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Chapter 1: What announcement do they make at the start?
what's going on everyone welcome to my apartment uh do have an announcement before today's episode we got invited to perform at just for laughs festival is the largest comedy festival in the world okay so we are going to be in vancouver in february on february 20th we're going to be performing at the queen elizabeth theater as part of the just for laughs festival uh we're super excited and honored that we got invited to this thing
Chapter 2: Who will be performing at the Just For Laughs festival?
Like Jerry Seinfeld is performing three days later at the same place. It's crazy. But you guys can get tickets to this if you're in the Vancouver area or if you want to come to the show. Just go to TheBasementYard.com. Tickets will go on sale December 17th at 10 a.m. Pacific. Okay? So pop out. Come show love to your boys. But February 20th, Queen Elizabeth Theater in Vancouver. And yeah, tickets.
December 17th, 10 a.m. See you there. Welcome back to The Basement. Welcome back to the basement yard.
Chapter 3: What humorous banter occurs about their outfits?
Welcome back to the basement yard. It is I, Frank Alvarez. Thanks for joining me on this adventure of laughs, love, and maybe a little bit of self-reflection.
Can I guess your favorite color?
No. Red.
Red is what I was going to say.
Yeah, bitch. Well, guess what? It's purple. I know. Relax. Guess what, bitch? It's Frank Alvarez. Here I am joined today by monochrome Mikey. Sorry. One-tone Terry. Oh, you wrote down a bunch of jokes? Bland Brian. That's you today, too, bitch. Or Carl the cream-looking cuck. That's you, bitch. You're cream head to toe. What the fuck is wrong? Stand up, show them the whole outfit.
Show them the whole outfit. Show them. Okay. Show them. I will, but... No, no, no, no, no. Before... Okay. Yeah. Look at this. Nice sweater. The exact same... Look, and then show them the shoes.
Show them the shoes. Look at you. You'd be invisible in a blizzard. Fucking loser. Frank, you... Add some flair. Add some pop. Pizazz. Oh, how about my Buc-ee's football shirt? Hell yeah. How about my Buc-ee's football shirt?
It's a jersey. Don't you dare disrespect jerseys, bitch. Ew, I said football shirt. You did say football shirt because... Frank, you're wearing one color too. I am not, bitch. I'm wearing several colors.
Three. Oh. Four. Five. This is the day you choose to say a joke about me. And I look good. Sorry. You do look good.
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Chapter 4: How do they feel about retail jobs?
Bank. Good for them. And I'll tell you, as someone that worked in retail, they deserve every fucking penny of it because that is a hellhole of an industry. Yeah. It is. And especially around this time of the year.
Did you ever work in retail to the point where you had to fold clothes?
Yeah. Really? I can't speak for what the breakdown and the fucking structural shit is now.
Good, because if you were going to go through your resume, I was going to walk out of here. No, no, no, no, no.
But the way that Target was organized when I was there is there was a store manager. And then there was like the assistant managers, but the store manager was called like the store team lead. And then the people that were in my position were the executive team leaders. So like it was just kind of like, you know, and we were, we had our like work, you know, like center, like what we were doing.
Mine was asset protection. Other was like guest experience, sales floor. But you still had to fold. But you kind of just had to do whatever the job required. So there were days where I spent 10 hours, without exaggeration, just folding t-shirts. And it was— Are you good at it? I'm a pretty good t-shirt folder.
I don't mean to— Yo, I don't know how— Still to this day, I'm not good at folding long-sleeve t-shirts.
Long-sleeves suck, but you have to fold the sleeves and then fold them up on themselves like a full-metal suit.
Yeah, I just, I don't do that. Yeah. You want to know how I fold them?
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Chapter 5: What are their thoughts on nostalgia and memories?
I have gotten... I've been getting better at it. Okay. I also live with someone who's the polar opposite, who will just... Wants to throw everything out? Not everything, but, like, she's pretty good at getting rid of things. I like getting rid of stuff. I... Don't you like new stuff? I do like new stuff, but you know what's even better than new stuff?
New stuff on top of you already having this also cool stuff, you know?
old stuff yeah well you say old i say storied that's the way that i story that's the way i approach it that's a cute way of well seasoned right you know think of well when you're talking about underwear and then you're saying seasoned well i think because i have a better connection to the earth and uh you know just a sense of spirituality than technically because you're not littering because you're not throwing out your old underwear i think like i have 25 year old underwear you know that
No. I have 20-year-old underwear. Okay. It's not gotten to 25 yet. Shout out to whoever made that, by the way. Hold him up. Like, hold him up for 20 years. No, no, no. It is not. It is tattered.
Does it go on your body? You wear it?
No. No, no, no, no, no. It is in storage. It's underwear and you don't wear it? Yeah, of course. Is it framed? It is in storage at the moment. It is tattered. It has gotten to a point where the elastic is like, if I pull it, it will turn into dust. Yeah. So, you know. That's insane, dude. Well, what are you going to do? What are you going to do? Throw it out. Speaking of insane. Okay.
God, thank God I remembered to show you this. There was a guy that tweeted at us. I am firmly assuming gender here, but Luke Schultz. Shout out to our friend on Twitter. X, I don't care. But he's like, all right, we talked about AI recently. And he's like, yo, I was fucking around with AI one day, and I asked them to make...
script and audio for you guys for your show and it oh like an ai version of our show an ai version of our show it is like 90 seconds long so it is not long at all but it is and i listen to it joey has not seen it yet please it is i texted him saying don't check your twitter mention and he said i don't anyways so i need to play this for you 90 seconds it's us It is a fucking whirlwind.
Does it sound like us? Honestly, kind of. That's freaky. But like you can hear it and you hear like something is off. Okay. Like the, you know, it's just weird. So this is not, this is like our actual intro.
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Chapter 6: How do they react to AI-generated content?
What's that?
9-11. Right. Oh, come on, Joe. That's not funny. I'm just joking, man. The NYPD can handle it.
The NYPD can handle it.
You know, the famously thick-skinned police department in the city of New York. I'm just kidding, man. The NYPD can handle it. Why am I... The NYP diddly? Yeah, what did I say just now? P-diddly? That is so fucking funny because why... Can they handle it?
Chapter 7: What comedic exchanges occur about 9-11 jokes?
Not only that, but where is AI going that that's what you come up with?
Yeah, like they can handle, they can take the joke. And I like that they have put me as the moral high ground of this show.
Oh, that's what that means.
Yeah, like they can take a joke. I thought it was like the NYPD can handle 9-11. I mean... They did. I mean, in addition to the FDNY, Port Authority, and other neighboring places and offices. I didn't know it was the joke that it was referring to. It was saying, I was like, oh, that's not nice. And you're like, they can handle it. I'll be honest with you.
That's mad funny.
If anyone were to hear our 9-11 jokes, I don't think the NYPD, and it's not like we're making jokes about 9-11, but I don't think they would handle it.
I'll do you one better. I know the FDNY won't because there is one that I have made 9-11 jokes to and he's not happy about it.
Yeah, no, no. I can imagine he's not pumped about it.
Dude, he saw a clip where we made a 9-11 joke and he did not like it.
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Chapter 8: What products do they discuss in their ads?
So if you want to try jumping into the world of fitness, even if you have never done it before or you don't know too much, there's over 1,000 demonstration videos so you can learn a lot from this as well. Uh, but yeah, get 25% off your subscription or try the app for free, uh, for seven days at fitbod.me slash basement spelled F I T B O D dot M E slash basement. Go try it right now.
Uh, also this podcast is sponsored by better help. Better help is online therapy. Okay. If you want to talk to a therapist, you can do so with better help. In just 48 hours, they will connect you to a therapist. They also make it very easy to switch from different therapists to different ones so that you can find the right fit for you because that is a big portion of it.
You don't want to be telling all your secrets to someone you don't really vibe with, so it's important to find the right fit for you.
And I've been in therapy for years. I think that therapy is very important, and everyone should be in it at some point in their life, if not all the time. Um, so yeah, I think that it's, it's very helpful, especially in, in ways that you don't even really know. Like, even if you feel like I'm good, I don't really have anything. I'm pretty happy and blah, blah, blah. Like it's good.
Just starting there is a good starting point and you can kind of probably unlock some stuff. It's very helpful. It feels like organizing your life. It's, it's nice. So, If you want to get started with BetterHelp, you can go to betterhelp.com slash basemanyard, and you will get 10% off of your first month, okay?
So that is betterhelp.com slash basemanyard to get 10% off of that first month, all right? Enjoy. And while you're taking that self-love, self-help journey, why don't you do me a favor and go to patreon.com and take a journey with us, a journey into more of us, baby. I don't mean to assimilate both things to being the same, but you never know.
Maybe you need some more time to smile, happy, all that stuff. So go to patreon.com slash TheBasementYard where we continue to tell you guys and thank you guys for all the love and support. You sign up today and that first tier, you get these weekly episodes one week in advance. And that second tier, you get exclusive episodes every... Every single Friday.
So you can start and end your week with The Basement Yarn. You guys have continued to support us and help us grow. I know this is something Joe has spoken about on our Patreon episodes, but we're currently in transition into a new studio. And it's because of people like you that have helped and supported us. Also...
If you're looking for a last minute gift for the basement yard fan in your life or someone that you want to get into the show or said, Hey, I've been wanting to get into a show. Patreon is a great, great, great holiday gift idea. So check it out. Patreon.com slash the basement yard. Thank you guys so much. We appreciate you. We love you. And we're really excited for 2025.
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