BUY THE BOOKS! "The Power of Regret: How Looking Backward Moves Us Forward," by Daniel H. Pink, published by Penguin Books is available wherever books and audio books are sold: "Oprah's The Life You Want: Becoming Unstuck Journal" published by Oprah Daily, featuring exercises inspired by Daniel Pink’s "The Power of Regret," is available here. "What Happened To You? Conversations on Trauma, Resilience, and Healing" by Bruce D. Perry and Oprah Winfrey is available where ever books are sold. In this episode of The Oprah Podcast, Daniel Pink, the New York Times bestselling author of seven books, explains how we can use our regrets to transform our future. For his latest book, "The Power of Regret: How Looking Backward Moves Us Forward," Daniel collected regrets from more than 26,000 people in over 130 countries. He shares insights with Oprah from his research - including what he believes are the four core regrets and why people usually regret the things they didn’t do more than those they did. People from around the country join via Zoom to ask Daniel about how to move forward from their deepest regrets. Explore Rejuvenation Home Furnishings | Visit the Rejuvenation Website: https://www.rejuvenation.com Subscribe: https://www.youtube.com/@Oprah Follow Oprah Winfrey on Social: https://www.instagram.com/oprah/ https://www.facebook.com/oprahwinfrey/ Listen to the full podcast: https://open.spotify.com/show/0tEVrfNp92a7lbjDe6GMLI https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-oprah-podcast/id1782960381 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
What is the power of regret?
Okay. Show up and go to the funeral. And that is how looking backward moves you forward because when you're able to take whatever it is that is the regret and turn it into something meaningful for you. Yeah. Well, we spoke to some people who are experiencing regret right now, and Tanya is one of them, and she joins us from the Bronx. Tanya, hi. Tell us what's going on.
Hello. Hi there. Hello. How are you? Good to see you. Thank you so much, Ms. Winfrey, for having me, and Daniel, what a pleasure it is to meet you.
Oh, fantastic.
Virtually. You know, it's very interesting. When I think about the word regret, because I've done so much work on myself, I think I think about when I was young, when I was 16, between 16 and 21, I guess a nicer way to put it, I was boy curtsy. And I lost my virginity. in my opinion, well, I think probably across the board, too soon. I don't know what was happening with me, but it was complex.
My dad was not at home. I'm not blaming that on that, but my life was definitely... just going through things that I couldn't explain. And I think that was an outlet for me.
In hindsight, as a 52-year-old woman now, when I look back, I definitely say to myself, gosh, I wish I would have just saved myself for someone who I loved, someone like my spouse that I'm with now, someone who I can talk to, someone that I know is hearing me, there for me, Just accepting me as I am, that would be my biggest regret.
I think this is so interesting, Tanya, because you have been with your spouse for how long now? I have been with my spouse this February, 18 years. 18 years. And is it something your spouse has brought up to you? Like, I wish you'd been a virgin when we married? No. Never. I thought it was interesting, too, and I'm sure, you know...
You grew up in, you know, I'm 20 years older than you, practically. But I also grew up in an era where if you liked boys, there was no discussion other than you can't date until a certain age. And if you showed any interest in boys whatsoever, you were considered boy crazy. And I noticed that you used that term to describe yourself. And I was thinking, that's not a term you came up with.
That's a label somebody gave to you. And... That's what you're carrying. That's part of what you're carrying. Daniel, what do you want to say to Tanya?
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