Joanne reckons it's time for a new item on MTGM... Welcome to "The Culture Pocket". Who knows whether it'll last, but it's something to do. Plus, a couple of fantastic emails about a dating fail (classic) and someone who seems to be turning her BF into her Dad...If you’d like to get in touch, you can send an email to [email protected] review Global's Privacy Policy: https://global.com/legal/privacy-policy/For merch, tour dates and more visit: www.mytherapistghostedme.comFor more information about Joanne's gigs, just visit www.joannemcnally.comThis episode contains explicit language and adult themes that may not be suitable for all listeners.
Chapter 1: What funny memory do Vogue and Joanne share?
We're just taking a sweet walk down memory lane, aren't we? I'd rather it was you, Joanne. I know, I know. There's something, there's a brother, sister, sibling situation that just never needs to enter the bedroom. My poor brother, I don't know how he holds his head high in the office with all the talk, all my riding talk that I do, even at the show and all.
I sound like I'm riding rings around myself. Not, really not. Oh my God. You're actually not that busy, no. Did I tell you I went in for bloods? Because I've been scrolling so much TikTok that I was like, I'm perimenopausal. I'm perimenopausal. I'm perimenopausal.
You told me privately, but you haven't told the listeners.
I'm perimenopausal. I'm perimenopausal. I was engaged with a man.
Okay.
He gave her a ring and everything.
I was in a tryst. I was in a tryst. And the sex wasn't good. It wasn't good. It wasn't good. It wasn't good. Folk, why are you pretending to be surprised? You're such a pro. You know every inch of this story.
No, in my mind it was, I thought you enjoyed it.
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Chapter 2: What are the signs of perimenopause?
Hold on a second now. With the last lad? Are you out of your mind? Oh no, not that one. No, I'm talking about this guy. I'm talking about that lad. Yeah. Not the other one. Anyway, we're going to need an Excel doc to keep up with these. I'm not riding rings by myself. Are you sure?
No, not that one.
Not that one, the other one. And she's like, oh yeah, she knows it straight away I'm talking about. And anyway, I got it into my head that it was all my fault and went in to get bloods. And I was like, I'm paying menopause. And the doctor was like, Joanne, you're not actually. She's like, do you think maybe you just don't fancy your... The minor steep and wits. And I was like, oh, I...
That literally had not occurred to me because the female angle on it is, well, I'm with someone, so I'm just kind of, yeah, yeah, yeah, it's me. It's my fault. It's my hormones. I'm obviously falling barren. But yeah, I'm Grant. Just didn't fancy your man. Gas, isn't it? It is gas.
You do kind of tend to be like, oh, well, maybe, why am I not into it? What's wrong with me?
Yeah.
Maybe I'm not into it because it's crap. I think even in marriage, like Sven and I, we have great sex, but sometimes we don't. Yeah. Sometimes it's just like, and I'll literally be like, what was that?
Well, but at least if you have, if it's good, you know, if it's more good than bad, fine. Oh God, yeah. But this was just all bad. I don't know why the two of us stuck it out. I'll never know. I don't think he knows either. It was very strange. It was like we were trying to fit a square peg into a round hole because other things really worked very well, but that just didn't work.
Honestly, I didn't fucking trust him. That's the bottom line. And if my body doesn't trust you, my body's not going to, it's not going to lean into you. It's not going to give, you know, it's not going to do what it needs to do or it's not going to do what it wants to do. If it doesn't, if it's like, nee, nee, nee, nee, that's, and that's ultimately what happens.
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Chapter 3: How should you approach trust in relationships?
I'm going to get in ahead of us. I'm going to nip that in the bud. I'll keep an eye out too. It's coming for us. Yeah, anything I do now, I'll be like, have you had your hormones checked? It's time for the HRT.
I'm going to open my bedroom door now and the peri is just going to be waiting on the other side.
I'll be like, Joe will be like our gaslighting husband. He'll be like, girls, I think it might be time for the HRT.
I heard it affects sleep as well. I'm not bringing up sleep, but that would be one of my very, very large concerns around it.
anxious I can deal with it sleep I can't I can't yeah it's all ahead of us it's all ahead of us Jo not you not you Jo not you I'm sorry I'm sorry it's not me well do you know what actually do you know what you're doing very well with because men it's hair hair loss I think is the big issue for men that's something I do kind of feel a little sorry for lads I know I feel very lucky in that you have a full head you have a great head of hair Jo
You've like three sets of men's heads, really, in the one head, which is particularly lucky and greedy. Joanne, we never spoke about, I mean, you and I were like, this is a great thing to bring to the pod. And we were really excited about it. And then we never did it. What was your name for it? What was your name for it? We had a name for it. The Culture Pocket.
No, Culture Pocket. The Culture Pocket. Yeah, Culture Pocket. Yeah, I was like, let's start a Culture Pocket where we recommend what we're just kind of like, you know, what we're listening to. And well, that's it. Reading, listening to with our eyes and our ears.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. The Culture Pocket. Now, it's mainly going to be in the main episode, but considering we forgot it because we went on a tangent of Eho Watness, so we want to talk about the Culture Pocket now. Sure, yeah. Hit us. So... Vogue, what's in your pocket? In my pocket...
I have no TV currently I haven't even started watching The White Lotus because I'm judging the book awards in London and I have to read six books in a month so I've started doing what you're doing which is one of the best things in the world by the way listening to a book in your ears I love it I know yeah fly through them and then you can kind of listen with your ears when you're out and about and then if you want to kind of a more immersive experience in the evening you can kind of check back into the book and yeah it does speed the whole process up
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Chapter 4: What is the Culture Pocket segment about?
And then everyone at the show, like you pull out what's in your pocket and then he raps it.
oh I love that it's so good so every time I hear what's in your pocket I think of a band of mine just in case he tries to sue me for plagiarism Rob I do I am aware it's kind of your thing but you can't own pockets Rob okay you can't own pockets I feel like he might be able to own pockets by the sounds of it now I haven't seen him personally but yeah okay fine yeah Rob you can't own pockets it's not right to ask you gotta share pockets will we do some listener emails we will indeed music
Hi, Vogue and Joanne. Longtime listener, Salpidine's sister. Oh, love. And a little poet who does not know it. I might have resolved this by the time you ever read this, but I just want to check if I'm being unreasonable or perfectly sane.
I'm an attractive, successful woman in my early 40s, and I've been dating the cesspool of men for a long time, but I have not had to divorce or bear children for any of them whatsoever. And I count this as a blessing. I like this woman already.
I found that a trigger I have recently is getting to third, fourth day territory and allowing the lads back to mind for stimulating conversation and a life fondle. I find myself seeing rage clouds when they come in presented with large swathes of swaths. Swaths? Swaths or swathes?
I like swathes.
of my personality on display in the form of art, photos, books all over the place and do any of them notice anything and ask a question to get to know me better no now I must caveat that I have gotten better at choosing the less narcissistic sociopathic types and the last few have been your classic nice lad but my god they're dull Jesus Christ I could have written this myself my god
41.
In her mid 40s. Early 40s.
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Chapter 5: What book recommendations do Vogue and Joanne have?
Should I just chill the fuck out and give them more time than four weeks? As a current example, and one that's prompted me to email, I told current nice lad, 44-year-old divorced dad, that he needs to plan date five because I love a man with a plan and I plan everyone's lives for a living and I'm tired. I'm the planner. I plan everything.
Anyway, his suggestion was I go to watch him build his fucking Star Wars Lego.
Oh, here. Just bang an incel off that now.
The thing about it is, he's not even inviting her to do it with him, just to watch him do it. He has this for his 13-year-old son, but even when I said I wouldn't help but would drink wine and point out everything he's doing wrong, I don't think he understood my absolute sarcasm. Now I have to tell him point blank that watching live Lego Masters is absolutely not what gets a woman seduced.
I'm so exhausted. Am I being unreasonable?
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Chapter 6: How do listener emails contribute to the episode?
I would find that very unusual now if somebody asked me to go and watch them play Lego.
Couple of things. I think this woman, she reminds me of myself. She's at, she has probably got her own space. She is what I call problematically independent. She's not malleable. She's not willing to bend. She's not, she doesn't need someone to make her complete, which makes meeting someone unusual. much harder because you don't really need them.
Because relationships, a lot of it, it's about swapping resources and stuff. So you're like, I don't really need them. And I'll tell you this, he does notice the art in your house. He does. Because I've had that with lads who come in and they'll say nothing about it. And actually, sometimes, and then the ones who come in and go, oh, I love this and that and that.
but sometimes there was one guy who came in and he was actually playing me a little bit by not acknowledging anything in the flat it was all very strange but then asked if he could move in when I was in the States he didn't he didn't acknowledge that giant lamp the giant one that wasn't here when that particular gentleman was calling what I mean is I think men it's a mess when you get to your 40s and you're self-sufficient dating gets gnarly it gets tricky it's not like it was
You're just super duper picky now. And you need someone to match your level. You're bringing nothing to the table. Unless you're bringing something I don't have to the table, you're bringing nothing to the table. And also, I don't eat at the table. And the problem is, when you're in your 40s, you start bringing a lot of shit to the table because you have 40 years behind you.
I know, but Joanne, I mean, come on, for anyone, it doesn't even matter, regardless if I'm 28 and someone asks me to go play Lego with them, I'm going to say, dude, like, come on. Like, go play Lego with your friends. He's going to invite you to the Warhammer shop next. You've got to be careful. Do you want to play some Sega Mega Drive? No, I actually don't. Not today. Thanks a million.
I think this might be... I got you a Nintendo Switch for your birthday.
I know. I just think there's... I think that maybe the Lego is the straw that's broken the camel's back. There's more going on here. She's bored of these lads. They're not stimulating her. And now she's like, Lego. He probably sees...
her apartment thinks she's quite artistic she enjoys art she's like oh what can I do to bring something like new to this woman's life or something interesting you know the way lads God love them they're always trying to kind of think outside the box with stuff we're like I just want to get pissed at dinner get back in your box I don't want to build the box I don't want to build it
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