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Stavros Halkias

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Pardon My Take

Ryan Fitzpatrick Talking Conference Championships, Stavros Halkios And The Ravens Loss, Ohio State Wins The Natty, Bears Get Ben Johnson And Tensions Are Mounting

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Wait a second. I'm in fucking Chicago. I'm like, Hey guys, I got to fuck you moving. Can I do the fucking show? I don't hear, hey, we can fucking put you on Amos. I get my fucking team loses. I go through heartbreak. I immediately get a fucking text, you pieces of shit. Fuck you guys. That's not fully true. Fuck you. You said you were going to come back to do PMT. Fuck you. Shut the fuck up.

Pardon My Take

Ryan Fitzpatrick Talking Conference Championships, Stavros Halkios And The Ravens Loss, Ohio State Wins The Natty, Bears Get Ben Johnson And Tensions Are Mounting

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Yeah, I'm sorry. I'm mad and I'm taking it out on you. Okay, so how are you feeling? Bad, big cat. Okay, let's talk it out. Am I echoing? Is something weird happening? The mic's cutting out just like a little bit.

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Ryan Fitzpatrick Talking Conference Championships, Stavros Halkios And The Ravens Loss, Ohio State Wins The Natty, Bears Get Ben Johnson And Tensions Are Mounting

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Yes, it did. It was fucking brutal. It was like, I don't fucking know, dude. I don't even know what to fucking say.

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Ryan Fitzpatrick Talking Conference Championships, Stavros Halkios And The Ravens Loss, Ohio State Wins The Natty, Bears Get Ben Johnson And Tensions Are Mounting

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I'm not one of these motherfuckers that thinks Lamar was the problem at all. Look, that fucking interception was a duck. That was crazy. He fucking threw a quarter of his interceptions in this fucking game. He was fucking awesome. And he throws like, a no disrespect Jameis style interception where it's like, who the fuck was he even throwing to? Like, I thought I was having a stroke.

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Ryan Fitzpatrick Talking Conference Championships, Stavros Halkios And The Ravens Loss, Ohio State Wins The Natty, Bears Get Ben Johnson And Tensions Are Mounting

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The fucking build guy just caught it like he was fair catching. I couldn't believe that. But it's like, okay, he got that shit out of his system, whatever. He comes back when it fucking matters. It's slippery. What do you want from those fucking guys from Florida? He doesn't know fucking snow. You've seen his fucking high school highlights. It's humid, but it's not cold.

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Ryan Fitzpatrick Talking Conference Championships, Stavros Halkios And The Ravens Loss, Ohio State Wins The Natty, Bears Get Ben Johnson And Tensions Are Mounting

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The fucking ball slipped out of his hand. Okay. And then at the fucking end, he takes them down. We get the touchdown. Throws it to Andrews. And I feel bad for Andrews, too, because he's fucking good. But that's a tough one, man. You do have to catch that one. Plus the fumble. Again, I feel bad for him. But it's like, this what? Three fucking turnovers. And we were in that game.

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Ryan Fitzpatrick Talking Conference Championships, Stavros Halkios And The Ravens Loss, Ohio State Wins The Natty, Bears Get Ben Johnson And Tensions Are Mounting

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That was... He didn't play bad. Yeah. And then the fucking... Why the fuck did we throw the ball when we were first and goal? Why the fuck did we run it four times? That's the kind of fucking team we are. We have fucking Derrick Henry. What the fuck? Did we break Derrick Henry in four if we're fucking goal line and they're not going to throw him the fucking ball? Can somebody explain that to me?

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Ryan Fitzpatrick Talking Conference Championships, Stavros Halkios And The Ravens Loss, Ohio State Wins The Natty, Bears Get Ben Johnson And Tensions Are Mounting

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It's the only time in my life I wish Greg Roman was our fucking offensive coordinator. That fucking time. You know that cocksucker would have ran it four times. He doesn't even know how to pass this playbook. But Todd Munkin got fucking cute. When we least needed it, you fuck. Yeah. And then we score that touchdown. Whole different fucking game. Whole different fucking game.

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Ryan Fitzpatrick Talking Conference Championships, Stavros Halkios And The Ravens Loss, Ohio State Wins The Natty, Bears Get Ben Johnson And Tensions Are Mounting

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Dude, I don't fuck... It was just like... It was bad. I keep like... It's... We were good! We didn't even deserve to lose! We were fucking good! And where the fuck was the... When we're playing Pittsburgh, I feel like every play, TJ Watts tackling a fucking running back that we tricked those dumbasses into thinking he was going to get the ball, and then Lamar... Where the fuck was that? !

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Ryan Fitzpatrick Talking Conference Championships, Stavros Halkios And The Ravens Loss, Ohio State Wins The Natty, Bears Get Ben Johnson And Tensions Are Mounting

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That's our superpower. That's what makes Lamar even better than the best than Josh Allen, for example. It's like, yeah, he can throw the ball. Yeah, he can run. But also, these motherfuckers don't even know how to defend against a run defense. Where the fuck did that go? Now, maybe I missed it. You guys have the keen eyes that I don't. You guys are bigger football guys than me.

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Ryan Fitzpatrick Talking Conference Championships, Stavros Halkios And The Ravens Loss, Ohio State Wins The Natty, Bears Get Ben Johnson And Tensions Are Mounting

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I am a football guy, but I don't watch fucking Maction or whatever the fuck. So maybe I missed one of those fucking plays.

Pardon My Take

Ryan Fitzpatrick Talking Conference Championships, Stavros Halkios And The Ravens Loss, Ohio State Wins The Natty, Bears Get Ben Johnson And Tensions Are Mounting

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Yeah, I guess. And look, I know, like, yes, that fumble was fucking huge. But that is the exact reason Lamar can't have two three-overs. Because as the fucking leader, your boys are going to might fuck up, right? And you're the one who has to make up for that. I get that. And you're right. He's never played to the standard that he plays when we're beating, you know, whatever.

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Ryan Fitzpatrick Talking Conference Championships, Stavros Halkios And The Ravens Loss, Ohio State Wins The Natty, Bears Get Ben Johnson And Tensions Are Mounting

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That game we beat Cincinnati with him and Joe Burrow doing that duel. He didn't play to that. I get that. to suck PFT's cock. He didn't play as good as a rookie. You know what I mean?

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Ryan Fitzpatrick Talking Conference Championships, Stavros Halkios And The Ravens Loss, Ohio State Wins The Natty, Bears Get Ben Johnson And Tensions Are Mounting

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It's tough to even be like, that's the tough counter-argument, and I hate how happy this is going to make you, where it's like, Lamar is the man, but a fucking rookie with his skill set, not as good a player yet, if ever, probably not as good, but had the fucking mentality to just, and he wasn't, whatever. He played a fucking dome, actually. Fuck you, PFT. It was the elements that got to him.

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Ryan Fitzpatrick Talking Conference Championships, Stavros Halkios And The Ravens Loss, Ohio State Wins The Natty, Bears Get Ben Johnson And Tensions Are Mounting

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If he was in the show, if we were in a fucking dumb, whole different ballgame, BSD, fuck you. But this is the exact conversation we're having about Peyton Manning. Yes, would you rather have Tom Brady? Sure. Cool pig panning that fucking makes guys miss and is electrifying. And I still have to watch football every week. That's how you know it's a bad loss because I'm fucking Buddhist now.

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Ryan Fitzpatrick Talking Conference Championships, Stavros Halkios And The Ravens Loss, Ohio State Wins The Natty, Bears Get Ben Johnson And Tensions Are Mounting

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And it's got me thinking about, well, I'd rather be them than you, for example, Big Cat. Now I'm like, fuck Ben Johnson. I'm like, everything's going to go bad for everybody else. Fraud. Too many fucking flea flickers. Enjoy those fucking picks he's going to throw. Caleb's going to fucking throw next year. Fuck you guys.

Pardon My Take

Ryan Fitzpatrick Talking Conference Championships, Stavros Halkios And The Ravens Loss, Ohio State Wins The Natty, Bears Get Ben Johnson And Tensions Are Mounting

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That's the hard thing because I have a lot of friends who are Bills fans. It's a fat city. Okay, I'm rooting maliciously against the Kansas City Chiefs, and I'm rooting. There's no malice with the Bills. It is like I like Buffalo. In the NFC, I could give a fuck. I mean, you know, whatever. Who cares? Whoever it is, beat the fucking— I don't know, just whoever does it beats the Chiefs. It sucks.

Pardon My Take

Ryan Fitzpatrick Talking Conference Championships, Stavros Halkios And The Ravens Loss, Ohio State Wins The Natty, Bears Get Ben Johnson And Tensions Are Mounting

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Every time, it won't be as bad as last year. Last year destroyed me. I was fucking like, I mean, literally, after the Super Bowl, here's how bad I would have been if I went on. I mean, you have proof of it. I've been sober since the Super Bowl. After that bender, I was like, what am I doing with my life?

Pardon My Take

Ryan Fitzpatrick Talking Conference Championships, Stavros Halkios And The Ravens Loss, Ohio State Wins The Natty, Bears Get Ben Johnson And Tensions Are Mounting

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I have not smoked weed, drank, taken pills, nothing because I was so depressed after the Ravens lost to the Chiefs. So it literally put me into sobriety. That loss fucked me up so bad. I watched it. I was in Baltimore. I had to watch stupid fucking red confetti fall on M&T Bank Stadium. It sucked dick.

Pardon My Take

Ryan Fitzpatrick Talking Conference Championships, Stavros Halkios And The Ravens Loss, Ohio State Wins The Natty, Bears Get Ben Johnson And Tensions Are Mounting

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So on some level, nothing is as devastating as that, especially like we're away from the Super Bowl. But like, Fuck, dude. We were so good. Yeah. Our offense was so fucking... And then the defense, which was, you know, took some while to fucking come around. We were looking pretty good. There's, you know, a couple guys will get fucking torched every once in a while, but for the most part...

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Ryan Fitzpatrick Talking Conference Championships, Stavros Halkios And The Ravens Loss, Ohio State Wins The Natty, Bears Get Ben Johnson And Tensions Are Mounting

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Shout out to fucking Zach Orr. He's figured the shit out. He's cool. I like our guys. I do. But then I'm also, you know, salary cap. I haven't looked into it. A team never stays good this long. I'm sure we're in for some bullshit departure. And we're a good organization. I get it, whatever. But fuck, dude. You know how it is. You got to win. If you're this good a team, you got to fucking win.

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Ryan Fitzpatrick Talking Conference Championships, Stavros Halkios And The Ravens Loss, Ohio State Wins The Natty, Bears Get Ben Johnson And Tensions Are Mounting

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And I'm happy to have Lamar for the rest. I don't want him ever going anywhere. Don't get me wrong. And we will be good as long as we have him. But fuck. Every 12 years. That's the pact we signed with Satan. It's the perfect amount. It is. Every 12. Sixth grade. I was in sixth grade. I was 25. It's the perfect space out, bro. It is.

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Ryan Fitzpatrick Talking Conference Championships, Stavros Halkios And The Ravens Loss, Ohio State Wins The Natty, Bears Get Ben Johnson And Tensions Are Mounting

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Has it happened only twice, but how long have the fucking Ravens been a franchise? It's pretty quick after that, you fuck.

Pardon My Take

Ryan Fitzpatrick Talking Conference Championships, Stavros Halkios And The Ravens Loss, Ohio State Wins The Natty, Bears Get Ben Johnson And Tensions Are Mounting

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I mean, I ride with Harbaugh, but it is a little, like, Because here's the real shit. We shouldn't have been playing in fucking Buffalo. I know. Why the fuck did we lose to the Raiders? I mean, you look through our fucking schedule. It's like, what the fuck, man? Like, why were we penalized? I mean, look, the first game.

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Ryan Fitzpatrick Talking Conference Championships, Stavros Halkios And The Ravens Loss, Ohio State Wins The Natty, Bears Get Ben Johnson And Tensions Are Mounting

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Hey, remember that lining up away from the fucking center call that we got 15 fucking times opening night? Did you see that called fucking once after that? I mean, these motherfuckers, it was literally like make up a rule so the Ravens lose to the fucking Chiefs. I didn't see that shit all season called on the Ravens. It happened only in opening night. Whatever. We'll take that one aside.

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Ryan Fitzpatrick Talking Conference Championships, Stavros Halkios And The Ravens Loss, Ohio State Wins The Natty, Bears Get Ben Johnson And Tensions Are Mounting

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But it's like we were a fucking penalized team. It weirdly it's shit. That's like poorly coached shit where it's like, why are we beating ourselves? Why do we almost lose to the fucking shitty Cowboys? Why the fuck did we like, why, why are we not ready to play? And our defense, like you could blame it on new coordinator. You know, it was hard to lose.

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Ryan Fitzpatrick Talking Conference Championships, Stavros Halkios And The Ravens Loss, Ohio State Wins The Natty, Bears Get Ben Johnson And Tensions Are Mounting

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It was hard to lose fucking McDonald, but like, By the end of the season, we'd figured that out. We figured our defense out. It was all the early... It was not the defensive coordinator, the new defensive coordinator that was the problem. It was overall coaching shit. And I do love Harbaugh. But it is like... He's in no way is he on a hot seat, but it's like, it ain't cold no more.

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Ryan Fitzpatrick Talking Conference Championships, Stavros Halkios And The Ravens Loss, Ohio State Wins The Natty, Bears Get Ben Johnson And Tensions Are Mounting

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You know what I mean? It's like, now I took out the thermometer. I'm looking at thermometers on Amazon. I haven't even bought it yet. But it's like, if I need at some point to see the temperature of his seat, I'm at least seeing what the best... I'm reading reviews on the best thermometer to see how hot the seat is. So we're very far away. But... It is poorly coached shit.

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Ryan Fitzpatrick Talking Conference Championships, Stavros Halkios And The Ravens Loss, Ohio State Wins The Natty, Bears Get Ben Johnson And Tensions Are Mounting

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It is like, why the fuck are we... This is the whole point of a, like, doesn't call plays, doesn't do shit. He's like a fucking... He's that traditional old school, I'm just managing everything coach. And it's like, well, how the fuck do we lose a lot of games because of penalties, if that's the fucking case? You know what I mean? And it's like, if we're at home... I don't think we lose that game.

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Ryan Fitzpatrick Talking Conference Championships, Stavros Halkios And The Ravens Loss, Ohio State Wins The Natty, Bears Get Ben Johnson And Tensions Are Mounting

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It gets so cold up there, the snow. And I have, that's another thing. That's how bad this loss was, where I'm like, we're playing outside? What is this, the fucking 1910s? What the fuck are we doing? Let's play the NBA finals on a fucking blacktop next year. Like, it's got me being like, it's crazy to have snow games. What are we talking about?

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Ryan Fitzpatrick Talking Conference Championships, Stavros Halkios And The Ravens Loss, Ohio State Wins The Natty, Bears Get Ben Johnson And Tensions Are Mounting

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The elements can't make that much of a fucking, you know, can't fuck the outcome up. Even though that's crazy, snow football is cool. But it's got me considering shit like that. Yeah. Yeah, you're changing your worldview.

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Ryan Fitzpatrick Talking Conference Championships, Stavros Halkios And The Ravens Loss, Ohio State Wins The Natty, Bears Get Ben Johnson And Tensions Are Mounting

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I know. And here's the other thing. The reason I say I'm not as big a football guy is because there was moments in my life where I was like, ah. I, you know, do I have to watch this every Sunday? Like who cares? Like, and then Lamar gets drafted. And it was like, I was back in harder than I've ever fucking been. I was like, I couldn't believe he fell to us.

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Ryan Fitzpatrick Talking Conference Championships, Stavros Halkios And The Ravens Loss, Ohio State Wins The Natty, Bears Get Ben Johnson And Tensions Are Mounting

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It's really, and it's like, why, why you motherfucker? Why couldn't we have drafted fucking Mitch Trubisky? You know what I mean? Then I'd be fine. I'd be, I'd be on, I'd be having good times on Sunday. I'd be fucking at brunch with my pals. I wouldn't give a fuck, but I'm back in. Cause I love Lamar so much. And it's hard, man. I want to be free, Big Cap, but I don't think I ever will be.

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Ryan Fitzpatrick Talking Conference Championships, Stavros Halkios And The Ravens Loss, Ohio State Wins The Natty, Bears Get Ben Johnson And Tensions Are Mounting

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I don't think I ever will be. And I do want to. I do want to not be a fan of anything. But unfortunately, this bullshit makes me so sad.

Pardon My Take

Ryan Fitzpatrick Talking Conference Championships, Stavros Halkios And The Ravens Loss, Ohio State Wins The Natty, Bears Get Ben Johnson And Tensions Are Mounting

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You copied me, dude. You copy your own Lamar? That's bullshit. You copy and pasted a Lamar. Bullshit, dude. Fuck you. I don't know. And it's also like it's also the D.C. thing with Baltimore where it's like D.C. is a bunch of fucking I know you're from Virginia, but D.C. is a bunch of fucking nerds. It's a bunch of fucking losers that want to be in politics.

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Ryan Fitzpatrick Talking Conference Championships, Stavros Halkios And The Ravens Loss, Ohio State Wins The Natty, Bears Get Ben Johnson And Tensions Are Mounting

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It's like every every like student government president tattletale lanyard wearing motherfucker is a D.C. fan. That's that town sucks dick. You know, that's where they did pizza. You know, it's like we're billionaires molest children with the president. And it's like, I got to watch that team fucking win. I watch that team fucking win.

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Ryan Fitzpatrick Talking Conference Championships, Stavros Halkios And The Ravens Loss, Ohio State Wins The Natty, Bears Get Ben Johnson And Tensions Are Mounting

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You know, and Philly at least is like they are our white trash cousin. There's so much similarity to Philadelphia and Baltimore that it's like. I don't know. There's a little part of me is like, it would have hurt me to have to face Philly in the fuck. It's like a battle of, it's like the Civil War. It would have been a battle of brothers. It's the Hatfield and McCoys. Yeah.

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Ryan Fitzpatrick Talking Conference Championships, Stavros Halkios And The Ravens Loss, Ohio State Wins The Natty, Bears Get Ben Johnson And Tensions Are Mounting

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Anyway, who knows, man? I just I can't have the fucking Chiefs win and they will. They fucking will. Because that's how the world works. Because we're in a time where evil prevails. Everything is going bad. Fucking Mark Zuckerberg's on TRT stealing all our fucking information as we fucking speak. They're rolling back civil rights shit. The fucking the fucking Chiefs are going to win again.

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Ryan Fitzpatrick Talking Conference Championships, Stavros Halkios And The Ravens Loss, Ohio State Wins The Natty, Bears Get Ben Johnson And Tensions Are Mounting

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We're fucked. Nothing good is ever going to come. We gotta hope for, like, President Travis fucking... Travis Kelsey Jr. The only way we'll fucking have him, yeah, he'll be president. Him and Taylor Swift's son will be elected God Emperor of America in fucking 35 years, dude.

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Ryan Fitzpatrick Talking Conference Championships, Stavros Halkios And The Ravens Loss, Ohio State Wins The Natty, Bears Get Ben Johnson And Tensions Are Mounting

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The Ravens are still good. They're still good. We're still good. But this is tough to coming off these two back to back. No, that's the tough thing is like we are good. And that's what that's what we are. So you know what this is like? It's like you have the best girlfriend of all time. Everything's great. And she just gets drunk, sucks one guy off. I can get past it.

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Ryan Fitzpatrick Talking Conference Championships, Stavros Halkios And The Ravens Loss, Ohio State Wins The Natty, Bears Get Ben Johnson And Tensions Are Mounting

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I can get past it because everything else is perfect and it was maybe a one-time thing. But when it's dark and I'm in my room alone, I'm imagining her sucking that guy's dick. You know what I mean? And that's what this was. The fumble is sucking a guy's dick. The drop is sucking a guy's dick. Not running for it on fucking second and goal is sucking a guy's dick.

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Ryan Fitzpatrick Talking Conference Championships, Stavros Halkios And The Ravens Loss, Ohio State Wins The Natty, Bears Get Ben Johnson And Tensions Are Mounting

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And I have to think about that, even though I love my wife, the Ravens. She stuck the guy's cock in Cabo, and I have to fucking live with that. And you know what? She actually did it two years in a row. And it's on thin ice now, now that I think about it.

Pardon My Take

Ryan Fitzpatrick Talking Conference Championships, Stavros Halkios And The Ravens Loss, Ohio State Wins The Natty, Bears Get Ben Johnson And Tensions Are Mounting

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Yeah. I want to see someone do it. I want to see someone do it. That would be good. Like a kicker misses a big kick. He's just like, oh.

Pardon My Take

Ryan Fitzpatrick Talking Conference Championships, Stavros Halkios And The Ravens Loss, Ohio State Wins The Natty, Bears Get Ben Johnson And Tensions Are Mounting

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Appreciate that. And you know what? You waited 24 hours, but it's like, in my mind, you texted me the moment the game ended. Yeah, yeah. It has been so painful.

Pardon My Take

Ryan Fitzpatrick Talking Conference Championships, Stavros Halkios And The Ravens Loss, Ohio State Wins The Natty, Bears Get Ben Johnson And Tensions Are Mounting

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I'm coming to Chicago. I want you guys to be there. Yeah, Chicago Theater, please come out. Yeah, I have a huge tour coming out, the Dreamboat tour. It's like over 40 cities. We're doing a tour bus. It's going to be a big-time tour. I'm very excited about that. Please buy tickets to see me. I won't kill myself if those shows sell out.

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Ryan Fitzpatrick Talking Conference Championships, Stavros Halkios And The Ravens Loss, Ohio State Wins The Natty, Bears Get Ben Johnson And Tensions Are Mounting

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Um, and yeah, that's, I mean, it's the tour, the movie, let's start a cult available on demand and we're working to get it on Hulu pretty soon. Um, and yes, Davi's world. It's really, I really want people to see the, to come see me live. You know, it's a good show. It's a fun show, I promise. And, yeah, watch the movie. We have the podcast. That's pretty much it, man.

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Ryan Fitzpatrick Talking Conference Championships, Stavros Halkios And The Ravens Loss, Ohio State Wins The Natty, Bears Get Ben Johnson And Tensions Are Mounting

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You do. There's there is plenty of nudity mean my nudity on that motherfucker for sure. Yeah. Yeah. So, yeah, that's it. So go to Stavi.biz for the rest of the dates. That's Chicago and Madison. But I start February 21st in like Sacramento. And then we we end February or we end May 11th in or May 12th in D.C. So it's literally like we're doing the West Coast, the South, the Midwest.

Pardon My Take

Ryan Fitzpatrick Talking Conference Championships, Stavros Halkios And The Ravens Loss, Ohio State Wins The Natty, Bears Get Ben Johnson And Tensions Are Mounting

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And then we're going to come back and hit more of the East Coast in the fall. But yeah, Stavi.biz. That's pretty much it. Yeah, thanks, guys. I actually do feel better having spoken to you, getting it out for real. At least it wasn't festering for two weeks. Last year, I really was depressed for two straight weeks.

Pardon My Take

Ryan Fitzpatrick Talking Conference Championships, Stavros Halkios And The Ravens Loss, Ohio State Wins The Natty, Bears Get Ben Johnson And Tensions Are Mounting

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no no no no no it's by the way those guys are funny yeah no shots at them it was just you know of course i get the quick we can move some shit around when the ravens lose that's wrong i did say i did my ravens my text to him was literally like hey can you come on tomorrow we can do any time I know. I last minute even said I moved it two hours just to see how open you really were.

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Ryan Fitzpatrick Talking Conference Championships, Stavros Halkios And The Ravens Loss, Ohio State Wins The Natty, Bears Get Ben Johnson And Tensions Are Mounting

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And you're like, no problem, man. We'll figure it out. We got it, dude. We'll stay here until midnight.

Your Mom's House with Christina P. and Tom Segura

The High and Tight 800th Episode | Your Mom's House Ep. 800

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You ready?

Your Mom's House with Christina P. and Tom Segura

The High and Tight 800th Episode | Your Mom's House Ep. 800

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No, dude. No. Mix it up.

Your Mom's House with Christina P. and Tom Segura

The High and Tight 800th Episode | Your Mom's House Ep. 800

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I take back what I said about his recipe. I don't want to... No, no, no, no! Oh, no! Oh, fuck! Fuck, dude, that's disgusting. That fucking sucks so much. Oh, my God. Why did it come out so fast? Why did it come out so fast? Jesus Christ. I literally... I don't even gag easy, dude. That shit is fucked up. I don't want to watch me eat it. Don't eat it, Norm, please.

Your Mom's House with Christina P. and Tom Segura

The High and Tight 800th Episode | Your Mom's House Ep. 800

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Look at this gooey turd. Oh, my God.

Your Mom's House with Christina P. and Tom Segura

The High and Tight 800th Episode | Your Mom's House Ep. 800

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Why the fuck did it come out so fast?

Your Mom's House with Christina P. and Tom Segura

The High and Tight 800th Episode | Your Mom's House Ep. 800

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No, I wasn't.

Your Mom's House with Christina P. and Tom Segura

The High and Tight 800th Episode | Your Mom's House Ep. 800

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Yeah. I don't anymore.