

SOLVED, No Body: The Case Of Sarah Stern

1144.11

He was able to sit there and talk about how he killed his friend

True Crime with Rachel Shannon

SOLVED, No Body: The Case Of Sarah Stern

925.106

Didn't do anything.

True Crime with Rachel Shannon

SOLVED, No Body: The Case Of Sarah Stern

926.687

Nobody was there?

True Crime with Rachel Shannon

SOLVED, No Body: The Case Of Sarah Stern

930.35

He was in Florida.

True Crime with Rachel Shannon

SOLVED, No Body: The Case Of Sarah Stern

937.294

I fucking dropped my phone at Sarah's house.

True Crime with Rachel Shannon

SOLVED, No Body: The Case Of Sarah Stern

940.016

My phone was at Sarah's house.

True Crime with Rachel Shannon

SOLVED, No Body: The Case Of Sarah Stern

944.379

Yeah, I lost it.

True Crime with Rachel Shannon

SOLVED, No Body: The Case Of Sarah Stern

948.494

I had timed everything out so that... Dude.

True Crime with Rachel Shannon

SOLVED, No Body: The Case Of Sarah Stern

957.037

Strangling someone?

True Crime with Rachel Shannon

SOLVED, No Body: The Case Of Sarah Stern

977.345

To look for my phone, though, which is a reasonable, like, thing to do.

True Crime with Rachel Shannon

SOLVED, No Body: The Case Of Sarah Stern

982.488

Which is kind of, like, me losing my phone is kind of a good thing, because the cops are like, oh, he's hanging out out there.

Will & Rusty's Playdate

I was blind for an afternoon

2026.083

Fifth grade.

Will & Rusty's Playdate

I was blind for an afternoon

2240.193

Wait, just you and who?

Will & Rusty's Playdate

I was blind for an afternoon

2673.587

Sitting at the end of the road.

Will & Rusty's Playdate

I was blind for an afternoon

3169.125

It means you got ass crickets. You have craved cereal.

Will & Rusty's Playdate

I was blind for an afternoon

3325.938

Honda Civic with a Jewish bitch. Her name is Christian.

Will & Rusty's Playdate

I was blind for an afternoon

3342.265

We're putting on a civic with a Jewish dude. His name is Christian. It's kind of funny, Raven.

Will & Rusty's Playdate

I was blind for an afternoon

3461.136

Silent night. Holy night. All is calm, all is bright, round yon virgin mother child.

Will & Rusty's Playdate

I was blind for an afternoon

3497.406

Whippin' a Honda Civic with a Jewish dude, his name is Christian.

Will & Rusty's Playdate

I was blind for an afternoon

3657.683

S-I-M-P, squirrels in my pants.

Will & Rusty's Playdate

I was blind for an afternoon

3881.638

Is that what this is about? Pulling down a girl's pants and going, who did this to you?

Will & Rusty's Playdate

I was blind for an afternoon

3889.604

Where's your penis?

Will & Rusty's Playdate

I was blind for an afternoon

4356.297

No.

Will & Rusty's Playdate

I was blind for an afternoon

4990.951

Teach me something. This guy rocks.

Will & Rusty's Playdate

I was blind for an afternoon

5004.095

This guy rocks.

Will & Rusty's Playdate

I was blind for an afternoon

6310.942

Ooh.

Will & Rusty's Playdate

I was blind for an afternoon

794.719

What do you mean part two is coming out next year?

Will & Rusty's Playdate

100th episode goes NUTS

130.568

It was the mousetrap thing.

Will & Rusty's Playdate

100th episode goes NUTS

1491.374

Wait, tell me the story of your first kiss, Willie.

Will & Rusty's Playdate

100th episode goes NUTS

2316.533

You're not high yet.

Will & Rusty's Playdate

100th episode goes NUTS

2429.488

I fucking feel like the Michelin Man. I'm poofing all over the place. I feel bloated. Twisted tea, zero carbonation. It's made with real brewed tea, so it goes down smooth. And guys, we love it. Get some twisted tea today. Keep it twisted, brother. All right, guys. We are here to talk about one of our new favorite partners, Dollar Shave Club. Guys, facial hair is personal. It grows from your face.

Will & Rusty's Playdate

100th episode goes NUTS

2452.343

We all grow it, shave it, and style it differently. And we think that's pretty freaking great. It all makes us more interesting. Personally, I have been using the Dollar Shave Club 3-in-1 Freestyler, and here's why.

Will & Rusty's Playdate

100th episode goes NUTS

2466.913

I know. You got a razor on one end. You got a trimmer on the other. You can get all the stuff you need out of one thing.

Will & Rusty's Playdate

100th episode goes NUTS

2488.644

Okay, and for our full-bearded friends out there, give the double-headed electric trimmer a try.

Will & Rusty's Playdate

100th episode goes NUTS

2506.201

Wow. Wow.

Will & Rusty's Playdate

100th episode goes NUTS

3440.02

It is funny. Sometimes we're like, enough horsing around.

Will & Rusty's Playdate

100th episode goes NUTS

3630.403

This here.

Will & Rusty's Playdate

100th episode goes NUTS

3937.947

What's your favorite part about grooving? Oh, wait, we didn't do our favorite. Welcome back to favorite things about each other.

Will & Rusty's Playdate

100th episode goes NUTS

4013.682

FYI, the code automatically applies using the links. Discount code is PLAYDATE. Try it this weekend. Take it out with you so you feel better in the morning after a night out on the town. Pop it before, during, or after you drink. I recommend.

Will & Rusty's Playdate

100th episode goes NUTS

4048.805

Oh, that first part wasn't recorded?

Will & Rusty's Playdate

100th episode goes NUTS

4115.319

World-altering sloppy.

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This summer, Warner Brothers presents...

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Also, now that we learned babies watch this, we have to be more convenient. Babies. So many babies.

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Lauren.

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Bobby, I want you to meet my colleague, Dr. Hamilton.

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Get out of here!

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Oh, I'm looking at it now. That's hysterical. Pull the picture up. No, Jack's been doing this face. It's so bashful. Lauren, pull the picture up. We'll put it right here for the viewers at home. But I need you to show Will this. Lauren posted a picture where she looked very chic, very stylish, very beautiful.

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Can you please pull it up?

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All right. We have a beautiful episode for you guys today. We're going to hear your pitches followed by our pitches followed by two permitting divisions of the building department. Yep. One from Will, one from me, followed by our pitches, followed by this guy, Rox.

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All right, then we're going to do everyone's favorite segment. Teach me something. Followed by, guys, we are playing the hits today. We're doing sayings that don't exist, country songs that don't exist, slang words that don't exist, and rom-coms that don't exist. And let me tell you, there might be a couple special guests coming in. We got Liam for rom-coms.

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What's her first name again?

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Julia, I loved the pitch. When you doubled down and said that if you don't like airport talk, find another fucking podcast, you made your way into my heart.

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I love it, Julia. Lauren, let's hear another pitch.

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Yeah, like they have an employee do that.

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Exactly.

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Right, right.

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Is like just get in bed TV, whatever.

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Lauren, is my hair going to look okay?

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The team over at Accelerator, every time I think I can't like these guys anymore, they got wind.

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I don't know. Okay, Lucy. Lucy. Lucy goes, me again. I have a crazy good prank call for you guys.

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So not like a great part of my job, but I just have a few questions for you if you have a moment.

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We ran into a weird thing where, and honestly, we probably should have told you guys about this. There is this squirrel named Musco. Have you seen this at all? Musco's moment? No.

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But they're probably going to give you a call here in a second and try and clear that up with you if that's all right.

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pranked right now like is this even real uh you are getting pranked your daughter your daughter your daughter submitted your phone number and we do this thing we do it did i have you at all for a little bit did you believe me

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I know you blew it. I know I blew it. I blew it. Well, you were you were a great sport. Thank you so much for doing.

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This was Lucy. Oh, my God. Oh, my gosh.

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All right, Lauren, pause this immediately. And I mean, it's mine. Oh, Oh, sorry. No, you're good. Pause it. Uh, this is,

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Because they would bring them?

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We have a beautiful set of drafts for you guys today. Billy's here.

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I bought it yesterday because I had 15 minutes to poop before I had to come here. So I stopped at the gas station. They didn't have any Lucy's. So I got a vape and a Red Bull.

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That should mean a fish getting... That might be a saying. I'm a fish caught with two hooks.

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Guys, thank you so much for 100 episodes. I think we try and say it as much as we can, but you guys mean the world to us. You've given us the coolest job that's ever existed. The coolest job that doesn't exist. And we love you so much. You make our day. I hope we make yours sometimes. Comment.

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That was the best.

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We love you guys so much. Thank you, guys.

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Oh, yes, yes, yes. Sorry, sorry.

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Real quickie. Song of the day.

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Welcome back to Rusty's Song of the Day.

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Jimmy Buffett, I hope we brighten your Mondays, but I always thought what was great about this song is Monday is objectively the worst day of the week, and he made it into a positive. I love Jimmy Buffett so much, and this song means a lot to me. I hope it means a lot to you, and I hope when you listen to this playlist, you think of me, Lauren, and Will. We love you guys so much.

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Have a great rest of your Monday. Have a great Tuesday and we will see you bright and early on Wednesday for our Wednesday episode. Thank you guys so much for giving us the coolest job in the world. We love you so much. We love you guys. Love you.

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Montoya, por favor, happened again. This guy had to watch his girl get railed on television again.

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Das ist traurig.