This week on That Was Us, Mandy, Chris, and Sterling break down all the family dynamics and emotional layers happening when the whole Pearson family visits Kevin at rehab and goes through therapy together. They chat about how introspection is uncomfortable and how motherhood can be the most rewarding but most challenging time. They also discuss “The New Big Three” (not to be confused with the That Was Us Big Three) and how Toby, Beth, and Miguel banded together in this episode. That Was Us is produced by Rabbit Grin Productions. Music by Taylor Goldsmith and Griffin Goldsmith. Follow That Was Us on YouTube, Instagram, Facebook, TikTok, Threads, and X! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Chapter 1: What happens when the Pearsons go to rehab?
On today's episode of That Was Us, we'll be discussing Season 2, Episode 11, The Fifth Wheel. The Pearsons gather under unexpected circumstances. Jack surprises the family with a trip to the Poconos.
If someone had told Charles and Melanie that after their Tinder match, they would start a channel with crazy tasks together. So really crazy. Spend five days on a lonely island, crawl down a zip line on a belt, crack one million views, climb a wall with a lot of buttons and jump off a parachute in Egypt? The two would never have believed that. But that's the thing with Tinder.
It takes you to places you would never have expected. Wherever it takes you. It starts with a swipe. Tinder.
You know, Sterling, bath time at my house used to feel like trying to get a cat into the water. I'd be out here making deals, bribing, you know, with more bedtime stories. You're negotiating like I was closing some kind of million-dollar deal just to get the kids into the tub.
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Chapter 2: How do family dynamics play out during therapy?
I wonder how often that happens in TV history where the audience gets to, I mean, that's a big. Yeah. That's a big effect. It is a big effect. It is a big effect.
And I love your enthusiasm. He's like, is that what we are now? Is that what we're doing?
Because that's what we're doing.
I love a good couple name. I love a good one, right?
Packing snacks for the plane, getting everything ready. Can we do our couple name? What's your couple name then?
So it would be- Mailer. Mailer.
Maybe, I don't know.
Mailer. Tandy. Tandy. Tandy.
Jessica Tandy.
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Chapter 3: What is the significance of the 'New Big Three'?
100?
100. 32-ounce cup at the cafeteria? Yeah. Three times. At least three of those a day. Now mind you, I was 6'4", 190 pounds. I was burning calories. I needed that much sugar just to stay awake for the amount of calories I was burning. But I don't know how you, like in these storylines with her, it's like, what are you gonna do? What are you gonna do?
I understand both perspectives, both parents, absolutely. And Rebecca only comes at it from love.
It's a place of love. And that's the important thing to put in it. Not a place of judgment and sort of body shaming or anything like that. It's like, I want my child to be the healthiest version of herself. And I want to sort of break that apart from diet culture, which has a preeminent emphasis on thinness as the sort of... standard result of healthiness.
And it's not always like, I think Madison being a part of the show and what we deal with later sort of exemplifies that perfectly, but just like, I want you to be healthy. And I know that like eating certain things all the time is not going to lead to the healthiest outcome.
And this like obsession with food, she seems to be obsessed. Like, like you said, all of her memories of the cabin and why she likes it is the popcorn and the s'mores. And it's like, Oh, we need to maybe separate that. From the experience.
But this is also what we get into in this episode. I don't know if we want to jump, jump that far into the family therapy session about what gets discussed, but it's like, there's a difference between, you know, like the nutritionist that we see has this one bite rule. Hey, you have one bite of whatever you want. Yeah. You have a craving? Taste it. Great. Leave it alone.
And that's fine for some people. Sure. But some people can't pick up. Once you pop. Yeah, once you pop, you can't stop. That goes for sugar. That goes for alcohol. It's like saying to an alcoholic, just have a sip. Right. And then leave it alone. Right. You know, and anybody who drinks a lot would say, what do you mean you have a beer and you go to bed? Right. That doesn't make any sense. Yeah.
They come in packs of six. For a reason. Come on now. You know what I mean? I do. And so this is then the discussion about especially and why childhood obesity is such a delicate topic because we attach... the things that we consume, whether it's food or whatever it is to change our physical being. And it gets attached to our emotional state or it can get imprinted, it can get encoded.
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Chapter 4: How does introspection affect family relationships?
And he starts, Kevin starts responding. He's like, no, no, not you. This woman over here.
Yeah, of course. Don't blame the brother.
Why are you picking scabs and trying to make things worse than what they are? And it's an interesting sort of moment because it reminds me, I have this conversation with you all the time. Introspection is not... comfortable and it's not like second nature for most of us. You know what I'm saying?
I feel like because we do this profession, we tend to do it a little bit more than the average Joe, but still it's not comfortable. I've had people tell me straight up, why would I want to bring up the past? Leave that shit where it is and keep it moving. You know what I'm saying? That's my background. You know, that's most people. You know what I'm saying?
Because it takes work to have to pick it up, look at it, examine it to make it truly dissipate.
It's the great American tragedy. I mean, it's every play about the American family that's ever been written. It's like, and today's the day. that the family deals with 30 years of things they haven't talked about.
Yeah. The trauma. I thought you meant just like America itself in terms of admitting its own past and sort of coming to terms with it.
Oh, oh, oh. Oh, Zach. 100%. 100%. Yeah. That does not necessarily free that from informing the way that we live our lives. Sure. Absolutely. Yeah.
So they delve into it and then he starts talking about mom. And what does he say about you that Randall's just like, pause, bro.
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Chapter 5: What challenges do parents face with their children's eating habits?
Objectively. Because right now, we only have our perspective, right? of how the childhood went down. Because in a therapy session said, I was there for your childhood, bro. It didn't seem that bad to me. And he says, but because of that, because I see your childhood differently, doesn't discount the way that you experienced it.
And he winds up telling him like, look, man, I wanted to be here for you today because you were there for me at my lowest point. And today I did a bad job. I was a bad brother and I'm sorry. And I really appreciated him saying it.
Same. I wrote that down. I was like, it seems insurmountable sometimes, but that is how you apologize. Like that is how you take accountability. I was like, oh, I love that that is being modeled to all of us. Cause it was a revelation. I'm sure I felt that way when I saw it initially, but whatever's going on in my life right now or wherever, I was just like, wow, that is how you do that.
You know what it is? I feel like, I think we're all capable of it. I feel like ego sort of like gets in the way. And again, I've had this thought in my head and I said this on the podcast, they should apologize first.
It's ego and resentment. And it gets in the way of amending anything. And the only thing that we can control, like we were talking about, is our perspective. You keep your side of the street clean and you don't worry about the other side of the street.
Isn't that fascinating? I mean, we all have siblings and it's just like, it made me think about that. We share this really indelible thing, this experience that no one else understands, but those who lived it. And that's the really remarkable thing about having a sibling. And to have had wildly different experiences. Totally.
And maybe it's not something that is even, you know, remarked on until you get older. That's right.
Perspective. Like, you can't really understand what it is that you've gone through until you've got, like, 60,000 square foot view.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
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Chapter 6: How does family history influence personal struggles?
Yeah. It was a beautiful episode.
It really was.
I remember shooting it. I remember shooting that therapy scene, how heavy it was, but how also the show always gave us... We all got to get such good stuff. Let me speak for myself. I was always just so... It was the perfect... One of the things I'm trying to say guys, it was the name of the show I feel was reflective in how everyone got to be reflected in the show.
Like you could have taken all the numbers on the call sheet and added them together and divided them by seven. And that's what it felt like. Like it felt like we were doing this thing together and everybody had the highest level of support because we just wanted to make the best show possible. Right? And like, when I'm watching like the new big three, I'm like, they killing it.
And we're in this therapy thing. It's like, we all get to kill it. Like everybody gets to eat.
And I was like- It was always a good day at work. Always a good day at work.
Yeah. Which makes it seem not real. Yeah, like, did that really happen? That couldn't have happened.
And a very silly side note, this was the earliest call time for me.
Where was it?
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Chapter 7: What lessons can be learned from family therapy?
I know who she should be. If they get a chance to redo it or whatnot. I think Mandy could kill some Jean Grey. Absolutely.
You know who Jean Grey is? She's an X-Man. She's an X-Man. An X-Man. An X-Woman. Yeah.
Aren't they doing another one? No, they're doing Fantastic Four. I'm sure they are. I'm sure they are. They're always doing something.
They'll redo all of them eventually. And when they are, let them know. Mandy Moore, Jean Grey.
The hashtag is Marvel Mandy.
Hashtag Marvel Mandy.
So get on the interwebs, the WWWs. Go to Instagram.com. Yes. And get on there and start.
Thank you for campaigning for me.
I got your back. because it's about time.
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