Unashamed with the Robertson Family
Ep 1073 | Phil Reunites with Miss Kay & the Robertsons Cause a Ruckus for the Other Patients
Fri, 11 Apr 2025
Phil and Miss Kay are finally back together again, and the joy between them is unmistakable—though their peaceful reunion quickly turns into chaos when the entire Robertson clan crowds in for visits. Jase finds himself in a storm of his own, as bad weather outside stirs up an even bigger argument between him and Missy inside. Along the way, he learns that their habit of hashing things out in public might, oddly enough, be a sign of a healthy relationship. The guys and Jill reflect on how often we miss the bigger picture of what Jesus is doing because we’re too focused on finding the easy way out. In this episode: John 6; John 8, verse 14; Mark 8, verses 14-21 “Unashamed” Episode 1073 is sponsored by: https://vom.org/unashamed — Request your free copy of When Faith is Forbidden today by visiting the website or by calling 844-463-4059. https://meetfabric.com/unashamed — Join the thousands of parents who trust Fabric to help protect their family. https://identityguard.com/unashamed — Get a 30 day free trial AND 60% off today! https://puretalk.com/unashamed — Get 50% off your first month when you make the switch! Listen to Not Yet Now with Zach Dasher on Apple, Spotify, iHeart, or anywhere you get podcasts. — Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Chapter 1: What is Phil and Miss Kay's reunion like?
I am unashamed. What about you?
Yeah, we'll break the fourth wall here. And this is so that the key is if you're in the Robertson family. which we all are, even though I'm a Dasher. Same thing with Dashers, too, though. We've got the same problem.
I am not in the Robertson family.
Well, you're married to me, so you are by marriage. One plus one.
This is the same point of reference. The two will become one.
See, right now, there was an opening. This will be great. There was an opening right there that if I had taken it, all the negative energy could have shifted to Jill. She would have been the scapegoat. So it's called the scapegoat mechanism. The key is you cannot allow yourself to be the focal point of the energy of the group.
Because then once it happened, like the last podcast, I became the focal point and then all the negative energy. Because I willed it to happen.
It wasn't accidental. You never end up there.
But it became the focal point when you weeded your wife out.
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Chapter 2: How does the Robertson family cause chaos during visits?
We'll call him Dr. Langhofer. Or his dad called him Cliffhanger. Yeah, Cliffhanger. Oh, Cliffhanger.
Langhofer, Cliffhanger. Funny, actually. But I said, you know, the difference in our relationship and other marriage relationships is because we fight just like other married people do. We just have our fights in public. Yeah.
Which is, that's why Missy and Jill are two of my favorite guests on the Unshamed podcast because I love to nurture that spark.
You're very good at it. You bring the best out.
Yeah, exactly. Dr. Langhofer brought that out one night because Missy and I were disagreeing about something, but it was a room full of people. And he said, Jace, now that is a sign of a very functional great marriage. And I was like, the fact that you're not trying to be something that you're not, you just have your disagreement. You were comfortable to do it in front of people.
I wasn't thinking, oh, people are going to walk away and thought they fight like cats and dogs. I mean, I didn't. We had a disagreement. Now, when I'm saying disagreement, there's no profanity. We just have a difference of opinion.
Yeah.
And so we will take a time out.
Well, I would say that I'm actually not comfortable with it, but I think Jill's comfortable with it. I kind of feel uncomfortable, but she'll go there in public. She don't care. When we lived here, we had a house church with Paula and John Godwin, by the way. Two of my favorite people.
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Chapter 3: What does Jase learn about arguing in public?
Oh, I just like, yeah, I left.
Well, then Jill walks in like during house church, like 25 people. And she's out on hills and it's like clicking through the house. Look, he still remembers.
He still remembers the clickety clack of those hills.
I was back when I used to wear heels all the time. I mean, I was owning every step.
You're representing the rider of the white horse. Now the horse hooves are clicking.
Now you would just slip in nice and quiet. But back in those days, it was clippity-clop.
I didn't make it known.
She made it known.
He's been teaching, and then he just stopped.
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Chapter 4: How does fighting in public reflect a healthy relationship?
And so during this process, we're now able to have visitors, you know. And so we have friend groups. They call them the kingdom groups. Kay's kingdom, you know, cause she had friends visiting her and then Phil had his kingdom group, you know, guys coming up there, fixing him fish, but they're in a facility where there are other people, but they have their own little private room.
You know, it's great. And so they're helping each other. And so that's been positive. But the challenge has been, we have so many people coming up there, we're being disruptive. So we'll have to address that later.
I've got to tell y'all a little story. So Melissa and I, Zach's sister, went up to visit them yesterday. And they were so cute. It was such a great visit. But Phil...
so Kay you know Kay's always had real dark hair right she always has her hair done no matter what she has her hair done well in all this process it's been several weeks since she could get her hair done and so they've been apart now they're back together and
She's had kind of a Cruella de Vil look here lately.
It's like white, and then it's white. And so we're sitting there talking, talking, and every probably 15, 20 minutes, Phil looks up, and he'll say, what's Kay got going on, that half-devil hair? Yeah. That half-devil hair. And he, I mean, in his state, he still notices something's off. And, of course, Kay is like, well, I'm sorry, Phil. I haven't got my hair done.
You know, but cricket wasn't good.
There they are, fighting in public, right? How often do you do an ad where you're giving something away? Not very often. We're normally asking you to buy something, but in this case, we're saying receive this book right here, When Faith is Forbidden, 40 Days on the Front Lines with Persecuted Christians, from our friend Todd Dettleton at Voice of the Martyrs.
Al, you've got a copy of this book as well.
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Chapter 5: What challenges arise from Phil and Kay being back together?
Which may or may not have been called some version of a fun sucker.
Yeah.
By them.
Well, I know who said that. Well, it was... Because Si says that every time I disagree with him.
So Si came out swinging, but Martin was like, well, I mean, he's kind of got a point.
Yeah.
Thank you, Martin, for being truthful. But I want to go on the record and say I love those guys over at that career. It was fun.
I did say, because I was telling you... Nobody asked me if I loved them. I love them, but I'm saying it's 49 minutes of nonsense and one minute of some truth.
I would concur. If there's anything, if the Tower of Babel on earth, it's in that room 20 feet over.
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Chapter 6: How do the Robertsons handle family dynamics in tough times?
So the word that, because I heard in all of my study, I heard this word used and I had to look it up. Because they said Jesus was basically given an ontological argument. And I thought, ooh, that sounds great. Now let me go look up ontological. So do you know what that means?
I bet Zach knows. Oh, he knows. He loves that one.
I didn't know I'd heard it before.
Zach was describing the Olivet Discourse. I went into the ontological.
The ontological, there is an ontological argument inside of apologetics that's very hard to understand. It's one of the few that I was like, ooh, that hurts my brain to think about it.
But it's helpful if you only use one big word per sentence. Yeah. So for you out there like me, I looked it up, and it was like the relational aspect of who Jesus is. He was representing himself because he's like, well, me and the Father, I'm doing this on the Father's behalf. Well, the Father. That means you're the son. You're the son of God.
And that was the problem that they weren't comfortable with that because they're like, well, you're a human. We know where you're from, which they bring that argument up.
Which is why I think he winds up just a little fast forward to the end when he says, eat my flesh, drink my blood. And it sounded so crazy, but from his perspective, he was telling them, it's about me. Oh, he's onto it.
It's going back to John 1, 14. That's it. The word became flesh. The same word that was in the beginning was with God and was God. He was with God in the beginning. Through him all things were made. I mean, that's why I'm walking on the water. That's why I'm bringing bread from heaven. I'm creator in a body.
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