André Duqum
Appearances
Know Thyself
E132 - Jeff Krasno: “Comfort is Killing You” - Know THIS about Stress & Anxiety
them encroaching you know in my case a few houses away very close to him as well in the canyon where we live and um you know there's going to be a lot of themes i'm sure that'll show up throughout this podcast about what stress is how anxiety shows up um how modern conveniences and comfort really leads to chronic disease and so much but jeff thanks for being here man
Know Thyself
E132 - Jeff Krasno: “Comfort is Killing You” - Know THIS about Stress & Anxiety
Thanks, brother. Yeah.
Know Thyself
E132 - Jeff Krasno: “Comfort is Killing You” - Know THIS about Stress & Anxiety
Yeah, you've said that chronic disease is the cause of chronic ease or the result of chronic ease.
Know Thyself
E132 - Jeff Krasno: “Comfort is Killing You” - Know THIS about Stress & Anxiety
And in so many ways, our biology has been hijacked by modern living. And there is that evolutionary mismatch on so many different levels, right?
Know Thyself
E132 - Jeff Krasno: “Comfort is Killing You” - Know THIS about Stress & Anxiety
The Big Macs. I love you. I loved you reading about that because there are so many different ways
Know Thyself
E132 - Jeff Krasno: “Comfort is Killing You” - Know THIS about Stress & Anxiety
in every area of life of how we're living so if you were to take a big overview because of course we could go into every individual system and you know that would take forever but like starting with the overview of it all what would you say are the most important things to remind ourselves of how our current living is directly at odds with how our biology has evolved
Know Thyself
E132 - Jeff Krasno: “Comfort is Killing You” - Know THIS about Stress & Anxiety
Those were the two activities that first came to mind for you.
Know Thyself
E132 - Jeff Krasno: “Comfort is Killing You” - Know THIS about Stress & Anxiety
This show is sponsored by BetterHelp. It's the start of a new year, and isn't it fascinating how so many New Year's resolutions are often abandoned by February? If you're in a chapter of life where you're craving more accountability or someone to talk to who can support you from a holistic sense, finding the right therapist or guide can be an absolute game changer.
Know Thyself
E132 - Jeff Krasno: “Comfort is Killing You” - Know THIS about Stress & Anxiety
I believe that real growth often comes from unlearning. It's counterintuitive. We tend to think that to achieve what we want in life, we just need to change our actions. But when we dig a little bit deeper, we realize that so many of our behaviors are just the tip of the iceberg. At the root of it all is our identity that shapes our beliefs, which influence our thoughts.
Know Thyself
E132 - Jeff Krasno: “Comfort is Killing You” - Know THIS about Stress & Anxiety
Our thoughts affect our feelings. Those feelings drive our actions, ultimately determining the results that we're going to experience in life. And so if we want to see different results in our life, we need to dig deeper beneath the surface and explore what's truly at the core of who we are and who we're not. That's where the real transformation happens, in my opinion.
Know Thyself
E132 - Jeff Krasno: “Comfort is Killing You” - Know THIS about Stress & Anxiety
And I think having a personal guide can serve as a powerful mirror, helping us unlearn old belief systems, heal, and ultimately build a life we desire. And that's where BetterHelp can help. It's entirely online, convenient, and designed to fit your schedule. Write your story with BetterHelp.com. Visit betterhelp.com slash knowthyself today and get 10% off your first month.
Know Thyself
E132 - Jeff Krasno: “Comfort is Killing You” - Know THIS about Stress & Anxiety
That's betterhelp, H-E-L-P.com slash knowthyself. I hope you enjoy it. Back to the show. Yeah, so from the perspective of sedentary lifestyle, ultra processed foods, the illusion of social connection through our phones, which aren't actually feeding the needs that we have there and have evolved to,
Know Thyself
E132 - Jeff Krasno: “Comfort is Killing You” - Know THIS about Stress & Anxiety
from the information deluge that we get and have access to every terrible thing that's happening on the planet at once, the overwhelm of information processing. I think most people are pretty aware that those are the things that are not built to create more harmony, vitality, and well-being for the human system. And yet, as the saying goes, to know and not to do is not to know. And so...
Know Thyself
E132 - Jeff Krasno: “Comfort is Killing You” - Know THIS about Stress & Anxiety
You have sort of a philosophy, kind of the Tao of health that I would love to go over as well, because it creates a powerful framework to reclaim sovereignty. Like, as you say, we are the culmination of billions of years of evolution, this kind of cosmic intelligence cultivating to this human body and mind that is vastly intelligent.
Know Thyself
E132 - Jeff Krasno: “Comfort is Killing You” - Know THIS about Stress & Anxiety
And our behaviors undermine it every single day, often without us realizing how good we can feel. And I think at least the intention for this podcast is to really remind people that being human feels awesome when our system gets what it's designed to.
Know Thyself
E132 - Jeff Krasno: “Comfort is Killing You” - Know THIS about Stress & Anxiety
What do you think about the utility of being in a less than ideal environment as the metaphor of the lotus flower goes? Yeah.
Know Thyself
E132 - Jeff Krasno: “Comfort is Killing You” - Know THIS about Stress & Anxiety
Yeah, I was reading, funny enough, this caption from John Mayer, of all people. One of the things he wrote was, next to the immeasurable loss of life is the loss of proof of life. And I remember just moments after getting the evacuation notice for where we live, coming back into the studio,
Know Thyself
E132 - Jeff Krasno: “Comfort is Killing You” - Know THIS about Stress & Anxiety
Beautifully said, yeah. So those four pillars being impermanence, interdependence, agency, and balance. I think we have, and I know you and your podcast and other conversations I have, really explored at depth more of the nuance of each of those categories of how we're out of balance with the evolutionary mismatch.
Know Thyself
E132 - Jeff Krasno: “Comfort is Killing You” - Know THIS about Stress & Anxiety
I am personally kind of like, it's so important to have that as a foundation and build those habits and routines that, you know, that build that. And for me, I'm also just very interested in kind of those first two pillars, you know, and the impermanence and interdependence and the recognition of that and putting that into practice in daily life.
Know Thyself
E132 - Jeff Krasno: “Comfort is Killing You” - Know THIS about Stress & Anxiety
And anicca, which is the Pali term you referenced earlier about impermanence, is what I really try to continue to cultivate that awareness of.
Know Thyself
E132 - Jeff Krasno: “Comfort is Killing You” - Know THIS about Stress & Anxiety
looking around here and being like wow i'm so grateful to have built this and how this is really an antenna for a much larger community likewise where where you live and it's so surreal to see it you know um and permanently be so held and you know literally by which way the wind blows yeah well yeah i mean there's a practice in in stoicism um
Know Thyself
E132 - Jeff Krasno: “Comfort is Killing You” - Know THIS about Stress & Anxiety
And through my meditation practices and this meditation retreat I just got back from last month, there is a beautiful amount of freedom, of equanimity, recognition of that balance and homeostasis when you are holding things so loosely because you see how constantly they are changing. And you can look at it from the biological level like you did, but then also getting into the physics of it.
Know Thyself
E132 - Jeff Krasno: “Comfort is Killing You” - Know THIS about Stress & Anxiety
you know, from the Buddhist, I suppose, scientific, but less kind of modern scientific lens, describing it as a kalapa, which are the smallest particles arising and passing away, like the smallest perceivable possible, like you can't even perceive it, which is why we have this illusion of continuity within our experience.
Know Thyself
E132 - Jeff Krasno: “Comfort is Killing You” - Know THIS about Stress & Anxiety
You know, we navigate this world as though we are the solid self moving through time and space. And yet that's actually not the case.
Know Thyself
E132 - Jeff Krasno: “Comfort is Killing You” - Know THIS about Stress & Anxiety
I agree. Yeah, well said, man. I feel that so much of... the tension that we build is kind of self-wound in life and it stems solely fundamentally in the tightly held identity and misidentification with who we think we are kind of really strongly feeling as though we are our thoughts and emotions and you know it's like
Know Thyself
E132 - Jeff Krasno: “Comfort is Killing You” - Know THIS about Stress & Anxiety
Building awareness and equanimity are like two birds, two wings of a bird, you know, that of equal balance really help the bird fly. And the cultivation of that awareness of our essential nature, suddenly the stress that we are very much so a participant in building throughout our life,
Know Thyself
E132 - Jeff Krasno: “Comfort is Killing You” - Know THIS about Stress & Anxiety
gets shed light on because through the conversations that we're having through the decisions that we make through the relationships that we have so much of it is uh often i feel like we're under the presumption that things are just happening to us like we are on the bad end of the stick for so many things that are happening yeah and the freedom from that from that tension that we keep on creating is uh
Know Thyself
E132 - Jeff Krasno: “Comfort is Killing You” - Know THIS about Stress & Anxiety
It's just really important and I think is often overlooked in kind of, you know, the spiritual aspect of stress and anxiety in a lot of these conversations. Yeah. Yeah.
Know Thyself
E132 - Jeff Krasno: “Comfort is Killing You” - Know THIS about Stress & Anxiety
And also perceived deaths. For example, being wrong in a conversation is a perceived death of sorts.
Know Thyself
E132 - Jeff Krasno: “Comfort is Killing You” - Know THIS about Stress & Anxiety
I believe in the dictionary, it actually delineates humans as separate from nature. No. Looking up in Webster dictionary, like humans are completely separate. And it makes sense with the current mythos and story that we're telling ourselves as a human species and the cascade and...
Know Thyself
E132 - Jeff Krasno: “Comfort is Killing You” - Know THIS about Stress & Anxiety
deleterious effects that that has on our psyche and beliefs about the world and human possibility and i know you have found great intrigue in studying both western and eastern understandings of human potential because A lot of the talk about stress can be quite stressful, funny enough. You know, it's like more things to do on your plate of things you don't want to do.
Know Thyself
E132 - Jeff Krasno: “Comfort is Killing You” - Know THIS about Stress & Anxiety
And I have found it quite inspiring looking at... what this human system is capable of, much of which we're still barely scratching the surface of discovering, you know. I found it fascinating reading about the Himalayan monks who, through the practice of tummo, and there's many different examples of, you know,
Know Thyself
E132 - Jeff Krasno: “Comfort is Killing You” - Know THIS about Stress & Anxiety
yogis displaying incredible powers over their physiology and biology that are just so far from our Western notion of what it means to be human. And I think things like that really do at least inspire me as to I want to deeply uncover what the intelligence of life has possible to, you know, birth through me.
Know Thyself
E132 - Jeff Krasno: “Comfort is Killing You” - Know THIS about Stress & Anxiety
And that requires me to live my life in a certain way so my fundamental physical is taken care of and I can explore kind of the higher things up and the hierarchy of Maslow, if you will.
Know Thyself
E132 - Jeff Krasno: “Comfort is Killing You” - Know THIS about Stress & Anxiety
Yeah, I'm curious if you want to share about that.
Know Thyself
E132 - Jeff Krasno: “Comfort is Killing You” - Know THIS about Stress & Anxiety
Which you spent a considerable amount of time with.
Know Thyself
E132 - Jeff Krasno: “Comfort is Killing You” - Know THIS about Stress & Anxiety
Yes, it's so, so interesting to hold that and the insights that both of us have also garnered in our personal study and meditation practices and the people we get to have conversations with about this. And then you're faced with the reality of, you know, being evacuated at least for a couple weeks outside of your home, not knowing for sure if it's going to still be standing.
Know Thyself
E132 - Jeff Krasno: “Comfort is Killing You” - Know THIS about Stress & Anxiety
And then, like you mentioned, that survivor's guilt of so many, like, you know, dozens of friends of both of ours who have lost their home.
Know Thyself
E132 - Jeff Krasno: “Comfort is Killing You” - Know THIS about Stress & Anxiety
don't have the luxury of coming back to it like we have after a couple of weeks, you know, where there's over 24 human deaths, over 10,000 homes burned in LA and the Palisades and Altadena and beyond fires and 100, 200 plus billion dollars in damage, however you want to estimate it. Just insane. The largest urban fire to have ever existed, right? So surreal. It's very interesting and very testing.
Know Thyself
E132 - Jeff Krasno: “Comfort is Killing You” - Know THIS about Stress & Anxiety
Yeah, I really feel like the more your circle of knowledge grows, so does the perimeter of your ignorance. So you're aware of how much you don't know, of how much you're unaware of, in a sense. Totally. The more you grow.
Know Thyself
E132 - Jeff Krasno: “Comfort is Killing You” - Know THIS about Stress & Anxiety
I'm curious what your vision of dying and growing through age with grace and consciousness look like. I feel like we often see this push for a further lifespan, but like the last 15 plus years of life just filled with degeneration. Yeah. you know, not very enjoyable existence. And I'm very motivated by living a long lifespan and health span.
Know Thyself
E132 - Jeff Krasno: “Comfort is Killing You” - Know THIS about Stress & Anxiety
And so I think that's a, as we all look forward to in who knows what's going to evolve over the next 10 years with, you know, longevity, escape velocity and all the things. But, you know, God willing, our impermanent nature continues on for a little bit more in this flesh suit until we're 80, 90 years old. And I want to be able to be very mobile and I will be. And so what is your vision for that?
Know Thyself
E132 - Jeff Krasno: “Comfort is Killing You” - Know THIS about Stress & Anxiety
It is very testing to put into practice The practice. That's right.
Know Thyself
E132 - Jeff Krasno: “Comfort is Killing You” - Know THIS about Stress & Anxiety
I like to leave things as practical as possible for what has really moved the needle the most for you. And as you've done your hefty research into both the personal mystical and the medical, what would you say having... knowledge of our whole conversation here today that would be most effective and impactful for listeners to leave off with.
Know Thyself
E132 - Jeff Krasno: “Comfort is Killing You” - Know THIS about Stress & Anxiety
And anybody who's ever exercised or done a sauna or a cold plunge or the various things you can do can feel how they're inseparably tied.
Know Thyself
E132 - Jeff Krasno: “Comfort is Killing You” - Know THIS about Stress & Anxiety
It's been a pleasure to be here with you now. Yes, brother.
Know Thyself
E132 - Jeff Krasno: “Comfort is Killing You” - Know THIS about Stress & Anxiety
Yeah, no, man. It's my pleasure doing such great work in the world. And our missions are very, very much so similarly aligned. You know, this is a strange start to 2025. Yeah. And I know firsthand we both know the power of community and supporting one another, being there for each other during these times. And...
Know Thyself
E132 - Jeff Krasno: “Comfort is Killing You” - Know THIS about Stress & Anxiety
We both have our physical in-person community here in LA and then our wider net through podcasts and the digital space where people are coming together in these shared values and recognition of these important reminders. And in that is something very exciting. You know, it's perhaps the most exciting thing to me and I know for you as well. Because so much becomes possible in that space.
Know Thyself
E132 - Jeff Krasno: “Comfort is Killing You” - Know THIS about Stress & Anxiety
And hopefully it's a gift for you all too. I like to think so. Well, I hope you enjoyed it. If you made it this far, Jeff, thank you so much. And people can find your book, Good Stress, which is available for pre-order, I believe, right?
Know Thyself
E132 - Jeff Krasno: “Comfort is Killing You” - Know THIS about Stress & Anxiety
In the description as always. Thank you guys for tuning in. Until next week. Peace.
Know Thyself
E132 - Jeff Krasno: “Comfort is Killing You” - Know THIS about Stress & Anxiety
yeah i saw that so much so and just uh yeah immense gratitude for the firefighters who held the line you know outside of um where we're at and it's just so inspiring to see community at least where we're at and throughout la people activating you know because when you find out okay you've been spared now you know it empathy and you know the sympathetic response for you know wanting to be there for other people is really amazing
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E132 - Jeff Krasno: “Comfort is Killing You” - Know THIS about Stress & Anxiety
and often what is actually needed is to take action and to you know help and organize and raise money and do the things to really support the people because um you know this is a long enduring thing especially the air and water quality here now it's like a lot is kind of in the unknown but grateful very grateful to be here with you today um back in the saddle
Know Thyself
E132 - Jeff Krasno: “Comfort is Killing You” - Know THIS about Stress & Anxiety
Hey, everyone. Welcome back to Know Thyself. It's been an interesting past couple weeks just hopping back on the podcast saddle. And I missed you guys. I'm joined today with a dear friend, Jeff Krasnow, who is... creator, founder of One Commune, which is an amazing, really pioneering organization, community podcast.
Know Thyself
E132 - Jeff Krasno: “Comfort is Killing You” - Know THIS about Stress & Anxiety
It really confronts us with, you know, the inherent nature, which is always already existing when a crisis happens and you're like the blaring possibility of your house being burned down is like very obvious and kind of gross and dense in that, right?
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E132 - Jeff Krasno: “Comfort is Killing You” - Know THIS about Stress & Anxiety
And it is, at least for me, an invitation to remember that as the impermanent nature with all aspects of life, you know, with everyone we love, all the things that we cherish, all the memories that we hold, and ultimately our own physical body, you know? And so, again, putting that stuff into practice has been... been important.
Know Thyself
E132 - Jeff Krasno: “Comfort is Killing You” - Know THIS about Stress & Anxiety
And alongside this time in the next coming months, you have a new book coming out called Good Stress, which I think highlights a lot of the really important reminders that we need currently societally, culturally, as we've lost our way in so many different ways.
Know Thyself
E132 - Jeff Krasno: “Comfort is Killing You” - Know THIS about Stress & Anxiety
And so when you look at stress, to start diving in here, how do you delineate and how much delineation is really worthwhile here between the mental and the physical?
Know Thyself
E132 - Jeff Krasno: “Comfort is Killing You” - Know THIS about Stress & Anxiety
the physiological and the psychological stress, because I think we live in a Western society, which really likes to separate a lot of things instead of looking at the human body as an integrative holistic system, which I know you love to do. So how do you kind of view what stress is and how it affects our mind and body?
Know Thyself
E132 - Jeff Krasno: “Comfort is Killing You” - Know THIS about Stress & Anxiety
I was working outside naked in the sun one day. Of course. And I turn around, there's a rattlesnake literally a foot away from me. There you go.
Know Thyself
E132 - Jeff Krasno: “Comfort is Killing You” - Know THIS about Stress & Anxiety
Not really. I captured it. You captured it? Okay, good for you. Far away.
Know Thyself
E132 - Jeff Krasno: “Comfort is Killing You” - Know THIS about Stress & Anxiety
He also is a co-creator of Wanderlust, which was a series and is a series of global wellness events. And he also lives in the same town as I did, which we were just talking beforehand about the wild journey of these LA fires. And
Know Thyself
E136 - Jillian Turecki: How To Find Love, Keep Love & Become Love
I know, for sure. So I'm curious how much you see, like, for example... When people talk about like we go out and try to date our parents and we look for what's familiar and that feels safe to us. Even if love showed up in a chaotic format when we were younger, it feels safer to us because it's familiar. Yeah.
Know Thyself
E136 - Jillian Turecki: How To Find Love, Keep Love & Become Love
How do you navigate getting awareness and bringing mindfulness to people that are projecting a lot of that stuff?
Know Thyself
E136 - Jillian Turecki: How To Find Love, Keep Love & Become Love
Yeah, and it also feels like It's inevitable that friction and tension will show up in relationship dynamics. It's almost perfectly designed to bring up our stuff.
Know Thyself
E136 - Jillian Turecki: How To Find Love, Keep Love & Become Love
How helpful do you feel like it is to come into relationships with the knowing that they are a mirror? I think that invites the opportunity to view challenges as they arise as opportunities for growth.
Know Thyself
E136 - Jillian Turecki: How To Find Love, Keep Love & Become Love
Yeah, we don't often like to look at what our part is in play here.
Know Thyself
E136 - Jillian Turecki: How To Find Love, Keep Love & Become Love
What would you say then, because there is this difference between character versus charm.
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E136 - Jillian Turecki: How To Find Love, Keep Love & Become Love
And there is the infatuation with the parts of somebody's being that are flashy or very enchanting at the beginning. Yeah. But then there is the reality of what ingredients are actually necessary for the longevity of a relationship to be there. Yes. And what do you feel like those are?
Know Thyself
E136 - Jillian Turecki: How To Find Love, Keep Love & Become Love
Because if we have the former, which is great to have, you know, the charm and the chemistry and all that, but the deepening of the compatibility and like those alignment of values, those things that we really need to be asking ourselves and also in communication with somebody we're starting to date.
Know Thyself
E136 - Jillian Turecki: How To Find Love, Keep Love & Become Love
What are those most important questions and things we need to...
Know Thyself
E136 - Jillian Turecki: How To Find Love, Keep Love & Become Love
That's so different from the dating rhetoric that's like the game.
Know Thyself
E136 - Jillian Turecki: How To Find Love, Keep Love & Become Love
Yeah. No, tough. Yeah. And, you know, you start out in your new book with that story, which really sets up the frame for the journey that you would then go on over the past decade now.
Know Thyself
E136 - Jillian Turecki: How To Find Love, Keep Love & Become Love
What are other distinguishing factors between lust and love?
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E136 - Jillian Turecki: How To Find Love, Keep Love & Become Love
For those that really would love to attract the love in their life and they assert that's something that they're striving to go for right now at this at this phase what do you see is the balance between the strategies to go and meet people and the apps and all the things versus focusing more so on the inner work to become a vibratory match to attract the love that you seek
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E136 - Jillian Turecki: How To Find Love, Keep Love & Become Love
What do you see as that moment and that time as a turning point for your life and the direction you shifted after that?
Know Thyself
E136 - Jillian Turecki: How To Find Love, Keep Love & Become Love
I think we're really fundamentally attracted to people who are confident within themselves and at ease and open within themselves. And a lot of us yearn also to arrive at that place. And your truth number four, which is you have to love yourself, is... you know, is a common saying in the relationship scene, right?
Know Thyself
E136 - Jillian Turecki: How To Find Love, Keep Love & Become Love
And it's probably the most Instagrammable, you know, hashtag of hashtag love yourself.
Know Thyself
E136 - Jillian Turecki: How To Find Love, Keep Love & Become Love
So I would love for you to demystify a little bit. And especially, you know, in the moments where it's hard to, like, you know, when you... You know, talked about your journey over 10 years ago, going through that part. You know, that point, I'm sure there was many points where it was hard to love yourself.
Know Thyself
E136 - Jillian Turecki: How To Find Love, Keep Love & Become Love
And I'm curious for you to walk us through the journey of starting to pick yourself up by your bootstraps and then what it actually looks like over years to develop that relationship with yourself.
Know Thyself
E136 - Jillian Turecki: How To Find Love, Keep Love & Become Love
Right, because if we don't have a degree of self-acceptance when meeting somebody, then we're in many ways attracting somebody through the lens of our own inadequacy, which then, of course, if both people are willing to grow, that can be a container for moving past that.
Know Thyself
E136 - Jillian Turecki: How To Find Love, Keep Love & Become Love
But if you're also meeting somebody who is seeking that and there is that kind of shadow or trauma bonding or whatever that looks like.
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E136 - Jillian Turecki: How To Find Love, Keep Love & Become Love
Mm-hmm. Yeah, I've seen that for sure. Also, just like in the culture, I feel like I grew up in my parents, parents, friends, where that's just sort of normalized in certain dynamics. And we get very safe and comfortable in that dynamic. And yeah, it takes real courage to break those chains of generational, you know, cultural conditioning.
Know Thyself
E136 - Jillian Turecki: How To Find Love, Keep Love & Become Love
Hey guys, speaking of relationships, this episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. I feel like we always hear about red flags in relationships, but what about green flags? Challenges in relationships are inevitable, and if choosing a life partner is one of the most important decisions we're ever gonna make, which I definitely feel like it is,
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E136 - Jillian Turecki: How To Find Love, Keep Love & Become Love
then taking the time to reflect on the values and qualities that truly matter is essential. Not to just avoid conflict, but to build a partnership where you work as a team to navigate whatever comes your way. For me, a few of my biggest values and green flags are self-awareness, personal responsibility, and play.
Know Thyself
E136 - Jillian Turecki: How To Find Love, Keep Love & Become Love
Maybe for you, it's someone's ability to truly listen, their sense of adventure or their nurturing presence. Just as important as knowing what we're looking for though, is doing the inner work to become a vibratory match for the love we want to attract in the first place. And therapy can be a massive support in that process of healing. developing clarity, and refining our values in life.
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E136 - Jillian Turecki: How To Find Love, Keep Love & Become Love
BetterHelp makes therapy accessible and flexible. It's fully online and connects you with a network of over 30,000 credentialed therapists. You can switch therapists at any time at no extra cost, making it easy to find the right fit. Discover your relationship with green flags with BetterHelp. Visit betterhelp.com slash know thyself today and get 10% off your first month.
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E136 - Jillian Turecki: How To Find Love, Keep Love & Become Love
That's betterhelp.com slash know thyself. Back to the show. What is a hot take or strongly held belief you have around what love means in this culture and dating and love means in this culture that you think is just not true?
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E136 - Jillian Turecki: How To Find Love, Keep Love & Become Love
And, you know. I think we all love a good Disney movie once in a while.
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E136 - Jillian Turecki: How To Find Love, Keep Love & Become Love
Yeah, that's what I'm saying is like those stories, which are, you know, great and enchanting, they also plant seeds throughout the conscious mind and subconscious mind of humanity and culture that there is a soulmate. There is like someone that you find and it's just the right person. Instead of thinking we find the right person, you kind of forge it, you know, and...
Know Thyself
E136 - Jillian Turecki: How To Find Love, Keep Love & Become Love
I would love for you to dissect that a little bit of thinking that we have a soulmate. That's the one right person that we're going to find in our life versus we build that.
Know Thyself
E136 - Jillian Turecki: How To Find Love, Keep Love & Become Love
I would say also largely because we intuit at the deepest level that we are one.
Know Thyself
E136 - Jillian Turecki: How To Find Love, Keep Love & Become Love
I like that idea that, you know, Girlfriend I had at 17 and the one I had at 24, they weren't not the right one. They were the right one for the time of my life that I was in, in my own stage of development. And if I were to meet the person I'm going to end up with, probably at 16, I don't think we'd probably, who knows, it probably wouldn't drive the same.
Know Thyself
E136 - Jillian Turecki: How To Find Love, Keep Love & Become Love
So I think that is inviting a sense of just like life's timing has a way of bringing those relationships and dynamics in when... We're ready for them.
Know Thyself
E136 - Jillian Turecki: How To Find Love, Keep Love & Become Love
Do you have couples that you look up to that have been together for 40, 50 plus years?
Know Thyself
E136 - Jillian Turecki: How To Find Love, Keep Love & Become Love
I'm curious, you know, from that vantage point, when do you decide when inevitable difficulties arise in relationships and you're not sure and you're at the brink of, you know, letting go and the death of the dynamic of how it has been? Not sure exactly in the uncertainty of what will take form after that. At what point is,
Know Thyself
E136 - Jillian Turecki: How To Find Love, Keep Love & Become Love
is it really meant to be let go of the relationship dynamic or, um, is it meant to, you know, endure a double down, figure it out?
Know Thyself
E136 - Jillian Turecki: How To Find Love, Keep Love & Become Love
It invites the perspective to truly know and reflect on the reason why you're leaving a relationship. And if it's simply because a lack of willingness to look at your own stuff, then it's just going to show up in the next dynamic.
Know Thyself
E136 - Jillian Turecki: How To Find Love, Keep Love & Become Love
But then there's, I guess, fundamental misalignment and you believe people can just genuinely just grow in different directions.
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E136 - Jillian Turecki: How To Find Love, Keep Love & Become Love
Yeah, I think there's part of us that almost expects or hopes that our partner is not going to change from who we met. And it feels like the biggest illusion because that's the only thing we ever do.
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E136 - Jillian Turecki: How To Find Love, Keep Love & Become Love
I think in discerning between how long one stays in a relationship, whether they want to embark on that journey with somebody, we can have this over-romanticization of potential. And that's great to hold the potential of who somebody can be, but almost the expectation of it is what sucks the energy from the dynamic versus admitting the current patterns that somebody has.
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E136 - Jillian Turecki: How To Find Love, Keep Love & Become Love
And of course, if somebody's willing to grow, like if somebody has willingness to change and grow and like that is a core value and pillar between both of you, then that is probably one of the most important things. But what do you think about, yeah, that falling in love with potential over the pattern?
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E136 - Jillian Turecki: How To Find Love, Keep Love & Become Love
Facts. Yeah, that's good. That's good stuff. Yeah, I think it's just such an insidious like thing too, because we don't realize we're doing it. Oftentimes, like we don't see how we're getting into a dynamic with the hope of what something might be, you know, and I feel like it's natural. And it's, it's become normalized to to try to have a savior complex or wanted to fix somebody.
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E136 - Jillian Turecki: How To Find Love, Keep Love & Become Love
It seems really noble, but it's also just reinforcing our own sense of inadequacy and feeling like we need to be the fixer.
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E136 - Jillian Turecki: How To Find Love, Keep Love & Become Love
Yeah. Do you think that the best thing that we can truly do if we want to inspire change is to be at ourself? Would you say that?
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E136 - Jillian Turecki: How To Find Love, Keep Love & Become Love
When meeting somebody in the courting phase, what are some red flags that you wouldn't presume or maybe expect or perceive are red flags in the moment?
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E136 - Jillian Turecki: How To Find Love, Keep Love & Become Love
Yeah. And it feels like the more you refine your capacity to listen, you can see where certain behaviors are actually coming from. And one that comes to mind is like being nice versus being kind.
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E136 - Jillian Turecki: How To Find Love, Keep Love & Become Love
Like being nice appears like it's a nice, it's a kind gesture, but in reality it can actually be quite manipulative.
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E136 - Jillian Turecki: How To Find Love, Keep Love & Become Love
Versus kindness is like genuine and from the heart.
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E136 - Jillian Turecki: How To Find Love, Keep Love & Become Love
And I'm just curious what you think about that because yeah, niceness can often be that behavioral compensation. Yeah. For various fears, you know?
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E136 - Jillian Turecki: How To Find Love, Keep Love & Become Love
Yeah. Always hindsight is clear looking back and in the moment, you know, death of a life feels like death.
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E136 - Jillian Turecki: How To Find Love, Keep Love & Become Love
I was driving with a friend a while back and... I think this is quite common with Canadians, actually. Canadians are very nice. Not to over-pathologize, and I think there is just a cultural component for sure. But he is a very genuinely kind spirit. But I saw his tendency to always filter his truth and authenticity with just the cover of niceness.
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E136 - Jillian Turecki: How To Find Love, Keep Love & Become Love
Yeah. Yeah, I'm sure. And It's just, it's just, we crave authenticity and there is a barrier there between authenticity.
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E136 - Jillian Turecki: How To Find Love, Keep Love & Become Love
And oftentimes people that go on to do some amazing things were challenged with incredibly hard situations to face, to overcome, to triumph. And I'm curious, looking back at that point now,
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E136 - Jillian Turecki: How To Find Love, Keep Love & Become Love
And I love even more so the individuals who are maybe a bit more crass and, you know, straight to the point, you know, than, yeah, than the ones that need to kind of coat things because it almost, it almost robs you of the respect that you deserve and dynamics and communication to be truthful. Yeah.
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E136 - Jillian Turecki: How To Find Love, Keep Love & Become Love
Yeah. Trust is a big thing in dynamics.
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E136 - Jillian Turecki: How To Find Love, Keep Love & Become Love
Where I want to take it first is actually how important and pivotal do you think the trust we have ourselves and with life informs the trust we have with another partner? Because we could be in a relationship where we feel very uncertain or not sure if there's going to be a longevity in the connection or if they might leave us or whatever.
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E136 - Jillian Turecki: How To Find Love, Keep Love & Become Love
And I find if somebody has a deeper trust of life's intelligence with a capital I, that that things will ultimately work out and that actually life is inherently uncertain.
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E136 - Jillian Turecki: How To Find Love, Keep Love & Become Love
It breeds some spaciousness, which reduces the clinging, which often actually pushes away.
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E136 - Jillian Turecki: How To Find Love, Keep Love & Become Love
With the past decade under your belt of coaching and writing and teaching and supporting so many people throughout their times of loss and finding a new connection and understanding what love is, it's pushed you and probably equipped you uniquely, unlike any other experience would. You have this capacity within you now because of the depth you've gone yourself, I'm sure.
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E136 - Jillian Turecki: How To Find Love, Keep Love & Become Love
Do you think that there is a solid, like a significant minority of women that have a subconscious anger towards men because of the betrayal in their past?
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E136 - Jillian Turecki: How To Find Love, Keep Love & Become Love
Would you articulate it that there are those blessings and disguises where sometimes losing the love we have makes space for deeper love that we deserve?
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E136 - Jillian Turecki: How To Find Love, Keep Love & Become Love
And so what would you say are the questions you started asking yourself after that moment of challenge? And what are some of those questions that we could be asking ourselves When we face that.
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E136 - Jillian Turecki: How To Find Love, Keep Love & Become Love
Is that the way you choose to look at things?
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E136 - Jillian Turecki: How To Find Love, Keep Love & Become Love
It hits different when it comes from somebody who lives it, you know, and has gone through the hardships of life versus, again, something that intellectually sounds tantalizing.
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E136 - Jillian Turecki: How To Find Love, Keep Love & Become Love
Yeah. I want to get your perspective on a little bit more of that gender stuff. You know, we both see online, but shows up, you know, I think of this kind of idea of we have relational karma, which is like from our parents and our childhood development. We have psychological wounds there within pertaining to both gender dynamics in particular.
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E136 - Jillian Turecki: How To Find Love, Keep Love & Become Love
And then we also have like relational Dharma, which is the aspirational directions that we want to go and where we're shifting to. focusing on the karma side of things first and the trauma that we project so unconsciously often.
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E136 - Jillian Turecki: How To Find Love, Keep Love & Become Love
I'm curious, what as a man, and then from a perspective of a woman, what as a man can we do that you really feel as a woman brings a sense of safety and assurance and that you truly think that is not addressed or brought as readily this day and age?
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E136 - Jillian Turecki: How To Find Love, Keep Love & Become Love
Mm-hmm. Yeah. It just seems like good advice across the board for all, all communications.
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E136 - Jillian Turecki: How To Find Love, Keep Love & Become Love
Yeah. That's great. What do you think on the flip side?
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E136 - Jillian Turecki: How To Find Love, Keep Love & Become Love
For sure. Yeah, I think.
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E136 - Jillian Turecki: How To Find Love, Keep Love & Become Love
Like men, we want to be useful. Useful. Yeah. Very useful. Yeah. Very, very useful. Yeah. Yeah.
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E136 - Jillian Turecki: How To Find Love, Keep Love & Become Love
Yeah. And it feels like it's usually the latter, you know?
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E136 - Jillian Turecki: How To Find Love, Keep Love & Become Love
Yeah. I think another thing too is, And I think every, of course, everyone's different, but there's definitely a level of autonomy and space that also men sometimes crave that often from the female perspective seems like.
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E136 - Jillian Turecki: How To Find Love, Keep Love & Become Love
Yeah. What's the big truth that you feel like we haven't touched on today that would be important?
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E136 - Jillian Turecki: How To Find Love, Keep Love & Become Love
Was there a moment when you had a shift of just viewing your parents as they're my mom and dad versus they're actually a human being person that has their own path?
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E136 - Jillian Turecki: How To Find Love, Keep Love & Become Love
It's a trip to realize it because we've been so like under the assumption that, um, They're just our parents. And I remember having this conversation with Matt Kahn on the podcast, and he talked about his experience of really kind of collapsing the blame and shame put towards his parents and how he got to the place energetically where he saw his father as his brother and his mother as his sister.
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E136 - Jillian Turecki: How To Find Love, Keep Love & Become Love
And how we're all having our own individual human spiritual experience amongst the collective. And it just breeds so much more compassion and also discharges so much of the tension we have and blame and just realize that As the saying goes, hurt people hurt people. And there is just pain inducing more pain in unconscious ways.
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E136 - Jillian Turecki: How To Find Love, Keep Love & Become Love
And it invites us to be able to be the person in our bloodline that breaks that chain.
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E136 - Jillian Turecki: How To Find Love, Keep Love & Become Love
Do you feel like you've made your own way through forgiveness, through those difficult things in your life? Do you feel like you still have things to let go of or forgive on that side of things?
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E136 - Jillian Turecki: How To Find Love, Keep Love & Become Love
And who I think I am is different at different points in my life. That's going to inform what we think we want, right?
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E136 - Jillian Turecki: How To Find Love, Keep Love & Become Love
What's the biggest lesson for you personally, if you're, if you're open to sharing and as it relates to love right now in life for you?
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E136 - Jillian Turecki: How To Find Love, Keep Love & Become Love
And I can reliably see that we always will say we want something we believe we're worthy of. And so it's like there are confines within what we say we want, you know, between subconscious limiting beliefs and self-worth.
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E136 - Jillian Turecki: How To Find Love, Keep Love & Become Love
Choosing a life partner is perhaps the most important decision we will have for the rest of our life. Who we're going to spend the most time with, who will be a witness to our life, who we decide we want to give and support throughout our life. and, um, challenge and, and, and this is going to be inevitable.
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E136 - Jillian Turecki: How To Find Love, Keep Love & Become Love
And I remember, you know, talking with Mark Manson, he was like, it depends just what, what shit sandwich do you want to eat?
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E136 - Jillian Turecki: How To Find Love, Keep Love & Become Love
There's going to be a challenge either way. And of course there's going to be beauty and love and play. And of course the other, either way as well, it's just what fundamental position do you want to orient, orient yourself towards?
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E136 - Jillian Turecki: How To Find Love, Keep Love & Become Love
As you have been being thyself, that's such a funny sentence to say. It is. Last note, as we start to wrap up here, what is your hope and your wish with your book, with your work, that you truly wish to leave on this planet most?
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E136 - Jillian Turecki: How To Find Love, Keep Love & Become Love
And I know a lot of your work is really supporting people stretch to see what they truly are worthy of and are deserving of. What would you say is the thesis and kind of premise with your book, with like a bunch of your work now, what do you boil it down to as the core of what you're trying to support people with?
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E136 - Jillian Turecki: How To Find Love, Keep Love & Become Love
Well said. It's been such a pleasure to connect with you.
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E136 - Jillian Turecki: How To Find Love, Keep Love & Become Love
And have you on the podcast. And yeah, thank you. Thank you so much. And we'll leave links for where people can get connected with your work and your book and everything down below. And yeah, that's all.
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E136 - Jillian Turecki: How To Find Love, Keep Love & Become Love
Great. More convos in the future. Everybody, thanks so much for tuning into this episode of the Know Thyself podcast. Until next week, be well.
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E136 - Jillian Turecki: How To Find Love, Keep Love & Become Love
What do you see as the predominant barriers that stop people from doing so?
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E136 - Jillian Turecki: How To Find Love, Keep Love & Become Love
I think... Life is so trippy where we often project the things we want as only being capable of getting outside of ourself. There's externalization of feelings that we really can only give ourself. And we can, of course, get in the mirrors through relationships and career and things. But in many ways, we truly want to become the love that we seek. And we seek it through many different means.
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E136 - Jillian Turecki: How To Find Love, Keep Love & Become Love
And we want the feelings behind the things that we say we want. And so how much of your work do you see is bringing people back into realizing that they can actually self-source a lot of the things that they are so clinging externally for?
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E136 - Jillian Turecki: How To Find Love, Keep Love & Become Love
Jillian Tarecki, thank you so much for being here.
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E136 - Jillian Turecki: How To Find Love, Keep Love & Become Love
June 2nd, 2014, what happened?
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E136 - Jillian Turecki: How To Find Love, Keep Love & Become Love
Mm-hmm. It's really a persistent delusion. It's so enchanting. And of course, not just with romantic relationships, but so many different things we outsource our sense of joy. And I do think that there is a level of fulfillment that comes with alignment of what you feel like you're here to be doing in your career and being matched with a partner that is in alignment with your values.
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E136 - Jillian Turecki: How To Find Love, Keep Love & Become Love
But there's kind of two routes, right? It's like first we either discover before going to relationships that that delusion is in fact a delusion. Or we learn through the trials and tribulations in the relationship that we're putting our expectations of fulfillment of love solely in another person.
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E136 - Jillian Turecki: How To Find Love, Keep Love & Become Love
And I'm just curious how much of the trife you see in relationships are stemming from an overload of expectations.
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E136 - Jillian Turecki: How To Find Love, Keep Love & Become Love
And the reality of how it happens all the time is very much so unconscious, right? Like we're unaware to the degree in which our subconscious projections are happening. We're just like looking through them. We're too close to our own bullshit in many ways. Yeah.
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E131 - Rainn Wilson: Comedy, God & Why We Need a Spiritual Revolution
Do you think that through time you're able to take that hindsight in a way that your future self will be looking in your current struggles, like as if they have purpose, does that alleviate current pain and struggle?
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E131 - Rainn Wilson: Comedy, God & Why We Need a Spiritual Revolution
What are you currently struggling with to find some resolve there? Like, if you look back at the past couple of decades, what do you feel like you're really needing to get clarity on, like in terms of meaning and purpose there?
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E131 - Rainn Wilson: Comedy, God & Why We Need a Spiritual Revolution
That's a great name. You were about to say thanks as if it was your name.
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E131 - Rainn Wilson: Comedy, God & Why We Need a Spiritual Revolution
Yeah, I think when it comes to the personal level, I'm curious to get your perspective on this. I feel like embarking on a spiritual journey is... a fundamental reorientation of your life, your focus, your energy towards what matters most.
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E131 - Rainn Wilson: Comedy, God & Why We Need a Spiritual Revolution
And when it comes to service and fulfillment and meaning and how we contribute towards others in this life, in a similar way to that story, it's like questioning, asking the questions of what's gonna matter most and can I focus on what are the root issues of so many societal issues? Not that cleaning up rivers isn't needed, it absolutely is.
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E131 - Rainn Wilson: Comedy, God & Why We Need a Spiritual Revolution
And also cleaning up the minds of the people that pollute the rivers, for example, is very important also. I don't know what to say, equally or more or whatever, but they're both needed.
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E131 - Rainn Wilson: Comedy, God & Why We Need a Spiritual Revolution
And I love that in your podcast book, so much of your work, you're really attempting to shed light on how it's important to align ourself with what matters most, because that's going to correlate to the most fulfillment in life. And so...
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E131 - Rainn Wilson: Comedy, God & Why We Need a Spiritual Revolution
Take it where you will, but in terms of what matters most to you currently right now or what you think is important to reflect on for most people to realize that matters most, what comes up for you?
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E131 - Rainn Wilson: Comedy, God & Why We Need a Spiritual Revolution
So well said. And it's important to examine also where internally we have this, right? It's easy to point the fingers at other people. And I've definitely had this come up for myself where there's this sort of new age narcissism in a way, you know? And there can be this spiritual- You just lost 8,000 subscribers. Take it easy, folks.
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E131 - Rainn Wilson: Comedy, God & Why We Need a Spiritual Revolution
But yeah, the spiritual materialism where it ends in the confines of what benefits you personally, physically, right? And so there is, of course, the yin and the yang, the inhale, the exhale, the Baha'i understanding of the integration and disintegration. And I've heard you speak to this as well, how in many ways,
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E131 - Rainn Wilson: Comedy, God & Why We Need a Spiritual Revolution
liberating ourselves is supporting the world and supporting the world looks like physically doing things and supporting other people in so many ways and so Taking now a 30,000 foot view, maybe go out to the blue marble photo and examine this human species where we currently find ourself at the developmental process. In many ways, we could be seen as like a pre-bubescent teen, right?
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E131 - Rainn Wilson: Comedy, God & Why We Need a Spiritual Revolution
We're struggling in many ways, but we're also growing in so many ways at rapid pace. The subtitle of your book is Why We Need a Spiritual Revolution, right? So why do we need a spiritual revolution, Rainn?
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E131 - Rainn Wilson: Comedy, God & Why We Need a Spiritual Revolution
Yeah, it's interesting how at that time you were struggling so much and yet while so many other people were struggling, that character, that show was like really solace. It was like a healing balm for so many people. And I know levity and comedy really does just give us some reprise and just like break from our own solipsism often, you know?
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E131 - Rainn Wilson: Comedy, God & Why We Need a Spiritual Revolution
Yeah, it's so easy when you're really so tuned in to social media and the news and what's going on out there to have to develop that cynicism, that nihilism, that's just, you know, it can get very scary. But there is a deeper intelligence that resides in our heart that knows there is a more beautiful world possible, as a good friend Charles Eisenstein wrote about.
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E131 - Rainn Wilson: Comedy, God & Why We Need a Spiritual Revolution
What do you think it is that really allows people to arrive back at the realization that not only can things get better, but they must if this world that we love, we want to see continue to flourish. I'm reminded of that story at 25 when
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E131 - Rainn Wilson: Comedy, God & Why We Need a Spiritual Revolution
another folk, I think his name, he played Andre, Dinner with Andre, told you about, or just reminded you about the power of hope and not to give in to cynicism, right? Because it can be so alluring.
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E131 - Rainn Wilson: Comedy, God & Why We Need a Spiritual Revolution
And so what do you think about comedy as a healing force?
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E131 - Rainn Wilson: Comedy, God & Why We Need a Spiritual Revolution
Quick share, one health tool that I have absolutely loved over the past few years is red light therapy. When I meditate in the morning, I usually do it in front of a red light panel, which by the way, red light has over 4,000 peer-reviewed studies, many of which show how it helps with cellular healing, skin health by stimulating collagen, testosterone, sleep, mood, and so many others.
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E131 - Rainn Wilson: Comedy, God & Why We Need a Spiritual Revolution
I personally can feel the benefits in real time, and I think it's a great way to get healthy light in the morning. especially when the sun isn't out yet or maybe in the winter months where there's less sunlight outside. So just 10 to 20 minutes each day is enough. Bond Charge is a great option for red light devices because they have the lowest EMF on the market.
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E131 - Rainn Wilson: Comedy, God & Why We Need a Spiritual Revolution
They can switch between both near infrared and red light in one device. There's no flicker and they're lightweight. They ship worldwide very quickly. They're easy with returns and exchanges and also have an array of other science-backed products that you can check out, which if you want to, just go to bondcharge.com slash knowthyself and use coupon code knowthyself to save 15%.
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E131 - Rainn Wilson: Comedy, God & Why We Need a Spiritual Revolution
That's B-O-N-C-H-A-R-G-E.com slash knowthyself and use code knowthyself to save 15%. Bond Charge products are all HSA FSA eligible, giving you tax-free savings of up to 40%. I hope you dig it. Back to the episode.
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E131 - Rainn Wilson: Comedy, God & Why We Need a Spiritual Revolution
An area which is a big theme in your book and your work is this rising group of, quote, spiritual but not religious folk who largely societally, as you've spoken to, we've thrown out the spiritual baby with the religious bathwater.
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E131 - Rainn Wilson: Comedy, God & Why We Need a Spiritual Revolution
And yet we all yearn for coming into wholeness and to realize our spiritual nature, whether you put esoteric beliefs on that or you attribute it to more of a feeling of compassion and love, which we all have the capacity for.
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E131 - Rainn Wilson: Comedy, God & Why We Need a Spiritual Revolution
we still yearn for that and yet there aren't as many systems or capacity for us in the newer generations to bring along those old the old baggage of dogmatic belief systems and so what do you see as a juxtaposition there between our deep need and yearning for spiritual truth and the falling away of outdated systems and religions well
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E131 - Rainn Wilson: Comedy, God & Why We Need a Spiritual Revolution
Which could you give for people that don't know what the Baha'i faith is, quick little.
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E131 - Rainn Wilson: Comedy, God & Why We Need a Spiritual Revolution
There is that resurgence, again, of, you know, a lot of people that listen to my podcast, your podcast, are finding this new home of spiritual truth and search and yearning for that essential, true, pure wisdom to, like, how to live and how to give and, you know, those old systems like we're speaking to because of who has contorted the systems throughout time don't resonate with so many.
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E131 - Rainn Wilson: Comedy, God & Why We Need a Spiritual Revolution
When you use the word spiritual and that like we are spiritual beings, I'm just curious how you define that and what you mean by that because it can mean many things to many people. How do you think of it?
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E131 - Rainn Wilson: Comedy, God & Why We Need a Spiritual Revolution
Oh, absolutely. How do you... Russell with beliefs really often act as a pacifier for our insecurity of not knowing. And when it comes to the idea of a soul or something that leaves beyond this body, what has led you to your certainty conviction? How do you delineate between what is a hopeful wishing because ceasing to exist is quite frightening for somebody that is currently existing.
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E131 - Rainn Wilson: Comedy, God & Why We Need a Spiritual Revolution
With the existential reality that we, you know, unless we have the direct experience of a soul outside of our mind and body, then it's tough to know with quite exactitude the reality of that.
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E131 - Rainn Wilson: Comedy, God & Why We Need a Spiritual Revolution
Like gratitude and fear, almost.
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E131 - Rainn Wilson: Comedy, God & Why We Need a Spiritual Revolution
earlier we referenced when talking about death and your young and spry 58 year old body that
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E131 - Rainn Wilson: Comedy, God & Why We Need a Spiritual Revolution
uh whatever 20 30 40 more years that you have i think a lot of us think in in the way we're like you know we're kind of guaranteed to like maybe 80 90 at least we hope right and of course the tough pill the reality is to swallow is we we don't know when actually how much how much longer we have and i think facing off with our own mortality
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E131 - Rainn Wilson: Comedy, God & Why We Need a Spiritual Revolution
through loved ones that are passing away, through a near encounter or a near death experience ourself, or just simply sitting and contemplating what that moment will be like, it brings many things up to examine right now in your immediate reality. There's like a presence that death brings, an amount of like liveliness in life that the presence of death brings.
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E131 - Rainn Wilson: Comedy, God & Why We Need a Spiritual Revolution
They're kind of, you know, in many ways like two sides of the same coin and so, I know that you love to talk about death and you've experienced it obviously with many people and your father. What do you think the power of contemplating our own mortality has?
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E131 - Rainn Wilson: Comedy, God & Why We Need a Spiritual Revolution
I have tried death meditation.
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E131 - Rainn Wilson: Comedy, God & Why We Need a Spiritual Revolution
Yeah, there's that, again, that immediacy of what it brings to the forefront of imagining we're on our deathbed and just envisioning that. What does that bring up in us in terms of what we felt like we haven't resolved in our life or what becomes most important in that moment of death, right?
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E131 - Rainn Wilson: Comedy, God & Why We Need a Spiritual Revolution
And again, like we were speaking to earlier, can we align our life in such a way that when we arrive at that moment, we can... embrace the other side joyfully, you know, and like kind of with a sense of abandonment and completion with this life, you know? Yeah. Do you feel like you've gotten closer to being able to be at that place?
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E131 - Rainn Wilson: Comedy, God & Why We Need a Spiritual Revolution
Hmm. Just it feels like an amazing amount of self-acceptance and acknowledgement. And I know there's, of course, many moments at both and probably both of our lives and many people that are listening that completely forget that and to acknowledge how far we've come and the impact that we've made and the good that we've done.
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E131 - Rainn Wilson: Comedy, God & Why We Need a Spiritual Revolution
But I think it's an important reminder to see where am I at on God's balance sheet? Where do I need to make some more deposits? Where do I need to make amends? Where have I not forgiven so I can be ready for death should it come in this moment? That's powerful.
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E131 - Rainn Wilson: Comedy, God & Why We Need a Spiritual Revolution
It's hard not to view him as a guy in the sky with a nice beard, sky daddy giving you a hug. If God is perfect understanding, we can't understand and judge something at the same time. And yet, so much suffering that's happening too, God must encompass all of that as well. I think of the purpose that pain and suffering play on the path of spiritual growth.
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E131 - Rainn Wilson: Comedy, God & Why We Need a Spiritual Revolution
What are your thoughts on the purpose that pain and suffering play on our own spiritual growth and evolution?
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E131 - Rainn Wilson: Comedy, God & Why We Need a Spiritual Revolution
Well said. I really like the understanding how suffering in many ways is like the price of admission for the illusion of separation.
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E131 - Rainn Wilson: Comedy, God & Why We Need a Spiritual Revolution
Like separation is, of course, an essential, like without...
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E131 - Rainn Wilson: Comedy, God & Why We Need a Spiritual Revolution
separation we don't have the experience of otherness so it's like the infinite consciousness needs to descend into its many different differentiations to go on a data collection process and to experience itself to become itself in so many ways then part of that process is forgetting that is our true nature and the bashing of our heads against the wall and the and the pain the suffering that is inevitable on the path to realizing who we are in our true nature
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E131 - Rainn Wilson: Comedy, God & Why We Need a Spiritual Revolution
When you have studied through the Baha'i, through all these Native American religions and a lot of different beautiful spirituality, how do you view this realm? And I've heard you speak to, again, these two forces at play that can be viewed through the views of many different spiritual wisdom traditions and religions.
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E131 - Rainn Wilson: Comedy, God & Why We Need a Spiritual Revolution
that there are these two forces at play constantly, collectively, and then also individually in our life. And I'm curious what you think about those two forces as it contributes to what makes up reality in many ways.
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E131 - Rainn Wilson: Comedy, God & Why We Need a Spiritual Revolution
I love that, man. It's so important. So many amazing reflections on the nature of who we are and the time that we face. I've really enjoyed this whole conversation. A question that's just coming to me now. Let's say we go to rain at 80. Reflecting back at you right now. Much like you would probably at your age currently reflect back at your time at 25, what would he be saying to you?
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E131 - Rainn Wilson: Comedy, God & Why We Need a Spiritual Revolution
What advice would he be saying to you? What do you think he would wish that you would give yourself some more credit for? I'm curious what you think future you hindsight looks like.
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E131 - Rainn Wilson: Comedy, God & Why We Need a Spiritual Revolution
What does your intuition say? What does the enlightened gestalt reign point you in the direction of?
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E131 - Rainn Wilson: Comedy, God & Why We Need a Spiritual Revolution
What happens when you take that insight look at it through the lens of that for your childhood, because I remember Robin Williams mentioning how comedy was kind of like a behavioral adaptation for making his mother who was sick feel better. And I'm curious about your thoughts between that link of the genuine, I guess,
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E131 - Rainn Wilson: Comedy, God & Why We Need a Spiritual Revolution
It's an important reflection and exercise for anybody that's listening. I think right now, you know, in yoga, they explain the four levels of the mind, chitta, which is like the deepest access that we have to the intelligence of life. And so in many ways, it's like we are accessing that deep intelligence when we go inwards
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E131 - Rainn Wilson: Comedy, God & Why We Need a Spiritual Revolution
Maybe for our own intellect, it's nice to personify it as yourself in the future that you're talking to. But it is interesting when we go inwards, you can find answers to things that intellectually were hard just a minute ago, but there's a deeper access that one can start to point into.
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E131 - Rainn Wilson: Comedy, God & Why We Need a Spiritual Revolution
And even just in that exercise, when I try to crack the nut a little bit more, there's a deeper acceptance of, yeah, it can be yes and. I feel called to serve and support and scale, and it's really helping people. And I can also sit in the woods and give that space for myself too. And so it's an interesting exercise for people to play with. That is. And you worked it right here in your studio.
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E131 - Rainn Wilson: Comedy, God & Why We Need a Spiritual Revolution
Last little thing that I'm curious about is your practices, what you've really found supportive for you on your own spiritual path and what that looks like in everyday embodiment and practice.
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E131 - Rainn Wilson: Comedy, God & Why We Need a Spiritual Revolution
whatever you want to call it, gif, pull, dharma towards comedy, and then also, like, the trauma as a child that leads to a behavioral compensation of making everybody laugh as a way to cope. I'm curious how you think about that economy.
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E131 - Rainn Wilson: Comedy, God & Why We Need a Spiritual Revolution
Thank you, man. That's a great practice reminder, all those things. And yeah, it's a really cool thing to build a community of shared values where people seek out this information and connect with you on the many different planes in which they have
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E131 - Rainn Wilson: Comedy, God & Why We Need a Spiritual Revolution
from deep insight and comedy and figuring out systems of the new paradigm you know all of it is just it's really cool and i appreciate to the degree you have not limited yourself because you've let a lot of your light shine through in ways where people who identified with previous like identities in a career or something maybe might have not let themselves go so it's it's really beautiful to see all the different ways in which you show up
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E131 - Rainn Wilson: Comedy, God & Why We Need a Spiritual Revolution
Yeah, dude. This has been amazing. I've really enjoyed this conversation. Me too.
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E131 - Rainn Wilson: Comedy, God & Why We Need a Spiritual Revolution
It's been great. You know, we'll link everything down for your podcast, Soul Boom, which is an amazing book. Everything that you got going on. And yeah, man, do you have any last words before we start to close out?
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E131 - Rainn Wilson: Comedy, God & Why We Need a Spiritual Revolution
Absolutely. Look at us doing it right now.
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E131 - Rainn Wilson: Comedy, God & Why We Need a Spiritual Revolution
Yeah. Sola sounds better. I think they both could use some work. We'll workshop that. Yeah, we'll get on that. We'll get back to you guys on that one. Dude, thank you so much, Rain. Everybody, appreciate you for coming on this journey.
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E131 - Rainn Wilson: Comedy, God & Why We Need a Spiritual Revolution
Yeah, until next time, be well. Take care.
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E131 - Rainn Wilson: Comedy, God & Why We Need a Spiritual Revolution
Dude, I told my sister that you were coming on the podcast. She, first off, had a complete panic attack. And then second, broke out into tears. And then she's showing up for a selfie. That's nuts. I love it. That's nuts. Does that feeling of having brought joy to so many people's lives, does that like stay with you? Do you have like a healthy amount of pride with that?
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E131 - Rainn Wilson: Comedy, God & Why We Need a Spiritual Revolution
do you think about your childhood led you to feeling like you needed to manufacture like you know interactions and not not being as natural in that aspect i'm curious
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E131 - Rainn Wilson: Comedy, God & Why We Need a Spiritual Revolution
You saw the chess board walking in. All right, we're gonna have to get it after this.
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E131 - Rainn Wilson: Comedy, God & Why We Need a Spiritual Revolution
Do you think back about that time much?
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E131 - Rainn Wilson: Comedy, God & Why We Need a Spiritual Revolution
So Around 25, you're getting into these. And if you had to kind of pinpoint down the spiritual awakening, I know that originally, early on, you had ties with the Baha'i faith and you kind of turned away from that and went rebellious and to explore your own hedonistic impulses and push that to the side. What was the moment you realized you needed some sort of spiritual life out of necessity? Yeah.
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E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
But because it's so fast, so rapid, we're not aware to the degree that it's actually not a full continuous light source. And similarly, within our experience of life, we have this experience of being a solid self moving through solid space and time. And as you deepen from anapana to vipassana, you're starting to really experience that illusoriness.
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E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
Yeah, 100%. So your pen name, Young Pueblo, which a lot of people know you under, that means young people, right? What was the kind of setup for that in terms of how you feel like where we are, where humanity is?
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E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
the observer right like even even with vipassana like you know some people say just you know be the observer but even the observer melts away it goes back to what you said in the beginning of deciding to live more gently like when you experience the impermanence of something that there will be a first and last time that we do anything in life yeah it changes radically how we approach all of our relationships our career our family and how we engage with them because
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E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
As much as I love this conversation and meeting you, who knows what's going to happen to either of us the next moment, you know? And that invites actually an immense presence and that brings so much more aliveness to life. On the path of deepening our awareness, I found, especially through studying through Dhamma and Vipassana,
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E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
learning how there's three types of actions that we can have, you know, from the physical, which were all obvious, you know, are obvious to us, to the vocal, to our mental, which is the most subtle and they put the most importance on because they're closest to the source of which where our impulses arise. I found that there's so much more importance on our mental, my mental volition.
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E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
Like I found that as a direct path to like, the doorway, the gateway into my subconscious and unconscious, but also like where so much transformation comes. And so what is mental volition and how you would explain it?
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E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
similar timeframe when I set my first 10 day and then six months later went and served my first one. And man, looking back, you really are able to connect the dots. How for me, and I'm sure for you, like that was such a big pivotal point of, of transformation.
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E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
And you can see the change in how it, you know, even if it puts you two degrees in a different direction in life, over the course of a decade, you're in a completely different zip code, you know? Yeah.
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E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
Yeah, I think somewhere in the Dhammapada, I believe the Buddha's reference is saying one minute of pure, proper awareness is worth more than a full lifetime of unawareness. Yeah. And that's quite a statement. Yeah. But it points to what you were speaking to about the color-tinted glasses that often we're living life through. In many ways, it's not actually an intimate experience with life.
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E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
It's just conditioning reacting to other conditioning that we're presented with in life.
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E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
I found the understanding of like how our mind works, you know, on the path to knowing ourself, if we want to actually know who we are and what life is, then it is delineating the path, the difference between what is us and what isn't us.
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E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
On that journey, like you said, it's really important to be mindful of what impressions we're accumulating because the conscious mind can always accept or reject. Say, I like this, I don't like this. But the subconscious mind is always recording. It only works through addition and multiplication. And so...
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E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
that's why especially i think since i first got introduced to like this path and various other meditative contemplative practices the importance of guarding what you are impressed upon you from the music you listen to to the movies you watch the people you hang around all of it is without your full awareness yeah
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E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
And even the things that you're not aware of, because our awareness can only be around, can only perceive consciously like a certain amount of bits of information. Yeah. Our subconscious, our body is picking up so much, like a sponge.
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E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
In the chorus, a big teaching is the four types of people that, you know, those that are going from darkness to darkness, those that are going from darkness to brightness, those that are going from brightness to darkness, and those that are going from brightness to brightness. And I think it's an important framework because it, it,
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E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
helps us reflect on which direction our life is going, if we're accumulating more unconscious impressions that are building towards a life of reaction, or if we're going towards more awareness. So I'm just curious if you'd like to reflect on a moment in your personal life where you went from darkness to darkness, to darkness to brightness, to now hopefully brightness to brightness.
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E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
Because I think, yeah, I just breathed some humanity into this as I know your journey in life has been... A wild journey, very full spectrum.
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E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
Yeah. So you've been writing so much, sharing so much content, writing a lot of books. Your fifth one's coming out now, How to Love Better, which was amazing.
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E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
It's such an important reflection where we find ourselves on the macro scale of humanity, but our own individual lives, learning how to love better. And for me, I feel like I've really devoted trying my best to become a presence of love in life. And redefining like what does that mean you know for me and i'm curious when i say that becoming a presence of love what comes to mind for you
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E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
Amazing, man. And at what point, I'm curious, did sharing your insights and your growth and when did that come into the picture?
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E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
Hey, fam. I hope that this episode with Diego is bringing you value and a sense of ease in your life. One thing that brings me joy in my life is my morning ritual. Having healthy habits in the morning that build a foundation for steady energy throughout the rest of the day to be our best self is a major key. And for me, every day I start with shrooms.
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E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
and not the psychedelic kind, but through a coffee alternative like the ones in Mudwater, where their blend contains adaptogenic mushrooms like lion's mane to support focus and chaga and reishi to support your immune system. For me, drinking something like cacao, which is in Mudwater instead of coffee, is a big win. I rarely go without it in the morning.
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E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
And if you don't know, Mud Water is 100% organic, non-GMO, gluten-free, sugar-free, and vegan. I absolutely love this company. My good buddy Shane is the founder, and so I know how much intention they put into their creations.
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E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
and they invest in mental wellness as well i'm stoked to be partnering with them for 2025. if you want to give them a try you can head to mudwater.com know thyself and grab a starter kit right now our community i know they self gets an exclusive deal which is up to 43 off your entire order plus a rechargeable frother which is free it comes in a little package like this
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E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
with cool little sayings over it. It's pretty affordable for the quality of the product that it is. Again, it's up to 43% off at mudwtr.com slash know thyself. I hope you enjoy. I'm curious, did you have any like egoic inflation in that period where I think there's the genuine urge to share insights that will be helpful to people?
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E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
Did you have any ego stuff that came up on your process of gaining millions of followers?
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E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
And I think to a degree it's inevitable, right? Like, I think it's, it's part of the path of like, we find our way and we find some insight and then we lose our way a little bit. And it's just like that balance of awareness and integration, um, because we can have huge insights or awareness into certain aspects of life.
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E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
And unless like we, we put that into practice and make that the new normal for us and integrate, then yeah, it can be tough.
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E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
Yeah, and again, the inevitability of life being a one giant mirror through all its different faces back to us of our own gifts, our own inadequacies, our pain, the love that we can share. And I'm looking forward to diving a little bit deeper into relationships. Also, a lot of the topics of exploration in your new book.
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E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
I think I'm just first off to start out like the mysteriousness of consciousness. Like we have this human experience that is 100% self-contained that just presents itself through the void of our face. Like, you know, I can't see you right now because I'm seeing through myself. And that's amazing because the world presents itself to us.
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E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
And yet it creates difficulties because we're so close to our own shit. Like we're literally looking through it as it oftentimes.
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E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
And that's, and, and so when I, when I think of relationships and them as mirrors through not just romantic connections, but through all different types of relationships, relationships through media, through friends and family, through the, you know, um, so, so many different aspects of it. It just, uh,
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E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
It makes me think about how this realm is set up and how mirrors and relationships serve a very important necessity in our awakening journey. Because otherwise there's so much stuff we can't see throughout unless we have a proper mirror of our internal self.
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E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
Through the experience of limitation.
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E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
And we can't understand and judge something at the same time, right?
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E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
Yeah. And then on the flip side, how much through the cultivation of awareness, our presence can be an active force of liberation for everyone we come into contact with.
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E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
What do you think are the qualities of that state when you tap into it? Like you just mentioned a couple of compassion and understanding. What other ones would you say are the most predominant?
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E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
I really like the appreciation of complexity because I think it's so easy and so simple to reduce people to objects and just like simple way of understanding them. Like it's actually a sign of... It's a sign of intelligence to be able to be in the face of something complex where there's many different dynamics and to not reduce people down.
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E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
There's innumerable paths and ways in which life reflects back to us and then the practices that we take up on the journey and just living life has its way of refining us to deeper levels of awareness or pain that will lead us to make that choice to deepen our awareness. I know you have deep familiarity with both.
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E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
Do you think that our capacity to give love to others is limited to the degree we can give it to ourselves in many ways?
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E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
Look at you appreciating the complexity.
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E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
What sparked your desire to write a book about love when it's quite a, you know, filled industry?
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E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
And we were just chatting beforehand how Dhamma and Vipassana has been a big part of both of our journeys. And you recently came back from a 45-day silent retreat.
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E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
Yeah, when you say that, it just brings to mind how often we drag our history and who we think somebody is and how they should show up based off of who they've been in the past in every single moment. And in that perspective, it's like we're not actually even engaging with somebody who, as they are in the moment, we're engaging with how we want them to be, how we expect them to be.
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E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
And that like just sucks intimacy out of the equation.
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E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
That's not a good way to live. Yeah. And it's why I'm so glad we started this whole conversation talking about the developing of awareness because to the degree that we do that is to the degree we can actually be present with somebody and not just our projections of them.
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E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
Yeah, I love that section in your book when you reflect on arguments, because it's something that I've thought of many times as well, where often we're under the presumption whenever arguments arise in particularly the romantic relationships, but also any conversation where we have differing opinions, we feel like it's me versus you, and we're trying to win instead of trying to understand.
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E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
And shifting that perspective, instead of me versus you, it's us versus the problem.
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E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
The guest we had on last week, Peter Krohn, he has a saying that being right is the poor man's version of self-worth. Oh man, that's a good one. Yeah. And it really does feel like oftentimes... Like, we're not trying to get to the objective truth of something. We're trying to just be right in our perspective.
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E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
And again, it's one of those things that's very difficult to catch in the throes of unawareness by default. You're not aware to the function and the degree which this is happening, right? But again, in the process of growing our awareness, we can see and like,
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E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
just question, question it a little bit more, you know, and just create a little bit of a crack of awareness and inquisitiveness and curiosity when we're faced, you know, with these difficult situations.
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E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
For people that aren't familiar with what Vipassana is, I'd love for you to share just what that consists of. Because quite frankly, sitting, for better or worse, you're essentially alone for 45 days meditating on average 7 to 10 hours a day. And that sounds pretty... Intense.
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E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
And we can only communicate to the degree we're aware of what our needs are and what our values are. Right. So we have to like actually know what we need in order to be able to communicate it with another, which is the process of, you know, communication, which we're speaking to real communication versus communication. communication out of projections and tension.
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E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
I have a couple of people in my life who have been in a long-term relationship, like 20, 30, 40 years plus, and it's so different than the challenges that come up in the first five years of a relationship. I'm just curious what you think about the saying that love isn't enough and that you need to like learn how to communicate.
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E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
And I'm curious what you think the other aspects are that we need to really cultivate as skills within building a long term relationship.
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E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
Treating each other as best friends and roommates and all of the other things that partners are to each other. I think it can be... Like relationships can often default to the place where it becomes a comfort zone out of coping, not being able to be comfortable alone. And that can be a dangerous pitfall as well because...
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E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
We can only, I suppose, choose something to the degree in which we're free and we bring a sense of willingness to it instead of it's our default and just our safety and our comfort zone, which is amazing. Not saying anyone's wrong for wanting some comfort or safety, but how do you feel like our capacity to be good alone is a barometer for how much we've healed?
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E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
I want to read this quote that I saw in your book that I really loved. Um, There is an intrinsic and undeniable connection between the relationship you have with your own emotions and how well you will be able to show up for the emotions of those you love. If you run from your own tension, you will lack the experience to show up for the tension of others.
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E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
And I think it just really invites this perspective of what it means to hold space for others to the degree we can for ourselves.
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E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
Have you found the skills you need to make it, let's say year five through 10 in relationship are different than the first five?
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E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
Man, it really is cool to think about how long term relationships were very much so being witness to each other's lives.
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E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
It's so cool.
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E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
Yeah, it's exciting. And I do think that it's... Each generation is faced with problems and challenges unique to that generation. And I think because of social media and the ability to compare yourself, you know, at the ready to any relationship or couple goals that are out there.
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E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
What would you say to a generation that has this perfection orientation towards relationships and people and the grass is greener? And, you know, I feel like that perspective robs us of the joy and beauty that comes from the longevity of something.
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E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
It takes two big people to...
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E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
courageously uh love and love for my space of freedom where you're holding somebody not with a tight grip but with a loose palm and to know that whatever happens in the next week month year that if you guys decided to part ways that the love that you share never goes anywhere and to continually choose each other you know and and i think it's important to reflect on that
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E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
So what's really unique about Vipassana and its path is really a scientific approach to the awakening and purification process of our spiritual journey. And an aspect, which is, you could say, largely it's helping us cultivate is paññā, which is wisdom, right? Yeah. And I love how they sort of break it down into the three different types of wisdom.
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E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
Like it's a fundamental orientation to perceive a container of a relationship as a catalyst for your own soul's evolution and to be in service for that for the other person too. And I think when people, when two individuals surrender to that, it is a completely different dynamic because both people are willing to change and they're willing to grow. Yeah.
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E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
That's difficult, and the growth of the container will be limited if one person's not that, if they're not there in their journey.
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E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
Yeah, it's like deepening intimacy and growth through the depth of one connection versus meandering and exploring for different unique novelty and different connections. And, you know, it's, I mean... Chasing excitement.
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E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
Anything you want to share on the overlap between our own personal awakening journey, which we've opened up with and becoming that presence of love for other relationships, not even just romantically, but like, you know, our life is filled with relationships.
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E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
You know, there's the wisdom acquired through external means where you hear somebody or maybe an Instagram quote that could lead to the second type, which is like an intellectual understanding. And then the third would be the experiential knowing, right? Where it's the wisdom that actually lives in you as you through you. And as somebody who's been such a advocate and, um,
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E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
Yeah, it feels like the more we grow our awareness, the more we perceive the opportunities and the bountiful opportunities we have in our life to be even just a small agent of benevolence and change for the people that we come in contact with. And you start to pick up on things and there's a refinement of your intuition.
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E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
I think I was having a conversation, maybe it was like, I don't know, a year ago, I was on a hike with a friend. He's owner, founder of this really big company, but is like, was facing some good amount of difficulty in his life and like finding resistance. And I could see and just like, you know, could see the nature of his mind is so brilliant, moves so fast. And I asked him,
Know Thyself
E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
do you ever consider how your inability or lack of willingness to slow down is affecting your ability to speed up? And, you know, it was a big moment for him, you know, because I think so many of us perceive things that we want, whether it's through comparison or maybe they're just genuine things we feel are for us. And yet we want them in that DoorDash Uber mentality, right?
Know Thyself
E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
And we don't want to put in the work. And so I feel like so many things become revealed to us in the process of slowing down and being able to pay attention to how life works. And a big one of that is refining our capacity to listen to that inner voice and that intuition. And I'm curious what your thoughts are about intuition and the listening to it.
Know Thyself
E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
leader and teacher and sharer of thoughts throughout the past decade online, especially. I'm curious what you think about the difference between those levels of knowing and wisdom and how it's important to deepen our sense of wisdom.
Know Thyself
E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
I think... What I've truly tried to strive for most in my life is the ability to see clearly and experience life as it is. And you can't do that when you're in a state of survival. And I look at the biggest decisions I've made in my life when I look back and connect the dots that have led me to the most impact and growth
Know Thyself
E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
They were those subtle voices that I listened to, you know, that were like the wave on the beach shore, you know, thankfully. And they can show up as screams when you don't listen to them for so long. But the refinement of our ability to listen to our inner voice, there is this freedom and realizing that we're not in control of our life. No one is.
Know Thyself
E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
And there are forces within us that we can pay attention to where life's intelligence, I feel like, is moving us in a direction. And the more that we listen and surrender to that voice, I feel strongly that the more our life is going to play out in a way that is of most benefit to most people and ourselves. What do you think about surrendering to that voice and intelligence?
Know Thyself
E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
pointing towards one intelligence i don't know maybe a collective one but i think that's also impermanent yeah i think there's something inherently intelligent about the design from the fibonacci and golden spiral sequences that you know go that are prevalent throughout all of nature's design to you know the ratios of our body and how it's comprised i'm curious what you think as you because i know especially in vipassana and the practice of
Know Thyself
E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
like observing life as it is and not through our own projections and belief. We're both in sort of a spiritual space, you know, and I get offers every day from people that want to channel intergalactic councils and angels and, you know, all sorts of things. Yeah. Oh man, I love that. You know, like I get, and it's great.
Know Thyself
E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
Like, you know, I don't want to deny, I don't deny or accept anything upon, you know, it being presented. But I do feel like there can be, especially in these spaces, people are quick to believe things, not just in the conspiratorial rabbit holes, you know, but about what life is and what's out there.
Know Thyself
E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
And I think there's something freeing about just admitting that we don't know what's outside of our direct experience.
Know Thyself
E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
Yeah. And it is that balance, right? Because... it comes back to like living where I am open to the spontaneous synchronicity and coincidence that presents itself and you know if somebody wants to you know send me a message and I happen to read it about my how my Libra is in north my north node is in Libra or whatever like ultimately I'm in a similar position with you.
Know Thyself
E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
And like, if anything is genuinely providing value and insight to where you're living better with greater awareness and compassion and it comes in whatever form, then great. Like, cool.
Know Thyself
E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
Yeah. And it's great that there are just as many people that are paths, you know, and so many different ways up the mountain. And thank God we're not all on the same trail because it'd be very crowded. But also- we'd have the same view. And it's cool to be able to have the different views.
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E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
And we were just talking beforehand a little bit of some of the different paths and they all have their unique value in different ways. And I find for sure the scientific approach with Vipassana and Dhamma is really important. And how applicable it is to our immediacy of experience and the deepening of our awareness of whatever's happening.
Know Thyself
E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
Like the teaching is to be observed where there's an abnormality in the breath and a biochemical sensation somewhere in the body that's attached to every sensation that's happening, right? And so the fundamental craving we have for a pleasant experience of life drives us to do so many things and it goes so subtle, right? Like it gets deeper and deeper and more subtle in its refinement.
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E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
There is both, again, the paradox of experiencing the no self, right? And seeing how there is no solid Diego or Andre, right? And yet there's still a unique perspective that life has through your eyes that comes out in the words you write and speak. And I think...
Know Thyself
E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
we clarify that voice and perspective the more that uh we move through that conditioning and it's like you're just getting a more clear representation on reality and then it comes through based off your own history and like the way that you like to speak within the confines of the english language and right you know it's it's it's exciting um to see
Know Thyself
E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
Yeah. The real transformation comes through experience, right? And I've had similar experiences where it's complete void of any thoughts or like, you know, because you'll meditate for hundreds of hours and maybe not yet have the experience where you're completely still, where there's like zero, absolute zero thoughts for a prolonged period of time. And there is something... it's very trippy.
Know Thyself
E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
It's like you're the complete dissolution of any experience. And yet you come back to an experience of being somebody, you know, after some amount of time, it's so freeing. And then you, on the other hand, can have those extremely blissful, explosive, you know, I'm a being of light experience where every particle in your body is humming at the frequency of love.
Know Thyself
E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Of suffering and... Mm-hmm. The stories of other people's experiences can be a really interesting reference point of like, these things are possible. And then once you go and experience and taste something, that plants the seed of true transformation, I feel like, in somebody's life. Because we've heard so many, I mean...
Know Thyself
E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
whoever's listening, I know I've heard a lot of wild mystical stories and it's great. They're great, great reading material, you know, and it's, it's interesting.
Know Thyself
E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
Yeah, you can have an incredible experience. And if you don't have the capacity for the communication of the inner realm, then it's tough to transmit that, you know. But then there are those teachers that have this way with words and this ability, you know, and it's so special.
Know Thyself
E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
Yeah, very much so breaking the barrier between our conscious and subconscious mind. Exactly, yeah. Because you speak and write so much about healing and the journey of awakening. And...
Know Thyself
E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
Well, thanks for sharing your relative degree of awareness and enlightenment with us on the podcast today. I mean, again, dude, when we first connected, I was also similarly just excited to build a friendship. And, you know, the Buddhist term is slipping in my mind. That's like a spiritual friend.
Know Thyself
E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
But, you know, I think it's really important to cultivate those connections and relationships together. that really help us, you know, reinforce our own path. And yeah, this community as well that's building and is interested in these kinds of conversations, just so cool to feel. We'll link down below where people can find How to Love Better and check out
Know Thyself
E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
Diego and Young Pueblo as his pen name throughout Instagram and social media platforms. Do you have any other last words before we head out?
Know Thyself
E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
It is that process of bringing what was once unconscious, these patterns and habits of our mind that control us without our full conscious awareness, to actually experiencing and seeing and facing off with the difficulties and pain of whatever is undealt with, that don't even necessarily have to have stories attached to them, right?
Know Thyself
E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
My greatest joy. Thank you so much, my friend. Everybody, thanks for tuning into this episode. Until next time, be well.
Know Thyself
E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
I'd love to hear you break down in your words the process of becoming aware of those more subtle sensations. For people that don't know Vipassana, where you first start with the observation of your breath and then you're moving into the deeper awareness of the vibrations within your body. If you could share a little bit about that and then we can dive deeper into it.
Know Thyself
E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
It's been really cool to see your content online. I feel like we always have these, you know, these parasocial relationships with people's content, their message.
Know Thyself
E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
It's so fascinating because I think when it comes to wanting to grow in our life, a lot of people are familiar with physical change and seeing somebody go to the gym and get shredded and they have six pack abs or something. You can see the physicalness of it and the externalization of growth. But why mental health is largely also such a big epidemic is because it's invisible.
Know Thyself
E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
We can't see into the aspects of each other's minds outside of the actions that come out and stem from them. But it's much more difficult to have a reference point for what it can feel like to be a liberated being where you're not so closely identified with this voice in our head that runs our life, that won't leave us the heck alone.
Know Thyself
E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
And it really is an amazing challenge for anybody who's listening who hasn't already. Just try to observe your breath continuously without broken attention for every inhale and exhale and see how long you can last, you know, because it is shockingly difficult. The habit of the mind just jumps right back in.
Know Thyself
E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
And you hope that they live up in person to the energy that you see online. And pleasantly reassured that was the case.
Know Thyself
E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
Yeah, it's the experiential knowing that we were speaking to before when you feel yourself as a being of flowing continuous vibrations and not this solid I, this solid locus of thoughts and emotions kind of somewhere crouched around here that's like, you know, kind of in a survival energy towards the external world. It takes it from knowledge to truly wisdom because you're living that experience.
Know Thyself
E135 - Yung Pueblo: Reflections on Awakening & Becoming a Presence of Love
And, you know, I'd like to get your perspective on impermanence because it's such an important thing for us to, one, understand intellectually and then also deepen our experience of because life has this illusion of continuity. Like, for example, a lot of these lights that are around us are actually flickering maybe hundreds of times per second.
Know Thyself
E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
But for good reason. You obviously won, dear friend. And you happen to have cultivated quite an amazing perspective, understanding, and life. And there's a lot of ripe things that I'm excited to bring up with you in today's conversation. I feel like in my own personal evolution, the evolution of the show, and also the world.
Know Thyself
E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
It's a gift to be able to see you work. And also, you came and worked with my men's group one night. Yeah, it was fun. What's fascinating is when you see the process of you working with somebody, it becomes quite obvious to everybody except the person who's being worked on. Because the nature of our blind spot is like,
Know Thyself
E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
we can't see it we're operating through the lens of it and so we can't see ourselves because we're looking through it yeah i'm excited to unpack that a little bit but when you look at the possible perspectives that that you boil down that are prisons of our own making yeah what would you say are the are some of the most common ones um if you look at it from you know pattern perspective
Know Thyself
E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
For just kind of definition sake, I would love actually for you to just define what you feel the subconscious mind is, because what's so fascinating to me is on the pursuit of discovering true freedom in our life, there are so many things beyond our current awareness that are holding us back from accessing our natural state of being, which we both feel is freedom.
Know Thyself
E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
Yeah, where growth is perceived in the acquisition of more as opposed to addition by subtraction and actually the removal of things.
Know Thyself
E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
It downloads pretty heavy, and I want to kind of zoom in and slow down on this aspect because it's really important we hit this. Yeah.
Know Thyself
E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
You know, because, so there's the saying, you know, best time to plant a tree is a hundred years ago. The best time is today. It would have been nice if we were raised in an environment that was loving from the get-go where we didn't develop these behavioral compensations.
Know Thyself
E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
And yet now we have a lot of evidence and the accumulation and momentum for believing our own sense of inadequacy, for example, to present day. And the best time to realize it's illusory is right now, whoever's listening to this.
Know Thyself
E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
A couple of things I want to dive into here. First, do you perceive like from meta systemic thinking, are there patterns within a hierarchy of patterns? For example, we're speaking English within Los Angeles, which is within the context of America, which is in the context of China. the Milky Way galaxy, for example, like there are nodes within nodes. Yeah, for sure.
Know Thyself
E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
Are there patterns, limiting beliefs, subconscious patterns that exist within each other where you see kind of the ultimate one being the illusory of the self, I'm assuming. But like, how do you kind of see how they are nested within each other, so to speak?
Know Thyself
E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
but it helps to get context for what the subconscious mind is and the patterns that are kind of outside of our realm of awareness. So what is that in your perspective?
Know Thyself
E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
that's freedom yeah that level of of accepting and admitting that is um an admission to taking immense and complete responsibility for your life yes and as you've said before we can't be held responsible to that which we're oblivious to correct yeah and so a lot of times like these perspectives even though we can say like these are perspectives that i have that i hold
Know Thyself
E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
But again, we're looking through them as them. And so it is the blind spot that we're looking through. And from that point, self-improvement is a project of the divided self. It is like a dog chasing its own tail, failing to recognize that we are the source of that which we seek, like you're referring to.
Know Thyself
E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
For people that want to bring this from the philosophical and existential down to their own immediate life, what is a question that they can ask themselves to invite some awareness? Because you're talking about the process of awareness and integration. You have the insight. You live it.
Know Thyself
E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
What is a question we can ask ourselves to become aware of what is our predominant limiting belief holding us back without our awareness right now?
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E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
The nature of insight is like once we see something clearly, it becomes like an aha. Like, of course, like that's how it is. And there can be a self-righteousness that's attached to it. To sidebar that, because that's another conversation we're going to dive into. When we're oblivious to it, And we're in the moment where it is a blind spot.
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E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
Can you take us into an example of your life where you were living and in limitation that you weren't aware to, and then you had the insight of? Because from the perspective where you understand it, it seems so clear.
Know Thyself
E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
and when you're not in it it seems completely unclear yeah totally um and i think yeah it just breathes in some humanity because i know you've had so many examples within your own life where it's been this you know hide and seek of yourself so absolutely yeah no i mean i feel i'm at the bow of the boat of this whole process which allows me
Know Thyself
E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
To ensure that I don't lose you, which I believe that's my inevitability in a way.
Know Thyself
E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
Those moments where you see the interconnection of life is such a trip and a reminder of these chords that we really do create with people and how the energies we hold and beliefs are, you know, when they're collapsed immediately in real time, you get that call. Like, that's just proof right there of the energy collapsing, but then also how it's connected with other people. Yeah.
Know Thyself
E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
We'll get right back to the episode, but first a quick share from a brand that I love and use all of the time. I'm talking about Bond Charge Red Light Therapy, which by the way, has over 4,000 peer reviewed studies, many of which show how it helps with cellular healing, skin health by stimulating collagen, testosterone, sleep, mood, and so many other things.
Know Thyself
E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
I personally can feel the benefits in real time, and I think it's a great way to get healthy light in the morning, especially during the colder months or where there's less sun outside. Just 10 to 20 minutes a day is enough. And yeah, Bond Charge is a great option for red light devices because they had the lowest EMF on the market.
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E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
They can switch between both near infrared and red light in one device. There's no flicker and they're lightweight. They ship worldwide very quickly and they're easy with returns and exchanges and also have an array of other science-backed products to check out. I think you'll love it.
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E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
So let's reverse engineer it a little bit, going back to the root. Because again, there is a large rhetoric, especially in the personal development space, To focus solely on the behaviors and the discipline and the willpower. Yeah. And we can see that no matter how much praying or effort, if you plant, let's say, a mango tree seed,
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E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
If you want to try them out, you can go to boncharge.com slash know thyself and use coupon code know thyself to save 15%. That's B-O-N-C-H-A-R-G-E.com slash know thyself and use code know thyself to save 15%. Boncharge products are all HSA, FSA eligible, giving you tax-free savings of up to 40%. I hope you dig it. Back to the episode. I think this is a big theme. Thank you for sharing.
Know Thyself
E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
You've shared with me that story in the past. And to me, it's such an important reminder of what... is love and the mirrors that relationships serve in our life and how we're constantly bringing in our past history with us into every dynamic.
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E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
And actually, painfully, the realization is that we're relating to people through our own perspective of them and who we want them to be and not actually them. Now, looking back on that, what does that reveal to you about what it means to actually relate to people from a true place of love without attachment of who we need them to be for us?
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E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
You know, there's no way you're going to turn that into an avocado tree, you know, or there's no amount of willpower that will change what the confines of, you know, the genome that's in that seed to change it into something else. And so likewise, I feel like at the root, there are these beliefs and identity structures that then cascade down.
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E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
Yeah, I remember actually calling you up in my last relationship because I had one of these examples where I was seeing her through the, you could even say in a good way, the potential of who she could be or behaviors that I know that would benefit her and loving the version of her that would uphold that and being disappointed when she would fall short of that.
Know Thyself
E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
failing to recognize that I'm literally not relating with her in that way, you know? And it's a painful thing to realize in the moment. But again, the... to the degree there's a shadow, holds the other side of the light too. So the freedom that's experienced and the true love and depth of intimacy that it reveals on the other side of that is an amazing gift.
Know Thyself
E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
So it's painful to go through in the moment. It's the hell through that we get to heaven, like you said.
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E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
And so reverse engineering backwards from the results to the actions, the thoughts, the feelings, and the beliefs and the identity, when you take it down to the root of what something is, do you feel in the subconscious realm, like you said, that's kind of one level beneath our level of conscious awareness, are the identity and beliefs?
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E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
And there's something inherently like a candle in a dark room that illuminates wherever it goes. A presence of love. Somebody who has realized themselves as that nature, where they become an invitation for everybody around them to feel seen, heard, and held. And I just find it so amazing that in the embodiment of that, you become a walking invitation to that energy.
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E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
And it's wild what unravels in front of that presence that is you. Because you are that safe space for people to know that you genuinely are there for somebody and you're actually there connecting with them and not through your own prism.
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E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
There's even a deeper illusion, which is that it's ours to grant somebody that allowance, right? Absolutely.
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E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
Yeah, there's that saying, you know, one mouth, two ears, use them proportionately.
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E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
And I think cultivating you being a presence who like truly listens is the most invaluable thing we can do in life, you know, and both for ourself and others, because to the degree we're also truly listening to others when we're in the presence of them, we can be a catalyst for their change. But also we can become more aware of the subtleties within our own psyche.
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E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
And that's where we, I think in the first podcast we talked about how life gives us these reflections and mirrors. They first start out as whispers.
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E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
within our own narrative and talk, you know, that we have within our own, the conversation in our head to where we see then maybe a more gross or dense example of somebody in a relationship in our life to the metaphorical cosmic two by four that smacks us in the face to wake up, you know, it's the scream of living out of alignment.
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E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
So anything you want to reflect on there about the power of listening?
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E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
And I'm sorry that you heard me say that.
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E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
Glennon Doyle has that quote that paraphrasing says, we are alive to the degree in which we are willing to be annihilated.
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E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
Which goes hand in hand with that, you know, and when we go back to like how beautiful this life is and what a gift it means and what it really means to be human, which is to move beyond the limitations that nature has set upon, you know, all other life, you know, an animal and plant life where we can go beyond our limitation of just survival.
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E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
And yet when we're in the energy of reactivity and reaction from these beliefs and perspectives, we are literally not living our life in a way, which is painful to see, but then again, is also how this realm is sort of set up, you know?
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E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
Zooming in on how these things come up, again, without our awareness, We just perceive that it is ego-threatening and we react to it. The fundamental thing is that our intellect defends our identity. And so we are neurologically wired in a way to reinforce what we believe to be true, to reinforce that sense of self-righteousness.
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E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
And this is where I found in my own personal journey in the past when I look at... An expanded awareness or insight into something. I've heard you share as well, there's none so self-righteous as the newly converted. And it's so true, man. It goes from the densest, obvious religious examples to our own perspective in this conversation where we see an insight about ourself.
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E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
And it's an interesting dynamic because we can have this expanded awareness and then the ego insidiously uses it to reinforce itself.
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E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
But now I think it's important because a lot of people are identified with that terminology too. Seeker or searcher. And so there is a component of...
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E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
conclusions are like a death unto themself.
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E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
Yeah. I'll send you an invoice for realizing that I don't know, neither do you.
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E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
What is it about the ego that fears to be wrong, fundamentally? Its own death. Something that is illusory to begin with is afraid of its own death.
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E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
For example, somebody who does fundamentally believe they're undesirable, their actions are going to be commensurate with proving that in ways that we're not fully aware to, right?
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E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
With people that deal with addiction, I find that for people that have gone through recovery and maybe are 10, 20, 30 years down the road, I have wondered, often they still use the verbiage of like, I'm an addict.
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E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
And I'm curious, like the last gate seems to be like letting go of the story completely that I am an addict even. And like there is this... And I understand it's a delicate situation and thing to balance, you know, because there is this maybe fear of temptation around substance or, you know, you want to guard your behaviors or something.
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E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
But I just wonder how much energy we use, like literally physiologically to uphold these false assumptions about ourself and how much free energy, like how much energy gets freed up and the dissolution of that.
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E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
Yeah, it's so amazing when you get beyond the story of yourself that have been passed down quite literally, possibly for many people, for generations and generations and generations. And you discover the unique creative pulse that lives within you that is like that one of the eight billion faces on the diamond.
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E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
And then it's beautiful because you then get to be a true representation of your unique perspective in life. And however that shows up, you know, and if you're an artist, that means that your music is going to be not recreatable because it's unique to what wants to come through you. You describe this energy when you work with people in your mastermind and they feel physiologically lighter.
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E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
It reminded me of this section of this book I read. I don't know if you've heard On Having No Head by Harding. But it's great. It's a book on non-duality, pretty thin. He describes in the recognition of one's true nature some things that cascade. And I just want to kind of riff off. I'll just list these off and see how it resonates. So a complex of interrelated things.
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E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
psychophysical changes, including whole body alertness in place of the heady intermittent sort, a reduction of stress, particularly in the region of the eyes and mouth and neck as if one were at last letting them go, a progressive lowering of one's center of gravity as if losing one's head were finding one's heart and guts and feet, which are now rooted in the earth, a striking downward shift of one's breathing as if it were a belly function,
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E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
In fact, a general come down as if all the good things one had vainly strained after in the heights were awaiting one in the depths.
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E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
And balancing this descent, a general uplift, including a sense of exaltation, an upsurge of creativity, a new childlike spontaneity and playfulness, above all, a lightness, and finally, perhaps a calming of fears, a marked reduction of greed and anger, a smoothing out of personal relations, more capacity for selfless love, more joy. Amen. So these are like the fruits of the recognition.
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E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
It's so well said, man. So well articulated. And I really... It's so interesting that paradox of striving for something that can only be recognized in the absence of striving. Yeah. Like we can never become free. We can only be free. Exactly. We can never become happy. We can only be happy.
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E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
It is an interesting paradox because... Even like for those that want to take up the practice of meditation has beautiful benefits. And yet to take up a practice that you are saying is going to one day lead to freedom is almost reinforcing the shackles and chains of you not being and recognizing that state in the current present tense. Yeah.
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E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
This is great. And you brought up something that I'm actually, where I wanted to go next and actually ask you for like my own personal process. I think you and I, we've always felt this like simpatico and like...
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E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
similarity of certain dynamics i think on our path and our journey both what we love what we find you know what we're passionate to um and then also i see on the on the shadow side and some like previous limitations you've had that i that i see myself so cool if i ask yeah thanks here and to podcast four yeah To be continued. No, of course. I'd love to hear it.
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E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
So, you know, as you were mentioning, the ego in insidious ways loves to reinforce itself.
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E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
And I think, and hopefully this serves everybody who's tuning in, me sharing a little bit more of my own personal journey and I guess process as... one grows.
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E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
And as I've grown on my own journey, starting out with, you know, more personal development, kind of focused energy, you know, and self-improvement type energy to like 19, 20 years old, getting introduced to like meditation and more spiritual, you know, ideas and concepts that has, you know, opened my eyes up to so much and up to launching this podcast, you know, and the genuine seed of wanting to support liberation and on the planet.
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E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
I've just noticed, and as I've cultivated my own ability to listen, like my own inner narrative or where there's a desire to change up any behaviors around this, what you could just, I would say, categorize maybe for people as like a spiritual ego. And I think this is a really big theme right now. And I see it more and more the more that I have awareness of it in myself.
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E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
And I would say I had this conversation with this guy, Daniel Schmachtenberger, who's a friend. I would love to introduce you to him. Just an incredible human being. But probably like about a year ago. And it was like a deep three-hour late-night conversation that just like super awe-inspiring. And I left...
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E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
with this deepening of wanting to serve from the heart and noticing the part of myself that has gotten caught up in the identification with being spiritual. And I had this sort of, and you're my friend, so you know me and you can see patterns in different things. So I'm curious to see what you pick up as I continue speaking here.
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E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
I had kind of an experience, which I can share now or maybe at a later date in Brazil with my men's group, like maybe six months ago, where I had like a deepening of this like shedding and releasing of... I kind of felt like I'm tired of being spiritual. And really what it is, is I'm tired of spending energy upholding a persona that desires to be perceived as spiritual. Exactly.
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E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
Much more accurate. And it's fascinating because, of course, there's the genuine urge to serve people. And I recognize myself as a spiritual being. And I was just noticing more and more the parts of myself that would... desire to be seen spiritual, attractive, bright, light, you know? Yeah. And how that would
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E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
show up maybe in the choice of wardrobe or like the many different behaviors that it would show up as, you know? Yeah, yeah. And it's, you know, it's a subtlety, but to me, it felt like there is trapped energy there and more freedom to be had. Yeah, for sure. And so, happy to work with you on my own internal process of this, but then, you know, it also leads into this larger process of,
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E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
spirituality, as it's discovered for many people and deepened through podcasts and YouTube, there can very quickly become this identification with being spiritual. And if truly being spiritual is something to be approximating, not having an obnoxious ego, it's interesting how the ego uses that as well as another means to seem superior, attractive to other egos.
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E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
Yeah, for you. I mean, my truth is that everyone's equal, you know, but if I was to... Okay, so that's, and again, this is where you get stuck a little bit, right?
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E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
Yeah, yeah, the part of me that... You know, like the guru, the enlightened being that wears robes. Ramana Maharshi, Srinagarata. Has stories of awakening and has sat for 12 days without moving and all that.
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E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
It's so stupid. Yeah, the titles we give ourselves, the hitman for the ego, that sounds really good to the ego.
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E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
Is like in that real accepting of humanity, which I think I've definitely, you know, struggled with.
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E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
It's exhausting to sustain it. That's what I was kind of hinting at earlier.
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E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
That's how it makes sense to verbalize it now because... I look back at even, you know, because right now we're kind of going through a bit of a rebrand with Know Thyself. And it's just more of a refinement with the podcast art, the branding website and different things that's in alignment with this new energy that I'm kind of, you know, discovering within myself.
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E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
We'll go live kind of towards the end of next month in March. Yeah. But a big reason for that was this kind of experience I had in Brazil. I was like, just had this conversation with God and like alone in a chapel. Yeah. Yeah. starting to take off my jewelry and the things that I identify myself with. We're making more space for the humanity and the part that is...
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E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
That is natural to want to be liked and to be seen in a good standard and in the deeper accepting of my own humanity and be like, it's okay, like, the messy parts of myself. It's okay, like, to not be seen, like, to let go of needing to be seen a certain way. And I really had a deepening of, like, the experiential, like, feeling in my body.
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E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
Like, a lot of those qualities we mentioned earlier, like— it's almost like it's coming off your own trip or a hallucination in a sense. After that, I was like, I could see, for example, the podcast art I created at the start, which has got some sacred geometry in the background and gold glowing lights. And I could see parts of myself in which I wasn't aware of at the time.
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E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
Creating that is almost a projection of who I'd like to see myself as or other people to see me as.
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E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
yeah and now it's like i i and i'm sure there's layers still to go but i really don't i don't i don't have the desire to be seen as spiritual now like you know it just is a lot more spacious no absolutely that's what that's the word that came to mind is it's just it's much more real right and i think you know what came to mind as you're talking is one
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E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
Totally. And that was on the other side of that experience. Like immediately I had a lot of gratitude for young Andre, whatever coping mechanisms or like strategies or, or identities, you know, um, that, um, were useful in building the life that I have now, which is amazing. And I'm grateful for it. And it's like, yeah, and it just gets to be kind of let go or just like, let it be.
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E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
And it's, I think it's a subtle repatterning. You know, there's like, I, in my experience, have a bigger insight or awareness or expanded of how things are happening. And then it's like the continual integrative process of repatterning anytime little subtleties show up.
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E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
Yeah, for sure.
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E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
it's felt good just creating more and more space for that.
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E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
And I find myself being more pulled from that state. Now these days, like earlier on, meditation was more disciplined, almost militant in my approach to it, which is great for the benefits or whatever, but still creating that mental prison that you're living within. And now it's like,
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E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
going to meditate because that's you know generally being pulled and called you know and devotion versus discipline and really heart instead of the mind as much and yeah palpable shift and it's a commitment out of
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E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
Yeah. Yeah, no. And I mean, I, out of like all my friends, I'm probably honestly like the most adventurous and silly and rascal. Like whenever we like go on travels or whatever, I'm always like, Climbing the dangerous rocks and doing these things and like that for sure is a big part of me.
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E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
And, you know, I think previously for sure more in the past, like maybe I would guard that side and all of its aspects being perceived, you know? And so it's been a good process and thanks for chatting with me about it.
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E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
Especially, as I'm sure you've experienced more and more life as it is, you witness the realm that this is, which is very beautiful, so joyous. And we were just talking about beforehand on this podcast, how vast this universe is. The human predicament, where we find ourself in this cosmos is so magnificent and awe-inspiring.
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E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
And that's probably a big invitation also for everyone who's listening, which has been helpful for me, is asking myself that question. At any point throughout my day in conversation with somebody, in creating something, is there... subconscious or conscious cognizance of how something is being perceived externally and how it's being appeared.
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E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
I've introduced you enough, my friend. I'm honestly getting quite tired of it.
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E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
Because in that alteration of behavior lies where we're trapped and we're not free. So that's been a helpful kind of pointer for my own personal journey, I think.
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E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
you know, and it kind of just weaves in as the wider umbrella for this whole conversation of like, we have our waking up process of perceiving who we are beyond the illusion of a self. And we still have our relative history and character logical stuff that we get to work through, um, as it relates to our own internal emotional landscape and connection and relationship with others. And, uh,
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E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
And for us to be living life in our own projections, it's just sad when we know what else is possible. And so as you've seen and worked with people for decades, you've like anybody who does anything for a while, you recognize patterns, right?
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E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
You know, and it's been talked about through Advaita, through millennia, that even the act or desire to dissolve the ego is in itself an egoic act. Exactly.
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E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
yeah because wherever you go there you are and your triggers are going to be what they are based on whatever it is that you still got to transcend like you know i say like life will present you with people and circumstances to reveal where you're not free life will present you with people and circumstances to reveal where you're not free it really is a probably my favorite quote of yours and really does encapsulate like what this human experience is and how it how it happens in the reflections and mirrors in our life and
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E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
when we've kind of dissolved a certain aspect, you know, or overcome one aspect of life, there is usually another mirror down the road that's coming, right?
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E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
Yeah, it's, again, the paradox of being a limitless being within this finite human experience. I remember listening to a tape where Ram Dass was talking about how he's tried every plant medicine and every mantra he's done and every teacher, you know, as if there is a place other than the human experience we're supposed to get to. And, you know, the deeper realization was like, what if...
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E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
You recognize that we're actually fairly predictable and that there's these patterns and limiting constraints that we share across the board throughout humanity. Now, you mentioned that we're essentially suffering a perspective that's rooted in words. Yeah, yeah. When you go to the core of it, and especially when somebody transmutes it and finds more freedom, Is it not more than that?
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E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
I actually came here to have a human experience. How funny, you know, us being humans. And it just invites, again, accepting more of our own humanity in the process of what it means to be here in this realm.
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E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
That's saying, I don't know what the truth is, but I know what love feels like. And we are here to have that feeling experience. Yeah. And... Thank you for the continual reminder that your presence is to remember that power. And your gift, as I've shared many times, in the articulation of the inner dimension is second to none. And I'm just grateful for the mirror that we get to be for each other.
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E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
And it's been a pleasure to spend more time with you, even going to Mexico for a week. I mean, we're just constantly joking. Anytime we're with each other, it's just one big shit show of just laughter and playfulness. It's amazing. And I love that you let that shine, you know? And you have been more and more as well on your own journey. And how I truly have felt, even since I've met you, like...
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E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
the arc of the impact and scale in which you're serving on the planet is like a rocket ship that's just taking off. And I get to see the events that are coming and the books that's eventually coming out soon. I hope. I just can't wait to continue to witness your journey, man. So thank you so much for sharing yourself today.
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E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
The best gift, man. What a joy. Thank you so much. And we'll link everywhere, people, all the touch points that you have from your Freedom Mastermind to the free offerings and social media platforms. People can find that all linked down in the description below. But is there any aspect of that you want to point people towards before we head out?
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E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
There's got to be, there's feelings attached in emotion that's energy stored physiologically. How do you see what it's actually made up of? Because words lead to, I guess, a narrative around ourselves, which informs the perspective we have. But when you see the substance of what is actually making up our limitations, how would you kind of break that down?
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E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
And yeah, last note for me, for everybody that's been tuning in, you know, we recently did a survey and got a few hundred responses from the community. And it's really unique and so different to like hear from a few hundred people who are a part of your community, the values, what they really see and their perspectives on what's being created here with the podcast and community.
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E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
And I would just, you know, in awe with the level of intelligence and insight and care and compassion of the people that's cultivated. through these comments and numbers on a screen, you know? But to really feel the hundreds of thousands and millions of people that tune into these conversations. It is like one big earth family.
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E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
And even like me sharing vulnerability, like some things that I've been working through, you know, I feel like also this community has become a space for me to be able to, you know, share and open up in my own process, as I hope it is for you in the comment sections and the people that you get to meet through the events and things. And so...
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E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
It's just a special thing we get to do in this day and age. Very fortunate. We're very blessed. Yeah. Thank you, brother. Much love. Thank you, everyone. Until next time. Take care.
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E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
Oh, man. Well, welcome back for the trilogy. Oh, we're going. We're live. Okay. Hello. You in plus one. You brought Scooby-Dooby today.
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E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
A lot of evidence to reinforce its existence.
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E134 - Peter Crone: Finding Freedom From Ego & Subconscious Limiting Beliefs
There might be one or two others. What?
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E126 - Gabby Bernstein: Rewire Limiting Beliefs, Heal Your Wounded Parts & Find Inner Freedom
Well, where I want to start today is hearing your thoughts on something that I've been contemplating and thinking about for a while, which is we have subconscious resistance in us to receiving and allowing life to give us love, abundance, well-being, because we have somatic familiarity with scarcity and fear and not enoughness.
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E126 - Gabby Bernstein: Rewire Limiting Beliefs, Heal Your Wounded Parts & Find Inner Freedom
And so in life, our mind might say we want things like a relationship, a career, a person, you know, to come into it. But our body feels we deserve something else and so what has been your journey exploring that dynamic
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E126 - Gabby Bernstein: Rewire Limiting Beliefs, Heal Your Wounded Parts & Find Inner Freedom
Yeah. Because we can often be under the illusion that there's just one day when I reach full enlightenment, I'll finally be able to serve others. And it's a disservice.
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E126 - Gabby Bernstein: Rewire Limiting Beliefs, Heal Your Wounded Parts & Find Inner Freedom
So much so, yeah. I have a lot of artist friends and I've seen firsthand, even in my own life, the creative process is such a process of self-discovery and it's really a gift to be able to share that process with other people, even just sharing your own story of what you're struggling through and maybe what insights you've learned along the way, that's just immensely helpful for people.
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E126 - Gabby Bernstein: Rewire Limiting Beliefs, Heal Your Wounded Parts & Find Inner Freedom
Addiction, like you mentioned, is important to look at how it's solving a problem within our own psyche. Like it's getting something right, meaning it's giving this release of tension from self. Yeah.
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E126 - Gabby Bernstein: Rewire Limiting Beliefs, Heal Your Wounded Parts & Find Inner Freedom
What was your journey then moving through that addiction and seeing other people go through their own process of, you know, addiction lies on a spectrum and there are many things that we can find ourselves addiction to. Personality is like the deepest one, perhaps, that we're addicted to fundamentally who we have been.
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E126 - Gabby Bernstein: Rewire Limiting Beliefs, Heal Your Wounded Parts & Find Inner Freedom
And so how does examining these parts, allowing them, welcoming them to the dinner table, start to diffuse the whole addiction we perceive has on us?
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E126 - Gabby Bernstein: Rewire Limiting Beliefs, Heal Your Wounded Parts & Find Inner Freedom
Yeah.
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E126 - Gabby Bernstein: Rewire Limiting Beliefs, Heal Your Wounded Parts & Find Inner Freedom
So a tool that I think would be good to highlight here, which really just makes it extremely practical in our own daily life and application of all this, is we can have the awareness of these behavioral adaptations and addictions that we have, small or big, right? And
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E126 - Gabby Bernstein: Rewire Limiting Beliefs, Heal Your Wounded Parts & Find Inner Freedom
A question that I've heard you refer to as well that can be really supportive is just asking, how is this trying to help you, right? How is this part trying to help you?
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E126 - Gabby Bernstein: Rewire Limiting Beliefs, Heal Your Wounded Parts & Find Inner Freedom
Which to expand that space there between stimulus and response.
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E126 - Gabby Bernstein: Rewire Limiting Beliefs, Heal Your Wounded Parts & Find Inner Freedom
A tool that I think is really supportive for that is our breath. Yes. To be able to respond consciously instead of the unconscious reacting.
Know Thyself
E126 - Gabby Bernstein: Rewire Limiting Beliefs, Heal Your Wounded Parts & Find Inner Freedom
Because a lot of times it's just immediate reaction.
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E126 - Gabby Bernstein: Rewire Limiting Beliefs, Heal Your Wounded Parts & Find Inner Freedom
or with any other things that we're struggling with in our life. For example, drinking alcohol, and there's this urge from seemingly nowhere inside of us that says, grab the bottle and we just do it, right?
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E126 - Gabby Bernstein: Rewire Limiting Beliefs, Heal Your Wounded Parts & Find Inner Freedom
Congrats.
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E126 - Gabby Bernstein: Rewire Limiting Beliefs, Heal Your Wounded Parts & Find Inner Freedom
Or pornography, and it's just that you just go straight to it. Expanding the space in between the choice is, I think, really important here. So we can come back to that.
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E126 - Gabby Bernstein: Rewire Limiting Beliefs, Heal Your Wounded Parts & Find Inner Freedom
That's exciting.
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E126 - Gabby Bernstein: Rewire Limiting Beliefs, Heal Your Wounded Parts & Find Inner Freedom
Yeah. Yeah. Often we think there's a there there. I think A lot of people can relate to if we want to cultivate true well-being and manifest a life by design, we need to look inwards and see what are those psychological subconscious programs that need addressing and need loving.
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E126 - Gabby Bernstein: Rewire Limiting Beliefs, Heal Your Wounded Parts & Find Inner Freedom
Beautiful. Thank you for sharing that. Yeah. Just we'll reinstate, because I think it's important that we hit the bullet points again one more time for people to write down. We'll put it on screen. Check-in process. Number one, notice when a part is activated, like feeling anxious or critical. Step two.
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E126 - Gabby Bernstein: Rewire Limiting Beliefs, Heal Your Wounded Parts & Find Inner Freedom
Number two, get curious about it rather than fighting it. Step three, ask what it's trying to do for you.
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E126 - Gabby Bernstein: Rewire Limiting Beliefs, Heal Your Wounded Parts & Find Inner Freedom
listen to what it needs. Ask it for what it needs. Yeah. Bring compassion to it from yourself.
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E126 - Gabby Bernstein: Rewire Limiting Beliefs, Heal Your Wounded Parts & Find Inner Freedom
A big theme of today's conversation is going to be your exploration through IFS, internal family systems, and parts works. Because again, we might say we want these things, and then there are these parts of us that are holding us back into a familiar past. And so what is IFS and parts work for people that don't know?
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E126 - Gabby Bernstein: Rewire Limiting Beliefs, Heal Your Wounded Parts & Find Inner Freedom
Curiosity, compassion, calmness, clarity, creativity, connection, courage, confidence. Eight Cs. So you got that right.
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E126 - Gabby Bernstein: Rewire Limiting Beliefs, Heal Your Wounded Parts & Find Inner Freedom
You're always going to miss a C. Yeah, those are great reference points. You know, even curiosity, like it's a subtle shift that makes a huge world of a difference instead of this automatic dismissal energy, which we can often have with these perceived negative parts of self, right? It's like, I don't want to deal with that, right? Just push it away. Yeah.
Know Thyself
E126 - Gabby Bernstein: Rewire Limiting Beliefs, Heal Your Wounded Parts & Find Inner Freedom
Instead, you're just like, okay, I don't need to accept you yet, but I'm curious a little bit about it.
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E126 - Gabby Bernstein: Rewire Limiting Beliefs, Heal Your Wounded Parts & Find Inner Freedom
Yeah, I feel like this applies both completely to self and these parts within us, but then also supporting others because we can, I have also had the tendency to want to fix something. When somebody comes to me with a problem, like, I'm smart, I got it, I can help you decode this, right? And oftentimes it's not only not what the part wants, but it's not what the part needs, right?
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E126 - Gabby Bernstein: Rewire Limiting Beliefs, Heal Your Wounded Parts & Find Inner Freedom
Instead of saying, how can I fix this? Asking, what does it need? And often it's like to be with it for a second.
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E126 - Gabby Bernstein: Rewire Limiting Beliefs, Heal Your Wounded Parts & Find Inner Freedom
Yeah, just to be with it for a second.
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E126 - Gabby Bernstein: Rewire Limiting Beliefs, Heal Your Wounded Parts & Find Inner Freedom
quick share basically every single day for the past many many years when i meditate in the morning i do it in front of a red light device red light therapy has over 4 000 peer-reviewed studies many of which show how it helps with cellular healing skin health by stimulating collagen testosterone sleep mood and so many others i personally feel the benefits in real time and think it's just a great way to get healthy light in the morning before sunrise
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E126 - Gabby Bernstein: Rewire Limiting Beliefs, Heal Your Wounded Parts & Find Inner Freedom
especially during the colder months where there's less sunlight outside bond charge is a great option for red light devices because they have the lowest emf on the market and there's no flicker they ship worldwide very quickly they're super easy with returns and exchanges if you need that and they also have an array of other science-backed products that you can check out
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E126 - Gabby Bernstein: Rewire Limiting Beliefs, Heal Your Wounded Parts & Find Inner Freedom
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E126 - Gabby Bernstein: Rewire Limiting Beliefs, Heal Your Wounded Parts & Find Inner Freedom
So when it relates to the now internal process of this, picking back up, making space for this first and foremost, again, there can be often the resistance and dismissal of these parts that we just don't want. And there are these exiled parts. And so what are exiled parts? And then let's talk about how we can start to make space for these more.
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E126 - Gabby Bernstein: Rewire Limiting Beliefs, Heal Your Wounded Parts & Find Inner Freedom
It feels like if we have a wound externally on us, it needs the right environment to heal. And those internal wounds similarly need that right environment, which is important to have the caution, right? Because if you try to fix it or do something rash right off the bat, it can worsen the wound, you know?
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E126 - Gabby Bernstein: Rewire Limiting Beliefs, Heal Your Wounded Parts & Find Inner Freedom
It feels like we often can have a fear of losing our parts. And it can make logical sense to us that like, you know, this part's not serving me, so yeah, let's heal it or maybe get rid of it, right? Which is its own illusion. Often these parts are what have driven our ambition to become successful or get many things that we like in our life, you know?
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E126 - Gabby Bernstein: Rewire Limiting Beliefs, Heal Your Wounded Parts & Find Inner Freedom
And so we have this fear of if I heal this part or let go of this part, then what about all these other things that I've garnered? And so what do you think about that? Because I've seen this so many times, right? So many amazing comedians were traumatized deeply and coped by being able to make their mother laugh, for example. Like Robin Williams is a powerful example.
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E126 - Gabby Bernstein: Rewire Limiting Beliefs, Heal Your Wounded Parts & Find Inner Freedom
And, you know, there's this deep feeling of if I'm okay with not being funny, you know, are these parts that I heal, then... My whole life has been built by traumatized aspects.
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E126 - Gabby Bernstein: Rewire Limiting Beliefs, Heal Your Wounded Parts & Find Inner Freedom
Yeah. Well, let's push. I want to push back a little bit.
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E126 - Gabby Bernstein: Rewire Limiting Beliefs, Heal Your Wounded Parts & Find Inner Freedom
Right. It feels like there's different places in which these energies can come from, right? Jumping into, for example, writing a book because you have this feeling of needing to control reality and scarcity of, if I don't do it, I won't make enough money or, you know, I won't be as famous or whatever the thing is, right?
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E126 - Gabby Bernstein: Rewire Limiting Beliefs, Heal Your Wounded Parts & Find Inner Freedom
Versus I have space, I have this inspiration that's like kind of evoking from within and you can feel the texture of both energies once you've experienced them both. One is coming from fear and another one's coming from love fundamentally, right? And so do you still label that part of being a controller to write your next book?
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E126 - Gabby Bernstein: Rewire Limiting Beliefs, Heal Your Wounded Parts & Find Inner Freedom
Because I feel like it's actually like a deeper aspect of us that is inspired to go and do it.
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E126 - Gabby Bernstein: Rewire Limiting Beliefs, Heal Your Wounded Parts & Find Inner Freedom
and they can take on a new form what's really an interesting i guess thought experiment for me is because we have these parts that we can gain awareness to and that we feel shame around for example but i really feel that there is this kind of divine guidance divine design whatever word you want to use whether it's the law of cause and effect or god or the universe or life
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E126 - Gabby Bernstein: Rewire Limiting Beliefs, Heal Your Wounded Parts & Find Inner Freedom
In a way, our wounding drives us to develop these amazing skill sets and things that become useful in our life's purpose and our dharma. So there's actually a function that is useful, and you can develop amazing skill sets that aren't obviously driven from traumatized parts, right?
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E126 - Gabby Bernstein: Rewire Limiting Beliefs, Heal Your Wounded Parts & Find Inner Freedom
But oftentimes, there's amazing capacities and skill sets and things we learn about ourself that are useful on the other side of being on our healing journey.
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E126 - Gabby Bernstein: Rewire Limiting Beliefs, Heal Your Wounded Parts & Find Inner Freedom
And I just think that's a really important thing because it invites a little bit more gratitude for the path and for the parts where we've been transgressed because it's good to feel like have a healthy amount of pride for the version of us that drove us to do the things that we did.
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E126 - Gabby Bernstein: Rewire Limiting Beliefs, Heal Your Wounded Parts & Find Inner Freedom
Mm-hmm. It feels like awareness in and of itself starts to slowly unwrap.
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E126 - Gabby Bernstein: Rewire Limiting Beliefs, Heal Your Wounded Parts & Find Inner Freedom
Like even just saying, I see you, you know, and just noticing it.
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E126 - Gabby Bernstein: Rewire Limiting Beliefs, Heal Your Wounded Parts & Find Inner Freedom
And that we're always doing the best we can with the level of awareness that we have.
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E126 - Gabby Bernstein: Rewire Limiting Beliefs, Heal Your Wounded Parts & Find Inner Freedom
one of i guess a part of myself personally has been like perfectionism and trying to get things like so perfectly aligned in their and both their function and their appearance and as well with myself and even just like recently having bigger awareness on this on this part of myself and feeling so proud for the version of andre that was like so driven at such a young age to create this life for himself and
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E126 - Gabby Bernstein: Rewire Limiting Beliefs, Heal Your Wounded Parts & Find Inner Freedom
I feel grateful for him. He's created a really abundant, beautiful life around him. And the tension, the subtle tension that shows up sometimes in my life of altering my behaviors in any way to be perceived a certain way, like...
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E126 - Gabby Bernstein: Rewire Limiting Beliefs, Heal Your Wounded Parts & Find Inner Freedom
just changed in any way just making more space I found personally making more space for that and just examining it and just having awareness for it to like allow it to be there has diffused the energy in which it's coming from and given me more access to self as well yeah totally I even think about starting this podcast.
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E126 - Gabby Bernstein: Rewire Limiting Beliefs, Heal Your Wounded Parts & Find Inner Freedom
The original podcast art that I kind of created from the start was very, it's like very spiritual looking. It's got like sacred geometry in the background. And I could see part of myself that was projecting onto like that, for example, of like who I wanted to be and become. And the more that I'm growing on my own path, the more that I see
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E126 - Gabby Bernstein: Rewire Limiting Beliefs, Heal Your Wounded Parts & Find Inner Freedom
Like I've embodied a lot of kind of who I've desired to become, you know, and I have the desire less to be seen as like a spiritual person because of that, you know?
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E126 - Gabby Bernstein: Rewire Limiting Beliefs, Heal Your Wounded Parts & Find Inner Freedom
And making that space like we keep coming back to, right? Between the stimulus and response, there is that space which we can have a choice and we can expand it. It's a win to notice that space, even in the most subtle moments.
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E126 - Gabby Bernstein: Rewire Limiting Beliefs, Heal Your Wounded Parts & Find Inner Freedom
Starts to grow.
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E126 - Gabby Bernstein: Rewire Limiting Beliefs, Heal Your Wounded Parts & Find Inner Freedom
It seems like we feel there's like this revolutionary, like healing process where our issues won't happen in our reality anymore. And it invites a lot more spaciousness with what you're sharing to like, it's a subtle repatterning awareness. And it's like, it's a gentle process instead of this huge revolution, you know, which might feel like in the moments.
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E126 - Gabby Bernstein: Rewire Limiting Beliefs, Heal Your Wounded Parts & Find Inner Freedom
But yeah, it just invites more patience on the path, which is great.
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E126 - Gabby Bernstein: Rewire Limiting Beliefs, Heal Your Wounded Parts & Find Inner Freedom
How have you balanced the psychological work with the spiritual realization aspect of this? Because there are these parts of us that hold us back in our personality and different things. And yet we were speaking to the reality of us that is deeper, that encompasses that, right? Like the blue sky that holds all the personality substructures that are the clouds and the weather and all of this.
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E126 - Gabby Bernstein: Rewire Limiting Beliefs, Heal Your Wounded Parts & Find Inner Freedom
And so how do you balance not reifying and further solidifying and identifying as these parts? but building a relationship with it that allows it to free it. Because it almost feels like it serves a purpose, identifying and feeling these parts of yourself. And then that is almost what gives it permission to dissolve more.
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E126 - Gabby Bernstein: Rewire Limiting Beliefs, Heal Your Wounded Parts & Find Inner Freedom
Yeah. Is there a part of you that you feel you need to make space for more now today than most?
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E126 - Gabby Bernstein: Rewire Limiting Beliefs, Heal Your Wounded Parts & Find Inner Freedom
It seems like anybody who's done anything substantial in life has been able to do so because of an amazing team behind them. And I feel like even in my own journey with building a team, there is this fear that we can't have of somebody not doing it up to par of where we would want in the process of delegation and building a team and partners where it feels like you can trust.
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E126 - Gabby Bernstein: Rewire Limiting Beliefs, Heal Your Wounded Parts & Find Inner Freedom
It's a real thing that I think a lot of people struggle with as they build their career. is like finding, you know, often these controller parts that just want to get it right and will probably do it better if they do it themselves, but being okay with it being done at 80 to 90% of what you thought it would have been. And it seems like it's really needed if you want to scale because you can't.
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E126 - Gabby Bernstein: Rewire Limiting Beliefs, Heal Your Wounded Parts & Find Inner Freedom
I think all this work is just bringing us back so much so into our heart and like a feeling of freedom that is our birthright. That feels like a lot of work sometimes to get to, but we get glimpses of it more and more and it starts to become the reality in which we live. And it's such an amazing place to live life from.
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E126 - Gabby Bernstein: Rewire Limiting Beliefs, Heal Your Wounded Parts & Find Inner Freedom
And I think for those of us that taste it more of a predominant reality, we're passionate about sharing others and helping to whatever degree we can, guiding them back into that place of realization because... this life is such a gift and tomorrow is not promised. And like to embody more of that energy, let more of self come through is so amazing.
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E126 - Gabby Bernstein: Rewire Limiting Beliefs, Heal Your Wounded Parts & Find Inner Freedom
And just thank you so much for your continued dedication towards sharing your process around it all.
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E126 - Gabby Bernstein: Rewire Limiting Beliefs, Heal Your Wounded Parts & Find Inner Freedom
My honor, my pleasure, actually, literally. This conversation was amazing and flew by. So fast.
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E126 - Gabby Bernstein: Rewire Limiting Beliefs, Heal Your Wounded Parts & Find Inner Freedom
But let's just create a little bit of space in this here towards the end in case anything else is alive. Having the context of the conversation we had, is there any other topic or thing that you think would be valuable for the listeners at this point?
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E126 - Gabby Bernstein: Rewire Limiting Beliefs, Heal Your Wounded Parts & Find Inner Freedom
It's a really important reminder because it can be kind of insidious and like masquerade itself and how like these parts are showing up because we might label a lot of those behaviors are like going to yoga and eating like whole foods and like things that are good to do. Right.
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E126 - Gabby Bernstein: Rewire Limiting Beliefs, Heal Your Wounded Parts & Find Inner Freedom
But the place it's coming from oftentimes can be, especially in the health and wellness space and spiritual communities, is actually not coming from a free energy. It's not coming from the love of your body. It can come from shame and bypassing. Control, yeah. Yeah.
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E126 - Gabby Bernstein: Rewire Limiting Beliefs, Heal Your Wounded Parts & Find Inner Freedom
And it's like, no matter how many things we get right, quote unquote, with our behavior, if it's coming from a psychologically limited place, right? Like subconscious patterns that are not free, then we're going to, and I've seen this so many times, people can't resolve a health issue because they're not addressing the actual underlying thing, right? That's right.
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E126 - Gabby Bernstein: Rewire Limiting Beliefs, Heal Your Wounded Parts & Find Inner Freedom
Yeah.
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E126 - Gabby Bernstein: Rewire Limiting Beliefs, Heal Your Wounded Parts & Find Inner Freedom
What did you learn about moments where you're like deep in depression, where you really can't see like the surface of the air?
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E126 - Gabby Bernstein: Rewire Limiting Beliefs, Heal Your Wounded Parts & Find Inner Freedom
Yeah, I think it just requires such discernment and like there can be a lot of judgment towards Western medical system because of course there is a lot of not so great things that happen in the industry in terms of relation for chronic illness, right? Acute injury, Western pharmaceutical. Oh, yeah. Yes. They're just drug dealers. Yeah.
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E126 - Gabby Bernstein: Rewire Limiting Beliefs, Heal Your Wounded Parts & Find Inner Freedom
Yeah. And so I have even caught myself really like having a lot of resistance to the pharmaceutical industry because it's become such a massive business. Well, how old are you? 27.
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E126 - Gabby Bernstein: Rewire Limiting Beliefs, Heal Your Wounded Parts & Find Inner Freedom
We'll see. You have to be seen.
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E126 - Gabby Bernstein: Rewire Limiting Beliefs, Heal Your Wounded Parts & Find Inner Freedom
Yeah. Well, where I was going with it is just, you know, there is—
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E126 - Gabby Bernstein: Rewire Limiting Beliefs, Heal Your Wounded Parts & Find Inner Freedom
Yeah. And again, just discerning and doing your own research above all else, right? Because there's so many misdiagnoses as well. I almost lost my mom because of one. And there's so many examples where it goes horribly, you know? Definitely. But there are a lot of amazing stories, examples as well, too.
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E126 - Gabby Bernstein: Rewire Limiting Beliefs, Heal Your Wounded Parts & Find Inner Freedom
So, you know, there's, in terms of human suffering, there's so many aspects in one which could look at something, right? From the mental to the physical to the biochemical to the spiritual, right? And I think it's important to give grace and space for people figuring it out.
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E126 - Gabby Bernstein: Rewire Limiting Beliefs, Heal Your Wounded Parts & Find Inner Freedom
Mm-hmm. Just to kind of wrap up on that, what have been your mindfulness practices? How has meditation played a role in your journey of all this? Because we spoke to you many times how the awareness and the making space for these parts of us and going on our own healing journey
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E126 - Gabby Bernstein: Rewire Limiting Beliefs, Heal Your Wounded Parts & Find Inner Freedom
developing clarity of mind to be able to look at these things and discern is so important and meditation is one of the biggest things that can help lessen the identification we have with our thoughts and emotions it allows us to actually more effectively do parts work when we're not so tightly wound up and identified with them yeah and so i think we can get caught in the either or paradox of like just extremes like it's either none of me and i'm gonna bypass it right or
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E126 - Gabby Bernstein: Rewire Limiting Beliefs, Heal Your Wounded Parts & Find Inner Freedom
Yeah.
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E126 - Gabby Bernstein: Rewire Limiting Beliefs, Heal Your Wounded Parts & Find Inner Freedom
Any last words on the purpose again that... these parts serve. I think it's a really important reminder to just hit one last time before we bounce out of this podcast is examining the parts of what these things are solving within us diffuse a lot of the shame that we have around them.
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E126 - Gabby Bernstein: Rewire Limiting Beliefs, Heal Your Wounded Parts & Find Inner Freedom
Well said. Thank you so much for coming on today.
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E126 - Gabby Bernstein: Rewire Limiting Beliefs, Heal Your Wounded Parts & Find Inner Freedom
This was fun. Yeah, it's so special. Anything you want to share with, we'll link everything down in the description where people can stay connected with your workbook, et cetera.
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E126 - Gabby Bernstein: Rewire Limiting Beliefs, Heal Your Wounded Parts & Find Inner Freedom
Amazing.
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E126 - Gabby Bernstein: Rewire Limiting Beliefs, Heal Your Wounded Parts & Find Inner Freedom
Thank you.
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E126 - Gabby Bernstein: Rewire Limiting Beliefs, Heal Your Wounded Parts & Find Inner Freedom
So nice to meet you. Yeah.
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E126 - Gabby Bernstein: Rewire Limiting Beliefs, Heal Your Wounded Parts & Find Inner Freedom
Thanks. Yeah. It's perfect. Yeah, it's interesting. You know, there are both those, the, I guess, parts of us that are maybe controlling or perfectionistic and then the genuine loving impulse for beauty and interior design and those things.
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E126 - Gabby Bernstein: Rewire Limiting Beliefs, Heal Your Wounded Parts & Find Inner Freedom
Yeah.
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E126 - Gabby Bernstein: Rewire Limiting Beliefs, Heal Your Wounded Parts & Find Inner Freedom
Gratitude for that part as well.
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E126 - Gabby Bernstein: Rewire Limiting Beliefs, Heal Your Wounded Parts & Find Inner Freedom
And yeah, thank you so much. I really enjoyed this conversation. It was so fun, so peacefully. And big love to you and the work that you're doing.
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E126 - Gabby Bernstein: Rewire Limiting Beliefs, Heal Your Wounded Parts & Find Inner Freedom
Thank you again, everybody. To those of you that have been tuning into this episode of the Know Thyself podcast, and you made it all the way to this part, thank you and all of your parts for making it this far. And it's just so amazing to build a community where this level of self-inquiry is present. I think it's just an amazing atmosphere to be a part of.
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E126 - Gabby Bernstein: Rewire Limiting Beliefs, Heal Your Wounded Parts & Find Inner Freedom
And as always, please let us know where you're at along your own journey in this process. Always love reading. And until next time, be well.
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E126 - Gabby Bernstein: Rewire Limiting Beliefs, Heal Your Wounded Parts & Find Inner Freedom
I'm really looking forward to diving into that check-in process and the protector parts. But first, you brought up a couple of things that are really important, I think, to set the stage for where I would like to dance with you in this conversation, because this being the Know Thyself podcast, there are many different perceptions one can have on who we are and what is self, right?
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E126 - Gabby Bernstein: Rewire Limiting Beliefs, Heal Your Wounded Parts & Find Inner Freedom
You could have the lowercase S self, which you might categorize as different personality substructures and subparts that we can work with that are important for characterological growth and like human developmental journey. You could say a capital S self is more of that nature that is, which you mentioned in your book, Self-Help, those eight Cs, which we can unpack.
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E126 - Gabby Bernstein: Rewire Limiting Beliefs, Heal Your Wounded Parts & Find Inner Freedom
really are a deeper pointing to a space that we can hold within us because we realize that we're not actually our personality. We're not actually our identifications with our mind, with our body, with our career and all these things. And so we start to dive into deeper aspects of who we are.
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E126 - Gabby Bernstein: Rewire Limiting Beliefs, Heal Your Wounded Parts & Find Inner Freedom
And I am personally really interested at holding both because life is very paradoxical and we do have a personality that holds us back and creates suffering. And we're also, we have access to a reality that is also beyond it. And so to just kind of explore these a little bit further, one could say the conventional psychological work of your personality is important in healing that trauma.
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E126 - Gabby Bernstein: Rewire Limiting Beliefs, Heal Your Wounded Parts & Find Inner Freedom
And then also waking up to who you are beyond it was kind of like absolute reality. So I feel like we have relative reality, we have that conventional reality, and then we have like the absolute reality that we can tap into through meditation and mindfulness practices.
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E126 - Gabby Bernstein: Rewire Limiting Beliefs, Heal Your Wounded Parts & Find Inner Freedom
So I guess I would like to just hear your perspective because self-acceptance, which a lot of the IFS work is surrounded around accepting these parts, welcoming them to the dinner table.
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E126 - Gabby Bernstein: Rewire Limiting Beliefs, Heal Your Wounded Parts & Find Inner Freedom
self-acceptance from the kind of absolute view is a project of the divided self right and it's in a way it's kind of like a dog chasing its own tail meaning the only way to maintain the drama is to pretend that the self to be accepted is somehow different from the self that is accepting and so it's it's important to hold that perspective that we are not that and yet
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E126 - Gabby Bernstein: Rewire Limiting Beliefs, Heal Your Wounded Parts & Find Inner Freedom
by giving space and allowing these different parts of us to exist and to and to be with them it does create more of a sense of freedom and our relative human relational experience so totally just kind of said a lot there but i do want to get your perspective as we kind of hold both so before we dive deeper into the protector parts and all these things What is your experience of capital S self?
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E126 - Gabby Bernstein: Rewire Limiting Beliefs, Heal Your Wounded Parts & Find Inner Freedom
Hey, everyone. Welcome back to the Know Thyself podcast. Our guest today is a multiple times over New York Times bestselling author. She explores many themes around psychological healing and spiritual awakening. And I just love her raw honesty and personality as it comes through and sharing her insights along her own personal path. Gabby Bernstein, thanks for being here.
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E126 - Gabby Bernstein: Rewire Limiting Beliefs, Heal Your Wounded Parts & Find Inner Freedom
Like our true self, what are the eight Cs? So we can have that as a reference point of like home that we're walking back to.
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E126 - Gabby Bernstein: Rewire Limiting Beliefs, Heal Your Wounded Parts & Find Inner Freedom
Yeah.
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E126 - Gabby Bernstein: Rewire Limiting Beliefs, Heal Your Wounded Parts & Find Inner Freedom
Yeah. And honestly, you meet a lot of interesting characters during this podcast thing. And there is a saying, those who know, knows who know. Meaning stillness knows stillness, right? And calmness knows calmness. Curiosity, like a lot of these qualities. Once you're in like a quiet place within yourself, you see how noisy other things around you can be, especially people.
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E126 - Gabby Bernstein: Rewire Limiting Beliefs, Heal Your Wounded Parts & Find Inner Freedom
And so self recognizes self.
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E126 - Gabby Bernstein: Rewire Limiting Beliefs, Heal Your Wounded Parts & Find Inner Freedom
Yeah, it's like... I think we can even look externally in the world and see a lot of tragedy that's happening. And like, how can we play our part in bringing healing to the world? And a lot of the, I think, old paradigm of thinking of things is like removing darkness in the world. And instead of, you know, trying to take darkness out of a room, simply turning your own light on.
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E126 - Gabby Bernstein: Rewire Limiting Beliefs, Heal Your Wounded Parts & Find Inner Freedom
And so, yeah, we're lights that are turning on and we really illuminate the path for others in so many ways. And like you mentioned, it's a journey to get there, you know, from the head to the heart. And there are all these parts within us that keep us kind of stuck in old personalities where we had a thwarted childhood developmental experience that stays with us. And
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E126 - Gabby Bernstein: Rewire Limiting Beliefs, Heal Your Wounded Parts & Find Inner Freedom
Yeah, come join us. Grab a cup of tea. We're going to talk healing and all the things.
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E126 - Gabby Bernstein: Rewire Limiting Beliefs, Heal Your Wounded Parts & Find Inner Freedom
So I know it's been a journey getting to this place. Yeah, big time. And I want to unpack, as this can be really supportive, the process that we're going to go into, the context that we're going to give for healing and revealing your true self is really so important. So what are protector parts? Let's start there so we can understand that.
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E130 - Gregg Braden: Artificial vs Ancient Intelligence: The Rise of Tech Without Losing Our Power
You have a new book called Pure Human as well, which follows along alongside a lot of these themes we're going to pick apart today. In 1945, human knowledge was doubling every 25 years on average. Now it's doubling every 12 hours. And we see this exponential rise of technology and human knowledge, and yet, unless coupled with the wisdom to wield those tools, they could contribute to our demise.
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E130 - Gregg Braden: Artificial vs Ancient Intelligence: The Rise of Tech Without Losing Our Power
would you not say it's a small sect of these transhumanists who are really pushing for the complete either or of, you know, like on 2045, which is Ray Kurzweil's Singularity kind of website, says by 2030 to 2035, an avatar with an artificial brain in which a human personality is transferred at the end of one's life by 2045, a hologram-like avatar.
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E130 - Gregg Braden: Artificial vs Ancient Intelligence: The Rise of Tech Without Losing Our Power
And so there are these, in the sect of kind of materialist, Silicon Valley juggernauts. You know, there are some people that are pioneering this, but there's also many other people that are not as hastily excited to embrace, like, swap human life.
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E130 - Gregg Braden: Artificial vs Ancient Intelligence: The Rise of Tech Without Losing Our Power
And so in many ways, if we don't acknowledge the power within our humanness and slow down to the same capacity we're speeding up, There's going to be a lot of things that we're just not tapping into that we're missing. And so what is that sacredness? What is that power within humanness that we need to recognize?
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E130 - Gregg Braden: Artificial vs Ancient Intelligence: The Rise of Tech Without Losing Our Power
Because we also don't know fully what the price would be to do.
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E130 - Gregg Braden: Artificial vs Ancient Intelligence: The Rise of Tech Without Losing Our Power
Just like any technology, any tool.
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E130 - Gregg Braden: Artificial vs Ancient Intelligence: The Rise of Tech Without Losing Our Power
And the hastily reckless embracing of it without fully knowing what the potential consequences are.
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E130 - Gregg Braden: Artificial vs Ancient Intelligence: The Rise of Tech Without Losing Our Power
Yeah, we also had Federico Faggin on a podcast who created one of the world's first microprocessor. And he tried actually for many, many years to create consciousness in that way and could not. And that's what led him on.
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E130 - Gregg Braden: Artificial vs Ancient Intelligence: The Rise of Tech Without Losing Our Power
This is also like what you referred to Rupert Sheldrake's morphic resonance.
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E130 - Gregg Braden: Artificial vs Ancient Intelligence: The Rise of Tech Without Losing Our Power
Polyamorous neurons.
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E130 - Gregg Braden: Artificial vs Ancient Intelligence: The Rise of Tech Without Losing Our Power
Yeah, and if we, again, widely kind of accept and embrace AI kind of chips, for example, into human biology, if we don't use it, we'll lose it. And there can be definitely widespread atrophy if we're not using the faculties that are biologically evolved to.
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E130 - Gregg Braden: Artificial vs Ancient Intelligence: The Rise of Tech Without Losing Our Power
The atrophy, if you don't use it, you lose it.
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E130 - Gregg Braden: Artificial vs Ancient Intelligence: The Rise of Tech Without Losing Our Power
Very dystopic view.
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E130 - Gregg Braden: Artificial vs Ancient Intelligence: The Rise of Tech Without Losing Our Power
Yeah. And so in the advent of so much of the kind of exponential technology and transhumanist development from gene editing with CRISPR to cloning, we're just starting to get a glimpse at what is lost and the excitement of embracing something. Dahlia the sheep is an example of
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E130 - Gregg Braden: Artificial vs Ancient Intelligence: The Rise of Tech Without Losing Our Power
where things went wrong in the attempt to clone a sheep, which they successfully did, but then it died half its lifespan, right?
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E130 - Gregg Braden: Artificial vs Ancient Intelligence: The Rise of Tech Without Losing Our Power
Yeah, it's very fascinating.
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E130 - Gregg Braden: Artificial vs Ancient Intelligence: The Rise of Tech Without Losing Our Power
Yeah, it seems like with the advent of any new innovation, there's both the light and the dark side of it, right? The immense possibility for supporting handicapped folks and like so many amazing applications from the innovation of the technology and also the aspects that we're integrating without the awareness of what it can do to us.
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E130 - Gregg Braden: Artificial vs Ancient Intelligence: The Rise of Tech Without Losing Our Power
A quick share, the world is moving faster and faster, it seems, and hopefully all of this talk of AI and tech advancement is not stressing you out too much. I am a personal fan of one, awareness of what's happening, and then two, becoming an agent for the change you wish to see in the world. And for me, the foundation of that empowerment is our health.
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E130 - Gregg Braden: Artificial vs Ancient Intelligence: The Rise of Tech Without Losing Our Power
And a good night's sleep is absolutely foundational to health. Not just how much we sleep, but how deeply. And one huge factor of that is what we're sleeping on. Many mattresses unfortunately are made with harsh synthetic materials that release harmful off-gassing, which is not great for our health. especially since we spent so much time breathing it in.
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E130 - Gregg Braden: Artificial vs Ancient Intelligence: The Rise of Tech Without Losing Our Power
And that's why I am thrilled to share about a healthier alternative, Birch Living. I've been sleeping on a birch mattress for a while now, and I've absolutely loved it. It's just the best mattress in my opinion. Birch beds are made with raw materials sourced straight from nature, like organic fair trade cotton, natural latex, both of which are comfortable, durable, and environmentally conscious.
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E130 - Gregg Braden: Artificial vs Ancient Intelligence: The Rise of Tech Without Losing Our Power
Birch ships for free right to your door. It's super easy to set up and they're so confident you'll love it that they offer a 100-night sleep trial and a 25-year warranty. I hope all of you enjoy deep and restful sleep this year. To go check out Birch, go to birchliving.com slash knowthyself for 25% off site-wide plus two free EcoRest pillows with a mattress purchase.
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E130 - Gregg Braden: Artificial vs Ancient Intelligence: The Rise of Tech Without Losing Our Power
That's birchliving.com slash knowthyself to get 25% off. Back to the show.
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E130 - Gregg Braden: Artificial vs Ancient Intelligence: The Rise of Tech Without Losing Our Power
because we've hinted at it many times, we also spoke to it in our last conversation when you referenced the untapped potential in our humanness and the exciting new science that's emerging of really how powerful our biology is, but then also in the ancient wisdom traditions that have talked about cities and talked about the S-I-D-D-H-I-S, not cities like the place you live, that refer to
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E130 - Gregg Braden: Artificial vs Ancient Intelligence: The Rise of Tech Without Losing Our Power
an immense capacity that we're just only beginning to understand that's only physical within the carbon-based biological system. And so when you refer to that untapped potential, what are you specifically referring to?
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E130 - Gregg Braden: Artificial vs Ancient Intelligence: The Rise of Tech Without Losing Our Power
I feel like a lucky, lucky man getting to do this.
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E130 - Gregg Braden: Artificial vs Ancient Intelligence: The Rise of Tech Without Losing Our Power
Yeah, and we don't have to look any further than the technology that isn't replacing our biology, but is enhancing it currently, like with our phones and everything. We can see how it's an immense tool, and yet it thwarts so many aspects of our capacity.
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E130 - Gregg Braden: Artificial vs Ancient Intelligence: The Rise of Tech Without Losing Our Power
I know, but we're still kind of cyborgs in a way with the technology we have, and it's just getting closer to our skin.
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E130 - Gregg Braden: Artificial vs Ancient Intelligence: The Rise of Tech Without Losing Our Power
Can you refine that? Because a battle between good and evil feels like it, to me, falls a little bit just in the verbiage that's used kind of under a... I suppose, magical, mythical level of consciousness or stage of development. And there are just different polarities in a way, right?
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E130 - Gregg Braden: Artificial vs Ancient Intelligence: The Rise of Tech Without Losing Our Power
Yeah, that was great. I love that whole bit. That was amazing.
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E130 - Gregg Braden: Artificial vs Ancient Intelligence: The Rise of Tech Without Losing Our Power
Yeah, there was some pretty weird stuff going on.
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E130 - Gregg Braden: Artificial vs Ancient Intelligence: The Rise of Tech Without Losing Our Power
It's almost like a mockery.
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E130 - Gregg Braden: Artificial vs Ancient Intelligence: The Rise of Tech Without Losing Our Power
Yeah, because the awareness of what's at play is really important, but coupled with that needs to be like you do so eloquently and I strive to do on this podcast is share empowering messages about what we're really made of, who we are, and allowing and supporting people to become sovereign individuals. In that state, you have the most capacity to affect change. I've shared the quote from MLK Jr.
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E130 - Gregg Braden: Artificial vs Ancient Intelligence: The Rise of Tech Without Losing Our Power
many times that those who love peace need to learn how to organize themselves as much as those who love war. And so, again, I appreciate the invitation and reminder that love isn't a docile kind of thing. I feel like also can be viewed as a turning away of all of these problems. You know, it's like the original kind of Woodstock kind of energy, which is great.
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E130 - Gregg Braden: Artificial vs Ancient Intelligence: The Rise of Tech Without Losing Our Power
The evolved 2.0 version of it is to still embrace the energy of love and yet don't turn your face away from it, but actually be an agent of change because we need people who embrace and understand themselves and embrace love to be in positions of power that are making decisions that affect humanity at large.
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E130 - Gregg Braden: Artificial vs Ancient Intelligence: The Rise of Tech Without Losing Our Power
Yeah, it's just like Bucky Fuller's quote, building new systems that make the old ones obsolete. You know, it's important to become aware of it. And then where are you investing your time? Are you building towards new systems or are you going to stay in that fear paradigm? God bless the well-intentioned woman that came up to you. But she, in that instance, is in the energy of fear.
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E130 - Gregg Braden: Artificial vs Ancient Intelligence: The Rise of Tech Without Losing Our Power
It's almost like an intellectual chastity belt.
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E130 - Gregg Braden: Artificial vs Ancient Intelligence: The Rise of Tech Without Losing Our Power
Well, I love how you share in Pure Human as well that consciousness informs itself through its creation. And you look at through so many different books. You actually read this book.
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E130 - Gregg Braden: Artificial vs Ancient Intelligence: The Rise of Tech Without Losing Our Power
No, I always got... I have to honor the guest. But it's a really important reflection because you see through the matrix, through Avatar, through these movies and media, how... the collective consciousness is kind of informing both its desires, hopes, fears, and very real possibilities that are on the horizon to come.
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E130 - Gregg Braden: Artificial vs Ancient Intelligence: The Rise of Tech Without Losing Our Power
The matrix being one of us, like one sector understanding of the transhuman movement taken so far down one rabbit hole is like the matrix where humans are used for their biological electrical charge and And power for, you know, for that greater technological.
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E130 - Gregg Braden: Artificial vs Ancient Intelligence: The Rise of Tech Without Losing Our Power
Yeah, and there must be a middle path. There must be a middle way. So I was just going to get to that.
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E130 - Gregg Braden: Artificial vs Ancient Intelligence: The Rise of Tech Without Losing Our Power
The transhumanists could adopt that term, though, as transcending perceived limitations as well. So I feel like there needs to be a more refined definition for divinity in the way you're using it.
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E130 - Gregg Braden: Artificial vs Ancient Intelligence: The Rise of Tech Without Losing Our Power
Nikola Tesla has quoted something along the lines of, when science begins to study non-physical phenomena, it will make more progress in a decade than all of its previous existence. And I don't exactly know how one studies non-physical phenomena, but I do, I can relate with, and maybe you can share, but...
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E130 - Gregg Braden: Artificial vs Ancient Intelligence: The Rise of Tech Without Losing Our Power
as we as we talked about earlier how consciousness informs itself through its creations and we have the societal cultural fascination attraction for these superheroes superman like capabilities and before we close out if you're open to exploring this a little bit more it's it's speaking to an aspect of the innate power we we feel we have within us that we haven't fully unlocked yet for most of us sure and just to kind of round out this whole conversation
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E130 - Gregg Braden: Artificial vs Ancient Intelligence: The Rise of Tech Without Losing Our Power
please share anything that you have with what I just said. But also there is this whole, from our conversation last time, talking about the power of the neurites of the heart to mirror neurons, to neuropeptides, to the quantum biology, to a lot of the emerging science about the power of being human is emerging. It sheds some positive light.
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E130 - Gregg Braden: Artificial vs Ancient Intelligence: The Rise of Tech Without Losing Our Power
Yeah, maybe before his time.
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E130 - Gregg Braden: Artificial vs Ancient Intelligence: The Rise of Tech Without Losing Our Power
You said returning to wholeness is our prime directive. And as these messages of empowerment, both awareness of the possibilities for the light and the dark and what happens in the next coming 10 years, going to be some pretty wild stuff. What is best for us to do is to return to wholeness so we can best be an agent of change and support people in our unique capacity that we have to.
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E130 - Gregg Braden: Artificial vs Ancient Intelligence: The Rise of Tech Without Losing Our Power
I see you living your dharma, doing what you do, writing your books, coming on this podcast, sharing the way you have for decades. It's really supported so many people. And I think we all yearn for that return and remembrance of wholeness and discovering, unlocking, sharing what is our unique gift, how we can show up in the unique capacity we can. And any messages you have for...
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E130 - Gregg Braden: Artificial vs Ancient Intelligence: The Rise of Tech Without Losing Our Power
how you feel people can most effectively do so? Because I know it's a longing we all have.
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E130 - Gregg Braden: Artificial vs Ancient Intelligence: The Rise of Tech Without Losing Our Power
Thank you. Thank you for sharing. I resonate so strongly, obviously, throughout this whole conversation, just with themes that are really important to put at the forefront of people's awareness and then do with it what you may, you know?
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E130 - Gregg Braden: Artificial vs Ancient Intelligence: The Rise of Tech Without Losing Our Power
Yeah. So many important reminders. Greg, thank you so much for coming back on. We'll leave a link to Pure Human where people can check out the book and anything else you want to share before we wrap up where people can stay connected.
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E130 - Gregg Braden: Artificial vs Ancient Intelligence: The Rise of Tech Without Losing Our Power
Blessings. Everybody, thank you so much for tuning in to this episode of the Know Thyself podcast. Thanks for coming on this journey. What a fun ride. Until next time, be well.
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E130 - Gregg Braden: Artificial vs Ancient Intelligence: The Rise of Tech Without Losing Our Power
Greg, welcome back.
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E130 - Gregg Braden: Artificial vs Ancient Intelligence: The Rise of Tech Without Losing Our Power
So I want to hold and put the evolutionary heritage of our untapped human potential. I want to dive into that in a moment. It seems as though, I mean, humanity is baby steps away from super intelligent AGI technology at a scale we had not previously dreamed of. And it's happening much faster than we can conceive of. And in a way, in a sense, it's an inevitability. Like it's happening.
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E130 - Gregg Braden: Artificial vs Ancient Intelligence: The Rise of Tech Without Losing Our Power
The genie is kind of out of the bottle in many ways. What do you think about the perspective that humanity may very well serve the purpose of the transition between carbon-based to silicon-based life? Like taking out our own, I guess, egocentric human desire to live forever. What do you think about that transition and that perspective?
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E130 - Gregg Braden: Artificial vs Ancient Intelligence: The Rise of Tech Without Losing Our Power
I was filled with joy to see that this week you were on the schedule to come in studio and just to see you. And man, I love the continued brotherhood, friendship, and service that we share together. And I'm hoping this conversation can pull along similar threads to our last conversation, diving deeper into some nuance.