Text fighting... Don't do it. That's just one of the lessons this week... Plus, Twitter isn't the place for trying out humour and a listener has wise words about whether or not you should tell somebody if their partner is cheating.Tickets for Joanne's tour Pinotphile are now LIVE: www.joannemcnally.comVogue's Book Tour: www.fane.co.uk/vogue-williamsIf you’d like to get in touch, you can send an email to [email protected] review Global's Privacy Policy: https://global.com/legal/privacy-policy/For merch, tour dates and more visit: www.mytherapistghostedme.comThis episode contains explicit language and adult themes that may not be suitable for all listeners.
Chapter 1: What is the European tour announcement?
We've crashed. By the way, sorry, before we start, can I please... We broke. Can I please plug my European tour and my Ireland and UK tour? I've dates. I've dates to sell. No, you can't. I've pork. No. London. I said no. Bournemouth. Berlin. No. I have a second Lisbon. I have a second Amsterdam. No. Vogue, stop. Stop it.
Oh, I'm sick. I'm sick.
I've had to go on.
I'm on an inhaler. I'm very unwell.
I know I'm very Darth Vader, but yeah. The noise. I thought I'd left the windows open. It's like, hold on. I actually have to turn you down.
I'm sorry. I'll sit back for the mic. You're like a Victorian child sick with the consumption. It's really, honestly, it's really bad. At the wedding, I couldn't, on the Saturday, I couldn't open my, and look at the size of my mouth. Obviously, I could still fit food in the size of it.
But I actually could only half open it because all my sinuses and all my top jaw and stuff were just, I was in bits. Your top jaw. What was going on with the bottom jaw?
The bottom jaw was just fine. I could get that down to let the food in, you know. wow let the trap door open oh yeah for the treats god you sound now you sound awful I'll be honest yeah thank you very much so what does the inhaler do what does the are you like are you is that like is this kind of are you asthmatic now is what I'm asking
I'm not asthmatic, but I have to say when I do use the inhaler, I make sure people are around. I'm not just using that in private. I want people to know how unwell I am and how I'm really getting through this alone and not really complaining very much. So thanks for asking. I might actually get it for a video, Jo, if you wouldn't mind waiting.
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Chapter 2: Why is text fighting considered unproductive?
But I like the line where she says give people their reality back. I think that's a powerful lesson. However... You also don't know, like, sometimes you're like, am I going to really get involved in someone else's drama? Like, then what if they decide to stay with the person anyway? And then they're embarrassed because they know that you know. And there's so many levels to it.
There is a lot of levels to it. But like, I would want to know. Like, I have been with people in the past.
relationships quite serious relationships and I was cheated on and no one told me but a lot of people I knew knew and that really pissed me off when when when it was over broke up over different things but like just the just the like like the ridiculousness of it and I felt really stupid then because it was like four people or something like not an insignificant number of people and also it
They could be, you don't know what they're doing when they're sleeping with other people and then they're coming back and sleeping with you. And it's just like, it's dangerous for your health. It's embarrassing when someone doesn't tell you.
And it actually, that really pissed me off because I found out so long after we broke up that I was like, and also this bullshit of like, oh, well, they might be in an open relationship. That's a reality now. People are cranking things open. Wouldn't be for me now. I just think that if someone's in an open relationship, they're open about being in an open relationship.
They're not closed about being in an open relationship. You know if they are. Do you know what I mean?
That's not necessary. I don't know if that's true. I know, well, one couple. Well, I suppose I know. So I suppose I'm proving a point to be correct. But it's not in their bio. Some people, it's in their bio. They identify with the polyamory.
But some people are just kind of discreetly... I think you know when someone's... Yeah, I think you know when someone's being a snake or not, though. If someone's being snaky and cheating and... But I also like... It just fascinates me because it's like, what's the point? Is it just because you want to have your cake and eat it? Or like, what is...
Sexual diversity. It's like sex. You know yourself in long-term relationships. Well, you're actually very blessed in your long-term relationship.
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Chapter 3: What should you do if you suspect cheating?
But I guess, technically, I just don't see the point in journaling because I'm like, anything I write down, I'm like, why am I wasting time writing my own thoughts? I should be writing stuff for stand-up or, you know, creative projects. But I did kind of go, Joanne, you really need to get over this all.
all men cheat thing because it's not true and like the last guy didn't cheat on you at all so like why are you so hung up about this you need to really it's time to move on then I downloaded Hinge and swiped a bit and then lost all faith in humanity again I do think I do think that it's I don't think all men are cheats I definitely don't they're not I don't know where I'm going with that I just have these very dramatic moments although I will say it's the ones you don't think and it's the ones you do think so technically that is everyone
back around and circle back to my original thoughts all of them do it for god's sake all of them are at it yeah were you getting tagged in as many clips of the Eurovision presenters as I was oh look watch I can do it a shamrock tongue which is what we were being tagged in so Vogue just for our listeners because that's all we have Vogue just curled her tongue
No, I did not curl my tongue. I made it into a shamrock.
Is that not the same thing? No, it's not. The Eurovision was on at the weekend, the Gay Olympics, as they're called. And it was the Swiss were hosting it and there was two presenters, two female presenters. And they, I even, I was like, I have to give it to them. It did look like, it did resemble myself in Vogue.
It definitely did. It did.
There was one of them where it was quite, she kind of looked like me and she kind of dressed, she wasn't, she was dressed like that kind of, you know, street lesbian style that I like to engage. But some people did say, they were like, spits of you. And they said the other one spits of Vogue, except she has, the one on the telly has a fine rack on her. Which is not something you display.
But that was the only discrepancy in the whole thing. And they were quite like us.
Obviously no one's seen me in my... padded bra that I had on over the weekend. So, sorry.
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