Tony Mantor: Why Not Me the World
Lady Miranda: Harmonizing Inclusivity and Autism in Music – Navigating Performance, Relationships, and Societal Norms with Resilience and Insight
Wed, 12 Mar 2025
Send us a textLady Miranda shares her journey as an autistic artist navigating the music industry while managing sensory overload and performance challenges. Through her experiences, she emphasizes the importance of understanding and acceptance of neurodiversity in society.• Being an autistic artist comes with unique challenges • Travel can induce sensory overload and anxiety • Performance preparation is crucial for managing stage anxiety • Meltdowns can occur due to stress or overstimulation • Late diagnosis in adulthood is common in women • Family support often lacks understanding of autism • Advocacy for changing societal perceptions of autism • Future aspirations include education and workforce inclusivity initiativeshttps://tonymantor.comhttps://Facebook.com/tonymantorhttps://instagram.com/tonymantorhttps://twitter.com/tonymantorhttps://youtube.com/tonymantormusicintro/outro music bed written by T. WildWhy Not Me the World music published by Mantor Music (BMI)
Chapter 1: Who is Lady Miranda and what is her musical journey?
Hopefully, you gain more awareness, acceptance, and a better understanding for autism around the world. Hi, I'm Tony Mantor. Welcome to Why Not Me The World. Today I have the pleasure of hosting Lady Miranda, a multi-award winning singer-songwriter who excels in multiple genres. She is dedicated to fostering a positive and inclusive music community.
Additionally, she shares her insights on autism and her personal journey as an autistic singer. Thanks for coming on.
Sure.
Tell me a little bit about yourself and what you're doing now.
I'm a multi-genre artist. I've won multiple music awards. I write my own music. I write the lyrics. I'm working on a new album right now, so that should be coming out early next year. I'm excited about that.
Yeah, that's great. It's always nice to have new music coming out. When you're performing and recording, do you prefer any particular style?
I do a pretty varied amount. I tend to like to mix genres.
Okay. All right. What's your performance schedule look like overall?
I didn't go on the road as much this year because I took some time to travel through Europe. I just got back December, maybe three weeks ago.
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Chapter 2: How does Lady Miranda manage sensory overload while traveling?
Yeah, everything bothers me. I have sensory issues. When you're navigating the airport, it gets really crowded. Depending on whether or not you're familiar with the airport, I can get overwhelmed just trying to figure out where I'm at and where I'm going. Sometimes people are helpful, sometimes they're not, but depending on your timing, you don't always have a lot of time to get additional help.
And so that's a challenge. Unless you need a wheelchair, they don't really meet you at your gate or at the desk or help guide you. I always make sure that I'm there at least two hours ahead of time so I have time to find where I'm supposed to go and then can settle in from there.
I can just imagine the airport has overwhelmed me several times. So when you're performing, how does that affect you? You have the audience there, a lot of outside interference and people getting ready for all that, for the show and everything. How do you handle that?
I think before I'm going to go on, I have to mentally prepare myself. I probably don't socialize as much. Not that being autistic, we socialize a lot to begin with, but I probably even more so keep to myself prior to performing and then again afterward.
just because even though I've performed before and I'm used to doing my songs and getting up in front of people, I still get like that a little bit of sensory overload and I have to bring myself back down from that. So a lot of times I'll leave the room and get some air or make a bathroom trip. I have to do things beforehand to make sure that I'm not going to stress out about something.
I have to make sure I've eaten and had water because my brain will start to freak out about the smallest things if I haven't taken care of myself. And so it just requires additional steps to make sure that I've done everything that I need to do as far as my basic needs so that when I'm performing, I'm not thinking about that.
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Chapter 3: What strategies does Lady Miranda use for performance anxiety?
I get that. What are some of the small things that can build up that could affect you before the show?
Too many people trying to talk to me. I've gotten used to it because being in the music industry, you get used to talking to other musicians and people, but sometimes you constantly get stopped. A lot of people don't realize that all those little interactions take more mental space for me.
Sometimes that can give me additional anxiety because I'm trying to be sociable, but at the same time, I need to be ready to perform. So it's really a fine balance. It's nice when I can go somewhere where there's a back room or something that I can go into beforehand and be by myself where other people can't find me. Not to sound mean because I like people, but it can be a lot.
Sure, I understand that. A lot of hustle and bustle going on before a show. Now, do you have a band or do you perform solo?
I'm a solo artist, so I normally perform with my tracks. I have performed with live bands locally before. I've done some guest performances and I've done the live band scene before I started working on my solo career. So I am used to that scene as well. It's a little bit more sensory overload for me with a live band, but I have done it.
Okay, when you're on stage and you're doing a live thing, you've got three or four musicians with you, what goes through your mind? You're listening to the sound, you're listening to the band, you're trying to make sure that everything's just right because you're trying to get your music out there for people to hear.
What goes through your mind during that process and how do you contain it so you can put out the music that you know you can do and you can be proud of?
I have to really block out a lot of things around me. So provided that the people playing the instruments are on key, because if they're off key, that does something to my brain and throws me off. So it's really important that everybody's in tune. but I have to block out everything else.
Because I love music so much, I can listen to the music and block everything else out to where I almost lose track that there's even an audience.
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Chapter 4: How does Lady Miranda handle post-performance interactions?
I probably don't move around on stage as much with a live band just because I'm more focused on the live music and blocking out the other distractions. It's harder for me to multitask at that point, singing and moving across the whole stage. So I tend to stay in one spot a bit more with a live band. So there's a lot of adjustments I have to make.
Yeah, that's a very, very good plan. And the main thing is it works for you. What about after the show? You've got the fans coming up to you. They want pictures. They want autographs. That can be very hectic as well.
It is. And I think that's why right after a performance, I tend to take a little break and I need to go somewhere that's more quiet, usually outside or the bathroom and take a few minutes to decompress. And then of course, after performances or shows like that, I pretty much, I don't go to a lot of after parties. If I do is for a very short period of time.
And then I get to a point where I'm like, get me out of here. I've gone to some of the award shows where I'll go to the after party and I'll get to the point where I'm like, okay, get me out of here. I will leave before anybody even knows I'm gone. And I just disappear.
I totally get that. I've been to a lot of after parties and I'm with you. As soon as I can get out, I do.
I don't mean to be rude by not saying goodbye, but I'd rather get out faster than risk having a meltdown because I'm too overstimulated.
Yes, I totally get that completely. I'm glad you brought that up. What do your meltdowns look like now? You've gone through them, you've aged with them. Do you know they're coming? Can you feel them coming on?
I can tell when they're coming on, depending on the situation. Sometimes you can get yourself away from them and sometimes you can't. It really just depends. As far as music is concerned, usually I can be like, you know what, I got to go. And just take off. Because a lot of people don't understand what goes on behind a meltdown. And they often take it as like I'm having some weird overreaction.
And it's not really something I can control. And so I'll start to feel this buildup of anxiety. My meltdowns usually look like me panicking. I tend to, I think, sound like I'm getting a little hysterical or like I'm raising my voice. I cry a When I get in full-blown meltdown mode, I cry. So if the tears are coming out, it's too late. I'm already past that threshold.
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Chapter 5: What are Lady Miranda's experiences with autistic meltdowns?
I think that really depends. I know that something that can help when you're having a meltdown is having supportive people around you or a supportive environment. If people understand you're autistic and something is triggering you, having someone help calm you down is helpful.
When you don't have that, it takes longer because you have to pull yourself out of the meltdown enough to self-soothe, which is tricky. People talk a lot about depression and how a lot of times people can't help themselves out of depression. It works the same way. It's really hard to help yourself out of a meltdown.
Depending on if you keep having triggers come at you while you're having a meltdown, that can prolong the meltdown. So it varies depending on the situation. If I'm able to leave once my meltdown starts, I calm down much faster, obviously.
Okay, that sure makes sense. How old was you when you was diagnosed autistic?
I was actually diagnosed late in life as an adult, which is actually very common for women. We present differently. And since we don't present the way boys do, there's not good criteria for diagnosing females. Right now, the criteria is more male-focused based off of the signs that they show. There's a lot more research out now about females.
I was an adult, and it was a very extenuating testing experience.
Okay, that makes sense. And you're right about the females. They do mask a lot more than the males. What led you to get a diagnosis?
It was recommended to me by a group of psychologists because even though I've been able to work in the same area for many years, staying in one position for longer than a year and a half to two years has always been very difficult. I deal with extreme boredom, so extreme to the point where You build up a lot of anxiety going to work.
I would get so extremely bored I'd want to cry, like physically cry. I was also having some depth perception issues. I went to speak to someone about it, and they asked me a lot of questions. They asked if I would be willing to do this lengthy questionnaire interview process. It was recommended by a team of psychologists that I get tested or evaluated for autism.
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Chapter 6: Why was Lady Miranda's autism diagnosed in adulthood?
And then, of course, it meant that I had a long road ahead of me of learning how to not mask so much and how to be myself and how to manage all the things that were difficult for me that I didn't really know why before. And now I do.
That makes sense. I spoke with a lady. She didn't get diagnosed until she was in her late 40s. Then when she did, same as you, she looked back and everything made total sense to her.
Yeah.
She's a musician such as yourself. She does a one-woman show. She told me that once she had figured it out, once she got it all together, that the next 10 years were the best, most productive years she'd had. As it turned out, it was the best thing that she ever did by getting diagnosed because it changed her life.
Yeah, I was diagnosed in my 30s. And in a lot of ways, it has made some areas of my life easier to understand. I think the hard part now is getting other people to understand. And that's always the challenge because... People have this strange misconception that I can learn to be different and I don't have that skill set.
I spoke with another guy over in England. He's six foot one, 225 pounds, looks fit. He says that when he tells people that he's autistic, they don't believe him. He made a great analogy. He said, If I told them that I had cancer, they wouldn't question it. But yet I tell them something very personal like this about his autism, and they still don't believe it.
Yeah. And I get that all the time. I go, oh, you don't look autistic or you don't seem autistic. And I'm like, what is that supposed to look like?
Absolutely.
And the misconception, because there's different levels of autism and I'm considered high functioning, the misconception is that because I'm high functioning that I should just be able to navigate the world as is. High function is a misrepresentation. I'm high functioning in some areas, sure. But in other areas, not so much.
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