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Chief Change Officer

#365 Darcy Eikenberg: How to Rescue Your Career Without Quitting

Tue, 13 May 2025

Description

You’re exhausted. The meetings are pointless, the politics are draining, and your boss sends Slack messages that trigger a fight-or-flight response. It feels like the only answer is to walk away.But what if there’s another way?In this episode, executive coach and author Darcy Eikenberg shares how to turn burnout into clarity without updating your résumé. Drawing from her book Red Cape Rescue: Save Your Career Without Leaving Your Job, Darcy walks us through how to reset how you think, revise what you say, and reinvent what you do—starting from exactly where you are.With practical strategies, human stories, and a little neuroscience thrown in, this episode is your guide to taking back control without burning bridges—or burning out.Key Highlights of Our Interview:The Red Cape Metaphor: Confidence, Not Costumes“When you feel like your shoulders are back and you’re in control—that’s your red cape moment. And yes, you can create that at work.”The Lizard Brain Is Lying to You“Our primitive brain can’t tell the difference between a tiger and a tough email. Fear isn’t the problem—it’s how you respond to it.”The Three Levers of Change“We only control three things: what we say, what we do, and what we think. That’s it. But it’s enough.”You Can’t See the Label From Inside the Jar“Try this: record yourself venting about work, then play it back. Pull out the facts. Ditch the stories. You’ll be shocked at what you hear.”Rewriting the Story Without Leaving the Company“One client didn’t get the promotion. She wanted to quit. But instead, we helped her speak up—and now she leads the entire agency.”When Mindset Blocks the Next Move“Another client thought he was just being realistic. Turns out, everyone else thought he was negative—and it was holding him back.”Fear Strategy Fearlessness“You don’t need to be fearless. You need a plan for when fear shows up—and it always does.”What to Do First (Before You Quit)“Get clear. What’s actually happening? What do you want? What’s in your control? Clarity is the first rescue step.”Self-Awareness Is the New Leadership Superpower“Your values matter. So does how you’re wired. One person’s burnout is another person’s boredom—know your triggers.”______________________Connect with us:Host: Vince Chan | Guests: Darcy Eikenberg  --Chief Change Officer--Change Ambitiously. Outgrow Yourself.Open a World of Expansive Human Intelligencefor Transformation Gurus, Black Sheep,Unsung Visionaries & Bold Hearts.EdTech Leadership Awards 2025 Finalist.18 Million+ All-Time Downloads.80+ Countries Reached Daily.Global Top 1.5% Podcast.Top 10 US Business.Top 1 US Careers.>>>170,000+ are outgrowing. Act Today.<<<

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Chapter 1: Who are the hosts and guests of this podcast episode?

12.708 - 55.132 Vince Chan

Hi, everyone. Welcome to our show, Chief Change Officer. I'm Vince Chen, your ambitious human host. Our show is a modernist humility for change progressives in organizational and human transformation from around the world. So, you're thinking of quitting your job? Trust me, I've been there many times in my corporate life. You've hit a roadblock.

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56.272 - 93.507 Vince Chan

Each morning, you're dragging yourself out of bed, dreading the day ahead. The office vibe feels off. Politics and gossip are draining, and deadlines seem endless. Walking away feels like the only way out, whether quietly or loudly. But our guest today, Darcy Eichenberg,

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94.514 - 136.081 Vince Chan

Author of the book titled, Red Cape Rescue, Save Your Career Without Leaving Your Job, says, you don't have to quit to save your career, but how? I know what it's like to feel stuck. Back then, I wished for someone who could help me find a way out. When reading Darcy's book, I kept thinking, I wish I would have this when I needed it. But you don't have to wait.

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137.402 - 161.245 Vince Chan

In today's episode, Darcy and I dive into why staying might be the best move and how you can bounce back from a low point. We are all Incredibles with the superpowers to save ourselves. Let's get started.

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Chapter 2: What inspired Darcy Eikenberg to write Red Cape Rescue?

171.368 - 200.799 Darcy Eikenberg

Yeah, thanks, Vincent. And I'm so honored that you saw yourself in the book because it really reflected my own journey. I was a successful professional like you had been for many years. And every few years got new opportunities. Just things happened. I followed the next thread of a promotion or a move to a different city. And then one day I realized was leading a group in my consulting firm.

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201.34 - 224.036 Darcy Eikenberg

I was talking to my boss and she told me she was going to retire. All of a sudden, like that was the next step up and I realized, wow, I don't want that job. And then in the next moment, I recognized What's next for me? And this was really a crossroads point in my career because I looked good on paper. I looked like I had everything that I needed. I had a great job.

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224.516 - 245.806 Darcy Eikenberg

I had great friends, a big company, made enough money. But I realized that I didn't know where I wanted to go next. And I was trusting my company and just the economy and the environment to push me along instead of me being clear about how I wanted to push myself, what I was being pulled towards.

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246.266 - 265.052 Darcy Eikenberg

So that started my journey of actually finding my first coach, recognizing I didn't know how to do this. No one teaches us in school how to navigate our careers. I think we're probably doing a better job now with a generation coming up, but I still think there's a lot of myths out there.

0

265.632 - 290.628 Darcy Eikenberg

And so I was on my own personal journey of discovery of who was I at this point in my life and what did I want and how could I make a contribution to people, to the world and to my own self? I wanted to make an impact. I never thought that I would have my own business. I never thought I would be a coach or a speaker or an author. Those weren't thoughts that were placed in my head.

291.148 - 309.495 Darcy Eikenberg

But as I really learned more about myself and I started on my own internal journey, I realized there were skills and talents and abilities that I had that could support people in helping make them better as opposed to me being have to be the person out in front who's doing everything.

309.975 - 335.944 Darcy Eikenberg

And I learned about the world of human development, of human potential, which included at the time the world of coaching, personal development. Actually had an opportunity to create an internal coaching business in the company that I had grown up in. I realized if the right job for me wasn't there, the right job, the next job wasn't there, maybe I can make it up.

336.624 - 359.51 Darcy Eikenberg

And so I did and went through a business case process to sell that into the company. And once I got the okay to do that, it gave me an opportunity to see what this new world could look like. A couple of years later, went out on my own and coaching and teaching and speaking ever since about 15 years. So that's how I got into where I am now and.

359.85 - 380.544 Darcy Eikenberg

The book you reference, Red Cape Rescue, Save Your Career Without Leaving Your Job, I wrote a couple of years ago and it was really a fumilation of a lot of the learnings that I had, that my clients have had, and people just like you have had about how to get over those stuck places. When you're on a career path and you get stuck, you hit a roadblock.

Chapter 3: Who does Darcy primarily work with as an executive coach?

494.738 - 509.882 Darcy Eikenberg

Not everybody can afford or invest in the work of a personal coach. So having something that is accessible, like a book that is a low investment, that's easy to read, maybe even fun to read, is an opportunity to help more people.

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511.36 - 525.545 Vince Chan

Your book is called Red Cape Rescue. The first question that came to my mind was why Red Cape? What is the meaning behind this title?

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527.626 - 553.651 Darcy Eikenberg

So my company is called Red Cape Revolution. And the story behind that is remembering when you were a kid and you'd grab a towel or a sheet and you throw it around your shoulders. You'd stand up straight and you felt confident. You felt in control, even if you were only in control of the backyard. In everything that I've done,

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554.251 - 575.409 Darcy Eikenberg

Throughout my work, I've wanted people to be able to regain that feeling. What would change in our lives at work if we could all have that red cape feeling? If we could all feel like we were confident, our shoulders are thrown back, we were in control. And I believe we can have that feeling. I just think we don't always recognize it.

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575.509 - 599.463 Darcy Eikenberg

And we don't always recognize what is in our control as opposed to waiting for others to change or waiting for others to tell us what to feel, what to think. So Red Cape Rescue. was a spinoff of Red Cape Revolution, which is what if you could rescue your career? What if you didn't have to change your career or change your job?

600.063 - 616.307 Darcy Eikenberg

Anytime you hit a roadblock, you hit that speed bump, you hit that point where you're like, you get news and your boss is retiring and you don't want that job like happened to me. So that's really what a Red Cape Rescue is. It's a rescue in your career that you can do yourself.

617.879 - 663.118 Vince Chan

So we are all our own superheroes, right? Batman, Spiderman, Superman, the Incredibles. We each have that hero inside us. And as I read your book, I notice you lay it out in three distinct parts. Reset how you think. Revise what you say. and reinvent what you do. Could you give us an overview of these three stages of transformation? Reset, revise, and reinvent.

664.519 - 686.465 Vince Chan

I think it would be really helpful for listeners, whether they are senior, junior, or mid-level, who might feel a bit stuck. A breakdown of this process might give them some inspiration and even help them find a way forward.

Chapter 4: What is the meaning behind the title 'Red Cape Rescue'?

687.885 - 705.771 Darcy Eikenberg

Yes, yes. One of the things that was a surprise to me in my journey was when I recognized that there are only three things that we control. We only control what we say, what we do, and what we think.

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706.744 - 732.063 Darcy Eikenberg

There's three sections, each have chapters within it that break down different ways that we can choose our thoughts, which is something that many of us don't recognize how much control we have over our thoughts. There are details on how we can choose what to say, or in some cases, what not to say. And then there's detailed chapters in the reinvent what we do around

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732.583 - 756.423 Darcy Eikenberg

actions to take, how we can think differently about the actions that we take to get unstuck. So they really revolve around the knowledge that we only control those three things. And like you, Vince, I work with a lot of smart, accomplished people. It's sometimes a surprise to us when we really look at it and we realize what we are trying to control that is out of our control.

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756.963 - 780.599 Darcy Eikenberg

We can't control the economy. We can't control what's going on in the world. Can we make a choice about how we're thinking about it? Absolutely. And can that choice change how we feel, what our experience is of it? We can actually all see the same thing, but make different choices about what we think about it, what we say about it, and what we do about it.

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781.2 - 806.584 Darcy Eikenberg

And once we recognize we have the reins of those three levers, and only those three levers, If we ask our boss for a raise, what they will say. But we can take the first step. We can... plan our thoughts, plan our conversation. We can plan our mindset of no matter what they say, at least we've reached out, we've expressed what we need.

807.105 - 825.932 Darcy Eikenberg

So each of the chapters are really designed to go deeper into different ways that you can work on your thoughts, which again, many people may call mindset, but I do like to think about controlling your thoughts because there are a lot of thoughts that you can choose differently. The same way with your words and what you do,

826.912 - 864.949 Vince Chan

we can make active choices of those in the same way that you chose what you the shirt you put on today the first section reset really resonates with me knowing yourself understanding yourself that self-awareness you emphasize is powerful once we graduate from college We are basically on our own with no career center or clear path to guide us. Yet, we have 30, 40, even 50 years of work life ahead.

Chapter 5: What are the three stages of transformation in Red Cape Rescue?

866.49 - 898.573 Vince Chan

And even when career centers are available in college or business school, the scope is often narrowed, leaving us without realistic guidance on figuring ourselves out and charting our own course. So this self-awareness, this self-empowerment that you talk about and reset how you think really feels essential.

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900.634 - 929.504 Vince Chan

From your experience working with seasoned leaders and helping them figure out who they are and where they're going, Could you share a few examples? Maybe one success story and one more challenging case. Just to give us some insights into the process, the lessons learned, and what navigating those challenges can look like. Story time.

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Chapter 6: How does Darcy explain the three levers of change we control?

931.206 - 946.052 Darcy Eikenberg

Sure. Storytime. Sure. One of my favorite stories, and I won't use the names so that they don't recognize themselves because our work is always confidential, but was a leader in a large advertising firm. She led

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947.072 - 972.894 Darcy Eikenberg

million-dollar clients who were incredibly successful for the firm, an incredibly big part of the firm, and was up for promotion, up to lead all of the client service parts of the firm, and didn't get it, and got feedback that totally surprised her of a senior leader's opinion that she wasn't ready for, where she was sure she was. And what happens to us when

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974.056 - 998.042 Darcy Eikenberg

The way we think we are is mirrored back to us differently is we get angry, we get frustrated. And then we start to get depressed and sad and we think, oh, maybe I'm not as good as I think I am. And what can happen unattended is that somebody can go and start to play small again. That it's hard to get ourselves back revved up when we get knocked down like that.

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998.502 - 1023.234 Darcy Eikenberg

Fortunately, she had a colleague who'd worked with me in the past who introduced us when we started working together. What we really discovered over time was that whereas that fight or flight kicked in, oh, they don't want me, then I should leave. But there were a lot of good things in what she was doing. And actually, she hadn't done a clear job of communicating all of the

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1023.914 - 1053.216 Darcy Eikenberg

the value that she was creating for the firm with the CEO and the other C-suite leaders, she actually was making it look too easy. And so wasn't getting true credit for it and not in a braggadocious way, but in a way that was honest and consistent and that helped them see the things that I think she was taking for granted. I call it making the invisible visible. That things worked.

1053.376 - 1075.831 Darcy Eikenberg

The client was happy. The client was paying their bills. They didn't worry about her. And so when the situation came up for promotion, she was not really on the radar screen because it didn't seem like there were problems to solve. But she had been solving all the problems behind the scenes all along. She had been doing the good work. So once he recognized she hadn't been...

1076.611 - 1092.138 Darcy Eikenberg

using the lever of saying things more often, telling her story more often, rewriting the story of the picture of how she's leading, not just the being in the doing, but being in the leading people, the leading clients and in

1093.058 - 1116.034 Darcy Eikenberg

probably it was another year she had an opportunity to take on a new position in the company and to close the loop on that she stayed at that same agency just recently became the head of the entire agency as some of those c3 leaders have now retired that never would have happened if in that one roadblock that one

1116.774 - 1142.404 Darcy Eikenberg

I didn't get the promotion, that fit of mad, that fit of why don't they see what I do. She had said, I'm going to pack up my things and go look for another job and had left. She'd stayed, used the leverage, the relationships, the things she had and is now gone. really recreating and doing a great job in an important group that's doing a lot of good work.

Chapter 7: Why is self-awareness essential for career transformation?

1142.724 - 1161.497 Darcy Eikenberg

So that's one story of where just that little intervention and then support over time can really make a big difference in someone's career path. She probably wouldn't have gotten to the opportunity of being in that C-suite level as quickly if she had left and gone somewhere else.

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1163.314 - 1195.529 Vince Chan

I'd love to hear about the other side of things too. We just discussed a more successful case. But I'm also curious about the challenges you faced in helping people through this journey. Stories where things didn't go as planned. Maybe there's a single story that stands out. Or maybe it's a pattern across different experiences.

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1197.471 - 1229.694 Vince Chan

Whether it's due to a client's own psychology, some part of their past serving as a barrier to change, or something else entirely, I'll be interested to know why. Even with all the interventions, guidance, and effort, things sometimes just don't click. Any insights you can share from these not-so-successful transformations would be valuable.

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Chapter 8: Can you share examples of career challenges and success stories?

1231.206 - 1252.939 Darcy Eikenberg

I'll tell you some of the story about somebody who was getting the mindset was getting in his own way. I had worked with a leader at a large financial services firm and had led a very big team, but they had. during COVID had gone remote, though the team was more detached.

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1253.52 - 1277.227 Darcy Eikenberg

Part of the team was very much heads down into on computers, working on data, managing fraud, just a lot of like very intensive computer-based work as opposed to conversations and decisions and connections with people. And that's what the role was. His role was to manage that group plus folks who were actually creating new tools. And

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1278.491 - 1306.076 Darcy Eikenberg

We during a process of getting some stakeholder feedback, he heard that he was coming across as basically very negative and it was holding him back. And if this was a surprise to him because he just felt he was being realistic, times were hard. The team was very dispersed. Some of the team members weren't happy. The organization itself was going through a lot of change.

0

1306.096 - 1332.85 Darcy Eikenberg

And he fought the external perception of they saw it as negative and didn't feel that it was that this is somebody that they wanted to promote, that they wanted to give new opportunities to, that they wanted to invest in. He thought that was not his intention to be negative. His intention was to be realistic. So this is an example of choosing a thought. And the truth is, both are correct.

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1333.51 - 1349.569 Darcy Eikenberg

It was realistic that things were hard and there were issues in the company and things weren't perfect. People perceiving that the person leaned more negatively was getting in the way of them seeing this person as a potential for the future.

1350.149 - 1378.51 Darcy Eikenberg

And so I think it's an example of recognizing that we don't have to agree with others' perceptions or we don't have to like everything that's going on, but we can look at the circumstance in a... just as it is. This is just the circumstance. The circumstance is people perceive this. And then we can make a choice to say, does that... get in the way of what I want or not.

1379.11 - 1395.424 Darcy Eikenberg

And he was fighting against himself to some degree of feeling like, I don't want to change how I think. And where we ended up in really working on this was that you don't have to change what you think, but being aware of how others think

1396.485 - 1422.119 Darcy Eikenberg

helps us to be able to influence them to be able to get more of the things that we need and quite honestly not get in our own way because in an environment where people are scared where there's fear where there's worry and what environment doesn't have that today the People are drawn to people who can be realistic, but also be optimistic or be hopeful.

1422.139 - 1443.344 Darcy Eikenberg

And then not toxic positivity, not butterflies and fairies, but to be leaning more toward the future rather than, oh my gosh, how hard today and the past has been. And he had to really work on his mindset to shift that, recognizing that to do the things he wanted to do

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