Eddie
Appearances
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Back in Schabusiness
Yeah. Well, you know what you're going to do.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Back in Schabusiness
Oh, and we got police overtime's a problem.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Back in Schabusiness
Because we were talking about the New Jersey cop who was pranking everybody.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Back in Schabusiness
Yeah, yeah, yeah. We know. You know. There's another court case, if you want to stay in the world of court.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Back in Schabusiness
She's like, look at, this is the moments before she attacks this guy. And it's just like him, like her, like blatantly, like about to attack this man.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Back in Schabusiness
Well, from the wound. The scar. Yeah, because they closed up the scar from the prison attack.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Back in Schabusiness
Yeah, a disgraced cop who can't be a cop anymore, so he becomes a lawyer.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Back in Schabusiness
I don't know. He got shot in the Dominican Republic.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Back in Schabusiness
We got a couple of women that have really caused some trouble this week. You go, girls. Yeah. Shaka Khan. Shaka, shaka, shaka, shaka, shaka Khan. Shaka, shaka, shaka, shaka Khan.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Back in Schabusiness
We have our Kentucky teacher or we have our Ohio polygamist.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Back in Schabusiness
You know what I've realized being in Ohio for so long is that the news there, they're lucky Florida exists. Well, they're the new Florida. It is crazy there. All the time.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Back in Schabusiness
Martina Jones. I will say these guys, um, they are disgusting. They're terrifying. This is my favorite group of miscreants. Lots of like different versions of Jesus on meth. Like it's definitely, but I will say all these guys.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Back in Schabusiness
David Cessna is the scariest looking one for sure. Oh, yes, yes, yes. He's definitely killed before.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Back in Schabusiness
Yeah, I don't think these people are dog fighters.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Back in Schabusiness
They fed him once a day. And they made him stand. Yes. For long periods of time.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Back in Schabusiness
I know Women's History Month just ended, but we're here anyway.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Back in Schabusiness
Never. All right. So this teacher from Kentucky sexually abused a boy and then solicited him to kill her husband.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Back in Schabusiness
Get a white rhino. Let's keep that thing going.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Back in Schabusiness
How were your Jeffrey Epstein meetings? Man, short.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Back in Schabusiness
Yeah, well, this company, Colossal, also cloned four Red Wolves, which are critically endangered, so I think that's cool. That's cool. That's fine.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Back in Schabusiness
But the thing is, it's just like, they're getting all these people to really, look at who's the investors here. Tom Brady, Tiger Woods, Paris Hilton, and Peter Jackson.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Back in Schabusiness
And so I think that they're, you know, that's the kind of stuff that I. You ever see that movie with Willem Dafoe where he's like this hunter trying to kill the last one? No. It's fucking awesome.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Back in Schabusiness
yeah what's it called oh what the fuck is it called but yeah no it's he's trying to kill he's he's evil hunter and he's trying to kill the last tasmanian oh it's called the hunter that's hilarious it's a great movie wow you should really watch it so it's about like a poacher yeah no he's like the he heard of a tasmanian tiger and then so he's like out trying to kill it and then sam neill's trying to stop hired by a biotech company to kill it
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Back in Schabusiness
I think, you know, because it's weird because I'm going back and forth. Obviously, dire wolves had their chance. They're gone. Yeah. But also, new dog. I think it's cool.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Back in Schabusiness
Ooh, good lead way. CEO accused of choking a man and threatening to kill him on a cruise ship over barefoot dancing.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Back in Schabusiness
So this guy, unnamed victim here, dancing around, no shoes on. Nicole, the wife, goes up to him and says, quote, look, we're all grownups here. Can you put your shoes on? The victim then started cursing at her and giving her the middle finger.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Back in Schabusiness
You might even get the quadruple bird if he knows how to flick you off with his feet.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Back in Schabusiness
You see the two middle toes stick up? That would make me throw up, by the way. So the victim said that DiGiorgio used a lot of force, and it felt like his throat was going to be ripped out.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Back in Schabusiness
Shows his privilege because there are jails on these ships.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Back in Schabusiness
I hate to go back to something we were talking about earlier, but I can't help but notice that the boat is called the Resilient Lady, but it's owned by Virgin. Yep.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Back in Schabusiness
The legal team representing DiGiorgio, he's been CEO of this company since February 2022, said he looks forward to being absolved of any wrongdoing. Yes. But he did choke this person in front of everybody.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Back in Schabusiness
No, but it is. I think if you're going to choke someone, it's better to do it on land.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Back in Schabusiness
Then don't worry about it. They say that he was protecting his wife who felt harassed and threatened and intimidated. And then she said she was in no way in trouble. Yeah. So she was fine.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Back in Schabusiness
And chaos behind them. This was a good letter because they had a nice conclusion statement, like a Jerry Springer.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Back in Schabusiness
I talk about that this week on Brighter Side, actually.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Back in Schabusiness
That's crazy because I watched the driver picked up my trash today and the hook grabbed my can and it just went in the back of it.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Back in Schabusiness
I put it, I don't even use the bags because the bags don't always biodegrade. So, are you using all these?
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Back in Schabusiness
And then I take the shit straight from the scooper and then I put it in the green bin.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Back in Schabusiness
Yeah, we're the only guys in the game, right? Probably the only liberal guys in the game.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Back in Schabusiness
I hate all of it. There you go. That's what I love. And if you hate everything and you live in the Fort Lauderdale area, come see Henry and I do Side Stories Live on May 7th at the Fort Lauderdale Dania Improv. They keep changing the name of this fucking place. They really do. But Fort Lauderdale Improv, Dania Improv, Fort Lauderdale in general, we're going to be there on May 7th.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Back in Schabusiness
And then the following night, May 8th, we're going to be up at the Orlando Funny Bone. The late show is the only one left.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Back in Schabusiness
Early shows sold out. Late shows still available. Dad's Garage. Side stories. And that is going to be... Pretty much all of our shows are pretty improv. We've got bullet points and stuff.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Back in Schabusiness
And then, of course, just in a couple weeks, in two weeks, we're going to be in Detroit for Last Podcast on the Left at the Masonic. That's going to be on April 18th. Make sure you come check that show out. There's still a couple tickets left, so grab them.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Back in Schabusiness
while they got nuts also um i'm hitting the road um i'm coming for a sandwiching those fort lauderdale and orlando dates on may 6th i'm going to be in naples that's a tuesday at the off the hook uh comedy club come hang out with me there i'm going to have kevin skinny and lisa correo with me it's going to be a lot of fun and then may 9th through the 11th Comedy Key West, baby.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Back in Schabusiness
I'm going there and that's going to be a fucking blast.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Back in Schabusiness
Yeah, yeah. So if we'll, I'll talk to Ken.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Back in Schabusiness
I thought you didn't have to buy clothes for abortions.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Back in Schabusiness
Yeah, I really should bring Robert the Doll a t-shirt. That'd be cute. What were you going to say? It's a cat. Yeah, it's cute. Sweating cat. It's a cat. Robert, I can't wait to meet you, buddy. I love you. I don't disrespect you in any way. I'm bringing you a gift. And we love your hat.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Back in Schabusiness
Why is the Spotify comment so much more evil than any other?
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Back in Schabusiness
It's coming up. It's two months out. If you can make the trip, like, honestly, you are just in this space, not just with us, but with some of the greatest UFO people in the world and some of the worst. That's the best. And it's truly like seeing Nick Pope at the bar at 2 a.m. It's just the best.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Back in Schabusiness
Hell yeah, that's so cool. Congratulations, man. I wish I was there.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Back in Schabusiness
I don't know why I can't remember his name. Fire in the Sky. We saw Travis Walton. Travis Walton just playing guitar next to a fire. It is nuts. It is so much fun. And then celebrities show up because they need to see this. They're not even a part of the thing.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Back in Schabusiness
I'm going to see Run the Jewels soon. When? They're opening for Wu-Tang. No shit. When? It's in June. Where? Here, in town. Where? I don't know where.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Back in Schabusiness
And hail whoever has to deal with tailorship business. God Her business is between her and God
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Back in Schabusiness
Well, yeah, she has nothing but time. It's entertaining, at least.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Back in Schabusiness
Now, can I ask you another question about this? So, her and Chad Daybell, both convicted for murdering the kids. Yes. Why does Chad Daybell get the death penalty and she didn't?
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Back in Schabusiness
He was shot execution style on the ground.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Back in Schabusiness
Last podcast in a while. Oh, man. Dude, when I was in Tallahassee recently for the show, I was like, I was doing, every time I saw someone, I was like, gave them a joint. And I was just like, this is the last podcast in a while. Fuck yeah.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: The R Train
That's doing this whole thing where he's like, I thought Lori was innocent. I thought she was innocent the whole time. And it wasn't until I told my granddaughter like he was like, oh, my God, talking about this thing. And everyone's like, no, no, no, no, no, no. Shut the living fuck up. Shut up, because you can very possibly get the whole thing thrown out. Very easily. Yeah.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: The R Train
Because they're morons. It's also, it was just extremely, Arizona's got very loose laws when it comes to the jury.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: The R Train
Welcome to Side Stories. Spin her around. I know. I remember. My name is Henry Zabrowski. She is not. She's a squirter and a spitter. I'm sitting here with Ed Larson, who is picking apart.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: The R Train
Yeah, because they had that whole crazy jail for Joe Arpaio life. Oh, I remember that. But Laurie, Yeah, Lori looks like shit. She got an opportunity to put on makeup again that she made from a series, I guess, of berries and juice mixes that she's got. Yeah. Could be blood. Some blood. Her hair is looking rough. She's honestly, her face is kind of falling a little bit. Age is starting to show.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: The R Train
But thankfully, she happily gets to go back to her favorite jail in Idaho. Yes. That's really what she was missing. And good on you, Lori, you fucking bitch. And I hope somebody shanks you in jail, you fucking homicidal maniac. I mean, it might happen, but I think, is she in Gen Pop? I doubt it. Right? She's too popular.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: The R Train
Well, she apparently is in a, she says she gives a series of spiritual counseling to some women that are in jail. Oh my God. I bet she is like a weird little guru. They all talk. Everybody's got, they got nothing but time.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: The R Train
Yeah. They're going to do nothing but hang out. So they can sit and listen to her pontificate about her dumb shit ideas, and they can all wait for Moroni to fucking pop them out of jail.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: The R Train
It was so hard. Honestly, because they're even canceled, they're still going on tour from prison. Yeah. They're still putting out specials. She's in isolated high security, is what it says. Isolated high security. Okay, yeah. So there ain't no one really hanging out with her. She should do a podcast from jail. I'm surprised they don't let her. OPN, let's bring it here. So you would like it?
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: The R Train
I mean, in terms of that way, I could make it, but then maybe I could flip it on her. You should interview her. She's doing interviews. I'd have a hard time not doing it without screaming at her. Yeah. Because that was the thing. Even just watching it, I'm screaming at my YouTube. I'm watching and being like, you fucking dumb bitch.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: The R Train
You're specifically not understanding the things that they are telling you. You're specifically not understanding things because you want reality to be your way, and it's not. You killed your kids, you homicidal maniac.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: The R Train
I don't want the rat. Oh, my God. I can't believe you don't want the rat. I am at a low today. You're at a low? I am. I am vulnerable.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: The R Train
Lots of in-prison stuff. But do you know that they did a new autopsy on Pope Jorge? Mm-hmm. Baby oil. Baby oil? All in him. No! Ass?
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: The R Train
All over his chest? Oh, my God! Cum residue on his butt cheeks?
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: The R Train
Oh, my God! How are they going to make him into a mummy?
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: The R Train
Honestly, it's going to be so hard. You're going to scrape all the stuff off first. Well, you need oil in the Catholic Church to anoint. You've got to be anointing. Yeah, yeah. He was anointing to fucking Sheba and back. Man. But, yeah, apparently Diddy claims... Well, this is the new thing. His defense attorney, who they're already talking too much. Yes.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: The R Train
The government came at Diddy with this absolutely Byzantine series of charges. I want to say it's something like hundreds of charges. Yes. They are now trying to say up front that one of their big defenses in the trial, I believe the trial date's set for like mid-May. It's starting soon. Oh, is it? Yeah, the Diddy trial's starting soon. Ooh. It's going to be good. Are you going to watch that one?
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: The R Train
Of course. But they are saying now, according to his defense attorney, he is trying to say that all of the years of all of the various parties, all the layers of all of the organization of the human trafficking and sex with minors in a group aspect and all of this shit, that he was simply too wasted to have planned all that himself. Yeah, too drunk to fuck is what he says. Too drunk to fuck.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: The R Train
That's his defense. And I just don't think... It's not a defense. Not for 25 years of rape. Yeah, no. You know what I mean? It's like 25 years. I mean, even one, it's not. Yeah, of course. But even frat boys go to prison occasionally. All the time. It's still rape. And it's like they get full on, he planned it. Millions of dollars was put behind it.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: The R Train
All of it. Every single layer of it. I actually feel nothing about the age. It's mostly that I feel like dog shit for days, and I want to party so bad. I am in a party mood. I wish that I could go out there and have fun, and I can't right now, and it sucks. We're partying on Thursday, bro. LPN Funhouse. Come on out.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: The R Train
Emails, texts, like plane tickets, catering. Like, think about just the layers of that catering bar service, the DJ, all these things that were at these parties, just like any other giant Hollywood party.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: The R Train
So there was an infrastructure in place. The people that were all involved. Ashton Kutcher's hanging out. His bosses from his record companies are hanging out. They all knew it was happening. Yes. They all were talking about what's-her-name just came out. Was it Coco? Oh, no. Ice-T and Coco? Coco said she went to every single one of them. No, Coco! Of course. But Coco, don't say that.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: The R Train
Coco is trying to make a point. I love Coco. Not the Mexican skeleton. No. I like that Coco more, though. Good. Yes, that Coco. But Coco is saying that she was involved with all of these various things. She's going to be involved with all this shit.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: The R Train
What a good time for an audio medium for you and I right now.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: The R Train
I am dying. I'm fucking dying. I find it interesting. He's not getting out of this. No. No one wants to go down with it. There's hundreds of charges. No one wants to go down with it. And I actually think that now, too, we're going to see even more. Ghislaine Maxwell from behind jail, she's trying to get out. She's trying to flip on whoever the last bits that she can flip on.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: The R Train
She should just flip on Diddy. Diddy is, this is where it's separate. And it's why Diddy got arrested versus why Epstein didn't. We talked about this a little bit. Yeah. Right. I guess in the end, Epstein got arrested. But it was I mean, who knows how all that was going to shake out before he killed himself or was allowed to kill himself. Yeah. So told, told possibly, you know.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: The R Train
Diddy, again, was in the expendable business of entertainment and drug trafficking. Yes. That's expendable. And human trafficking. Yes. Again, does it matter? These are not crimes that they care about. Diddy was not connected to the intelligence community. That's the difference. Yes. Ghislaine was connected to the intelligence community. Prince Andrew was connected to the intelligence community.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: The R Train
Epstein obviously was a spy. There's a difference between Prince Andrew and Ashton Kutcher. Barely. Barely, but yes. And there's a difference. And speaking of Prince Andrew, Virginia Giuffre, that was his main accuser during the entire Epstein saga, all of this...
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: The R Train
She just committed suicide, and she had this sort of massive, like, fall from grace over the last, like, short period of months where she was getting, she was starting to act really erratic. She claimed to almost be murdered in a bus accident. She said she only had four days to live after this bus accident. The bus driver was like, this is, like, she's exaggerating.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: The R Train
She then went through a really intense divorce where she accused her husband of abuse. I don't know what happened with domestic violence. Does all of this shit happen? Obviously, Virginia Giuffre's life, was destroyed. Completely suffering from PTSD. Utterly traumatized from all of the things. God knows what's going on. But now her parents are saying, let's investigate the suicide.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: The R Train
I just think it's more of an example of... Why this is all so hard for people to talk about, to lay their lives on the line, to be whistleblowers for. It's extremely difficult, especially something like her. So I think that she's a nut. Like this whole Epstein thing is still rolling and rolling and rolling.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: The R Train
And now we're seeing the fact that, you know, like our president was his best friend and all the other connections that you have. We know that he had some connections to Netanyahu.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: The R Train
You're going to see me struggle live on the 1st of May, the day after this comes out on LPN TV, twitch.tv slash LPN TV from 4 p.m. Pacific to sometime.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: The R Train
yahoo you know he had some connections to all these other things it's all fucking very bad and prince andrew you told me she he paid her off they had it well they had a settlement okay they had a settlement and then prince andrew was fucking stripped of all of his fancy shit
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: The R Train
They took all of his scepter. They took his little curled boots.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: The R Train
They took his thing. They popped his sweat glands so he could sweat again. And that was the whole thing with Prince Andrew. He said that he couldn't sweat. You couldn't possibly sweat. That's what goes with Virginia Giuffre described them dancing and him heaving on top of her. She just talked about the sweat pouring down his face. You ever remember scary stories to tell in the dark? Yes.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: The R Train
You remember that drawing of that lady with the long stringy white hair and that thing in that? I don't remember. Rob, please find. That's Prince Andrew. Okay. That's like what she saw when Prince Andrew was heaving on top of her.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: The R Train
This is literally, they have the same face. They have the same body. And they have the same- That looks like me at prom. Yeah. But, again, it's just another example of how this pain just keeps on rolling. So they're playing whack-a-mole with them. We have no idea who else is there. Like, think about who else we're not talking about.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: The R Train
I imagine that there are people within these structures that would surprise the living hell out of you. That is part of what they were even saying about the Diddy stuff, is that part of the Diddy stuff that helps wrap it all in mystery is that there's a couple of people in there that you'd be like, what? Of course. It's like... And it might be someone you really don't want it to be.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: The R Train
But if it is, then it is. Like my hero, Chuck Schumer. Yeah. Oh, my God. My hero, that brave revolutionary Chuck Schumer. Chuck Schumer hasn't gotten hard since Jaws came out. Oh, no. He gets hard when his tumors get hard. Rob, good luck editing this.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: The R Train
Yeah, yeah, this is disgusting. The two of us just sound like we're in an off-track bedding. I'm doing my best. We owe, we have to do the episode, guys. We have to be, we have to be recording. Oh, wait till we do another one tomorrow that airs next week and you got to listen to it all again. Just choking and fucking wheezing. By the way, the trial starts on Cinco de Mayo. Taco Monday. Yeah, buddy.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: The R Train
You're going to come in and I'm doing it all. I'm leaving early. I'm not. I'm locked in for the entire four hours. It should be a lot of fun. Yeah, because P-Funk's in town. I'm like, we should go see our favorite band on your birthday. And you're like, no, we must work. I was told. We must do this. It was booked.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: The R Train
Oh, tell me. I'm going to get my tapas lined up. I can't wait, dude. I can't wait for that front row seat.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: The R Train
It's too drunk to organize. That's the thing. You have to be... I'm stoned a lot. Yeah. It's still your house. I have many opportunities to sort of clear up and make some business emails. Yeah. Everybody wear white. That's an order. That's called producing.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: The R Train
His whole career is producing. Anything that he says trying to escape blame doesn't really make any sense because he was so up his own ass with his own organization. He was such a control freak and he was so obsessed with all of this shit. It was his real job. The sex stuff was his real job. The rest of it was the hobby. And then he was doing all of this stuff.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: The R Train
And when you are that level of producer, the way they do it, much like the president, they're trying to say they're delivering orders, much like how Diddy helped kill Tupac and fucking Biggie, now that this seems like it, definitely was involved in some level. But when you have that amount of money and that amount of clout, when you do say dumb shit like that,
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: The R Train
Enough go people that are making legit money and are legit important make it happen for you. So then, yes, of course, they're all the foot soldiers. They get with all the foot soldiers. Also, they do the flip. Time to do the flip. I mean, his little white boy's flipping. I mean, the white boy was the worst choice that B. Diddy ever made. Yes. That drug dealer.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: The R Train
Anybody that looked like a character from the road trip films is not allowed to be my mule. You're not my main mule. I want my mule to be an abuelita.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: The R Train
Because an old woman, too. You know what's the best part about an old woman? Is that you can also give her a couple, if you lop off the titties, right?
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: The R Train
You put a couple grenades in her bra and stuff like that.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: The R Train
If you get her old enough not to give a shit, she'll pop those too. Fucking take one for the shit. Wow. That's good. Kill herself and everybody else involved. Hell yeah. That's a good mule.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: The R Train
Oh, God. I would say the saddest person involved would be, I don't care about the rest of the 70s show people, you know? Yeah. You know who I'd really feel sad for? Who? Mace. Oh, yeah. Where's Mace at? Mace left. He became a preacher. Oh, which happens. But now I actually wonder if Mace saw what was going on and he was so freaked out. He was like, I need the Lord. A lot of people do that.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: The R Train
Yeah, of course. General Buck naked. Of course. He became a preacher after he stopped being a warlord. It's almost like an escape valve.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: The R Train
It's almost like a thing that they can do that's real easy because they built a system for a bunch of people that have done a bunch of crimes against large groups of people to just do a Hail Mary pass and then just get good with God and then they get to just move on.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: The R Train
We were going to hang out with George Clinton on your birthday. And you were like, no, Eddie. Holden says we work, and what Holden says goes.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: The R Train
Well, everybody else has to deal with all the horrible things that they did, but at least they get absolution, Eddie. So I think that's what's awesome about organized religion. Yeah, and it's good. And they become leaders in the community. And that's the best part about it. They are allowed to do a lot of things. And they get access to budgets and money and crew again.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: The R Train
Charged, this is the headline, man charged with raping corpse on New York City subway. You know, the reason why you felt, I feel like if we don't tell this story, it's like against the mantra of the show. Oh, I agree. I agree. Now, the man- It's not fun. No. Felix Rojas, 44 years fun, has been charged with first degree rape over the disturbing April 9th incident on a subway train in Manhattan.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: The R Train
The R train. Oh, of course. Truly the worst one. It's like, oh, you know, if I'm on this train, you got to do it. Hey, like on the M train is where you get murdered. Yes. Now, the New York City subway system. What happens on the G train? Gaped. Getting gaped. But that's consensual.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: The R Train
It's consensual, y'all. But this guy, so a guy died. So the story goes. A man died of natural causes on the train. He gets on the R train. One of my worst nightmares. Sounds like he had a heart attack or something on the train. Yeah. It's hard living in New York. Oh, it is. But the guy, a man saw him, robbed him. No, it was a woman. A woman robbed him. After. Oh, the woman robbed after the R?
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: The R Train
Both. So the man robbed him. Okay. Saw he was dead. Robbed his corpse. Okay. Didn't know it was a corpse until he felt, I guess, how cold his torso was. But he still took his money. Yep. Then said... I like this. Had sex with his mouth and his butt. Yes. Right? The corpse. On camera. Then he left. And then he was robbed again by the woman. Then the corpse was robbed again.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: The R Train
Oh, see, I thought the woman robbed him first. Nope. No. No, no, no. See, so this is the thing is that New York's a hard city to live in. It is.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: The R Train
The thing is, everyone thinks everyone's a lunatic in New York. We all do. Eight million people live there. And then at any given day, there's another eight million visiting or coming in from Jersey and Long Island. No offense, Rob.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: The R Train
This isn't a long... This is not an anti-New York sentiment.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: The R Train
When that many people live in one place, there's going to be horrible shit happening. It's just the way that they talked about it and just like the idea that the man... It's the consideration. It's the man on an open train sees a corpse. And yes, I do believe there... Okay. How do I walk through this? It was before midnight. Wow. This is, that's not good either. Yeah, it was $5.55. Yeah. Wow.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: The R Train
Middle of the day. The woman robbed him first. The woman robbed him first. Thank God we cleared it up. Yeah, no, that's, I mean, if there's like a guy with his pants around his ankles, a dead body with his pants around his ankles and like semen in his butt, and then you go rob him, that seems worse than just robbing a dead body. Robbing a dead body, I almost don't see the crime.
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Side Stories: The R Train
You know what's funny, Eddie, is that I'm almost with you. where if he's dead... I've been playing too much Baldur's Gate. I've been playing too much Baldur's Gate. He got looted. Yeah, he got looted. He got looted. Now, that's different, right? Yes, certainly it's hard to live in New York. It's hard to live in America right now. Everybody's worried about money.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: The R Train
I could see out of pure, utter, horrible desperation you robbing a dead body for the money within it. That is not... Again, that is the... That's just one crime that is just more of a sad state of affairs for the country, right? Yeah. It's more the checking his pockets. Ah, he doesn't have anything. And then looking around, it's been like, but you know what I could do?
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Side Stories: The R Train
Like, that's what I don't understand. I don't know if it's the being like, do you think that it's a guy that he's had his eyes on for a while and he takes the train every day and he's been falling in love with him slowly but surely on the train? Yeah. Gwyneth Paltrow, Bradley Cooper like scenario where he's been watching him come on every day and they take the same route every day.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: The R Train
And he's always kind of wondering what it'd be like to try to kiss him. Maybe he's trying to bring him back to life. You know, no one ever says that either. No one ever thinks that that like, cause it's like, oh, well if he's going to, so is that the corpse with the knee up? No, this is just the same man. He takes the subway a lot.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: The R Train
But they have him on footage. That's why. Well, yeah, he definitely has a bit of a Michael Che style about him. I mean, yeah. In terms of his dress. Not his activities. No, no, no, no. I mean, I don't know. We haven't hung out with him a lot. No, it's been a while. But I don't think he's having sex with corpses anymore. I would highly doubt it. I don't know.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: The R Train
He seems like he's too successful for that. Let's ask Colin Jost. Now, these guys are like... But it's just this idea of... You know, of course, everyone in the audience is saying, stop this. Stop talking about this. Yeah. But we want to know what makes somebody choose to do this. Side stories, LPOTL and gmail.com.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: The R Train
I didn't want to. No, it's not true. I am excited to be part of the LPN Funhouse. It was booked first. Now, this is, and that is called, that's called how it is, but not only am I excited for that, but then next week we're going to be all throughout Florida. We're going to have a lot of fun.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: The R Train
What would... What the circumstances that you would have to be under to randomly have sex with a corpse that you've just found? Yeah, I don't know.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: The R Train
I don't think I could... I don't think it could ever happen. Even if it was... My wife.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: The R Train
I don't know, buddy. I feel like we've walked into a whole area. I feel like we're in a- I'm trying to figure out- We're in a troubled zone. I feel like we're in a troubled zone here. No, most of this will get caught. It's fine.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: The R Train
It's your wife. Mm-hmm. She can fuck me when I'm dead. Please. I have openly said it so many times. Please fuck me when I'm dead, Julie. I said, play with my dick and balls. Dress me up in a dress. Fucking sit on my face. Play with my corpse and shit. And Natalie's like, please stop.
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Side Stories: The R Train
And I'm like, this is romantic. Yeah. I love you. I love you. You hear that, Julie? I love you. He loves you so much. He wants you to play with his dead corpse. That's right. And again, Natalie says, stop being Mormon. Stop talking about your corpse. And it's like, well, guess what you've inherited? Yeah. Because you're a wife. That's right. So you get a husband's corpse eventually.
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Side Stories: The R Train
Asses to asses. Bust to bust. That's what I hope for. Well, I'm really glad we covered this story. Because we learned so much. And there was just so much to it. Yes. No, it's very important news.
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Side Stories: The R Train
It's weird, you know, because... What do you not tell people? I don't know.
Last Podcast On The Left
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You know, if this happens, you gotta, like, I don't know. It just seems to me... Spread them? Like a weird... Yeah.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: The R Train
It just seems like a weird set of circumstances. Mm-hmm. And that's what we investigate here.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: The R Train
Well, in Texas, people get arrested for... much more victimless crimes. Of course. Almost most of their crimes there. They kind of ignore the crimes that have victims. Yeah.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: The R Train
A man accused, I don't think he was arrested, of placing Easter eggs filled with weed.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: The R Train
all around his Texas town, and then posting scavenger hunt clues on social media. He did go too far, because it's still legal there, and they are the type of nerds and shitheads and fuckfaces that will arrest you for weed. They have nothing better to do all day. They just sit all day, and they can't wait to arrest you for weed, especially if you're of the browner persuasion like this man is.
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Side Stories: The R Train
Toronto, which is sold out. Toronto, sold out. Sold out. Go screw. I think it's oversold. Yeah, we're going to have to kick people out. We're going to have to kick people out, or at least I think someone's actually going to have to sit on my back.
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Side Stories: The R Train
That's Pope Francis' fault. He literally asleep at the wheel here. His one job is to manage the calendar. Yeah. You can't do that, Frankie. Whatever, bro. Can't wait to see your fucking robotic fucking successor. Yeah. At least he won't make Easter on 420. Pope chat PGPT. Trying to fucking keep everyone stoned in front of their families. Honestly, 420, it was nice.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: The R Train
Honestly, it was really cool to have it be 420 on that day. It was awesome.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: The R Train
Oh, yeah. You want me to engage you with your kids? I'm going to be stoned. Yeah. But yeah, this guy put, the problem is that he gave too many hints and the weed doesn't look bad. No, it doesn't. It's like, it's regs. Yeah. You know, it's regs.
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That's free ass fun weed. That guy was a fun guy. Officers found four eggs and one was placed- They must have been really looking. In three different parks and one was found behind a Motel 6. It's-
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Side Stories: The R Train
You know, it's just such a waste of resources. This is such a massive waste of resources.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: The R Train
What a narc. Yeah. What is this fucking shit, dude? It's like even your little girl, even if she eats it, it's not going to do anything to her. She can eat all the fucking weed she wants. She's not going to get fucking high. Man, look at this guy.
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Side Stories: The R Train
yes it's gonna be very cool we're having people come on stage yeah we're gonna have people who come on stage and just sit there and interrupt i think yes yes throw shit at us can't wait yeah we're doing it's called the hurdle show yeah no i want to see how hot you can get tim horton's coffee and throw it on henry you could get up to i guess it's like 49 celsius i don't know what the legal hottest temperature is in canada
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: The R Train
That's a fun idea. This is a victimless crime. This is just fun. The kids are, yeah, again, you can eat the actual weed and without it being cooked and fat.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: The R Train
It just fucking comes at your butt. I guess if it's in parks, children could find it.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: The R Train
And then guess what? Kid can sell it. Yes. Teaches them about business. Yes. That's about business. It's supply and demand. Guess who's holding? Little Jeremy. I'm walking around and I'm looking for fucking green and guess who's holding? Oh, you better come check out my fucking, my boy Jeremy's got some shit. You just got to roll by my recess.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: The R Train
And then I go in there and I play kickball with all the kids and I get my fucking weed, dude. That's fun as hell.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: The R Train
Ha! That's where he messed up. I feel like this guy should have done a little bit, but also I'll say to him, I think that he should have done more research about where to probably put the eggs. Yeah, police station. You know what also you do with something like this? I will say this. I hope that this tradition continues.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: The R Train
What I would like for people to do, though, is do this in a controlled environment where you tell everybody within a closed group
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: The R Train
I used to do this. Oh, yeah. In college, when I sold weed, we had Easter egg hunts. We filled a lot of them with weed. Some of them we filled with trash. Some with Xanax. I think I put a little cocaine on one. And then, you know, we had an Easter egg hunt around my property.
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Side Stories: The R Train
You see, that's fun. Around where I live. This is, again, it is, if everybody knows. You know what got really mad? The guy who found most of the weed didn't smoke, and then he sold it to someone at the party. I got really pissed off. I don't even like him anymore. You know what's funny, though? What? That's exactly what I proposed to that little Jeremy to do. Yeah, I know. I know.
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Side Stories: The R Train
And I don't mind that. Now that I think about that, I don't like it. You give it away or you fucking smoke it. Well, it's also weird to put that. Now I got to move all this weed. Yeah. Like, that's weird. You just give it to somebody. Yeah. Or just fucking quit being a dweeb and smoke it. Yeah, man.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: The R Train
Or to have a panic attack, break into schizophrenia for a little while, then get medicated if that's what your deal's going to be. Yeah. Because guess what it gives you? A cool story. And then also guess what it gets you to be? A subject of a Ben Folds 5 song. Breaking up. No, the one that, you remember the guy like, Stephen's Last Night in Town. You know, I really love that album.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: The R Train
The rest of it, it does not hold up. Really? It's very, it's not for us anymore. I remember, I love it because of high school theater. Same. And we used to always, the cute girls would always dance around listening to it.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: The R Train
All right, here we go. We got another one. This is just another good, short, and sweet one. Okay. Southwest Flights. We love them. You know, I hate Southwest. No, I'll never go on one ever again. I'd rather walk.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: The R Train
Well, I heard they're getting rid of the far and away type seating.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: The R Train
Yes, they are getting rid of the strongest winds seating arrangement. Assigned seats. Bare minimum. It's the bare minimum. Also, greatest thing that ever happened to the movie.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: The R Train
I will never I always remember how long New York held on to not having the ticketed seats and it's like guys do we have to be the coolest city in the world always this is the dumbest shit just fucking let us assign seats so that we can show up when the movie when we want to yeah cause you would have to show up like an hour early and save a whole row for all your friends and then they wouldn't show up late and then you're like people are like let me sit there like hi my friend but I do miss the game a little bit a little bit I miss the game there used to be a little bit more cause then you get to talk to your neighbor
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Side Stories: The R Train
And yell at your neighbor. So, no, Southwest is trying to rejuvenate itself. Now, a woman, this was from Philly to Chicago. Nothing but class. I feel like I can see this woman in my mind. This woman took off her pants. Yeah. Stripped down naked. Fully nude. Yes. And shart pants. Took a full shit on a plane seat while it was landing. Hey, you know what? At least she waited to the landing. Yeah.
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Side Stories: The R Train
Well, that's the time when you're surfing. You never do bus surfing. You're in the aisle and you try not to touch anything. You're just surfing. You're just trying to do it. She was doing that, but on her seat while the plane's landing. I feel like it's something else. I'm just saying, I'm impressed she was able to shit
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: The R Train
while it was landing i think that you think she was holding on to the back of the seat yes i also feel like at this point staring into someone's eyes very much so and i think that because you know what i'd do in this scenario what nothing oh no i mean what are you gonna do i would if i sat next to this woman please don't please please yeah and that's it that's as far as i that's as far as i go i would just stare forward i would just not react i'm just like
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: The R Train
Let this plane land. Let this plane land. All I want to do is exit this plane. That's it. I don't need to. You know what? I'll live with it. I'll live with this woman's cloaca-sheared shit. No, that's not the woman.
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Side Stories: The R Train
I just saw another naked plane. You know, ah, God. I just... Ladies being naked on planes. This is another Southwest flight from a month ago. Oh, wow. Where she just stripped nude and walked around. Man, I don't know. You're going to spend this much money and fuck it all up?
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Yeah. It's not like flights are cheap. No. And then you're definitely going to jail.
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Yes. Do people go crazy in the air and I just don't know about it? Well, one thing that is certain is we know that alcoholic drinks have an exaggerated effect when you're in the air. And people do tend to get real fucking lit up before getting on the plane. Yeah. Which is not, I find it to be one of the worst ideas possible. You just get sick on the plane. Yeah.
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Side Stories: The R Train
Ever tell you about the woman I saw who got like fucking hammered at the bar? And I remember clocking her at the bar and being like, that chick's getting hammered. And then I saw her get on my plane. And then in the middle of the flight, she just attacked the woman next to her, just started scratching her.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: The R Train
And then the poor, like, steward had to, like, hold her down for an hour so we didn't have to land in some random city. You know, that's what's great. Flight attendant.
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I saw her. I was like, I clocked that shit. And she was getting hammered with that chick back there. And so I ratted her out.
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Yeah, second show's almost sold out, so come and get those tickets.
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You fucking narc. You fucking stoolie bitch. $50 United bucks. $50 to any poods, baby.
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You know, I get it, though. I get it. There's got to be some justice in this world. You know, she's, it's just, I don't get it. I'll never get it. But hey, I'm also serene. It's so weird. I used to like, I had the drink when I got on flights. Now it's just like a burden. Well, I like a truly favorite, super hungover, very early morning flight, one drink, I'm pass out.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: The R Train
I do, I raw dog flights all the time. That's wild. No music, no movies. I just sit there. Straight ahead. Yep. Why do you do that? I don't know. What do you think about? Oh, so all sorts of things. Yeah. You just get angry sometimes. Sometimes I get sad. Oh, okay. Sometimes I laugh. Oh, thank God. Sometimes I think about stuff. Sometimes in my head, I'm so.
Last Podcast On The Left
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I think if you just start laughing, that's terrifying. You're odd-dogging it for two hours, and all of a sudden you just start giggling? Yeah.
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This is a funny part right here. I love this movie. Just watching the flight tracker. I put that on. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha. Ha, ha, ha. They think we're making it to Phoenix. Go left. Left. Shit. No, you know what it is? Sometimes I just don't want to choose a thing to listen to or watch. Sometimes I'm so weighed down by the burden of that choice that I'd rather just sit there.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: The R Train
And now I got your stupid fruit immersion game. I love my fruit game. So I do the stupid fruit game. It's good. It's good at not thinking.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: The R Train
I appreciate that. One other thing I wanted to talk about. I don't know what the fuck is going on with this story. I want to know what you guys say. Side stories, LPOTL to gmail.com. The Connecticut Cannibal. Oh, yeah. A man by the name of Tyree Smith. Have you heard of this man? No. Okay. Connecticut Valley Hospital. He was in, I guess, in a hospital for the... criminally insane or whatever.
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Side Stories: The R Train
He's in one of those. He was accused of hacking a man to death with an axe and bridge port and then eating part of the victim's brain and his eyeball. His roommate. His roommate. Yeah. Somehow... Man-Man was an angel. I believe that he was... I have no idea what's going on.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: The R Train
Oh! We got the footage, bro! Well, I had, first of all, I just want to say, I got really good feedback from one of the most precious, long-time...
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I know that they're obviously... This is one of those... I hate stumbling into a thing where we're not talking about Republican talking points here. I just don't understand how he was allowed to get out on conditional release. So he's released. They're saying he's stable. He's done. He's completely ready to go. Not crazy at all.
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Side Stories: The R Train
He's being released. We beat a man to death and sucked out his eyeball and ate a chunk of his brain. Yeah. And now it's just like, all right, you've learned your lesson. You get out there. Why don't you work for Chipotle? You mean like, I don't know what this guy's going to go do. What is the Connecticut cannibal? I don't think you should be a cook.
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a mess he's amazing like what does he do i feel like again i'm fine with it's a conditional release so he might end up back in they're in like a halfway house i just don't even know how the hell he was even allowed to have a conditional release because part of me i really do believe in the idea of you must if we're going to rehabilitate people If we're going to let people back out.
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Side Stories: The R Train
And I want there to be an immediate portal for them to go into. I love the idea of them having some form of vocational training within jail or education or something like that that allows them to leave jail and do stuff. Be able to leave prison, have a job, be a cook, barber. Those types of skilled labors that don't require advanced degrees is extremely good work. work for somebody.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: The R Train
But he was found officially not guilty by insanity. So that's what, I guess that's the real difference here. And I feel like I'd love to actually have somebody explain that to me. Side stories, LPOTL at gmail.com. Because I'd love to know Because what I've heard about getting not guilty by reasons of insanity is that oftentimes it is way worse than going to jail.
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fans of this show that is close to me and told me and i i hear her i heard her and i'm absorbing her yeah and she said that she felt that we were coming a little hard at jillian shiner uh said we were kind of maybe insinuating some stuff about the the then this is the wife of the bassist of weezer yeah uh what's his name his name's like stymie shiner steve shiner sean shiner Shiner Brothers.
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I guess that's the wrong thing to say. I mean, I think that it's appropriate for that. I think that you can call where they're going the loony bin. It's like a place for the criminally insane. That type of place. I guess the loony bin's too cute. Let's call it. So you know who, in my mind, it's like Martin Bryant. Yes. He's in the loony bin. Yes. You know what I mean?
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Like, that guy's in the loony bin. There's another guy. It was like all of those guys. Like, people, real supervillains are in the loony bin. This guy was, like, put into this scenario. But what I've heard is that they can sort of keep you indefinitely, like you are supposed to be there. But it's like, how can you tell when some guy's like... Listen, it was a rough month for me.
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Totally not a cannibal anymore. And it's like, how do you tell? How do you tell? Well, you got to put an eyeball in front of him and see if he sucks it up.
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That's all I do. I just want a little bit of taste of it. He's sucking on his own fingers. I'm gross. Yeah. I want a hot woman. Come on, brain. Roommate's brain. Yeah. I mean, brain. I don't think a brain would be the first part I ate. You should never eat a man's brain. No. Ever. It's extremely bad. That's how you get one of those fucking crazy prion diseases.
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You shouldn't really be eating any brain, but if you are going to be eating brain, it needs to be very well cooked. We've had sweetbreads. Sweetbreads is other glands. Oh, I thought that was brain. No, that's the thalamus gland. That's like these things. Oh. Yeah, yeah. This whole time I thought I was eating brain. No, I've had brain. When you're eating brain, they tell you it's brain. Oh, okay.
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I thought they were just trying to skirt around it being brain and calling it sweetbread. They were calling it something else that's just as gross. Technically, it is the thymus or pancreatic glands of certain animals. Okay. Yeah, so it is gross, but they are way tastier than brains. I think brains are actually really gross. Now that I know I'm eating pancreas... Let's have some poppers, man.
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Man, I love sweetbreads. Yeah. I love sweetbreads. So brain's just called fried brain? Oh, yeah. So when you ordered brain, you were like, I'll take the brain, please? Yes. I've had lamb's brain. Really? Yes. I've also had- Where do you do this? That was at a place in Atlanta. That was at one of my favorite places, Holman and Finch. I've had- Where do you went to a place? What was it called? Meat?
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Meat. Animal. Animal. That was a while ago. I don't even know if it's still around. No, it's gone. It's gone. Stuff like that. I also like brain is very classically served with eggs. So they make brain and egg tacos quite often where they will cook up brain with eggs because they're actually very similar. Cooked brain is referred to as sweetbreads. Specifically calf or lamb brain?
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I mean, I feel like this is Google AI. We've got to stop using Google AI. It's a mixture of different sources here. Okay, all right, all right, all right. Yes, most of the time there's a lot of brain. Yeah, it's a lot of brain. People do a lot of brain. I don't mind you using all of the animal, but it has to be very well cooked.
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I hope that this was his learnedest lesson and he's over it.
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You know what, bud? If you're listening and you're in Connecticut, I hear the pizza's great.
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New Haven's supposed to have the best pizza. He's in Bridgeport. Ugh. Take the bus over to New Haven, and then what you do is get over there, and that's where you should focus your eating habits on.
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Congrats. I know they've been fighting for that for a while. It's just so hard. You know what's great about a first cousin? It's like they're made to be fuckable for you specifically because they're in your family. Yeah, you're the puzzle pieces. There are stipulations. What the fuck is this? I thought this was America.
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I love Stiney Shiner. Stimey Shiner is my favorite guy. Yeah. And his wife, Shiner Glock. I love her. But, you know, we kind of came a little bit hard about, you know, kind of saying that she's like, but honestly, I really looked into it and I talked with my friend. And it's true. Jillian Shiner was doing some really, really great work within the true crime community. She was out there.
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So fucking gross. Or if both are 55 and unable to reproduce. Oh, great. So if you're 55 and sterile, you can marry your first cousin. So this whole thing is based off a bunch of shithead 80-year-old pedophile senators that are all like, the difference is we can't make no web feed mongrels.
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That's what we can't have. We can't have simpletons walking around with bat wings and four arms.
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Yeah. I've known my cousin my whole life. I put my time in. I am allowed. And normally, my cousin and I, we stick to oral sex so that no procreation can be done because I agree.
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I don't want a child with a fin. I don't want a child with a pterodactyl's protuberance that allows him to whistle and create a sound that can cascade for miles. What I need is the ability to fuck my... And that's the issue here, right? Now, y'all know me. That's the issue here. Is we don't want no web feed. Yeah. So let's just have an agreement.
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I'm going to say the vagina graveyard is empty of eggs. The ghosts are allowed back in the cemetery. You know what I mean? That's right. That's right. The spooky, spooky ghosts filling up the ghost cemetery. Once all the skeletons are out of that lady's vaginal cemetery, you could fill up all those caskets and every divot with as much liquid ghost as you could make.
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They are dead. Oh, yeah. They are dead. They are not moving. I guess it's not, though. Cum. Yeah. Cum never dies. Well, I mean, if you can't, I mean, would he just be shooting dead sperm? No, it's the opposite. It's that it's also interesting is that it's still pressure on the female cousin fucker to not be able to have babies anymore.
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Oh, because this is definitely not about this is not condomless sex with a cousin. Yeah, that's what this is about. Right. This is about not having to worry about it. Right. And so you could just jazz inside there. But the thing is, is that you're coming come lives for forever. Tony Randall had babies until he was like eighty three. I mean, De Niro and Pacino just had babies. Oh, yeah, absolutely.
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Of course, their babies are half ghost. Yes. They come out with little gray beards. The kid's going to be 10 when they die. Well, that's the goal. Honestly, in the end, by that point, it's fine. Then by that point, you don't want them around anymore. Yeah.
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You know, in Utah, you can also marry a minor. Oh, that's so nice for the entire... Not someone who digs.
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Oh. No, a child. Because that actually comes from my... I have a joke about that. Yeah, you could be 16 or 17 years old. You want a preview of a little of my stand-up? I had a little stand-up idea the other day. Oh, nice. This is what I decided to write. I have a couple of stand-up ideas. Okay, let's do it. Ladies and gentlemen, coming to the stage, Henry Zabrowski. We're hitting the road.
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Not yet. Not yet. You're going to be 41. Yes, but I've been sick for days. Yes.
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I decided to write this down. Every time I see young female teacher rapes minor, first thing I think, damn, she got through all them leather vests. Leather vests. Like a miner's protective clothing. They don't have leather vests. They got, like, jeans and, like, overalls. And, like, you know, like... It's not a well-thought-out... Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's not a well-thought-out setup.
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It's not a well-thought-out punchline. I would say got through all the soot. I think soot is a good one. Writing it down.
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What was she doing? She did a book about Samuel Little, the serial killer, that she apparently was the one that got him to confess. Oh. And basically talk about the, he said he had a photographic memory and he was painting pictures of the various sex workers that he had killed in the various decades that he was a serial killer. We've never covered him, right?
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Oh, and that's so, you can't even get that. So that's got to be so, I mean, good for the kids. That's finally some freedom. Senator Jen Plum is actually sponsoring a bill right now to change all of that.
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A 16-year-old. A 16-year-old can marry a 23-year-old. A 17-year-old can marry a 24-year-old. Why are you telling me what to do? If they get a signed permission slip. Why is anybody telling me what to do ever? Why not 18? Just wait. Because that's when they're old and gross, Eddie. You're right. 16 is when they're perfect. That is when you want a wife.
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They're the most reasonable, and that's exactly... And they're great decision makers. And 16-year-olds are also so interesting.
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They have so many thoughts to say. Yeah, wow, there's 19 U.S. states it's legal to marry a first cousin. Really?
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Okay. And in Vermont. And Utah's not on the list. Not in any... Soon to be added. Soon to be added. Yeah. That makes 20. 20 states. It's going up. Wow. People say that we are fucking sliding into a fucking crevice. California's on the list. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Well, it's because we got hotter cousins here. That's right.
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Now, speaking of sliding into the crevice, I also want to give an opportunity to our people. So we're about to wrap up today's episode. I didn't get some letters, but... It's hard out there right now. Yeah. Economically, people are suffering. Especially deep within our rust belt in the Midwest. So I want to give a big shout out to the listeners in the Lansing area.
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I want to let you know, Saturday, May 17th, Deja Vu Showgirls, the prettiest butthole in Michigan competition is beginning. Fuck, we missed it? There? No. 17th, dude.
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But it's coming up. No, but we haven't missed it yet. The celebrity guest host, Jason.
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How clean could the cleanest butthole in Michigan be? Prettiest. Oh, prettiest. Prettiest butthole in Michigan competition. It is Saturday, May 17th over at Deja Vu Showgirls. The celebrity guest hosts Jason Vest and Yiddy Lunch. I never heard of them. Who is some? Not Kid Rock. Oh, it's a... Who is Yiddy Lunch? Oh, interesting. It's a man. No, that one, that contestant was a man.
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I think that Yiddy Lunch was... Is this a male strip club? No, I don't know. There's a woman getting real close to that butthole with a camera. Well, that's just because, again, she is the person doing the footage. Interesting. So this is Giddy Lunch, which I do believe he was on something. He's on a couple of these. He did Prettiest Butthole in Michigan, I guess.
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No, because there's really not a heck of a lot to the story. We know that he's a very mean, mad man. He's very big. He was a semi-pro boxer. This all sounds incredible to me. But then he's a serial killer of sex workers. Yeah. Well, I mean, for the show, it's incredible. But not enough. We don't know enough. Yeah? About it. We just know those things. And they all come from his mouth.
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last year oh okay so this is last year they did at the deja vu showgirls lansing i want to see who won the pink package is uh five hundred dollars see the you have two level of tickets here obviously we don't want to cut into our own ticket sales but the pre-sale ticket is only a thirty dollar ticket that's just for admission but you can get the pink package for five guests with five hundred dollars sold the package oh the whole the whole show sold you have to you have to be a contestant
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Oh, you could be a judge for five grand. Five grand, you're going to be a judge. It is, but the VIP seating allows you to get up close. It's sold out. Wow. The pink package is sold out. And guess what you get? You get also a meet and greet with the winner of the competition.
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Now, the reason why we're even talking about this is obviously Jodi Arias has one of the nicest buttholes in all of true crime, but I wonder... But she's in Arizona. She's incarcerated. She can't get there. And so, who do we think... In true crime, currently, what we put up for the prettiest butthole in Michigan. In Michigan. I don't even know who commits crimes in Michigan. A lot of people.
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Yeah, yeah, yeah. I would say prettiest butthole in Michigan. Bob Seger's niece. Ugh, Eddie. Just the term niece. Just the term niece.
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Yeah, I imagine. All right, celebrities from Michigan.
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Selma Blair. Selma Blair's got a great butthole. Madonna definitely has got a great butthole. I don't know if Madonna currently has a great butthole. I bet you her butthole now is probably more refurbished than ever. Vern Troyer's dead. I'm sorry. But honestly, though, if it wasn't Vern Troyer, it would be my number one choice.
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Elaine Stritch? Are you Elaine Stritch? Yeah, the ladies do lunch.
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Everybody laughs. Eminem has a very beautiful butthole. I think Anthony Kiedis' child bride. Dax Shepard? I mean, how do you beat Dax Shepard? He is the prettiest asshole in podcasting. I imagine if there was one beautiful asshole in podcasting, Stevie Wonder does not have a nice asshole. Yes, he does. He doesn't know if it's clean or not. Yes, he does.
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He has people who watch, and he's been doing it enough. We now know, right? Eddie, what did we learn from Motown? We went to the Motown Museum. Yes. And we learned that Stevie Wonder, the guy that started Motown, innocent guy.
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He definitely, he set up this thing where they had a house where the guy, one of the guys that was on the crew would go ahead of time to the places the original Motown performers were going to perform live.
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Yes, and so they would get everybody used to the stage. And one of the ways they taught young Stevie Wonder how to do stuff was that they would set up the stage inside of this house to the letter and show him this is how many steps it takes to get to the stairs.
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This is the steps to get to the chair. And so he would work it and work it to the point which started the conspiracy theories that Stevie Wonder could see, right? All this stuff, which I still believe he could see. I utterly believe he could see. But I think that's a part of it. And I also think that you wipe your butthole for this long and you're blind. I bet you. Sidestories, LPOTL at gmail.com.
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Samuel Little is also one of the least dependable of them, as far as I'm concerned.
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My blind listeners. How clean is your butthole? I bet you. They don't know. No, I bet you their buttholes are cleaner than anybody else because their fingers are more sensitive. And they can smell it. Their sense of smell is better than ours. I mean, I don't know. That's a very daredevil way. They can be like, oh, it doesn't smell like shit.
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That's very... I still think Dax Shepard has the prettiest asshole in Michigan. Send your vote in. Oh, Richard Kiel. Oh, yes. The guy from Jaws from The Spy Who Loved Me and Moonraker. Man, you know Jack White's asshole is a mess. Oh, I want nowhere near Jack White's asshole. That is a dirty, dirty asshole. I want nowhere near that asshole. Chris Webber, fucking and one.
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Same time, though, I weirdly think that Swish. Elaine Stritch. She might not have that bad of an asshole from back in the day. I think Elaine Stritch probably was a wonder. She was in theater. Unless she had the big old roids. Yeah.
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Ladies who lunch. Hopefully that lunch included some salads. Stritch me, baby. Let's get some letters. Number one, got a lot of pushback about our friend Captain Ron talking about the telepathy tapes. I do agree. I started listening to the telepathy tapes. Part of what they're saying is that they do believe that extremely autistic, nonverbal autistic people can communicate telepathically.
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There is some, like... It's so hard because at the very end of the series, it's like some things are interesting. The idea that maybe close family bonds, that can create some kind of telepathic communication. The idea that we don't understand what consciousness is. We don't know where it comes from. I still believe that that's a big question.
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We don't really know what makes us us and why we are us and where we come from. Literally, where do our personalities come from? But then it starts going into the idea that nonverbal autistic people can predict the future. What if some of them can? I mean, I hope. And then where were they? Where were they then? They were screaming and no one listened. Exactly.
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But then there is also some people that believe that they're talking to ghosts. So it kind of goes off the rails a little bit. But, you know, it's not... It's very popular. They're going to speak at contact. We should... Go and watch. We should challenge them. I don't know about that. I should be like, what am I thinking? Oh, scan me. Scan me.
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What am I thinking? There's that. We've got the mummified pope. Quick story. While I was in high school, we took a class trip to Europe, and one of our stops was Vatican City. It was the creepiest, most uncomfortable place I've ever visited.
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It's very, very possible. But Gillian Shiner was a really good. She worked really hard. Now, the reason why we talked about her is because there was a high speed chase that went through their very fancy neighborhood in Los Angeles.
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The combination of the giant walls surrounding the city trapping us inside, my Catholic guilt, even at a young age, I knew it was all bullshit, and the fact that every single person there seemed miserable... I truly felt sick. The most interesting, surprising part of the visit was going down into the catacombs underneath the cathedral.
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There were grottos carved out into these walls where, I shit you not, the mummified corpses of the former popes were displayed behind glass. Cool. You're not supposed to take photographs down there, but I did manage to sneak one because I knew that my friends back home wouldn't believe this wild tale. No, I believe it. They said they attached it, but it's not here. It's in the other email.
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You ain't getting it. I want to see it. I'll show it to you. I want to see a dead pope. Yeah, I'll show you one. I can look it up. Thank you. In a month. I'll show you another one. Oh, we're going to have a 30-day pope. Yep. I'm going to show you another one, man. Look, there's one. Okay. Well, that's the newest one, right? That's the last one. That's the hot shit.
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That's the hot new Pope. Yum, yum. Hot new dead Pope. Oh, yeah. Watch out. Don't put him on the New York subway.
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It's probably still take three guys to steal all the stuff off of his body, but it still would only take one. I call the yarmulke. Yep. I want his little shoes. I love the little shoes. The little shoes are my favorite one. I love the little tiny shoes. But yeah, so a lot of people. We'll stop talking about the Pope soon, guys. Yeah. I promise. And then we have this last little story.
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It's really got nothing to do with the show, but it works. All right, let me hear it. Have you ever asked the question, could I fight that goose? You now have a point of reference for how badass the goose are. Recently, a wild Canadian goose flew into an open-air tiger habitat at the Columbus Zoo. Okay. This happens pretty frequently.
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There's always a mallard duck or two mixed in with the flamingos. In cases where native wildlife interact with predators, it usually results in some unplanned culinary enrichment, as the keepers would say. However, when this tiger thought they found a snack, they wound up with a face full of feathered fury. The goose dodged swipes until they figured out to flap their attacker away.
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The tiger ran the other way, and zookeepers later confirmed there were no signs of the goose left in the habitat. Wow. That fucking goose put that shit down, dude. Goose fuck you up. The tiger wanted nothing to do with the goose. Oh, it's just a friendly tiger. No, it's a hungry tiger. It doesn't understand what the problem is with this fucking goose.
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I don't think it was trying to eat it as much as it was just trying to play with it. And then the goose came after it. Sounds like the goose was really escalating the scenario.
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Now it is. Okay. I guess if Weezer's living there, it's got to be kind of fancy. They've got great houses. They really do have great houses. It's a bit crunchy for me. It's not my style.
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Yeah, goose literally slapped the shit out of him. Man, that tiger's a pussy. I feel bad for the tiger. I feel like the tiger could have taken out that goose. Someone should shoot that goose in the head and feed it to the tiger. Come on. Let's nature rebalance itself. Goose suck. Yeah, they are horrible.
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I hate all goose. Oh, God, Eddie. Wow, we've made it to the end of an episode. Happy birthday. Wow, it really feels like it. Happy, happy, happy birthday.
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Oh, Rob got you a birthday. He got me, and Robert, you got me an eclair. A birthday eclair. Oh, Rob.
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But now what we have seen is that we know that last week, right before Weezer headlined Coachella, they went and she inserted herself, it seemed to be, in the hunt for these people that were running from a high-speed chase that were armed. She herself was armed. She was in her front yard of her home while the police were looking for the suspects.
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Buy tickets to one of the things. The foreign report. The foreign report. Oh, yeah, the guy's own YouTube channel. You gotta love every day. No one for a fact. We're migrating. I think it was his own YouTube channel.
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And you gotta laugh. No one for a fact. These guys try and understand how the algorithm works. Yeah, for 15 years in the business. Oh, also... You're going to live on the fact that the Foreign Report is the best.
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Go to lastpodcastandleft.com. Buy all our tickets everywhere. Yeah. No. Also, last puppy benefit on the left. This has happened very quickly. We put this together. We are doing a benefit for the dogs and families and pets.
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Yes, we are going to just a little bit of an example of what this is. We are come out to the Masonic Theater in Los Angeles at the Hollywood Forever Cemetery. May 23rd. What we are doing is a it's a benefit for puppies and pets and the families affected during the wildfires that had pets and puppies that needed that were displaced. Yes. It's not just for puppies.
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It's for all dogs, but we're going to have puppies there for you to play with, and so that's going to be a lot of fun. This is the key. It's us and puppies. So this is like... I mean this. You're going to flip out over this shit. It's only $40. It all goes to charity. For an hour, you get to just hang out with puppies and us. And there's a food truck, but the food truck serves normal food. Yes.
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Not dog food. Yeah. And then... We did not fully know that we were going to be doing this, but we're going to be doing a full, like, show thing. Yeah, we're doing a full thing. We're doing a full thing there, too. So, and it's not the live show that we're doing.
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Yeah, I think so. You come out to this, it is going to be...
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Let me take care of this. Pups Without Borders is the people we're working with and also the Masonic Lodge in Hollywood forever. Thank you all of you for helping us put this together. We are going to save some dogs. All right, we're going to it.
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Toto is buried at the cemetery. We're going to save some dogs. We're going to dig him up. All four of them. We got Toto two. 3, 7, and 11 are buried there. Yes, that's correct. Also, just remember, Flipper committed suicide on my birthday.
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Yeah, I mean, he was not... He was in a good mood.
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Oh, I forgot to talk about the mud fossil stuff. We'll get into that next week.
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God, that's such a good idea. Such a good idea. It'd be filled with crabs. Well, we love you. We'll see you on the Patreon, huh? Come see us. Earn this. Earn this.
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She had the gun out and she was gesturing with the gun. The police then apparently shot her in the exchange. We now have the body cam footage. And when you watch it, you really can't see. She really was quite confident with the handgun and the police. And I'm just going to put this out there for anybody. This is no longer a, I'm not trashing this woman.
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She seemed to be scared slash righteous slash. She made a, she does not seem scared. She seems like she's very much in charge of her yard. Yes. And she has the gun and she... The problem is that the police officers all go, put the gun down, put the gun down, put the gun down, over and over again. You hear them communicating amongst each other. And then she said, you put your fucking gun down.
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Yes. And I was coughing. You were coughing and sniffling. And sniffling a bunch, but I still came to work because I care about you and I care about this job. But then he went to go to the- I went and saw the Grateful Dead at the Sphere.
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Which is, again, I'm just going to say... No judge around a character. You're just going to want to be really careful when you have a gun and the police are there and they have their guns. Because the thing about police is that they're jumpy. And they are not ready. They're not ready. Most of them are not ready. They're not well trained.
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So I actually got a reach out from, as we talked about it, because I said maybe the cops were pulling it away because we know that she was only injured because they open up fire on her. They shot a bunch of times. They're either... exercising her white privilege, or... Horrible shots. Because they shot like, what, eight times? And one of the hardest parts is that she does shoot first.
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It does seem as if she pops off a shot as well. She lifts the gun. They found a bullet casing from her gun that was also expelled. So this was a very bad scenario. Is she going to go to prison for attempted murder of a police officer? Right now, they don't know what to do. Because that's like, I don't know, you shoot a gun at a cop, you're trying to kill him, right? Yeah. It's... Eddie.
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I know we're trying to be nice to this woman, because you have a friend of a friend, but at the same time, she fired a gun at a cop, and that seems like attempted murder. Oh, I'm going to say that. I'm going to say it's a big old mistake. Whatever it is, it's a big old mistake. But this officer that reached out to me said, we should be lucky.
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She should be lucky that they are so poorly trained, because they are not supposed to just wing you. Yeah. They are supposed to riddle you with bullets. And the problem is that she wasn't.
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Everybody's sick. Not me. No, he's fine. I'm going to be sick for a break.
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You'll love it. It's already passed. It's already passed. Stay patient. Yay. Yeah, she got real lucky that they weren't well trained because she should be a corpse. And because they did be definitely sprayer with bullets. Yeah. Or sprayed the yard with bullets.
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So I didn't really get completely better. What did you do all weekend? I laid in my filth. Hell yeah, man. I watched, I played BG3. You got a new girlfriend. I did get a new girlfriend at Baldur's Gate. Yeah. I'm fucking Laizel as well. I'm having sex with Shadowheart. She's more kind of my emotional girlfriend. Laizel and I are kind of more of a- She don't do shit.
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And I tell you what, I feel like there's a couple other scenarios where if they did happen to spray everybody with bullets, it would have made things a lot more black and white. And we actually maybe could have dealt with that. Do you think they knew who she was? I know that they knew that she was a rich lady in a yard packing a gun. Yeah.
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In the middle of an active investigation that she was involving herself in. And technically, normally what would happen, they would either get you for obstruction, right? They go and they'd be like, you know, they come and they rile you up. And most of the time when they get you for obstruction, it's just to... cool you out. And a lot of times they'll just let you go.
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A lot of times if you show up at a crime scene and start yelling and screaming one police officer will eventually I can't wait until I get to do that.
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And so they pop you in the back a lot of times they'll, depending again it might depend on what color you are but they pop you in the back of a car and they decide whether or not they're going to press charges against you. If you're just fucking up the everyday kind of investigation A lot of times they let you go.
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A lot of times they just want you out of the way and then they get ready because it's hard to charge with obstruction. Yeah, because it's opinion. Yes, and it's like a nothing burger charge. It's like that doesn't do anything. So they just kind of do it as an excuse to get you out of the situation. She might get charged with obstruction because of this. They might throw away the attempted murder.
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At the bare minimum. and give her obstruction to be nice. If she gets no obstruction, firing a gun at a cop during a chase, I don't know, that might as well cause riots in this city.
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There was a date in January several years ago in which we kind of see the same thing happen, where the police are coming across a group of people that seem to be, let's just say they were storming a house that was white.
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And they said, hey, they scanned the crowd and instead of doing probably what they would have done in any other aspect, unless, of course, they were told to not open fire on them ahead of time because it was all a setup. They also then should have probably. killed all of those guys in order to set the precedent that you don't do that.
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But then it seems that that caused a lot of problems, as we can see. That's kind of a constant rolling effect ever since then. So it's interesting in some points where you don't want the police to use successive force. Most of the time, you really don't. Most of the time, I'm praying for de-escalation. No one should get shot by the police if you don't absolutely have to.
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I don't want anyone to ever get shot by any cops or by anybody. I believe police should have goo guns and net guns. Legitimately. That would be cool. I don't really know why we don't. I know we have them for crowd control. I think technically something like a giant staying foam spray would be really good for a bunch of insurrectionists. At least keep it in the trunk.
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Yeah, because then it's like, you don't necessarily have to kill them. You just got to kind of, someone has to come and clean them all up and arrest them. Shotgun with salt bullets could be cool. A lot of ways to do it, Eddie. There's a lot of ways to discourage lots of different things without death. A gun that's just got like a big boxing glove at the end of it?
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Or just a thing that just says like... Hey, you look gay. You know what I mean? Like a speaker that just, hey, you're looking gay. It freezes these guys. Me? Yeah, yeah, yeah, exactly. It freezes them. And so it's like, I feel like there's that. But then during sometimes you wonder why they didn't use successive force and it seems to be another way for them to politically manipulate the situation.
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Yeah. That's just my little opinion. And what do I know? I'm a fat piece of shit. Amen. So let's go.
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hope i don't have pneumonia i am dying you've oh well so she got released there you have old monia i have old monia it's definitely not the new monia um no yeah she is released on one million dollars bonds okay you only get to pay in 10 so she had 100 grand cash but i hope that this serves as a wake-up call yeah and then she can get back to the good work
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No, no. She's working very hard. She's Laizel. No, she's not lazy as hell. That is a contraction. Laizel is a Githyanki name.
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Very much so. No one's happy with her. Maybe she can pick up some trash next to the highway or something. I think that you're going to have to charge her. Unfortunately, I'm not into it. I don't think the cops are in the business of making it OK to shoot at them occasionally.
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It feels like now that that new executive order got signed, the police can call upon the military to come help them at any point. It's going to be interesting. It's interesting because they're already armed with all our old military. So now they'll get the old stuff and the new stuff. That's really cool. Oh yeah. Good for them. Also, we got another great update.
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Uh, so Lori Vallow was allowed to comment upon her guilty. Oh, uh, she got, you know, obviously she got convicted of, she's already been convicted of killing her children and Tammy Daybell. This time she was convicted in the murder of conspiracy to murder Charles Vallow, her husband, her ex-husband. And she, She was allowed to talk on camera, and it's the most horrible travesty ever.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: The R Train
What is it, like a webcam? No, it's a real reporter. There's a big irresponsible thing that I saw with this Lori Vallow trial that I don't really understand, where everyone started talking to the jury immediately. This is how you get shit thrown out. Yeah, well, it's already happened, though. The verdict came in.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: The R Train
But you can get your shit thrown out on appeal very easily if a juror slips and says something after the fact along the lines of, I heard X, Y, Z. Or one of them came out the first thing out of his fucking mouth. There's one guy. There's always one. There's always one, which I'm a little jealous of because I want to be this guy. Yes, but there's one guy.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Breast Friends
That's right. Whoa, Robert. Hey. I know you're a sailor. But can't.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Breast Friends
It's a regular Raggedy Ann doll. She could be 10 places at once, as far as I'm concerned.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Breast Friends
Just wants to go back to being a normal judge again.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Breast Friends
Do you have that picture, Rob? Let me throw that picture up real quick. Yeah, you want to look at it? So basically, I'm looking at it right now. So basically, this guy's middle finger was stripped. The meat was stripped off, and it's just the bone. And the bone needs blood to live, because the bone is also alive. The bone is alive.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Breast Friends
And so what they did was they grafted a bunch of the stomach skin around this guy's finger. Go down. And then they attached it to him and while it grew back around, so he's going to have like a weird formless middle finger, which will be so much more insulting.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Breast Friends
It's like, oh, baby, would you like less finger?
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Breast Friends
No one ever hits her with the Roman. Does yours go backwards? Because if it doesn't go backwards, I'm supposed to not trust you. Okay, good. Yeah. What? Did you ever hear that? If your thumb doesn't go backwards, you're supposed to not trust that person. What the fuck? If your thumb just goes straight up, they're supposed to be evil. Is this stuff you learned in prison?
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Breast Friends
This is stuff my mom taught me. She said, don't trust people that their thumb doesn't go backwards. She's a very superstition woman.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Breast Friends
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Rob, does your thumb go backwards?
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Breast Friends
They use leeches also to suck the blood out. If they put the skin around the bone and there's no meat in there, it gets filled with old blood. And the only way to get the old blood out is to have medical leeches. And sometimes you have to get special medical leeches that have to be flown in like organs. Wow. Which is cool.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Breast Friends
They're good. They're fine. There's no definition.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Breast Friends
These are actually typo negative. If you could.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Breast Friends
Yeah, we're not doctors. But apparently you can just reattach. You can sew it to the finger next to it sometimes, sometimes the palm. And it'll regrow once you sew it to another part of your body. And then once it regrows, you detach it and you got a finger again. Good Lord. So that's fucking cool.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Breast Friends
I had a meeting with a financial advisor who told me to get into crypto, and I just stopped talking to him.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Breast Friends
I feel like when you start dealing in crypto, you start dealing with weird internet criminals somehow.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Breast Friends
But also, other side of it, I just thought of this. Fuck the bank. Yeah, fuck the bank. Fuck the bank. Why am I trusting the bank?
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Breast Friends
They hate me more than crypto hates me. I hate both.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Breast Friends
I mean, that's the thing. Especially that pro rate. I don't want to be this kind of guy, but Italians are going to escape. They're slippery. Yeah. They're going to get out of there. They just have like a professional like prison prison. Titans are getting out.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Breast Friends
They're good. I'm very hungry. But, you know, we don't eat here at Last Podcast and the Left. We won't.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Breast Friends
Yeah. Also, I want to say Waltz, when they arrested him, they arrested him in his bathrobe and he perp walked him outside of his fancy apartment and his dick came out. Yeah, it's kind of funny. That's all TMZ is saying about the story.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Breast Friends
Can I ask you this question about kidnapping, hypothetically? Sure. So you have someone kidnapped in your house for two weeks. Yep. What a hassle. What are you feeding them? You got to feed them something if you want to keep them alive.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Breast Friends
You know what I'd get? I would just get what I get and then probably an appetizer too and he can have whatever's left. Wow. Yeah.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Breast Friends
Yeah. Oh, no, man. That's good. That's good eating. I eat plenty. I probably keep him fed. That's how Julie eats.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Breast Friends
Crypto is like the way to make money if you are just independently wealthy and never have any experience, you know, no proper education.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Breast Friends
Yeah. And if you like crypto, good for you. I mean, yeah.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Breast Friends
Oh, God. I was just like, what a waste. You fucking jerks. Listen, sorry about that, everyone. I just get so mad when it comes to useless money stuff. Listen, we have another prison break. Oh, great. This guy is very interesting. It's not a long story, but this guy, former police chief serving for murder and rape sentences, escaped from an Arkansas prison.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Breast Friends
refreshing but it's also probably how serious whatever the the the attack was it was in 1997 uh there isn't much information on it but the man's name is grant harding he's a big scary kingpin looking motherfucker he does look like i don't know what he's like apparently taken he's they call him the devil in the ozarks uh he's a very scary dude he was police chief for a couple of months and then immediately got locked up for murder and rape
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Breast Friends
I hate to break it to you. She's not your age. Come on. Everyone is. She's younger than you.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Breast Friends
No, it's not. It's much different. It's much different. She's 10 years younger than you. So deal with that. I think she's beautiful.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Breast Friends
What happened? What are you talking about? Do you want to scale it back a little bit? Because I can scale it back.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Breast Friends
They said he's taken to the woods, and eventually he's going to run out of supplies. And it's hard. The land that he's taken to, he's like Rambo. It's very rocky, and they can't get up there. They can't get the dogs up there.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Breast Friends
once i'm done with this lash slits yeah but a lot of people turned on him and so they're and they're very scared that he's gonna come uh yeah he's a murderist and a rapist and a former fucking sheriff dude yeah yeah he's a dangerous man he's a sheriff oh yeah and he did it to a teacher too which is always the worst but you know and there was a documentary uh about him in 2023 so now they get to make another episode
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Breast Friends
Anytime you say anything that's really upsetting, just touch the World Trade Center effigy for thankful.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Breast Friends
We used to do that in the roast writer room. Whenever someone said a joke that was way too awful, you'd just touch the table and say apologize. I'm sorry. And then all is forgiven and then you move on.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Breast Friends
Yes, comedy goes really well in the middle of a conference hall.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Breast Friends
You know who the new Taylor Swift is? Kendrick. Kendrick took it.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Breast Friends
Of course, but he took it. That's what I'm saying. He took over. She had the Heiress tour, and now his tour with SZA is fucking way bigger. I couldn't afford it. Yeah. I really wanted to go, and I just couldn't. It was like thousands.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Breast Friends
You know, but how stoned do you think you've got to get to eat French pizza?
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Breast Friends
You see the French president or premier, whatever the fuck he is, prime minister.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Breast Friends
I remember French bread pizza was given to me as a lie when I was a child.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Breast Friends
Yeah. Does anyone other than the Dutch have legal weed in Europe? I believe the Germans maybe?
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Breast Friends
That's what we did last year. Are we doing that again, Rob? I don't know. We'll see.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Breast Friends
I mean, that's a fucking advertisement right there.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Breast Friends
But this data guy didn't even kill for crypto.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Breast Friends
Fish. Zachary Barfield. I'm mad at this guy. He's a fisherman. This story's fucking brutal. It's brutal, but fuck this guy. He's a fisherman from Panama City, and he just got 30 days in jail for killing dolphins.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Breast Friends
Yeah, he was fishing, and he would catch a fish, and then the dolphin would eat the fish that he caught. And I don't know how often this really happens. I mean, come on. But they're saying he also poisoned a bunch of dolphins, and he poisoned up to 70 fucking dolphins, this guy. He would stick methanol into bait fish and then throw them at dolphins when he saw them, and he'd get them to eat it.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Breast Friends
And it's a toxic pesticide that acts... that acts against the nervous system of humans, mammals, and other animals. Jesus Christ. Yeah, and so this guy, he's fucking killing up to 70 dolphins, and they gave in Panama City, Florida, which is a bad place. It's bad. You know me. I fucking love Florida. Panama City's garbage. But he... 30 days. That's just crazy.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Breast Friends
Oh, yeah. When the dolphins come in here and they start eating my snapper, I'm like, hold on, there's one right now. Bam!
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Breast Friends
They gave this guy 30 days. That's crazy. Yeah. Dolphins, are you ready for this? You kill a dolphin, you should be in longer than if you kill a dog. That's what I think. I think dolphins should be one of the highest sentences you can get for killing an animal.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Breast Friends
We were talking, Kelly said she was going to go to Wingstop.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Breast Friends
Call 1-877-WHALE-HELP to fucking register your complaints. This is fucked up. Like, I really think this is crazy. Also, it's Florida, buddy. They should take his fucking boat.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Breast Friends
I feel like middle school, I would have been like that. I, there was a couple of rough years for me in middle school where I was very, uh, you know, anti people being alive. And so, uh, you know, and I'm glad I got past that, but weed really helped me explore my empathy.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Breast Friends
Yes, yes. Yeah, you owe a $51,000 fine and 30 days in jail. It's almost worth it for this guy to keep doing it.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Breast Friends
Yeah, and I'm surprised you brought up William Green and not Josh Speed.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Breast Friends
Well, back then they had VAWs, Veterans of American Wars, because it was a civil war. But I don't know if they had it by then. No, they probably didn't. I'm just saying if they did, it was the American War that they would have been celebrating.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Breast Friends
We did a whole episode about it. But they haven't heard it yet.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Breast Friends
It's fine. But, you know, we're going to have a great time at Contact in the Desert. We're also going to be doing a bunch of interviews that are not going to be for, you know, an audience that we're going to release later on in the month.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Breast Friends
I got to say, lower on the ladder, probably better interview because they're not thinking about what they say.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Breast Friends
How are we going to destroy this again? Because you want to set it on fire.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Breast Friends
All right, there is a lot going on here. We've gotten some tips. Thank you for everyone who's reached out saying that Annabelle is missing. Annabelle's been kidnapped.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Breast Friends
Yeah. I've got my little spiders everywhere, and they've got the ears on spiders with ears.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Breast Friends
I think this guy hitting the road with Annabelle, first time like, because honestly, your first time hitting the road, you get a little full of yourself. You get a little excited. You party too much. You party too much. You make some bad choices. I bet man's drunk and he's like, yeah, you can party.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Breast Friends
If Miss Sparrows are out there, I need you to give me a bit more tweets in there.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Breast Friends
And they're like, oh, my God. Oh, Jenny's dead. It's Annabelle.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Breast Friends
She does. I think there's one living inside of her, correct? I think so. Yeah. Brad Dorff. Yeah. Pretty certain. I know. I know. I'm a Robert boy through and through, you know, but Annabelle, I'm down to hang. And if you want to fuck Robert, I'm your end. You want to get down? Like, you want to get some fucking weird-ass doll sex with Robert?
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
there's no place to escape to this is the last on the left side stories that's when the cannibalism started side stories yes all right we're rolling oh yeah i can't we can't even start with singing elvis i You can sing it, but we can't play it. God forbid. I mean, especially Elvis. Oh, no, we'll get shot. Oh, hey, Mr. Zebrowski, you've been served. Austin Butler?
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
No one's had, no, no, no, no. They were trying to make a ghost... For their show? Eddie, that only makes the show more expensive. That's the last thing I want to do. Oh, I mean, what? To kill this man? To Zach Bagans.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
Talk about a ghost adventure. Yes, but you don't think that Zach Bagans is going to be like, oh, sure. Yeah, you can pen me my standard 25K per episode. I doubt that that's, I mean, it's probably way more. He's like, but if you pay me 75, I get you the two.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
Oh, Zach Bacon's with everybody's best friend, Matt Rife. Oh, great. That's what I want to see. Oh, the ghost of talent. That's what they're investigating. All right, so we all feel bad for him, and that is really, really, really sad. And also, one last update is, it seems— Can I ask one more question about the last thing? Oh, please. I'm sorry to interrupt.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
How did you feel about Priscilla making out with Leslie Nielsen in the Naked Gun movies? I'm going to tell you the truth. I got as hard as a candy cane. Something else in there. Somebody else try. I'll tell you what. I'll say the original Elvis Wayne wasn't much of a cook, but Alison Butler, he's a bit of a Dr. Kuckenstein. He enjoys them. Welcome to Side Stories.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
I have no idea. He's in for three consecutive— He's in there for three consecutive life sentences. So it doesn't even matter. He's just there. I think that he thought, because I think some places you can get a conjugal visit. There are certain places you can maybe get one. You can swing one. I don't know if that's happening anymore after what happened this week.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
But death row, they do that quite a bit. Sometimes they do that. They allow you to do it. We talked a little bit about, we don't want to talk about this, but also, you know, congrats on the state of Idaho getting their firing squad back. Oh, yeah, Idaho's going full firing squad. But what I found interesting about that story was the fact that they still have to build the facility for it.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
Yeah, $750,000 to build a room with bulletproof walls, I guess.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
How cool would it be? They should do it with a potato gun. Dude, dude.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
think about this you go into a room you get to choose the guns oh right so what you do is i think that's what it is the first things you walk in you have to rent the gun you have to go to the gun kiosk where you go and you rent the gun for the afternoon and then you go into the other room and then i think there is a cocktail hour and then they have the then he's presented then they do the service the cocktail hour is when they do the lethal injection
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
But they were saying that apparently lethal injection was not, it was no longer considered a viable option because they've been having so many problems with it. The last guy. Yeah, they're having trouble sourcing the drugs. It's just not only just sourcing the drugs, but also apparently they believe that it's more cruel and inhumane.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
Well, yeah, because the drugs were being made by people who don't make actual drugs for humans. They're being made by people who make like Windex and shit. Well, also the main issue was that they were discovering that the people were suffering quite a bit before they died. And also that people that were administering the lethal injections were fucking up quite a bit.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
Like one guy, they said apparently took eight turns to try to find the right vein and all this stuff. And then he's getting, they like paralyze you first. So you're sitting there all paralyzed, but you can still experience everything. And then you're obviously going to be experiencing a great deal of pain.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
And so that's the reason why they're saying, oh, but a firing squad is so much more, like, it's more humane. And you die instantly, quote unquote. But you still got the, you know, you can put the blindfold on. You got to smoke a cigarette. You got the guy there. I don't know if they do the thing where everybody, like, one guy has a bullet. See, I feel like I don't want to smoke a cigarette.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
I want to smoke a turkey. Fuck yeah, dude. Take some time. You shouldn't have fried a turkey. Super dangerous. You don't want to get any water in there. You got to be really careful. I prefer to be shot to death with a super soaker.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
Or why am I going to murder you? Probably because of my ever-traveling health, life insurance, beneficiary status. You never know. You don't know.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
Yeah, and find out when it goes to you. Oh, simultaneous fire. South Carolina execution in South Carolina's recent firing squad. Yeah, three shooters fired live rounds. Okay. Wow. Yeah. Is it true that one person has a blank? No, that's what they're saying is that they got three people with bullets. So you just get shot in the head.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
So there isn't like, but then there are four people and one person has a blank. And so they don't know. No one knows if they were the one who actually killed him. I think that guy just gets, I think he gets to pop a champagne bottle and the other three just shoot the guy and they just go, yeah, we never get to do this. Hell yeah. Like, yeah! He's sitting right there.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
By the way, this is your host, Dr. Kuckenstein. Yes. Henry Zebrowski. I'm sitting with the other, my, actually, Dr. Kuckenstein's monster. Roar! Fuck my wife! Quit begging me, Ted Larson. I can't believe they let the monster get married. They asked him and they rejected because the love couldn't be made. First of all, love can't be born in a lab, even though human meat can. So can bacon.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
What kind of gun would you like to be killed with? AK-47. Hell yeah.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
So they really blow you up there. We don't believe in the death penalty here. No, no, no. But it's interesting to talk about. It is. It might happen to Chad Daybell. Seems like it. Don't like him anyway. But I would fight for you, Chad Daybell, to sit your fat, dumpy, pale ass in jail for the rest of your shit-filled life.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
Because nothing would make me happier than seeing you get beat to death on the pickleball court, just like it almost happened to Scott Peterson. Really? I don't even want to get into that. But Scott Peterson got into a huge fight on a pickleball court in jail. Yeah. Which is also, I can't even imagine. Just pickleball in jail? Pickleball? Can you imagine? He reached jail? Dude.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
How has it gotten that popular? I've never even seen it. Dude, do you think they do MS-13 versus Aryan Nation? Like, do you think that they do full-on, like, Nation of Islam versus... I missed the longest yard. Is there a Jewish jail gang? Oh, yeah, but they're in the white collar. I mean, it's like, God, yeah, yeah. They said that his pickleball style was annoying. Interesting.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
Yeah. No, no, it happens. I feel like conjugal visits might be on their way out. I think that they are heavily monitored, and they are very rare. It used to be, especially in the California penal system, they viewed it as essential to a death row inmate's stay. Yeah.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
And so it was viewed as... They used to get 48-hour to 72-hour stay-ins where someone would come in and stay because California used to actually not...
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
believe in the concept of like the most extreme prison natures even though we had Alcatraz San Quentin we had all the bad ones but it's still like you know LA we kind of cared for a little bit almost so we got some real oh one last update I know you guys have been waiting we had a lot of updates today but one last update I know you guys have been waiting on how this news is going to turn out
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
They got the earrings back. Oh! So the man that ate... So they went through and he's alive? Yep. And he shit him out? $770,000 pair of earrings from Tiffany's. He swallowed them after fooling them. He told them he was a member of a basketball team. He got in there. He ran away with the earrings and swallowed them. This man has been... handcuffed to a gurney in a hospital for two weeks.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
This is completely real. And they have been, apparently what I learned, I got a great email from a nurse that says, essentially, if it gets past your esophagus, It's going to come out of you. Oh. So if it gets past your, that's the real bad part is your throat and your esophagus. But if it can get to your stomach, it can largely come out of you. Wow. So what they basically.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
It gets surrounded by shit probably. Essentially. Yeah. And so they have to. So they apparently when we heard about this, it had already passed through his esophagus and it has been sitting in his stomach. waiting for it to come through his intestines, and it just did. Poo Poo Monday. They all knew that Poo Poo Monday was coming, and they got him, and they sat with a bucket.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
It's amazing it took so long. Yeah. I mean, it's thick.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
Good for them getting it back, but we really need to know how much are the earrings now? They, according to their sources, they've been cleaned and put back into circulation. Oh, so they're not even going to let people know? So if you shop at Tiffany's, you might be buying poo-poo earrings without you even knowing it. And I think what the key is here is hold these people's feet to the fire. Yeah.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
If you go into Tiffany's to get anything. How do I know? How do I know this isn't covered in shit? Exactly. That's your new way to get a discount at Tiffany's. Yeah, just start screaming it right when you walk in the door. How do I know this stuff isn't covered in shit? I want the shitty earrings. I want the ones with shit on them. Yeah, I want to see. I thought one almost killed a thief.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
I want the ones that tried to kill a thief. You know, at Best Buy, you can make an offer on a floor model. You can. You know? And honestly, I will say it. A lot of the managers really even be appreciated being called a floor model. That's why it's really important. Don't lowball him, though, because you come for the manager you best not miss. How much for you? I suck for free.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
We learned a lot about this right before the show. We talked about this before. Bride of Frankenstein. She's not even in the movie. Because she knows he's gay. Oh. Frankenstein's monster is canonically gay. Is that true? Yes, I'm saying it right here. Frankenstein's monster is canonically gay. Oh, Frankenstein. Mr. Heinrich Frankenstein is ready to fuck, my friend. He is ready out there.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
I suck and I fuck you, huh? I suck and fuck. You be wife, huh? Actually, sir, no thanks.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
All right, Tiffany's. I need a little flirt. I need a little flirt. You've got shitty earrings, Tiffany's. Yeah, you do. We all know it. All right, now we have to get to the main stories.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
Melania is a... Like a Tiffany's bodyguard or something? Well, she's a Russian and Mossad spy. Oh, okay. That probably has her vagina... I believe her vagina is sewn shut. Okay. So I don't think she has sex with anyone. Okay, good. Tiffany Trump is who you're thinking. No, okay.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
Yeah, sure. I mean, she's undeniably a beautiful, evil woman. All right. We got some good ones here. All right. So which one are we starting with? Well, we have a Fritzl-ish situation. Now, it's a little bit Fritzl. You know, ladies don't do enough crime. It's nice to see someone do such a specifically male crime.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
Well, we had a, you know, we started the show with a lady crime. We did. We did. But this is some real ass. I want to say this lady is the fucking real ass, bro. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Really cool woman. This story is horrific. Horrifying. This story is horrifying.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
This is one of those stories that was just absolutely plastered all over my life when it came out. Because this is a, we do have, I'd say, a mild fascination with this style of horrific crime. This is Kimberly Sutherland. I mean, it's the whole point of the show. It is, yep.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
yep it's everything i live for uh kimberly sullivan uh 56 years fun uh she looks like an evil clown porcelain doll she uh it seems i don't know about a porcelain doll she just is looking just she is frightening she looks like a mannequin in a fire um now it seems that she has kept her she goes holding her stepson captive for over 20 years.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
Now, the way we know about this is that the son that was kept captive, who was 20-plus years old, he... set fire to the house to try and get rescued. So now we know this. So the way the story starts is that Kimberly Sullivan called the police. If you watch Law and Crime, it's got a good breakdown on it. And she calls the police saying, she goes, 911, there's a fire in my house.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
Help me, my stepson's stuck inside. They come. She's outside of the house.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
completely made up it's really like a wild scene she's got like a fancy robe on and she's got a full face of makeup and she's holding a dog well he's holding a very fancy dog and she's like they're like is anybody else in the house she's like my stepson my stepson's in there you see her get carried away right you then see so accurate You saw the slightest sliver of what the sun looked like.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
So the reason why this is so fucked up is that when the young man comes out, you know, maybe not, I guess not much younger than us, but he is, he was five foot nine. He is five, 20 years younger than us. Well, he's like over 20. He's over 20. Okay, okay. He is 5'9", 68 pounds. Terrifying. And when you see him, there's a little tiny shot of him being pushed into an ambulance.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
And he's frightening looking. He's apparently tortured. 68 pounds is small for anybody. Yes. He was bound. His teeth were rotting out of his mouth. He said he couldn't eat without his teeth breaking and falling out. He said that he had gotten to the point where he was eating whatever he could find. Kimberly Sutherland had other two healthy daughters. Now, this was her stepson.
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So there's some talk about whether or not this had to do with the father, his biological father, that lived with them up to about a year before her. And the father ditched the kid? No, father's dead. Father died. All of this was happening while the father lived at the house. Now, Kimberly Sullivan is now countering her son's claims. Her son is basically like, they tortured me, starved me, beat me.
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According to Google AI, of course, there's no explicit statement about Frankenstein's monster sexual orientation in Mary Shelley's novel, but if you see the scene with him and the blind man, the little bit of affection and sexual tension, I would even say... is that it's seen as rife with sexual tension. Now, is it Frankenstein, Frankenstein, or Frankenstain? Is it the Frankenstain Bears?
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Subjugated me to all forms of psychological torments. The fact that I was told that I could not leave. They physically bound me to a bed. They locked a room. He had to defecate into buckets and to diapers, diapers that he wore. He also he said that the only way he was allowed to know what was going on was that he could listen to the local. I believe it was a local hockey team. On the radio?
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So that's the only way he knew what year it was? No, there's a lot of people, because Kimberly Sutherland... So he was forced to listen to hockey?
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Goal! Talk about fucking torture. So bad. But Kimberly Sullivan is... I do believe that it's going to come out as all real, but she is already countering. He's 68 pounds. How could it not be real? This woman is saying...
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She also posted the $300,000 bail. So she's filthy rich? Well, yes, but she said to the police... That we didn't have money to feed him. We didn't have anything. And he was like, that was all horseshit. She then also basically is intimating that this is coming either from the dead husband that died a year ago or that he was such a dangerous person. Her bound son. Yeah. That he had to be shut up.
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He had to be. Well, then you get the cops involved if they're that dangerous. But this is what she's saying is that no one would take my car seriously. Because there was a welfare check. I think it was in 2012. There was a welfare check. That's a long time ago. Yeah. And the cops were like, it's fine. Yeah. But that's 12 years ago now. But that was when he was pulled out of school forever.
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13 years ago. 13 years ago. That's when he was. Even then he was in school. Yeah. But he kept coming to school, stealing other people's food, filthy, reeking. Trying to survive. Yes. Because anytime you hear that, remember that is that every single time you if you ever hear a kid or anybody in these scenarios talk about stealing food, it's because they're not eating.
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And Kimberly Sullivan, they see this. I've seen so much of this. I feel like. No one should ever get in trouble for stealing food. No. And same thing with me. I actually really do believe that. That's like my one... Because, you know, I love my body cam footage. That's the stuff that really bums me out. That's the stuff I really can't stand is the... Anything involving food shoplifting. Yeah.
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It's food. You have to just give it to them. Just fucking somebody buy it for them. All right? Obviously, you're not doing this because it's fun. Sometimes I are, and that's different. But you're going to be a crazy person. What's the weight limit on food shoplifting? Two... I'd say weight limit, straight up, 225. I was going to say, I said 230. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
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Because they have the scales in front. Yeah. I've been giant and starving. Sure. And I have stolen food at 250. As I have. I did as well.
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Hey, it's me. It's me, Sergeant Austin Butler. Hey.
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Yeah, they did. Yeah. I just had to ask for it and give them $5,000. Yeah, I'm a police officer. I'm going to have to arrest you for food rape. You have a suspicious mind. Yeah, yeah, I do. Yeah, I do. That's how I know. That's how I know the criminal nature. So this woman is... I think that she's going to be... I think that we're obviously... More information is going to come out about this.
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We are going to know... Because... Why didn't he leave? Because he was tied to the bed. Yes. And also, why didn't he? Because she was starving him.
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Don't do Mandela Effect with me. You yelled at the Mandela Effect man. Do you remember? I do remember. It was fun. Wait, what does it say? What is the official pronunciation? Frankenstein. Frankenstein. Oh, yeah, see? It's Frankenstein. Frankenstein. Frankenstein, I think it was just a Mel Brooks bit. It's a Mel Brooks thing. I'm pretty certain. So Eddie's back.
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I think that's going to come out. If you try to run at 68 pounds and 5'9", your fucking bones are going to crumple. And the only thing that really even convinces me, which is why I like watching the body cam footage, is really the stuff that convinces me is you can barely see the sun.
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get pulled into the ambulance, but you see the cop's face as he turns away from the ambulance going, what the fuck? Like, you just see this, like, Jesus Christ, because it was a full-grown man that was built like a ventriloquist dummy. And so it's like not good. So she's like, we're going to say, but she's quite the looker, huh? No. Look at her. Look at them.
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Look, she got her full face of makeup on. What is going on with you? Look at her. No, I'm not saying she's attractive. I'm just saying she really like, she was really ready for her spotlight. No. And she's got a very expensive lawyer. She looks like she's been taxidermied. It's that very intense blue eyeliner. Yeah. That is the most haunting. And her skull-like cheekbones.
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My mother would make a better funeral. Hey, those are experts. Those are experts doing that. That's why they look good at it. All right, that's one story. All right. Here's another story. The biggest story. Dude. I can't believe we didn't start with this. It's because it all happened while we were gone. Yeah. The movie, The Thing, is currently happening.
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Yes, it's in Antarctica. It's scary because there's no aliens. Well, we don't know. Yeah, we do. So there is a group of South African scientists. Literally, the day the astronauts get back, this happens. Dude, these guys are fucked. So these guys are in, apparently, they're in a part of Antarctica. They are on some, I forget what exactly it is they're doing. They're on a cliff face.
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And they are in a part of Antarctica that is about to enter into their, I guess, the overwinter season. Yeah, because their winter is our summer. Yes, and that is extremely, obviously, intense.
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Yes, and I think at that level, it's like planes can't even fly.
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So they are unreachable for 10 months. during this time period. Now, this is at the Sané 4 Antarctic Base. It's cut off because of the winter weather. They got an email sent to the South African government saying, one of our team members has gone insane. And so they are stuck out there and they're starting to say that this one of the scientists, they have a name too, got into the leader's face.
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There was a physical altercation. This person is getting their behavior, according to them, is becoming increasingly egregious. Yeah. People are starting to say that he is threatening sexual assault, physical assault. Oh, he's threatening. I thought he did it. I don't know. This is one of those where it seems to be it's getting really bad there.
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Do we know if the person they're accusing is a man or a woman?
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Interesting. No idea. I think that it's, I'm going to unfortunately say. I'm going to guess it's a man. I'm going to guess it's a man. Because it's 99% usually a man, even though we've covered two ladies' stories today.
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He just did his highly invasive first leg of his highly invasive comedy tour. That's the name of it. Invasive species. Not highly invasive. His tour and his comedy is highly invasive. Yes, we check your panties as you walk in the door. But you do have to fill out a questionnaire beforehand. You do have to say yes to it beforehand. But that's just because the venues are on top. That's right.
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We did. Yeah, but no, this story is obviously developing. We looked up for any form of updates, and it is, we are not there yet. Yeah, the closest place that they can go to is 186 miles away.
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No. And then South Africa's environment minister, Dion George, he said he's going to personally speak to the team members. He's going to figure it out for himself. Oh, thanks. Thanks. Because we all know the government in South Africa is right on the money. You know what fixes stuff, Eddie? You know what always fixes stuff? A Zoom. Yeah. That's it. That's all you need. Boom.
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like as he's going there and then you see that like he pulls up the zoom and and the guy sitting there with like the two like he's pulled out his own eyeballs and it's got like gauze wrapped around it and he's like all i see is pain all we know is hell and he's gonna be like so uh so you guys are gonna get wrapped up by october then or But they're stuck there for almost a year, right?
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I don't know. Is there a gun there? There has to be a gun. There must be. As professional explorer Alan Chambers explains the harsh reality...
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And little things become big things. Like my little penis. It's so big. It's so strong. So big. And so apparently we just don't know. Wow. South African government, they also oversaw a base on Marion Island where an unstable team member in 2017 also destroyed their room with an axe and attacked a colleague with a frying pan.
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But don't worry. The guys from the South African government are saying they don't think that anyone involved in sending I-4 emails has dangerous intentions. But in the event that we need to do an urgent intervention, he says, we can send people from the Norwegian and Germany base. They might send persons. And they're 200 miles away.
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If everyone's dying over there, why would they put their lives in risk? It seems like because in the end, it's one for all for one and all for one for all.
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That's right. There's no police force to come and check on it.
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It's a continent. We're penguins of the police. Yeah, exactly. Yeah, there ain't nothing out there, buddy. Yeah, there's nothing. And it's running kind of like maritime law-ish kind of thing. No, it's... I think that they will be held to the same laws... Of the state by which they live.
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But we have, before we get into talking about your adventures. I was nice also in, you know, Herney was wonderful.
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You know who's not going to appreciate that? The Kraken. The Kraken. Because, as a matter of fact, he's law there. Yeah. I mean, if anything lives there, it's the Kraken. It has to be the Kraken. That's the only thing that would be there. So even he's going to be like, white people crazy. That's like the first thing he says. These white people crazy. Trying to come up here, man.
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This is Squid's house. You want to come to a squid's house? Whatever you want. All right, so that's the story that's going to be developing. I can't believe, again, it happened while we were coming. We're not going to know what happened for months, probably. Nope. And I'm not saying that I want this to happen, but for the sake of our show.
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It would be really cool when they get there if they were all dead. But I think that's not fun. It's not good. I don't want that to be so. Even though you just said that. No, I want it to be a boring result. I want them all to be. Do we know what they're even doing up there? I think that they're trying to see if you can yo-yo on the other side of the planet. Does yo-yo go up or down?
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Day one, yoga continues to go down. Day two, despite intervention, yo-yo goes down. Day three, Dr. Malenka's going to kill me in my sleep. Yo-yo went down. So fucking I don't know. Oh, who was it? Oh, that was a bit. We'll get back into this next week when hopefully we have maybe more information.
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Oh, it was great in Huntsville. Herney Von Braun was so happy to be brought out on stage. He's still working on that tight 25. Herney Von Braun has some choice things to say about the town of Huntsville. And we here at LPN apologize. for everything that he said to you to your faces about the town that you lived in. But we had a great time, and that was just a blast. But we have so many updates.
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Well, it sounds like they attacked the leader. And I just wonder if they do the same thing that we do on a flight. You know, like the flight attendants are trained to tape you to the chair. Yeah. So I wonder if they do something like that. I've seen a flight attendant hold somebody down for the duration of a flight.
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I couldn't believe how strong they were. That's intense. Flight attendants get like that mom strength early. Yeah. They get gripper strength.
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Buses, they try... I feel like on a bus, it's harder to get on soused. I think only because on a bus, people do get fucking beheaded. Yeah. And it's a bit difficult. Whoa, there's a bunch of these. All right, so this is... Oh, so good work, Rob.
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So Sanai's Four's reason for existence is to provide a permanent year-round base for scientists undertaking research projects under the auspice... Well, they're still not saying what it is. Oh, it's just about oceanography, biology, and yo-yo sciences. Yeah. Oh, wow, I didn't know that. Well, great. At least I was correct.
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But we hope that they come home safe, no matter how good it is for the show. So we are going to reach out to them.
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All right, what do we got? What's next? Man killed his stepdad with atomic wedgie. Well, the only reason why- Gets 30 years in prison. This is the dumb story of the week. The only reason why we even brought this up is because a lot of people- Potawatomi. Potawatomi. A lot of people sent this in, and what a silly title, right? Yeah. Marine veteran kills his stepfather with an atomic wedgie.
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We love it. Yeah. Everybody likes to see it. And that is the headline in military.com. Yes. So a guy named Bradley Davis, he got into an altercation. So they all talk about this. His father was a 58, his stepfather, 58-year-old Denver Lee St. Clair. And they said, which I also think it's, I like how they put this.
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He said their altercation ended with Davis pulling his stepfather's underwear up over the man's head, a combative known as the atomic wedgie. Unfortunately, the move would kill Sinclair. And so it seems like he said to all of this stuff, the guy came forward. He was like, I was just messing with him. Yeah. He was like, I was messing with him. I thought it was like funny.
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And I had no idea that the underwear would choke him. That's what he said. The underwear went over his face, underneath his face and under his chin and choked him to death. And they said they were talking. St. Clair began insulting Davis's mother. He called the stepfather a bully. They had a bit of a fight back and forth. And then he said that he pulled the underwear over his head.
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They took a picture. They thought it was going to be funny. And then they had all the stuff. And then if they really looked at it, you actually could see that he was beaten to death. Yeah. The father was beaten to death. And the atomic wedgie seemed to be the coup de grace that finally did end his life, but it was way more of a finish him. Yeah. It was a fatality. He claimed self-defense.
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We have so much bullshit to get to. So let's just jump right in. Number one. Our object on the road series, right? So we've covered on Side Stories of all the types of crimes that go unlooked at by the police in this country. We here at Side Stories have our fingers inside of the pulse. Of this one style of crime, objects in the road. Yes.
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But I don't think you can kill somebody with an atomic wedgie and claim self-defense. I think that that can only be done in sophomore year of high school. Yeah. I don't know if it can be done as an adult. Because, again, the atomic wedgies just get more serious. And also, that's probably one of the worst parts about atomic wedgies is the mutually assured destruction.
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He ended up pleading guilty to first-degree manslaughter.
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Yeah, so he's going to jail. But again, people were joking about the atomic wedgie part of it, but mostly it was about him beating a man to death. It really was. But I've never done, I've never really been wedgied. You've never been wedgied? No. Well, we'll fix that. Leave my balls alone. No, it won't be me. It'll probably happen at the meet and greet.
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But we all become better people over time. Yeah, of course. You have to be. Because if not, you just become worse and worse and worse and worse and worse and worse and worse.
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You know, I mean, I wouldn't... Was he a Marine? He was a Marine.
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You don't normally say that a Marine's mother's a whore. Yeah. Because... It will. Sometimes it leads to a bad result. Yeah. People get really upset. I think that this is more of a cautionary tale to remind all of us how fragile this life is. And that if you get into a physical fight, you could fucking kill somebody.
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That's what he did. Is that essentially... No, it was bad. He murdered the man and gave himself a wedgie.
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I think that they just tried to make it look like it could have been a silly thing that went out of control. Yeah. But it wasn't. Taking the pictures while he dies, that's really probably the seal of the deal. Yeah, everyone was pretty upset with that.
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Yeah, but hey, don't say anything about his mother. No. Right? They'll know that in jail, won't they? Don't insult his mother because this man is going to go full court press and he's going to kill you with your underwear.
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That's what you can still get in jail. Yo, underwear. You can still, oh, yeah. You still get atomic wedgie to death? I think that there is a character that I believe that Marcus is going to play in his stream mandate tonight. Oh, okay. That is one of the most vile men I've seen in a minute. And what he is is this guy that used to serve time in maximum security jail.
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And for those of you that don't see the scene, won't see the stream, you should, though, because these are going to be cut out. As this man talks about the first time I got a piece of that booty in jail.
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So they just don't. Oh, these guys don't meet. Because that guy loves underwear and the other guy loves butt. Well, I think, doesn't the guy love butt? Isn't he free? I don't know, but it sounds like the way he talks about jail, he wants to go back. He is very, very excited. Got wet. Just looking at it. Oh, hey there. Oh, you're talking disgusting, right? Now listen, hey, listen.
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And for those of you who don't, maybe you remember, but I believe that this was in southern. This was in Nebraska. What happened, a rash of objects that were left in the road, one the size of a child's bike, one was a flat screen television. I think one was a child's bike. Pretty certain.
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I think two men is fine for two men to be together, okay? You just have to remember that everybody's consensual, okay? This is me, sexual health officer, Austin Butler.
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You're right. Really quick. All right. So before we get to that, I don't have many letters that I even want to talk about necessarily, but I did have some extra stuff here. Like we had a whole section about OnlyFans models that have really run into quite a bit of trouble. This stuff is very interesting. It all kind of happened over the weekend. OnlyFans is popping off lately.
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It's just been, obviously, I think that newspapers like to report upon it. I also think that it always serves... Think about from the Black Dahlia days. The idea that these people making these choices have horrible things happen to them. And so the newspaper loves... It's supposed to be the safest way. You do it at home by yourself. But it's just... It's humankind.
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It is unpredictable at best and not nice at most. Yeah. Now, this first one was this story is about Michaela Brashe Rylersdom. She's being charged with murder if she was paid $11,000 by a 55-year-old man, Michael Dale, for a BDSM asphyxiation scene. Now, she went in the room. Her and her husband run this OnlyFans site together. She's done this a couple of times.
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The man paid her up for $11,000, quite a significant amount of money. He said he wants to do this extreme BDSM scenario where he is fully wrapped in duct tape and saran wrap. And then he has shoes glued to the outside of the saran wrap to his feet. And then she would manipulate his body sexually. What's the point of the shoes? This again? Fashion. Yeah. It's just about feeling good, feeling sexy.
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This is what this guy wants. Are they J's? No, they're heels. They're high heels. Oh, okay. Absolutely. So he went through this process. Apparently, it went, quote unquote, as planned for about eight minutes. And then the man struggled, would seem to be with pleasure. Then with frightening times.
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We're going to talk about this. So then when she noticed he stopped moving, she was like, oh, no. The man was dead. Now, I will say, if you're agreeing to do these BDSM things, and I'm not even blaming... Like, the dude is what this guy wanted. He asked for a version of this. He asked for... The not permanent version. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And then this lady went ahead to try to do it.
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People would be, they would swerve out of the way in the middle of the night only to be confronted by a young man that had been sitting, watching, and waiting, asking to see if they needed help or a ride somewhere.
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Now, I feel like this is where we might just need one little caveat here that I just want to say as a group.
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Oh, sure. But she's getting nominated, I believe it's for manslaughter. Nominated for manslaughter. Nominated for manslaughter of the year. Sorry, it's award season. This is the only mans murder of the year. But the poke holes in it. If you ever are doubting... At least in the nostril area. Just poke holes in it. And no matter what that guy says... It'll still be hard to breathe.
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He's going to be like... I think what's important, though, is for you, as the professional in the room, to be like... No. You horny little fuck face? No. Because you're already dominant. Yeah. I'm poking holes in here. Because you're not going to like not being able, like, or you got to really keep an eagle eye on there. Or you got to keep an eagle eye.
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I'm blaming the woman only because her ignorance of the situation. It was her first time doing it. Yes. And that is a very, that's a big buildup. This is not just getting spanked. This is not just getting whipped. It's not even just stepping on balls. No, it is an ornate scenario. Everyone knows plastic over the face equals death. Yes, unless you're doing it for fun as a kid.
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Because that's what everybody likes. You never did that?
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Yeah. I love you, Enzo, but I mean, you shouldn't be listening to podcasts.
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I'm just saying, if you want to have fun and you're responsible, it's how you can do it. We used to choke each other. That's different. That's different. But this... But this lady was in a lot of problems, and then there was another lady that, like, this is all sad, but yeah, when in doubt, poke a hole in it, except for a condom. Always keep those in tire. Yeah. But another lady was found.
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You want to hang out in my car? You okay? Hang out in my car. And guess what, man? They found him. We thought that for a while, because you remember that he called the newspaper. He called, I believe it was First Alert 6 that was covering this, Bennington, outside of Bennington, Nebraska. And he said, please stop covering this in a super awkward way.
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I don't think she chose to kill this man. Well, I think that that's... She was already paid. What's the motive? Second degree murder is, I believe, is basically manslaughter, which is what this is. Okay. She has murdered him by ignorance. Yes. She has murdered him by ignorance. Unfortunately... She damned herself when she put the tape and stuff over his nose and mouth.
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No matter what it was he was asking for, it sadly was in her purview to say no. If you help someone with assisted suicide, what is that? Murder. That's second degree murder? Yes. Still. Okay. Yeah. Depending on, that can go up to first degree murder.
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It can go, I believe. But that is one of those, yeah, it makes total sense that she was charged with second-degree murder because, yes, it's the word. It's just, but also remember that that's just the name of the crime versus the, like, what it is. So it's just like, that's homicide. Essentially, you'd just say that's, from the police, that's homicide. In the judicial system, they call it murder.
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But... I don't know, murder? It's what it is. He died. And she had eight minutes to rip it off of his face. The same thing with the Sarah Boone case with Suitcase, the man and the boyfriend in the suitcase. You're right, you're right. Where the whole thing hinged on...
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That's a little more sinister to me. The only thing that... But we don't know what would have happened if she didn't film herself. Because she told the police that she did not understand what level of distress he was under. and that she was just out of her own ignorance. That's why she should have taken the plea in the first place.
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That's why they were begging her to take the plea, because she would have gotten 13 years for manslaughter by copping to it. She decided to go all the way. Technically, that is what damned her, but it was also her filming the video. If it was just her story, it might have been extremely difficult to prove how well she knew. I wonder what, because this incident happened on OnlyFans.
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She was filming it. She filmed it. There is video of it. Yeah. What were the people like watching it say? I think that it was for him. Oh, okay. Okay. It wasn't like a live stream. No, I believe that she was filming. 11 grand, you get your own video. Yes. Customs. You get your custom video. Okay. All right. I believe that is for him. Okay.
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And I imagine the 11K is also for the risk that you're incurring. Yeah. Because it's really intense. Absolutely. Not as intense as a Dubai porta potty. But way more intense than that. Oh, Rob doesn't know what that is either. Am I the only one who brought this? Am I the only one who knows what this is? Me and Ian?
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Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
So there was another OnlyFans model that said, by sheer accident, she definitely... was she definitely accidentally fell from the top of a construction site where broke her spine and a bunch of her limbs. And she's now currently in the hospital. But it's pointing to this other concept that is up until this point, like I'm going to say straight up, this is mostly in the world of conspiracy theory.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
Now we can actually see his awkward face, and he is exactly as we thought he was. He would be. His name is Spencer. Rademacher. Now, old Spencer Rademacher, he is here. The only way you could look at it, his face, his mugshot is what you'd call cosmically dumb. He looks like a person that is. Yes, he is a bit simple, but also life is unfolding at such a speed that it's coming at him.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
It's just been around for a very long time. There used to be a term called yachting. That was a term that was called, which is... But yachting wasn't murder-based. Well, I feel like this is kind of where the stories start from. It starts from the concept of sometimes women of a certain persuasion...
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
Depending on their job, whether they are cocktail waitress or like that type of thing, they are invited to be a part of the staff of some giant vacation yacht. Yeah. And then when you go, there is either a full on agreement or an unspoken agreement. Then you are then here as a you're going to be an escort there. and you were available to people on this yacht.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
It's been used as a way to smear celebrities in blind items. It's also been used as a way to smear bad guys that we know. Matt Gaetz was definitely involved in a lot of this kind of yachting scenario. Human trafficking. Human trafficking. We see the same thing with Andrew Tate.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
He was involved with quite a bit of probably with the pipelines that led to this, which is... Finally out of America again, by the way. I mean, fuck him. God, fuck that fucking piece of shit. But I think...
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
That what we're seeing is this – so with the Dubai porter potty is that this is what seems to be an extreme version of sex work, blah, blah, blah, quote, unquote, sex work that is done by powered, moneyed people in Dubai that talk to what seem to be a lot of ladies in Europe – And what they will do is say, OK, come here.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
We're going to have a weekend and you're going to hang out with these princes and you're going to get a certain amount of goods. So you're going to show up. They're going to put you on a shopping spree. You go get all the stuff. There was one woman talking about it's the first time I've ever been in a Hermes shop. It was the first time I ever walked inside of a Gucci store.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
They went and she outfitted me with like 200 grand worth of clothes. They then showed up with 50 grand just cash, U.S. money, handed it to you. And they're like, all right, so we're going to have our party tonight. And then the party involves being utterly degraded. So it's like the whole point is to get you. You get pooped in your mouth and pissed in your mouth and having sex with animals.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
It's called the Dubai port-a-potty. It's called the Dubai port-a-potty. And they do this all night, right? And then you're kind of dropped off. And they beat you and shit, too. All of it. Break your bones.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
But what they do is they kind of say, like, we do it for, you do it, like, four times a year. That's, like, what this lady was saying that this other lady told her that she did. She's like, you almost get used to it. Sometimes, she says, the smell begins to remind you of money. Like, that's, like, one of those things she starts to say, right? Like, you start to, but this is all, we don't know yet.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
I am not putting it past a single fucking person, especially after you see kind of what, Epstein's, just Epstein, which is probably a low-level version of this. Epstein didn't even have the money that these guys had.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
This is closer to... This is Dubai money. This is closer to Diddy, technically. This is much closer to sort of what Diddy was doing in terms of the scale. Because it's... That's what they do in a way that is... Very over the top. It's at a very big scale. And these are rumors everywhere.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
It is a thing that is... There are too many of people like this that we are now seeing that they have to exist. Yeah. So we just don't know exactly how materially true quite a bit of it is. But what we've talked about with JFK, what we've talked about with MKUltra, is that even if 1% is true, That means the entire history of the world is different than you think it is. Yeah.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
So it's like it's one of those where, well, we will. This is going to be one of those things we've got forever. But, you know, obviously we have a human trafficker president and we're that's like, I guess it's one of the big things that we do here now. Um, yeah. Prince Andrew was definitely involved. Peter Nygaard. If you watch that documentary about Peter Nygaard, that was deeply involved.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
And like, you know, when they jump through the time holes and shit like in Star Wars. Yeah. Like everything is moving at a thousand miles an hour to this man. Yeah, it doesn't look like he can't read, but it looks like he chooses not to. I won't read! won't. And so he, this young man, it seems, he's called the try to get people to stop investigating this crime.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
Then you also look over at the Mormons, which we've been covering now for fucking a month and a half. Tim Ballard with, Oh, you are, was a part of it. This is a whole thing that was all human trafficking that was done by the Mormon slice. So it's like every group's got them. You got the fucking Catholics sending in boys into the Vatican, which is still completely real. You got fucking sixth,
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
stupid fucking old papa who's sitting there turning a blind eye because he's blind. Yeah. Is he still alive? No, he's still fucking alive. He's almost better. They sucked the cum out of his lungs. Yes, they contemplated letting him die. I saw some people say, like I got some pushback too about Pope Francis, but just remember if he was going to do something, he'd do it. Yeah, he looks rough.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
They taped his thumb up here. Yeah, he's starting to look like those JD Vance memes. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, he is looking rough.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
Wow, that's saying a lot. But that's a fairly serious story that we ended there with.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
Yeah. Have you ever been to a Willy Wonka? Potty party?
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
Oh, what's a Willy Wonka porter potty? It's made out of chocolate. Oh, yeah. Is it chocolate? The schnozberries taste like schnozberries. Okay, I never had a schnozberry. Oh, yeah, you're about to get one. Yeah, dude, I could see that Timothee Chalamet ding dong getting all covered in shit. Getting an atomic schnozberry. Man, can we fucking bukkake him once?
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
What? Call you by your name. Oh, yeah, but no, that's... I guess that was just one. He made it a filling. He got hammered. No, he's in that new movie with Gwyneth Paltrow where they're supposed to be having sex quite a bit, but you can just... Jackie and I both were talking about how it will just be difficult to hear after all the bones slapping together.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
Yeah, they're so thin, they'll start a fire. It's going to sound like rifling through the remains of Dachau.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
having sex with each other um well this is what a great what a great episode oh yeah yeah no buddy but hey but there was some laughter along the way as normal amen so we did it yeah i don't care what anybody fucking says all right should i talk more about do i should do both this thing on palmeri and demas what's that the idea of the pink foam oh i want to hear this
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
You respect these emails. I can tell. All I do is respect. I wanted to talk about the pink foam that was brought up twice in the last episode. Yeah. I'll try to avoid getting too in the weeds. but it does require a quick physiological lesson. You can think of your cardiovascular system as a basic plumbing system.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
Blood moves through your veins and arteries like water through pipes, and your heart acts as a pump to keep things flowing. The path of blood basically goes from your body to the right side of your heart to your lungs, back to the left side of your heart, and finally out to the body again. The other component you need to know is about the foam is that it's called surfactant.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
It is a liquid extremely similar to dish soap that is produced in small quantities in your lungs. It basically helps to keep friction low as your lungs expand and withdraw, preventing them from sticking together and collapsing.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
It is not uncommon to see pink foam from the airways after someone has died as the blood that was previously pumped to the heart backs up into the lungs and mixes with the surfactant. This can occur because of increased pressure in the lungs from chest compressions during CPR, someone working hard to bring air into the lungs, or the heart failing and backing up.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
Imagine someone took a container of bubbles, added some blood, and kept squeezing and shaking the bottle. This is basically what is happening in someone's chest resulting in pink foam. So does not necessarily mean an embolism. It doesn't necessarily mean it can just be a general after effect of having died. Okay. All right. So nothing to worry about. It's the pulmonary edema.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
Three months. And they said that they had a I guess they had tags on. They were following him. He was on a list of suspects. We're not quite certain what was the piece of evidence that brought him in. It might have been himself. Because again, I don't think Spencer Rademacher is a verbal What's his name? I don't think he's a Kaiser Soze. No, no, no, no. I don't think he's the mastermind.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
Nothing to worry about. Nothing to worry about. They're supposed to look, I guess nurses are supposed to look for pink frothy sputum as a sign of heart failure and pulmonary hypertension.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
Yeah, yeah, they came to one of my shows. I won't say which one. So she makes sure you stayed up?
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
And it's very emotional. I got to sing a P-Funk song. Dude, you guys don't understand. That was the very first place we ever performed comedy together. It was in a former gay bar called Brothers that is now... A gay bar called...
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
Yeah, the memory fight. Yeah, the mind fight. Yeah, they were like, you really did come from here.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
And they are, so that makes for some tough hombres.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
Yeah, that checks out. Because that was one of the, wow, I've never seen so much blow in one place.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
Evan Rossi was amazing the entire tour. He's our old, old buddy, old Murphys member.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
And that's the lesson. Sell lamps. So if he just got into the lamp business, he'd be doing extremely well. I was telling him, man, I'm like, you accidentally found your new thing. You should be selling lamps. Here's your $5. Thank you for doing comedy. But that is great. I was so excited. It was so much fun, man. And I can't wait to join you in our Florida dates.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
You ain't nothing but a pound dog. Speaking of getting shot. Oh, yeah, that's because why? Because I'd be in jail? No, the pound. You know, they kill the dogs. Oh, great. Yeah, we'll start with something else. Immediately to the dog murder. As soon as we start. As soon as we go. Hey, Eddie, hey. It's me, Austin Butler. It's your best friend. Hey, I'm not Elvis. You don't have to stay in character.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
Lots of people come in that that I grew up with. So it's going to be very emotional and weird. It's going to be interesting. We're going to be getting heckled a lot.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
So just be there for that because you're going to want to be a part of that debacle.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
So he is now... No one died. No one died. Yet. Now he's in jail. Now he's in jail and people can die in there. We'll see what happens. He might die in there. Yeah. He does seem strange. But yes, we'll see. We'll see how he turns out. I wonder if he's going to put stuff in the hallway of the jail cells.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
They're literally going to be completely different. And at Garage, we're specifically doing improv. So that's going to be one we are specifically going to be testing our improv skills. So we'll see how it goes. And go check out our Detroit show. We're at the Masonic on April 18th. You're going to want to come out. That is my beautiful wife's birthday. Oh, really? She's going to be there.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
She's going to come? Yeah. Yeah, I think it's because we're going to go see Grandma.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
Our fucking show is on fire. The Ryman was crazy. We're going to have a good one. You guys, come see us. You're going to like it. And if you don't, go fuck yourself.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
Yes, which will be CrimeWaveAtSea.com. Come see us, because that is going to be an interesting time. Yes, to say the least. Contact in the desert. Oh, yeah, contact in the desert. We have a busy fucking year. Dude, I was looking at it.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
We are extremely booked. But hey, booked and busy. Booked and blessed every day. Amen. That's what I do. I get up every day, 3 a.m. I wash my face with sparkling water. I take a shit in the river. By 5.15 a.m., I am over at my Inquisitor's home where I tell him my secrets from the week before. And then by 7 a.m., I'm trailing my wife. By 8 a.m., I got to fucking go right to the do.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
I double for me and... this comedian in Russia, best friends with Vladimir Putin, and I do the translations for him.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
Go to patreon.com slash last podcast and left to give us money to watch us talk. Go to the twitch.tv slash LPN TV and see us live this week. We have Good Pud at 6 p.m. Come and check us out. All right, you fuckers. Bye. Hail Satan.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
If he does that, honestly, if we can get a word to his lawyer, if he does that, that's how you get out of this. You keep pressing. Commit to the bit. If you... If you... obstruct alleyways in the prison, they're going to know this is just what he does.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
He's like a beaver, but a man. Everywhere he goes, he builds a dam. And it's just because he needs to keep busy. He's a beaver, buddy. He's a beaver guy.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
That's all he is. Yeah, and you can tell because of the tail. And his buck teeth and his doe-like empty eyes. Ah, yes. And his education level. Yes. Ah, yes. He has the same college degrees that one can get as a raccoon.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
Got him. And you know who to thank for that? Side stories. Yep. Woo! Did it again. Yeah. Caught another fucking criminal there.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
But then anybody else can travel on those. I don't care what you believe in. Now, that was one update. Another update. We have, I wanted to bring this up the last time, is that with the Ghost Adventures. Oh, yes. Our friend from Ghost Adventures. Your friend. Well, I actually didn't know him very well. Aaron Goodwin, this guy from Ghost Adventures. We now know that his wife planned to whack him.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
Yeah. I believe her name is Victoria Goodwin. Victoria Goodwin. But the reason why I wanted to bring this up is that I missed a fact that wasn't covered when the story first broke. First of all, did you see this super sad post Aaron Goodwin did? No. Posting that he's now divorcing her, obviously.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
It's the happy face emoji with the little hands. Yeah. That he's just saying he's thanking everyone for their love and support. Why are the hands in the emoji?
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
Don't kill me. I've never seen anyone gesture like that. Don't kill me. That's what that is.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
Please don't kill me. And so his wife, who used to be lovely, now we know she's evil, she was talking to- you're right Eddie except those pictures yeah she did look she had a smile in it and it didn't look too crooked well they did technically they did the thing that everyone does which is like I think people always even hit too hard on the Instagram's just a highlight reel it's like yeah
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
Of course it is. Yeah. Yeah. No, I don't want to put my sad shit on Instagram. No, you want to see me struggle? I saved that for Facebook. Exactly. That's where it's for. That's where emotional problems are. Wow. She's still on there. Yeah. Wow. The wife's still on there. What was the last thing that she just said here? Lions don't concern itself with the opinion of sheep.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
This was a long time ago. Yes. But that is the way.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
That's 135 weeks ago. But still, if you see this, just know this, fellas. If you're married, and I'm sorry, this is specifically for the fellas. If you're going and you've got a wife or you've got a girlfriend, if she posts any sort of square that just says a lion doesn't concern itself with the opinion of sheep, You're going to get killed. She's coming to fucking kill you. She's just a lady.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
She's not fighting the war. She's not fighting Russia. Frankly, I'm sick of all this anti-sheep rhetoric.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
We have mutton? Yeah, you can rail the shit out of one if you're lost in a field. Apparently they have lovely vaginas for human penises. Yes, they're very valuable.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
All right, now we're in the woods. Now we're like a lost sheep wandering through the bush.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
This isn't about the sheep. This never was about the sheep. I'm sorry you brought sheep into it. Such pretty faces. Yeah, I do.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
You've already been nominated for the Oscar. This is me, friend. This is me. Hey there, Bubba. Hey, listen. I just want to tell you something, Ed Larson. Yeah, what? Is that your name? Yeah, it's my name. Oh, that's congrats. You've been surfed. Serve what? Yes. Oh, you're getting sued for copyright infringement. Copyright infringement? Yeah. Oh, I just got you. You just got butlered.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
You can put lipstick on it. You can kiss them. You can do anything you want to a sheep if you're alone with it. And in the... Horny for sheep. Yeah, in Scotland, or if you're a farmer. Yeah, if you're a farmer. So, Victoria Goodwin was talking to a very specific person.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
She was talking to, and the person that she, these texts came back and forth about planning to kill her husband, were with a young man by the name of Grant Amato. Okay. Now, for those of you that are unfamiliar, Grant Amato is a- Looks like Skeletor's kid. He looks like if Skeletor's kid was a bubble boy. He's allergic to morality. That's what he looks like. Gran Amato is such a piece of shit.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
So just a real quick paraphrasing of his crimes. He was already in jail. He's a famous criminal. He killed most of his family except for his brother. I believe it was mom, his dad, and his other brother or his sister. He murdered them because he gave the entire family's...
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
life savings he put the family in millions of dollars of debt just sending money to an only fans lady oh that if you have this reaction to there's like a whole thing to if you watch it you should watch the explore with us i think it's on grand tomato yeah it's a great it's a fucked up sad story but this is a guy that this is the last i'll tell you what victoria goodwin this is the last guy you should have been hitting up for advice
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
Yeah, he got caught. He got caught. It's interesting when people go after criminals in prison for advice on being a criminal, they already got caught. I think that she knows that he's enough of a weak-willed human being that maybe that he could figure out something for her.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
I don't know what she thought, but she started talking to this guy, but he gave a bunch of money to this OnlyFans model, and if you look at... There's a call in this story in EWU that if you see Grant Amato, it might be on Dreading. There's a whole story of it. The video that people have to see is him talking to the OnlyFans model when he's trying to be like, I have to break up with you.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
My dad says they're cutting it off. And I have to break up with you. And I know I love you. I love you so much. And this woman does the best... oh, oh no, sorry puppy. Like she could, she's one of five guys that have killed their families just sending her money. She's just like looking out a window going, oh no, that sounds bad. Oh no, beware of this tribe. Yeah, exactly. Oh, no.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
Thank you for everything. Yeah. He's just like, I didn't stop the car. I didn't hang up the call. And so that's just what I wanted to add. He the big update really is the fact that Aaron Goodwin is divorcing her. So he's already said, all right, enough's enough. He still says that he was blindsided. He just loved his wife. And that is really, really sad.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
Yeah, well, butler, you should have been fatter when you died in that movie. No, they wouldn't let me. I had to go into it. I was doing a movie called Skinniest Man Alive right after that film. But at the same time, I was like, can I talk like Elvis, though? And they said, oh, I don't think you can do anything else. I was sitting there. I was like, oh, you're right, Bubba.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
And that's what you really got to be careful for when you are, and I mean this, guys, and a lot of you out there. I saw it in Huntsville. I see it in Atlanta every time I go. A lot of us, and I'm proud of you boys, are punching outside of your weight. Yeah. You know, a lot of you guys got hotter people than you deserve. And you just have to remember that sometimes. That they'll kill you.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
Yeah, they will. And that they're not innocent just because they're cuter than you. And that you need to check in.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
That's the key. Yes. All right? And also, you know what you do? What? You know what I've been doing now? I'm going to try this when I get my health insurance. Push-ups? No. Sit-ups? No, no, no. Jumping jacks? Nope. No. Change the beneficiary every month. Oh, that's nice. Go in, change it to somebody random. Wow. Somebody famous. Somebody who's got too much money.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
Just every once in a while, and then just be like, I don't know if you're ready to cash out this month, because right now, if you knock out old Henry Zebrowski, it looks like a certain... George Knapp receives all of this. So you better be careful, all right? They said they could insure me up to $7,500. Woo! Yeah. So that's all going George Knapp's pocket right now.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
He does. He is. He's Ichabod Lame. Hey, come on. Come on, you fucking piece of shit. Idiots. That's Grant Amato. Aaron Goodwin is not. Aaron Goodwin is. He's a fine man. Yeah, I know. Goodwin's cool. And he doesn't deserve that happening to him. Yes. I wish that his wife didn't try to kill him. Me too. Except at the same time, I hope that it frees him up to some awesome action.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Atomic Wedgie
coochie-coo from some people that feel really bad for him.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Christmas Movie Stories
This is the Last Podcast on the Left. Side stories? That's when the cannibalism started.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Christmas Movie Stories
He offed himself. Did you just ruin the end of Harry Potter?
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Christmas Movie Stories
No. No, they're not getting hurt. No.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Christmas Movie Stories
Yeah, Dirtle, Dirtle, Dirtle. Come on, bitches. Dirtle, Dirtle, Dirtle, bitches.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Christmas Movie Stories
I understand. I'm already here, just let me die.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Christmas Movie Stories
She really wanted us to watch Red One.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Christmas Movie Stories
Is to be forced to do this? Is this like watching television in a common room in a jail?
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Annabelle Rides Again
God, it's like I'm in the room with Kid Cudi.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Annabelle Rides Again
Gene Simmons is probably being like, you have any idea how many people would pay to be my toilet? Four. I met four of them.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Annabelle Rides Again
And he's just like, I could have used some of that money, father. I feel like $12,000 might have helped towards me getting a used car or something, my dearest father.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Annabelle Rides Again
Man, his son is embarrassed. He does not want to be there.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Annabelle Rides Again
I guess you're right, Gene. It's cool to be raped. I never thought about that. Do you guys ever write a song about that, about how it's cool to get raped? Actually, we wrote several of those songs.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Annabelle Rides Again
So Joe Exotic, you know, I could die tomorrow and I could go knowing what true love was really all about. Jorge gave me the most loving and devoted 10 months of my life. I pray God will give me the chance to experience life with him again. I went outside today and it was hard, but truly amazing how many people and gangs came up to me to check to see how I was holding up since he left.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Annabelle Rides Again
You know, they all respected us because we weren't the typical gay people just causing drama and bed hopping.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Annabelle Rides Again
He did the non-toxic aversion of what that lady did to all of the gang members in Haiti, where he died by empanada. And I love Ralphie Manning. He was a full-on appetizer victim.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Annabelle Rides Again
Sidestories, LPOTL at gmail.com. What's the moral code?
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Annabelle Rides Again
Yeah. Right? Yeah, dude. Somewhere in this town. Tonight, there's gonna be a jailbreak.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Annabelle Rides Again
And so, again, it's like they said, if you walked into that jail and you said, the most elite criminals in the world are held here, you would be very frightened. Yeah. Because it's falling apart completely.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Annabelle Rides Again
I have no idea why they're like, Annabelle.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Annabelle Rides Again
But what I realized, the reason why I'm still grieving is that I... We joke on the show all the time about...
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Annabelle Rides Again
Yeah, they said, can you think that you'd be able to make that bond? And he says, I'm just a guy struggling to get by. I ain't going nowhere.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Annabelle Rides Again
story was it like him as a boy it's his it's tales of his childhood it's all about oh little jeffrey epstein and his many businesses even as a kid he somehow flipped a fucking like he obviously was pimping but the main thing was a lemonade stand
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Annabelle Rides Again
And I know that my father and I would laugh at the goblin activity that I've seen. And oh my God, he would love to arrest those goblins as much as any police officer ever could have arrested anyone. And I wish that for him.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Annabelle Rides Again
Yeah. American Italians hated the Nazis at the time. Wow. But now, obviously, they seem to really like them. Time. They were, ah, time.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Annabelle Rides Again
Yeah, that's all pan flutes. Actually, it's making me angry. Yeah, yeah, yeah. The idea of doing that. How sad you'd have to be sitting there at a kiosk in the mall listening to a fake Native American play his electric pan flutes just like this.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Annabelle Rides Again
Again, I just can't say thank you enough to everybody that reached out so nicely to me.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Bad Mormons
Child. Is it just... No, it's okay. Is there chairs? It's a child.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Bad Mormons
420 fucking dark, dude. Fucking blow smoke in his face, man. Yeah, man. The fucking demons are coming for you.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Revenge of the Drones
The president must be safe. I think that is safe. You're him in the off season. The lighthouse has been exploded. Yes, and they're coming for us. They're coming for us, Space Needle.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Revenge of the Drones
I know you're clean, baby. I know you're clean. I just can't bring anything back to my wife. I know I can tell you're clean, baby. By the way you dance. I know you're nice. Oh, nice, tidy woman. Oh, my God, that's your asshole.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Revenge of the Drones
That's why. Just make them come real fast.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Revenge of the Drones
They just start like, they're like, they wouldn't even think, entertain the option that a human was caught in the well. Don't fucking go anywhere near there, man. All right, don't go near that hole, man. That's fucking, you know where that shit is, dude. Ghosts are always trying to yell you into a hole, man. Don't fucking go anywhere near it. You know it's ghosts, dude. All they want is company.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Revenge of the Drones
That's all they want to do. They just want roommates, man.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Revenge of the Drones
oh, my God, that's the most solid ghost I've ever seen.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Revenge of the Drones
Oh, I'll show you. Oh, well, Mr. Fell in a well.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Revenge of the Drones
Welcome to Butt-Fu King. Ah, yes. The home of my grandfathers. Butt-Fu King. The most distant part of Egypt. This is my friend, King Butt. Yes. I was born with two asses. At least that's what I said, because I'm a lady!
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Revenge of the Drones
Excuse me, officer. My beers are getting warm.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Revenge of the Drones
We are just, I'm just, I'm nihilistic. I'm a broad, I am on nobody's team but my own. Yeah.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Say It Ain't So
Preston Nichols, yeah. You sent me that. An incredible character.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Say It Ain't So
The shit's Carlton. That's what you're saying.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Say It Ain't So
Yes, I can't wait. I'm very excited. I can't fucking wait, dog.
Last Podcast On The Left
Sinners: An Interview with Ryan Coogler
Now, obviously, there's some Robert Johnson influence here in this movie. Yeah, big time. And you do your research and all that. And I got to ask a very last podcast question. How connected was Robert Johnson to the devil?
Last Podcast On The Left
Sinners: An Interview with Ryan Coogler
You got Sylvester Stallone nominated for a second Oscar?
Last Podcast On The Left
Sinners: An Interview with Ryan Coogler
You're a cheap date. Yep. That's it. That's all I want to do. I got to ask a question. We go back to Robert Eggers for a second.
Last Podcast On The Left
Sinners: An Interview with Ryan Coogler
Y'all know each other. You got the same agent. Both of you make... vampire movies within a year of each other. Is he like, what the fuck, bro? What the fuck?
Last Podcast On The Left
Sinners: An Interview with Ryan Coogler
They're completely different. They're utterly different. I don't think it could be more, except for they're both period pieces, but they couldn't be more different.
Last Podcast On The Left
Sinners: An Interview with Ryan Coogler
To bring a budget like this to a horror film is like, just like, thank you for like giving it recognition. It's a great year for horror. Between Nosferatu and The Substance and you, like, this is great.
Last Podcast On The Left
Sinners: An Interview with Ryan Coogler
Screamboat. Oh yeah. Have you even seen Screamboat?
Last Podcast On The Left
Sinners: An Interview with Ryan Coogler
Obviously, we're excited about the horror movie and totally X-Files. We love our aliens over here. But I got to say, all of your movies, including Creed, are very like... Music is such a key part of it. It's obviously very important to you. And I love everything you did with music in Sinners. It was really, especially the one scene. That scene. One of the coolest scenes I've ever seen.
Last Podcast On The Left
Sinners: An Interview with Ryan Coogler
yes it was yeah it was a straight up like coolest music video i've ever seen it was very it was very interesting and then but you do something that i miss from movies and for especially with black panther and and wakanda forever is the specialized companion album yeah And that was something that we saw a lot in the 90s, you know, and stuff like that.
Last Podcast On The Left
Sinners: An Interview with Ryan Coogler
And I was recently complaining that it doesn't happen more often. And Sinners needs an album.
Last Podcast On The Left
Sinners: An Interview with Ryan Coogler
Okay, Andre3000, good flute player or not?
Last Podcast On The Left
Sinners: An Interview with Ryan Coogler
Yeah. Also, I need a George Clinton biopic, by the way, if you could, no one's done it. I don't, it just needs to happen at some point.
Last Podcast On The Left
Sinners: An Interview with Ryan Coogler
Oh, my God. He's hilarious, man. He literally just makes fart noises into instruments.
Last Podcast On The Left
Sinners: An Interview with Ryan Coogler
I've been waiting to see that in the cinema forever. And you did it. And I appreciate it. Thank you.
Last Podcast On The Left
Sinners: An Interview with Ryan Coogler
I'd offer you luck, but you don't need it, my man. You keep up everything. You just keep doing what you're doing. Can you offer us luck? He just did. No, good, good, good. Dude, thank you. Mr. Coogler, please. Thank you very much.
Last Podcast On The Left
Sinners: An Interview with Ryan Coogler
April 18th, go see Sinners. Oh, I forgot to ask him where to eat in Oakland. Fuck it. All right, text him. Let's get him back. Call him back.
Last Podcast On The Left
Sinners: An Interview with Ryan Coogler
It's a prestigious interview. He just burped during the blunt. I know. This is the end. I didn't do it while we were talking to him. Well, also, if you're not going to go see Sinners on April 18th, come to our show in Detroit. It's going to be a lot of fun. See it in the morning. See our show at night. And come yell at us about it after the show. That would be great. All right, guys.
Last Podcast On The Left
Sinners: An Interview with Ryan Coogler
Be good to yourselves. And hail Ryan Coogler. Hail Satan.
Last Podcast On The Left
Sinners: An Interview with Ryan Coogler
That's correct. We have information and we're going to release it unless this is a good interview.
Last Podcast On The Left
Sinners: An Interview with Ryan Coogler
Man, what are your favorite horror movies? Yeah. Not just what inspired Sinners, but what inspires you in general, kind of?
Last Podcast On The Left
Sinners: An Interview with Ryan Coogler
Now, you consider that horror over sci-fi?
Last Podcast On The Left
Sinners: An Interview with Ryan Coogler
Raiders of the Lost Ark, whenever it melts.
Last Podcast On The Left
Sinners: An Interview with Ryan Coogler
There's so much footage of it scaring dogs. So that's how scary it is.
Last Podcast On The Left
Sinners: An Interview with Ryan Coogler
It does have a Monsters on Maple Street kind of feel to it.
Last Podcast On The Left
Sinners: An Interview with Ryan Coogler
It takes a smart man to ask questions.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Raccoon with a Meth Pipe
Hey. What? Come here. Hello? The raccoon has her meth pipe. Has what? Oh, my God. Her meth pipe. He's playing with the meth pipe right now. No, don't reach for it. That's evidence now. It's evidence. You don't want him to have that. Well, that's why I'm going to do it. Hey, buddy.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Raccoon with a Meth Pipe
Okay, you're on audience. He'll be here in two minutes. I'm right across from my office. Yeah, this is what she's smoking meth in. Okay. The raccoon play with her meth pipe. All right. He's got another one now.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Raccoon with a Meth Pipe
He's got two meth pipes. Oh, there's no one.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Raccoon with a Meth Pipe
There's no one. All right. All right, enough fun.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Amouranth Home Invasion
Yeah. They just fucking, I'll kill her. You know what I mean?
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Amouranth Home Invasion
That's what they could have done right here.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Amouranth Home Invasion
Like, who does it make, like, wet? I mean, like, as you can see right here, I have Da Vinci's autograph. Like, you wait until I know.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Amouranth Home Invasion
He says, I would advise people to have this procedure because previously I relied daily, daily on the pills to increase my sexual potency.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Amouranth Home Invasion
Thank you very much to those who were with me yesterday at Castellina to give us the support, the friendship, and the love. I think you all are with my heart.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Amouranth Home Invasion
But you can look it up online beforehand. It's out by the windmills. I think you gotta check with a...
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Amouranth Home Invasion
Maybe it's an inside joke with him. I don't know, but it's hilarious.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Amouranth Home Invasion
From the boogie-down streets of Queens to a pile of beans, a new cup of piping hot Polish-Italian java, last podcast on the left, and Spring Hill Jack coffee rising from the rubble with a new brew.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Amouranth Home Invasion
Nothing to do with any moth-based entity. Don't even think about it. This is a Butterfly Dude.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Amouranth Home Invasion
It's a Butterfly Dude Roast. This is the Butterfly Dude's Blue Eye Blend. Entirely delicious, and not just the same beans.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Amouranth Home Invasion
That would have cost a tremendous amount of money.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Amouranth Home Invasion
There's no place to escape to. This is the Lost Podcast. On the left. Side stories?
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Investigation Alien w/ George Knapp
Different planets? Who knows?
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Investigation Alien w/ George Knapp
Yeah. And not just that, the fact that you said that they saw lights in Texas and in New Mexico on the same night.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Investigation Alien w/ George Knapp
What I loved about investigation alien is kind of like my biggest gripe with learning about this stuff. It's always, Oh, I got the best thing you ever saw. You can't see it, you know?
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Investigation Alien w/ George Knapp
Yeah. But that's what I enjoyed about Investigation Alien was you would really grill anyone who showed up to be like, okay, when can I see this? When can I establish proof? Because right now you're telling me a lot of things I want to hear, but you got nothing for me. And I really appreciated your candor with these people because that's how I see it too.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Investigation Alien w/ George Knapp
And so what have we learned from the new congressional hearing that is – That information.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Investigation Alien w/ George Knapp
They look silly. I'm sorry. They made fun of me. They didn't believe, George.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Investigation Alien w/ George Knapp
He's just going. And speaking of being too fat for the rides. That's me.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Investigation Alien w/ George Knapp
They kick me off the Harry Potter ride and go, fuck.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Investigation Alien w/ George Knapp
We got into that last week.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Investigation Alien w/ George Knapp
What better way to hide than to make it look like it's us?
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Investigation Alien w/ George Knapp
I'd like to be a guy who brings you pizza. Love that. Yeah. I would love that for us.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Investigation Alien w/ George Knapp
Now, do you, in all of your files, do you have stuff that you could never show us in your files? And if you do, why?
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Investigation Alien w/ George Knapp
Yeah, you got so many files. Yeah, show us something. Give us a hint.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Investigation Alien w/ George Knapp
Also, I don't want to be morbid, but what's your will look like?
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Investigation Alien w/ George Knapp
Yeah, you thick, bottom-heavy sons of bitches.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Investigation Alien w/ George Knapp
That no one even cares about anymore.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Investigation Alien w/ George Knapp
Well, it worked. It really worked. 43 years in and I'm hooked finally. Yeah, you got him.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Investigation Alien w/ George Knapp
Oh, this has been great, George. Thank you so much. We always got your back here at Last Podcast at 11. Always.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Investigation Alien w/ George Knapp
We'll let you know next time we're in Vegas. Can I come to your house? We're good.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Investigation Alien w/ George Knapp
All right. We'll do that. I love it. I'll see you soon, George. Bye.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Investigation Alien w/ George Knapp
You were going all over the world. It was crazy. I was like, what are they doing? Why do you leave them alone?
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Investigation Alien w/ George Knapp
Yeah, you're down in Brazil, you're in Mexico, you're all over the place. And as someone who is still like dipping their toe into ufology, I don't really know much. I'm very new to it. Henry has been my guide. The show was perfect for me. It really gave me an overview of everything that's going on right now. I'm hooked. I can't wait to learn about more.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Investigation Alien w/ George Knapp
I'm so happy that you're at your house right now because I felt like your house was like a character in the documentary.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Investigation Alien w/ George Knapp
The secrets in the boxes in your house. It is wild. It's a beautiful, beautiful thing. Thank you, George, for sitting down with us.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Investigation Alien w/ George Knapp
And all that information, it's way safer in those boxes than it is on a hard drive or on your computer. So it's a smart move.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Investigation Alien w/ George Knapp
They're not a sponsor, right?
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Investigation Alien w/ George Knapp
Yes, and just before we get started, January 11th, last podcast on the left is going to be at the Coca-Cola Roxy Theater in Atlanta, speaking of Six Flags. Oh, yeah. So come enjoy us. We have been fucking doing this show hard, man. And we are ready to fuck you up. We're doing side stories the next night. Already sold out. Done. So fuck that shit. Sorry. Gotta come to the last podcast on the left.
Last Podcast On The Left
Side Stories: Investigation Alien w/ George Knapp
So was this an attack or like a science experiment on humans?
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
We have two people in the back here. Rob is our producer. We got the gals. Making sure that you don't say anything too horrible. Our goal is to make you say horrible things. We're in a constant battle. So before we get started, I just want to say I love horror movies. Horror movies are probably my favorite genre of movies. I have been terrified to watch Talk To Me, and I haven't watched it.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
I actually love the hometown authenticity. I like that.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
I love that. I think that's universal. But you know they mean it. The actors know what they're saying. You know what I mean? Yeah. Yeah.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
Well, so the kids are using, especially in Talk to Me, they're using it to like, like it's drugs. Yes. That's what's awesome. It's a fun game.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
No, I'm not doing the hand. Get on the damn hand. If anything, I'll fight the people with the hand. No, you have to follow the rules.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
As long as you follow the rules, you can use the hand. No, you can't. Yes, you can.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
This is our whole gig. Don't make us relax. I'll fall immediately asleep. Oh, man. But seriously, though, man, that would talk to me. I'm watching this fucking movie and I'm looking at all these kids and they're going crazy. And I'm just like, stop touching the fucking hand. Just stop it with the hand. You guys are going too crazy.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
And it's just like it's I felt the same way when I was at a party and like someone kid had stolen like a nitrous tank from a hospital. Yeah. Everyone was doing the balloon. and everyone, I saw like two kids almost die. I felt like I was back in that room when I was watching that movie.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
That's why you're a director. Yeah. You're able to distance from the emotional effect.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
Yeah. That's what we do. It's our jobs. Oh, very much so. So, first of all, if you had anything negative to say about our president, Donald Trump. I'm sorry. I just wanted to just check. I just wanted to check at the very top just in case you're having any issues traveling back and forth.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
See, that's something I did not know about.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
I specifically did not watch this movie because I'm like, this scares the shit out of me. I want nothing to do with this. I watched it last night with my wife, and fuck you. My wife had to sit there and see that.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
Lower. Lower. Kiss him lower.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
Yes, I kissed a dead head once, and it is upsetting. I wish I didn't. Where were you? What were you doing? My mom died. Oh, it's his mother. It's his mother. It's fine. Don't worry. It's been a long time. We can joke about it. The other corpses that he's played with have mostly been extremely warm. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Because he's got them fresh.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
Yeah, yeah, yeah, come on. Alright, come on. Now this is me taking it. Yeah, see?
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
We know how to talk to big directors.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
We're big directors. We're actually quite physically small.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
Were you surprised?
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
When they see us in person, they go, I think we sound quite small. Yeah, but you're wiry fuckers. I ain't trying to fight you. Did you ever get in fight as brothers? Like, did you fight dudes as brothers? Oh, like, together? Yeah, we did. We used to fight people in the neighborhood. Yeah. We were pretty cool. It's just, it's called having a go, right?
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
I was surrounded mostly by girls. Did you fight them? No, we played little games.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
Honestly, it's about being in the right scene. Yes, correct. Or in the right position. Oh, yes. I remember I was in Wolf of Wall Street and one of the scenes.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
Gather round. Gather round. Let me tell you a story. Listen, there's many. I'm almost nine years older than you both. But I always remember because there was a scene where it was one of the plane orgies and the A.D. told everybody, all the ladies on set, that if you're going to be on set today, you might be nude. Right. And so there was ladies next to Leo.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
And he said to one of them, just so you know, you're going to be naked in the scene. So you're going to take off your clothes, blah, blah, blah. And she was like, actually, I have a contract for a previous contract where I'm not supposed to get naked in the scene. He's like, that's totally fine. We're just going to have to move you out because they've been talking about they want. And she was like.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
No, I'll do it. And then she just took off all of her clothes because she knew she'd make it in the movie.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
Yes. I was in all the orgies. Wait, you're in the film? Yeah.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
He's the fat, ugly one. Oh, my gosh. Is that you? Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
I'm so interested. Yeah, I love it. That was the closest I ever got to seeing that. Wait, so you were extras on different... How many films have you been on? I was an actor in that. You're an actor. I used to act a lot. He's been in like six or seven legitimate films. I used to be good. I used to be very castable. Do people get, do you get rusty? People get rusty.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
You know what's funny is that I think that- He got fat. I've got fat again.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
Actually, I got skinny. I got skinny and then I got fat again.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
and what isn't like you lost rose when you got skinny oh yes really very much so oh no i was i will tell you the truth this is a full-on exposure i was it was between me and patrick what's his name swayze yes me and him always were against each other always no it was paul hauser yeah i was for itania and then they asked me if i could gain 100 pounds oh my god and then they said no is that
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
And then this morning, I woke up 7 a.m. bright and early to see Bring Her Back. Perfect breakfast film. I've been trying to tell people, honestly, see the matinee. Like, get in at 3 o'clock in the goddamn afternoon and just experience it sober. I was watching this movie. I had to pause it halfway through. I'm losing my fucking mind, all right? I'm going nuts.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
Yeah, no, I couldn't get it. It was too skinny. I got too skinny, and then I lost all its rolls. 100 pounds? Is that impossible? It's a lot, yeah. No, they wanted me to be fatter. Oh, Henry could gain 100 pounds. Oh, hey, believe me. I just gained five pounds sitting here. I'm a coach. Oh! Yeah, big fat piece of shit. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Hold on, he looks so familiar. Wait, go into his IMDb.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
What have I seen him in? Yeah, I did this. It was in a show called Your Pretty Face is Going to Hell. This is amazing for me.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
Now I'm just talking with them. I want to do a podcast of him. Yeah, yeah. Look at that guy. I do it every week. It's not that great.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
All right, so now let's get back to you. Call my ID, B-Page.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
We know Lloyd Kaufman. If you want to go work for free, he'll gladly take your stuff.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
Damn, the Troma movies are awesome. You know, it's funny because we did get in touch with that crew. Have you found that yet? Have you met... How do I put this? Have you met a hero that's disappointed you? Do you know what's weird?
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
Yeah. That's so awesome.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
Oh, he's cool, man. That new Alien movie was fucking awesome. It was so fucking good. I really enjoyed it. I can't wait to see what else this guy does. Now, when you're in this situation, are you guys as fun as you are now, or are you, like, actually playing it cool?
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
That's the goal, yeah. Here, we're not as elevated.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
Yeah. Do you think so? Yeah. I know so. I'll tell you what, man. You're two for two. We were talking about The Shining earlier. Used to be the scariest movie I ever saw. These two movies have taken it over in one day. The scariest fucking films I've ever seen. You also scarred him. This is the type of shit that scars you. I'm like mad at you and also impressed. Can I ask?
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
You were saying, like, characters appear in and out of your films as you're writing them. I know that, like, you know, obviously there's probably not a lot you could say about you were developing a Street Fighter movie. Was M. Bison ever in Talk to Me?
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
How was he in real life?
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
You know what they say, never meet your heroes. Exactly. Exactly as I wanted him to be.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
I can't deal with this goddamn fucking movie. It's too early in the morning, all right? I got a beautiful dog. I'm like, I love you. Please kiss me, all right? And then so I'm like, all right, I pause it. He's the mouth kisser to the dogs.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
Yeah, thank you. It's you're in America.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
But you know what though?
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
Something like that's going to come back around.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
As far as video games go, you know what no one gives a shit about? Street Fighter 1. Street Fighter 2 is the real game.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
Wait, hold on. No, no.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
Oh, I see what you're saying.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
Don't make Street Fighter 1 because it's bound for failure.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
Are you talking about the interview or what? But truly, I think that you made the utterly correct choice. Because the more you guys are betting on yourself, the more you're making an extremely good movie. I think there's time for you guys to do some IP.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
Yeah, Talk To Me X. Dude, do Talk To Me X in space. Dude, I've written out 40 sequel ideas.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
Yeah, you guys love it. And it's fine. So I go and I go make my breakfast and I start like cutting my strawberries and I got scared of the knife in my hand. Yes. Because of the movie that you made. I was like, I was scared of myself because of what you guys did.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
You will love it. You will actually love it. That is all I want to see. The more, have it show up at fucking like, you know, it should go back in time. You can go forward in time. Michael, keep talking while I get this up. You're going to love this.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
Talk to me, they build it with pyramids. Well, honestly, we're doing this alien festival in a couple weeks. Contact in the desert. Talk to me. Bring that hand to the alien festival. What is being abducted by aliens? What's this alien festival? Contact in the desert. It's a bunch of people who have been abducted and shit.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
Yeah, that was me.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
I was there. You stormed Area 51? Do you have the bullet holes to prove it?
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
Yeah, yeah, you were like, we're not fucking around, it's Area 51.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
Did you Naruto run towards Area 51? I wasn't there.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
Wow. That's a big deal, guys. How come you didn't, by the way? Because, to be honest, I'm a pussy. I don't want to get arrested. You can't be in the desert. You know, honestly, I must be most. I'm sitting in water right now. Same as Sally Hawkins. I literally am sitting within water right now just to sit.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
I hope y'all are going to be pushing for her to get an Oscar for this because it was unbelievable.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
Oh, yes, The Substance. It changed everything. It's all different now. If we let the Oscars infect horror movies, it will never be the same. If horror movies get too big for their britches, it's never going to be the same. It's never going to go back.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
Yeah, humble yourself.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
Yeah. The fact that substance went that far. It's honestly awesome. Body horror. Nosferatu, sinners, now you fuckers. It's crazy what's happening right now. Well, I wouldn't put us in that category. You put those three, put us maybe a few down.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
But no, dude, I mean, bring her back. I'm not just sucking their penises here. It's a forever movie. Yeah, yeah, like, it's a great movie. I put it in close to, like, because right now my truly favorite modern horror film is Hereditary, and it is right on its tails. It's, like, doing the same. It gave me the same feeling, which is literally what Eddie was saying.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
I wanted to shut the movie off and run away. Oh, my God. That's awesome. I literally, at one point today, I stood up in the middle of my living room, woke up my wife, who was still asleep, and I'm like, it's just too much.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
He doesn't even want to. If you've seen the movie, you know what that sound is.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
Did I tell you?
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
See, that's a real director though. You stood and you're like, I'm not getting it enough.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
Do you think you'll stay doing genre forever?
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
That's also going to do extremely well because I think that people are really interested in that and wanting to see because it's a whole world. Well, I just don't know because that's real blood.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
I'm going to kill it. She had a 20 pound dog. Yeah, yeah. She's 13. You don't have to wait long. We actually already got the funeral planned. Can I ask, can I ask, how do you guys, because you guys made like stunt vids, right? Like you guys were doing, how does it get, like, was it just a natural progression of filmmaking from there?
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
People love it. When people get into death wrestling, like honestly, like, is it just, is it real? Not to, I'm not saying that they're not quote unquote real wrestlers, but is it like trained wrestlers also doing it as well? Yeah. Or is it just psychopaths?
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
They do moves, they train.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
Yeah, that's how, that's what I bring to my eating game. It's a passion.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
So are you a guy... Are you a true believer?
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
Oh, my God. If you're ever in town for this, it's at the end of May each year. It's called Contact in the Desert. Damn, it's the end of May. Damn it, I leave tomorrow. But it's the number... If you're ever here... I'm certain that... I don't know what Australia has in terms of UFO coverage. You guys actually have one of the most... There's a great deal of UFO lore... Oh, I know. ...in Australia.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
There's nothing else to do but look at the sky. Yeah.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
Which one? It's called Parham. Please. Please, he's obsessed.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
Oh. Now, is that a base?
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
South Australia? Yeah. Because we went through South Australia. We drove to Snowtown. Lovely place.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
And then he's in the Snowtown. He went straight to Snowtown. We were in Adelaide for 28 hours. And we were like, you know what? Let's drive to Snowtown. What were you doing?
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
Yeah. You were doing a show. We had a tour in Australia and New Zealand last year. Oh, my God.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
Adelaide was one of our best shows in the fucking entire little tour.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
It was funny. It was like there were literally three dudes in the front row that were like the Three Stooges. They were beating each other up the whole show and like throwing beers at each other. It was amazing. But it was very funny. It was like they weren't even that disruptive. You know what I mean? Like they were kind of just amongst themselves.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
But we went to Snowtown and they literally looked at us because they know why we're there. Like why are these three fat Americans here? And they were like, what brings you to town? And we're all like, just driving. Indian food. Just.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
Not that I love better than a true crime story that's scratch and sniff. Oh my God. I forgot to offer you guys. Would you like some cheese crackers? Knife? I'd love some cheese crackers. Would you like your favorite snack, which is a knife?
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
Man, you are two fucking larrikins, aren't you?
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
No, you got blood all over the carpet. He did a real, you should probably not. Oh, yeah, it's the shining carpet. Yeah, it's the shining carpet. We're very on brand here.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
We're very, very on brand here. The plants are fake. We got a lot of accoutrement. That's from, oh, that is from a wonderful place we hear, it's called Lowe's. What a wonderful place here. Oh, alien. We have a lot of shit. All right, so, but you know, if you ever want to come to, like, Contact in the Desert is awesome, but it's like, we're all true believers.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
It's the first place that I've ever been to where I went to this place. It's at this resort near Palm Springs, Contact in the Desert, and we...
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
i kind of thought we'd all be getting drunk and being in the pool and it's like all of these nerds in the lobby talking about ufos they are they make me they're like dressed up by like galactic fighters and stuff and i am out of place i must like i thought i was a serious one i'm used to like literally alienating people making people upset i was like y'all are alienating me like i was like you guys should be in the pool this is
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
But Nope kind of made it into sort of like a creature feature. It was Jaws. Yeah, like more than an alien movie. I still think you guys got an alien movie.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
There's no way you guys don't have an alien movie.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
Dude, Travis Long spoke at the festival last year and then at night he's playing guitar by the fire. You've got to come to this fucking festival. The guy from Fire in the Sky is there like flirting with like, he's like hanging out.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
I really think that you're, because, you know, it's very real.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
We love to leave them out.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
Don't even worry about it. Do you know all this stuff? But I was researching about how United States had nuclear weapons bases in Australia pointed at North Korea. And when we decommissioned all those bases, then all of this UFO, like, this is all in the last, like, three years.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
There was, like, a massive influx of Australian UFO stories that were hidden for a long time because they were all now told by guys that are decommissioned officers from those old bases.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
Yeah, bring it back. You've got to check it out.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
Yeah, I feel good. They're Australian, so they're naturally immune to certain types of damage. Yeah. Luckily, we brought a barbed wire back. Listen, before we plug any more of these films, I need you to eat a light bulb. You've got to see it. It's visceral. It's bloody. It's good. It's nice. You do that just for the thrill of it, or is it one of those where you just love physical action?
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
What if we are barely acknowledged by them? What if half the phenomena could be interdimensional? So what if when we see something that looks like an amorphous, floating, kind of cube-y type thing, that is our translation in this dimension of a craft that is literally going on a grocery store run in another dimension that might look like one of those things from Starfleet. They're not even in it.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
I mean, there has to be.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
You're fired. It's the BT. Yeah, yeah, yeah. God damn it, what are you doing?
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
Yeah, you crashed on Earth again.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
Take a look at this. I got the keys to Dad's car. We're going on a come on with the alien booze. You know, like, that's the stuff that's fun. Yeah, but going back to what you said, it's hard to get a picture of that stuff because you're so in shock when you see it. Like, right now, going back to my dying dog, all right? I got a 17-year-old dog that has seizures, okay?
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
And every time she has a seizure, I'm supposed to get a video of it. Be careful with the knife. I'm supposed to get a video of it for the vet. But every time, I'm, like, worried about the seizure. So by the time I get the video out, she's done seizing. That's the same thing as with the aliens. Yeah, it really is. You're so in shock.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
Yeah, him filming his elderly dog seizing is definitely the same as intergalactic travelers. No, I see it.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
All right, just give us three talk-to-me sequel concepts that you were going to do before we go.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
We're not allowed. Yes, it's right there.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
Because they're written out. Michael, ask him another question before we go. I'll pitch you one. All right? You ready? I love it. Go. M. Bison. Okay? He's sitting there. We've already got that one. That one's written down. All right. Fede Alvarez. Dude, you write it as you, as directors, super meta, you get the hand. Yeah, but that's like number 11. Yeah, that's when we really get desperate.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
Me too. Can't wait. It's going to come.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
Please don't make him come. All right.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
Already done. Written.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
That's the retcon. Yep. Talk to me in Tokyo. Yep. Tokyo Drift. I was also thinking of one. Look who's talking to me now. Yes. Oh, yes. I love that.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
You can get a producer credit for that one. It gets a long pinky nail and it does coke for people and shit. Now we're getting silly, Eddie. No, we're not. We're getting good.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
No. Full penetration. Talk 12. No, that one didn't hit.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
That one didn't hit as much. Unless it's in a heist and it's like Ocean's 12 and then you have George Clooney having to steal the hand from a casino vault.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
Oh, that's disgusting. Yeah. That would honestly make... Why is it if it's a foot, I'd vomit if I saw the film? Then you have to suck on the top toe or whatever. There was a sucking of top toe in that movie. There's plenty of toe sucking in the film or anything. That was toe sucking in the movie. Did you vomit? No. Well, no, but not if it's... Toe sucking was actually kind of peaceful.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
You're gross. Oh, you liked that scene. Yeah. He mouth kisses the dog. He sucks on his wife's toes. And he's a huge fan of your films. And he's just so excited.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
He is the guy. These are the best movies I've ever seen. You're marketing it towards him. How about, oh, the porno one should be cock to me. Oh, cock to me. Yes. Yes.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
Oh, of course. Seriously?
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
Dude, that is a high level of praise.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
I didn't watch it that intensely. Come to me. You filmed it, Danny.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
It's only harassment if you're in the film.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
Bring her back. Why? It's definitely like, I was like a half hour in and I'm like, oh, this isn't as bad. I can handle this. And then it's just so unforgivingly brutal. It really is. And it's just like, it made me visibly upset. I literally turned it off. I don't think I could have seen it in the movie theater.
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Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
I'm going to now because I've seen it already, and so now I feel like I can see it in a movie theater because I know what's going to happen. I'm just going to watch the audience get pissed. It brought me a level of discomfort that I haven't experienced since. Have you seen The Coffee Table? I have not yet. The Coffee Table's fucked up.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
Oh, I thought you were talking about the scene in the movie, but that's different. No, I'm talking about a movie called The Coffee Table. Oh, check it out. That is fucked up.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
fucked up but you know what i like is when it doesn't feel like it's just exploitation that is like that's what that's why it messed me up yeah yeah because it was real and it was best in emotions and like you know as people as someone who's experienced loss you're a fragile person and you make these horrible decisions that's why sally hawkins character is fucking unbelievable in that movie because you could tell we were talking about this before you got here that she used to be a really good person
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Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
You feel for her.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
She really is. Now I'm just spoiling it. That's the ending. You guys, honestly, the ending's amazing. You have to see the film. What would you say is a series of references for you guys? Your films. What are your main go-to films in your head?
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
Also kind of wet.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
It actually is a good film. Is that the one with, not with French Stuart? They're hunting mice, yeah. Have you seen Stuart Little? I haven't seen Stuart Little, but I know the film. Indian in the Cupboard? Have you seen that? Nothing I would love to see is the mouse hunt to bring her back pipeline.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
It was out of envy. You guys had fun charges, though. I looked at your Wikipedia pages. Your charges are fun. Yeah, yeah. We've had a few fun charges. Yeah, yeah. They're not, nothing bad. Like, really, like, nothing. Just the stuff that honestly just excited me about you.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
You know who's funny? There's an actor in that that I used to love that I haven't seen in forever. It's Lee Evans.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
Yeah, where the hell's Lee Evans now?
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
No, I don't think. I would do Mouse Hunt 2. You should put him in one of your movies. Yeah, I should do Mouse Hunt 2. You should put Lee Evans in one of your movies. Hey, listen. No, no, come here. This is what my parents always do. Be like, hey, have you ever tried being in a film, like a big movie? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Have you ever thought about making Seinfeld? That's what my parents would say.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
Oh, very nice. Well, I have an American Express. Yes.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
Did you show him that? Your parents? I had to go see it with my mother, yeah. Oh, my gosh. Yeah, it was horrible. I saw it with my mother, too, actually. She was fine with it. She was happy that she was getting attention. Oh, she was getting attention. Well, just in terms of just being there, my mom just kind of believed that she was on display.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
she doesn't like flying I understand it's a fucking horrible flight it's a terrible flight it's long and she has anxiety about it and A24 were trying to do everything like oh what if we can bring a friend what if we can up the class and then my mom still said no no it's yeah but you know she will see it though you guys and she'll be damn proud yeah she'll be so proud she'll be damn proud of what she made she made the film
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
Because she made you. She did.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
Wow. That's amazing. So she's a sweet mother. Wow.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
What a wonderful tribute.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
I believed you. You're a stuntman.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
Sally insisted she had to hit the blind girl. She insisted.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
Really? Yeah, it was her first time acting. All of the acting in both of the films was incredible. I was so impressed, especially because I didn't recognize anybody, obviously, because it's Australian films, and I was so impressed by the acting in every way. Obviously, I'm sure you guys had a lot to do with that, but they all scared the shit out of me, and I believe the hell out of all of them.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
I also think that you are setting a good benchmark for responsible auteurs making stuff. Because, like, again, you name two auteurs, like William Friedkin, Roman Polanski, both famously not great guys. What was wrong with William Friedkin? Well, William Friedkin was just a crazy guy. He was crazy. He's crazy. But you guys were, that's just wonderful to see. You're setting a great new tone.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
And you're not only setting a great friendly tone, but you're also making truly horrible and horrendous movies. And that's the fucking best shit in the world. I can't wait to make another movie. Yeah, dude. I just want to be on set already. It's getting there, man. Don't worry. They'll force you. They're going to make it. So check out Bring Her Back. Please.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
One of the, I'm going to say it's probably the best horror movie of the year. So far? Already. Yeah, so far, yeah. I mean, we saw Sinners. It's like Sinners, obviously, it's like Sinners and this are like, they're going to be, you know, you and Ryan Coogler are going to have to fight. It's a big year. We might have to fight. You might have to fight him physically.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
He's going to kick the shit out of you.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
So Danny, Michael, Filippo, thank you for lowering yourself. We enjoyed being here. Go have fun in New York. Promote the shit out of this thing, man.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
Guys, thank you so fucking much, man.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
Yes, I was in there. No, you weren't.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
I don't know why this lie has been thrown around. And then the cops came and found you while you were in the middle of shooting, right? Is that the idea?
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
Anything but getting arrested over making art is one of my favorite things in the face of the planet.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
It's called capitalism.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
And I was like, I don't. What? I've got a business class flight. They're like, you can't get in.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
Okay, let's get to movies. Let's get to some movies. I love books. That's my favorite kind of movie. One that I'm directing inside of my own brain. I can cast it with all of my favorite porn stars. That's my favorite. I but when I watch your movies, the first thing I noticed, which is that one of my favorite attributes is that they feel extremely lived in.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
Like they feel like like talk to me feels like you're watching a story that's already happened before. And now it's happening again, which is also why talk to me. The sequel will also be perfect at some point whenever that comes out. You better do it.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
And then Bring Her Back is kind of also the same where you're dropped into a world that's already going. First thing I want to know is when you make that, like with the hand in Talk To Me and with the story in Bring Her Back, do you know that entire story before you write the film? Because it seems like you know what's going on, but you leave sections behind.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
They want to make sure you know there's a place you can't get into. In Australia, if you just have a good enough ticket, they'll let you in. Here, they tell you to go screw.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
Have you seen the bong? The bowl? The weed bowl that was made out of the hand? Oh, yes.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
Yeah, yeah. That's great. That's good stuff.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
It's a tobacco pipe. That's what we say.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
That's my favorite. That's my favorite. I love it. It's like why I like all the stuff where you're dropped in the center. Now your job as the viewer.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
It reminds me of The Shining.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
The two of you together are close to a half a Kubrick, right?
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
Maybe a quarter, maybe a quarter. But yeah, I love that because my biggest pet peeve with horror movies is when they over-explain shit. And you guys really leave it up to us to figure out. And it's scarier that way because my imagination runs wild. I'm sure you know the answers, but I honestly don't want to know the fucking answer.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
This is the kind of juice we need.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
I think that you guys are also bringing up, which is the hour, you know, probably closer to a younger generation, but also with my generation of the discovery. Like our parents had finding weird shit in the woods. Yeah. We had finding weird shit on the Internet. Yeah. And we saw a thing, but in the street, but like we saw mysterious things on the internet and we, that was what inspired us.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
welcome to last podcast and love we have a very special episode here we have two of one of my newest truly favorite movie creators what you guys are doing is fucking out of this world the new movie bring her back is coming out it's now it's out now right yes by the time you hear this it's out right now it's out now bring her back the directors of talk to me as well danny filippo and michael filippo welcome
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
And I think what Talk To Me and Bring Her Back are doing is understanding there's the same amount of mystery in the modern world as there was in the old world. And I feel like that's what you're bringing back. In fact, I feel like there's more mystery in the modern world.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
You'd think it would be, but it's still things you can't scratch. It's still like, what did I just see? Is that real? Is that fake?
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
It's terrifying. And also you have Sally Hawkins in Bring Her Back who's legitimately like a Patriot Missile actor. Yes. That is somebody who... What a fuck. That's like driving a fucking Bentley.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
She really does make quite a bit of wet movies.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
Yeah, oh, there's water in it?
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
Can I be moist in the sand?
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
She dropped the little pieces of lore in the middle of her extreme acting that you can like, but you were like, I'm watching it too, being like, oh, she just, she's threading the needle of all the info.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
Wow. But she's nice in person.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
Oh, I fucking bet, dude. Can I ask this? Okay. Again, I'm trying not to bring any real, distinct spoilers for the film.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
Rob brought this up. My wife and I both kind of pinged this, too. Talk to me and bring her back in the same world. Maybe. Yeah.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
I don't know who said that.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
Mysterious. The podcast is haunted. They seem to be like they're kind of, because they both revolve around, we're both like, it's like a mysterious object. It has an amazing, it has some storied past between the hand and the tape.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
We've got to get out of this goddamn neighborhood. This block's horrible. See, you guys don't mind the Australian accent?
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
Thank you for having us.
Last Podcast On The Left
Bring Her Back: An Interview with Danny & Michael Philippou
Yeah, it's true. You know, it's so funny because you even say that. No, honestly, I think one of the most incredible things you've done with also both is make believable friend groups and believable families and looks like they all hang out and they all belong together. I felt like I knew them. I didn't even notice the accent, to be honest with you.
Last Podcast On The Left
Episode 610: Lori Vallow and Chad Daybell - The Doomsday Murders Part II - Ticking Time Bomb
It's Stinky Pete. Ha! Ha!
Last Podcast On The Left
Episode 610: Lori Vallow and Chad Daybell - The Doomsday Murders Part II - Ticking Time Bomb
All right.
Last Podcast On The Left
Episode 610: Lori Vallow and Chad Daybell - The Doomsday Murders Part II - Ticking Time Bomb
What happens if I do not have the money available at any point in my natural life? I would like to have anybody who's ever not said that to a creditor to do it once.
Last Podcast On The Left
Episode 610: Lori Vallow and Chad Daybell - The Doomsday Murders Part II - Ticking Time Bomb
Yeah.
Last Podcast On The Left
Episode 610: Lori Vallow and Chad Daybell - The Doomsday Murders Part II - Ticking Time Bomb
A dollop of a man he is.
Last Podcast On The Left
Episode 610: Lori Vallow and Chad Daybell - The Doomsday Murders Part II - Ticking Time Bomb
After you're out of the Mormon church, go ahead. Have at it. Strap them on, man. It's more man.
Last Podcast On The Left
Episode 610: Lori Vallow and Chad Daybell - The Doomsday Murders Part II - Ticking Time Bomb
That's my first piece of advice. My second piece of advice is, suck them while you got them. Because he's gay. Yes.
Last Podcast On The Left
Episode 610: Lori Vallow and Chad Daybell - The Doomsday Murders Part II - Ticking Time Bomb
Dude.
Last Podcast On The Left
Episode 610: Lori Vallow and Chad Daybell - The Doomsday Murders Part II - Ticking Time Bomb
fucking idiot. I knew it was coming. I knew it was coming. You can't get me. I'm gonna piss on you while you sleep. I'm gonna bring you to your house. I'm gonna watch you sleep. No, that's getting me. That's getting me. That's how I'm gonna get you. That's how I'm gonna get you.
Last Podcast On The Left
Episode 610: Lori Vallow and Chad Daybell - The Doomsday Murders Part II - Ticking Time Bomb
Three of the BGs did not die of AIDS. I thought Barry Gibb died of AIDS. Barry Gibb didn't die of AIDS.
Last Podcast On The Left
Episode 610: Lori Vallow and Chad Daybell - The Doomsday Murders Part II - Ticking Time Bomb
Tammy, are you ready for my cream of wheat?
Last Podcast On The Left
Episode 619: Martin Bryant Part II - The Port Arthur Massacre
there's no place to escape to this is the last on the left that's when the cannibalism started oh god
Last Podcast On The Left
Episode 619: Martin Bryant Part II - The Port Arthur Massacre
I didn't go to 10 years of creepy medical school.
Last Podcast On The Left
Episode 619: Martin Bryant Part II - The Port Arthur Massacre
Oh, God, I don't want to suck them. I'd be doing it, right? I'd be doing it.
Last Podcast On The Left
Episode 619: Martin Bryant Part II - The Port Arthur Massacre
You're like... My smoothie's gone!
Last Podcast On The Left
Episode 619: Martin Bryant Part II - The Port Arthur Massacre
That's a direct quote.
Last Podcast On The Left
Episode 619: Martin Bryant Part II - The Port Arthur Massacre
Bill Gillian Anderson. Yeah.
Last Podcast On The Left
Episode 614: Pyromania
Oh my God, now I have a new career trajectory. You just got to go to school.
Last Podcast On The Left
Episode 614: Pyromania
Yeah, it was a beautiful statement, Marcus. And I, too, would like to take this moment to come out as part human, part picky. Well, you're just bad, Eddie. It took years and many surgeries to turn my hooves into human feet. And to this day, I still enjoy rolling around in my own shit. He does. Solving puzzles meant for toddlers. But, you know, I think I'm on the path to becoming full human.
Last Podcast On The Left
Episode 614: Pyromania
I'm just saying the picnic basket was asking for it.
Last Podcast On The Left
Episode 614: Pyromania
Yeah. The Australian fire right before COVID that everyone kind of forgot about because of COVID was like way worse than our fire.
Last Podcast On The Left
Episode 614: Pyromania
Oh, my God. It's going well, dude. Yeah, it's been wonderful. I've been getting some blankets. I've been put out. You know what? Fuck ants. All right. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Pro bear, anti-ant. Anti, ooh, I guess anti is already, it's already in the word.
Last Podcast On The Left
Episode 614: Pyromania
Now... Interestingly enough, this is exactly why we have such problems with fire in Los Angeles. Because back in the day, in the late 1800s, they planted eucalyptus trees all over Los Angeles. No shit. So Los Angeles is actually covered in eucalyptus trees. And there was several different times when they were used because they liked the way they looked and the way they smelled.
Last Podcast On The Left
Episode 614: Pyromania
And so they were planted all over Los Angeles. And now that's kind of what's been fucking us. It's all the old eucalyptus trees that are everywhere. And they just catch so easily. I learned that from some gardener. That's crazy. I didn't know that.
Last Podcast On The Left
Episode 614: Pyromania
Yeah, they thought it was a good idea because it's really good at absorbing wind because they're real bushy. And so like the wind was like, you know, it would hit that and it wouldn't hit you that hard. But, you know, obviously the wind.
Last Podcast On The Left
Episode 614: Pyromania
Subtle. Sexy. There's nothing wrong with a 38 waist.
Last Podcast On The Left
Episode 614: Pyromania
Also, I got to tell, this is a good warning for everyone. As a dog owner, don't picnic directly under the tree because that's where the dogs pee. They pee against the tree and under the tree. So if you're just eating on a big pile of piss. Yeah.
Last Podcast On The Left
Episode 614: Pyromania
Yes. And there's nothing wrong with a little light skulking.
Last Podcast On The Left
Episode 614: Pyromania
Just a pinch. I mean, just a pinch is still a pedophile. Just a pinch is the gateway to pedophilia.
Last Podcast On The Left
Episode 614: Pyromania
I was wondering why you were laughing so hard at my movie.
Last Podcast On The Left
Episode 614: Pyromania
You are fatter now. I know I saw you yesterday, but you're fatter now.
Last Podcast On The Left
Episode 614: Pyromania
That's very interesting. Whenever I meet someone who, like, obviously has severe autism, I just try to find out what their thing is, whether it's, like, 80s rock or just rocks, you know? And you just drill them on that, and you learn a lot.
Last Podcast On The Left
Episode 614: Pyromania
Yes, unlike. Yes. I did great in football. They loved me.
Last Podcast On The Left
Episode 614: Pyromania
A buddy of mine lit a tennis ball on fire, threw it in the yard across the street, and the whole yard caught fire. That was awesome.
Last Podcast On The Left
Episode 614: Pyromania
I have never set a public fire. I'm very lucky that Florida is as moist as it is.
Last Podcast On The Left
Episode 614: Pyromania
Yeah, me too. We used to go behind Publix and steal all the pallets of wood that they would just leave outside. Then we'd bring them to the middle of the woods and have giant bonfires. A bonfire is different.
Last Podcast On The Left
Episode 614: Pyromania
Oh, my God. Right after Christmas, we lighten up everyone's trees. That was the best bonfire of the year. Like January, we all lit our Christmas trees on fire. But one asshole wouldn't take the ornaments off. And so it was a fucking lot of smoke, a lot of weird plastic.
Last Podcast On The Left
Episode 614: Pyromania
God, our lives are just fucking so weird. We're very lucky.
Last Podcast On The Left
Episode 614: Pyromania
And you could use that, again, because when I used to have to ride the Greyhound bus all the time, I would, like, while they're loading on the bus, I'd get in, you know, and I'd grab a seat, and then, you know, if there was a seat open next to me, I would just, like, pretend to, like, chew on my lips and shit.
Last Podcast On The Left
Episode 614: Pyromania
And, like, be all weird and crazy. You also taught me the skill of... And then make sure that nobody would sit next to me, and then it worked.
Last Podcast On The Left
Episode 614: Pyromania
It's wild. Yeah. You put some lighter fluid in the middle of it, and then you light it, and it goes out, and then when you hit it with a rake, it goes off again. It's fucking fun. It just popped like little popcorn, guys. Fuck ants.
Last Podcast On The Left
Episode 614: Pyromania
Remember when we almost lit Adam's apartment building on fire during Dollmaker?
Last Podcast On The Left
Episode 614: Pyromania
Yeah, we put like four candles in the same cup and then they all just like ignited together and produced this giant flame and then we hit it with water.
Last Podcast On The Left
Episode 614: Pyromania
They had to, right? Well, it was so high up. How were they going to squirt it?
Last Podcast On The Left
Episode 614: Pyromania
I know he's a bad guy, but the trolling is unbelievable.
Last Podcast On The Left
Episode 614: Pyromania
Man, and ever since I was a kid, every time I bend down or sit down, I just go, ah! Now I just do it naturally.
Last Podcast On The Left
Episode 614: Pyromania
They should have banished him to Bedavia's graveyard. Yeah.
Last Podcast On The Left
Episode 614: Pyromania
and he knew every single thing and then he did the same thing I don't remember until he showed up at the building he's like oh yeah went up to this side and went like this the flames were about this high and he was just like well he loved it that music video he made was amazing with the reverse mohawk and he's dancing in the sewers and stuff get away get away get away get away now no I'm the no no I'm the fire starter twisted fire starter that's right wow prodigy he was a prodigy yeah that guy died yep really yeah fire
Last Podcast On The Left
Episode 614: Pyromania
It's like they tried to name it hell, but their horrible accents made it whole.
Last Podcast On The Left
Episode 614: Pyromania
If there was like a prize and like a contest, I would do that. We should set it up. Sure. But then you'd have to beat me.
Last Podcast On The Left
Episode 614: Pyromania
Yeah, they always end up catching themselves on fire by at least 40. You know what it is? Suspenders. Yeah, super flammable.
Last Podcast On The Left
Episode 614: Pyromania
Now, do you think he was trying to kill the people or do you think he was just trying to set fires?
Last Podcast On The Left
Episode 614: Pyromania
By the way, looking this up right now, paraffin oil is only $16.99 a gallon on Amazon.
Last Podcast On The Left
Episode 614: Pyromania
Yeah. It's kind of like in our necrophilia episode, a lot of the people involved were EMTs. Yeah. You know.
Last Podcast On The Left
Episode 614: Pyromania
Isn't it crazy, though? It kills a bunch of nice people. They don't investigate it, but it kills three assholes. And they're like, I think this is murder.
Last Podcast On The Left
Episode 614: Pyromania
Hey, the LAFD did extremely good work here in the city. I'm just kidding. I like to make fun of people who are obviously good.
Last Podcast On The Left
Episode 614: Pyromania
You know, it's fucking real. You mean it when you rip open a cereal box and you just start writing on the inside.
Last Podcast On The Left
Episode 614: Pyromania
If you really loved Bruce Lee, you would have became water, not fire.
Last Podcast On The Left
Episode 614: Pyromania
Do you think that she rejected him because he was jerking off her brothers?
Last Podcast On The Left
Episode 614: Pyromania
This really would have been a great finale for the British office.
Last Podcast On The Left
Episode 614: Pyromania
And we all know that stars are made of fire. And we brought it all back around.
Last Podcast On The Left
Episode 614: Pyromania
That's right. Detroit is our next one. That's going to be on April 18th at the Masonic. That's going to be unbelievable.
Last Podcast On The Left
Episode 614: Pyromania
And so don't try to start having a conversation with Henry in the middle of the show. I think it's a good advice in general is every time you take a hallucinogen and you start to flip out, just remind yourself, I'm on acid. Yeah.
Last Podcast On The Left
Episode 614: Pyromania
Yeah, it might end in 13 hours, but it will eventually end.
Last Podcast On The Left
Episode 614: Pyromania
We also got a whole bunch of new dates on the website, so make sure you check that out. We're booked for the rest of the year. Come check us out on tour.
Last Podcast On The Left
Episode 614: Pyromania
Whatever town we're going to come in. On. On. In about. Hail Satan. Hail game. Hail Arthur Brown.
Last Podcast On The Left
Episode 614: Pyromania
Oh, yeah. That's why firemen become firemen. For the hose. That's worth it. E-D-D-I-E-T-U-N-E-S dot com.
Last Podcast On The Left
Episode 614: Pyromania
Sometimes little Darlene didn't get all the good DNA. Yeah, and if little Darlene didn't exist, maybe you'd have a nice little Timmy. You know, with someone else. And that Timmy's going to be a lawyer, you know, instead of a fucking... A good lawyer. Yeah, that's right.
Last Podcast On The Left
Episode 614: Pyromania
Yeah. And she's not even in the movie. She's in the end of the film. She's barely in the fucking movie. I made him watch it.
Last Podcast On The Left
Episode 614: Pyromania
I'm so mad about that. I couldn't believe it. What the fuck? Why call it that? But it is nice because then it changes.
Last Podcast On The Left
Strange Customs: An Interview with Sasha Sagan
Do you want to listen to Last Podcast on the Left without ads? Do you want extra content? Do you want to see what it's like behind the scenes? Patreon.com slash Last Podcast on the Left. Very special day today. Oh, absolutely. Very special. Will we rise to the occasion? I hope so. You better. I have to. I'm looking at you, Eddie.
Last Podcast On The Left
Strange Customs: An Interview with Sasha Sagan
We're trying. We are trying. Obviously, also, I don't want to always be like famous daughter, but you know, like you're the famous daughter of someone is the saddest, you know what I mean? But it's not not when it's like this.
Last Podcast On The Left
Strange Customs: An Interview with Sasha Sagan
It's just like, just give me the money up front.
Last Podcast On The Left
Strange Customs: An Interview with Sasha Sagan
No one just spends money. They're either looking for votes or they're looking for something else. They got something on you now.
Last Podcast On The Left
Strange Customs: An Interview with Sasha Sagan
The tooth fairy is Jeffrey Epstein. Yeah. Sasha's thinking, kind of has to ask though, is it more of the tooth fairy for some reason? Is it more here in America or is it across the globe?
Last Podcast On The Left
Strange Customs: An Interview with Sasha Sagan
Yeah, I don't know if necessarily everybody's paying off their kids. Fly from your grave.
Last Podcast On The Left
Strange Customs: An Interview with Sasha Sagan
Yeah, it was the last time he died.
Last Podcast On The Left
Strange Customs: An Interview with Sasha Sagan
If you could just wrap that up pretty good, that'd be great. You could take your belief system and sort of kind of wrap that up.
Last Podcast On The Left
Strange Customs: An Interview with Sasha Sagan
Oh, yeah. Because what can you do? Because like Carl Sagan is your father. If I followed my father's work, I'd be in prison. Yeah, exactly. If I followed my father's work, I'd be drunk at Hogs and Heifers right now.
Last Podcast On The Left
Strange Customs: An Interview with Sasha Sagan
And I do believe everything can eventually be chased down and charted. But I do think partially it's because the would you say even the bandwidth for what you'd consider evidence also kind of expands with science and technology and understanding.
Last Podcast On The Left
Strange Customs: An Interview with Sasha Sagan
So it's like, can I actually, we'll just start with that. Like as the daughter of Carl Sagan, like, does it start like. Do people immediately assume, obviously, I know you're a genius because I was reading your essays. You know, you're very smart. That's way too kind. But you're very smart. But it's the idea of, like, people, when they roll up, are they, like, nervous?
Last Podcast On The Left
Strange Customs: An Interview with Sasha Sagan
Do you think that there's a standardized version of science across the universe itself?
Last Podcast On The Left
Strange Customs: An Interview with Sasha Sagan
Like, let's say we go to another place, right? Like, because I'm certain, does this extend to, like, alien life? Like, the idea that there's probably some form, right? I mean, I don't know. We don't have the evidence, right? So the idea of an alien race living on another planet, like, with a society that can think, that's just kind of conjecture, technically. But where do you stand on it?
Last Podcast On The Left
Strange Customs: An Interview with Sasha Sagan
Yeah, do you think that if you go to another place, do you think that in another solar system, in another galaxy, would physics change? Would our stuff change? Or is the belief of science that there is a running theme that would hold true? Is it possible that things could be entirely different in another part of the universe?
Last Podcast On The Left
Strange Customs: An Interview with Sasha Sagan
Or are they, like, or is it all, like, what's daddy like? What was daddy like? Or is it all, like, because you want to find the heart of the man. You sound like, you know, this wonderful, benevolent, sweet man. So what's it like? having to walk around with it. Is it a burden or a wonderful treasure?
Last Podcast On The Left
Strange Customs: An Interview with Sasha Sagan
Because I feel like almost in a way, that's not faith. You're looking for evidence. But almost in a way, it feels like science has this kind of... There's a faith in the idea that our ideas of science will hold. Right. Maybe you're testing.
Last Podcast On The Left
Strange Customs: An Interview with Sasha Sagan
Unless we do then find out that all science has, like, there's, like, a bottom law. Like, there's, like, something that we're all connected to, which is what I think is literally the hope. We hope that it would all... I feel like scientists would be... I'd say the term would be fucked if they ended into another section of the universe and they're like, oh no, the fuel stopped working.
Last Podcast On The Left
Strange Customs: An Interview with Sasha Sagan
The stuff stopped working. We're screwed. Yeah.
Last Podcast On The Left
Strange Customs: An Interview with Sasha Sagan
Because in Los Angeles, we have to talk in astrology. I hope you understand that.
Last Podcast On The Left
Strange Customs: An Interview with Sasha Sagan
And they're like, oh, of course you would be intense about that.
Last Podcast On The Left
Strange Customs: An Interview with Sasha Sagan
You're just destroying the market here. Okay? There's a lot of stuff that we got. A lot of stuff is hinging on astrology here. I'm sure.
Last Podcast On The Left
Strange Customs: An Interview with Sasha Sagan
I didn't even know that. I had no idea like how fully involved she was in the fact that like hunting for it for years, trying to get the Cosmos remake. Wow.
Last Podcast On The Left
Strange Customs: An Interview with Sasha Sagan
Burning all their tapestries. You know, throwing the incense out.
Last Podcast On The Left
Strange Customs: An Interview with Sasha Sagan
Even the core of the religion that they are believing in doesn't actually reflect what they're doing. So, you know, like obviously look at the Christian nation state they want to build. It is specifically like, you know, it seemed that Jesus was a easygoing guy. You know what I mean? The whole thing, the live and let live thing, all that kind of horseshit that you talked about.
Last Podcast On The Left
Strange Customs: An Interview with Sasha Sagan
Yes. Taking care of the sick, all that kind of stuff.
Last Podcast On The Left
Strange Customs: An Interview with Sasha Sagan
I really do. I have had it up to here with the Christian crystal fascist nationalists.
Last Podcast On The Left
Strange Customs: An Interview with Sasha Sagan
But we got each other's backs no matter what. Yeah.
Last Podcast On The Left
Strange Customs: An Interview with Sasha Sagan
The Lord itself. Yeah. Watching you. I just do it. It's just so fun. I think that what you're saying is correct. It's really because we the concept of people want a group to belong to. Cause it's scary out there. Totally. It's scary out there and it's hard.
Last Podcast On The Left
Strange Customs: An Interview with Sasha Sagan
And I think that people are willing to join a group, especially like, you know, what we're seeing in current American politics, which is this idea of like the, for one side, the barrier to entry is extremely low. All you have to do is show up and they kind of accept you no matter what spectrum of hatred you bring to the fold. Do you know what I mean? They're kind of happy almost.
Last Podcast On The Left
Strange Customs: An Interview with Sasha Sagan
They're like, Oh, look, we got a new type of hate. Yeah. Wow. That's amazing. Look how diverse our hate is. I think, which is truly incredible. Like honestly, in a way of how many spectrums of hate there is and, and how they can find community. Why can't we on the other side?
Last Podcast On The Left
Strange Customs: An Interview with Sasha Sagan
Yeah, it's nice. It's not another crazy person I roll in here.
Last Podcast On The Left
Strange Customs: An Interview with Sasha Sagan
Well, that's how I kind of felt, too. I was obsessed with being a priest as a little boy, and it was really just because... Oh, yeah, but it was because I realized over time it was because he had guaranteed time.
Last Podcast On The Left
Strange Customs: An Interview with Sasha Sagan
The priest had an hour every week where everybody had to show up and believe everything that that guy had to say, and he could say whatever he wanted, and then eventually realized, like, oh, I could be a comedian. Yeah. Like, I don't need this power. Yes. You know, like, I could do...
Last Podcast On The Left
Strange Customs: An Interview with Sasha Sagan
Not unless we're trying to break into Vatican City podcast market, which has honestly been very difficult.
Last Podcast On The Left
Strange Customs: An Interview with Sasha Sagan
It is so hard to get into the papacy podcast world.
Last Podcast On The Left
Strange Customs: An Interview with Sasha Sagan
Thank you for Squarespace. You use code BIGPOP90 for Squarespace.
Last Podcast On The Left
Strange Customs: An Interview with Sasha Sagan
The whole point of Satanism is that it is an edgelord system. political position I am a Satanist and I believe in that the idea that like you're just supposed to remind everybody like you know the church needs the devil you know like that's the whole thing here there's like a whole thing
Last Podcast On The Left
Strange Customs: An Interview with Sasha Sagan
thing here where like there's a whole side of this story that's not being told which is this this serpent gave them the ability to be wise like it gave humans the ability to not because that's the idea they were living in a fantasy world and they were living in the garden of eden which is essentially a really nice cage and then the devil came and released 24 hour a day surveillance yeah yeah
Last Podcast On The Left
Strange Customs: An Interview with Sasha Sagan
And then we gave people autonomy. But then that's the problem, isn't it? And then it's been the problem ever since. And so here we are. Here we are. Thank you so much. This has been wonderful. Sasha, you're a delight. This is wonderful.
Last Podcast On The Left
Strange Customs: An Interview with Sasha Sagan
I just enjoyed this so much. Thank you. Please buy the book for small creatures such as we by Sasha Sagan. Anything you want to leave people on any, anything you want, any socials. I know you, you must love tick tock. You must love social media.
Last Podcast On The Left
Strange Customs: An Interview with Sasha Sagan
Honestly, let's get down to brass tacks. I'm so glad you asked. Yeah.
Last Podcast On The Left
Strange Customs: An Interview with Sasha Sagan
No, we're running it. It's not good out there. No, millennials are sadly in charge of TikTok. It's not good. That's even worse.
Last Podcast On The Left
Strange Customs: An Interview with Sasha Sagan
Thank you. And go check out the podcast, Strange Customs. Because it's still out, right? Yeah. Are you still hosting it actively?
Last Podcast On The Left
Strange Customs: An Interview with Sasha Sagan
Such a Scorpio. Can't believe it. I walked right into that one. Thank you so much for being with us.
Last Podcast On The Left
Strange Customs: An Interview with Sasha Sagan
Why did Biden send hurricanes to Florida?
Last Podcast On The Left
Strange Customs: An Interview with Sasha Sagan
Yeah, it's not normal. Like, you know, you don't have to roll in. We don't have to go like, yes, of course, vampires. They are an unignored constituency. And they really do. Where is Kamala on this? Thank you, our wonderful, intrepid Patreon listeners. I am Henry Zabrowski. I'm sitting here with Ed Larson. Hello. And we have a very special guest today. Someone, again, we talked right before.
Last Podcast On The Left
Strange Customs: An Interview with Sasha Sagan
But I kind of feel like it's why we're at where we're at right now in terms of the temperament of the country is that we track when we travel in the world of conspiracy theory all the time.
Last Podcast On The Left
Strange Customs: An Interview with Sasha Sagan
And it is funny because it is as much of a faith as anything else, because you kind of believe that like a faith in the deep state means that you believe that there's a daddy somewhere making sure that there is a plan.
Last Podcast On The Left
Strange Customs: An Interview with Sasha Sagan
Yes. Now, do you find that that's like what led you towards investigating the customs of humans? Yes.
Last Podcast On The Left
Strange Customs: An Interview with Sasha Sagan
Like what's a custom? Like, what do you mean by like a, like, Oh wait, like what do you call it?
Last Podcast On The Left
Strange Customs: An Interview with Sasha Sagan
There's a, I think there's a distinct difference between ritual and spirituality when it comes to our species. Right. Do you think it's connected? Do you think it's, there's a, like we, as a, as a, like, like a primate, we must have rituals.
Last Podcast On The Left
Strange Customs: An Interview with Sasha Sagan
Very bright. Very smart. I don't know what we're going to do with this person.
Last Podcast On The Left
Strange Customs: An Interview with Sasha Sagan
That's so fascinating. Do you think it would be better for young men to be left in the middle of the woods to try to come back instead of getting Jordan Peterson?
Last Podcast On The Left
Strange Customs: An Interview with Sasha Sagan
I am. My little soul can't handle it. But this is somebody I really like. We're so excited to have the author of For Small Creatures Such As We. and the host of the podcast, Strange Customs. I'm really excited because it's really cool. This is one of those things, it's a part of the world I'm super fascinated about. Like, why do we do what we do?
Last Podcast On The Left
Strange Customs: An Interview with Sasha Sagan
Especially with kids. It's hard. It's hard to be like, we don't celebrate Christmas.
Last Podcast On The Left
Strange Customs: An Interview with Sasha Sagan
Hard for them at school, too.
Last Podcast On The Left
Strange Customs: An Interview with Sasha Sagan
So you don't do the extended Santa lie.
Last Podcast On The Left
Strange Customs: An Interview with Sasha Sagan
But they're straight from Jesus Christ.
Last Podcast On The Left
Strange Customs: An Interview with Sasha Sagan
No middleman. Straight from God.
Last Podcast On The Left
Strange Customs: An Interview with Sasha Sagan
But I also love the lie, though. There's a part of me that wants to continue the lie. I love the idea of going in and... Fuck that! I bought the gifts!
Last Podcast On The Left
Strange Customs: An Interview with Sasha Sagan
We have author, creative mind, podcast host, Sasha Sagan.
Last Podcast On The Left
Strange Customs: An Interview with Sasha Sagan
Miss Saginaw, we're actually going to have to ask you to please stop disseminating the power of pure information to the children.
Last Podcast On The Left
Strange Customs: An Interview with Sasha Sagan
Why is the tooth fairy fine? It feels like the tooth fairy is even more ubiquitous than Santa.
Revisionist History
Memorial Day, 2020 | Part 2
I mean, even you mentioned George Floyd. In Chicago, we had the Laquan McDonald scandal. shooting where he was murdered 16 times. He was shot by the cops. And those cops were in the top 6% of the police force. They've been involved in payouts from the city for misconduct and use of force and tens of millions of dollars before the shooting.
Revisionist History
Memorial Day, 2020 | Part 2
So if you had gotten rid of this small percentage or done something different besides shuffle them around, not only would you have saved lives, you would have saved tens of millions of dollars. You would have saved all of the trauma associated with Laquan McDonald's shooting, the unrest in the city, how it layered into these things.
Revisionist History
Memorial Day, 2020 | Part 2
There are a bunch of studies, ours included, that show my bad behavior as a police officer is actually affected by the bad behavior of my partners. So over time, I'm going to look more like you.
Revisionist History
Memorial Day, 2020 | Part 2
Do you remember the day that you decide to go on the take, so to speak? Yeah.