Bert Kreischer

I found my girl last night. Who? I got to share this. I said this last night. So every night, girls, when we do this, girls put their heads back and we pour shots in their mouth. I am astounded at how great dentistry is in America. Dentistry? I'm just amazed at how many sets of perfect teeth I look at. Perfect teeth. Now, I have a thing. I have a fucked up mouth.

I found my girl last night. Who? I got to share this. I said this last night. So every night, girls, when we do this, girls put their heads back and we pour shots in their mouth. I am astounded at how great dentistry is in America. Dentistry? I'm just amazed at how many sets of perfect teeth I look at. Perfect teeth. Now, I have a thing. I have a fucked up mouth.

I got hit in the mouth with a baseball bat when I was a kid. I have like 26 fake teeth, like posts. And then some are bonded. Some are crowns. My molars are shit. Like, I have a real fucked up mouth. I often think the day I die, I'll go, well, thank God I didn't have to get dental work. You know?

I got hit in the mouth with a baseball bat when I was a kid. I have like 26 fake teeth, like posts. And then some are bonded. Some are crowns. My molars are shit. Like, I have a real fucked up mouth. I often think the day I die, I'll go, well, thank God I didn't have to get dental work. You know?

I got hit in the mouth with a baseball bat when I was a kid. I have like 26 fake teeth, like posts. And then some are bonded. Some are crowns. My molars are shit. Like, I have a real fucked up mouth. I often think the day I die, I'll go, well, thank God I didn't have to get dental work. You know?

and so that's a really cool outlook one of the craziest things i have is i have these bumps in at the bottom of my mouth they're like i can show them to you but they're kind of crazy and i know i have them but i and i kind of i don't hide them but i've never seen anyone have them i owe it under your tongue under my tongue i'll show you it's kind of creepy and my mouth is fucking sucks but

and so that's a really cool outlook one of the craziest things i have is i have these bumps in at the bottom of my mouth they're like i can show them to you but they're kind of crazy and i know i have them but i and i kind of i don't hide them but i've never seen anyone have them i owe it under your tongue under my tongue i'll show you it's kind of creepy and my mouth is fucking sucks but

and so that's a really cool outlook one of the craziest things i have is i have these bumps in at the bottom of my mouth they're like i can show them to you but they're kind of crazy and i know i have them but i and i kind of i don't hide them but i've never seen anyone have them i owe it under your tongue under my tongue i'll show you it's kind of creepy and my mouth is fucking sucks but

Yeah. What are those? Okay, so I've never known. I've never known. They showed up in college is when I first noticed them. I had like a bump. I played with it and I was like, what the fuck is that? And I was dipping at the time. I was like, fuck, it's cancer. And then another one showed up. I was like, god damn, it's really cancer. And now I have four. And my sister. Wait, she has them?

Yeah. What are those? Okay, so I've never known. I've never known. They showed up in college is when I first noticed them. I had like a bump. I played with it and I was like, what the fuck is that? And I was dipping at the time. I was like, fuck, it's cancer. And then another one showed up. I was like, god damn, it's really cancer. And now I have four. And my sister. Wait, she has them?

Yeah. What are those? Okay, so I've never known. I've never known. They showed up in college is when I first noticed them. I had like a bump. I played with it and I was like, what the fuck is that? And I was dipping at the time. I was like, fuck, it's cancer. And then another one showed up. I was like, god damn, it's really cancer. And now I have four. And my sister. Wait, she has them?

My sister has them. My sister, Coddy, has them.

My sister has them. My sister, Coddy, has them.

My sister has them. My sister, Coddy, has them.

Yeah, and I've gone to dentists, and I've asked them about them. Some people have them. That's it? I'm sure it's a condition or whatever, but dentists have never said anything. They don't affect anything. They don't affect anything, but I have these bumps. Well, I have always looked, when we pour shots in girls' mouths, for someone that has my bumps. Like, I've always looked for it.

Yeah, and I've gone to dentists, and I've asked them about them. Some people have them. That's it? I'm sure it's a condition or whatever, but dentists have never said anything. They don't affect anything. They don't affect anything, but I have these bumps. Well, I have always looked, when we pour shots in girls' mouths, for someone that has my bumps. Like, I've always looked for it.

Yeah, and I've gone to dentists, and I've asked them about them. Some people have them. That's it? I'm sure it's a condition or whatever, but dentists have never said anything. They don't affect anything. They don't affect anything, but I have these bumps. Well, I have always looked, when we pour shots in girls' mouths, for someone that has my bumps. Like, I've always looked for it.

Last night, girl fucking, I think it's a girl with a vibrator. She puts her mouth back, and I see my bumps. And I go, I got the same mouth you do. And she immediately knew what I was talking about. And we started talking, and her boyfriend jumped in. He's like, easy, that's my girlfriend. I go, no, no, no, no, no. I go, you know what I'm talking about. And I showed her, and she went, ah.

Last night, girl fucking, I think it's a girl with a vibrator. She puts her mouth back, and I see my bumps. And I go, I got the same mouth you do. And she immediately knew what I was talking about. And we started talking, and her boyfriend jumped in. He's like, easy, that's my girlfriend. I go, no, no, no, no, no. I go, you know what I'm talking about. And I showed her, and she went, ah.

Last night, girl fucking, I think it's a girl with a vibrator. She puts her mouth back, and I see my bumps. And I go, I got the same mouth you do. And she immediately knew what I was talking about. And we started talking, and her boyfriend jumped in. He's like, easy, that's my girlfriend. I go, no, no, no, no, no. I go, you know what I'm talking about. And I showed her, and she went, ah.