Episode #717: Bryan & Krissy return to the Mountain Monsters well for another action packed episode of grown men running around the woods pretending to be doing something! This time the boys count down their Top 5 chases of all time. It's part one of a two part MM breakdown. Join Bryan, Krissy, Chuck, Huck and Buck as they scream their way through hilarity. TCBit: WSHIT's consumer reporter Darlene Stinkhand gives advice to the citizens of Crabapple on how to weather the economic storm. Watch EP #717 on YouTube! Text us or leave us a voicemail: +1 (212) 433-3TCB FOLLOW US: Instagram: @thecommercialbreak Youtube: youtube.com/thecommercialbreak TikTok: @tcbpodcast Website: www.tcbpodcast.com CREDITS: Hosts: Bryan Green & Krissy Hoadley Executive Producer: Bryan Green Producer: Astrid B. Green Voice Over: Rachel McGrath TCBits: Written, Performed and Edited by Bryan Green To learn more about listener data and our privacy practices visit: https://www.audacyinc.com/privacy-policy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices
Chapter 1: What are the top economic tips from Darlene Stinkhand?
And it's 15 after the hour here in the Rod Cunningham Diesel Depot studio. A check of traffic and weather right around the corner. But first, let's check on the markets. They're doing terribly and crab appleans are obviously concerned about the economy. WSHIT's consumer reporter, Darlene Stinkhand, has a few pieces of advice for those getting the jitters around the economy.
The first thing on her list? Invest heavily in meme coin. She explains that meme coin is a low-risk, almost guaranteed return. Her second piece of advice? Pick up a second career. She explains that those signs on telephone poles where you can make $5,000 to $7,000 a week working from home are often true, and most people just drive by them.
She encourages listeners to go ahead and make that phone call and follow through. Some other advice from Darlene was to join your friend's MLM company. She explained that any company that makes you buy thousands of dollars worth of product you probably can't sell is a surefire bet to make millions and millions of dollars in extra income.
We were lucky enough to catch up with Darlene in the studio earlier, and here's some other advice she had for the listeners.
If you save your money, you can get stuff like a new living suit. It takes about a year to save up $3,000. I'm gonna get a new bedroom set. Yay! With lights on it. I hope I can be able to get it.
And finally, Darlene expressed that most people miss an opportunity to become millionaires by simply not attending those weekend real estate seminars. She shared that two days worth of your time and thousands of dollars in coaching services you'll never use was an opportunity to build a solid foundation of real estate knowledge and become the next billionaire tycoon.
Darlene will be back at the top of the hour to share some more wisdom. We'll be back after this commercial break.
I'm going to get a new bedroom set. Yay!
On this episode of The Commercial Break...
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Chapter 2: How do Bryan and Krissy introduce the episode?
Ah, yeah, cats and kittens, welcome back to the commercial break. I'm Brian Green. This is my dear friend and the co-host of this show, Chris and Joy Hoadley. Best to you, Chris. Best to you, Brian. And best to you out there in the podcast universe.
And happy day after the spring equinox.
Ooh, the vernal.
The vernal. The venereal equinox, as I like to call it. It's when my syphilis flares up every year around this time. Large robot. I got a large robot penis. Oh, yes. The spring equinox when the technically when the sun rays are directly over the equator and then it moves to the then it moves to start shining on the northern hemisphere just a little bit more than it has before.
That's why it's 31 degrees in Atlanta. Welcome to spring.
I know. It's been like 75.
I know.
That's all we talk about is how miserable we are about the weather. It's too hot. It's too cold. The pollen's out. The sun is out. I don't know. But one of my kids was very excited about the spring equinox. He was like, it's the first day of spring, Dad. And I was like, yeah. I'm still wiping your ass. What's going on there? Maybe this is the first day of not wiping your ass. How's that?
Because the older you get. The more manly your shit gets, the more I get disgusted. The other day I had to call Astrid. I was like, Astrid, I need your help on this one. I cannot deal with the smell. It is a man smell. Yes. Meanwhile, all 13 children are still visiting me in the morning in the tiny little cabinet that I have. Water closet or whatever you call it. They all come in. They file in.
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Chapter 3: What are the funniest moments from Bryan's family life?
But then, you know, daddy, I'm done.
You know, I'm like, okay, let me come. And I just walked in and walked right out. And I'm like, oh, no, no, no, no, Astrid. He's like, what's wrong? And I'm like, nothing. Don't worry about it. You're all good. It's all human. It's all there. One of my kids came in the other day. I picked him up from school and he was telling me about his day.
And he says, during a movie, we were watching a movie today. And during the movie, I had to fart. And he goes, so I farted and it was really loud. Yeah. And I go, oh, I was kind of laughing about it, you know, like, oh, that's a little embarrassing. But everybody farts. You can't hold it in. You're going to ruin your stomach if you hold it in.
You know, just say excuse me, you know, when you're done. And I go, did all the kids go, ew? And he goes, no, only two of my friends. And I go, well, why did they go, ew? And he goes, because they really don't like my farts. And I was like, well, who does? The other part of the class? Is it the other part of the class that does? Yeah. I'm not sure. I don't know how all that works.
It's been a long time since I've been at school. Well, speaking of, though, I was wondering when you said you went to go pick him up, have you encountered any blowback or anything from the tail of you and the construction workers or the –
Oh, that was a different school. So we have so many kids that they all go to different schools. They're all in different grades and different schools have different grades and all this. No, actually, when I went to the school, well, you know, and I know now that At all the places that I go, the cat's just out of the bag.
And certainly at Starbucks, the cat is way out of the bag because for the first time in 10 years, nine years of going there, someone said something to me directly. They asked me directly if I was, in fact, that guy from the commercial break. And I wanted to crawl. I wanted to die inside of a hole. I was like, ah, this is the one place where no one plays.
I mean, anywhere else in the world besides the places that I know people that you're not going to know about the commercial break. But the place that I go to, eventually curiosity kills the cat and they're trying to figure out what does that guy do? But no one has ever asked me directly, what do you do?
So anyway, so everybody at this school where this tree incident happened, these tree guys incidents happened, the tree incident.
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Chapter 4: How did Bryan's podcast become known at Starbucks?
There are some things, believe it or not, that I agree with with this current administration. And one of the things that at least was like tweeted about or tweeted or twatted or truth or whatever the fuck is going on. I don't know. Is that let's get rid of this time clock changing thing. And I couldn't be more in agreement with that sentiment. However, that is until I learned.
That our good friend Donald Trump doesn't want us to have more sunlight. He wants us to have less sunlight. He thinks the clock should stay backwards and not forward. Which is the original time. Which is the original time. Yeah.
But.
But.
Most people like it, right?
Yes.
More sunlight at night.
Don't you want to be at the lake at 7.30, 8 o'clock at night with an extra hour of sunlight left or at the ocean or whatever it is you do, wherever it is you do. I spent time in Costa Rica, close to the equator, in case you're checking a map geographically. It's a little closer than I am right now. I spent time in Costa Rica, and it's 12 on, 12 off, no matter the time of year. Almost.
There's little changes. But it's much closer to even Stevens, if you know what I mean. I like that. 12 on, 12 off. You think you like it, but the sun comes up at like 5.30 and 6 in the morning, and then it goes down at 5.36 at night. I don't like that. I don't want the sun to go down at 5.36 at night. No, I agree.
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Chapter 5: Why does Bryan dislike the time clock changes?
You can also find the entire commercial break library, audio and video, just in case you want to look at Chrissy, at tcbpodcast.com. Want your voice to be on an episode of the show? Leave us a message at 212-433-3TCB. That's 212-433-3822. Tell us how much you love us, and we'll be sure to let the world know on a future episode. Or you could make fun of us. That'd be fine, too.
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I'm Jordan Robinson, host of the new podcast, The Women's Hoop Show. We're here for you every step of the way through the mayhem of March Madness. Each episode, I'll be joined by a rotating group of women's basketball experts to talk you through how your bracket's looking and which rising women's hoop stars to look out for in every game.
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Okay, man, has it been a long time since we've done a Mountain Monsters.
Yes, it has.
I don't know, months at least. We probably haven't done any in 2020. Maybe we did one for the 12 days of TCB.
We had to.
I think so. And we'll probably do one for the 12 hours of TCB. Stay tuned. Okay, all right. So I'm just going to drop little hints here and there, but I think this one is coming together. I think this one we're definitely doing. Well, we have to now because we have people that are obligated to... We're obligated to have other obligations to have people do it. But anyway, 12 hours of TCB.
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Chapter 6: What makes Mountain Monsters a hilarious show?
Right up in there. Oh, right up in there. They're all pointing. They're all up in there.
Oh, yes, it was.
Guys. The hunt's on. Kill those lights and go to IR.
Kill those lights and go to IR.
What's IR? I don't know, but it sounds like we're watching NASA, like a SpaceX launch now. Kill the lights, go to AR. Capcom, go. Kill the lights and go to AR. Roger, Cap.
All right, that sounded like it was just right up the hill.
So wait, let me get this straight. They kill the lights on the camera, but every single one of them is illuminated with a headlamp. Okay, gotcha.
Hell yeah, that's not far.
I know Ken didn't expect to be out here doing tree knocks and actually get a response. Oh, tree knocks? What is a tree knock?
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