Menu
Sign In Pricing Add Podcast

Bryan Callen

Appearances

PBD Podcast

DOGE Dividend Checks, Trump vs. Zelenskyy, Bolsonaro Charged w/ Bryan Callen | PBD Podcast | Ep. 549

1089.574

Can I just tell you how much that is? Hold on. Let me tell you. $37 trillion. Yeah, go. Count. One, two. It's insane. I'm going to give you... Keep talking because I want to give you perspective on what $37 trillion is.

PBD Podcast

DOGE Dividend Checks, Trump vs. Zelenskyy, Bolsonaro Charged w/ Bryan Callen | PBD Podcast | Ep. 549

1292.138

My guess is sometimes you resign because, one, you figure you're already going to be fired, or there's no way you can do your work under this administration because you've already been painted as a bad guy. This happens all the time. You just see the writing on the wall. So sometimes people would rather resign than get fired. I think that's probably something of what's going on.

PBD Podcast

DOGE Dividend Checks, Trump vs. Zelenskyy, Bolsonaro Charged w/ Bryan Callen | PBD Podcast | Ep. 549

1313.056

The other thing that I worry about, and we have to hold our side accountable. This is very important. We need to know that it's one thing to go in and move fast and break things. I'm all about it, man, and I'm all about shrinking government. Government has no accountability, and it's too big. It's a leviathan. We know this.

PBD Podcast

DOGE Dividend Checks, Trump vs. Zelenskyy, Bolsonaro Charged w/ Bryan Callen | PBD Podcast | Ep. 549

1330.229

Let's just make sure, I think, that we understand how these complicated systems work. Let's not throw the baby out with the bathwater. Social Security, by the way, politically is a hand grenade, especially for Trump. There are a lot of voters that rely on those. In this state, are you kidding me? Social Security is a very delicate issue. So we have to be very careful about how we handle this.

PBD Podcast

DOGE Dividend Checks, Trump vs. Zelenskyy, Bolsonaro Charged w/ Bryan Callen | PBD Podcast | Ep. 549

1355.374

And it is a complicated thing. You can get into specifically, why does Patrick Bette David get Social Security? He doesn't need it. Why is that? What's going on there? So there are things you can do with Social Security. Is there a play to at least privatize some of it? It is the People's Bank. You don't get that money if you die early sometimes.

PBD Podcast

DOGE Dividend Checks, Trump vs. Zelenskyy, Bolsonaro Charged w/ Bryan Callen | PBD Podcast | Ep. 549

1377.909

There are a lot of issues there that we can talk about. The Cato Institute... talked about, and there's some thoughtful scholarship on Social Security. I just worry about we live in a world today, and you would appreciate this. You're a numbers guy. You're overthinking. Am I?

PBD Podcast

DOGE Dividend Checks, Trump vs. Zelenskyy, Bolsonaro Charged w/ Bryan Callen | PBD Podcast | Ep. 549

1554.67

Is there any gold there? Yeah, what if there isn't? Why are you going to investigate? Okay, so let me ask you this now.

PBD Podcast

DOGE Dividend Checks, Trump vs. Zelenskyy, Bolsonaro Charged w/ Bryan Callen | PBD Podcast | Ep. 549

1572.075

That's it, bro. That's all it is. You know what we're dealing with? What? We are looking at, in my opinion, a revolution, the likes of which we haven't seen maybe since, I don't know, Andrew Jackson. I don't know if we've ever seen this. Listen, people forget this. 1977, Jimmy Carter tried to audit the government. He tried to shrink government. He had a worker freeze.

PBD Podcast

DOGE Dividend Checks, Trump vs. Zelenskyy, Bolsonaro Charged w/ Bryan Callen | PBD Podcast | Ep. 549

1592.519

He said we are not going to hire any more federal workers. 1993, Al Gore tried to initiate an early retirement for federal workers. So the Democrats have tried to do this before. It's not just a Republican thing. And anybody who has a problem with cutting down on waste and auditing these departments, I mean, I don't understand the argument there. Let's see where the waste is. How could that be bad?

PBD Podcast

DOGE Dividend Checks, Trump vs. Zelenskyy, Bolsonaro Charged w/ Bryan Callen | PBD Podcast | Ep. 549

1661.664

Because, by the way, and not to make it a political issue, but it is true that about 90% of federal workers do vote Democrat. There is that. I'm not saying that that's, you know, but we have to.

PBD Podcast

DOGE Dividend Checks, Trump vs. Zelenskyy, Bolsonaro Charged w/ Bryan Callen | PBD Podcast | Ep. 549

1684.937

But, guys, what you're also hearing is this. Federal workers are no longer guaranteed lifetime employment. Well, who is? None of us are. Bro, I'm not guaranteed. I got my show this weekend in Miami. If I don't put butts in the seat, I'm in trouble. That's up to me, bro.

PBD Podcast

DOGE Dividend Checks, Trump vs. Zelenskyy, Bolsonaro Charged w/ Bryan Callen | PBD Podcast | Ep. 549

1948.157

Pat, what are we going to do about the deficit? Will you tell me? You're a business guy.

PBD Podcast

DOGE Dividend Checks, Trump vs. Zelenskyy, Bolsonaro Charged w/ Bryan Callen | PBD Podcast | Ep. 549

1959.103

Because I'm going to come to you first. Because I'm thinking about this. Because we should pay it off.

PBD Podcast

DOGE Dividend Checks, Trump vs. Zelenskyy, Bolsonaro Charged w/ Bryan Callen | PBD Podcast | Ep. 549

2190.618

Right. But now let me ask you this. There seems to be a divide philosophically. One side says the only way to get rid of the deficit is to tax. But free market people say, hold on, bro. Tax. Give me the money so I can stimulate the economy. Right? That's right. And then you'll have a wider tax base, and then we can pay it off. I think.

PBD Podcast

DOGE Dividend Checks, Trump vs. Zelenskyy, Bolsonaro Charged w/ Bryan Callen | PBD Podcast | Ep. 549

2251.626

Do you realize what that means? That's exactly right, man. My father always said the best way to lose a friend is to lend him money.

PBD Podcast

DOGE Dividend Checks, Trump vs. Zelenskyy, Bolsonaro Charged w/ Bryan Callen | PBD Podcast | Ep. 549

2680.772

So Gavin wanted Rogan. I call Rogan. And I go, hey, do you want to do this movie? He goes, honestly, bro, I'm so busy. If it's not a ton of cash, I'm not doing it. So Gavin goes, why don't you play it? So I said to Joe, I said, you got any advice on how to play this role? He said, take yourself completely out of it. And that's all I did. Just if you're an announcer, never talk about yourself.

PBD Podcast

DOGE Dividend Checks, Trump vs. Zelenskyy, Bolsonaro Charged w/ Bryan Callen | PBD Podcast | Ep. 549

2827.57

He's done. You know what the problem with that is? That's cute. But when you get into politics, people come to you and your fundraisers say, you better vote along these lines because the money is with us. And you're either a Republican or a Democrat. And you try to be an independent. That's cute. But the real operatives look at you like a street fighter. They just go... All right, bro. We'll see.

PBD Podcast

DOGE Dividend Checks, Trump vs. Zelenskyy, Bolsonaro Charged w/ Bryan Callen | PBD Podcast | Ep. 549

2851.076

When you come to your senses, we'll be over here because the money's over here.

PBD Podcast

DOGE Dividend Checks, Trump vs. Zelenskyy, Bolsonaro Charged w/ Bryan Callen | PBD Podcast | Ep. 549

292.339

Yeah, but just because you unfollowed doesn't mean the baby goes away.

PBD Podcast

DOGE Dividend Checks, Trump vs. Zelenskyy, Bolsonaro Charged w/ Bryan Callen | PBD Podcast | Ep. 549

2984.627

Unless the economists kick ass. We don't know what they're running on.

PBD Podcast

DOGE Dividend Checks, Trump vs. Zelenskyy, Bolsonaro Charged w/ Bryan Callen | PBD Podcast | Ep. 549

3169.813

How do we avoid your guy? You and Tom know policy. How do you avoid, though, when you say you're a Democrat? You know you get these super PACs. You get the trans activists. You get the abortion activists, whoever it is. They come to you and they say, if you want our money and you need our money, you're going to vote. Absolutely along these lines.

PBD Podcast

DOGE Dividend Checks, Trump vs. Zelenskyy, Bolsonaro Charged w/ Bryan Callen | PBD Podcast | Ep. 549

3190.079

That's why you get someone like Kamala Harris saying, I supported transgender prisoners having the money to transition even immigrants. Illegal immigrant transgender prisoners.

PBD Podcast

DOGE Dividend Checks, Trump vs. Zelenskyy, Bolsonaro Charged w/ Bryan Callen | PBD Podcast | Ep. 549

3202.747

You think she believes that? It doesn't matter. That's not the point, man. You better say across lines. If you have any nuance, you're not getting our money. So how do we avoid all those special interests with all that money? I want to know, what do we do about campaign finance reform in that sense? That might be the thing to talk about. It's not sexy.

PBD Podcast

DOGE Dividend Checks, Trump vs. Zelenskyy, Bolsonaro Charged w/ Bryan Callen | PBD Podcast | Ep. 549

3220.599

The minute I say campaign finance reform, half your audience just now just went to sleep. I took all the energy out of their body. Because when you get into the nitty gritty of this stuff, but that might be really what we should talk about.

PBD Podcast

DOGE Dividend Checks, Trump vs. Zelenskyy, Bolsonaro Charged w/ Bryan Callen | PBD Podcast | Ep. 549

3731.061

That's Brazil for you. Chaos. Chaos. And everybody's got their hand out, living off the public troughs. They're not going to shrink it voluntarily. This is a really important point. Yes, as they do this doge, as they move fast, they're going to break things. Yes, they may not understand nuances of government. Yes, you throw the baby out with the bathwater.

PBD Podcast

DOGE Dividend Checks, Trump vs. Zelenskyy, Bolsonaro Charged w/ Bryan Callen | PBD Podcast | Ep. 549

3751.277

At the end of the day, you want a country... What did George Washington say? Government should be treated like a necessary evil. The larger it grows, the more coercive it becomes. It raises taxes and it passes laws. Those are coercive measures. So just know, and there's no accountability.

PBD Podcast

DOGE Dividend Checks, Trump vs. Zelenskyy, Bolsonaro Charged w/ Bryan Callen | PBD Podcast | Ep. 549

3772.495

So at the end of the day, do you need... Look, every one of these agencies we talk about, let me give you an example. Every one of these agencies has an inspector general. They have somebody that's supposed to audit, that's supposed to look for fraud, and they do, but it's not good enough. What's going on? Biden's own accounting office, what did they find? 70 different government programs.

PBD Podcast

DOGE Dividend Checks, Trump vs. Zelenskyy, Bolsonaro Charged w/ Bryan Callen | PBD Podcast | Ep. 549

3793.766

Of those 70, they found, that's his department, they found $236 billion. Irregular or overpayments or fraud. Okay, $236 billion. That is, I believe, one-fourth of the defense's budget. Okay? So there is – and that's just Biden. So we're going to find that this is – that's chicken feet compared to what they're going to find out.

PBD Podcast

DOGE Dividend Checks, Trump vs. Zelenskyy, Bolsonaro Charged w/ Bryan Callen | PBD Podcast | Ep. 549

4100.093

I love it. That's exactly what it means. You don't need Viagra. You're always hard. Brazilian for Cialis.

PBD Podcast

DOGE Dividend Checks, Trump vs. Zelenskyy, Bolsonaro Charged w/ Bryan Callen | PBD Podcast | Ep. 549

4158.836

You can't fuck me. Now, let me ask you this. Did you feel from him, did he feel nervous and worried about?

PBD Podcast

DOGE Dividend Checks, Trump vs. Zelenskyy, Bolsonaro Charged w/ Bryan Callen | PBD Podcast | Ep. 549

4295.318

I think you will be. I'd love to see. I'm coming with you. We'll go together, bro. Bro, listen to me right now. I'm telling you right now, I'm ending every one of my shows, tears. Okay? You know what my next special is called? unfuckable. What is it? Unflappable? Undiable. None of them are words. He made up his own words and then tears.

PBD Podcast

DOGE Dividend Checks, Trump vs. Zelenskyy, Bolsonaro Charged w/ Bryan Callen | PBD Podcast | Ep. 549

4324.343

That is incredible. That must have been like... If you're going to cry over something, that's what you cry over.

PBD Podcast

DOGE Dividend Checks, Trump vs. Zelenskyy, Bolsonaro Charged w/ Bryan Callen | PBD Podcast | Ep. 549

4562.973

But actually, the hidden thing that people don't talk about is when you give this aid to Ukraine, American companies are actually making those goods and services. So a lot of this supports the American economy. So I'm not even talking about that. Did you ever think, let me ask you a question. We talk about sending aid. So we send material. We send supplies.

PBD Podcast

DOGE Dividend Checks, Trump vs. Zelenskyy, Bolsonaro Charged w/ Bryan Callen | PBD Podcast | Ep. 549

4586.291

Did you ever think about what happens when that aid gets to the airport and is unloaded? Do you know? Do you guys know? Are stuff there? Think about it. So we send a bunch of stuff, radios, guns, ammunition, whatever it is, MREs. Where does it go? What happens? Do you know? Because I'm going to tell you. So nobody ever asked. Nobody asked the question. We send it.

PBD Podcast

DOGE Dividend Checks, Trump vs. Zelenskyy, Bolsonaro Charged w/ Bryan Callen | PBD Podcast | Ep. 549

4609.878

When it lands at the airport, there are trucks waiting to get that stuff, to take it to the front lines. That's not where it goes. Those trucks, all those supplies are already divvied out by who? By the people that run different quadrants of Ukraine, gangsters. And guess where that goes? It goes into their warehouses. So all that aid goes into warehouses first.

PBD Podcast

DOGE Dividend Checks, Trump vs. Zelenskyy, Bolsonaro Charged w/ Bryan Callen | PBD Podcast | Ep. 549

4638.642

And they've already met in a church and talked about who gets what. And that goes into a warehouse. And then the front lines get to buy it. And guess what groups get the aid first? The ones that prove their loyalty to Zelenskyy. More than the next guy. Do you understand? You know who told me that? CIA guys told me that. That's what happens. Nobody ever asks, where does that aid go?

PBD Podcast

DOGE Dividend Checks, Trump vs. Zelenskyy, Bolsonaro Charged w/ Bryan Callen | PBD Podcast | Ep. 549

4668.342

When it goes there, there's a whole system. It's not going to the front lines. And oh, by the way, if you did a percentage on what actually gets to the front lines, the people that really need it, it would make you cry. It's probably 10%.

PBD Podcast

DOGE Dividend Checks, Trump vs. Zelenskyy, Bolsonaro Charged w/ Bryan Callen | PBD Podcast | Ep. 549

4822.726

Can we at least say, though, guys, that let's not forget that Russia did invade and did it with their military. Let's not be apologists to Putin either. No, but here's the question.

PBD Podcast

DOGE Dividend Checks, Trump vs. Zelenskyy, Bolsonaro Charged w/ Bryan Callen | PBD Podcast | Ep. 549

4862.833

You're a Putin puppet. You're a Putin puppet. I can hear the accent. I told you. I can smell vodka on his breath, clearly. Be honest.

PBD Podcast

DOGE Dividend Checks, Trump vs. Zelenskyy, Bolsonaro Charged w/ Bryan Callen | PBD Podcast | Ep. 549

4892.883

Incredible thing ever. Look, the argument would be, look, what they did in Chechnya, what they did to Georgia, what they've always done, the Russian bear is not somebody to apologize for. Look at Afghanistan, et cetera.

PBD Podcast

DOGE Dividend Checks, Trump vs. Zelenskyy, Bolsonaro Charged w/ Bryan Callen | PBD Podcast | Ep. 549

4910.675

We probably could have... really made them pay a price if we had armed the Ukrainians right away in the beginning of this war. That would be the argument. I don't know. Tom, your thoughts on this.

PBD Podcast

DOGE Dividend Checks, Trump vs. Zelenskyy, Bolsonaro Charged w/ Bryan Callen | PBD Podcast | Ep. 549

5103.457

I think what Trump also is good at, though, is when he comes to the negotiating table, he'll hit you with an outrageous claim, and then we'll scale it back from there. Yeah. Right. Like that's don't don't don't. By the way, don't take him at face value every time when he comes out of the gate. Sometimes he comes out hard and strong and outrageous, knowing that you're going to counter.

PBD Podcast

DOGE Dividend Checks, Trump vs. Zelenskyy, Bolsonaro Charged w/ Bryan Callen | PBD Podcast | Ep. 549

5121.853

And this is how we negotiate. And at the end of the day, Biden couldn't get a piece on the books. I'm telling you, this guy at the end of the day is probably going to achieve this piece. And that's better than having this war rage on. And so and that's this is what he does. He's colorful. Final thoughts.

PBD Podcast

DOGE Dividend Checks, Trump vs. Zelenskyy, Bolsonaro Charged w/ Bryan Callen | PBD Podcast | Ep. 549

5209.597

It's freaking irrelevant. Listen. Focus on the $7,000 versus the $3,000 rent, and then we'll figure out what we want to do. Can we choose?

PBD Podcast

DOGE Dividend Checks, Trump vs. Zelenskyy, Bolsonaro Charged w/ Bryan Callen | PBD Podcast | Ep. 549

5254.939

Look, look, look, Vinny, $36 trillion debt. A trillion seconds is 32,000 years. Let me say it again. Okay. A trillion seconds. So our debt right now, I think, is $36 trillion. That's, that is, is that three, what is that? So it's $1,000 billion for a trillion. So that's a whole lot of zeros. That's $36,700 billion. Yes. Okay? So there you go.

PBD Podcast

DOGE Dividend Checks, Trump vs. Zelenskyy, Bolsonaro Charged w/ Bryan Callen | PBD Podcast | Ep. 549

5428.623

Are you following it? Look, she's 26. That's so wonderfully creepy. Is he in his 50s? God bless you. When you have that kind of money. Listen, bring her up for a sec. I don't know what to say about that. She's a beautiful woman. Do you know who she is? I don't. Very pretty. I don't have any idea, dude. I don't know how to make sense of this.

PBD Podcast

DOGE Dividend Checks, Trump vs. Zelenskyy, Bolsonaro Charged w/ Bryan Callen | PBD Podcast | Ep. 549

5453.735

I guess he had a kid with her and then they were outing her and then she basically. Adam, what are your thoughts on this? I'm the wrong guy to ask.

PBD Podcast

DOGE Dividend Checks, Trump vs. Zelenskyy, Bolsonaro Charged w/ Bryan Callen | PBD Podcast | Ep. 549

5528.854

Wait, hold on. So I think, is this her tweet? Elon, we have been trying to communicate for the past several days, and you have not responded. When are you going to reply to us instead of publicly responding to smears from an individual who just posted photos of me in underwear at 15 years old? Whoa. Whoa. Whoa. Who did that? So that's at least a little proof that they're in touch. How about that?

PBD Podcast

DOGE Dividend Checks, Trump vs. Zelenskyy, Bolsonaro Charged w/ Bryan Callen | PBD Podcast | Ep. 549

5552.627

Oh, yeah, they're in touch. But she kind of went to Twitter to get in touch with them or something.

PBD Podcast

DOGE Dividend Checks, Trump vs. Zelenskyy, Bolsonaro Charged w/ Bryan Callen | PBD Podcast | Ep. 549

5833.551

I'm just saying. I'm a businessman, Patrick. That's on the dude.

PBD Podcast

DOGE Dividend Checks, Trump vs. Zelenskyy, Bolsonaro Charged w/ Bryan Callen | PBD Podcast | Ep. 549

5846.544

Can I just say something? As a guy, it's great you're trying to populate the earth. As a guy who has four children, being a father is more important. And I don't know how you have time to father 13 kids. So sometimes a little criticism... toward these guys might be appropriate. You're having 13 kids, Nick Cannon, all these guys. I'm sorry. That's the one thing I can't respect.

PBD Podcast

DOGE Dividend Checks, Trump vs. Zelenskyy, Bolsonaro Charged w/ Bryan Callen | PBD Podcast | Ep. 549

5871.103

You got children, bro. Raise your kids. My kids, my four kids, all that matters is that I'm a good father. I don't have time. I don't know how you have time with that. 13 kids? Come on, man.

PBD Podcast

DOGE Dividend Checks, Trump vs. Zelenskyy, Bolsonaro Charged w/ Bryan Callen | PBD Podcast | Ep. 549

6069.359

Actually, there's a caveat to this. So in Germany, since World War II, after the Nuremberg trials, The denial of the Holocaust or Nazi propaganda is what is punishable by jail, and this has been happening in Germany for a long time. This is not new. This is just a new story, but this has always been the law in Germany, okay?

PBD Podcast

DOGE Dividend Checks, Trump vs. Zelenskyy, Bolsonaro Charged w/ Bryan Callen | PBD Podcast | Ep. 549

6093.975

And what probably happened here is this guy posted something that was pro-Nazi, Nazi paraphernalia, or the denial of the Holocaust. When you do that in Germany, since I think 1948, It has been illegal. And that's what that's what's really going on.

PBD Podcast

DOGE Dividend Checks, Trump vs. Zelenskyy, Bolsonaro Charged w/ Bryan Callen | PBD Podcast | Ep. 549

61.724

Every time I see you, a little part of me dies. I got to start dressing better. I need bespoke shoes with a patina sheen. And I want my suits tailored to my body.

PBD Podcast

DOGE Dividend Checks, Trump vs. Zelenskyy, Bolsonaro Charged w/ Bryan Callen | PBD Podcast | Ep. 549

6120.449

Right. Well, in England, people are in jail right now for posting what is considered things that incite violence towards immigrants. So if you say something like, I don't think these people should be in my country, you can go to jail.

PBD Podcast

DOGE Dividend Checks, Trump vs. Zelenskyy, Bolsonaro Charged w/ Bryan Callen | PBD Podcast | Ep. 549

6263.852

Hey, by the way, you know who agrees with him? Most Europeans. You know who doesn't? The elites there. Of course. They were all really mad about that.

PBD Podcast

DOGE Dividend Checks, Trump vs. Zelenskyy, Bolsonaro Charged w/ Bryan Callen | PBD Podcast | Ep. 549

6292.05

If we can't, but just at the beginning of... Because they're weaponizing free speech, he said. Yeah, that's what he says.

PBD Podcast

DOGE Dividend Checks, Trump vs. Zelenskyy, Bolsonaro Charged w/ Bryan Callen | PBD Podcast | Ep. 549

6382.742

The irony of what they do, the irony of these laws, is they are going to usher in extreme right-wing parties. That's how it happens. Because what happens is people go, really? You want to do this to me? I'm going with that guy.

PBD Podcast

DOGE Dividend Checks, Trump vs. Zelenskyy, Bolsonaro Charged w/ Bryan Callen | PBD Podcast | Ep. 549

6397.785

And so those guys inadvertently are going to usher in an extremist government, if they're not careful, or parties that are not exactly in the middle or nuanced in their thinking. So, you know, the left never ceases to amaze me in how restricted they can be. Free speech, guys. You know why you want free speech? You know why? Watch this. You're allowed to say whatever you want, because guess what?

PBD Podcast

DOGE Dividend Checks, Trump vs. Zelenskyy, Bolsonaro Charged w/ Bryan Callen | PBD Podcast | Ep. 549

6424.934

You might change my mind, or if I disagree with you, it forces me to bolster...

PBD Podcast

DOGE Dividend Checks, Trump vs. Zelenskyy, Bolsonaro Charged w/ Bryan Callen | PBD Podcast | Ep. 549

6431.156

my position it forces me to stress test why i believe what i believe it's how we stay it's how we grow it's how we change our minds and it's how we fortify the truth that we stand on and if you don't have that stress test coming from from you at all different angles and you have parameters on speech then you're never gonna you're never gonna get honest you're

PBD Podcast

DOGE Dividend Checks, Trump vs. Zelenskyy, Bolsonaro Charged w/ Bryan Callen | PBD Podcast | Ep. 549

6473.779

Bro, on my short semi-jacket. Look, even Peabody has it on. I'm looking good, right, bro? Not bad.

PBD Podcast

DOGE Dividend Checks, Trump vs. Zelenskyy, Bolsonaro Charged w/ Bryan Callen | PBD Podcast | Ep. 549

6487.004

The next time I come here, I'm doing it. I'd love to see what you look like. It's progressing.

PBD Podcast

DOGE Dividend Checks, Trump vs. Zelenskyy, Bolsonaro Charged w/ Bryan Callen | PBD Podcast | Ep. 549

661.363

if it's true yeah i thought this was already kind of debunked did you read this which is this this so the the the fact that all these social security things for 350 year old that these were records of people and a lot of these social security numbers have been recycled stolen let me read this and then you debunk it go ahead rob play the clip and we'll go through it go for it there is one person on social security who's 360 years old

PBD Podcast

DOGE Dividend Checks, Trump vs. Zelenskyy, Bolsonaro Charged w/ Bryan Callen | PBD Podcast | Ep. 549

6955.111

When you see those guys come in and they're dressed, it's a fashion show now with the football players. Is this a new thing or has that always been the case? Of fashion? Well, you see like Travis Kelce, he's dressed like a 70s fan. Walking through the tunnel is a new segment. It's a relatively new segment.

PBD Podcast

DOGE Dividend Checks, Trump vs. Zelenskyy, Bolsonaro Charged w/ Bryan Callen | PBD Podcast | Ep. 549

7209.801

And you look at how... It becomes too much of a business, huh? Everybody's their own island.

PBD Podcast

DOGE Dividend Checks, Trump vs. Zelenskyy, Bolsonaro Charged w/ Bryan Callen | PBD Podcast | Ep. 549

7270.278

8 p.m. Eastern? My show at the Miami Improv. I mean, you know what I'm saying? Well, I mean, cocky's fun, but Brian Callen for an hour? No, no, forgive me. Do you believe in miracles? You know what I'm saying? Brian Callen is performing at the Miami Improv. How dare we even compare USA against Canada? Maybe you'll come out. Maybe you'll come out, for God's sake. Are you performing tonight?

PBD Podcast

DOGE Dividend Checks, Trump vs. Zelenskyy, Bolsonaro Charged w/ Bryan Callen | PBD Podcast | Ep. 549

7292.989

Tonight, two shows tomorrow, two shows Saturday. Take your pick. I roll out the red carpet. You come to the green room. We laugh. We hug.

PBD Podcast

DOGE Dividend Checks, Trump vs. Zelenskyy, Bolsonaro Charged w/ Bryan Callen | PBD Podcast | Ep. 549

7300.832

You get free water. You get to laugh hard for at least an hour and seven minutes.

PBD Podcast

DOGE Dividend Checks, Trump vs. Zelenskyy, Bolsonaro Charged w/ Bryan Callen | PBD Podcast | Ep. 549

7408.806

I can break a horse, brother. Oh, Daniel. That's sexy. Did you see that?

PBD Podcast

DOGE Dividend Checks, Trump vs. Zelenskyy, Bolsonaro Charged w/ Bryan Callen | PBD Podcast | Ep. 549

7417.75

Yes, dude. Dude. What was it? 15 years ago. Yes. It was a horse show. Maybe more. Maybe more. Yeah, maybe more. What were you guys doing there? I had my kids. My daughter wanted to. She was a horse. It's a sick show. The amount of money I spent on horses for my kid, my ex and my daughter who would ride horses, my accountant calls me and he goes, how's the album going? I go, what?

PBD Podcast

DOGE Dividend Checks, Trump vs. Zelenskyy, Bolsonaro Charged w/ Bryan Callen | PBD Podcast | Ep. 549

7438.544

He goes, how's the album? What's it like to play for all those people? I go, it's Brian Callen. I mean, I play for people and not that many. He goes, you're not a rock star? I go... No, he goes, well, then stop spending like these horses. You're going to be broke. That's a good accountant. That's good. That's a good accountant. You know what he said to me?

PBD Podcast

DOGE Dividend Checks, Trump vs. Zelenskyy, Bolsonaro Charged w/ Bryan Callen | PBD Podcast | Ep. 549

7453.854

He goes, what kind of car do you want to drive? I said, what do you mean? He goes, for what you pay for these horses, what do you want? I go, what can I drive? He goes, pick anything. Pick any car you could drive that car right now. Wow.

PBD Podcast

DOGE Dividend Checks, Trump vs. Zelenskyy, Bolsonaro Charged w/ Bryan Callen | PBD Podcast | Ep. 549

7522.298

What? What are we talking about? No steroids. No steroids. Bro.

PBD Podcast

DOGE Dividend Checks, Trump vs. Zelenskyy, Bolsonaro Charged w/ Bryan Callen | PBD Podcast | Ep. 549

7527.502

That's some Assyrian genetics, bro. Say something. That's from generations of persecution. We're warriors.

PBD Podcast

DOGE Dividend Checks, Trump vs. Zelenskyy, Bolsonaro Charged w/ Bryan Callen | PBD Podcast | Ep. 549

7565.632

My voice changed. I was like, Benny, where are we going? You got shaved marks.

PBD Podcast

DOGE Dividend Checks, Trump vs. Zelenskyy, Bolsonaro Charged w/ Bryan Callen | PBD Podcast | Ep. 549

759.213

So what they're finding, I guess, is number one, a lot of Social Security numbers that are out there have been... recycled, taken from people that are dead by illegal immigrants. That's the one thing. That's actually the real story. And as far as this is concerned, this I think was an error when they did the accounting.

PBD Podcast

DOGE Dividend Checks, Trump vs. Zelenskyy, Bolsonaro Charged w/ Bryan Callen | PBD Podcast | Ep. 549

777.986

So those social security numbers of people that are dead are still registered in a database. And so they picked those up by accident. So I believe all of this has already been debunked. So this is the worry that I have as we're trying to audit the government and we're trying to make a difference here.

PBD Podcast

DOGE Dividend Checks, Trump vs. Zelenskyy, Bolsonaro Charged w/ Bryan Callen | PBD Podcast | Ep. 549

7773.383

I thought you were going with the coffee for closers. That's the line.

PBD Podcast

DOGE Dividend Checks, Trump vs. Zelenskyy, Bolsonaro Charged w/ Bryan Callen | PBD Podcast | Ep. 549

7781.646

Again, it's what Trump does. He'll start with something like crazy and say something, and people go, whoa, hold on, that's crazy, 25%. And then, you know, we're starting to negotiate. Relax. That's how it starts. I'm throwing some things out. Your low ball or your high ball, and then you go and you meet in the middle. I'll give you $10 for the house.

PBD Podcast

DOGE Dividend Checks, Trump vs. Zelenskyy, Bolsonaro Charged w/ Bryan Callen | PBD Podcast | Ep. 549

7925.253

And I'm going to tell you this right now. I've seen sparrows land on his shoulders. And I've seen squirrels run up his legs. And with Adam, I've seen rats and crows land on my back. And that's when you know that he's evil. Scarecrow. That's true. If it's rats and crows, it's bad. Squirrels and sparrows.

PBD Podcast

DOGE Dividend Checks, Trump vs. Zelenskyy, Bolsonaro Charged w/ Bryan Callen | PBD Podcast | Ep. 549

795.475

We can't get distracted by the sensational stories because a lot of times this is taking our eye off.

PBD Podcast

DOGE Dividend Checks, Trump vs. Zelenskyy, Bolsonaro Charged w/ Bryan Callen | PBD Podcast | Ep. 549

82.355

And I'll say Stefano. Stefano. This is Stefano Ricci. Why? What's the problem?

PBD Podcast

DOGE Dividend Checks, Trump vs. Zelenskyy, Bolsonaro Charged w/ Bryan Callen | PBD Podcast | Ep. 549

915.603

The bottom line is there is waste. We just don't want to get distracted by these...

PBD Podcast

DOGE Dividend Checks, Trump vs. Zelenskyy, Bolsonaro Charged w/ Bryan Callen | PBD Podcast | Ep. 549

921.187

these stories so but it's not is it saying true or false it's not it's just reporting it it's not even giving you the it's yeah usually there's like a mostly true true false it's not but this has mostly been i think it's been by conservative journalists like like the spectator i'm sorry by by uh uh what the heck's it called um

PBD Podcast

DOGE Dividend Checks, Trump vs. Zelenskyy, Bolsonaro Charged w/ Bryan Callen | PBD Podcast | Ep. 549

942.802

commentary magazine, like the conservative magazines, they have debunked this. It's not that there isn't a lot of waste in government and that this isn't a good audit that we're going to find. When they do this audit, you guys, it's so funny how we're talking about USAID. That's adorable. Wait till they get to Medicaid and Medicare. Wait till they get to the Pentagon. It's going to be insane.

PBD Podcast

DOGE Dividend Checks, Trump vs. Zelenskyy, Bolsonaro Charged w/ Bryan Callen | PBD Podcast | Ep. 549

969.739

Do you know that there was an idea? The idea was when, during the Cold War, there was the idea that we're going to spend, and we let the Soviets know, we're going to spend $500 on a screw because we can, and you guys can't keep up with it. There was actually a culture of that. And that was almost a deliberate sort of, like, effort, a propaganda effort.

PBD Podcast

DOGE Dividend Checks, Trump vs. Zelenskyy, Bolsonaro Charged w/ Bryan Callen | PBD Podcast | Ep. 549

990.265

But when you see how much fraud there is in those agencies... Buckle up.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

1000.303

I just don't want to be played.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

10001.135

You know what I think meditation does? I think the point is, and I don't meditate a lot, is to get out of the way. To get out of the way.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

10013.866

I heard a sports psychologist say that. He teaches baseball players. He would teach them.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

10017.689

he would do this mantra which was one two get out of the way so when you're trying to hit a ball because it's really precise and you can't be overthinking you've got to just be totally reactive right your your your eye and your hands have to be married and motherfuckers are throwing 100 mile an hour balls and shit like yeah and um you ever you ever done that you ever stood in at a plate and had guys throw 100 miles an hour i have

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

10042.39

I have.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

10043.17

It's fucking terrifying. The idea of hitting that thing. Dude, it's terrifying. Yeah. But I wanted to try it and I wanted to see what it was like. And when your job depends on it, when everything rides on it, you better get out of your own way. And guys get the yips. That's why guys will go on hitting streaks and then they'll go on long dry spells because they get in their own way.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

1005.227

You know what I mean, though? I don't want to be played. I don't know what's true anymore.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

10065.296

But I think part of like all of that meditation, Jamie, pull up the fucking Indian army. Did you see this? They were hiking in the Himalayas and they came across a Bodhisattva or a monk who was meditating in the snow and it was 40 below.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

10086.5

Yes, sir. You might want to bring this up so it can just... You know what Customano used to tell Mike Tyson?

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

10095.703

I love that.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

10110.365

Yeah, that's bad.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

10116.087

There's a guy meditating covered in snow. And it's fucking unbelievable. Whoa. That might be true, Bubba.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

10125.071

Yeah, they find these guys out there.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

10127.993

They find these guys.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

10132.128

But there's a guy covered in snow, and he's not moving. And the Indian Army came across him.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

10149.998

Well, you know those dudes in—you ever read Shantaram? You know those guys who take a vow to never sit down? They stand up. Oh, God.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

1015.896

You see? I told you. I'm already like, I don't know.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

10158.223

Their knees must be destroyed. They're the standing yogis. How bad are their knees? No, no. They get varicose veins. Their bodies, their feet start to melt. What? But they smoke copious amounts of weed. I mean, they're always high. Constantly.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

10172.731

But they take a vow never to ever, ever sit. They are standing their whole life. So they sleep standing up in slings.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

10181.275

Yeah. It doesn't.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

10184.577

You can look that up. Just to fuck you up some more.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

10195.717

Yeah, they're like the famous standing yogis or something they're called. Where from, maybe?

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

10200.942

India, I think in Calcutta.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

10212.569

Exactly. Please.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

10214.292

At the end of the day, they're trying to get laid.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

10221.158

I think a lot of people are dealing with trauma. I think a lot of times you're going to either kill yourself or do something crazy, right? Sometimes.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

10229.923

You know? I don't think you become a monk or a shaman. Joseph Campbell did a whole thing. Every shaman he studied – he was an expert at comparing Western and Eastern traditions. And he said every shaman – ever had gone through some kind of a mental breakdown, usually in their teens. And they came out of it because they had a society, a village that helped them through it.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

10252.222

That sort of like understood that it was a schizophrenic break, but they were going through something and there was something on the other side of that. So they wouldn't medicate them.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

10266.372

Yeah.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

10270.016

It's not a good... What did you have before?

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

10279.869

I saw that with my own eyes in 1984 in China. So this is how this guy stands.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

10290.382

Donations. No, they curved one leg. Left his arm in the air, too.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

10295.024

Forever. He keeps his arm up. Since 1973.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

10306.429

Yeah, I gave you two arms.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

10319.256

That's not the point, man.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

10336.678

What does he do? What is that forever? So that's black power.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

10341.361

That's white power.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

10344.002

If you extend your fingers, it's racist.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

10350.766

White power is just... Yeah, that's not... And Hitler did this.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

1036.589

The New York Post is very conservative.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

10371.994

That Justin Baldoni thing?

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

10373.995

When you see what the New York Times did to Baldoni, where they took every one of those things out of context, and Baldoni was like, really? How about I see you for $250 million? And he's got fucking 90 pages of receipts. It's going to be very interesting.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

10395.163

Yeah, I don't understand it.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

10409.229

Yeah, that's what I like about the marketplace. The marketplace will find people that you can rely on.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

10419.553

That's Elon Musk.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

10421.774

I feel like YouTube and now Facebook, they're all coming around.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

1043.901

But I got to tell you, I do think this is how there's a sea change here. You got to have people with opposing points of view that are pro-business, et cetera. You have just all progressives in Sacramento and if you've got on the city council. But you know what? Until Angelenos wake up and start voting for intelligent people- Who are not, forget right or left.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

10433.88

What is that? I don't understand that.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

10475.386

Tomorrow night. Tonight I'm doing two shows just to warm up. Theo Vaughn's stopping by, which I'm excited about.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

10482.63

Sold out already, all shows. Of course. Which is exciting. Of course.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

1065.69

How about practical people who understand infrastructure?

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

1070.335

Yeah.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

1071.596

Because the roads, I lived there, man. The roads, the fucking power line, it's all from 1950s, okay? So let's wake the fuck up.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

1088.348

Yes, I forgot about those from space. I wonder who's controlling those.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

1097.555

Yes, the invisible circle of Jews. Every conspiracy theory always goes right back to that. I'm just saying.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

1132.497

They blame the Black Plague on them. They're like, you guys cover your wells. My thing about that is whenever people go bad on the Jews, I'm always like, yeah. Do you like Hollywood? They invented that.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

1145.066

And stainless steel.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

1154.172

They're incredible. Nobody wants to.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

1156.854

Let's just talk about art and everything else. Einstein, Freud.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

119.335

You think? That's sitcom money.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

126.497

No, that's a high wage, sir. 750 grand for a city employer who's- For someone just like, fill that one. How the- How are the aquifers today? Get the water in that one. You know what? We got to protect the Delta smelt, whatever the fuck that is.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

1285.453

It goes on and on. How many comics?

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

13.04

My wife, I smoked one of these and I didn't brush my teeth. I woke up the next morning and my wife said, your breath is four dimensional.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

1309.186

I might be doing that, too, if my survival depended on it.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

1319.271

Let's set them up. Let's set them up. Have we ever, has there been any, what is with the list? Here's my theory on the Jeffrey Epstein thing. See what you think.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

1330.915

I think that the people are so powerful that I know in certain cases the lawyers go to the lawyers of these powerful people. And they go, how you doing? Now. Now. We got some evidence that your client, who's a family man and everything else, was banging girls on Jeffrey's Island.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

1358.47

Sure. Hey, dude. Hold on. What kind of podcast is this?

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

1366.126

As I put this shit cigar in my mouth.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

1373.07

Yeah, it's great. But I think what happened was there was a lot of money and every one of those fucking people got paid off. I think it just went away because there's money. They came to these really rich people and they were like, What's your privacy worth? What's your reputation worth? How about $10 million?

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

1422.159

I know.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

1423.2

He was very good at laundering money, I guess.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

1448.544

Right. He was like, this is a construct.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

1478.509

I would tell you his theory on what he thinks this whole thing is, this whole, you know, it's a simulation or whatever. Because, you know, so Newton, there's Newtonian physics, right, which is this matter here. And then there's quantum physics, study of the electron that Einstein was the pioneer of and blah, blah, blah.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

1497.009

So Einstein was working on what's called a theory of everything, which was the bridge. Because a lot of times the rules in this ether, in Newtonian, in the world that we live in, are different when it comes to gravity and light than they are on a quantum level. So what is the bridge? How do we bring them together? How do we reconcile both realities? Right. So that's the theory of everything.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

1518.16

So Eric is obsessed with that and kind of works on that.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

1522.182

Yeah, so his idea is that maybe the singularity is already here, and maybe we're already machines. So watch this. So we're already machines replicating better machines, better versions of ourselves. And it's kind of an interesting thing because it kind of dovetails with Buddhism, right? So watch this. I'm going to do an experiment on you that a Buddhist Rinpoche will ask somebody.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

1544.26

Oh, should I get prepared? Get in the lotus position. There it is. Oh. There it is. Dude, good breathing. I'm ready. Good breathing.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

158.441

Here's my whole philosophy. You guys know, you know that we have a Tinder box. You can say there are a lot of people that live there. The fires are always a potential. If that's the case, then please make sure the fire hydrants... We've got to be able to figure it out. California came up with AI. Silicon Valley was pretty innovative people.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

1584.357

And then you come.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

1588.299

It doesn't work for me.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

1596.542

I'm busy, dude.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

1600.004

I'll just lick a toad.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

1604.45

My buddy did that shit. He did the toad thing.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

1607.451

He called me up. He goes, everything's different now. I'm like, all right, calm down.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

1613.493

Yeah, allegedly.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

1658.185

Yeah, you hear those guys a lot. That's kind of why I'm... Like Zen masters will say, I have nothing to teach you because once you, the part of you. So the idea would be you can't improve yourself. What? Because the part of you that wants to improve yourself is the part that needs improving.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

1675.797

So until you get out of, until you get out of your own way and you realize that you, this, this construct called yourself is an imagined construct. You've invented this. So like Sam Harrison, he studies the Vedanta, right? So in his book, Spirituality Without Religion, he does this experiment, which the Buddhists will have you do. They'll say, so you're watching me right now. I'm talking.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

1700.31

Now, there's this guy named Joe Rogan, okay? And we know Joe Rogan's got this. But for a second, try to locate where you really are. In other words, where are you actually listening to me from? Where are you? Where is the seat of your attention? Are you behind your face? Are you here? And if you try to do that, it's kind of impossible to locate where...

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

1751.501

Come on.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

1758.331

I turned to the other member. He's not ready yet. He's not ready. We have to break him down further.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

1771.943

Because the idea would be you can observe your brain, so you can observe your thoughts. You can observe your body, and you can observe your emotions. You can actually step outside and watch that stuff. And they get really good at that. They get really good at realizing that you're none of those things. You might be the observer, whoever that is or whatever that is. And that's kind of where they...

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

1791.528

It's kind of an interesting exercise. That's why you see these dudes, that guy, that monk who set himself on fire, right, in 1963. Oh, the Vietnam photo? Now, David Halberstam from the New York Times said he didn't make a sound. They watched him, and he literally, they heard the air leave his lungs, and he just fell over.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

180.588

Let's figure out a way to keep the fucking... Very different people.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

1812.995

Well, she was also probably asleep or something.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

1817.056

Jesus Christ.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

1825.744

Yeah, but he also didn't move.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

1829.628

So he left his body. He was watching himself. That would be the idea behind- That's what they would say.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

1838.757

Yeah. Well, have you seen those videos? How about when the Indian Army went up? This is recent. That is such a fucking crazy photo.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

1853.18

To protest the way the president of South Vietnam at the time, who was a staunch Roman Catholic, was treating Buddhists. And he said, please have some compassion and lit himself on fire.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

1862.483

What a bad motherfucker.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

1872.129

Because you're attached to a sensation.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

1878.132

If you burn me with this cigar, I'd be like, fuck it! I can't do that.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

191.914

Well, get some people down in government who are innovative like that. What the fuck are we doing? I don't want to do that job. Do you know the city council of Los Angeles? Four of the members of the city council are far left social Democrats. How about that? There's zero pushback on ideas. It's just all ideology.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

2020.674

Yeah, when we were younger, both you and I, we'd start shouting our opinion. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It was about winning.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

2043.722

I feel like I did a little bit, too. Yeah.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

2050.726

Yeah, like 13.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

2057.211

That's what my aunt and uncle said. They go, we just can't believe you're not in jail or fucking on drugs.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

2065.857

My parents were awesome, though.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

2078.126

That's right.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

2199.77

Fidelity to authority, too.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

2203.892

And also, the left has also become very good at destruction in a lot of ways. I'm not saying the right doesn't have its problems, but the left has become... Like, you and I were talking about this. Like, if you disagree with the left, they will come after everything. Everything. The right kind of goes, you're an idiot, and they'll make fun of you and do a meme about you. Yeah.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

2221.878

But the left, you know, and that's... That's what I call the make or break machine. You know, if you look at, um, and this is one of the things I talk about with my, my specialists that just, you, you, you take Caitlyn Jenner who came out, uh, Bruce Jenner has an operation for eight, eight hours comes as, as, as Caitlyn Jenner. A minute later, it was an eight hour.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

2241.196

The first one was about eight hours on the face. Did a great job by the way. By the way, how about this? Can I just say this? Like, don't say you'd fuck her. No, no, no. Take it easy. But I'm just saying. Don't say it. I'm just saying. You're thinking of saying it. How about a little something for the surgeon? He should have won artist of the year. Bruce Jenner was a 65-year-old man.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

2256.571

Looked like a 45-year-old woman. Came out of it. But a minute later, won woman of the year. All right, dude. Listen, we all have our taste, okay? I'm sorry.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

2270.052

I'm saying with makeup on Glamour magazine, look very good.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

2278.021

A real athlete.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

2287.011

That's why I don't take any advice on health from 26-year-olds.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

2297.533

I got to warm my feet up in the morning.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

2304.455

Correct. I'm calcifying, motherfucker. None of your shit's going to help my calcification. I'm dying. I have arthritis. So do I. Yeah. So do I. I got to warm my feet up before I get out of the car. Okay? I have a whole thing about that, but... You know, that's the reality of getting older.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

2342.357

I know. He's got a thick neck. He's got a perm. He's actually handsome. He's wearing a jewel. He's wearing his jewelry. Very expensive watch. He looks great.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

2353.286

How much was it?

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

2386.768

I was telling you this the other day. I think his political transformation is interesting because, now there's a cynical view. It's from jujitsu. Agreed. When you do MMA and you're around other men and your testosterone goes up, you start to feel your body. You put your hands on the world. You're going to have a different perspective, for real. It's going to change.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

24.351

Of course I didn't brush my teeth before I went to bed. Give a fuck. You know what I mean? You're married. You're married. She was like, I love you so much. Your breath is four dimensional. You know, these fires.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

2407.902

They have done studies, I believe, Jamie, you can look this up, where when they raise a man's testosterone, he becomes more conservative, more right wing.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

2451.774

And now his whole life up here. Now he's down here.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

2464.439

Yeah. His voice sounds different even. Yeah, he's good. He's becoming a man. Well, fucking broke. Men are raised by women in our schools and stuff. And because of this, probably in the past 30 years, masculinity was always considered, they were taught it's a liability.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

2506.134

Yeah.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

2516.217

Well, the woke ideology had a major problem, which was it was reductive. Right? It would reduce a complicated world to a binary world, which is ironic, by the way. But it would sort of say, I can solve all this. There are oppressors and oppressed. There's power and powerless people.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

2535.583

black and white also there's no forgiveness zero forgiveness don't apologize they'll really crucify you and you can't there's no retribution there's no way to come back but my 13 year old son you can see these kids now at 13 don't start talking to him about this shit because these kids are like they've already been they figured it out at 13 I'm telling you my son was like I don't feel I don't like this shit I want to do jujitsu and wrestle all the time fuck off also podcasts correct

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

2594.556

I have a whole joke about that. It's like there are a couple of things. My whole joke is this. I can't call my friends. I had this joke. I was like, if I call my friends and I'm like, I'm sad, my friends can call me. You got the wrong number, pussy. And it's like, Joe Rogan, that's a mean way to talk to me, you know? But it's true. I remember one time I called you. This is fucking great.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

2612.711

I called you and I remember my audition went bad and it was like the third, I would get right there. I was about to, and back then, remember, if you got a TV show, your money problems were gone for a while. All I thought about was I get to drink great wine and buy a fucking house and take a minute, right?

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

2628.237

you're thinking of a nice car remember that and I fucking called you and I go like this I go fuck dude I don't know I was good and he goes you can't be good you gotta be great I go I know I know I know I just I don't know I'm just I don't know I just can't I can't figure it out and I was bummed right and I was basically saying I'm sad and you fucking go you go yeah and he goes what do you want to do tonight I go I don't know I just let it down he goes

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

2648.404

Hey, you'll be all right. Let's just fucking go out and eat and do something. You'll figure it out. Fucking relax. Don't get all mopey about this shit. I was like, okay. And that was it.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

270.467

My favorite was that one of the women said, you want people to look like you.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

275.91

And I'm like, hey, listen, hey, lady, when my house is on fire and I'm trying to get my kids out, I'm not going to be like, hey, can I get some people that look like me? Because this doesn't make me feel safe.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

2813.345

I remember you bought that Acura, the new Acura.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

2815.867

Yeah, dude. I loved it. You used to pick me up in that shit. I was like, what the fuck?

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

2868.965

You remember when I was doing that? I finally got my own show. I'm doing those shows. I was like, I fucking do it. I don't like this. I want to do stand-up now. Now I told you. The cool thing about being 57, I'm enjoying stand-up more now than I ever have. Well, you're smarter now.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

2900.77

In his 60s, hilarious.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

291.179

They can be white as the driven snow. If they look like a white walker and they can get me out of that fucking fire, I'm in. I want Brian Shaw.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

299.484

With a mustache that goes like this.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

304.287

I'm so gay that when I saw they came by, I saw some firemen, and I didn't know what to do. I wanted to say something like, go get them, guys, or something like that. And I literally went like this. I went – I saluted them.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

3062.688

Tom is the best. So did I. So did I. I was in college. And I was at the Improv in New York, and my father took me to, we sat there and watched Dom Herrera. I remember that's why when I come off stage at the Laugh Factory, and I was still a little in awe of Dom. And Dom goes, Bri, come over here. And I was like, oh, maybe he's going to give me some pointers, you know.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

3084.188

And I go, he goes, you know what I love about your act? I go, what? And he goes, you don't go for the laughs.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

3124.203

He's a real comic, man.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

32.895

I have two small children now because what I want to do is what you want to do is you want to get divorced and then you want to have get married again to a woman who's 23 years younger and then have two more kids because that's good.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

321.486

Yeah, but my wife is so funny because my wife is very handy, and I said – And we had an evacuation where I looked at her and I go, I got to go do Joe's podcast and then shoot my special at the mothership. But I feel guilty about leaving you here. And she goes, what are you going to do? You can't change a tire. I got this.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

3221.231

So it doesn't matter if it's solids or strips?

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

3304.559

Yeah. But I'm saying when you master something like that, I'm not saying your marriage is going to be great. I'm saying when you master something like that, it's a very good way to really get to know yourself.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

3329.23

Why? Do you know?

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

3382.569

So he changed to a different –

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

3427.357

And when you have a match, how many games are you playing?

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

3437.905

Wait, a race, 120 games?

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

347.157

I'm in an area where I'm good.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

3485.084

That becomes a physical game too now. Now you're actually an athlete a little bit. Well, sort of.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

3491.868

Yeah, but your body can't break down.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

3496.671

You never get really big fatzos that can handle... There used to be a guy... What I love about The Hustler, one of the greatest movies ever with Paul Newman, is when Jackie... What the fuck's his name? Gleason. Jackie Gleason said, it really came down to character. He washed his hands, washed his face, and drew a blank and came back and beat him.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

3518.325

That was a really interesting lesson for me as a young man.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

3558.489

But everything at the highest level is those micro adjustments.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

3565.658

They say when Rafa Nadal is one of the greatest tennis players ever. When he won Wimbledon, they're all clapping. He comes in and the legend goes, I don't know if it's true, but I heard it makes sense. He's coming in and he's going like this. He goes, I think my grip, I think I want to, he's not even paying attention. He's talking to his coach.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

3581.45

I feel like my grip should be just a little bit like that or still making micro adjustments. You just won Wimbledon.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

3600.36

But isn't stand-up like, so I'm going to shoot this special, and I'm going to throw it away, and I've got to start again. And just because I've done five specials doesn't mean it's going to be easier. It's going to be a motherfucker because I've got to come up with – I've got to make sure I don't repeat myself. I've got to make sure I'm not – You've got to have something to say.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

3615.648

You've got something to say? You can't get calcified?

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

3640.843

Do you ever get tired of talking to – do you ever get tired of doing this podcast even though you have very interesting people?

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

3670.031

I like trying to think about- Yeah, because you have a lot of problem solvers on this podcast, too.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

3674.034

You know?

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

3678.458

Yeah.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

3682.461

We all were. Yeah. I think what was interesting is we would, I'd have these opinions and I'd, I'd, I'd state these truths and then like somebody would Google it and be like, Hey, Hey dude, no. It's like I had this hilarious fucking typical Brian. I'm talking about cows, grass fed, all this shit. Hey, Hey man, I've never been on a farm. Okay. Never, never raised cows.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

3705.261

The farmer goes, Hey, I love your podcast. Brian's wrong about everything he said, but it's cool. I fucking emailed the guy back, you know, I'm talking to him. And he gave me an education. He's like, I mean, what you're saying is just not true when it comes to how you raise cows. And there was a thousand things, of course, I had no idea. That's the biggest liability, I think, in a lot of ways.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

3765.01

Farming is no joke.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

3806.04

Yeah, this is like Mike Catherwood. You know Mike? Great guy. Do you know Mike Catherwood? He was on Loveline.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

3813.65

And he lives in Austin.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

3816.852

Psycho Mike Hathaway. That's right. So Mike comes down with his wife, who's an actress, and they're like, I'm going to be in Austin on the outskirts, and I want to live on a farm. Did he move here? Yeah, he's a kid from L.A. He goes, I get here, and we got guinea fowl. We got little sheep. We got rabbits. We got all— And fucking the snakes are eating all my eggs.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

3840.447

The guinea fowl getting decimated by coyotes, foxes, whatever the fuck it is out there. I mean, everything's dying. I'm just getting decimated by hawks coming in. I'll take your bunnies. That's adorable. You think you can raise bunnies? So they're just getting decimated. Guess what they did? What's the one change they made?

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

3856.983

They got two Anatolian shepherds.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

3860.025

And bro, he said, even the fucking snakes are on those. He's like, those fucking dogs are just like, coyotes? Excuse me, sir?

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

3872.131

And they're not pets.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

3873.352

Not indoor pets.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

3874.413

Those fucking things will just patrol your grounds, and anything on four legs is going to pay a very dear price.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

3909.214

I got some kids.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

3919.706

Yeah.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

3922.389

Count me in. I'll wear a tweed jacket. I'll smoke cigars. I'm not going to do any of the work, but I'll supervise.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

3940.43

But what if you had out like a big pond with fish? Yeah. So you can fish.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

4065.978

You had land you can shoot your own... Let me tell you about freshwater fish. Yeah?

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

4122.588

Yeah, mercury is not good for the body.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

414.672

Did I ever tell you the conversation I had with Arnold Schwarzenegger? I was with John Leguizamo.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

4200.033

Decimated.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

4206.3

Well, that was the Great Migration, right? So from the South, a huge number of black people went up to Detroit looking for jobs. And the problem was when they got to there, first of all, the auto industry started to get decimated because it started to move toward Japan and different countries. In the 50s? I can't remember. See when the Great Migration was. It was before that.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

422.395

This was before that. I was doing that movie.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

4227.617

Well, they had jobs and there was a whole thriving community. But really what happened also is that the auto workers union, I'm sorry, but it kept black people out of it. There's a lot of racism that went on. So a lot of people couldn't find jobs.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

425.016

Screw your freedom.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

4258.57

Escaping Jim Crow laws.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

4260.631

Didn't work out.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

4268.592

Well, it was like the Puerto Rican exodus from Puerto Rico to New York. They went up there looking for manufacturing jobs. Then the manufacturing jobs coincided with moving south. So you had this massive number of people who didn't have anywhere to go.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

4323.094

Well, the biggest thing that every mainstream publication is in crisis, and I think they've earned it. They've deserved it. The New York Times still makes money, but primarily not because of their articles that people read. It's primarily because they're crosswords. They're puzzles.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

4340.248

But when you take things out of context and you have journalists that are 26 years old and have an ideological bent, the rest of us are going, the news doesn't reflect the world I live in. Whatever the fuck you're saying, I don't know who this is. I've never seen this. I live in a very different world. And it's going to be interesting to see.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

4361.498

I think there's a liability, though, where podcasts take the place of mainstream media in some ways, because then you have somebody who's very good at talking for three hours and they can really sway a lot of people. But that's one side of their story. So now you have just that.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

4378.862

So you have to be careful because sometimes it could just move things over here where, again, the truth is somewhere in the middle a lot of times or it's more nuanced or there's just more to know.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

4453.904

What's the evidence, too?

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

4463.291

Well, it's also about ratings, right?

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

4482.769

No. No. No. What do you mean?

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

4488.523

Imagine if I was, like, saying things. Yeah, how'd that come across? Can we do that again?

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

4494.505

You didn't even catch it. Oh, you fucker. Oh, wait a minute. Hey, you motherfucker. You're saying that Mark Zuckerberg and Mel Gibson get better ratings than me? This is bullshit. Occasionally.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

4505.409

You fuck.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

4537.33

on a podcast or whatever, when they say, you guys, all those people over there are wrong. I'm the one whistleblower. I figured out I'm the one. Now you do have Mavericks, but I always am weary of when I hear somebody go, all that, the entire medical establishment is wrong. And I'm right. And I go, I don't think so. I just don't think you know enough. I don't think you as one person.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

4562.173

I'm not going to just put all my bags. There is something called a scientific consensus. Sometimes that can be a bullshit consensus. We can be told that climate scientists all agree. It's not true. It's just how you get funding. So sometimes the incentive structures are there.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

4578.007

Correct. Let's just be a little bit more, you know.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

4644.644

I also know some CIA people, like real CIA people. And you talk to them and it's like, they're always like this. They're always like, dude, I wish we were as competent as people say. I mean, if you were involved- Talk to Evan Hafer.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

4676.695

Same thing. I said to him, I went to his wedding, and I loved everybody there because they were all his closest friends. Evan was there and stuff, and that was the first time I met Evan.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

4685.559

And I'm just talking to these tier one guys and they just seemed so intelligent and they were so, and they were, and John Dudley was there and a lot of like great guys, but I'm talking to some pretty cool people, right? Who, who, who have done a lot with their life and they were well-rounded and everything else.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

4699.862

And I said, man, I just think it'd be so fun to be in that, in a tier one unit because they're just all so, they're so smart and they're just, they just have such a wide breadth of knowledge. And he goes, God, you're so fucking wrong. Yeah.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

4727.309

You better dot your I's, cross your T's.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

4730.11

That dude is so fucking smart. He's another guy who's very smart.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

4745.977

He's also a CL Team 6 guy, so he's got some physicality.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

4755.263

Leah is built like a true athlete.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

4759.565

You cannot be light in the ass.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

4761.507

Yeah.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

4779.819

My only regret is not going down that rabbit hole.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

4786.924

Yeah. You don't train much anymore, right?

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

48.469

Oh, dude, there's no financial stress at all. It's great. You know what? If I hustle until I'm 80, I'll be fine. Anyway. Oof. It's going to be really awkward when I call you at 75. I just need help this month. But anyway, so I fucking – I look at her and I go – she's like a girl from Jersey, like Irish-Italian chick, no nonsense. Been working since she was 16.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

4801.991

That happened to me the other day. I trained at this in Nono's MMA, who I love it, down in Hermosa. and I love doing it, but I, of course, I'm rolling with a 26-year-old, and I'm like, let's go, and of course, I'm 57, and I see his ankle. Don't give me your ankle, bro. I'm an ankle guy. I pick his ankle, drive him to the ground, fucking poke that ankle.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

4824.828

Had trouble looking left for 11 days. All right? Fucking worth it.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

4887.985

I don't get hurt when I'm rolling with somebody who's really good.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

4899.309

I like to talk shit to guys who are way better.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

4925.178

Well, part of that also, I think that one of the, people don't talk about this. I think the Dagestanis, the Russians, like Marab.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

4940.445

Dude, I thought I was straight this whole time. God damn, son.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

4946.474

I mean, that's a strong man is what I meant.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

4955.339

I think his coach is a gold medalist Olympic wrestler. Here's the thing about those guys. I think one of their advantages that nobody talks about is that when you get a guy like Khabib, you get these Dagestanis, you get these Russians, these Armenians and stuff. They've been training probably since they were six. And so what happens is your tendons and everything gets really, really strong.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

4977.106

And also, if you ever watch like Alexander Carell and the way they would warm up. Those guys, like Corellon could do a backflip, go splits and all that. Those guys, the way they warm up was, it was scientific.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

4988.854

And so, because they knew that the micro damage that happens, and so they would strengthen all the connective tissue first. And I think a lot of times, like guys like Marab, guys like Umar, Since they've been training so long, their bodies are different. They feel different. They are different. They're more rugged. So they don't get injured. They don't deal with injuries.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

5011.271

One of the biggest things that is hard for a lot of guys.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

5015.275

They might get injured. I think they get injured less. They probably do. Or they train differently.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

5036.697

Never.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

5043.086

developed to strike yeah but you also have to be like if you look at the the boxers like if you look floyd mayweather his father and his uncle said to him like they knew they were like boxing is just about as much about not getting hit like you can be great and everything else if if your emphasis isn't on every time you throw you got to be in a position where you're not going to get hit every time you step custom auto was that way too every time you you throw you step and

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

5068.164

And a huge part of that is it was all a foot game. And all of that is if you haven't been trained properly, as you're learning how to box, you're going to take a lot of damage. And you're fucked. You're fucked after a while. And if you look at those really good coaches, those old guys, Eddie Futch, who taught, who would teach the jab, your hand was here.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

5087.138

Because instead of here, you were taking shots, you would be here. So if you watch him fight with Ken Norton when he fought Ali – He said, when you fight Ali, Ali's here when he jabs. He's doing this. I want your hand here. So you can see Norton catching Ali's jab and then, boom, answering back and catching Ali in the face.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

5105.487

Those little details make literally all the difference in whether you box five more years or if you're done five years earlier.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

511.476

So I'm with John Leguizamo. We were doing that movie Ride Along. And John goes, hey, stick around. We'll have some dinner with a friend of mine that's coming by. I didn't know who it was. Arnold shows up with his assistant. It's kind of cool. And I'm a fan.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

5136.941

He wasn't Jermaine. I mean, what's his name? Trevante Davis or anything.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

5162.272

Those Dagestanis are made of different fucking... He's Chechnyan.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

5180.259

When you have your hands up with him, he'll still concuss you. Yeah. He hits that hard. Just basic two, like ones and twos, maybe a hook once in a while.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

522.483

So we're sitting there and I just read a book on California politics by Michael Lewis called Boomerang about sort of like how a lot of the towns like Stockton went broke because of the pension plans and all that shit. Blah, blah, blah.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

5224.244

He'll break your arms down.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

5256.756

Correct.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

5260.078

They're going to fight again?

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

5269.143

I think the best fighter, I think you can make an argument for certainly top three fighters of all time.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

5398.668

This is Usyk.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

540.171

It is that too, dude. It is that too. It's that too.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

5401.001

I think he's incredible.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

5402.503

I mean, I've watched every one of his fights. That dude is on such a different level.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

5407.651

He's fighting giants. He's fighting giants. When you're fighting a guy who's 60 pounds heavier with 10-ounce, 12-ounce gloves, it makes such a world of difference.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

5420.607

But please understand, Usyk fought at, I think, 75 when he started out. He's not a big, frank guy.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

5484.728

Let's go, Andy. Let's go. I like it. We've got to get you an accountant, though. Don't spend too much of your money on that.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

5499.756

I think there's also you've got to take the responsibility on of being a champion. It's hard to hold that. It's one thing. It's like starting a business. You can get people to know about your business. Running a business is very different.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

5531.588

That's why Jon Jones, to me, is just incredible.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

5549.981

The Cubans are amazing because they don't hit mitts. You'll have a guy, and they just move and move and move. And once in a while, the coach will lift a glove. About one shot. You know, move and move and move. It's all footwork.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

5560.114

It's all footwork.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

5621.523

What about cold plunges? That's controversial still, right?

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

566.183

Oh, because they drained it, right?

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

568.524

What the fuck? Look how big it was. What in the world?

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

5695.475

So Dan Gable said he would do a sauna after working out because it raised his endurance.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

572.928

And now it's just gone.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

5733.788

I did that in fucking Sweden where I was with all these Vikings. It's fucking so funny.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

577.315

Well, I guess we needed it to grow all the oranges, right?

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

5795.792

There's a scene in a book called Blood Meridian where the guy chops a dude's head off with that fucking knife. Let me see that. Who gave me this?

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

5809.889

I mean, that's a knife. I don't know what you'd do with this if you had to clear a brush.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

581.578

I mean, you know.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

5820.314

What is this? It's a hacking knife. Who gave me that? It's when you're coming in and you want to just clear a house.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

5834.346

What's the knife for? Just in case, bro.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

5845.571

Those axes look like they actually would work, too.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

5856.9

Wow.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

5868.009

Yeah, that's a ridiculous knife. That's an overkill. Do we know who gave it to me? If somebody wears that on their belt, I'm like, your dick is tiny. That's incredible.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

5884.8

Well, I want to see what happens because I think, first of all, rents are going to go through the roof. This is going to be crazy. Where's everybody going to live? It's a major housing shortage. This is a major problem.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

5900.21

I'll tell you what's going to happen, I think. I think people that own houses that are not in fire zones, even if they're small, are going to sell their houses for millions of dollars. Because you've got those very wealthy people going, I need a place, name a price. And your house might be worth $2 million, you're going to sell it for $4 million.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

5917.084

I mean, that's what's going to happen.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

5919.765

It's going to be completely fucked. And remember, Los Angeles has been the worst at building affordable housing or just housing in general. All the permitting you got to go through, all the red tape, they can't do it. There's so many issues. There's so many issues, but especially housing, especially. We have, what is it? I think the Poverty rate in Los Angeles is like second to none.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

5943.892

The schools are terrible. The homeless situation is, I think, the second. But hey, it's sunny.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

5954.018

There's a lot of TikTok stars, and that's good for our culture. That's good for our culture.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

5972.208

Yeah, I'm not doing that, but I appreciate it.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

5995.444

Well, I said to you when you signed that deal, I go, I say this to people about you. You've not changed even a little bit. Well, if anything, you've calmed down. You have peace of mind. But you've not changed as like in terms of like, you know, you become a very powerful, influential person. But I've never I haven't seen you change. I haven't seen you like it hasn't gone to your head. I said, why?

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

6016.724

And you go, I think it's because I do something really difficult every day. And it just reminds me of what a bitch I am.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

603.737

Oh, look at that. God bless him. God bless him. Dude, that's when you're really trying.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

6047.44

Yeah, it's so bad for you. Comments. It's so bad for you. I've never read one, especially good ones. I don't want to hear it because it's going to have power over me. I don't want to hear the good ones either.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

6073.76

You know that kid Matan? Matan? He's that kid, this Israeli kid who's like 17 years old and a complete troll. I did his podcast. It was so fun. But he's just like, those kids at that age, they are about just, there's no reverence to anything. No. They want to tear it all down.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

609.682

With his COVID mask on. That's just a last stand, bro. That's a last stand.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

6109.841

That's right.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

6214.161

I don't know if the blame lays in the fire department, by the way, here. I think, you watch, I'm going to make a prediction. I bet it's just already happening. I promise you that the progressive government in Los Angeles and in Sacramento is going to blame not infrastructure, not government incompetence, not mismanagement, but climate change.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

6253.189

So her sexual proclivity is really what makes it.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

6259.634

It's just ideas. Identity politics.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

6268.038

It's placing a group above an individual, right? So treat that person like an individual. I don't give a shit that she's into women. I don't care at all.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

6275.721

If she's competent, I'll fucking vote for her all day. I don't know if she is. I don't know enough about her record.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

629.296

Well, that video I showed you of my friend's house that just disappeared. And then you remember I sent you that video of him driving down the PCH. Those guys are coming to my house because where I'm at is the only place that's where the air is breathable and all that. Well, we have a barrier between the 405 and also the airport. So it's really we're pretty safe.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

6291.449

Until what happened? It got too expensive to do business. It got too expensive to shoot in L.A.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

6296.191

Taxes and everything else. It got too expensive. It is too expensive to open restaurants or anything else in L.A. So you've got this great sandwich chain I'm obsessed with called Snarf's, right? I just like their... I think they have one in Austin.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

6313.68

Yeah, I brought them here. Yeah. I love their sandwiches, dude. And... You know, that company is so good that I literally was... I want to get involved in the franchise business because I think they're crushing. And they will not open in Los Angeles. It's too expensive. There are too many... A friend of mine who you and I both know has businesses in Texas and businesses in Los Angeles.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

6338.037

And a lot of them, okay? I'll tell you who it is later. Ooh, I love a suspense. So in his California businesses... He's been sued over 1,000 times. I think it's 1,002 times. 1,002 times in the 18 years he's been in business. In Texas, he's been sued once. Once. And in that case, they were right to sue them because they did something wrong.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

6364.718

And it's pretty interesting because there's literally a difference in culture. There's a difference in the notion of I'm responsible for my actions. Somebody else is responsible for the state I'm in. And that is a mind virus that has taken over Los Angeles, taken over California, in my opinion. A lot of this is just mindset.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

6382.395

And I think it's very ironic, with all due respect, because I have a lot of friends who lost houses in the Palisades area and everything else. But... And I... If you had walked through the Palisades, you would have seen a lot—most of them voted for Karen Bass. I'm not saying Karen Bass deserves all this blame, but I'm saying there was a lot of Kamala stuff there, very little Trump stuff.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

6404.154

And it's ironic to me because I do think, to an extent, without having done enough research—but I've done some— that you have to lay at least some of the blame for this total inability to respond to government mismanagement.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

6419.128

And the fact that this government, this progressive government in California, in Sacramento, in Los Angeles, put things like climate change and social justice ahead of fucking basic infrastructure. Basic infrastructure. You knew that they were predicting and they knew how dry this season was. Fucking eight months without rain. Okay, guys?

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

6442.203

So we need to figure out there is a way to solve every problem. Do you need an army of firefighters? They cut 17%. I know.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

6448.125

$17.6 million from the fire budget in Los Angeles.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

6492.345

Well, to your point, this was a perfect storm to an extent, and there's a limit to what any fire department can do. There's a limit, right? We live in Los Angeles. Fires are a reality. Earthquakes are a reality. Mudslides are a reality. We know this. California is a tough place to live. It's great, but there are a lot of liabilities.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

6508.414

I just think if you know that that's the case, something went wrong. And our infrastructure, the fact that our fire hydrants and it happened in Colorado three years ago. But the fact that the fire hydrants lost pressure, you can predict these things.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

6534.872

I love the Delta smelt.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

656.511

Yeah.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

6569.386

The homeless thing, too. You talk to progressives about the homeless thing. You know what they'll say? It's a housing shortage. No, it's not. It's a drug and mental health problem. Housing, housing, housing. Sorry.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

6595.603

And so there's a vested interest in keeping homeless a problem.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

6627.978

I know a guy who was a tier one guy who was dealing with real demons and he did one session of Ibogaine and it changed everything.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

6642.785

And that's surprising that Rick Perry, who's a Texas conservative.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

6655.514

Repairs the neural pathways or something like that?

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

6713.147

Well, they did a really interesting study on, or there was a guy, a journalist, I can't remember who it was talking about. They drew this comparison when the 60s music movement happened with Hendrix and all those guys. When they were taking psychedelics, incredible things were going on musically. Oh, yeah. Once they turned to cocaine and heroin, the music fucking died. Hairbands.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

6813.281

Whiplash, fucking engine closing.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

6824.726

Is that a catalytic converter or a carburetor?

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

6833.689

It gets like a... Fuck a gallon.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

6864.806

That's sacrilege, I guess.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

6869.228

I like the old Aston Martins.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

6890.941

I drove a 1985 Porsche Targa. Dude, it's a stick shift. Oh, yeah. What a beautiful car. You feel everything, but God damn, it's beautiful. I mean, you're just zipping it.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

6907.233

That's the only time I've driven a car and I went, I get it. I've never been into cars.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

6912.297

I drive a Tesla 3 with white interior, white exterior. I wanted to be as gay as I could.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

6938.754

Damn.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

6945.598

I drove the new electric Porsche.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

6957.565

Yeah, that's 100 miles.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

6990.703

What can I pick one of those up for like a regular car? A regular one?

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

6996.348

There's a company called- Not electric.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

70.569

And I go – we had an evacuation order that they sent out by accident to people even down where I'm at. Yeah, what was that? It was some guy who –

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

7054.697

So you're not picking that thing up from this thing?

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

7071.144

Fuck, it's brand new.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

7081.612

Okay.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

7112.654

Because there's just very few of them.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

7121.84

That's why I like my car so much. I like the Tesla. It's... I love it.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

7133.787

That thing is a- That's like grinding your own coffee. It's something about it.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

7138.209

The sensations. There's a tactile sensation.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

7145.453

I think there's a huge value to that, like cooking. Oh, yeah. The fact that it takes- You take time to get good at something like cooking the perfect beef stew or whatever the fuck it is.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

7163.279

The smell of wood. Oh, yeah.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

7166.339

Convenience and abundance comes with a price like everything else. Sometimes that's a lack of connection. Sometimes just the actual process of doing shit, like the actual process of preparation and all that is a form of flow.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

7180.422

that you get into there's a great book called Beyond Boredom and Anxiety by Csikszentmihalyi I don't know what the fuck his name is he's like this Hungarian scientist he compares the flow state that rock climbers surgeons painters and conductors get into and it's all very similar because it takes incredible concentration when you're rock climbing and you don't want to fall I bet the rock climbers look at the painters like bitch you are not in the same flow state as me motherfucker no they're not because it's life and death right

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

7218.954

My Lord.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

7240.287

They don't drive it.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

7281.308

From the gas fuse.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

7283.47

And it had no top. Dude, I thought I was going to pass out. I was like, I went to the mechanic. I think I'm going to pass out. I was all panicked. You know, he goes, it's just the way it is. I go, what do you mean it's the way it is?

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

7293.82

Fucking sold that thing for 500 bucks or something. I don't know.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

7352.986

Well, you know what it is? They have a personality. There's something about getting into... I had a girlfriend who had a vintage Mercedes, and I swear to God, I got attached to that car. It felt like an experience. I would get in there, and it had a personality almost. It was like... 100%.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

7370.398

Because somebody had made that. Somebody had taken the time. A lot of that shit's made by hand, I think. Right.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

7381.026

Like when something's really considered by craftsmen and you can't, you cannot replace the feel of like something that's been crafted out of leather.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

7395.739

It's an artistic, it's an expression of artistry, man.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

7400.343

Yeah.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

7402.265

That's European, brother.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

7412.749

You know how much my three weighs? Almost 6,000 pounds.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

7485.666

You used to like big trucks, too, though. You like the Denali's and stuff.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

749.582

There's nothing you can do.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

7520.233

That's the kind of car you take out on a countryside. Oh, yeah, man. And you wear a scarf.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

7525.798

Gloves, scarf, and you wear the glasses. I want to be European so badly sometimes. And your lady's doing this. You're going too fast. Yeah.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

7556.822

It looks like an Arachnid.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

7560.165

Yeah, but it's also ridiculous. I mean, does it come with a Batman suit?

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

7599.844

Because it's just reliability, everything, or what?

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

7648.154

Is that fin that was on there necessary?

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

7653.378

That looks great.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

7655.32

Because you want to look like an asshole.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

7668.65

I like that. That's a good look right there.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

7674.315

Does the fin come up or something?

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

7679.6

Yeah, I like that.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

7681.822

That's a good-looking car.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

7687.046

Or are they very expensive?

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

7708.844

Let's go, baby.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

7710.245

When you run away from looters. Once I start selling theater tickets.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

7720.591

I know. I got to do that. You've been telling me that a long time.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

7724.934

I hope it is. But I have my other kids, so I have two families.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

7735.76

Plus, when you're on the road like me, traveling from Texas is way easier than traveling from fucking Los Angeles.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

775.704

You know, I got to tell you, the crazy thing about the Pacific Palisades was that eight years ago, probably eight, maybe almost nine years ago, I looked at houses there with my ex-wife. And we came so close to buying a house because it's such a beautiful place. We didn't buy it because it was a little too expensive, to be honest with you. It was just a little out of our price point.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

7766.591

Really?

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

7769.393

You want to talk about one of the greatest comics, period? I watched that motherfucker and I'm like, and he's still doing it at his age.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

7780.18

Unbelievable.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

7810.149

Yeah. Well, these fires, I feel like these fires are kind of almost like my wake-up call.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

7820.908

You're going to have one too, huh?

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

7824.389

We're smoking cigars like men. I like this new thing.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

7850.06

I'm an idiot. I'm like... I can't figure shit out. How come you can't figure things out? Because I'm bad with that stuff, okay? That's why my wife was like, get out of here. You can't do it. I'll take care of it. I'm like, raise my kids. Save them. Tell my story. I'll be in Austin. Sorry about the fires. Tell them to watch your special. Tell all the kids at school to watch Daddy Special.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

7871.811

Watch Daddy Special. It's going to be good. False gods. I'm excited, man.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

7877.854

Yeah, I think so, right?

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

7891.123

I was like, I would rather, like, shoot it here, you know? Mm-hmm. Because you did that club right, man. You did that club right. It makes such a difference. Yeah. Well.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

7930.813

It's a lot, right?

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

7942.719

That's it. I get a kick out of you because I don't know. You still have, like, for this podcast, what, three people that work for you? I mean four, but, you know, more than that.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

7957.33

Yeah.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

7958.311

My buddies, they're going to start a podcast. Well, we've got to get a production team. We've got to get this and that. I'm like, hey, bro.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

7976.97

You're fun to hang with. He's like a stoic.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

798.177

But even for a smaller house, it was expensive, right? But it's beautiful.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

80.314

fucked up because i don't know if you know this is gonna be this is gonna be shocking grab the table la's not run very well hold on i know hold on what the fuck you're saying because see here's the thing we have to worry about i know isn't the chief of fire department a lesbian now hold on let's not turn this into listen here's the bottom it's run amazing it's not about infrastructure infrastructure i won't sit here while you disparage the great people sir that are running los angeles sir infrastructure's got to take a backseat to climate change and social justice and homeless abatement which hasn't

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

8010.634

And he's not trying to be – Anything he's not. So what happens in that position is that's kind of a big job. Right. And it'd be very easy to go, I'm part of this podcast. I'm a huge part of it. He doesn't get his ego.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

803.84

The last thing you would ever think, the last thing is...

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

8034.507

We all have our role. We all do our thing.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

8070.461

Just give me a paid intern. It's fine.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

8074.124

I think what happens is it builds resentment if you're not- 100%. You got to be careful with all that.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

808.083

that that house would burn down or there was a fire hazard especially down like where Gelson's was or the whole town that dude when I'm saying the town is gone you know the only structure that's standing is that guy Caruso that mayor the guy who ran for mayor narrowly lost to Karen Bass he built that mall out of fire retardant material and that's the only structures that pretty much downtown that are in the town of Pacific Palisades Frank Grillo our buddy his old house burned right to the ground just done

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

8100.124

Yeah.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

8102.345

Henry VIII said something like that. He said, every time I promote somebody, I create eight enemies and one ingrate. Something like that. I think that was the quote.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

8112.253

It's great.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

8114.916

He was terrible. Henry VIII was a fucking idiot. Maybe he's just a piece of shit. You know what he did, right? So the Catholic Church, he wanted a son, and his wife was barren, and he wanted an heir, and the Catholic Church would not... Codify his divorce. So he was like, okay, I'm gonna start the Anglican Church fuck off I'm gonna start my own church and it's gonna okay.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

8137.199

It's gonna be okay with divorce So he created the Anglican Church and the great story of a man for all seasons Thomas Sir Thomas more was Thomas more would not join the Anglican Church and they killed him for it And he said I am more than my appetites.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

8150.69

I am more than you know, my body I am my principles and my principles are higher and I'm gonna stick to the Catholic Church kind of like, you know I wish I was

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

8160.997

Well, we all would, right?

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

8165.399

All right? I was in acting class. As you remember that. And one of the... Kind of a famous actor. He did the scene. This is so great. He did the man for all seasons. And as he... So you do a scene. And a lot of working actors in the class. This is Los Angeles. And we all sit back. And now the great teacher will now break it apart. And he... The actor began to weep.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

8190.492

And they said, why are you crying? And he says, because I'm not this man. I would have joined the Anglican church. And it bothers me that I'm not the kind of principled man that would stick to.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

8204.426

He was one of my favorite actors, too. And I was like, there you go. At least you know your fucking limitations.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

8209.53

Never say what you would do in an emergency because you don't know.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

8221.759

Well, you better know you're vulnerable. Like, you walk around like a tough guy. Right. The real tough guys are the guys that have done a lot of shit or who've seen a lot of combat or at least been involved in, like, Evan Hafer, for example, has probably done a lot more than he... He never talks about any of it.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

8234.893

You'll never hear him say anything, but... And for that matter, Andy Stump's the same way. They don't really tell you anything, but... They're very aware that, first of all, it's very easy to be killed. Very easy. I don't care how strong you are, what you bench. A tiny child can kill you with a gun. Right away. So you get a real sense.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

8251.348

Part of what's really good about just doing combat sports or doing any kind of, like, even a rough sport, contact sport, is that you come into contact with objective reality. It's very hard to start living this fake existence. And part of the problem, I think, with our society is a lot of people controlling the narrative.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

8271.061

don't really pay a price for being wrong because they live a life and they live a job where they're working, where they're working with their mouth. They're working with only their brain. And I think you get a lot from actually trying to grow your own food or doing whatever it is.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

8284.97

You know, you've got to kind of come in, you own a farm and you realize that life eats life and things, everything of nature, mother nature is a motherfucker and wants to kill everything you try to grow. It gives you a very different perspective on reality and what the world is about.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

8322.216

Right. You ever see Steven Pinker's book, The Blank Slate? Those people have never been in contact with anybody white or Western, and the guys that get laid the most are the guys that kill the most people in combat and have their hair on their daggers. So they have their version of a fucking all-star quarterback, too, and he gets all the pussy. And they were like, what the fuck?

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

8358.945

And they literally attacked their reputations and everything. They drove them out of academia.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

838.504

Everybody's.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

8386.513

And life takes a certain amount of aggression and competitive spirit or you're going to fucking get eaten.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

8391.954

Yeah, you're going to get fucked is really what happens. That's right. For sure. So don't – it's great. I love that we're all – it's all utopian until your kids don't have enough to eat. And then I'm going to kill – that's what happens. People are really kumbaya until your kids – have to struggle for resources, and then they become genocidal.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

8411.103

Jared Diamond, who wrote Guns, Germs, and Steel, did the study with the fucking people up in the Guinea highlands. The minute they started running out of resources, they would start coming up with stories about the other tribe over there that were basically, yeah, they eat their own kids. Yeah, they're fucking really evil.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

843.925

Nobody in a million years. I'm telling you.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

8430.866

Just to whip up, just to justify what they were about to do to that other tribe because they got their stuff.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

8480.16

I think what changed me a lot was when I was younger, I was accidentally around some pretty rough people, some criminals, people that were –

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

8492.066

bad violent or you know um and i think i remember going i remember it's very scary when you're around people that are you know like that and i never forgot it because i was pretty naive as most of us are coming up because i'd been around a good family and stuff like that and i saw how ugly and dangerous Some men can be, especially when nobody's looking. And I never forgot the idea.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

8523.62

I mean, I lived in. Remember, also, I was in the war in Lebanon.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

8527.224

So I think you I was I left and I was I left Lebanon when I was. I was 11 years old.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

8541.159

Yeah, and then I went back. I went back when I was, I think, 15, 16, and I didn't recognize anything from my childhood. So I was in Lebanon for five years. And so I had wonderful memories. And then the war broke out and we were stuck. My father couldn't get back in because he was... And then we got evacuated. But I was living in the Holiday Inn for six months. And we had to sleep on the floor.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

8563.601

And then finally we had to go down into the fucking underground parking lot because they were bombing. And you would wake up and you would hear machine guns and stuff. So you felt very out of sorts and very, very... It was very scary. You're a kid. And I remember seeing – on a balcony, I remember seeing planes bomb a gas station. I never forgot it.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

858.288

I don't know. The wind blew a different direction or something.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

8582.215

I never forgot seeing the planes come in and the missiles dropped and just – the sound, dude, the sound. And I don't know if anybody who's been in war knows this, but I was on the beach. I was on Coral Beach. and it probably was in the 80s. I was 14, 15, 16, whatever I was. They shot a rocket over our head, okay? And I think it was a test fire.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

8607.124

Dude, when I tell you that the sound was so loud that we all fell on the ground. I fell down on the sand. The sound was so disoriented that everybody went down on their hands and knees. That's how loud it was over your head. And I think that when you are in that kind of proximity to...

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

8625.849

violence like that and then later on when I was older I was around some people who were pretty rough you know and for me I always I knew that if the grid broke down that those people were going to take over and there was going to be no fucking mercy and I've never forgot that and so you could see with COVID the minute That law enforcement had to restrict their resources. You saw what happened.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

864.711

No, I don't think any house withstands that kind of fire.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

8648.51

Looting. You saw crime. You saw homelessness. And the fabric of a society can break down so fucking quickly. People don't realize it. Until you've been in countries where it's happened. And until you've been around... Men who negotiate the world in a violent way and maybe in ways that are a little bit outside the law. You don't know what you're doing, man. You've got no idea. So all those people.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

8672.963

And I love when the left starts talking about. you know, violent revolution and you're in college kid, you have no fucking idea. You don't, first of all, don't wake up that and don't wake up the conservative. Don't do that.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

8685.972

Let's not even talk about it because I know a lot of guys that shoot real straight, you know, and often and yeah, and often and they're very comfortable and they're comfortable in those violent spaces.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

869.554

I am.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

8696.838

They're there. Yeah.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

8698.959

Yeah. Let's not, let's not, let's not let those dogs slip.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

8710.524

His body just comes from enforcement. His traps, he just looks like a giant block. He's a born enforcer. He's not going to win a Nobel Prize for peace.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

8720.309

You ever hear how Tim Kennedy talked about him?

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

8722.79

You put him in a glass case and break in case of war?

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

8726.411

Let's keep those guys on a – let's keep them over here on a leash.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

8733.214

Yes. And please understand the base of our republic also is that we have civilian control of a military. And that was a huge – in the election between I think Madison and Jefferson, the idea was – was it Madison or was it – Adams, I can't remember. But in the election was, should we have a standing army?

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

8753.926

Because traditionally in a republic, if you had a standing army, a very charismatic general like Napoleon would take over the army and take over the country. So that was a huge thing. James Madison was a genius at figuring out how to limit that. And he said, checks and balances, but you have to have civilian government in control of the military because military people arrive at military solutions.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

877.858

It doesn't matter. How's that one house?

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

8772.18

Yeah. Fucking really important, man. Really important. Don't let guys like John McPhee, you need him in war, but God bless.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

8786.27

Man, I really enjoyed having him on.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

8792.294

Well, yeah.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

8794.216

He used the word viceroy, and he did it on purpose. It's like- But Eric comes from a position of how to solve problems. Yeah. When he was talking about Gaza, he said, we have the ability to frack. What that means is we can drill sideways. He said, you could have filled those tunnels with seawater instead of bombing the shit out of 70% of it and killing all those people.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

8817.683

You could have flooded those fuckers out. Because you drill... And I don't know if this is true. I don't know anything about fracking. But he does. And he said, you could have drilled fucking... this way, take the Mediterranean, fill all those tunnels with seawater, and they would have had to come up, and you would have been just fine, and just position people when they come out of the water.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

8839.498

Why didn't they choose that? A good question. The same reason that in Afghanistan, they had an oil reserve there in Afghanistan that was well-capped by the Soviets. Well-capped. We could have taken that cap off, and that oil, they had enough oil to not only fuel the entire country, but the whole war effort right there for about nine cents a gallon.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

884.061

No, that's wind. Look at that, though.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

8861.613

But instead, we would get our oil from Saudi Arabia, et cetera, and have to ship it through Pakistan with all the roadblocks. It was about 900 bucks a gallon or some crazy shit. He was on my thing talking about it.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

8911.363

Yeah, he's very smart. And Eric is, he's a problem solver. You can say whatever you want about him, but I really enjoy, he's a very smart guy. And I know people that work with him and for him.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

8944.842

Just so you can outrage me and give me more energy.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

896.388

But here's my other thing. Here's the question I have. Okay, so you see that, right? Now- Who is going to rebuild there and who's going to finance it? And then what kind of insurance are you going to be able to get? So are you going to get insurance? Is a bank going to finance that? Would you want to rebuild there when you have to wait for a gas station for a grocery store? There's nothing there.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

8972.163

This AI shit's getting crazy.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

9008.721

Oh, wow. Oh, that's helpful.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

9025.912

Only if you want to save lives. Yeah. But again, this is social justice. Social justice. No, they care about representation. Ideology over effectiveness. Ideology over utility.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

9048.291

There's a limit to what you can do. People, you know, they're not stupid. Americans, they reach their boring point.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

9088.598

Make everybody rise to the same level.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

9102.943

Exactly.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

9107.324

Well, that's because they, again, they're framing the problem wrong. If you talk to those people, you talk to the people in charge of homelessness. A lot of times, I'm not saying a lot of them are, look, a lot of them are good people and a lot of them are smart and they know a lot more about it than I do.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

9120.355

So I don't like being the guy who's talking about like, but I'm just saying I like to be fair. I want to be fair. But I think when you're framing it just as a housing problem and an inequality problem, it's a fucking,

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

9156.62

And, you know, California was always, including under Democratic governors, California was always known as a place that was run very, very well with really responsible civic employees for a long time under Reardon and that and stuff.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

917.221

Right. So to me, I don't know what happens to that very valuable property.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

9174.563

So I had... I was with Arnold Schwarzenegger and I asked him, what was it like to be governor? And one of the things I got was that how little power he, he was not able to get a lot of things done, but I'll give you a classic example. He said, and I'm sorry if I'm paraphrasing, but he said something, he said, there was a water issue.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

9190.972

And he said, these farmers over here are not using all that water. So here's ready. Here's what you do. Just take the water they're not using and give it to this, this part of the state over here. Let's not be able to just pipe it over here. And his senators said, Mr. Governor, you can't do that. He said, why?

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

9209.403

He goes, because now you're asking me to go and ask my constituents to give up some of their water. They're going to use that against me in my next election. So Schwarzenegger goes, so then what the fuck are we going to do? And he goes, here's what you're going to do. You're going to make a speech and you're going to say exactly what you just said to us.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

9228.495

And we're going to say yes, but then we're not going to really let it happen. Right. And he goes, that's how this works. He goes, how you're learning, baby. That's fucking California state politics.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

9248.385

Let me give you an example. So- Pete Hegseth seems like a great guy. I'm a fan. I don't know much about him, but he seems like the kind of guy I'd like to hang out and have a beer with. I'm sure he's very smart. Princeton, I think. Harvard. Bronze star. Wrote four books. Awesome. I'm sure he'll be a very effective Secretary of Defense.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

9267.889

However, that job, this DOD, I think has a million point one employees and a budget of $750 billion, maybe $850 billion. Now, just that is a massive, massive company, essentially. And that requires management on a different level. That skill set is very specific and very, very difficult and very strange. It doesn't mean that because you are a great soldier, you can necessarily do that.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

9298.794

And I'm saying I'm not I'm just using it as an example. So we have to get down to brass tacks and take politics out of this and get real fucking practical with all this stuff. I think with Elon Musk and with Vivek Ramaswamy, the US government is a very complicated organism and massive and does a lot of shit none of us even know about. You know, I always use this as an example.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

9318.854

Who the fuck keeps geese out of the airfields? The Department of Agriculture. Who keeps falcons on hand at most airports? Peregrine falcons. You know who does? The Department of Agriculture. You know why? Because they're territorial birds. They keep all the other birds out of the airfield. You know how to do that? Because I don't.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

9337.257

Who gets sheep to graze at a higher altitude because of global warming and they don't want to graze when it's really hot? I don't know, but we have to do that if you want mutton and fucking wool. And there are scientists that have to figure that out. They're not political. There's a thousand things.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

9350.126

Who manages all that nuclear waste in the ground and makes sure it doesn't get into the Columbia River and the waterways? Who manages our electric grid? Who keeps track, please, I'd like to know, of all these spent uranium rods, sir, that are used in all our diagnostic machines? Because if you detonate one of those motherfuckers over the Super Bowl, you have to clear out that city for 20 years.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

9372.233

The Department of Energy is the answer. That's Buttigieg. He's doing a great job.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

9383.881

Yeah, he's the nuclear secretary.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

9386.623

That guy seems like fucking well put together.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

9401.354

And so Michael Lewis wrote a book called The Fifth Risk about this. A good book. Short. Very worth reading. Very fucking worth reading. I walk around talking about being a libertarian. As usual, I don't really know what government does. I was so kind of humbled by the book because I was like, there's a lot of shit I rely on.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

9417.396

People who are needy, people who are very elderly, people who are disabled, who live in places where they can't get food, our food banks feed those people. Meals on Wheels is a really big thing. So there's a lot of shit that the government does, and we feed a lot of people that couldn't feed themselves otherwise. So we have to be careful about not throwing the baby out with the bathwater.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

943.598

I think they should be put to death.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

9435.178

And once again, take politics out of it. Let's approach everything like it's a problem and stay agnostic about this shit. And sometimes you might have to be a little left. Sometimes you might have to be a little right. Respond to the fucking evidence and be humble about the fact that every time you step into a problem, you may not know anything. And that's what I try to do.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

9455.089

Fucking, why didn't you write, I hope you guys wrote that shit down. Where's my camera? You don't need to write it down, bro. You just said it from the heart. Fuck yeah, dude. Yeah, bro. Fucking hilarious. Yeah, why don't you be a governor? My buddy, my buddy, last time I did my podcast, my buddy AG goes like this. He goes, from Toe Hold, he goes, hey dude, loved your Rogan podcast.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

9471.006

Next time you're on the biggest podcast in the world, make sure you talk about the fucking Bible some more.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

9502.242

Yeah.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

9503.804

It's not only incredible, but I always think the fact that the Bible endures is interesting.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

9516.655

I have an opinion. Tell me. I think that if you read the Old Testament, which I've done three times, I would argue that—so what's a theme of a—any author writes a book, the theme is always the author's argument for how one should behave in the world, okay? It's a good way of looking at it. And I think that the central theme of the Bible, of the Old Testament, certainly is don't worship false gods.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

9544.891

So what's that mean? If you try to worship false gods, if you put too much emphasis on money, on status, on power, whatever it is, on ideology, you will inevitably turn yourself into a circle. You'll be a snake eating its own tail. For whatever reason, human beings have a very hard time inventing and creating their own gods. And we always do it. The value of having a transcendent truth

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

9573.744

of something that you can't measure. It's very interesting that you can't measure it. So why do the Muslims, why do the Orthodox Jews not have any kind of picture of God? It's because you're putting a measurement around God. You're trying to define God, and that's not for you to do.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

9588.639

And there's something very valuable about not being able to do that because that transcendent truth is not for you to understand necessarily. It is for you to reach for. It is for you to be reverent of. It's for you to understand that something is watching you, that you will never get away with anything. And I'll quote Jordan Peterson. I love it because I've always thought this.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

9606.39

I think you agree with this. You don't get away with anything. You'll pay in full for everything you've done and haven't done. It's a great way of looking at things. Maybe it's wrong, but it's a good way to at least keep that in mind.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

965.798

This kind of tragedy brings out the best in people and the worst in people. The one thing it does in these communities, it brings all these people together. My buddy started to cry because I was on the phone with him. He lost everything, right? And they're going to come stay with us. And he said, when I was on the phone, these people dropped by and dropped off clothes for them.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

9652.205

Well, also, like I always people talk about God. I kind of like replacing it with truth. So just just try to stay close to the truth, man. And it's hard. Sometimes the truth is really fucking inconvenient. It's really it's really it'll it might throw your whole life up in the air. You might have to burn off, you know, but I don't think, I think it's inevitable.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

9671.159

And part of like, if you see great stories, you know, what's the definition of a tragedy? It's the hero or the protagonist doesn't learn from his mistakes and holds on. Moby Dick is a tragedy because Ahab will not give up on this fucking white whale that took his leg. And if you read the book, he just gets sucked in. You'd think it'd be some dramatic thing. In the book, Ahab gets caught

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

9695.313

by the whale, and he just dies this quick. It's just soundless. He just gets sucked in. Like, wait, dude, he's been in the book the whole time. What the fuck happened? That's how it happens, bro. You got sucked down, and the universe doesn't give a fuck. You're not important.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

9709.464

But you spent all that time trying to get vengeance on a white whale, and that thing was like, he was just trying to run away. You get sucked in and you drown. It's a great way of looking at life. And as I get older, the one thing I would have told myself when I was younger, the one thing I would have told myself is I would have said, hey, listen, listen, fuckface.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

9728.099

You better tell the truth all the way across the board, all the way across.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

9737.859

You're so fucking right. Because you know what I always said to myself? I'm one of God's favorites. These things don't apply to me. I'm Peter Pan.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

9748.328

Got away with a lot.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

9755.795

Found my way through.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

9768.463

Yeah, I didn't want to be too... The people I knew who got real famous actors, they were so buttoned down. They were so fucking afraid of everything. And I was like, hey, bro, I think sometimes you got to be willing to throw the whole fucking chessboard in the air.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

9783.05

Yeah.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

985.209

And he's got a lot of money. And he started to cry, man. He was like, I can't tell you how many people have reached out.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

9854.526

Kill somebody like that.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

9885.269

It feels like nothing on your foot. Well, it hurt.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

9900.054

Yeah, still are.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

9919.304

Yeah, because that could have been you.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

9947.822

that's why I think fighters who can, who have longevity are very special because one of the things, you know, if you like just box or Taekwondo, especially people don't realize that people get, would get knocked out all the time in our studio, but, but also boxing. Like when you get hit hard and you have trouble chewing for like two weeks or you get hit, like, like when I was sparring a lot,

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

995.319

I'm skeptical. Of course you are. Is this conspiracy?

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

9968.802

I would get hit, man, and I would get fucking gun shy. And my trainer, Wayne McCulloch, would go, you're sparring today. And it was everything I could do not to turn my car around. It would almost turn me into a liar. I was like, I'm in the hospital. Oh, my car just got hit by a truck. Anything.

The Joe Rogan Experience

#2257 - Bryan Callen

9986.063

But you'd get there and you'd have your fucking, I would wear a bar because I'm a bitch and a mouthpiece. And I was still always nervous. And I was fighting good guys, fighting guys like me, fucking weekend warriors.

The Joe Rogan Experience

Fight Companion - October 26, 2024

6565.831

That's good. He's great. Jamie, find him. That's good. I'll wait till Jamie gets back. You like this, you old fuck? That's pretty good. There's one with him with the schmo. Yeah, he can fucking freestyle. Dude. Okay, who won this fight? Uncle Ive? I'm going to go with the beard guy. 100% Uncle Ive.

The Joe Rogan Experience

Fight Companion - February 8, 2025

10595.731

Great conditioning. Look at that. Son of a gun strikes 28 to 17. Wow. He's just more active. More active. So Strickland's down two rounds now.

The Joe Rogan Experience

Fight Companion - February 8, 2025

10818.216

It's just not his style.

The Joe Rogan Experience

Fight Companion - February 8, 2025

11867.626

Classy.

The Joe Rogan Experience

Fight Companion - February 8, 2025

12131.344

See, I would give DDP the advantage over Hamza right now. That's a bet on it.

The Joe Rogan Experience

Fight Companion - February 8, 2025

12143.901

He didn't do that to Kamaru Usman. He didn't do it to Gilbert Burns. We go on the third, fourth, and fifth.

The Joe Rogan Experience

Fight Companion - February 8, 2025

12191.105

But again, he gassed out against Usman. That was at 85.

The Joe Rogan Experience

Fight Companion - February 8, 2025

12437.214

Man, what are you doing? Good 85. You're flipping around.

The Joe Rogan Experience

Fight Companion - February 8, 2025

12440.176

Got a big head.

The Joe Rogan Experience

Fight Companion - February 8, 2025

1260.986

If someone goes, how's Brian Callen? Nah. I listen.

The Joe Rogan Experience

Fight Companion - February 8, 2025

12914.117

Now Mikey signed with the UFC, right?

The Joe Rogan Experience

Fight Companion - February 8, 2025

12916.239

Not for fighting.

The Joe Rogan Experience

Fight Companion - February 8, 2025

1309.01

You know who seems to be doing good is Frank Trigg. You see him as a ref out there? Yeah, that's what you want looking nice and fat.

The Joe Rogan Experience

Fight Companion - February 8, 2025

1499.946

Yeah, it's probably the beginning. But that's like a tribal thing, right? That's like a New Zealand tattoo.

The Joe Rogan Experience

Fight Companion - February 8, 2025

157.671

They're also both older. I think Tatiana's 31, and then the homegirl, Whaley, is what, 34?

The Joe Rogan Experience

Fight Companion - February 8, 2025

1607.253

I agree. I agree. Facts.

The Joe Rogan Experience

Fight Companion - February 8, 2025

1612.254

I was like, this is ridiculous. I'm like, you gay? Wait, does she have a fake ass or no?

The Joe Rogan Experience

Fight Companion - February 8, 2025

1697.913

I went like this. Yes. What does he hunt? And then my favorite goes, I bow hunt.

The Joe Rogan Experience

Fight Companion - February 8, 2025

1708.195

Because I saw Joe go, I saw Joe go, do you?

The Joe Rogan Experience

Fight Companion - February 8, 2025

1726.989

Yeah, because you shoot bows and arrows.

The Joe Rogan Experience

Fight Companion - February 8, 2025

1733.273

That's like saying I play laser tag.

The Joe Rogan Experience

Fight Companion - February 8, 2025

175.073

Lighter weight class female, like older, they turn into fucking gremlins. How about fucking Pantoja?

The Joe Rogan Experience

Fight Companion - February 8, 2025

1758.835

If you're going to talk bows with Joe or pool or even cars, you better come correct.

The Joe Rogan Experience

Fight Companion - February 8, 2025

257.157

But the narrative on that too, like the media is like, you know, he's a UFC fighter and he's driving for Uber Eats. It's like he also fought once in three years. Like that's on you, Doug.

The Joe Rogan Experience

Fight Companion - February 8, 2025

2881.938

It is hard to explain. It's very complicated. What's it on?

The Joe Rogan Experience

Fight Companion - February 8, 2025

2982.439

I can't get into it.

The Joe Rogan Experience

Fight Companion - February 8, 2025

3013.315

Like a bad kid. What? What did I do? Look at Izzy right there. Joe, I thought you were going to say he went out and got knocked out or something.

The Joe Rogan Experience

Fight Companion - February 8, 2025

304.468

But he wasn't controversial.

The Joe Rogan Experience

Fight Companion - February 8, 2025

306.089

Mighty Mouse was like the nicest guy ever. Bro, that Ray Borg fight? Dude, I was about to say that.

The Joe Rogan Experience

Fight Companion - February 8, 2025

346.018

They're both from the Caucus Mountains. They are. Yeah, but one guy trains in Jersey. What are we doing here? And also, Murab. He's living in Vegas now.

The Joe Rogan Experience

Fight Companion - February 8, 2025

3657.67

Yeah, anaconda.

The Joe Rogan Experience

Fight Companion - February 8, 2025

3660.392

All right. All right. The kid's aware. He's aware.

The Joe Rogan Experience

Fight Companion - February 8, 2025

3666.375

Rape joke. Let's go. Do they still call it the rape joke?

The Joe Rogan Experience

Fight Companion - February 8, 2025

3694.9

So if we're not calling it the rape truck, what should we refer to it as? I don't know. What did they tell you to call it, Joe?

The Joe Rogan Experience

Fight Companion - February 8, 2025

3919.497

But they also shouldn't be ringside. Sure they should.

The Joe Rogan Experience

Fight Companion - February 8, 2025

3924.559

Yeah, but they can get swayed by the crowd. No. They should be in a disclosed area.

The Joe Rogan Experience

Fight Companion - February 8, 2025

3974.739

That's rare. Because a lot of times when it's so atrocious, dude, you're talking about that dude gets half his fucking pay, you idiots. I know.

The Joe Rogan Experience

Fight Companion - February 8, 2025

4021.031

And did they go to any of your fights? No. I was going to say, they think the mom's the fighter. Little do they know the dad. No, it's funny.

The Joe Rogan Experience

Fight Companion - February 8, 2025

4082.354

Did you get kicked in the thigh, though? Not a ton, right?

The Joe Rogan Experience

Fight Companion - February 8, 2025

4498.667

I can't believe this guy's still even in the fight, though. It's a good fight.

The Joe Rogan Experience

Fight Companion - February 8, 2025

4808.635

How many fucking 30 takedowns? Shot 30 takedowns? Animal. You do 30 takedowns in this fucking studio, you're a fucking dog. It's one of my favorite moments ever in the corner.

The Joe Rogan Experience

Fight Companion - February 8, 2025

4820.083

Everything.

The Joe Rogan Experience

Fight Companion - February 8, 2025

4879.223

But he's 7-0, undefeated prospect.

The Joe Rogan Experience

Fight Companion - February 8, 2025

5037.658

You know what I love about it? Longo picked Wyman second. Wyman goes, what the fuck? Who did he pick first?

The Joe Rogan Experience

Fight Companion - February 8, 2025

5053.484

They're on the same team, bud. Oh, my goodness. The Miami roster. I don't know how they get this fucking cash.

The Joe Rogan Experience

Fight Companion - February 8, 2025

511.161

It reminds me of Kane. Remember Kane had that weird cardio? Oh, yeah.

The Joe Rogan Experience

Fight Companion - February 8, 2025

517.81

They said he took two months off in his heyday.

The Joe Rogan Experience

Fight Companion - February 8, 2025

5499.964

Thank you.

The Joe Rogan Experience

Fight Companion - February 8, 2025

5601.294

Thank you.

The Joe Rogan Experience

Fight Companion - February 8, 2025

5824.09

a in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in in and. P P P P P P P P P P P P P P P P P P P P P P P P P P P P P P P P P P P P P P P P P P P P���த gi gற gi gற già gà gà gà gà gà gà gà grà gà grà grà grà grà grà grà grà grà grà grà grà grà grà grà grà grà grà grà grà grà grà

The Joe Rogan Experience

Fight Companion - February 8, 2025

5967.128

James Gunn. Did they try canceling James Gunn for being mean on set?

The Joe Rogan Experience

Fight Companion - February 8, 2025

6053.355

Do you think the studios tell Mark Ruffalo, like, shut the fuck up, dude.

The Joe Rogan Experience

Fight Companion - February 8, 2025

6209.244

No, he wants to go up to 205 and fight Yuri.

The Joe Rogan Experience

Fight Companion - February 8, 2025

6217.557

You don't want to fight the big boys. Yuri's a thin 205-er.

The Joe Rogan Experience

Fight Companion - February 8, 2025

6326.015

See, I feel like MVP doesn't have that.

The Joe Rogan Experience

Fight Companion - February 8, 2025

6365.842

They lost a wrestler.

The Joe Rogan Experience

Fight Companion - February 8, 2025

6425.375

It's like being CFL world champion.

The Joe Rogan Experience

Fight Companion - February 8, 2025

6495.319

There's so many question marks that we don't know how good John is.

The Joe Rogan Experience

Fight Companion - February 8, 2025

6527.591

So what does that mean?

The Joe Rogan Experience

Fight Companion - February 8, 2025

6530.334

He's got to be able to.

The Joe Rogan Experience

Fight Companion - February 8, 2025

6531.855

Like the bulldog guillotine is like, hey, dude. At this level?

The Joe Rogan Experience

Fight Companion - February 8, 2025

6586.6

A lot of big guys don't have a guard. He's been doing jiu-jitsu in his diapers, man. You're talking about, there's pictures of him at four years old.

The Joe Rogan Experience

Fight Companion - February 8, 2025

6595.528

I agree, but as athletic as he is and growing up in that culture, the guard's not going to be shit.

The Joe Rogan Experience

Fight Companion - February 8, 2025

6706.228

Look at her.

The Joe Rogan Experience

Fight Companion - February 8, 2025

6709.111

Whaley probably has a little advantage on the feet, but... A lot more championship experience.

The Joe Rogan Experience

Fight Companion - February 8, 2025

6741.958

I almost dropped. Oh, my goodness. I almost called you a maggot. Oh, my goodness.

The Joe Rogan Experience

Fight Companion - February 8, 2025

6860.135

In that aisle of wrestling, she took it down in 40 seconds.

The Joe Rogan Experience

Fight Companion - February 8, 2025

7011.202

I don't think she's going to need to. That takedown's too easy. She's going to finish her.

The Joe Rogan Experience

Fight Companion - February 8, 2025

714.462

Doesn't have an incline machine like Brandon Callum.

The Joe Rogan Experience

Fight Companion - February 8, 2025

7205.507

Her hands are closed. She didn't take it down again, but she'll step over. He's got to get it with the control.

The Joe Rogan Experience

Fight Companion - February 8, 2025

736.543

I was on the same card. I fought Gonzaga. Yeah, that was the fight he fought Lesnar. And when we were doing the fucking pre-shoot stuff, he took his shirt off and I'm like waiting to go.

The Joe Rogan Experience

Fight Companion - February 8, 2025

7488.574

No, we have.

The Joe Rogan Experience

Fight Companion - February 8, 2025

751.337

And he goes, dude, just shut the fuck up.

The Joe Rogan Experience

Fight Companion - February 8, 2025

7560.108

She does the same takedown over and over.

The Joe Rogan Experience

Fight Companion - February 8, 2025

7598.452

Guys, guys, guys, I'm a fan of her. I would beat the shit out of her. Yeah, but you're 280 pounds.

The Joe Rogan Experience

Fight Companion - February 8, 2025

807.077

Because he kind of does a character, you know, and he's doing his thing. But Theo's so fucking funny, he breaks like three times. He just can't. He just can't.

The Joe Rogan Experience

Fight Companion - February 8, 2025

815.562

Because Theo's talking about black ducks. He goes, you need to get you some black ducks. Dude, it's so funny.

The Joe Rogan Experience

Fight Companion - February 8, 2025

821.206

He's the best. He broke Kat like four times.

The Joe Rogan Experience

Fight Companion - February 8, 2025

8810.759

He's fucking amazing.

The Joe Rogan Experience

Fight Companion - February 8, 2025

9002.587

Contractor's Showdown?

The Joe Rogan Experience

Fight Companion - February 8, 2025

901.539

It's like 35 hours. It's smart. You guys should do it. That's what athletes do.

The Joe Rogan Experience

Fight Companion - February 8, 2025

9053.611

That's fucking great. How do you have time to do this, man? With all your jujitsu.

The Joe Rogan Experience

Fight Companion - February 8, 2025

9058.074

You make the time.

The Joe Rogan Experience

Fight Companion - February 8, 2025

9162.958

Well, there's a kid who does the simulation. They made a movie out of it. He played Gran Turismo. Then he actually raced for Nismo. Yeah. That's funny. And came in third.

The Joe Rogan Experience

Fight Companion - February 8, 2025

9244.549

Yeah, you're going to fall. He walks weird, too.

The Joe Rogan Experience

Fight Companion - February 8, 2025

9358.834

I think DDP is.

The Joe Rogan Experience

Fight Companion - February 8, 2025

941.087

Jake Matthews is always exciting.

The Joe Rogan Experience

Fight Companion - February 8, 2025

947.97

But he's a little reckless, so he'll win like three and then lose one.

The Joe Rogan Experience

Fight Companion - February 8, 2025

9793.568

Greatest defensive fighter we've seen. Just one left hook. Starched him. Starched him.

The Joe Rogan Experience

Fight Companion - February 8, 2025

9813.062

Oh, his legacy is— I think with Alex, there's a difference between MMA striking, like the elite strikers, and then actual elite strikers.