Sean
Appearances
All-In with Chamath, Jason, Sacks & Friedberg
Markets turn Trump, Long rates spike, Election home stretch, Influencer mania, Saving Starbucks
My wife. My chef.
All-In with Chamath, Jason, Sacks & Friedberg
Markets turn Trump, Long rates spike, Election home stretch, Influencer mania, Saving Starbucks
Yeah, Sean.
All-In with Chamath, Jason, Sacks & Friedberg
Markets turn Trump, Long rates spike, Election home stretch, Influencer mania, Saving Starbucks
Please take off my sweater. Oh my God, this is so brutal.
All-In with Chamath, Jason, Sacks & Friedberg
Markets turn Trump, Long rates spike, Election home stretch, Influencer mania, Saving Starbucks
Well played.
All-In with Chamath, Jason, Sacks & Friedberg
Markets turn Trump, Long rates spike, Election home stretch, Influencer mania, Saving Starbucks
I mean, when are you going to drink it?
All-In with Chamath, Jason, Sacks & Friedberg
Markets turn Trump, Long rates spike, Election home stretch, Influencer mania, Saving Starbucks
You're on fire.
All-In with Chamath, Jason, Sacks & Friedberg
Markets turn Trump, Long rates spike, Election home stretch, Influencer mania, Saving Starbucks
You're going to have to have the fifth best guy here.
All-In with Chamath, Jason, Sacks & Friedberg
Markets turn Trump, Long rates spike, Election home stretch, Influencer mania, Saving Starbucks
I knew that was coming.
All-In with Chamath, Jason, Sacks & Friedberg
Markets turn Trump, Long rates spike, Election home stretch, Influencer mania, Saving Starbucks
You don't want to be at what's called a party. Everybody in the world wants to do something except sex.
All-In with Chamath, Jason, Sacks & Friedberg
Markets turn Trump, Long rates spike, Election home stretch, Influencer mania, Saving Starbucks
Pandemic. He celebrates the pandemic for six months every year. Part of his new ritual to not see anybody for six months.
All-In with Chamath, Jason, Sacks & Friedberg
Markets turn Trump, Long rates spike, Election home stretch, Influencer mania, Saving Starbucks
Have you put your order in? J. Cal, what did you put your order in at?
All-In with Chamath, Jason, Sacks & Friedberg
Markets turn Trump, Long rates spike, Election home stretch, Influencer mania, Saving Starbucks
Oh, sweetheart.
All-In with Chamath, Jason, Sacks & Friedberg
Markets turn Trump, Long rates spike, Election home stretch, Influencer mania, Saving Starbucks
She's like, you speak to me so much more kindly than Chamath does.
All-In with Chamath, Jason, Sacks & Friedberg
Markets turn Trump, Long rates spike, Election home stretch, Influencer mania, Saving Starbucks
I'm the world's greatest house guest. He's put together his own gift bag. Love you, besties. Love you, boys. Bye-bye. Bye-bye.
Armchair Expert with Dax Shepard
Armchair Anonymous: Holiday Nightmare II
In my defense, they were in green garbage bags.
Armchair Expert with Dax Shepard
Armchair Anonymous: Holiday Nightmare II
I tell you what, I'm doing okay. Thank you. You want to know something so bizarre? Yeah. I have that painting of the Great Dane. You do not.
Armchair Expert with Dax Shepard
Armchair Anonymous: Holiday Nightmare II
You have that exact one? The exact same one. No. How did you discover yours? My mom. Oh. Wow. I had a house for a long time with nothing on the walls and she's like, here's a great Dane. And it's the exact same one.
Armchair Expert with Dax Shepard
Armchair Anonymous: Holiday Nightmare II
Well, it is. I would probably get some stock in it if I could.
Armchair Expert with Dax Shepard
Armchair Anonymous: Holiday Nightmare II
Just outside of Phoenix, but I'm originally from Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania.
Armchair Expert with Dax Shepard
Armchair Anonymous: Holiday Nightmare II
Yeah, very much. I think we did a little bit better in the Rust Belt, but hey, what can you do?
Armchair Expert with Dax Shepard
Armchair Anonymous: Holiday Nightmare II
This is a long time ago, 89 to 91. Not even sure if I remember. But on New Year's Day, there's the Polar Bear Club. And my friend, Billy, had a house with an in-ground pool. So he had a party every year, as you can see.
Armchair Expert with Dax Shepard
Armchair Anonymous: Holiday Nightmare II
So we hop in, swim to the wall and back and out. Oh, God. A bunch of us did this and kept going back inside, drinking a lot of tequila, a lot of Sierra Nevada pale ale in a keg back then, which was like unheard of. especially in Pittsburgh. That's an expensive K. We had to special order it in. But anyway, got his fireplace going. We're having a great time. We decide, hey, let's go do it again.
Armchair Expert with Dax Shepard
Armchair Anonymous: Holiday Nightmare II
Hop back in. We're having a blast. We come back in, drink more tequila, throw more firewood in the fireplace. Then the next thing you know, there's smoke pouring into the house.
Armchair Expert with Dax Shepard
Armchair Anonymous: Holiday Nightmare II
We don't know what is going on, but there's about 12 people
Armchair Expert with Dax Shepard
Armchair Anonymous: Holiday Nightmare II
drunk guys i mean really a mess obliterated drinking this much tequila and beer have no clue what is happening so anyway we end up trying to get people out of the house and of course you know i'm bulletproof at 22 years old so i pull the attic open figure that's got to be where the fire is okay so i peek up in there and then the whole roof just starts to go emblazoned
Armchair Expert with Dax Shepard
Armchair Anonymous: Holiday Nightmare II
Oh, okay. So we get everybody out of the house. You know, other than the house burning, everything seems to be okay. But it doesn't stop there. My friend, Billy, whose house it is. Now, back then, he had a Nissan Pathfinder. So Billy said to me, please move my Nissan Pathfinder. So sure, I go out there, put the key in the lock, and it snaps off.
Armchair Expert with Dax Shepard
Armchair Anonymous: Holiday Nightmare II
So not only did his house burn down, but the pathfinder melted along with the house. Oh, my God.
Armchair Expert with Dax Shepard
Armchair Anonymous: Holiday Nightmare II
Well, yeah, we put too much wood in, but he barely ever used his fireplace and there were cracks in the flue up top. So the sparks were going up. And going out through the... Oh. Attic. Yeah.
Armchair Expert with Dax Shepard
Armchair Anonymous: Holiday Nightmare II
All the fire trucks show up. Everybody's outside. I see the fire chief's Suburban, and I just crawled into the back seat and took a nap. Oh, went straight to sleep. I am done. Wow. Wow. So the last thing I remembered... was the fire chief waking me up saying, hey, you can go back in the house. All that was left was the two brick walls on the side. Oh, jeez. Oh, fuck. It burnt all the way down.
Armchair Expert with Dax Shepard
Armchair Anonymous: Holiday Nightmare II
All the way down. Oh. He did rebuild. Every year after that, he had the burn the mother to the ground party. Oh. Oh my God, this guy, is he alive still? No, you know what? Sadly, he passed away from alcoholism addiction. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Years ago. Yeah.
Armchair Expert with Dax Shepard
Armchair Anonymous: Holiday Nightmare II
I'm very moderate. You know, I like a beer now and then, a glass of wine now and then, but that's it.
Armchair Expert with Dax Shepard
Armchair Anonymous: Holiday Nightmare II
Oh God, yeah. It was just incredible. When I saw that you guys wanted stories about winter holidays... I figured. She can't even look.
Armchair Expert with Dax Shepard
Armchair Anonymous: Holiday Nightmare II
Yeah, you've lost all material items. You've literally lost everything. Yeah. It does suck, though. I have a son. He's an addict. He's in recovery over in Oceanside right now. He's doing great, though. He's doing the steps. I think he went through step eight, finished up this weekend. Oh, awesome. So very proud of him doing that. Yeah. Yeah. Good for him. Yeah.
Armchair Expert with Dax Shepard
Armchair Anonymous: Holiday Nightmare II
But I found out about you guys through Bridget and Crystal, two beautiful souls that are in my life. They say hello and they love you. Oh, wonderful.
Armchair Expert with Dax Shepard
Armchair Anonymous: Holiday Nightmare II
No doubt about it. I appreciate you guys. Happy holidays to you.
Armchair Expert with Dax Shepard
Armchair Anonymous: Meet Cute II
And are you still in Cincy? For the past three years, we were actually living in Seattle. I was finishing up my doctorate work at University of Washington.
Armchair Expert with Dax Shepard
Armchair Anonymous: Meet Cute II
Yes. Just this past year, we moved to Wichita, Kansas. Got a job up in central Kansas up there in Bethany College. Shout out. So yeah, we've been bouncing around a little bit. We're loving it.
Armchair Expert with Dax Shepard
Armchair Anonymous: Meet Cute II
Oh, how exciting. You guys are so cute.
Armchair Expert with Dax Shepard
Armchair Anonymous: Meet Cute II
We are. We're vacationing in Colorado Springs, actually, and building a fort at your Airbnb. Talking to Dax and Monica was not on our vacation bingo cards, but we love it.
Armchair Expert with Dax Shepard
Armchair Anonymous: Meet Cute II
Just a little bit, but they bounced right back up.
Armchair Expert with Dax Shepard
Armchair Anonymous: Meet Cute II
I agree with that. And just as a side note, my mom also works at King's Island. Even another layer on top.
Armchair Expert with Dax Shepard
Armchair Anonymous: Meet Cute II
My main instrument was trumpets. I still play. Shout out to the marching band folks. It does happen. Yeah. But I actually teach college music now.
Armchair Expert with Dax Shepard
Armchair Anonymous: Meet Cute II
She was. We both saw each other's and everything was all mixed up except for the number one spot. So both her and I, we saw Megan and Sean.
Armchair Expert with Dax Shepard
Armchair Anonymous: Meet Cute II
Well, I was talking to some folks, same question, like, do you guys know this Megan? Like, oh, wait, you matched with her too? Let me talk to her and we're going to set something up. It was a lot at once. It was a very big day.
Armchair Expert with Dax Shepard
Armchair Anonymous: Meet Cute II
Right. You're looking for a first kiss. Within that meeting, all of our friends were just surrounding us.
Armchair Expert with Dax Shepard
Armchair Anonymous: Meet Cute II
Together, in total, 15 years, been married for eight. Needless to say, best five bucks ever spent.
Ask Dr. Drew
The Deep State Media Is Still Lyin’ For Biden w/ Comedian Chrissie Mayr & Author Michael Walsh – Ask Dr. Drew – Ep 485
Hello, Drew. Thank you for having me on.
Dateline NBC
A Crack in Everything
So the prosecutor says it's a logical inference from the facts of the case that Mr. Jennings, after he shot his wife, before he called 911, he washed his hands and washed his forearms. And blood evidence.
Dateline NBC
A Crack in Everything
The prosecution at trial wanted to show that she was intent on leaving him. And she had an application at an apartment complex where Lacey had lived.
Dateline NBC
A Crack in Everything
The state presented witnesses that said she was in good spirits, and it's unlikely that someone who has cosmetic surgery and is feeling good about themselves would take their lives.
Dateline NBC
A Crack in Everything
It's initially ruled a suicide. Her sister went to the Missouri State Highway Patrol to express their belief that this, in fact, was a murder.
Dateline NBC
A Crack in Everything
The defense attorney in his closing argument said they had that thing for two years. I don't know why they didn't test it for gunshot residue, but they didn't. So we could wrap this up in a heartbeat, whether he did it or not, if they had tested that.
Dateline NBC
A Crack in Everything
Coming up... She went to the Missouri State Highway Patrol to express their belief that this, in fact, was a murder. And an investigator's prime suspect, Brad Jennings.
Dateline NBC
A Crack in Everything
But Lisa's younger sister, Sean, was talking. She saw a rocky marriage, and her sister would not be a person that would have committed suicide.
Dateline NBC
A Crack in Everything
In early January, she went to the office of the Missouri State Highway Patrol to express their belief that this, in fact, was a murder. She looked into a highly experienced detective named Dan Nash. Long-time investigator who's been involved in several high-profile murder cases in the Ozarks.
Dateline NBC
A Crack in Everything
He was just struck by the fact that if Lisa Jennings had shot herself using her right hand, that there would be more blowback from that wound than one drop of blood.
Dateline NBC
A Crack in Everything
and wanted the bathrobe that Mr. Jennings was wearing that night.
Dateline NBC
A Crack in Everything
Apparently it had not. Mr. Jennings had spent a little time going back into that bedroom, where from his perspective, his wife had taken her life.
KILL TONY
#699 - LUIS J GOMEZ + JOE LIST
I'm 4% Nigerian. That means I can say the N-word every 50 days or so. I'm married, I do most of my own laundry, I do all the cooking, I do most of the cleaning, and I pay most of the bills. The only reason I'm still married is because of the sex. The wonderful sex I'm having with her sister. I don't want to screw that up. I've got a real... She's not even that hot. I've got a real creepy uncle.
KILL TONY
#699 - LUIS J GOMEZ + JOE LIST
My mom hoped that he wouldn't rub off on me. But he did it anyway. I don't like to text and drive. It makes it way too difficult to watch porn and masturbate. You will never catch me drinking and driving, because I'm that fucking fast.
KILL TONY
#699 - LUIS J GOMEZ + JOE LIST
I heard some of the questions you asked the other guy. The gayest thing I've ever done, I won a skipping contest. Really? Yeah. Like in the fifth grade, I was awesome. I was fast.
KILL TONY
#699 - LUIS J GOMEZ + JOE LIST
No, I'm not. Oh, you made that up. Well, I had to change it from McTickles to Tickles. McTickles. No, that's not you either. My real name's Sean.
KILL TONY
#699 - LUIS J GOMEZ + JOE LIST
You have warrants? No, you know, just don't want people to know me as Tommy Tickles. How many DUIs have you gotten? Ha! Never been caught. I have never been caught. Never. You pled not guilty.
KILL TONY
#699 - LUIS J GOMEZ + JOE LIST
I've seen a lot of shit, yeah. Yeah? What have you seen? Oh, you know, I've been everywhere. I've been all over the world. You know, you see it all. Yeah. I've been on 6th Street. Shit, some lady tried to sell me a scooter for like 50 bucks. That sounds like a pretty good deal, honestly. I know. That's what I said.
KILL TONY
#699 - LUIS J GOMEZ + JOE LIST
I couldn't figure out how to put the gas in the motherfucker, but I've got a scooter now. So you bought it. Yeah. Amazing. I'm from the country. Yeah, where? Outside of Fredericksburg, about two and a half hours from here. Okay. Out in the middle of nowhere. All right.
KILL TONY
#699 - LUIS J GOMEZ + JOE LIST
Yeah, I was raised there. Okay. My dad was in the Navy. I was born on a Corpus Christi Naval base. And then after all that, you know, I ended up out on the farm and ranch out in Fredericksburg.
KILL TONY
#699 - LUIS J GOMEZ + JOE LIST
That's what I'm doing right now. I'm a farmer, rancher, and construction manager. Okay. Yeah.
KILL TONY
#699 - LUIS J GOMEZ + JOE LIST
It's like 16, 20 fucking hours a day milking goats and sheep and fucking cows getting in the neighbor's pasture. And then you do all that during the nighttime, farming, you know, plowing fields and planting oats. And then in the daytime, I go build fence and fucking barns and shit.
KILL TONY
#699 - LUIS J GOMEZ + JOE LIST
Everybody knows that goats wiggle around more and have bigger tits.
KILL TONY
#699 - LUIS J GOMEZ + JOE LIST
I can do a cesarean. I can perform a C-section on a goat or a sheep or cow. That's not very sexual, but I can stick my hand all the way up in there. And you've done that before? Yeah, you got to. If you got big old hands.
KILL TONY
#699 - LUIS J GOMEZ + JOE LIST
I've been married for 13 years. That's right, yep. What does she do for a living? What's his name?
KILL TONY
#699 - LUIS J GOMEZ + JOE LIST
She cleans bed and breakfasts. She's a housekeeper, and then also she takes care of the ranch. I mean, it's a full-time job. We have 12 bottle babies right now, little tiny goats and sheep, and she has to bottle feed them three times a day, so it's busy out there.
KILL TONY
#699 - LUIS J GOMEZ + JOE LIST
No. No, you gotta love it. You know, I love it. You love it. Well, kind of. I'd rather make some money, but... You wake up to, like, what wakes you up? Like chickens or something like that? Chickens and geese, and then we got about 15 guinea hens that live above our house, so it's like a fucking bowling ball.
KILL TONY
#699 - LUIS J GOMEZ + JOE LIST
What are they, guinea what? Hey, wake up down there! Hey! Oh! Oh, fuck. No, it's hard to fall asleep, and it's not hard to wake up.
KILL TONY
#699 - LUIS J GOMEZ + JOE LIST
Free use. Free use? Yeah, you know, you're just wandering around and there's some chick there and she's like, you can do whatever you want.
KILL TONY
#699 - LUIS J GOMEZ + JOE LIST
A hydraulic connection on a hydraulic hose that goes to my skid steer.
KILL TONY
#699 - LUIS J GOMEZ + JOE LIST
You've got extremely big teeth. I bet horses love you. Maybe they don't love you. Maybe they're scared you're going to eat their corn. That is true. Your face should be at the end of a conveyor belt in a James Bond movie. Just like chomp, chomp, chomp, chomp, chomp, chomp. Yeah. These are all very good. Red Van, if I said, right turn, Clyde, would you know what to do?
KILL TONY
#699 - LUIS J GOMEZ + JOE LIST
No, is that barnyard material? No, same generation from a Clint Eastwood movie. He'd go, right turn, Clyde, and some chimpanzee would go, blink, stick out his arm and knock somebody out. Okay. You have that on, like, VHS or something somewhere. Probably.
KILL TONY
#699 - LUIS J GOMEZ + JOE LIST
Yes. And you use it? Oh, yeah. I've got stacks of movies. There's nothing else to do. Absolutely incredible.
KILL TONY
#699 - LUIS J GOMEZ + JOE LIST
Internet, smartphone, fucking smart TV nowadays. Just no moisturizer. Okay.
KILL TONY
#699 - LUIS J GOMEZ + JOE LIST
All right. Oh, my nephew talked me into getting some earbuds. So now I got earbuds on, so I'm out there on the tractor. I can listen to my earbuds.
KILL TONY
#699 - LUIS J GOMEZ + JOE LIST
Can't figure out the phone, though. People call, and I'm slapping myself in the ear. Now I have a fucking earache. Wow, look at that.
KILL TONY
#699 - LUIS J GOMEZ + JOE LIST
50 years old, I've always wanted to do this, love comedy, but I've just been stuck out on the farm and ranch, and then all of a sudden I find out about your show, it's only like two and a half hours away, and I'm like, why the fuck not?
KILL TONY
#699 - LUIS J GOMEZ + JOE LIST
I can't hardly see anybody, so I'm fucking fine. I'm a little nervous, my legs are a little shaky, but I got a few laughs. That's what I wanted, some laughs.
KILL TONY
#694 - SHAWN GARDINI + TOMMY POPE
She needs love, dude. Oh, thank you, Tommy. She just needs a good fucking hug from a WAP. Greasy Dego fucking hug. How'd that feel?
KILL TONY
#694 - SHAWN GARDINI + TOMMY POPE
Just seeing someone so far... You ever been hit by a car? What's this about? You got an excuse for that fucking face? That's crazy.
KILL TONY
#694 - SHAWN GARDINI + TOMMY POPE
Another sad fucking story. Are your parents... Mexican, too? Can we fucking pick it up?
KILL TONY
#694 - SHAWN GARDINI + TOMMY POPE
This is delicious. I've always seen you from afar, Tom. This is very exciting.
KILL TONY
#694 - SHAWN GARDINI + TOMMY POPE
You like that? You guys like that? He asked me upstairs. There's two Italians in this whole fucking city. Me and the lead singer of the fucking band.
KILL TONY
#694 - SHAWN GARDINI + TOMMY POPE
I dropped him in his shopping cart. Fucking pushed him down a hill.
KILL TONY
#694 - SHAWN GARDINI + TOMMY POPE
I'm sorry. I was talking about his outfit. Oh, yeah. Let's talk about it. Looks like you just woke up in a lost and found box.
KILL TONY
#694 - SHAWN GARDINI + TOMMY POPE
Okay, I got a compliment for you. Huh? I got a compliment for you. Okay. How tall are you?
KILL TONY
#694 - SHAWN GARDINI + TOMMY POPE
I wish I was six feet and every inch of me looked like a... Like the hue of a pig's asshole. Hold on!
KILL TONY
#694 - SHAWN GARDINI + TOMMY POPE
I thought we were done. I thought we were done. I was smiling at you. That's a fucking random shot. I don't know why you took a shot at me.
KILL TONY
#694 - SHAWN GARDINI + TOMMY POPE
No, I do. I've seen him before. He's fucking hilarious, but I get anxious, you know? I have this, like, weird, uneasy feeling. It's like watching a dog sneeze. Where you stand up like, oh... Is he okay? He's okay. He's okay. Let him sneeze. Let him get it out.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 541 - NP-Ari (feat. Ari Shaffir)
The dad jacked him off, too. You told me about that. He fucked the whole family. He fucked an entire family.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 541 - NP-Ari (feat. Ari Shaffir)
You just get a buzz at the tailgate from people who fucking next to you.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 541 - NP-Ari (feat. Ari Shaffir)
And just to have people be like, yo, for real, dude, this isn't it, all right? This isn't it, so fuck you. It's so fucking funny. I talk to the dude who did it, and he's like, I'm going to fire up three more right away.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 541 - NP-Ari (feat. Ari Shaffir)
And then it's just about Garfield selling pussy and John being sexually bothered on the streets as he tries to find out what's happening. It's so funny. It's just people trying to force John to do gay stuff with him. To find his lost cat. Every time he brings it up, people are like, I fucked that bitch last week.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 541 - NP-Ari (feat. Ari Shaffir)
Oh, dude. You're thinking what I'm thinking.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 541 - NP-Ari (feat. Ari Shaffir)
That pod squad is like Thomas the Tank Engine.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
Yo! I was ready this morning, man. You should have called me at 6.30. I woke up being like, I'm ready to fucking podcast.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
Yeah, no little, I mean, I wouldn't mind some little cannon fodder.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
The cool thing is, so you get hit, you go out, you can't be hit for six seconds until you come back to, like, your gun makes a noise. So that was like, yeah, if you got hit, you're out. You couldn't get hit again. But there was also these big power-up detonators that, like, if it would be, like, three, two, if you hit it in time, you get, like, your gun would get, like, contra, like, super ammo.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
Or you have, like, an ammo count. It was kind of nuts. But, yeah, there was a lot. You could get, like, there was, like, landmines around you. Like, if they went off near you, you were just, it was pretty sick. Yeah.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
laser tag man it was yeah even better than i remembered and i played i mean i gave it literally my all like i was yeah first game was a learning curve i had to figure out a couple things about gameplay second game i was ripping dude it was fun you have like rank you come out you see like your stat it's dude i mean it's literally called who was number one guard dog you're claiming you were number one i was number two but tootsie roll was number one and he was on my team tootsie roll was red what
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
I believe number one of the first game was Rhett.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
I got like 11th and then eighth. But here's the thing.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
The one thing I don't like, they do kind of reward cowardice in battle.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
yeah i was moving that's just i mean that was that was good but i was storming castles i was going in but i was getting hit a lot and i'm just kidding i'm not fucking with you i'm not playing with you i'm not messing with you you have some cowardice but that's fine no i wasn't you were tactician i i was you know i was tactical i have a question for spider when were these farts happening during the game or where was this that the farts was it in the cake room yeah
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
But he said his music was ass because he was like, I just, it threw off my whole thing. Especially if you're rapping using the N-word and you take it away.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
Yeah, exactly. Although I'm sure laser tag fog doesn't help. That's probably... Probably traps the farts. By carrying the fog. And Guardian, I'm just kidding. You didn't... You weren't playing like a character. You fought bravely and you fought well. I'm just being jealous.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
Oh, my God. Shane Gillis is breaking into the thing. Shane Gillis is smacking a diva. Oh, my God.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
Yeah. That'd be tight. I mean, everyone wants to have McConaughey energy just rub off on them. It was awesome. It's just like looking people in the eye. I'm like, ah.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
But yeah, so then he came back after the shit wasn't working. He goes, I'm going to do it. They're like, no, no, no. I'm going to do it again. He's back on his bullshit.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
I was just having fun Damn after the diva fucking was that after the diva told you I thought I could get him I thought I spent the rest of the night pretending to be angry
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
Yeah. Yeah, dude, they fucking invented wrestling. They invented fake wrestling. It's luchadores. Yeah, luchadores, dude.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
That should be... The WWE should change their slogan to, let's get retarded in here. Like, for real, just like... It's awesome. Just throw off the weights of the world.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
It'd be crazy if you're like, yeah, actually, I'd like to see this in like two weeks.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
Goddamn, dude. That was one reality show when I used to watch reality shows with my ex. That was when I liked the Divas show. Yeah, they were like, I kind of liked that. Usually you watch kind of reality shows like Vanderpump Rules. I'd watch Divas and be like, these seem like good down-to-earth people. These are good Divas. These are good Divas.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
The bros, just pro wrestler boyfriends, just being kind of supportive. Yeah.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
He lives in a castle. I mean, that's got to be crazy in a castle in Kentucky with like a goblet just thinking about the time he said the N-word. I mean, imagine though, because a lot of business heads are like really stoked on cursing. That's like a high level CEO thing. Because they're bad at it. I don't give a fuck.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
Put him in the Undertaker casket for a weekend. See if he comes out and just kind of like trad, straightens out his weird sexual things. They did it the ultimate. It worked on the ultimate warrior. What'd they do? They just put him in the casket and he chilled? You remember they put him in the casket? The Undertaker put the ultimate warrior in a casket. He was never the same.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
Back in like 94, they put the ultimate warrior in the casket for like a weekend. He came out and he was, bro, he was fucked up. That's not good. I remember being little and just being like, holy fuck, dude.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
Something like that. I think they just snagged his ass.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
I gotta go to school tomorrow. He buried him alive?
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
Damn, what about the guy who died? Didn't the guy for real die?
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
But people in the arena were like, oh. Yeah. Did they continue on with it?
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
I mean, you really can't stop it. That would be a vibe crusher.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
Wait, hold on. He got kicked in the neck and he died? No.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
Yeah. Dang, so what happens? What's a mega fan like you do when a wrestler dies in the ring?
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
I didn't mean to say Raven Serial killed that guy but yeah we know what you meant well I didn't know yeah I thought it was just that one guy who died it was a shame more people died how about that and then no one ever talks about all those pussies Vince McMahon fucking straight up killed dude after damn hell yeah yeah it was awesome that was a fun time nice man
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
Dude, hear me out, dude. What if you start a new Fast and Furious franchise, but just take a different vehicle? What are you thinking? Lime scooters. Jailbroke lime scooters. Cruise.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
that's what i'm saying so yeah you gotta think you gotta think of something cool you can like pass underneath like a truck that's all you need is one one cool lane switch to set off the whole 10 movie franchise that was big that was i was done after that i was like yep sign me up for 14 more of these things yep they haven't gone in space yet have they yeah fast and furious is in space they launched uh ludacris and tyrese into outer space in a car i'm not fucking joking dude
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
Did they? I got to ask. Did they ride dirty into outer space? They did. Why'd they launch him into outer space? I have no idea. I didn't see the movie. I just saw that clip. That's got to be... I mean, dude, that's got to feel crazy when you're like your 10th movie in and you're just like... You know it's like a trope and a cliche to like, all right, we got to go to space now.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
And it's being like, it's got to be actually kind of a sweet moment. We're like, dude, we've made literally so much money. We have to go to space.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
We're taking the franchise into space. And you're like, everyone just clings glasses and like, dude, our descendants will never have to work. We've taken a movie franchise into space. Now we have a billion dollars.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
We were at a happy hour when he called our one co-worker. Wow, wow. It was so awesome.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
They also got to miss me with that other stuff, bro.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
I know. Heavy Pauls on the last paragraph. Join me in the fun this Sunday. We're going to have big runs. I like that. Big scores and obviously big buckets of brewskis. Yo. Can't forget the brewskis. What can't you forget? Big buckets of brewskis, bro. Big buckets of brewskis. Big buckets, dude. and hopefully big wins on prize picks. Combine up to six picks.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
Picks are what the Chiefs will be throwing all day to create your lineup and you can win up to 1,000 times your money instantly. Who's writing this? Real players. Who wrote this? Bring me their fucking head. Who wrote this?
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
That happens when you're in an office. You're like in school forever, essentially. Yeah. Like, you can't say bad words. No bad words.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
Real players, real sports, real cash. With over 10 million members and billions paid out in winnings, PrizePix has made daily fantasy sports accessible to all. It's the simplest way to win money in over 30 states, including California, Texas, and Georgia. Download the PrizePix app today and use code DRENCHED to get $50 instantly when you play $5.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
That's code DRENCHED on PrizePix to get $50 instantly when you play $5. Win or lose, you'll get $50 just for playing. Guaranteed. PrizePix. Run your game.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
Oh, I have to do a... Please come to Dania Beach, Florida. That's a big one. Dania Beach, Florida. I'll be there next weekend, I believe. And the Bang Bus guy. And the Bang Bus-er. Oh, yeah, I talked about that.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
Bang Bus-er, don't come get me. The Funny Bone, Columbus, Ohio, February 21st. Comedy Castle, Royal Oaks. The Funny Bone, Omaha, Nebraska. Laugh Out Loud. San Antone, Cobbs Comedy. In Sacramento, California, Seattle, Washington. That's everywhere I'm going to do until May.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
That might have been the first. That was, I think, the first set of tits I saw in an actual movie was Leprechaun in Space. Yeah. Bro, I'd be so mad if I was in Space and there was an evil leprechaun. Was Jennifer Aniston in that? She's in one of them. She might be. She's in a fucking leprechaun, bro. Is she really? Yes. It wasn't her tits, though. Leprechaun was a big movie franchise.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
i'd go no i'm fucking jennifer aniston i'd be leaning into him i was like yeah while you guys thought i was killing my gay chef and smoking crack and doing all that other stuff i was actually plugging aniston so fuck you guys dude for saying that'd be sick i would support him if you had if you were obama and you had to own up to two rumors which would you own up to uh drone striking all those civilians way before i admit to killing my gay chef
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
Mike handled my fucking light work, bro. I watched. I just diddied out and watched.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
I don't like... I don't know why it's acceptable. There's this guy from Denver who like... He's asking questions, and the whole thing is supposed to be like, all right, did you say these things in the past? And then RFK's like, well, like, kind of said that, but let me clarify. And he's like, I don't care what you're saying now. I want to know what you said then.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
It's like, well, why do you care what he said then if you don't care what he said now?
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
I mean, I get it, because it's like, you're just saying that to get into this position. But it was just so lame to be like.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
Yeah, he was like, I don't want to hear that part. You're like, dude, what the fuck?
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
I can't stop watching videos about that white rapper who keeps saying the N-word. He's like, I'm ready to punch on it. He's ready to punch over it. If you even think someone's looking at him sideways, he's like, I'm ready to punch about it. I think that's the only way he's a giant man.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
Does it have a butt flap? Yeah, dude, I that was like really insane, dude. I watched a good amount of it. I didn't watch, I listened to it, but my video was playing while I was driving on the way over here. And I was just like, dude, just let the guy talk, man.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
You can hold his feet to the fire on stuff, but they do that, I hate to say, kind of like girl stuff, where they'd be like, no, no, no, that's what you said, okay. And you're like, oh, hold on, what the fuck? What are we doing here? Oh, that's what you said. No, that's what you said.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
Yeah, and it's also like, what I think a lot of it is, is like, all right, let's just get the clip of us making him seem like he doesn't know what he's talking about, bang, and just go.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
Yeah, I mean, I will say there's like an age. It's like if you commit a crime when you're minor and forgiven.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
But there's a threshold. Into adulthood, if you're video game lying, it's like, bro.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
I always get so scared to sleep at work. I've tried it. I did it in an office. There was one guy who wouldn't come in on a certain day and I would go to his, like, office. It was all, like, dark. There was no lights on. I would just lay in the corner and try to sleep. That fucking rules, though. But I'd be so fucking, like... Oh, yeah. If I get caught. Yeah, I was worried about getting caught.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
Hiring a guy to be like, yo, get nice in this video game.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
See, if it's just for a passion project where you're like, damn, that level's really hard, I'm a billionaire, why am I sweating over this? I'll hire someone to beat this level for me and come back. Just so I can watch the storyline. That would be sick to get briefed. You're a billionaire. So what happened? Briefing on Diablo. Yeah, briefing on Diablo. I was like, that's so sick.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
So he paid to... Mr. Musk, did you use Game Genie?
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
Or just be like, I like to play video games every now and again. You don't have to be a world-ranked player. That's crazy. That is crazy. Although he is. I don't know. Is he the first case of unchecked autism? Pretty much. Have we had autistic billionaires before? We had to have had a couple.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
I feel like you... What an autistic video game liar. That's the fundamental question here. You know what I'm saying? I don't think they lie. I feel like there's a code. Those bros... Especially on the vidges. That's what I'm saying. That'd be like being like, I know I could quote the whole Sonic movie back and forth and being like, bro, bro, you're lying, dude.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
It's like I hired somebody to fucking read me the Sonic lines so I could be autistic. Yeah. I hope that's not true. The thing that's been freaking me out about that kind of stuff is like, and again, I don't know if this is real or not, but like people hiring, like being their own hype man in the comments.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
I've like, I've seen multiple stories about different people doing this where it's like busted. They like bust up the comments, bro.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
That would feel good to like anonymously be like, actually, he's actually pretty fucking sick. I don't know, but he was on laser tech. He was number six. But yeah, people, they like the screenshots again, you know, whether or not it's true or not, you never know. But it's like, there was like a screenshot of them busting up their Twitter account. And then you saw the alt underneath it.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
Sleeping at work, if you can somehow pull it off, I mean, that's the ultimate.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
And it's like, that's the, and then they'll show the top comment and like, yo, this person's
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
Yeah, that's crazy. Or if like you hire someone to do social media, like, you know, while you're at it, set up that other account. How about you say a couple of nice things about me?
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
It's like I'd rather be caught fapping accidentally on Zoom than have somebody catch me hyping myself, dude. That's devastating. Be like, actually, he's like really fucking cool.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
Night shift is like people do sleep. Night shift ruled. It's kind of accepted to sleep on night shift. I liked night shift. Yeah, it's kind of acceptable to be like, dude, I'm going to go fucking take an hour long nap.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
Yes, I could imagine that being a gigantic waste of money.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
You're the DEI instructor. You come back with like hard PTSD. Get out of here, you fucking gay bitch.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
They're the best. It's a shame we can't get along better, man. It'd be so cool to just like... We can get along with Africa. We do, for sure. Yeah, we can chill with those. But I'm saying, we gotta stop fighting. Every other country, so all of our, like, think about our enemies, dude, abroad. China's, you know, like it or hate it. China's hilarious. They're funny as hell, dude.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
Yeah, they're funny as fuck. They're funny as hell.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
That's their, like, remember how the soldiers got, like, peanut butter, German soldiers got peanut butter for the first time in World War II? They're just watching fucking Fail Army, like, holy shit, everything I've ever been told is a fucking lie. This shit is awesome.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
yeah that's gotta be crazy man especially getting tossed into russia and having russians be like oh you didn't know about this shit yeah check this shit out blue jeans check this shit out although tucker was saying russia's chill as hell i watched that one video where he went to a supermarket yeah looked like an aldi's where he was just like this is amazing they have everything here fresh produce
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
yeah they have stuff there although apparently uh you're never gonna believe it russia has stuff russia has stuff or they apparently putin called i think putin is trying to rile up the right wing bros he's like yo actually send falchi over here i'll deal with his ass and everyone's like yeah we'll fuck on twitter like i'll send him over here right now you'd be surprised he's uh it's pretty it is pretty massive they also said the biden administration tried to kill him
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
I'm just watching fucking RFK get in there, and they're like, you think fucking kids... You don't like Pop-Tarts? You don't fucking like Pop-Tarts? Fuck you. All the kids are going to die. It is crazy. He's like, look, it's not working. Health-wise, we're not doing well. They're like, we understand that, but didn't you say that... And it's just like, dude, let it go. You guys had it.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
You guys held down the fort. They held down the fort. You had fucking... Fort sucked. You had the Fouch Man in there. You guys got your... How long was he in there for? Fucking forever. He's in there for fucking ever, dude. It's like, let's fucking roll the dice, man. We're all fat as hell. Let's roll the fucking dice. I got type 2 motherfucking diabetes almost.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
I wouldn't mind switching things up a little bit, dude. Switch it up. Yeah, I was over here like, dude, I'm probably one of the healthiest guys I know.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
This is truth. But yeah, hopefully we come out of it. I think after two more years we might come out. All right. They do got to stop fucking lying and doing Nazi salutes. I just wish. I just wish they'd stop. Video game lying is what you wish. Video game lying, no Nazi saluting.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
Heart goes out to you. That's a gray area up for interpretation. Video game lying is... It's black and white, man. It's cut and dry like... Oh, man, I pray that's not true. You guys looked at it. I need to know. Yeah, he did. It is true. He admitted it.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
Tom Fuller. Yeah. There's like money in those open world games that like becomes almost like real money. Like it becomes like you could, you know, it's like a tradable commodity.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
It is sick to have a storm being like, I got to get a higher fucking Diablo rank.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
Yeah, that is the ultimate. I mean, that's like the click remote of being able to just be like, I'm going to accelerate time. Let me just lose consciousness for a while. Wake up.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
Whatever. At least he owned up to it. At least he's fucking... That's good. Holding it down. That'd be crazy if he held it down Watergate style. I was like, I'll never fucking admit it.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
Yeah, true. I would have been like, we got to invade Vietnam again, actually, just to distract the whole population. Fucking bomb Vietnam.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
Dude, that's like reading a fucking book. Yeah, it was a lot.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
That's a sick move, actually. That does create like a little sanctuary blast zone. I'm just watching this thing about a horrible... Watching Vietnam, you guys are not going to watch it. Yeah. It is like one of those frequencies. It's a scarecrow. It's a scarecrow.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
Yeah, it's tough. It's tough to lay on the floor in business casual and take a nap. Here's something like a sweater vest.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
Yeah, that's fucked up. That's crazy. The book I read, the Born Again book with the guy Chuck Colson, who was like his dude who went to jail for Watergate or one of the guys who went to jail. I remember him claiming like they had these peace talks going. They got like sabotage. But that was before he even got in there.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
Oh, yeah. They don't talk about that. That's pretty bad.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
Yeah, this is not a good idea. The idea was they were under the threat of becoming communists and we were supposed to go in there and be like, hey guys, come on man, don't do that. Then we just started shooting people.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
What was the upside for America, though? I don't know.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
That is a giant psychological victory to be like, yeah, I don't give a fuck.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
yeah but i just don't understand i never i can never understand how it started like world war one was archduke ferdinand they're like oh fuck like i get the beginnings of that i've never there was was there like in like the civil war there was like fort sumter was the first battle i never understood like the first battle where they're like hey oh shit well vietnam didn't have like it did have battles but it was another it was like it was a weird war there wasn't like uh
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
Dude, I had possibly, so I went to laser tag for my birthday. I didn't want to do anything. Brittany asked, like, so what do you want to do? I was just like, dude, I just want to like eat like dinner and just go to sleep. I'm like, kind of, you know, she's like, we're going to do, we're going to do laser tag. And I was like,
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
So you have to just like, you have to like just take out the communist leaders. That's like the military objective.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
That is pretty exciting. I mean, dude, I never really knew. I knew it was like a. Yeah, I never knew anything about Vietnam.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
I mean, it does, you know, I don't know. Yeah, I still, I got a, I did Marty Ben's podcast on Bitcoin. Nice. Yesterday, so I had the same experience.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
I'm a little bit clear. I don't know what it is. It's like one of the greatest technologies man's ever done. I can do that. I can do that. So, dude, he was explaining it yesterday. How do they mine it?
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
So, this is my understanding of it. Somebody tell me. This is my hard-earned, and I don't know if this is even correct, but... So there's like a computer network that is somehow securing Bitcoin by solving this like mathematical equation the founder set out to where like it increases in difficulty. So if like a lot of Bitcoins are being mined, You're mining a Bitcoin.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
You're being rewarded for dedicating computing power that then secures the network itself, which is just this weird mathematical function that can be solved. And then for solving it, you get a little Bitcoin as a reward. But then the network knows the problem's being solved, so it ups the difficulty. And then it tethers back and forth. It was weird as fuck. Yeah, but that doesn't make any sense.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
Yeah, not really. I don't understand it either.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
So it can't be... The big thing is the fiat currency.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
True. The fiat currency is the big port of... Where it's like any currency is... like the policy dictating like the worth of the currency is dictated by a centralized government body. But Bitcoin, the network through which it's exchanged, that is somehow bolstered by like voluntary computer power that is given Bitcoin as a result, as a reward.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
Alright, I actually might be kind of sick dude then I made I I wouldn't I don't know if I'd call it a mistake But I was like I'm gonna get like really stoned and just go to laser tag. That'll be kind of fun, dude So I'd like I said I ate a little edible and they in on the before I went in there I was like smoked a joint in my car.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
allows for it to never be centralized and dictated in a way where like you know if you own if you have all your money in usd and they're printing out tons of us dollars it fucks up your money like your money in a bank is of course literally dissipating if it's not if you're not investing your money's disappearing under inflation like a part of it is just disintegrating yeah and bitcoin's argument is that it won't do that because they're not they're only going to ever put out 21 million bitcoins that's like the whole thing it's just and but i'm like yeah but like
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
So you can just save it. I guess you can just save it and just put it, use it as like a savings account. That was the whole, let me just talk about other stuff, but it was cool to hear about like hash point. I still don't understand that. He's like, well, then it reaches the hash point. The hash point dictates the difficulty level. And it was just like, bro, let me know.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
I hope it goes up to 200, man. That's all I know. Yeah.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
They don't like it, dude. No. They don't like it. Well, because it apparently just totally undermines the way Wall Street functions. I don't know. Again, I'm out of my depth on that, too. But I did get a little bit. Now I understand what mining Bitcoin is. It's like dedicating computers. You have a computer, and it just does math problems, really hard math problems all day.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
And then every now and again, you're like, damn, you just got a fraction of a Bitcoin. You're like, yes. It's Math Castle. It's stupid. It's literally Math Castle. I don't like that. You have Math Castle. You have like a huge rack of computer servers doing Math Castle every now and again. Yeah. Yoshi or whatever his name is. Yoshi is like... You get a Mario coin and you go, yes!
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
The network. The network having its... The network just gets bigger. Yeah. Bigger and more secure. So it's like with the more computing power you have dedicated for some reason to doing these math problems, that way like when an exchange happens, it's somehow validated within the thing. It's like, yep, this definitely happened. It's like a...
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
kind of a worry-free way to exchange money like they're saying you can't scam it from what i've heard i don't know if you can or not so it was pretty cool i got i got bitcoin pill yesterday and i was like damn it's kind of sick i always wanted just to know because i don't know literally anything about it and these dudes are like you seem to have an idea of what bitcoin is
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
I'm like, dude, how hard is this math problem? And how the fuck did a guy... It's 13 times 7.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
Yeah, we got into quantum computing. I was like... That makes no sense, quantum computing. No sense at all. Because quantum mechanics has to deal with the teeniest, tiniest specs of matter possible. And I'm like, okay, I understand that, but how the fuck does you have a computer dealing in that?
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
I guess instead of megabytes, it's minibytes. And you go, oh, shit. It's minibytes. It's just unparalleled computing power. What do you have? They're called qubits. Qubits? They're called what?
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
Dude, the battle was great. What really rocked me was pre-battle administrative stuff with the laser tag employees because I thought Brittany was going to handle all that. We forgot the cake. So I was like, oh, fuck. So she was on the phone trying to get someone to bring the cake to the laser tag place, which I had a kid's party room, which was the fuck. It was so funny.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
So it's not 0-1. The program's not 0-1-0-1. Yeah. It's one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
It's fluid. It's just like 1-2-3-4-2-5-6-9-9-9. Oh, shit. I didn't even think about 2s.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
I said a little sequestered room with purple chairs.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
Yeah, it was nom, dude It was totally knowledge now, but I when I walked in there the mayor go first like they did in Vietnam You clear out the tunnels you're black you scout So it was like the bros some of the bros from the neighborhood and like so we all go But I was me and Brittany were like there first and she was like you talked to like set it all up I gotta figure out this to cake and I'm like pretty fucking high and
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
Yeah, there's dirty. There's my punch over this. They could punch over it. But there are. So I've met a couple of dirty white boys who were just like casually not like they're just casually drop the N word in conversation. I just be kind of like.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
And I don't know how to... You're trying to figure out a cake. Well, I'm trying to figure out rules of combat. Logistics of getting a cake. I'm trying to figure out logistics of battle.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
It was like maybe in their mid... This is what bugged me out. So I'm like very high. Bernie's handling, obviously, the fucking food. Yeah. She's like, that's like, you know, slop, just rations for the soldiers. And then it's like, I got to figure out logistics. So I go in and I'm talking to this... I mean, maybe in her mid-20s or 30s. There's, like, just ladies.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
Well, that's what I thought. I didn't want to, like, sound shitty, but I was so high. The lady was talking to me. I couldn't hear a word she was saying because I was like, damn, you work at laser tech. Like, not, like, in a condescending way, but I was, like, fully the reality of working at Lasertag as an adult. Exactly.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
I was just being, like, completely untethered by it, being like, what the fuck, dude? And then in there, it was a slow night. It was Monday night. So there was, like, Lasertag and then, like, Slash Arcade. I was just like taking in the whole ecosystem of being like, who owns this place? You two fucking work here at laser tech. I was like, damn, this is crazy.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
And then there was like, like a couple of, but then there was like, then there were these, like, you don't a casino. You'll have like the real card sharks and like card counters. There were like weird, like cat, like nerds walking around just quietly by themselves. Just pulling tickets out of machines. That's where I saw that video.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
He almost didn't make the first battle. He almost deserted. I searched all over for him.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
Dude, you know the level of nerds, like you'll just see them somewhere and they're just sitting like this? There was like those level of nerds.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
Just just sharking. Yeah, like fucking arcade games like devastating this fucking business You jack off like that
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
A little bit. It's a real delineator where you're like, yeah, shit. They're like sussing me out. They're like, I think I could. Yeah, it was kind of like one of those things where like, yeah, I'm not really about this life. You guys are living.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
Me, I left them there. Never mind. I was crushing basketball and I got like a gazillion tickets and I left them down. I was like, there was a couple of kids in there. I'm like, yeah, maybe the kids will take these tickets.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
LaMare and Nate were in one car and Gardini was in his and me and Brittany were behind them and we just see them, those two pull up at a light and I just see fucking, or it was like getting on a highway and I just see LaMare's sword come out of the window.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
It was so funny. Dude, the gameplay. And we're going to go back, too. I'm going to. I got to play again. Laser tag rules. Dude, this is the biggest indoor laser tag place. What's it called? Down south. Blazer tag.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
okay dude i'm not gonna it was the aliens on the yes yeah yeah yeah i drive past it all the time and i'm like oh i need to get that is the mothership bro i'm telling you it's it's 10 times more fun than you i like that was the thing i was like i got in there i'm like just standing there all high being like what the fuck dude this is like embarrassing everyone's gonna play laser tag for me
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
And then I got in there, and I'm like, this is maybe the most fun I've had. It's so fun. Bruh, and the fucking, the action of those things was good. Some laser tags, kind of bullshit. These things were kind of precise, bro.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
Oh, that's the best. Bro, there was little cutouts you could kind of hide and snipe.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
You could storm. And there was three color-coded teams, so it was like red, blue, blue.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
green and then like you would have to run around see someone's vest you'd see your your fucking your allies then you end up like taking over a chunk of like a base and just battling across and like i would try to storm the castle dude it was were you running yes yeah i i broke the rules i was running i knew you were running my name i was worried i'm gonna talk to that woman sliding i was sliding you're not sliding yes i did this is a call dude there is a ramp there's there's like down ramps and shit first of all my my name was butt stuff because you bet to make your own name
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
James tried to be 69 and she's like, you can't be that. So he's like, I'll be thick daddy. And I was like, I'll take B-U-T-T-S-T-U-F-F. And they just walked away real quick. Butt stuff.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
Lemaire walks in late. There's this whole group. It's probably like 18 people. Lemaire, you got to give the lady a name. He just goes, is Spider taken yet? She's like, no, you're good. He's like, yes.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
There was one point where I'm, like, ducking. You can, like, duck and come up these things. And, you know, I'd see people over there. And I, like, I knew someone was, like, right around the corner. So I, like, crawl up a ramp. And then I jump slid out sideways.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
Yeah. It was just Lily going, what the fuck are you doing? I was like, my bad. I'm sorry. Yeah, dude, I was belly crawl. Because you crawl on your belly, you're blocking the whole front. Crawl on my belly, pop up. And then my cousin was up high, hit me in the back on balls. I was like, dude, what the fuck? Damn. Yeah, it was. We have to go back and do that again, dude. It is.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
I mean, I couldn't believe, I couldn't get over how fun that was. Played two games.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
Yeah, he was Australian Special Forces in there, dude. He was. He was.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
Yeah, it was pretty nasty. Nate was unking around. It was pretty funny.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
Yeah. You know? Yeah, I mean, he... I mean, his name's Gene Lee, by the way. That's his rapper. That's his rapper. Yes. Gene Lee. and uh he's just like the problem was he stopped saying it because he like started getting some success and he had like people like managers being like you gotta stop saying the end that'll happen He had managers like, yo, you got to stop.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
And I said, I literally told her, I was like, I have a suspect, but I don't want to be unfair. I have blazer tags most wanted.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
I got back that night and I was just reflecting on my 39th birthday.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 543 - Spyder's Web
i was kind of the kids were there right no it was just oh my god my kids could i would never put them in battle like that i thought for sure this was a family affair no this was an adult just adults adults only was it but there was definitely just little kids in there with you it was no it was private oh it was private we didn't rent the whole thing out but it was our group and then there was another group between ours we got like a 15 minute break and then our group went back in oh that's awesome
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
Download the app today and use code Drench to get $50 instantly after you play your first $5 lineup. That's code Drench to get $50 instantly after you play your first $5 lineup. Prize picks. Run your game. Oh, yeah. Now it's time to plug shows. July, I'll be going to... I added a bunch of shows, so please come to them. I'm going to go to Oklahoma City. August 8th, I'll be in Louisville.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
But yeah, Oklahoma City and Louisville are the ones I'd really like you to buy tickets to. I thought the OKC Thunder fans would be fucking... to let loose for a comedy once they're done with all these playoff games. You know? Yeah. They're very stressful. Now it's time to let loose with a comedy show there. Totally agree. How about you, Sean? Do you have anything cool coming up, bud?
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
The link is below? I don't think I ever told you you could post your links.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
And I've seen the new hour, and it's very good. Thank you. It's your best hour yet. I'm excited to see it again. Thank you, bro. I'm excited to get it over with.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
Are you guys going to do a baby of the year award, or what's going on here? It's just month still?
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
Okay. And then you have a tournament in front of a live audience. And they put a cookie on the floor. Horny pieces of shit. If you want to go to the speakeasy and meet with the horniest guy, there's a horny guy meetup at the speakeasies.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
I thought about, yeah, the evil being spewed yesterday when I left the green room at the mothership. What happens? Like as soon as I leave this room, I guarantee. Yeah. Evil fucks up there.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
It probably is bugged. It probably is. I think the CIA is on Joe Rogan's ass, dude. I was talking to him. I was talking to him. It was funny. Last night I was like, we should go to that Oasis concert in Mexico City. And he was like, yeah, so I can go get kidnapped? Good call. I was like, yeah, I forgot. I forgot. He was like, I'll get kidnapped right away.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
Oh, we didn't even get to talk about the Mexican Navy. What happened?
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
Yeah, they tried to attack. They got stopped by our first line of defense, our bridge.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
Bro, did you see the footage of it? They were standing on the mast. There were dudes everywhere. They had someone in the crow's nest? The whole gang. I don't think there was one person piloting the ship. Everyone was standing on the mast. They were like holding hands on the mast. The first time I was like, I don't think they know how to ride a boat. They're standing on the wrong part.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
Oh. Just... I thought it was the Mexican Navy. Yeah, they were fucking stunting on us. What the fuck, man? There was a little show of force. They said, you guys want to talk shit on Mexico? Check this shit out. We got fucking cannons. We got a pirate ship.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
They were trying to plunder. They fucking... We just ran up on fucking ground. Oh, man.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
They did come for the gerbs, but then I'm hitting the fucking verge. The Brooklyn verge.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
Yeah, that's our new Iron Dome. The Golden Dome is so funny. I didn't know he was calling it the Golden Dome.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
The Mexicans standing on the mass. It's crazy. That's insane. Where were they going? Where did they think? I think I heard they were headed to Iceland for real. They were like, all right, this ship's headed to Iceland next. What? They fucking got hit by a fucking bridge. I felt bad for the Mexicans. When they crashed into the bridge? A couple of them died. Did they really?
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
You disrespected me in front of my friends. You disrespected me in front of my friends. In front of the openers. That's something I cannot have.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
And everybody, you know, there's like influencers underneath taking pictures and then a boat comes and everyone was laughing when they got hit. Literally, everyone was down there laughing and running.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
And the lads were hanging from the mast. They were tied. I think they were, like, tied up there. You're probably tied off.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
That sucks, too, because you're up there fucking hanging onto a mast. You're going, I guarantee we're going to hit that fucking bridge. You had a lot of time to be like, we're headed right at that bridge. There's no way we're getting under that.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
He's like a Jack Russell. Yeah, he is. It's like a car comes in front of his house. He must sprint around the house.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
They died. They're probably like, oh, this is the hell. This is the devil. What were you guys even thinking?
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
Yeah. I saw that joke you did last night. I'm going to do the same joke. I have a joke that's just like that. It reminded me. So I'm going to open with that tomorrow. I love it. Not to go off track, but that is the best. Oh, yeah. When an opener hears you do a joke and then the next show you hear him do a different joke. That's fucking the same topic.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
I think about that jet a lot. Oh, God. That thing came steaming right along.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
I think I'd rather be on the rocket than the fucking Mexican boat, though. The rocket was fast. The boat, you just fucking harness to a mast, seeing the Brooklyn Bridge come at you for fucking 20 minutes. Yeah. I don't know.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
Yes, with older pilots and young. Yeah, this is a common thing where they can't speak up against an older guy that's fucking up.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
I don't know how true that is because I've heard it. Really? Yeah, it's like an urban legend, I think.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
I knew it before you told me it. I've heard this. I know it's their culture, but I don't think it's true. I really doubt it's true.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
I don't think they've been doing that for a long time. They don't stab themselves in the bellies. They stop doing that. I think if you're in a plane crash or something's fucked up, In 2025, I think honor goes out the window. I hope. Dude, they got like K-pop and shit now. They're not... You're thinking old Asians.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
No, but they have that. That's in the world. They have fucking anime and shit now. True. They're all about disrespect. They've turned bad boys. I don't think so. The hat's turned backwards. They're bad boys. Isn't all anime about like a young guy being like, I am no longer your fucking pupil.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
It's time for me to fucking rise up and go, please hit that button.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
Yeah, he's too rich and powerful. God, he's too rich and powerful.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
They are moving in on us. They've been fucking gaining strength. He's gathering a small army. He is gathering. They're moving in. They wait patiently. They go, well, these guys are about done.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
You guys bet it. LeMaire had some freak-offs when I was gone. What?
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
Oh, yeah. Have you been following that trial at all? A little. I've been hearing it. Yeah. I haven't. I heard, did he like to clean up? Say what? Swapping the, you're talking about swapping the decks?
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
It's like, oh, yeah, your joke reminded me of my joke about that same topic, and I wanted to go before you. Yeah, all right. Perfect. You've had some disrespect as well. I've had this exact experience. Remember I sat down at a cheesecake factory, and they were like, where did you get this seat? Who are you? I was like, I don't know. I didn't just pick this. Somebody fucking walked me in.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
I didn't hear that from the trial. Somebody told me that that was in the trial. So I don't know if it is. I think he swabbed the decks. I think that was one of his things. But we were laughing about it earlier. Just that poor lady's husband's in the trial. He's listening. I know, bro.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
Now, obviously, he's into it. You think? Definitely.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
Day one you would have went, I'm out. Yeah. He's obviously like, I knew this about her.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
I would like a, you know how they do those courtroom drawings? It'd be funny to have him in the back, like dark red face with smoke coming out of his ears.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
Saying she liked it. Getting freaky. Yeah. Yeah. I didn't know that. She was saying like, yeah, and they called them FOs. She would be like, when's our next FO? She would be like, yeah, we need to do a freak. She would like be like, did he please? Did he?
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
Three minutes. You better get yours because I'm going to get mine.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
I'm about to freak off. I'm a freak. I had a couple of freak offs. I've been in a hotel for a week. I was having nothing but freak-offs down in Atlanta.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
I was fucking just jacking off in a hotel room for ten days.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
Sometimes you got to swab the deck like a cat before bed. Oh, man.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
The hostess was like, I've never seen this person in my life. I was like, what the fuck did you do that for? Why'd you just lie?
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
We get a little... I feel like we throw around sex trafficking a lot. It's definitely brought in... State lines are really...
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
So if I call a lady from, you know, Montana, and I don't explicitly say, I want to have sex, then we have sex.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
Trafficked. Congratulations, you've been trafficked by the best. I thought we were going to game. You just got tricked by one of the all-time traffickers.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
I mean, either way, he might have to become a Nazi if he goes to jail. Or if he did it right now, he's in full Nazi territory. He just has to be a Nazi. Yeah. I wonder if Kanye's music has reached the prisons. I think so. I think they're getting. I wonder if he could unite the ABs and the blacks. Whoa. And the Latinos are in trouble if the blacks become Nazis.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
I'm not in the hot seat, but I'm pretty sure he sampled All Quiet on the Western Front. And that's all it took for me. I've been waiting for somebody to sample that fucking noise. It happened to be in the worst song possible.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
but first time i listened to it i heard the dan and i was like oh here it comes and then it went right into i was like oh when that when that den and n kicks in i remember i saw the video being um premiered on one like the guy straight one of the streams yeah and i remember being like fuck but then it goes right back into just all quiet on the western front something oh that's kind of tight i think that's it right
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
I haven't heard anyone bring it up, which I'm surprised they haven't.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
As soon as I heard it, I said, it has to be this one.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
If I open Twitter, it's playing. Oh, yeah. It's everywhere.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
Yeah. Now he's yeah. Yeah, I do. Yeah. People were wondering how he was going to top. I suck my cousin's dick.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
no one's even talking about that people are going there's no way he can top that yeah imagine announcing that to the world and then the next week everyone's like yeah yeah fuck that check this out and you're like it's pretty wild people aren't bringing that up he might have regretted i suck my cousin's dick song and gone we gotta hurry up and get in the studio we gotta make these people forget about suck my cousin's dick song yeah but dude where did he find the guys in the video
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
That's got to be tough for you, Lamar, with your fucking Whoopi Goldberg view sensibilities.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
Yeah. The problem is with the new song is it does get stuck in your head a little. It completely does.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
It is fun to show people. Like there, I was so happy. He goes, I haven't heard it yet. I was like, oh, you haven't heard it yet? Wait till you fucking hear this. You're literally not going to believe it. While it's playing, you're going to go.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
I think he's allowed to have a bank account again. Can he? Yeah. I think they took it away the first time. That's crazy. That was crazy.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
Well, that only happens in certain situations. But... Yeah, well, he's... Meh. Wait a second. Hold on. Who's that one group? Matt. All right, let's switch this. What else is going on? Nate was defending Angel Reese with me in a text that was pissing me off. Nate loves Angel Reese. Nate's fucking gay.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
Fucking, no, Angel Reese flopped. It was just a regular basketball play. Come on, man. I wasn't defending Angel Reese.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
She pushed her hard with it. I got a feeling, I got a feeling Lamise is a Kaitlyn Clark lover.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
That is the trump card every single time. Anytime people get, like, a heated argument about this, you go...
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
No, I did not like that. Damn, that is fucked up. You're the only white member of the production, and you're the richest, and the only one that gets paid a million dollars. I'm not white. That's crazy. The other guys get paid in Chipotle every other week. Chipotle every other week is good, dude.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
You are. He's the heart and soul of this. It would be funny to edit all this out. Anytime we talk about you being rich, just edit it. I'll never notice it. I'll never know. It's crazy.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
It was all Shadur. Now it's... This week it was Caitlin Clark, Angel Reese. Yeah, that was the big one. Because black pundits started going back and forth.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
RG3... RG3 was just saying Angel Reese clearly is jealous and hates Caitlin Clark. And then Ryan Clark jumped in and was like, you have a white wife, dude. Shut the fuck up. And then black people had to pick sides. Damn. Yeah. You can speak on WNBA.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
You're the only one in the room who can speak on WNBA. I know you can't. I know, you can't either.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
I was just sitting there like... The only black spaz I really ever absorbed was in our old apartment when that lady came back with her fucking big dog to kick us out.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
They do bash the queens. They talk about how white women are subservient. Yeah. They talk about that a lot. I've heard Charles and White go off on it. It was very funny. It was really funny.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
He went nuclear because he was wrong. There's nothing wrong with that. Losing an argument and going, you know what? You have braces. I see why RC hit the fucking eject on the combo. I'm going to change the topic right now. Don't you have a fucking white wife?
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
Yeah, he was out in the cold too long. Whatever happened with that? They're still in court. They're still in court?
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
I wanted a speedy trial for that. This is not getting a speedy trial.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
Matt worked with this realtor and they came back to like evict us. I didn't give a fuck. I had zero dollars. We were getting evicted from West Philly. I was just sitting at the top of the steps, and they were downstairs. They were like, you need to get out right now. And I was like, oh, do I? I was a fucking gargoyle on the steps.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
Yeah, they're finally getting pussy, and the goddamn entire judicial system's fucking weaponized against them. Can't lick cum off your wife anymore?
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
Your Honor, it was his birthday. Hold on. I need to talk to my attorney. It was my birthday. That one was actually my birthday. Strike that from the jury. Disregard that. That was his birthday.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
Yeah, male prostitutes are only... Top ten most beautiful women in the world?
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
You're swabbing the deck, and then you get in there, you see Cassie, you go, this is going to be great. And then Diddy comes out of the closet, you go, oh, shit. I'm going to have to fucking swab the deck again. God damn it.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
Maybe it wasn't he had too many secrets. He was just like, this trial is going to be so fucking embarrassing.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
I have so many texts that just suck. That would keep you awake at night.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
It is crazy that it did. I mean, we talked about it, but the fact that every black dude on earth was saying every rapper was gay. Yeah. And we were like, what the fuck are they talking about? I dude, it was like, you guys are crazy. God damn. They nailed it.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
Yeah. There's like three that aren't gay and they're chirping like 50 years. It must feel so good. Method man. Just to be like, I wasn't one of the gay ones. Yup.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
Even getting caught in the crosshairs of it is just like, fuck. Could have happened to any of us. I would have gone to a fucking ditty party in a heartbeat. Well. Not knowing what was going to happen. If I got there and there was a freak off, I would fucking get the fuck out of there. Yeah. Just because I'd be totally embarrassed and humiliated.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
I need a little sunlight. You guys are hogging all the fucking sun. And some fucking male stripper would come over and go, hey, fuck off me. What is this?
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
Fucking guy tugged me and I ran. I ran out of the house crying. He tugged me. He tugged me. I started swinging like a pig and raced out of the party. Yeah.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
That's when my butt plug fell out and I shit everywhere and I had to sprint.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
Damn, if your plug fell out and you dumped, freaks would come out of the walls like cockroaches and clean it up. Where am I? Four days of drugs. Dude, what are we talking about? You go on a four-day Bud Lightbender, you go, oh. Yeah, man. Think about doing drugs and getting tugged and butt sex. Do you know how fucking tired you must be?
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
Your eating must be fucking hell in there, too. Oh, yeah.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
Yeah, a lot of grapes. A lot of people handing you grapes.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
I don't know, dude. Are the honks innocent? Are the honks quiet during all this? The honks are awfully quiet right now.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
He's been acting out? I don't even think he's acting out. I don't know. I've seen it. He doesn't seem that crazy. He's posting shit on Instagram.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
Yeah. A lot of people are, yeah, a lot of people are. I don't understand the Bieber hysteria. He seems kind of crunk.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
Yeah, I'm not worried about anything. I'm crunk. Why is everyone asking if I'm all right? I've been crunk this whole time.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
Nothing worse than being crunk and someone goes, are you all right?
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
Yeah, and someone comes up to you and goes, you should go home. You go, oh, shit. I thought I was killing it tonight.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
Yeah, he has a lot of money. Well, that's probably worth... $200 million.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
And at any point, he can go do a tour and make... That is all better. All this behavior is better than Zuckerberg's outfit. That's a guy who's losing his fucking mind.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
I think he bought a tunnel. I think he is, dude.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
I don't know if that's his house. Every Jewish man's dream. I'm going to get a beachfront tunnel.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
Damn, that is nice when you upgrade your tunnel so much that you have to call it a bunker. Yeah. Finally. The Jewish bunkers under New York sounds a lot better.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
down there screaming she can't hear you in the bunker see el chapo just pop into your living room you're like what the fuck yeah the mexican the jews must have bumped into each other what the heck are you doing down here yeah that's nice i understand the tunneling though yeah get down there It's like, you remember when it would snow when you were a kid? You go, I'd love to build a tunnel.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
Oh, yeah, dude. It's like the way Billy likes big boy toys. Yeah. I bet Jewish dudes, you're like, why are you tunneling? They're like, I don't know. This is like my favorite thing.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
It's fun. It's fun to do sneaky, no one knows what I'm doing now. I don't know what it is. I just like tunneling underneath New York. I could be, you know, in my house. Next thing I know, no one sees me. Next thing I know, I just pop up in another house and everyone goes, who the fuck is this guy? Yeah, we can't. We're never going to move on. Number one, Mexican boat hitting the bridge.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
It's never not going to be funny. Alzheimer. Jewish guy coming out of the fucking sewer grate. Sorry.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
That's probably there. That was kind of ours. Charlottesville was tough for the honks. Yes. I remember that because I vividly remember that. We had a podcast. We had a live podcast at Helium the night before, and I was like, Trump fucking rules. White people are back. I was thinking it was funny.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
The next day, Charlottesville happened, and I was hungover laying on a couch watching the news going, oh, not good. We might have to delete that podcast.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
We probably had a conversation on the phone, just like, dude, I don't know. Yeah, it's fucking hilarious, but I don't think we should do it. I know. Charlottesville, yeah. Fuck. I know, what an idiot. Dude, the hangover, laying on the couch, watching Charlottesville, just going...
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
And he was a big... He was a big... He's kind of a big dog. He was a thick gay steward.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
I am. I am. Yeah, it's a message. One of the babes. Dude, I... Get hit with an away message, you go, ooh.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
Just getting home from a long day of school. All the kids are fucking pieces of shit. You go, all right, I'm going to see what's going on on the World Wide Web. Oh, it's followed me home.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
Almost like all of the teachers. Really? Dude, my high school was like a poor Catholic school. Yeah, yeah. We had teachers that were making like 20 grand a year. None of them were qualified. I don't even think you had to have a teaching degree. Yeah, there was one lady who was, she was, I don't know, she was fucking blind. But we had doors in the front and back of the classroom.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
And when she was teaching and I had a period off, I would see how many times I could walk laps through her class before she noticed. She'd be teaching and I would just be walking through the class. By like the sixth lap, she'd be like, Mr. Gillis. What are you doing in here? She was like a fucking idiot. We had a lady who, big dog. She was funny. She was nice.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
But actually, she was our science teacher. We went on a field trip. And she was like, what do you guys want to do for lunch? And I was like, old country buffet. I got a chain on the bus. And she was like, old country buffet. She took us to OCB. That's awesome. Yeah, she was awesome. But I would sing Werewolves of London under my breath at all times.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
Anytime she turned her back, I'd go, I saw a werewolf, a Chinese man, and she would go. Right, yeah. And then, oh, fuck, there was a game we played. It was like cow in the pen or something where we would all pick up our desks and surround her. And she was just one of those ladies that was like, what are you guys doing? Cut it out. That's so sick. Yeah. She was awesome.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
It's the only way to combat it. Yeah, exactly. Because if you spaz, it's over. Oh, dude. Because you have teachers that spaz.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
We had teachers spaz all the time. We had ladies cry constantly. And then, oh, man, that was the best. When we were growing up, we had a...
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
teacher that would cry all the time in spaz but she also sang in the church choir and we didn't have a choir but she would sing at church we had like one lady sing did you ever have that yeah it's just one woman they'd play organs and you'd hear a lady but uh we uh we would always tell her how much we loved her singing Gentle woman. Such a good song. He's full of. Yeah.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
And her and another lesbian teacher would sing it. They would duet it. And we would be like, can you guys, can you please sing it? And they'd be like, fine. We'd be in the middle of class. We'd be like, can you please sing that song? And she would sing it and we would all laugh. And then she would do it again. She fell for it every time.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
songs and then we just had like you know cantors here and there would come in strut their stuff the uh we've talked about i think before but the one that always got me was at the end of christmas mass they sang joy to the world fired me up every time yeah once it started i'd be like oh it's time to play with fucking my big boy toys this is the most lit song it was charlottesville yeah it was too litty
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
It was the longest mass of all time. Oh, my God. It was one hour, but it felt like an eternity. It did.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
I know, you always have to wait for the fucking priest to go. And then we got to shake his hand out in the fucking narthex. Now, what was it called? The fuck's a narthex?
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
Yeah, it's the narthex. We've got to meet up in the narthex to shake the priest's hand.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
Yeah, you got to talk to him. You got to explain to the priest why you were talking during mass today. I was bad.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
Getting out to the Narthex was so nice, though. During masks, he'd be like, I have to go to the bathroom. And your parents would be like, no, you fucking don't. I know you don't have to go to the bathroom. Dad, I had to.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
Yeah, you just go out in the north exit and go, god damn, it's nice out here. It's quiet. No one's out here. I feel like I'm doing something.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
Fucking standing in the back. Yeah, my dad would spend the full hour just the most furious anyone's ever been. Start to finish of mass. He'd be like, you fucking made a noise. He'd be like, shut the fuck up. Come here. Come here. Come here. You had to sit next to him. He'd go, fuck.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
by the back of the neck and dig in and go, shut the fuck up. Sing. Sing a fucking song.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
You'd get sent down next to Dad. That blows, dude.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
It is crazy, man. Every single boy is just fucking rock hard. Diamond hard. You're the most horny you've ever been in your life, and your dad's next to you going...
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
You should have. That's the only way to break the curse. You got to give it to somebody else. Everyone's disrespecting you. You have to disrespect somebody else.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
Knock it off. I wonder, you know, I never got around to asking my sisters, but do you think the ladies get fucking horny in there too?
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
You think the girls are horny too? For sure. Yeah, they must be.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
You guys don't even know. It was tight, man. Lemaire hates Catholicism. I went to Catholic school. True, you got kicked out for diddying. You had a free golf that kicked you out. Yeah, it used to suck. Catholic church? Yeah.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
What? Yeah. We had church. Did you guys have church during school hours?
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
Because that would fucking rock. Every class is going to be 10 minutes shorter. Yep. Fuck yeah. Me and my boys would belt out too. It was so fun. Church and school was fucking hilarious.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
This is how I worship. Get off my back. All right, we should switch over to Patreon.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
I caught some strays on my flight home this weekend. Did you? Yeah, just some fucking drunk guy sitting next to me or across the aisle, and he was like, I could tell you're somebody because I saw your lady friend that you're with, and then I saw you, and I was like, what? I was like, oh, cool, man. Like, what the fuck was that for?
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
Yeah, I get hit with that all the time. Last night, we were out, and a guy was like, my friend looks retarded, too. I was like, yeah. Cool, man. Thanks, man. Can I have pictures? Yeah, for sure. Can we look retarded in the pictures? I don't have a choice. I'm gonna. Let's get the picture.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
I haven't seen you in a week, so I miss you. There's another disrespect.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
Thank you, babe. Babes with braces, they must be humble. True. Unless they get hit with a fucking... Shut up, brace face. They have to be humble at all times. True. Nice braces, you 50-year-old fucking... Wow, wow.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
Now that's something we would say if we were being mean.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
If I got attacked by a brace-faced lady. Yeah. I'd go, I don't know who you're talking to with those fucking braces in your mouth.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
Adult braces are fucking sick. I love them. I mean, to be rocking braces instead of Invisaligns at this point. It's awesome. It's kind of a power move, honestly. I know. Terrell Davis had braces. Did he really? Yeah, he was the man. Running back for the Broncos, you remember him? He had fucking braces. Game day 98, that was my go-to. Yeah, he was nasty. He was awesome.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
Adult braces, they should come back. My friend's dad got braces and it was fucking hilarious. That's wild.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
Yeah, you can't wear braces at a construction site.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
He did have a nice answer. I was like, dude, why do you keep buying? Why do you want a huge, expensive truck? He's like, I just like them and they're my favorite things. That's fair. I was like, well, that's totally fair, man. He's like, it's the one thing I like in this entire world. I want a big truck. All right, man. He does love big trucks. He loves big trucks.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
hops and he goes damn he's like looking around oh this is a wagon they're so nice dude the escalator is probably 160 it's crazy i'm like stop giving me truck new escalators are sick though are they yeah yeah they're on his radar he's like they're fucking 160 they're crazy dudes oh my dude that's the least practical truck for where his vehicle for where he lives don't get a little beater bro get the bucket get in the bucket that's all he needs is a little bucket i'm surprised you're whipping that uh accord
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
As a big boy toy. The Fatmobile. Five fat in the Fatmobile. Five fats stumbling out. Everyone's arguing over it.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
I don't know. They are suckling off you. All your ad revenue.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
Yeah, you could have got a civic. You don't need all that space. But I get it. Once those checks start rolling in.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
I love telling the group chat how rich you are. All the New York, we're in a group chat with the most evil New York comics. Vampires. They are vampires. They fucking, they're like, Austin comedy sucks. I just screenshotted the cellar lineup yesterday. I was like, New York's sick. This fucking garbage lineup. They're purists. They're such purists, dude. Yes. Purists.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
Oh, man, we might be getting some Chantilly Lace coming up. What's that? That would be so awesome. One of the ultimate vampires is Lev. Guys, this episode is brought to you by PrizePix. The basketball playoffs have been unbelievable, and the action is still heating up on PrizePix, the best place to cash in your favorite sports. Matt, what do you think about the playoffs so far?
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
Shane Gillis Alexander going against the Ant-Man. Yeah. Are there any particular teams or fixtures that you've enjoyed?
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
Knicks-Pacers is a classic series. It's, dude, it's just, I've been like, what the heck? I think it's time you cash in on the basketball playoffs with prize picks. Don't miss your last chance to add your favorite players from the court to your prize picks lineup. Whether it's points, rebounds, assists, take your pick of more or less for your shot to win up to 2,000 times your cash today.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
How much money do you have? Now imagine it times 2,000.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
Yeah, that would change things. You'd be able to get a bunker. This is what I'm thinking. Sample picks. I'm going to go Caitlin Reese, less points. Angel Reese, less points. More rebounds, though. She does get boards, dude. Yeah, that's what I think. There you go. All right, you heard our picks. Now it's time to lock in your playoff picks with prize picks. Don't miss out on Flex Friday.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
Make sure you opt in and tap the checkbox in your lineup builder to be eligible for the protected play. I love protected play. Me too. JK, I love unprotected play. Choose squares from any game on the board. If your lineup does not win, you get your net losses back in promo funds up to your promo limit as soon as the lineup settles.
Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast
Ep 560 - Big Boy Toys
I'm telling you, PrizePix is the best place to turn your sports knowledge into cash. You can submit your picks in 60 seconds or less. It's so easy, I'm doing it right now. No, I'm not. Or am I? That's what they wrote. I didn't think that was funny. I don't want you guys who listen to this podcast looking for comedy to think that that's the type of shit I'm fishing out. All right.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
"I Feel Behind in My Career. Help!"
And I was actually still in college when I pretty much started working full time at the Gardner News. I was a correspondent, but I was doing four or five stories a week while I was still in school. I'm also very much like I see something new that I like and I'm all about it, but I can easily get burned out. Things catch my eye and it's like, well, I want to do that now.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
"I Feel Behind in My Career. Help!"
That's also hurt me in my career because I think about. I don't want to get sidetracked, but my wife, who I love dearly, she did not go to college, but she's bright. She got a job at a corporation when she was 20 years old. She's worked at that corporation since then. She's a mid-level manager now, and she makes like $70,000 a year. And it only happened because she stuck with it.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
"I Feel Behind in My Career. Help!"
even now, like I'm super proud of my current position. Like, so Jason, we talked about how I told you I make $26 an hour. Now I started here less than three years ago and I started at $19 an hour. Hmm.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
"I Feel Behind in My Career. Help!"
I think I'd like to make like $100,000 a year. Okay, okay. I'm happy with everything about my job except money.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
"I Feel Behind in My Career. Help!"
Process something I should be doing.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
"I Feel Behind in My Career. Help!"
I love writing. I like teaching. I do like imparting my knowledge on others. And I don't know if that's different than teaching. I don't want to get into semantics. It's different than teaching children, I think. Teaching adults is a different thing, especially if they have the desire to learn. Maybe I've always not wondered, like, are people going to want to hear what I have to say?
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
"I Feel Behind in My Career. Help!"
Would they value what I have to teach them, I guess, is... The question again, this goes back to not sticking at things for very long. Like I can't say Sean has been a paralegal for 20 plus years. Come learn from him.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
"I Feel Behind in My Career. Help!"
I really like that idea. The law firm here is part of an organization that does like seminars and things for lawyers. And during the seminars, they always have people that present their products and things like that. And I could picture myself presenting my products like how to write like a human. Yes.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
"I Feel Behind in My Career. Help!"
How to communicate effectively with your clients, you know, or even developing templates that explain processes, you know, like you're getting divorced. Here's what to expect.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
"I Feel Behind in My Career. Help!"
Theoretically, I could do that while still being committed to my current job. It's something that you can start and then see how it goes. And maybe it turns out that it's wildly successful and I don't need to be a paralegal, but maybe it doesn't. And it just means it's a way that I can get to that number that I need to be at.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
"I Feel Behind in My Career. Help!"
I really appreciate you guys today because I was thinking I was coming here and you guys would be like, Sean, don't you know that the hot new field is this? And maybe you could pursue a job in that. You can't just say to somebody like, oh, just go get a better job. Like that's not really a valid thing. You got to look at things differently. You guys definitely helped me do that.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
"I Feel Behind in My Career. Help!"
I've never heard of it. So I have to go look.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
"I Feel Behind in My Career. Help!"
So Jason, I heard an episode a couple weeks ago and you were talking about, you know, the way you got started was coming up with basically inventing memes. And you talked about your Twitter, the Twitter thing, selfies at funerals, stuff like that. But If we go way back, what I remember you getting your start with was scamming the scammers.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
"I Feel Behind in My Career. Help!"
And your original website way long ago, the thing that drew me to your creativity was this month long conversation you had with a man from Nigeria. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Yes. Yes.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
"I Feel Behind in My Career. Help!"
Thank you, Jason. I've been talking to everybody I work with now, like how I'm going to be talking with a guy today. And 20 years ago, we were like almost in the exact same position. We had both graduated from college. We're both starting our new career in the field of journalism at a small town newspaper. But things have definitely taken different paths for us.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
"I Feel Behind in My Career. Help!"
How did we end up in such different ways? And that's not to say your way is much better than my way or that I'm unsuccessful. But there are things that I wish maybe I would have done differently. So my question is now, how could I catch up? I haven't made the best career decisions in the past.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
"I Feel Behind in My Career. Help!"
And some other things have happened that have kind of made it so that I'm not where I want to be as far as my career goes.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
"I Feel Behind in My Career. Help!"
So if we go to the Wayback Machine to the Gardner News 20 years ago, Jason and I were both young reporters. I felt pretty successful there. If you've had to pick the ace of the staff at the time, it was me over Jason. I agree. I covered City Hall and our main city. I wrote massive amounts of stories. Jason already had big eyes back then. This was his stepping stone for sure.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
"I Feel Behind in My Career. Help!"
For me, it was my hometown newspaper. I always kind of feel a connection with my employers, like I'm very loyal in that way. And I had like this idealist view of local journalism and the battle we're fighting and the public service that we're providing. I was happy to be a local news reporter because it was so important.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
"I Feel Behind in My Career. Help!"
The primary reason was money. When I started at the newspaper, I think I made $10 an hour. This was 20 years ago. When I left, I think I was making $12 an hour. And it just wasn't feasible. So like I said, I had a lot of relationships in the community from being a reporter. And one of those was at the police department. And they had openings for police dispatcher.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
"I Feel Behind in My Career. Help!"
And to me at the time, the pay, I think it was like $40,000, which was significantly more than what I was making. And I liked the people there. I had a good relationship. I'm like, okay, I will do that. So I took that position. I worked overtime. I think I made $50,000 a year. To me at that time, it was good money.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
"I Feel Behind in My Career. Help!"
Yeah. So I get the job at the police department. I immediately know I'm not doing this the rest of my life. It was very monotonous. My favorite part of my job is I got to be an advisor for the Explorers program, which was a program that taught law enforcement to local high school kids. I really like working with kids. I said, I should be a teacher.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
"I Feel Behind in My Career. Help!"
In Massachusetts, you don't have to have a teaching degree. You just have to pass a test. There's two tests you have to take. I passed both of them and I had my teaching license. I had a hard time finding a job for a while, and eventually I found a non-traditional school. My salary is $30,000 a year. I went backwards, but I'm like, that's okay. I'm a teacher now. It will work itself out.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
"I Feel Behind in My Career. Help!"
I start to find a lot of success at my job. A few years in, I get nominated for an award, a national teaching award. I created an organic garden for my students. We called it the Fresh Start Organic Garden. It's amazing. And then the school was sold to another organization. The culture definitely changed. Fast forward three years and I can't really do it anymore.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
"I Feel Behind in My Career. Help!"
The kids have changed and a former boss of mine is a principal at a public school and they had no opening and I applied for that job and I got it. The salary at that position was $63,000 a year.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
"I Feel Behind in My Career. Help!"
Not really. So this is my research is I talked to an uncle that I have when my career change is happening. He's actually he's very smart. And he said, you know, what do you like doing? And we talked about things I like doing. He goes, have you ever thought about being a paralegal? He says, I think they make like seventy five thousand dollars a year. And me, I said, well, he's very smart.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
"I Feel Behind in My Career. Help!"
In my mind, I always kind of find ways to justify like, well, if they're doing the average paralegal in Massachusetts and they're including Boston and Boston's rates are going to be much higher than the rates in Worcester or the rates in Gardner. That's fine.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
"I Feel Behind in My Career. Help!"
I'm not going to drive to Boston to be a paralegal because I'd be spending so much money on the commute and my quality of life would be less. Maybe I have a hard time thinking, like, if I look that up, is it going to be accurate for me?
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
"I Feel Behind in My Career. Help!"
Part of the reason maybe that I hold on to jobs is maybe some of that fear as well. Like, I definitely could have left my job at the private nonprofit school many years before I did. And I think part of it was maybe it was insecurity about, well, I didn't go to school for teaching. Am I going to be able to go to another school and be okay?
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
"I Feel Behind in My Career. Help!"
Does that resonate? It absolutely does. Because I can even tell you, Jason, I went to school for one year to get my paralegal certificate because I had the opportunity to do so. Applied for jobs as soon as I finished. I took my second job offer and I did that because I'm scared. I need to get a job. And if we go way back, Jason, we talk about how our paths diverged.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
"I Feel Behind in My Career. Help!"
I don't want to make a pity party for me, but I think our backgrounds are pretty different as well. I don't know your full background, but I know that, you know, Your parents seemed to be okay. I remember your dad was a dentist.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
"I Feel Behind in My Career. Help!"
So my dad passed away when I was 20 years old and my mom wasn't in my life. So I was in college when my father passed away. My stepmother basically kicked me out of my house while I was still in college. Like I came home one weekend from college and she goes, your stuff's packed up. I don't know what you're doing, but you can't stay here. I was in a situation where I needed to have a job.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
"I Feel Behind in My Career. Help!"
I needed to know what was going on because I didn't have a safety net where if I went a significant amount of time without working that I would feel like I'd be surviving. But I think that's a big thing. It's like, Jason, you maybe had more of an opportunity when we were starting out back then. Like, hey, if I take a chance and something doesn't work out, I'm going to be okay.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
"I Feel Behind in My Career. Help!"
Yeah, I mean, I'm not afraid to follow the things that I want to do. So actually, when I started in college, I was a business major and I started working at the college newspaper, like in the business office, and they wanted to start a business page. And I said, I'll do it, even though I didn't study journalism. And I really liked it. And then so I added journalism as my second major.
Otherworld
Episode 124: Off Trail
It was stark white, which has that almost moonlight-y reflective quality. It came to a point at the top when I first saw it. And it seemed relatively like stable or more physical at that point. And then as soon as it moved, it didn't look exactly the same in any two moments. It just darted into the woods without making any remote sound.
Otherworld
Episode 124: Off Trail
And it almost looked like it was zigzagging between trees to where for a half second it would be closer. And then it would take an angle and then suddenly look five, ten feet further away than it was a second before. This is all maybe from 30 feet away, 40 feet away. For a split second, it would look like it was nine feet tall. Another it would look for, maybe.
Otherworld
Episode 124: Off Trail
But the depth kept changing until it just completely faded into like behind bushes in the distance. especially by the time we got to the point in the trail where it would have been when we first saw it, trying to put it into perspective with the trees around it, it was hard to gauge zigzagging in a way that really doesn't make sense.
Otherworld
Episode 124: Off Trail
And we both froze, and we were just watching it, trying to track it. For a second, especially towards the end, when it was getting further away, it almost looked like like an enormous cattail in the way they kind of bob. And it made no noise. It was after it rained, so the woods are crackling, but we heard absolutely nothing while it's ripping through these bushes, maybe 30 feet away from us.
Otherworld
Episode 124: Off Trail
It wasn't translucent like that's that's actually one of the things that always strikes me about it thinking about it now like it was almost too solid it was very physical especially in being Twilight it was just very stark against everything if this makes any sense it almost looked like something that was overlaid over everything else to be honest now
Otherworld
Episode 124: Off Trail
A lot of how stark white it was is the thing that really sets it aside because of the fact that it was a dark day and this thing looked like it had no bearing on the environment around it. Branches it was running into and like the bramble it was going through, it didn't move. And I've replayed this in my head more than anything in my life at this point.
Otherworld
Episode 124: Off Trail
If this was something I was looking away from at the wrong time, it would have been so easy to miss. But we both locked onto it and just kind of watched it recede into the distance in five or six seconds. Both of us were pretty freaked out. It took us almost an hour to get to that point in the trail.
Otherworld
Episode 124: Off Trail
So my first thought is, okay, well, whatever that was, we have to just keep walking in the other direction. This, you know, kind of unlike the help thing at first, this we really weren't laughing about, especially based on feeling pretty isolated. And the fact that the weird feeling that had kind of hung over the day just felt like it was validated.
Otherworld
Episode 124: Off Trail
And the other thing that's making the whole thing worse is the fact that it is rapidly getting darker, like hitting now the middle to tail end of twilight. So we keep going on and eventually turn on our phone flashlights. It gets to that point. I didn't realize this at the time, but, you know, we were now holding hands, which we were not I didn't realize I was grabbing pretty tight.
Otherworld
Episode 124: Off Trail
I think I was trying to put on a face of not being as freaked out as I was. So we walk on for maybe five, ten more minutes. I'm looking at the woods the entire time. She's looking ahead. We have our flashlights on. And she gives the biggest like, gasp I've heard out of someone. It sounded like the wind got knocked out of her. And I look over to where her flashlight is in front of us.
Otherworld
Episode 124: Off Trail
And in the ground, maybe four feet across, is the word help etched in very scratchy almost threatening letters. At this point, she froze, like mouth to hand. I have never felt my stomach drop harder. My main thought was, we need to leave right now. My creeping thought that kept
Otherworld
Episode 124: Off Trail
coming in was not only that I can't believe this is really happening, it was almost the thought that if this is happening, then literally anything could happen by the time we get out of this trail. If we get out of this trail. We now started really walking hard, not running I think I was stupid enough to even at the time say, don't run. Mainly because I don't, we were still far enough.
Otherworld
Episode 124: Off Trail
I don't think we even would have had the energy to make it out. As we were going, eventually she's able to kind of snap out of it a bit. And now we're both walking extremely fast. And I told her, you look ahead and I'm going to look behind. I mean, it probably looked pretty ridiculous from afar, but I was speed walking backwards, just looking at the woods and flashing a light around.
Otherworld
Episode 124: Off Trail
To be honest, it was probably only something like 20 minutes. I could hear my heart beat the entire time. She asked, should we run? And we pretty much just start booking it from there. I was wearing Timbs at the time and I almost immediately tripped. which again, when you see it in movies, like everybody else, I always thought it was ridiculous when people trip at the worst possible time.
Otherworld
Episode 124: Off Trail
Having experienced it, it now makes a lot of sense. It's almost like I forgot how to run. Honestly, we made good time. I mean, she was an athlete. I am not. So we got to the end of the trail so fucking relieved. we're catching our breath. I even just looked back at the mouth of it for a while and went back to the car. We were the only car there, as we thought.
Otherworld
Episode 124: Off Trail
Got in, caught our breaths, went to drive out. And we didn't really talk about it much on the ride back in specific, but I remember trying to figure out what to do with the rest of the night or where to even go from there. And both of us wanted to be in a loud public space. So we got friends and we went to a bar nearby us. We told them the story, but kind of like
Otherworld
Episode 124: Off Trail
We both told like an abridged version of it because we were clinging to a certain amount of rationalization about it. And even the rationalization was horrifying. I got home and I again gave like a very abridged version of it to my parents. I remember even taking a shower that night and just replaying that same six seconds of seeing this thing over and over again. I actually ended up
Otherworld
Episode 124: Off Trail
you know, taking legal pads and trying to like draw it and be like, no, that wasn't quite that and it's not quite this. The next day I went over to her place and that was when we first started talking about what we think it actually was. We both immediately threw out the desperate sort of rationalizations we had to get through the moment and admitted that
Otherworld
Episode 124: Off Trail
We have no idea, but it was nothing normal. While we were talking, she went, wait, fuck, look. And there was a candle lit by us. And I was like, when she said that, I was like, oh, God, it's back. And it wasn't. She was just staring at the candle. And she was like, that's what it looked like. That's how it moved.
Otherworld
Episode 124: Off Trail
And it suddenly clicked to me that it was like, oh, wait, this, it did kind of seem like a impossibly white, skinny candle flicker. At this point, I was really just trying to put it all out of my head, and I was leaving for this road trip in two days. So I left. I went on a road trip with my friend. I told him the story. He was blown away by it.
Otherworld
Episode 124: Off Trail
I ended up having a panic attack on the trip while I was thinking about it too much. We were in New Orleans and he was like, oh, you should get a reading. I wanted absolutely nothing to do with it. My ex and I really, she barely will talk about it. She's thoroughly of the belief that this was something that doesn't want to be discussed.
Otherworld
Episode 124: Off Trail
And she's very superstitious about evoking it or potentially bringing it back. She's made her peace with it by putting it away. I find myself coming back to it maybe too often. One of the things that I've made peace with is the fact that whatever this is, and I can't remotely claim to know what it is other than that, it was something supernatural is probably the only thing I can give.
Otherworld
Episode 124: Off Trail
But it has opened me up in kind of a positive way to look at the world with a lot more openness and a lot more curiosity. Because if something like that is possible, then who am I to shut down any other belief? When it came time to move out to LA, I did very eagerly just because since then I haven't been fully comfortable at home. Even going back for holidays,
Otherworld
Episode 124: Off Trail
If I'm out at night and I'm around quiet woods or just in the Pine Barrens, I mean, I haven't been in a trail since.
Otherworld
Episode 124: Off Trail
My name is Sean. I'm from Long Island, New York, 26 years old, and I'm currently living in Studio City, California. Mostly trying to get into the film industry, but, you know, it's ended up being mostly working at bars, worked as a mover, office administrator. I've had maybe like seven or eight jobs in the three years that I've been here, all overlapping.
Otherworld
Episode 124: Off Trail
So when this happened, it was kind of between the tail end of 2019 and the beginning of 2020. It was on Long Island, specifically Manorville, where I grew up. I feel like it kind of has a reputation for being a weird enough place. Maybe I'm biased, but particularly Manorville. It's known as like the gateway to the Hamptons, but it's really just in the middle of the Pine Barrens.
Otherworld
Episode 124: Off Trail
It's essentially like a semi-rural area of cookie cutter development separated by huge swaths of woods. So growing up, I spent a lot of time hanging around in trails because most of my friends, you know, we were all in the same developments and the best way to get to them was through trails.
Otherworld
Episode 124: Off Trail
I mean, one of the best things we even had to do was take like an hour and a half walk to get to 7-Eleven, if that kind of illustrates how really little there was around there. I do think it was a great place to grow up for that reason. Like it did feel like, you know, kids kind of ran the trails. You would run into people and growing up, that was really cool.
Otherworld
Episode 124: Off Trail
I mean, I was really never afraid in the woods at all. The thing is, as I got older, I started recognizing that some of it was a lot eerier. It didn't help that the Long Island serial killer that like got caught maybe two years ago Four of those bodies were found in Manorville in some of the same trails that I was going through all the time as a kid.
Otherworld
Episode 124: Off Trail
There was always this feeling that, like, you could go down the wrong path and, you know, something could potentially be there. I mean, it's kind of like a Stephen King town in Manorville. Like, there's something that feels kind of off. So really where this story starts is getting home for Thanksgiving that last semester of college.
Otherworld
Episode 124: Off Trail
Flash forward 2019, I'm a senior in college and my girlfriend at the time and I had just recently broken up. We had been pretty much together since 10th grade onward. So it was a fairly heavy situation. And she was in New York City. I was in Boston. In hindsight, it was definitely bound to happen. I think it had a lot to do with the fact that we had been together that long.
Otherworld
Episode 124: Off Trail
And we were living really different lives at the time. We met up. the day after Thanksgiving. And she wanted to catch up or, you know, just kind of have closure, get coffee or something. We agreed to meet up pretty late that night, maybe around 9 or 10. I think it's worth noting that we also, we lived in the same development, so there's maybe a three-block walk between us.
Otherworld
Episode 124: Off Trail
But I decided to just pick her up in my brother's car instead. We drove back to in front of my place and for a while debated going inside to talk about it. But to be honest, it felt like it should have been maybe an hour conversation at most. So we just kind of stayed in the car, which is actually where a lot of this started. Like you can imagine, it was a very loaded conversation.
Otherworld
Episode 124: Off Trail
But at the same time, we brought beers. At the time I was smoking, she was smoking. So we were going through cigs in my brother's car, which really wasn't the most courteous thing to do. But either way, an hour turned into two hours, turned into three. And by the end, I would say we were actually having a really good time. It really felt like a relief in being so worried about this conversation.
Otherworld
Episode 124: Off Trail
And we both kind of went back to that, you know, best friend who used to date level. So it gets really late and the conversation's been going on this long. We end up going back into my house and I got out of the car, went into the house. And I remember being like, oh, shit, I forgot to lock it. So I went back to the car to lock it and we go inside, she spends the night.
Otherworld
Episode 124: Off Trail
So 5.30 next morning, we get up to leave and we get in the car. And you know, when you spend that long in a car, it always gets all condensation-y regardless of whether or not you're smoking and talking in it. So we get in the car, I unlock the car. And again, it's only like a two minute drive to her place.
Otherworld
Episode 124: Off Trail
And we're kind of quiet, but I look up in the rear view and on the back in condensation was the word help. It was strange enough to make us take another lap around the neighborhood just talking about what is that?
Otherworld
Episode 124: Off Trail
and to be fair we were kind of laughing about it i think i even made the joke like i don't i don't know what steve is doing in his car like what the is that so that's pretty much where we left it uh just as a weird strange thing i dropped her off i even a couple days later i ended up driving her to the train to get back into the city.
Otherworld
Episode 124: Off Trail
So it wasn't something that was at the forefront of our minds whatsoever. A couple months go by and the semester's over. It was actually my last semester in Boston because my school had this thing where You could transfer to L.A. for a semester to work an internship and try to get some footing.
Otherworld
Episode 124: Off Trail
So my buddy and I, who I moved out here with, were planning on taking a big road trip after the Christmas break. He lived in Texas, so we had all these stops planned on the way. I knew it was going to be my last time on Long Island for a little bit. I ended up going over to her place New Year's Day. Another attempt at like clearing the air, another half-assed closure attempt. I don't know.
Otherworld
Episode 124: Off Trail
The next day we woke up. It was a cloudy day. It was already like it was lightly raining. Something felt off. And I kind of marked that up to the situation. And the rest of the morning went on. pretty much as usual. We were just hanging out, having coffee for a couple hours and trying to figure out what to do for the rest of the day.
Otherworld
Episode 124: Off Trail
Any time she would come back to Mandeville, she liked going on walks by herself now and going into different trails, going into new trails that she hadn't been to before. We were letting the afternoon drag on a bit. By the time noon, one o'clock rolls around, she's like, okay, so we going on a hike or not? We going on a walk or not?
Otherworld
Episode 124: Off Trail
And I had this distinct, you know, I'm, I can definitely be lazy, especially in the mornings, but I had this very distinct foot dragging feeling about the whole thing. And this, I now remember she said, regardless of whether or not you go, I'm going alone. And. Almost immediately I felt like, ah, that's, it didn't feel right. I was like, okay, yeah, fine, I'll go.
Otherworld
Episode 124: Off Trail
And she wanted to go to this place she'd only been to once before. It was actually a town over in Shirley, the Wertheim Nature Preserve. It was kind of a cloudy day. It wasn't really much of a day to go out and enjoy the outdoors. But it cleared up and by about three o'clock we drove over. We get there and it's, you know, it's a nice trail. There were maybe only
Otherworld
Episode 124: Off Trail
two or three other cars in the parking lot and it was one of those trails where you you know you enter at the exit it's basically just a big loop you could take different paths in so on our way in we saw multiple parties coming out so we pretty much figured we were the only people in the trail and what i what i thought was so weird was we both were kind of immediately creeped out.
Otherworld
Episode 124: Off Trail
A lot of me now wonders if some of this weird feeling that had been there since the beginning of the day, in hindsight, we kind of both marked it up to something along the lines of feeling watched. But we, you know, we kept going and The thing is, at this point, we got to the trail late and it's winter in the northeast. It's already fairly dark.
Otherworld
Episode 124: Off Trail
By the time we hit the, you know, kind of destination point of the trail, which is a little like rinky dink dock, I was already pretty eager to go. And, you know, all else aside, I just don't want to be out when it gets cold and dark. So we wrap around and take the loop back. I don't know whether it was just the time of day
Otherworld
Episode 124: Off Trail
or the fact that the woods were still crackling because it had rained recently, something about the air felt distinctly thin. The air felt like rarefied. It felt almost vibrational. And at this point, we were getting into the early stages of twilight. So we're wrapping back and, you know, again, still joking about how weird this whole thing feels.
Otherworld
Episode 124: Off Trail
She's walking maybe a couple feet ahead of me to my left. And the rest of the trail is kind of covered to me by woods. Like, I'm out of bend. My view is a little obscured. And the first thing she says is, oh, there's a person. And that was followed up by her saying, wait, Sean, what is that? And then...
Otherworld
Episode 124: Off Trail
what is that louder and more severe i go around the bend and i see this long skinny like luminescent it it almost didn't have a form at first it was in the center and looked more or less like a something bipedal I would guess it was something around 7 to 8 feet tall. That was my gauge when I saw it most plainly. It just looked like a long, skinny streak of light on two legs. No arms.
Shawn Ryan Show
#199 Tim Tebow - Fighting For Our Children
Sorry, I do get fired up about it. I do too, man.
Shawn Ryan Show
#199 Tim Tebow - Fighting For Our Children
I'm recording, so now I'm just going to say, hi, who wants to chat? I named myself Ashley Female New Jersey, 13 Female New Jersey. Let's see how many private messages come in. Two already, three.
Shawn Ryan Show
#199 Tim Tebow - Fighting For Our Children
Yep, hey, want to fool around? Hey, how old are you? Let me just copy that and send that to everybody because we got other messages coming in.
Shawn Ryan Show
#199 Tim Tebow - Fighting For Our Children
Just a teen chat, hey, you wanna cuddle a bit? I didn't, I mean, I'm giving them the benefit of the doubt right now that they didn't read the, oh, he's 47.
Shawn Ryan Show
#199 Tim Tebow - Fighting For Our Children
Oh yeah, there's a ton. I can't even keep up with them here because every time I click one, there's more on the list. I said, are you okay with my age? He says, yes, age 13, like my profile says. I got two more messages, so now we're at one, two, three, four, five. I'm 19, let's ignore the 19-year-old, even though it's disgusting.
Shawn Ryan Show
#199 Tim Tebow - Fighting For Our Children
There's another guy. Here's the other guy. This guy's 15. Ignore him. That is a real teenager in a teen chat. The 47-year-old says, he said age. I said 13 like my profile says. He said name, Ashley. And then another guy just messaged. How old are you? Okay, this person's a child too.
Shawn Ryan Show
#199 Tim Tebow - Fighting For Our Children
So out of all of these, there's one guy here who is 47 years old, less than a minute, who wants to talk to a child in a teen chat. And I only said hi in the chat room, nothing else.
Shawn Ryan Show
#199 Tim Tebow - Fighting For Our Children
Former MLB All-Star Sean Casey, a.k.a. the Mayor, keeps hitting it out of the park.
Shawn Ryan Show
#199 Tim Tebow - Fighting For Our Children
Follow and listen on your favorite platform.
Shawn Ryan Show
#199 Tim Tebow - Fighting For Our Children
I mean, the people that you're talking to.
Shawn Ryan Show
#199 Tim Tebow - Fighting For Our Children
We just cried laughing so long after that. I'm glad I'm not the only one that's messed this up.
Shawn Ryan Show
#199 Tim Tebow - Fighting For Our Children
Tim Tebow, welcome to the show, man. Thank you so much. Thank you for having me. And I also want to say thank you so much for your service.
Shawn Ryan Show
#199 Tim Tebow - Fighting For Our Children
I knew that you gave gifts, and so we have something for you. Oh, man. Thank you so much for this. I appreciate it. And your packaging is awesome. Thank you.
Shawn Ryan Show
#199 Tim Tebow - Fighting For Our Children
It is just such a special day. Well done. Well done.
The Dr. John Delony Show
My Husband and His Brother Got in a Fistfight Over Me
My father, who I haven't been super close with, is getting on in years. He's run into a lot of health problems. I'd have a lot more sympathy if it wasn't of his own doing. He hasn't taken care of himself from even the time when I was a kid. I can remember maybe two times that I saw my father run, but...
The Dr. John Delony Show
My Husband and His Brother Got in a Fistfight Over Me
the really hard thing is he's getting on in years and he's kind of reached out to me and kind of, uh, made it known. He expects me to take care of him. And I'm still trying to build a life and build a family for myself. But the thing that makes it really hard is that, um, his past. So my father is a convicted pedophile. Um, he's registered sex offender. And, um,
The Dr. John Delony Show
My Husband and His Brother Got in a Fistfight Over Me
I just see me taking care of him in the future, just blowing up this life that I've worked so hard to build. I mean, I've got a girlfriend right now and really happy and everything looks like it's going to be the best thing in the world. And I just, only two people in the world know about this. Like my two best friends that I look at as brothers.
The Dr. John Delony Show
My Husband and His Brother Got in a Fistfight Over Me
And my brother, unfortunately, is in and out of jail. And my mom is currently taken care of.
The Dr. John Delony Show
My Husband and His Brother Got in a Fistfight Over Me
his newly born son so she's wrapped up and she's doing great she's really really great woman saint honestly to deal with my dad for so long they're divorced now and she's remarried but it it's just so hard to like look at this man and see nothing that I can look up to or nothing I can admire and I look at my friends relationships with their fathers and brothers and I'm so jealous and I'm
The Dr. John Delony Show
My Husband and His Brother Got in a Fistfight Over Me
I just don't know what my taking care of someone who in society is looked at as the lowest of the low. It's hard for me to imagine. I don't know. What do you think?
The Dr. John Delony Show
My Husband and His Brother Got in a Fistfight Over Me
I have, and it started when I was younger, like, protecting it from my friends, and then I would make these good friends, and then one day, Taylor's, um... Robbie isn't going to be able to come over anymore. And it wasn't until I was a little bit older that I found out why I felt like I worked so hard and every step he's taken away things from me that are out of my control.
The Dr. John Delony Show
My Husband and His Brother Got in a Fistfight Over Me
And the one thing I can control is who I tell. Yeah.
The Dr. John Delony Show
My Husband and His Brother Got in a Fistfight Over Me
I don't think so. I think it's just, they found out he was on the registry and it's like, I really want to believe for like everything in my body that it was a one time or whenever that went down before I was born and it ended there. But his actions, he's like done other weird things. Like when I've had girlfriends, he's like,
The Dr. John Delony Show
My Husband and His Brother Got in a Fistfight Over Me
That's what I've always wanted.
The Dr. John Delony Show
My Husband and His Brother Got in a Fistfight Over Me
My biggest dream since I've been a man is to change my last name.
The Dr. John Delony Show
My Husband and His Brother Got in a Fistfight Over Me
I can't tell you the way you just left it off me.
The Dr. John Delony Show
My Husband and His Brother Got in a Fistfight Over Me
It makes... It's hard because one of the people I trust the most in the world, my friend, he's a similar family situation to me, but just different vices. And I look at him like a brother, and he's someone I look up to. And when I talk to him, he had a very different reaction. But he's a single guy. He's not a father like you. I feel like it's a different perspective.
The Dr. John Delony Show
My Husband and His Brother Got in a Fistfight Over Me
And I think when you're a father, you kind of see the danger more clearly. than anything else and I feel at the same time that you've given me given me the tools I need to move forward and not feel accountable for my father's sins and that's it yeah and can I tell you
The Dr. John Delony Show
My Husband and His Brother Got in a Fistfight Over Me
I've kept all of the women away from him since I've been a man on purpose. I can see the way he looks at them, and I just know I don't. You know what I call that?
The Dr. John Delony Show
My Husband and His Brother Got in a Fistfight Over Me
That's the thing. He's never been accountable.
The Dr. John Delony Show
My Husband and His Brother Got in a Fistfight Over Me
He got away with it. My mom stayed with him. Coward. He didn't go to jail. The family basically washed it all away for him. He's never had to deal with the consequences of his actions.
The Dr. John Delony Show
My Husband and His Brother Got in a Fistfight Over Me
Thanks. Okay. I've never had this conversation before. I don't know.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2214 - Shane Smith
There's been reports about this stuff on Twitter, but it's just like Twitter reports. I haven't seen anyone show pictures or quotes. It's just like a Twitter account saying stuff like that.
The Joe Rogan Experience
#2214 - Shane Smith
I think they made something so that they would know if it worked. If we're giving it this, as long as we see this at the end result, then success. Right. So I don't understand that.
The Ramsey Show
Draw a Line in the Sand and Say “I’m Done!”
Me and Dara, back in November, have a new son, a baby boy. We have $87,000 in debt. I've been in debt since I was like 18 years old.
The Ramsey Show
Draw a Line in the Sand and Say “I’m Done!”
Wake-up call. You know, open next 20 years. This is important. You know, we got to get this right.
The Ramsey Show
There’s Always a Way out of a Financial Spiral
Me and Dara, back in November, have a new son, a baby boy. We have $87,000 in debt. I've been in debt since I was like 18 years old.
The Ramsey Show
There’s Always a Way out of a Financial Spiral
Wake-up call. You know, open next 20 years. This is important. You know, we got to get this right.
The Ramsey Show
The Road to Financial Freedom Begins With Hard Choices
Me and Dara, back in November, have a new son, a baby boy. We have $87,000 in debt. I've been in debt since I was like 18 years old.
The Ramsey Show
The Road to Financial Freedom Begins With Hard Choices
Wake-up call. You know, over the next 20 years, this is important. You know, we gotta get this right.
The Ramsey Show
It’s Time to Stop Surviving and Start Taking Control
Hi, how are you doing? I recently quit my job making $80,000 a year to start my own business. And I'm just wondering, having a little self-doubt, wondering if it was a mistake or not.
The Ramsey Show
It’s Time to Stop Surviving and Start Taking Control
Well, I am a single-income family of four. I have two kids. And I'm the sole provider. My wife hasn't worked since she got pregnant with our first child 15 years ago. So this is kind of everything... on my shoulders type of deal.
The Ramsey Show
It’s Time to Stop Surviving and Start Taking Control
This would be my first time. No, no.
The Ramsey Show
It’s Time to Stop Surviving and Start Taking Control
For years, I've been saving towards this goal. I have about 80K saved up in an investment account and about 40K saved up in a savings account.
The Ramsey Show
It’s Time to Stop Surviving and Start Taking Control
No, I've paid off all three of my cars. We do not own a house we rent. I've rented the same house for 12 years and my rent has not moved. So I'm in a very good... Fantastic.
The Ramsey Show
It’s Time to Stop Surviving and Start Taking Control
That gives you a 12-month... Well, I also have three months of my bills paid ahead of time. before I quit, I went ahead and paid three months of rent, three months of insurance. Sean, what's the job that you're doing now? Yeah, what are you doing now? So I'm a diesel technician by trade. I work on heavy duty trucks and fleet services.
The Ramsey Show
It’s Time to Stop Surviving and Start Taking Control
I have regular customers who have dealt with me, you know, for years on the weekends and side work like that. Are they your current clients? I have to, I just, Thank you.
The Ramsey Show
Math Is Important but Behavior Change Is What Matters
Good, good. So my question is, my wife and I, we had a couple issues with the bank and our mortgage. And our mortgage rate is actually increasing to a point that it's... This is the second time it's increased. And it's getting to a point that the monthly payments are getting a little steep. And so... We do have about $35,000 in savings.
The Ramsey Show
Math Is Important but Behavior Change Is What Matters
Not sure if that's usable in this case, but not quite sure what to do next.
The Ramsey Show
Math Is Important but Behavior Change Is What Matters
Um, so it, it, it actually started out as a 30 year fixed. Um, we were at 3.8% and, uh, the bank called us a couple of days before closing and said, Hey, uh, we accidentally wrote up your loan documents for a stick built home and you guys have a manufactured home. So we're going to have to rewrite those. So they did. And we had to sign again and that was about a month's difference.
The Ramsey Show
Math Is Important but Behavior Change Is What Matters
So our rate went from 3.8 to four and a half. And then, um, Um, about a day before closing, they called and said, well, um, you know, our bank sells these mortgages and nobody wants to buy this one. So we're going to have to drop you guys again. But they had a third solution and my wife actually works for this particular bank.
The Ramsey Show
Math Is Important but Behavior Change Is What Matters
And part of the employee benefits package is they help you get into a first home. Okay. Which sounds good. Um, And so what they did is they said, okay, we'll go ahead and we'll get you guys a mortgage. We'll keep it at the 4.5%.
The Ramsey Show
Math Is Important but Behavior Change Is What Matters
And in two years, or excuse me, in three years, you guys can go ahead and refinance with us. We'll keep your rate and we'll lock you in for 30 years. It'll be great.
The Ramsey Show
Math Is Important but Behavior Change Is What Matters
And so it's the end of those three years now. And should have read the loan documents a little closer. They aren't going to keep the rate. It's actually going up 2%. Oh, man.
The Ramsey Show
Math Is Important but Behavior Change Is What Matters
So, I mean, we're still at the point that it's, you know, affordable.
The Ramsey Show
Math Is Important but Behavior Change Is What Matters
So we were paying $2,500 a month, and now it'll be $3,500 a month.
The Ramsey Show
Math Is Important but Behavior Change Is What Matters
Yeah, and so this is only good. What they did was they came back and said, hey, we did make a mistake in the beginning for you guys, so what we'll do is we'll only raise you 1% this year and then 2% next year, and we'll extend your loan for two years. I tell them to pound sand.
The Ramsey Show
Math Is Important but Behavior Change Is What Matters
I think so, yeah, because, you know... There's only one buyer at this bank that buys manufactured home loans, and they ended up being, you know, they were full at the time. They couldn't take any more loans. So that's what happened as well.
The Ramsey Show
Math Is Important but Behavior Change Is What Matters
You know, it looks like it, when I look at the estimate online, it says it's gone up about $100,000 from when we purchased it two years ago.
The Ramsey Show
Math Is Important but Behavior Change Is What Matters
So we only have two more years, and then we have to, that's it. The loan's matured, and we either need to refinance with them or with somebody else. I mean, do you love the house? Yes.
The Ramsey Show
You Have to Know Where You Are Financially to Know Where You're Going
Hey, guys. I'm currently an ultrasound tech, kind of functioning as a traveler, so I make pretty good money currently. I'm wondering if it's worthwhile to go back to physician's assistant school for two years and then career, like, $125,000 in debt to make a little more money long-term.
The Ramsey Show
You Have to Know Where You Are Financially to Know Where You're Going
So I'll probably make like $3,000 a week, so it's probably like $140 a year because I take some time off, so maybe a little less, but somewhere in that ballpark. So I make good money now, but if I was to go back and be a regular...
The Ramsey Show
You Have to Know Where You Are Financially to Know Where You're Going
person and not do the travel thing, I'd probably make $80,000 to $90,000, and I'm kind of tired of doing the travel thing, so I'd like to sit down in a spot for a while and keep traveling forever.
The Ramsey Show
You Have to Know Where You Are Financially to Know Where You're Going
Probably starting at like $110,000 and then have to go from there. Okay. Be my best guess.
The Ramsey Show
You Have to Know Where You Are Financially to Know Where You're Going
maybe I have no idea. I'd have to sit down and do the crunch numbers probably at least a year. I'd imagine at least like probably two years.
The Ramsey Show
You Have to Know Where You Are Financially to Know Where You're Going
Yeah. I don't own a home either. So that's the other thing I would like to own a home.
The Ramsey Show
You Have to Know Where You Are Financially to Know Where You're Going
Not the biggest. I mean, I really like my job currently. It's just more of, I guess, long-term, like what I can do when I'm 60, 65. Yeah.
The Ramsey Show
You Have to Know Where You Are Financially to Know Where You're Going
That's a specific university just because my degrees are old and there's not very many places I will accept my credits since they're so old.
The Ramsey Show
You Have to Know Where You Are Financially to Know Where You're Going
Yeah, I've checked quite extensively, and I have two bachelor degrees previously. They're just, my credits are so old, so if I applied to, like, say, Salt Lake, I'd have to take numerous classes over again, like chemistry, ochem.
The Ramsey Show
You Have to Know Where You Are Financially to Know Where You're Going
Correct. I'm totally with you. My options are limited to go back to school based upon my educational path and how distant it is as far as the medical field goes.
Watch What Crappens
#2710 RHOSLC S5E18: Let’s Talk About the Huzzzbands
I didn't even know what a circle jerk was until two weeks ago.
Watch What Crappens
#2710 RHOSLC S5E18: Let’s Talk About the Huzzzbands
But I think that sometimes you have to realize that when you're saying things on camera, then they live on camera and then they can be repeated.
Watch What Crappens
#2710 RHOSLC S5E18: Let’s Talk About the Huzzzbands
So, you know what? I already talked to you. I already apologized to you.
Watch What Crappens
#2710 RHOSLC S5E18: Let’s Talk About the Huzzzbands
The only other time I had a conversation this bad was when my son in Bogota told me that his roommate tried to cut his hair with just regular scissors in the room. The only time I had a conversation that was harder than this was when I had to tell Henry that Xbox Live was down.