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Chapter 1: Who are the main hosts of the podcast?
That's a small colony. I never get invited to those parties, do you? I did get invited, but I couldn't make it. Can I be 102?
No, it's okay.
Imagine being 102. A woman films aftermath of sleeping with 101 men in just 14 hours. Wow. You gotta be exhausted. Yeah. You gotta be exhausted.
Would you rather be 102 or 1?
How much would I have to pay you to sleep in that bed when it's done with 101 guys? I mean, honestly, for one night, would you sleep in that bed? Wenn ich in der Sache war, ja.
Nein, nein, nein. Ich werde nicht da schlafen, wenn ich nicht da war. Sie sagen, du bist nicht Teil davon. Wie lustig, aber. Und dann bin ich so, ja.
Das ist eine gute Fantasie-Football-Punsch. Du verlierst in deiner Fantasie-Liga. Du musst schlafen in der Bettung von 101 Jungs. Zoom ein bisschen. Das ist schrecklich. Wer ist das Orgie?
Blue Chew.
Yes, you are. She's actually very hot. I'm blue-chewing it. She's pretty hot. But you know what's so crazy about this? You just called me out a week ago about this, about being a clean freak. You know me. I'd be waiting in line for the gangbang, cleaning up after everybody. Oh, I know. Guys, please don't leave all this stuff. Especially if it's at your house? Oh, please. Oh, my God.
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Chapter 2: What shocking statistic about relationships is discussed?
Chapter 3: What is the outrageous claim about a viral TikTok video?
Es ist ein schlechtes Neg.
Ja. Es ist wie ein schlechtes Flirten. Es ist ein scheiß Flirten. Also sitze ich in der Audienz, watching Andrew performen. Und es war eine ziemlich attraktive Frau neben mir. Und während eines deiner Jokes sind Leute lachen. Und sie kommt zu mir und sagt, dein Freund ist heiß. Und weißt du, was ich tat? Ich habe gesagt,
It was just an instinctual, like... Was this a girl that you were with or just a random girl? Some random girl, but I just wanted, like, if I could spit out poison. Yeah, you would. You know what I mean? Blind her. I had a rattle, dude. I went out. Right in her neck.
You know what I mean? Like a scorpion. Right in the neck, dude. You're very buff, D2N. Oh, fuck off!
I love you, Ruud. You know what? Let me say this. Oh, here we go. I'll say this. I love our fans more than anything. I thank them graciously. It means the world to me. People may think that I'm like shut down or cold, but if you know me, you know I'm not. I just have a demeanor that has so much trauma. and damage that I just feel a little blank sometimes. So people don't know.
I would love to say hi and smile at you, but when I walk around town, maybe I look a little... And that's because I'm a broken, shattered dude.
Backstage, too, I like to observe other people that aren't familiar with comics and stuff. And they get a little nervous around you.
Only because I'm so kind of stuck.
I know, but I see people going... You know what I mean? It's like, what's going on?
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Chapter 4: How does the conversation shift to gang bangs?
Sie will einen Kuck-König, nicht wahr? Ja. Ja. Black and White Fountains. Erinnerst du dich an die Zeit, wenn es ein weißer Fountain war, konntest du es nicht trinken. Was meinst du? Oh, du meinst die Segregation. In den 60ern. Ja, Segregation. Segregation. Ja, ja, ja.
Guck dir das an. Ich meine, die Farbe ist besser. Ja. Nein, das ist nicht so. Nein, das weiße ist, wenn du deinen Pinsel in der Mitte drückst. Ja, ja. Aber stell dir vor... Das ist so schrecklich. Das ist ein Teil unserer fucking Geschichte. Die Geschichte, Alter. Sie würden nicht Wasser mit Blacken teilen. Das ist so fucking verrückt.
Das ist so verrückt.
Das ist verrückter Scheiß.
Oder wenn sie nicht mal sitzen konnten, wie bei einem Restaurant, wie bei einer Diner-Tafel. Oder sie hatten ihre eigene Seite. Sie würden nicht mal rein gehen. Einige, ja, natürlich. Wie einige der Jazz-Dokumentare. Wir gehen nicht zurück. Ja, ja. Please don't go back there.
I have some historical context here.
Some of these jazz bands would go into a town, play a hotel, but they couldn't stay there. I know, right. Did I say this already? What would happen is... You know, Count Bassey or whatever would go with his band, right? They couldn't stay there, but their wives would go into the black neighborhood while they're on stage and ask the residents, the bands in town, can they stay?
So then they would coordinate like, yeah, yeah, Little Slim, you know what I mean? And Jackie Eyes can sleep here, you know what I mean? And Frankie the Midget, you know what I mean? Trombone Tony can sleep here, you know what I mean? And they would all... You know Trombone Tony. I love him. He's so good. He's got little toes. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Little toes, Trombone Tony. And squeaky peak.
Squeaky peak and whatever. And then after the show, the wives would come back and go, we got you a place to stay. That's insane. Yeah, that was a reality.
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Chapter 5: What anecdote does Bobby share about an audition?
Rühre es tief in den Rücken. Ich weiß nicht, ob ich es brauche.
Ich brauche eine Massage dafür. Es ist nur eine tiefe Haut.
Es hat nichts mit Muskeln zu tun. Diese Haut ist nie auf deinem Rücken ausgeschlossen. Du musst nicht auf deinem Rücken ausgeschlossen sein. Ich mache den Lufa-Stick. Ich mache Sand-Angels. Ja, ja. Ja.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Ja.
Okay, das ist viel. Das ist viel. Ja, ja. Und dann bin ich am Ende mit der oberen Hälfte, mit Gesicht und Haar. Ja, Jules, Jules.
Ich mache nur Haar, Shampoo, Konditioner, und dann Körper, und dann Gesicht, und dann brusche ich meine Zähne, und dann ist das alles.
Oh, eigentlich, weißt du was? Ich habe verletzt. Das erste, was ich tue, ist, meine Zähne in den Schauer zu bruschen. Brust du deine Zähne in den Schauer?
Ja.
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