Michaela
Appearances
NerdWallet's Smart Money Podcast
How to Get Your Finances Ready for a Crisis and Tackle Debt Smarter
I love Jersey, but I also am interested in going to maybe D.C. or Maryland. I know that's also equally expensive, so I know for sure my rent would be more.
NerdWallet's Smart Money Podcast
How to Get Your Finances Ready for a Crisis and Tackle Debt Smarter
That's true. Yeah, I 100% agree.
NerdWallet's Smart Money Podcast
How to Get Your Finances Ready for a Crisis and Tackle Debt Smarter
Definitely want to focus a lot on paying off my debt. I feel like once that's paid off, it's going to be a great help and a sigh of relief is that I can put more into my retirement and investing. I don't really see the point of investing when I still have a lot of debt left over.
NerdWallet's Smart Money Podcast
How to Get Your Finances Ready for a Crisis and Tackle Debt Smarter
So I do currently have a Chase credit card debt, but I'm not really too stressed about that because I have like maybe a thousand left and I should be at zero at the end of the first quarter.
NerdWallet's Smart Money Podcast
How to Get Your Finances Ready for a Crisis and Tackle Debt Smarter
Yes. I do have a car note and that's like 20 K.
NerdWallet's Smart Money Podcast
How to Get Your Finances Ready for a Crisis and Tackle Debt Smarter
Yes.
NerdWallet's Smart Money Podcast
How to Get Your Finances Ready for a Crisis and Tackle Debt Smarter
That, I believe it's 9%. And I messed up because I didn't know anything about cars. So when I went to get my car, I actually got a loan. That's where the personal loan debt comes in, thinking that I was going to use that money to pay for the car. But the car dealership made me go through their process. So I ended up going through them. So that's how I got the car note and the personal loan.
NerdWallet's Smart Money Podcast
How to Get Your Finances Ready for a Crisis and Tackle Debt Smarter
Exactly.
NerdWallet's Smart Money Podcast
How to Get Your Finances Ready for a Crisis and Tackle Debt Smarter
Absolutely.
NerdWallet's Smart Money Podcast
How to Get Your Finances Ready for a Crisis and Tackle Debt Smarter
I think the APR is 11%.
NerdWallet's Smart Money Podcast
How to Get Your Finances Ready for a Crisis and Tackle Debt Smarter
The balance, it's $13,000.
NerdWallet's Smart Money Podcast
How to Get Your Finances Ready for a Crisis and Tackle Debt Smarter
I believe maybe it would be the snowball method. I've started aggressively paying off the Chase credit card.
NerdWallet's Smart Money Podcast
How to Get Your Finances Ready for a Crisis and Tackle Debt Smarter
Yes.
NerdWallet's Smart Money Podcast
How to Get Your Finances Ready for a Crisis and Tackle Debt Smarter
It has.
NerdWallet's Smart Money Podcast
How to Get Your Finances Ready for a Crisis and Tackle Debt Smarter
Yes, exactly.
NerdWallet's Smart Money Podcast
How to Get Your Finances Ready for a Crisis and Tackle Debt Smarter
I do have an emergency fund, but it's only funded for one month currently.
NerdWallet's Smart Money Podcast
How to Get Your Finances Ready for a Crisis and Tackle Debt Smarter
Zero. Zero dollars.
NerdWallet's Smart Money Podcast
How to Get Your Finances Ready for a Crisis and Tackle Debt Smarter
Thank you. I do have a 401k and a simple IRA and a Roth IRA.
NerdWallet's Smart Money Podcast
How to Get Your Finances Ready for a Crisis and Tackle Debt Smarter
The simple IRA, I believe around 3k. The 401k, I believe is around 5 or 6k. The Roth IRA, I believe it's just 200.
NerdWallet's Smart Money Podcast
How to Get Your Finances Ready for a Crisis and Tackle Debt Smarter
Right now, honestly, I haven't been aggressively saving because I'm aggressively paying off the debt. But I do put aside, I think it's 10% out of my paycheck automatically goes into a savings account. I won't lie, sometimes I do touch it.
NerdWallet's Smart Money Podcast
How to Get Your Finances Ready for a Crisis and Tackle Debt Smarter
Gotcha. Thank you so much. That is really good advice.
NerdWallet's Smart Money Podcast
How to Get Your Finances Ready for a Crisis and Tackle Debt Smarter
It's really high. It's like $29,000.
NerdWallet's Smart Money Podcast
How to Get Your Finances Ready for a Crisis and Tackle Debt Smarter
Honestly, I'm not too versed on the whole investing category. I'm kind of just picking up tips as I go, just guessing. I do just randomly pick stocks or whatever I tend to use. I just buy one share, but I'm not really sure as to what to do with that.
NerdWallet's Smart Money Podcast
How to Get Your Finances Ready for a Crisis and Tackle Debt Smarter
Yes, I am.
NerdWallet's Smart Money Podcast
How to Get Your Finances Ready for a Crisis and Tackle Debt Smarter
So everything is infidelity, which makes it a lot easier to track everything. In terms of allocating money, I really haven't allocated anything towards my Roth IRA or my simple IRA. In terms of the 401k, I think I've been doing 8%. I'm not sure if that's what I should be doing for my age, but that's what I've been doing.
NerdWallet's Smart Money Podcast
How to Get Your Finances Ready for a Crisis and Tackle Debt Smarter
Right now, it's sort of just in the background. I'm not really sure what to do with it, honestly.
NerdWallet's Smart Money Podcast
How to Get Your Finances Ready for a Crisis and Tackle Debt Smarter
I would love to try a different one because I do feel very limited because everything is allocated for and like I said, if something was to happen or I want to go somewhere in the middle of the month, I kind of deprive myself of it because it was not allocated prior.
NerdWallet's Smart Money Podcast
How to Get Your Finances Ready for a Crisis and Tackle Debt Smarter
I do want to, but at the same time, my debt.
NerdWallet's Smart Money Podcast
How to Get Your Finances Ready for a Crisis and Tackle Debt Smarter
It's about $900.
NerdWallet's Smart Money Podcast
How to Get Your Finances Ready for a Crisis and Tackle Debt Smarter
It is.
NerdWallet's Smart Money Podcast
How to Get Your Finances Ready for a Crisis and Tackle Debt Smarter
That was actually a question I had for you guys. Should I put it into savings or should I put that, say, in my $100 into my car note or the personal loan?
NerdWallet's Smart Money Podcast
How to Get Your Finances Ready for a Crisis and Tackle Debt Smarter
I think I just need to get out of the mindset that it's either or and realize that I can do all at the same time.
NerdWallet's Smart Money Podcast
How to Get Your Finances Ready for a Crisis and Tackle Debt Smarter
I feel a lot better, more confident and secure in the decisions that I've been making. I feel like I'm definitely going to think a little bit harder and longer about my budgeting method, my retirement and what I want to do in terms of the Roth IRA and the 401k and just overall being okay with where I'm at right now and knowing that there's room for growth and I'm on the right path.
NerdWallet's Smart Money Podcast
How to Get Your Finances Ready for a Crisis and Tackle Debt Smarter
Thank you. That means a lot.
NerdWallet's Smart Money Podcast
How to Get Your Finances Ready for a Crisis and Tackle Debt Smarter
Thank you for having me.
NerdWallet's Smart Money Podcast
How to Get Your Finances Ready for a Crisis and Tackle Debt Smarter
Honestly, I think I'm doing pretty well compared to how I was doing a couple of years ago. I feel like now I finally have a stable job. So that definitely helps a lot.
NerdWallet's Smart Money Podcast
How to Get Your Finances Ready for a Crisis and Tackle Debt Smarter
I'm a paralegal.
NerdWallet's Smart Money Podcast
How to Get Your Finances Ready for a Crisis and Tackle Debt Smarter
Yes, it definitely does.
NerdWallet's Smart Money Podcast
How to Get Your Finances Ready for a Crisis and Tackle Debt Smarter
$55,000 a year.
NerdWallet's Smart Money Podcast
How to Get Your Finances Ready for a Crisis and Tackle Debt Smarter
Right now I do have a roommate. So rent is split in half, which I absolutely love because paying full rent in Jersey is just insane. So rent is split in half, but everything else is solely on me.
NerdWallet's Smart Money Podcast
How to Get Your Finances Ready for a Crisis and Tackle Debt Smarter
I do practice a zero-based budget right now, so I don't really have quote-unquote fun money. Everything is allocated to something. If I do have plans with friends, then it would have to be allocated at the beginning of the month. If it's not, then I probably won't go.
NerdWallet's Smart Money Podcast
How to Get Your Finances Ready for a Crisis and Tackle Debt Smarter
I do, 100%.
NerdWallet's Smart Money Podcast
How to Get Your Finances Ready for a Crisis and Tackle Debt Smarter
I would very much hope to be out of debt. I think realistically, I would still have my student loans because I do plan to return back to school this year. So everything else, though, I would like to believe that would be paid off.
The Game with Alex Hormozi
The Fastest Way to Grow Is Simpler Than You Think | Ep 887
So my name is Michaela. We have a sales agency that sells photographic art and albums to consumers on behalf of photographers. Right this past year, we did just under two million and I need to be at five the end of this year.
The Game with Alex Hormozi
The Fastest Way to Grow Is Simpler Than You Think | Ep 887
Or else. And what's stopping me is definitely just advertising and marketing. We haven't done anything up until this point. Our business evolved from selling courses. So selling courses and then people didn't want to implement or do the sales appointments themselves. So I built an agency to do it for them. Yesterday, you mentioned the plumber situation, right?
The Game with Alex Hormozi
The Fastest Way to Grow Is Simpler Than You Think | Ep 887
So my question is right now, we, so I have my course that basically teaches photographers how to run a print driven business and do what we do. But it was also like a really great funnel strategy for this business.
The Game with Alex Hormozi
The Fastest Way to Grow Is Simpler Than You Think | Ep 887
So I'm not sure whether to use that as a downsell for if they don't qualify for our partnership program to put them in the course first or to pull it from behind the paywall and turn it into just free content to be top of funnel.
The Game with Alex Hormozi
The Fastest Way to Grow Is Simpler Than You Think | Ep 887
Like less than $10,000 a year.
The Game with Alex Hormozi
The Fastest Way to Grow Is Simpler Than You Think | Ep 887
Yes. Thank you.
The Glenn Beck Program
NSA Officials Used Classified Chat to Talk Smut on YOUR Dime | Guests: Rep. Riley Moore & Rep. Aaron Bean | 2/25/25
Little Baby Sparrow update. In a nutshell, if you haven't heard the full story of Baby Sparrow, you can go to glenbeck.com slash savebabysparrow. But in a nutshell, our State Department attempted to sweep the life of a little girl under the rug to cover up for their botched attempt at peace in Afghanistan.
The Glenn Beck Program
NSA Officials Used Classified Chat to Talk Smut on YOUR Dime | Guests: Rep. Riley Moore & Rep. Aaron Bean | 2/25/25
Yes, so she was recovered by our soldiers during a mission in Afghanistan when her parents, biological parents, who were likely foreign fighters, were killed. Then two Americans... Not just killed. Yes.
The Glenn Beck Program
NSA Officials Used Classified Chat to Talk Smut on YOUR Dime | Guests: Rep. Riley Moore & Rep. Aaron Bean | 2/25/25
Yes.
The Glenn Beck Program
NSA Officials Used Classified Chat to Talk Smut on YOUR Dime | Guests: Rep. Riley Moore & Rep. Aaron Bean | 2/25/25
No. It was a fight to the death against our soldiers. Right. And then our soldiers decided to save the baby of their enemies. And then two American parents decided to step up and adopt her to ensure her survival. Because after the explosion of the IED, she had a lot of medical needs. I mean, she was six weeks old at this point.
The Glenn Beck Program
NSA Officials Used Classified Chat to Talk Smut on YOUR Dime | Guests: Rep. Riley Moore & Rep. Aaron Bean | 2/25/25
They did. They tried to kill her.
The Glenn Beck Program
NSA Officials Used Classified Chat to Talk Smut on YOUR Dime | Guests: Rep. Riley Moore & Rep. Aaron Bean | 2/25/25
Yes. So there's a battle for her custody. It's important to understand why. It's because her mere existence would...
The Glenn Beck Program
NSA Officials Used Classified Chat to Talk Smut on YOUR Dime | Guests: Rep. Riley Moore & Rep. Aaron Bean | 2/25/25
show that the peace agreement that we made which with afghanistan which stipulated there were no foreign fighters in afghanistan well she's the daughter of a foreign fighter thus the state department finds her existence inconvenient right she has to be afghani so she has to go back to afghanistan and so today in virginia where her american parents adopted her
The Glenn Beck Program
NSA Officials Used Classified Chat to Talk Smut on YOUR Dime | Guests: Rep. Riley Moore & Rep. Aaron Bean | 2/25/25
She is facing a case where if it goes the wrong way, she is potentially ripped from her American family who loves her, who have been with her for multiple years, raising her, helping to recuperate from all the trauma she's experienced. She's ripped from them. She's sent to Afghanistan with two children.
The Glenn Beck Program
NSA Officials Used Classified Chat to Talk Smut on YOUR Dime | Guests: Rep. Riley Moore & Rep. Aaron Bean | 2/25/25
likely non-relative unvetted potentially taliban linked claimants back to a place where she has where her family is here so that's on the line today right now in the supreme court of virginia
The Glenn Beck Program
NSA Officials Used Classified Chat to Talk Smut on YOUR Dime | Guests: Rep. Riley Moore & Rep. Aaron Bean | 2/25/25
If you'd like a little bit of good news on this front about the power of what our audience is doing, I've been listening. I think some good news is in order for all of us, perhaps. Yeah. Some good news is that I believe our audience is not going to let Baby Sparrow be sent back to Afghanistan. And here's just a little glimmer of hope.
The Glenn Beck Program
NSA Officials Used Classified Chat to Talk Smut on YOUR Dime | Guests: Rep. Riley Moore & Rep. Aaron Bean | 2/25/25
There's a lot of good news that is coming that we can't talk about yet. But I can tell you a little bit. There is a woman who's a longstanding bureaucrat in D.C. She was instrumental.
The Glenn Beck Program
NSA Officials Used Classified Chat to Talk Smut on YOUR Dime | Guests: Rep. Riley Moore & Rep. Aaron Bean | 2/25/25
donna welton was instrumental in placing baby sparrow with these unvetted claimants in afghanistan interesting timing she has decided to let me say it correctly conclude her tenure in advance of eminent retirement in the last few days oh my gosh so i believe this timing has something to do with the fact that our audience has been sharing this story people like sean ryan have gone out and shared this story naming her by name and we can't say for sure but i have a hunch that
The Glenn Beck Program
NSA Officials Used Classified Chat to Talk Smut on YOUR Dime | Guests: Rep. Riley Moore & Rep. Aaron Bean | 2/25/25
The power of everyone sharing her story and getting involved is already putting pressure in the right places. And the right people are starting to bow out. And hopefully that will mean this is just the beginning of miracles for Baby Sparrow.
The Glenn Beck Program
NSA Officials Used Classified Chat to Talk Smut on YOUR Dime | Guests: Rep. Riley Moore & Rep. Aaron Bean | 2/25/25
Are you a door kicker in this position?
The Oprah Podcast
Oprah and Dr. Ania Jastreboff on How People Treat You Differently After Weight Loss
Yeah.
The Oprah Podcast
Oprah and Dr. Ania Jastreboff on How People Treat You Differently After Weight Loss
Mm-hmm.
The Oprah Podcast
Oprah and Dr. Ania Jastreboff on How People Treat You Differently After Weight Loss
We had a surgical way, but not a medical way. medical way.
The Oprah Podcast
Oprah and Dr. Ania Jastreboff on How People Treat You Differently After Weight Loss
Yeah.
The Oprah Podcast
Oprah and Dr. Ania Jastreboff on How People Treat You Differently After Weight Loss
Yes. Wow.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
Oh, thank God. I swear to God. I literally, I was editing that YouTube video and I was like, what the heck? And I realized it after when we were like doing our stills, I like held the phone up and I was like, Oh,
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
Especially politics. Yeah. So it's like... It's like, well, didn't you... Don't you know that blah, blah, blah, blah, blah does this and that and that? And it's like, no, but I guess I'll look into it. Thank you. Thank you for sharing. Right. Done. Yeah. Like, oh, that's great. Something for me to consider. Thanks for sharing. Done.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
It's so hard to do, but it works. I love that. It works. There is another comment after that. Don't forget she went twice with her mother and became so upset she cried. Then she went alone and found a dress.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
That's something I was going to say. I'm like... The one time you go without her, you find the dress. No, you were just so stressed and miserable and unhappy. You weren't even opening your heart for the right dress. It wasn't a fun experience. You didn't feel good about yourself or the dresses. It's not a coincidence.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
Yeah, I know. I wonder. And this is where a therapist chime in. Right. I wonder if you like, especially because, like, she's probably going to be at the wedding. She's going to see her in the dress. And kind of already like anticipating her reaction. It's like you almost want to tell her and like draw a boundary where it's like, hey, I picked my dress. I'm really excited about it.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
If you don't say anything positive, like I'm not going to engage with you. Right. Like I don't want you in the bridal suite then getting ready with me. Like you almost set the boundary because someone like that that didn't have a say in the dress you picked and was excluded, air quotes, like in her eyes, she's going to be like, well, that's not what I would have gone with.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
it's okay right you already can anticipate those comments as a further form of punishment so it's like I'd be curious from a therapist point of view and like using therapy talk like what would be a good way to kind of avoid any of that with this woman yeah like do you say something or do you just gray rock it out yeah
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
I'm not going to go... Obviously, you've seen the original Broadway.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
I think that's why a lot of people have moved towards a low pain. Yeah. Because it's like, it's kind of this fine line of like doing what is going to make you happy and toting that line. And then what's going to make other people happy and not piss other people off and not have drama. And it's like, This is about you guys, the couple.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
But a lot of us have to go through these hoops and hurdles of avoiding drama and doing extensive seating charts to make sure people avoid each other. And it is overwhelming and exhausting and very unfair to put on the two people that should be celebrating. Yeah, absolutely. Suck it up. If you can't be there happy, supportive, don't come. Truly, it's not. Don't. Don't. I don't want you there.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
You're going to be a little sour puss. Nope. It's simply not about you. It's simply not. It's not. And I've got one more wedding story that I'm like... Wait, perfect. We're going to roll with this wedding stuff. I'm like... I'm getting into my planning now, too, because I'm like, okay, wait. Like, I'm... You guys, I'm only... I'm less than a year out. I have my date, September 27th. That's crazy.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
Oh my God. And so I'm like, okay, I'm like, I haven't got to start planning now. Wedding planning is crazy. And then you do this podcast and you hear stories so often about weddings.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
So I've got a wedding theme coming at the top of the year as I get more into it. But I'm like, I'm just in my wedding story phase right now. Yeah. And then if you have any wedding stories, let us know. Hey. I'm sure. I'm sure I'm going to have a couple. Just wait. So this is coming from Am I the Asshole?
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
Titled, Am I the Asshole for still going to my sister's wedding after my husband canceled my plane ticket?
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
Here's the situation. My husband, 36, and I, 30, have three kids, two, four, and seven. I'm a stay-at-home mom full-time, and I take care of the kids while my husband works full-time. My sister's wedding was last week. We live hours away, which is an issue for my husband. When we first got the invite, he told me he wasn't going, that he will stay for the kids, and suggested that I do the same.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
Since the wedding doesn't allow kids and my husband doesn't want to hire a babysitter after the one we had robbed us, we had gone back and forth on this. But I insisted on going since that's my only sister and I want to attend what might be a once-in-a-lifetime event for her. He chuckled at my statement, and then we stopped talking about it.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
As the wedding was approaching, he brought it up and told me to miss it and stay with the kids. I suggested that since no babysitters were allowed, then I could get my friend to stay with the kids, but again, he refused. I ignored him, spoke to my friend who agreed to watch the kids, and booked a ticket to travel to my sister's town in time.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
My husband found out and went on about how he had work and that the most logical solution is that I stay home with the kids and let him make his living. I told him that I already took care of the kids and they'll stay with my friend. Honestly, I grew impatient. The day of my flight, I dropped the kids off at my friend's place and then headed to the airport.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
I think everyone needs to. It is honestly so, so well done. It's so fun.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
I was upset, but still insisted on going. So I went home and got into my car and drove four hours to get to the town. At 5 p.m., my husband called and was freaking out on me, asking where I was. I told him I made it to my sister's town, and he blew up, saying I wasn't supposed to go. Even said he canceled my ticket to get me to stay. He demanded I return, but I said not until the wedding is over.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
He called me horrible, a neglectful mom, then had his mom scold me and accuse me of abandoning my own children. There was a huge argument that ensued when I returned home and my husband kept on saying I was horrible to leave the kids and to ignore him like that and eventually do what I wanted. He's giving me the silent treatment as of now and I can no longer take it.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
I felt guilty and did not enjoy the wedding at all. Was I wrong for still going?
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
I loved it. And I just saw the Broadway musical like a month ago. Oh, no way. Yeah. So for me, it was like it was so fresh. Yeah. And I was like, wait, this is... It's incredible. I love Broadway. I... I'm like considering going to New York because I have like a free flight that I need to use. And I'm like, maybe I'll go to New York by myself and just go see some musicals.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
I'm just I'm beyond baffled. I'm so one. I am so, so happy and proud of her to go through that. Right. You're literally being like turned away at the airport. Oh, yeah. To show up and find out that he canceled your flight. Hell no. Hell no. And what a good sister. Like she drove four hours versus just being like defeated.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
What an amazing, strong person, like standing up for herself and still doing this, holding her guns, even after being called all these terrible names and all of this shit. Insanely strong. So happy for her. So proud of her. And it sucks that she didn't have a good time. But this guy is a controlling, crazy person. You gotta run. Calling her a neglectful parent? You abandoned your children?
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
She left the house for one day, for one night. They're not attached to the umbilical cord anymore. She could have been back sooner if she had been able to take a flight. True. Would have been more efficient. Way more efficient. Would have been able to spend more time at home. Safer for her too. Yeah. Safer. Yeah. Flying is safer than cars.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
Dude, this is such a tangent. I have a really big fear of getting hit by a car. And my new fear is. If you are like your car's parked, but you have to walk around like in front of it to get in and there's cars coming because you're parked on that side of the street. Yeah. My fear is that someone on driving rear ends my car while I'm walking in front of it. And then I get like dominoed. Bam.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
I think about it every time. I'm also. Yeah. I need therapy. That sounds. That won't happen.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
Really proud of her. And just like this is this is abuse.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
What's wrong with a babysitter? And then what's wrong with the friend? Nothing. You just want your wife completely under your thumb and control forever.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
No way. No way. So top comment on this financial abuse. Question mark. Yep. Isolating you from a loved one. Yep. Controlling behavior. Yep. Not the asshole. And please leave the asshole. He should be required to give you child support and alimony. You are not neglectful. Your kids were taken care of. OP responds, thank you so much.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
The childcare arrangement issue has been making my life 10 times harder. After that babysitter robbed us, my husband decided that no babysitter is allowed in our home anymore. I disagreed because of how illogical his decision was. And now look at how much we're struggling. I'm struggling, actually, without outside help. Thank God for my friend. She's like a sister to me.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
And so someone quotes the after the babysitter robbed us part. Do you have confirmation that the babysitter actually robbed you? All right, turn this up. Let's turn this up. Based on how manipulative he is canceling your ticket, I wouldn't put it past him to frame your babysitter as an excuse to never hire one again so that he can keep you trapped in your home.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
I feel like when I've been a nanny and babysitter, like I don't really, I don't look into people's stuff.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
Like I swear to God, I have a black hole following me. So like anything's missing. I'm like, nah, the hole got it.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
My claw clips? No, I don't know where they went. My panda coin? Gone. A bracelet Justin got me? Gone. I'm like, where the fuck did it go? Yeah. Where the fuck did it go? So, OP does have a couple little quips here. Info. My husband dislikes my sister, if it's relevant.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
That. He dislikes everyone. Fork found in kitchen. Because he wants you to be under his control. Yeah. He doesn't want you to have friends. I'm surprised you can even have a friend. Yeah. Update. So a lot of people on here brought up the possibility of my husband lying about the robbery that happened months ago and accusing the babysitter of stealing just so I can't hire any other babysitters.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
He was the one who discovered the robbery. I never saw or talked to her after he kicked her out. Upon reading the comments, I'm now suspecting that he made up the whole thing. I'm going to contact the babysitter to get the whole story. Hopefully I'm wrong, but I will talk to her and see if her story contradicts his in any way. I'll keep you updated.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
Did she? Did she? So we have a couple of other comments from OP just kind of further elaborating on him and things like that before we continue.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
Yeah. So OP is like responding to this comment. Not the asshole. He's awful. It's ridiculous to suggest you missed the wedding as there were obviously child care solutions and to cancel the ticket is super abusive. I can't see how this doesn't cause massive damage to your relationship. He's ridiculously controlling. OP.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
The thing is, I had already suggested other solutions, but he was dead set on not letting me go. I ignored him because I was at my wit's end and he wouldn't want it any other way. I'm just like, I can't imagine. Even imagining someone controlling me like that and suffocating me so much, I feel claustrophobic thinking about it.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
There is a comment from OP that being called names is not a new thing. He has called me names before, but to say that I'm a neglectful mom, that stings hard.
Two Hot Takes
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repair that yeah and the fact that his mom is getting involved too this another flying monkey another flying monkey like this is not your relationship ma'am yeah oh this is your baby boy get the fuck out of my life oh my god keep to yourself you can talk to your son if he wants to vent to you that's fine and dandy but don't you dare come at me and don't you dare come at me saying i'm a bad mom you know who's a bad mom you because you raised this controlling little asshole
Two Hot Takes
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I'm so upset for her. Sorry, I feel like I popped off there really hard. No, you should, and it was deserved. Update.
Two Hot Takes
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I contacted the babysitter via social media. I sent her a DM telling her who I was and mentioning the incident that happened at our home. I didn't think she'd respond given that it's been over seven months since she left us, but I was surprised when she responded in two hours time. I again mentioned the incident to her and asked if she could explain to me what happened.
Two Hot Takes
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That's how I feel about some of the smut shapeshifter books I read. And like, I shouldn't tell people about those.
Two Hot Takes
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She sent me a long wall of text swearing she never took anything from our home and that my husband came home and was lashing out at her and the kids for no reason. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. She said he didn't say anything, but his looks made her uncomfortable. She also said she was willing to let it go until she saw that he started leaving her texts days later, demanding she responded to him.
Two Hot Takes
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Then, the day he accused her of the robbery, he just lashed out at her, criticizing her work, and then told her to leave and not come back. She said he didn't accuse her of anything being stolen, just lashed out and told her to leave.
Two Hot Takes
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Well, I also find it a red flag that OP had to DM her versus having her number.
Two Hot Takes
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That's another layer of the control there. Like, he was the point of contact for the babysitter.
Two Hot Takes
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So it was like, hey, honey, I got to go to Target. Can you text the babysitter? It was another middleman, which shouldn't have even been a thing, but because he wanted the control.
Two Hot Takes
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Yeah. The update goes on to say, I couldn't wrap my head around this. I just, I really don't know what to say. Basically, she was saying he tried to hit on her, but then she said she wasn't sure if it was an accident. Then he just all of a sudden came home one day and lashed out, then told her to leave. I can't make sense of any of it.
Two Hot Takes
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He told her to leave because she wasn't reciprocating his advances.
Two Hot Takes
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Disgusting. I went to try to speak to him on that, but he kept blocking my attempts to discuss it. So I blew up, showed him what the babysitter sent me, and he remained calm, which is completely out of character for him. Ugh. He kept repeating the line, she's lying to you. Well, I absolutely lost it on him.
Two Hot Takes
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I threatened to take the kids and go stay with my friend, which is what I'm gonna do today after he leaves the house. Since he said that, I can't do that. Then I'm just waiting until he's out. He kept calling me crazy to believe some kid's story over his and insisted that I'm looking to dig up dirt to start a fight. I refused to continue fighting. I just kept my distance from him.
Two Hot Takes
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This is just horrible. I did not see this coming. And I feel like a cold wave just hit me. And I don't know what to say about this. And worst of all is that I have no evidence or proof. I'm going to be taking some space from him for now until I clear my mind and think of what I'm going to do moving forward.
Two Hot Takes
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Okay. So hi, guys. I'm Morgan, by the way. This is two hot takes if you're new. I'm Mikayla. Hi. Hi. So the theme Mikayla came up with is like, Genuinely self-concerned or self-centered.
Two Hot Takes
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I have faith in her. Well, this post is two years old. Oh, oh my God. We don't have any more updates. Oh no. There is no comments on OP's account that have since come up. No other posts, no comments on other posts and other subs or anything. So I'm hoping OP is out there, forgot about the account, forgot about the post, was dealing with life. Here's this and updates us.
Two Hot Takes
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I would love to get a happy ending on this and just make sure she's okay because this is insane behavior and not something anyone should have to deal with.
Two Hot Takes
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Yeah. And I do get that vibe just based on the last comments OP did post. Like not having proof and stuff.
Two Hot Takes
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And so did say like, I'm too overwhelmed right now, but I'll make sure to store all the messages. So all the messages from him, all the messages from the mom, messages from the babysitter. So... There is something. Yeah.
Two Hot Takes
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And then there's another comment where OP is just like, I fully believe and I'm now convinced that the reason he canceled the plane ticket and went ballistic when I attended the wedding is because he hates my sister. He calls her a slut on the regular and yells at me about how she sleeps around, which is none of his fucking business.
Two Hot Takes
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I'm just so mad at myself for letting him get this far in humiliating me and badmouthing my family while I stood there and took it. I was an idiot. No, you weren't. Then he should be happy she's getting married if he's so bothered by a woman having fun. I wouldn't be surprised if he's made passes at the sister and just hates her because she didn't engage.
Two Hot Takes
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Yeah. Probably he just hates women and needs to be in a superior position and control. Yeah. Yeah. She's left him, everybody. She's... That's... Yeah, but if you're out there, let us know. Let us know. All the love to you. Reddit and TikTok have a weird way of showing up on people's For You pages. Yeah. The amount of times that people are like, I came across my story being read on a TikTok. Right.
Two Hot Takes
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It could happen, and we could get an update, so everyone just... Manifest that OP's out there and living her best life. And pain and suffering for the man. And getting that alimony she so heartedly deserves. Yeah. Oh, my God. Insanity.
Two Hot Takes
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I know. I know. And this next one, I think it's also...
Two Hot Takes
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insanity oh god self-absorbed motherfucker though i know absolutely i love the variety of self-absorbed people we're getting here do you have to like i'm like if you like controlling people that much is it like you must get off on it somehow right like you is it because you're so self-centered and the world needs to accommodate or revolve around you or is it like you just need
Two Hot Takes
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And I'd be very curious. I would bet. I would bet money that he's an only child and a mama's boy. Yeah. And mommy might have some.
Two Hot Takes
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so genuinely self-absorbed because a lot of these bitches do happen to be genuinely self-absorbed on these stories yeah and that's what a lot of these are and maybe we'll put a question mark at the end for the title and we'll kind of determine if it's they're self-centered self-absorbed or like something else is going on here because they're very confusing like I read a couple of these and I'm like
Two Hot Takes
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She's a little goofy, but you know, still over. Goofy. Okay, this next one. It's coming from our very own Too Hot Takes subreddit. Oh, love that. Three days old. Ooh. I'm 23 female and my boyfriend, 37 male. He demands a cut if my paintings get sold.
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Hi to Outtakes and Father Knows Something fam. I've been a longtime listener and I just want to say I learned so much from your podcast. But on to the issue. I'm a freelance artist from the Philippines. And let me tell you, art here barely gets importance since we are a third world country. And I completely understand given that people should prioritize necessities to live above all else.
Two Hot Takes
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So art as a full-time job is a pain here. Well, I've been in a relationship with my boyfriend since January 2024. We met at an art event and he messaged me after. And after a month of courting, we officially became a couple. On dates, I always insist on splitting the bill. But there comes a time where it's only him that pays and vice versa.
Two Hot Takes
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It doesn't bother me since I make money from freelance since getting my degree July 2023. My freelance jobs are architectural layout design and various forms of commissioned art, pencil drawings, painting, customized costumes, cosplaying, hair and makeup, etc. And since art is our common ground, he insisted on giving me museum-wrapped canvases so I can keep creating art pieces.
Two Hot Takes
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He has a small canvas business. At first, I didn't let him give them to me for free since it's kind of costly here. So I paid for them. But after a while, he insisted that they are free and I can just pay each if they get sold. So I agreed and considered it as help from him so I can develop my art more without spending too much given that freelancing art is not a stable field here.
Two Hot Takes
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Fast forward to November 2024. I've finished five paintings, three pieces of 2x3 feet and two pieces of 18x20 inches, and people have loved my style so far. And now I'm on my second art exhibit this upcoming December. And when I asked him how much each of the canvases are again so I can pay him if the paintings get sold, he told me the amount.
Two Hot Takes
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And I said I will pay him the exact amount when they get sold. But he then demanded that I should give him higher. that I should consider it his cut. I know he's been helping me, but I don't understand why I need to give him more than agreed since if they get sold, it'll be my first. I help him with his art too, like giving his art pieces titles and descriptions for countless exhibits catalogs.
Two Hot Takes
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helping him promote his art on social media and giving commissioned arts his way. And never did I ask for anything in return because I love him and want to help him. I know his status in life going in this relationship. He's 37. His older sister pays for his credit card, still living with his parents, full-time artist, which is not really stable as we are living in the Philippines.
Two Hot Takes
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He does end up with zero money once in a while, so it takes a month or two that we cannot go on dates unless I pay for both of us. So I wanted to understand why he wants a higher cut, more than we agreed upon. But when it's him that gets his pieces sold, I never ask for anything. Is it wrong to feel this way?
Two Hot Takes
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Am I being greedy given that I earn more on my freelancing jobs than his full-time artist job? For reference, he earns around $0 to $170 a month, while I earn $500 to $600. How can I tell him that I don't want to give him a higher cut since we had an agreement that I only pay him the canvas price?
Two Hot Takes
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I'm delaying talking to him since when I open up about things, even with the softest tone, he tends to cut me off and tells me he doesn't want to fight. He concludes that I want to fight when I attempt to communicate and just want to clear things up. I prioritize communication since I want to be transparent in this relationship to keep it healthy.
Two Hot Takes
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Also, I lend him money when he needs it, from my savings account, given he doesn't have one or any savings, and I never ask for interest, no matter how much of the money he asks for. Please help. P.S. Forgive me if my storytelling is confusing. It's the ADHD in me.
Two Hot Takes
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Yeah. And I get people are going to be like, they met when OP was 22, 23, not grooming, no issues, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. No, it is predatory if you exploit someone like this.
Two Hot Takes
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And then that would be one thing. Right. And then you add in the fact that she's helping him. Yeah. With way more. With way more. With way more. Borrowing him money. Yep. Doesn't ask for interest.
Two Hot Takes
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Yeah. No. And then his sister pays his credit card. Oh my gosh. You want to go tit for tat? Yeah. Here we go, sir. I'm going to start charging you fees for titles. I'm going to start charging you fees. When I send you a commission and you get a commission, guess what? I get a cut of that. You want to take cuts for services rendered? Yeah. Let's take cuts.
Two Hot Takes
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Let's go tit for tat and see who ends up in the green. Yeah.
Two Hot Takes
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Yeah. Well, that's the thing. Like I've had that happen with friends before where it's like, And I feel like everyone has.
Two Hot Takes
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I had this happen recently as well. You go to eat or like you're picking up a coffee for someone and it's like, oh, like, hey, do you want a coffee? I'm stopping on my way. Yeah. Yeah. I'd love something. And you just take care of it. Yeah. Because it's like sometimes it feels silly Venmo requesting five dollars or whatever. Of course. And then it reverses. And then it reverses. Yeah.
Two Hot Takes
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And you get the Venmo request. And it's like, This is why, like, sometimes what's that saying? It's like, no good deed goes unpunished. Oh, this is another wicked reference. Is that the saying? Yes, absolutely.
Two Hot Takes
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And so I'm just like, oh, like, you try to scratch each other's back. You try to be a good partner. And then you just get raked over the coals. And it's like, that's not what it should be. This is not a partnership. You're being used. And this isn't your person. And it makes you feel like,
Two Hot Takes
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I know. And that's how I feel about it, because like, obviously, you don't do something kind or With the expectation of getting something like praise or whatever. Yeah. Yeah, absolutely. But it just almost feels like that. It's like, wait. Yeah. I took care of you. Like, did that not mean anything? Like, why? Why don't you want to reciprocate the same kindness I showed you? Yeah.
Two Hot Takes
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And then that kind of goes to a deeper level of like, hey, maybe the friendship is unbalanced. It's just pointing out a crack. And I think that's what is happening here.
Two Hot Takes
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It's just pointing out how truly unbalanced the relationship is. And I get he's making less money. And I get, obviously, the canvas should be paid for. But he's going above and beyond now. She's already helping him with the money stuff.
Two Hot Takes
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Well, and I'm... Kind of confused to where it's like I'm making more money, but I'm doing all this freelance stuff. I'm hustling. I have all these jobs. I'm able to make more money because I'm putting in all this extra crazy work. Yeah. Versus well, he's a full time artist. And so he doesn't make as much. But you're a full-time artist.
Two Hot Takes
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You're just doing multiple different variations and freelance. Yeah, absolutely. Why isn't he hustling in the same way as you? Why are you willing to take care of his shortcomings when you have the same hours in a day and he could also take on some freelance stuff? Yeah.
Two Hot Takes
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Maybe like there's something additionally that I could be doing. Yeah. Top comment on this one. Your boyfriend is using you as an ATM. Stop giving him money like every other female in his life. This man is 37 years old. What the actual fuck? This isn't a healthy relationship no matter how much you think you need to communicate. You are being used. Next comment. Exactly.
Two Hot Takes
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Okay. This first one, wedding dress shopping. I'm considering going for the first time in a week. Oh my God. I'm like really nervous. I like don't want to go. Why? I don't know. I'm like really nervous about it. I'm just like, it's one of those things that's like, that's I think my least favorite part about the wedding planning. I don't know why. I'm like, who do I invite?
Two Hot Takes
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He saw a young girl with potential and has been trying to groom her from the start, using the canvas as a manipulation tactic. OP, you deserve better. Be proud of your work. Pay him the same amount for the canvas as you did in the beginning and walk away from him with your head held high.
Two Hot Takes
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Yeah. Business-wise, he's nothing more than a vendor. Her canvas dealer. He shouldn't get a penny more than whatever his cost is plus 10%. That seems fair. Fuck the 10%.
Two Hot Takes
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I know. Well, I also want to bring up that first comments point of like, this isn't a healthy relationship no matter how much you think you need to communicate. She does mention like in previous fights, he like shuts down and doesn't want to talk about it. Like, I don't want to fight. Like, I don't want to fight. First of all, fighting is healthy. Yeah.
Two Hot Takes
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Every relationship, no matter what it is, fighting is okay. But not name calling. As long as you fight constructively.
Two Hot Takes
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Fighting helps build relationships. It strengthens them. It deepens them. Fighting is not inherently bad.
Two Hot Takes
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you not communicating is bad so i'm like why is he gaslighting her about like just she's just trying to communicate and then he like cuts her off he's like sorry don't want to fight that's weird he's like we'll also approach this at a later date just so weird i'm gonna go to op's comments to make sure we're not missing anything because i haven't really gone into these okay
Two Hot Takes
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Three comments I see, all three of which are longer than the post. So let's see what they're really about. When he complains about having zero money from time to time, I lay him options to how he can earn more, mostly telling him to get employed and keep his art a side hustle. It'll be a win-win when he has a stable cash flow from a job and extra money from his art.
Two Hot Takes
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But he tells me he can't work for anyone and get paid so little. He said he doesn't want to get tired over a job.
Two Hot Takes
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Your girlfriend is tired. There are so many, like, I've seen this argument a lot where it's like some people, like, work... Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Sir, I want to beat him with a stick. Like just that's aggressive.
Two Hot Takes
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So you're okay with taking other people's hard-earned money? Yeah. You're okay being a glorified sugar baby? Oh my God.
Two Hot Takes
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um op has another comment i think someone was asking like what what do you really help with he does ask for my service digital layout designing for his commission sometimes first time i gave it to him for free the next are paid i stuck to my client pricing since it's my business but then recently he's persuading a potential project and told me his words quote make me a contract and sample layouts love without payments as an investment in me
Two Hot Takes
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And will she be getting a percentage? Yeah. Will she be getting that percentage? Insane. Of course I will not do it for free. He expects his canvases to be paid. I will ask him to pay for my services. Although, sure enough, he can't afford them, honestly speaking. Last comment from OP is in response to someone saying, you realize you're just a fuck toy in ATM to him, right? Oh, ow.
Two Hot Takes
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What's the age rule from Parks and Recs again? Divide the age by half and plus seven. So the youngest he should be dating rounded up is someone who's 26 years and older. Anything under is creep territory. Now, if you two just had a one night stand and that was it. OK, whatever. But no, it's a full blown relationship. Pop off Tia's street. Yeah. OP responds.
Two Hot Takes
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We had fights before when I caught him adding profiles of minor high school girls on Facebook.
Two Hot Takes
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jail this is why we need a murder one we need a murder one where's that third option I can see his profile following it's public and on Facebook when you try to add a profile as a friend if they do not accept it goes to your following he did that while courting me and in a relationship with me months in I wish I would have seen it earlier or so when I confronted him he acted like he doesn't know how that happened of course but I was being crazy
Two Hot Takes
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I just wanted to know why. He keeps saying he doesn't know and he didn't do that and will just start unfollowing everyone. I just tried to understand it since his hobbies and work are one and outside of that, he has nothing else to do. It might be a habit from when he was single and it just cannot die. He did unfollow the girls after our fight and never followed a girl again.
Two Hot Takes
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Yeah. Oh, my God. I got a board. I know what I want, but I'm scared to go and try on stuff and then feel bad.
Two Hot Takes
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I fucked my mind for months knowing he already got me and is seeking other girls. What's the purpose of trying to connect with other girls when he's already taken?
Two Hot Takes
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He could be their dad. That's just... Disgusting. Yeah. Red flags all over the place. Yeah. I love you.
Two Hot Takes
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reveal any personal information about yourself but if you did we would love to see it I'm sending you a message I hope you see it before this episode comes out so I can include a picture of your art and share a link yes that would be amazing yeah I mean there's so many people that buy prints online and want to support people absolutely so If you're comfortable.
Two Hot Takes
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And honestly, make your website really anonymous. Like you can still. You could make a new Etsy shop that's like secret. Yeah. Secrets. I'm going to send. As long as he gets no cut. He does not get a percentage.
Two Hot Takes
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Yeah. But hey, you know. I'm sending you a message. So reply. And maybe share your art in the comments of the post. Yeah. You know, you're comfy, but.
Two Hot Takes
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I'm titling the message, show me your art. Show me your art. Okay, you ready for this next one?
Two Hot Takes
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So this next one comes with a little bit of homework for you guys. If you want to get entered into a drawing to have me send you a little Too Hot Takes present... And it's going to be fun because the homework requires you to share some hot takes or stories, opinions about audiobooks.
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Okay. Well, this story doesn't make me feel great about it. Oh, good. Yay. So it's coming from Am I the Asshole? It's titled, Am I the Asshole for not inviting my mother to go wedding dress shopping and then buying the one without her? I am a 25 female planning my wedding for next year. I am very early in the process but have started going dress shopping.
Two Hot Takes
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Titled, am I the asshole for not being impressed by my wife listening to audiobooks at three times speed? Earlier this year, my wife started listening to audiobooks at three times speed. Last night, we went to a holiday party and she was talking about how this gave her the ability to read almost 100 books this year.
Two Hot Takes
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Someone we don't know well responded they didn't understand how she could possibly retain information that way and that it seems like it would ruin the pleasure of reading. She got upset because that's exactly what I tell her. On the ride home, she was going on about how people don't take audiobook listeners seriously.
Two Hot Takes
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And I, immaturely, rolled my eyes at that point and told her that it's not about that. It's that when she talks about listening to things at three times speed, it's because she thinks she has a superior ability to process information quickly and wants people to be impressed. It's not actually about reading at all.
Two Hot Takes
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I know this sounds harsh, but I also know my wife well enough to know that impressing people is extremely important to her. And she has acknowledged she's prone to having a superiority complex. So, am I the asshole?
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
Yeah. I know we have listeners that listen to the podcast on like 1.5 or two times speed.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
I think three times is a little wild and I'm curious about that and if she's actually doing it because a part of audiobooks, at least for me, is really enjoying the time and like
Two Hot Takes
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And not having to hold a book and, you know, work as hard like you're getting read this information by an amazing narrator. So to crank it up that much. I don't know. That's just me. I'm a one. I'm a one times. I'm a normal speed girly.
Two Hot Takes
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This is a hot take. And this has come up in AITA and AITH a bunch. Multiple people have said even crazier things. Like the listening speed is one thing, but someone else said that listening to an audio book is not real. Like it doesn't count as having experienced the book.
Two Hot Takes
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You're still hearing the words. Who actually cares? You're understanding the words that are... dictated from the page.
Two Hot Takes
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For context, I haven't always had the best relationship with my mom. She tends to be a bit narcissistic and negative towards everything, but I've learned to get used to it since I was raised by her. Backstory. I've never felt very feminine and usually tend to portray a tomboy vibe. While growing up, she would always make comments of my weight or appearance.
Two Hot Takes
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Well, what's interesting too about this one is the top comment does mention some of those hot takes we were talking about. Top comment, not the asshole. This seems like a silly fight. As an audible listener, I can't say I listened to them on three times speed, but I have listened to about 80 books this year. It's great listening while driving or working out and cleaning.
Two Hot Takes
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OP actually responds, oh, I'm all for audiobooks and disagree with those who think listening to them isn't equivalent to reading.
Two Hot Takes
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Why do people try to gatekeep number of books you've listened to? What's up with gatekeeping books like this? What is this about? But I'm ready for your hot takes, your opinions, your stories on audiobooks. So head over to the link. It is a Google form, super easy to fill out, and share your take. And if you do share, you will be entered into a drawing to win a little present from me.
Two Hot Takes
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So get typing on those hot takes, y'all. Okay, thank you. Okay, before we move on, Dad overheard us reading this story, and he has a little piece of information to share.
Two Hot Takes
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So it's accessible, too? I mean, what's not to like? Okay, submit those hot takes.
Two Hot Takes
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I just don't know if today is going to be good at all. Oh, no. Oh, no.
Two Hot Takes
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Okay, thank you, Michaela's mom. Shout out, mom. I love that. I'd love a mom's take on this next one too. So tell her to get in the comments. Oh, she'll be. Tell her to get in there. This next one is coming from r slash relationship advice, six days old. Titled, my 29 female husband, 36 male, hopes I have a C-section. Posting from my friend's account because my husband follows mine.
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I've been with my husband for a little over 10 years, married for two. We weren't planning on having kids for a couple more years, but we had a slip up with our birth control. And now I'm 11 weeks along with our first. The stress of this being an unplanned pregnancy is weighing heavy on both of us right now.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
And I guess to alleviate the anxiety, my husband has been talking more and more about plans for the future and getting ready for the baby. During one of these conversations, he casually dropped that he hopes I get a C-section when delivering our child and wondered if it was something that happened often.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
I had no clue where he got this idea from or why he thought that was an appropriate thing to say. So I asked what he meant. He explained that he'd heard awful things about natural delivery, the pain, the risks of tearing, etc. And then added, completely serious, that he'd hate to have our sex life ruined if I ended up getting a tear or was looser. Yeah, that's exactly what I was worried about.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
Or even one time while prom dress shopping, I said I wanted to feel beautiful in my dress. And she said, quote, well, you aren't beautiful. You're cute, but you'll never be beautiful. This is really bad. So moral of the story, the first two times I went dress shopping for my wedding gown, I took her with me because I wanted validation from her and I wanted her to think I looked beautiful.
Two Hot Takes
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After birth. He said the last part semi-jokingly, but by that point, I was so angry. I couldn't stay calm or explain how fucking stupid what he said was, not even mentioning all the dangers of a C-section. I was repulsed he'd even bring up his own pleasure in the same sentence of something so serious for me, the baby, and our well-being.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
My husband says I'm overreacting and it was just a joke, but I don't know.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
It's like this is the hard part that at least I feel sometimes. It's like apparent in being a woman and my experience of it. You're damned if you do and damned if you don't. Yeah, exactly. You can't give birth naturally via vaginal delivery because then you'll be loose and stretched out and not as tight and not as great and you'll get fucked up down there.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
But then you can't have a C-section because that's not very womanly. You failed as a mother. Yeah, and you'll have a scar. What? I know. Why is the goalpost always... Seemingly shifting. Why can't the goalposts just stay where they're at and just be normal goalposts? Yeah.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
I think some people do choose to get elective C-sections.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
seen it most times with like professional athletes wives I think they try to like time it based on like things like that so like I've seen that a lot the time a little bit more with a c-section but I've also seen it where like baby has a heart defect and so they want to control the environment and like schedule the baby's open heart surgery like oh yeah like there's times where
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
But that's not where we're at here. And his biggest priority should be making sure wife survives this, baby comes out healthy. A couple months in or something.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
I know it's dumb to do, but it's a trauma thing and I realize it's a me issue. Anyway, during each of those dress fittings, she wouldn't say anything necessarily bad or negative, but she was just overall disinterested or somehow made it about herself. At one point, I even broke down crying in the middle of the store because of her lack of presence.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
And your belly. Pregnancy freaks me. It just freaks me out so much. And I'm just like, the reality is, based on statistics that keep coming out in this country that we live in, giving birth, being pregnant is becoming more dangerous. I mean, the stats are there. That is an objective statement. People are dying more than they have previously and more than in other developed countries.
Two Hot Takes
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How is this helpful to her? Dude. I need people to start questioning in their heads more before they say stuff. Am I going to be helpful or hurtful with this statement? Oh my God, I think that all the time on Twitter.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
People need to embrace inside thoughts more. Mm-hmm. I think there should be a big public initiative. Yeah. Make inside thoughts like happen more often because some of the stuff people have gotten comfortable with saying out loud. Yeah. Should not be. They should not be comfortable.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
actually I know I just saw the greatest video on that and obviously there's so much nuance to that conversation but the way in which she put it was the best way I've ever heard it be said I don't have to show you the video but it's essentially like we should be able to have the nuance that like hey leave that direct person alone right while also recognizing like no something is clearly not healthy and the overall problem is like portraying that as a healthy image for young girls
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
There's a difference. And so it's just like, it was a really good video.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
There's so much gray area to everything we talk about. And that's why, like, we can have 10 wedding stories. They're all going to be slightly different. They're all going to have a little bit different context. And we're probably going to have different takes. Even two very similar stories. Right. Totally different takes. Yeah. I could wake up tomorrow and I'm just a little crappier tomorrow.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
You never know. Like, it's just, that's life. Life is nuanced.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
Dude. On a war path. I literally, I told someone the other day, someone was like, you're funny. And I'm like, I'm not that funny. And the reality is like, I know I'm not that funny. I would be funnier if I wasn't scared about being mean. Yeah. But I'm like, then is that funny if you're being mean? I don't know. I don't know.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
I was very hurt by her lack of interest or maternal warmth, so I decided that the next time I went, I would try on some dresses without her just to see if I feel less anxious or stressed. I happened to find a dress I loved and bought that day. It was a much better time overall as well, and I enjoyed it. A part of me felt slightly guilty for not including her,
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
inside thoughts as well yeah inside thoughts maybe in the group chat yeah keep it in the group chat so top comment on this one men who think women are looser after childbirth are objectively stupid not to mention the men who think that's the only thing that's going to affect their sex life laughing emoji so next comment Yeah, they'll never get it. Next comment.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
Because understanding it would involve effort on their behalf, acknowledging their part in relational issues, and attempting to make consistent change after receiving therapy or feedback from their partner. And we all know that's not likely to ever happen. Too lazy, as so many of them prove time and again.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
In my head, six weeks. God, it doesn't even sound comfortable. Right. Like, you better control yourself while your wife is healing. It's a... Don't even get me started on the people that are like, well, we can't have sex. Can you give me a blowjob? I just had your baby. Is that not enough? Is that not enough?
Two Hot Takes
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But this one's wild. Absolutely wild. Seeing if there's any comments from OP. We do have a few. We definitely use humor to cope with stress, but I still thought he'd be more sensitive over something that has me scared as hell. Not worried about how he'll see me postpartum on top of everything else. Mm-hmm. Intent doesn't negate effect, though.
Two Hot Takes
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And what would he be even trying to accomplish by telling me this? We're having a serious conversation about the future of our family, and he brings up a different medical procedure for the sake of his own pleasure? Fuck that. Nefarious or not, it's a shitty thing to say. So OP gets it. OP's not being gaslight by this.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
No, I talk about this all the time. Like, I really don't want to be pregnant. Like, I'm kind of in the boat of, like, if it happens once, I'll do it. But, like, I really don't. I'm not, like, trying to. I don't know. Like, it's a weird feeling I have. Like, I'm totally down to, like, do other methods. But I'm hoping we'll get to the whole baby in a bag thing very soon.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
but mainly upset that she wasn't offering the emotional support or maternal comfort that I would hope to get from my mother. But I got over it. Until my dad called. He then told me how hurt and bothered she is that I didn't even tell her I was going, let alone invite her.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
Have we talked about this together? We might be close to that. Have you seen the lambs in a bag? No. Wait, the lambs? We haven't talked about this. I've talked about it so much on the podcast. I don't want to bore people, but I'll share with you after.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
Yeah, baby in a bag. Show me the lambs. Yeah, science. Let's get there. Let's get there. So the comments do take a turn and something I do just want to point out again, we keep coming back to age gaps on this one. They started dating when OP was 19 and he was 26, which isn't my favorite. Yeah. And then they've been married for two.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
I'm like, I can hold a bucket and ring a triangle. Oh, wait.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
We weren't planning on having kids, but we had a slip up on birth control. You start getting into comments from OP regarding birth control. OP did go off the pill. And then they were using condoms. However, there's comments here that kind of allude to we've been using condoms. Obviously, condoms fail. And then someone replies, but if he's taking it off, that means no birth control sometimes.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
And OP goes, he didn't always tell me. That doesn't mean I was trying to get pregnant. Oh.
Two Hot Takes
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And I don't, like, read the comments a lot of times before. Yeah. Like, I'll read the story to make sure the story's good because that's all I need. Right. And every single comment that keeps coming up today is, like, again, yeah, like you said, it just keeps making it worse. Yeah. Next comment. Girl, that's called stealthing. Yeah. It's a form of essay. This is unfortunately very bad. And again...
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
A lot of people will do this because babies and having kids keep people tied.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
And it's like, okay, this could be one of those that like it's looking really bad, but like isn't. Like it's just a weird circumstance, coincidence of events. Like, you know what I mean? Yeah. I don't know. Like... Yeah, until we got to the comments. I know. I'm just like, I don't know what's happening here. So the most recent comment from OP, again, because this post is only six days old. Right.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
And the most recent comment from OP is six days old. So... I'm hoping we get an update. I'm just like, all is well. All is well.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
And she is embarrassed because her friends are asking details and she wasn't made aware of any of them because she wasn't included in the last dress fitting. He wants me to apologize to her because I hurt her feelings, but she won't even answer my calls and very briefly will respond to a text with a one word answer.
Two Hot Takes
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Well, and like, OP is so the reason why people are deducing like he took them off is from OP saying all condoms after I took a break from the pill. I know those aren't 100%. So I guess there was always a risk with him taking it off every now and then. Oh, she didn't say sometimes he was doing it without her knowing. So I guess there was always a risk of him taking it off every now and then.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
But like other people did in the comments as well. Like everyone's everyone's jumping to conclusions here. OK, so I'm not sure if it's 100 percent. But like regardless, he can just as easily poke holes in the condoms. Like if someone wants to baby trap you, they can find ways. We've done episodes on baby trapping.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
kind of saying that okay it's very like it's like it could be interpreted one way or the other yeah and it's like how dark does your mind go when you hear that I see I guess there was always a risk there's always a risk yeah of course like that's risk it's just it's all out there floating around some people quantify it and it
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
the pull out method is not enough you guys it's just not enough pull out method is not a method I had a friend who yeah calling it a method does really kind of like make it sound more than it is huh dude I literally had a friend who was like 30 years old And we were talking about like, you know, sex and pregnancy and like, do you want kids? Do you want kids soon?
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
And I asked, I was like, do you want like, do you want kids? She's like, no, not anytime soon. I was like, well, you're not on birth control, right? She goes, yeah, no, no, no. And I was like, so you're using condoms? No, we use the pullout method. And I'm like, so you're trying to get pregnant. Like, I always say it like that, which again, nuance.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
And she's like, no, like the pullout method is 96 per blah, blah, blah. And I'm like, Do you hear yourself? 96 is not that good. I'm like Googling it. What is the pullout method percent rate? What do I Google?
Two Hot Takes
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I don't math well, so I'm going to believe you. I'll let the comments tell us how you did. Oh, my God.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
cute but no oh yeah so don't pull out use birth control use condoms yeah like they protect against stds stis like yeah use use stuff i practice abstinence personally unfortunately i do or there's the big a or the back door but again back door still doesn't protect against diseases only pregnancy yeah yeah yeah yeah
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
I'm seeing her in person tomorrow, but I can't tell if I'm the asshole for not including her in a special moment for her also or am I justified in my initial thoughts and actions.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
It's just that I'm not. I mean, you said unfortunately after you added that.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
Well, I had known about it, but we had a listener come on stage and really tell us about it. That's what is so nice about doing a tour all across the country, girl.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
Titled, am I the asshole for telling my girlfriend that I don't want to sell my family heirlooms yet despite how immoral she thinks they are to keep? Oh, wow. Yeah, this is hard to know. I, 25 female, recently lost my grandmother, 90s. She was a wealthy, educated, eccentric, and well-traveled woman who has a lot of expensive but controversial pieces in her home, which I inherited.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
These include ivory, taxidermy of native and exotic animals, mink's coats, fox furs, a snake bag, and a seal fur jacket. But the most uncomfortable by far is the animal heads mounted on her wall that she inherited from my grandfather's side of the family. Everything is all legal and registered. There's a lot of furniture and other things that belong to my family long gone. Oh, wow. Oh, wow.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
I'm in the camp of most of these animals have been dead for 50 plus years. It's more ethical to wear the clothing than to buy faux fur, which is all plastic. Nothing we do will bring the animals back to life. For example, the taxidermy lionhead was killed by my great great grandfather in 1912. That lion isn't coming back, even if I detest hunting.
Two Hot Takes
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Penny thinks it's immoral to own them outright, despite the family connection and timeline of when the animals died. She thinks we should sell them or destroy them outright. She believes the only ethical animal consumption, clothing, furniture, etc., is for museums and cultural practices.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
We did some digging and the low end is $5,000 to $20,000 and the high end is $50,000 to $200,000 if we sold all the animal products. I'm not totally opposed to selling items, but my grandma died three weeks ago, and I want to wait a little bit.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
I've agreed to remove the heads from the wall slash move the taxidermy, but I've made it clear to Penny that I have no issue wearing the fur, as again, I view it as moral to do so. It's caused some arguments between us, and I'm worried we'll break up over this. My close friends have suggested maybe Penny just wants the money and doesn't care about the sentimental value of the items.
Two Hot Takes
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But I don't know if I can necessarily fault Penny for that, as times are tough with the cost of living crisis. Am I the asshole for this situation? I kind of, okay.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
have some time before doing the whole moral whatever yeah like this is three weeks this is very fresh which i don't know maybe for someone that might be an appropriate timeline but this person is saying it's not like this person is being like i just want a little time yeah to grieve and then i can sort stuff but i find it concerning that penny did say like we should sell them Yeah, that's true.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
And I do think it is concerning that even OP was like, my friends are like, maybe Penny just wants the money. Right. It's not Penny's money. Yeah. So that to me is really weird. It feels like there's some ulterior motives there. And I do agree with OP and like this is a hot take, but I've watched a lot of videos from people who are specialists in like sustainability. Yeah.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
And especially like the meat industry. Mm-hmm. We had this greenwashing shift like, oh, faux leather, faux leather. It's like, no, no, no. It's plastic.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
Literally is plastic. Those faux leather jackets are worse for the environment than a leather jacket because a lot of times the leather jackets are coming from. This is going to get a little dark if you're not a meat eater or maybe even if you are, it's gross. I don't know. But a lot of that leather, those hides, are coming from the meat industry. We produce so much beef in this country.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
Think of all the restaurants. Think of our foods. You're not going to convince millions of people to become vegetarian. It's not going to happen. So if you don't use the leather from the meat industry, then you have an abundance of waste. It actually makes more sense to have a full cycle where you're using every bit of that animal.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
So why not have leather jackets? Why then make all this plastic that hurts us more?
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
I don't know. I almost think it's like... I'd be scared to wear the jacket in fear of getting paint thrown on me. Yeah. But I don't think like... If you don't care about the money and you want to keep the jackets, you should be able to keep the jackets.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
So I read this one and I don't know. I have not looked into research about this, but I would be very curious. It feels like with people, moms more so specifically, this is like my little hypothesis that It feels like moms that are narcissists or have like more of these narcissistic traits have a harder time raising daughters than they do sons.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
Like, what's this line here? She believes the only ethical animal consumption, clothing, furniture, etc., is for museums and cultural practices. Which cultural practices I completely get. And then I'm like, well, what's the difference of this person having a private collection in their home if they're not going out killing new animals? What's the difference between that and a museum?
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
not profiting and for things to give back because they've already been harvested and you want it to go to a museum which you believe is okay then why not donate to a museum versus selling so then why are you selling because if it's an ethical thing then selling it doesn't make any sense if it's just I don't want to see it because it bothers me then I get it if it's like
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
Because it's like you're so against these animals, but you're okay accepting the money from the animals.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
At some point, didn't she say that she'd be okay destroying it? Yeah. I guess that's the point, too. But do you feel like that's... I feel like that's a bluff. Maybe.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
I mean, I fully believe like OP, not the asshole. Absolutely. Yeah. I'm a little like kind of like, well, Penny's kind of being a little aggressive. Absolutely. I don't know if true asshole, if it's truly just her fighting for her beliefs. But then I think it goes to your point, like maybe you are just mismatched. But I would love more context on like how long have you guys been dating? Right.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
And like just kind of things like that. Like do you live together? So Penny's worried about this coming to your house. Like I just want more info.
Two Hot Takes
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I don't agree with going trophy hunting now. Yeah. I don't think that's... I'm not with that. No, I don't either.
Two Hot Takes
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And that's respectful. I have so many questions. Do you guys use the same pots and pans or do you have your own set?
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
It feels like if they're a narcissistic mom and they have a daughter, it's almost like a competition between them. Like the mom looks at it like that versus if they have a son, they don't have as much of a problem with a son.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
a vegetarian okay so like it's not like she cheats but i also don't think she's like as she's not working for pita yeah okay that makes sense i have a clear image now top comment on this one not the asshole listen to your gut on this grieve decide and act later absolutely next comment this op plus if you decide to sell any of those items don't share the money with your girlfriend Yeah.
Two Hot Takes
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Maybe. Maybe. I will say I'm against Penny right now. Next comment. It would be immoral of her to enjoy any of the spoils. Agree. It's so weird. I'm going to see if there's any comments from OP. I just got to know.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
Yeah. No, that's a weird mental gymnastics she's doing. Also, leave her alone. It's three weeks. Three weeks. Three weeks. So OP did have an ad that I guess I'll read before we really move along. Some added info. We're currently staying in my gran's house to sort all of her belongings. That's why I took down the animal heads and moved the taxidermy.
Two Hot Takes
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I saw some people confused about if I moved all of the stuff back to our apartment. I'm going to do inventory of the heirlooms slash anything expensive and handle it accordingly. Storage, give them to family, etc. Our apartment. So I'm getting the vibe they live together.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
I don't know how I'd feel. I'm like if someone gave me a stuffed lion, would I want it? Well, I certainly wouldn't want it, personally. I don't know. I'm curious if I'm like, would I put it in a library? A den? I don't know. Oh, the lion going back in the den?
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
We need an update on this one for sure. Because they're not married, right? No. Okay. Just dating. Just dating. But living together. You'd think at least a couple months then if they moved in. Of course. Well, yeah. Teach their own. Okay, I have one last one for you. I think I'm going to give you a choice.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
I don't know. Is your heart leaning in a direction? Well, they just have two very different vibes. I see. I'll read the titles and I'll see where you lean. So this one is titled, am I the asshole for finally talking to my brother's girlfriend? Should I apologize? Download is like everyone lives in the same house with a parent and the girlfriend does some weird behaviors.
Two Hot Takes
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Or option two, my 30 male wife, 30 female is trying to change an agreement we had. How can I get her to respect my football time? Is there one that you prefer? No, they're both just so good. They are? Yeah, I did read. I'm trying to remember what show it was. You read one of them on a show? I read the football one at a live show.
Two Hot Takes
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I don't remember which show, but we had some really diverse opinions on it.
Two Hot Takes
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Okay. So this is coming from r slash relationship advice, 15 days old. So it must have been one of my last tour stints. Arizona? Maybe? Was it you? My 30 male wife, 30 female, is trying to change an agreement we had. How can I get her to respect my football time? Hey Reddit, I am unfortunately a huge Jaguars fan and also a Georgia fan. I went to UGA and I'm still pissed by their loss yesterday.
Two Hot Takes
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Anyways, it's been seven years since I've been with my lovely wife, married for three, and she's almost perfect.
Two Hot Takes
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When we first got together, I told her that my football time is non-negotiable. She initially was great with respecting that until we had a baby. Recently, she's been violating our agreement. I have compromised by giving her my Saturday except for the few hours my Bulldogs play, not NFL.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
She's saying now that we have a kid, I just can't watch football all Sunday, Monday night, and Thursday night, which is ridiculous and unfair, especially since it's not like football is all year round.
Two Hot Takes
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Like, is that really it? I know. Like, is it just football? But even saying it's just football and it's not it's not the whole year. No, it's four days of the week, though, at least. Well, in preseason, the season is getting longer. Yeah.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
There's podcasts, there's shows. But it's August to August. mid-February, August, September, October, November, December, January, February. Yeah, that's more than half the year. That is more than half the year and more than half the week.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
And I think the thing is, it's like, okay, if you replaced watching football because this is his hobby, this is his passion, understand, but if you traded that out for something, say, she could do or even another hobby he could do where it's like, I'm going hunting, I'm going fishing.
Two Hot Takes
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I'm golfing. No, I'm on animals. But it's like golf is a great example. Like I'm going golfing four days a week.
Two Hot Takes
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At least, you know, three hours Monday night, three hours Thursday night, three hours Saturday and all day Sunday. Yeah. No one would be OK with that. Yeah. And it is more of a passive, leisurely hobby. But then you need to adjust. And like, if you're watching football all day Sunday, the baby is with you all day Sunday. You're at home sitting in front of the TV.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
But that's not great for a baby to be in front of the TV. So then I'm like, fuck. I'm like, can we like strap? Like, can he listen? Would that be okay? Like if he... Oh, my God. Got to listen. But I'm like, you need to be doing something to trade off. Like, does she get four days a week?
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
No, because there aren't that many days left. I just, like, I get... And I don't want him to neglect his passion. But at the same time, like, you did decide to have a kid.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
This is my little brother. And I told that to people on the live show. I go, my little brother is this person. He doesn't even watch like single games. He puts on the red zone where like there's four split screens happening at once and it'll shift to every touchdown. Yeah, I do that sometimes.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
Well, that's the thing. Like if this was his career and he was an announcer, he was a stat guy. Why not? It would be a different argument. But this is a passion. And like you're in a season of life right now where you just had a baby and like she's saying like, hey, we have a kid like there's got to be a little give and take.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
And then he... I think what really pisses me off about this one is he's like, well, I have compromised already by giving her my Saturdays except for the few hours my Bulldogs play. Just the three hours. That's a long time. Again, it's then four days of the week. It's a majority of the week, which, like, you're basically, like, splitting 50-50. Like, it's... Also, you're saying that, like...
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
Yeah. I know I'm blown away and the comment from prom too because like that was a very important time yeah and it's like well you aren't beautiful you're cute but you'll never be beautiful what the fuck like sorry what what Every single fucking person is beautiful in their own way. Like, and to say that to your daughter who just said, like, I want to be, I want to feel beautiful in my dress.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
i don't know no i i think so it's like it's a time of need right now and it's like maybe maybe she didn't anticipate maybe she thought she could do it on her own maybe she didn't you know think it would be an issue and she was okay with it her first thought when she got pregnant probably wasn't like oh no football yeah football is he gonna be okay with not watching football on fridays and thursdays
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
I mean, there's going to be eventually. I do think this like I could see there being football every day of the week.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
I know. Like when they have games in like Brazil or London and stuff like that. It is very interesting. We do have a couple of comments from OP. Okay. What's he saying to us? The first one I see him respond to is, this is something so little, though. It was like a verbal agreement, right? Like, I can understand if you need your me time or football time.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
Basically, just talk to her and come to a compromise because a successful marriage is all about communication and commitment to which compromise branch off from those two things. Okay? And then Opie goes, I've been trying to compromise, but it's like you give her an inch and she asks for a mile. Oh. I love my wife. I hate this guy. And she is great outside of this.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
We do have a comment about someone asking for clarification on wife's free time. Yeah. They go, when does your wife have free time? You're asking for 20-ish hours a week. What does she get? And OP responds, on non-football days, I do the majority of the cooking and cleaning. Also, by the time Monday and Thursday night football are on, we already put the baby to sleep.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
And someone goes, when you're cooking and cleaning, who's watching your kid? And OP goes, look, I know where this is going, but I also get off work before my wife does. So by the time she gets home, I already did the baby stuff. Okay. Yeah. I appreciate that. Yeah, like that's great. And I then would say like, okay, so Mondays and Thursdays football locked in 100%. Baby's asleep.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
I got no issue with that. Baby's asleep. I'm actually going to go and do some wine night with the girls. I'm going to go to book club. I'm going to go to sewing. I'm going to do something. Right. There's her time. He can sit at home with a baby monitor next to him. I'm down for that. But then it's like you're giving up both weekend days for football. Yeah.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
There's got to be a... This weekend, you can pick Saturday. Next weekend, you pick Sunday. Like, you don't need to be plastered to the TV both weekend days.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
I would also just like feel from like emotional and mental stimulation like with my partner. Like I would feel so neglected. Like it's a weekend. We have a baby. Let's go to an apple orchard. Let's take the baby out and go on a hike. Let's do something. Like this is also an important development time. And for you to not be bonding with your family. Yeah.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
Like, you're, you'll never be. What? Like, I don't, even an enemy shouldn't speak to you like that.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
It doesn't feel like one of those where it's like, oh, you can watch football. And then she gets the marriage, she gets the baby, and then it's like, no football. She's not even saying that. She's just like, hey, we need a little more. I need a little help. She's probably in over her head. At least it doesn't feel like a bait and switch to me, but...
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
It's crazy. And I'm thinking in my head, I'm like, if the genders were flipped and she had something that was like... Yeah, like watching The Bachelorette. Yeah.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
Let alone your mother. No. No, dude. I just realized one of my biggest pet peeves is the preface, with all due respect. Yeah. Like, okay, if you're saying that and then you say something extremely negative afterwards, it's not fucking respectful. It's not all due respect. Like, that's actually... That's so disrespectful. And you prefacing it almost put me in fight or flight mode.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
Too much. For seven months of the year. Nope. You got to compromise. Yeah, absolutely. Put on a reality show podcast that gives you spark notes instead. Like you can stay caught up, but it's a little much. Yeah, 1000%. I think he's being a little selfish.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
Yeah. That's something that I encounter a lot. And I think the ability to be flexible is something I really hold dear. And I really appreciate with people like you today. And I feel like every time we record, I'm like, I need to sleep a little more. Can we push an hour? And like, we're like, I just appreciate the flexibility so much. And some people, some people don't have that.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
I feel like that's like not an innate characteristic of some people where it's like, Hey, yeah. Okay. I'll be there at four. But it's like, if you show up at four 15, it's the end of the world for them. Like they do not have the ability to adapt or be fluid with plans. Or in a disagreement. They're like really hanging on to that one thing.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
Yeah. You let me down. Exactly. Okay, but that was one time. And you can't keep holding that dagger in my back. We have to move on. We have to move on. And if we can't move on...
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
You would think. Top comment on this one. Yeah, you have a baby. You can't just expect to tune out and leave her to it so you can watch football for hours. Does she get her time for hours a day's day of the week? Yeah, does she get three nights a week free to do anything she wants without interruptions? I'm guessing not.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
Minnesota is scraping by. Scraping by. And I'm just like, I'm not going to get my hopes up. Our quarterback situation is stressful. Cause for concern. Yeah. We're 9-2. And you can enjoy things and be normal about it. Yeah. 9-2, I watched yesterday. That's really good, actually. I know. Yeah. But football, like a lot of people enjoy football, but... And then they still balance healthy lives.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
And a lot don't. My brother, he needs to find a better balance. He needs a girlfriend. He needs a girlfriend. Someone, it was so funny. Oh my God, I posted on the Instagram for like game time because they sent us to the Vikings game. And someone on the comments was like, I swiped on your brother on Hinge, but it wasn't a match. And I'm like...
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
So I'm like, I think he does need a girlfriend. Maybe he'd be a little better about football.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
He's a character. He's a good kid, but he's a character.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
I hope everyone agrees. I tried to have a well-rounded, balanced episode. Yeah.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
It's giving me, like, OG Twitter vibes. Like, it's very, like, happy and funny. I love that.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
Well, what I appreciate about Blue Sky is that it's, like...
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
open source and so it's like it cannot be bought by someone or controlled in that way yeah which i really i really like it does feel more neutral yeah i really like it i watched uh some like news story with like one of the founders or something on it and i was like i like this good for them yeah good for them when they say that they're making social media to be neutral and then they actually do make social media to be neutral shocking absolutely shocking
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
But thank you guys so much for being here. Another episode. We have amazing content on Patreon for this month, November. If you're hearing this in December, it's still there. And if you join in December, you get all of December's content. And...
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
november's content and october's content and september you get all the content there's a back catalog of i think at least 500 posts on our patreon whoa and depending on when you're hearing this the top two tiers are 50 off until december 2nd so come on over and join us it's gonna be really fun but thank you again for being here and until next time bye
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
No. I really can't. No. And then let's talk about like the self-absorbed side of this. Yeah. Oh, well, you're embarrassing me in front of my friends because I couldn't even provide them details. So you only care what other people think about you. You want to look like this doting, amazing mom to your friends when that is the furthest thing from reality. I
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
No, this is extremely toxic. And I completely understand why OP is like questioning everything, because look at the relationship you have. You're being gaslit by not only your mom with the stonewalling punishment, emotional, psychological manipulation, but your dad's calling and chiming in. Right. Your dad is enabling her toxic behavior. So it's no wonder you can't tell which is up or down or.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
Oh my gosh. I'm really excited to have this theme today. I am too. I'm like, this was all your... This was your idea.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
Not the asshole. Top comment. They quote OP's mom. She said, well, you aren't beautiful. You're cute. You'll never be beautiful. Oh, my God. Wow. That's really hurtful. I'm so sorry. You are not the asshole here, but your mother, she's a real piece of work. You did what you needed to do for yourself because your mother is so unsupportive. And I would tell my father that if I were you.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
He's her flying monkey sent to try and make you feel bad. Well, you have no reason to feel bad or guilty. In my opinion, you don't owe her a thing. She's embarrassed. Too bad. She's attempting to make this all about her. Are you familiar with the gray rock method? Look into it. Your special moment is your special moment.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
She's using emotional manipulation to deflate your joy and make your wedding about her. You are justified. Wait, what's the gray rock method? Gray rocking is where you make yourself like uninteresting to a narcissist or someone who's like trying to mess with you. You don't really engage. You just kind of like give them the bare minimum to a point where they like fall in.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
I'm sure there's a better way. I don't know. I can't believe I've never heard of that. It's a big therapy tool. Yeah. So it's a phrase, gray rock is a metaphor for a way to deflect or diffuse further abuse from a partner, family member, or a coworker. Simply put, the gray rock method is when a person who is enduring abuse purposefully acts as boring as possible during encounters with their abuser.
Two Hot Takes
193: Genuinely Self-Absorbed?..
Whoa. So you don't give them anything to like bite back. It's so challenging to do. Like, especially if you're like used to having like that, like argumentative relationship with someone where you're just like trying to defend yourself. It's, it's innately within us to want to defend ourselves. But like, you have to just be like, oh, okay. Yeah, I see your side. Yeah.
Two Hot Takes
197: Leaving it in 2024..
Is she like against it a little bit or? No. No, she's chill. My mom doesn't want to be on my podcast at all. She just doesn't want to be perceived by the internet.
Two Hot Takes
197: Leaving it in 2024..
Oh, wow. Oh, wow. I just, I feel like the way she worded it, I don't think she will ever see him the same. Like feeling gross by him touching her. As someone who did take back someone who cheated on me, It was awful. Like I became a crazy person. I never got over it. And then we broke up.
Two Hot Takes
197: Leaving it in 2024..
But I mean, it can go different for different people. It can. But it doesn't have to. Like there are so many people out there. What he provides can be replicated.
Two Hot Takes
197: Leaving it in 2024..
Yeah. That's so, that's a huge part of it. Like if you can't trust that person again, and then you're always second guessing things, you're always trying to find the truth, trying to see if there's actually something else behind what they're saying to you. It's just so hard to come back from that.
Two Hot Takes
197: Leaving it in 2024..
But grandparents even better in my opinion, in my humble. Well, yeah, they're so wise.
Two Hot Takes
197: Leaving it in 2024..
Similar with like conversations with someone that you've broken up with and they treated you badly and now they want to get it off their conscience and apologize about it when you're okay now. It's like, this isn't actually for me. This is to make you feel like a better person. Like you're apologizing, but it's to take the load off your shoulders. I've been good. I got over it myself. Yeah.
Two Hot Takes
197: Leaving it in 2024..
They've been through so much shit. And they get so like straight up. They really get to it. They don't waste no time.
Two Hot Takes
197: Leaving it in 2024..
I mean, it's unlikely that you only cheated one time and happened to get someone pregnant that one time that you cheated.
Two Hot Takes
197: Leaving it in 2024..
2025 is going to be amazing. 2025, leaving this dude behind.
Two Hot Takes
197: Leaving it in 2024..
But I understand like the difficulty in immediately separating from that person. I think it sounds a lot easier in theory to be like, oh, yeah, someone she don't even got someone else pregnant. Obviously, I'm immediately leaving. I have more self-respect than that. And like, yeah, in the ideal world, when you're a little bit separated from the situation, you will.
Two Hot Takes
197: Leaving it in 2024..
And you'll feel better later on that you did that. But when you're in the moment and that's your best friend, like that is so hard to emotionally detach all of those crossing.
Two Hot Takes
197: Leaving it in 2024..
long before us no yeah recently when i heard that like our generation or gen z is having less sex than any generation before i was like so what does that mean about what kind of life was my where my grandparents i don't think they were actually my grandparents got well the ones that i know got married at like 18 depends if they were boomers yeah because they were booming oh wait they were booming it's in the name it was the parents of the boomers yeah
Two Hot Takes
197: Leaving it in 2024..
Yeah, now he's got some bills to pay. Like, yeah, you go off and do your thing. Yeah. And in the prime of life, 24. Oh, my God. Let's go. Yeah. Let's get crazy. Let's get wild.
Two Hot Takes
197: Leaving it in 2024..
2025, yeah. We never know. Maybe I'll leave my chastity in 2024. Maybe that's what I'm leaving in 2024.
Two Hot Takes
197: Leaving it in 2024..
Yeah. And she already like feels embarrassed about it. She already was like, I don't know why I did that. I understand like that bothering someone and then being upset about it. So I was like, oh, yeah, like I would probably be upset about that, too. And then I was like, wait, but like not like that.
Two Hot Takes
197: Leaving it in 2024..
And also the way that he was yelling at her, like things about her age and stuff like that, saying things that she wouldn't repeat. And then, yeah, like the ways that he told her to make it up to him, a lot of those didn't have anything to do with actually healing the problem.
Two Hot Takes
197: Leaving it in 2024..
Like they weren't things that would repair trust or like repair. It's just like.
Two Hot Takes
197: Leaving it in 2024..
And to have that much rage every single night. Like, not even just blowing up once.
Two Hot Takes
197: Leaving it in 2024..
coming and screaming at her like yeah this is this is honestly this is scary yeah this is not and it's like if there's an issue in a relationship for example an issue of trust then the ways to make it up to someone is to maybe go to therapy together or talk about like maybe what caused you to act that way or whatever like if there's an issue in a relationship there are ways to address it that actually fix that issue instead of just like
Two Hot Takes
197: Leaving it in 2024..
bombarding someone and controlling them and, like, humiliating them and belittling them. Like, that doesn't fix whatever you're saying is the problem in your head.
Two Hot Takes
197: Leaving it in 2024..
Oh my God. I would love like a video episode of you reading two outtake stories to like a panel of grandmothers. Say less. Say less. Say less. It's beautiful to me.
Two Hot Takes
197: Leaving it in 2024..
People who actually get cheated on aren't even reacting this meanly. Right.
Two Hot Takes
197: Leaving it in 2024..
No, but you were right that this was like a pre-indicator of further abuse.
Two Hot Takes
197: Leaving it in 2024..
Hit it with a hammer. On the bright side, she is leaving him in 2024. What a badass. Yeah.
Two Hot Takes
197: Leaving it in 2024..
I know. I'm like shocked that it went because that is often I think in a lot of these stories our fear of where it'll end up but we don't always get that update of it actually happening.
Two Hot Takes
197: Leaving it in 2024..
Yeah and also like I'm also someone who doesn't drink that often and I've dated people who had controlling aspects of their personality that didn't come out until later because I wasn't doing any of the things that would have made them upset. Yeah. And that kind of sounds like what happened here like she doesn't drink that often and the one time she did like
Two Hot Takes
197: Leaving it in 2024..
he made a big problem about it it's like well now you can never drink again so it's like sometimes there are these like dormant controlling traits that you just haven't triggered because maybe you just don't go out and you don't really do those types of things you don't even realize that they would cause such a fuss about it if you did
Two Hot Takes
197: Leaving it in 2024..
Oh, my God. What could we like? We could sing like, Mary, did you know? I heard the like Pentatonix version of that song recently. I was like, OK, this goes hard. This goes hard. No, it's good.
Two Hot Takes
197: Leaving it in 2024..
I bet there are a lot out there that listen to this podcast though. Like my mom, she's not like a grandmother age. She's very young. She's middle aged. She's only like
Two Hot Takes
197: Leaving it in 2024..
Right. And I would feel that way too. But if I came to my partner and they were already like, I'm embarrassed that I did that, I'd be like, oh, then we don't even need to talk about this. Like you feel weird about it. I feel weird about it. That was just like a silly blip that happened. I mean, everyone has different comfort levels with that type of thing.
Two Hot Takes
197: Leaving it in 2024..
And obviously you hope to be with a partner that has a similar comfort level to you as those things. But But yeah, if someone's like, wow, I can't believe I did that the moment I did, I was so embarrassed to be like, well, then I don't even need to tell you that I'm uncomfortable with it if you already are. Yeah.
Two Hot Takes
197: Leaving it in 2024..
I don't think it's a big deal, but I understand that there are people out there who would be like,
Two Hot Takes
197: Leaving it in 2024..
60 um but she loves like am i the asshole stories so much she loves looking at the they make her way to facebook i guess when she sees them she also loves this podcast as well but i think you probably have a lot of seniors out there hey girls hey boys uh i'll put together an application form or you can nominate your grandma grandpa the golden two hot takes
Two Hot Takes
197: Leaving it in 2024..
that's a boundary hey why'd you do that the other thing the other rule of his that was crazy to me in regards to that is to unfollow his friends on social media after that experience like that also feels like an indicator of crazy control because like like what are you implying by that like what are you saying that she was trying to do are you really like you don't even want her to know your friends anymore because of this instance like that that one was also kind of crazy
Two Hot Takes
197: Leaving it in 2024..
Maybe lighten it up now. I was like, please give me a reprieve. Either is fine, actually. I'm fine either way.
Two Hot Takes
197: Leaving it in 2024..
Am I the asshole? Am I crazy? Because wait, those didn't sound like that much of like she was sitting on his lap. That sounds like a normal relationship thing and sitting on the counter talking to him all night. Why is that babying? Am I crazy? I'm like, this is love.
Two Hot Takes
197: Leaving it in 2024..
She didn't really give a good example of the babying. I was like kind of ready to be on her side.
Two Hot Takes
197: Leaving it in 2024..
Yeah, like that example doesn't sound like anything. Also, they're newly engaged. Like what?
Two Hot Takes
197: Leaving it in 2024..
Do you want your son's fiance to hate him? Like what? I don't know. And then the other example was she was like sitting on the counter talking to him.
Two Hot Takes
197: Leaving it in 2024..
Right, and I feel like if she had any better examples of this, she would have given them.
Two Hot Takes
197: Leaving it in 2024..
So that's why I just don't think this is an issue. This is weird.
Two Hot Takes
197: Leaving it in 2024..
Yeah, that's what... And I was like, it's either going to go one of two ways. Either, yes, they're being really obnoxious, or this is one of those mothers of sons who unfortunately...
Two Hot Takes
197: Leaving it in 2024..
I don't think so. I don't think... I don't think so. I mean, the brushing the hair, but, like... Like, sitting on the lap and... I mean, I guess, like, yeah, if they're really young, but, like... And that was... I don't know. Maybe I'm overthinking that one, but I didn't really... No, it's just not where my head would go.
Two Hot Takes
197: Leaving it in 2024..
I'm just like, what went through her mind when she went into their bedroom and saw her sitting on his lap that she thought that that was a gross, incestuous moment? I don't understand.
Two Hot Takes
197: Leaving it in 2024..
Yeah, provide your incredible examples. She's going to be like, he makes more money than her. So, huh. Okay.
Two Hot Takes
197: Leaving it in 2024..
If he's happy and he's doing what he wants to be doing, he's fine. He's okay. I'm sure she does stuff. I'm sure whatever they worked out is working for them. They clearly are happy with each other. Yeah.
Two Hot Takes
197: Leaving it in 2024..
Well, they think they're like, I raised him to be so great and so wonderful and so successful. And now you get to reap the benefits of that. Is that what it is? Like, yeah, yeah.
Two Hot Takes
197: Leaving it in 2024..
Yeah, like him going silent when she said that, that feels like a response to where he knows he just can't engage with her when she gets like this and she's done it before.
Two Hot Takes
197: Leaving it in 2024..
And yeah, I could absolutely see being like, oh, it's my parents coming into town. I'll handle dinner tonight. Like it's my family. I'll make them like that's a normal. It's like one dinner that she's mentioning. She's literally giving the example of one dinner.
Two Hot Takes
197: Leaving it in 2024..
Yeah, if he were writing in and saying, hey, I'm doing all the cooking and I'm making all the money and she doesn't do anything, I'm very dissatisfied. We'd be like, okay, set some boundaries. That's not what happens. That's not what's happening here.
Two Hot Takes
197: Leaving it in 2024..
You are my cheeseburger, my tasty cheeseburger. I'll wait for you. I'll wait for you. You're going to give us a copyright strike.
Two Hot Takes
197: Leaving it in 2024..
So maybe not. The coin. Give it to the coin. That's what it's here for.
Two Hot Takes
197: Leaving it in 2024..
Oh, wow. I love that you're showing it so we can't be accused of cheating.
Two Hot Takes
197: Leaving it in 2024..
I'm wondering if she like recently got on ADHD medication or something. This happened to me. You would yap 24-7? Yeah, when I was like taking Vyvanse, I was yapping.
Two Hot Takes
197: Leaving it in 2024..
Yeah, but then I would like, I would delegate. I would find different friends to yap to at different intervals of the day. At least you were, okay, you were a little self-aware. I was respectful with my yapping. And as well as strategic, which you sometimes have to be.
Two Hot Takes
197: Leaving it in 2024..
But yeah, no, like you're saying, I mean, this is poor communication if it has to get to a point where you're exploding on someone instead of, you know, having a moment of first like, hey, you a little more chatty lately. What's going on? Is there something going on? Or like, hey, I'm working right now. Sorry. We can talk about this later. My beloved, let's chat later. Yeah. XX.
Two Hot Takes
197: Leaving it in 2024..
Do you even like your fiance? Yeah, but they've known each other since they were 17 and 16, and now all of a sudden, she's yapping too much?
Two Hot Takes
197: Leaving it in 2024..
Leave it in 2024. The two methods he described are ignoring her, not good, and blowing up at her, not good. surely there's another way. Like yapping with her, maybe. Like, yap to her about it.
Two Hot Takes
197: Leaving it in 2024..
Right. I'm like that. I need I need alone time real bad. I'm like, oh, yeah, the socialization has really taken its toll on me. I need some moments alone. But if I'm with friends on like a trip or dating someone or whatever, like they all know that about me. And if I go to my room for a couple hours, it's like no one takes that personally. I talk to them about it.
Two Hot Takes
197: Leaving it in 2024..
I'm like, not about you, not about anybody. I'm just going to take some time. I'm just chilling on my phone. I'll be back. Yeah.
Two Hot Takes
197: Leaving it in 2024..
And that would really hurt my feelings too, like to be told, and it would affect sort of the way I communicate with them in the future. I'd be like, oh, they don't like when I talk.
Two Hot Takes
197: Leaving it in 2024..
I don't know. Cause I'll just find out when he blows up at me next time.
Two Hot Takes
197: Leaving it in 2024..
Or it could even be funny. If you're like, babe, you've been talking for quite some time now. Like, it's just like not that. Take a rest.
Two Hot Takes
197: Leaving it in 2024..
I just think if parents have strong rules about how they want to raise their kids, all of the other people should respect that. I would love to know what the names are so that I could be like, all right, like it's really that crazy. Like Marty and calling him Mart. I don't know. Yeah. Or Marta.
Two Hot Takes
197: Leaving it in 2024..
I mean, I will say it's not like he did the worst thing in the world. I think it's like poor communication and rude. I think that like it's not they need to break up. I think they could probably get past it.
Two Hot Takes
197: Leaving it in 2024..
No, but didn't he say that she never yapped the way she's only just recently become a yapper?
Two Hot Takes
197: Leaving it in 2024..
Because otherwise you would know. It's like, oh, it's so nice that we can just be in silence right now.
Two Hot Takes
197: Leaving it in 2024..
I also feel like if you're chatting more, that usually means you're like happier or like it's kind of a nice thing. It's nice that she's so chatty. It's nice that you've known her since she was 16 and she still has so much to say to you. Like, I don't like I think those are nice. I understand getting annoyed by it, but I just feel like his reaction is so negative.
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Yeah. And I wonder like, if she would say she's talking more like that would be so interesting to hear what she thinks like if she were to be like no actually this is how I've always been or if she were to be like yeah we just like exciting things are coming up I want to talk to him or I want to connect before this big moment I don't know I wonder
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I like your theory, though, about it being about the wedding, because he knows he would sound like an asshole if he said she's been talking so much about our wedding or like so much about she's been trying to talk to me about wedding planning so much. Yeah. Like I could so feasibly see someone leave that part out.
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I'm sorry. What? Why? Why does she she's internalized? This is her problem so much when it's every other person's problem. What? Like, I can't believe I caused this. He caused it. All of them caused it. Also, what now? Like his closest friends are going to think you're like all the wives are going to think you're an evil liar. And this is supposed to be your circle for the next how many?
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This is in no way her fault. And in fact, like I understand feeling like it's not your place to tell someone that their husband is cheating on them. I understand feeling like bad about the way that it was said and like the fact that you're the one saying it. But like she deserves to know. Absolutely.
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She's a hero for them. There's not really an ideal setting. No. And she's been in something similar. So she's acting off of, like, I wanted to... I wish someone had told me in that situation that that was happening. And also, like, you're not going to ever trust this guy going off on a guy's trip with his friends. Imagine sending this guy off to his bachelor party with these two fuckheads. No.
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And they do it. And they're probably enablers. They're all enablers to each other. That is, like, oh, that's such a fear. Dating someone whose friends are enablers of, like, poor behavior. Mm-hmm. That's because sometimes people already like have a weak will. It's like all they need is a little bit of a push and then they're doing it.
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Yeah. He's like, oh, babe, I know they're awful. I hate that they're doing that. It's so bad. But like we should cover this up, though. To cheat?
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Yeah. Yeah. I mean, my name is Michaela and some of my friends call me Mitch, which is like kind of a boy's name. But I also think it's cute. I don't think it would have given me a complex growing up. But I think like what's important is if parents say we don't want them watching this episode.
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I just fear that they'll be able to lie their way out of it so easily now that they've already gotten her to look crazy and be like, I made it up.
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The fact that she feels so crazy and that she's like so in her head now, clearly that is his ability at gaslighting her and making her feel insane that this is again an indicator of things not being good moving forward. And yeah, you probably do feel a little bit more sensitive about this than other people, but you're not projecting onto these people in an unhealthy way that's not fair to them.
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You're reacting how a person would and saying, hey, this isn't cool. This isn't a right way to treat people. Yeah. No. And it bothers me as a normal human being.
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Exactly. Makes me gag thinking about the conversations they're having.
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Oh, my God. I can't imagine. But that's, like, a jealousy thing, too. That's an insecurity jealousy thing. Like, you clearly are jealous of your friends. That's why you're doing this.
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Sorry, no one thinks their boyfriend would do the same. No one's like, I think that this guy that I'm starting to see is really a cheater. I don't like cheating, but he probably is. No one's thinking that. But yeah, if my friend did this one time, like you said, I'd be like, oh, you fucked up. I feel bad.
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But if they were serially doing this, that's just not the kind of person I would be friends with.
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But none of my friends would do that. So no, that's why I'm friends with them. Exactly. So good people.
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We need a word for when like you think you've self-sabotaged, but actually you're better off because of it.
Two Hot Takes
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I have a word with my friend for it, but it's because of it. We call it getting spectrumed, but it's because I got scammed. But then the deal I got ended up being better with the Internet, the spectrum.
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It's a whole thing, yeah. But there needs to be another word.
Two Hot Takes
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Come up with or tell us. Come up with a word. I don't think there is one.
Two Hot Takes
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Let's all come up with a word for the dictionary. You made a mistake, but now your life is so much better. Thank God I made that mistake.
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Do a little voice note. Get a voice recording of your next fight with your boyfriend about it and then get your proof and then send it.
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There'll probably be a lot more even by the time this comes out.
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I don't know how they could stay together if like his friend group now hates her and thinks she's crazy and they're fighting over this and now she doesn't trust him and the Internet's telling. Like, I just feel like there are so many elements from actually like his side and her side of potentially breaking up now, which him breaking up with her would also be getting spectrumed.
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By revealing all of the lying going on. Yeah. I broke his confidence. Yeah. She's the villain out of all of these people.
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I think you're right, Justin, though. Like, this is something she wanted to do. And, like, yeah, she was drunk, but, like, she was probably going to at some point either way. Yeah.
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I think before 2025, we'll get an update that they've broken up. And I will be checking. I will be looking into it, looking into this. Fingers crossed. Fingers crossed. Okay.
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Okay, sometimes growing up isn't fun. Sometimes when you grow up, things have to change that maybe you wish you could still eat sundaes at 2 a.m. every night. And that would be lovely. But you get headaches when you're an adult when you do that. And there comes a point in our lives when we have to change. Mm-hmm.
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I don't think he has to never again pee in the shower. I'm confused. But it can't go on like this. There can't be a constant piss smell in your lovely shower.
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Yeah, I don't think it's normal for the pee smell to last. No.
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I personally would not love for someone to be peeing in my shower.
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I have a handful of times in my life. Only a handful? It's not something I regularly participate in. But I have a lot of... like, bacteria, like, dirt-type things, like, that I get really freaked out about. Okay. So it could be just coming from that place. Okay. Like, I will wash my hands so many times in the day before doing anything else. Like, I just... It would bother me. No, I get that.
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But I also understand like that it's sort of it's an easy area to clean. You just have to be cleaning it.
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That's amazing. That's lovely. I mean, I close the lid to the toilet before I flush every time. Like, I don't like... You're tidy. Yeah, I just don't.
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I just get freaked out in my head about that kind of thing. No, I talk about it to Justin all the time.
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Yeah. You can call to stop talking about the poop particles, Morgan.
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His joy is actually playing a game with it where he goes all over the place.
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I have one. Did you get it for campaign? I did because, well, also doomsday prepping because every few months I'm like, oh my God, I need to buy everything that you could possibly need if I had to survive in the wild.
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We should try them before because they expire, don't they? Yeah. And my water is going to expire soon, my five-year water supply.
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No, but I have like a big power thing that can solar power. So then like I could plug it into that.
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No, I feel like D-E-R-E-K is really a common name. But I love that.
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This is so wholesome. Thank you for bringing in something low stakes like this. I mean, I think it's fine to tell her the truth, but I also think it's fine to be like 10 years have passed. I have a new favorite thing.
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People's favorite things change. Like my dad always had my mom make him a chocolate, not had her make him, but like his favorite thing for his birthday was like this chocolate pie. And this year for the first time in like 30 years, he asked for something else. What'd he go with?
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actually was something that I made so I kind of killed that it's like a short bread with like a chocolate ganache on top oh it's so good but I think it's like an easy way to do that is like actually babe my favorite thing that you made this year and like this recipe really really stood out to me now I think this is my new favorite is your chicken alfredo if that's still his favorite but
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Yeah. Because I don't think it would be the worst thing in the world to tell her, but she also might be like, shoot, I thought I was doing such a great thing for you all these years. She probably wouldn't be like mad.
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mad at you but she might just feel like ah this thing that I thought I was doing for you like it's almost just like preserve that yeah because you'd be taking that away from her to make yourself feel better
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Yeah, it depends. I think that this person probably knows best how it would go in their relationship.
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Thank you. D-E-R-E-K. Like, that's the only thing on my mind now. Not even the actual M-I-N-E-S. I'm like, Derek is like going through all the names. That's always like if you get a souvenir and they've got preset names on them, Derek's going to be on there.
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I think white lives are OK. I think I'm just like it depends on the situation. If she was like just so proud about making your favorite thing and like it meant a lot to her that she was able to do that for you and thought it meant a lot to you, too. And it's like, oh, this whole time you haven't been enjoying this.
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Like that that would hurt. Yeah, I don't I don't know. It depends on the relationship. It depends on how much it meant to her. It depends. It depends.
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Yeah, and I'm also, like, picturing my mom in this scenario and, like, the things that she makes me for my birthday each year. And if I were to tell her, like, actually for the last 10 years I haven't liked that food you made me, I do really think it would hurt her feelings. And, like, that's kind of the only example I can go off of. Yeah. And I just think it's not worth it. I don't know.
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Well, you know what, you guys? What? He's going with the lie.
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That should be clipped as like, I decided to tell my wife the truth. Boo.
Two Hot Takes
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Exactly. That's sweet. I'm so happy for them. Love is love. Tell the truth, baby. Love is love.
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No, I think he did what was right for his relationship because he knows the nuances and intricacies better than any of us ever could. Absolutely. And love wins at the end of the day. Happy ending. Happy ending. Thank you so much for bringing us joy there. At the end.
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No one saw the remix? I did see. I actually did see that today.
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And the actress kind of like dancing to it. I didn't see that. Oh, she posted it. She was like, what the hell shirt?
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I know the fact that I got to do the Thanksgiving episode and the last one of the year. Are you kidding? Mikayla is not being left behind in 2024. So exciting. I'm honored.
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kick the curb on i can't do that that would be taking my joy away i know and i want it like i think i need to like hypnotize myself to like like stop cracking i've never done it but i'm gonna try to leave like door dashing in 2024 a little bit i'm a little bad with it and try to save money a bit more often oh a budget queen yeah instead of spending 30 on that maybe i put that away you're not avoiding the company you're just avoiding that aspect of your life
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yeah like a little bit is okay i love doordash but like but it can't keep happening the way that it's been happening i'm very bad about like it's literally a restaurant that's right down the street and i'm just like well that's like get your steps in bitch hot girl walk get it like yeah and i do think that's just like a habit that's just like a habit that you can develop or you can undevelop in a bad way so i'm yeah i'm okay i'm adding that one to my list i love that yeah what do you got
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There was a really good quote I saw recently that was like, what would you be doing if you weren't scared of failure and would it be different than what you're currently doing?
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And I was like, whoa, I didn't even realize that I was so scared.
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How dare you say that that could ever happen? You picture her being 80 like, am I the asshole for kicking? I actually think that that would be such a good podcast. I would actually love if you started bringing on just like random grandparents.
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I mean, it's bad. Like you shouldn't do this either way just because they asked you not to. But I do wonder if she's doing it for a gendered reason or if she just thinks it's cute. I don't think that affects like it being just stop doing it. But I'm wondering.
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I could see why she would just think that'd be a cute nickname. That doesn't change my opinion about, like, just stop doing it when the parents tell you to stop.
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cute it's yes you guys it's the bartender from the simpsons i can't that's not what i think of in that nickname no it's just mo no it's kind of cute but like if you don't like it yeah then you know that's thank you that's that's that i think you can do better is the point
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Personal updates? Yeah, what's happening? It's raining. I'm in my vibe. We've been going to that $35 head spa pretty often.
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$100,000 to $200,000 is crazy. Like, she is paying rent. She's helping him pay his mortgage, which is already, like, a very good situation for him. Huge! Like, he doesn't have to pay the entire mortgage on a house that's completely in his name. And his mom's not paying anything. His mom doesn't have to pay anything and she gets to live there. And she's still on the deed. Yeah. Yeah.
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And the girlfriend is buying the groceries. I mean, it sounds like... He's made other comments about making up for her, you know, living there, which I understand like that she is living there and like her paying for some things makes a lot of sense. But he has a great situation here.
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And to have, like, basically your landlord say you need to pay hundreds of thousands of dollars for my house's renovations, which is basically what this is here, is an insane ask. Like, that is for your home. It's your home. And she already compromised. She didn't want to live there.
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You stay clothed and it's a big room of people who are clothed. They might be offering a really shocking discount.
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It was a compromise to even live there. Like now he's just expecting she got her to give in and now he's expecting her to give in more and more and more. The amount to is crazy. The hundreds of thousands of dollars is insane to expect of someone who does not have any ownership of that house.
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yeah i'm kind of confused about the details of that like so curious so she owned the house owned the house own owed like maybe 100k or whatever left he just has to take over the mortgage and then it's and also she gets to keep living there yeah which sounds like a great deal for him and his mom i understand why he would want to do that like that's an incredible price to pay to buy a home
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Yeah. Which for me, ideal situation. Like actually, I prefer that. So paying less for that.
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And you get to live with your mom like that. That's awesome. I would love to do that, too. I know. But if I had a partner to consider and we were talking about doing something together and then to ask them for mortgage payments and groceries and cooking and cleaning and taking care of the dog and hundreds of thousands of dollars renovations like no.
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He has an incredible situation right now. He got like a very good deal on buying a house and his girlfriend is paying helping him pay off the mortgage for it. Uh huh.
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She's seeing. Actually, I made a Reddit account last week and one of the suggested pages to follow is two hot takes. Let's go. And it was like all these very general subjects and then two hot takes. And I was like, OK, I see you, Morgan.
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Yeah, if I go to Raising Cane's and they're like, you know what? We want to we want to build a new iced tea machine and you're going to benefit from it. So you should chip in. I'd be like, well, but it's your iced tea machine. Yes, I'll benefit from it, but it's not mine. I'm actually paying for the iced tea.
Two Hot Takes
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Did he actually say that? He said something like that. Yeah. Look it up. Oh, my God. Maybe like, no, I think it was that. But if not, then it was something very similar to that.
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Yeah. I mean, even if I go to your house and I'm like, wow, it really boosts my mood to see this nice dirt.
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Still won't charge you. You're unbelievably generous in ways that people can't dream of.
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Yeah. He was like, we're still making money. Why would I increase the price? Wow. We don't see that energy enough.
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Obviously, this is, like, a very tough story. The one shining light is that he found out before it seems like anything happened and, like, that this has been brought to light before, you know, anything, like, worse has taken place, you know?
Two Hot Takes
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But this is just, like, so messed up. And, yeah, like, she doesn't know, I guess, the extent of it, but I think you can tell from, like, how...
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from how like vehemently he's probably said it to her and like just from like the subtext and the context clues of like it's a really bad situation like I think it's clear that this isn't just a situation where he doesn't get along with his parents or like you know he just doesn't
Two Hot Takes
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I like that it has these little points at the ends of it that you can kind of push in for the banana. Yeah.
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Even to like bring it up as a conversation with him of like wanting to go see his parents would be like disrespectful, but to not even bring it up and to just do it behind his back. That is insane. And you're just not protecting your kid. For what? Yeah. Like, that... Really, for what? Like, what is she gaining out of that? Like, what even is... Like, she has other people to bring the kid to.
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Like, could it be a misguided... Like, ooh, I want to repair their relationship because I don't know how bad it is. It's not your fucking place. And also have a little bit of sense of, like, this is a serious situation. I'm putting my child in danger and disrespecting my partner. Not just disrespecting. I don't even know what the word is. Like... But worse.
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Clearly they've... I don't know who contacted who first, but clearly they've been having some kind of communication without his knowledge where things are being said that are probably not accurate to the truth of the situation. And conversations that he should...
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be a part not even he should be a part of because they just shouldn't be happening in general but why are you gonna make a three-year-old lie for you yeah oh you have to say you're at at my my parents at grandma and grandpa blah blah blahs and with when instructing him to do that how does she not realize wait like i might be wrong if i'm having to do something like this
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It's very scary for him to be like, I don't know if I can trust having my kid around the mother of my kid now. He's scared about leaving him with her and he's scared that she doesn't have the sense to make decisions to protect him and not only make decisions to protect him, but makes decisions that put him in harm's way. It's a lot at once to be worried about.
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Yeah. So it sounds like the father is being like, I'm dying soon and I want to have a relationship with my grandchild. But he's only contacting her because obviously the father is never going to like, no, forgive him.
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and let him have that relationship he's not entitled to that relationship he can't be trusted did they ever update on like if they've now had that conversation with or sorry i guess it's a girlfriend right not yeah if they've had a conversation with the girlfriend about what happened and like her apologizing and saying she feels bad and like won't do it again
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That should also just be something a normal person would agree to without having to go to court over it. Like, it sucks that it's even at that point where he would have to, like, get a judge to tell her she can't. Like, she should just be like, oh, my God, I had no idea. I'm so sorry. I don't. Like, I really fucked up here. Yeah.
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And, like, that still wouldn't make it okay, but at least, like, he wouldn't have to be so scared going forward.
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Yeah, none of these people know the situation as well as he does. Why do they think their opinion is more important?
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Yeah their ages I like thought about their ages when we first started the story and then that didn't come up again but yeah they were what like 19 and 20 when they first had their son. So this is definitely like a very
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young relationship it's hard because like when i even want to start to be like i guess there's a chance that like she's young and like they manipulated her and made him made her think that like the father the grandfather's dying and it's her only chance to see him but she just like ruins any chance of redemption by still not getting it by not like
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understanding now even after he's told her why it's such a big deal like there are just so many elements here where it's like even if there was a chance for this to just have been some huge terrible mistake she's not even recognizing that like she's still not Like, I guess she kind of apologized, but then she said, but I don't understand why you're so mad.
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I shouldn't have like gone behind your back. I shouldn't have told him to lie. Like, I, I am ignorant. I didn't see the signs. I don't know why I thought I could. Like, I didn't understand the scope of what happened to you. Like, yeah, they're. are potentially things she could have said had she realized the gravity of the situation that could have made it possible for them to repair things, maybe.
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it's people they know yeah it's family members who seem fine they seem very nice like to call to say that they seem fine because they were very nice is just such a naive thing to say like anybody can seem nice it's a murderer could seem nice yeah and they usually do like it's very easy all people who do these things yeah some might have an obviously rancid vibe but most people can make themselves appear very nice especially the ones who are really good at it yeah and
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I think it's also a good moment of him like talking to his son about what bad touches are and like I think it's that can get lost sometimes in conversations we have about like schools and stuff like that of people being like oh don't talk to my kids about that like don't tell them what that is I think it's really important for kids to know that I think it can really like
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help them out in situations to be armed with the information of what a good touch is and what a bad touch is even though they are very young and of course it's uncomfortable because you never want to like think that your child would be exposed to that in any way but it's a good conversation to have and I think that's
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Sometimes you really need friends to tell you you're not being petty. And I've been experiencing that this week as well, where I'm like, I'm overreacting. Am I being an asshole? Like, am I nitpicking? Am I being petty? And hearing it from other people like, no, anyone would be annoyed by that is so helpful. Like, come on. He knows what he's doing. You guys bought a house together.
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Yeah. And it sounds like she very much oversimplified it and was like, oh, he said that living conditions were so bad. But when I went, it was clean. So he must have changed. Like, they must have changed. They must be so great now. I can leave my son there. Like, it's just it's it's so dangerous to have someone like that making decisions for a three year old's life. Like, that's very scary. It's.
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absurd to me and also what's so dangerous is her thinking that she knows like just her like over confidence in the issue and her over i don't know just like the fact that she thinks she knows better than him about his own family enough to make that decision it's so weird yeah it's so weird well i hope we get an update from op yeah i'm like this is just
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I mean, the bare minimum is her saying she'll never do it again. And it's unfortunate that we still haven't gotten that from her.
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You were really brave for also how much you had to speak. I know it was a lot of reading. A lot of reading.
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Yeah, if you're comfortable talking about stranger danger and like, hey, don't get in that car, you can have that conversation too, which you should be.
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Born ready to take the trash out. But I am nervous due to like your vibe about some of these stories about what I'm going to hear.
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Like, who are you trying to impress if not your partner? They're dating, right? Or are they married?
Two Hot Takes
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Okay, wait, why does he think it's going to be two to three days of sickness? Does he have any knowledge of the world? Like, there's what? Who has ever only been sick for two to three days because of cancer? And chemotherapy.
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Why? Like, why is that something that you want other people to perceive?
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208: Take the Trash Out
It sounds like he just in many situations says even if she gives him a task, he just doesn't do it. And then she ends up doing it. So he kind of gets away with it. It's kind of like... Well, it's weaponized incompetence. Oh, 100 percent weaponized incompetence. But even in the situation with cancer, it's like he could say that he's going to be taking up this other work and these other tasks.
Two Hot Takes
208: Take the Trash Out
But also he's outsourcing his jobs. But like now she's picking up an extra job for more spending money. But also the spending money is going toward the stuff he used to do. I don't. Yeah. Even without the cancer. And I think it's important to point that out. Like this is not an OK situation.
Two Hot Takes
208: Take the Trash Out
And it really shows you like that type of partner, what they're going to be like when things get rough and when like you actually have to show up for somebody. Because he wasn't doing it before. Why would he do it now?
Two Hot Takes
208: Take the Trash Out
Not a single mention of him being like worried about her, about him being scared for her, about like, you know, he's not doing this, but he is emotionally been really there for me during this time. Like there's just nothing.
Two Hot Takes
208: Take the Trash Out
Yeah, because when he works from home, the kids are at school. So all he has to do is get them ready for school.
Two Hot Takes
208: Take the Trash Out
I mean, I think this is a really good example of the sentiment that certain relationships can feel lonelier than actually being alone would feel.
Two Hot Takes
208: Take the Trash Out
Well, and it's very tough. It's very tough when you're in that to be like, actually, this is worse. Actually, this is lonelier. Actually, this is more work even like than doing it myself would be. And so I hope the comments just, I hope they eat. I'm sure they do.
Two Hot Takes
208: Take the Trash Out
And if he does leave her while she's sick, or even just like... This might be the moment that she realizes and really like instead of just these slowly doing more and more over time, it's like this big moment of like, OK, actually, he does not do shit for this family. He's going to be the one who suffers when they separate. He's going to be the one who has so much more stuff to do.
Two Hot Takes
208: Take the Trash Out
She is not going to have any more stuff to do because she's already doing it all. I'm so pissed.
Two Hot Takes
208: Take the Trash Out
Yeah, because sometimes the mortgage isn't really that much more than rent would be.
Two Hot Takes
208: Take the Trash Out
Which is why sometimes I'm like, if I could just get the money to put down for a house, like making the difference for a mortgage versus rent really wouldn't be a huge deal. Yeah. And it does make you wonder if it really is just on social media that he devalues her contributions and like sort of overhypes his contributions or if this is something that is a general theme in his personality as well.
Two Hot Takes
208: Take the Trash Out
Yeah, but I think like even what he was doing before she got cancer shows which type of person he is. Totally agree. And unfortunately, like this is going to be his downfall because once they're separated, he is going to be doing all of the shit that right now she does. And he's going to watch the kids alone. He's going to have to clean the house for himself after he leaves.
Two Hot Takes
208: Take the Trash Out
He's going to have to make his own food. He's going to have to make their food when they're there. And you can't do the same kind of weaponized incompetence when it's your own house with no one else to pick up the slack. Like if the trash is getting overfilled, no one else is going to take it out. He's going to have to do it himself.
Two Hot Takes
208: Take the Trash Out
He has time for a nap? He has time for a nap? He has... I don't know who else would love to take a nap.
Two Hot Takes
208: Take the Trash Out
Because he just keeps taking a little bit more over time and over time. And like, actually now this job is your job. And actually now this job is a landscaping company's job. And actually like now you're getting another job and I'm still not. And like over time, he's just done less and less and less and less. And he's comfortable with that. And it just doesn't get done unless she does it.
Two Hot Takes
208: Take the Trash Out
Oh, brother. You want to see these hands? Catch these hands. Catch them. You're lucky other things aren't happening with these hands. That is an insane thing. That honestly feels like what would be a quote on like a TV show that would really piss people off. And I'd be like, all right, they're pushing it. Like who really talks like that?
Two Hot Takes
208: Take the Trash Out
Yeah. No, it's like horrible timing. It's going to pay off for the rest of her life to separate from this man and rebuild. But unfortunately, the timing of it happening also when she has cancer and like really could be using that support. It really sucks. But like sometimes... You can go through something really hard and it actually feels like, thank God I'm not still with that person.
Two Hot Takes
208: Take the Trash Out
Because even though I'm doing it alone, like doing it with them would have been worse. Because he would have also been giving her little comments like, why aren't you better yet? Like, are you really not going to be doing this? Like, it's the opposite of helpful.
Two Hot Takes
208: Take the Trash Out
Mm-hmm. Because that's his designated time. Like she has so many designated times. It sounds like as soon his only designated time is like right before they leave. And then when they get home from school and she's home, it sounds like everything is on her. All he has to do is take care of like a little bit during weekdays when they're not even home. Like he doesn't even have to be watching them.
Two Hot Takes
208: Take the Trash Out
Yeah, like how he described it, like, personally over text to them.
Two Hot Takes
208: Take the Trash Out
Oh, wow. But in that last comment, she was like, this might have been the wake-up call I needed.
Two Hot Takes
208: Take the Trash Out
She's told him, like, this isn't easy for her either. Like, this isn't an ideal scenario for her either. No. And the fact that he thinks that him poking at her and making rude comments is going to help her want to have sex with him more is so stupid. In front of other people, too. In front of other people. Like, it's something very personal. It's something that she's not feeling great about.
Two Hot Takes
208: Take the Trash Out
Like there are so many medical situations going on with her right now. Like he started these comments in December. Her surgery was sometime in October. Like she was still healing at that point. She was still going through the hormones of her birth control not working. Like what could possibly possess you to be like making backhanded comments about her going through a medical crisis?
Two Hot Takes
208: Take the Trash Out
Yeah. She's not even saying, like, she has a very low libido and this is usually an issue. Like, this is something that's happening because of a very specific reason and... And, like, if this is the love of your life, why would that be what matters most to you? Like, why is that the main thing? Plenty of people all the time go months without having sex. I've gone years. Hey, I've gone years.
Two Hot Takes
208: Take the Trash Out
I've been fine. I mean, I'm a different person. But, like, it's not going to kill you. You're not entitled to sex.
Two Hot Takes
208: Take the Trash Out
But he's posting on social media about the new house that he bought, which doesn't feel that private to me.
Two Hot Takes
208: Take the Trash Out
So I am very curious. Does she ever say like what kind of comments and like jokes he's making? Like, does she ever give an example?
Two Hot Takes
208: Take the Trash Out
Her body has got a hole in it. And you want to have sex with her? Let her heal. I just... I don't understand it. And also, being disappointed that you can't have sex with your partner is one thing. And there are normal feelings to that. Of being like, ah, shoot. One element of this horrible situation is that we can't have sex for a bit. Yeah. But like...
Two Hot Takes
208: Take the Trash Out
People can find that so easily now. Like even just, yeah, with a reverse Google image search, you don't even have to be talented at finding people and hunting them down. It's insane.
Two Hot Takes
208: Take the Trash Out
to take it out on her and to make that the main issue of this like huge physical life event and to, I don't know, make her feel worse when it's already a rough situation. Like, what do you think that's going to do for you?
Two Hot Takes
208: Take the Trash Out
i really think some people don't even like their partners i'm like i don't think he likes you yeah i genuinely like i don't think he likes you i think he just found it convenient to have a lot of sex it's like an early version of the last story but like you're just finding it out sooner that this person isn't showing up for you literally and won't and will get worse over time you think they get better over time haven't seen that happen
Two Hot Takes
208: Take the Trash Out
Every time in one of these stories, people are like, I was a little petty. Like, you were right. You should have been more petty. You should have doubled down on being petty. Like, what the fuck? If someone's he's never offered to do anything for her in return for five miles every single day for two years.
Two Hot Takes
208: Take the Trash Out
And we talked about this on another episode we did where it's like sometimes you do something for your friends and you don't even think about it, but then they won't do something for you in return that makes you realize, like, oh, like, have you never noticed that I do that for you? Like, does that not mean anything? Like...
Two Hot Takes
208: Take the Trash Out
obviously you don't do things for other people just so that they notice and like are grateful and do things back but like it still feels nice yeah to be like appreciated also this is one dollar knowledge yeah one dollar and it was borrow it's not like hey can i have a dollar it's like hey can you just spot me like i'm gonna pay you back losing free rides over one dollar it's a dollar so you know how much that uber home is gonna be
Two Hot Takes
208: Take the Trash Out
Yeah. And then the value is bound to change over time. So is that in the mathematics of it all? Like will you just get that amount you paid back back? Or like if it changes by $2,000, will you then get that like extra $2,000 back?
Two Hot Takes
208: Take the Trash Out
that they they do really stay rich with that mindset like sometimes the people who are the luckiest and have the best situations are the most stingy and like find ways to get so much free stuff from other people without ever helping them in return and the rich stay rich i'll tell you that that's not a world i want to live in i know i mean i don't know his financial situation but i know that kind of person like we went when we got our massages like you bought my little raisin canes and that was really nice you give me stuff all the time but
Two Hot Takes
208: Take the Trash Out
Because I think it should feel natural in your mind of like, oh, this person like does stuff for me a lot. I want to do stuff for them, too. Like to never acknowledge that someone does something for you. I don't know. Wouldn't be me. And yeah, why keep doing it? It's like, okay, you haven't acknowledged at all that I'm doing you a favor for two years.
Two Hot Takes
208: Take the Trash Out
You fucked up. I hope it stays. I hope it lasts. I do appreciate this being a lighthearted, fun story.
Two Hot Takes
208: Take the Trash Out
After two years of giving me rides? Yeah, no one's going to hear that and be like... And I think that that can be a really good way of thinking about things when you're having a conflict with, like, a coworker or a friend or whatever. Like, if this person were to repeat this story to someone else, would it make me look bad? No, it wouldn't because I didn't do anything wrong.
Two Hot Takes
208: Take the Trash Out
I don't even understand why this happened. Like, you already had plans. Why would you just be like, actually, I'm going to invite my mom and sister instead? Can't take you, babe. Just do something else with them the next day. Do you believe that he's actually taking his mom and sister? You beg the question.
Two Hot Takes
208: Take the Trash Out
And to do it after she's already so excited, like, she found an outfit, she planned it. Yeah. Like, she's put everything in place so that this is the night that she's going to have and is accommodated for this to be the night that you guys were going to have together. Like, it just doesn't make any sense. No. Like, you have all the time in the world.
Two Hot Takes
208: Take the Trash Out
It's not like your mom and sister are visiting from somewhere else and it's the only night you can spend with them. Like, you made this plan with your girlfriend.
Two Hot Takes
208: Take the Trash Out
Yeah if they were to have gone in completely 50-50 it wouldn't have been so stressful figuring out what would happen.
Two Hot Takes
208: Take the Trash Out
Yeah, doing it the day of is crazy. You can so easily in that situation be like, well, I have plans tonight, but now I'll know if it's a good place and I can give you recommendations when we go next week. Like, it doesn't have to be this whole thing where you cancel on her last minute that day. Also, don't you want to hang out with your girlfriend? Yeah, you would think so. You would think.
Two Hot Takes
208: Take the Trash Out
During the breakup but like her completely covering that down payment. And then he has. Yeah. I just don't like that. And I don't like so many people on the Internet. And it's like it is a lot of people, but it's also probably mostly just the people he actually knows. Unless this guy's like an influencer, which I don't. It doesn't sound like that's the thing.
Two Hot Takes
208: Take the Trash Out
Yeah, I mean, that still would have been a little bit annoying, but it wouldn't have been as bad.
Two Hot Takes
208: Take the Trash Out
Yeah. I mean, he doesn't have to cancel on his mom and sister just like he doesn't have to cancel on her. Just like stick to your plans and then it won't be this whole catch up thing.
Two Hot Takes
208: Take the Trash Out
So, like, why don't the people in your life know about her if she's serious enough that you're moving in together? You're buying a house together. Yeah. Yeah.
Two Hot Takes
208: Take the Trash Out
They live with him? Okay, you gotta be kidding. Like, wait, they live with him? They live with him. Casually dropping that.
Two Hot Takes
208: Take the Trash Out
Okay, call me tinfoil hat, call me a little bit crazy, maybe, but it's still suspicious to me. Like, they both fell asleep? Like, I don't know. I think there's still a slight chance. There's another woman. But like, I think you might be onto it. I don't know. It's just like, OK, both of them fell asleep and you had to go with them and they guilted you so hard, even though you live with them.
Two Hot Takes
208: Take the Trash Out
And like, if you live with them, wouldn't you just go with them?
Two Hot Takes
208: Take the Trash Out
I would just... Wake their asses up. Yeah. I just wouldn't write it off. I would investigate further. Of course, there's still... the more likely chance that that's actually what happened. But it's just very odd. It's so odd to me.
Two Hot Takes
208: Take the Trash Out
Sorry, babe. Both of them fell asleep. And like, now I'm just here alone. So I can't show you them on FaceTime.
Two Hot Takes
208: Take the Trash Out
And you're the one that's far away. It should be, like, such a priority to see...
Two Hot Takes
208: Take the Trash Out
Yeah, he's got his hands full. He doesn't have time for a girlfriend. It sounds like he's already got a very complicated home life to deal with. And he seems to like it that way. I know.
Two Hot Takes
208: Take the Trash Out
Yeah, I mean, it's not like the worst thing in the world to do to somebody, but I just also don't think that it can continue like that.
Two Hot Takes
208: Take the Trash Out
Just to feel like you're not at all a priority to your partner is, like, that just can't continue.
Two Hot Takes
208: Take the Trash Out
Yeah. I mean, it is it is a little sad the first time your child spends Thanksgiving or Christmas with their partner or their partner's family instead of you. Like that is a normal thing to be sad about. But it's also like what's going to happen? Like you're you're not going to get every holiday. You're not going to get every date night. Things change.
Two Hot Takes
208: Take the Trash Out
So is it a joke or is it a compliment? Like, is it a joke or is it something that she should take as a compliment because he's contradicting himself when he's explaining it? Like, I didn't mean that, but also you should be happy that that's the case.
Two Hot Takes
208: Take the Trash Out
That would be so embarrassing that he would make the post being like, yay, I bought this house. And then if you look at his girlfriend's page, it's like, we bought this house.
Two Hot Takes
208: Take the Trash Out
yeah what's what you committed to me my thought like isn't this a commitment and it feels like it also i mean it's like a fucked up comment regardless but i do feel like it also hit home a little bit in the sense that like they have been together three years and there probably haven't been a lot of mentions of a further commitment with marriage on the table i guess
Two Hot Takes
208: Take the Trash Out
Well, it's another contradiction because it... Didn't he point her out because she was attractive, but then he said... That it was a compliment for his girlfriend because guys usually sleep with girls they find attractive. So then are you trying to say the girl on TV wasn't attractive? Because that's not what you made it sound like.
Two Hot Takes
208: Take the Trash Out
No, it looks like the banana looks like it's jizzing. I know. I looked down and I said, wait a minute. Okay. Damn. They are very fragile. Well, now I can return it. That one extra story, like... Put us over the edge.
Two Hot Takes
208: Take the Trash Out
Because it's gross. It's gross that you even have that mindset about women anyway. Like, looking at them on TV and being like, oh, would only sleep with her. Like, first of all, I don't want to hear that in general.
Two Hot Takes
208: Take the Trash Out
Yeah. Yeah. Hey, and even if it really is just a joke, it's OK if you don't want to be with someone who makes jokes like that.
Two Hot Takes
208: Take the Trash Out
It's OK if that's like something that makes you uncomfortable. You've tried to tell him you don't like it. It hasn't changed. And that's a deal breaker for you. Like even if it's a joke, like you don't have to be OK with that because not everyone makes jokes like that. At your expense. Nope. Hey, what day is trash day?
Two Hot Takes
208: Take the Trash Out
We got one of the boxes of croissants at our house, but like we could not. Oh, I give them away. That's, you have to do that because.
Two Hot Takes
208: Take the Trash Out
Yeah, it's sort of getting like the best case scenario with this girl because she's comfortable with him not posting her. She's comfortable with paying the majority of things and him like getting the clout for it, I guess, if clout's the word for your friends and family, but.
Two Hot Takes
208: Take the Trash Out
Yeah, if you can't see us, we have stress fruit in our hands. Stress fruit. We're squeezing it.
Two Hot Takes
208: Take the Trash Out
Like if there's any time you're going to post about your partner, it's when you're posting about buying a new house and you did it together. As a couple. This is literally the time. But that's understandable that you would be like bamboozled by that. I think we've all, I think we've all fallen for things that sound really obvious.
Two Hot Takes
208: Take the Trash Out
My ex used photos that I took of him on his Tinder profile while we were together.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
She is not being careful on any front, like doing this on a computer that everyone in her family has access to, like on the family business computer and not like having safe sex. Yeah. And now it's like, what did you give him?
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
You know what? Like that's sort of White Lotus, too, where it's like people can take it as sort of this deeper show, which it can be a little bit, but then you might get disappointed by it if that's your expectation going in. But if you just go in expecting like, you know what, I'm going to get to see other people's lives and like the messy things going on in them.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
Yeah, I guess she could go live with one of those 20-year-olds. Like, what the fuck? Sorry. What the fuck? I did not see this coming. No, I didn't expect her to be... Honestly, when you first read the title, I actually thought... I didn't realize the mother-in-law and the boss were the same person. So I thought her mother-in-law was, like, cheating with her boss or something.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
I did not expect there to be this, like... Power dynamic, like, disgusting element to it.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
And it's going to feel like I'm kind of spying on other people, like people watching. That's yes. Yeah. And that's so fun.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
If you're not watching the video version of this episode, like Morgan drinking her coffee like he's in a red solo cup and it's just really comical.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
Yeah, there are things that can... be found out very quickly these days especially i think like if you do blood tests it's faster or like your analysis or something yeah your analysis when i was working in the emergency room your analysis come back really fast right really fast like it's faster than getting tested for um other diseases yeah
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
Oh, yeah. Like I work with my brother and I literally am logged into his Instagram, his Facebook, one of his emails. Like like if you work with people, a lot of the time you have to share stuff like that. And then things if if there are things to be found, like unfortunately that might pop up. That's not her fault at all.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
And it's why reality TV is so fun. Like it is a little bit silly and stupid, but it's also psychology a bit. It's like interesting to see people interact with each other. I think it's very like human to be interested in other people's stories. So essentially like we're doing big things here. Essentially like you're getting a PhD right now. Yeah.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
Also, like anyone going there to like this horrendous behavior and being like, actually, it's your fault for finding out about it. Come on.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
Like, this father-in-law, he got an STI. Yeah, and if those—I don't know which one it was, but, like, if they go untreated for a long time, it can get more dangerous. Absolutely. Like, his health was actually at risk. I honestly, like—my biggest question is, is there any update about how he's doing? I know it hasn't been that long, like, since he found out, so—
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
I also wonder because he suspected some years ago if there was any relief at finding out because I since he was cheated on in the past there might have been years now where he's thought oh I'm just so wounded from my past that I'm like being crazy I'm thinking things out of nothing and like this is just how I am and this is on me and maybe like
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
getting that concrete proof that like, oh, no, you're not crazy because he was already kind of feeling those feelings. Yeah. I wonder if that might help him to move on easier.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
Yeah. And now I have answers. There's something validating about learning that actually your gut feeling was right and that you should trust your gut and you can trust your gut and you weren't being like crazy years ago. And these bad feelings that you had were real feelings. Yeah. Because it's almost like I can't trust that person, but I at least found out I can trust myself. Yeah.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
And now all of your relationships are ruined. Yeah. I also think him testing positive for an STI is further proof of like why it is important to share that information. Exactly.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
Almost all STIs are very common, and, like, getting one isn't really the issue. It's, like, not treating it that's the issue. No.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
I think I saw something about it and they were like, oh, we were wasting like five million a year on guinea pigs that have gonorrhea. And it's like, actually, no, they were like using that as a testing to then treat gonorrhea in humans. Like it's just.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
And don't drink on them. I did that once. It was bad. Were you seeing things, little hallucinations? I think I just kind of blacked out and had a really bad hangover the next day. This was in college when I was just a mess. You're out there. I was out there.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
I need to know. Put us directly into your relationship or situation and give us all of the details.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
Miley Cyrus song. Don't you wish that you could be a fly on the wall?
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
What's going on here? What's the scoop, Mikayla? Morgan, what's going on here? Where's the poop, OP? Literally, I was thinking that the entire time you were telling this story. I was like, what? Is he getting sick? Right. Air quotes, sick?
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
Oh, no, it's like a B-side. It's like a B-side Miley Cyrus song. Oh, my gosh. How old is that? I don't like at least like 20 years, probably. I hope it's Miley Cyrus. We make sure.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
Yeah, because she's the one like planning it out and and getting really excited to do all these things. And it sounds like he has no involvement in the planning process of like, oh, I want to go see this and like go on this excursion and do this. But I guess what I'm struggling with is like, I don't understand really what he would get out of it. Like, what would he get out of it?
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
If I were sick on vacation with somebody, like whether it be a partner or a friend, I would be like, please like do all of the things that we were going to do. Like unless I'm dying and I need assistance. But like if I just want to be home because I'm tired and I'm like not feeling well, like you should still go on that like cruise and you should still go on that.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
I don't like excursion like you should still go to that hike.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
Also, when you're going on vacation with someone like you see how excited they are to do these certain things. And I can't imagine not encouraging them to still do that thing that they've been probably talking about to you for weeks now. Like, I'm so excited to see the red pandas and blah, blah, blah. And then like that day comes and you're not like, go, go, like, go without me.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
You're so excited to do that. You're saying stay here. I love red pandas. That's why it came to mind.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
Oh my god. What? Yeah. That's not normal. It's starting to get very emotional. He just has like a sore throat and a bit of a fever? Fuck up. At first, I was like, well, I guess if you're traveling, like, you can get a lot of stuff on planes sometimes. Like, traveling can... Absolutely. You're in this, like, little space with a lot of people. But, like, it wouldn't show up the first day.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
And also... The way that he acts about it is just not normal.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
Yeah, there's no, well, she's not referencing like he is someone who gets sick a lot.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
But, like, does he just get tired of it and then he doesn't want her to enjoy it without him? Like...
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
Yeah, I just like don't understand that, especially again, putting myself into his shoes. If I were to have done this to my partner now three times and like on the third time, I'm still telling them, no, you have to stay with me. Like, no, I just don't understand how they don't feel guilty and like weird about that.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
Yeah. Ruining the design, I feel, is such a good visual representation of what this guy is doing. And it was like it was an expensive ass latte. Of like just ruining something. I mean, I guess it wasn't entirely just because it might bring her joy, but I think that might be an element of what's going on in this story. And it also reminded me of another story you and I shared.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
And I think I think the woman was like traveling for a sister's wedding or something and he canceled her tickets. Yes.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
Yeah. And it's just sort of like behavior that gets worse and worse and like controlling in little ways. And you might not always see it immediately because you might not even be in situations. Right off the bat. Yes.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
Right. Like when I was in college my first year, I didn't even go to a party one time. But then the first time I did, my boyfriend acted really weird about it. And I was like, oh, like. I didn't even know you had that in you because I've never tried to do this thing. Yeah. But sometimes it takes certain situations to start bringing these behaviors out. That's so true.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
Which is why I would be so interested from Opie to hear like if there's anything else he does that's weird when they're back home. But yeah, it feels reminiscent of other stories that we've discussed of like escalating behavior.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
If he were just getting sick but telling her to go out and enjoy it and have fun, then I maybe would just be like, oh, he has a really shitty immune system. I think the element that's really confusing to me is just putting myself in those shoes, how weird it would be to tell someone to not enjoy their time and to not leave me alone.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
No, it's never anything where it's like, oh, he was vomiting or like there were these physical signs.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
Yeah. If I have a cold, sometimes it's nice for my mom to make me soup, you know, and like be there for a little bit. But then, you know, go back to your room and I'm going to sleep.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
Yeah, I definitely have a bit of surveillance paranoia, I feel. So I really do relate to her in this. This is creepy. I get very scared, especially if I'm watching a scary show or something. That someone's either in the house or someone could be watching. Or like if I'm at an Airbnb, like I check for cameras. Like I definitely have always, it started when I was younger with religion.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
And now I think like God was watching. But now it's like someone. But I don't think like Bailey's is a super like Irish coffee. I don't think that's super common.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
Does she have like does she have a big window in her living room? I would wonder because people's addresses are public information. Like it's really not a huge stretch to think that like obviously we don't know this kid and I'm not saying that this is anything about him. But just for anyone, it's not that hard to.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
To look up someone's name on the white pages online and figure out their address or even like their phone number or anything like that. Which you can use an app called like Delete Me to get that stuff removed. Or like you could physically request from each website that they remove your information if you want to. But if you don't opt out, like that's the default that it's all on there.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
So it's not crazy to be like, oh, maybe he's gone to her house sometime and like looked at her through her window. I mean, yeah.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
High school students can do that. I mean, the only thing I can think of, but I would think that she would
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
come up with this idea if it were the case like if she ever posted you know a picture like a story on Instagram of her like you know like a selfie of like finally settling in after a long day and like watching my favorite show or I don't know something like that like if it's just social media stalking yeah but I but I do believe like I think so, too. Yeah.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
If someone were around my house right now and looking at me, I would have gotten a notification. I would know. I would see it. I can physically see that there's been nobody at my windows or my doors the past 24 hours. That would feel good. I would also just like... Obviously, this is a very low chance of it happening, but I would check the house for cameras.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
There also are apps where you connect it to the Wi-Fi and then it can tell you every single device that's on the Wi-Fi. Oh, I like that. So if there's like a camera or like a webcam on the Wi-Fi, because obviously it would need to be live stream or like it would need to be connected to like the network and it would be the same network you are on.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
So it'll like show you every device on your network and like if it's currently active.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
Like, if you can get one of the ring or whatever, the blink ones. I love my Yuffies.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
Absolutely. And, like, he would benefit from it, too. Like, it's just safe to have that. Especially, like, hey... Your wife is alone sometimes. You should want her to feel safe. And also you can feel like she's safe. That should make you feel good, too. But I don't know. I understand her. I literally passed.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
I was driving yesterday and I passed a spy store and it literally was like called the spy store. And I was like, first of all, I need to go there sometime. But also, I think it's just a testament to how many ways people can camouflage a camera now.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
The... God, is it Giselle Petticoat? The one whose husband... Yes, the French woman. The way that he got found out was because he was sliding, like, his camera underneath girls' skirts at a department store, and a guy who worked there insisted on, like, one of them filing charges. Yeah. And they saw him doing it on the camera. But like you just have to be aware of your surroundings.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
And it sucks because there are so many methods now to being creeps. I know there's also an element of like seeing it online makes you think it's more prevalent than it is. But I don't think it's like bad to be careful. I don't either.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
Yeah. I mean, at the end of the day, there's always a small chance that it was a guess and that it's a crazy guess and somehow he figured it out. Or maybe he did see her at...
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
the store and then guess the rest of it or whatever like of course there's a small chance that that's a possibility but I don't think it hurts to just get cameras in your house check for cameras already existing um maybe remove your address from those websites like those things don't hurt you yeah so smart you a lot of good recommendations Michaela okay so let's get into some comments from OP here
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
Like, if there's cameras in her home... Right. How the fuck did they get there? That's, like, not the end of the story. That's not like, oh, we found them. Now we're safe because we removed them. You have to find out, like, how they got in.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
I'm so sorry that happened to you. If anyone deserves it, it's everyone else. Thank you, Mikayla.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
Which... I'm glad she already changed the locks. She said that right. She's getting them changed. She's getting the locks changed. I also think there's an element of this of, like, it's a woman talking about these concerns to her husband, who is a man who's probably never really thinking about this kind of thing. Like, she's brought it up in person to people who...
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
You know, they just don't have to worry about being followed or like being attacked or whatever in the same way. And they're not vulnerable in the same way.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
mm-hmm oh and that's why like gossip between women is an evolutionary way we keep each other alive like gossip is important gossip gab yes don't gatekeep yeah cheese mousse i want the cheese my
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
I mean, yeah, I would have all of my friends come over and we turn off the lights and we all are looking with flashlights. We're like you. I mean, like you have to take out sometimes the lighting fixtures, look under the lighting fixtures.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
There are definitely videos on TikTok, I think, of like people. Yeah. Or like what they do when they enter a hotel room or an Airbnb for the first time, like all of the places they look. And it would be places that someone would expect would get a view of what they're trying to get, you know? So like your random shoe closet probably doesn't have one in there because what would they get from that?
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
But like in your bathroom with a good view of like the toilet and the shower, like that would be the first place to look. I hope that's not the case. But like, I mean, it would just give so much peace of mind if you did look at all these things. I think it's more likely the window or like the recycling bin theory.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
I'm so excited to go home and have Bailey's in front of my new TV and my dressing robe. Also, why would anyone opt for a longer sentence that's more specific with all of these extra words than just saying relax with a glass of wine? Like they know don't opt for these really adjective riddled sentences with all these extra details for no reason.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
Well, actually, I did see this on Law & Order SVU a couple weeks ago. There was an... Oh, my God. No, there wasn't. It's like you just buy a smoke detector that's a camera and you just like twist it in. But don't you have to unplug wires and like know how to like... Like shut the breaker off? Because it might not even be like a working smoke detector that they put in there.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
It's just something to look like a smoke detector. So they don't even need to do the wiring.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
No, I feel like she needs to get him arrested before tipping him off. That way there's a chance that like this could all be deleted before he could like send it anywhere or anything.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
Dude, I actually want to cry right now. Like that's so violating and scary. And I mean, she's a teacher. Like she needs to be taken seriously. She needs to be like respected. Like this is also, I don't know, kind of a threat to her career with these like kids potentially passing around videos of her in her most like private, intimate moments. Like that's just so terrible.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
I would definitely like search his phone and his credit card history as well and see if there's any like. Yeah. Anything that stands out because it would be very scary to like then always wonder that. Yeah. Hopefully, when they do question these kids, they find out how they did it. Like maybe the answer is, oh, I was just watching a live stream.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
And then now that opens up all of these questions with the people she actually knows. Or maybe they say, oh, you know, like the door was open. And then, you know, that's still bad. But at least she doesn't have to wonder about anyone who has access to her home. You know, that's very scary, though. And unfortunately, like.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
One of the saddest things about these situations is that it's so often the person you trust the most. But I don't know, like high school kids can be really...
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
evil like I was never evil in high school but I'm certainly a much better person than I was then and then like I you know you think about other people and like before your frontal lobe develops and before you really like I mean this happens at a different rate for everybody but before you have empathy for other people in the same way and like understand that other people are just as complex of human beings as you are like there there are
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
There can be very bad high schoolers who are capable of bad things. And what's crazy is that would be the best case scenario for her at this point.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
Oh my God, I can't believe it ended like that. Like that's just... There's no other comments, no further updates. That's all we got. But I wasn't expecting to get that much, honestly.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
Somehow. Next story. Somehow. Somehow. You know, like, the bees are different in different regions because there used to just be, like, these docile... This is gonna, like, sound bad. Oh, that you learned at the pollen club! Yes! There were, like, these docile, like, European bees, but then there are these more violent... bees from Africa came up and they're like the killer bees. Yeah. Yeah.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
The killer bees. And they like mate with the European bees. And now we have so many of those. But there used to be like bees that like didn't really sting. And there still are in some parts of the U.S. And it's like obviously places that are colder because they're from like a warmer climate.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
I've always said that about wasps. What's up with that? Fuck the wasps. This has been such an informative episode.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
So, yeah. I'm going to kill them. Yeah. And you're going to feel good about it. I will. You're going to be happy. I am. No better feeling in the world, she said. Well.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
As opposed to all those... Uterus-less gold diggers out there. Yeah. She's got a... Got to specify.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
Okay, so she hasn't at this point like said anything to anybody. I'm such a like I would want to know person and I... Are you a person who would want to know? Oh, I'm a nosy motherfucker. Look at me in this show. I'm so nosy. Also like having the two hot takes subreddit is so perfect for the insider scoop. I feel because... Insider info. Absolutely. Like these people respond to you. I love them.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
You are a little bit of an asshole, but it's like you are allowed to be a little bit of an asshole. Like, it's obviously not a nice comment. Like, it isn't a nice thing to say to a child. However, like, is it okay for someone to be pushed to their limit and, like, have a reaction that isn't 100% the most mature sometimes? Yeah. I think so.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
Yeah, I guess the first half... Doesn't really make sense. Like, why did you because she didn't say you're not my mom. And then you said, you're right, I'm not like she said something completely different. And then you're like, I am not your mother. I know. I guess. How long has she been this kid's step parent?
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
she does in the way she talks sound pretty resentful of being the mother figure in this kid's life and if that's coming through in this reddit post like i would imagine that there's an element of this coming through to the daughter you know like like there are just little ways of how she's talking about it where i'm like oh you you don't love this kid you completely.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
Okay, yeah, like definitely say something. I guess the question is like, does she say something to the mother-in-law first or to her husband first?
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
And I think that that's been obvious. The uterus is so... Is there a reason that she said that? What also is sad is that that is a very misogynistic ideal about stepmothers and just women in general. And it's sad that a child is hearing this and a girl child is hearing this. And
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
internalizing that about her own gender and like thinking these things about her stepmother and unfortunately like children are more susceptible I think to those types of ideas and beliefs and it's not her like the child's fault that the adults are saying that to her and now she's repeating it but like
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
My first instinct would be like, hey, like that is in a way that we should view women, you know.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
I don't need this. I feel like I understand this stepmom's frustration to an extent about constantly doing what she can and kind of feeling... you know, not appreciated and like she'll never like fill the place that she's sort of trying to fill. Yeah. But I also feel that her beef is actually with the mother.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
your mom sucks, but you seem to respect her more than you respect me. And like, I'm the one who's showing up, even though like you were not originally my child, but like still you take her word over mine. And like, I think there's a lot of feelings over years, which obviously she can't say because this is a child. And like, this was a snapping moment.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
Oh, shit. Oh, that really made me feel like, oh, maybe actually it's not that she is a gold digger with the uterus, but she is being treated in this family like she is just like a uterus. I don't know. I guess we'll need more.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
But that's why this is why kids and teenagers are so difficult to deal with, because they can be meaner than anyone else in the world. But then it's like, oh, but I still have to.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
Yeah. I think that there's a lot more context to the burdens that this woman has taken on in the family and like the role that she's been pushed into by marrying this man. And it sounds like
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
he isn't very supportive like i i feel like this problem should have been addressed before it gotten to this point by like you know her father like her actual father and been like hey you need to respect her more i will say like my first reaction again would be like i probably need to sit down with this child and have a talk about misogyny and like the way that we view women in society and like try to release her from these clutches before she's an adult too be gone satan
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
And it's like how long and how many years and how much time have you put into this family and you're still being treated like an outsider and you're still being treated like the help in a way.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
Yeah, I think that's an interesting way to look at it. Like, why was there even time for this woman to respond instead of the father stepping in, one of the other family members stepping in? Not appropriate. Apologize. Like, they should have...
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
And it's easier for, I think, us to judge her reaction and be like, oh, her response wasn't perfect. Like her response was a little bit rude and bitchy too. Yeah. But like we haven't experienced these years of being disrespected and belittled and like kept out and doing your best and putting in all this time and effort.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
Yeah, exactly. So I kind of go back to like my initial feeling, which was like, Even though it was an asshole comment, it was like maybe at that point she just kind of needed to be an asshole because she's been belittled for so long.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
It's a very messy, just like real world situation where maybe no one is entirely right. And it's just too complicated with these years of feelings intertwined and everything.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
There's like an off chance. I mean, it's still morally possible. Due to the age and like the working for the power imbalance. But like I think as a family, they could probably I don't know if they would ever see her. They wouldn't ever probably see her the exact same way they did before. But like they could maybe still have a relationship if this is like an open marriage situation.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
Like if someone told me, you know, picture a five-year-old, I would not know what to picture. I don't know what that looks like.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
If she has never been bitchy to this 15-year-old before... Not the asshole. Oh, my God. I've driven my mother to, like, saying things probably that she wishes she hadn't said. My mom's never said, like, horrible, horrible things to me.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
But, like, there are definitely things where, like, I pushed her to a point of, like, not acting like a perfect, polished, like, angelic... A lot of people have told their parents, I hate you. Right. Absolutely. Like, that...
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
that might also be part of what's going on here of like this child isn't getting that from her actual mom. So maybe it's like I can push this other parent figure and they're not leaving me. And it proves that like they will put up with my shit.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
Or this is the only parent she can act out to without like the fear of abandonment that she has with the other ones. Like this might be the only parent that she isn't afraid to say these things to. I think so. For fear of rejection.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
But if she is acting out because she wants like that proof that... Then her being like, I'm not your mom is probably the worst response she could have gotten. And it makes sense that she started crying and ran away.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
That could be the case. Also, can I just say like the mail app on MacBooks is so useless. Like no one is used. I do not know a single person. I go to Gmail.com. It's so annoying. I go to Gmail.com. I am not using the mail app. And look what it did.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
This one's kind of this is very confusing. Like I feel like I'm missing something. Well, that's the point of the episode. Because at first I was like, oh, I guess like maybe it's happy tears. Like maybe it's happy tears that this kid that she knew that was in a really hard situation is posting really happy and saying like breaking the cycle and like. going on to live a beautiful life.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
Is there something like in her own life that this is like bringing up for her that she hasn't healed and she's like, I don't know, like I'm very confused.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
Or was it maybe like a one sided thing? Like maybe, you know, there were feelings that weren't acted upon. And I mean, there's always like the joke about the very homoerotic best friend breakup or like, you know. Maybe a girl doesn't even realize that she's gay, but she has a very intense friendship with another girl.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
And when they have a fight, it hits so hard and it's world ending and like devastating and like they don't even know. So I guess it could be sort of like this unspoken thing of, you know, she doesn't even realize why it's hitting her so hard. And like she just has all these feelings, but she doesn't know how to categorize them. It's a really good, really good take.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
Wait, she's literally living out Chapel Rowan's good luck, babe. Like, when you wake up next to him in the middle of the night.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
I don't know. Like, that's one situation. I guess another could be if they went through something really horrible together and, like, seeing each other just brought back those memories too much. And that's why they stopped. Like, I know some...
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
Like siblings, sometimes if they go through a really abusive relationship with their parents, like sometimes it's harder even to like see the sibling in the future. Like sometimes you associate a person with a really bad time in your life. That's true, too. I guess there are these like other possible situations. And I hope that she opens up to her husband about what it is.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
But it also could be she doesn't even know why. She's having this reaction and it's I know.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
Yeah, just use your phone. I didn't even like consider how much this could screw up her relationships if she were to take this information to them and then the mother-in-law denied it and like hid all the proof before she could.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
And I don't want I don't want you. Sort of like the dynamic between the stepdaughter and the stepmom from that last story of like you put so much into someone and you care for them. But like. At the end of the day, I mean, I there are certain times in my life where people knew me and it's like now if I were to see them, they might still see me as that person.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
They might still, you know, when they're looking at me, they don't see me the way I am now. So I don't really want to see them. And maybe there's an element of that in this relationship of like, I just don't want to be around people who knew me at my darkest point. And I could see that.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
yeah i guess like that's a valid possibility but i do feel like that would be easier for the wife to say to her husband than you know maybe some other things like i don't know it's possible it's not where my mind goes immediately but like yeah that's definitely a possibility
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
Oh, my gosh. Yeah. I mean, there are so many possibilities here.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
I don't know if that's true. I mean, I guess, yeah, maybe.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
My mind went to the story we did earlier with like some kind of photo of her or something like getting out there, like some kind of revenge porn type situation.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
Yeah, it's definitely uncovered very intense feelings that she's had buried for a while, whether those be like romantic heartbreak or just like a really hard platonic heartbreak or something terrible happening that they both experienced. I don't know. Or I guess the kids thing.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
But I also just feel like... People's comments. Of course, like, people have regret and stuff, but I do feel like if a woman is very adamant that she doesn't want kids... we should believe her. And people like don't think that men will have that same regret, which is why like it's so much easier for like men to get vasectomies and stuff.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
Whereas like for women to get their tubes tied, like a lot of doctors won't do it. And like people don't believe women when they say they don't want kids. Yeah. And I do think that that's a problem.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
And while that's like a possibility that she is experiencing that regret and that that can happen, I'm like, I just like don't want to immediately go there because like if she's consistently said that and she's never showed any type of
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
Yeah. Or even just the heartbreak of like, wow, like people can really go on and have this beautiful life. And you thought that they were so important to you and that you were so important to them. But you're not getting those updates anymore. Like you're out getting married and you're finding out from this Instagram post.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
Yeah. Well, I think that's why it's specified romantic and sexual interactions. Like it's not just a sexual thing. It's also like an emotionally involved romantic thing, I guess. Yeah.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
You're not finding out from a text or a phone call like you mean nothing to this person who used to mean everything.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
And also like an intensity level, like living together, like pulling her out, like seeing the change happen, seeing her heal. Like I could I can understand the intensity here is something that like most of us wouldn't experience even in a really strong friendship.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
You know, there's almost like a motherly aspect to I think if it's not romantic, there might be like a motherly aspect or like a familial aspect of like.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
Texted her angrily, okay, bitch, you're always angry. Like, what does that mean to me? I mean, no. No, I'm not the asshole. She's real as hell. Like, I'm like, that's how... Because also, like... Oh, and a titty smacked her. Yeah. Titty whipped her. It was so... Bam, bam, bam.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
aggressive like it was just so mean the way that she spoke like immediately when she was breastfeeding there wasn't even really around me right i'll just take my i'll just also get naked like you don't who are you the pope if you're uncomfortable just turn around i feel like the pope would even be like feed your baby yeah as you should even if like i don't think
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
it's in within her rights to say anything but even if she had to say something like it didn't have to be with that vitriol so there was just no like come on i'll just get naked too and have it all hanging out yeah like god forbid i match your energy now you are not a 15 year old you are an adult woman like i can match your energy you're in my home yeah you're in my home this is my baby
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Also, her choice. She's probably so stressed. Like she's going through like the after effects of pregnancy. She's just been through so much. Like, what does she need? Someone else coming into her home and then giving her crap for the way that she's taking care of her kid. Like with such negativity and such a rude way of saying it.
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212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
Yeah. And it's such a sensitive time for the wife. Yeah, if there's any time to just take your wife's side and like...
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212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
stand 10 toes down with her it's during a pregnancy right after a pregnancy during the marriage like like these are the times that you really need to be on her side be her teammate be her representative especially with people that are closer to you than they are to her like again you should be the one defending her you should be the one stepping in it shouldn't be on her to even react
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
And speaking to somebody that rudely is so much more disrespectful than just like flashing her. Come on. Disgusting.
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212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
My mom visited the other day and I jokingly said that to her and it felt so fucking good. Like she asked about something and I was like, well, as long as you're in this house, you're going to be following my rule. And it felt awesome.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
And if you have uncomfortable feelings about someone breastfeeding in their own home, it's not necessarily so wrong that you might be a little bit uncomfortable, but it is on you to then work through those uncomfortable feelings. It is not on the mother and the person breastfeeding to help you get over those uncomfortable feelings.
Two Hot Takes
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You've got to work through that yourself and not put it on everybody else.
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212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
Maybe they have some other oats they want to sow. There's never a zero percent chance. It's never zero, but... I could I I think after coming out of a relationship where I was cheated on, I was hyper monogamous. And then I was like, well, maybe if I I don't know, this is so like it's so potentially not true because I haven't had actual feelings for someone in so long.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
That was crazy. Yeah. I keep going back to that one story. That was so insane.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
Fine. Next. There's no way. This might be my favorite theme. That you've ever done. Goosebumps.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
Maybe if you feel completely safe in a relationship with someone and like you've been with them for a long time and you trust that they wouldn't cheat on you.
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212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
unknowingly I guess is the phrase but then you are more comfortable maybe to open things up if that's how it is I know but I don't know I'm like I'm single as hell so I mean I think you do get to a point where like at least some couples where it's like oh let's explore things together or apart um
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
Oh, my God. That's not I've had that happen to me before. That's not snooping.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
Well, like, yes, you have to click the link. But as soon as you see it, like then you have to know. I would have people who are saying they wouldn't click it. Like what goes on? I can't imagine living like that. I cannot imagine seeing like a link about somebody maybe cheating that I know and being like, wow, none of my business. I am not looking at that.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
This is such a good topic. I'm so obsessed with this.
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
Also, isn't it a work computer and it's emails? Like, I wouldn't even expect something to be on there. Keep it on your personal cell phone, ma'am. Yeah, maybe if you opened up iMessage, that would be kind of, and, like, started scrolling through, that would be snooping and weird. But, like...
Two Hot Takes
212: Gab, Gossip, & Goosebumps..
Oh, my God. He, like, bypassed even going to the mom. I got the chills. We're moving fast. I did, too. I actually got chills as well. Literally, look at my little goose hairs. I can't believe.
Two Hot Takes
215: Justifiable Crash Out?!
I also wouldn't want someone to come up and do that to my back, but the tummy is even weirder. I know. No, people need to understand boundaries a little bit better out there. I think so. And also this happens in a lot of your stories of like people thinking they can do things that are inappropriate because it's a joke.
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I have to say, like, when I first heard boyfriend test, I thought it was going to be would you still love me if I was a worm type things. Oh, my God.
Two Hot Takes
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So I was like, oh, this is going to be kind of funny. But obviously these are, like, way crazy. I think, like, I don't know. I can understand that.
Two Hot Takes
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some kinds of tests like a little bit i guess but in these scenarios it doesn't make sense because like you're very early on in the relationship you haven't learned each other yet like he doesn't know that that's what you need you should just tell him what you need instead of testing him on it and then in like the pregnancy thing is crazy to do to somebody like lying to someone about being pregnant is like it can't be good for people to experience like that much stress and i don't know i just think it's not appropriate
Two Hot Takes
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That's crazy because also now you're living in wonder about if things are real or not, like the boy who called wolf type thing.
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And you don't know, like, now he's not going to react as well to actual situations because it's going to feel like a fire drill in the back of his mind.
Two Hot Takes
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You got me again. You could say, how would you react if I were to be pregnant right now? You could say that. You could you could just ask that question instead of pretending for a full day.
Two Hot Takes
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Yeah, I hate to, like, diagnose people when I have absolutely no idea. But it almost feels like when I... Get out of the car. I have to click like the lock button 40 times. Otherwise, I don't fully believe that I've actually locked the car. And it seems like this kind of compulsion to like make sure things are OK with like all of these things that you don't actually need to do.
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I don't know if she thinks that she might. think that this is a healthy thing to do, which is obviously very misguided and wrong, but you might be like, oh, it's so smart to early on test somebody. That way you're not getting caught up in a relationship with someone who sucks and then it blindsides you later on. But it's like, even if that's the case, you could come up with a much less...
Two Hot Takes
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more invasive and life-altering test than that like yeah you could call them and say hey my tire's flat can you come pick me up and see i don't know and then be like just kidding it's not but like thank you for doing i don't know even that i'm like you take a deep breath yeah it's still not great you can tell if someone likes you or not right if they want to they will you'll see the signs you don't have to test people
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Yeah, I think it needs to be a serious conversation of like, listen, if there is something that has happened between us where now you feel like you need to be testing me, let's have a conversation about that. But I can't continue this relationship if this is going to continue to be an element of it. I'm going to be on edge all the time. I'm not going to fully believe the things you tell me.
Two Hot Takes
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It's not going to be healthy for like when actual serious issues do happen.
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If you want to have a conversation about how I'd react in a situation, I promise, like, I'll just tell you. You don't have to make the situation fake happen.
Two Hot Takes
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It sounds like he knew the pregnancy thing was a lie the whole time.
Two Hot Takes
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Because he wasn't like, I got so stressed and I was like so scared and then it turned out to be a test.
Two Hot Takes
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Yeah. I mean, I would break up with the person for this. But I don't know, like, at what point in his life, what kind of standards he has right now. Like, I don't know. Maybe this is... This isn't that bad to him. And if he has a conversation with her and it goes well, like, they love each other enough to move on. But I would be like, oh, you're crazy.
Two Hot Takes
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Um, not in like a crazy person type of way, but just in like a bad partner type of way. Like I think I've told like I had an ex of four years, we moved states together, and he cheated on me, which led to a lot of hijinks and silly behavior of like, I saw Tinder 12% phone battery usage this week. And he's like, Oh my god, it's a glitch. And I believed him. I was like, Okay, it's a glitch.
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Like, what can he do? It's a glitch. He said it's a glitch. Like, You know when someone just, like, won't back down from a lie and you just have to accept it?
Two Hot Takes
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Yeah. It's also it's hard to pick up on. It's really hard to pick up on that kind of thing.
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Like, have you had any crazy like past partners try to test you or do any crazy things like that?
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You can't help it. I got crazy. Like, honestly, I think I was crazier in the relationship because I was doing what I could to prevent these things from happening. I know. And he was just cheating. So that's like less crazy. Yeah.
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And she's going to be gone for a while, so. I'm going to Ireland. Ireland. Also, can I tell you, it's so funny. I'm trying to get some free influencer, like, collaborations. And I'm sending messages to, like, iron forges. Let's go. Being like, do you, hey, do you work with?
Two Hot Takes
215: Justifiable Crash Out?!
Yeah. Yeah, that's true. If this isn't a person who's just like, oh, I want to make sure that this is a good guy, then it's probably that mindset of like, I always need people to prove to me that they care about me. So I'm going to do something that pushes them a little bit.
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Now I'll have proof that they love me or I'll have proof that they'll fight for me, even if things aren't great, which is like can be very toxic for the person on the other side of that.
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To constantly be faced with like. Now this is another issue and she's created a problem and now I have to prove myself again.
Two Hot Takes
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You know the little lumberjack guy? I honestly feel like lumberjack is too slutty.
Two Hot Takes
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Well, it just says, Kumbaya has become a term of derision having been associated with what are considered naive and unrealistic attitudes of peace, harmony, and cooperation. But that doesn't sound like it's necessarily, like, problematic.
Two Hot Takes
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I was wondering that for a second. I was like, this does remind me I see some tests sometimes on TikTok happening, but it's like.
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it's a test but then it's also some kind of trend so it'll be like called the boyfriend test but it's a trend so it's like you're not actually doing it to prove anything but it's sort of like a the new prank video basically which i don't like prank videos in general no it's so weird to me especially when like the boyfriend will call their girlfriend or fiance's friend and be like hey is rose with you and the friend is like yeah yeah she's she's uh in the bathroom oh yeah it's like oh
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The one I do like is when they call and they say, hey, like, I put diesel in the car or something like that.
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people be mad at me for saying that no because i get it like he he knows what he's doing like shirt off come on oh not like a specific person not a specific person but just like lumberjack as a career i'm like okay you know what you're doing what about a lumber jill oh absolutely yeah 1000 i don't care you know what i was going to try to film a thirst trap for lesbians of me sanding my deck so that's kind of similar to a lumberjack because it's working with wood
Two Hot Takes
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I think that this was a combination of both your faults because she probably should have been like, by the way, like that's diesel.
Two Hot Takes
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That's probably what we got to do. And she needs to talk to someone. I think so.
Two Hot Takes
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But yeah. No, what? Go ahead. I was just gonna say, I wonder if like her friends are encouraging this and being like, yeah, this is such a good idea. You'll figure out who he is now. Probably, maybe. It's just so misguided.
Two Hot Takes
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What? Just like me, like standing a deck. But I think that like on your hands and knees or with a power tool with like a sander with like a power. Yeah. With a power tool. OK. Don't you think that we've gotten your way?
Two Hot Takes
215: Justifiable Crash Out?!
Well, my ability to get things done came came between me and that dream. But of course, like it's still potentially on the horizon.
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Okay, like, I'm an ADHD hyperfixation diva myself, so real recognize real and what's going on here. All of a sudden being obsessed with one thing and making it your whole life. Yeah, me and the cricket. Yeah, exactly. But now, of course, where the problem starts to get really badly is...
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expecting your significant other to have that same kind of care and interest like she wasn't even saying it was a problem with how into it he was she's saying it's a problem that like she has to sit there and act just as excited she has to get involved in like
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sexual role play that she doesn't want to do like that that's not okay she shouldn't have to be pressured into doing anything sexually that she's not comfortable with and then yeah just like getting mad at her for her not having the same excitement level about like it's wrestling of course she's not gonna have the same excitement level as you
Two Hot Takes
215: Justifiable Crash Out?!
If I was showing someone Game of Thrones for the first time and they were like, oh, this sucks. You know, I'd probably be like, well, that is disappointing to hear. I'm disappointed to hear that something's wrong with you. And then we'd probably never talk about it again.
Two Hot Takes
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Well, and what do you have in common anymore? If that's someone's entire personality, I'd be like, oh, we don't have anything to talk about. We don't have any shared interests now because you have decided that you have only one interest.
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But I'm wondering, surely that had to come up a bit in the conversation where he's like, you don't get excited when we watch wrestling together?
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It's like a little vinyl cutter. It cuts like different shapes into card invitations, if anyone's never heard of cricket. But I think you're doing a really good job.
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Okay, wow. I mean, if she is considering a divorce because of his obsession with wrestling... It has clearly been like at a level that.
Two Hot Takes
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I mean, it's hard to think that someone might be just considering divorce after like a couple of months and they haven't even tried talking about it.
Two Hot Takes
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If you had like an incredible marriage before this, though, I do feel that in the back of my head, I'd be like, this will not last.
Two Hot Takes
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I mean, I definitely think if that conversation hasn't been had, then absolutely have it before divorcing somebody. But I will say if I was like...
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sexually intimate with somebody and they were pressuring me to do something that i'd repeatedly said like i am not interested in this even if they could just tell that i wasn't interested in it i would want them to not want to do that too so like there are elements to this story where i'm like i just i also really don't like that you know no it's really odd but and i'm like i hope you've said like you're uncomfortable and like he starts getting the message yeah
Two Hot Takes
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In the dream world, like this is just a fleeting hyper fixation and he gets over it and he can still watch wrestling. Like you can still watch and enjoy wrestling. The issue is just like forcing her to have the same enthusiasm about something that she's just not enthusiastic about. And also maybe you're giving her the ick a little bit if you're doing all of this like
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role-playing thing and taking it so seriously i'd be like oh it's a huge heck like i met you when i was 22 i didn't realize it was gonna be like this yeah however old she was i don't know false advertising top comment on this one
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Yeah, because it's fine to be really into something. You're allowed to have something that you're very excited about and you watch it on TV and then you go and talk about it online, too. And you talk about it with your friends like that is a part of life. But everything has to be in balance.
Two Hot Takes
215: Justifiable Crash Out?!
Yeah, a little bit of wrestling jargon that we don't know.
Two Hot Takes
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I mean, yeah, find some friends, like chill out a little bit, get to a middle point where, you know, you can be doing other stuff. It's just like having work all the time and also having all the free time in the world. Both aren't good for you. Like doing one thing too much is never good for you. Doing something a little bit. Yeah. What the hell? I know. Do it.
Two Hot Takes
215: Justifiable Crash Out?!
Right. And how much would it cost to get that done if you didn't have a Cricut? Thousands. It's a headache, but it does make beautiful cards without having to spend that much money.
Two Hot Takes
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I mean, like, he loves that woman. Let's start there. He loves her. He's crashing out. This has to be one of the funniest stories I've ever heard. Don't take his titty lattes. Like, to the woman who wrote this, the way that you used words, your linguistic abilities, the different ways that you referred to the titty lattes, like, it all was incredible. And thank you for...
Two Hot Takes
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Thank you for sending that in. A plus plus. Yeah, like you're in the right, of course. Absolutely. You're both the supplier and the provider and the creator of that milk. Like that's your milk. You can do with your milk what you will. Yeah.
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And, like, there was always going to be a cutoff date. This was never going to last forever. I know. I think they're being a little—they're being funny with it. He's like, oh, it tastes like sewage water and broken dreams. Like, he's pouting, but he's not, like, mad mad. He's devastated, I guess, but—
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you know is it a justified crash out for him maybe wait yeah he's the one crashing out he's having a tough go I mean like fine crash out but do it do it in the privacy of your own bedroom like close the door and do it yourself she doesn't need your she doesn't need the guilt from you too no also my good sir cinnamon oat milk
Two Hot Takes
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I've also it's hard to comment on, of course, the taste factor due to the never tasting breast milk element that I'm working with over here. I don't know about you.
Two Hot Takes
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It tasted great. Okay. So then you're saying from the flavor perspective, like he's not making that up. Like it actually is.
Two Hot Takes
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There's a lot going on there. There are parts of this that I just, they're too much for me.
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I mean, like, I'm glad everyone's having fun at the end of the day. I'm just glad we're all having a good time.
Two Hot Takes
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Yeah, no, that's... He's living the dream. He's really, like...
Two Hot Takes
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Oh, people were suggesting alternative milks in the comments. They sure were. That makes sense. I just I think at the end of the day, it's really not about the actual taste for him. I think. It's that it's his wife's milk. And that's about all I got to say on that. I know. Love is beautiful. Love is love. Hey, love is love.
Two Hot Takes
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i'm crashing out poor guy just kidding moving along he is okay he will be okay he is okay even if he never had another titty latte in his life he'll be fine he'll be fine he'll be okay he'll be like 80 years old to be like i remember my wife used to make me those titty lattes they were so tasty those grandkids will like throw up in their mouths
Two Hot Takes
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I'm sorry for exposing you. I just didn't expect the answer to be yes. It's fine.
Two Hot Takes
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This is a tough one, Morgan. This one really encapsulates the question because it's like, is this justified or not? Does this reaction match what was done to her? Because, I mean, terrible things... happen. Sometimes people have to go to a funeral and then immediately after do something else like, you know, that that happens in life all the time.
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Even if like there'll be contestants on American Idol who are like, my father just died, but I'm here performing today, you know, so to B, missing out on your sister's wedding, the most important day of her entire life. You were her maid of honor. That's going to be a whole stress level for her. It's just like, yeah, that sucks to do.
Two Hot Takes
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And she's not saying that that wasn't a terrible day for you or that wasn't a terrible time for you. And she's so sorry that that happened for you. But it's like you've got to show up for people to the best of your ability, in my opinion.
Two Hot Takes
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Yeah. Yeah. You're asking me to show up for you in the biggest way when you didn't do that for me.
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It is. That's why this one's such a hard question because it's like, What happened sucks and this reaction now like is also going to suck for the sister. Yeah. But there's an element of you made your bed and now you kind of have to lay in it like this is the dynamic you created between us. Yeah. And now that's the dynamic I exist in because you did that and this is all I can offer you.
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Like she's not saying she's not going to be there. She's not saying she's not going to celebrate her. I think she's just saying like you left me high and dry when you had that role and And now you're asking me to do it all for you. And like I just I don't have it in me to do that.
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She's not like I won't come to your wedding. You know I won't be there at all. It's just I'm not going to be your maid of honor and like plan all this and like do all these things that you kind of screwed up for my wedding.
Two Hot Takes
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I feel like... They're going to maybe say, I feel like it's mixed, kind of in the middle, like some people saying she, maybe more people saying she isn't the asshole, but then also there being people that are saying she's the asshole.
Two Hot Takes
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Yeah, it's hard. It's if she were being like, I'm not going to go to your wedding. I think it'd be more clear cut like you're an asshole for that.
Two Hot Takes
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Well, I'm not getting the vibe from her that she just wants to hurt the sister. She's not saying I want her to feel how I felt or she put me in a bad position. So I'm going to put her in a bad position. She's giving her ample time. She's telling her right off the bat. I don't think I can do that. They haven't been as close lately. Yes, again.
Two Hot Takes
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if everybody in the world could be a perfect person and not have any pettiness or any spite or any grudges about situations then the obviously the perfect way to react would just be to be gracious and accept and do the job even though it wasn't done for you yeah but i think that kind of ignores some human nature and like just how people are and how we feel about things and like
Two Hot Takes
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how being hurt can affect us and not a lot of time has passed like maybe if maybe if five years had passed it'd be like okay like that sucked but it's she's made up for it yeah over the years we're we're good again no call me petty call me bitter call me spiteful yeah i wouldn't do it
Two Hot Takes
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Yeah, this isn't like an eye for an eye behavior. It's not putting her in any kind of dire situation.
Two Hot Takes
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Well, I agree with that, but I don't know in specifically how it relates to this story, if I will.
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Yeah, I mean, I understand what they're coming from, like the heart of what they're coming from of we do owe people things. I agree with. I don't think that that's what's going on here, though. I think... She's saying like, I, I'm not up to it. And I think that that's okay.
Two Hot Takes
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Two day notice for a wedding is, I'm sorry, that throws so many things into confusion and stress and anxiety. Two days notice is like not notice.
Two Hot Takes
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And also she was still trying to convince her to come like to the day of or to the day before.
Two Hot Takes
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We could both be. But I think it's one of those stories where it is in the middle. And I think that that can be harder. And I understand if people fall on the other side of it.
Two Hot Takes
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Yeah, I'm on her side. I'm just on her side. Yes, it's not the perfect way to react, but... Like, especially with that information of which is what it seemed like, because in her initial post, she wasn't saying like, she's apologized repeatedly, but I haven't been able to move past it. You know, it's okay now.
Two Hot Takes
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To say that they're not at that place right now where it makes sense to be in that kind of role. I don't know if there had been serious apologies from the sister. I think this would be a very different situation. And I think she would have stepped up. And I think it's just all of these little things about how it happened and like.
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even just the importance of her day kind of feeling diminished and unacknowledged. And like, even in the midst, the aftermath of the main parts of the grief still not coming back and acknowledging how important that day was and how like, not just sorry she couldn't be there, but like sad she is that she couldn't be there. And like how much she felt like she missed out and not being there.
Two Hot Takes
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Like I would want to hear, um, I would have loved to be a part of that day with you, and I'm so sad I wasn't there.
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The day will always not be remembered the same in her mind because of that.
Two Hot Takes
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Yeah, personally, I still would not miss even a friend's wedding if a pet died. I'm with you. I know that people are different and everyone's different. Their emotions are different. I think that that's also making it harder for me, though, that I'm just like, I know that I would. Be there no matter what.
Two Hot Takes
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If you want to yell at me, that's okay. Like, I need that sometimes, so... No, I...
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I also feel like this story isn't as much about the tit for tat of it all as it is like, you almost killed my dog. I'm still very mad at you and wouldn't do anything for you right now type vibe. Insane behavior. Two days locked up.
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in a closet what was it laundry room laundry room laundry room no food no water like what why does she have so much resentment toward this dog like at the very least like you should be letting him out and feeding him and like whatever just having him in a different part of the house
Two Hot Takes
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didn't even crash out. She didn't even crash out. She made like one remark that wasn't favorable. Is it a crash? I mean, like she deserved more, actually.
Two Hot Takes
215: Justifiable Crash Out?!
That's just like you. When you locked that dog in that room, you were saying it's OK if I'm killing it right now. Like that is a choice you made. And luckily that didn't happen. But the dog is traumatized. Like, that's just it is animal abuse.
Two Hot Takes
215: Justifiable Crash Out?!
Yeah, because one, I don't already like the element of touching somebody without permission even if it was like somewhere else on the body you know but then also to then comment on her body while doing it and to talk about pregnancy which like you don't know people's relationships with
Two Hot Takes
215: Justifiable Crash Out?!
Very plainly animal abuse, like not even a question of if it is or if it isn't. So, yeah, it makes sense that this woman wouldn't want to do anything for her sister for the next however many months it is, let alone like watch the baby. And now there's going to be some kind of weird thing about her dog again. Also, to not put any food or water in there is so insane.
Two Hot Takes
215: Justifiable Crash Out?!
One of the ex I was talking about earlier was supposed to watch our dog while we were on a trip. And he was like, I'll come twice a day to like play with them and like let them out and feed them again. And like when we got home, the room was covered in shit because he didn't actually come and do it. And he said that he was.
Two Hot Takes
215: Justifiable Crash Out?!
Yeah. And then my parents checked the camera and they were like, he didn't even come. I think he came like a couple times, like enough for them to be alive. But like, yeah. But like not as much as he should have. Evil man.
Two Hot Takes
215: Justifiable Crash Out?!
How do you even like talking? I don't know. I'll figure it out.
Two Hot Takes
215: Justifiable Crash Out?!
having children you don't know if they're having fertility issues they don't know if they have a history of xyz so i think like it's just one of those things that you already shouldn't make comments on body wise and then for all the other issues too no this is so justifiable for me baby crash out could have crashed out harder i
Two Hot Takes
215: Justifiable Crash Out?!
Basically, you missed if Peter Piper picked a peck of pickled peppers, then how much did Peter Piper pick? How much wood could a woodchuck chuck? Whoa. Good job, Morgan.
Two Hot Takes
215: Justifiable Crash Out?!
And she said that this person has made other pregnancy comments to her? In the past. What? Like, what is your deal? I would also make it even more justifiable because it's about time you snap on this pregnancy thing and be like, you know what? Like, I don't want that. That's not what I want. I'm not pregnant, nor do I try to be. Let's give it up. Let's stop it.
Two Hot Takes
215: Justifiable Crash Out?!
Well, where do people get the audacity to just rub someone else's belly or just to, like, touch someone like that in general without consent? Like, I can't imagine just being like, oh, yeah, everyone's fine with me just rubbing on them.
Two Hot Takes
215: Justifiable Crash Out?!
I don't even think you went into that like knowing that saying before today. So I think it's incredible what you've done in just a few moments.
Two Hot Takes
215: Justifiable Crash Out?!
I know. If there are any people who work for HR out there and want to give their insight on how this would go down at your office, I'd love to know.
Two Hot Takes
215: Justifiable Crash Out?!
I feel like pregnancy comments has to be a more common issue.
Two Hot Takes
215: Justifiable Crash Out?!
Like, yeah, well, that's another element. I wonder if a lot of pregnant people are frustrated by the fact that people take it as an OK to rub their belly. Like it's a go go for it type thing just to be pregnant. Now people can rub your belly whenever they want.
Two Hot Takes
215: Justifiable Crash Out?!
I also feel that sometimes the more you try to say you don't want to do something, people can become fixated on it, especially with something like pregnancy or getting married or dating or whatever. It's like, oh, that's the girl who doesn't want to get pregnant. Like, I'm going to make a comment today about how she should get pregnant and poke at that one thing.
Two Hot Takes
215: Justifiable Crash Out?!
Or like try to convince her. I can see that. Because she thinks that this younger girl is wrong. She's like, oh, she doesn't know. She hasn't lived enough life yet. She's going to change her mind. So I'm just going to keep bringing it up to her.
Two Hot Takes
215: Justifiable Crash Out?!
Yeah, that's probably what it is. The only other I was like, maybe she's just so, so beautiful. And this co-worker is like, she has got to have a baby.
Two Hot Takes
206: Chaos as Usual..
I hope so. I hope. You've never done sound effects, have you? No. Interesting. I could see it. I could see it. I'd love to play an animated animal. Or at a live show. I could see you like having control of like a sound effect thing and really going crazy with it.
Two Hot Takes
206: Chaos as Usual..
That's the only change. Booze. You do this whole rebranding thing and it's just you added a sound track.
Two Hot Takes
206: Chaos as Usual..
Yeah. What year was that? At least four years. It's crazy. I think it was like right after COVID lockdown ended. Yeah. Yeah.
Two Hot Takes
206: Chaos as Usual..
wild time flies yeah time flies you were living in a very different area of la at that time i know we've come so far yeah you have a podcast with your friend ellie i do plug it plug it so people after they hear your takes they can so nice they can know where to find you it's called late night drive with ellie and michaela and it's on the places but of course we prefer spotify hey
Two Hot Takes
206: Chaos as Usual..
I'm excited to hear them because you've had that like sinister giggle about at least one of them where I like know that, you know, it's good. Yeah. So I'm excited about it. I...
Two Hot Takes
206: Chaos as Usual..
I mean, it is... So it is the cheater who ruined the family and also in a creepy like predatory way like that was the mom. So the mom is a teacher. I'm just gonna make sure I get these facts right because there's so many people involved in their two story layers here. So Valerie's mom was a teacher. And while her mom was a teacher, she had sex with Valerie's boyfriend who was in high school. Yep.
Two Hot Takes
206: Chaos as Usual..
Okay, so she's definitely the biggest asshole out of this whole situation. Absolutely. But I also think airing your friend's really personal drama online is a bad thing to do as well. Yeah. And to give updates and sort of just be in the drama of it, of sharing those personal details. Yeah.
Two Hot Takes
206: Chaos as Usual..
I understand, I guess, if you're not super online, maybe you have a hard time knowing how many people can see things and like how viral things can get. And maybe they've never experienced something going viral, but you're still like airing really, really personal business online. and like engaging it in a way that you didn't need to engage in it.
Two Hot Takes
206: Chaos as Usual..
And if it were me and I had good intentions originally posting, which I wouldn't do that, but like if I started seeing it blow up, that's probably another point where I'd be like, oh, wow, like this has a lot of views on it. Like I should take this down.
Two Hot Takes
206: Chaos as Usual..
Right, right. You've once again now told everybody their business. Well, how does that make any sense? Oh, my God. I mean, the other layer of this story is insane, though. Like, how is Valerie doing?
Two Hot Takes
206: Chaos as Usual..
Yeah. Her relationship with her mother. I don't know how you come back from that.
Two Hot Takes
206: Chaos as Usual..
Right. That's how they could identify that they were the person who made this post because of other posts they'd made. Yep.
Two Hot Takes
206: Chaos as Usual..
A lot of cat advice. That's pretty identifying. Like, I understand why Valerie would be like, okay, it's pretty clear it's you based on all this other stuff.
Two Hot Takes
206: Chaos as Usual..
Wait, okay, so Valerie was still dating this boyfriend and he didn't know that her mom was a teacher who slept with him when he was in high school?
Two Hot Takes
206: Chaos as Usual..
This original story is crazy. Early relationship, I mean. So on another layer is now her relationship with her boyfriend is fucked up. Yeah. No, she's losing everybody.
Two Hot Takes
206: Chaos as Usual..
Yeah, that's still like a large age gap as well. Obviously not nearly as consequential as like the difference between 19 and an adult. Yeah. Which is so insane. And also she's dealing with like, my mother is a predator and I can't look at her the same.
Two Hot Takes
206: Chaos as Usual..
And that age difference is inappropriate as well. So it's, like, double whammy. Inappropriate.
Two Hot Takes
206: Chaos as Usual..
When did the revelation about why he was ignoring her, it was at the update to that post? So the top comment on that post?
Two Hot Takes
206: Chaos as Usual..
Reddit was on it. That's crazy. Because I don't think I would have, I don't know what I would have thought if we'd heard that story first.
Two Hot Takes
206: Chaos as Usual..
I maybe would have thought there was like a weird interaction that took place when I like wasn't looking or something like something weird was said or something like you.
Two Hot Takes
206: Chaos as Usual..
I wonder, is it possible that the top comments like retroactively got more attention now that people were like, wait, they were right?
Two Hot Takes
206: Chaos as Usual..
Yeah. Yeah. Do we know if Derek like threw up because he has like had negative like violated type feelings about this woman the whole time or if it was just the stress of like. No mention.
Two Hot Takes
206: Chaos as Usual..
Which is probably for the best because that wasn't this person's information to share in the first place like.
Two Hot Takes
206: Chaos as Usual..
That's a crazy thing for someone who isn't her to be saying. Honestly, I missed him typing like gossip girl. Honestly, I miss Derek. But he banged my mom.
Two Hot Takes
206: Chaos as Usual..
It's ironic. It's like, come on, this was the original problem. Was you oversharing and now you're doing it again?
Two Hot Takes
206: Chaos as Usual..
Yeah. For people to like care so much about your stories and like what's going on. To be so invested. Yeah. Oh, my God. That's so insane. I'm sure there are other stories that you've read that were instances of people kind of submitting on behalf of someone else. Yeah. And like doing something similar to that.
Two Hot Takes
206: Chaos as Usual..
Yeah. Yeah, but like people who've gotten away with it maybe. But I wonder how often the actual person finds out because like there's like your podcast or there's like things that go viral on Facebook. Like they reach like different corners. Like there are Instagram accounts that post this story. It's like it reaches all these corners of the internet.
Two Hot Takes
206: Chaos as Usual..
And I for everything that Valerie was going through, like with her parents, marriage, with her relationship, with her boyfriend, with her relationship, with her mother to then be like, and now my friend is also like sharing these private details online.
Two Hot Takes
206: Chaos as Usual..
Yeah. It's embarrassing. That's so embarrassing. You don't want people knowing that. No. It's so personal.
Two Hot Takes
206: Chaos as Usual..
And why does that mean more to you? Like, why do all of these people asking you about a story that's not even yours mean more to you than an actual friend in your real life? I know. Who was leaning on you in this moment. I think that just... In the worst moment of her life.
Two Hot Takes
206: Chaos as Usual..
Could have still, like... Would have still probably brought it up to him and been like, how do you feel about this whole situation? Because the mom couldn't have been like, don't bring it up to your father, though. It would have come up at some point.
Two Hot Takes
206: Chaos as Usual..
Like, it could have so easily came out regardless, but... I also doubt it was a one-off with the mom sleeping with one student. Like, come on. Gross.
Two Hot Takes
206: Chaos as Usual..
Could easily pull out a calculator, but you guys know that there's the gist.
Two Hot Takes
206: Chaos as Usual..
Even college students look very young to me. Isn't that crazy? When I see videos of frat parties now or sorority recruitment and stuff like that, those are babies. I wouldn't date a 22-year-old. I was on a dating app. I started at, like, 23, and I was like, ooh, that's even cutting it. Like, I mean, I'm 28. That's cutting it close.
Two Hot Takes
206: Chaos as Usual..
Yeah, I was like, when I see... Yeah, I haven't dated anyone that much younger than me. Only dated people who are older than me.
Two Hot Takes
206: Chaos as Usual..
I will not sleep with my students. And, like, to be even turned on in that environment is just, like, you have something morally bankrupt inside of you. It's just predatory. You're in a high school environment. Not okay. Like, why is that kid who, like... Their parents are, like, trusting you. Those children are trusting you. Like, you're in this position. Everyone. I don't know.
Two Hot Takes
206: Chaos as Usual..
I mean, I'm glad that she was found out. But it wasn't because of this guy's post that she was found out.
Two Hot Takes
206: Chaos as Usual..
It's tough. Bad news. Bears. If someone went on Reddit about like an innocuous story that was someone else's asking for advice on behalf of their friend, do you think it could ever be okay? Or no, because then you would have the friend's permission if it's okay, you know? Even if it's like not as intimate as this story. Yeah. Yeah.
Two Hot Takes
206: Chaos as Usual..
Like otherwise you would just talk to your friend about it and be like, I'm going to make a post on Reddit and I'm going to ask their opinions. And then they would either say that's okay or that's not okay. And a lot of people do that.
Two Hot Takes
206: Chaos as Usual..
Yeah, absolutely. You're the asshole, OP. Yeah, and just because another asshole exists in this scenario doesn't mean you're free of becoming an asshole too. Crazy. God. So crazy. Wow, that was a good one, Morgan. I hope so. Yeah, that was a good one.
Two Hot Takes
206: Chaos as Usual..
Why is everyone, like, dehumanizing her? They're treating her like an object, like just a vessel for, like, giving birth to things. An incubator a little bit? Yeah. I know. Which, like, is already can be an issue with surrogacy. But, like, in this instance, it's really an issue. Like, I... Why are the parents saying that too?
Two Hot Takes
206: Chaos as Usual..
And then they're also acting like the only reason she doesn't want to do it is like a vain reason. When it's like, no, actually, it's a thing I have to do to my, like I had surgeries. Like it's not just about my looks. Even if it was, it wouldn't matter. Like it's still my choice. It's my body.
Two Hot Takes
206: Chaos as Usual..
you know an authority on the subject you still can't base other people's actions off of what you would do for them and i feel like that can be the cause of a lot of conflicts of like oh well if i were in this situation i would act this way so if they don't do it that means they're like not as good of a person as i am or they don't care about me as much as i care about them that's just not how humans work like you can't just assume that the same things that you would do is what everyone else would do otherwise they're not as good of a person as you
Two Hot Takes
206: Chaos as Usual..
Yeah, I mean, it's tough because surrogacy can be a beautiful thing, but sometimes I see, like, the way the Kardashians are using it, and I'm like, that seems... It can be really...
Two Hot Takes
206: Chaos as Usual..
I'm just shocked that like nobody was on her side. Like even her husband was kind of like unsupportive about it.
Two Hot Takes
206: Chaos as Usual..
yeah what's no we're fine yeah if they simply asked if they simply asked it it's fine to you know be like think about it or whatever not not the husband but like yeah it's it's just the way they went about it is the worst possible way of going about it like assuming she would do it yeah
Two Hot Takes
206: Chaos as Usual..
I would assume so, but... And then if she says no, you'd say, well, why do you care so much about how you look? You're so vain. You're 60 years.
Two Hot Takes
206: Chaos as Usual..
No all kinds of things, yeah. It's very limiting for people. And to not even, yeah, not even to ask, just assume. That's, yeah.
Two Hot Takes
206: Chaos as Usual..
Okay, so... Because it's different because it doesn't need to be your own eggs. So, like, I guess you could be a surrogate for longer than you could give birth to your own child? That's what I'm gathering here. Wow, I had no idea. I'm learning a lot from this story.
Two Hot Takes
206: Chaos as Usual..
They might just have to briefly move somewhere that's surrogacy. It sounds like everywhere else in the United States it's legal. In, like, a lot of other places in Europe it's probably legal as well. Yeah.
Two Hot Takes
206: Chaos as Usual..
Wow. What a crazy story. Yeah. I don't think I would be a surrogate for anybody, even if I like loved them a lot. I love people a lot, but I don't want to do that. And I think that that's a fair choice to be able to make for yourself. So fair.
Two Hot Takes
206: Chaos as Usual..
Yeah. Maybe there's something there. You're going to come up with something amazing.
Two Hot Takes
206: Chaos as Usual..
And all of you know that because you're seeing it right now in front of your faces. It's going to be good. But where can people find you? I'm Mikayla, Mikayla Oakland on Instagram. And I have a podcast called Late Night Drive.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
My mom refused both options as I will ruin the trip if I don't stay under the same roof. If I get my own place to stay, it will solely be to sleep. I plan to be with my family at all other times and events. I don't care about the price of only getting an Airbnb just to sleep. I want my privacy.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
Haven't mentioned it to my cousins or anyone else yet that I'm considering getting my own place as close as possible, though. Am I the asshole? Easy no again.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
I'm no angel. I'll tell you that right now. I'm no saint. I know it. I know I have downfalls. I can be flaky. But... I care too much.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
Nein. Ja. Es scheint sinnvoll zu sein.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
Why are you not getting a little blow-up bed to put in their parents' room? Yeah.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
Why will they be there? Chris is on that. Fuck them, kids. I just don't get that. My first thought was like, they're both under 10.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
Outside, on the beach. Kids fall asleep everywhere. I feel like I've seen some crazy videos of this kid falling asleep upright and she's like, I want a Popsicle.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
Yeah. And I get like, okay, that aunt got the Airbnb and got a good deal. So it's like, oh, well, my grandbabies should have a room. But it's like, they're 10. They might find it fun to sleep in the living room and like make a fort.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
To put two adult, like a couple.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
I mean, I'm sure there's a spot for a blow-up mattress somewhere for these two. That's more private.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
Ein Kühlschrank, aber trotzdem.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
Ich finde, du solltest immer die Jugendlichen schlafen.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
Ich weiß nicht, warum. Du hast das Bett gewonnen.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
Sie sind flexibler. Habt ihr jemals seltsame Airbnb-Trips mit Freunden gehabt, wo du den kurzen Stick bekommst und du bist in einem Raum, der keine Blackout-Kartons hat?
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
Hey, Michaela ist meine kleine Hype-Girl gerade.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
The sun comes up at like 5am, 6am. Right. And I ignore her.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
Wenn ich von Hause arbeite, wache ich einfach auf.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
Ich bin meistens auf und aus dem Bett um 7.30 Uhr. Pretty routinely. I need to be woken up by an alarm.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
Ich kann auch nicht perfekt sein. Wir sprechen über kriminelle Aktivitäten. Ich will sagen, ich will nicht verrückt reden. Ich will keine Worms öffnen. Aber einige der Influencer, die Fan-Favoriten sind, sind wirklich nicht. Sie haben dunkle Spirite. Wenn Leute das nicht wissen... Einen Tag, wenn ich die Accounts verlose... Du wirst einen Teller machen.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
Das ist verrückt für mich.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
Das ist der Grund, warum ich am Abend arbeite.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
Aber wie kommst du auf die Sonne? Ich weiß es nicht. Ich bin überrascht, wenn die Sonne mich auflöst. Ich liebe es, bei einem friedlichen Alarmklopfen aufgewacht zu sein.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
Ja, wie kann das sein? Nein. My phone has the sleep thing and it slowly gets louder. So it's like this little twinkle.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
I'm terrible. If a person wakes me up, I get mean. I get crabby.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
This is why you need to use alarm clocks, people. It's safer. Moving past this, I feel like I need to put a poll, though, to the people to be like, do you guys sleep with blackout curtains? And would you rather have an alarm clock? I don't know.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
Yeah, you're gonna wake up that time anyway.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
It's very confusing to your body. The sun comes up so early and goes right in my window.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
Oh! Oh! It seems your aunt's whole family gets the main rooms. Maybe suggest to your mom that she might like to Airbnb with you and your boyfriend, where if they need quiet time, they have a place to do so. Mom is probably saying the trip would be ruined because she would be the only one from her part of the family if you do not stay there.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
L.O.L. Per Person pays. I will be paying the same as the adults. I don't mind still paying to keep the peace, even if I get my own place to sleep somewhere else. My mom's always been like that. Wonderful woman, but perfectionist, I guess. She always says how the family has to stick together and bullshit. I don't know. I'm close with her, but it's annoying to hear LOL.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
Well, everyone's paying the same, so it's like, why is anyone else more entitled? Especially being too nice. 24-year-old adult couple.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
Yeah. I would get a little snarky probably. I'd have a hard time with this.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
No update from OP. No update. Couple comments, but I cannot gather an inkling on what they are going to do. So, OP, if you're out there, we would like an update.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
Ich habe das Scheiß zu lange gemacht, um alles zu wissen. Ja, es gibt viel da draußen. Aber das kommt alles so her, als Michaela und ich unseren ersten Freundsreise zusammen gemacht haben. Wir sind nach London gegangen.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
Oh mein Gott. Nimm sie in den Bett. Ja, nimm sie in den Bett.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
I mean, we had a stepmom and a cousin.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
Still fresh for me. Oh, it's... No, I feel like... Go get your own place. Yeah. Go get your own place. You're an adult. You're 24. Especially if you're willing to cover it. Don't let your mom guilt trip you. You got it.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
I think that, I mean that being the mom, but I wonder if this was the aunt being passive aggressive where it's like, we don't want them to have sex. Like we're gonna put them on the couch.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
I could see this being a bit malicious.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
Gehen wir weiter. Oh. This episode is brought to you by State Farm. Just like choosing a verdict on one of the stories we read, you want to make the right choice. Well, State Farm has options to choose from to help you find the coverage that best fits your needs. Talk to a State Farm agent today to learn how you can choose to bundle and save with the personal price plan.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
Like a good neighbor, State Farm is there. Prices are based on rating plans that vary by state. Coverage options are selected by the customer. Availability, amount of discounts and savings and eligibility vary by state.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
Okay. But we had a good trip together, which is not the case for a lot of people. Travel can bring out the terrorists. The terrorists being me. That sounded bad. Travel can be terrible? There is terror in traveling at 9-11.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
Nein, das ist ehrlich gesagt, das wäre eine Freundschaftsende für mich wahrscheinlich, weil es ist so, okay, du hast deinen Freund eingegeben, nicht das, was ich verabschiedet habe. Das war ein zwei Monate langer Freundschaftstrip. Warum hast du ihn eingegeben? Er kann nicht allein sein ohne dich. Er vertraut dir nicht. Ist das eine Kontrolle? Huh, seltsam. Okay, lass uns das später evaluieren.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
Yeah, don't capitalize off ours. Now it's an engagement ceremony. It's like a honeymoon, essentially. This is weird. And it's just like, that's fine, he came, he proposed the first night, which, god, you couldn't have waited until the last night. Right. But okay, here we are. You still should stick to the plan, because otherwise you're leaving me high and dry.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
And I've spent so much money, I've saved for years to be able to do this. And you're completely disregarding me, disrespecting me as a person, as a friend. Done.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
What's the worst thing you've done on a trip?
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
I try to pivot as much as you can.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
Some of the best places to travel to though, they have Christmas markets, there's Christmas things.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
I know, it'd be heartbreaking.
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219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
Here's where I get goofy, like I would almost do it out of spite. I would have the most amazing trip and it's like, don't do it out of spite, because that's not healthy, but like do it for yourself. You can do things out of spite. It will be so magical.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
But this is crazy. Also, what? They just got engaged and she needs a week to think about things? Yeah, wait. That was like, why did you say yes to getting engaged? Are you thinking about your relationship or thinking about things with your friend?
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
I've got GoFundMe. Let's go.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
Michaela, as someone that did a little solo traveling yourself, Michaela went to Portugal by herself.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
It's doable. It depends on where you're going too.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
Literally all the time. All the time. Why? Where did they come from?
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
It's fine. Everything works out. But I'm here. She made it to London and then we made it back stateside. So it's all good. What? Do we get an update on this? Checking. I'm looking into this. Please tell me we got an update. I will riot. I will shut all these cameras off. The show will be done if we don't have an update.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
This is the worst news I've had all day.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
The most awkward is like you nuxed the person across. This was me recently. I nuxed him. I go, I just looked an hour ago and it was open. And we nuxed and then literally someone sat there. That happened.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
I'm so sorry. What a horrific ending.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
Patreon.com slash two hot takes. Thank you so much for including us in your dinner Patreon when Michaela and I were in London. Oh yeah. Olivia, I see you a... Yeah, they invited us to dinner in London. Patreon.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
They had really good bread. They had really good bread.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
Good cups. They gave me a little cup, a tea mug. Love.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
Exactly. Moving along. Let's talk about another proposal real quick, okay? This is also coming from a relationship advice. I'm sure it'll be great. I'm sure nothing bad is going to happen. It's going to be awesome.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
Hey, you had that palate cleanser on your last episode. You know it can be good and wholesome too. That's not the spark behind your eyes right now.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
It is titled, My 32 male girlfriend, 29 female, upset about proposal. Oh boy. Recently got engaged and my girlfriend didn't find it special enough. We went over to Monterey, the first place that we did a road trip together and went on a hike. It was loaded with people because of Memorial Day weekend and my girlfriend actually gets a little nervous around people.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
I brought it upon myself with the nux.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
I originally wanted to go up to Big Sur and go on a trail that overlooks everything, but when I mentioned Big Sur, my girlfriend said that might be a bit far, since we'd like to squeeze in the aquarium. Instead of choosing another trail, I had her choose one with a walking distance that she was comfortable with, and we basically went on a random trail until I found a spot to pop the question.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
I gave a little speech and got on one knee and asked her. And she was extremely happy in the moment and said yes. We walked back and the rest of the trip went normally. When we got back home the next day, she asked, what did you plan? Just to see the details as she was curious and still happy. But to be honest, I didn't really have an answer.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
I booked a restaurant and wanted to take her to Big Sur. But what actually happened was, we just went to Monterey and chose a random trail. No flowers, no poster, nothing but the ring. To her, it didn't feel special. She had booked the Airbnb and randomly chose a trail and it basically felt like every other trip we go on.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
To me, my only requirement was basically that we go to Monterey, the first place we traveled to, and propose at a hike, which was what we did on our first date together. She spent the whole next day crying and said it was her one and only time to be proposed to and it just wasn't special. It's not like she wanted people there or anything, but just wished that I had planned more.
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219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
In hindsight, I should have chosen the Airbnb and have been more adamant on going where I wanted to go, but I wanted to prioritize her comfort. Towards the end of the night, she said that she's not sad anymore and it's okay, but I feel terrible. I'm not sure what to do at this point. It just feels like we're not going to be okay and it's going to loom over her. I don't know.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
I'm like torn on this one. I am too. I'm kind of torn because like it sucks that she's having this reaction and like...
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
Und es ist wirklich eine Überraschung. Ich wusste, dass es kommen würde. I wish I didn't. I genuinely wish I was like thrown, but like I'm an inquisitive little bitch. Like I knew it was coming. I'm paranoid and I get reads on vibes quick. I love that it was a surprise. I do think that he could have pushed him and like, no, I really want to go to Big Sur.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
Like it's supposed to be really cool this time of year. Let's go to Big Sur. I do think he could have pushed more, but I've seen it. Ja. Ja. Ja. Und so war es so, dass ihre Freundin immer gesagt hat, du solltest dich umdrehen, du solltest dich umdrehen, du solltest dich umdrehen, du solltest dich umdrehen. Und sie war so, nein, wir gehen auf den Strand.
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219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
Ich trage meine Schmerzen, oder was auch immer es war. Und es war so, dass sie in ihrem eigenen Weg kam. Sie blockierte ihr eigenes Geschenk.
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219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
I know. It's a hard one. Yeah. It's definitely a hard one. And, like, I'd be curious to know what conversations they had about proposals before. Same. I was just thinking that. Like, this is the ring I would like. And, you know, I really envision... Getting engaged on a really fun trip we take, like in Paris or whatever. Or like, oh, this friend's engagement looked so lovely and special.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
Ich weiß. Und das ist das, was ich sage. Ich sage, hat sie ihr eigenes Segen blockiert? Hat dieser Kerl einfach nur A-Wall gemacht und aus dem Skript gegangen? Ich bin interessiert auf mehr Details.
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219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
Ich weiß. Na, er spricht am Ende hier. Ich weiß nicht, was ich tun soll. Has anyone ever done a re-proposal and redone it?
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219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
To cry all day. Ma'am, you got engaged. Be happy. I think there's so many people that don't get the ideal proposal. Because it's not...
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
Genau. Und es ist so... Einer, ich denke, viele von uns, wir kommen in unsere eigenen Hände, wir überdenken es. Wir haben die Vorschläge mehr für Instagram gemacht und weniger für dich als Paar. Es ist viel da. Und ich kann mir selbst schuld sein. Ich habe Justin gesagt, ich wollte einen Fotografen in den Bäumen schieben, weil ich es commemorieren wollte. Aber natürlich.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
That's fine. Travel today, guys. I've got some amazing guest co-hosts down here on the sofa. We've got Chris Clemens joining. If you didn't recognize that beautiful voice. And Michaela Oakland. Hi. I know you guys love that. Not. But very excited. Chris has a new podcast. We talked about it on our episode with him just a few weeks ago. Chris versus the people.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
Aber du hast noch gesagt, was du wolltest. Ich habe gesagt, was ich wollte.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
We're gonna get into the comments. We're gonna see.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
But I do want to say like, I think proposals are one of those things that are really interesting for me. Because it's like, this proposal is about the person that's getting proposed to, right? So it should be what they want. Mhm. But at the same time, it's also what the other person wants and how they want to show the love and the care for that person.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
So I hate to be like, well, the proposal is only about her. She should have gotten what she wanted. It's about them and their love. And this was thoughtful. I wanted to be in Monterey, where we first went on a date, where we first... Doing what we did on our first date.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
Ich weiß, die Leute schreien wahrscheinlich, wenn du hier seit Beginn bist. Es gibt eine Geschichte, die Justin und ich hatten. Und es war so, dass dieses Paar sich engagiert hat. Und es war so, dass sie in ihrem Apartment waren und überall Kugeln gesetzt haben. Und das war ihr Vorschlag. Und ich war so, ein Apartment mit Kugeln? Bin ich jetzt auf der anderen Seite von dem jetzt?
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219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
Ich bin mehr wie in dem unerwarteten romantischen Boot, wo es so ist, was du willst, für jeden ihrer eigenen. Wenn 100 Kugeln in deinem Apartment ist, was du willst, mach es. Unfortunately, this isn't what she wants and I'm scared to get into the comments, but here we go.
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219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
So, top comment. Das ist ein ziemlich großes Problem. Deine Freundin ist nicht traurig über den Vorschlag. Sie ist traurig, dass du sie nicht gut genug kennst, um zu wissen, was sie wollte, auch wenn sie das nicht artikulieren kann. Das ist, was sie expressiert. Dass du sie nicht gut genug kennst, um etwas zu tun, was sie eigentlich mögen würde.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
Oder vielleicht, dass du es wusste und einfach nicht gewählt hast. This is like intense. It takes that...
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
I know. Well, this next comment makes some interesting points that kind of have my wheels turning too. Your original plan sounds nice in theory, but it seems poorly planned. You chose Big Sur on a very busy weekend, knowing your girlfriend gets nervous around people. You mentioned we wanted to squeeze in the aquarium.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
Why did you encourage plans to go to the aquarium when you knew you wanted to propose at a farther trail and had restaurant plans? So like, it does seem like it was kind of like this panic where it's like, I have to do it today. And it's like, you could have maybe reached out to the aquarium and said, I want to propose. Is there like a little private area or close to closing?
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
Can we be the last ones left in front of the fish tank?
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
Es ist wie wenn jemand sagt, ich will keine öffentlichen Vorschläge. Und dann wird er in Times Square versprochen. Ja. Es ist so, dass es in irgendeinem Fall einen Unterschied gibt. Aber das macht ihn nicht ein Arschloch. Und deshalb finde ich, dass es eine schwierige Geschichte ist. Es ist ein Verhältnisvorschlag, also nicht nur fragen.
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219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
Ich würde es ehrlich gesagt wiederholen. Ich würde es wiederholen. Ich denke, es ist total gut, es wiederholen zu lassen.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
Gavel, explosion. And little Chris heads fly out of it.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
And we can all be our own worst enemy sometime. When it comes to a super emotional event... Like a proposal. I cry on all my birthdays. I cry on every birthday. It's insane. I think maybe she's kind of having this come down too. This is my only proposal. I only get this once and it's not exactly what I would have wanted. I don't feel really listened to. So just redo it. Redo it.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
There's only one comment from OP. We have no update. The only comment is in response to this. When you say you found a spot to propose at, do you mean you found a gorgeous view overlooking nature and you were standing there reminiscing about your relationship and then you got down on one knee?
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
Or do you mean you found a level spot in clearing and suddenly got down on one knee in the middle of that? And OP says, top of the hill, looking down at the Monterey Bay, gave a little speech and got on my knee.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
I mean, I'm like trying to find what Monterey could potentially look like. Sure, but they go on hikes all the time. They're always seeing that.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
Michaela, amazing as always. Thank you. I recently discovered the SheRatesDogs Instagram was banned, so if we have anyone out there that can help get that back for Michaela.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
Reach out to the aquarium. People love... Yeah. Six hours old. Six hours old is his last comment. Yeah, it's 11 hours old now. At the time I'm reading it. But I think like... People love being helpful when it comes to helping with love. Justin reached out to the hotel where we got engaged and was like, hey, I want to propose. What about this, this, this?
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219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
The girl there was so helpful for him and arranging it. I think, don't be scared to reach out. Shoot your shot. See if you can get a private thing at the aquarium. See if they'll let you meet a penguin. I don't know, but send the email, make the calls.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
If you're thinking about proposing to someone... You can get flowers. Flowers, I feel like, are the bare minimum, unless she hates flowers.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
And if you're going to propose outside in nature, please make sure they are real flower petals, not some fake-ass silk shit, because that's not biodegradable. Do something. Put a little thought effort into it. If you are going to propose to someone and you have no idea what they would like, you better start being a detective.
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219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
You better send them a fricking quiz from BuzzFeed about best proposal character I want. I don't care what it is, but you better start researching.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
Chris is passionate. Probably some fireworks and a blimp. I'm pissed I didn't get fireworks. I'm kidding.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
I keep joking with people. I'm like, send me up in a hot air balloon. But one of these days someone is going to say bet and put me in a balloon and I'm going to have to admit I don't want it. I'll put you in a balloon. I don't want to be in a balloon. Why do you keep saying it, Queen? Weil es so dramatisch ist. Es ist wie ein... Oh mein Gott, es ist eine Hyperbole.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
Was ist eine Hyperbole für?
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219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
Was ist das große Wort für Exaggeration? Du bist so, Hyperbole. Ja, nein, nein, nein, ja, ja.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
Es passt den Anrufen, die ich habe.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
I'm down to do anything. Put me in a hot air balloon.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
It's an exaggeration. Yeah.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
Bring her back. But on that note, let's get into these terrible travel tribulations. Tales.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
Oh, he's clearly feeling a little slighted, a little, well damn, my ring I got her ain't good enough.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
Are they engaged or married?
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
I know. This is another one I'm torn on.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
I do see it being silly, right? Where it's like, it's a fake ring. I just wanted to have a little fun. It doesn't take away the meaning from my ring you got me. It's like playing dress-up. It's a travel ring. You know, it's whatever. But I could see... If this was like something like that he worked so hard to get her, like he spent so much on this ring and it was everything she wanted.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
And then she just goes ahead and buys this fake ring that's even bigger and more extravagant. Then it would almost maybe feel like what I did wasn't good enough.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
Maybe it'll be in the bloopers someday.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
Ich habe einen Reisenring bekommen. So mine, I went a little smaller than my real one because my real one, like one, I had a friend scare the shit out of me. My friend Richa, I like went out. We did like a girl's brunch somewhere around L.A. like shortly after I got engaged. And she was like, oh, my God, your ring is gorgeous. But like. Du kannst das nicht tragen, wenn du reisen kannst.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
Du kannst das nicht tragen, wenn du an bestimmten Orten gehst. Und ich war so, warum? Und sie war so, mein Freund hat literally nur für ihren Ring gejumpst. Und sie hat mich wirklich gefreut. Und ich habe einen Reisenring bestellt. Und es war ein bisschen kleiner, anders geformt, anders. Justin hat nicht geholfen. Ich glaube nicht, er hätte geholfen, wenn ich einen größeren hatte.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
Aber ich habe etwas anderes gemacht und nicht so flach, weil ich keine Aufmerksamkeit brauche. Wenn ich einen falschen Ring trauere, brauche ich keine Aufmerksamkeit. Ich will mich sicher fühlen. Ich will nicht vermugt oder gesprungen werden, damit jemand meinen Ring nehmen kann. Weil sie werden nicht wissen, ob es wahr oder falsch ist, wenn sie mich auf der Seite aufstehen.
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219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
Sie werden mich punchen und dann später Fragen stellen.
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219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
I can see both sides. It's not that deep. It's dress up. It's her having fun. They both wanted her to get a fake ring.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
But it's... That's not her saying...
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
No, and I'm fully on board with like... I texted my friends who... Did they respond?
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
Okay. I will say, I'm fully in the boat, too, of like...
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
having multiple engagement rings like I joke where I'm like I want to be like Victoria Beckham I want 15 different engagement rings does she have 15 yeah good for her yeah and some of like one of her rings is worth like a million which I'm not in that caliber but like listen I might want she's posh spice for a reason I know but like I think you can do like
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
One, if your main ring was like five grand, that's insane. My main ring did not cost that. I went Moise Knight. I was very reasonable. And I think you can like upgrade over the years or you can do like, hey, push present. Here's another ring. Like I am fully on the board of you can have multiple and have it not take away meaning from the original ring.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
Have you seen the TikTok trend where this person stops girls on the beach and is like, how much does he need to spend on your engagement ring? And some girls are like, three months salary. And so it's like, okay, if I would be pissed, I'm putting myself in this shoe. If I spent, I don't know, 15, 20 grand on a ring for Justin, three months salary, and then he was like, I'm gonna try something new.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
Okay, Freunde, bevor wir in die Geschichten dieser Woche kommen, möchte ich nur sagen, dass dieses Episode von Duluth Trading aus meiner eigenen Heimatstadt präsentiert wird. Hot summer days got you sweating. Do not let your clothes add to the discomfort. Duluth Trading is your go-to for conquering the heat. They've engineered incredible summer tech clothing designed to help you thrive.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
Exactly, and you should be able to have a conversation and be like, hey, it hurts my feelings, it feels like my ring isn't good enough. Not even that.
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219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
Which like, I mean, also kind of like why... I don't know. Like, that is a good question of, like, why do we feel the need for fake rings? Why can you just not wear it? For me, I like having a ring on. I like, literally, in the elevator at one of the places we went to in London, someone was like, are you trying to have a good time tonight? Are you single?
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
And I literally just held up my hand and it was like, okay, done. Thanks. Leave me alone. It is such a nice, like, leave me alone. Like, people wear fake engagement rings all the time.
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219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
What's that big word? Harassed? That's one.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
Bis zum nächsten Mal. A little vintage. Okay, coming from Am I the Asshole. It is titled, Am I the Asshole for abandoning my parents at an island in the Caribbean so I could get back to our cruising time? I graduated from high school back in December. As a gift, my parents got me a cruise. It was also for my 18th birthday. It was also a family vacation.
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219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
Und das ist so, dass sie an der Basis davon kommunizieren müssen. Das kommt aus dem Hinweis der Beziehung. Er muss kommunizieren. Er. Er macht das. So true. Und ich denke, es gibt viele Zeiten in der Leben, wo ich mich weiß, wenn ich überwältigt bin, kann ich ein bisschen knackig und geschlossen werden und nicht reagieren, wie ich es idealerweise mit einer rationalen Meinung möchte.
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219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
But... God, you're so flawed.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
I'm no saint. I'm not a saint.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
But like I think... Honestly, and this is a generalization, but a lot of men are not in touch with their emotions. A lot of men are not taught. It's okay to be in touch and be hurt. So for him, it's like, I can't be hurt. I'm going to be angry and I'm going to ignore her. Isn't that crazy?
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219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
Technically, I just learned this recently, men and women are equally as emotionally intelligent, just in different categories. Okay, but some people train that shit and some people don't think they have to.
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219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
I will say, I don't know if this is on a Patreon episode, but Lauren and I get into it. It might be on a regular, I don't, you guys, I black out all the time on which goes where.
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219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
But I'm like, I think, you know, this is a good lesson to be like, What is the core feeling? Like, we need to give men the feeling wheel. And it's like, you're acting angry, but like, where is this actually coming from? And I know that sounds silly. No, that's what I'm saying.
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219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
That was a recent discovery.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
Well, no, I've known that since starting this podcast. But like apparently wiping your butt doesn't, it means you're not an alpha male. No, it's crazy. Yeah, like this is a whole thing in the alpha male world. Like you cannot wipe your butt.
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219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
I need something with an update. I need something with an update. Maybe on the 365th day they'll give an update.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
Well. You're like, well, here we go. Let me see what I have for you. Any dogs? Okay, let me see what I got. Okay, I think I'm going to give you guys a choice on this last one.
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219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
A choice or a coin flip. You can put it to either. Option number one. Am I the asshole for canceling the entire vacation when I found out that my stepdaughters deliberately hid my daughter's passport to get her to stay home?
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219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
Option two. I'm gonna have an answer. Am I overreacting? Husband says me taking a bath on vacation is unreasonable.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
Or option three. Am I the asshole for leaving my friends stranded during a road trip after they repeatedly disrespected my boundaries?
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
Am I the asshole for canceling the entire vacation when I found out that my stepdaughters deliberately hid my daughter's passport to get her to stay home?
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
I've been married to my wife Beth for five years. I have a bio daughter named Jessica. She's 18. And I also have two stepdaughters named Monica and Leah. They're both 25 and 28. Both are single moms and live with us currently. I've read Cinderella before.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
Jessica didn't have a problem with it at first, since this is what she does to earn money, but since her stepsisters don't pay her much, she would just refuse to babysit. She can't go to the ball.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
We usually stay at all-inclusive resorts, but I have always wanted to go on a cruise. I told my parents it was different and that if we went on excursions, we had to follow the schedule no matter what. Well, it was a week-long cruise and they would not head back to the ship when I said it was time to go. They were busy shopping and bargaining with the locals.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
They said it's because the kids are used to Jessica and hiring another babysitter would cause issues. And also said that Jessica isn't too fond of our destination. But it was obvious that Jessica wanted to go. They insisted and Beth offered to pay her double. And there was just a lot of back and forth on this until I demanded they stop bringing it up.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
We were supposed to go last week, but when everybody had bagged their bags and was time to go, Jessica found out that she didn't have her passport on her. We searched her bag, then went home and searched there. Beth and my stepdaughters kept insisting that we go back to the airport or else we would miss our flight. They insisted that Jessica just stay home with the kids.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
They even told the new babysitter to go home because she was no longer needed. I refused to go and kept searching for the passport until Monica admitted that she helped Leah hide Jessica's passport to get her to stay home with the kids. I was livid. I tried to get her to tell me where it was, but she said that Leah had it.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
Leah denied, so I threatened to cancel the vacation and that's when they gave it back. I decided to actually cancel the vacation and blew up at both of them and berated them. They stayed upstairs for a while and Beth refused to speak to me and said that I punished my stepdaughters for worrying about their kids and wanting them to stay with someone they know.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
I got told I overreacted and ruined the trip for everybody. Am I the asshole?
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
To also this line here, I find this so comical. I punished my stepdaughters for worrying about their kids and wanting them to stay with someone they know. Bitch, they know you. They know their mother.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
Literally. Their moms don't need to go on a vacation if they can't bring the kids or find childcare they're comfortable with. It's giving Casey Anthony. And that's on that. I talk about it on my podcast this week. Clues, baby. We did an episode on her. People need to be tuning in to Clues this week. It's an insane case.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
That is totally... I mean, I guess that's fine.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
Chris fühlt sich schmerzhaft. Stör den Pot.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
No, we're on the same page, baby.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
I finally said that I was heading back to the ship. My mom waved me off. They missed the departure. By a lot. Like 45 minutes. They got a hold of me through WhatsApp. They wanted to know why I didn't get the boat to wait for them. I wanted to scream that they were not going to inconvenience 3998 people because two could not understand what a schedule was.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
That's what I want to know.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
Mean girls. To steal someone's passport and manipulate the situation so she can't come on a trip. Yeah. Yeah.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
Yeah, it's in my pocket, actually. They were creating this situation of chaos to the point where Jessica would be like, okay, well, if the babysitter's leaving and we can't find it, I guess I'll stay home anyways. This is an 18-year-old. And you are going to have her watch two young kids by herself for days on end? That's irresponsible.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
I think you're being bad. Wow.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
Next comment down. There is no way the wife wasn't in on this too. She absolutely knew the plan. OP needs to ditch all three of them. Wait, that's such a gag because it's so true. She knew. It was probably her idea.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
This is one... It blows my mind that some people are willing to put up with partners that hate their kids. Yeah.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
I see this all the time on Father Knows. Like, my dad's show, the amount of write-ins we get from you guys, the listeners, real people, that are like, my dad picked my stepmom over us. He won't come to my graduation. He won't be at my wedding. Like, it's like... For what?
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
Okay, lasst uns in die Accounts gehen und sehen, ob wir ein Update haben. Ich kenne meine Kinder noch nicht.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
Ich habe es uns jetzt gemacht.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
Es gibt kein Update? Es gibt kein Update.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
This is bad. We have two comments from OP.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
Poor guys just out there beating on their drums. Okay, we'll get a new one. So they've got like many families in that house. Right? Because both of the daughters also have families. Yeah.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
They ended up having to fly to the next port from there and it was expensive. They are pissed at me for leaving them behind. I don't know what I was supposed to do. They literally told me that they knew what they were doing. I wish I had never asked for this. They're making me miserable because I left without them.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
They were evil. They were evil. I'll give them that. Like they're rotted. Why can't the other parents watch them for three days? That's a great question. Curious about that. So the other comment we have from OP is in response to this. Not the asshole. You don't just have a stepdaughter problem though. You have a wife problem.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
I would rethink your current family situation and how your daughter is being treated. OP goes, you're right. After seeing where my wife stands in this, I'm beginning to consider some things.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
Wow. Ist edging, like, can you use that in non-sexual ways? Yeah. Is that okay?
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
Well, guess what? Next time.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
I was trying to explain hyperbole. Do you think I've heard of that? So true. But you were right in the end of it all. Thank you.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
Two shots, one bird, double entendre.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
Rock, rock, wie ein Dungeon Dragon.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
Always. Thank you guys so, so, so much for being here with me. Where can everyone find you guys?
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
Das ist so verrückt. Das ist alles, was ich habe. Wenn ihr ein bisschen mehr von Chris für gratis sehen wollt, haben wir eine verrückte Geschichte auf Patreon gemacht. Es ist gratis. Es ist einer der verrückten Reddit-Geschichten. Es ist in der Reddit Hall of Fame. Es ist die Geschichte von Jolly Rancher.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
Don't send me the bill. Other than that, until next time guys. Bye!
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
Also, du hattest günstige Tickets von dem Port, an dem du geblieben bist, nach dem nächsten. Bist du nicht glücklich, dass du nur zwei hattest und dein Kind auf dem Schiff kam? Ja.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
No, you guys, this is really bad, too. I feel like when people fall overboard, they can't even stop it that fast. It just keeps going. I just don't know if they would.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
Oh, the pool, the drinks, the all-inclusive food, the dance competitions, the musical performances.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
See, I want to go on a big cruise where I make new friends every day.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
You'd be really good at that. I want Carnival to sponsor me. Virgin Atlantic, whoever's got a ship, I will go on it. I will record an episode there. Delta does know.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
I wanna go. I wanna be on a boat. I never thought I'd be a cruise girl. I thought it was my literal nightmare. And I've been seen really good promo. Put me on the boat. I'm a boat girl. Not a yacht girl. A boat girl. A cruise girl. Okay, period.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
Es gibt einige Influencer, die... Should not have platforms, we'll put it that way. Mikayla and I met some crazy ones on our trip. Stop, it was so... Wait. I've never been more exhausted after a conversation. Can we talk about it on Patreon?
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
And we wouldn't get left out of port.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
We would be smarter than that. We would shop... and make the boat in time. Not the asshole, right? Yeah. Where are we falling? Oh, not the asshole. Not even a little bit.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
No, didn't even do his thing.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
Top comment. You're the asshole.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
Top comment, not the asshole. They seriously think the ship will delay for 45 minutes? Yeah, no. The docks and ship have a schedule to keep. They are adults and need to be responsible for getting back on time. Which is something you have figured out in less than six months of being an adult. At least you don't have to go on any more vacations with them after this. This, not the asshole.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
I've been on a cruise. They make it crystal clear that the ship waits for no one. Parents fucked around and found out.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
I always loved that picture.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
I'm just kidding. Well, it is fine. You're fine. Sure.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
Just remember the Jolly Rancher story.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
Okay. This next one, it's having quite the moment on Am I the Asshole? It's like one of the top trending stories for the past couple weeks. Have not read it at all. I'm going in blind with you guys. So here we go. Let me just wipe my tears here. It's not like actually her. It looks like her, but it's a random off Etsy.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
No. Just kidding. This next one coming from Am I the Asshole? 16 hours old. It is titled, Am I the Asshole for booking my own Airbnb so I don't have to sleep on a couch for six nights?
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
Ja. Ja. Ja. The last bedroom, you may wonder, is where my aunt made an innocent mistake in miscounting. There are only five bedrooms. They told me that my boyfriend and I will have to sleep on a pull-out couch. I told my parents I would rather not sleep on a couch even if it does pull out. I also don't want to make my boyfriend sleep on the couch with me either. Ja, genau.
Two Hot Takes
219: Trip to the Edge.. Ft. Chris Klemens & Michaela Okland
Same goes for my boyfriend. I don't want to make him do all of that either. My family has never had this big of a vacation all together in such a long time. I would love to be involved and whatnot, but I said I would rather not go if I can't have a room to myself or I'll book my own place nearby and I will pay for my part for the main house everyone else is in regardless.