Bert Kreischer

never seen that i was like that's me and you we're like like what if that's the way that's the way we're we're the highlanders or the outliers or whatever it's so crazy i've never seen anyone that had them and i'm like god damn it and did she share anything about them or just no it's too loud i wanted to talk to her about them and go like they're just benign they're just bumps do you know dude have you seen these

never seen that i was like that's me and you we're like like what if that's the way that's the way we're we're the highlanders or the outliers or whatever it's so crazy i've never seen anyone that had them and i'm like god damn it and did she share anything about them or just no it's too loud i wanted to talk to her about them and go like they're just benign they're just bumps do you know dude have you seen these

never seen that i was like that's me and you we're like like what if that's the way that's the way we're we're the highlanders or the outliers or whatever it's so crazy i've never seen anyone that had them and i'm like god damn it and did she share anything about them or just no it's too loud i wanted to talk to her about them and go like they're just benign they're just bumps do you know dude have you seen these

Crazy.

Crazy.

Crazy.

Oh, I'm going to fucking, I'm tying one on. Are you? Yeah, I'm done. I had a really great run of not drinking. How long? Eight days. Get on a plane for Hawaii. I have two drinks for takeoff. Fly. Sober. Land. No booze. At the hotel. No cocktail. Sleep. Wake up. Feel amazing. Workout. Amazing. Comedy is... The reason I will be alive is because of comedy.

Oh, I'm going to fucking, I'm tying one on. Are you? Yeah, I'm done. I had a really great run of not drinking. How long? Eight days. Get on a plane for Hawaii. I have two drinks for takeoff. Fly. Sober. Land. No booze. At the hotel. No cocktail. Sleep. Wake up. Feel amazing. Workout. Amazing. Comedy is... The reason I will be alive is because of comedy.

Oh, I'm going to fucking, I'm tying one on. Are you? Yeah, I'm done. I had a really great run of not drinking. How long? Eight days. Get on a plane for Hawaii. I have two drinks for takeoff. Fly. Sober. Land. No booze. At the hotel. No cocktail. Sleep. Wake up. Feel amazing. Workout. Amazing. Comedy is... The reason I will be alive is because of comedy.

Do two shows in Hawaii, two nights in Hawaii. Oh, I didn't know you were doing shows. Yeah, yeah. My stand-up sucks. And it's so bad, I can't even tell you. Everyone in Hawaii, thank you for coming out. I really appreciate it. I'm so sorry. No, stop. I mean, I'm just... I have nothing. I have no tentpole story I'm working on. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I have...

Do two shows in Hawaii, two nights in Hawaii. Oh, I didn't know you were doing shows. Yeah, yeah. My stand-up sucks. And it's so bad, I can't even tell you. Everyone in Hawaii, thank you for coming out. I really appreciate it. I'm so sorry. No, stop. I mean, I'm just... I have nothing. I have no tentpole story I'm working on. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I have...

Do two shows in Hawaii, two nights in Hawaii. Oh, I didn't know you were doing shows. Yeah, yeah. My stand-up sucks. And it's so bad, I can't even tell you. Everyone in Hawaii, thank you for coming out. I really appreciate it. I'm so sorry. No, stop. I mean, I'm just... I have nothing. I have no tentpole story I'm working on. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I have...

Usually when I build an hour, I usually have something really great when I'm building it, something really great that I can go, at least I got that. And then I got two things I'm working on and I go, at least they'll see that. They'll know that that was what I was working on. I don't know.

Usually when I build an hour, I usually have something really great when I'm building it, something really great that I can go, at least I got that. And then I got two things I'm working on and I go, at least they'll see that. They'll know that that was what I was working on. I don't know.

Usually when I build an hour, I usually have something really great when I'm building it, something really great that I can go, at least I got that. And then I got two things I'm working on and I go, at least they'll see that. They'll know that that was what I was working on. I don't know.

I'm like, I got one story that's... I got a couple stories that are okay, but like... When did your special come out? March? Yeah, and I took... I made a mistake. I took 11 months off, and I should have never done that. No, I think you did the right thing. I think I'm so far removed from stand-up that like... It really is the first time in my life where it's taking a minute to get the rust off.

I'm like, I got one story that's... I got a couple stories that are okay, but like... When did your special come out? March? Yeah, and I took... I made a mistake. I took 11 months off, and I should have never done that. No, I think you did the right thing. I think I'm so far removed from stand-up that like... It really is the first time in my life where it's taking a minute to get the rust off.

I'm like, I got one story that's... I got a couple stories that are okay, but like... When did your special come out? March? Yeah, and I took... I made a mistake. I took 11 months off, and I should have never done that. No, I think you did the right thing. I think I'm so far removed from stand-up that like... It really is the first time in my life where it's taking a minute to get the rust off.

That's fine, though. That's good. And the people in Hawaii were awesome. I opened with a fucking... I opened with a James Cook, the women of Hawaii joke. How'd that land? Not well. What's the angle on it? Like, I wish I was James Cook? No, I said, you know, one of my favorite stories about James Cook, and everyone's like, we're not huge fans of that guy.

That's fine, though. That's good. And the people in Hawaii were awesome. I opened with a fucking... I opened with a James Cook, the women of Hawaii joke. How'd that land? Not well. What's the angle on it? Like, I wish I was James Cook? No, I said, you know, one of my favorite stories about James Cook, and everyone's like, we're not huge fans of that guy.