Kick off Women's History Month with coverage from some of The Daily Show's best. Honor the fiendish women of history with Desi Lydic. Investigate why there aren't more female statues with Dulce Sloan. Discover some of the popular female inventions that men love. Celebrate (the very real) Black Women's History Day with Dulce. And fight back against the pink tax that costs women extra every day. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
Chapter 1: What is the significance of Women's History Month?
As you should know, March is Women's History Month. The month, that's right, the month when all historic female heroes drink for free. For more on this, we're joined by our senior gender issues correspondent, Desi Lydic, everybody. What does Women's History Month mean to you?
Well, Trevor, during this month, I like to celebrate the stories of impressive women that have been overlooked. It's not his-story, it's his-story. Took me forever to come up with that.
You know, Desi, I honestly have learned so much already this month about women who have done great things in history.
Chapter 2: Which overlooked women played significant roles in history?
Okay, yeah, but you see, everyone pays attention to the women who did great things, but no one speaks about women who did bad things. For example, everyone's heard of Benedict Arnold, right? He was the general who betrayed America during the Revolution, the greatest treason in our history up until Tristan Thompson. But you probably haven't heard of Benedict's wife, Peggy Shippen Arnold.
Now, she was actually the one who encouraged him to turn on America and help plan his treason with British officials. You know, it's like they say, the couple that betrays together stays together. And there is nothing hotter than treason sex, trust me.
I don't even know what that means, but that is really fascinating, Desi. I had no idea about the role that she played.
Oh, of course you didn't. You're a man. I didn't know either. I saw it on a Snapple cap at lunch today.
That's a weird snapple cap.
Yeah. Here's another one. We all know who Alexander the Great was, the ruthless king, bloodthirsty conqueror, sideburns aficionado. But he only got to do all of that because of a woman, his mom, Queen Olympias. She wanted her son to be king so bad, she had her husband and his other wife assassinated. She schemed so her child could have a better life, like a Macedonian Aunt Becky.
You know, actually, Olympias inspired me to break into my son's school and destroy the other kids' science projects. Sorry someone trashed your volcano, Timmy, but I too am raising a king.
Desi, you can't break into a school and vandalize children's homework.
Oh, wow. Trevor, you're gonna tell a woman what she can and cannot do with her body?
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Chapter 3: Why aren't there more statues of women?
Wow, this is really fascinating. You're opening my eyes. Like, even when it comes to bad things, we tend to erase the contributions of women from history.
Yeah, and it's still happening today. Just look at Facebook. Fake news scandals, helping Russia spread propaganda. They even sold all her dick pics to Steve Bannon. And every time something goes wrong, people blame Mark Zuckerberg. But their COO, Sheryl Sandberg, deserves just as much credit. Everyone's dragging his name through the mud.
I am so sick of people refusing to say something bad about women on the internet.
Desi, it almost sounds like you admire these bad women.
I admire all women. But there is one woman I admire above all. She is my number one evil heroine. I mean, I guess heroine's the number one evil heroine, but this lady comes close. Trevor, when you think of pirates, you think of Blackbeard, Captain Kidd, or whoever's the captain now. But the most successful pirate of all time was actually a woman, Zheng Yisao.
In the 1800s, she had 80,000 sailors, 1,500 ships, and took more pirate fortune than Johnny Depp's lawyers. But get this. When the Chinese Navy finally caught her, she talked her way out of jail, got amnesty, and then opened a casino. Boom! She went from being a criminal tyrant to a legal casino owner, a move historians call the reverse Donald Trump.
So remember, everyone, Women's History Month isn't just about breaking the glass ceiling. It's also about throwing someone through it and getting away with it.
Dulce Sloan, everybody! Hello! Happy Women's History Month. Happy?
It would be happier if you got me a gift.
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Chapter 4: What are some inventions by women that men love?
And why does Mother Goose get a statue? All she did was a goose!
I don't think that's right. Fine, she made love to a goose! No, that's not what, okay, anyway, Dulcé, I'm lost. How does having more statues help?
Because, Trevor, statues help us remember history. When you walk past a statue and you're like, oh yeah, MLK did have a dream. Thomas Jefferson was a complicated individual. And when you don't honor women the same way you honor men, you're leaving them out of history. That's true.
That's true. Well, at least women have the Statue of Liberty. That's one of the most famous statues in the world.
That doesn't count. We need statues of real women, not some giant French bitch holding an ice cream. No. Someone like Toni Morrison, the first black woman to win the Nobel Prize for Literature. Or someone like Frances Perkins, the first woman appointed to a presidential cabinet. Or someone like Beyoncé. The first woman to be Beyoncé. Why doesn't she have a statue?
I mean, she's already standing like a statue. She's ready.
This is actually a great idea, but I hope you understand, building thousands of statues of women is gonna be difficult. I mean, statues are expensive. You know, this is gonna be a project that's gonna take a lot of time.
Oh, I've already done it, Trevor.
What?
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