My Therapist Ghosted Me
MTGM EXTRA! "I won't feel that excitement again in this lifetime."
Wed, 19 Feb 2025
This week, it's time for Vogue & Joanne to do some Googling about periods and what's ACTUALLY going on every month. Do we all actually know enough?! Plus, a listener who thought she'd made a connection online, which turned out to be something different. If you’d like to get in touch, you can send an email to [email protected] review Global's Privacy Policy: https://global.com/legal/privacy-policy/For merch, tour dates and more visit: www.mytherapistghostedme.comFor more information about Joanne's gigs, just visit www.joannemcnally.comThis episode contains explicit language and adult themes that may not be suitable for all listeners.
Chapter 1: What insights do Vogue and Joanne share about periods?
Welcome to My Therapist. Go to me. Do we need to kind of freshen up our intros?
It's that time of year, Jo, don't worry.
It's like clockwork, isn't it? Is it? I think we need to freshen up our intros. Try something different.
Just throw us something.
Go, go, do it.
Like improv. Yeah, vibe it.
All right.
No, let's stick with what we have. I think it works. Welcome to my therapist ghosted me with me. Joanne McNally and my work wife, Vogue Williams.
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Chapter 2: What do Vogue and Joanne think about the pressure of motherhood?
I thought of the perfect gift for you. Oh, thrilled. I love gifts. Well, it's also the perfect one for me to give you as well because it's not that expensive.
Is this like when Homer bought Marge a bowling ball with his name on it? Yeah, I've just bought loads of runners in my own size. Oh, they don't fit you. Oh, I'll keep them. Don't worry. I'll do something with them. That feels like this is the vibe. Hold on.
Sorry, I just fixed my... Look at Joe nail hoovering that bagel. What time is it? Is that your first meal of the day or something? Never seen someone hungrier.
Honestly, I'm sorry. I'm just hanging out on my ass.
Oh, you're hungover?
Yeah.
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Chapter 3: Why do Vogue and Joanne find humor in childbirth experiences?
oh tell us please my favourite I did my last going out on the piss before Joss has this baby this baby oh Joss is just having the baby no involvement for you no we will have a baby but ultimately she has to do the having of it yeah she's doing the heavy lifting and the heavy pushing listen guys that girl has got she has got gas and air waiting for her I'm jealous personally
It's the only reason I want to have a kid. Oh, it's fantastic. Pump that shit into me.
It is great. The baby will come out.
Joanne will... The baby will come out and Joanne will be like, no, I'm still... I still need it.
I might pop in, Jo.
Would I pop in to... Yeah, I'll text you. I'll let you know when it's all go time and you can... Will you?
Yeah, I might pop... I'd be meaning to pop in, actually, to the...
birth baby hospital for a while just trying to check it out see what's going on there I might as well have a plug on that pipe thing while I'm there Joe I'd be careful because when I was having Otto she was scratching at the door it was really got frightening towards the end I was like folk you don't even need it anymore you're a huge vagina give it to me she's already out which one is that
Why are women complaining about giving birth? They have all the resources in the world. They just... I want to hear what else. And then you get free toast after. Sorry. Why are they always banging on about it?
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Chapter 4: How do Vogue and Joanne handle breakups and emotional resilience?
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, I know. Yeah, people will only listen to people complain for a short amount of time. And then you get, you get moaned fatigue, don't you? You're like, oh, come on now.
You're actually not too much of a whinger when you're sick. On the rare occasion that you are sick, you don't whinge that much. But that's because I'm alone. Yeah, so you're whinging privately.
Yeah, I just kind of, I've learned because of my relationship status that I don't have one. I've learned to be very resilient and I know that now I have only myself to rely on because that's what happens.
You wouldn't mind having a chat with Amber, would you, for me? I can't.
She's not resilient like me. Amber's not mentally resilient like me.
I had to screen her calls over the weekend. I was like, I can't answer it. I'd take the odd one and then I was like, no, I can't, I can't. She'd ring me like four times a day and I'd accept one because I just couldn't listen anymore. I'm like,
I actually you know what I don't care and she's like we had a fight over her we had a fight over her having the flu because she was convinced it was way worse than the flu and I was like no that sounds like the flu it's not the flu and I have this and I was like no it sounds like the flu and then eventually she found out it was the flu but she's one of those people as well when she breaks up with somebody which hasn't for a long time thankfully she'll go on about it for months and months on end yeah I have a touch I do have a touch that now I just I take it hard I do I take heartbreak hard I
I crack. I do crack. But I actually have a friend going through it at the moment and it's horrible to watch. I forgot that like visceral, guttural, that constant nausea. Nausea. I actually think... Sickness, sickness, sickness in the stomach.
I think, and this is not to sound bad or take away from death, but I think like, like when I think of my dad dying, I'm like, I was really sad. But when you think of going through a really, like you're in pain when you go through a breakup, even though that goes away faster.
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Chapter 5: What misconceptions do women have about fertility?
I mean, I can't, I don't, I don't think, I can't say if I'm not completely surprising. She says diplomatically. I wouldn't say I'm shocked by that revelation.
Your go-to would be to blame yourself. My go-to would be like, yeah, they were awful.
I like the breakup's my fault. They're like, Joanne, we haven't even broken up yet. And I'm like, but we will because everything ends and it will be my fault. I don't know. We need someone, we need a middle ground for two extreme versions.
we're both to Lulu in our own ways do you know what I mean but I yeah we're to Lulu but I'm happy with the way I am and so are you like I'm happy I'm not changing I'm not changing for anyone too late no 40 now nearly I know you're nearly you're nearly in the club I know I'm excited she's nearly middle aged I can't wait I can't wait middle age has changed now I'm not middle aged because I'm not going to die at 80 I'm probably going to die at 95 so
Well, apparently a 30 is middle-aged according to some science thing I read recently. Yeah. But also, sorry, and then another thing I read, middle-aged no longer exists as in like culturally, there's no such thing. Middle-aged used to be floor-length floral dresses and you suddenly need to cut all your hair off. Not a thing anymore. Look at us.
Look at us. Look at them. My hair's nearly down to my arse. Yeah. Look at you. I went to get my, I went to get my, remember I told you I was going to do fertility, I went to get fertility checked. Yes. I don't know what, I think it's just this day and age, everyone's just worried about fertility. And I don't even know if I want to have another child. But anyway, I went to get it checked.
And like you said, so she's checking my fertility. She's like, everything was fine. And then she was like, oh, there was an egg has been released from the right ovary. And I was like, well done. And then she goes, oh, an egg has been released from the left ovary. And I said, oh.
I said, my friend, Joanne told me that when you get older, your body starts shooting out eggs, shooting, shooting, shooting. Well, Joanne, she told me that it doesn't just happen to older people. It actually can happen to younger women as well, where you just go pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop.
That's why people don't believe my facts.
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Chapter 6: What is the connection between eggs and periods?
Oh, so were you double dropping eggs? Is that what you're saying? I double dropped an egg this month. Just, where do they get, like I said, where do they, to where?
What do you mean? I've doubled, it releases an egg and it's going to come out in your period and then it released another egg at the same time. So now Spencer's wearing five condoms. Just in case.
Hold on a second.
Is a period an egg?
Yeah.
Jo, don't pretend. Jo, no, no, no, no, no, Jo. This is not the time for you to pipe up and pretend that you knew that. I realise this is not a good time for men's cleaning. It's the wall of the womb.
It's the wall. We're shedding the wall. Yeah, but you're also getting rid of the egg that month. Well, they could have.
Is this not something I should know about myself?
Do you know what? Do you see when she said that? And I knew it was the egg. But when she was like, is it the egg? I was like, well, actually, no. Now that Joanne says it might not be. Yes, it is. Why don't they teach us that in school? What do they teach you in school?
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