Jake meets the woman who would soon become his wife. The two embark on a whirlwind romance, but life is anything but easy. Jake is an addict, and his addiction to heroin is all-consuming. Tension builds between the two, and we are left wondering who the real hero of this story is. Content warning: Pregnancy loss, drug use/abuse, addiction, emotional distress & mature content. Resources can be found on our website, blinkthepodcast.com Blink is part of The Binge - subscribe to The Binge to get new episodes of Blink one-week early and all episodes completely ad-free. Just Hit ‘Subscribe’ at the top of the Blink show page on Apple Podcasts or visit GetTheBinge.com. The Binge – feed your true crime obsession. Find out more about The Binge and other podcasts from Sony Music Entertainment at sonymusic.com/podcasts and follow us @sonypodcasts. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices . . . . . Hosted and produced by Corinne Vien Co-created by Jake Haendel Original composition by Michael Marguet Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
Chapter 1: What is 'Blink' about and who is the host?
Blink is intended for mature audiences as it discusses topics that can be upsetting, such as drug use, sexual assault, and emotional and physical violence. And in this particular episode, pregnancy and child loss is also mentioned. Content warnings for each episode are included in the show notes.
Resources for drug addiction and domestic abuse can be found in the show notes and on our website, blinkthepodcast.com. The testimonies and opinions expressed by guests of the show are their own and do not necessarily reflect the views of myself or affiliates of this podcast. Love. It's the promise of warmth, comfort, and safety, isn't it?
It's a force that we're all drawn to as if we're hardwired to crave it. And everyone deserves to be loved. But love does have a dark side. Choosing who we let close, who we let into the quietest, most fragile corners of our lives, it's a risk.
But the idea of finding someone who seems perfect, who knows just what to say, who makes you feel seen and safe, understood, loved, well, that makes it all worth it, right? But sometimes, instead of safety, we find betrayal. Sometimes, the hand you hold can be the hand that pulls you under. Love is a gamble, and it could cost you everything. This is Blink. I'm your host, Corinne Vien.
Thank you.
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Chapter 2: Who is Jake and how did he meet Ellen?
I was working as a sous chef in Hudson Mass at a place called the Horseshoe Pub. This place had like 150 beers on tap, I think a total of 900 beers, and they were trying to be like a gastropub, like doing this fancy-ish food paired with these beers. I was a nicotine addict, and I was smoking a cigarette in the back. This girl pulls in on like a Harley motorcycle. I could tell she was cute.
There was like three spots, the dumpster and this door and I'm smoking like at the door next to the dumpster. And she parked in one of the spots and I'm like... She coming here, you know, the back door, like she's not a customer. And I had never seen her. I'd worked there for a while. She gets off her bike and walks in the employee entrance right by me. And I was like, hey, or something.
And she was like, hi. And walks right in. I just said to myself, I'm like, who the fuck is that? This chick's riding a Harley that's, like, badass, you know? I had a friend working in the kitchen, too. And I remember asking, and I was like, yo, who's that girl? That's Ellen. She goes by Elle.
She works, like, once a month, attends bar on a Friday night, and makes, like, more money than we make in a week.
A few weeks went by and Jake continued working in the kitchen, seeing Ellen every few weeks.
I just remember feeling like she was spending more time in the kitchen than she needed to. And towards the end of the night, she was on there and I was like, hey, I'm like, we should hang out sometime. And she was like, yeah. And I'm like, can I get your number? And she was like, yeah.
They exchanged numbers and a few weeks later, Jake made another move and he texted Ellen.
Hey, this is Jake. You doing anything tonight? And she was like, yeah, I got plans, but definitely want to hang out real soon.
Another week went by, and this time, Ellen reached out, inviting Jake to a show with her in Boston.
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Chapter 3: What challenges did Jake face with his addiction?
What is he talking about?
They get to the show, and it's an EDM concert at a club in Cambridge, Massachusetts.
I buy her a drink or whatever, and he goes to some other friends finally. And she's like, oh, this dude keeps following me around like a puppy dog. And I'm like, oh, you don't like that? Who is he? She was like, just like a friend. He's been wanting to date me for a while, but it's like not going to happen. And she goes...
Okay, just like one thing I gotta ask you before we, you know, get going here. Do you do like opiates? Do you do heroin? And I'm kind of like, whoa, like what a question. I answered probably within three seconds, but it was like time kind of slowed down. I thought to myself, I'm like, well, you got two options here. Because I really did like her. Without even knowing her, I was attracted to her.
I was like, you got two options here. You can be a total piece of shit and lie, or you can tell her the truth and, like, probably eliminate your chances. I was actively trying to get my shit together, so it was kind of like the lie sounded okay. And, yeah, I lied. I was kind of like, well, like I've done it, but I don't like do it. She goes, oh, good. Cause I like, I like you.
What a fucking dick I am. I just like totally lied to this chick. She went into telling me about all the people she knows that have OD'd on these opiates. Particularly, she wasn't like against drugs. She did drugs. Like we took ecstasy shortly after this conversation. But the opiates, yeah, she was against that.
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Chapter 4: How did Jake's relationship with Ellen develop?
Later that evening, Jake recalls that Ellen asked him to go outside for a smoke. She didn't smoke, but it was an opportunity for the two of them to be alone.
And that's when I made the move. I was like, you want to just like get out of here?
Only problem, this was pre-Rideshare days, and the guy who drove them here was certainly not going to be cool with dropping the two of them off together.
This is where being a drug dealer comes in cool. Like, I remember I had my phone on silent and I was getting blown up. I probably had like 400 texts of people being like, yo, I need, can you meet? Where you at? I need, I need, I need. But I'm on a date, you know, I'm not answering that rent. Anyway, taking my phone real quick, I'm like, Most reliable, like who do I like most on this list?
Dude, like send me like 20 texts. And I was like, dude, I got whatever you want, but here's the trick. You can't say anything about it, and you've got to pick me and this girl up in Boston and drive us wherever we've got to go. He's like, on it, dude. See you in 30 minutes. I'm like, sick. And he had like a sick sports car kind of pit, you know.
I asked Jake at this point if he'd been carrying drugs on him at this time. How was he going to do this deal? And did he regularly cart this stuff around?
Yeah. Not backed up, but I had like probably a 10 gram package for a thousand dollar value or something. We're both rolling face in the back of this car, like looking at the lights. And I just remember us like making out in the back and touchy feely. Get out of the car. She goes to get something in her car.
That's when I quickly, I was like, yo, you got like a piece of paper, a dollar bill or something. And I just poured a shitload of powder out. And I was like, here, take it. Get out of here. And yeah, I probably gave him like $700 worth or something for that ride. You know, I didn't care though.
They get a ride back to Jake's car, which was parked at the restaurant where they both worked. Ellen then returned from her car, and Jake remembers her asking if he would be interested in walking her back to her house.
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Chapter 5: What lies did Jake tell Ellen and why?
The two get back to her house, which was her parents' house, and Jake recalls that Ellen then invited him into her room. And despite getting all the signals to move forward, Jake took it really slow that night. He did not make any more moves.
I didn't want to fuck it up with her because I liked her so much. I wanted to have a relationship with her.
The next morning, Ellen woke in a panic. She was late for work, so she had to leave and take off. Jake, without his car and with a dead phone, assured her he would be okay, she could leave. And he walked around lost for about eight miles before finally getting to a place where he could charge his phone, and then he hit up another client, offering drugs in exchange for a ride.
That day when she got off work, she texted me. From that day on, we never spent a day apart, actually. There was this bar in the same plaza of Horseshoe Pub, and it was a dive. Not a place I would typically go, but she liked it there. It had pool tables, and one thing I learned quickly, she was really good at pool. She told me, I play people in pool for drinks.
We won't pay for a single drink all night. And she would hustle these people so good. And for money, too. She was, like, really cool. Drives a Harley, sick of pool. She likes to have fun.
This is giving Hallmark movie written by a man.
She told me that she owned a house and had just sold it to buy an RV because she was about to tour the country in the RV. That's fucking awesome. And I remember being like, man, that'd be so good for me to like get out of here and get away from all these drugs. Yeah. I mean, that's kind of a selfish thought. I also love this girl, but how crazy would that be if I got myself actually clean?
And over this first two weeks, I drastically cut down on my dope use. I found myself so happy, I guess, with her that the the early onset of dope sickness was being very much um put off i was so into it that i'd be like wow i've been thought about dope in 10 hours and i feel fine and my drug dealing kind of took a hit which i wasn't mad about i felt it financially but i didn't care
Isn't this the plot to so many romance movies? Troubled man and lonely woman meet. Man changes for the better because of his love for the woman. And yeah, it's a little cliche, but obviously the movie characters, they need to encounter some obstacles along the way, right? And in Jake and Ellen's case, there was a decent obstacle right off the bat.
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Chapter 6: How did Jake try to improve his life?
Something that, when uncovered, would be the climax in this film.
relationship definitely started on a lie and for being totally honest i mean she portrayed herself as like having it going on like owned a house on her own multiple jobs this rv very financially independent i just felt like what the fuck do i really have going on
Ellen asked Jake why he was living at the hotel. He explained his brother's struggle with mental illness. And Jake had spent some time at his dad's house, too. And Ellen asked him whose house that was.
I was like, oh, it's mine. Throw to that lie out there.
I mean, hey, what's another lie, right? Interesting plot point. Building tension. When will we see the female character discover her love interest lies? Oh wait, this is not a movie. This is Jake's actual life. So why did he lie?
You know, trying to portray that I was on her level, I suppose. When in reality, my life was like on a downward slope in the last year.
And Jake continued to work on his image, showing Ellen the good in him while trying to secretly work on fixing all of the things he knew were bad.
I feel like Jake was kind of looking for some legitimacy. Like her parents had a nice home on the lake and all this stuff. I think he wanted to show her that he had some stability. So he wanted her to meet me and my wife. And we did. I remember he kind of reengaged, I think, at that point.
Not that we'd been completely cut off, but he became a little more, for a month or two, he became more family oriented. She seemed very polite. She wasn't afraid of like, oh, here's my fiance's parents. Are they going to like me? I mean, she was just herself, you know.
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