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Chapter 1: What is the main theme of the Distractible Travel Guide: Cincinnati episode?
Good evening, gentle listener, and welcome to Distractible. This episode, Bumbling Bob builds his March Madness, and the Terrific Triad trade tour tips. Wishing Wade stocks up on Scout Snacks, berates Babel Coasters, Crackers, Ballers, and Ass Chili. Monstrous Mark the Render Ranger gets railed by the Power People. Miss Lays Tyler favors Phantoms and rags La Rosas.
From sartorial satisfaction to plush parks. Yes! It's time for Distractible Travel Guide Cincinnati. Now sit back and prepare to be distracted and enjoy the show.
Hello and welcome back to, for some reason, another episode of Distractible. Couldn't tell you why, it just keeps happening. My name is Bob, I'll be your host for today. I'm the host because I won the last one, and the way this works is, the host is the winner. Oh, and the winners for this one are going to be either Mark or Wade, because that's the other part of how this works.
Others and the host is the winner, like laying the foundation for you to win.
I win because I'm the host. I'm the host because I win. I host this one. I win this one. I host the next one. I'm the host forever because all I do is win, win, win, and so on.
What a tautology. Can I comment on something? The listeners are going to weep because I'm going to mention another visual thing. But our shirt color combination is just very pleasant. It's very striking. It's more colorful than we usually are. And yet they match up quite nicely. I think that this is going to be maybe our best episode ever because of that.
We have like a red, a sky, an aqua, and then what, a burnt orange? It's almost a traffic light.
Blue means go. Everyone knows that. It's more, it's green to me. I said almost. I'm not yellow, obviously. Blue almost means go. Everyone knows that. Editors, turn us into a traffic light. It's good to be back on top, boy. Perfect. I do have to agree with you, Mark. I like the colors of our shirts. I'm just going to throw this out there. This is accidentally day three of this shirt.
James was up in the middle of the night last night, so I didn't go to bed till four o'clock. Accidentally slept in, had to go get the dog's medicine. Didn't end up getting the dog's medicine. Still wearing the same shirt. Life is going really well over here for me. And for the listeners out there, I want to comment. We sound really good today. I might sound completely different.
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Chapter 2: Who are the hosts and how is the hosting determined?
I got ones that are kind of just like a sugar cookie this year. But last year I went a little bit too insane. So I toned it down. I only got nine boxes this year, which is still a lot.
I mean, it has to last you a whole year. That's really not that crazy. Like you buy a lot and you keep the Thin Mints in the back of the freezer or, you know, whatever. You just keep them around. Thin Mints are so good. They are. Frozen thin mints on a hot summer day. Not much compares in terms of cookies.
I never liked coconut in any other capacity than a Samoa. Samoa?
Yeah, Samoa. Those were my favorite and still are in my top three of all time. When I was a kid, those were my absolute favorites. Especially if they get warm because the caramel gets kind of soft. Listen, Girl Scout cookies are like the thing to look forward to in spring. Can I just say I've never gotten over the feeling of it when it's Girl Scout cookie season.
You know how they'll every time you go to like a grocery store or anywhere, there's like a table with like a mom or a parent and like three girls and you walk in and they're just like Girl Scout cookies and they're all like shy and adorable and stuff. And I know I like I try not to buy them. Is it possible to walk past that and not just feel like an asshole? I've never done it.
It's not a personal thing against those specific girls. I just probably already have the ones I need. The bigger update. Mm-hmm. Car decision has been made. Is there a car parked somewhere on property that you own? Because that's really the litmus test. I don't believe you.
You've had decisions made before, so why is this different?
Yeah, well, okay. This is hopefully... So I've got a meeting Thursday to try to see what we can do to actually get the car. It's not comp, you buy it. Yeah, but they never have, no one has cars on lot anymore. It's all like order.
Last time we got a car, I found a car on the lot on the internet. We showed up, we test drove it. That car was ours within five hours. It was a long time of paperwork and bullshit, but... We bought it same day because I picked it out online and I was like, this is exactly the spec I wanted. And then we bought it because they had it and I knew they had it and we bought it.
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Chapter 3: What are some humorous anecdotes from the hosts about their personal lives?
I can't remember if it's every time. I'll bet that goes over well. But yeah, I just purely by random chance. And I don't just win. I crush. I crush him in points. Just absolutely destroy.
I'm going to put down better at sports than Tyler for a point for Mark. Yep. That's true, actually.
I'm surprised you guys didn't do one for Go. He's gone. Oh.
Oh. Where'd he go? He's gone. Honorable. How many times have I started a rumor that Tyler's dead on this podcast? At least one now. I forget where... This is all a delay because I forgot where he's going. He told me many times, but he's not here. I know where he was until the middle of the night last night.
That's very specific. Bird, the porn guy, if you guys remember the porn guy from the porn episode, I found out that he had to take Tyler to the airport last night.
That's weird, because I know where Bird lives, and it's not near where Tyler lives. It is not, meaning that Tyler was in fact gone. Maybe that should be the topic of this episode.
We need to get to the bottom of this ASAP. If we find out where he is by the end of the episode, do we get a point?
Yeah. You can have two points if you find out where he is by the end of the episode. Everybody starts texting Tyler.
Hey, where the fuck are you? I'm debating whether I text Tyler or do I reach for the Girl Scout cookies?
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Chapter 4: How does Mark manage his render farm challenges?
The poor guy who managed that store. I can't imagine how many college nerds he had every day come in and be like,
Hey, are you hiring? You need a... I play video games. You need someone who knows video games. I play at least three.
I mean, it is kind of nice, I guess, if you were an employer and you had a constant stream of semi-qualified people always on hand.
We weren't qualified. I said semi. I said semi-qualified. That's still pretty generous. All I wanted was the employee discount. I wasn't there to do anything else.
like approaching a drug dealer like hey can i be one of your dealers i use your stuff every day can i get an employee discount on these drugs please please just don't do a background check
Well, they did. They did. And they're like, hey, this shows you got some backed up parking tickets. I don't need that on my staff. I don't need that in our organization. So we're going to have to pass. Thank you for your interest. Please remain a loyal customer.
I imagine a lot of people are Apple employees because I believe there's an employee discount there.
You have to be pretty isn't working at an Apple store like a whole pain in the ass, though. You have to be pretty serious about that. It's like there's like trainings and that's one of the places walking into an Apple store. We did that recently. It feels like it's the 2000s in there.
Like in most stores, I feel like the direction in the last couple decades has been less employees, more just let the customer sort of self-serve. There's maybe there's an employee somewhere. If you need help, you can find them. I feel like. the Apple store, they had more people working there than there were people in the store by a huge margin.
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