Digital Social Hour
Self-Sabotage, Nervous System Hacks & The Real Work of Growth | Rachel Gibler DSH #1204
Wed, 26 Feb 2025
🔥 Rachel Gibler on Healing Trauma, Manifestation & The Truth About Self-Growth 🚀 In this eye-opening episode, we sit down with Rachel Gibler, host of the "It’s F*cking Spiritual" podcast, to explore manifestation, inner healing, nervous system regulation, and why mindset work alone isn’t enough. Rachel shares: ✅ How childhood trauma impacts success & relationships ✅ Why vision boards and affirmations aren’t the full picture ✅ The power of somatic healing & nervous system work ✅ Her experience with isolation, healing, and personal growth ✅ Balancing masculine & feminine energy for success This conversation is raw, deep, and will challenge everything you thought you knew about self-development. 📲 Follow Rachel Gibler & Learn More: 🔗 Instagram: @rachelgibler 🎙 Podcast: It’s Fcking Spiritual* on Spotify, Apple & YouTube ⏱ CHAPTERS ⏳ 00:00 – Rachel Gibler on the Truth About Manifestation & Healing ⏳ 03:10 – Vision Boards & The Problem With Surface-Level Manifestation ⏳ 06:45 – How Childhood Trauma Shapes Success & Self-Sabotage ⏳ 11:20 – The Power of Somatic Healing & Nervous System Work ⏳ 15:50 – How Breathwork Can Instantly Shift Your Mindset ⏳ 20:30 – Rachel’s Journey From Skeptic to Spiritual Teacher ⏳ 26:15 – The Masculine & Feminine Balance in Business & Life ⏳ 31:40 – The Feminist Movement, Red Pill Culture & The Truth About Polarity ⏳ 38:10 – Self-Sabotage & How to Break Free From Limiting Patterns ⏳ 44:00 – The Power of Emotional Release & Healing Trauma ⏳ 50:30 – How to Expand Your Capacity for More in Life & Business 🎙 Sponsored by Lumati Red Boost your health, energy, and recovery with Lumati Red – the ultimate turmeric formula for pain relief and inflammation support. No pills, no hassle – just powerful, fast-acting results! 💪 Get yours now at Lumati.com and feel the difference! 🚀 🔥 Apply to Be on the Podcast & Business Inquiries: 🎙 APPLY TO BE ON THE PODCAST: https://www.digitalsocialhour.com/application 📩 BUSINESS INQUIRIES/SPONSORS: [email protected]
Chapter 1: What is the truth about manifestation and healing?
I feel like I've gotten to the core and the root of what actually heals and not just get the things you want on your vision board and manifest your dream life. It's like, okay, well you're going to do that. And if you get what you want, you're not going to be able to feel it. And then you're going to be burnt out.
Right.
Yeah.
Yeah. I do vision boards every year. They're fun, but it shouldn't be the main focus.
Right. Exactly. Or future scripting or doing the things that so many people teach from the top down, which is, you know,
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Chapter 2: How does childhood trauma shape success and self-sabotage?
change your mindset change your life not realizing that the state of our body and the state of our nervous system is the thing that's actually driving us and driving our patterns and driving anything that's self-sabotaging and until we get that on board we're not going to be able to feel the thing that we created or we're going to continue to self-sabotage ourselves out of it right all right guys got rachel here today it's fucking spiritual podcast what a name thanks for coming on yeah thank you so much for having me what's been new with you this year
Oh my gosh, so much. I feel like I have been on such a deep healing journey over the past two years. It has completely changed my life and my business and my work, and I know we'll go into it. But yeah, I've... Yeah, I feel like I have been reborn. I'm just getting out of my Saturn return. So if any of your listeners know about that, that is when your life blows up.
So I've been on quite the journey over the last two years.
How to heal some of that childhood trauma.
Yes, exactly.
Yeah, I didn't even know I had any. And then I started healing and I was like, damn, I had a lot.
And it keeps going. There are layers of the onion. And I've been doing this work for seven years and realized that it continues to peel back the layers.
What was the first healing thing you tried out?
I've done so many different things and modalities, but I mean, I guess to kind of tell you just to understand kind of where I started, I guess I can start with my story a little bit so your listeners kind of get to know me a bit. And I... I grew up as someone who was not into this work at all. I don't know about you if you were.
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Chapter 3: Why isn't mindset work enough for true healing?
I was skeptical.
Okay. I was a huge skeptic. I thought a lot of this was bullshit, to be honest.
Yeah.
Growing up and I would have considered myself atheist and I wasn't spiritual. I didn't have any belief outside of myself or anything. And when I was 16 years old, my dad was killed in a freak accident and it completely started my journey. And it started with an eight year downward spiral until my early 20s. And I was deep in partying and, you know, going out and drinking and everything.
You had a near-death experience? It wasn't a near-death experience. I just shattered my leg. But it basically started where I was 23 years old. I was working a corporate job that I hated in a cubicle under fluorescent lights, you know, just going out and blacking out on the weekends. I just had no direction in my life at all. And one day I was crying out. It was like lunchtime.
And I just thought, oh, my gosh, I just want time to stop so I can think for a second. And as I know now, your wish is my command with the universe. And two weeks later, I shattered my leg and had to take three months medical leave. So I stopped and I got a chance to think. And yeah, I was really gifted with that time of healing. And a few weeks into my journey after my surgery, I
I was laying in my bed, a cast from my hip to my ankle, and I just had this knowing, like, if I use this time wisely, everything I've been through won't be all for nothing. And I started by Googling how to be happy. Like, I had no idea.
I've done that before. Yeah. Right.
Like in I love telling that part of the story because anybody that's listening to this, it's like it doesn't matter where you are on your journey now. Someone could look at you right and be like, oh, you've made it so far. Look at me with my podcast or the things that I've done. And there's like this gap. Right.
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Chapter 4: How can somatic healing and nervous system work transform your life?
I got really into spirituality and manifestation and was doing all the things they tell you to do in this work, which is journal and future script your life and decide what you want and connect to why you want it. And it got me pretty far. I found a lot of success with the podcast and with my coaching business. And I woke up a few years ago and realized I am burnt out. I'm exhausted.
And I have all the stuff I wanted on my vision board and it didn't make me feel any better. And that was the turning point of these last couple of years, which is, yeah, getting into nervous system and somatic work and inner child healing and healing from the inside out.
Yeah, I have a very similar journey. I worked so hard, you know, 80 hours a week. And that got me far. But like you said, burnout, you can't avoid that. You're working so hard, waking up at five and sacrificing physical health to get success financially.
Yeah. And it all comes from a dysregulated nervous system state if it's coming from a place of not enoughness. And I dove really deep into this over the last few years. I spent three months in complete isolation doing this work. Yeah. A year and a half ago. So we can dive into that, too. But I tend to be extreme. So I don't know about you, but... That's extreme. Yeah.
I went deep into my own healing journey and just worked with a somatic therapist and myself. Wow. And... But really, it changed everything for me, the level of groundedness, the level of connection that I have with myself, because when we're dysregulated, we're completely disconnected from our intuition.
And so now I feel like I've gotten to the core and the root of what actually heals and not just get the things you want on your vision board and manifest your dream life. It's like, OK, well, you're going to do that. And if you get what you want, you're not going to be able to feel it. And then you're going to be burnt out.
Right.
Yeah.
Yeah. I do vision boards every year. They're fun, but it shouldn't be the main focus.
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Chapter 5: How does balancing masculine and feminine energy lead to success?
And what's been your work? Like, have you started to work through it?
Now it's just basically opening up. I would hold emotions back.
Yeah.
And not speak them. Because my attachment style was avoidant from my childhood trauma. When my parents would yell at me, I would just go to my room, shut down. So I've been working on that.
Yeah. Well, and to your point... Our attachment styles and our trauma or the way that we handle things, they're really smart protection mechanisms that we have, right? There's like nothing to shame ourselves about or to blame ourselves for. It's just an awareness that we get to have. Right.
And then we get to start to regulate our nervous system and choose something different, which I've got a whole process around.
Yeah. Breath work has helped me with that. Breath work's huge. Yeah, Wim Hof. I've literally done breath tests where I'll measure my nervous system and it'd be so bad. And then I'll do breath work immediately better. So you could change the stuff pretty quick.
You can. Right. And that's what I teach is breath movement and sound, which is the primordial language. And that's how we actually get... connected into the feeling state in our body because we're living, so many people are walking around living dissociated and living in their mind and living in story, right?
And not realizing that there's an internal state that's dysregulation that's running the show that happened when you were a child. So it's like when you were a kid and your parents were yelling at you or something, you probably got really tight, dysregulated. It sounds like you went into flight, right? That dysregulated state, fight or flight.
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Chapter 6: What is the impact of the feminist movement and red pill culture on relationships?
Right.
And until we learn how to feel from that child, the impermissible feelings that we didn't actually get to feel, then... We just think it's our personality. We think it's who we are when in reality, it's an adaptation to keep us safe.
I agree. Yeah. For me, I think it was not enough affection and attention as a kid. My parents were pretty hands off. So I just felt like I constantly had to prove myself, you know?
Yeah. Yeah. I so get it. For me, I was coded with you need to be better. Like you need to be better than everyone. Really a hyper masculine approach to like as a kid, I needed to get straight A's and do all the things that were, you know. proved that I was enough through my achievements.
Right.
And as I've done this work, I've really had to learn to let go that, like, the reason I'm loved isn't because of my achievements, because of who I am.
Right.
You know? And I think that it's a journey that we all get to take.
Yeah, because a lot of people tie their identity to their achievements. Yeah. Right. That's like an easy way of thinking. But that's not the case.
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Chapter 7: How do emotions get stuck in the body and how can they be released?
Talk to me about this soft girl era. What's that about?
Okay. Yeah, it kind of goes with what we've been talking about, which is I... I'm just going to talk in general about our culture right now. And I think I could get some hate for this, but we'll see what happens. I think in the feminist movement and in this era of we've gotten programmed of women like reclaiming their power, which is beautiful.
I am all for women getting to work, women getting to provide for themselves, women getting to have a voice and a seat at the table. I am such a stand for that. And what I mentioned earlier on the podcast is, like, we often overcorrect and swing the pendulum in the opposite direction, which I think we've done as a culture as well.
And it has completely flipped the polarity between masculine and feminine. And if we're talking masculine as men and feminine as women, right? So it ends up, and I'll speak from personal experience, being a woman who was so striving to achieve and, yeah, like... achieve and prove myself and force and hustle like the boss babe era. Perfect example of this idea that like, I don't need a man.
I can, I can provide for myself and I can be a boss babe and I can make all this money and do all these things. And then I looked at my relationships and I realized I'm competing with my relationships. I'm fully in my masculine. And I think people get really triggered by that.
Um,
But when you really look at, well, how are your relationships? Are you feeling really satisfied? Are you feeling, yeah, or are you competing? Are you butting heads in your relationships?
And so I started to do this feminine work and realizing I think so many women go down that path and overcorrect and then end up feeling burnt out, exhausted, resentful, resentful in their relationships, resentful with what they've created. And that was certainly my case.
And so I kind of started talking about I'm entering my soft girl era, which is just like a fun way of saying I'm learning to let go of control. I'm learning how to surrender. I'm learning how to let men lead, which that will probably anger a lot of people. Yeah.
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