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Boz arranges a day of healing and massages at her house on The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills, and nothing could be more therapeutic than watching Kyle throw a temper tantrum. To watch this recap on video, listen to our Traitors bonus episodes, and participate in live episode threads, go to Patreon.com/watchwhatcrappens. Tickets for the Mounting Hysteria Tour are now on sale at watchwhatcrappens.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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I watched Dune Prophecy recently and I love that show. That's on Max.
And are you going to also watch Severance season two? Because everyone's talking about that one.
I cannot wait about Severance to start again. So yeah, I'll be doing the same thing. Watching it all through Prime. It's convenient to not have to leave the Prime Video app to switch between all of these subscriptions.
So check out subscriptions on Prime Video. Some of our favorite Housewives episodes are when the cast goes on group vacations. I mean, hello, we just watched SLC go nuts in Mexico. Or what about Scary Island? Or what about Morocco? I mean, it goes on and on and on.
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Hello and welcome to Watch for Crappins, a podcast about all that crap on Bravo that we just love to talk about. I'm Ben Mandelker and joining me today, the illustrious and wonderful Ronnie Karam. Hi, Ronnie. How are you? Hello, Ben. Well, Ronnie, we have only like two or three more days before the Mounting Hysteria Tour kicks off in San Francisco this Friday. So you all better come join us.
Then the very next day we'll be in San Diego. And in both shows, we're going to be doing the reunion part one of SLC. We'll do the first half in San Francisco, the second half in San Diego. It's going to be a lot of fun. That, of course, had an Salt Lake City had an amazing season, so excited to cap it off with these live shows. Tickets are at WatchWhatCrappens.com.
And next week, we have the Golden Crappies. Be sure to vote for it. There's a ballot on WatchWhatCrappens.com, too. We already have had like 13,000 votes, which is so cool. I love that. I love seeing all the activity around it. If you can't make it to the show on February 1st, you can stream it. So go check out the link also on our site. We've partnered with Kiswe to do the streaming.
It'll be lots and lots of fun. You can stream it from anywhere in the world. And we highly recommend that you watch it because it's going to be a super fun show. And then after the crappies are done, we're going to Salt Lake City and to Denver. So a very busy three weeks for us, but it's going to be busy. Deeply rewarding and super fun.
And we can't wait to see all of your faces there or virtually. Yeah, I'm excited. Plus traders, traders on Patreon. So don't forget that too as our bonus episodes.
Yeah, good times. Okay, so we just got through a really rough Real Housewives of New York recap. So I'm so excited to be here for Real Housewives of Beverly Hills. Back to stupidity. I know. I really needed this episode. Me too. Pure fucking stupidity. Oh, my God. This show is so dumb. I love it. It's so dumb. They literally talk about nothing.
And then Kyle's fit about nothing made life worth living. I loved it.
Kyle having a tantrum because she's so caught and she's so wrong and she's so cornered. So she just goes to whatever she knows best. She pulls out a tantrum. I mean, this is what I tune into for Housewives. This is more like it. And it was a much needed salvo after that Roni finale.
Yeah, that was a wreck. Okay, so we start with a brilliant Trixie Monaco song. I mean, Trixie was killing it in this entire episode. Great music. She's putting together, she's putting out some great work this season. But this one is, I leave it to the haters. I never want to be like that. I never want to be like that. I leave it to the haters. Why? Because I'm bigger than that. That's right.
That's right. Now let's see what the ladies are doing in Beverly Hills. Take it away, Sutton. I'm putting on lipstick. Great. All right. I'll sing another verse.
All the imitators trying to be my enemy. I leave it to the haters. I leave it to the haters. It sounds like you're hating on your imitators. So maybe you're leaving it to yourself, Trixie. Think about it.
Let's see what Garcelle's doing. I'm putting on a shoe. Wow. Great. I'm the greatest. They see my face. It's everywhere. What's Dorit doing? And Dorit's talking to her poor friend, Ploy, who probably hasn't been paid in 10 years.
And she's like, today's all about meditation and healing and forming a sisterly bond.
Yeah, so it's kind of like what you need today, right, girl? And she's like, yes, only it doesn't tend to be relaxing with this group of women. Girl.
then we go to boze's and they're setting up she's got a whole staff they're setting up for boze's serenity gathering um so nico comes in he's like boze quick question when the ladies get their robes and the slippers are right under them what if the slippers are wrapped in like ribbon like a big bow i've been working on that all night she's like you know what we should do the waist has the waist is the bow and the slippers are tucked in there he's like
Okay, well, I love that.
Really glad I expended all of this creative energy to be slapped down again. Thanks. I'll be in the kitchen, I guess, making you a curry.
Don't use excess ribbon. We already have straps around the robes. I invented that. Okay, spray, spray, spray. Get the spray on my face, everyone. So poor Nico. But by the way, I did notice that when the robes were laid out, the slippers were below the robes. They were not tucked into the robes. I noticed that.
That was a failure. Heads are rolling. Nico's head is rolling down the hill, probably wrapped in one of those fucking bows he tried to pass off.
So speaking of Bose, Bose herself says, I decided to host the Sisterhood Serenity Soiree because I was inspired by Sutton's idea of sisterhood. And I just want to say a bunch of words that started with sus in the beginning. Sisterhood Serenity Soiree.
Here's the real reason I'm doing this. In the corporate boardroom, sometimes somebody will have a really good idea, but they don't know how to execute it. And we see Sutton's disastrous sister party where she started yelling at everybody and having a fit. And she's like, so now I've got to come and do this mess. You think Microsoft Word invented itself? No. Before that, it was Microsoft Letters.
I came in and I turned them into a word. And there you go. Now it's in everyone's computers.
It used to be called MicroHard. And I said, no, Microsoft, that's more approachable.
Um, so Dorit comes in and, um, and Bose is like, well, I wanted to call you real quickly because Garcelle came over and one thing she brought up that disturbed me is I think there's more to the texting between PK than maybe I thought. Dun, dun, dun. Dun, dun, dun. And then we see Garcelle telling Bose, Kyle read the text.
Wait, I'm trying to think of the right words to express my reaction. Might I suggest, what?
Wow. And it sounded like there's more to it than just, oh, we're sending friendly memes back and forth. And she's like, well, I literally just spoke with Erica, though. And then we see 30 minutes of Erica being like, yeah, she showed her phone.
It's nothing bad. Trust me, I got a lot of more dicks in my phone than she ever had in hers. So don't worry about it, honey.
Well, I wouldn't think it was. It was her reaction that made me go, Sir Bose is like, well, she was standing on business saying she wasn't going to talk about or read the message, right? And in the corporate boardroom, when you say you're not going to read a message, you don't read the message. But guess what? She isn't in the corporate boardroom. She's on the playground.
And I respected her for a moment. But now, now she's going to read the message in the corporate playground. Then to some people, then I don't know why she can't read it to the entire... Room of the conference.
And she's telling us, yeah, there's something to the fact that Kyle chose a moment when I wasn't there and Dorit wasn't there to show that message. And she obviously just wanted to show it to people who were like, oh, it's okay, girl. You didn't do anything wrong. And she goes... Oh, you did. You did.
She chose that moment. She said, I am going to reveal these text messages within the presence of an animatronic rat. And that's what she did. And there was pizza there, too. She knew she'd be insulated, but not for me. Why am I the last one to know when it's about me?
I know, I know. We'll get her. So then we get my favorite musical cue of the night.
We just hear Trixie go, my life is great.
That's the whole song. So then we go to Kyle's house and she's trying to FaceTime Kathy, but Kathy lost her phone. So she has to FaceTime Rick instead.
And Kathy's just like, oh, hi, Kyle. What are you doing inside Rick's phone? Kyle, come out of there.
She's like, oh, my God, Kathy, I am so jealous of your trip. She's like, oh, yeah, well, that's nice, sweetheart. What's going on? She's like, well, I had the biggest fight with Dorit. She goes, again, you got to stop fighting with the people who are close to you. She goes, yeah, but all these years we've been friends and she always loves PK, that PK and I are brother and sister.
And then all of a sudden she decides that that bothers her. Yeah, all of a sudden, I wonder what changed. It's almost like, oh, that's right. Dorit and PK are going through a divorce. Just that small thing.
Yeah, you know, PK and I are like brother and sister of that girl that you hardly know. Oh, okay. And she decides to make it weird about PK sending me memes on Instagram. I mean, are you fucking kidding me, Kathy? So I'm going to go see her today, which sounds like very relaxing, but whatever.
Well, don't let her ruin your day, you know. And by the way, also, everyone in America, buy my tequila. Bye, Kathy. Bye, Kathy. So Kakao's like, yeah, I'm probably just going to ignore her. Do not bring your misery to me.
Yeah, so now they're doing party setup, party setup, party setup. Today I've got a great afternoon planned. I've got a chef that's got a 14-course meal planned. 14 courses. Have you ever? I've got fluffy robes, fluffy slippers, manly hands who can give massages. I mean, this, this is healing. This, this is healing.
I'm also going to have Nico cup some water in his hands and stand very still until a hummingbird lands on his palm. We'll all get to watch. So now they're like, oh, this is nice, everything. Oh, my God. And Nico's like, the queen of the castle, boss. She's like, okay, all right. Is everyone ready? Flower arrangement. Oh, yes, all this stuff. Everything I just talked about. It's all happening.
Okay, who's knocking on my door like it's the police? It's Erika. Okay. She's like, oh, it's me. I'm the one. Don't say the word police around me. It's a little triggering still. I just barely got through 2020.
Yeah, so people start coming. Erica comes. Kyle comes. Jennifer, Grace, Sutton are riding over in an SUV.
And Jennifer is like, you said you heard from Kyle that she's raring to go.
Like, what does she say? Well, you know, she's just so vehement about, well, there's just no takes. We're out of line, et cetera, et cetera. That, that, that. Citra.
Garcelle's like, incriminating.
She goes, uh-huh.
So Garcelle says, after the viper room, I thought we crossed a line that will never be uncrossed. And... The line is literally the line in Kyle's forehead as her name pops out.
Well, I hope they can find a way back. Because right now, it doesn't look like it.
So, I just don't know.
Well, I feel like he was texting her more than memes. And she's downplaying it like he's texting me memes.
No. Memes. No. Memes. Memes. Not memes. No.
No memes. Yes, memes. Memes. And so they're laughing at Jennifer. And Garcelle's like, but she showed the text and read the text.
And what were they?
Well, you know. And then we see her reading it. And Kyle's like, I know you have a lot of friends. But, you know, I'm also here. I'm also your friend if you need me. And I've never repeated anything that you've shared with me. And I never would. I never would be gay.
So that's, that's, this is not just memes. This is, I mean, memes, memes. Oh God, I always get it a little bit wrong.
And Sutton's like, she says, ma'am, she's Canadian driver. I apologize in advance.
So now Dorit shows up at the party and she's like, I don't know how Coyle is feeling coming in today, but truth be told, I don't give a shite. The fact that she showed that text message to the other ladies and not to me, tears me. She's not thinking with the right mind. Sweetheart, you're always telling people to be honest and face things head on. Lead by example.
Dorita's, I love when Dorita's angry in the confessional. So Bo's lines are just popping out of her head.
Be honest.
I know. Niko, can you help me? Put down that hummingbird. Help me out here. So Dorit is like, Niko lets Dorit in and everything. And he's like, oh, hi, hi, hi, hi, hi. And then Bose is like, I'm not going to keep getting up and down anymore. I'm not coming. I'm going to stand for you, Dorit. Actually, I will stand for you. Don't stand up for me. Please don't.
So Kyle says, and there's some awkwardness, and everybody else is in pajamas, but Kyle's in kind of like an evening dress kind of thing.
And Drake goes, oh, yes, hello, hello, everyone. Hello, so serene.
So, Kyle, is this your comfortable place?
so comfy wardrobe kyle and kyle's like um kyle's so mad um it's a great it's in beverly hills that might as well be like you're a slut whore should be like oh such a comfortable wardrobe it's like well babes did say dress code comfy i mean the dress is from 20 2004 so i suppose it's been worn in enough
I thought she looked sexy.
Kyle's like, yeah, actually this dress is very comfortable. And I'm like, not so bored that every day has to be a fashion show for me. Yeah, but you're dressed up. That's the point. Your entire storyline is that you're bored at home this season. Just so you know, we saw you carry a chair through a door. You only just opened the French door and that's because like someone came over to help.
So then in comes Jennifer Tilly, she's like, hello, your house is so gorgeous.
And Garcelle's like, oh, who do we kiss? Hello, where's someone to hold this? Where's Nico? And Jennifer Tilly's like, hello, oh, I'm Canadian. In Canada, we remove our shoes, too. And they're like, oh, good. More hellos. You know, hellos on this show take ten minutes every time someone walks through a door.
All right, everyone. Now, I'm so glad that you're here. I thought it was apropos that as I'm healing, let us all heal together. There, I said it. Now, Jennifer, so we're going into the family room where robes are lying and you can meet the chef and everything. Let's go. Fourteen courses, girls.
So they get the robes, which are not tied up with the robe belt. And he's like, here you go, the robes. I invented these robes. I designed them and I came up with it. I'm going to call them something called bathrobes. Enjoy. And Chris is like, well, I'm already so comfy and healed. This is wonderful.
Here's our amazing chef. Tell them what they're having, boys. So the chef's like, well, we've got some caviar and we've got slices of watermelon. It's the amuse-bouche. He says something like amuse-bouche or something. He says amuse-bouche. And this explains how you're doing 14 courses. Because I was like, who's making 14 courses? It gave me instant agita because of Below Deck.
I'm like, no, not 14 courses. But he's like, here's your second course, watermelon. He's like, wait a minute.
And Jennifer Shelley's like, well, it means amuse the mouth in French, yes. And Booze is like, Garcelle, don't try to say it in a sexy way because Garcelle's like, oh, amuse bouche, huh? Amuse bouche. Amuse bouche. He's like, Garcelle, don't try to say it in a sexy way. I heard you. Because Garcelle's giving him the eye. Because he's cute.
He's like, who's more beautiful? Who is it, chef? Who's more beautiful?
We're all available. Jennifer Tilly's like, we're in heat.
So he's giving them berry antioxidants, then a salad with some watermelon and his amuse-bouche, which is a gift from the chef. Dun, dun, dun. So Sutton's like, oh, Garcelle, we know you speak French. I never, what's amuse-bouche? Listen to her. Listen to her. What is it? Tell me what it is. So Beau's like, leave the chef in the kitchen, please. Thank you, chef. Thank you, chef.
In corporate America, this is the time when we would go outside. So let's go outside like the real corporate raiders do. So they go outside and there's like, you know, like these guys, they're called like hands. Manly hands. What are they called?
Manly hands. With a Z at the end instead of an S. Like manly hands.
manly hands um and garcelle of course knows them she's like oh well talk about it hi boys and uh you know it's gonna be a bad episode for kyle because she literally hired a masseuse team after kyle's nickname Well, neck and shoulders, are you down? He's like, yeah. He's like, I literally do that for my job. And so I was like, I have neuropathy, so I don't feel my feet right now.
And they're really bad, but this might actually help. And they all just sit down.
It was funny because Garcelle knew all of the masseuses.
She's like, oh, hi, Ricky. Oh, hi, all. Hi, Al. Hi, Alan. Okay.
How does Garcelle know every single massage person? And she's like, oh, those hands have been all over this body.
This is the calm before the storm. It's the quiet period before the shouting starts. Don't worry, I own the Simpsons.
This means nothing to me. It's time for a commercial. It's time for a crappin's commercial.
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That's W-A-Y-F-A-I-R.com. Wayfair. Every style. Every home. So, you know, small talk while they're getting stuff. But Garcelle's like, finally, I'm relaxed. I'm ready for a massage. I'm dreaming of beautiful thoughts. Can I speak with you while you're getting a massage, Garcelle? She's like, God damn it. Why?
Well, the other night.
in the veeper room i got a screaming match with quail and when you turned around and asked me dot dot dot dilly dude dilly dude flashback to one week earlier when garcelle goes how are you doing do you mean you genuinely do you do you well i wouldn't have asked if i didn't want to know i mean it's like going up to manly hands and saying just the neck and shoulders am i right who would just ask for that alone right right right
Well, my reaction was far less about you and more about me.
You know, I'm just so lost. She goes, well, stop there, please. I'm just so sorry. I feel so sad for you. It's almost like you're a person about to get a massage and then it's interrupted. And that's a terrible thing to happen to somebody. So I just don't want the kids to have adult trauma. So if there's any insight I can get you, please wait over there while I come up with it.
Please do a internet search for the letter I wrote all of CIA. You can just copy and paste that and send that to whoever you want. Enjoy.
Well, I know that you and I have had some bumps.
Oh, honey, if we'd had some bumps, we might actually get along. Go away. Flashback to 2021. I feel like the past couple of months you've been making lots of jabs. Little jabs at me. Little, let me just sprinkle some water at you. Fibs. Jabs. Fibs. Jabs and jabs. Jabs, jabs, jabs.
Fuck you with that. Jabs. And then 2023.
You just attacked me.
I didn't attack you for you and your privilege. I can't. I can't. I so wish they had thrown in. It's giving bullies.
I know I've done things that have hurt you and you felt like I have not been receptive to hearing you in your soul. And for that, I just want to say I apologize to whatever it was. You don't have to go back and say it because I probably won't listen again. But I know I should apologize right now. So I'm going to.
Well, thank you for saying that. You could have said it in less words, but I appreciate it coming out all the same. Now, please go away. And she's like, well, I'm surprised that Dorit's taking accountability. That has never happened. But I welcome this Dorit. I welcome it. So now Bose and Jennifer are talking about how chic the sunglasses are. And then Bose moves over to Kyle.
And she's like, now, you know, I'm feeling better than I thought I was going to feel. But now a question for you, Kyle. So Garcelle came over yesterday and we talked about this now infamous text, you know, between you and what's his name? The guy who eats chips. So you don't want to read the text. And I'm like, OK, well, it just sounds so scandalous.
I know because, of course, because now I mean, right. And then I'm talking with Garcelle and she's like, oh, well, Kyle and I read the text to everybody. And I'm feeling like, why the fuck didn't she read the text to me?
and Kyle's like well you know I'll tell you exactly what I said I think if I have a good memory memory I think it said like um you have a lot of friends PK but I'm also one of them I'm here if you need me if you want to talk shit about Dorit like I won't tell a soul it's she's like really it's like I know it's like
low-hanging fruit but we all need to eat fruit sometimes so like just talk your shit it won't go to any single person and like you can trust me if you want to send a meme too that'll be good and then in return i'll be like tell me more about to read and so it's like i think a pretty benign text buzz oh oh you just made that sound so like i mean i'm just saying like i you know you can continue to send me funny meme i won't forget the laughing emojis and fuck to read am i right oh
Did I go too far there? Did someone unlock a car? Or like when the ambulances don't want to wake everybody up, so they just go... It's like an ambulance is like, get out of the way.
I just need to...
So Sutton sees them talking and scoots right over. And Sutton's like, you said more than that, Kyle. You said more than that. She goes, what? And she goes, in your text, you said more than continue sending me funny memes. So she goes, um, yeah, I'm talking about that. You just stepped into the conversation.
Yeah, you can't, like, come and do that. She goes, well, I was just getting up off my chair. She's like, well, someone's got to stop making it seem like it was weird. My God, this is, like, really getting dumb. This is, like, so dumb. And Bose is like, in my opinion, when it comes to a conversation that Kyla's having with PK, Dorit needs to know. Tell Dorit.
Yeah, Kyle's like, well, it's so weird that I went to the person who wasn't involved in this and told them instead of the person that was involved so that eventually it would get back to the person that was involved and then everybody can keep talking about it for another few episodes. I'm just so mad about it.
So Kyle's like, I just don't know why Bose is taking this upon herself to tell me that I need to share my messages with the group. She knows nothing of my relationship with Dorit, and she certainly doesn't know my friendship with PK, and I feel like it's inappropriate that she's putting me in this position that it's insulting to me.
Anyway, I just need to go back and watch the Denise Richards season, because that's such a fun season to watch when we made Denise read all her texts on the air, and we forced her to explain her relationship that we didn't really understand with Brandi Glanville. Oh my God, what a fun time in our lives.
Mm-hmm. Where have all the cowgirls gone? Am I right? Why do you think I'm gay? So then Sutton's like, well, no one asked you to pull out your phone, Kyle. You did it. She goes, oh, my God. Why do I owe this to every single person? So now Erica's eavesdropping.
And she goes, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, Sutton, Sutton, Sutton. No, no, no. Let's not do that. Let's not do that. When we start opening people's phones, oh, Jesus Christ. I sent Armie Hammer a picture of chicken meat and told him it was my arm. So, you know, nothing's more embarrassing. I still fucked him. I still fucked him. He's coming back.
I mean, I'm not afraid to open up my phone. Look at this. Erica texted me. I live with a man who's got one foot in the grave and one foot on a banana peel. I mean, wow. Oh, you know what? This is from the wrong person. Nevermind. Wrong show. Wrong show. I mean, what a contrast between Salt Lake City and this show where you have on this show, like,
no we don't do that we don't go into each other's phones and talk like say read the worst text you ever wrote about someone and then read five more okay youth car starting with mary cosby if you haven't said something disgusting and violent in your text take time to compose it now and then screenshot it we'll be reading it a little bit what'd you say make it extra big for lisa
So Kyle's like, I can't take this anymore. I don't want to talk about it. I just don't want to talk about it. So she's like, starts dabbing her eyes, you know, and licking her lips crazily. And Buzz is like, hmm. So now she's upset. So it's like, yeah, I just, I don't really understand that.
Of course you understand. People can make it into something more than something than it really is. I mean, these are my earrings. And now people are saying they belong to some orphans I've never seen before. So that's all I'm talking about. The rest of these women are pressuring Kyle, almost accusing her of having done something wrong.
She has not done anything wrong by communicating with a friend.
I'm like, the way that Erica is trying to, like, pretzel her logic to make it seem like Kyle was not violating girl code, I'm sorry. It is a fail for me.
Well, she's choosing her. She's choosing her team. You know, if it's going to be Kyle versus Dorit, you know, Dorit's the only one who gives her the time of day. But she's herself said that Kyle is the queen bee of the show. So she's going to keep that check coming. So she goes to Kyle. Yes.
There's no. Well, it's also it's also indirect continued case building for herself. Like.
I wasn't giving the grace in 2020 when you guys all attacked me for Tom Girardi. So I'm going to give the grace to Kyle that I never received.
It's like, we gave you the pizza party already. Okay. Relax.
Kyle helped with the pizza party and Dorit did nothing. So, um, so Erica goes to check on Kyle and, um, Dorit's like, well, I was sitting in the sun and I feel like I'm not going to sit in the sun. I'm going to sit over here. But if I'm over here, there's no sun. Where's the sun? I need some sun. Maybe I'll move over there. Oh, the sun. Oh, God, it's too much.
I'm moving over here. The master at work. Dorit, what are the things you think about when you design things like Beverly Beach? Well, I was sitting in the sun and I thought, I don't want to sit in the sun. So now I've decided I'm going to sit over here. Wow. Thank you. Thank you for that insight.
Guys, this is fun. Can we play Trixie's greatest song for the episode, please? My life is gray. Okay, let's go on with the scene. So Erica goes to Kyle and she's like, what's going on, honey? And she's like, I just can't do this anymore. I'm like, I really can't. I've been standing here dabbing my eyes. I'm like, no one's even come over except you. Like, I'm not going to do this.
Like, everyone's trying to make it look like there's something wrong with PK. I just don't get it.
You've done nothing wrong. That's what I said.
All you did was just... I'm not going to be made to do this. Like, I mean, every time we come up and do this, like, we go through this, like, why would I want to fucking be here? I'm wrong to read the text. I'm wrong because I didn't read the text.
Listen, you're never going to satisfy anybody.
Put it back in your mouth.
I explained verbatim what the text said. And now I've got to like show it to the group. Like, how old are we? It's like, Kyle, you're the one who is trying to do like the mean girls, cool mom with your daughters every single episode. So you're literally pulled up a dirty card. You're crying and having a fit. So now the other women are outside and treats like,
Why are they having a conversation about the text message without me? And she says, I don't understand how this text message can become a topic of conversation for everybody but me. Is anyone going to have you spoken? Anyone going to say, hey, have you spoken to Dorit? Have you shared with Dorit? Have you told Dorit?
Have you asked if Dorit is still sitting in the shade or has she moved back to the sun? What about me?
What am I, a child? I have to go to the fucking principal's office?
No, you know, I don't believe in principals or offices. And I don't think that you owe anyone here an explanation, except for Dorit, baby, probably Dorit.
Well, by the way, I don't know where anything, but I'm going to come out here, I'm going to read this, and then I'm leaving. And you know I did nothing wrong, right, Erica? You know. I know, honey. I know. Hey, did you get that picture I just accidentally texted you of a chicken breast? Could you just delete that from your phone?
Oh, I already put some text over and sent it as a meme to PK.
I said, hey, PK, this looks like that time I caught you coming out of the shower. So Kyle says, OK, chicken breasts, a raw chicken breast is PK's body type.
So Kyle's like. All right, I'm going to say something and then I'm leaving because I don't know this all, how this all went wrong, but okay, I'm going to say this. Okay.
Quill, please sit down. No. No. No, I don't want to. I really need to say this. I got to do it. I got to do this. Please just let me say this because I'm going to leave.
I'm trying to get to a good place in my life. Okay. I just want to say the following. I've been in movies with Jamie Lee Curtis. Okay, I'm going to go, guys. I've said it. Come on, Kyle.
I'm fucking leaving, please, okay?
Because I love you and PK and your kid's lady I barely knew and had lunch with maybe twice. It doesn't work out, so I don't talk to her.
But I'm like, you know that I love you. You know that. You know I love you. She's like, I knew, Kyle. And I've been made to feel like I've done something wrong. You know, like sending a text to PK. I said, I'm going to read this one. And that's it. And then Bo said something today that made it seem like it was something weird.
So obviously I'm showing it because it's Bo's fault because I have nothing to hide. I'm going to just read you guys. I'm going to read it.
Kyle, Kyle, do you want a juice box? Would you like a juice box?
If I was there, I would have just thrown a bucket of water on Kyle. Like, what is wrong with you?
Give her a juice box and some Ritz crackers. Give her a snack. Let her sit in the corner. Like, now, do you want to play checkers, chutes and ladders? What do you want, Kyle? How can we make this better for you? God.
So she's like, okay, okay. So it says that he made a joke in April. Okay. And then the next text is not until the day that you guys got separated. And I said, I know you have a lot of friends. I'm also one.
And if you need me, I've never repeated anything you shared with me and I wouldn't. Meaning, meaning, because she knows how that sounds now, you know? So now she's like, should I just not read that part? There was like a long pause where she's like, I can't skip that part because I already read it to everybody else. God damn it, I have to read it.
But meaning, meaning, meaning, I don't mean regarding you. I mean, I think that's what you're taking it as. But I'm not talking about this. I'm talking about this, like production, okay?
so so then we see all the cameras and the camera's like uh hello it's like i was like i mean which i can't take it's real film man we're in production okay bravo bravo bravo scarcell's like i don't get what what her talking to pk has to do with production i mean if you're having private conversation with someone and you want to say i will never share what we talked about with production you'd write with production she didn't say that
I mean, she's sort of right. Not the strongest case, but it is true. She's right. So funny.
Of course, you would write with production. No one else is disgusted any other way. Otherwise, how would you know when it's production? You don't beat around the bush.
That was a double entendre because I still want to talk about last season Kyle also.
So Kyle's like... Well, I'm sorry, but I'm sorry to interrupt you because Giselle, Garcelle, she adds this. She goes, because either way it doesn't look good because obviously it means it was more than memes and jokes, period. I mean, if it's memes and jokes, share them. Production likes to laugh too.
Um, by the way, I was sorry, I got a little distracted because I was looking up something when Kyle was like, guys, so here I am, I'm messaging with PK, okay? And that was in April. And then, like, I didn't even message him until you guys announced your separation. They announced their separation on May 9th, 2024. So, like... You talked in April and I could have been anytime in April.
And then you talked again in May. So it's not like it was like five months went by. You guys talked again. Like you're not proving she's just not making a very good case for herself.
Yeah, that's Kyle, though. She can't make a case for herself. The fun part is just watching her cry and freak out over the shit she caused. So and then she says, yeah, go ahead, man.
i said keep sending memes and i won't forget the laughing emojis because you know he gets mad if you don't respond like i have to respond it wasn't my fault i wrote to him he got mad at me i'm like what now all of a sudden this is pk's fault and she's like oh that's all and that's all i fucking said and i'm done i'm done i'm not gonna be made to feel like i did something wrong okay i loved you and your family even though we were really never very close at all like we really weren't close friends at all as i said on the reunion but
Like, I loved you and your family and I'm done with this shit. I'm done crying over someone that I really don't even know. What's your name again? Doria? What? I don't know. I don't know who this person is. Why am I crying over her?
Quill! I loved you and your family. I'm done with this shit. I'm done with this shit. I'm done. I'm not doing it anymore. I'm not.
And she storms out of the house just like fluffing her hair back. And, wow, they just kind of watch her walking out like, what the fuck is wrong with her? And Moe's clocks it. She's like, the louder Kyle protests and cries about the situation, the more that I know she's wrong.
It's also the more I know that it's time to invent something new called tissues. Nico, write that down. Tissues. Give it to people who cry. So Kyle is like, I am done. Tizzy. That have issues. Meld those together. How are we going to do it? Tizzy issues. Tizzy issues. Nico's like, issue tissues. No, not issue tissues. Shut up, ribbon man.
i'm done i'm not doing this anymore by the way kyle's been done for like 35 minutes on this show i am not doing this anymore everybody has bigger problems and yet this is all that they can focus on okay kyle you're the one who's hyper focused on everyone else's marriages going to and then the moment it comes to you we're doing something wrong all of a sudden it's like oh everyone's focusing too hard she's so hilarious so i was cracking up this whole scene with kyle because she's just standing there in front of everybody going oh
I'm done. I'm leaving. No, I am leaving. But not leaving. And then now she's like, I am leaving. I'm done. But she's still standing there. She's just standing there for the camera. It's like, I'm done. So Sutton just rolls her eyes. And Dorit's like, let me go, Erica.
Well, she's not going to listen to you.
Oh, let me go, Erica. She will, Erica. She will. So now Erica and Dorit follow Kyle. And everyone else is being nosy, you know. So then... The manly hands have been listening to Kyle's meltdown, and one of them goes, that woman was right. She said it would change in a minute, and it did.
That woman, excuse you. That is Oscar nominee Jennifer Tilly, and we see it 30 minutes earlier. This is the con before the storm. You're going to have a lot of memes to send out from this party. I love when staff members, like Ann Slater's staff members, make little comments on these shows. It's my favorite thing.
Yeah. So they come, Kyle and Erica go to Drie.
And Kyle's like, no, no, it's disgusting. Every day to be made to feel like this. Are you kidding me right now? Are you kidding me?
So then back inside, Bose is like, let's go watch. So it's like, it's so dramatic. I want to watch. She goes, let's go Sutton, get up.
so uh they all follow to see what's going on kyle's doing she's back to her classic line are you kidding me first of all take a deep breath okay let's go for a little walk okay i mean literally look at all of us all right look at our age what we're doing all you women in your 50s me at 35 look at us we're too old or you're too old and i'm still a little too young for this sort of behavior
I mean, honestly, everybody should be ashamed of themselves. Seriously, fucking ridiculous.
So Dorit takes her off alone. And it's like, guys, can I have a minute? So they walk off. And every time Kyle runs away, everybody just keeps circling around her to watch her break down more.
So funny.
So she goes, let's just not talk about this for one second. And let's take a deep breath.
So inside, Jennifer's like, hey guys, what trick is this? And Erica's like, well, all of it's been building, the whole thing. Like, oh, she's had enough and I don't blame her. I mean, I get why Kyle's upset. Her marriage is falling apart. Her life is falling apart. Her relationship with the group is falling apart. The doorknobs at her door are falling apart.
At least that's what she says, why she can't open it. Everything's falling apart.
One eye is flittering open and closed again. The veins popping out of her head. One of her hands is bigger than the other one. I mean, the girl's the best. What are you going to do? Isn't it hilarious? The neon sign in her foyer is starting to flicker and die out. Everything's falling apart.
And Garcelle's like, does this scream I'm guilty? Yeah, it does.
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So Doreen is like, Kyle, nothing is going to go away just because you walk away from it. She's like, are you sure? Cause I've walked away from a lot of things. She's like, I'm going to, okay. I'm just going through a lot. Okay. I'm not gonna, I'm not gonna come for a relaxing day and be accosted every fucking time. We were, you know, like we were in a good place.
And then you said to me, listen, things are not great. And like, will you do me a favor? And can you cut off contract, contract with PGA right now? Because if you had said that, like, of course I would have. Okay, of course. I mean, like, obviously PK is like a brother and you'd be asking me to like stop speaking to my own brother. So it's kind of on you for like coming between me and my family.
But like for you, I would have done it. Person I really don't know very well.
And Dorit tells us, well, Goyle, it's a little late because a Goyle's Goyle would have stopped talking to my husband without having to be east. A Goyle's Goyle would have done it the right thing right away.
One of my biggest issues, if not the biggest, is the way PK would speak to me and the yelling at me. It's just, it's a trigger coil.
Yeah, but like, I can't even picture him like, I mean, doing that. You know what I mean? Because he's just so like... I mean, if there was like a sound effect for PK, like walking up a beach, it would be like...
No, you don't understand. He yells in that voice. It's very terrifying. And I used to call him the monster. Like when the monster comes out and I protected him for a very long time because he's not that person. He's not. But he can be that person. And he is with me. So he is that person. But he's not that person. So I can't be sued for saying he's that person. But he is that person.
He's all the people. He's everyone. And no one. He's behind you right now, Kyle. He's right behind you. What? Just kidding.
I can't pass a bowl of sour cream without saying... It's a rough life, Kyle. And so Kyle's like, I mean, like, I don't know what goes on behind closed doors. I always saw Dorit wearing the pants in that relationship. So, like, it's just hard for me to visualize that dynamic. I mean, is Dorit taking advantage of this moment so she can paint a picture of who PK is and he can't defend himself?
I mean, I'm just saying I've never seen that. So, like, then again, I've never seen this side of Dorit either. So, like, well... Oh, wow. So now you're just not going to believe her and you're going to take PK's side and run off and text PK about this later. I mean, this is like this is the base of the problem, Kyle. You're on PK's side. You don't even believe that PK was mean.
How can you not look at everything that PK's look at how PK talks to her on camera and then tell me he's not capable of being a dick off camera. What a shitty fucking person. What a shitty fucking person.
This is shitty. This is from the same person who wants us to believe that when cameras are down, Kathy Hilton is a total, total monster. And yet, now when Dorit is saying, by the way, when cameras are down, PK is a monster. And Kyle's like, I haven't seen that. I mean, I don't think Kyle would appreciate us saying that about Kathy. And I believe Kyle when she says that about Kathy. But...
But Kyle wanted us all to believe that. She was very adamant, like, you have to trust me on this when it's down. And yet she does not extend the same grace to Dorit. But maybe that makes sense because grace time is over, Kyle.
Well, it's also like kind of believing like a victim of something.
Yeah, of course.
I was just like, no, I'm on the man side immediately. You know, it's just fucking disgusting. And let me tell you, also utterly not surprising because it's fucking Kyle. So back inside, Erica's getting her feet massaged.
She's like, are they still talking? Has anybody checked? Go check. Tilly, go look out there. They won't hit you. You're new. Go. You're too rich for Kyle to hit.
Go over. She's like, okay, I'm going to go look. She's like, well, I'm pretty sure that they are still talking or they're dead. So she goes out there and she just looks and turns it around. And she's like, yep, still out there.
Well, obviously, Dorit, we're like both going through a hard time because I don't know if you remember my storyline, but it's a really, really rough, rougher than yours. And like, like we're in that place and we're both going through difficult times separately, mostly because I won't call you because you don't like to speed walk.
So I just want to say that, like, in this moment, I just want to remind you, I'm going through a really tough time. But I also want to say we're having the best divorce of all time. That's going like really well. But right now, I just want to say it's a tough time. Yeah.
Right now, because it benefits me, my divorce is not going better than yours. But it will be back better than yours tomorrow. Okay.
Jennifer comes back. She's like, well, they are deep in discussion and Dorita's gesticulating. And so it's like, oh, God. It could be a while. I died. I died when she's like, oh, God. I'm going to be here all day. She's gesticulating. She's going to blow any moment.
well you know when you write things like you know i'd never share anything you don't you know that just doesn't feel right kyle just well but you're like i mean i'm leaving pk doesn't talk about doesn't think about it like that because no but like he knows what we're talking about he knows we're talking about it just well but you would never say i'd never say it on camera you wouldn't say i'd never repeat anything you just say i would never say anything on camera that's what you would say
but i didn't mean it's about you i mean it's like not about you we're talking about like for sure it's not you like it's like lots of other things but in other words what he shares with you you would never share with me she's like um no like that's not it's not about that though it's like it has nothing to do with you i don't talk about you i only just like make jokes about you and say what's going on with dory and then he tells me but i don't actually talk about you like why are you crazy
And she goes, well, I don't talk about you. Like, he doesn't talk to me about your relationship. And she goes, yes, he does. No, no, he doesn't talk about your relationship with me. She goes, yes, he does, Coyle. About your, I mean, what are you saying? About your relationship? Yes, Coyle. I swear to you, he doesn't. PK shares things with everybody.
So Kyle's like, well, I mean, if you know my character and you have a brain. Yeah, both. And you're a fucking liar. You've always been a fucking liar. You're not a good girl's girl. You're not a good friend to anybody. And, of course, I believe everything that that dodo bird Dorit is saying. I mean, when you're making Dorit 100% correct in an argument, you've really fucked up, Kyle.
Yeah. You really fucked up, Kyle. You really fucked up. As far as we can tell, you're in a feud with one of your sisters at any given time. You three of you can never be friends at all together at the exact same time.
And what this tells me is that, like, at a certain point, I don't know if I trust any of the sisters with being good friends, anyone, if they can't even be good sisters to each other.
So she was like, yeah, I mean, we've talked about things in the past, like about Lisa Vanderpump, the show, like how do you get a chair through a door, et cetera. But my point was, I never repeated any of those things that we've discussed and none of those things have ever been about Dorit. But then we hear Dorit and Dorit's like, PK doesn't pick up the phone to Kyle to discuss our issues.
But after dinner with Mo, when Kyle and Mo used to live together, he'd go back to the house. And I know he would see Kyle. And I know all the conversations they used to have. Kyle would talk to him about her issues with me. And PK would talk about his issues with me. And do you know how I knew? Because PK told me. Because, of course, PK is one of the biggest gossips on this show.
Of course, he came home and was like, here's what Kyle said about you tonight.
Yeah, we've been watching this for eight years on this show, or however long they've been on. Like, from the very first season, it's like, well, by the way, I saw Erika Gerrard is underwear. She was all lack thereof, if you know what I'm saying. I mean, like, that was what PK was built off of that, about gossiping. So of course he's gossiping. Of course he's trying to get the gossip.
Of course he's trying to spread the gossip. So Kyle, she's like, I don't know if Kyle got so used to, dare I say it, lying through her teeth with me. That is second nature.
I'm going to go in and grab my stuff and leave. You didn't prepare to leave? You've been in there threatening to leave for the past 15 minutes. You didn't get your purse?
She's still in her bathroom, by the way. It's going to be a while before she leaves. She has to change back into her comfy clothes. So Dorit's like, this is one of those moments where I don't believe Coyle is being honest to herself. And I think, gee, it's become almost like she doesn't really know how to be entirely real. Which, by the way, coming from Dorit, that's saying something.
Dorit's like an LV falls off of her forehead. So Kyle's like, oh my God, we just achieved exactly what she wanted. Everyone's talking about this now instead of what she did to me, which is her being a good friend to me. And so like had to pull something out of her hat, didn't she? When was this ever about her not being a good friend to you?
about Kathy are you still talking about fucking Kathy because she said one nice thing to Kathy you are ridiculous yeah so Erica's like well Dorit how did it go and she's like well she was very very upset very emotional I would like to I don't know I would like to see us be able to have conversations and it not be about one little wrong move or as I like to call them jabs and then a little big blow up and then I'm done I would like to see us rise above it
Well, I think Kyle feels very misunderstood, like a poor little girl who was never given pizza when it was her time. You know, I get it.
I get it, guys. And so Boze is like, why is Erica jumping in to defend Kyle? I mean, when is Dorit that deserves our support? Kyle's the one who did wrong. Where's the support for Dorit?
You know, everyone, this is a very new type of environment for me because in the positions I've been in, corporate Americans... I've been in lots of positions, girl. Jobs. Hold on one moment. One moment, everyone. Okay. I look at conflict and I try to resolve them immediately because that costs money when you're in the corporate world. Nico doesn't know anything about that. Do you, Nico?
No, he's not talking right now. He's under a stack of towels. Anyway, so I look at Dorit, and I see conflict with you, and I see conflict with you, and I see conflict with you, and I see conflict with Kyle, and the common denominator is Dorit. She's like, oh, bitch. Well, it's true.
I wonder if there's any delicious coffee in the kitchen.
Jennifer is like, I'm just going to go check to see if Dorit and Kyle are still out on the sidewalk. Like, no, Dorit's right here, bitch.
Well, I'm going to say something to Dorit because I really have to do this because we're not going to have a thing. But I just want to just. Well, we know we're not friends. To be continued. OK, well, to be continued. But I want you all to know that we will always be able to sit down and be OK. Agreed. Anything else? No, but I think that's a good start.
Am I going to get a pat on the head or shoulder, anything? Anybody going to congratulate me on that?
Thank you so much. Oh, by the way, such yummy food, by the way. Everything, everything was so good. The sixth course of two peanut M&Ms in a little cup was delicious.
It was actually Dorit who said that. It was like, oh, thanks, son. Yummy food. Delicious. And then Erica's like, um, Dorit, acknowledge what she said. You just said yummy food. She goes, I said I agree. And I also agree with myself that this food is very yummy. And I think we should discuss it more.
I got it.
I got it.
Just fine. Sutton's all simmering over there. Like she just gave some soliloquy about love and peace. Like you barely did anything. Quiet down over there.
So Jennifer Tilly goes, um, I heard agree. If it matters, I would agree.
I such agree.
I such agree. Okay, well, Bozy, this is such a beautiful garden and very handsome men giving us massages. Really lovely afternoon you put together. It's not a success unless someone leaves crying.
So then we go to Kyle's and she's wrapping presents.
So she's like, Sophia, do you have present tape? Anybody?
So she's telling us, I'm still so hurt about what happened at Boza's event. Like, how I, like, cried a lot, and then I cried a lot some more, and then I cried, and then I had to read the text. And, like, it was so hard. It was, like, so hard. And the press, the national press all week has been about this.
They've been saying, oh, yeah, Kyle, all the ladies gang up on Kyle and Kyle had to take a break from filming. And she walks out of a beauty or a massage event this week and she doesn't return for weeks. She's just so upset. And then you watch the show and this is what you're upset about. Kyle, literally nobody did anything to you.
nothing and now here we are watching you give your daughter two boxes of the shittiest donuts in los angeles winchels i mean come on seriously have some self-respect yeah so um it's porsche's 16th birthday everybody i know we're all excited and guess what they got porsche porsche and mo comes and he just keeps going porsche for porsche porsche for porsche porsche
Yeah, so Porsche, we got you a birthday present. It's Porsche for Porsche, and you're going to be able to drive it. I bought it actually from off the hands of Camille Grammer. She was selling it. It actually used to belong to Frazier. Camille, do you want to say anything about this Porsche?
You know what? A Porsche is a car that like drives really fast.
It's a car, yeah. It drives really fast. It's a designer car. You can drive it anywhere. Actually, it might be from Germany. It's from Europe and it's just, it's a beautiful car.
Devastating.
So also he's going to be taking a Porsche to London. Well, they're going to Paris or something. No, they're going to go to either Madrid or Mallorca, but they're going to stop off at London to pick up Porsche's friends. And Fer is like, oh, my God, are you guys going to like party together? He's like, yeah. Who? Me and Porsche? Of course. That's the whole point.
Listen, I lost one child, but I gained a whole new a whole new young adult's dating pool.
So Kyle looks so jealous and she's really upset that she doesn't get to go on this trip. And she's like, hmm. So then they go out, they show the car and everything. And of course, I'm sure we're all thinking like, why are they giving this? How much do those Porsche Cayennes cost? Probably like it's a lot, right?
Was it a Cayenne? I couldn't tell if it was a Cayenne or the Macan or whatever those are called. Macan. I don't know. The Cayennes are expensive as fuck. Huh? Let's see. Porsche SUV.
There's another type of Porsche SUV. Yeah.
Yeah, there's a cayenne, the macan, and the, I don't know. I think the cayenne's the bigger one, and the macan's the smaller one.
Whatever it is. And then there's one being a Honda fucking Civic, if you ask me. Come on now.
And then we see clips of the happy family and people, other kids getting their cars and Christmases. And Kyle's like, it's just really strange for me. And then they all pile in to take a ride in Porsche's new car. And then we go to Garcelle's beach house.
My life is great.
Sorry, I'm still scrolling through all the flashbacks of the excessive gifts that Kyle and Mauricio have given their children. Kyle's rich, he's nice. He's rich, she's rich. Okay, so Garcelle is trying to fix a chandelier and she winds up breaking it because she just decides to snip off parts of it and all the seashells fall off. She's like, oh no, no, no. And Sutton shows up.
Now, this is a true friend because it's not like driving from Bel Air to a beach house in Oxnard is like a 10 minute drive. That's that's an hour at least, if not 90 minutes.
Yeah. So she comes over and she brings her little dog, June Carter Cash. And, you know, the dogs are playing and stuff. And so they start talking about Kyle storming out of the party. And we see clips of it. I'm done with this. I mean, I'm so done. Can I have a glass of wine? Okay, yeah, I'll just have it right here. That was good.
I'm done. Stop looking at me. Stop talking to me. Stop touching me.
You know what? This is real dumb. The text gets riled up every time. You know, the text thing feels like it's a lot more than it needs to be. Like, what do they say? Thou protest too much. What's the other thing they say? No.
Yeah, that's not the saying, but nice try. And you're an actor. Come on, ma'am. You missed the doth. So Sutton was like, well, the bigger part now for me is that she thinks it's okay to storm out and leave this group because she thinks she's above it. And I do not appreciate that. And I'm going to talk to her about this because no one is above this.
I'm like, oh, you have stormed out more than anybody. But that's kind of her point is that when she storms out, she gets in trouble. And then we see a clip of her storming out of Magic Mike and Kyle being like, You can't just be offended and just walk away. No, she said, you can just be offended and walk away. I mean, instead of making a big scene, she goes, but what did I do? I walked away.
And now you're yelling at me. She goes, well, yeah, but your walking away was like a little bit excessive. And then Kyle makes three walkouts in one episode.
Yeah, exactly. So Sutton's like, wait a minute. How come you get to act like that? You get to leave. You get to cry. You get to be all crazy. But if I do that, that's not allowed. You know, she was so inconsiderate. And Garcelle's like, and she tried to shame us, saying shame on you ladies at our age. Doesn't she know age is a four-letter word in Beverly Hills?
Well, Sutton, strike. I'm not going to bow. Not Richards.
And now Erica goes over to a place called Biologique Recherche, which is like research. I don't know, like research bio, I don't know, whatever it is. Biological research. Biological research. Well, I'm intrigued to see what these scientists are going to find.
She's like, hi there, I'm Erica. Could you tell me what whales are made out of? Didn't think so. I got a free ice cream.
And she's filling out a form, and it says, have you... Okay, let's see what this says. Have you undergone any cosmetic surgery?
If yes, specify. Not enough space. Not enough space. So Dorit comes, and Erica's like, well, we're supposed to relax, but that didn't happen, so here we are.
So they go get some facials, and Dorit's like, Erica, the last few months, I've been looking in the mirror going, ooh, stress just does not. I mean, it takes a tool on your face.
You know what they say? That if you say candy man three times, a man comes into your mirror? Turns out it's PK, I found out the hard way. God, be careful looking at yourself in the mirror when you're going through hard times.
He's a horrible monster. He looks in your mirror, crawls through it, and eats all the candy in your house.
And then, before he slits your throat, he looks you in the face and goes, Ladies and gentlemen, Berlin. Like that's supposed to help the situation. Every breath I take.
I didn't mean it, actually. I didn't even know I had that power. Go away, Berlin.
They're the only band that shows up in your mirror unasked for. So... So she's telling us, listen, I love Erica.
And I've come to realise through everything that I don't need a lot of friends. I just need the right friends. So now it is, was it Bose's wellness party with all my friends?
Her not sticking up for me, or at least saying, coil, even in private. That wasn't very cool. That's hurtful, coil. And so she's like, so... Durga, let's chit-chat. Let's chit-chat for a bit.
Yeah, so she's like, yesterday was intense. Is this the part that you just read? Yesterday was intense. It was very too much. Is that what you just read? Was that what I just recited out loud?
I don't remember. Well, tell me about yesterday. Yes, you're correct. You're on the correct line, Ben. Go ahead.
Well, if you're going to ask me about yesterday, let me tell you something. Yesterday was intense. I don't know if you saw, but I was sitting in the sun and then I moved to the shade.
I think Coyle was suggesting what it means, but I think it's a coop-out. She's like, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Don't bring up cops around me. I did it. I said coop-out. I don't like cops. Well, I'm just saying it was a coop-out. All right. It was a coop-out. That's fine. I can deal with chickens. They give us eggs.
Well, when she said I will never repeat what we talk about or repeat what we talk about, this is plain and simple. About me and nothing else. Nothing else.
You really think that? Well, I don't believe for a second that you don't believe that. Well, you want me to be truthful? Yes, I want you to be truthful. Well, it could be played out in both fucking ways, Dorit. What do you mean it could be played out? Well, it could be as innocuous as I would never talk about anything we've discussed.
Well, she's talking to my husband. What do you think she's talking about? Well, she presumes that it's you, but I don't know for sure. I mean, what the fuck do I know, you know? Erika, this is not a court of law, thankfully for you. You're damn right on that one, girlfriend. But the point is, I'm not going to jump to assumptions.
I need more proof. I need more proof.
I'm not going to jump to assumptions. So therefore, I'm just going to assume that Kyle is innocent. Exactly.
Exactly. So she's like, Dorit may not need proof, but I do. Because listen, whatever you think, I was married to a trial lawyer for over 20 years. And guess what? He taught me a few things. You gotta have proof. Erika, have you seen my pocketbook? I told you I was married to a lawyer.
I'm the victim here. Listen, even better.
Listen, I'm not a lawyer, but I play one on TV. And actually, that's not true. I'm not a lawyer, but I'm in a musical where there is a lawyer. And on top of that, I used to be married to a lawyer. And on top of that, I love watching Judge Judy.
Hmm.
Costly. Stealing lipstick from a victim? Priceless. Erica, why are you doing American Express commercials? Massacred, you dumb bitch.
Okay, but look, I know you. You're very shrewd. You're very smart. But I think when it comes to Coyle, I don't think you call it like you see it. I think you tend to feel like you need to protect her. She was like,
What? What are you talking about? Why would I need to protect her? Hold on one second. Yes, Kyle, I would love to go on a yacht with you. Okay. Anyway, what were you saying?
Erika's defense of Coyle is actually a public thing. I know Kyle is a friend of her, but so am I. And I've never, never known Erika to be afraid of anyone, but when it comes to Coyle, there's no other way to put it.
She's scared.
For me yesterday, it felt not nice when I heard you say over and over, Kyle did nothing wrong. And then we have flashbacks of Erica saying, I know you did nothing wrong. You did nothing wrong, Kyle. You did nothing wrong, Kyle. So Dorit's like, are you saying she did nothing wrong? Like, you're so sure of it. You're not so sure of that, are you, though?
I don't know. I feel like we need to bow out of both these friendships so you guys can work it out. I'm done with this. You know, it's bullshit. I can't have these kind of conversations where I have to side with either one of you. I'm not going to do it.
Well, I don't want you to side with me. I want you to cool it like you see it.
Well, I see both ways. I just said that. I mean, who gives a fuck, really, at the end of the day? At least we're not talking about the earrings. So just keep fighting, you two. big in the middle. I don't need to be in the middle. These two women need to work out their problems together. Love you both. You guys take it from here.
Well, let me ask you a question.
If you knew it was true, are you going to be okay with it?
I don't even know what we're talking about anymore. God damn it. God, you ruined the facial. Fuck. Martin Lawrence is going to try and cover me with a ficus next time he comes over.
And that's where it ends. So we're going to see. But I think that Kyle was cornered and she had a little tantrum. So that way she could be like, you don't know how hard it is for me right now. And then she was able to storm out and not really face the face of the fire.
Yeah, exhausting but hilarious. I mean, I'm loving the season of Kyle just trying to storm out and cry in every episode. It's so funny. It was so funny. Especially with her twitching and her lips all wonky from whatever work she just got done. You should know better to get this work done when you're filming. What the hell? But yeah, it's a fun season.
Yeah. Well, thanks, everyone, for being here and see a bunch of you in San Francisco and San Diego. And next week, we still got some Southern charm coming up this week. So stay tuned. And again, Salt Lake City is going to be coming out this weekend after we record up in San Francisco and San Diego. Thanks, everyone. Bye. Bye. Watch what crappins would like to thank its premium sponsors.
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Welcome to the Offensive Line. You guys, on this podcast, we're going to make some picks, talk some s**t, and hopefully make you some money in the process. I'm your host, Annie Agar. So here's how this show's going to work, okay? We're going to run through the weekly slate of NFL and college football matchups, breaking them down into very serious categories like No Offense.
No offense, Travis Kelsey, but you've got to step up your game if Pat Mahomes is saying the Chiefs need to have more fun this year. We're also handing out a series of awards and making picks for the top storylines surrounding the world of football. Awards like the He May Have a Point Award for the wide receiver that's most justifiably bitter. Is it Brandon Ayuk, T. Higgins, or Devontae Adams?
Plus, on Thursdays, we're doing an exclusive bonus episode on Wondery Plus, where I share my fantasy football picks ahead of Thursday night football and the weekend's matchups. Your fantasy league is as good as locked in. Follow the offensive line on the Wondery app or wherever you get your podcasts. You can access bonus episodes and listen ad-free right now by joining Wondery Plus.