Greg Gutfeld
Appearances
The Five
The Five 05-14-2025
It will never be flown. Would you fly a jet from Qatar? You got to take the whole thing apart. You have to take every single piece apart and look at it. We can't even build a plane. You think we can take it apart? It is a Boeing plane. You know what Greg is really saying to you? In your face.
The Five
The Five 05-14-2025
Shut up, Jesse. All right. Up next, Dems thought they could Febreze him away, but the stench of Biden lingers.
The Five
The Five 05-14-2025
And did he not even think it was strange that he should stay in the cabinet where he belongs? This is not actually about the Democrats. This is about the media. They are the rats in this story. They're like a member of the gang. In this case, it was the gang of the White House, the Democrat Party and the media.
The Five
The Five 05-14-2025
They're the member of the gang that is now narking on everybody else so they can get prosecutorial immunity so they don't go to jail. But the problem is, in this case, they're just trying to save their jobs. These books are coming out to protect them so they can start talking about, oh, listen to these shocking revelations. Biden will forget people's names. Is it? Dude, this is not shocking to us.
The Five
The Five 05-14-2025
We were talking about this, but they want you to buy into this is shocking. So you think that it was shocking to them? Like, yeah. Can you believe this stuff? No, no, no, no. We saw it. And so did you. You're lying. You're putting these books out to protect your hide. What did they lead with? The wheelchair story. That was supposed to be the big story.
The Five
The Five 05-14-2025
And why did they choose that as the big story? Because it was about the physical issue and not the mental issue. But we don't care if Joe Biden's in a wheelchair. Right. We don't care about that. That's not going to affect how he leads a country. The mental incapacity, the 25th Amendment stuff, that's what we cared about.
The Five
The Five 05-14-2025
That's what the media is worried about you finding out that they covered for that. The big question is, of course, if we are all on the same page about Joe's cognition, what does that say about his executive order? Since I don't know, you want to start with the I don't know what year you should start, but all the pardons should be negated. They should all be taken away.
The Five
The Five 05-14-2025
But this explains why the media did the expose now and not then, because they wanted this stuff to happen. Wasn't about Joe. It was about the whole Democratic piece that they were protecting. And now they could come out and go, hey, it's not us. It's not us. It's them. They're discussing. This is why the media is dead. DOA, it's over.
The Five
The Five 05-14-2025
You threw that picture up again of him with the celebrities. Biden? Yeah. Look how upset Morgan Freeman is.
The Five
The Five 05-14-2025
And the thing is, I mean, ideas are meant to reflect an idea. But what if the idea itself is toxic? Then the words become camouflage. That's why they don't say abortion. They say pro-choice because just the thought of it, of abortion, is so disgusting. You turn it into reproductive health care. Carville has a problem, though. He's cherry-picking the words pro-choice.
The Five
The Five 05-14-2025
When just like weeks ago, he was calling Trump supporters, Republicans, Nazis, that this was a return of the Third Reich. I don't know what's worse. This the the the deconstructionist rhetoric or his constant demonization. I don't think he had. I think he doesn't have anything to replace those words with. And it goes back to what, you know, Harold, you were meant to do.
The Five
The Five 05-14-2025
The problem the Democrats has is bottomless. There's no foundational principles anymore because when they looked at the things that Trump is for, they have to decide that they're against it. So if you're for law and order, you're against it. If you're for biology, you have to be against biology. If you're for security, the border, you have to be against that. What about fitness?
The Five
The Five 05-14-2025
What about protein? You have to be against that too. What about technological progress? Everything that we now stake as good, they have to be the opposite. So they have nothing to build on. Their entire party is now on quicksand. What can they believe? In a woke crouch.
The Five
The Five 05-14-2025
This is crazy because I grew up with a car like that. It was my, like, 76 Cutlass Supreme. It would just die at the freaking stop sign, and I'd have to start it up again. And then all of a sudden I'm sitting in cars now, and I'm going, like, what's wrong with your car? And nobody could explain it. Like, what is this? Why is it doing it?
The Five
The Five 05-14-2025
And then I go, like, aren't you going to need a new starter in, like, six months? I mean, it's like you're using the starter now ten times as much, and those things cost, like, $800. And they're made in China. Oh, God. Tell me about it. Harold loves China.
The Five
The Five 05-14-2025
It's time now for one more thing, Greg. Michael Loftus tonight. I should put up the thing. It's Gutfeld, Chael Sonnen, Tyrus, Emily Campagno. That's a great show. And remember, what did I miss? A new game show available now at Fox Nation. This is the final episode tonight. It's going to be great. Speaking of great, humans are great. Check this out.
The Five
The Five 05-14-2025
These were firefighters actually, like, pulled a little kitten out of a storm drain in Arizona. They heard the kitten's cries. There's the kitten. And they used a rope to hoist the kitten out. They named the kitten Riley after the firefighter who saved her and then ate the kitten as some ritual sacrifice for some evil Satan god.
The Five
The Five 05-14-2025
Not well. If they don't like this facility, there is a solution. They could take them into their homes. I mean, if you don't just pay lip service, do real service. You've got a sofa bed somewhere in your house. Take in one of these gangbangers or alleged rapists and murderers. Show them where your heart is. Hakeem. It's like I have to be honest here. I'm going to go purely superficial.
The Five
The Five 05-14-2025
He is the most unwell looking political leader out there. The guy looks like he hasn't slept since 1989. But the worst part is he has nothing to show for it. Like he's a great symbol for the Democrat Party. He looks tired. He's worn out. He's miserable, but he doesn't do anything. Now you compare that to Trump. or Vance, or Musk, or RFK, or Rubio.
The Five
The Five 05-14-2025
There's all this energy, yet they're rested and ready. They have a purpose. They've got foundational principles. They know what to do. And here, they're walking tall. The Democrats are the walking dead. And the reason is this. Trump is squatted in the house of common sense, and there's no room there for the Dems. They can't come home because they condemned what's in that house.
The Five
The Five 05-14-2025
They're like the college kid who renounces his capitalist parents and their heartless lifestyle. And so the parents cut him off. Where do you go? Where do you go? Well, you defend gangbangers. You defend trans athletes. You know, you martyr people who are criminals. Where the hell is Van Hollen? Did he go on tour? I mean, where is his wife beating bro?
The Five
The Five 05-14-2025
Like, remember how that was over all over the media every day and we were forced to cover it. And we knew the guy was a scumbag and also the gangbanger. And yet, you know, they're gone. They disappeared. It's like it never happened.
The Five
The Five 05-14-2025
You know what the Dems' problem is? They're in a woke crouch. Show them the crouch, Cheryl. Show them the crouch. That's when you're right.
The Five
The Five 05-14-2025
It's the dawn of a new Middle East. President Trump in Qatar for day two of his Mideast diplomatic blitz, putting commerce over conflict as he cuts more economic deals and courts peace. Donald the Dove lifting sanctions on Syria and meeting with their new president, urging him to sign on to the Abraham Accords with Israel. He also signaled some wiggle room for a new Iran deal.
The Five
The Five 05-14-2025
47 also securing a historic $1.2 trillion economic commitment in Qatar and complimented them on the decor.
The Five
The Five 05-14-2025
And as Trump racks up trillions in deals from the Gulf states, all the Dems and media want to do is hound the press over a luxury jumbo jet offer from Qatar.
The Five
The Five 05-14-2025
It's kind of funny. It's a funny story, Kennedy, although it does give them something to talk about because everything in this trip is a win. It's just deliverables. Everything one after the other is a win, win, win. Here, you play with the little story about the plane.
The Five
The Five 05-14-2025
You know, it's interesting, Dana. I was asked this question in the break. The other one, not that other one. He notices the camels and the marble. If they were to come here, what do you think they would notice?
The Five
The Five 05-14-2025
Hmm. Harold, it seems that this is kind of the way Trump always viewed this foreign policy, all commerce, no combat.
The Five
The Five 05-20-2025
Oh, Mary J. Lordy, there are excuses about seashells. Disgraced former FBI goofball James Comey is trying to shift blame from his shady 8647 post, one that sure looked like a veiled threat against President Trump. by blaming his wife. Isn't that sweet? And playing the old, aw shucks, I'm just a sweater wearing grandpa card. Give me a break.
The Five
The Five 05-20-2025
Greg, he is so full of hot toots. I'm choking on him all the way over here.
The Five
The Five 05-20-2025
Well, he's essentially a doctor, Jessica. So we're going to have to grant him that. I don't. The problem is I don't buy his excuse that it was innocent and they had no idea. And his wife thought it was someone's address. And he's like, well, no, it might be a political message. Like he's so clumsy and oafish. It's impossible for me to believe that any of this was an accident.
The Five
The Five 05-20-2025
Well, Joe Scarborough is in denial, and his words will come back to haunt him for as long as he is on the air, because he was the guy, and he's trying to kind of shellack it, gloss over it a little bit right now, give it a favorable finish, which...
The Five
The Five 05-20-2025
It feels so orchestrated because he has a book coming out and he knows this is going to get attention.
The Five
The Five 05-20-2025
isn't going to do any good because when you go back and look at the original tape he's like this is the best joe biden and he keeps going back to analysis like his analysis is spot on he is sharp he is fast and it's like no he was a withering vegetable who had real problems and everyone around him knew it and now they're all going on and off the record to a number of different authors we've got four books and counting about biden's cognitive decline
The Five
The Five 05-20-2025
Awkward egomaniac. Totally. You know, it's like his fibs are right up there with George Santos. And you know where he is. Well, up next, Bernie goes ballistic. The Krusty Kami is torching the Democrat Party. That'll be fun. That is next. I'm Alison Lundberg. No!
The Five
The Five 05-20-2025
Superdelegates, man. Bernie said it in 2016. He was railroaded by the superdelegates. They were baked into the cake. These were people who could vote any way they wanted. And Debbie Wasserman Schultz said that the reason the Democrat Party was set up the way it was was to make sure people like Bernie Sanders could not make it through the process and become the nominee.
The Five
The Five 05-20-2025
So why did they change the rules and get rid of superdelegates in 2018? Because Bernie was still very much a threat. And then in 2020... Well, guess what? Joe Biden was the nominee. Yes, because Jim Clyburn endorsed him at a very critical moment before the South Carolina primary. But guess who's back in the Democrat Party? Superdelegates. And you know what?
The Five
The Five 05-20-2025
Bernie Sanders used your party as long as it benefited him. And it made his name recognition massive. He was able to sell books. And now he's rich. And now the party doesn't mean anything to him anymore. He wants to be Mr. Authentic again, give AOC the mantle in his talking points. So he's burning the whole thing down because he's a commie.
The Five
The Five 05-20-2025
that tell the opposite picture of the magical interactions that Joe Scarborough and Joe Biden had, which, you know, all you had to do was look at Joe Biden every other second of the day to know that something was terribly wrong. The prostate cancer, the metastatic prostate cancer, that diagnosis is awful. And I wouldn't wish that on anyone.
The Five
The Five 05-20-2025
They don't have them in France. Yeah. Great point, Greg. Buy me some peanuts and crackers. Okay, but no one has talked about this. The French paparazzi, they're not like regular paparazzi. They're French people. You know, it's like they've got odd mores. They kill Diana. And they smell like camembert. That's right. And they just want to touch you constantly.
The Five
The Five 05-20-2025
Like, I don't blame him because it was so overly familiar and aggressive. And, you know, it's like he probably had groped Mr. Washington earlier down the line, and I will not stand for that.
The Five
The Five 05-20-2025
You know, it's terribly sad and concerning that a family has to deal with something like that. But they have managed to politicize it. And you have to think logic would dictate that they've known about that diagnosis for a long time. It is incredibly inconvenient for his post-presidency because the other post-presidencies have been very lucrative in modern history.
The Five
The Five 05-20-2025
And he will not get to enjoy that. And so it feels like they kind of put that news in there. to because they were bookended by the her tapes and, of course, the book that came out today, Original Sin. And they both draw a very damning portrait. So there are people who say, you know, like Sonny Hostin, like we can't make this about politics. It's like if this were Trump, it would be impeachment.
The Five
The Five 05-20-2025
It would be like impeach him for what he did, you know, 75 years ago. Impeach him for everything. It would be a full nuclear holocaust. So you can't have it both ways. It's either completely political and everything is on the table or the entire thing was a lie and we have to move on completely from the Democrat establishment.
The Five
The Five 05-20-2025
Hey there, it's me, Kennedy. Make sure to check out my podcast, Kennedy Saves the World. It is five days a week, every week. Download and listen at foxnewspodcast.com or wherever you listen to your favorite podcast.
The Five
The Five 05-20-2025
They have gotten addicted to protests. They've gotten addicted to drama. We all know that discussions like this that are so incredibly heated require adults who are going to employ some moderation. But LaMonica McIver knows that her name is not going to be mentioned anywhere if she sits down and has a conversation with Kristi Noem or Tom Homan in her office.
The Five
The Five 05-20-2025
And, you know, if you look at this and the body cam footage and there was a lot of video evidence here, it's very inconvenient for her because she is clearly not de-escalating the situation. And for these federal officers who have been trained to de-escalate, they've also been trained to read body language. And they know the intent of someone when they raise their forearm and elbows.
The Five
The Five 05-20-2025
All you have to do is listen to ludicrous Southern hospitality to know that when someone does this, they're about to drop bows on them. And that's a scary place to be if you're a federal officer, because you don't want to have to respond with force. But they have to move the conversation to this most dramatic point in order to get the one thing they crave so much, which actually fuels them.
The Five
The Five 05-20-2025
It's as though they've got solar panels on themselves. They need attention. They need chaos. They need drama. And none of that is helpful. None of that moves the conversation forward politically. And if they're really doing what they're supposed to be doing, then write laws in Congress, create a coalition and pass them if ICE needs to be reformed.
The Five
The Five 05-13-2025
And if you compare this again to the previous administration, that was lip service. This is real service. You know, Anything is possible with Trump. The Democrats never thought anything was possible. And I think I realized why. To them, winning the election is the job. For Trump, the job comes after the election.
The Five
The Five 05-13-2025
And I think that's when you when we're talking about Biden, they didn't care that he was barely alive because he already won.
The Five
The Five 05-13-2025
He's already a billionaire. There's none of these licensing deals have any bearing on him. And you want to talk about if you want to talk about Biden business deals and Trump business deals. One is transparent and one isn't. We know about the jet, the jet because he's not hiding it. We didn't know about the Burisma deal.
The Five
The Five 05-13-2025
Well, Hunter is no longer an artist. What was that? That business is gone. I know what the Trump family business is.
The Five
The Five 05-13-2025
You know what really helps average Americans across the country? If their children don't have to get sent off to a place where there are wars raging in the Middle East. This president has unfinished business from the first term, which is making sure more countries come into the Abraham Accords. And he talked about this extensively in his speech.
The Five
The Five 05-13-2025
As you mentioned, Jesse, exporting technology, not terrorism, commerce, not chaos. People from all religions and creeds building cities together, not bombing each other out of existence. So he's bringing technology. Peace to the region by bringing business to the region. And you've seen this happening with the negotiations they had with Saudi Arabia.
The Five
The Five 05-13-2025
He talked about the UAE, how they're building up. He then contrasted that with Iran, who he explained has destroyed their economy because all they do is export terrorism. And he gave them a choice. So he's trying to bring more countries into this.
The Five
The Five 05-13-2025
He also said that he wanted Saudi Arabia to come into the Abraham Accords, which is really code for saying you need to normalize with Israel so you guys can share technology and we can all get along and fight your real enemies and not be trying to get inside these wars all the time. So that will help the region. It will help. families in that region.
The Five
The Five 05-13-2025
It will also help the American people and the entrepreneurial spirit we have to work with other countries around the world to export our technologies and to work together. So I thought it was really interesting.
The Five
The Five 05-13-2025
And if he's going to bring people into the fold through commerce and discussion, while also allowing them to have their own cultures and do their own thing, then I think that would be good for the country and for the world.
The Five
The Five 05-13-2025
Well, the old guard is crushing the youth rebellion. David Hogg is in danger of losing his position as DNC vice chair after a panel voted to void the activist election to the position. Hogg isn't taking the news lightly.
The Five
The Five 05-13-2025
He fired off a statement saying there are too many leaders in the Democratic Party that are sleep at the wheel and added, quote, it is impossible to ignore the broader context of my work to help reform the party, which loomed large over this vote. The 25-year-old rabble-rouser recently went wild on 84-year-old Congressman James Clyburn for complaining about his quest to kick out the elderly.
The Five
The Five 05-13-2025
So, Marie, why is it that Democrats again are nullifying another election? Just one after the other, the party of democracy.
The Five
The Five 05-13-2025
Dana, David Hogg gets in, but he is breaking the rules. The DNC has rules about not getting involved in primaries.
The Five
The Five 05-13-2025
No, he didn't. So his job is an unpaid volunteer, and it's sad when you're going to get fired for something like that. It's like being banned from a public park. Something I know about. You know, here's the thing. I'm going to be nice to this guy because I want to see if he really has balls. You know, he's seen how his party views men.
The Five
The Five 05-13-2025
And we've talked about it on this show many times at the party. Black men, Hispanic men, white men. They're all leaving because they realize this is they don't like to be somewhere where they're not wanted. And he aptly assessed this in Bill Maher when he said he was tired of being judged and criticized for everything. And that guys just want to have fun. Young people just want to have fun.
The Five
The Five 05-13-2025
Well, come on over, Dave. The water is warm. It's like at a certain point, you know, you're going to have to, like, decide, like, if they don't really want you here, maybe it's time for you to go. The problem with this party. is that they eat each other alive. The identity politics just forces you in this power structure. And the first meal, the first breakfast, is the white guy.
The Five
The Five 05-13-2025
That's the first one to go. So he's going to be eaten alive. He's the one that they're going to kick out. So you might as well just leave. But don't bring your lefty politics with you.
The Five
The Five 05-13-2025
So, Jesse, should we bet on how long it takes David Hogg to go MAGA? Maybe he'll be wearing a red hat soon. They like dudes in MAGA. That's interesting.
The Five
The Five 05-13-2025
I think that Brett Hume would love to just retire, but they won't let him because our audience loves him. And so do I. All right. Head Sean Duffy is slamming Joe Biden and Pete Buttigieg for ignoring the warning signs at America's airports.
The Five
The Five 05-13-2025
Joe Biden's creaky brain wasn't the only piece of aging infrastructure the Democrats were ignoring. Faulty air traffic control equipment causing chaos at Newark Airport, and Transportation Secretary Sean Duffy ripping into the previous administration for missing the warning signs.
The Five
The Five 05-13-2025
It used to be in real world. But that's another story, Katie. If you look at how much the previous administration had neglected like these major problems from the border to Biden, it's not a stretch to assume they blew off fixing, you know, our travel hubs.
The Five
The Five 05-13-2025
Well, they had to make sure that they marked all the boxes for how you were able to hire people to fix these problems. So if you didn't check up all the right boxes, they couldn't hire you. You couldn't get started. This is a huge problem for Newark Airport. And this is just one of many, many airports around the country that could have these major problems.
The Five
The Five 05-13-2025
A lot of them have the same kind of software. And I learned the other day that we've only built three new airports since the 1950s. We've expanded other airports. As the United States of America, we've only built three. new airports, that seems like a big problem. There's also issues with union labor and costs that hold everything up. So they've got a big problem on their hands.
The Five
The Five 05-13-2025
And I hope that the people with the technology, Doge, Silicon Valley, folks can come in and get this fixed because people are freaked out and they say it's safe to fly. But when you say air traffic control is down, people are a bit scared given what we've seen the last six months.
The Five
The Five 05-13-2025
Yeah, Marie, where did the one point two trillion go to fix those racist roads, those bigoted bridges?
The Five
The Five 05-13-2025
Might I use a sports analogy on you? Imagine an NFL team goes zero in 17 and it gets sold. Now, the new owners are required to turn the team around, but don't blame them for the previous team going 0-17. That's where this administration is. They're taking over a losing team. That's their job to fix it, but they've got a big project.
The Five
The Five 05-13-2025
At Newark, I've had some experiences. Yeah. It's pretty bad at Newark, at least.
The Five
The Five 05-13-2025
You know, Jessie, Sean Duffy, obviously a veteran of real world San Francisco. How does the experience from being on real world San Francisco translate into this job?
The Five
The Five 05-13-2025
Yes, I need some trauma leave after listening to you. That made no sense at all.
The Five
The Five 05-13-2025
Hey, it's good for your immune system. I myself have swam in the Potomac. I didn't get Potomac. It's probably just as bad as this creek. And I have a friend named Corey and he ate a raw clam once from the bowels of the Potomac. He survived. So I think it's okay. It's all right.
The Five
The Five 05-13-2025
You know, we asked him to drain the swamp, not swim in it. But at least he has all his vaccinations. I love this guy. He's what we used to call in the old days an eccentric. You know, he's lived like 12 lives at once. You know, he doesn't drink anymore, but he didn't quit drinking. The alcohol quit him. It was like, I can't take this guy. He's too crazy.
The Five
The Five 05-13-2025
What's worse, having kids swimming in a creek or on an iPhone all day or an iPad? This is not as bad.
The Five
The Five 05-13-2025
Yes, I will. Anyway, tonight we have a great show, and you know why? Sherrod Small's on. He hasn't been on. I haven't seen him in 12 years.
The Five
The Five 05-13-2025
Never mind Brian Kilmeade, Tyrus, and Emily Capagno, but this is going to be very interesting. I hope Sherrod Small's on his best behavior. All right. Also, what did I miss? Available now on Fox Nation. Brent Hume says it's the best show on television. I'm Joel. What did I miss? I'm Joel Gregg. I thought of my good friend Juan Williams. Let's do this.
The Five
The Five 05-13-2025
A lot of people don't realize that Governor J.B. Pritzker loves to go swimming. You know, it's his form of fitness. There he is enjoying a lovely dive into the water at the Milwaukee Zoo. He looks like he fell asleep underwater. Governor Pritzker works so hard, you know, going up and down stairs. It just tires him out. Yeah, he's fat. We call him J.B. Back Ribs. Yeah.
The Five
The Five 05-13-2025
All right. If you're flying JetBlue anytime soon, you might want to bring your sweet tooth because America's not just running on Dunkin', it's flying it now, too. JetBlue just rolled out a new plane with a full Dunkin' makeover, bright pink, orange, and coffee-themed. Of course, nothing says high altitude like a caffeine high. No word yet if they're handing out Boston Donuts.
The Five
The Five 05-13-2025
Yeah. You know what I mean? That matters at this point. I love that they thought that he needed a wheelchair if he won. Apparently he wouldn't need one if he didn't win. No, they just didn't care. They didn't care about his health at all. They just worried about the optics that he would need a wheelchair if he won. I am tired of these books. They should have watched the five.
The Five
The Five 05-13-2025
They should have watched Fox. We were doing the reporting in real time. Not right now. The books are now just an admission of guilt. The Dems can never bring up the 25th Amendment ever again. Even if Trump's brain is in a vat in the Oval Office running the country, we're going to say, oh, no, no, no. He's sharp as a tack. But there's this other thing about the media's excuse, which is killing me.
The Five
The Five 05-13-2025
The White House was lying to us. Well, duh. That's to be expected. It's called spin. Your job is to assume that they're not telling you the truth. You're a journalist. You just don't go, oh, they say Joe's fine. Nothing to see here. I mean, you should offer a little bit more resistance, you know, than Facebook asking if you're 18. You know, that's how bad it is. So it's not about the media.
The Five
The Five 05-13-2025
It's not about Joe's condition. At all. Nobody cares at this point. It's the media's condition. There are two diagnoses. One, you're the dumbest, most incompetent generation of journalists ever on the planet. Or two, you deliberately covered up Joe's dramatic decline because you're biased. That is all you have. There's no there's no in between.
The Five
The Five 05-13-2025
I would say if I were them, I would come clean and go, you know what? We knew Biden was a mess. It was obvious. But as Democrats, we preferred him over this existential threat known as Donald Trump. And they had called him Hitler, which meant. Anytime they criticized Biden, they would get grief for helping Hitler.
The Five
The Five 05-13-2025
So they couldn't actually be honest or else that would be seen as somehow doing something horrible. But the media, Biden's still alive. The media is dead. You know, put a tag on their toe, call Quincy, shove the body in a fridge because the corpse, it's starting to reek.
The Five
The Five 05-13-2025
Do you know this is one of those points where George Clooney or a celebrity could actually say, do you know who I am?
The Five
The Five 05-13-2025
Okay, they are still so afraid of just speaking the truth about what happened that they're not willing to come out on the record on this when everybody could see what was going on. Nobody was courageous. George Clooney wasn't courageous. Barack Obama wasn't courageous. Nancy Pelosi wasn't courageous. Democrats had a choice. They could have had a primary.
The Five
The Five 05-13-2025
And instead of having a primary, they were running around suing RFK Jr. and Dean Phillips, trying to keep them off of ballots.
The Five
The Five 05-13-2025
So they lost the opportunity on two primaries on the front end and on the back end. They lost to so much for democracy. They were all fine with this because they wanted Joe Biden to stay in office because he was an empty vessel. They were allowed to push through whatever they wanted. We still have no answers about who is actually making these decisions.
The Five
The Five 05-13-2025
We don't even have a lot of information still on the day that he dropped out and posted his resignation letter for the campaign on Twitter. We don't have very much information about that. So this is about a lack of trust. And for Jake Tapper to come out now and say, oh, well, the White House was lying. Well, so were you. And CNN covered a presidential election.
The Five
The Five 05-13-2025
And you don't think that it was pertinent to the American people and important for them to know about all of these details. And now all of a sudden that these anonymous sources and people are willing to talk about it, they want to pat on the back for saying what was obvious. We have more details now, but this was happening.
The Five
The Five 05-13-2025
And for now them to say the doctor was recommending there may need to be a wheelchair for the second term. Let's not forget they never made the White House doctor available for questioning, not a single time. Do you think there will be a congressional hearing?
The Five
The Five 05-13-2025
Yes, I was a little worried about that because he also has the mobile McDonald's. Yes. So it makes you wonder what meat they're using. They never rolled out the red carpet for Joe Biden because they were worried about the cleaning bill. But, you know, it's interesting. So he has this mobile McDonald's following him.
The Five
The Five 05-13-2025
It's just like a regular McDonald's, except the Hamburglar is missing a hand for stealing.
The Five
The Five 05-13-2025
They do that there. I think you're right. You know, this is a great week. It's only Tuesday because it says a lot about the mindset. With Trump, it feels like almost anything is possible because he's a doer. He's not a talker. He's a man of action. He's got aspirational designs for the country. He wants to be the greatest president ever. And that directly benefits us.
The Five
The Five 05-13-2025
Even if it's for his own ego, it doesn't matter. They align properly with our needs. He's America's lawyer, America's agent. He's in the room on our behalf. Doesn't seem like an existential risk to me, Marie, but maybe you see it differently. And he doesn't care what the world thinks. That's a liberal thing. Successful people do not care what other people think or else they'd never be successful.
The Five
The Five 05-15-2025
That never mattered before. They kind of worked together and they were immune from criticism. They could say whatever they wanted. It was fine. For some reason, it's no longer working. They're getting very desperate. The Democrats are not buying it from that guy. They're not going to. They know they've run out of impeachment chips. They're done.
The Five
The Five 05-15-2025
And to use that same analogy, the media bet put all their chips on black, which was the Biden cover up, and they lost. So there's none of this stuff is actually working. And they keep going further and further to this irrational edge where at some point, because the earth is flat, they're going to fall off.
The Five
The Five 05-15-2025
You know, this is bigger than Watergate. Yeah, it is. This makes Watergate look like a parking ticket. We don't need to move forward. We have to move backwards. There was this other tidbit. Cabinet members believe the president could not be relied on to respond to a crisis at night. That means when Biden was president, he was pure 25th Amendment president. material. How do we know this?
The Five
The Five 05-15-2025
We found out on May 15th, 2025, a year or two, maybe longer after the fact. So this book isn't telling on Joe. Joe's pathetic and sad. It's telling on itself. You know, when does information become so urgent that you don't save it for your stupid book? If this were Trump, if any of this information were about Trump, they
The Five
The Five 05-15-2025
While this was happening, Trump wasn't even president, and they were saying he was an existential risk. He was a threat to democracy. While they were saying Trump was a threat to democracy, they had an incapacitated president that they were covering up for. It's insane. This story...
The Five
The Five 05-15-2025
is so big that I believe the books are designed to kind of let the air out of it and just, like, let's get past this. We can't let them do this. We can't. This is a huge deal. We were lied to. Look, did you hear about, like, they were doing fake cocktail parties for Kamala Harris? And get this. Because they were worried that she couldn't handle a cocktail party because she drank.
The Five
The Five 05-15-2025
We talked about her being drunk all the time. They were doing these dry runs because they thought she was an alcoholic.
The Five
The Five 05-15-2025
Democrats having a meltdown in Congress. Fresh off his sewage swim, HHS Secretary RFK Jr. was back in the swamp battling purple haired clowns on the hill and a socialist ice cream man.
The Five
The Five 05-15-2025
Well, then so has your legitimacy. Oh, wow. The lady with the purple hair, Dana. Yeah. She reminds me of one of the evil villains in Scooby-Doo. Do you remember the cartoon? Yeah, yeah, yeah.
The Five
The Five 05-15-2025
Yeah, Jesse, they should come up with a new flavor. Marble fudge meltdown. You know what I'm saying?
The Five
The Five 05-15-2025
Yeah, Kellyanne, you mentioned this before. They just seem, they're all miserable. Whose side do you want to be on? The happy people or the weirdos?
The Five
The Five 05-15-2025
You know how they could come up with it? They'd have to take a sample of Harold's blood and put it in.
The Five
The Five 05-15-2025
You're the only sensible Democrat left, Harold. There are a few more. Yeah, but they're not talking. That's for sure. All right. What am I saying? Coming up, Starbucks baristas roast their dress code.
The Five
The Five 05-15-2025
Thanks, Trump. All right. Tonight, we've got a great show. Joe DeVito, Katie Pavlich, Emily Campagno, Tyrus. That's tonight at 10. Let's do this. When I want to see fashion, I go to the Metro Richmond Zoo, because that's where the Metro sexuals hang out. Check out this model. His name's Patrick. He's 34. He's an orangutan.
The Five
The Five 05-15-2025
They gave him a cloak for his birthday, and he wrapped it around himself, but he tied it in a perfect knot. Even Hillary Clinton was like, wow, you tie a good knot. Can you meet me at a local prison? I need to hang somebody.
The Five
The Five 05-15-2025
Yeah. It's interesting. Why does the world respond to Trump in a way that confuses Western media? It's because the world wants what he has and the media doesn't. They understand aspirational goals. Like you said to them, Trump is a possibility machine. If you're going to meet him, you better meet him because you never know what you might get out of him.
The Five
The Five 05-15-2025
But there was no sense of hope with the Democrats. Not when your hood ornament was a decomposing bureaucrat. What what were you going to get out of that? I'm old enough to remember when the media was telling us Trump was a global terrorist. Laughing stock might have been a few weeks ago, I think. Now they're giving him jets before they were giving Joe Biden transfusions.
The Five
The Five 05-15-2025
Doesn't seem that people are treating him like a laughing stock. They're legitimately excited. They are alive around Trump. So it's another one of the media lies. We're sick of talking about the media's lies. But you've got to ask, is the media sick of their constant losing? Their framework, their framing, which they use to perceive reality, keeps leading them to defeat.
The Five
The Five 05-15-2025
Every day they think something's going to happen and it doesn't happen. TDS is a lousy filter to perceive life. The election, trade, immigration, the Maryland man. You know, every single issue, the Dems are ritually humiliated. And it's because of their filter. For Trump, doing big things is easy because we aren't stuck reinventing basic principles. You know, he says, let's work on a peace deal.
The Five
The Five 05-15-2025
Let's get rich. It's not let's push trans awareness in Malaysia. You want a laughingstock? You know, the world's greatest country was going around the world questioning biology. These countries don't have the luxury or the time for that. They want peace and prosperity, not drag queen story hour. We were the laughingstock under Biden. And now it's all back to normal. They understand winning.
The Five
The Five 05-15-2025
So my advice to Dems is if you see somebody winning a lot. You've got to ask yourself, what does that person have that you don't have? That's how you learn. You run into people your entire life and you wonder, man, they got it figured out. It's one thing you look at Trump. He's got it figured out. They see it. We see it. Those are the people that should guide you.
The Five
The Five 05-15-2025
The problem with the Dems is they're just delusional assessment of Trump. Can't explain his success. And they also can't predict it. So they pin their hopes every morning waking up that he's going to fail. And every morning they're disappointed and they get more miserable and they get more desperate. I don't see any hope for that.
The Five
The Five 05-15-2025
Greg, happy TDS Thursday. Why, thank you. You're welcome. Did you get me anything? Not yet. All right. I only like ointments. Again... Trump is annexed the territory of common sense and you have the Dems outside looking in and they're convinced that it's just better to keep moving left than it is to just come join the fun, join the party because they hate Trump so much.
The Five
The Five 05-15-2025
And they're getting it by doing that. As you see with Springsteen, who is a pussy for doing that in another country and not doing it in America? He is a... I already said it. Yes. Yes. The View, I watch it so you don't, actually criticized Trump's plan to slash drug prices. We knew that would happen, that no matter what Trump does that's good, they're going to say it's evil.
The Five
The Five 05-15-2025
So what was their reasoning? He didn't say specifically what drugs would be reduced, and then he called them fat. Could you imagine a host making fun of somebody's weight like that? Just absolutely disgusting what pigs they are. But, you know, the standard criticism of the Democrats, the left and the media together, one big glump is that they're out of ideas or in denial. They're dishonest.
The Five
The Five 05-19-2025
As long as you pit one group against the other, they won't look up at you. And this is how the Democrat Party survives, is they want everybody to fight each other over their rights. specific group rather than fight over an idea, because once you look at the ideas, you leave the party. Right.
The Five
The Five 05-19-2025
I'm just getting word from the producers. Tim Waltz has staged for jazz hands. Oh, wow.
The Five
The Five 05-19-2025
Fox News alert. Trump reacting just moments ago to the shocking cancer diagnosis of former President Joe Biden. Watch.
The Five
The Five 05-19-2025
Meanwhile, Democrats are ripping President Trump's big, beautiful bill after it cleared a hurdle in a late night vote and poised for a larger vote on Wednesday.
The Five
The Five 05-19-2025
I made a very simple case that the Republican budget is not going to help working class folks.
The Five
The Five 05-19-2025
So, Harold, the Dems think this is a terrible bill, but they think it's a terrible bill for the wrong reason. It's not a great bill because we're in a fiscal crisis and we aren't acting like it. We need to cut, cut, cut. And I think we're adding two point five trillion to the debt. Is that correct? I think it's a little more than that. That's what the forecast.
The Five
The Five 05-19-2025
All right, Bernie Sanders. So, Katie, there is no tax on tips. I mean, I don't think that's helping billionaires and trillionaires.
The Five
The Five 05-19-2025
Thank you, Howard. It's your daily worker over here. Up next, President Trump smacks the boss around.
The Five
The Five 05-19-2025
Yes. I think they should be flown to El Salvador. I don't know about these people being paid because they don't seem like they need the money. They're into the status and the relevance, you know, to feel important without actually putting in the work. I said this again is another example of an opinion being assigned. There's no difference in Springsteen's opinion from a Larry David or a Tim Walz.
The Five
The Five 05-19-2025
They're all the same things that have been said about Trump. It's assigned to them. It's not original. I think, and Springsteen has a huge fear, that if he were to meet Trump, he would like him, agree with him, and they would get along. Because that is what happens every time a rapper, a comedian, an actor meets Trump.
The Five
The Five 05-19-2025
It forces you to release these assigned opinions that you've been carrying around like rocks in your head. It sucks. But maybe put your ego aside. If you have these strong feelings about this guy and you're willing to talk about him on foreign soil, go to the White House like Bill Maher did.
The Five
The Five 05-19-2025
Well, this is deceptively edited because we left out the part where Macron comes in and goes, I dare you to pull my finger. And then he pulls his finger and then you hear the loudest fart you've ever heard. They literally had to clear the room. It was disgusting. It was so bad. Macron's wife got up and left, but not before giving Erdogan a good right hook.
The Five
The Five 05-19-2025
Thanks, Shelly. Tonight, we've got a great show. Guy Benson, Julie Banderas, Jim Norton, Kennedy. That's tonight. Hey, let's do this. In your face, Harold. Yeah, Harold. You don't have a nickname. Well, this Harold, the Chihuahua, is known as Handsome Harold. He is. For a Chihuahua, that's a 10. He's so cute. You know, he was adopted at Fawn's Small Dog Rescue.
The Five
The Five 05-19-2025
It's really nice when you hear about a 10-year-old Chihuahua being adopted. He enjoys relaxing, much like you, Harold. And he bonds with people quickly, unlike you, Harold.
The Five
The Five 05-19-2025
I thought so. Yeah, that's right. I skateboard holding orphans. Wow. I don't skateboard. What do you think? What do you do, Sandra?
The Five
The Five 05-19-2025
He did not develop it in the last 100, 200 days. He had it while he was president. He probably had it at the start of his presidency in 2021. Yes, I don't think there's any disagreement about that.
The Five
The Five 05-19-2025
When they say something like that, you have to believe that that's the reason why they're breaking the news now. So you do mute and you do pause. The timing is telling you that this cancer is being used as a tool to deflect from outrage to sympathy. But get this normal human beings. We can have both. We can feel sad for somebody who has cancer.
The Five
The Five 05-19-2025
Like Harold said, we all know people intimately who are who have cancer, who are dying from cancer and who will die of cancer. So we could feel sad, but that's not going to infringe on the space in my brain that is reserved and dedicated to this cover up of his incapacitation. So you're not going to get a mute or a pause for me. But nice try.
The Five
The Five 05-19-2025
The cut this, you know, this we're talking about, like, how could this happen? We've always been saying about all of these problems in the last eight years. How did this happen? How did this happen? How did this happen? I say eight years because this has been going on before Biden was president. The neglect is on purpose.
The Five
The Five 05-19-2025
You know, we, for example, just focus on Joe Biden, the elder abuse line that we kept hearing. Why did it continue? Because Joe was docile and fragile and offering no resistance to any part of the progressive agenda.
The Five
The Five 05-19-2025
Joe's dysfunction may have been caused not by disability, but by debility, meaning he was worn down on purpose, deliberately kept feeble and weak, which made him pliable like a POW, except the W stands for White House. Joe's dysfunction was. was not prevented when it could have been because it kept him easily managed. He was always tired. He probably didn't want to answer questions or sign things.
The Five
The Five 05-19-2025
So we've seen a series of colossal blunders and deliberate cover-ups. All are ethically indefensible. All you can do if you're doing this stuff is tell yourself, consider the alternative. And the alternative to them was always Trump. That was their narrative. Like they can cover up this guy who is physically and mentally feeble because look at the other guy. It's Trump.
The Five
The Five 05-19-2025
So Trump is an existential threat. That narrative became justification for every kind of immoral behavior, including allowing violence, the implosion of a border, cover-ups, blatant, blatant illegal activity, siding with gangbangers. Up to now, Hamas sympathizes. You can approve of anything if you sell people the belief, you assign the opinion that Trump is an existential risk.
The Five
The Five 05-19-2025
It seems to me, Jessica, this debate doesn't end at all, but it is briefly put on pause as a result of today's news.
The Five
The Five 05-19-2025
Yeah, I guess I could talk about Tim Walz. Why do people like Walz only communicate through commencement addresses, right? Not podcasts. It's because they can only recite their boilerplate opinions individually. in arenas where there's no risk of a follow-up question. It's like J.D. Vance just mopped the floor with him when he actually was faced with someone asking him stuff.
The Five
The Five 05-19-2025
The moment you say, what do you mean by that? Or do you have proof that they're like the Gestapo? They will implode. This is why lefties always get all the commencement addresses and they love to spout their opinions on award shows because they know there's no journalist there that will ask them a question. And the reason why... And he's the perfect example.
The Five
The Five 05-19-2025
None of their opinions are actually real. They are all assigned. So he has he has there's just a folksy glibness. But underneath it, there is nothing. And they never have to have that challenge because the people around them never say, hey, what do you mean by that? There is no contemplation. You can always tell when somebody is telling you something that is not their own opinion.
The Five
The Five 05-19-2025
You do it all the time, Jesse. You know what's a perfect example? A perfect example is like me insulting Nickelback. And I've never heard their songs, but I make fun of Nickelback, but it's only because I've heard other people make fun of it. That's an assigned opinion. You look at Hillary. She uses the phrase, what was it? I wrote it down here.
The Five
The Five 05-19-2025
Handmaiden to the patriarchy, which I think she means she's bashing Monica Lewinsky. I'm not sure. But this only is appealing to an ever shrinking circle of feminist women, the same who bow to the altar of trans men and keep silent when real women are victimized by really bad men. But again, it's another assigned opinion that's lazily presented men against women, whether it's race or gender.
The Five
The Five 05-16-2025
I just like annoying her. That's who should go to the cracker barrel because their porch needs an aging rocker. Thank you so much for that. Yeah. Trump's like a like a pound of pastrami. He's on a roll. It really is about your filter. Trump's filter is anything is possible in this world. What's the Democrat filter? Everything's happening to you. It's their fault.
The Five
The Five 05-16-2025
That's where identity politics came from. You're being oppressed. It's not fair. Nothing's fair. You can't do anything about it. Bruce Springsteen goes around the world and tells everybody, Trump is doing something to you. That he hops in a plane and he leaves. What do those people do? There's nothing they can do. He's screwed up their mindset. He's telling them they're basically victims.
The Five
The Five 05-16-2025
Springsteen I don't want to get into that situation where you go after a celebrity because he says something you disagree with. Because you're a hypocrite. If you like Kid Rock because he's pro-Trump and you don't like Springsteen because he's pro-Biden, that's wrong. What you can hit him for is being lame. Right? Number one, he's doing this in England.
The Five
The Five 05-16-2025
Number two, he's doing it in a way where there are no follow-up questions to whatever he's saying. And the best thing about this is that he just creates more rebels. Like, this guy... used to rail against the man, and every time he opens his mouth, he is the man. Everybody looks at him and goes, God, you know what? The people that he doesn't like are actually more fun.
The Five
The Five 05-16-2025
These young people that he's, like, mad about, some of them might be his fans. They're having a great time. He's now the old guy on the lawn, shaking his rake at a cloud. His voice is raspy. He looks like, well, I'll just leave it at that.
The Five
The Five 05-16-2025
Perhaps they're non-binary. How dare you? By the way, yeah, you're the whole binary choice thing. I wish it was treated as binary. But you have the media involved when the media is involved in any election. There is no binary choice. It's either, you know, Hitler or. Or not Hitler. And that's and so that's why the Dems and the media are in the same sinking boat.
The Five
The Five 05-16-2025
But I think it's worse for the media. And I'll tell you why. It's the Democrats job to protect their guy, even if the guy's losing his mind. So that means they're going to lie and they're going to spin. And we get it. It's dirty. It's ugly. But that's what they do because it's their team. The media revealed their corrupt allegiance in all this. You know, Joe Biden isn't their team.
The Five
The Five 05-16-2025
They betrayed their profession. There's nothing binary about this. They were on the other side. So in one respect, the media is dead. And I will say this every single day. They're dead. Bury them, cremate them, do whatever you want. Scatter them over a field. But don't cremate them. Dems are in a bind. Because this is going to be a huge story and it should remain a huge story.
The Five
The Five 05-16-2025
It's the biggest political scandal in history. And each Democrat is going to have to answer for it. There's only two answers. One, you know, I did know what was going on and I lied and I didn't say anything or I didn't know what was going on because I'm stupid. So which one is it going to be? And it's not just one day. You got to answer for like January 6th. It's every day since then.
The Five
The Five 05-16-2025
So there needs to be hearings because if there's no hearings, then the the cover up is ongoing. So you have it. The cover up didn't die when Biden lost any more than a crime is no longer investigated because they nabbed the suspect on a different charge. The crime was still committed.
The Five
The Five 05-16-2025
No, you know, you have to ask, OK, why was he shocked by the by their kindness? Well, you were living in a bubble in which there was a phantom evil, which led you to believe that these were all mini Hitlers. When you're living that life, you assume that these people are monsters. And now we're all we aren't surprised. We know those people. You don't.
The Five
The Five 05-16-2025
He was like the equivalent equivalent of like a old. news anchor heading to Woodstock to see what all this fuss is about this crazy rock music. The sentiment of the left created the appeal of Trump. You know, Trump didn't become punk rock. The critics made him punk rock by amplifying his danger and his risk, which is appealing to young men. And then these guys come off as stiffs.
The Five
The Five 05-16-2025
Trump is basically, to use another musical analogy, he's the 2025 version of heavy metal music of the 1980s. And they're all
The Five
The Five 05-16-2025
tipper gore remember tipper gore yeah a little what were those things called that they put on the cds the warning label parental advisory i knew that one just not the not the richards uh martha well i think you know young men come in all stripes uh depending on their politics but i think it's sad that we live in this world now where people get judged before you're before you meet them
The Five
The Five 05-16-2025
Oh, I do. That's like a flying. That's a flying dream. Yeah, it's a flying dream. And you're so happy when you wake up. It's the best. And then you realize you're just a white guy.
The Five
The Five 05-16-2025
Oh, my gosh. Yes. Greg. By the way, I always wake up in a foreign place, and I have to do the five, and I don't know where I am.
The Five
The Five 05-16-2025
I can't get there, and I have, like, dirty clothes, and there's blood all over the place.
The Five
The Five 05-16-2025
Wait, that really happened. One more thing's up next. You're well-dressed.
The Five
The Five 05-16-2025
All right. Tonight, a real one more thing. Dr. Drew. You're gross. It's August. Emily Campagna. Tyrus. That's a great show. Let's do this. Gus's Daily Diary. Good last walk today. Did all his business. Made friends with another Frenchie who totally got him. Wanted to check out the ledge and get out of the rain, so we did a photo shoot. He peed, found a discarded mirror, and took an artsy photo.
The Five
The Five 05-16-2025
I don't know. I think, you know, throw him in jail. You just kind of look. Look, he went to the beach because he's all washed up. I like the thing I like is how the dying media is portraying this story as conservatives pounce. on this. Oh, my God, they're making it out into something it really isn't. You guys invented the pounce. You know, Elon Musk makes a salute.
The Five
The Five 05-16-2025
You spent a week on that, talking about how that was Hitlerian and how all Trump supporters were Nazis. The only exercise the media gets is by pouncing. So we're going to pounce a little. You guys hit the showers. The people who pounce every day on every little thing Trump has said and created hoaxes off nothing do not lecture us on blowing things out of proportion. There's so many people.
The Five
The Five 05-16-2025
whose identity is tied forever to Trump. But it's their choice. It's not like Trump spends his life thinking about this chuckle nut. This guy has Trump on the brain all the time. Trump has created a legion of people whose brains are somehow broken. And I said this, I think, yesterday.
The Five
The Five 05-16-2025
If the filter that you have to see life constantly has you waking up with disappointment and bitterness, you should probably change your filter. You know, Jesse... Yes. Someone once said holding on to a grudge is like drinking poison, hoping it kills the other person. I think it was either Nelson Mandela or Ryan Seacrest. But you see this, but you see this among never Trumpers.
The Five
The Five 05-16-2025
The first thing they do every morning is they drink the poison, you know. And I don't by the way, I don't I don't. Begrudge Democrats. I don't think Jessica's like this. Sports is politics is a team sport. So you're a guy lost. You don't like the guy who won. I see these grudges more on people on the right.
The Five
The Five 05-16-2025
Never Trumpers who have who have so much negative emotion that it impacts the way they look at everything and their own well-being. They have to learn from like this guy is definitely stuck with a broken Trump brain. And when you're on the beach making little stones, there's you got a problem. You look at like Bill Maher.
The Five
The Five 05-16-2025
When Bill Maher went to visit Trump, what did you there's one thing you knew. Both of them felt a little emotionally lighter afterwards. There's something about doing that that makes you feel better. You got to let go of these these crazy. I mean, I don't care. He can do whatever he wants. He can he can write my name in stones. I don't give a damn.
The Five
The Five 05-16-2025
It's been around forever, that so-called bribe. They were talking to the Biden administration about it.
The Five
The Five 05-16-2025
There's no we already know there was no Joe Biden. So it's kind of hard to give him any credit.
The MeidasTouch Podcast
Fox News Loses It on Air Over Trump Shock Admissions
That creek looks clean. It doesn't look like it's filled with sewage. And I have seen Pete Hegseth swim miles and miles in a Speedo in the Hudson River, which you can't even see through. This, you can see right through. I think it's fine.
The MeidasTouch Podcast
Fox News Loses It on Air Over Trump Shock Admissions
Well, he's following up for Mayor Pete. I don't know. Greg, I fly out of Newark. It's my home airport. And I'm going to the West Coast next week. And the Qataris have offered to give me a plane. Fox is not going to have anything. They're not going to give me a hard time about that. I don't think so. It's a gift. It's a gift. It'll go to the Waters Foundation after I'm finished with it.
The MeidasTouch Podcast
Desperate Fox News Flips Out on Air as Trump Cracks
Our chief legal analyst, Greg Gutfeld. Oh, yes. Well, I'm glad you asked me that question. Look, John Roberts says it's not appropriate. It's not an appropriate response. when you disagree with the judge. It is really a surprise to me that Trump doesn't follow the appropriate protocol when there are rapists and murderers invading our country. Maybe a guy in a robe in D.C.
The MeidasTouch Podcast
Desperate Fox News Flips Out on Air as Trump Cracks
can follow all the protocols, but Trump is the effing president of the United States who protects 300 million-plus people. He is a leader who does not have the luxury of opening up his little books to read. Oh, my God, maybe he didn't do it the right way. Roberts, shut the F up. This is something that a president has to do. He has to do this.