2 Bears, 1 Cave with Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer
Ripping Beers & Running 5K's w/ Jason Kelce, N.O.R.E, and Beau Allen | 2 Bears, 1 Cave
Mon, 12 May 2025
SPONSORS: - Head to https://bubblycleaning.com/Bears to get your first 3 hours of cleaning for only $19. Thanks so much to Bubbly Cleaning for sponsoring this episode! - Head to https://acorns.com/bears or download the Acorns app to get started. - Start your free online visit today at https://Hims.com/BEARS. - Upgrade your wallet today! Get 10% Off @Ridge with code CAVE at https://www.Ridge.com/CAVE #Ridgepod - Order a bottle of Por Osos and some killer merch online https://drinkporosos.com This week on 2 Bears 1 Cave, Tom Segura and Bert Kershire are LIVE from the 2 Bears 5k in Tampa Bay Florida! They aren't alone either, the bears are joined by not one, not two, but three guest bears! Joining Tom and Bert are rapper/running enthusiast N.O.R.E, as well as, former NFL players/Super Bowl champs, Jason Kelce and Beau Allen. The group all get together to talk about the real challenges of the 2 Bears 5k, who the best drinkers are, running, nicknames, dictators, Hype Williams, stupid purchases, and so much more. Enjoy the show! 2 Bears, 1 Cave Ep. 288 https://tomsegura.com/tour https://www.bertbertbert.com/tour https://store.ymhstudios.com Chapters 00:00:00 - Intro 00:04:17 - N.O.R.E 00:14:48 - Japanese Whiskey 00:20:12 - Beau Allen & Jason Kelce 00:26:33 - The Best Drinkers & Worst NFL Matchups 00:35:33 - Nicknames & Dictators 00:42:02 - Hype Williams 00:45:39 - NFL Rookies 00:53:51 - Drinking Before A Big Game 00:58:23 - Stupid Purchases 01:06:16 - Wrap Up Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Chapter 1: Who are the hosts and special guests on this episode of 2 Bears 1 Cave?
Welcome to another episode of Two Bears, One Cave. I'm Tom and this is Bert, everybody. Say hello.
What? I'm hammered.
Yeah, that is not weird. This is incredible. Thank you guys so much for coming out. If you're listening, we are at Raymond James Stadium in Tampa, Florida. And there's a 5K, which was, I think it was your goddamn idea.
This idea is almost dumber than Two Bears Sports Management.
Yeah, that really didn't pan out.
Two Bears Racing, Two Bears AI Porn. Yeah. We've had a lot of dumb ideas, Tom.
Quite a few. And I put this near the top, but it fucking panned out.
We were so hungover this morning. I was like, there's no way I'm running this fucking race.
I was tapping out. I smoked DMT yesterday, and I had like 20 shots at Bar Howard, was it? Bar Howard. Yes.
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Chapter 2: What inspired the 2 Bears 5K and how did it come together?
And then we did it in Los Angeles, and now we're here in Raymond James, and we've got over 7,500 people here. And it's just amazing. And I've got to keep it going for all the bucks that showed up. The bucks came out. But let's break down that, do not take my fucking blood pressure. Just give me a goddamn IV. I do not want that, or just give me the IV.
Or don't, or don't, but do not take my blood pressure. How bad would your blood pressure be? I do not take my blood pressure. Is that a good sign? No, I get the white coat syndrome, and I don't want to, listen, I normally get two bags. I'll be fine with one bag. Just do not take my blood pressure. What's his blood pressure right now? It's still thinking? Well, does it register he's dead inside?
What are you talking about? You're so frustrating. Your blood pressure is always perfect. Well, it might not be.
I don't know. 140 over 70?
Yeah. It's not great. It's not terrible, she just said. I personally would rather lower on the top number. If you're going to take my blood pressure, I don't need an IV. Stop. No, I'm not getting one. Why? There's 7,000 people here. I'm not getting my blood pressure taken. And guess what? All 7,000 want you to get your blood pressure. Nope, nope, nope. Stop. Game's over. I'm not playing. Stop.
Game's over. Nope. It's my arm, and I hold him tight. Nori, get up here. Nori, come here. Nori's a black man. You don't go to the doctor. No way. Nori, come here, please. Over here. Sit right here on the stairs.
Nori, will you let them take your blood pressure? That's all I got.
There you go. That's my man. Here, we got a mic for you, Nori. And Jason Kelsey's Garage Beers are up here. Have you had one yet? Here, sit down. I never met Tom, but I feel like I know you.
What's up, bro? How you doing, man? It's a pleasure to meet you.
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Chapter 3: How do the hosts and guests approach running and training for races?
Vita Veya.
Vita here.
I didn't see Vita. I don't think Vita's running many 5Ks. Vita was a real problem.
I wanted Des Watson.
That's that big boy, right?
He's a big guy. You see Debs Watson?
He's 460 pounds, right? 460 pounds, 7'2".
Big boy. Yeah. Yeah. I wanted him to run it, but he doesn't have to report for another week. Wait, how do you guys come up? This is good. I like the nicknames thing. Did you guys have a lot of nicknames in the.
We did. And the old school players had all had nicknames. Yeah. That's one thing I wish we'd bring back. I'm trying. To the NFL is like the great nicknames of like the past. Yeah. Let's get nicknames going.
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Chapter 7: What are the hosts' views on nicknames, dictators, and other off-topic fun?
Welcome to another episode of Two Bears, One Cave. I'm Tom and this is Bert, everybody. Say hello.
What? I'm hammered.
Yeah, that is not weird. This is incredible. Thank you guys so much for coming out. If you're listening, we are at Raymond James Stadium in Tampa, Florida. And there's a 5K, which was, I think it was your goddamn idea.
This idea is almost dumber than Two Bears Sports Management.
Yeah, that really didn't pan out.
Two Bears Racing, Two Bears AI Porn. Yeah. We've had a lot of dumb ideas, Tom.
Quite a few. And I put this near the top, but it fucking panned out.
We were so hungover this morning. I was like, there's no way I'm running this fucking race.
I was tapping out. I smoked DMT yesterday, and I had like 20 shots at Bar Howard, was it? Bar Howard. Yes.
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