Josh Johnson
Appearances
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Democrats' Cringey Opposition, DEI Ban Black History Quiz | Gabrielle Union
What up, world? It's Josh Johnson, and it's also Black History Month. Except this year, Trump is back in the White House, and any mention of anything diverse, equitable, or inclusive, a.k.a. black, is absolutely taboo. So I'm out here to see if we can find some people to help us celebrate the new history month.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Democrats' Cringey Opposition, DEI Ban Black History Quiz | Gabrielle Union
Can you hit me with the story of Martin Luther King Jr. without saying stuff like or is a tough one.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Democrats' Cringey Opposition, DEI Ban Black History Quiz | Gabrielle Union
I mean, is going to get people asking questions. OK. Tell me the story in a few sentences of Rosa Parks without saying stuff like .
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Democrats' Cringey Opposition, DEI Ban Black History Quiz | Gabrielle Union
Yeah, you can say seat.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Democrats' Cringey Opposition, DEI Ban Black History Quiz | Gabrielle Union
Can you tell me about Frederick Douglass without saying...
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Democrats' Cringey Opposition, DEI Ban Black History Quiz | Gabrielle Union
You hit me with something I had never thought about before, which is that Frederick Douglass gave us Tupac, in a sense, which I did not see coming. Why do you think some people are so against Katrina?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Democrats' Cringey Opposition, DEI Ban Black History Quiz | Gabrielle Union
Yeah.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Democrats' Cringey Opposition, DEI Ban Black History Quiz | Gabrielle Union
Yeah, okay.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Democrats' Cringey Opposition, DEI Ban Black History Quiz | Gabrielle Union
While I agree with everything you said, it's probably one of the worst things you could have hit on. Uh... Okay, gonna pull you aside right here for a quick sidebar. Now, are there any meetings that I'm not aware of that we're like getting together and going over Malcolm X?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Democrats' Cringey Opposition, DEI Ban Black History Quiz | Gabrielle Union
Okay. All right. I appreciate you playing. Absolutely. And you know what? Because you did such a great job, I do have a prize for you. Okay. You won a Harriet Tubman 20. Oh, what was that? I have for both of you a Harriet Tubman 20. Thank you. Maybe, you know, one day you can use those Tubmans to buy something.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Democrats' Cringey Opposition, DEI Ban Black History Quiz | Gabrielle Union
Beyonce tickets would be great. It would take a substantial amount of toughness to get Beyonce tickets, but in a better world.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Gets "Hot" for Kennedy Center, RFK Confirmed, Eggflation Rampant | Brady Corbet
What price do you think you stop eating eggs entirely? If it goes to $20, I would just have to quit eggs entirely. Okay, so $20 eggs, that's your stopping point, means 19, we're still... 19, we're still in the game. Damn, people are willing to go higher than I thought. I smell an opportunity.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Gets "Hot" for Kennedy Center, RFK Confirmed, Eggflation Rampant | Brady Corbet
So if, like, some guy was selling eggs, and he was selling them for, like, you know, maybe even... What do you mean, some guy?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Gets "Hot" for Kennedy Center, RFK Confirmed, Eggflation Rampant | Brady Corbet
If I had an egg right here, right now, how much are you paying for this guy?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Gets "Hot" for Kennedy Center, RFK Confirmed, Eggflation Rampant | Brady Corbet
These folks clearly didn't understand the value of what I was holding. So I went to a professional who would appreciate the opportunity in front of them. I'm looking to do some business today. And, uh... What do you got? I brought a lot of inventory. What is that? It's eggs, man.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Gets "Hot" for Kennedy Center, RFK Confirmed, Eggflation Rampant | Brady Corbet
I do. I do. Great. I do. Okay. So I'll take Nintendo Switch. I'll take two Switches. All right. One MacBook Pro. And give me a bunch of bracelets. And I'll give you like three dozen.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Gets "Hot" for Kennedy Center, RFK Confirmed, Eggflation Rampant | Brady Corbet
Look at this, regret, regret. That guy wouldn't know a good deal if it flashed him in a trench coat. Time to take my product to the high rollers. Hi, how you doing?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Gets "Hot" for Kennedy Center, RFK Confirmed, Eggflation Rampant | Brady Corbet
Doing well, I'm looking to get something appraised. Okay. So I'm very excited about it.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Gets "Hot" for Kennedy Center, RFK Confirmed, Eggflation Rampant | Brady Corbet
I'll tell you right now, on the street, these are going.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Gets "Hot" for Kennedy Center, RFK Confirmed, Eggflation Rampant | Brady Corbet
Yeah. I think an egg, this is at least like four carats.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Gets "Hot" for Kennedy Center, RFK Confirmed, Eggflation Rampant | Brady Corbet
Okay, I'm gonna go because it feels like you pressed a button or something and like somebody's coming, but. Missing out. Good luck. Precious metals, precious eggs. No buyers yet, but once word gets around the streets, I'm sure I'll become pretty popular and the yolk will be on there.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Gets "Hot" for Kennedy Center, RFK Confirmed, Eggflation Rampant | Brady Corbet
Humpty Dumpty. What used to be a wholesome tale about the fragility of the human condition now serves as a stark reminder of the rising cost of these. Today, I'm talking with a group that consumes most of the eggs in the United States, people, to see how they are dealing with eggflation. Can we afford another take? Eggflation, is it affecting you right now?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Gets "Hot" for Kennedy Center, RFK Confirmed, Eggflation Rampant | Brady Corbet
I might have to turn vegan, man. Really? No, I'm just kidding.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Gets "Hot" for Kennedy Center, RFK Confirmed, Eggflation Rampant | Brady Corbet
Yes. Vegans are a challenge. How many eggs would you say the average person goes through in a week?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Gets "Hot" for Kennedy Center, RFK Confirmed, Eggflation Rampant | Brady Corbet
I go through 18. 18 eggs. That must be nice to afford.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Gets "Hot" for Kennedy Center, RFK Confirmed, Eggflation Rampant | Brady Corbet
Oh, you just ball it like that. OK. Abundant mindset. So I feel like with the very little resistance you've had to the whole, like, inflation of these eggs, are you like an heir to an egg fortune?
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Gets "Hot" for Kennedy Center, RFK Confirmed, Eggflation Rampant | Brady Corbet
OK, that makes sense. You're from Texas, and they hate when you waste eggs, whether they're from chickens or humans.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump Gets "Hot" for Kennedy Center, RFK Confirmed, Eggflation Rampant | Brady Corbet
Yeah. Is there anything you're backing off of so you can still afford the eggs? We back it off of liquor. Oh, OK. Except Don Julio. We drink to that. What was the last amount that you paid for like a dozen eggs?
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
I don't know how you defend Diddy, but if there is a way, if someone comes up with a way, I think it will be like a landmark case in law if you're able to effectively defend Diddy. It would be different if somebody was just being accused of a series of crimes in one thing, right? Like if someone's on trial, like Jeffrey Dahmer's on trial.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
He's on trial for like basically being a serial killer, you know? But that's like one specific thing. So if you can prove he's not a serial killer, you've already cleaned him of like all this stuff. Did he...
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
I mean, I've said I've said this on stage before, and it is something that I genuinely believe no matter who you are, like listening to the show or like anyone that I that I think about in their lives. I genuinely from the bottom of my heart hope that like three quarters of your dreams come true. Like. Just almost all of them, but not quite.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
uh, writing as much as you can all the time, then, you know, you, you do end up in a, in a place where you have a lot to bring to the next show for the next night or the next city. And I, I, I think because I am like naturally, uh, off by myself a little bit, this is something that's been leading up to this moment of, of, um,
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
Because I feel like when all your dreams come true, we have all the money in the world. That is when you lose your mind and usually not in like a fun way. You know, like every once in a while you'll hear of a billionaire you've never heard of before that. Like maybe they're not the most like philanthropic person, but they're like, oh, I just want to make the best candy.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
And you're like, OK, Wonka, you know. But by and large, that much power, money, influence, anything, even if it's like happenstance, it leads to something that's like very bad for other people, right?
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
And I mean, most people don't have to come up with more dreams. There's plenty of dreams they're never going to get. So, you know, if you on a random Tuesday needed more dreams, you'd probably lose your mind too. You'd probably be like, yeah, well, Like I like I've told people about it before.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
It's like I don't know if Musk I mean, I definitely know what Musk has done with Twitter and how he's leveraged it to be this sort of information disinformation platform towards his own ends. Right. I don't know if that was always the plan, if I'm being honest. I feel like he woke up one day and was like, what if I just like owned all the talking?
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
And then he bought Twitter or he joked about buying Twitter and then they made him buy Twitter. I don't know if it's, I don't know.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
I'm going to buy all the talking. Watch me. Like, I think that Mondays are difficult enough. Imagine if you had a Monday coming and you needed new dreams. I think it would, I don't know if it's a key to happiness, you know?
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
I have some very bad news for you. I'm almost there. I'm almost like out of dreams. So next time you talk to me, I might be out of my mind.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
how I've always been mixed with what I'm really passionate about, which is stand up. And not necessarily just politics in general, but the way that people are digesting the news and everything. Because I think that sometimes we don't give ourselves credit that something is happening that's not really new. And so you hear people go on and on about like a new development of a story.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
Yeah, so I always wanted to do stand-up. I just didn't know that it could be a job in a way. And when I went to college, I studied design and I used it for a little while, but ultimately I moved to Chicago to start doing comedy.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
sort of built from there and then moved to new york and built from there um i think that my my general dreams now is just to really be doing what i'm doing now but at a at a more efficient better higher level um you know i think it's a dream of every comedian to get better and and now
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
I feel like I have a chance to really build community and culture with the people that enjoy my work and the people who are out there struggling. I think that You know, to some degree and in every way, we've already covered it with the billionaires. Everyone suffers. So there's no need to suffer alone.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
If there's already something that happens to everybody, then why have it happen to you by yourself or why like suffer in silence and stuff? And I feel like comedy is the thing that that undercuts all all that suffering, at least for for a little while, you know.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
And I think that if I can get better at comedy, if I can get better at building community, then I think that that's the sort of world shaping stuff that has lasting impact even after I'm, you know, gone. And I don't know, you know, change the world's a whole like set of bigger issues and problems than I'm like smart enough to tackle. But I think that you change your community and then that sort of
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
blossoms out. I think that's my dream right now. I like what I wear. I wear the same stuff every day. I don't drive. I don't really do cars or anything like that. If I can...
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
learn more effectively how to build community with the people who come to the show or the people who don't come to the show but watch online or if i can make sure that some of the dopest people that i've met that just enjoy my work get to meet each other and go off and make their own thing i think that that i'll be really happy with the work that i've done so those those are the main dreams right now
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
Yeah, I mean, I don't even need them to listen to me. I think that I just want them to sort of like have each other. I don't know. I don't even know if I'll always say anything worth listening to. I think that if... you know, sometimes you remember the person that introduced you to your best friend. You know what I mean?
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
Maybe because you're still friends with them or maybe because of the situation, the happenstance, whatever. And that's one of the main goals is to, when I say community, I mean like, The idea that, yeah, maybe these people met at a show, but maybe they all became friends, exchanged numbers. And now maybe they come to another show of mine.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
Maybe they never come to another show of mine, but they have someone in their in their life now. And then I was able to influence that with with what I do, because, you know, at the at the end of the day, comedy is only really as important as like it is to the people that, that watch it.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
I mean, my, my grandparents, my grandma, um, my grandma, my grandma, especially my, um, my mom, my aunt, my dad, I've been very blessed with, with, with good family. And, um,
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
But then if you look at the wider context of history, you see that this is really just a big part of it is cyclical. And I think that one puts me a little bit at ease to joke about it, but then also makes it so that hopefully I bring something a bit fresh to the idea.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
with with good not just like opportunity but with good mentorship and everything and and knowing what influence does uh two people and four people and so if you if you're if you're not careful with with what happens as you gain influence it all becomes stuff that happens to you as opposed to things that you can do for someone else and so i i try my my best i'm not perfect and it's all like very new yeah i mean like like all this stuff is like
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
At least where I am now is a year old.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
Yeah, I mean, I think everybody does it for their own reasons. I feel like some people do comedy to sort of heal themselves, and some people do it to... Even if you... I'm also not trying to make it this esoteric movement of of like social consciousness or something. I genuinely believe that like making people laugh is important because when you laugh, you feel no pain.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
And so I'm not smart enough to be a doctor. I'm not dedicated enough or savvy enough to be one of the quote unquote like good politicians who would probably just get like lost in the ether anyway. I'm good at this thing. I'm good at talking to people and bringing an angle on a story that hopefully makes them laugh.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
and if if this is the only thing that i'm like really good at then here's here's all the things i'd like to do in life and let's see if we can connect them to get to that thing i sometimes like comedians do get a little bit too like on a high horse about what comedy is or what it does for people or and i'm not trying to do that at all i just i want to make people laugh because i feel like one when you're laughing about something you can actually enjoy it even if the thing is painful and two i think that
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
when something even as goofy or dumb as a joke can be, when you can like talk to someone about a joke, you can build that shared relationship. And that's my way of doing it. So I also don't wanna make it sound like I'm like trying to be, I guess something bigger than I am in a way. I'm just having fun doing comedy. This is all the stuff that I hope happens while I'm doing comedy.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
So it's where I focus my attention.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
Yeah, sure. No one was ever not supportive, but they were reasonably worried. I think it's fair to be like, okay, you're working this grocery store job and then you're doing comedy at night. All right. And then I think that it wasn't until I got hired at Fallon that I think people really understood that you could like make some form of living doing it.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
So, you know, no one was ever like outwardly discouraging or anything. But I think even even with my dad, my dad was like very excited about me. um getting into comedy and stuff but but when my dad was alive I didn't have any major um successes or anything so he was just that was just such a genuine support of like of like oh cool okay you know I don't even think he was
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
thinking too much or worried too much about what I was doing to like pay the rent as far as like whether it was the grocery store job or or like odd jobs here and there I think he was more like oh that's cool I like I enjoy comedy hopefully you'll meet people that I like you know I I've enjoyed my time um at every job that I've had because I found a way to um
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
cling on to every bit of positive feedback, every good experience, all my coworkers who brought me joy and made me better. And so I feel like Everyone's going to have their experiences and things to say. I think that for me, when I look at making creativity a job in any form, right, there is a certain amount of play that a person within themselves can potentially lose because now I'm not...
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
I'm not just doing this. Like, I'll give you a good example. When I did a little bit of freelance work, like just trying to almost like sell, it was like selling onion-esque articles, like satire articles to sites, right? Like that was, for a little while. Hard work right there. I was trying to like, okay. That's a hard hustle. Yeah, and it was insane. It was very dumb.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
I should not have even tried to do this. This was before I was working at Fallon. This was before I was like, like doing anything officially.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
Yeah, and so at the time... Writing funny's hard, man. I was in Chicago. I think my rent was... I was cheap too, my rent was like 550, because I was like roommate and in a cheaper part of town and everything. So 550, all the places I was looking up, they would pay you anywhere from 20 to $50 for an article if it got approved, but there was still an editor.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
So they could still tell you, hey, go back, fix this thing, whatever, right? But in my head, I was like, all right, if I do like 11, 12 articles, I should be solid, but I haven't even eaten yet. I'm just like, 11, 12 articles, this should be good. But I love satire, and I love writing, and I love what these sites do, right?
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
And this is all, by the way, with the hope that like this is all, by the way, with the hope that the things I'm writing, no one else is writing. No one's writing it better than me. I'm picking good topics they're interested in. Like. This was like pie in the sky insane to be doing.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
sure sure i mean i think when i say i don't really do much else like i clearly eat and sleep and stuff but i just mean um i try to keep myself as curious as possible about not just like an individual story but about how we get to certain places um so if if i see something that is maybe on CNN or something like that.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
Every month. Nuts, just nuts. Math that doesn't work. Exactly. As soon as you are doing that, you are having less fun doing comedy. And so I feel like any time you take on comedy, entertainment, whether it's music, any form as a job, you are adding something extra to the relationship you have with that art. And so I think that it's going to be very hard to...
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
be making something with your friends and have it stay like if you're talking about a working environment like working for you or something like that it's going to be very hard for anyone who brings a passion for for what the job is in their personal life and they're going to bring that passion to you and make this whole show and everything around your business better it's going to be hard for them to do that with rent on the line with you know i mean and so
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
Everything is less fun with money concerned. Exactly. And so I think a lot of what it means to make money off of your art is going to entail having to make... real concessions with what you expect every day to feel like. Because if somebody just told you you had a stipend, right? If somebody is like, look, I wanna be, even old school, like when people, when artists had patrons, right?
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
And they were like, look, your housing, your food, and maybe a little bit of leisure is gonna be taken care of monthly. I just want you to create. Even in that, even in those relationships where you straight up had a patron who made sure you were gonna be taken care of, it was a blank check back in the day, like Roman times, right? Blank check.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
You still had a pressure of like, well, I don't wanna offend my patron. I hope in the painting portrait that I'm doing of their family, the daughter likes how she looks. So there's never gonna not be something to be in your head about around making entertainment, you know?
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
You got to remember, I was working at a grocery store right before I got hired. And then even as I was hired, because I didn't quit right away. So then I was still like, hey, what are you doing at the grocery store?
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
Oh, stacking grapes and like, you know, ringing people up and stuff like that.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
Yeah, I let there be a little bit of overlap just because I was still in disbelief I got hired.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
Yeah, I mean, I would say so. I would say because I had a manager at the time, and my manager at the time reached out to the booker, comedy booker, at Tonight Show, and we sent tape. And then that tape, I believe, got seen by the head writer at the time. And the head writer was like, oh, we like these jokes. You know, just these are just jokes I'm doing to hopefully perform on tonight's show.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
And so they were like, oh, would he want to send in a packet? And so that got back to me and my manager was like, hey, look, you can tell them you're not interested and you just want to perform on tonight's show and be about your way. Or you could write a packet's worth of jokes, like monologue jokes, sketches, desk pieces, all this, all these different stuff, any ideas. Right.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
And so I was like, oh, OK, I mean, I'll do the packet. I'm working at the grocery store, so I'll do the packet. Right. And then sent that off. And maybe a week or so later, I didn't even think anything had come of it. Low key, I actually thought I had maybe blown my opportunity to perform because I was like, oh man, what if they didn't like my jokes? They didn't like my jokes so much.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
They're actually like, we don't like the jokes we liked. before we asked you to, oh, they don't want anything to do with me. I was like, I was in my apartment with my roommates just like, oh, oh, what did I do? And then sure enough, I get a call from my manager being like, they want another packet of jokes, but this time it's a tighter turnaround because that's what a day's work would be like.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
And there's already a sort of wide narrative of the way the story is being told because it's impossible to to share information without some form of like moving the needle, some form of either a person's interpretation or their biases comes into play. Distortion.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
And so then I did that. And they brought me in for an interview. And then after I interviewed, I found out a few days later that I got the job, right? And so once again, I'm like this kid that's moved to New York that is like so... like shell shock that I'm even in this situation that I'm just trying to like have the best time possible, meet as many cool people as I can.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
Like I'm even to this day, the writers that I worked with at Tonight Show shaped a lot of like how and what I do now because it was the place that taught me to not be like precious. It's like, you will write 75 jokes and it's only possible for three of them to be used because of literally time.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
Yeah, because even now I kind of feel like I'm only speaking to my... to like my thought process when I go to any any job or when I look to even when I put something online or something like that because I have people asking me they're like oh now people expect you to post do you feel pressure and I feel like my my feelings with that when it comes to like
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
what I'm doing and like the community that I'm trying to build and everything and how there's so many places you can fall and you can fail people is that to me pressure is a privilege. I did what I've been doing for so long and nobody cared. So now people actually like wanna know what I'm up to or they care what I have to say.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
Well, also it's like I think that what late night helps you do
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
eventually is is not be as precious because i feel like there were there have been jokes where in whatever environment i was in the the head writer would even say i really like this joke we literally just don't have time so then you see how like it's not even always a a merit-based thing there are so many different things involved with what show gets created for an audience that they watch and enjoy
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
And so to be part of that is something special, but also taking away the lesson that I took away from it of like, oh, just because something doesn't get used doesn't mean that it wasn't good. Just because the outcome I wanted to have happen didn't happen doesn't mean that's a knock on me as a writer, as a comedian.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
So then when now it's all up to me and it's all my show, when I go out and I tour or when I post things online, I'm, I'm less precious with, I'm less precious with giving it away because I've had to be less precious with like losing it to a certain degree.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
Yeah. And so as soon as you see that, as soon as you see that presented, you know that, okay, this is CNN's take on the story. And then you watch more news and you maybe see an MSNBC or a Fox News story.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
And so, so that's kind of how I got here, which is why I say that like every experience that I've had that has led up to this moment has, has like, it felt like everything was to get me where I am now. And I'm sure where I am now is to get me somewhere else. So I'm not too stressed about like, I guess how I share that stuff.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
Because I feel like one, thankfully the feedback is letting me know I'm on the right track. But two, I look at what it was like when it wasn't my show and I wanted to get this joke out and it just wasn't possible. So I'm just grateful that people are enjoying and watching.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
news nation what whatever it is and they're all talking about the same thing but they either have different pundits on to discuss it or the the anchor themselves are giving the information to you in a very specific way and so all of it the the story as it exists is malleable enough that it's either funny how the thing is being reported or maybe there's a missing piece of context that is um
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
Yeah, I mean, I, sorry to let you down on both fronts. I have not. You take too many shots to remember them. Yeah, a little bit. A little bit. I definitely remember the feeling of Jimmy saying my joke for the first time, and it was on my first day as well. So it was such a great start. First day at the job, and I got a joke on. I was so excited about it.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
And then once again, the monologue team, the writers, not only... welcomed me with open arms starting out as this like kid that just got hired. But they also took the time, which I thought was really special to like some of them listen to my comedy album just to like try to get to know me ahead of time. And like it just it just felt like I was already welcomed in as soon as I sat down at my desk.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
And then and then the way that a few of them really like celebrated the fact that I got a joke on my first day and they were very like, Oh, that's great. Like like good. Good for you. You came in. You don't even know where the bathroom is. And you were able to get a joke or two on is like pretty big. So it's unusual. Yeah. So now now I really wish I would remember it.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
Yeah, no, it was a great question. I'm sorry that I let you and the listeners down.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
Oh, no. I think he would have got a real kick out of the fact that things were – things have gone so well and like he was so optimistically supportive from the very beginning. Like even when we were on the phone and I was telling him like, oh yeah, I've started doing a little bit of standup and stuff like that.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
And he was like, oh, we're like such a genuine interest and such an excitement about it that that would have been something nice for him to see, you know? Yeah, it's tough because losing my dad, and especially when I lost my dad, I feel like was also that sort of formative time because I was just really getting going career-wise and everything.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
And it really has shaped, at least to the best of my ability, how I treat people close to me and try to treat everybody... as much as humanly possible of like, you could like really lose someone. You could have the last conversation with somebody and not know what's gonna be the last one. And so it's important to like let people know how you feel and to be as generous as possible
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
with all of the good things that you have to say. You know what I mean? You never want to lose somebody and not have them know exactly how much you care about them, how much you enjoy their company, what they mean to you, all this stuff. And so like one of my, yeah, that was like one of my big,
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
like regrets i guess or like i i think everything happens on time but i i wish i would have started quote unquote like making it a little bit sooner so he could have seen some of it you know but you also can't learn until you learn what the impact is of grief changing your perspective on that because my guess is you were young and probably bulletproof enough to not
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
not likely to be talked about because it doesn't fit the sort of general narrative of that station. Or it's just maybe a misread, at least in my opinion. So then when I talk about it, I try to find the angle that hasn't been spent up. And then through doing that, usually there's already like a humorous bend to it. And then from there, you just add the jokes, as many as possible, wherever you can.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
Yeah, I think therapy... Okay, there are two things that I think are important about therapy. One, I think that even if you have...
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
what you feel like is a handle on an issue or some problems or something like that i do think that talking it out sometimes like i sometimes i will really think i know how i feel about something and then when i talk to anybody about it having to say out loud the thing that i've been thinking in my head is a different barrier to break than um than people recognize sometimes uh it's sharing versus being alone with something exactly exactly and so it's like i think that
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
While therapy doesn't replace these things, I do think we're in this sort of era of isolation. We're living in like an epidemic of loneliness. And so I think therapy sometimes is just the first step in like, it's not necessarily quite the same as community building, because I understand it's like you go in there, you pay a therapist, this person's being paid to listen to you.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
So it takes a little bit of the... softness and the sweetness out of sharing sometimes, I guess, because there's a little bit of money involved. But at the same time, I think that even people who have community, who have whatever their religious leader is or who do have people to talk to, sometimes you have your people to talk to about certain things and not that you should be
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
putting everyone in buckets, but like, here's someone who is not, it's literally their professional job to not judge you or to not bring any preconceived notions about you when you share something. And so I think that therapy is important for those two reasons. One,
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
lot of people don't have someone to talk to even if you have someone to talk to sometimes they're not the person you want to share that thing with because you're worried about them looking at you differently or no matter how much they say they won't judge there's something about what you have to say that carries a certain weight that can't be taken back so I think it's good for for those two main reasons but I'm also like I
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
I don't know how to put this without sounding like I'm anti-therapy now, but I do think that therapy is only, to me, worth it with the effective practice of what you do outside of it. And so I think that, you know, I've known people who have been in therapy for years and they're still like kind of jerks. And it's not a...
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
It is not as if it is a chemical imbalance thing or prescription thing or it's like, no, you go to therapy and then you tell your therapist how you were terrible to everybody and then you don't change the behavior. Feels like therapy is not really working for you. It almost feels like you're not going at this point if you're just going to go and.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
And it's also like I'm not saying it as if it's some sort of catch-all. For me, I looked at it as like I do think it could and does at times help me become even better at what I do because – like you said, with tools, right? Either give you the tools or show you the tools. I think the same way that a drill will never be a hammer, like not really.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
and you tag it all up and then you've now brought something new over something that could have already felt a little bit played out or old because the news cycle now with all of the like savviness that people have around the internet and where they wanna get their information and once they get it from there, they've sort of got it.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
You can use a drill as a hammer if you want and you can make a hammer a drill if you want. It's not going to be that effective. But if you go somewhere and they're like, this is actually a hammer, you should use this to hammer things. Now you and the tool are more effective. And that's kind of how I look at it is that, It's not as if I go every week or even every month.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
I think that I have a decent, and this may be misguided of me, but I do think I have a decent,
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
barometer for when i should be going and when it's time to talk to somebody and when it's you know when i feel like all right like i do it's not about going until you feel okay because you can still go and feel okay i think it can still be very important but i think knowing when it's serving you versus like you're just doing it to do it and so i feel like sometimes if i think i'm gonna be just going to like
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
do it in a way that's not productive. I do take a little break, you know.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
I mean, I don't know how new it is, but I know it's been building up and it needed something like the pandemic to fully be exposed because I think that before anyone was ever talking about anything 2020, even in 2016, you could feel a little something like bubbling up and there were just practices that we had of like how social...
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
had the opportunity to connect everyone as far as like all the apps, all the different ways of communicating. But then all of it was also very isolating in and of itself. You could feel like you had had a bunch of little interactions with people all day while not having a single intimate conversation with anyone.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
And so I think that that's something that I think was gearing up that just like I mean, even even if you want to talk about pollution, 2020 exposed a lot of stuff because just people being like inside for two months and not having the air and the pictures, the aerial pictures of cities was like incredibly clean. It looked like whole cities were healed in a month, you know?
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
And so I think that as far as an epidemic of loneliness, there are certain practices that are going to be really hard to get out of just because it's human nature. Like for instance, even with the phone, there's that phantom reach. Have you heard about that?
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
So if you get your news from like, let's say Facebook or Twitter or something like that, it's very easy to get 50 different angles in the matter of 10 minutes, just reading down a thread. And so I think that's one thing that whether you want to call it mainstream media or legacy media has not caught up to is that there's never going to be a way for them to give the information as fast as social.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
The Phantom reaches this thing where let's say you are on like a cruise ship and you have no reception and your phone is useless and you have all these people around you to talk to.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
Even if you are, whether you're a kid or you're middle-aged, there will be times throughout the day, just because of how much we're on our phones, that you'll reach for your phone and you may even open it and then be like, oh wait, yeah, I can't do anything with this. And those are some of the only indicators that we have of how much we're actually on our phone. Because if you ask someone,
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
how much they're on their phone. They might say a lot, or they might give you a certain like metric, but it wasn't until Apple itself decided to expose our screen time and tell us every week how much we had been on our phone, that people really got a glimpse of like, oh wow, like five hours a day. And it's not, and especially if their phone isn't how they do their job.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
You know, that that that really tells you something. And so I think that the epidemic of loneliness is here. And I don't I don't know when it's going to go away. But I think that when you build community and you build culture around connection, I think that you you start to have like little seeds that you plant that will bloom later.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
That will be a practice of like, OK, maybe I'm on my phone, but I'm on my phone talking to this new friend that I made that that I enjoy the company of, even if it's online.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
that I that I trust with things about myself and that I can set up a time to maybe meet in person and spend time together in real community and connection in my home or so something make a memory with this person because I don't think it's bad I know people in from all different walks of life who are like for whatever reason cut off from community right maybe maybe they don't feel like anyone around them gets them maybe they just feel like yeah that's sort of odd one out
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
And so it takes the Internet to connect them with another odd one out somewhere else. And then though and then those two passes for intimacy, 100 percent. And sometimes it is the placeholder that people need. So I'm not saying it's it's all or nothing.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
I think that sometimes it is how you build the connections that are going to get you that at next level, that that sometimes even saves your life, because then when you do maybe, let's say, move out of your hometown, or you get the opportunity to see this person in person. That's the real, like, you know, in real life experience stuff that we need from like a biological sense even.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
Yeah, absolutely. So I think that the... To me, it's something that now more people are catching on to. Like with a lot of things, I think more or less, obviously there's like disinformation everywhere, but I think that because of how people feel, people are waking up to things that you wouldn't have been able to convince them of maybe seven years ago. You know what I mean?
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
I think it took things like the pandemic, and I think it took having to like... Even if you, I mean, I know it was different per state, but like all around the world with some of these lockdowns, I'm not even talking about necessarily the merits of lockdown or the efficacy of like just it saving lives and stuff.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
I'm talking about in the actual practice of a lockdown, there were a lot of people who had to, for the first time ever, especially as Americans with how much we work and how much we are constantly stimulated and how much we create, that had to like stop and like maybe take a good long, hard look at themselves.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
And that's not always, I'm not saying that that's like made the whole thing worth it or something. I'm just saying that by and large that happening, it made people realize, oh, I don't have any real friends. Like now that I'm not working and I just have to sit here for, remember when we thought it was gonna be two weeks? Remember that first like two weeks?
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
I just have to sit here for two weeks and I don't have anybody to call.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
And so adding the extra context of what everyone on social is saying about a story, then you also have... hopefully now an even finer needle to thread, but you'll really be saying something specific if you can manage to walk the tight rope of like what everyone's already said.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
I don't take calls on my phone.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
And remember, the first two weeks, people treated that like, oh, okay, it's going to be a little time off. Right? So then that first week was all well and good. People were like, oh, hey. It's so funny, too, because it was like...
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
People literally were like not using it for what it was supposed to be for because it was like two weeks we're going to shut everything down, see what happens with this whole little virus thing, right? And then people were like, man, two weeks off, come over to my house. I was like, ah, that's not quite it.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
I do think that after the first week when watching all the movies gets boring and like staying in every night and you finally have like an argument with your spouse or whatever. I think I think that like really being like trapped and having to sit with yourself was something that a lot of people weren't prepared for, obviously.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
But it's something that exposed a lot of the loneliness that people feel. And so coming out of that. You obviously want there to be the opportunity for people to connect, you know? And I think that that's a place where post-pandemic, post-lockdown COVID stuff, we're still failing people.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
because there should be more places to go just to be in community with people that aren't just church that aren't just um this like weekly occurrence somewhere you can go at any point that's not necessarily a bar that you can be in communion with people.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's like you're there with all these people, but now it's like, all right, even bars have their own dynamics where it's like, let's say I'm lonely, so I want to go to where people are, so I go to a bar. Well, now anyone you approach is, one, they're going to think you have some sort of agenda. I'm approaching you because I'm asking you out. Can I buy you a drink?
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
Whatever the thing is. When maybe you are just trying to strike up conversation, which sometimes is more off-putting. Sometimes people are like, oh, I'm just trying to be your friend. It's like, ah, get out of here.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
I think that every sort of established narrative that's been tried, that they've tried to create around him is failing because of people's disdain for the system. And so I think that's something that somehow a lot of news and a lot of like officials still aren't getting, you know? Cause I don't know if you saw the picture of him being escorted to the courthouse.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
They made it look like the dark night They made it look like a poster.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
And I'm like, that's such a absolute read on how they've misconstrued the situation. Because if you are... If you are an insurance company that's trying to gain favor with the people again, and this will never happen because there's boards and there's like C-suites and there's too much money at play to like do this. But I don't know if you remember when Earth Day was a big deal.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
So like we're talking like 2002, right? Earth Day was such a big deal.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
Yeah, because like Earth Day, I remember I don't know what company it was. I don't want to I don't want to lie on them, but I think it was like.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
walmart or something every company would have these earth day initiatives where they would be like we save this much uh energy or we use these fewer resources on earth day right now obviously what they're doing is that they're going bare bones for a day so that they can get the pr of like saving a little energy or whatever going bare bones for a day
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
But the problem is when they did that thing, people were like, oh, well, why don't you just do that all the time? Right. But if you're an insurance company trying to gain favor with the people again after something like Luigi, you could just be like, hey, we're cutting we're cutting everybody's rates for six months. I like I don't think people realize how little.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
people need who are already scraping by to survive. I don't think they realize how little they need to to go on longer. And I'm not saying this from a perspective of manipulation. I'm just saying it as someone who was in that situation of like, you don't really know where rent's coming from.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
You don't really know, you haven't like fully figured out how you're gonna like eat, especially eat well, right? You're just worried about the next meal. Someone giving you the opportunity to get ahead and get two meals ahead is huge. It's bigger than I think even a billionaire can fathom because a billionaire has all the money.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
A multimillionaire has all the money that they're ever going to need for the rest of their life. They actually can't spend it. They can't spend it in their lifetime.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
Yeah. And so I think that with Luigi, you know, I think that he's going to end up being more symbolic than anything he actually said in his manifesto or anything that he actually says in court.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
Okay, if you could pick anyone out of a history book and actually have a conversation with them that was in any form, and I'm not necessarily calling Luigi a revolutionary, but I'm saying pick a revolutionary. Anyone that you've picked in your head and you actually got to sit across the table from them and have lunch, I think it would be a pretty disappointing lunch.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
I don't think that like, do you know what I mean? Like just because they were an inspiring person.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
Yeah, they're just like, oh, I was dodging bullets. Like I wasn't trying to, I was trying to like live, you know? And so I think that no matter what Luigi is actually like as a person and no matter what happens with his actual case, I think that if you make any person, if you pull any person out,
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
and and you separate them from what they are symbolic of and have a real conversation with them they're gonna let you down in some form right because there are already people that like weirdly I only say weird because I understand the logic, not because I'm I'm saying you have to believe what I believe.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
But there were even people who weirdly were like on the CEO side again when they found out Luigi actually came from money. Like there's always going to be there's no perfect.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
Yeah. So so I think that, hey, with Luigi. That court sketch artist is going to have their work cut out for them, not making him look hotter and hotter every picture. It's going to be tough, you know, because even I don't know if you saw that.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
Did you see the one that when they took the picture of him just I think it was just his arraignment and he was looking over his shoulder and he was brooding. I was like, what is he doing?
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
Like, honestly, I feel like.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
Like, they low-key, just to break him even, they're literally going to have to put that Hannibal Lecter thing on him just so you can't see as much of his face. Because every time, every picture, he's just like... This smoldering. Yeah. And I'm like, who smolders over being on trial for murder? You would not catch me smoldering at all. I would be crying.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
I'd be in there like, hey, I'll snitch on anybody. I didn't do it. Please. This man is over here quiet. And then he'll cut a smile to his lawyer for a second. They get a picture of the smile. It's like.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
Yeah. So I know that when it comes to sports, I only know how the ball should be shaped. Do you know what I mean? That is a baseball. That is a football, right? So you don't know, but you know who Tyreek Hill is? Well, I knew Tyreek Hill. I knew the Dolphins. I knew the arrests that happened.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
And I feel like, all right, I do think that once again, just like we started talking about billionaires and money and stuff like that, I do think that there is a certain amount of money that... at least in your mind allows you the privileges of like moving the way you've seen other people move or the way you think they move, right?
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
Yeah. So I think I think one thing that's really interesting about Elon Musk, at least today in the day that we're talking in the minute right now, is that while he's trying to do all these things that you would at least think have some some sort of influence on how he's going to run his business and some overall profit that he's that he's
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
Because when you watch the whole video, I even talked about it on stage. It's like, I said all of my like, big, big thoughts about on stage, which is probably more than you have time for. But I think- About what?
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
Yeah, I talked about him and I talked about the police because I think that even the way it started is like, it starts in this way that's like, did you watch the whole video? Yes. Yeah. So initially it's like, boom, boom, boom, lowers his window. Don't tap my window like that.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
And I'm like that to me, that's like, all right, I understand you a millionaire, but now I'm very nervous that when you hit that button like that, I mean, I've hit it before on people. I've never hit it on the police. Right. But then you get the police pulling them out of the car and like and like sitting them down and everything and and, you know, getting them on the ground and stuff.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
And there's some of it you can tell there's there's a shade of it in there.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
that's just like you hurt my feelings you disrespected me and now you have to pay in some form even though that thing in and of itself is not illegal right and then you also saw people trying to check on what was going on and the way they even spoke to those people or the or the fact that they were going to arrest everybody who stopped and asked the question hey we're head to practice what he do can I can I help can I mediate in some way and so it does make me nervous that there is no
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
It's a scary thing when there's no mediation with the person who's supposed to be keeping the peace. I think that that is something that needs to be addressed in every police department, no matter what. It's like the same way that like you as an individual, right? You might be like righteously indignant. You might be ready to let somebody have it.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
You talking to them in the parking lot and you're just like, and I'm talking about, there's a very different thing when you point like this and you point like this, right? Like you're doing this point and you're over here. Hey, hey, hey, right? And now you turn around and all these cameras are pointed at you. All these cell phones are pointed at you.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
You as a regular person, that makes you go, maybe I'm being out of pocket right now. Maybe I seem crazy. And the fact that like there is no as a collective people around an officer who are trying to get involved. Once again, I'm not talking about somebody trying to like start a fight with a cop or attacking a cop or, you know, cursing at a cop or anything.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
I'm talking about if everyone around you, if you're a police officer and you're throwing somebody on the ground and you're putting your, you know, your knee on their back or whatever, and everyone around is like, hey, hey, hey, hey. I think that there's this thing there in in policing sometimes where.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
planning for the future on like if he can get the right contracts, if he can get the right H-1B visas from Trump and just get his blessing for to move his business however he wants, then I think anyone who is like capitalist in their mindset can understand why he's doing that.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
to back down or to stop or to like mediate the situation is to admit some sort of guilt to be wrong. And it's not that at all, you know, because as a as a cop, I'm not a cop and I haven't been in cop light situations. But I imagine sometimes you show up and you don't know what's going to happen. That's what that's my general takeaway from what policing is like. You show up.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
You have no idea what's going to happen. That's why they give you the gun. Maybe we're at a 10 out of 10 situation. Maybe we're at a one out of 10. We're gonna give you the gun no matter what, right? So you show up and you have the gun and you don't know if it's gonna be a one or a 10 out of 10. You never know. And then you find out through talking to someone, it's actually a five.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
All right, we're at a five. I don't even need the gun, right? But if you show up to everything or you take everything, maybe it was a five and then you yourself took it to a 10 because you were like, this looks like a 10. I'm gonna go ahead and just pull the gun so everybody knows I'm ready for a 10.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
That's the type of stuff that I feel like, at least in rhetoric and in the process of policing, I think is dangerous because I'm like... I'm a pretty passive person. I try to understand all sides of a thing, but I also can see where in that specific situation where it became less about, here's what you did wrong, here's where you broke the law, or here's the citation I need to give you.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
And it became more about respect me. And I think that once we once we get into a place where it's all about respect me, that's where I'm talking about. You took it from it was a five and you made it a ten. And in this in this case, anytime is traffic. It should be a three. Like, sure. If you're speeding, you could have hit somebody. You could have killed them. This is why I pulled you over.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
You were speeding. I give you your ticket. Don't don't be a jerk. Right. Right. But like, I don't know. I feel like. Sometimes things get taken to a 10 that were so clearly a two.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
What's hard to understand is that while he's doing all of this stuff, he's been lying to the gamer community about being maybe the number two or three gamer in the world in a very like in a in a in a very encapsulating game. Like you need hundreds and hundreds of hours to even be good at this game. And he said that he was like top three in the world. And then he got exposed for lying about it.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
Yeah, and I think that's where the thing deviates from me because I'm like, okay, if you are a police officer, the best way I can describe at least the public's perception of you is that you are in like the peacekeeping business of customer service, right? Like I call you when somebody's in my house, but it's still like this customer service position, right? And-
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
And I don't know if you've ever worked customer service, but I've worked in restaurants. I've worked in grocery stores. And sometimes I get the do you know who I am? And then I have to be like, I don't know who you are, but I still have to do my job because then now I cannot now be out of pocket because they were rude to me.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
Like I'm working at a grocery store and they hit me with the do you know who I am? And if I'm like, you know what? I don't really care who you are. It's 1784. And I told you I have changed for 100. So either come up with a 20 or get out of here. that gets me fired. That's right. You know? So it's like, I totally, I totally get that.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
And that's why the roll up window thing for me, I was just like, Oh, I was like, my man. Oh no. Like I thought it was going to be a way worse video when somebody was like, have you seen the Tyreek Hill thing? And I started watching it and I, the, Because it went up a couple times. It didn't go up just once. There's a thing with once. Once is I'm rich, right? Once is like I'm a rich man.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
I could see Jeff Bezos, Elon hitting them with the once, right? They wouldn't be driving themselves. No, they would not be. But like I could hear them from the back of my head. I could hear them tell the driver to roll up the window and he nervously goes, I'm so sorry. Yeah. That being said, rolling up multiple times, that's a rough move. It's aggressive. I was like, oh, no. That's money.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
Yeah, because, like, also... Tyreek Hill's not necessarily the most sympathetic guy to like go to bat for anyway. So then I was like, I mean, there's no perfect victim, but at the same time I was like, guys, if this is the same guy I've heard about with other things, now you got me.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
Thanks so much. Thanks for having me.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
proximity to... They're all high school kids. Still needs to feel cool to people who... I know gamers who are like, I really am not doing anything else. I don't know why he needs to impress me. That feels weird. And so then I feel like that becomes your angle. You go down the thing of like, this man is going to be able to
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
get whatever tax breaks he wants, tax breaks he doesn't need because he's already the richest man in the world. And yet somehow there's still a part of him that's like, I really wish I took this person to the dance. It's like that to me shows me a few things. One, that like he's not really this like big, scary monster, evil genius or anything. He's like a kid. He's like a hurt kid.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
And then two, clearly I don't need all the money in the world because the dude with all the money in the world
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
is like still hung up about stuff that i feel like i've let go of and so now you have your angles where maybe unless they've been beat down you now have something where it's like here's an interesting thing or here's the thing that is a completely unrelated story but it's about elon so it adds context to the other thing would you do this with bezos as well if i offered you that as the second uh... item for your uh... chewing on uh... just just just jeff bezos yes so
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
I mean, right now, he's kind of like the quietest of the three tech billionaires who have really buddied up to Trump. I mean, in different forms, like Elon kind of came in hard and was like, I'll help you campaign and I'll show up to rallies and stuff like that.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
Zuckerberg was a little bit more recent and he kind of came out complaining about Biden and about being, you know, what he felt like was sanctioned and
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
and uh being censored and stuff and now he's all seemingly um potentially pro-trump i'm not gonna put that on him if it's not true but it seems like he's really uh gung-ho about like getting into like the mega culture and then uh bezos who has been the quietest all he's supposedly done is killed like one endorsement of uh kamala harris from washington post so now to me bezos is like
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
the one who's the most gently trying to get in. He's got his seat at the inauguration. But other than that, he's kind of chilling. And I think Bezos, among all of these people, is the one who believes in space as the real option. I think he might dip. We may one day not see Bezos anymore and wonder what happened. And he's been on Mars for like a year.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
That's what I think about Bezos, what I think about, because he's really like the quietest moving of all these people. Even when he got ripped, he got ripped quietly. He got ripped the way Chappelle got ripped. Remember when Chappelle was like doing Chappelle's show and he was skinny? And then like eight years passed and he was just, there was that picture of him on a skateboard.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
I saw him in Miami down here. His arms were enormous. Yeah. Bezos did the same thing. This dude was like kind of balding, trying to sell books on the internet. And then he became really rich and then he shaved his head fully, which is a good move.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
Yeah, yeah. I think it's, you know, one, I think a billion dollars is generally too much money. I don't see how... Like one credit that I'll give some billionaires is that I can't imagine a world where like a normal person, which a lot of these people aren't normal people.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
They've kind of hidden the million dollar, multi-million dollar or background of loans that they got to like prop them up to at least project to this sort of success, right? But let's say you are a normal guy and you come up with a good business and you get investors and you do your series of investing and everything like that.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
Then you you hit this like billion dollar valuation, which still doesn't mean you have a billion dollars. It just means your company, if somebody bought it today, would be valued at about a billion dollars, which might not even be what you get. Somebody might try to undercut you.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
But then you build up to the multibillion dollars to the point where now you can live off of your own stock and not pay any taxes because you're you're living in debt. Right. Because you're living off of a loan from when you sell your stock. Right.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
All of that being said, I think that the fact that no human needs and no Maslow's hierarchy of needs goes away with enough money is kind of why I'm good chilling where I'm at. It's like, I'm good wearing the same thing every day. I think that is one thing I've seen Bill Gates do is wear the same thing every day. I'm like, that's just easier. Right?
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
And so I don't know how more of these people, they're clearly, some of them are out of their minds, but I'm surprised they're not more out of their minds in like a let's try crack sort of way. You know what I mean? Like you already can afford everything. I don't know why you need to go to space. I do wonder why more of them aren't doing like the most insane drugs.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
Like develop me a drug and I'm going to take it. I'm going to get very high. I don't know if I would do that if I was a billionaire, but I'm surprised more billionaires aren't doing that exact thing. How about Diddy? You know, there's...
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
Yeah. Well, I mean, out of everything you've asked me, Diddy has the most. So I do feel like one, I'm still wondering who else is like nervous about the trial. Someone who hasn't been arrested, someone who hasn't been subpoenaed because it was Diddy at parties. These were parties. And I don't know about you, but I've never partied with like three people. Lots of people are at these parties.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
So people know things that haven't been asked yet. And they're very worried about being asked. And so I feel like when I look at Diddy updates, I'm more thinking about where Diddy is in the process of like getting to trial and all that stuff. But I know that there are some people just looking at every update, just holding their breath, hoping their name comes out. How could they not be?
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
Diddy's lawyer has maybe the most work cut out for him in the history of law, because I don't know how a lawyer, already they've made one claim that the tapes that Diddy was making of people, without their knowledge, by the way, is somehow proof that everyone there was consenting. And I'm like, that's so, I'm not a lawyer.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
But that seems so wildly out of pocket to make as a claim that I'm like, maybe I could be a lawyer. Like it gives me hope that if you could just say whatever and hope it sticks, then if that's what law is.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
Yeah, I mean, you do your best, but I just feel like with Diddy, it's like you... I'm surprised they're not trying to plead everything. Like the fact that they're like, my client is innocent. Why would you say he's innocent? Ah, that to me is like the most jarring. Like if I was Diddy and I was watching my lawyer, I'd be like, ah, ah, ah, ah.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
Like, obviously, you then being caught would wish that you didn't do any of the stuff that you did. But at the same time, now someone has to defend you. And, like, it is hard to come up with something because then the most out-of-pocket questions are being asked of Diddy's lawyer because of what Diddy is accused of and or did, you know?
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
South Beach Sessions - Josh Johnson
So then they'll be like, why was Diddy here at this time with this person? And then, like, even, like... The thing with Kid Cudi's car is genuinely insane. The thing that like before Diddy was ever arrested and then somebody's like, hey, I think Diddy blew up Kid Cudi's car. And then Kid Cudi is like, look, more than likely. I was like, how? Guys, how do you?
This American Life
851: Try a Little Tenderness
Okay, this is like... It's like a contentious thing. So just stick with me for a second. Because it's weird that people are weird about it. Okay. So my friends are having kids, right? A lot of them are starting to have kids. So they're all having the conversation about if they're going to spank their kids, right? And people have very strong feelings either way.
This American Life
851: Try a Little Tenderness
Some people think like, oh, you know, if it's rare... And if it's warranted, then like a spanking here and there is not that bad. And then some people are like, no, this is like this is full on abuse. This is like you're creating trauma and everything. And I'm not even telling anybody how to feel like I know that I was spanked when I was a kid. Right.
This American Life
851: Try a Little Tenderness
And and it made sense that I was spanked because we were poor. Do you understand what I mean? Like, there was nothing to take away. You know? Like, there was a year that my mom and I shared a bedroom when I was a little kid. What was she gonna take away? The floor? It's like, rest of the month you float from now on. And if I catch you not floating, that's your ass, all right?
This American Life
851: Try a Little Tenderness
Do you see what I mean? Because I was in a very weird position at one point, because I didn't have much money, but I got a scholarship, and my family pulled their money together to make the ends meet for me to go to this Catholic school, right? So I was a kid with no money going to school with kids with real money. Like... Like money where they don't need to read. You know what I'm talking about?
This American Life
851: Try a Little Tenderness
You know that proper money that you can't mess up? You know that old money? And so, you know, I remember there was one time we were... We were sitting around the lunch table, and this one kid, I said something about my mom spanking me for something, and we were still in junior high or whatever, so I was talking about a time from before, you know?
This American Life
851: Try a Little Tenderness
And then this other kid was like, oh, don't worry about it, you know, my dad still spanks me, right? And I was like, ooh. Um... Tyler, you have a pool, that's abuse. I feel like no matter your, no matter your feelings on spanking, we've all met, we've all met like a grown man that deserved to have their ass beat.
This American Life
851: Try a Little Tenderness
And I think the thing for me, the thing for me is that when could it have happened earlier? And I want to be clear here. I'm not like blanketing, cosigning anything. I'm asking questions genuinely. I'm asking questions because people are very split on it. You know what I mean? But once again, we've all met a dude who like... He really probably had it coming sooner than today.
This American Life
851: Try a Little Tenderness
But then how do you... How do you gauge that, you know? Because I get what some people are saying. Some people are like, look, we're all individuals. So even though you have your kids and your kids have a part of you in them, there's still going to be different people.
This American Life
851: Try a Little Tenderness
So then how do you make sure that this kid doesn't walk away with the worst lesson possible, the worst feeling possible from this thing that, like, worked out for you, but it might not work out for them? That's a scary thing, you know? Like, okay, I used to... I used to be very nervous about moving to New York.
This American Life
851: Try a Little Tenderness
I moved to New York years ago, and I remember when I got to Brooklyn, I saw a fight when I got there. These were two kind of big guys. One guy was medium-sized, bigger than me, and he was muscular, and he looked like he knew how to fight because he did all the stances. He knew where to put his shoulders, put his fists, he could kick.
This American Life
851: Try a Little Tenderness
He's either trained MMA and boxing or he's watched all the movies. Like, this guy... This guy really knows how to move, right? And then the big guy was just a big guy. Like, he was that... You know that type of big where you can't tell if it's fat or muscle? You just know it's in the way, right? You know that he can move things where he wants them to go. Just a big guy, right? And...
This American Life
851: Try a Little Tenderness
I don't know exactly what they were fighting about, but it felt like one of those fights. It felt like one of those fights where they really wanted to fight their dad. Have you ever been, okay, have you ever been in a bar and then you see a fight, like you can smell it brewing, and then you're also like, I think if you would like,
This American Life
851: Try a Little Tenderness
punched your dad years ago none of this would be happening right now like you just had one good row with him this would be a quiet evening right and uh And they were going at each other. And some of it was punching, some of it was kicking. Now, the guy that was on the bigger side and muscular, he really knew his way around. He was even doing the hop of someone who knows how to fight.
This American Life
851: Try a Little Tenderness
You know that little light foot hop where you're like, they're about to get into it? OK. And then there was one moment, because I walked out of this bar because I was doing a show, like a bar show with my friends, and then we were all walking out, and we all saw this, like, happening. It would start on the sidewalk, and it spilled into the street.
This American Life
851: Try a Little Tenderness
And basically, you know, he's doing the hops, and he goes for a lunch. He goes for, like, this big punch, right? And when he goes for the big punch, the big dude moves out of the way and grabs his wrist. And they both look at it. They both look at it like... He grabs his wrist and looks at it, and then he looks at it like, uh-oh.
This American Life
851: Try a Little Tenderness
And... And then... And then he grabs his wrist, and with his other hand, he grabs the back of the dude's belt, right? Pulls him forward, knocks the guy pretty much off balance, lets go of the wrist, passes the belt to his other hand, lifts him up, and then... spanked him in public. I had never seen somebody with a beer get spanked before. And he's really like floating and everything.
This American Life
851: Try a Little Tenderness
And this guy is like letting them have it, right? Like one after the other. This dude spanked him so much he took a break. There was one point where he was holding him suspended in the air by his belt, but also like... And then after like the 36th lick... Let's go with the belt. Dude drops to the ground. He gets up and he sort of limps off. A lot of expletives and stuff. But it's kind of done.
This American Life
851: Try a Little Tenderness
And this guy goes back into the bar we were just in. Because he wasn't watching the show. The show was in like a back room. This guy was just in the bar. And I had no idea what the fight was about. Because once again, we had already walked out and it was already happening. But he walked back in and I'm like... I'm a curious duck. You know what I mean?
This American Life
851: Try a Little Tenderness
Like... So I go back in after him, and I'm like, hey, man, are you okay? Which is a weird thing to ask him, but... It's like, are you okay? What was all that about? And then he turns to me and goes, I look like a lot of dudes' dads. Like... Because the dude was like 30, and he looked like he could be a dad, right? And so he's like, no, I just look like a lot of dudes' dads.
This American Life
851: Try a Little Tenderness
And I was like, wow, how did you find that out? And he was like, oh, yeah, you know, after the fourth or fifth fight, you start to put things together for you. And he told me, he told me that sometimes he goes to the bar with his friends and, you know, he's like, after a while, I can just tell some guy starts looking at me and then he comes and he starts jawing at me.
This American Life
851: Try a Little Tenderness
And I can tell it's not about me because it's, I was just sitting here. I wasn't doing anything. And then he wants to fight and he either swings at me first or he says, let's go outside. But this happens pretty often. Yeah. And I was like, wow, are you a dad though? And he was like, yeah. I was like, do you spank your kid? He was like, oh no, no, I would not.