The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
The Big Suey: The Uber Ratings Reveal (feat. Lucy Rohden)
Mon, 31 Mar
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"Put me next to you at your darkest moment, Mr. Uber Driver." The entire crew reveals their Uber ratings: Does anyone have a perfect rating? Who has the worst? Who will make The Dot Nine Crew™? What would Kon, Kager, Kinston, Kash, Kid, and the rest of The Flying Knueppel's ratings be? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
Chapter 1: What are the origins of tequila?
Now's a good time to remember where tequila's story truly began. In 1795, Cuervo invented tequila. Cuervo. What are you doing here? Cuervo. Anytime someone says Cuervo, I show up. Cuervo. The tequila that invented tequila. Proximo. Cuervo.com. Please drink responsibly.
Welcome to the Big Sui, presented by DraftKings. Why are you listening to this show? The podcast that seems very similar to the other Dan Levitard podcast. I'm sorry, I'm not going to apologize for that. In fact, the only difference seems to be this imaging. I have been tempted in restaurants just walking past tables to grab somebody's fries if they're just there. That hasn't happened to you guys?
I've done it. And now, here's the marching band to nowhere, fat face, and the habitual liar. We back, and we are joined by the great Lucy Rodin. What's up, Luce? How are you?
Hey, I'm sad I'm not there.
I know. I'm so happy you're in Miami. It was so much fun. You've never said that before, Lucy. I know. This is crazy. That was a great opportunity to play Look at Me, Lucy. Why was it? That was a great opportunity. Was it not? No. No? Do you not know how? I know what the meaning of it is, but still, I'm like, off of the last conversation that we had about Look at Me Everything... No?
She's got to brag about something first. Can't force it. He knows. Can you explain the show to him? It's my first day, Lucy. Good to see you. Hi, Lucy.
Hi.
You've been enjoying the tournament this year? The tournaments, I guess. Yes, question mark. Why the question mark?
It's... I think we've gotten like decent basketball and that's all you can want out of a tournament. But obviously there's a little there's a little like bummy vibe when you're like, oh, OK, here we are. All one seeds in the final four. No mid majors in the Sweet 16 or Elite Eight for the men. And you're just like, well, this is OK.
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Chapter 2: How do the podcast hosts handle Uber ratings?
That rules. Yeah. Chris, you look surprised that I know about Winky here. We're going to have to vet Winky here. It might be crowdsourced. I don't know. No. The Flying Knipples. Yeah. That was their nickname. How'd you know it? You said it before he did. Everybody knew about the Flying Knipples. They were one of the best teams, urban legend in the three-on-three community.
Everyone loves the flying knipples. And if you want to go see them play, that's a great reason for a trip that you can book with Priceline. Are you dreaming about that trip? Book it and go to your happy price with Priceline to see the flying knipples.
Way to sell, Lucy.
Thank you.
Everybody clap. That was when you talk again. She did a thing and now you go back to doing it. Everybody clap. So when she does that, she's done. Okay. And then you come in with the continuation of the conversation. Wait, hang on. Versus kicking it back to her. I have an update. To double down on Priceline.
According to Sporting News, the Flying Knipple brothers were Con, Clint, Clay, and Cole, but his brothers are Kager, Kinston, Cash, and Kidman. Kager? This is stupid. Yeah, that's crazy. What's stupid about it, Roy? It's just dumb. I'm sorry. No? No, it's dumb. The theme is stupid. I'm sorry.
Too many K's? Way too many K's. Way too many K's. How do we feel generally about naming conventions for like, my brother, his name starts with a D. Is that okay? If it's two, it's just me and him.
Is that okay?
It's just two. I'm Going into some scary territory right now because I know that Hawk has twins. Yeah, yeah. What about when you have twins and they have, like, rhyming names? Do you go rhyming names with twins? They don't rhyme. Okay. They are both AUs, Autumn and Aubrey. So it's very close. I feel like with twins, though, I'll allow it. Yeah?
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Chapter 3: Why is Lucy Rohden featured on this episode?
And we're all four letters. My mom said our last name was so ugly.
They're all going to go to Duke. Oh, no. Get used to them. Look at all those.
They're the Plumleets now.
The problem with making Con Canipple or trying to make him the white boy of the tournament is not just that he goes to Duke. It's that the white boy of the tournament has to go professional in something else. Like, Conker Nibble's gonna play in the NBA. You cannot, he has to, you have to see him later in life in a polo and slacks and be like, that name sounds familiar.
This guy tried to sell me some insurance. Oh yeah, you hit six threes in 1996. Yep, I agree. You have to, yes, you have to go that NCAA commercial where it says most of the NCAA athletes will go professional in something else. It has to fit that bucket. Otherwise, you're just another great white guy from college basketball that goes and plays in the NBA.
It should be in something else. In something. It just peters out right there. It's something other than sports. In something. In something else. Give him some time. Not everybody knows in college. Remember Jack Mulkey? Figure it out. He played in the G League. I think he's still in the G League. He's in the G League now. He's averaging like three points a game.
Lucy, what am I to do with the SEC narrative, especially when 25% of the ACC teams made the Final Four on the men's side? Oh, gosh.
There was someone at the Duke-Alabama game that was screaming behind us the whole time of like, you mighty SEC, you don't know what you face. Obviously, the SEC is, they were the best team, our conference in college basketball this year, and the ACC is ass. Like, it's just objective. And they're just kind of entirely banking on Duke being a good program.
I love sort of the theory of the ACC combining with the Big East. I don't know how valid that is, but I think that's something interesting to look at.
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Chapter 4: What is the debate about Cinderella teams in basketball?
So I must take a break from the jokes here for a second and put on my serious voice, because I would never ever joke about a 5G network that has invested billions building 5G towers across the country. Not even once. Not even if Mr. Boost Mobile himself asked me to. There is nothing funny about it. Boost Mobile is now a legit nationwide 5G network and also provides coverage across 99% of America.
Seriously. Visit BoostMobile.com or your nearest Boost Mobile store location to learn more. The Boost Mobile Network, together with our roaming partners, covers 99% of the U.S. population. 5G speeds not available in all areas. Don Levitard.
I just texted my best friend Hannah and asked her who she thinks is going to win tonight. And she has never watched a hockey game this entire season. She's picking the Rangers. And she's an astrophysicist. She's real smart. I'll text Joey. Dan, you know what I found out about Hannah today? An anagram. Stugatz. You said Anna or Hannah? Hannah.
Okay, I don't know. Anna too, depending on how you spell it. Even though there's two N's, it's also an anagram. Same with one N, Anna.
anagrams are fun race car a anagram this is the dan levatar show with the stugats lucy do me a favor you got your phone near you yes okay look up my phone case kind of question is oh nice phone case isn't that cute it's very cute where'd you find it uh case to find no free oh okay it was i mean i i think
Stories behind where you find things are normally more interesting than I just bought it, but that's fine.
Yeah, I just bought it.
So go to your Uber and find your Uber rating. While you're doing that, Charlie, I also contacted Pablo, Dan, and David Sampson to get their Uber ratings. So Charlie, please run down the list of ranking who you think has the highest to worst Uber rating. Hold on, Lucy. Don't tell us yours yet. Okay, I have it. You have it? You ready? All right, Charlie.
I'm starting at the top, highest to lowest. It's a better reveal. Number one, okay. I'm going Hawk. Football players are on time. He's a receiver, though. Oh, it's a good point. He's a receiver. And I feel like everyone's on my time, always. All right, well, I put you in the number one spot. That might be hand up, my bad. Let's be honest with you, man. Number two. I get there when I get there.
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