Ever wonder how some women just always get what they want? It’s not luck, it’s not hustle, and it’s definitely not because they’re better than you. It’s because they’re moving through the world differently. Hilary breaks down the 8 micro habits of women who seem to have it all: love, money, success, and opportunities. In this episode, she gives you the cheat codes you can adopt for yourself! From keeping your word (especially to yourself) to protecting your energy like it’s your job, this is your no-BS guide to becoming magnetic to what you want. We’re talking about unapologetic boundaries, unshakable self-trust, high-vibe thinking, and what it actually means to take radical responsibility for your life. And the final habit? It’s the secret sauce. The one most people miss—but once you get it, everything changes. Episode Highlights: Saying no without an apology Keeping promises (especially the ones you make to yourself) Radical responsibility (no more waiting to be saved) Embodying abundance like it’s a lifestyle, not a mantra And the real magic: acting like you already have it all Episode Breakdown: 00:00 Why Some Women Always Get What They Want 01:59 Habit 1: Protect Your Energy 05:34 Habit 2: Speak with Clear Boundaries 07:09 Habit 3: Own Your Worth 10:20 Habit 4: Focus on What You Do Want 13:19 Habit 5: Keep Promises to Yourself 15:38 Habit 6: Radical Self-Responsibility 19:08 Habit 7: Embody Abundance 24:34 Habit 8: Be Her Now 29:09 Practicing Receiving What You Want 30:02 How to Start Getting What You Want Today Ready to stop spinning in self-doubt and start showing up like the woman who already has what she wants? Then hit play. 🔗 Want to do the identity work Hilary mentions? Check out her Daily Journal: https://hilarysilver.com/journal/ To take advantage of Hilary's exclusive 40% savings on sheets, towels, pajamas, and more, visit www.cozyearth.com and use the Promo Code: HILARY
Chapter 1: Why do some women always get what they want?
Does it ever seem like some women just get everything they want? The love, the success, the money, the opportunities. It's like things just always work out for them. Well, it doesn't just seem like it. It is actually happening. But I promise you this, it is not luck. and it's not because they are working harder than you and it's definitely not because they're better than you.
Chapter 2: What is the first micro habit of successful women?
It's because they're moving through the world differently. So today I want to share with you the eight micro habits of women who always seem to get what they want so you can start showing up in your life this way too. And make sure to stay till the very end because I'm saving the most unlikely and surprising one for the last. Hi, it's Hillary. Welcome to the
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Okay, so let's get into it. There is definitely a way of being in the world that attracts what you want. And the women who seem to always get what they want and the things just always seem to work out for them, they know this and they operate in the world like this. And the difference is their presence. It's what they think and how they feel and what they believe about themselves.
And this translates into their behaviors. And it's a vibe that is just truly magnetic. So let's break it all down to micro habits. So habit number one, they don't give just anyone access. One of the biggest shifts that I had to make myself and that I teach all my clients is this, be discerning. Be discerning with who gets access to you.
Chapter 3: How do clear boundaries contribute to success?
These women who always get what they want, they understand that their time, their energy, and attention is a valuable and finite and highly desirable commodity. And they don't make themselves available to everyone. And they don't make themselves available to just anyone. It's not just doing this, but it's knowing it. in your soul, in your very being that makes the difference.
Believing this about yourself is where it all begins. And then that translates to the behavior. You must know that your time, your heart, your concern, your thought, your capacity to give of yourself is so valuable that you carefully curate the inner circle of those who get access to it. You don't just hand out a backstage pass to everyone.
Chapter 4: Why is owning your worth important?
For me, I will do anything for those people who are closest to me. But if someone I hardly know or don't have a close relationship with is asking to pick my brain about business or someone who wants my two cents about their relationship, that's a no. It's not because I don't care about them. It's just that I care more about me.
It is not my job to hand over my hard-earned wisdom, my years of investing time and money into developing myself in every way as a skilled clinician, as an eight-figure business owner. So I don't have to hand that over to anyone for free just because they're asking. I value myself and I know my worth. So I know this may be hard for some of you who just want to help everyone all the time.
And it's kind of the bleeding heart do-gooder mentality. Bless you for that. But no, this is pick me energy. It's scarcity energy. It's seeking energy. And it's let me help you so I can feel good about myself energy. The women who always get what they want take good care of themselves and they gatekeep access to them. So this isn't about not caring.
Chapter 5: How can focusing on what you want change your life?
It's about valuing yourself and not being fully available to anyone and everyone. It makes it easier to show up more fully, freely, and wholeheartedly to the people who have earned their way in. So when these women show up, they show up all in and fully available to those who are in their innermost circle, those who actually deserve to be there and have that access.
This leads me to habit number two, yes means yes and no means no. Women who always get what they want mean what they say and say what they mean. They communicate truthfully, openly, and directly. They are fully expressed, meaning they don't hold back their truth to please or avoid conflict. They are just simply honest. It's hard to believe that this is rare and special, but it is actually.
Women who get what they want don't say yes out of obligation or because of shoulds. And they don't lie and agree to something they don't agree with or sign up for something they don't want to do. So when they say yes, it's because they mean yes. The yes is an authentic yes. It's in full alignment with her values or her priorities. It's authentic.
Chapter 6: What promises should you keep to yourself?
And when they say no, they say no without an explanation or an apology. This means she is trustworthy. You can trust her. She isn't lying to make you happy. And then you are wondering if she really wants to be there or if she really means it. Ultimately, what this says about her is that she belongs to herself, is strong in herself, and is in full integrity.
This is a high vibe way of moving in the world, and that is magnetic to the things that you want. Things just start coming to you when you are in that emotional state and in that vibrational energetic level. Habit number three, they believe they are worthy of receiving that which they want. Women who get what they want don't wonder if it's possible. They assume that it is.
Chapter 7: What does radical self-responsibility look like?
They know who they are, and they have big dreams, and they believe they are worthy of every single one of them. They don't have this inner naysayer running the show. There's no nasty inner critic keeping them small, doubtful, and holding back.
That means that they're not carrying around the weight of imposter syndrome, always looking over their shoulder, questioning themselves, or waiting for someone else to discover that they really truly don't have what it takes. This means that they don't get stuck in research mode, what an old mentor of mine used to call getting ready to get ready to get ready.
Like sitting on the bench in full uniform while everyone else is out there on the field playing, having fun, living life, winning. but then what if I get hurt? What if I mess up? Maybe I need to practice more. So you sit back down again. Stand up, sit down. Stand up, sit down. Up, down, up, down.
Meanwhile, life and your dreams are passing you by while you sit there ruminating and chasing your tail. I call it sitting and spinning. sitting and spinning in your head, ruminating, doubting yourself, questioning yourself, second guessing yourself, not knowing if you have what it takes, not feeling worthy of getting what it is that you want, questioning yourself all the time.
Chapter 8: How to embody abundance in your daily life?
Women who get what they want just get out there and they know that whoever they are as they are right now is enough to be out there. They belong out there. And if something doesn't go as planned, they will figure it out. It's not a reflection of their worth if it doesn't go the way they want it to. They don't hold themselves back.
So it's not sitting on the sideline, having this inner naysayer and this self-doubt and these limiting beliefs holding you back. It's fully believing that you are worthy of having what it is that you want. Hi, it's Hillary. I have a question for you, and let's be honest. Are you proud of what's in your pajama drawer?
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Go to CozyEarth.com and use code HILLARY for 40% off and tell them I sent you if you get a post-purchase survey. So habit number four, the women who always get what they want, they focus on what they do want, not on what they don't. And they don't see obstacles as a sign that it's not meant to be. So these women are fully 100% focused on what they want because where your focus goes is
grows, right? You've heard that before, which means if you focus on what you don't want to happen, that is what you'll get. If you plan for the problems and prepare for the problems and focus on the problems, you're going to get more problems. If you wait for the other shoe to drop, it inevitably falls. It makes sense why people do this, to prepare for the worst in case it happens.
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Chapter 9: What does it mean to 'be her now'?
But this is an anxiety response. It's a lack or a scarcity response. And it's not like problems don't occur for people. Shit always happens. But trusting that if and when they do, you will handle it and be able to just move on is the key. I want you to remember this and repeat after me. I deal with problems. I don't dwell on them. Say that again. I deal with problems. I don't dwell on them.
This is your new mantra. By focusing only on what you want, you are in solution-focused mode. You are outcome-focused and you're not getting caught up. and all the obstacles that keep you bogged down and stuck. Some of my ready for love clients have asked me over the years, Hillary, now that I'm out there dating again, how can I spot the narcissist?
How can I avoid getting involved with another one of those people? And my answer is stop looking for them. If you're looking for these guys out there and you've got your binoculars on and your microscope out and you're looking for them so that you can avoid them, you will get more of them in your life because you get what you expect. And what you focus on is what comes to you.
So instead, focus on what you do want. And what you do want is not the absence of what you don't. Let me say that again. Focusing on what you do want is not the absence of what you don't want. Women who get what they want expect good things. They're not bracing for disappointment. They're expecting success and that is what they get. Habit number five. These women keep their word to themselves.
So we've all heard the definition of integrity, which is doing the right thing even when no one else is looking, right? Well, guess what? Guess who's always looking? You are. And what you think matters above all, right? It matters more than what anyone else thinks. So women who always get what they want are impeccable with their word, especially to themselves.
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Chapter 10: How can you practice receiving what you want?
This means they always follow through on the things that are important to them. If they say they're going to do something, they do it. And if they say they are no longer going to do something, they stop doing it. period. When they say, I'm done with this, they're done. And when they say things like, I'm getting up early tomorrow to work out or move my body, they get up.
And when they say, I'm not going to tolerate that kind of treatment again, they hold the boundary, even when it's uncomfortable or hard, or even when it's inconvenient. Here's why this is so important. Every time you tell yourself that you're going to do something and then you don't, you chip away at your own trust.
You give yourself evidence that your word doesn't really mean that much, that you're not someone that you can rely on. And in relationships, when you don't have trust, you have nothing, right? Trust is the foundation of everything. You don't build a house on a faulty foundation with cracks. And in this relationship with yourself, if you can't trust yourself,
you fail to have a relationship with yourself at all. And over time, and without even realizing it, that becomes self-betrayal. And that becomes the reason that you hesitate or procrastinate or keep doubting yourself. So women who get what they want have built rock solid self-trust. And the way they've done it is simply by following through and doing what they say they're gonna do for themselves.
Habit number six. Women who always get what they want take radical responsibility for themselves in their life. I know this one might sting a little, but it's the truth that will completely set you free. Women who always get what they want are not sitting around blaming their ex, their boss, their parents, their past, their kids, their hormones, their DNA, or the timing of their life.
They aren't stuck in complaining mode and whining mode. about what they didn't get or the cards that they were dealt. They're not waiting for the stars to align or for someone else to come along and poof, magically change and make things different in their lives so that they can be happy and get what they want.
If something isn't working, whether it's in their career or their health or their relationships or their finances, they ask one powerful question. What's my part in this? They ask, how am I contributing to this? What am I allowing here? Where are my actions and my words out of alignment with my values and who I am and what I really want?
They're asking, what needs to change and what is within my power to change right now? This isn't about self-blame and it's definitely not about shaming. And it's not about beating yourself up. It's about taking back your power. Because here's the thing about blame and victim energy. It is the lowest vibrational state that you can be in. Just one tiny notch above death.
It is completely powerless and it keeps you stuck, small and spinning and suffering. Victim thinking sounds like, why me? Why is this happening to me? It's not fair. I can't help it. I've tried everything. There's nothing I can do. It's poor me thinking and somehow the universe has conspired against you. But women who get what they want don't live there. They don't live in that place.
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