Conan talks to Rianne in the city of Taguig about the struggles she faces in life as a vertically-challenged person. Wanna get a chance to talk to Conan? Submit here: teamcoco.com/apply Get access to all the podcasts you love, music channels and radio shows with the SiriusXM App! Get 3 months free using this show link: https://siriusxm.com/conan.
Chapter 1: Who is Rianne and where is she from?
Conan O'Brien needs a fan. Want to talk to Conan? Visit teamcoco.com slash callconan. Okay, let's get started. Hello. Hi, Rianne. Welcome to Conan Needs a Fan.
Hi, Rianne. How are you? Oh, gosh, this is really happening.
Hi, I'm great. How are the two of you?
It was very nice to meet you, Rianne. Tell us, where are you right now?
I'm in Taguig, Metro Manila, Philippines. Yeah.
The Philippines. And how do you pronounce it again? Taguig?
Yes. Oh, you did pretty well. Yeah. Taguig. Perfect.
Just say I did very well.
It sounded a little patronizing.
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Chapter 2: What struggles does Rianne face as a vertically-challenged person?
Okay.
Rianne, it's nice to meet you. And you're from Tagig, Philippines. And I've never been to the Philippines before. Maybe you could tell me a little bit about yourself. What do I need to know about Rianne?
I'm 29, but I stand at 4'10". So even for a Filipino, I am quite short. So average height for women is about 5'2". I struggle a lot. going through life as a vertically challenged person?
Well, Rianne, I am also a vertically challenged person, but the other way. So there are problems. I'm a bit on the tall side and I'm always smashing into things. People laugh at me. They play circus music when I walk through the room. So I do have some sympathy. Tell me, you struggle. What things do you struggle with being four feet ten? What do you struggle with?
So there are a lot of just the world isn't built for short people. I think you genuinely have it better. So just going to the grocery is a challenge. I don't like going without my boyfriend because I don't like asking for help to reach the top shelves. Sometimes going to the theme park.
Can I ask you how tall is your boyfriend?
He's 5'7". Might not seem tall to you, but he's taller than I am. It helps a lot.
Yeah, to you, he's like The Rock, you know?
Exactly, yeah. To me, once you hit 5'5", there is no difference between my boyfriend and Conan. You're all tall to me.
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Chapter 3: How does Rianne cope with being short in everyday situations?
Exactly, yeah.
So you don't like going to the grocery store, and you said you don't like going to theme parks?
Yes. Always a tense moment finding out whether I can go on a ride or not. Driving is a challenge. I have to sit on a pillow to see over the dash.
Wow. And what about your feet? I mean, the pillow will get you high enough, but what about your feet? What do you do there to get there?
Exactly. So there is a perfect ratio. I do not like other people driving my car because it moves the seat. And then you got to find the ratio again. So that's a challenge.
You get mistaken for a child a lot. People think you're a child. They pat you on the head and things. Yeah.
Exactly. Especially when we're traveling in the States, I get carded a lot and they don't accept our driver's license. So I gotta grab my passport and whip it out. One time, a TSA agent, we were going through. So I went through and then he was like, to my mom, minors gotta be accompanied by adults. And my mom was like, she's 22. She's not a minor. And the guy was genuine. You are not 22. So...
Wow. OK, so you've struggled with this. And are you do you like to drive once once you are driving? Are you and you've got the seat just right and you've got the pedals just right and you're comfortable? Are you a good driver? I am.
I am a competent and law-abiding driver. I may have a bit of road rage when it's deserved.
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Chapter 4: What challenges does Rianne encounter while driving?
You haven't driven in the Philippines. You would understand if you were here.
Okay. Can we act out your road rage? Because I want to see, Rianne, what it actually looks like. So you're driving and then I'm in a car next to you. I'm driving a bright red Buick LeSabre. And I suddenly cut you off in my bright red Buick LeSabre. Show me what you would do.
move motherfucker i'm just kidding it's probably a lot more like i swear wait do you always do you always do you always giggle in between move and then motherfucker do you always go move yeah motherfucker
You're like the Joker with Tourette's. So say it to me again, how you would do it in the Philippines. I just want to hear it. The whole thing, the whole run. I just cut you off.
Go. Fucking move, motherfucker. Yeah.
Nice. Don't be apologetic. I mean, let's get that out on a rap track. You know? Move, motherfucker.
Yeah.
Yeah, that would be a hit, I think.
I want her to say it, though, specifically, because you have a good, like, I could tell you get angry.
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Chapter 5: How does Rianne feel about her height in social situations?
Oh, your mom isn't going to hear this. Does your mom even know who I am?
Oh, yeah. My parents love you. You're their favorite late night host. My dad thinks you're hilarious.
Oh, good.
I think my mom likes you. My mom likes you the best because you're the one that went to Harvard, she says.
Wow. Always the best sign of who's funny. The funny one must have gone to an Ivy League school. Because that's where the funny people come from. So your challenges in life, if I can sum up, Rianne, are that you wish you were a little taller, right? Because you are... Did you say 4'10"? Mm-hmm. Okay. And you have to rely on your towering boyfriend who's 5'7".
You don't like going to the market and you don't like going to theme parks because they think you're a child. Yes? And then you have an... Insane road rage when you're driving through the Philippines. Is that right?
Yeah. What about concerts? Exactly. Yeah. Sona, you get me. I do. I never, I never like sit in the, or stay in the mosh pit section because I'll get crushed and I will not see anything. So I stay up in the stands where it's safe and I can see things. Yeah.
But also you probably have a good view sometimes, but then someone else stands in front of you and blocks your view and you want to get mad at them. But then it turns out it's an eight year old.
Not an eight year old.
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Chapter 6: What humorous experiences has Rianne had because of her height?
You call us the talls?
Is that what you call us? Yeah.
We're like the white walkers. The talls are coming. They can only be killed with blue ice. Yeah.
The shorts have their own organization.
Shorts versus the talls. Well, let me ask you something, Rianne. If I were to come visit you, what kinds of things would we do together?
Well, first, I think I need your help to run errands. I think if it's okay with you, I would like your help first to just generally send a message of unity with talls and shorts in general.
Oh, you want me to go with you, run errands, right? Because I can use my height to assist you.
Exactly.
But you also want me to be kind of an ambassador, right?
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Chapter 7: How do Rianne and Conan connect over their height differences?
Yes, exactly. Just to show people that short and tall people can coexist and help each other.
Yes, yes. It's like that song, Ebony and Ivory.
Exactly.
Except there isn't one for tall people and short people. And we need that.
So we'd write one of our own, yeah.
Yeah, we'd write maybe a song about how tall people and short people should all live in harmony.
Correct. And then after that... I don't think tall people and short people are constantly at war.
No. I don't think there's a big battle.
The talls versus the shorts. I don't know if... Yeah, I don't know if that happens. But at concerts, like, you probably have stood in front of a shorter person.
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Chapter 8: What message does Rianne want to share about tall and short people?
What?
Just to completely block. I think it's funny.
What a dick.
Yeah.
That's awful.
Yeah, I wear a T-shirt that says, I'm a dick.
Oh.
Hey, Rianne, do you think that because of your size, you say it affects your personality? How does it affect your personality at work? Do you ever think you overcompensate at work?
Maybe not overcompensate. Just be a bit more assertive. Because sometimes if I say something, maybe during a meeting, the reaction can be a little bit like, good job, kid. Great, great idea. No, that's very, that's patronizing. Yeah. And they like to... They always end up calling me Riri. I never introduced myself as Riri. It feels like a microaggression. Like, why are you diminutizing my name?
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