Whitney Wolfe Herd
Appearances
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Find Your Purpose, Get Unstuck & Ignite Your Dreams w/ Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd
I've come to realize that self-worth does not equal net worth. But I will tell you that on paper, at my on paper wealthiest, according to society's standards, I was spiritually the poorest I've ever been. You're just going there right away. And I love this so much. And I just watched myself get decimated on the internet and turned into this scorned woman.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Find Your Purpose, Get Unstuck & Ignite Your Dreams w/ Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd
Yeah. So just to touch on a bit of what you just said, I think if I could, and I'm still on my journey, so I feel like I can say this with a sense of we're in this together to whoever is watching or listening, because I don't think I've arrived at my final destination. Certainly I hope not. I'm 35. So I hope that there's still a lot ahead. I will say the following. If I sat down
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Find Your Purpose, Get Unstuck & Ignite Your Dreams w/ Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd
and I put the 10 worst days of my life on a piece of paper, and I reflected on those days from where I am today, it doesn't take away from the pain of those days. It doesn't take away from how hard they were, but the reframing I'm able to have now is without those days, Without them, I wouldn't be here.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Find Your Purpose, Get Unstuck & Ignite Your Dreams w/ Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd
So technically, the worst days, it's hard to call them the best days because that's not factual. They were critical days. They were necessary. The hard parts were the good parts because without the hard parts, you don't really get to that next stepping stone. And so I really believe whoever you are listening, whoever is going through setbacks,
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Find Your Purpose, Get Unstuck & Ignite Your Dreams w/ Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd
They feel like they're just getting punched, you know, time and time again by life, work, relationships. rejections, it's because these are happening for a reason. And so I think we all fight rejection. We all fight it. Why did this happen to us? I didn't want that to happen. But I think if we actually get into the flow of it and say, okay, let's look at the bigger picture.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Find Your Purpose, Get Unstuck & Ignite Your Dreams w/ Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd
Why is this all happening? There is a bigger arc here. There's a bigger path here. And so the reason why I say that is if I go back and I reflect on my time at Tinder and I had a choice when I left. I could have spent all of my time feeling disappointed and sad and devastated about what had transpired at the company.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Find Your Purpose, Get Unstuck & Ignite Your Dreams w/ Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd
Or I could have said, I'm going to learn from this and I'm going to take what almost killed me and make us stronger. And I think this is very important framing because we all walk around saying, what didn't kill me made me stronger. And I think the way I look at life is what did almost kill me can make all of us stronger.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Find Your Purpose, Get Unstuck & Ignite Your Dreams w/ Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd
Yeah.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Find Your Purpose, Get Unstuck & Ignite Your Dreams w/ Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd
And you've been there.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Find Your Purpose, Get Unstuck & Ignite Your Dreams w/ Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd
So, yeah. Yeah. That's right. So, you know, I really, and people have a hard time believing this. I can't tell you how many times I meet someone and they're like, Oh, you built Bumble as a revenge story. Wow. You had a chip on your shoulder and you really got, you really got them. And I'm like, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. If I had for one second, um,
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Find Your Purpose, Get Unstuck & Ignite Your Dreams w/ Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd
And I want to be very clear, and everyone should remember this. If I had for one second been operating with the intention or the energy of vendetta, revenge, or a chip on my shoulder, I would not be in this seat today with you right now. Yeah. Revenge is not a plot for success. It's not. There are a thousand famous philosophical quotes attributed to what revenge really is.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Find Your Purpose, Get Unstuck & Ignite Your Dreams w/ Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd
And just like that, at 24, it was all over. So yeah, I retreated to Uggs and staying inside and hiding. I didn't have anything. Everything had been stripped. I was turned on and I had nothing. But it's one of the best things that ever happened to me because when you have your dignity, perceived dignity, your perceived self-worth taken from you,
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Find Your Purpose, Get Unstuck & Ignite Your Dreams w/ Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd
Some of the famous ones are, revenge is drinking poison and waiting for the other person to die. There's a thousand of these. I have never once, Jamie... had an inner intention, wish, desire, or energy towards seeking revenge. When I was at Tinder, all I wanted was to see this product that was helping people connect to succeed.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Find Your Purpose, Get Unstuck & Ignite Your Dreams w/ Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd
And I had differing opinions than the leadership that I was building the company with. And, you know, I don't talk about these people because candidly, I'm of the mindset that, you know, love and light. I genuinely, when I think back on anyone involved, instead of getting angry or upset or stressed, I close my eyes and I literally cover them in bright light
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Find Your Purpose, Get Unstuck & Ignite Your Dreams w/ Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd
And I say, I wish them love and light on their journey. Genuinely. That is it. And I carry on. And so even though I was, you know, I was 22 when we started Tinder. I was 24 when I left. The way I left was very dramatic. I really don't rehash it. If anyone wants to Google it, they're more than welcome to. It's not that exciting. It's so old news. But it was a very contentious exit.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Find Your Purpose, Get Unstuck & Ignite Your Dreams w/ Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd
And it led to a very, very public lawsuit. very public. I never had the intention or wish or want to be involved in a lawsuit to begin with, and nor did I ever want it to be public. So here I was, 24 years old, and I'll never forget, I woke up at maybe three in the morning, the night the lawsuit had been filed. And when you file a lawsuit, it's very public and it gets picked up.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Find Your Purpose, Get Unstuck & Ignite Your Dreams w/ Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd
But I never could have expected it going global or front page of this or that. And I woke up and I think I had a billion, not actually, but just countless notifications. And I was headline after headline after headline after headline after headline, And I just watched my life leave my body in terms of like, okay, the narrative is now no longer the truth.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Find Your Purpose, Get Unstuck & Ignite Your Dreams w/ Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd
It is whatever the internet has turned it into. And what's scary about something like that happening when you're 24 years old and your entire life is wrapped up in this company you helped create is they can take it from you. They meaning the collective, the narrative, the fodder, the chatter, the collective kind of opinion.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Find Your Purpose, Get Unstuck & Ignite Your Dreams w/ Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd
They can rob you blind of your identity and of your dignity and of your happiness. And so the internet attacked me. This was before Me Too. This was before Time's Up, this whole narrative of women's equality at work. And I just watched myself get decimated on the internet and turned into this scorned woman. And just like that, at 24, it was all over.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Find Your Purpose, Get Unstuck & Ignite Your Dreams w/ Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd
So yeah, I retreated to Uggs and staying inside and hiding. And I was very fortunate to have my now husband as my boyfriend at the time, God bless him. But I didn't have anything. Everything had been stripped. My title had been stripped from me, and my contributions were questioned extensively in the media. So all of that was gone.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Find Your Purpose, Get Unstuck & Ignite Your Dreams w/ Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd
My financial gain in the company was being fought over through this lawsuit. And my friends were gone. I was turned on. And I had nothing. But it's one of the best things that ever happened to me. Because when you have your dignity, perceived dignity, your perceived self-worth taken from you, this kind of magical thing happens where you realize you've nothing left to fear. Mm-hmm. It's gone.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Find Your Purpose, Get Unstuck & Ignite Your Dreams w/ Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd
Your worst nightmare is playing out in real life. What else is there left to give? And so many of us are scared to start or do or try because we don't want to lose this thing, whatever that might be. But it was gone. And that's where the magic started. That was where the magic happened. because the space was cleared.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Find Your Purpose, Get Unstuck & Ignite Your Dreams w/ Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd
This kind of magical thing happens where you realize you've nothing left to fear. It's gone. So many of us are scared to start or do or try because we don't want to lose this thing, whatever that might be. But it was gone. And that's where the magic started. That was where the magic happened because the space was cleared.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Find Your Purpose, Get Unstuck & Ignite Your Dreams w/ Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd
Yeah. Yeah. I would say that it, So if my memory serves me well, I believe the lawsuit was public by the end of June 2014. I had left the company in April of 2014. Some of the darkest months were April to June. Dark, dark, dark, dark, hard, horrible, heavy, lonely. Everything was gone. And then the lawsuit launched. And I'll never forget, I turned 25 years old about a week later.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Find Your Purpose, Get Unstuck & Ignite Your Dreams w/ Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd
And here I was, 25, 25. Let's really think about that for a second. 25 is like the edge of becoming a real adult. But you're still so young. Yes. And you're still so full of life. And you're still so... allowed to be flawed. 25 year olds are allowed to be 25. They're allowed to go to the bar and have a couple too many drinks.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Find Your Purpose, Get Unstuck & Ignite Your Dreams w/ Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd
They're allowed to get fired and sleep on their parents' couch for a few months. They are allowed to be 25. That was taken from me. And I was not allowed to be 25. I all of a sudden needed to be a very, very strong warrior. And I basically had to exist in two realities. One reality was warrior, go forward, get in the arena, go for it. Be brave, be bold, be courageous.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Find Your Purpose, Get Unstuck & Ignite Your Dreams w/ Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd
Even though you're scared to death, just be courageous. And it's a very famous quote, but courage actually can't exist with the absence of fear. You have to be scared to be courageous. That's what courage means. So I just had to be courageous. But at the same time, I was completely devastated and traumatized, deeply traumatized. So what's fascinating, Jamie, is I started Bumble.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Find Your Purpose, Get Unstuck & Ignite Your Dreams w/ Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd
We had Bumble live in the app store by December 1st of 2014. So if you think through that, I left in April of 2014. The lawsuit went live at the end of June and Bumble was alive in the public by December 1st. So I had to exist in two realities, one of pain and and wound, it was like running a marathon with a sprained ankle, whatever the metaphor of that is.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Find Your Purpose, Get Unstuck & Ignite Your Dreams w/ Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd
And I'm not trying to be insensitive to anyone that's actually had to run a marathon in worse circumstances, but whatever that vision is that you can think of, you have to just go, you gotta keep going. You don't have time to stop. And so it was this kind of blessing and curse at the same time where I had to just keep going.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Find Your Purpose, Get Unstuck & Ignite Your Dreams w/ Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd
And I think so many people around the world, regardless of their circumstances, which have been much worse than mine, you just have to go in forward motion. You just have to go in forward motion. It's the only option we have.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Find Your Purpose, Get Unstuck & Ignite Your Dreams w/ Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd
And that's it. It's moving the mindset from me to we. That's it. And candidly, that was what drove me every day, just like it drove you every day. You got up there and you weren't selling a solution for yourself necessarily. You're like, oh, I am affected by this. And I did use my personal situation to create a solution.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Find Your Purpose, Get Unstuck & Ignite Your Dreams w/ Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd
But you didn't do it for you. Right.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Find Your Purpose, Get Unstuck & Ignite Your Dreams w/ Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd
I heard a voice in my head. I don't know whose voice it was. I heard a voice clear as day, and it said... Like, I have chills thinking about it. All these years later, enter Tinder. Enter another traumatic situation. These patterns that we're all in, we're all in patterns until we break them.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Find Your Purpose, Get Unstuck & Ignite Your Dreams w/ Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd
Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Find Your Purpose, Get Unstuck & Ignite Your Dreams w/ Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd
And my pattern was broken when I laid on that ground, literally on the bath mat after Tinder, and I said, oh my God, oh my God, this is it. I am going to course crack this whole thing. I'm going to create a positive social network. I'm going to harness technology for good. And I'm going to take what almost killed me and I'm going to make us stronger. And that was the moment.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Find Your Purpose, Get Unstuck & Ignite Your Dreams w/ Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd
Inspiration and mentors matter. Like seeing things that inspire us matter. Get inspired. Watch the show with everybody you bring on. Like, you know, read about people that have defeated their own odds and that energy does kind of impart on us and we can do it too.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Find Your Purpose, Get Unstuck & Ignite Your Dreams w/ Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd
Thank you. Thank you. This all feels like it's saying different things, but I think the meaning of all of this is like trust and love, right? Isn't that the center of it?
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Find Your Purpose, Get Unstuck & Ignite Your Dreams w/ Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd
I think I did not believe there was one, but I will say, like you, I don't know how it was for you as a child. I was... Born very intuitive. Yeah. I have gotten what I call downloads or premonitions my whole life. My whole life. I mean, I have spoken to family members like, oh, you said this thing when you were seven and then it happened the next day. Like, it's just part of who I am.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Find Your Purpose, Get Unstuck & Ignite Your Dreams w/ Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd
And I think we all are capable of it. It's just how far open have we allowed ourselves to be? But I think my abilities had outpaced my belief, right? Like I was operating beyond what I believed was possible. And so I just shut it down. I was like, that's not possible. That's crazy. But no, I think there were moments along the way that started to open me up and now I would consider myself
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Find Your Purpose, Get Unstuck & Ignite Your Dreams w/ Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd
I would say spirituality is one of my number one core life priorities. And when it's nurtured, I am in an alignment. And when it's not, like when that spiritual plug comes out of the wall, I'm like, oh, whoa, where are we? I'm off kilter. So I've got to stay plugged in. And that has to, you know, you got to keep that electric cord plugged in and meditation, nature. Yeah.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Find Your Purpose, Get Unstuck & Ignite Your Dreams w/ Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd
genuine connection, those are the recipes for that, in my opinion.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Find Your Purpose, Get Unstuck & Ignite Your Dreams w/ Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd
But can you share a little bit about that? Well, I think you said it perfect. It's like the 27th person might respond, right? And this is so, so the symbolism of your story is like, had you given up on the 1,000th time, right before that final yes, like if you had accepted the no, we wouldn't be here today. But there's a distinction here that I think is important for people.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Find Your Purpose, Get Unstuck & Ignite Your Dreams w/ Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd
I always ask people, what's the why? Like, why are you doing it? Like, what is the bigger, what can this do for people? Like, what is this solving? What are you solving for? And I think where a lot of people should ask themselves and get self-reflective when they have businesses, maybe it's not going the right way. I think I would encourage people to say, who is this serving? Who is this helping?
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Find Your Purpose, Get Unstuck & Ignite Your Dreams w/ Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd
Because I really do believe that every great innovation, every great business, every great, you know, breakthrough in medicine or in science, it's not driven out of randomness. Most of it is driven out of some type of heartbreak or deep dissatisfaction.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Find Your Purpose, Get Unstuck & Ignite Your Dreams w/ Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd
Someone knew somebody that tragically got sick with a rare disease and it destroyed their lives and it spurred them to go and, you know, find a cure. And while they lost the person in their lives, which is devastating, maybe there's millions of people around the world who in current day and in the future that will be spared because of that.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Find Your Purpose, Get Unstuck & Ignite Your Dreams w/ Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd
And so I think intention, coming back to intention, like why are you doing what you're doing? And I fundamentally believe that the right intention will give you energy. It won't take it from you. So even though you're drained and even though that you're exhausted by the no's, like you've got it in you to just go that one more step. It's the perseverance, right?
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Find Your Purpose, Get Unstuck & Ignite Your Dreams w/ Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd
It's having the purpose beyond me or I or just my own needs. And you're a perfect example of this. So I think my big push to anybody that feels like they're in setback and setback, if they can say with sincerity, That what they're doing is serving the greater good of humanity. Whether it's even only 10 people a year are predicted to get this disease. That is still important.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Find Your Purpose, Get Unstuck & Ignite Your Dreams w/ Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd
Someone is still going to suffer without what you're doing, without the thing you're doing. You've got to keep going. But if you're doing it because you wanted to start a business and you wanted to make money, wrong. Stop. Reset. Why are you doing what you're doing? And that is my belief. Like there is no such thing worth fighting for that only serves ourselves. That's my firm belief.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Find Your Purpose, Get Unstuck & Ignite Your Dreams w/ Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd
In your tummy, yeah.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Find Your Purpose, Get Unstuck & Ignite Your Dreams w/ Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd
Energy is everything. I mean, we are literally made of it. And there's things that take it and there's things that replenish it. And, you know, it's interesting. Bumble has been wildly covered in the media. And I cannot tell you, Jamie, how many people have called me and been like, okay, what's your press strategy? Like what agencies did you use?
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Find Your Purpose, Get Unstuck & Ignite Your Dreams w/ Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd
Like who was the best person that like wrote your press releases? And I'm like, okay, let me be clear. Yes, we've had kick-ass people on our team. This is the pure intention of the business. It wrote itself. True, genuine intentionality behind anything, that is, it's the authenticity that actually matters. And so we started this conversation today. You're like, you're an open book.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Find Your Purpose, Get Unstuck & Ignite Your Dreams w/ Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd
How are you an open book? I'm telling you right now that authenticity is the only frequency for me. Like you would just have to be authentic. And that doesn't mean you have to pour your heart out. You can be guarded. You can be private. I think we can all have our own boundaries for what work for us. That's our prerogative. And it's also our needs.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Find Your Purpose, Get Unstuck & Ignite Your Dreams w/ Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd
Like we all have to define what works for us as individuals. But what I do think is going to come out in the coming years, and we're already seeing the shift with media, with influencers, with everything, like authenticity can't be engineered. It can't be written. It can't be faked. It is genuinely, it has to be real.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Find Your Purpose, Get Unstuck & Ignite Your Dreams w/ Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd
And that's why I always say, like, take me with all my flaws, all my weaknesses, and All of my scratches and, you know, all of the battle wounds, like, you're going to get me at the end of the day. And if that doesn't work for you, then, like, that's okay. You know, this is the train I'm on. This is where I'm going. And I think we should all just be trying to be our highest versions of ourselves.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Find Your Purpose, Get Unstuck & Ignite Your Dreams w/ Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd
It's interesting, Jamie. I wrote myself an email this summer. Bumble stock had hit its all-time low. And the internet fodder was like, Bumble's dead. And what a joke. And I mean, like, if I was attached to headlines or ego, it would have been a dark day. Let's just put it that way. But I'm so free of that now.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Find Your Purpose, Get Unstuck & Ignite Your Dreams w/ Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd
I wrote myself an email and I said, today is one of the best days of my life because I can actually tell you with certainty because I'm living it. Net worth, accolades, All the external things does not equal happiness. It does not equal self-worth. And I wrote all the reasons why I'm happy. All the beautiful gifts. My children are safe. They're healthy. Thank God.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Find Your Purpose, Get Unstuck & Ignite Your Dreams w/ Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd
I love myself, not because I'm a narcissist or I'm obsessed with myself, but because we all should love ourselves, because we should all give ourselves grace. And we are enough. All of us are enough, each and every one of us, whoever we are and however we are. And I think when you can actually just say that out loud, Like all is okay.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Find Your Purpose, Get Unstuck & Ignite Your Dreams w/ Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd
And I literally wrote that letter to myself on a day that should have been perceived as a bad day. I got a hundred texts. Are you okay, babe? Are you okay? Can I do anything for you? And I'm like, I'm good. I'm good. I'm outside. I'm looking at the trees. Everything is fine. So I think, you know, if we can all get to a place where we don't build businesses for the validation. Yeah.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Find Your Purpose, Get Unstuck & Ignite Your Dreams w/ Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd
Or the recognition. That's actually, first of all, when it comes. That's when you start getting recognized.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Find Your Purpose, Get Unstuck & Ignite Your Dreams w/ Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd
Because you're not seeking it. It's exactly what you said.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Find Your Purpose, Get Unstuck & Ignite Your Dreams w/ Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd
Yes. I was totally obsessed with Walt Disney, not Disney the brand. I loved the brand, but I wasn't obsessed with Disney in a traditional sense. Let me explain that. I was obsessed with Walt Disney. I was completely obsessed with Walt Disney. I was fascinated that a human being could use their mind and imagine something and create a dream world.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Find Your Purpose, Get Unstuck & Ignite Your Dreams w/ Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd
I was completely mesmerized by the capability of the human mind and then the ability of someone to execute on that. So I remember sitting in class as a little girl and I would do the same W as Walt Disney for my name, for Whitney Wolfe.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Find Your Purpose, Get Unstuck & Ignite Your Dreams w/ Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd
And so I probably have a thousand notebooks from when I was a child, like elementary school, where I'm doing the same signature as Walt Disney, Whitney Wolf, because it was Walt with that W. And I wanted the same W. I was like, what a magical creature. My high school yearbook quote was, I don't have it memorized, but something like, if you can dream it, you can do it.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Find Your Purpose, Get Unstuck & Ignite Your Dreams w/ Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd
Like this all started with a mouse and a dream, right? Something along those lines. And I will say, like, I've always been a dreamer, always been a dreamer. And I was just so inspired that someone could take a dream and what I like to call a download or an inspiration or... whatever you want to call it, right? And then really turn it into something that others can enjoy or get value from.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Find Your Purpose, Get Unstuck & Ignite Your Dreams w/ Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd
That's so sweet of you. Thank you. I'm so happy to be here. Thank you for having me. What an honor. I just absolutely adore you, and there's nothing better than connecting with a true friend over some coffee and a microphone.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Find Your Purpose, Get Unstuck & Ignite Your Dreams w/ Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd
And so as I reflect now as a 35-year-old woman sitting here with you, the fact that the little girl drawing the Walt Disney signature can say that there's like babies out in the world that are running around and living in beautiful, sweet, happy families because of a product I helped create. you know, it's pretty, that's like pretty rewarding.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Find Your Purpose, Get Unstuck & Ignite Your Dreams w/ Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd
And I know you have the same ability to say the same thing. And so I guess the message I would have for people is like, I was just a little girl in Salt Lake City, Utah, trying to scribble my name after Walt Disney, like inspiration and mentors matter, like seeing things that inspire us matter.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Find Your Purpose, Get Unstuck & Ignite Your Dreams w/ Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd
And so I think my point is like, get inspired, watch the show with everybody you bring on, like, you know, read about people that have defeated their own odds and, that energy does kind of impart on us and we can do it too.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Find Your Purpose, Get Unstuck & Ignite Your Dreams w/ Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd
This book literally will teach you how to actually feel worthy so that you can have the strength, you can have the confidence.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Find Your Purpose, Get Unstuck & Ignite Your Dreams w/ Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd
Well, first of all, that's such a compliment. And I would say the exact same thing about you. we are all inherently deeply authentic people. But then we choose to, for whatever reason, at various parts in our journeys or throughout our lives, we choose to put on a mask.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Find Your Purpose, Get Unstuck & Ignite Your Dreams w/ Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd
And the mask is generally there to what we believe protect us or to shield us or to save us from someone judging us or not wanting us or accepting us or disapproving of us. And what I've really come to realize is like we were all born deeply authentic. We are all so our authentic selves.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Find Your Purpose, Get Unstuck & Ignite Your Dreams w/ Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd
And then slowly somewhere along the way, we convince ourselves that we should blend in or be a part of the crowd or change who we are. And I just had this. I don't know if it's realization or whatever, download, however you want to call it. But I realized after I left Tinder that there were so many times that I was not authentic to myself when I was there.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Find Your Purpose, Get Unstuck & Ignite Your Dreams w/ Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd
And I just promised myself after that whole ordeal that I'm not always going to be the best and I'm not always going to win and I'm not always going to be loved and I'm not always going to be liked and I won't be accepted and I won't be invited. But the one thing no one can take away from me is at the end of the day, I'm always going to be me. whatever that means.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Find Your Purpose, Get Unstuck & Ignite Your Dreams w/ Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd
And so I think it's a commitment to ourselves to fall back in love with that authentic version of who we are and try to honor that and live with that. And so that's kind of where I'm at now. And I just try to be me. I don't even know what that means. And it's not for everyone. And that's okay.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Find Your Purpose, Get Unstuck & Ignite Your Dreams w/ Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd
Yes, I'm not going to pretend and say, oh, I don't care what people think or that didn't hurt my feelings or so-and-so didn't invite me or so-and-so doesn't like me and who cares? No, I mean, we're all, even when we are our highest selves, we are all having a very earthly experience here in these bodies that we have. And with that comes all of those feelings that we all possess.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Find Your Purpose, Get Unstuck & Ignite Your Dreams w/ Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd
And so I think the way I... deal with that is I don't shame myself for having hurt feelings or for caring what someone did or didn't think about me. I just kind of look at it and I stare at it and say, okay, that's okay. That's like a wounded part of you that is feeling that way and we'll live with it. We'll accept all these pieces. And so that way it doesn't take over your life.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Find Your Purpose, Get Unstuck & Ignite Your Dreams w/ Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd
And there were years of my life that all I cared about was what people thought about me. At any cost, I did not want someone to dislike me. It was my worst fear. And then you're kind of like, this is a full-time job and one I'm not getting paid for. So, you know, why am I doing this?
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Find Your Purpose, Get Unstuck & Ignite Your Dreams w/ Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd
It's draining my accounts, physically, spiritually, mentally, you know, the metaphor of just like being completely bankrupt. But emotionally, and I'll share one thing, so fascinating and because you led with this, It's not something I ever really think about because I've come to realize that self-worth does not equal net worth.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Find Your Purpose, Get Unstuck & Ignite Your Dreams w/ Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd
And I'm a very privileged person who's had the opportunity to learn that. But I will tell you that on paper, at my on paper wealthiest, according to society's standards, I was spiritually the poorest I've ever been. And I think that's really important for people to know. It's like, that's not where you get your worth.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Find Your Purpose, Get Unstuck & Ignite Your Dreams w/ Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd
Yeah. So just to touch on a bit of what you just said, I think if I could, and I'm still on my journey, so I feel like I can say this with... a sense of we're in this together to whoever is watching or listening, because I don't think I've arrived at my final destination. Certainly I hope not, I'm 35. So I hope that there's still a lot ahead. I will say the following.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Manifest Friends, Mentors & Incredible Relationships w/Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd Pt 2
I went home and cried after the IPO. Why was I crying? Why? I mean, on the surface, I should be popping bottles, celebrating. I was a wreck. I was so depleted. I was so disconnected from myself. It was all about getting there. It was all about like getting to the top of this mountain, like exhaustion, complete exhaustion.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Manifest Friends, Mentors & Incredible Relationships w/Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd Pt 2
And that beautiful baby on my hip that was there in the videos and the photos with the confetti, like that little baby had not seen his mom rested, energized, calm in so long. In so long. Because I felt like you know, I have to get there. I have to do this. I gotta do it. I gotta do it. I gotta do it. I gotta do it.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Manifest Friends, Mentors & Incredible Relationships w/Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd Pt 2
And I think this quest of like the greater good, it can also come at the expense of ourselves. So I think that's such a lesson that I've learned over the last year of time. I don't call it time off. I call it time in. You know, they always talk about, we don't do timeout with our kids, but it's so funny. I'm always like, okay, Bobby, it's time for time in, not time out.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Manifest Friends, Mentors & Incredible Relationships w/Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd Pt 2
Let's do some time in where we need to go in. We need to like reconnect because it's all so crazy out here. So crazy. So, so crazy. There's like so many things that are pulling at us and needing us and depleting us and draining us. And drowning us. And if we don't go in and replenish our energy, what do we have left? We're shells. We're just vessels. And I think this year in or out,
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Manifest Friends, Mentors & Incredible Relationships w/Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd Pt 2
wherever it's been right in this different realm has been such a gift because I've had time to sit and pause and reflect and realize like all the shiny objects just don't matter. Like if you're not healthy, your team's not healthy. If you're not energized, the customers aren't energized. Like You have to set the tone at the top, you know?
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Manifest Friends, Mentors & Incredible Relationships w/Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd Pt 2
And also don't pretend to women around the world that you can bounce a baby on your hip and take a company public for $15 billion all on a Monday. And it's just all gravy because that's not true. It's hard. It's super hard. And that's okay, right? You can do it, but you can't do everything all at once without something breaking. And the thing that broke was me. It was me. That's what broke.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Manifest Friends, Mentors & Incredible Relationships w/Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd Pt 2
And so I had to put it back together.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Manifest Friends, Mentors & Incredible Relationships w/Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd Pt 2
If you're not a believer, you should probably go take a coffee break." And I thought, okay, this is it. This is literally hell on earth. She said, I was in a toxic marriage for a very long time, and I read about you. I read about what you did with Bumble, and it gave me the courage to leave my marriage And once I had rebuilt my strength and my self-confidence, I downloaded Bumble because of you.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Manifest Friends, Mentors & Incredible Relationships w/Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd Pt 2
That's right. Yeah. So I think I'm going back with a lot of perspective. Yeah. It's funny. One of my board members said this profound thing to me. She said, everything's better the second time around. You know, if you think about the first time you do anything, it's always, it's new, it's scary. You're learning on the job. And the second time around is just profoundly easier.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Manifest Friends, Mentors & Incredible Relationships w/Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd Pt 2
And you have perspective, you have wisdom, you have learnings. And so I think I go back with...
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Manifest Friends, Mentors & Incredible Relationships w/Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd Pt 2
the energy of love like bumble has always been at its core about love and what i've realized in this time in whatever you want to call it um the entire meaning of life genuinely and i'm sure we could go ask all of the philosophical and spiritual leaders that we know and don't know and if we ask them we kind of said define the meaning of life in one word
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Manifest Friends, Mentors & Incredible Relationships w/Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd Pt 2
We asked a hundred like spiritual leaders or evolved people. We asked them the meaning of life in one word, and they have to pick one word only. I'm going to bet. It's a guess. I'm going to bet that 80% or more say the word love. I'm going to bet that. And I fundamentally believe that that is the meaning of life.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Manifest Friends, Mentors & Incredible Relationships w/Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd Pt 2
And if I have the opportunity or dharma or whatever you want to call it to help spread love in the world, then sign me up. Put me in, coach. Let's go. Like, let's get back in the arena because that's a noble mission. And if I can assemble the special forces of love around me to go out and help reinstill love in all the ways...
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Manifest Friends, Mentors & Incredible Relationships w/Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd Pt 2
through friendship, community, your romantic love, and most importantly, through self-love, that can be transformational for people.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Manifest Friends, Mentors & Incredible Relationships w/Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd Pt 2
One million percent.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Manifest Friends, Mentors & Incredible Relationships w/Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd Pt 2
How can you lead others if you can't lead yourself?
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Manifest Friends, Mentors & Incredible Relationships w/Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd Pt 2
Not anymore. No. I was riddled in it and insecure and scared. And what's this person gonna think about me? Oh, did I hurt their feelings? Like, what are they gonna say? What are they gonna think? What are they gonna write about me? What's the article gonna say? Petrified. And that was a trauma response. That was coming from a place of fear.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Manifest Friends, Mentors & Incredible Relationships w/Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd Pt 2
I was operating from a place of fear, fear of not being loved, not being accepted, not being enough, not being good enough, not being, you know, whatever you want to call it. And I think I just, you know, this is important too, because we spent a lot of time talking about all these accolades, like, oh, the IPO and the, it was a $15 billion company. And You know, the Forbes and da-da-da-da-da-da.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Manifest Friends, Mentors & Incredible Relationships w/Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd Pt 2
And I've never met anyone with my fiance's name. And he is the love of my life. And he is wonderful. After an abusive marriage, which is basically my whole story. It was my whole purpose. If that's not the universe telling you that, you know, check. The intention was pure and good. I don't know what else is.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Manifest Friends, Mentors & Incredible Relationships w/Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd Pt 2
But what people maybe don't realize about the last year is I climbed up to the top of this mountain and then I crashed down. The stock fell 80%. I stopped getting invited to the cool conferences. Oh, yeah. Do you know how many invites I did not get to these like big macho masculine rulers of the free world conferences that I was invited to for eight years? They all stopped.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Manifest Friends, Mentors & Incredible Relationships w/Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd Pt 2
The invites stopped coming in. I stopped getting phone calls. I was irrelevant.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Manifest Friends, Mentors & Incredible Relationships w/Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd Pt 2
I stopped getting invited to the cool conferences. Oh, yeah. Do you know how many invites I did not get to these like big macho masculine rulers of the free world conferences that I was invited to for eight years? They all stopped. The invites stopped coming in. I stopped getting phone calls. I was irrelevant. But you know what was beautiful about that?
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Manifest Friends, Mentors & Incredible Relationships w/Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd Pt 2
And thank you, universe, God, whoever you are for giving me that opportunity to Because I learned that that's not what matters. That's not the point. And hell, it hurt. It hurt. Many a tears were cried when those invites didn't roll in.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Manifest Friends, Mentors & Incredible Relationships w/Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd Pt 2
When I found out early after stopping being CEO, I'll never forget when I got uninvited to this one conference, this like macho, masculine, cool conference, I cried for two days. It hurt my feelings. So this would have been just a little over a year ago. Yeah. gutted me. The same way I probably would have cried in middle school when the girls didn't invite me to a birthday party.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Manifest Friends, Mentors & Incredible Relationships w/Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd Pt 2
Or I remember fourth grade, there was a group of girls, fifth grade, didn't get invited to the birthday party and I didn't want to leave my room for, you know, the whole weekend. That same inner wounded, not enough part of me was so triggered as an adult being upset that I wasn't invited to this conference with all the big wigs, right? And Humans don't change. We just play on different scales.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Manifest Friends, Mentors & Incredible Relationships w/Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd Pt 2
Like, you know, the cool kids table just changes. It gets bigger. It gets more interesting. It gets scarier. I mean, you've got to disassociate from that stuff. It's going to be there no matter what.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Manifest Friends, Mentors & Incredible Relationships w/Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd Pt 2
Not anymore. No. I was riddled in it. I climbed up to the top of this mountain and then I crashed down. The stock fell 80%. I stopped getting invited to the cool conferences. I said, oh yeah. And hell, it hurt. It hurt. Many a tears were cried when those invites didn't roll in. And that's where I'm at now, Jamie. You can't hurt my feelings anymore. You can't.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Manifest Friends, Mentors & Incredible Relationships w/Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd Pt 2
Yeah, so many people. But you know what? I can't blame them because you know why? That's the frequency they're on. It's a radio.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Manifest Friends, Mentors & Incredible Relationships w/Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd Pt 2
It's a radio.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Manifest Friends, Mentors & Incredible Relationships w/Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd Pt 2
No, they're on a different station. They are on a different station. They're on a different station. And I'm on a different station. We are in different frequencies. And that's okay. Some people like, you know, 98.1 FM and some people like 106.7. And we're on different frequencies, different strokes for different folks. And that's where I'm at now, Jamie. You can't hurt my feelings anymore.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Manifest Friends, Mentors & Incredible Relationships w/Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd Pt 2
You can't. I'm not saying you ever would, but I'm saying out there, they, whoever this group is or next group will be or whoever it's going to be next, you can't take that from me. It's mine. Yeah. And I can tell you it is the biggest gift I've ever been given. Yeah. I went through some version of like an ego death. And now I'm like, let's go. Let's lead with love. I'm not leading with fear.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Manifest Friends, Mentors & Incredible Relationships w/Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd Pt 2
I'm not going to lead with insecurity. I'm not going to lead with like, what's someone going to think about me? I do not care. Genuinely. And I can say that sincerely. I think you can tell I don't bullshit you. Like you get what you get with me.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Manifest Friends, Mentors & Incredible Relationships w/Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd Pt 2
And I wasn't there a year ago.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Manifest Friends, Mentors & Incredible Relationships w/Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd Pt 2
Oh yeah. And by the way, it's kind of embarrassing to admit to all of this, right? But if I can't admit it, how can anybody admit it? Yeah, yeah. Like... Because we've all been there.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Manifest Friends, Mentors & Incredible Relationships w/Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd Pt 2
And we, no matter who we are in the world, like the woman who's living in the small town and, you know, is trying to start her own, you know, small business, like... She might feel this way with the other moms in the community. I mean, this can happen to us at any level. And I think it was Mel Robbins who said recently, I saw a clip somewhere. It was like, let them.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Manifest Friends, Mentors & Incredible Relationships w/Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd Pt 2
Like, I thought that was so profound because I never actually put those words together, the let them concept.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Manifest Friends, Mentors & Incredible Relationships w/Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd Pt 2
But the truth is, like, just accept people for who they are. Yeah. Like, that's their frequency. Don't change them.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Manifest Friends, Mentors & Incredible Relationships w/Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd Pt 2
I went through some version of like an ego death. And now I'm like, let's go. Let's lead with love. I'm not leading with fear. Not gonna lead with insecurity. Not gonna lead with like, what's someone gonna think about me? I do not care. Genuinely. And I can say that sincerely. I think you can tell I don't bullshit you. Like you get what you get with me. And I wasn't there a year ago.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Manifest Friends, Mentors & Incredible Relationships w/Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd Pt 2
I I I Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Manifest Friends, Mentors & Incredible Relationships w/Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd Pt 2
Well, thank you for acknowledging that. And you said a very important word, which was team. And I've got to say for anybody listening, like the team you're surrounded with is really where the magic is, right? Like the team is everything. So just like deeply, deeply grateful and indebted to our team past, present, and I know future.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Manifest Friends, Mentors & Incredible Relationships w/Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd Pt 2
I will share one story of something that changed my life in terms of a success story. This is so wild. And a lot of people, if you're not... If you're not a believer, you should probably go take a coffee break because you're going to think this is a little abstract and out there, but I promise you it's the truth.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Manifest Friends, Mentors & Incredible Relationships w/Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd Pt 2
After I had my first son, Bobby, my husband, he was raised by his grandfather, who was a deeply, deeply influential person in my life too. He was one of the only people that really believed in me and supported me through the departure of Tinder and the building of Bumble. And he was just this figure of like strength. And he was really the man in the arena. It was his favorite quote.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Manifest Friends, Mentors & Incredible Relationships w/Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd Pt 2
He had it framed everywhere. An impressive, amazing man who defeated all the odds. So I got pregnant at 29. My husband and I got pregnant with our first child when I was 29. And we found out it was a boy and we knew immediately we're going to name him Bobby Lee after granddaddy who was Bobby Lee. This is all relevant to answering your question I'm setting at the stage.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Manifest Friends, Mentors & Incredible Relationships w/Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd Pt 2
And so we have our beautiful baby boy. But very unfortunately, granddaddy had gotten very, very ill just weeks prior. And he was hanging on for dear life just to make it to see this baby boy be born. And as fate would have it, it was not my due date. Our son, Bobby Lee, was born on granddaddy's birthday, December the 9th. And we named him Bobby Lee II.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Manifest Friends, Mentors & Incredible Relationships w/Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd Pt 2
And I've never met anyone named Bobby Lee before. It's kind of a strange, like it's a, it's not like, it's not Johnny. It's like a kind of, you know, a unique name, like the double pairing of these names. And this is relevant because this answers your question. So after I had our son, granddaddy tragically was able to see him just on FaceTime.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Manifest Friends, Mentors & Incredible Relationships w/Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd Pt 2
He said, happy birthday, kind of said, I give you my life. And after that, he really never spoke again and he passed. So five days after Bobby's born, it's granddaddy's, we're getting ready to like prepare for granddaddy's funeral, Bobby Lee, the first funeral. And I woke up that morning about to fly to the funeral with a really crazy headache. Like I've never had a headache like this.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Manifest Friends, Mentors & Incredible Relationships w/Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd Pt 2
I thought something's not right. So I text the doctor, they say, lay down, it's hormones, take a nap. I looked in the mirror and I was a balloon. I was like, what has happened to me? And so I thought to check my blood pressure because I had read an article about a woman who swole and got a headache and ended up with a stroke and had something called postpartum preeclampsia.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Manifest Friends, Mentors & Incredible Relationships w/Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd Pt 2
And I said, God, I better check my blood pressure. Lo and behold, my blood pressure was something like 180 over 125 or 130. It was very, very serious. So the doctor said, get to the hospital immediately. So here I am. I'm leaving my newborn child at home, not alone, thank God, obviously.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Manifest Friends, Mentors & Incredible Relationships w/Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd Pt 2
And my husband has to leave me at the hospital to go deliver the eulogy at a thousand person funeral or however many people were there. So I'm in this bed in the hospital. They cannot get my blood pressure down. I have very, it's called help syndrome. I have help syndrome. Your liver enzymes are out of control. Your blood pressure is out of control and it is fatal. You can die from this.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Manifest Friends, Mentors & Incredible Relationships w/Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd Pt 2
And very tragically, it is a huge portion of maternal deaths, preeclampsia and post preeclampsia. So here I am, I'm laying in the dark. They put you in the dark on something called a magnesium drip. And I literally think, oh, this is as bad as it gets. You're not with your new baby. You're being told we're gonna do our best, but no certainty that you're gonna get better, which is the truth.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Manifest Friends, Mentors & Incredible Relationships w/Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd Pt 2
No one's telling you you're gonna be okay, because they don't know. They're gonna do their best. And your husband is at the funeral of the one man that has been like an inspiration to you. And I thought, okay, this is it. This is literally hell on earth. And shortly thereafter, a woman walks in the room. She's a nurse at the hospital and it's dark, but she comes in and she grabs my hand.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Manifest Friends, Mentors & Incredible Relationships w/Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd Pt 2
I can see her and I can hear her. She turns the lights on and she says, hi, sweetheart. And she says, you're Whitney from Bumble, right? And I think, oh God, like not now. I can't give jobs right now. Like I, you know, someone's nephew wants a job at Bumble all the time. And I'm like, this is not the time I'm dying. Like, can we save this for another day?
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Manifest Friends, Mentors & Incredible Relationships w/Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd Pt 2
And she pretty quickly after she tells me, listen, I know I'm violating HIPAA. It's my last day at the hospital. I've been here for 35 years. I had to come see you. The nurses were talking about you back in the nurse station that the Bumble founder was here. And I didn't care if I got in trouble. I came to talk to you. She said, first of all, you're going to be okay, sweetheart.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Manifest Friends, Mentors & Incredible Relationships w/Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd Pt 2
She grabbed my hand. That was the first time someone told me I'd be okay. And she said, I had to come tell you something. She said, I was in a toxic marriage for a very long time. And I read about you. And I read about what you did with Bumble and it gave me the courage to leave my marriage. And once I had rebuilt my strength and my self-confidence, I downloaded Bumble because of you.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Manifest Friends, Mentors & Incredible Relationships w/Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd Pt 2
And I've never met anyone with my fiance's name. And he is the love of my life and he is wonderful. And I saw that your baby's name is Bobby Lee because they write it on the wall outside the hospital room when you're a new mom with a baby. She said, that's his name. She said, I met Bobby Lee on Bumble after an abusive marriage, which is basically my whole story. It was my whole purpose.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Manifest Friends, Mentors & Incredible Relationships w/Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd Pt 2
And it was Bobby Lee's funeral and baby Bobby Lee was at home. And this woman's life had been enhanced by a man named Bobby Lee that she met on Bumble. So if that's not the universe telling you that, you know, check, the intention was pure and good. I don't know what else is.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Manifest Friends, Mentors & Incredible Relationships w/Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd Pt 2
So that's the power of what this has been for me. That story is exactly a through line of this whole journey. And I think we all can connect with these synchronicities in the world, right? If we trust and believe in it. And that's just one example.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Manifest Friends, Mentors & Incredible Relationships w/Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd Pt 2
That's right. And your worst days can also be little cracks of light. Yeah. Right? That was the worst day ever, hands down. But it ended up being... pretty profound, right? That experience was profound. So I think we have to fall down to learn the lesson or see the good.
The Jamie Kern Lima Show
How to Manifest Friends, Mentors & Incredible Relationships w/Bumble Founder Whitney Wolfe Herd Pt 2
Definitely. I went home and cried after the IPO.