Rosebud Baker
Appearances
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump's $5M Immigrant "Gold Card," Elon's First Cabinet Meeting, | Rosebud Baker
Yeah, no, I guess I left something on the table there.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump's $5M Immigrant "Gold Card," Elon's First Cabinet Meeting, | Rosebud Baker
saw what I did. Yeah, no, I should have thought of that. I really should have.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump's $5M Immigrant "Gold Card," Elon's First Cabinet Meeting, | Rosebud Baker
Yeah, a lot of blood, so. Yeah, we saved the people. Kind of pulse focus. Totally. Plus, you don't want the baby to upstage you. Right, yeah. What's important is that the spotlight stays on me. That's exactly right.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump's $5M Immigrant "Gold Card," Elon's First Cabinet Meeting, | Rosebud Baker
Yeah, I just, I wasn't sure. I was someone who wasn't sure if I wanted kids or not. And I kind of tortured myself with the decision. And I also wasn't sure that I had an hour that I could confidently put out. So... It was, you know, necessity is the mother of invention type of a situation.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump's $5M Immigrant "Gold Card," Elon's First Cabinet Meeting, | Rosebud Baker
But also, I just, when I watch it now, I think of, like, my child-free self and how I wished that I had something like that to watch so that I didn't have to torture myself. Something that was, like, really, really honest about what it took to get pregnant, even. Because, you know, they tell you... Just like if you're not double condom, you know, everything, your life is over.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump's $5M Immigrant "Gold Card," Elon's First Cabinet Meeting, | Rosebud Baker
And you can get pregnant like one day a month, you know? Right. Yeah. Like upside down. Which is how you did it. Yeah, which is how I prefer to do it.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump's $5M Immigrant "Gold Card," Elon's First Cabinet Meeting, | Rosebud Baker
How long do things stay on the internet? Oh, no one will catch it. No, no, I don't regret it at all. I mean, listen, every day, it's like, I've definitely changed, you know? I was a huge bitch before, and now it's worse. Yeah.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump's $5M Immigrant "Gold Card," Elon's First Cabinet Meeting, | Rosebud Baker
So I can say that. Yeah. You know. But no, I don't regret it.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump's $5M Immigrant "Gold Card," Elon's First Cabinet Meeting, | Rosebud Baker
I honestly... I think that the whole notion that women, like, are soft or that they're not on their game, I don't think motherhood does that to women. I think bad husbands do that to women. Yeah. I think... I think bad husbands are the problem.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump's $5M Immigrant "Gold Card," Elon's First Cabinet Meeting, | Rosebud Baker
Yeah, so my husband and I are both recovering alcoholics. I'm ADD, he's depressed. I think comedy's like the least of her worries. She's good. Yeah, it pains me to say this, but it might be the best case scenario for her.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump's $5M Immigrant "Gold Card," Elon's First Cabinet Meeting, | Rosebud Baker
Therapy's helpful. It's like, you know, you know what's better than laughter is medicine. Yes. You know, I mean, I feel like Patch Adams was goofy, but he still gave those kids chemo. Yeah.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump's $5M Immigrant "Gold Card," Elon's First Cabinet Meeting, | Rosebud Baker
I'm asking for a friend. Well, it's helpful that they pay me. Yes, that does come in handy. But I will say that this is a good tip. Just focusing on yourself, breathing. When I go into work, I'll just take a deep breath, I'll center myself, and then I'll just kick one pigeon as far as I can.
The Daily Show: Ears Edition
Trump's $5M Immigrant "Gold Card," Elon's First Cabinet Meeting, | Rosebud Baker
Kick a pigeon.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 202: Kyle Dunnigan & Blair Socci
We have tomatoes. We have, um, how do you say it again? Cucumber. Cucumbers. What? Whoa. How do you say cucumber? Whoa. You grew up in Massachusetts. Whoa.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 201: Ms. Pat & Rosebud Baker
You still, okay, all right. Yeah, I'm born and raised.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 201: Ms. Pat & Rosebud Baker
They were fucking getting up to go do coke in the bathroom during the show. Wow. You hear that dumb diner register? Because they told me. They were telling me, which is shocking. But I was like, I made a joke about, are you guys going to do coke? And they were like, yeah. And then I started to notice. I was like, oh, they for real are doing coke in the bathroom. Which is a crazy way to do it.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 201: Ms. Pat & Rosebud Baker
I've never been to Claremont, but I have wanted to go.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 201: Ms. Pat & Rosebud Baker
I already spoke to him today. Uh-oh. Oh, y'all got the same gay consultant?
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 201: Ms. Pat & Rosebud Baker
We're filming a podcast right now. We're filming a podcast. Hey! I'm here with Miss Pat and Mark and, oh, sorry. I know him.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 201: Ms. Pat & Rosebud Baker
They are real. No. What did he say? Are constellations real?
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 201: Ms. Pat & Rosebud Baker
Oh, yes. Yes, they're real. They're absolutely real.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 201: Ms. Pat & Rosebud Baker
Nick, I don't have time for this. That's ridiculous.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 201: Ms. Pat & Rosebud Baker
We're like, hey, is this gay if you... Yeah, actually, we're about to ask something just as ridiculous, but Sam put water on the... Why don't you say it?
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 201: Ms. Pat & Rosebud Baker
And constellations are real. Okay. Why y'all got to call them constellations?
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 201: Ms. Pat & Rosebud Baker
That was so fucking pathetic that we're all doing a podcast at the same time.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 201: Ms. Pat & Rosebud Baker
Oh, okay. Can't you tell how sheltered he is? You went to private school. I did. Yeah. Your whole life?
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 201: Ms. Pat & Rosebud Baker
Glenn Close was in that recent movie. Oh, the white woman, the white woman. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 201: Ms. Pat & Rosebud Baker
I don't know anyone who's like a person of color that calls themselves like a POC.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 201: Ms. Pat & Rosebud Baker
That's a good way to... I mean, that would have been the people a day back. That was your people.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 201: Ms. Pat & Rosebud Baker
yeah well uh that's like who was my people king tuck he was probably kidding in new york my people she was foreign she was like drunk enough that she just sort of let it huh what's the people over there african name what's the african people the kings and queens what african people nubian jazz what's the king over there in africa yeah black panther
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 201: Ms. Pat & Rosebud Baker
I know that. I can already see the clip from this podcast. It's just multiple takes of Ms. Scott giving you a look.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 201: Ms. Pat & Rosebud Baker
oh even lovemaking i don't like just i don't like a lot of sweat on some not necessarily when it comes to sex it's a different thing but when just in the workplace yeah it's really sweaty it annoys me i hear you it feels like you get a handle on yourself you really some people can't i know some people just over press bars or whatever it is i'm like whatever your problem is get fix it
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 201: Ms. Pat & Rosebud Baker
Oh my God, I'd have beat the shit out of him. My kid's going to end up like that, though.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 201: Ms. Pat & Rosebud Baker
I'm scared because she's already like, she runs off and is moving really quickly and just won't mind her own business.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 201: Ms. Pat & Rosebud Baker
yeah gary though yeah has she interrupted sex life yet no they don't have sex no yeah no but she actually stays like she's like she has her own room which is nice um but for a while there we were like this is fucked we're fucking in the same room as our kid wow yeah well you fucked in that same room together
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 201: Ms. Pat & Rosebud Baker
Well, she couldn't even, she didn't, like, know she has hands. Right, right. She was, like, not even.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 201: Ms. Pat & Rosebud Baker
She's learning to talk. Her first sounds did sound like Forrest Gump, you know, like when his mom was fucking the principal.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 201: Ms. Pat & Rosebud Baker
It's not really that I was that concerned about what it would do for her. It was like it was just in the back of my mind like she's in here. You know what I mean? Like, it messes with it.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 201: Ms. Pat & Rosebud Baker
Medicaid titties is a great title for something. Yeah, that's true.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 201: Ms. Pat & Rosebud Baker
I'm just curious, were bottles of lube, does that count as evidence?
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 201: Ms. Pat & Rosebud Baker
They were doing that at the Creek in the Cave when I first moved to New York. Wow. Doing what? They were doing like KY Jelly Wrestling in the basement at the Creek in the Cave when I first moved here.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 201: Ms. Pat & Rosebud Baker
Or he's just got a Costco membership. That too. He buys in bulk.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 201: Ms. Pat & Rosebud Baker
But human trafficking is when you get the sex workers to recruit more sex workers, right? It's like once it once it goes. So why is it not a job?
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 201: Ms. Pat & Rosebud Baker
That's a good question. In this world where a man just randomly runs up and fucking bites your tit, you're...
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 201: Ms. Pat & Rosebud Baker
I mean, look up why this is bad. Is this something you don't want? I think that's the thing that makes it a salt.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 201: Ms. Pat & Rosebud Baker
I mean... Because if you're yanking your titty back, then it's a salt.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 201: Ms. Pat & Rosebud Baker
Yeah, because I just finished my tour. I just shot my special last night. Whoa! Yay! Yeah. Who are you shooting for? Netflix.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 201: Ms. Pat & Rosebud Baker
That's exciting. Yeah. Yeah. It was fucking great. It was here in New York? If it's as good as it felt, I'm happy.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 201: Ms. Pat & Rosebud Baker
Was it here in New York? Yeah. It was Village Underground.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 201: Ms. Pat & Rosebud Baker
I did do two. The concept was that I was going to shoot half of it pregnant and the other half a year after I had my kid. And now I'm looking at it and I'm going, I don't know if I need the first half. I think I like the hour that I wrote as it is. I don't really want to fuck with it.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 201: Ms. Pat & Rosebud Baker
we'll see i'm like i got a great editor and i said if you can make it work great and if you can't then drop the first hour leave the second and we'll use whatever footage from that we can it's very unique i don't think i've ever seen anything like that you could also use the pregnancy stuff and like the credits or something that's what i'm saying i'm like let's not force it you know like a chopped up you know i don't want somebody to go well it was good it was like a good idea i
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 201: Ms. Pat & Rosebud Baker
I chose not to breastfeed. I decided not to. Really? Yeah.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 201: Ms. Pat & Rosebud Baker
I was like, it's too much. It's like every three hours for like an hour. It's a full job.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 201: Ms. Pat & Rosebud Baker
No, you only pump if you if you breastfeed. Oh, you don't breastfeed and you take Benadryl for five days in a row. All your milk dries up. I read it on Reddit. I just I found a hack and I was like, I'm just going to dry it all up because I'm not doing this.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 201: Ms. Pat & Rosebud Baker
Right. Yeah, it's tough. I mean, I chose it. I was like, I don't want to do it the other way. So it was like scheduled and everything. I didn't have to like go through labor.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 201: Ms. Pat & Rosebud Baker
I was like, I don't trust it. I feel like everything's going to fall out. Is your husband white? Yeah.