Darlene
Appearances
The Ramsey Show
Math Is Important but Behavior Change Is What Matters
Well, I have to say yes and no. I know he's not been that great with money, but to this extent, it's new. How I found out, I'll try to keep it short, but you know how you have you connect with your vehicles, and I was pulling up in our driveway from running Aaron, and his phone actually connected.
The Ramsey Show
Math Is Important but Behavior Change Is What Matters
He was on the line with, I guess, some loan agent from his loan company, and I heard something about a forbearance or a deferment. And so I sat in the driveway and tried to listen as long as I could. And then the call disconnected. And then I came in and went downstairs and confronted him. And even though I confronted him on this, he still continued to lie about how far behind he was.
The Ramsey Show
Math Is Important but Behavior Change Is What Matters
We haven't really set a date, to be honest with you. I've been comfortable with just the engagement the way that it is, and I just – I want things to be more stable. All right, so how can we help you?
The Ramsey Show
Math Is Important but Behavior Change Is What Matters
Well, I mean, I obviously don't expect any type of relationship or marriage counseling. I do know I'm good with money. I think everybody can always be better with money. What I want to do is to be able to get him to sit down and to be completely honest about finances in general, no matter how bad it is.
The Ramsey Show
Math Is Important but Behavior Change Is What Matters
We really need to get to the root of the problem and to be able to sit down and look at his finances, my finances. I agree.
The Ramsey Show
Math Is Important but Behavior Change Is What Matters
No. When I confronted him and he knew that I heard the conversation on the phone, I tried to sit and Google in front of him what deferments were and what forbearances were just to educate myself. Because you weren't sure. Yeah, and try to figure out what he was actually doing and what his plan was.
The Ramsey Show
Math Is Important but Behavior Change Is What Matters
And when I started reading off and trying to figure out whether forbearances added on to the back of your loan, to the end of your loan, or if it's a balloon payment, And I looked at him and I said, well, forbearance to say that you have to be four months behind. I said, you just said you were a little bit behind. And what did he say to that? He said, no, I don't want to be that far behind at all.
The Ramsey Show
Math Is Important but Behavior Change Is What Matters
Well, then there was another lie. He was already four months behind.
The Ramsey Show
Math Is Important but Behavior Change Is What Matters
We have a few times, yes. It's been little conversations and when it kind of gets a little bit more heated, we step aside a little bit and take another day and then sit down and look at it again so we both don't get so upset or he doesn't feel attacked or any more ashamed and he says he feels like a failure and...
The Ramsey Show
Math Is Important but Behavior Change Is What Matters
Hi, how are you? I called in on the show just to try to see what kind of help we could get and guidance in regards to my other half has been hiding some things financially, and I'm having difficulties with that and trying to get to communicate with him to resolve so we don't lose our house.
The Ramsey Show
Math Is Important but Behavior Change Is What Matters
Well, he's always not been real good with money, but, I mean, he does try his best. And even though we're just engaged, we don't have our finances together. He pays his things on his own, and I pay things on my own. We've never really sat down and gone over our finances with each other, but it's just he's got himself in a predicament.