Wait Wait... Don't Tell Me!
HTDE: The Perfect Christmas Present with James Patterson and Gillian Flynn
Wed, 11 Dec 2024
On today's episode, Charlie needs help writing a children's book for his wife. So, Mike and Ian call up some of the greatest minds in modern literature, Gillian Flynn and James Patterson. Plus, a slippery way to stay warm on your run and a cool trick to avoid saying "you guys".You can email your burning questions to [email protected]. How To Do Everything won't live in this feed forever. If you like what you hear, scoot on over to their very own feed and give them a follow.Both How To Do Everything and Wait, Wait...Don't Tell Me! are available without sponsor messages for supporters of Wait Wait Don't Tell Me+, who also get bonus episodes of Wait Wait...Don't Tell Me! featuring exclusive games, behind-the-scenes content, and more. Sign up and support NPR at plus.npr.org.How To Do Everything is hosted by Mike Danforth and Ian Chillag. It is produced by Heena Srivastava. Technical direction from Lorna White.Learn more about sponsor message choices: podcastchoices.com/adchoicesNPR Privacy Policy
Chapter 1: What do Mike and Ian need help with?
This is Ira Glass, the host of This American Life. So much is changing so rapidly right now with President Trump in office. It feels good to pause for a moment sometimes and look around at what's what.
To try and do that, we've been finding these incredible stories about right now that are funny and have feeling and you get to see people everywhere making sense of this new America that we find ourselves in. This American Life, wherever you get your podcasts.
Hey there, WaitWait listeners, it's Peter. We have a new episode of How to Do Everything hosted by our very own Mike Danforth and Ian Chilock. Today, Mike and Ian recruit some of the biggest names in literature to help a listener with the perfect Christmas present for his wife. Oh, the things we do for love. If you like what you hear on that show, make sure to follow them at their very own feed.
But in the meantime, enjoy the latest How to Do Everything.
It's December, and it's cold, which leads to the question, how do you stay warm? Burn something. Ed Eyestone just coached the BYU cross-country team to a national championship in freezing cold temperatures, and he has a tip. Yeah, we have a little bit of a hack.
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Chapter 2: What is a unique way to stay warm during runs?
Prior to the start of the race, there's that five minutes where you will strip down, take those sweats off, and you're just standing there shivering in your short shorts and your singlet. So the little hack that we found, and it's very old school— our trainers and coaches will just coat the runner's arms, exposed shoulders and legs with a thin little layer of olive oil.
And that tends to give them a little buffer from the cold and And particularly if it's a windy day and if the temperatures are, you know, freezing, it just kind of bridges that gap until the gun finally sounds and then they are on their way.
And is this like a special sports performance olive oil or is this just go to the grocery store?
Yeah, you know, it's just whatever's on sale that day, that particular day or whatever our trainer comes back with, you know. And, uh, it's interesting though, because, uh, I've been contacted from a olive oil company out of New York. I won't give you the brand name because we haven't, uh, inked the deal yet, but they, they want to be our sponsors. So kind of funny.
If I were to, if I were to go back and watch, uh, this race, the footage, would I say, you know what? BYU looks shinier than all the other runners on the start line. Yeah.
Well, I don't know that that would have been that dramatic. I think more than anything, it's interesting because I've got a couple of mechanical engineering majors in my program that actually ran. One was in particular, they said because of the viscosity of the oil, it can kind of trap a thin layer of air between your skin and the oil itself. So it's kind of multiple layers there.
And that provides some insulation from the convection that you would normally have from the cold air.
Wait, so Ed, did any of the other teams that were competing say anything? Did they notice and react?
No, and I don't think it's really that unique. I think the older coaches had probably seen it done before, and many of them, if they were runners in a previous life, had actually experienced it. I was a runner before going into this coaching gig, and I actually won the NCAA championship back in 1984, so I think that was a 40-year anniversary.
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Chapter 3: How can Charlie write a great ending for his children's book?
With that setup, the zombies, it really is deus ex machina. It's a real twist.
That's true. Okay, so Bella, she's an umbrella. She likes the rain. Her family doesn't. They go on vacation.
And is her family also umbrellas, or is it a human family she lives with?
Great question. So when I'm writing it out, it's literally just an umbrella with a human family, but you don't see the humans. I don't think the humans know. I clearly have not thought that through.
Well, no, our job, Charlie, is not to poke holes in the story. Our job is to help you land the plane. And we're here to do that. Yeah. OK, I think, Charlie, I think we can help you. What we're going to do here is we're going to go to two of the best selling authors of all time. First up, a writer who's written some incredible endings, incredible twists. Gillian Flynn.
Gillian is the author of Gone Girl, Sharp Objects, Dark Places. So Gillian, you have the story. You've got this umbrella, this family that doesn't want to go outside. Where does this take you? Okay.
they don't like going outside as like they're agoraphobic or they just don't like yeah i don't know if it's a pathology but they they definitely just wants to be outside they don't just wanted to check for for plot purposes and he sort of doesn't know where to begin do you do you begin with an ending or do you begin with something you know where where does it start for you
I never, ever begin with an ending. I never know what the ending is going to be. And personally, I think that's the best way to write. So I think he's on to something right there. I think you start with who your character is. Like, you know, I write character based books that happen to be mysteries. But I think the initial conflict is beautiful. And it's there, which is Bella and Umbrella.
obviously needs to get outside. I mean, that's only to her nature. It's almost cruel to keep an umbrella inside for too long.
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Chapter 4: What advice does Gillian Flynn give about writing endings?
I think I would, you know, go with your idea of she's being sort of kept prisoner. And here's this family resisting and actually rejecting who she is innately. I mean, that's a horrifying thing that you're trapped with people who really dislike who you are inherently as a person. Umbrella. Sorry, I'm from Kansas City. I say umbrella. Umbrella.
Yeah, you really do.
Umbrellas. And, you know, does Bella, you know, what do you think? Does Bella start getting a little angry as she's got that pointy end that most umbrellas do? I mean, I don't want to end with something too dark, but... She could really hold them by umbrella point and force them to take her outside.
Also, I'm sure Bella is aware that opening an umbrella inside is terrible luck for the humans. I love that. She could curse them by just opening herself.
Oh, they have a series of really unlucky and unfortunate events, and they can't figure out why it is. And then suddenly they realize they see this umbrella that they've previously neglected in the corner mysteriously opened. I love that.
That's fun.
Not entirely holiday spirit. Yeah.
No, I feel like we've lost it completely at this point. Oh, I like it, though.
I mean, I really do like the idea of her hopping up the stairs one night, her unsuspecting family, flapping umbrella arms. She's like a furious bat. And she just takes them by points them, you know, at right at the throat, her little pointed umbrella and says, take me out of here. You're getting me out of here. And, and out they go.
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Chapter 5: What creative story ideas does James Patterson suggest?
That's incredible, James.
All right. That's what we do. That's what we do here in the little workshop.
My goodness. I understand how you have written more than 200 novels.
Yeah, I could write another 100 about Bella. We could probably do this about Bella. Every week we could come on and tell another Bella story.
Chapter 6: How does the story of Bella the Umbrella evolve?
You think we have a series here?
Yeah, Deadpool, I want to do that one. It's a tsunami, big one, blizzard, big, unexpected.
So maybe we should, well, Charlie now has so many rich ideas.
All right, well, good for Charlie.
Would you ever, like you've worked with some incredible people. You've co-authored books with Dolly Parton and Bill Clinton. You're working on one with Viola Davis?
Yeah, which is great. I love working with her.
How does that process work?
Just like this. I just do all the work, and they take credit on the cover. No. It varies with whoever I'm writing with.
Would you, do you ever work with, so like Charlie is working on this book.
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