SubwayTakes
“The only way to get ahead in life these days is to show hole!” with Ian Fidance
Thu, 22 May 2025
From their studio and basement, respectively, Kareem and Ian rehash his original take, why Ian’s display name on the podcast app is Shrimp King, how the ‘90s were the pinnacle of…everything, the taxonomy of gremlins versus goblins, body dysmorphia in men, the etiquette of riding the subway as a public persona, the phenomenon of Ye’s latest track, moving to Thailand to sell carpet or wood paneling, everyone smashing their phones, life on the road, airport habits, the abolition of scrolling, how Kareem got disgusting, addictions, the ingenuity of the Autoblow (use promocode SKA at checkout), and, as always, Takes on Takes©. Host: Kareem Rahma Creators: Kareem Rahma and Andrew Kuo Editor and Audio Producer: Dale Eisinger Artwork: Andrew Lawandus Theme Music: Tyler McCauley Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Chapter 1: What is the main topic of this episode?
what the hell is up subway takes gang it's your boy karim rahma of the subway takes podcast you know me you love me to know me is to love me i'm back with my co-creator and producer andrew quo that's a-n-d-r-e-w-k-u-o you can find him on instagram at a quo project his uh newly launched instagram website as he calls it it's an instagram website because
Fun fact, he just started about three months ago. Andrew, how's it going?
What's up? What's up? What's up? I just want everyone to know I've got about 200 followers. The audience development is developing.
um every day i check it i'm like yo if i get like one new follower a day it feels like it's a good day so it's good it's i mean we all gotta start somewhere dude yeah yeah yeah we all gotta start somewhere that's right that's right you gotta start from zero i did i was shocked i was shocked
Chapter 2: How did Andrew start using Instagram?
After knowing you for about maybe five or six years, knowing that you only had LinkedIn, and then one day you woke up and decided to also have Instagram, I was pretty shocked. Although I think I know the gateway drug is you were logged into the Subway Takes Instagram account.
That's right.
You saw everything Subway Takes had to offer or that Instagram had to offer, and you decided to make your own account.
Yeah. Look, I jumped headfirst in. I did, as you may recall, I did hit up you and Hasan, front of the pod, Hasan Ali Khan, on our group thread to get feedback on what my username was going to be.
That was for your domain name. That's what you were thinking about starting a website.
I was like, is this godaddy.com or like...
That was so weird. It was websites these days. I just got done recording a pod with famous comedian Ian Fidance.
I love Ian. How's he doing? I haven't seen him in like a minute. Is he doing wonderful?
He seems great. He's pretty happy. He's a positive guy. You know, he's he's I think he said he's 15 years sober, which is pretty damn good or 10. I don't remember.
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Chapter 3: Why are the 90s considered the golden era?
Well, I mean, it was a bit of a push-pull, I'll admit.
But I did phrase it as a discussion. We did not discuss that. Okay. But we discussed Life on the Road, Delta. He's a Platinum Medallion member, which I was very jealous of. And a number of other things. It's going to be a great episode. It's a great episode.
Wait, did you not... You're not on the Platinum Medallion?
Oh, no. He's Diamond. He's Diamond. Oh. Which is insane. Shit. Yeah. But back to your earlier assessment of a 90s lover. Yeah. Here's the thing.
Okay.
Everything was more interesting in the 90s than it is today.
Okay. How do you define interesting?
I'll just use an example of like, let's just use a living room. Okay. Let's use a coffee shop.
Okay, got it. All right. Okay.
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Chapter 4: What are the etiquette rules for subway riding?
Like right now, a coffee shop looks like Blank Street Coffee and Blue Bottle. Yeah, but okay. But it's just white.
Well, to be fair, you are also picking on like the world's worst versions of a modern day coffee shop. Like those are devoid of anything.
Yeah, they're modern. Well, pick another coffee shop chain.
I don't go to coffee shop chains. I don't even know what's happening there.
My brother. Fine. Let's use McDonald's or Taco Bell or Burger King. Where do you eat? You eat at all three of those.
I eat at all of them. All of them.
These days you walk into a McDonald's and it feels like you're in a fucking MoMA store. It's like the gift shop of a museum. There's not comfortable. It's literally metal and white and other shades of gray. The seating area is uncomfortable. They don't want you to stay. You order a screen. There's no Riz. Absolutely no Riz. When we were in the 90s, dude, McDonald's had fucking Riz.
Yeah. I feel like you for sure were the guy that was in the playpen area. You remember when they had the amusement park that was attached to the McDonald's?
Can you imagine what you're saying? Do you hear what you're saying right now?
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Chapter 5: How does body dysmorphia affect men?
Yeah, there's no ball pits at the McDonald's on Sixth Avenue.
No, not even a slide. And it's not even just about the playground. Even the characters, they used to have Grimace, and now he's only available when they made that Grimace shake. Yeah. Even Ronald McDonald was more prominent, and then the Happy Meals were filled with big, nice toys. Now they're just pieces of shit.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Look, you convinced me.
You convinced me. Great, great.
The 90s are warm.
They're warm and fuzzy. Yeah, yeah. I guess how do you think we're going to look back on the 2020s? That's now? Yeah, like in 20 years, how do you think we're going to look back on the 2020s?
You know, I don't know because aging is weird. I only look back. I don't look back on the millennium. I don't look back on the 10s, really.
Wait a second. You don't look back on the millenniums? That's pre-Willingsburg not being a mall.
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Chapter 6: What are the pros and cons of modern coffee shops?
Yeah, that's... Look, it's... You know, everyone's like, oh, there's no more third places. You know, that's like a whole thing. Like, you know, the New York... All these articles about third... Yeah, yeah.
I went to a third place today.
What's your third place?
The Capital One Cafe in Herald Square.
Dude, that's... First of all, that is sick. Banks have gotten really good lounges. What's their deal? Is it like free kombucha on tap? What are they doing over there?
No, no, nothing's free. I mean, things are 50% off for Capital One holders, but everyone knows Capital One sucks. So I don't have a card. But it's a safe space. I mean, it's big. Like Starbucks is canceled because they fucking suck and their coffee tastes like shit. And then Blank Street doesn't even have seats. There's like not really a coffee shop.
And so when you go to the Herald Square Capital One Cafe, it's the size of a fucking bank.
Yeah.
And by the way, there's seats. You can hang out. Good music. And they serve third wave coffee.
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Chapter 7: How do tattoos and body image play a role in identity?
I'm definitely not wearing a collar. That's right.
It's not a time to flex.
Yeah, but I don't know. Since when do collars signify me taking it more seriously? There's plenty of guys who wear collars that still look pretty fucking sloppy, let's be honest. You've been to Miami. You know what I'm talking about.
Yeah, but generally speaking, I would say that guys that wear t-shirts are just not as tight.
Wow. Dale, do you hear that? I can't believe he would say that to two men on a podcast recording. They're both wearing t-shirts. That's actually insulting.
It's okay. We all have body dysmorphia. We talked about it in the episode.
We did talk about it in the episode. I have body dysmorphia, and honestly, it is related to t-shirts. Yeah.
I don't wear t-shirts. I have noticed about you. You only wear a collar thing, and then you just unbutton it all the way down to your navel.
Yeah, look at it right here.
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Chapter 8: What is the significance of showing 'hole' in today's society?
And why that is the thing? Because you want to return to the grave with a clean body. Oh, is that like a religious thing or that's just like a vibe thing? Yeah.
Okay, got it. You know, obviously I don't know when I'm going to die, but like if I have some time to know. Assuming I die of natural causes, I'll probably remove them when I'm like 67. So do you have any tattoos? You don't have any tattoos.
no i'm um i'm a i'm a good boy yeah uh you did you did have a phase though what's a bad boy phase i did have a bad boy phase but what do they call that what do they call the asians that are kind of hood oh that is called oh fuck what is that called look that up there's a specific it's not blazing is it no no that's when you're mixed that's tiger woods
Ghetto Asians.
It was... Name. Well, for girls, it's ABCs. Or ABGs. I can't remember. Asian baby girls. That's like the flip side of the Fast and the Furious. That's like Devin Aoki is like an ABG. But yeah, what was...
the other thing the other god oh it's definitely it's definitely on the internet it's called like uh i'm gonna go to urban dictionary.com yeah it's like the guys who have like rice rockets and shit like that and like souped up civics i'm not saying that i'm allowed to say that can i say that shit i don't know i think you can wait what the fuck there's a specific thing for that okay let's see here what do i type into urban dictionary asians
I'd be like, it's like almost like, it's like bad boy Asians from like San Gabriel Valley.
No, dude, I don't know. I don't know. This is going to bother me all day.
It is going to bother me too, actually. Let me just look it up as well.
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