The Mel Robbins Podcast
6 Sneaky Ways People Are Disrespecting You & What to Do About It
Mon, 17 Mar 2025
Have you ever walked away from a conversation feeling dismissed, overlooked, or drained — but you couldn't quite put your finger on why? You're not imagining it. Disrespect is everywhere, and often, it’s so subtle that you don’t realize it’s happening until it’s already taken a toll on your confidence, energy, and peace of mind.In today’s episode, Mel breaks down 6 sneaky ways people are disrespecting you every day — at work, in relationships, even within your own family — and, more importantly, exactly what to do about it. Whether it’s someone constantly talking over you, dismissing your feelings, or always running late (yep, that’s disrespectful, too), you’ll learn how to respond in a way that protects your energy and commands the respect you deserve.If you’re tired of feeling unseen, unheard, or undervalued, this is the episode for you. For more resources, click here for the podcast episode page. If you enjoyed this eye-opening episode, listen to this one next: How To Handle Difficult People & Take Back Your Peace and Power.Connect with Mel: Get Mel’s #1 bestselling book, The Let Them TheoryWatch the episodes on YouTubeFollow Mel on Instagram The Mel Robbins Podcast InstagramMel's TikTok Sign up for Mel’s personal letter Subscribe to SiriusXM Podcasts+ to listen to new episodes ad-freeDisclaimer
Chapter 1: What are the six subtle ways people disrespect you?
Hey, it's your friend Mel, and welcome to the Mel Robbins Podcast. You know, today I wanted to talk to you about six subtle ways that you're being disrespected right now. And this is such an important topic because I'm sure you felt it. there's tension in the air, right? Everywhere you go.
I don't know if it's the headlines or the fact that everybody is so stressed out or the news is so negative, but the impatience of people when they're waiting in lines, the folks that you see like getting frustrated with waiters and folks working in customer service or the nurse trying to take care of a family member, it's like this negativity is vibrating everywhere.
And I want you to know you're not crazy. The disrespect that you're starting to feel, the immaturity that you're encountering, it is higher than it's been in the past couple months. It does seem like gossip is ticking up. People are talking over you at work and at the dinner table. And the reason is simple. People are less patient. They're stressed out. They're angrier. They're overwhelmed.
And stress seems to be the baseline now for all communication. Do you know what that means? It means that people's fight or flight responses are revved up. And that's why it seems like everybody's on edge. And I'm not trying to blame stress or excuse away bad behavior. In fact, I wanna do the opposite today.
I wanna validate what you're feeling and I wanna empower you by highlighting six subtle ways that you're being disrespected at work, at home, in your relationship.
And more importantly, we're not only gonna highlight these six subtle ways, I'm gonna give you the research pack methods and tools to call it out, to diffuse it, to protect your time, to protect your energy, because while you may be feeling it, you don't have to live like this because yeah, people's fuses are short right now.
And it does feel like the world is at a simmer and it's ready to boil and everybody is stressed out. But here's what I want you to know. You don't have to go through your day-to-day life feeling like you're being disrespected because the way people treat you, that's a reflection of them. But what you allow, that's on you.
And today, you're going to learn these six subtle ways that people are disrespecting you, and more importantly, exactly what to do about it. Hey, it's your friend Mel, and welcome to the Mel Robbins Podcast. First of all, I am so excited you're here. I am fired up about what we're gonna talk about today. It's always such an honor to spend time with you and to be together.
And if you're a new listener, I wanna take a moment and personally welcome you to the Mel Robbins Podcast family. So glad you're here. And because you made the time, to hit play and listen to this particular episode, I know you're the kind of person who values your time. And your time and energy is the single most important resource that you have.
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Chapter 2: How can stress contribute to disrespectful behavior?
It's easy for you to turn this back on yourself and blame yourself for the kind of reactions you have. Like, we're all so scared about getting emotional. I think a large reason why is many of us had a childhood where you were constantly invalidated and your feelings were dismissed. Don't cry. It's not that big of a deal. I never said that.
All that kind of stuff that teaches you it's just not safe for you to have feelings. And so if this is happening to you in your relationship, at work, in your friendships, as an adult, you have to start to care how you feel. Because when people question it or they brush it aside, it's a sign that they don't really care.
And they don't have the capacity to give you the space to feel what you feel, but you got to give yourself the space. It starts with you. And so I love some of the research here because it lifts up this topic in terms of its level of importance.
And this one's so subtle that I just want to call out some of the phrases that are a sign that somebody is dismissing your feelings and they're disrespecting you. So if you've ever had somebody say to you, you're so sensitive or you're overreacting. I mean, this is not a big deal. Why is this such a big deal? Or why does this have to cause such a problem? Why is everything with you an issue?
Or you think this is bad? Like people have bigger problems than this. I don't know why you're upset about this. When somebody says that to you, it means they actually don't care how you feel. You're an inconvenience and your feelings are now a bother to them and they don't want to have to deal with it. And so this is a big deal. And let me tell you why.
There was a study done by Gregory Wachowski at Walden University. This is what's called emotional invalidation. And the research is very clear on this. When your emotions are brushed aside, You're overreacting. This isn't a big deal. It doesn't just sting in the moment. It can have lasting effects. Constantly facing this kind of emotional invalidation, here's what it does.
It leads to increased stress, anxiety, even depression. And it also chips away at your confidence and your ability to handle life's ups and downs, and it can make challenges feel even more overwhelming. Why? Well, I'll tell you why. Because if you've got somebody in your life that's constantly going, why is this such a big deal? Like you're overreacting. Why are you so sensitive about everything?
I never meant it that way. Why do you have to get so upset about everything? When that constantly happens to you, you then start to question whether or not your feelings are valid. So first you have somebody invalidating you because they don't want to deal with your emotions. And now you start to wonder, am I the problem? Am I too sensitive? Maybe I shouldn't say anything.
So you start to shut down your emotions. And what I want you to do is the exact opposite. I want you to validate your emotions. So the next time that somebody does this to you, you're feeling something, you're upset about something, something's bothering you, you're working through something, and somebody has the disrespectful approach of going, why is this such a big deal?
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