I used to run to relationships as a way to distract myself from my own fear of being alone.I was convinced I was never going to be worthy enough to be loved by someone else. it was after I accepted my irrational fear as a possibility that I finally started to live life on my terms.ask yourself if you're dating someone because you like them and who they are, or are you just entertaining a person to help you forget about the work you still need to do?sending you lots of love and peaaaaaaace!https://stan.store/thezurkieshow
Why do we desire relationships so intensely?
Why do you want a relationship so bad? What is so bad about being alone? I get it. I get it. Maybe you see your friends, everyone on your campus, at your school, holding hands, giving each other forehead kisses or whatever. And you're thinking, man, me and who? But why can't that just be you? Like, why can't you just give yourself the same love that somebody else would give to you?
Aren't you worthy of that? Maybe you feel that that's not the case and that a relationship is really what you want. You want to prove yourself to somebody else. You want to prove that you can do it. But why do you need to prove that? I think we do not ask the question enough, why do you want it? And this causes us to get in some bad situations. It did for me.
I loved the optics of being in a relationship in theory. I loved the idea that somebody could give me attention, somebody could love me, even though I didn't even know what love meant. That, you know, somebody who was good looking and who seemed nice was in my life and could share a $60 Chili's date with me. Yeah.
But when I actually realized that all of those reasons weren't conducive of like how I viewed myself and actually like I didn't really like who I was and I was trying to cope by seeking attention on other people. I realized that the reason I wanted a relationship was not a good one. It wasn't. And it all kind of depends on what you believe a relationship should be.
I think it should be an addition to your life. I don't think your soul existence is spent just being in a relationship all the time. No, in fact, I believe it's important that you learn about yourself in your lifetime and that you figure out the things that you like. And having a relationship is like the icing on the cake. It's like, awesome. I did that and more.
Because every time I've been in something that was devoid of anything real, man, it brought me back to this question. Why do I want this? And it's such a weird feeling when you have spent three, four months with a person and you wake up one day and you just look at yourself and you're like, I don't know. You look at them and you're also like... I don't know if I like, I don't know if I like them.
It's a really weird feeling. And I think it stems from a lack of honesty and maybe a little bit of ignorance. Maybe you're naive. You don't know. Sometimes you have to go through a few Relationships that seem genuine where you know, maybe you asked yourself. Why do I want this?
Well, this is good and it's good for me and I haven't had anything good in a while and that gives you comfort in making a decision, but Is that really why you want it Because I think a relationship takes a lot more work than we realize I think when you actually really like somebody and you like them to a point where you realize that the flaws are going to be flaws and they're going to be there.
And both of you have to work with each other's flaws and you have to accept each other flawed. But I think a lot of us, we meet somebody, our reason for why we want it is more selfish than it is, you know, kind of
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