Your Mom's House with Christina P. and Tom Segura
The Most Consistent Cool Guy w/ Jim Norton | Your Mom's House Ep. 795
Wed, 29 Jan 2025
Get tickets for Tom’s Come Together Tour at https://tomsegura.com/tour SPONSORS: Go to https://zbiotics.com/YMH and use YMH at checkout for 15% off any first time orders of ZBiotics probiotics. Protect your online privacy TODAY by visiting https://ExpressVPN.com/ymh Get 20% off your first order of Liquid I.V. when you go to https://www.liquid-iv.com/ and use code YMH at checkout. It’s another episode of YMH with Tom Segura and Christina P! This week, Mama and Papa Jeans open the show with a new clip from Unc Shine once again looking to get all up in ya. They next discuss poop protocols and cool guy consistencies, before they recap the unhinged insanity of last week's Charo visit. They also check out a very cool tattoo submitted from a fan and check out some clips before being joined by the Uncle Fester of comedy, Jim Norton. Jim Norton is currently navigating the podcast scene after just recently departing from SiriusXM. He joins the Main Mommies and they discuss the intricacies of being a "we", his marriage to a trans woman, the future of human sexuality, the unforgettable Patrice O'Neal, the genius of Greg Giraldo, and the clever tweets of Colin Quinn. They also talk about the evolution of cancel culture and if it truly is on it's way out, before Tom shows Jim some clips that are truly horrible or hilarious! Your Mom’s House Ep. 795 https://tomsegura.com/tour https://christinap.com/ https://store.ymhstudios.com https://www.reddit.com/r/yourmomshousepodcast Chapter Markers 00:00:00 - Intro 00:03:34 - Opening Clip: Unc Shine Wants Those Nips 00:05:26 - What's Your Protocol? 00:08:13 - Unc Shine Is Consistent 00:13:41 - RPC 00:16:29 - Recapping Charo's Visit 00:19:40 - The Choke But In Tattoo Form 00:22:37 - Clip: Kevin Samuels 00:26:02 - Jim Norton Can't Save You 00:31:38 - The Royal "We" 00:37:04 - Married To A Trans Woman 00:41:41 - The Future Of Human Sexuality? 00:45:12 - Closers, Touring, & Podcasting 00:48:44 - Cancel Culture 00:54:07 - Jim Norton’s Crew Of Comedy Greats 00:57:00 - Vandalism Is Funny 01:02:52 - Brendan Walsh 01:07:45 - Colin Quinn & Dave Attell 01:11:56 - The Best Of The Best 01:17:47 - Classic Comedies 01:22:15 - Horrible Or Hilarious 01:29:30 - Closing Song - "Gay Questions" by MC FluidBond & DJ GlassGender Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Chapter 1: What funny moments do Tom and Christina open with?
Battle Creek, Michigan. I am coming to the Fire Keepers Casino on Friday, May 9th. Tickets go on pre-sale next week on Thursday, February 6th at 10 a.m. Eastern with the code TOMMY, T-O-M-M-Y. Later this week, Savannah, Georgia and North Charleston, South Carolina. Tickets and info is at tomseguro.com slash tour.
Welcome, welcome to your
What's everybody? It's time for another podcast. We have a very exciting episode today. Jean, how are you feeling?
I'm excited. There's going to be a snowstorm tomorrow.
I'm taking huge dumps today.
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Chapter 2: What are the poop protocols discussed?
You did.
I had like waves of caca come out and I feel more ready. Isn't that crazy?
When it's a surprise like that, when you sit down to make brown and then you get a bonus brown.
Oh, it was just like... Yeah.
Yeah.
I feel like I took something to make it. I didn't take a laxative.
Are you eating that bran?
No. I took that. I tried that. Sean had told me, oh, try this all bran. And he measures it out like a lunatic. He's like, take exactly 17 grams or whatever. I'm like, whatever. I made a small bowl of it, and I was like, oh, my God.
Because I've been eating that. I sprinkle it on my yogurt, and boy, does that make me...
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Chapter 3: What happened during Charo's visit?
Well, I had the flushing and the rinsing going the whole time. I was rinsing. And what I love about the washlet, the built-in bidets of modern society, is that you can wash as you shit, and then sometimes you keep shitting through the wash. Whoa. What? The spray will hit your asshole. What? And your asshole goes, what's that? And then you just keep shitting.
Hold on, because I've often used the spray to stimulate my anal.
That's what I'm saying.
But then I'd stop the spray once the brown comes down.
Oh, I'll shit right through it. What? Yeah, yeah.
You're crazy. Who does that? Yeah. Why would you do that? Aren't you afraid you're going to cut it off or it'll spook it?
No, no.
I think it's too much stimulation for me, and I cut it off.
It feels kinky. I like it. I like it. This is like, man. Anyway, I just feel like I could shit at any moment again. I really do. Seriously? Yeah, yeah.
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Chapter 4: Who is Jim Norton and what are his latest projects?
I mean, I traveled. Who knows? Yeah. I ate right before we left. I had salmon and rice, which is fine, but you never know.
You never know.
You never know. It'll take a few days to adjust and then I'll leave again and then I'll shit crazy again.
I know. I know. It's weird. I had a little irritation in my bowel too where something triggered it and I was just making soft browns for days. You know when something like irritates your intestines?
Yeah.
But it's kind of nice because then you're cleaning house.
Yeah.
It's cool.
That's pretty cool. You ready to start the show? Yeah, of course. Let's do this real quick. Here we go, everybody.
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Chapter 5: How does Jim discuss his marriage to a trans woman?
I'm looking at you, boy. I'm coming. Okay. Well, you got to bring it to me. You got to bring it to me. Yeah, you got to bring me them nipples. Who is Randy? Don't bring anyone loving to this. Welcome to your mom's house with Tom Segura.
Tom, I have to say this before we get along. I mean, I'd like to change the topic to something a little more dignified. I don't understand why it's so funny to you. What's so funny? You got to bring me them nipples. Oh, my God.
Okay. Okay.
You're the worst.
Okay.
I was going to say that I noticed over Christmas vacation a while ago.
Yeah.
that I have a specific protocol as I'm browning, meaning I can't read a book and brown. It's too distracting. I can't look at just videos and brown. I can't be texting and browning. I have to be playing Tetris. And if I'm not... Wow.
Isn't that crazy? That's fascinating.
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Chapter 6: What insights does Jim share about cancel culture?
We know that. Especially, it's weird when we're alone with our kids, you seem to disappear for like an hour.
Oh, stop.
Yeah, especially when they were young. That was really weird.
Exaggerator.
Legs are... Gross exaggerator. Yeah. Anyway, buy my Perfect Four lipsticks, you guys. I'm wearing the Perfect Red right now. I suggest you just buy all four. Why not? They're the perfect colors. I got Madison, Berlin, Perfect Red, and Atomic at ChristinaP.com.
They're beautiful. They're so beautiful. They are. They're very nice.
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Chapter 7: What are the comedic influences discussed by Jim?
More coming. I'm just so pumped. I love doing these.
You don't think I want them nipples?
God damn it. I thought we were past it. I tried to get us past it. Hold on. What's your protocol? Your protocol?
Um, I just want a little bit of alone. I want a little, just don't bother me.
Sure.
Um, I could do, I mean, as a kid I did magazines a lot, so I like magazines, but we don't have magazines in there anymore. We used to. No. Um, yeah, your phone and just, just.
What are you looking at? Like I found that even specific content I won't brown to.
I don't think that happens to me because I'll read articles. I have New York Times, LA Times, Wall Street Journal. I'll read articles.
That's funny because when I walk by the toilet, I don't hear silence.
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Chapter 8: What tattoo did a fan create for Tom and Christina?
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It's way better.
Fun men to meet. Like, yeah.
No, he's amazing.
Yeah, he does. This is a totally different thing. I mean, look at those birds. It's fucking amazing.
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