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Chapter 1: What is the show about?
Guten Abend, liebe Zuschauer, und willkommen zu Distractable. In diesem Episode. Branded Bob kennt seine Sausage, kann keine Akzente und bringt die Jungs, um kundige Linguisten zu sein. Modifiziert Mark geht für gesonderte Nudeln, Louse teilt einen Skabbard, Heimatbewerber und Pachydermen.
Wattled Wade prepares harassment suits, tortures the walking wounded and accidentally advises daytime drinking. From the follically challenged to Wessons word. Yes, it's time for definitely real things. Now sit back and prepare to be distracted and enjoy the show.
Hello and welcome back to another episode of the world's favorite podcast, Distractible. I'm your host because I won the last one. My name is Bob and I'm joined per usual by my two competitors and co-hosts for the day, Wade and Mark. Hello. Hey. Sorry, I'm struggling with technology.
Getting older, you know.
Wir werden sehr alt werden. Das ist eigentlich das, was wir heute sprechen werden. Wenn ihr noch nie diesen Show gesehen habt, ist es ein Show, wo ich Punkte gebe, weil ich der Host bin und die beiden Jungs, die gerade gesagt haben, hallo, sie kämpfen und einer von ihnen gewinnt und dann hostet sie den nächsten. Und dann kämpfe ich gegen den Verlierer und so weiter und so fort.
Und es ist alles gemacht, und die Punkte zählen nicht, aber wir schreiben sie auf unsere kleinen Schrauben von Papier. Bevor wir dazu kommen, habe ich heute ein Spiel, das wir spielen werden, und es ist lustig? Bevor wir dazu kommen, wie geht es dir, Jungs? How's it hanging? You know. You know. You what? I got a headline for you, if you want it. Oh, hell yeah.
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Chapter 2: What game do they play in this episode?
Cheating alleged after men's world conquer champion found with steel chestnut. Um, I don't know anything that you just talked about. Well, maybe a picture would help elucidate this situation. Let me just give you, let me show you a little bit of what we're talking about here. And then it should clear it right up and you should not be confused anymore. Alright, you ready? Conquer? Champion? Oh!
Ja, da bist du. Ich sehe. Das ist wie aus den Leprechaun-Olympischen. Warte, beschreibe das für die Zuhörer.
Auf der linken Seite des Bildes haben wir eine Hand mit einer Schlaufe, die über die Rüste gerollt ist. Wir haben einen schönen blauen Himmel, leichte Flügel. Die Hand scheint einen Stick mit einem Akorn aufzuhalten. Wahrscheinlich ein Chessnut. Auf der anderen Seite... We have a gentleman with a black bowler hat, I think they're called. Wearing a green jacket on the outside.
Looks like the inside is yellow. It's kind of a leprechaun-y look. The man is an older gentleman with grey hair, some grey eyebrows. He's holding his left hand up to admit he cheated. And his right hand is wrapped up on what looks like a chestnut balloon string.
And his chest is covered in chestnutty apricorns. Apricorns. Yes, interesting. Did I describe it well enough? You sure did. I'm really proud of you. The fuck did I just look at? I know this and I'm sure everyone else does. Conkers is a traditional children's game where you're supposed to take turns hitting each other's Conkers. It's not what we called it when we were kids. Is this Ball Tap?
Mit dem Objekt, dass man die anderen Spieler nicht brechen kann. Also kann ich sehen, wie man einen Stahl-Konker, Apricorn, nein, nein, Chessnut, Stahl-Chessnut, das wäre eine Verletzung, weil das nicht brechen wird. Stahl ist schwer. Ja, also ich denke, das ist das Lange und das Kürzere davon. Du schmischst deine Nuts zusammen, bis sie explodieren. Was ist in unserer Kultur passiert?
Erinnerst du dich an 10 Jahre ago? Stahlballen. Es war so gut, jetzt ist es verletzlich. Apparently, Conkers are the seeds of the Chestnut Tree, but they are also called Oblyonkers, Cheggies, or Cheesers. So maybe that's why you were confused, because you thought, you didn't know we were talking about Cheesers.
Yeah, I thought we were talking about, I didn't know we were talking about Cheesers. Oh, he had steel Cheesers?
Yeah, he had a steel Cheeser, this guy. How'd you find this, Mark? Oh, I have various research methods that I will not elucidate.
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Chapter 3: How does the cheating controversy unfold?
Great article, man. That was a good find. I'm glad that my kind is finally getting the recognition and treatment we deserve.
It's only fair. Does that mean we have to stop saying that to you? Would you like us to make fun of you in different ways? I've just always considered it flirting and you guys are welcome to continue. Okay. I'm kinky and I like it. I'm gonna start calling you hairy instead. That is offensive and I'm gonna take you to the highest court of Ohio. The Ohio Labor Tribunal? No! Yeah. I love a tribunal.
I understand what the name... You don't see a lot of bibunals.
You don't.
Bibunal?
No.
Mabunal, if you're being formal.
Oh, you know what? You know what I was gonna bring up? I forgot. Last episode, somehow this completely slipped my mind. We were talking about cringe stuff.
When you hugged your teacher?
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Chapter 4: What are the rules of the word game they play?
Intentional is a word. You don't need to question that one.
Alright, we got Joey Chestnut on my mind or whatever the hell the thing. Joey Chestnut?
Is that the hot dog guy? Joey Chestnut! Yeah. He's the Nathan's hot dog eating champion. He's my champion anyway. He was expunged. Expunged? Disbund. Expunged. He was expunged. Do you mean beaten? Or do you mean his records were taken away? No, he got a different sponsorship from a different hot dog.
He's a con man now. Yes!
I don't get it, I don't get it.
Cons is a brand of hot dog.
Oh! K-A-H-N, right? Like con? I'm an Oscar Mayer, mister.
I'm on my A-Game.
He went indie. He only eats Queen City sausages now. I'm glad Wade liked it. I'm glad he's having fun over there. Can we go back?
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Chapter 5: What hilarious moments occur during the game?
Just word game. Let's just ease into it. Once again, I tried to calibrate these and how hard I think they'll be. So this is probably the hardest one of the entire day. We must spend the rest of the entire episode on it. But the first one, I want to start at star and I want to go to bottle. Star and bottle. And we'll flip a coin to see who goes first. Oh, Wade goes first. Oh, okay. Starlight.
Okay, good one, good one. My turn. Yeah, go ahead. Lightsaber. Oh, that's a tough one. No, no, it's got a clear path. Oh, does it? Yeah.
Saber me timbers.
What? What'd you say? Saber me timbers.
I got it, hold on, I got this.
We can get here, we can see what Mark's laying down, I'm pretty sure. Starlight, lightsaber. I have one that I feel like goes after saber, but I don't see how Mark thinks that's the obvious path, so I feel like I'm wrong.
Sabery flavor. Saber.
Oh wait, I might be getting it backwards. Wait, no, I might have gotten something wrong in the chain. Ah, I messed up. Ah, hold on now. I'm gonna start a word with Saber.
Uh-huh. Saber in Sheet.
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Chapter 6: How is the episode wrapped up?
So I gotta get from beer to bottle. Yay, he did it! I don't know if I'm gonna count that. I don't think he's done. Beer tab, beer well, beer bottle! Ah! Gott, wie lange hat das gedauert? Ich habe nicht geschaut. Es ist 30 Minuten in der Episode. Ah, fuck. Das hat ein bisschen über 10 Minuten gedauert. Oh nein, das ist nicht wahr.
Mehr als 15 Minuten. Du und ich hatten beide fünf Worte. Wir waren so, das wird da kommen. Das wird da kommen. Wir sind nicht so nah gekommen.
Würdest du hören, wie die Reise, die wir gemacht haben, von Star zu Bottle? Nein. other than the east and the sheath other than those two we were pretty good If you don't look at all the of does and in does, it's fantastic.
Saber and Sheath.
Ah, I knew this would be a good idea. Beware the Sheath of the East. I knew you guys would be good at this. Thanks. It would be a challenge for people to even come up with that many connections without stumbling there. I feel like we've really... Without purposefully going away from your goal, yes, it's almost impressive that you were both actually trying to succeed and that's still where we went.
Alright, well I'm excited for this one then because I thought this one might be harder. I have no idea why I thought that. I couldn't tell you. Anyway, your first word is chair and I want you to get to elephant. Am I going first? Mark starts, yes. Okay. Maybe. Chairlift? I can't lift an elephant. Chairlift, lift elephant. Got it. You guys are so good at this. What compound word leads to elephant?
Yeah, that's what I was thinking. I was like, man, that's tough. I can think of one. Oh, I can think of one as well. Mark und ich haben beide auf die gleiche Antwort geschraubt, in fast dem selben Moment, jedes Mal, als Wade sagt, Saber in Schiff. Vielleicht ist das ein Superkraft, den du hast, Bob, wo auch immer du es entdeckst. Ich bin instantan so, oh ja, und ich wette, es ist das Gleiche.
Ich wette, wir denken an das Gleiche. Hier, ich werde es dir schreiben. Sind wir an das Gleiche denken? Teile es allen, damit ich auch wissen kann. Nein, nein, helfe ihm nicht, helfe ihm nicht. Ich dachte, das war kooperativ. Oh, nein, das ist ein anderer. Okay, okay, okay, okay. Oh, I guess I shouldn't tell you since you're playing the game. I have a different one, but that is a good one.
Well, he told you, you tell me and I'll tell Mark mine. All right. That sounds fair. Great. All right. Chair lift. And I got to get to, we have to get to elephant. Your word is lift. And we're trying to get to elephant, Wade. I believe in you. Lift up. That's how you go with lift, lift up. That's what we're working with. Alright, I'll allow it. It couldn't be lift off or any actual thing.
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