Kathy
Appearances
The Ramsey Show
Delayed Gratification Is a Key Ingredient to Building Wealth
Hi, Dave. Thank you. Thanks so much for taking my call. I feel like I could use a group call with all of you all, Rachel, Dave, John, Ken, and Dave. But, Dave, you're like my financial father. I think we're the same age, but I've been listening to you for a long time. So I waited till a day that you were here. So I think I have two main questions. Can we afford to own two homes?
The Ramsey Show
Delayed Gratification Is a Key Ingredient to Building Wealth
And the second was, if we divorce, what considerations are there for our investment account? So just a tiny bit of background. We're living separately at home. I'm 65. My husband's 67. I travel two to three weeks out of every month to go and help our daughter who lives in a different state with her tiny little ones with another one on the way.
The Ramsey Show
Delayed Gratification Is a Key Ingredient to Building Wealth
I've gotten involved in a church up there and starting to develop some friendships up there. My daughter and son-in-law, they want me to come as much as I want and to be there with them, but they don't really want to spend time with my husband.
The Ramsey Show
Delayed Gratification Is a Key Ingredient to Building Wealth
behavioral and emotional immaturity, I think I would say. Is that her dad? It doesn't seem to.
The Ramsey Show
Delayed Gratification Is a Key Ingredient to Building Wealth
Oh, is that her father? I'm sorry, yes.
The Ramsey Show
Delayed Gratification Is a Key Ingredient to Building Wealth
She wants it no more than a couple days at a time. She's concerned about him being around the young kids.
The Ramsey Show
Delayed Gratification Is a Key Ingredient to Building Wealth
Well, I have involved our church and they're tempted to talk to him, but I'd say it's emotional immaturity, spiritual immaturity, relational immaturity, focus on politics and things that just don't matter. Um, and he has asked for forgiveness every time these things happen. What are these things?
The Ramsey Show
Delayed Gratification Is a Key Ingredient to Building Wealth
Um, trying to think of a real quick example. Um, uh, he doesn't know when to quit. When people say, I don't want to talk about that. He, he won't quit. Um, And I've talked to my pastor about it and he's tried to set up times to talk with him, but he'll, he just says that he will go to counseling, but then it never happened. So we've been living separately in our own home here for about six months.
The Ramsey Show
Delayed Gratification Is a Key Ingredient to Building Wealth
We've been married for 41 years and maybe I'm not explaining it correctly.
The Ramsey Show
Delayed Gratification Is a Key Ingredient to Building Wealth
Okay, well, and I've put boundaries around things, and I may have, I think maybe I jumped ahead. This has just been getting progressively worse.
The Ramsey Show
Delayed Gratification Is a Key Ingredient to Building Wealth
Well, and I hate to correct you there, I really do, but that is not how it's panned out. That's what you told me. Well, yeah, I'm trying to be careful here. Um, because this has been ongoing for years and years and my going there so much has just recently started to pick up because of the need there. I am not running away from my home here and my responsibilities here. And I'm confident of that.
The Ramsey Show
Delayed Gratification Is a Key Ingredient to Building Wealth
And my pastor's confident. Okay. All right.
The Ramsey Show
Delayed Gratification Is a Key Ingredient to Building Wealth
Yes. So I'm, you know, deciding our home here is paid off.
The Ramsey Show
Delayed Gratification Is a Key Ingredient to Building Wealth
Yes, and I have, and I contacted, I have my investment account, the $1.3 million left.
The Ramsey Show
Delayed Gratification Is a Key Ingredient to Building Wealth
one of the brands and i went to another one of the brands to have because i'm right now 90 10 in stocks and then uh bonds and you don't need to move anything until you decide if it's what's going to be split exactly exactly so right now you need to decide first thing we got to do just add it all up and start talking to a diverse attorney and how much of that's going to be yours how much of it's going to be his because in most states it's down the middle
The Ramsey Show
Delayed Gratification Is a Key Ingredient to Building Wealth
Right. It's 50-50 here. And he says, my husband says he understands that, I mean, I've managed all that. I've built it. We've done it together. But he said, you know, you deserve more than that. But I said, well, beyond that, we just need to figure out what we're going to do. And they worked out this plan for me with a 50-50 split. But...
The Ramsey Show
Delayed Gratification Is a Key Ingredient to Building Wealth
with it changing from 90-10 stocks and bonds to 70-30 stocks and bonds. So I had a question for you about that. I was thinking about going with a second company, but they do individual stocks. And I know that that is... Generally, you do not do that.